1. Amazing. This is amazing!Copy !req
2. Listen to this:
The entire work force of Virginia...Copy !req
3. had Solitaire removed
from their computers...Copy !req
4. because they hadn't done
any work in six weeks.Copy !req
5. - That's so sad.
- Do you know what this is?Copy !req
6. What we're seeing here is the end of
Western civilization as we know it.Copy !req
7. Oh. Hey, aren't you late?Copy !req
8. Technology. Name me one thing
that we've gained from technology.Copy !req
9. Electricity.Copy !req
10. That's one. You think this machine's
your friend, but it's not.Copy !req
11. - I'm out of here.
- See you tonight.Copy !req
12. - Sushi!
- Sushi!Copy !req
13. Bye!Copy !req
14. Welcome.Copy !req
15. You've got mail.Copy !req
16. "Brinkley is my dog. He loves the streets
of New York as much as I do."Copy !req
17. Although he likes to eat pizza
and bagel off the sidewalk...Copy !req
18. and I prefer to buy them.Copy !req
19. Brinkley is a great catcher who was
offered a tryout on the Mets.Copy !req
20. But he chose to stay with me
so he could spend 18 hours a day...Copy !req
21. sleeping on a large green pillow
the size of an inner tube.Copy !req
22. Don't you love New York in the fall?Copy !req
23. Makes me want to buy school supplies.Copy !req
24. I'm almost ready.Copy !req
25. I would send you a bouquet
of newly sharpened pencils...Copy !req
26. if I knew your name and address.Copy !req
27. On the other hand,
this not knowing has its charms.Copy !req
28. Did you push it?
- Yeah.Copy !req
29. Yes, I pushed it.Copy !req
30. I'm so late.Copy !req
31. Random House fired Dick Atkins.
Good riddance.Copy !req
32. Murray Chilton died. That's one less person
I'm not speaking to.Copy !req
33. Hurry! Hurry! Hurry! Uch!Copy !req
34. Vince got a great review.
He'll be insufferable.Copy !req
35. Tonight, PEN dinner.Copy !req
36. - Am I going?
- Joe Fox, you promised.Copy !req
37. It's black-tie.Copy !req
38. - Ohh...
- Can't I just give money instead?Copy !req
39. What is it this week?
"Free Albanian writers"?Copy !req
40. I'm in favor of that.Copy !req
41. Ohh. Ohh.Copy !req
42. Okay, I'll go. I'll go. You're late.Copy !req
43. I know, I know.Copy !req
44. Good morning, Miss Eden.Copy !req
45. Who's a happy dog? Who's a happy dog?Copy !req
46. Welcome.
- Welcome.Copy !req
47. - You've got mail.
- You've got mail.Copy !req
48. All right. Okay. Get down, get down.Copy !req
49. I like to start my notes to you...Copy !req
50. as if we're already
in the middle of a conversation.Copy !req
51. I pretend that we're the oldest
and dearest friends...Copy !req
52. as opposed to what
we actually are:Copy !req
53. People who don't know
each other's names...Copy !req
54. and met in a chat room where we
both claimed we'd never been before.Copy !req
55. "What will NY1 52 say today?"
I wonder.Copy !req
56. I turn on my computer.Copy !req
57. I wait impatiently as it connects.Copy !req
58. I go online...Copy !req
59. and my breath catches in my chest
until I hear three little words:Copy !req
60. "You've got mail."Copy !req
61. I hear nothing, not even a sound
on the streets of New York.Copy !req
62. Just the beat of my own heart.Copy !req
63. I have mail...Copy !req
64. from you.Copy !req
65. The electrical contractor called,
his truck hit a deer last night.Copy !req
66. So he's not gonna be here
till tomorrow.Copy !req
67. And upstairs, the shelves are late...Copy !req
68. because the pine
we ordered has beetles.Copy !req
69. Very good, very good.Copy !req
70. And we got a $50,000 ticket for
construction workers peeing off the roof.Copy !req
71. Great. That is great.
Is the electrician here?Copy !req
72. I just told you he hit a deer.
I knew you weren't listening to me.Copy !req
73. You're right. I wasn't.Copy !req
74. "I hear nothing.Copy !req
75. Not a sound on the city streets,
just the beat of my own heart."Copy !req
76. I think that's how it goes.
Something like that.Copy !req
77. You and Patricia got engaged, didn't you?
You can tell me.Copy !req
78. - Engaged?
Come on.Copy !req
79. Are you crazy?Copy !req
80. I thought you liked Patricia.Copy !req
81. I do. I do. I love Patricia.
I love Patricia.Copy !req
82. Patricia is— Patricia's amazing.
She makes coffee nervous.Copy !req
83. We should announce ourselves
to the neighborhood.Copy !req
84. Let them know, here we come.Copy !req
85. This is the Upper West Side.Copy !req
86. We might as well tell them
we're opening a crack house.Copy !req
87. They're going to hate us.Copy !req
88. They're gonna be lining up...Copy !req
89. To picket the big, bad chain store...Copy !req
90. That's out to destroy—Copy !req
91. Everything they hold dear.Copy !req
92. We're going to seduce them
with our square footage...Copy !req
93. and our discounts
and our deep armchairs...Copy !req
94. And our cappuccino.Copy !req
95. They're going to hate us
at the beginning...Copy !req
96. But we'll get them in the end.Copy !req
97. - And you know why?
- Why?Copy !req
98. Because we're gonna sell them cheap books
and legal addictive stimulants.Copy !req
99. In the meantime,
we'll just put up a big sign:Copy !req
100. "Coming soon, a Fox Books Superstore.
The end of civilization...Copy !req
101. as you know it."Copy !req
102. Good morning, Christina.Copy !req
103. Morning, Kathleen.Copy !req
104. It's a beautiful day.
Isn't it just the most beautiful day?Copy !req
105. I guess. Yeah, sure.Copy !req
106. Idiot, what are you doing?
I got the green light!Copy !req
107. Don't you just love New York in the fall?Copy !req
108. Perfect.Copy !req
109. Mm. Can't beat that.Copy !req
110. Scotch tape? What is going on with you?Copy !req
111. Nothing.Copy !req
112. - You're in love.
- In love? No.Copy !req
113. Oh, yes, that's right!
I'm in love with Frank.Copy !req
114. I'm practically living with Frank. Hmm.Copy !req
115. Do you think you could get our
Christmas mailers out this week?Copy !req
116. Yeah, by Monday, I promise.
I have this paper due Friday.Copy !req
117. What is going on?Copy !req
118. Nothing, nothing. Nothing at all.Copy !req
119. You know, I am just going to
stand here until you tell me.Copy !req
120. All right.Copy !req
121. Is it infidelity if you're involved
with someone on e-mail?Copy !req
122. Have you had sex?Copy !req
123. No, I don't even know him.Copy !req
124. - I mean cybersex.
- No.Copy !req
125. Well, don't do it. The minute you do,
they lose all respect for you.Copy !req
126. Well, it's not like that.Copy !req
127. We just e-mail. It's really nothing.Copy !req
128. On top of which, I'm thinking of
stopping because it's getting...Copy !req
129. Out of hand?Copy !req
130. Confusing.Copy !req
131. But not. Because it's nothing.Copy !req
132. Where'd you meet him?Copy !req
133. Listen, I can't even remember.Copy !req
134. On my birthday, I wandered into
the "over 30" room for a joke, sort of.Copy !req
135. And he was there.
And we started chatting.Copy !req
136. About what?Copy !req
137. Books and music,
how much we both love New York...Copy !req
138. Harmless, harmless.Copy !req
139. Meaningless.Copy !req
140. Bouquets of sharpened pencils. Oh.Copy !req
141. Excuse me?Copy !req
142. Forget it.Copy !req
143. We don't talk about anything personal,
so I don't know his name...Copy !req
144. or what he does
or where he lives exactly...Copy !req
145. so it'll be easy for me to stop
seeing him, because I'm not.Copy !req
146. He could be the next person
to walk into the store.Copy !req
147. - I know.
He could be...Copy !req
148. George.Copy !req
149. Morning.Copy !req
150. Are you online?Copy !req
151. As far as I'm concerned...Copy !req
152. the lnternet is just another way
of being rejected by a woman.Copy !req
153. Good morning.Copy !req
154. Good morning, Birdie.Copy !req
155. What are you girls talking about?Copy !req
156. Cybersex.Copy !req
157. I tried to have cybersex once,
but I kept getting a busy signal.Copy !req
158. I know.Copy !req
159. I was really depressed
one Saturday night about 9:00—Copy !req
160. Time to open up!Copy !req
161. Jessica and Maya, how are you today?Copy !req
162. Want to say hi to Kathleen?
Hi, Kathleen.Copy !req
163. Good morning, Shop Around the Corner.Copy !req
164. George speaking. May I help you?Copy !req
165. Construction's going well.
We should open on time.Copy !req
166. Although Kevin and I are concerned
about the neighborhood response.Copy !req
167. This fabric on the couch, what is it?
Does it have a name?Copy !req
168. Money.
Huh?Copy !req
169. - lts name is "Money."
Oh.Copy !req
170. - Gillian selected it.
- Good guess.Copy !req
171. - Your father's getting married again.
- Really?Copy !req
172. - Congratulations!
- Thank you.Copy !req
173. - Why?
- Who knows?Copy !req
174. - Love?
- Possible.Copy !req
175. I think you're a damn fool.Copy !req
176. Pops, Matthew is 4 years old, okay?Copy !req
177. It'd be nice if his parents were married.Copy !req
178. Listen, I have a
sad announcement to make.Copy !req
179. City Books, on 23rd Street?Copy !req
180. It's going under.Copy !req
181. Aw. Another independent bites the dust.Copy !req
182. On to the next!Copy !req
183. Going to buy out their entire
inventory of architecture...Copy !req
184. and New York history
for the new store.Copy !req
185. How much, son? How much you paying?Copy !req
186. Whatever it costs, it won't be as much...Copy !req
187. as that uncomfortable
mohair episode there...Copy !req
188. which is now all over my suit.Copy !req
189. Here you go.Copy !req
190. Thanks.Copy !req
191. We'll also have a section dedicated to
writers who've lived on the West Side.Copy !req
192. As a sop to the neighborhood.Copy !req
193. Perfect. Keep those West Side,
liberal nuts, pseudo-intellectual—Copy !req
194. Readers, Dad. They're called readers.Copy !req
195. Don't do that, son.
Don't romanticize them.Copy !req
196. It'll keep them from jumping
down your throat.Copy !req
197. What's the competition?Copy !req
198. One mystery store, Sleuth,
at 78th and Amsterdam...Copy !req
199. and a children's bookstore,
Shop Around the Corner.Copy !req
200. - It's been there forever.
- Cecilia's store.Copy !req
201. Who's that?Copy !req
202. Cecilia Kelly.Copy !req
203. Lovely woman. I think we might
have had a date once.Copy !req
204. Or maybe we just exchanged letters.Copy !req
205. You wrote her letters?Copy !req
206. Mail. It was called mail.Copy !req
207. Stamps, envelopes—
- I've heard of it.Copy !req
208. Cecilia had beautiful penmanship.Copy !req
209. She was too young for me...Copy !req
210. but she was enchanting.Copy !req
211. - Enchanting?
- Her daughter owns it now.Copy !req
212. Huh. Too bad for her.Copy !req
213. Ah.Copy !req
214. Excuse me, Mr. Fox.
- Yeah.Copy !req
215. My father is getting married again.Copy !req
216. For five years, he's been living
with a woman named Gillian...Copy !req
217. who studied decorating
at Caesar's Palace.Copy !req
218. Is it porcelain?Copy !req
219. Rubber.Copy !req
220. Once I read a story about a
butterfly in the subway, and today...Copy !req
221. I saw one.Copy !req
222. It got on at 42nd
and off at 59th where...Copy !req
223. I assume it went
to Bloomingdale's...Copy !req
224. to buy a hat that will
turn out to be a mistake.Copy !req
225. As almost all hats are.Copy !req
226. Listen to this:Copy !req
227. Every night a truck pulls up
to my neighborhood bagel place...Copy !req
228. and pumps about a ton of flour
into underground tanks.Copy !req
229. The air is filled with white dust
which never seems to land.Copy !req
230. Why is that?Copy !req
231. I've read
Pride and Prejudice about 200 times.Copy !req
232. I get lost in the language. Words like:Copy !req
233. "Thither."Copy !req
234. "Mischance."Copy !req
235. "Felicity."Copy !req
236. I'm always in agony over whether
Elizabeth and Mr. Darcy...Copy !req
237. are really going to get together.Copy !req
238. Read it.Copy !req
239. I know you'll love it.Copy !req
240. The purpose of places like Starbucks...Copy !req
241. is for people with
no decision-making ability...Copy !req
242. to make six decisions
just to buy one cup of coffee.Copy !req
243. Short, tall, light, dark...Copy !req
244. caf, decaf...Copy !req
245. low-fat, nonfat...Copy !req
246. et cetera.Copy !req
247. Mocha frappuccino grande.Copy !req
248. So people who don't know
what the hell they're doing...Copy !req
249. or who on earth they are
can, for only 2.95...Copy !req
250. get not just a cup of coffee...Copy !req
251. but an absolutely
defining sense of self.Copy !req
252. Tall, skim, caramel macchiato.Copy !req
253. Tall!Copy !req
254. Decaf!Copy !req
255. Cappuccino!Copy !req
256. Tall, decaf cappuccino.Copy !req
257. Bummer!Copy !req
258. A Fox Books superstore.Copy !req
259. Quel nightmare.Copy !req
260. It has nothing to do with us.
It's big, impersonal...Copy !req
261. overstocked and full
of ignorant salespeople.Copy !req
262. But they discount.Copy !req
263. But they don't provide any service.Copy !req
264. We do.Copy !req
265. So really...Copy !req
266. it's a good development.Copy !req
267. You know how in the flower district
there are all those shops...Copy !req
268. so you can find whatever you want?Copy !req
269. This is going to be the book district.Copy !req
270. If they don't have it, we do.Copy !req
271. And vice versa.Copy !req
272. Absolutely.Copy !req
273. When you are finished with Fox Books...Copy !req
274. The Shop Around the Corner
is gonna be responsible...Copy !req
275. for reversing the entire course
of the lndustrial Revolution.Copy !req
276. Well, now, that is so sweet. Frank!Copy !req
277. Thank you. That is so sweet.Copy !req
278. - Although l—
- What?Copy !req
279. Wait a minute. What is that doing here?Copy !req
280. Oh! Oh, my gosh!Copy !req
281. This is amazing.Copy !req
282. Listen.Copy !req
283. The Olympia Report Deluxe electric.Copy !req
284. Report.Copy !req
285. As in gunshot.Copy !req
286. - That sound is familiar.
- Listen to this.Copy !req
287. What, that whirring?Copy !req
288. The gentle, soothing lullaby...Copy !req
289. of a piece of machinery so perfect—Copy !req
290. I know where
I've heard that before, Frank.Copy !req
291. I needed a backup.Copy !req
292. Don't you have another one
at your apartment?Copy !req
293. - I might.
- That you wrote a column about?Copy !req
294. Yes. Who cares?Copy !req
295. What were you gonna say?Copy !req
296. - When?
- Before.Copy !req
297. - Nothing.
- Come on.Copy !req
298. Well, I'm just wondering.
I'm wondering about my work. I'm just—Copy !req
299. What is it that I do, exactly?
All I really do is—Copy !req
300. All you really do...Copy !req
301. is this incredibly noble thing.Copy !req
302. - I don't know. Really, I'm just—
- Kathleen!Copy !req
303. You are a lone reed.Copy !req
304. You are a lone...Copy !req
305. reed...Copy !req
306. standing...Copy !req
307. tall...Copy !req
308. waving boldly...Copy !req
309. in the corrupt sands...Copy !req
310. of commerce.Copy !req
311. - I am a lone reed.
- Lone reed.Copy !req
312. I am a lone reed.Copy !req
313. Sometimes I wonder about my life.Copy !req
314. I lead a small life.Copy !req
315. Well, valuable, but small.Copy !req
316. And sometimes I wonder...Copy !req
317. do I do it because I like it...Copy !req
318. or because I haven't been brave?Copy !req
319. So much of what I see reminds me
of something I read in a book...Copy !req
320. when shouldn't it be
the other way around?Copy !req
321. I don't want an answer.
I just want...Copy !req
322. to send this cosmic question
out into the void.Copy !req
323. So...Copy !req
324. good night, dear void.Copy !req
325. Hey, Joe!
Hello, Joe.Copy !req
326. Hey! I know you!Copy !req
327. I know you. Hello, Annabel, little girl.Copy !req
328. Hi.
- How are you?Copy !req
329. And you!Copy !req
330. - Matthew, how are you?
Good.Copy !req
331. Good.Copy !req
332. Ready to say hello to New Jersey?Copy !req
333. Hello, New Jersey!Copy !req
334. Don't I get a hello?Copy !req
335. Hello, Gillian.Copy !req
336. Kiss me. I'm gonna be
your wicked stepmother.Copy !req
337. There you go.Copy !req
338. Hello. And who is this?Copy !req
339. Nanny Maureen. I brought her in case
you couldn't handle the kids.Copy !req
340. Maureen's getting a divorce.Copy !req
341. Oh. I'm sorry to hear that.Copy !req
342. It's my own fault.
Never marry a man who lies.Copy !req
343. That is so wise. Annabel, remember that.Copy !req
344. She taught Matt to spell his name.Copy !req
345. Really?Copy !req
346. - Let's hear it.
- F-O-X.Copy !req
347. Excellent!Copy !req
348. Excellent. I've got this covered.
You can have the day off.Copy !req
349. And you must be late for something.
Volunteering, rolling bandages...Copy !req
350. for Bosnian refugees.Copy !req
351. I am. I'm having my eggs harvested.Copy !req
352. And getting those eggs harvested.
Don't worry! See you later.Copy !req
353. - Bye, Maureen! Bye, Gillian!
- Bye!Copy !req
354. Bye, Mom.Copy !req
355. All right, you guys, are you ready
to go out on the boat?Copy !req
356. - No!
- No!Copy !req
357. What happened to you? What happened?Copy !req
358. Come on, one more time.Copy !req
359. Here, you can do that one.Copy !req
360. Hey!Copy !req
361. What do we win?Copy !req
362. Look, look, look!Copy !req
363. - Oh!
- Yay!Copy !req
364. How are the fish doing?
- Very well, I think they're very happy.Copy !req
365. - Are they?
- Yes.Copy !req
366. You guys want to go to a movie?Copy !req
367. No, there's nothing good playing.Copy !req
368. Look! A storybook lady.Copy !req
369. Are we at the right time? Yeah, let's go.Copy !req
370. "That it was I and I alone...Copy !req
371. who had the idea for
the great and daring mouse plot.Copy !req
372. We all have our moments
of brilliance and glory...Copy !req
373. and this was mine.Copy !req
374. 'Why don't we,' I said...Copy !req
375. 'slip it into one of
Mrs. Pratchett's jars of sweets?Copy !req
376. And then...Copy !req
377. when she puts her dirty hand in
to grab a handful...Copy !req
378. she will grab a stinky
dead mouse instead.'Copy !req
379. The other four stared at me in wonder.Copy !req
380. Then, as the sheer genius
of the plot began to sink in...Copy !req
381. they all started grinning.Copy !req
382. They slapped me on the back, cheered me
and danced around the classroom.Copy !req
383. 'We will do it today!' they cried.Copy !req
384. 'We'll do it on the way home.
You had the idea,' they said to me.Copy !req
385. 'So you can be the one who
puts the mouse in the jar."'Copy !req
386. Uh, who belongs to this fish?
- That's mine.Copy !req
387. Could you give me a hand
with these used books?Copy !req
388. And this is her best friend Tacy,
whose real name is Anastasia.Copy !req
389. And the next book, Betsy and Tacy
become friends with Tib...Copy !req
390. whose real name, I am sorry
to tell you, is Thelma.Copy !req
391. Ew.Copy !req
392. The illustrations are hand-tipped.Copy !req
393. And that's why it costs so much?Copy !req
394. That's why it's worth so much.Copy !req
395. I want all of them.Copy !req
396. Uh, I'll think about it.Copy !req
397. That's a lot for your dad
to buy at one time.Copy !req
398. My dad gets me all the books I want.Copy !req
399. That's very nice of him.Copy !req
400. That's not my dad.
That's my nephew.Copy !req
401. I don't really think
that he could be your nephew.Copy !req
402. No, no, no. It's true.Copy !req
403. Annabel is my aunt.
Isn't that right, Aunt Annabel?Copy !req
404. - Uh-huh. And Matt is his—
- Wait, let me guess.Copy !req
405. Are you his uncle?Copy !req
406. No.Copy !req
407. His grandfather?Copy !req
408. His great-grandfather?Copy !req
409. I'm his brother!Copy !req
410. Matt is my father's son.
Annabel is my grandfather's daughter.Copy !req
411. We are...Copy !req
412. an American family.Copy !req
413. Here you go, young lady.Copy !req
414. What's that?
- That's a handkerchief.Copy !req
415. Do children even know
what handkerchiefs are?Copy !req
416. A handkerchief is a Kleenex
that you don't throw away. See?Copy !req
417. My mother embroidered this for me.Copy !req
418. My initials and a daisy, because
daisies are my favorite flower.Copy !req
419. May I ask who you are?Copy !req
420. Kathleen Kelly. I own this store.
And you are?Copy !req
421. Joe. Just call me Joe.Copy !req
422. We'll take these books.Copy !req
423. Okay.Copy !req
424. You're gonna come back, aren't you?Copy !req
425. - Of course.
See?Copy !req
426. That is why we won't go under.
Our customers are loyal.Copy !req
427. They're opening a Fox Books
around the corner.Copy !req
428. - Fox Books! My daddy—
- Likes to buy discount.Copy !req
429. But don't tell anybody.
It's nothing to be proud of.Copy !req
430. F-O-X.Copy !req
431. That's amazing! You can spell "fox."Copy !req
432. Can you spell "dog"?Copy !req
433. F-O-X.Copy !req
434. Look at this dinosaur book.
It's a pop-up dinosaur book.Copy !req
435. Wouldn't you like to have
a dinosaur book like that?Copy !req
436. Wouldn't you like to read that?Copy !req
437. Sit here and read Matt the book
until I take care of things.Copy !req
438. Whatever you do, just don't listen
to anything I say. Thank you.Copy !req
439. We'll take that pop-up book as well.Copy !req
440. The world is not driven by discounts.
I've been in business forever.Copy !req
441. I started helping my mother when I was 6,
and I used to watch her.Copy !req
442. She wasn't just selling books.Copy !req
443. She was helping people become
whatever they were going to be.Copy !req
444. When you read a book as a child,
it becomes part of your identity...Copy !req
445. in a way that no other reading
in your life does.Copy !req
446. And I have gotten carried away.Copy !req
447. Yeah.Copy !req
448. Yeah, you have.Copy !req
449. You've made me feel...Copy !req
450. Enchanting.
Your mother was enchanting.Copy !req
451. Yes, she was.Copy !req
452. - How will you be paying for this?
- Cash.Copy !req
453. How did you know that?Copy !req
454. From the photograph.Copy !req
455. That you in the photograph?
What are you doing?Copy !req
456. Twirling.Copy !req
457. My mother and I used to twirl.Copy !req
458. She left the store to me,
and I'll leave it to my daughter.Copy !req
459. Seventy-three dollars, please.
- How much?Copy !req
460. Uh, 73 dollars.Copy !req
461. Oh. Uh...Copy !req
462. How old is your daughter now?Copy !req
463. I don't have a daughter. Oh!Copy !req
464. I'm not married. But eventually...Copy !req
465. So the big, bad Fox Books
can just go to hell.Copy !req
466. - Here you go.
- Thank you. Hey, we're ready?Copy !req
467. - That's nice.
Bye, Kathleen.Copy !req
468. Goodbye, Annabel. Goodbye, Matt.Copy !req
469. Oh, Matt, I have to ask you another thing.Copy !req
470. Can you spell cat?Copy !req
471. F-O-X.Copy !req
472. Cat. Thanks.Copy !req
473. Good thing it wasn't the fish.Copy !req
474. Take care!Copy !req
475. No protests, no demonstrations.Copy !req
476. The neighborhood loves us.Copy !req
477. They're wondering where
we've been all these years...Copy !req
478. how they did without us.Copy !req
479. It's a hit!Copy !req
480. How's the children's department?Copy !req
481. It's early. School's not out.Copy !req
482. And there is that children's store nearby.
Shop Around the Corner.Copy !req
483. Cecilia's store. Cecilia Kelly.Copy !req
484. We might have had a date once.Copy !req
485. Her daughter owns it now.
We'll crush it.Copy !req
486. She was enchanting.Copy !req
487. They've been open six days.Copy !req
488. And we did $1200 less
than the same week last year.Copy !req
489. That could be a fluke, right?Copy !req
490. Or not.Copy !req
491. Their store is new. It's a novelty.Copy !req
492. It'll all shake out. Meanwhile,
I'm putting up more twinkle lights.Copy !req
493. That's a fine idea.Copy !req
494. What if we have to fold?Copy !req
495. I'll never find another part-time job.Copy !req
496. Then I won't be able to pay my rent,
and I'll have to move.Copy !req
497. To Brooklyn!Copy !req
498. Ah, the joy of rent control.
Six rooms...Copy !req
499. 450 a month.Copy !req
500. We know. You've told us a million times.Copy !req
501. I can't believe you're bringing
this up at a time like this.Copy !req
502. It's like those people who brag
because they're tall.Copy !req
503. We are not going to fold.Copy !req
504. Hey, I—Copy !req
505. This place is a tomb.Copy !req
506. I'm going to the nut shop where it's fun.Copy !req
507. George?Copy !req
508. Miranda!Copy !req
509. Hi! Hi!Copy !req
510. Kathleen, are you surviving?Copy !req
511. We're so excited about your new book.
When should we schedule a signing?Copy !req
512. It's being published in January.
Will you be in business in January?Copy !req
513. I'm so worried.Copy !req
514. We're doing great.Copy !req
515. Aren't we?Copy !req
516. No difference whatsoever!Copy !req
517. Great.Copy !req
518. Thank God!Copy !req
519. You can count on me for anything.
Support, rallies, picket lines.Copy !req
520. We can get the Times to write something.Copy !req
521. Or that nut from the Observer.Copy !req
522. What—?Copy !req
523. - What nut in the Observer?
Frank something-or-other.Copy !req
524. The one who's in love
with his typewriter.Copy !req
525. This is just the sort of thing
that would outrage him.Copy !req
526. A nut? She called me a nut?Copy !req
527. That's not the point.
She thinks my store is in trouble.Copy !req
528. Why would she say that?
There's enough business for us all.Copy !req
529. Yes, there is. No question.
- We are fine.Copy !req
530. You're more than fine.
You're absolutely fine.Copy !req
531. - We are fine.
- Yes.Copy !req
532. How are you?Copy !req
533. - Fine.
- Fine.Copy !req
534. Vince will be so happy to see you.Copy !req
535. Congratulations.
Guess who I saw on the subway today?Copy !req
536. This is amazing. He said:Copy !req
537. "You should go to a retreat.Copy !req
538. You really should go to a retreat."Copy !req
539. Honey, will you get me
another drink? I'm all out.Copy !req
540. "It's a really great place...Copy !req
541. to calm down."Copy !req
542. He said that to me. isn't that hilarious?Copy !req
543. Champagne, please.Copy !req
544. Stoli on the rocks.
But a fresh glass, please.Copy !req
545. White wine, please.Copy !req
546. Here you go.
- Thank you.Copy !req
547. Oh, hello.Copy !req
548. - Hi.
- Hi.Copy !req
549. Do you remember me,
from the bookstore?Copy !req
550. Of course I remember you. Yes.Copy !req
551. How's your aunt?Copy !req
552. She's great. Thanks.Copy !req
553. I'd better go deliver this.Copy !req
554. I have a very thirsty date.
She's part camel.Copy !req
555. Joe, right? Joe, isn't it?Copy !req
556. And you are Kathleen.Copy !req
557. Kathleen Kelly.Copy !req
558. Two white wine, please.Copy !req
559. I cannot believe that
you were speaking to Joe Fox.Copy !req
560. - Joe Fox?
- Joe Fox.Copy !req
561. - As in—
- As in...Copy !req
562. he's gonna take over everything.Copy !req
563. Fox? Your last name is Fox.Copy !req
564. F-O-X.Copy !req
565. God! I didn't realize—Copy !req
566. I didn't know—Copy !req
567. Who you were with?Copy !req
568. I didn't know who you were with.Copy !req
569. Excuse me?Copy !req
570. It's from The Godfather.Copy !req
571. Sorry, it's from The Godfather.Copy !req
572. It's when the movie producer
realizes that Tom Hagen...Copy !req
573. is an emissary of Vito Corleone.Copy !req
574. Just before the horse's head
ends up in the bed...Copy !req
575. with all the bloody sheets.
Wakes up and it's:Copy !req
576. Aah! Aah! Aahh!Copy !req
577. Never mind.Copy !req
578. You were spying on me, weren't you?
You probably rented those children.Copy !req
579. Why would I spy on you?Copy !req
580. Because I am your competition,
which you know...Copy !req
581. or you wouldn't have put up the sign:
"Just around the corner."Copy !req
582. Our store entrance is around the corner.
There's no other way to say it.Copy !req
583. It's not the name of our store.
It's where it is.Copy !req
584. And you do not own the phrase
"around the corner."Copy !req
585. What is that?Copy !req
586. What are you doing?Copy !req
587. What is that? What are you doing?Copy !req
588. You're taking all the caviar?
That caviar is a garnish.Copy !req
589. The reason I came into your store...Copy !req
590. is because I was spending the day
with Annabel and Matt.Copy !req
591. I was buying them presents.Copy !req
592. I'm the type of guy who likes to buy
his way into the hearts of children...Copy !req
593. who are his relatives.Copy !req
594. There was only one place to find
a children's book in the neighborhood.Copy !req
595. That won't always be the case.Copy !req
596. And it was yours. And it is...Copy !req
597. a charming little bookstore.Copy !req
598. You probably sell, what,
$350,000 worth of books in a year?Copy !req
599. How did you know that?Copy !req
600. I'm in the book business.Copy !req
601. I am in the book business.Copy !req
602. I see.Copy !req
603. And we are the Price Club.Copy !req
604. Only instead of a 10-gallon vat
of olive oil for 3.99...Copy !req
605. that won't even fit under your
kitchen cabinet, we sell cheap books.Copy !req
606. Me, a spy? Absolutely.Copy !req
607. I have in my possession the secret
printout of the sales figures...Copy !req
608. of a bookstore so inconsequential,
yet full of its own virtue...Copy !req
609. that I had to rush over for fear
it will put me out of business.Copy !req
610. What? What?Copy !req
611. Hey. How you doing? Frank Navasky.Copy !req
612. Joe Fox.Copy !req
613. - Joe Fox?
- F-O-X.Copy !req
614. The inventor of the superstore.
Of course.Copy !req
615. The enemy of the mid-list novel.Copy !req
616. The destroyer of City Books.Copy !req
617. Tell me something, really.
How do you sleep at night?Copy !req
618. I use a wonderful over-the-counter drug:Copy !req
619. Ultra-dorm.Copy !req
620. Don't take the whole thing, just half.Copy !req
621. You'll wake up without
even the tiniest hangover.Copy !req
622. - You're Frank Navasky, aren't you?
- Yes. Leaving.Copy !req
623. Your last piece in the Observer...Copy !req
624. about Anthony Powell was brilliant.Copy !req
625. - Really?
- Brilliant. Yes.Copy !req
626. I'm Patricia Eden.Copy !req
627. Hi. Eden Books.Copy !req
628. Joe, this man is the greatest
living expert...Copy !req
629. on Julius and Ethel Rosenberg.Copy !req
630. You really liked my—?Copy !req
631. This is Kathleen Kelly.Copy !req
632. My piece? I just—
You know? I'm flattered.Copy !req
633. You write these things.
You think somebody'll mention them.Copy !req
634. A week goes by, the phone
doesn't ring and you think:Copy !req
635. "I'm a fraud. I'm a failure or something."Copy !req
636. You know what fascinated me
about Julius and Ethel Rosenberg?Copy !req
637. Is how old they looked,
when they were really just our age.Copy !req
638. You know?Copy !req
639. Oh, wow, I'm so happy to have
finally met you.Copy !req
640. We will talk. Have you ever
thought about doing a book?Copy !req
641. It's crossed my mind,
something relevant for today...Copy !req
642. like the Luddite movement in
19th century England. We should talk.Copy !req
643. Call me.Copy !req
644. Hon, have you ever had a caviar garnish?Copy !req
645. I had no idea Frank Navasky...Copy !req
646. was going to be so down-to-earth.Copy !req
647. You read his stuff...Copy !req
648. you think he's going to be
so obscure and abstruse.Copy !req
649. He's always talking about Heidegger...Copy !req
650. and Foucault.Copy !req
651. And I have no idea what
any of it's about, really.Copy !req
652. I'm not tired. I'm not.Copy !req
653. Do you ever feel you've become
the worst version of yourself?Copy !req
654. That a Pandora's box of
all the secret, hateful parts...Copy !req
655. your arrogance, your spite...Copy !req
656. your condescension...Copy !req
657. has sprung open?Copy !req
658. Someone provokes you,
and instead of smiling...Copy !req
659. and moving on, you zing them?Copy !req
660. "Hello, it's Mr. Nasty."Copy !req
661. I'm sure you have no idea
what I'm talking about.Copy !req
662. No, I know what you mean,
and I'm completely jealous.Copy !req
663. What happens to me when I'm provoked
is that I get tongue-tied. My mind goes—Copy !req
664. Blank.Copy !req
665. Then I spend all night
tossing and turning...Copy !req
666. trying to figure out
what I should've said.Copy !req
667. What should I have said,
for example, to the...Copy !req
668. Bottom-dweller...Copy !req
669. who recently belittled
my existence?Copy !req
670. Nothing.Copy !req
671. Nothing. Even now.Copy !req
672. Even now—Copy !req
673. Days later...Copy !req
674. —l can't figure it out.Copy !req
675. Wouldn't it be wonderful if I could
pass all my zingers to you?Copy !req
676. Then I'd never behave badly
and you could behave badly all the time.Copy !req
677. And we'd both be happy.Copy !req
678. On the other hand, I must warn you:Copy !req
679. When you finally have the pleasure
of saying the thing you mean to say...Copy !req
680. at the moment you mean to say it,
remorse inevitably follows.Copy !req
681. Do you think we should meet?Copy !req
682. Meet?Copy !req
683. Oh, my God...Copy !req
684. Seventy-two twenty-seven.Copy !req
685. This is a cash-only line.Copy !req
686. - What?
- Cash only.Copy !req
687. Oh, my God. Oh, my God.Copy !req
688. I just have a credit card.
I'm sorry. Is that okay?Copy !req
689. No, it's not okay.Copy !req
690. There's a sign.Copy !req
691. I'm sorry. I'm very sorry.Copy !req
692. I never do this, but I'm asking you to
make an exception in this one case.Copy !req
693. You have no cash?Copy !req
694. - She has no cash.
- No, she has no cash.Copy !req
695. Get on another line, lady.Copy !req
696. I have a dollar. That's all.Copy !req
697. I have a dollar. One dollar.Copy !req
698. - ls there anything you can do?
- Hello.Copy !req
699. - Hello.
- Hi. You need some money?Copy !req
700. No, I do not need any money.
Thank you very much.Copy !req
701. Get in another line.
- Hi.Copy !req
702. Rose.Copy !req
703. That is a great name. Rose.Copy !req
704. This is Kathleen. I'm Joe—Copy !req
705. And I'm Henry.Copy !req
706. Henry, how are you? Happy holidays.Copy !req
707. This is a credit card machine.Copy !req
708. Happy Thanksgiving.Copy !req
709. It's your turn to say
"Happy Thanksgiving" back.Copy !req
710. Happy Thanksgiving back.Copy !req
711. Knock, knock.Copy !req
712. - Who's there?
Orange.Copy !req
713. Orange who?Copy !req
714. "Orange" you going to give us a break...Copy !req
715. by zipping this credit card
through the credit card machine?Copy !req
716. Come on, you can do it.
Zip, zip.Copy !req
717. There you go.Copy !req
718. Rose?Copy !req
719. That is a great name.Copy !req
720. So you're fine.Copy !req
721. Fine.Copy !req
722. Happy Thanksgiving.
Henry, happy Thanksgiving.Copy !req
723. I'm so sorry. Really.Copy !req
724. - I apologize from the bottom of my heart.
So sign already!Copy !req
725. - I'd like to get home for the parade.
You have my pen.Copy !req
726. Wonderful!
Thank you.Copy !req
727. I got it.Copy !req
728. It's coming on Christmas
They're cutting down treesCopy !req
729. Do you know that Joni Mitchell song?Copy !req
730. I wish I had a river
I could skate away onCopy !req
731. Such a sad song. And not
really about Christmas at all.Copy !req
732. But I was thinking about it tonight
as I was decorating my Christmas tree.Copy !req
733. Unwrapping funky ornaments
made of Popsicle sticks...Copy !req
734. and missing my mother so much
I almost couldn't breathe.Copy !req
735. I always miss my mother at Christmas.Copy !req
736. But somehow it is worse this year
since I need some advice from her.Copy !req
737. I need her to make me some cocoa...Copy !req
738. and tell me that everything that's
going badly in my life will sort itself out.Copy !req
739. What kind of advice do you need?
Can I help?Copy !req
740. Can you help?Copy !req
741. I wish you could help.Copy !req
742. I wish...Copy !req
743. I had a gut feeling
you'd be online now.Copy !req
744. Hi.Copy !req
745. I can give you advice.
I'm great at advice.Copy !req
746. Uh-oh.Copy !req
747. If only you could help.Copy !req
748. Hmm.Copy !req
749. Is it about love?Copy !req
750. Please say no.Copy !req
751. No. How cute is that?Copy !req
752. My business is in trouble.Copy !req
753. Huh.Copy !req
754. Well...Copy !req
755. I'm a brilliant businessman.Copy !req
756. It's what I do best.Copy !req
757. What's your business?Copy !req
758. No. Mm-mm.Copy !req
759. No specifics. Remember?Copy !req
760. Okay.Copy !req
761. Well, minus specifics,
it's hard to help except to say...Copy !req
762. go to the mattresses.Copy !req
763. "Except to say go to the matt—"Copy !req
764. What?Copy !req
765. What does that mean?Copy !req
766. It's from The Godfather.
It means you have to go to war.Copy !req
767. What is it with men and The Godfather?Copy !req
768. Hello?Copy !req
769. Oh, come on. Hello?Copy !req
770. Well...Copy !req
771. Well, what can I...Copy !req
772. Michael—Copy !req
773. The Godfather is the I Ching.Copy !req
774. The Godfather is the sum of all wisdom.Copy !req
775. The Godfather is the answer
to any question.Copy !req
776. What should I pack
for my summer vacation?Copy !req
777. "Leave the gun. Take the cannoli."Copy !req
778. What day of the week is it?Copy !req
779. "Monday, Tuesday,
Thursday, Wednesday."Copy !req
780. The answer to your question is:
"Go to the mattresses."Copy !req
781. You're at war.
"It's not personal, it's business.Copy !req
782. It's not personal. It's business."Copy !req
783. Recite that to yourself every time
you feel you're losing your nerve.Copy !req
784. I know you worry about being brave.Copy !req
785. Don't.Copy !req
786. This is your chance.Copy !req
787. Fight!Copy !req
788. Fight to the death!Copy !req
789. Fight to the death.Copy !req
790. It's not personal.
It's business. Just fight!Copy !req
791. Fight, fight, fight!Copy !req
792. Hey.
- Hey.Copy !req
793. I've been thinking.Copy !req
794. - Frank.
- What?Copy !req
795. I've decided to go the mattresses.Copy !req
796. Do you think it would be a conflict of
interest if you wrote about the store?Copy !req
797. - Yes.
- Yes?Copy !req
798. No.Copy !req
799. So you'll do it?Copy !req
800. Yes. Yes.Copy !req
801. Do you know what it is
to go to the mattresses?Copy !req
802. From The Godfather.Copy !req
803. Good morning, Shop Around the Corner.Copy !req
804. George speaking, may I help you?Copy !req
805. Kathleen,
the Channel 2 truck just pulled up.Copy !req
806. In a second.Copy !req
807. Everyone's read the article.Copy !req
808. "So you do not have to look
to the usual places...Copy !req
809. where good and evil face off...Copy !req
810. the places Herodotus called
'the happy land of absolutes.'Copy !req
811. We have the perfect example
here on the West Side...Copy !req
812. where the cold cash cow, Fox Books...Copy !req
813. threatens survival of a temple...Copy !req
814. to one of the twentieth century's
most profound truths:Copy !req
815. You are what you read."Copy !req
816. I believe that.Copy !req
817. "Save The Shop Around the Corner...Copy !req
818. and you will save your soul."Copy !req
819. Frank, that's charming.Copy !req
820. Think it's a little over the top?Copy !req
821. That was The Village Voice.
I told them to come over whenever.Copy !req
822. Oh, man.Copy !req
823. Float like a butterfly. Sting like a bee.Copy !req
824. One, two, three, four!Copy !req
825. We don't want your superstore!Copy !req
826. Five, six, seven, eight!
Go away and close the gate!Copy !req
827. One, two, three, four!Copy !req
828. "We don't want this superstore."Copy !req
829. - Is that what they're saying?
- Catchy.Copy !req
830. - Well, who wrote that?
Annoying.Copy !req
831. Pissing me off, actually.Copy !req
832. Do you want the West Side...Copy !req
833. to become one big, gigantic strip mall?Copy !req
834. No!Copy !req
835. Do you want to get off the subway
at 72nd and Broadway...Copy !req
836. and not even know
you're in New York City?Copy !req
837. Can we save
The Shop Around the Corner?Copy !req
838. Yes!Copy !req
839. We're here in front of
The Shop Around the Corner...Copy !req
840. the famous West Side
children's bookstore...Copy !req
841. now on the verge of having
to close its doors...Copy !req
842. because the big bad wolf,
Fox Books...Copy !req
843. has opened only
a few hundred feet away...Copy !req
844. wooing customers with its sharp
discounts and designer coffee.Copy !req
845. They have to have discounts and lattes...Copy !req
846. because their workers
have never read a book.Copy !req
847. She's not as nice as she seems on TV.Copy !req
848. - You met her?
- Yeah.Copy !req
849. Boy, she's a pill.Copy !req
850. Probably ain't as fine
as she look on TV either.Copy !req
851. Oh, no, no. She's beautiful.
But she's a pill.Copy !req
852. You don't feel bad...Copy !req
853. about sending her ass back
to the projects with food stamps?Copy !req
854. Broke, single, white lady.Copy !req
855. It's not personal.Copy !req
856. - It's business.
- Yeah.Copy !req
857. Hey, here's a good-looking guy!Copy !req
858. I sell cheap books. I do. So sue me.Copy !req
859. And that, in a nutshell,
is the Fox Books philosophy.Copy !req
860. That's what you said?Copy !req
861. Discount them and sell them.Copy !req
862. That's not all I said.Copy !req
863. I can't believe those bastards.
I said we were great!Copy !req
864. I said you could read for hours
and no one will bother you.Copy !req
865. I said we had 150,000 titles. I showed
them the New York City section.Copy !req
866. I said we were a goddamn piazza.Copy !req
867. A place in this city where
people could mingle.Copy !req
868. Piazza?Copy !req
869. I was eloquent!Copy !req
870. - Shit!
- A piazza.Copy !req
871. It's inevitable. People want
to turn her into Joan of Arc.Copy !req
872. And you into Attila the Hun.Copy !req
873. Not me personally,
but the company, yeah.Copy !req
874. I have met Joe Fox.Copy !req
875. I've heard him compare
his store to a Price Club...Copy !req
876. and the books in it
to cans of olive oil.Copy !req
877. The bookstore, tell us about it.Copy !req
878. The Shop Around the Corner has
a kind of Jeffersonian purity to it...Copy !req
879. that the city needs in order
to maintain historical integrity.Copy !req
880. SlDNEY-ANN:
Jeffersonian purity.Copy !req
881. That was nice. Thank you.
Thank you. Sounded good.Copy !req
882. - Are you taping this?
- Yeah, I'm taping this.Copy !req
883. Technologically speaking,
the world's out of hand.Copy !req
884. Take the VCR.Copy !req
885. The whole idea behind the VCR
is that it makes it possible...Copy !req
886. for you to tape what's on TV
when you leave the house.Copy !req
887. The whole idea
behind leaving the house...Copy !req
888. is so you can miss
what's on television.Copy !req
889. - I've heard you say that before.
- She hasn't.Copy !req
890. SlDNEY-ANN:
Absolutely.Copy !req
891. Right.Copy !req
892. She gets it.Copy !req
893. Radio. There's a medium
I can get behind.Copy !req
894. You gonna start collecting radios now?Copy !req
895. SlDNEY-ANN:
We're on television.Copy !req
896. - You're good at it.
- No, no, no.Copy !req
897. Frank.Copy !req
898. She's coming on to you.Copy !req
899. They do this on television.Copy !req
900. The Shop Around the Corner...Copy !req
901. it's a true New York treasure.Copy !req
902. As are you.Copy !req
903. Honestly, I'd love to have you back.Copy !req
904. Is she sweating?Copy !req
905. She's touching herself.
And she's sweating.Copy !req
906. Anytime.Copy !req
907. We can turn it off.Copy !req
908. Oh, my God.Copy !req
909. I just want to say that
yours is the only show I watch.Copy !req
910. Oh, my God.Copy !req
911. No. I was being polite.Copy !req
912. - Thank you, Frank Navasky.
- No, thank you're.Copy !req
913. "Thank you're"? I'm sorry.Copy !req
914. Thank you're?Copy !req
915. Thank you're, ladies and gentlemen.Copy !req
916. I slobbered all over her, didn't l?Copy !req
917. But I think that there's something there.Copy !req
918. So first, I gotta go get
some eucalyptus candles...Copy !req
919. because it makes
my apartment smell mossy.Copy !req
920. Then I'm going to the market,
and I can't decide whether to get...Copy !req
921. sausage for the meat sauce,
or chopped meat.Copy !req
922. Spare us.Copy !req
923. You know what? Clam sauce.Copy !req
924. Because this is a big date.Copy !req
925. Don't tell me.
Not the slightest difference?Copy !req
926. How can that be?Copy !req
927. All this publicity
and not one bit of difference?Copy !req
928. Birdie, what am I going to do?Copy !req
929. What would Mom have done?Copy !req
930. Well, let's ask her.Copy !req
931. Cecilia, what should we do?Copy !req
932. - Birdie?
- Shh.Copy !req
933. She has no idea.Copy !req
934. But she thinks
the window display is lovely.Copy !req
935. - Good night, dearie.
- Good night.Copy !req
936. I need help.Copy !req
937. Do you still want to meet me?Copy !req
938. I would love to meet you.
Where? When?Copy !req
939. So I suppose she's carrying a copy
of a book with a flower in it?Copy !req
940. Not really?Copy !req
941. She could be a real dog, man.Copy !req
942. I'm only staying 10 minutes.Copy !req
943. I'll say hello, have a cup of coffee
and then I'll split.Copy !req
944. Hope she doesn't have a squeaky voice
like the mice in Cinderella.Copy !req
945. Why am I doing this?
Why am I compelled to meet her? Why?Copy !req
946. Relax. You're just taking it
to the next level.Copy !req
947. I always do that.Copy !req
948. I always take a relationship
to the next level.Copy !req
949. If that works out, I take it
to the next level after that.Copy !req
950. Till I reach that level where
it becomes absolutely necessary...Copy !req
951. for me to leave.Copy !req
952. Huh. I won't stay that long anyway.
I already said that, didn't l?Copy !req
953. - Yes, you did.
- Oh!Copy !req
954. Well, okay. Café Lalo. This is it.Copy !req
955. Eight o'clock.
We got here fast, didn't we?Copy !req
956. Kevin...Copy !req
957. this woman is the most adorable creature
I've ever been in contact with.Copy !req
958. If she turns out even to be
as good-looking as a mailbox...Copy !req
959. I'd be crazy not to turn my life
upside down and marry her.Copy !req
960. She could be a real dog.Copy !req
961. But good luck.Copy !req
962. Would you go and look for me?Copy !req
963. Go look through the window
and check her out. Please?Copy !req
964. All right.Copy !req
965. - You're pathetic, man.
- Ha-ha-ha.Copy !req
966. All right. I'll see what I see.Copy !req
967. You see her?Copy !req
968. Oh, wait, yeah.Copy !req
969. I see a very beautiful girl.Copy !req
970. She's fine. She's fine.Copy !req
971. - I knew it.
- She's gorgeous.Copy !req
972. I knew she would be.Copy !req
973. But no book.Copy !req
974. All right. Okay, wait. Wait a minute.Copy !req
975. There's a book with a flower.
So this got to be her.Copy !req
976. What does she look like?Copy !req
977. Can't see. Waiter's blocking.Copy !req
978. Damn it!Copy !req
979. Hold on, he's moving.Copy !req
980. - Yeah?
- Uh...Copy !req
981. Can you see her?Copy !req
982. Can you see her?Copy !req
983. Yeah.Copy !req
984. And?Copy !req
985. She's very pretty.Copy !req
986. She is!Copy !req
987. I knew she would be! She had to be!Copy !req
988. She had to be!Copy !req
989. You know what?Copy !req
990. She look—Copy !req
991. I mean, she almost has
the same coloring as...Copy !req
992. - ... that Kathleen Kelly person.
- Kathleen Kelly of the bookstore?Copy !req
993. Why not? You thought she was attractive.Copy !req
994. Absolutely. Why not?
Who cares about Kathleen Kelly?Copy !req
995. Well, if you don't like Kathleen Kelly...Copy !req
996. I can tell you right now...Copy !req
997. you ain't gonna like this girl.Copy !req
998. Why not?Copy !req
999. Because it is Kathleen Kelly.Copy !req
1000. What are you going to do?Copy !req
1001. Nothing.Copy !req
1002. You just gonna let her
wait there all night?Copy !req
1003. That's exactly what I'm going to do.Copy !req
1004. Good night. I'll see you in the morning.Copy !req
1005. Do you mind if I borrow this chair?Copy !req
1006. Yes, I mind. Sorry.Copy !req
1007. I'm expecting someone.Copy !req
1008. Would you like another tea?Copy !req
1009. Yes. Thank you.Copy !req
1010. Kathleen Kelly.Copy !req
1011. Hello. This is a coincidence.
Would you mind if I sat down?Copy !req
1012. Yes, I would, actually.
I'm expecting someone.Copy !req
1013. Pride and Prejudice.Copy !req
1014. Do you mind?Copy !req
1015. I bet you read that book every year.
I bet you just love that...Copy !req
1016. Mr. Darcy.Copy !req
1017. Your sentimental heart beats wildly
at the thought he and...Copy !req
1018. whatever her name is are truly,
honestly going to end up together.Copy !req
1019. Can I get you something?
- No, he's not staying.Copy !req
1020. Mochaccino decaf, nonfat.Copy !req
1021. You are not staying.Copy !req
1022. I'll just stay here
until your friend gets here.Copy !req
1023. Gee, is he late?Copy !req
1024. The heroine of Pride and Prejudice
is Elizabeth Bennet.Copy !req
1025. She is a great and complex character.
Not that you would know.Copy !req
1026. As a matter of fact, I've read it.Copy !req
1027. Oh, well, good for you.Copy !req
1028. You'd discover a lot
if you really knew me.Copy !req
1029. I know what I'd find.Copy !req
1030. Instead of a brain, a cash register.
Instead of a heart, a bottom line.Copy !req
1031. What?Copy !req
1032. - I just had a breakthrough.
- What is it?Copy !req
1033. For the first time, when confronted
with a horrible, insensitive person...Copy !req
1034. I knew exactly what I
wanted to say, and I said it.Copy !req
1035. You have a gift for it. That was a
perfect blend of poetry and meanness.Copy !req
1036. Meanness?
Let me tell you about meanness.Copy !req
1037. Don't misunderstand me.
I'm trying to pay you a compliment.Copy !req
1038. - What are you doing?
- What is this?Copy !req
1039. Is this a red rose?
No, it's a crimson rose.Copy !req
1040. Something you read about in a book.Copy !req
1041. It's funny to you, isn't it?
Everything is a joke to you.Copy !req
1042. Please leave.Copy !req
1043. Please leave, I beg you.Copy !req
1044. Thank you.Copy !req
1045. That hanky reminds me
of the first day I met you.Copy !req
1046. First day you lied to me.Copy !req
1047. - I didn't lie to you.
- You did too.Copy !req
1048. - No, I didn't.
- Yes, you did.Copy !req
1049. - I did not.
- You did too.Copy !req
1050. I thought that Fox stuff
was so charming. F-O-X.Copy !req
1051. I didn't lie about it.Copy !req
1052. - Joe? "Just call me Joe."
- Sure.Copy !req
1053. As if you were a stupid
22-year-old girl with no last name.Copy !req
1054. "Hi, I'm Kimberly."
"Hi, I'm Janice."Copy !req
1055. Don't they know you're
supposed to have a last name?Copy !req
1056. It's like an entire generation
of cocktail waitresses.Copy !req
1057. Look.Copy !req
1058. - I am not a 22-year-old cocktail waitress.
- That's not what I meant.Copy !req
1059. When I said the thing about
the Price Club and olive oil...Copy !req
1060. that's not what I meant.Copy !req
1061. You poor, sad multimillionaire.
I feel so sorry for you.Copy !req
1062. I'll take a wild guess
that's not him, either.Copy !req
1063. So who is he, I wonder?Copy !req
1064. Certainly not
the world's greatest expert...Copy !req
1065. on Julius and Ethel Rosenberg.Copy !req
1066. But somebody else entirely different.Copy !req
1067. Will you be mean to him too?Copy !req
1068. No, I will not.Copy !req
1069. The man who is coming here
is completely unlike you.Copy !req
1070. The man who is coming here
is kind and funny.Copy !req
1071. He's got a wonderful sense of humor.Copy !req
1072. But...Copy !req
1073. he's not here.Copy !req
1074. If he's not, he has a reason...Copy !req
1075. because there is not a cruel
or careless bone in his body.Copy !req
1076. I wouldn't expect you to understand
anybody like that.Copy !req
1077. You with your theme park, multi-level,
homogenize-the-world Mochaccinoland.Copy !req
1078. You've deluded yourself that you're a
benefactor bringing books to the masses.Copy !req
1079. But no one will ever
remember you, Joe Fox.Copy !req
1080. And maybe no one will remember me.Copy !req
1081. But plenty of people
remember my mother.Copy !req
1082. They think she was fine.Copy !req
1083. They think her store
was something special.Copy !req
1084. You are nothing but a suit.Copy !req
1085. That's my cue.Copy !req
1086. Good night.Copy !req
1087. So then the agent asks
for $600,000 and I said to her:Copy !req
1088. "If you think I'm even
going to talk to you...Copy !req
1089. about paying that kind
of advance for an author...Copy !req
1090. whose last book is being used
as a trivet all over the world...Copy !req
1091. you are completely crazy."Copy !req
1092. She was insulting and provocative
and the only thing pleasant about her...Copy !req
1093. was the way her hair
fell across her forehead.Copy !req
1094. Underneath that disagreeable
exterior, she may be—Copy !req
1095. A real bitch.Copy !req
1096. Let's not talk about it.Copy !req
1097. I'm going back to the office
and I'm sure you have work to do.Copy !req
1098. Not really.Copy !req
1099. This place is a well-oiled machine,
my friend.Copy !req
1100. So? What happened?Copy !req
1101. - He never came.
- He stood you up.Copy !req
1102. I wouldn't characterize it that way.Copy !req
1103. I think something happened.Copy !req
1104. Something unexpected that
made it impossible for him to...Copy !req
1105. What if he showed up,
took one look at me and left?Copy !req
1106. Not possible.Copy !req
1107. Maybe there was a subway accident.Copy !req
1108. Absolutely.Copy !req
1109. A train got trapped underground
with him inside.Copy !req
1110. And no phone.Copy !req
1111. You know how those
express trains create suction.Copy !req
1112. He got sucked onto the tracks.Copy !req
1113. The third rail.Copy !req
1114. He's toast.Copy !req
1115. What happened?Copy !req
1116. He was unable to make it.Copy !req
1117. He stood you up?Copy !req
1118. Maybe he had a car accident.
Those cab drivers are maniacs.Copy !req
1119. They hit something and you slam
into that plastic partition.Copy !req
1120. Or his elbows could be in splints,
so he couldn't dial.Copy !req
1121. Or he could be unconscious.Copy !req
1122. In a coma.Copy !req
1123. Stuck in intensive care.Copy !req
1124. With a heart monitor beeping.Copy !req
1125. And like...Copy !req
1126. - No phone.
- No phone.Copy !req
1127. What?Copy !req
1128. What are you saying?Copy !req
1129. It could be.Copy !req
1130. He was arrested
two blocks from the café.Copy !req
1131. Is there a picture?Copy !req
1132. So that explains it.Copy !req
1133. He was in jail.Copy !req
1134. And there was a phone.Copy !req
1135. He only got one call,
so he called his lawyer.Copy !req
1136. You are so lucky.Copy !req
1137. You could be dead.Copy !req
1138. He couldn't be the Rooftop Killer.Copy !req
1139. Remember when you thought
Frank might be the Unabomber?Copy !req
1140. Well... That was different.Copy !req
1141. How long did you sit there all alone?Copy !req
1142. - Not long. Joe Fox came in.
- Joe Fox?Copy !req
1143. I don't want to talk about it.
Let's get to work.Copy !req
1144. There's got to be something to do.
There's always something to do.Copy !req
1145. Look at this.
He looks kind of cute.Copy !req
1146. So?Copy !req
1147. He was unavoidably detained.Copy !req
1148. He stood you up?Copy !req
1149. I've been thinking about you.Copy !req
1150. Last night I went to meet you,
and you weren't there.Copy !req
1151. I wish I knew why. I felt so foolish.Copy !req
1152. And as I waited,
someone else showed up.Copy !req
1153. A man who has made
my professional life a misery.Copy !req
1154. And an amazing thing happened.Copy !req
1155. I was able, for the first time...Copy !req
1156. to say the exact thing
I wanted to say...Copy !req
1157. at the exact moment
I wanted to say it.Copy !req
1158. And of course, afterwards I felt terrible...Copy !req
1159. just as you said I would.Copy !req
1160. I was cruel, and I'm never cruel.Copy !req
1161. Though I hardly believe
what I said mattered to this man.Copy !req
1162. To him, I am just a bug to be crushed.Copy !req
1163. But what if it did?Copy !req
1164. No matter what he's done to me,
there is no excuse for my behavior.Copy !req
1165. Anyway...Copy !req
1166. I so wanted to talk to you.Copy !req
1167. I hope you have a good reason
for not being there last night.Copy !req
1168. You don't seem like the kind of person
who'd do something like that.Copy !req
1169. The odd thing about this
form of communication...Copy !req
1170. is that you're more likely to talk
about nothing than something.Copy !req
1171. But I just want to say...Copy !req
1172. that all this nothing has meant
more to me than so many...Copy !req
1173. somethings.Copy !req
1174. So thanks.Copy !req
1175. Goodbye.Copy !req
1176. I am in...Copy !req
1177. Vancouver.Copy !req
1178. I was stuck in a meeting
which I couldn't get out of...Copy !req
1179. and...Copy !req
1180. the electricity went out.Copy !req
1181. And...Copy !req
1182. we were trapped...Copy !req
1183. on the 38th floor.Copy !req
1184. And the telephone system blew too.Copy !req
1185. Amazingly enough.Copy !req
1186. Dear friend:Copy !req
1187. I cannot tell you
what happened last night.Copy !req
1188. But I beg you
from the bottom of my heart...Copy !req
1189. to forgive me for not being there.Copy !req
1190. For what happened.Copy !req
1191. I feel terrible that you
found yourself in a situation...Copy !req
1192. that caused you additional pain.Copy !req
1193. But I'm absolutely sure...Copy !req
1194. that whatever you said last night
was provoked.Copy !req
1195. Even deserved.Copy !req
1196. Everyone says things they regret
when they're worried or stressed.Copy !req
1197. You were expecting to see
someone you trusted...Copy !req
1198. and met the enemy instead.Copy !req
1199. The fault is mine.Copy !req
1200. Someday I'll explain everything.Copy !req
1201. Meanwhile...Copy !req
1202. I'm still here.Copy !req
1203. Talk to me.Copy !req
1204. Did he say anything about
wanting to meet you again?Copy !req
1205. No, not really.Copy !req
1206. Listen, it doesn't matter.Copy !req
1207. We'll just be like George Bernard Shaw
and Mrs. Patrick Campbell.Copy !req
1208. We'll write letters our whole lives.Copy !req
1209. Thank you for the scones.
They look lovely.Copy !req
1210. Birdie, where was this one taken?Copy !req
1211. Seville.Copy !req
1212. When you fell madly in love?
Yes.Copy !req
1213. So, dearie, what have you decided to do?Copy !req
1214. Close. We're going to close.Copy !req
1215. Close.Copy !req
1216. Closing the store is the brave thing to do.Copy !req
1217. You are such a liar. But thank you.Copy !req
1218. You are daring to imagine that
you could have a different life.Copy !req
1219. I know it doesn't feel like that.
You feel like a big, fat failure now.Copy !req
1220. But you're not.Copy !req
1221. You are marching into
the unknown, armed with...Copy !req
1222. nothing.Copy !req
1223. Have a sandwich.Copy !req
1224. Not nothing. I have a little money saved.Copy !req
1225. If you need more, ask me. I'm very rich.Copy !req
1226. I bought lntel at six.Copy !req
1227. I suppose you want me
to tell you who it was...Copy !req
1228. I fell madly in love with.Copy !req
1229. But I'm not going to tell.Copy !req
1230. Who was it, Birdie?Copy !req
1231. Come on, tell. Uch. That's so mean.Copy !req
1232. But so romantic.Copy !req
1233. It wasn't meant to be.
- Why not?Copy !req
1234. He ran Spain.Copy !req
1235. Spain?Copy !req
1236. The country, he ran it. It was his job.Copy !req
1237. And then he died.Copy !req
1238. Just as well.Copy !req
1239. Milk or lemon?Copy !req
1240. She fell in love with
Generalissimo Franco.Copy !req
1241. Don't say that.
We don't know that for sure.Copy !req
1242. Who else could it have been?
It was around 1960.Copy !req
1243. - Do you want some popcorn?
- I can't believe this.Copy !req
1244. It's not like he was something normal,
like a socialist or an anarchist.Copy !req
1245. It happened in Spain.Copy !req
1246. People do stupid things
in foreign countries.Copy !req
1247. They buy leather jackets
for much more than they're worth.Copy !req
1248. But they don't fall in love
with fascist dictators.Copy !req
1249. Birdie is a very special person to me.Copy !req
1250. She is practically my surrogate mother.Copy !req
1251. She's out of her mind.Copy !req
1252. She is not.Copy !req
1253. I could never be with anybody who
doesn't take politics as seriously as I do.Copy !req
1254. Do you mind?Copy !req
1255. A hot dog is singing.Copy !req
1256. You need quiet
while a hot dog is singing?Copy !req
1257. I have something to tell you, Frank.Copy !req
1258. - I didn't vote.
- What?Copy !req
1259. In the last mayoral election...Copy !req
1260. when Rudy Giuliani was running
against Ruth Messinger...Copy !req
1261. I went to get a manicure.Copy !req
1262. And forgot to vote.Copy !req
1263. Since when do you get manicures?Copy !req
1264. I suppose you could never be with
a woman who got manicures?Copy !req
1265. It's okay. I forgive you.Copy !req
1266. You forgive me?Copy !req
1267. Excuse me, I'm sorry. Excuse me.Copy !req
1268. This has been a big week.
You're closing the store.Copy !req
1269. No, it's not that. Really, it's not.Copy !req
1270. I know, I know. That was terrible of me.Copy !req
1271. What was terrible?Copy !req
1272. Jumping all over you when I'm the one...Copy !req
1273. I don't even know how to say this.Copy !req
1274. What is it?Copy !req
1275. What?Copy !req
1276. You're a wonderful person.Copy !req
1277. So are you.Copy !req
1278. And I'm so honored that
you'd want to be with me...Copy !req
1279. because you wouldn't be with
anyone who wasn't truly worthy.Copy !req
1280. - I feel exactly the same way.
- No, God, don't—Copy !req
1281. Don't say that.
That makes it worse.Copy !req
1282. What?Copy !req
1283. You don't love me.Copy !req
1284. Me either.Copy !req
1285. You don't love me?Copy !req
1286. No.Copy !req
1287. But we're so right for each other.Copy !req
1288. I know. I know.Copy !req
1289. Well, is there someone else?Copy !req
1290. Oh. That woman on television,
Sidney Ann.Copy !req
1291. Uh... Nothing has happened, but...Copy !req
1292. Is she a Republican?Copy !req
1293. I can't help myself.Copy !req
1294. What about you? Is there someone else?Copy !req
1295. No.Copy !req
1296. No, but...Copy !req
1297. But there is the dream of someone else.Copy !req
1298. Grab a copy of The Trumpet of the Swan.Copy !req
1299. This is a tragedy.Copy !req
1300. These chairs for sale?
Anything not nailed down.Copy !req
1301. Ten dollars, it's yours.Copy !req
1302. What are you going to do now?Copy !req
1303. I don't know. I think I'll take some time.
I'm almost looking forward to it.Copy !req
1304. Good luck to you.Copy !req
1305. I came here every Saturday
when I was a little girl.Copy !req
1306. I remember when your mother
gave me Anne of Green Gables.Copy !req
1307. "Read it with a box of Kleenex"...Copy !req
1308. she told me.Copy !req
1309. Could someone help me?Copy !req
1310. She's looking down on you now.Copy !req
1311. I'm sure she is.Copy !req
1312. Why don't we bomb Fox Books?Copy !req
1313. Do you have the "shoe" books?Copy !req
1314. The shoe books?Copy !req
1315. Who's the author?Copy !req
1316. I don't know.Copy !req
1317. My friend told me my daughter has to
read the shoe books, so here I am.Copy !req
1318. Noel Streafteild.Copy !req
1319. Noel Streafteild wrote
Ballet Shoes and Skating Shoes...Copy !req
1320. and Theatre Shoes...Copy !req
1321. and Dancing Shoes and...Copy !req
1322. I'd start with Ballet Shoes first.
It's my favorite.Copy !req
1323. Although Skating Shoes
is completely wonderful.Copy !req
1324. But it's out of print.Copy !req
1325. Streafteild. How do you spell that?Copy !req
1326. S-T-R-E-A-T-F-E-l-L-D.Copy !req
1327. Thank you.Copy !req
1328. Kathleen Kelly.
It was like her name was in the air.Copy !req
1329. Just like that?Copy !req
1330. Everyone was talking about her today.Copy !req
1331. Kathleen Kelly and her "situation."Copy !req
1332. And I was thinking that she'd make
a great children's book editor.Copy !req
1333. What makes you think that?Copy !req
1334. Well, she knows everything.Copy !req
1335. She has flawless taste.
She's famous for it.Copy !req
1336. Salesmen swear by her.
If she likes the book, it sells. Period.Copy !req
1337. You're going to offer her a job?Copy !req
1338. What else has she got to do?Copy !req
1339. - Now that she's destitute.
- Thanks to you.Copy !req
1340. - I don't see her working for you.
- Why not?Copy !req
1341. She lacks the killer instinct.Copy !req
1342. She's never fired anybody.
Look at that little shop.Copy !req
1343. Those people have been there forever.Copy !req
1344. Till recently, when they all lost their jobs.Copy !req
1345. Thanks to you.Copy !req
1346. Hold the elevator!Copy !req
1347. Missy. Mr. Fox.Copy !req
1348. Hello, Charlie.Copy !req
1349. I love how you've forgotten you had
any role in her current situation.Copy !req
1350. It's so obtuse.Copy !req
1351. It's so insensitive.Copy !req
1352. Reminds me of someone.Copy !req
1353. Who does it remind me of?Copy !req
1354. Me.Copy !req
1355. What is going on?Copy !req
1356. Could be stuck.Copy !req
1357. What are you doing?Copy !req
1358. I hope this thing doesn't plummet
to the basement.Copy !req
1359. - Can it do that?
- No.Copy !req
1360. It cannot plummet to the basement.Copy !req
1361. Hi, this is Joe Fox. Who's this? Juan?Copy !req
1362. We are stuck in the elevator
between the sixth and seventh floor.Copy !req
1363. There's four of us.Copy !req
1364. And if you don't get your ass
up here in two shakes...Copy !req
1365. and get us the hell out of here—!Copy !req
1366. Juan? Yeah.Copy !req
1367. Listen.Copy !req
1368. Call the super and then 9-1 -1.Copy !req
1369. 9-1 -1.Copy !req
1370. The fire department, that's right.Copy !req
1371. Thank you very much.Copy !req
1372. - Everyone should jump in the air.
- What?Copy !req
1373. We jump.Copy !req
1374. The elevator thinks no one is here
and it opens.Copy !req
1375. One, two, three. Jump!Copy !req
1376. If I ever get out of here...Copy !req
1377. I'm going to start speaking
to my mama.Copy !req
1378. Wonder what she's doing
right this very minute?Copy !req
1379. If I ever get out of here...Copy !req
1380. I'm marrying Orit.Copy !req
1381. I love her.Copy !req
1382. I should marry her.
I don't know what's been stopping me.Copy !req
1383. If I ever get out of here,
I'm having my eyes lasered.Copy !req
1384. If I ever get out of here—Copy !req
1385. Where are my Tic-Tacs? Ugh!Copy !req
1386. What?Copy !req
1387. I came home tonight and got into
the elevator to go to my apartment.Copy !req
1388. An hour later, I got out of the elevator...Copy !req
1389. and Brinkley and I moved out.Copy !req
1390. Suddenly everything had become clear.Copy !req
1391. It's a long story...Copy !req
1392. full of the personal details
we avoid so carefully.Copy !req
1393. Let me just say...Copy !req
1394. there was a man sitting
in the elevator with me...Copy !req
1395. who knew exactly what he wanted.Copy !req
1396. And I found myself wishing
I were as lucky as he.Copy !req
1397. People are always telling you
that change is a good thing.Copy !req
1398. But all they're saying is that something
you didn't want to happen at all...Copy !req
1399. has happened.Copy !req
1400. My store is closing this week.Copy !req
1401. I own a store. Did I ever tell you that?Copy !req
1402. It's a lovely store.Copy !req
1403. In a week it will be
something depressing...Copy !req
1404. like a Baby Gap.Copy !req
1405. Soon we'll just be a memory.Copy !req
1406. In fact, some foolish person will
probably think it's a tribute to this city.Copy !req
1407. The way it keeps changing on you,
or the way you can never count on it.Copy !req
1408. I know because that's
the sort of thing I'd say.Copy !req
1409. But the truth is...Copy !req
1410. I'm heartbroken.Copy !req
1411. I feel as if a part of me has died...Copy !req
1412. and my mother has died all over again.Copy !req
1413. And no one can ever make it right.Copy !req
1414. What happened?Copy !req
1415. Oh, hell.Copy !req
1416. How are you?Copy !req
1417. You know, Dad, you did pretty well.
At least you didn't marry her.Copy !req
1418. Welcome aboard.Copy !req
1419. - It lasted a while.
- Yeah.Copy !req
1420. You know...Copy !req
1421. I've stayed on this boat after—Copy !req
1422. Let's see.Copy !req
1423. Your mother.Copy !req
1424. Laurette, the ballet dancer.Copy !req
1425. My nanny.Copy !req
1426. She was the nanny?Copy !req
1427. Yeah.Copy !req
1428. I forgot that.Copy !req
1429. How ironic.Copy !req
1430. Then there was the ice skater.Copy !req
1431. - Also my nanny.
- Really?Copy !req
1432. Yeah.Copy !req
1433. That's amazingly ironic.Copy !req
1434. And then there was Sybil, the, um...Copy !req
1435. - It's an "A" word.
- Astrologer.Copy !req
1436. Exactly.Copy !req
1437. Whose moon turned out to be
in someone else's house.Copy !req
1438. Just like Gillian.Copy !req
1439. - Gillian ran off with someone?
- The nanny.Copy !req
1440. - Nanny Maureen?
- Yes.Copy !req
1441. Gillian ran off with Nanny Maureen.Copy !req
1442. You got it.Copy !req
1443. It's incredibly ironic.Copy !req
1444. - That's true.
- No other word for it.Copy !req
1445. Well, who's better than us?Copy !req
1446. Father and son, together at last.Copy !req
1447. Who did you say you broke up with?Copy !req
1448. Patricia.Copy !req
1449. You met her.Copy !req
1450. Would I like her?Copy !req
1451. Just kidding, son.Copy !req
1452. Now, is this beautiful or what?Copy !req
1453. Of course, I'll be living out of a suitcase
for at least three weeks.Copy !req
1454. And then there's
the inevitable legal hassle.Copy !req
1455. More of your inheritance down the drain.Copy !req
1456. - Don't worry about it.
- I won't.Copy !req
1457. I just have to meet someone new.
That's the easy part.Copy !req
1458. Right, yeah.Copy !req
1459. A snap to find the one person in the world
who fills your heart with joy.Copy !req
1460. Don't be ridiculous.Copy !req
1461. Have I ever been with anybody
who fit that description?Copy !req
1462. Have you?Copy !req
1463. Who is it?Copy !req
1464. It's Joe Fox.Copy !req
1465. What are you doing here?Copy !req
1466. - Uh, may I please come up?
- No, I don't—Copy !req
1467. No, I don't really think that
that is a good idea, because...Copy !req
1468. I have a...Copy !req
1469. I have a terrible...Copy !req
1470. cold.Copy !req
1471. - Can you hear that?
- Yeah.Copy !req
1472. I'm sniffling,
and I'm not really awake.Copy !req
1473. I'm taking echinacea and vitamin C
and sleeping practically...Copy !req
1474. 24 hours a day. I have a temperature.Copy !req
1475. And I think I'm contagious.
So I would—Copy !req
1476. I would really appreciate it
if you'd just go away.Copy !req
1477. Kathleen?Copy !req
1478. Uh...Copy !req
1479. Uh, just a second!Copy !req
1480. Yes, just a second.Copy !req
1481. - Hello.
- Hello.Copy !req
1482. What are you doing here?Copy !req
1483. I heard you were sick.Copy !req
1484. And I was worried.Copy !req
1485. And I wanted to make sure...Copy !req
1486. What?Copy !req
1487. - ls there somebody here?
- No.Copy !req
1488. Oh. It's the Home Shopping Network.Copy !req
1489. You buy any of those
little porcelain dolls?Copy !req
1490. I was thinking about it.Copy !req
1491. - You put me out of business.
- Yes, I did.Copy !req
1492. - Did you come to gloat?
- No.Copy !req
1493. - To offer me a job?
- I would never—Copy !req
1494. I have plenty of offers.
I got offered a job by—Copy !req
1495. - By my former...
- Your former?Copy !req
1496. We broke up.Copy !req
1497. That's too bad.
You were so perfect for each other.Copy !req
1498. Oh.Copy !req
1499. I don't mean to say things like that.
No matter what you've done...Copy !req
1500. there's no excuse for my saying that.Copy !req
1501. Every time I see you—Copy !req
1502. Things like that just
fly out of your mouth.Copy !req
1503. I brought you flowers.Copy !req
1504. Ohh.Copy !req
1505. Thank you.Copy !req
1506. Why don't I just put these in some water?Copy !req
1507. You're sick. You should sit down.Copy !req
1508. I need a vase.Copy !req
1509. Above the refrigerator.Copy !req
1510. There it is. Obviously.Copy !req
1511. George says hello, by the way.Copy !req
1512. He told me you were sick.Copy !req
1513. How is George?Copy !req
1514. Great, really great.Copy !req
1515. He's revolutionizing the place.Copy !req
1516. You can't work in his department...Copy !req
1517. unless you have a Ph.D.
in Children's Literature.Copy !req
1518. I love daisies.Copy !req
1519. - You told me.
- They're so friendly.Copy !req
1520. Don't you think daisies
are the friendliest flower?Copy !req
1521. I do.Copy !req
1522. When did you break up?Copy !req
1523. Couple of weeks ago.Copy !req
1524. Everyone is breaking up. You. Me.Copy !req
1525. This other person I know broke up
with someone in an elevator.Copy !req
1526. Or after it, or just outside it or...Copy !req
1527. It got stuck.Copy !req
1528. When I saw you at the coffee place,
I was waiting for him.Copy !req
1529. And I was...Copy !req
1530. Charming.Copy !req
1531. I was not charming.Copy !req
1532. You looked charming. Tea?Copy !req
1533. Yes. I was...Copy !req
1534. I was upset and horrible.Copy !req
1535. Honey?
- Yes.Copy !req
1536. I was the horrible one.Copy !req
1537. Well, that's true.Copy !req
1538. But I have no excuse.Copy !req
1539. Oh, I see what you're saying.Copy !req
1540. That's interesting.Copy !req
1541. Whereas I am a horrible person...Copy !req
1542. therefore I have no choice
but to be horrible.Copy !req
1543. That's what you're saying.
But that's all right.Copy !req
1544. I put you out of business so...Copy !req
1545. you're entitled to hate me.Copy !req
1546. I don't hate you.Copy !req
1547. But you'll never forgive me.Copy !req
1548. - Just like Elizabeth.
- Who?Copy !req
1549. Elizabeth Bennet in Pride and Prejudice.Copy !req
1550. She was too proud.Copy !req
1551. I thought you hated Pride and Prejudice.Copy !req
1552. Or was she too prejudiced...Copy !req
1553. and Mr. Darcy is too proud?Copy !req
1554. I can't remember.Copy !req
1555. It wasn't personal.Copy !req
1556. What is that supposed to mean?
I'm so sick of that.Copy !req
1557. All that means is that
it wasn't personal to you.Copy !req
1558. But it was personal to me.Copy !req
1559. It's personal to a lot of people.Copy !req
1560. What is so wrong
with being personal anyway?Copy !req
1561. Nothing.Copy !req
1562. Whatever else anything is,
it ought to begin by being personal.Copy !req
1563. My head is starting to get fuzzy.Copy !req
1564. Why did you stop by again? I forget.Copy !req
1565. I wanted to be your friend.Copy !req
1566. Oh.Copy !req
1567. I knew it wasn't possible.Copy !req
1568. Sometimes a guy
just wants the impossible.Copy !req
1569. Can I ask you a question?Copy !req
1570. What?Copy !req
1571. What happened with that guy
at the café?Copy !req
1572. Nothing.Copy !req
1573. But you're crazy about him?Copy !req
1574. Yes, I am.Copy !req
1575. Why don't you run off with him?
What are you waiting for?Copy !req
1576. I don't actually know him.Copy !req
1577. Really?Copy !req
1578. I only know him through...Copy !req
1579. You won't believe this.Copy !req
1580. Let me guess.Copy !req
1581. Through the Internet?Copy !req
1582. Yes.Copy !req
1583. Hmm.Copy !req
1584. "You've got mail."Copy !req
1585. Yes.Copy !req
1586. Those are very powerful words.Copy !req
1587. Yes.Copy !req
1588. I'm happy for him.Copy !req
1589. Although...Copy !req
1590. Could I just make a suggestion?Copy !req
1591. What?Copy !req
1592. I think...Copy !req
1593. you should meet him.Copy !req
1594. No, wait, I take that back.Copy !req
1595. Why would you meet somebody
you're crazy about?Copy !req
1596. I hardly think I need to take advice
from a person who—Copy !req
1597. I can see I bring out the worst in you.Copy !req
1598. Let me help you to not say something...Copy !req
1599. you'll torture yourself about
for years to come.Copy !req
1600. I hope you feel better soon.Copy !req
1601. It'd be a shame to miss New York
in the spring.Copy !req
1602. Thank you for the daisies.Copy !req
1603. Well, you take care.Copy !req
1604. I will.Copy !req
1605. Goodbye.Copy !req
1606. I've been thinking about this...Copy !req
1607. and I think we should meet.Copy !req
1608. We should meet.Copy !req
1609. And we will meet.Copy !req
1610. But I'm in the middle
of a project that needs...Copy !req
1611. tweaking.Copy !req
1612. Some tweaking?Copy !req
1613. A project that needed...Copy !req
1614. "tweaking."Copy !req
1615. - Yeah, that's what he said.
- T-W-E-A-K-I-N-G? Tweaking.Copy !req
1616. It sounds to me like he's married.Copy !req
1617. Three kids.Copy !req
1618. That's a terrible thing to say.
He couldn't be married.Copy !req
1619. How do you know?Copy !req
1620. Have you said, "Are you married?"Copy !req
1621. No, I'm not going to— No.Copy !req
1622. I know this is a little late
to be asking but...Copy !req
1623. are you married?Copy !req
1624. Am I married?Copy !req
1625. What kind of question is that?Copy !req
1626. How can you ask me that?
Don't you know me at all?Copy !req
1627. Oh, wait, I get it.Copy !req
1628. Your friends are saying the reason
we haven't met is I'm married.Copy !req
1629. Am I right?Copy !req
1630. - So he didn't answer the question.
- Yes, he did.Copy !req
1631. - He did not.
- He did. He did. He nailed me.Copy !req
1632. He knew what I was after which is,
by the way, exactly like him.Copy !req
1633. He did not answer the question, did he?Copy !req
1634. No.Copy !req
1635. Maybe he's fat.Copy !req
1636. He's fat. He's a fatty.Copy !req
1637. I don't care.Copy !req
1638. You don't care that he's so fat...Copy !req
1639. he has to be removed from his house
by a crane. You don't care.Copy !req
1640. That is very unlikely.Copy !req
1641. That is completely ridiculous.Copy !req
1642. What's his handle?Copy !req
1643. Uh...Copy !req
1644. I'm not going to write him.Copy !req
1645. You think I'm going to e-mail him?Copy !req
1646. All right, N-Y-1 -5-2.Copy !req
1647. N-Y-1 -5-2? 152.Copy !req
1648. He's 152 years old.Copy !req
1649. He's had 152 moles removed...Copy !req
1650. so now he's got
152 pockmarks on his...Copy !req
1651. On his face.Copy !req
1652. The number of people who think
he looks like Clark Gable.Copy !req
1653. 152 people who think
he looks like a Clark Bar.Copy !req
1654. Why'd I even tell you?
- 152 stitches from his nose job.Copy !req
1655. The number of his souvenir
shot glasses...Copy !req
1656. that he's collected in his travels.Copy !req
1657. His address.Copy !req
1658. No, he would never do
anything that prosaic.Copy !req
1659. The only thing I
really care about is that...Copy !req
1660. aside from the married thing
and the jail thing...Copy !req
1661. is the boat thing.Copy !req
1662. What boat thing?Copy !req
1663. I could never be
with someone who had a boat.Copy !req
1664. I have a boat.Copy !req
1665. Oh.Copy !req
1666. Which clinches it.
We'll never be together.Copy !req
1667. - How many?
- Three.Copy !req
1668. - Allow me.
- Thank you.Copy !req
1669. I could never be with someone
who likes Joni Mitchell.Copy !req
1670. It's cloud's illusions I recall
I really don't know clouds at allCopy !req
1671. What does that mean? Is she a pilot?Copy !req
1672. It must be a metaphor,
but I don't know what it is.Copy !req
1673. How's your book coming?Copy !req
1674. There's this
children's book editor I know.Copy !req
1675. She's excited to read it
when I'm finished.Copy !req
1676. Who would ever have thought
that I would write?Copy !req
1677. - if I hadn't had all this time...
- Uh-huh.Copy !req
1678. - You know what?
- What?Copy !req
1679. The truth is he was the one who
started me thinking about writing.Copy !req
1680. Mr. 152 Felony lndictments.Copy !req
1681. Mr. 152 Insights lnto My Soul.Copy !req
1682. Oh. Whoa. Yeah. Oh.Copy !req
1683. No competing with that.Copy !req
1684. I keep on bumping into you.Copy !req
1685. Hope your mango's ripe.Copy !req
1686. I think it is.Copy !req
1687. You want to bump into me...Copy !req
1688. on Saturday around lunchtime?Copy !req
1689. - Yeah.
- Over there?Copy !req
1690. - Uh-huh.
- Good.Copy !req
1691. How about meeting...Copy !req
1692. Saturday?Copy !req
1693. Four o'clock.Copy !req
1694. There's a place in Riverside Park
at 91 st Street...Copy !req
1695. where the path curves
and there's a garden.Copy !req
1696. Brinkley and I will be waiting.Copy !req
1697. Okay, let's do it.Copy !req
1698. Ready? And...Copy !req
1699. Doot.Copy !req
1700. There it goes.Copy !req
1701. - Today?
- Today.Copy !req
1702. Wow.Copy !req
1703. I know. In Riverside Park.Copy !req
1704. That would mean he's a Westsider.Copy !req
1705. Maybe I've seen him
and don't even know it.Copy !req
1706. You could have seen him every day
and not know it.Copy !req
1707. It's very possible.Copy !req
1708. - He could be anyone.
- He could be that guy.Copy !req
1709. And those flowers are for you.Copy !req
1710. Could be the Zipper Man.
- Who's that?Copy !req
1711. The Zipper Man.Copy !req
1712. Who is that?Copy !req
1713. He repairs zippers
on Amsterdam Avenue.Copy !req
1714. - Will you cut it out?
- You'd never have to buy new luggage.Copy !req
1715. The timing here is everything.
He's waited until you're primed.Copy !req
1716. See?Copy !req
1717. Until you are absolutely convinced
that there's no other man...Copy !req
1718. that you could possibly love.Copy !req
1719. Yes.Copy !req
1720. You know, sometimes I wonder.Copy !req
1721. What?Copy !req
1722. If I hadn't been Fox Books...Copy !req
1723. and you hadn't been
The Shop Around the Corner...Copy !req
1724. and you and I had just met.Copy !req
1725. - I know.
- Yeah. Yeah.Copy !req
1726. I'd have asked for your number.Copy !req
1727. I wouldn't have been able to wait 24 hours
before calling you and saying:Copy !req
1728. "How about some coffee...Copy !req
1729. or drinks or dinner...Copy !req
1730. or a movie...Copy !req
1731. for as long as we both shall live?"Copy !req
1732. Joe—Copy !req
1733. You and I would never have been at war.Copy !req
1734. The only thing we'd fight about would be
which video to rent on a Saturday night.Copy !req
1735. Who fights about that?Copy !req
1736. Some people.Copy !req
1737. Not us.Copy !req
1738. We would never.Copy !req
1739. If only.Copy !req
1740. - I gotta go.
- Let me ask you something.Copy !req
1741. How can you forgive this guy
for standing you up...Copy !req
1742. and not forgive me
for this tiny little thing...Copy !req
1743. of putting you out of business?Copy !req
1744. How I wish you would.Copy !req
1745. I really have to go.Copy !req
1746. You don't want to be late.Copy !req
1747. Brinkley!Copy !req
1748. Brinkley!Copy !req
1749. Don't cry, Shopgirl.Copy !req
1750. Don't cry.Copy !req
1751. I wanted it to be you.Copy !req
1752. I wanted it to be you so badly.Copy !req