1. My name's Ralph, and I'm a bad guy.Copy !req
2. Let's see. I'm nine feet tall.
I weigh 643 pounds.Copy !req
3. Got a little bit of a temper on me.Copy !req
4. My passion bubbles
very near the surface,Copy !req
5. I guess, not gonna lie.Copy !req
6. Anyhoo, what else? Uh...Copy !req
7. I'm a wrecker. I wreck things.
Professionally.Copy !req
8. I'm very good at what I do.
Probably the best I know.Copy !req
9. The thing is, fixing
is the name of the game.Copy !req
10. Literally, Fix-It Felix, Jr.Copy !req
11. Fix it, Felix!Copy !req
12. So, yeah, naturally,Copy !req
13. the guy with the name
Fix-It Felix is the good guy.Copy !req
14. He's nice enough as good guys go.Copy !req
15. Definitely fixes stuff really well.Copy !req
16. But, uh, if you've got a magic hammer
from your father,Copy !req
17. how hard can it be?Copy !req
18. If he was a regular contractor
carpenter guy,Copy !req
19. I guarantee you would not be ableCopy !req
20. to fix the damage that I do as quickly.Copy !req
21. And when Felix does
a good job, he gets a medal.Copy !req
22. But are there medals for
wrecking stuff really well?Copy !req
23. To that I say, "Ha!"Copy !req
24. And, no, there aren't.Copy !req
25. Thirty years I've been doing thisCopy !req
26. and I've seen a lot of
other games come and go.Copy !req
27. Kind of sad. I think about
all those guys from Asteroids.Copy !req
28. Boom! Gone. Centipede?Copy !req
29. Who knows where
that guy is, you know?Copy !req
30. Look, a steady arcade gig
is nothing to sneeze at.Copy !req
31. I'm very lucky.Copy !req
32. It's just, I got to say,Copy !req
33. it becomes kind of hard to love your jobCopy !req
34. when no one seems to
like you for doing it.Copy !req
35. All clear! The arcade is closed!Copy !req
36. Shoryuken!Copy !req
37. Whoo! What a day! You want to
head to Tappers, Ken?Copy !req
38. If you're buying, buddy.Copy !req
39. Quitting time!Copy !req
40. I don't know.Copy !req
41. Maybe I wouldn't be feeling this wayCopy !req
42. if things were different after work.Copy !req
43. But it is what it is.Copy !req
44. Good job, everyone!Copy !req
45. Felix and the NicelandersCopy !req
46. go hang out in their homesCopy !req
47. which he's just fixed,
and everyone, you know...Copy !req
48. They go to their homes, I go to mineCopy !req
49. which happens to be a dump.Copy !req
50. And when I say "a dump,"Copy !req
51. I don't mean like a shabby place.Copy !req
52. I mean an actual dump,Copy !req
53. where the garbage goesCopy !req
54. and a bunch of bricks
and smashed building parts...Copy !req
55. That's what I call home.Copy !req
56. I guess I can't bellyache too much.Copy !req
57. I got my bricks, I got my stump.Copy !req
58. It looks uncomfortable.
It's actually fine. I'm good.Copy !req
59. But if I'm really honest with myself...Copy !req
60. I see Felix up there
getting patted on the back,Copy !req
61. people are giving him pie
and thanking himCopy !req
62. and so happy to see him all the time.Copy !req
63. Sometimes I think...Copy !req
64. Man, it sure must be nice
being the good guy.Copy !req
65. Nice share, Ralph.Copy !req
66. As fellow bad guys,Copy !req
67. we've all felt what you're feelingCopy !req
68. and we've come to terms with it.Copy !req
69. - Really?
Right here.Copy !req
70. I am Zangief. I am bad guy.Copy !req
71. Hi, Zangief!
- Hi, Zangief.Copy !req
72. I relate to you, Ralph.
When I hit bottom,Copy !req
73. I was crushing man's skullCopy !req
74. like sparrow egg between my thighs.Copy !req
75. And I think, "Why do you have
to be so bad, Zangief?Copy !req
76. "Why can't you be more like good guy?"Copy !req
77. Then I have moment of clarity.Copy !req
78. If Zangief is good guy,Copy !req
79. who'll crush man's skullCopy !req
80. like sparrow's egg between thighs?Copy !req
81. And I say, "Zangief, you are bad guy,Copy !req
82. "but this does not mean
you are 'bad' guy."Copy !req
83. Right. I'm sorry. You lost me there.Copy !req
84. - Zombie! Bad guy!
Hi, Zombie.Copy !req
85. Hi, Zombie.Copy !req
86. Zangief saying
labels not make you happy.Copy !req
87. Good! Bad!Copy !req
88. You must love you.Copy !req
89. - Yeah! Inside here!
- Yes.Copy !req
90. Okay. All right, I get you.
Watch out. It's dripping.Copy !req
91. Question, Ralph.Copy !req
92. We've been asking you
to Bad-Anon for years nowCopy !req
93. and tonight you finally show up.Copy !req
94. - Why is that?
- I don't know.Copy !req
95. I just felt like coming.Copy !req
96. I suppose it has
something to do with the fact that...Copy !req
97. Well, today is the 30th
anniversary of my game.Copy !req
98. Well, happy anniversary, Ralph.Copy !req
99. Thanks, Satan.Copy !req
100. Uh, it's Sateen, actually.Copy !req
101. Got it. But here's the thing.Copy !req
102. I don't want to be the bad guy anymore.Copy !req
103. You can't mess with
the program, Ralph.Copy !req
104. You're not going Turbo, are you?Copy !req
105. Turbo? No, I'm not going Turbo!
Come on, guys!Copy !req
106. Is it Turbo to want a friend?
Or a medal?Copy !req
107. Or a piece of pie every once in a while?Copy !req
108. Is it Turbo to want more out of life?Copy !req
109. Yes!Copy !req
110. Ralph, Ralph, we get it.Copy !req
111. But we can't change who we are.Copy !req
112. And the sooner you accept that,Copy !req
113. the better off your game
and your life will be.Copy !req
114. Hey. One game at a time, Ralph.Copy !req
115. Let's close out with
the Bad Guy Affirmation.Copy !req
116. I'm bad, and that's good.Copy !req
117. I will never be good, and that's not bad.Copy !req
118. There's no one I'd rather be than me.Copy !req
119. Okay, gang,
see you next week.Copy !req
120. M. Listen, I can't do
snacks next week.Copy !req
121. Hang in there, Ralph.Copy !req
122. Hey, Zombie,
don't forget your hatchets.Copy !req
123. There you go.Copy !req
124. Step aside, sir. Random security check.Copy !req
125. Random my behind!
You always stop me.Copy !req
126. I'm just a surge protector
doing my job, sir.Copy !req
127. - Name?
- Lara Croft.Copy !req
128. - Name?
- Wreck-It Ralph!Copy !req
129. And where are you coming from?Copy !req
130. Uh... Pac-Man.Copy !req
131. Did you bring any fruit with you?Copy !req
132. No! No. No fruit.Copy !req
133. Okay, then. Where are you heading?Copy !req
134. Fix-It Felix Jr.Copy !req
135. - Anything to declare?
- I hate you.Copy !req
136. I get that a lot. Proceed.Copy !req
137. - Bad guy coming!Copy !req
138. If you leave your game,Copy !req
139. stay safe, stay alert,Copy !req
140. and whatever you do, don't die.Copy !req
141. Because if you die
outside your own gameCopy !req
142. you don't regenerate.Copy !req
143. Ever. Game over.Copy !req
144. Here you go, buddy.Copy !req
145. It's fresh. Straight from Pac-Man's.Copy !req
146. Hang in there, guys.Copy !req
147. - Name?Copy !req
148. Celebrate good times
Come on!Copy !req
149. "Happy 30th Anniversary"?Copy !req
150. They're having a party without me.Copy !req
151. Pac-Man? They invited Pac-Man?Copy !req
152. That cherry-chasing dot-muncherCopy !req
153. isn't even part of this game!Copy !req
154. Great party, Felix.Copy !req
155. Why, thank you, friend.Copy !req
156. Felix. You're needed on the dance floor!Copy !req
157. Whoo!Copy !req
158. Fix-It Felix!
Whoo-whoo! Fix-It Felix!Copy !req
159. Oh! I'll bet that's Mario.Copy !req
160. Fashionably late, per the norm.Copy !req
161. I'll get it, Felix.Copy !req
162. - Ahh!Copy !req
163. It's Ralph!Copy !req
164. - He'll wreck the party!
- Hide the stemware!Copy !req
165. Get rid of him, Felix.Copy !req
166. Oh, right. I'll go talk to him.Copy !req
167. Carry on, everyone.Copy !req
168. Ralph, can I help you?Copy !req
169. Hey, Felix.
Just wanted to check on you.Copy !req
170. I saw a big explosionCopy !req
171. or something go over the building there.Copy !req
172. Oh, those were just fireworks.Copy !req
173. Fireworks. Okay. PhewCopy !req
174. Somebody's birthday, or...Copy !req
175. Well, it's more of an anniversary.Copy !req
176. The 30th anniversary
of our game, actually.Copy !req
177. What? Is that today?Copy !req
178. I know!Copy !req
179. I'm such a dummy with dates.Copy !req
180. Anyway, uh, congratulations.Copy !req
181. Thank you, Ralph. And to you, too.Copy !req
182. Uh...Copy !req
183. Hi. Just a heads-up, Felix.Copy !req
184. They're bringing out the cake
in a few shakes.Copy !req
185. - Hey, Glen.
- Ralph.Copy !req
186. Cake? Heard about this cake stuff.Copy !req
187. Never had it.Copy !req
188. No one ever seems to throw it outCopy !req
189. so it never ends up in the dump.Copy !req
190. I never actually tasted it. Uh...Copy !req
191. I've always wanted to try cake.Copy !req
192. I don't suppose you'd like toCopy !req
193. come in and have a slice, would you?Copy !req
194. Hey-o, everybody! Oh!Copy !req
195. Ah!Copy !req
196. I'm okay. I'm okay. Fit as a fiddle.Copy !req
197. - Now, you all know Ralph.
- Evening.Copy !req
198. Evening, Nell, Lucy, Don, Dana...Copy !req
199. - Deanna.
Big Gene!Copy !req
200. Why is he here?Copy !req
201. He's just here for a slice of cake.Copy !req
202. And I'm a big part of the game,Copy !req
203. technically speaking.Copy !req
204. Why are you here, Gene?Copy !req
205. Oh, look! The cake!Copy !req
206. Well, I'll be dipped. You've
really outdone yourself, Mary.Copy !req
207. Oh, and look!
There's all of us at the top.Copy !req
208. Each apartment
is everyone's favorite flavor.Copy !req
209. Norwood's is red velvet.Copy !req
210. Guilty!Copy !req
211. And lemon for Lucy, rum cake for Gene,Copy !req
212. - and for Felix...
- Hey, Mary.Copy !req
213. Um...Copy !req
214. What's the flavor of that mud
that I'm stuck in there?Copy !req
215. Hmm? Oh. Chocolate.Copy !req
216. I've never been real fond of chocolate.Copy !req
217. Well, I did not know that.Copy !req
218. One other little thing.Copy !req
219. I hate to be picky,
but this angry little guy here...Copy !req
220. - My cake!
- ... might be a lot happierCopy !req
221. if you put him up here
with everyone else.Copy !req
222. See that? Look at that smile.Copy !req
223. No, no. You see, Ralph,Copy !req
224. there's no room for you up here.Copy !req
225. What about this?
We can make room.Copy !req
226. Here. We could take turns. Easy.Copy !req
227. How about we just eat the cake?Copy !req
228. Hang on. Felix needs to be on the roofCopy !req
229. because he's about to get his medal!Copy !req
230. Then how about we just take that medalCopy !req
231. and give it to Ralph for once?Copy !req
232. Would that be
the end of the world, Gene?Copy !req
233. Now you're just being ridiculous.Copy !req
234. Only good guys win medals,Copy !req
235. and you, sir, are no good guy.Copy !req
236. I could be a good guy if I wanted to,Copy !req
237. and I could win a medal!Copy !req
238. Uh-huh. And when you do,
come and talk to us.Copy !req
239. Then would you finally let me be
on top of the cake with you guys?Copy !req
240. If you won a medal,Copy !req
241. we'd let you live
up here in the penthouse!Copy !req
242. But it will never happenCopy !req
243. because you're just the bad guy
who wrecks the building.Copy !req
244. No, I'm not.Copy !req
245. Yes, you are!Copy !req
246. No, I'm not!Copy !req
247. Yes, you are.Copy !req
248. All right, Gene. You know what?Copy !req
249. I'm going to win a medal.Copy !req
250. Oh, I am going to win a medal!Copy !req
251. The shiniest medal
this place has ever seen!Copy !req
252. A medal that will be so goodCopy !req
253. that it will make Felix's
medals wet their pants!Copy !req
254. And good night!
Thank you for the party.Copy !req
255. - Is he serious?
- Oh, please!Copy !req
256. Where's a bad guy
going to win a medal?Copy !req
257. Of course he's not serious.Copy !req
258. I've never been more serious
about anything in my life.Copy !req
259. That's why I came
straight here, Tapper.Copy !req
260. You've never given me a bum steer.Copy !req
261. Now, come on. Where can a guy
like me go and win a medal?Copy !req
262. I don't think such a game exists, Ralph.Copy !req
263. Oh, come on. You know people.
There's got to be...Copy !req
264. Tapper, I need a root beer.Copy !req
265. Coming! Hold that thought.Copy !req
266. Okay. As you were saying.Copy !req
267. I was saying,
I can't spend another 30 yearsCopy !req
268. living alone in the garbage.Copy !req
269. I'm not going back without a medal.Copy !req
270. Well, I don't know what to tell you.Copy !req
271. Maybe somebody left a medal here.Copy !req
272. You're welcome to dig
through the lost and found.Copy !req
273. Okay, let's see what we got here.Copy !req
274. Oh! Shoo! Shoo! Go on, get out of here.Copy !req
275. Mushroom? No.Copy !req
276. What is this? No.Copy !req
277. Oh, come on, Zangief! Gross.Copy !req
278. Oh.Copy !req
279. What am I doing?Copy !req
280. - Hey, excuse you!
- We are humanity's last hope.Copy !req
281. Our mission? Destroy all Cy-Bugs.Copy !req
282. We are humanity's last hope.Copy !req
283. Uh... You okay there, space cadet?Copy !req
284. We've only been plugged in a weekCopy !req
285. and every day it's,
"Climb the building, then fight bugs.Copy !req
286. "Climb the building, fight more bugs!"Copy !req
287. Yeah, yeah. Right. Look.Copy !req
288. Easy on the overalls, spaceman.Copy !req
289. It's tough all over, all right?Copy !req
290. And all for what? A lousy medal?Copy !req
291. Medal? You win a medal?Copy !req
292. Yeah, Medal of Heroes.Copy !req
293. Ooh. Is it shiny?Copy !req
294. Pretty shiny.Copy !req
295. - Ooh! And it says "hero" on it?
- Uh-huh. Oh, yeah.Copy !req
296. And you say you win it
by climbing a building?Copy !req
297. - And fighting bugs!
- Right, bugs.Copy !req
298. Is there any chance I could go
with you to your gameCopy !req
299. and maybe get one of those medals?Copy !req
300. - Negatory.
- Does that mean maybe?Copy !req
301. No! Look, only the bravestCopy !req
302. and the best serve in our corps.Copy !req
303. Bug!Copy !req
304. Huh.Copy !req
305. We are humanity's last hope.Copy !req
306. Attention!Copy !req
307. The arcade will open in five minutes.Copy !req
308. Please report to your games.Copy !req
309. I can't feel my legs.
What is all this stuff?Copy !req
310. Smells like Ralph in here.Copy !req
311. Okay. All right.
What was it called again?Copy !req
312. Hero's something.Copy !req
313. Duty. Hero's Duty.Copy !req
314. Oh, there it is.Copy !req
315. Oh!Copy !req
316. Sorry, Q*bert. It's me, Ralph.Copy !req
317. Shh!Copy !req
318. The wall.Copy !req
319. Morning, kids. Come on in.Copy !req
320. Good to see you.
Good to see you. You, too, little fella.Copy !req
321. Quarter alert! Quarter alert!Copy !req
322. This is not a drill.Copy !req
323. Ooh! Sweet golden medal!Copy !req
324. On a planet with no nameCopy !req
325. a top-secret experiment
has gone horribly wrong.Copy !req
326. You are humanity's last hope.Copy !req
327. Rooting-tooting, ready for shooting!Copy !req
328. All right.Copy !req
329. Now listen up, because
I'm only going to say this once.Copy !req
330. Fear is a four-letter word, ladies.Copy !req
331. If you want to go pee-pee
in your big-boy slacks,Copy !req
332. keep it to yourself.Copy !req
333. It's make your mamas proud time!Copy !req
334. I love my mama!Copy !req
335. Heads up!
First-person shooter,Copy !req
336. coming through!Copy !req
337. Ooh, robot!Copy !req
338. Boop, boop, boop.Copy !req
339. Game play in three, two, one.Copy !req
340. We are humanity's last hope.Copy !req
341. Our mission?Copy !req
342. Destroy all Cy-Bugs.Copy !req
343. You ready, rookie? Let's find out.Copy !req
344. Sweet Mother Hubbard!Copy !req
345. No, no, no! Wait a second! Aah!Copy !req
346. Cy-Bug, twelve o'clock. Take it, newbie.Copy !req
347. No, no! Wait, wait!Copy !req
348. Watch it, rookie! These monsters
become what they eat.Copy !req
349. My gun! Give me that back.Copy !req
350. Shoot the eggs before they hatch!Copy !req
351. Oh, no!Copy !req
352. Something's coming out of their bottom!Copy !req
353. - Oh, gross!
- Markowski!Copy !req
354. Get back in formation!Copy !req
355. All right, ladies,Copy !req
356. the kitten whispers
and tickle fights stop now.Copy !req
357. The entrance to the lab
is straight ahead.Copy !req
358. - I'll meet you guys inside!
- No!Copy !req
359. Oh! Sanctuary! Sanctuary!Copy !req
360. I thought this was going
to be like Centipede!Copy !req
361. When did video games
become so violent and scary?Copy !req
362. Please, get me out of here!Copy !req
363. - Take her!Copy !req
364. What a rip-off!Copy !req
365. Ah! Get off me! It's game over. Stop it!Copy !req
366. Beacon up!Copy !req
367. Cease fire! Cease fire!Copy !req
368. Attention!
Return to start positions.Copy !req
369. Return to start positions.Copy !req
370. Here, let me help you. Sorry about that.Copy !req
371. Yeah, you must be upset.Copy !req
372. Markowski.
- Who?Copy !req
373. Whoa! Oh, yeah, me. I'm Markowski. Ah!Copy !req
374. What's the first rule of Hero's Duty?Copy !req
375. No cuts, no butts, no coconuts?Copy !req
376. Never interfere with
the first-person shooter.Copy !req
377. Our job is to get the gamers
to the top of that buildingCopy !req
378. so they can get a medal, and that's it!Copy !req
379. So stick to the program, soldier!Copy !req
380. Right. Right. Aye, aye.Copy !req
381. Quarter alert!
Quarter alert!Copy !req
382. All right, pussy willows.
Back to start positions!Copy !req
383. Oh!Copy !req
384. Yeah, right.
No way I'm going through that again.Copy !req
385. So that's where they
keep the medal, huh?Copy !req
386. Hmm. "New racers daily."Copy !req
387. Sweet! I got next game.Copy !req
388. Go away, kid!Copy !req
389. We're going to play
all nine of today's racers!Copy !req
390. Yeah!Copy !req
391. Sorry.Copy !req
392. Hmm. Where's the wrecking guy?Copy !req
393. Where's Ralph? He should be
wrecking the building.Copy !req
394. Shh! Stick with the program.Copy !req
395. Fix it, Felix!Copy !req
396. Ralph!
Quarter alert! Game on!Copy !req
397. Do something, Felix!Copy !req
398. Just act natural. I'll fix it.Copy !req
399. Ralph! Ralph!Copy !req
400. What the...Copy !req
401. Ralph? Ralph!Copy !req
402. Oh, my land! Where is he?Copy !req
403. Mr. Litwak!Copy !req
404. What's the trouble, sweetheart?Copy !req
405. The game's busted.Copy !req
406. I can fix it! I can fix it!Copy !req
407. MR. Oh, boy.Copy !req
408. Looks like the game's
gone cuckoo, like my nana.Copy !req
409. Sorry, sweetie.
Here's your quarter back.Copy !req
410. But what about the game?Copy !req
411. I'll have someone look at it tomorrow...Copy !req
412. But if he can't fix it, it might be timeCopy !req
413. to put old Ralph and Felix
out to pasture.Copy !req
414. Like my nana.Copy !req
415. Ladies and gentlemen,
we're out of order.Copy !req
416. Sweet mercy!
Without Ralph, we're doomed!Copy !req
417. They're going to pull our plug!Copy !req
418. Okay, everybody, calm down.Copy !req
419. Ralph probably fell asleepCopy !req
420. in the washroom of Tapper's again.Copy !req
421. - See? There he is now.Copy !req
422. Why, it's Q*bert.
What brings you here, neighbor?Copy !req
423. What's he saying, Felix?Copy !req
424. Stand by. My Q*bert-ese is a little rusty.Copy !req
425. Ralph's gone Turbo!Copy !req
426. Ooh!Copy !req
427. Shiny.Copy !req
428. Attention!
The arcade is now closed.Copy !req
429. Did you get a load of Markowski?Copy !req
430. - Shut your chew holes.Copy !req
431. Cy-Bug.Copy !req
432. Taste it!Copy !req
433. Slick Tiddlywinking, pint-size.Copy !req
434. I'm Fix-It Felix, Jr., ma'am.Copy !req
435. From the game Fix-It Felix, Jr.Copy !req
436. Jiminey jaminey!Copy !req
437. Look at that high definition. Your face!Copy !req
438. It's amazing!Copy !req
439. Flattery don't charge
these batteries, civilian.Copy !req
440. Now, state your business.Copy !req
441. I'm looking for my colleague,
Wreck-it Ralph?Copy !req
442. Never heard of him.Copy !req
443. Well, Q*bert saw him come in here.Copy !req
444. Impossible. Nothing gets past me.Copy !req
445. That came from the tower.Copy !req
446. Nice eggs. Nice eggs!Copy !req
447. Okay. That was easy.Copy !req
448. Congratulations, soldier.Copy !req
449. It is my honor to bestow upon youCopy !req
450. the Medal of Heroes.Copy !req
451. Wow!Copy !req
452. No way!Copy !req
453. Ten-hut!Copy !req
454. Wow!Copy !req
455. History will long revere
your courage and sacrifice.Copy !req
456. Well, thank you!Copy !req
457. You have etched in the rock of virtueCopy !req
458. a legacy beyond compare.Copy !req
459. Thanks, guys. At ease!Copy !req
460. You are the universe's greatest hero.Copy !req
461. - Oops!Copy !req
462. The living embodiment of
all this corps represents.Copy !req
463. Oh.Copy !req
464. Bravery. Integrity.
Grace under pressure.Copy !req
465. - And above all, dignity.Copy !req
466. Escape pod activated.Copy !req
467. Get off my face!Copy !req
468. Incoming!Copy !req
469. - Ralph!
- Cy-Bug!Copy !req
470. A-ha!Copy !req
471. Oh, no!Copy !req
472. Huh?Copy !req
473. Sayonara, sucker!Copy !req
474. Huh?Copy !req
475. "Sugar Rush"?Copy !req
476. Oh, no!Copy !req
477. This is that candy go-cart gameCopy !req
478. over by the Whack-A-Mole.Copy !req
479. I got to get out of here.Copy !req
480. Oh, no! My medal!Copy !req
481. No, no, no, no, my medal!Copy !req
482. Oh!Copy !req
483. No, no, my medal!Copy !req
484. - Hi, mister.Copy !req
485. Hello.Copy !req
486. Man, you scared me, kid.
Ah, I nearly soiled myself.Copy !req
487. What's your name?Copy !req
488. Uh... Ralph. Wreck-It Ralph.Copy !req
489. You're not from here, are you?Copy !req
490. No, well, yeah. I mean,
not from right in this area.Copy !req
491. I'm just doing some work here.Copy !req
492. What kind of work?Copy !req
493. Some routine candy tree trimming.Copy !req
494. You probably want to stand back.Copy !req
495. In fact, this whole areaCopy !req
496. is technically closed
while we're trimming.Copy !req
497. - Who's "we"?
- Candy tree department.Copy !req
498. Oh! Where is everybody else?Copy !req
499. Ah, it's just me today.Copy !req
500. So you just meant like the royal "we"?Copy !req
501. Yep. That's right.Copy !req
502. Hey, are you a hobo?Copy !req
503. No. I'm not a hobo, but I am busy.Copy !req
504. Okay? So you go home.Copy !req
505. What's that? Didn't hear you.Copy !req
506. Your breath is so bad
it made my ears numb.Copy !req
507. Listen, I tried to be nice.Copy !req
508. I tried to be nice.Copy !req
509. - You're mimicking me.
- You're mimicking me!Copy !req
510. - Okay.
- Okay.Copy !req
511. That is rude,
and this conversation is over.Copy !req
512. And this conversation is over.Copy !req
513. Uh, I wouldn't grab that branch
if I were you.Copy !req
514. I'm from the candy tree department,
so I know what...Copy !req
515. It's a double stripe.Copy !req
516. Double stripes break. Guh-doy!Copy !req
517. Why are your hands so freakishly big?Copy !req
518. Uh, I don't know. Why are you
so freakishly annoying?Copy !req
519. Why are you so freakishly...Copy !req
520. Sweet mother of monkey milk!
A gold coin!Copy !req
521. Don't even think about it. That is mine.Copy !req
522. - Race you for it!
- Hey!Copy !req
523. I don't have to race for it
because it's mine!Copy !req
524. - Double stripe!
- Come back here!Copy !req
525. - The winner!
- Give it back! Give it!Copy !req
526. Whoa!Copy !req
527. Double stripe.Copy !req
528. Thank you!Copy !req
529. Wait! Let me talk to you for one second.Copy !req
530. Okay. Here's the thing.Copy !req
531. I'm not from the candy tree department.Copy !req
532. Lying to a child. Shame on you, Ralph.Copy !req
533. But I wasn't lying about the medal.
That is my medal!Copy !req
534. That's why I was climbing the tree.
It's mine!Copy !req
535. It's precious to me.Copy !req
536. That thing is my ticket to a better life.Copy !req
537. Yeah, well, now it's my ticket.Copy !req
538. - What the...
- See you, chump!Copy !req
539. Come back! I'll find you!Copy !req
540. I will find you!Copy !req
541. Double stripe!Copy !req
542. Nowhere to hide!Copy !req
543. Yeah, he banged around in here
like some kind of hot shot,Copy !req
544. then he went barreling down
into that sweet little gameCopy !req
545. like a crazy person.Copy !req
546. "Sugar Rush."Copy !req
547. Cy-Bugs would chew up that gameCopy !req
548. faster than a chicken hawk
in a coop of crippled roosters.Copy !req
549. - What was that, now?
- What are you, thick?Copy !req
550. There was a Cy-Bug on that shuttle!Copy !req
551. Do you even know what a Cy-Bug is?Copy !req
552. I can't say that I do, ma'am.Copy !req
553. Cy-Bugs are like a virus.Copy !req
554. They don't know they're in a game.Copy !req
555. All they know is eat, kill, multiply.Copy !req
556. Without a beacon to stop them,Copy !req
557. they'll consume Sugar Rush.Copy !req
558. But do you think they'll stop there?Copy !req
559. - Yes!
- Wrong!Copy !req
560. Viruses do not stop!Copy !req
561. Once those Cy-Bugs
finish off Sugar Rush,Copy !req
562. they'll invade every other game
until this arcadeCopy !req
563. is nothing but a smoking husk
of forgotten dreams.Copy !req
564. Kohut! My cruiser.Copy !req
565. Jeepers. Is she always this intense?Copy !req
566. It's not her fault.Copy !req
567. She's programmed with
the most tragic back-story ever.Copy !req
568. The one day she didn't do
a perimeter check...Copy !req
569. Her wedding day.Copy !req
570. Wait, ma'am! I'm going with you.Copy !req
571. Like fun you are, short stack.Copy !req
572. If you die outside your game,
you don't regenerate.Copy !req
573. Well, neither do you, ma'am.Copy !req
574. And it is my job to fix
what Ralph wrecks.Copy !req
575. And I cannot ask youCopy !req
576. to risk your life cleaning up his mess.Copy !req
577. No flex on this one, ma'am.
I am coming along with you.Copy !req
578. Citizens of Sugar Rush...Copy !req
579. Just in time.Copy !req
580. all hail our rightful ruler, King Candy.Copy !req
581. Hello, my royal subjects!Copy !req
582. Ha-ha! Have some candy!Copy !req
583. Thank you for that
stirring introduction, Sour Bill.Copy !req
584. Mmm-hmm.Copy !req
585. And thank you to today's avatars.Copy !req
586. It was a wonderful day of racing. It was.Copy !req
587. But now the arcade is closed,Copy !req
588. so it's time to wipe the slate cleanCopy !req
589. and race to decide our new roster.Copy !req
590. The first nine racers
across that finish lineCopy !req
591. will represent Sugar Rush
as tomorrow's avatars!Copy !req
592. Race! Race! Race!Copy !req
593. Okay, calm down.Copy !req
594. Listen! This event is pay-to-play.
We all know this.Copy !req
595. The fee to compete is one gold coinCopy !req
596. from your previous winnings,Copy !req
597. if you've ever won, which I have.Copy !req
598. Let me go first!Copy !req
599. King Candy!Copy !req
600. Taffyta Muttonfudge!Copy !req
601. Stay sweet!Copy !req
602. Adorabeezle Winterpop.Copy !req
603. Gloyd Orangeboar!Copy !req
604. Little stealer!
Wait till I catch that brat.Copy !req
605. Minty Zaki.
Snowanna Rainbeau.Copy !req
606. Rancis Fluggerbutter.
Jubileena Bing-Bing.Copy !req
607. Swizzle Malarkey.Copy !req
608. Candlehead.Copy !req
609. Sour Bill, who's that last one?Copy !req
610. Vanellope von Schweetz!Copy !req
611. Yippee! I'm in the race!Copy !req
612. Vanellope?Copy !req
613. The Glitch!Copy !req
614. Now, now!Copy !req
615. Everything is all right! Security!Copy !req
616. Come here, kid!Copy !req
617. We're not going to hurt you,
you little freak!Copy !req
618. Get back here!Copy !req
619. Slow down! Slow down a little bit.Copy !req
620. You! Give me back my medal right now!Copy !req
621. - Ah, boy!
- Go!Copy !req
622. What is that?Copy !req
623. Come on! Go! Roll!Copy !req
624. Careful! What are you doing?Copy !req
625. Huh?Copy !req
626. Come back here!Copy !req
627. I can't move!Copy !req
628. Now we got him!Copy !req
629. Oh, good, the cops. She went that way!Copy !req
630. - Hold still!
- Take that!Copy !req
631. Ow! What are you doing?Copy !req
632. Okay, folks.Copy !req
633. Calm down! Everything's all right.Copy !req
634. The monster's been caught!Copy !req
635. We'll repair all the damage.Copy !req
636. Don't worry. We will have our race
before the arcade opens.Copy !req
637. And I'm in it. Yes!Copy !req
638. There's no way that
I am racing with a glitch.Copy !req
639. Rancis, Candlehead, come on.Copy !req
640. Sour Bill, that glitch
cannot be allowed to race!Copy !req
641. And bring that thing to my castle.Copy !req
642. Guys! She took...Copy !req
643. Or-e-oh
Oreo!Copy !req
644. Or-e-ohCopy !req
645. Sour Bill, de-taffify this monsterCopy !req
646. so we can see
what we're up against here.Copy !req
647. Mm-kay.Copy !req
648. Milk my duds! It's Wreck-It Ralph?Copy !req
649. Yeah. Who are you,
the guy that makes the donuts?Copy !req
650. Please. No. I'm King Candy!Copy !req
651. I see you're a fan of pink.Copy !req
652. Salmon. Salmon, that's obviously...Copy !req
653. What are you doing here?Copy !req
654. Look, Your Candiness,
this is just a big misunderstanding.Copy !req
655. Just get me out of this cupcake,Copy !req
656. I'll get my medal,
and I'll be out of your way.Copy !req
657. Your medal?
Bad guys don't win medals.Copy !req
658. Well, this one did.Copy !req
659. I earned it over in Hero's Duty.Copy !req
660. You game-jumped?Copy !req
661. Ralph, you're not going Turbo, are you?Copy !req
662. What? No, no.Copy !req
663. Because if you think you can
come in here to my kingdomCopy !req
664. and take over my game,
you've got another thing coming!Copy !req
665. Easy, Your Puffiness.Copy !req
666. It's not my fault one of your childrenCopy !req
667. of the candy corn stole my medal.Copy !req
668. "Children of the candy corn"? Who'd...Copy !req
669. The Glitch!Copy !req
670. The coin she used to
buy her way into the race.Copy !req
671. That was your medal?Copy !req
672. She did what? I need that back!Copy !req
673. Well, I'm afraid I can't help you.
It's gone, you know.Copy !req
674. It's nothing but code now.Copy !req
675. It will stay that way
until someone wins the cupCopy !req
676. at the end of the race.Copy !req
677. Maybe I'll have to have a little talkCopy !req
678. with the winner then.Copy !req
679. Is that a threat I smell?Copy !req
680. Beyond the halitosis
you so obviously suffer from.Copy !req
681. Listen, Nilly-Wafer,
I'm not leaving without my medal!Copy !req
682. Yes, you are.Copy !req
683. Wynnchel, Duncan,
get him out of that cupcakeCopy !req
684. and on the first train back home.Copy !req
685. If I ever see you here again,
Wreck-It Ralph,Copy !req
686. I'll lock you in my fungeon.Copy !req
687. Fungeon?Copy !req
688. Fun dungeon, you know?
It's a play on words.Copy !req
689. It's the...Copy !req
690. Never mind! I've got a glitch
to deal with, thanks to you.Copy !req
691. Goodbye, Wreck-it Ralph!
It hasn't been a pleasure.Copy !req
692. This thing is hard as a rock.Copy !req
693. I can see that.Copy !req
694. - Get the tools.
- What tools?Copy !req
695. - Quiet, you!
- Ow!Copy !req
696. What? No!Copy !req
697. - Take it easy, big boy!
- Stay away from me!Copy !req
698. He's getting away!Copy !req
699. Quick! Call out the Devil Dogs.Copy !req
700. Chocolate. I hate chocolate!Copy !req
701. I got to get my medal back.Copy !req
702. The pot goes to the winning racer!Copy !req
703. Hey, kids!
Can I talk to you for a second?Copy !req
704. Hello, fellow racers!Copy !req
705. It's that little crumb snatcher.Copy !req
706. Candlehead, Taffyta, Rancis,
you're looking well.Copy !req
707. Came by to check out
the competition, huh?Copy !req
708. Well, here it is, the Lickety-Split!Copy !req
709. Sheesh. Looks like she built it herself.Copy !req
710. I built it myself.Copy !req
711. Fastest pedal-power
west of the Whack-A-MoleCopy !req
712. Check her out.Copy !req
713. Oh, Vanellope, it's so... You.Copy !req
714. But you have to
back out of the race. Yeah.Copy !req
715. Oh, no, I don't,Copy !req
716. because I paid my fee
and I'm on the board...Copy !req
717. So, yeah, I'm definitely racing.Copy !req
718. Yeah, well, King Candy says
glitches can't race.Copy !req
719. I'm not a glitch, Taffyta.
I've just got pixslexia, okay?Copy !req
720. The rules are there
for a reason, Vanellope.Copy !req
721. To protect us. Say I'm you.Copy !req
722. I'm in my weird little car and I'm drivingCopy !req
723. and I actually feel kind of cool for once.Copy !req
724. And then, all of a sudden, oh, no.Copy !req
725. I'm glitching!Copy !req
726. Hey!
- See?Copy !req
727. You're an accident
just waiting to happen.Copy !req
728. Oh, no! I glitched, too!Copy !req
729. Uncool.Copy !req
730. Stop it! Stop! You're breaking it!Copy !req
731. Please!Copy !req
732. I just want to race like you guys.Copy !req
733. You will never be a racer
because you're a glitch.Copy !req
734. And that's all you'll ever be!Copy !req
735. Hey! Leave her alone!Copy !req
736. Let's get out of here!Copy !req
737. Scram, you rotten little cavities!Copy !req
738. Before I throw you in the mud!Copy !req
739. What are you looking at?Copy !req
740. You're welcome, you rotten little thief.Copy !req
741. I'm not a thief!
I just borrowed your stupid coin.Copy !req
742. I was going to give it back to you
as soon as I won the race.Copy !req
743. It's not a coin. It is a medal.Copy !req
744. Coin, medal, whatever.Copy !req
745. Just go back to your own dumb game
and win another one.Copy !req
746. I can't. I didn't win it in my game.Copy !req
747. I won it in Hero's Duty.Copy !req
748. Hero's Doodie?Copy !req
749. It's not that kind of duty.Copy !req
750. I bet you really got to watch
where you stepCopy !req
751. in a game called Hero's Doodie!Copy !req
752. What did you win the medal for, wiping?Copy !req
753. I hope you washed your hands
after you handled that medal.Copy !req
754. - Listen!
- One more, one more.Copy !req
755. Why did the hero flush the toilet?Copy !req
756. - Say "why."
- Why?Copy !req
757. Because it was his doodie!Copy !req
758. How dare you insult Hero's Duty?Copy !req
759. You little guttersnipe!Copy !req
760. I earned that medalCopy !req
761. and you better get it back
for me toot-sweet, sister!Copy !req
762. Well, unless you've got a go-cartCopy !req
763. hidden in the fat folds of your neck,Copy !req
764. I can't help you!Copy !req
765. What a moron.Copy !req
766. Hey, genius! It's a jawbreaker.Copy !req
767. You're never going to break...Copy !req
768. Huh.Copy !req
769. Enjoy your little tantrum, diaper baby?Copy !req
770. Leave me alone.Copy !req
771. Look, you want that medal,
right? And I want to race.Copy !req
772. So here's what I'm thinking.Copy !req
773. You help me get a new cart...
A real cart...Copy !req
774. And I'll win the race
and get you back your medal.Copy !req
775. You want me to help you?Copy !req
776. All you got to do is
break something for me.Copy !req
777. Come on. What do you say, friend?Copy !req
778. We are not friends.Copy !req
779. Oh, come on, pal. You son of a gun.Copy !req
780. Come on, buddy. Let's shake on it.Copy !req
781. Ah. Come on, chumbo.Copy !req
782. Ralph, my man. My main man.Copy !req
783. Hey!Copy !req
784. My arm's getting tired.
Do we have a deal or not?Copy !req
785. You better win.Copy !req
786. Well, I'll say this much,Copy !req
787. they don't call your friend
"Wreck-It" for nothing.Copy !req
788. There's the shuttle.Copy !req
789. Is he in there?Copy !req
790. Nope. Lucky for him.Copy !req
791. Otherwise I would have
slapped his corpse.Copy !req
792. No Cy-Bug, either.Copy !req
793. Got to find it before it lays its filthy eggs.Copy !req
794. It came this way,Copy !req
795. but the sugar particles
in the atmosphereCopy !req
796. are jamming my sensor.Copy !req
797. Can't get a read on it.Copy !req
798. So what is it with this Wreck-It joker?Copy !req
799. Why did he go AWOL?Copy !req
800. I wish I knew, ma'am.Copy !req
801. He was acting all squirrelly last night...Copy !req
802. Going on about cake and medals...Copy !req
803. But I never thought he'd go Turbo.Copy !req
804. "Go Turbo"?Copy !req
805. That's right,
you guys just got plugged in.Copy !req
806. Well, back when the arcade
first opened,Copy !req
807. Turbo Time was by far
the most popular game.Copy !req
808. - And Turbo...
- Turbo-tastic!Copy !req
809. - He loved the attention.
- Turbo-tastic!Copy !req
810. So, when RoadBlasters got plugged inCopy !req
811. and stole Turbo's thunder...Copy !req
812. New game. All right!Copy !req
813. Boy, was he jealous.Copy !req
814. So jealous that
he abandoned his gameCopy !req
815. and tried to take over the new one.Copy !req
816. These are
the greatest graphics I've ever seen!Copy !req
817. Turbo-tastic!Copy !req
818. Hey. Is that...
That looks like Turbo.Copy !req
819. What's Turbo doing
in this game? Aw, come on!Copy !req
820. Mr. Litwak!Copy !req
821. Turbo ended up
putting both games and himselfCopy !req
822. out of order, for good.Copy !req
823. Yes, the selfish man
is like a mangy dogCopy !req
824. chasing a cautionary tale.Copy !req
825. I know, right?Copy !req
826. That's why I have to get Ralph homeCopy !req
827. or the same thing's
gonna happen to my game.Copy !req
828. - Huh?Copy !req
829. What is this?Copy !req
830. - "Nesquik Sand"?
- Quicksand?Copy !req
831. Oh, I'll hop out
and grab you one of those vines.Copy !req
832. Huh!Copy !req
833. I can't hop. I'm hop-less.
This is hopeless!Copy !req
834. We're going to drown here.Copy !req
835. Stop thrashing. Stop moving.Copy !req
836. You're making us sink faster.Copy !req
837. We're going to die!Copy !req
838. Get ahold of yourself!Copy !req
839. The vines. They're Laffy Taffy.Copy !req
840. They're attracted to
whatever makes them laugh.Copy !req
841. Here, hit me again.Copy !req
842. That's not funny enough. Harder!Copy !req
843. Look, you're a nice guy. I can't...Copy !req
844. No, ma'am!
The arcade is depending on us.Copy !req
845. Now do your duty. That's an ord...Copy !req
846. - Oh!Copy !req
847. It's working! Hit me again.Copy !req
848. Ooh, your eye.Copy !req
849. I can fix it. Now...Copy !req
850. Oh! San Fran-tastic! Again!Copy !req
851. Ow! You mean business!Copy !req
852. Ow! Yikes on bikes!Copy !req
853. Wow! We're... killing... them!Copy !req
854. Comedy gold!Copy !req
855. All right, enough with the goo-goo eyes.Copy !req
856. We've got work to do. Let's go.Copy !req
857. Ugh. We lost the Cy-Bug.Copy !req
858. Come on. We'll get
a better view from the air.Copy !req
859. You think you can fix that shuttle?Copy !req
860. Can do.Copy !req
861. Shh!Copy !req
862. All right, do your thing, knuckles.
Bust it open!Copy !req
863. What's this?
You're a full-on criminal, aren't you?Copy !req
864. Hey, we shook on it.Copy !req
865. Thank you, Jeeves.Copy !req
866. What is this place?
Where are the carts?Copy !req
867. You gotta make one.Copy !req
868. What? No, no.Copy !req
869. Look, kid, bad idea. Trust me.Copy !req
870. I don't make things. I break things.Copy !req
871. Well, it looks like
you're going to be stepping outsideCopy !req
872. your comfort zone, then, Gladys.Copy !req
873. Ooh, this is a good one!Copy !req
874. Welcome to the bakery!
Let's bake a kart!Copy !req
875. What is this, another game?Copy !req
876. Yeah, well,
it's a mini-game.Copy !req
877. You have one minute to win it.Copy !req
878. - What?
- Come on, Ralph!Copy !req
879. Go! Mixing.Copy !req
880. Put the ingredients in the bowlCopy !req
881. and throw away the trash.Copy !req
882. Hairbrush. No!Copy !req
883. Underpants. No, no!Copy !req
884. You're getting all the wrong stuff, kid.Copy !req
885. I'm trying!Copy !req
886. Let me up there. I'll do it. No. Yes.Copy !req
887. Gross. Milk. Yes, yes, yes. Oh!Copy !req
888. Batter up!Copy !req
889. Ah!Copy !req
890. Come on!
No sleeping on the job!Copy !req
891. Baking! Pump up the heatCopy !req
892. and hold the perfect temperature.Copy !req
893. Ralph, a little help here?Copy !req
894. I'm on it.Copy !req
895. Yeah, no problem.
Give me this thing here.Copy !req
896. Okay, good. Little more.Copy !req
897. Yeah, that's it! Hold it, hold it, hold it.Copy !req
898. Yes! Come on. Get up, Ralph!
Fifteen seconds!Copy !req
899. Decorating!
- Wheels first.Copy !req
900. - How many?
- Four, doy!Copy !req
901. Got it.Copy !req
902. Now frosting. A buttload of frosting!Copy !req
903. No problem.Copy !req
904. Oh.Copy !req
905. Time's up!
Congratulations.Copy !req
906. You did it, and here's your cart!Copy !req
907. Look, kid... I tried to warn you.Copy !req
908. I can't make things. I just break...Copy !req
909. I love it.Copy !req
910. You do?Copy !req
911. I love it.Copy !req
912. I love it! I love it! I love it!Copy !req
913. Look, it's got a real engine!Copy !req
914. And look at these wheels.Copy !req
915. I love it! I finally have a real cart!Copy !req
916. Come on. A work of art
like this must be signed.Copy !req
917. Cream puffs.Copy !req
918. Hmm?Copy !req
919. This is Beard Papa.Copy !req
920. The Glitch is in the bakery!
Get me King Candy!Copy !req
921. Oh, what? You have teeth?Copy !req
922. I don't think I've ever
seen you smile before.Copy !req
923. I'm not smiling. I was... I'm gassy, okay?Copy !req
924. Hold it right there, Glitch!Copy !req
925. - And Wreck-It Ralph?
- Uh-oh.Copy !req
926. Start the cart! Start the cart!Copy !req
927. What are you waiting for?
Come on. Let's go!Copy !req
928. I don't know how to drive a real cart.Copy !req
929. You don't what?Copy !req
930. Are you hurt, Sire?Copy !req
931. No, he just glazed me. Get them!Copy !req
932. - Gangway!
- Oh!Copy !req
933. Ah!Copy !req
934. Stop, in the name of the king!
That's me!Copy !req
935. Get off the road!Copy !req
936. Head for Diet Cola Mountain!Copy !req
937. - Drive into the wall!
- What?Copy !req
938. Right there, between
the two sugar-free lollipops!Copy !req
939. - Are you crazy?
- Just do it!Copy !req
940. Oh!Copy !req
941. Where did they go?
They should have just turned.Copy !req
942. Find that glitch! Destroy that cart!Copy !req
943. She can't be allowed to race!Copy !req
944. So let me get this straight.
You don't know how to drive.Copy !req
945. Well, no, not technically.Copy !req
946. - I just thought that...
- What did you think?Copy !req
947. "Oh, I'll just magically win the raceCopy !req
948. "just because I really want to!"Copy !req
949. Look, wise guy. I know I'm a racer.Copy !req
950. I can feel it in my code.Copy !req
951. That's it! I'm never
getting my medal back.Copy !req
952. What is the big whoop about
that crummy medal anyway?Copy !req
953. The big whoop?Copy !req
954. Well, this may come as
a shock to you, but in my game,Copy !req
955. I'm the bad guy
and I live in the garbage.Copy !req
956. - Cool.
- No. Not cool.Copy !req
957. Unhygienic and lonely and boring.Copy !req
958. And that crummy medal
was going to change all that.Copy !req
959. I go home with that baby
around my neckCopy !req
960. and I'll get a penthouse. Pies.Copy !req
961. Ice sculptures. Fireworks!Copy !req
962. It's grown-up stuff.
You wouldn't understand.Copy !req
963. No, I get it!Copy !req
964. That's exactly
what racing would do for me!Copy !req
965. - Well, guess what?
- What?Copy !req
966. News flash! Neither one of us
is getting what we want!Copy !req
967. What was that?Copy !req
968. Yeah! Check it out. Look!Copy !req
969. Oh!Copy !req
970. Ow! Whoa!Copy !req
971. You got to watch out for the splash.Copy !req
972. That stuff is broiling hot.Copy !req
973. Yeah, I got that. Thank you.Copy !req
974. What is this dump?Copy !req
975. I think it's some sort of
unfinished bonus level.Copy !req
976. Yeah. It's pretty cool, huh?Copy !req
977. I found that secret opening,
and now I live here.Copy !req
978. See? Oh, look, look, look.Copy !req
979. Welcome to my home!Copy !req
980. I sleep in these candy wrappers.Copy !req
981. I bundle myself up like
a little homeless lady.Copy !req
982. By yourself?Copy !req
983. With all this garbage around you?Copy !req
984. Well, yeah.Copy !req
985. I mean, everyone here
says I'm just a mistakeCopy !req
986. and that I wasn't
even supposed to exist.Copy !req
987. What do you expect?Copy !req
988. Listen, kid...Copy !req
989. I know it's none of my businessCopy !req
990. but why do you even
stick around this game?Copy !req
991. You really don't know anything, do you?Copy !req
992. Glitches can't leave their games.Copy !req
993. It's one of the joys of being me.Copy !req
994. Hey, what are you doing? Come on!Copy !req
995. I know it's a dump, but it's all I got.Copy !req
996. If you're going to be a racer,Copy !req
997. you're going to have
to learn how to drive.Copy !req
998. And you can't do that without a track.Copy !req
999. Whoa!Copy !req
1000. All right, now.Copy !req
1001. Let's hustle up.
We've got some driving to do.Copy !req
1002. I'm going to learn to drive!
I'm going to learn to drive!Copy !req
1003. Oh, wait. Do you know how to drive?Copy !req
1004. Yeah! I mean, I haven't done it, but...Copy !req
1005. Look, I flew a spaceship today, okay?Copy !req
1006. You crashed it.Copy !req
1007. Just get in. How hard can it be?
Okay, uh...Copy !req
1008. Start it up.Copy !req
1009. There we go. So there are
some buttons on the floor.Copy !req
1010. - Pedals.
- Pedals. Right.Copy !req
1011. Now, uh, that's the go pedal.Copy !req
1012. That I believe is the stopper.Copy !req
1013. And this... Wait.Copy !req
1014. What is this? That doesn't do anything.Copy !req
1015. Ooh, what does this joystick do?Copy !req
1016. Okay, good. Let's try that again.Copy !req
1017. I've been looking
for a driver who's qualifiedCopy !req
1018. So if you think that you're the oneCopy !req
1019. Ow!Copy !req
1020. To step into my rideCopy !req
1021. I'm a fine-tuned supersonic
speed machineCopy !req
1022. Ow!Copy !req
1023. With a sunroof top and a gangster leanCopy !req
1024. Ow!Copy !req
1025. So if you feel me
let me know, know, knowCopy !req
1026. Ow!Copy !req
1027. So start me up
and watch me go, go, go, goCopy !req
1028. Get you where you wanna go
If you know what I meanCopy !req
1029. Got a ride that's smoother
than a limousineCopy !req
1030. 'Cause I'm 0 to 60 in three point fiveCopy !req
1031. Now shift it.Copy !req
1032. Baby you got the keysCopy !req
1033. That's good. Keep going! Shift it again!Copy !req
1034. Now shut up and drive
Drive, drive, driveCopy !req
1035. I told you, racing's in my code!Copy !req
1036. So if you feel me
let me know, know, knowCopy !req
1037. I got that medal in the bag!Copy !req
1038. Hey, Ralphie, watch this!Copy !req
1039. Get you where you wanna go
if you know what I meanCopy !req
1040. Got a ride that's smoother
than a limousineCopy !req
1041. Whoo-hoo!Copy !req
1042. Cause I'm zero to 60 in three point fiveCopy !req
1043. Baby you got the keysCopy !req
1044. - Look out!
- Whoa!Copy !req
1045. Shut up and driveCopy !req
1046. Ah!Copy !req
1047. Hot cola!Copy !req
1048. Now shut up and driveCopy !req
1049. So how did I do?Copy !req
1050. Um...Copy !req
1051. Well, you almost blew up
the whole mountain.Copy !req
1052. Right, right. That's a good note.Copy !req
1053. You got to get that
glitch under control, kid.Copy !req
1054. Okay, I will, I will.Copy !req
1055. And then you think I got a chance?Copy !req
1056. Um...Copy !req
1057. Tiny.Copy !req
1058. Yes, I'm going to win!Copy !req
1059. I'm going to win! I'm going to win!Copy !req
1060. - Top shelf.
- Top shelf.Copy !req
1061. Did you find her?
Tell me you found her.Copy !req
1062. You didn't?Copy !req
1063. Go. Leave me.Copy !req
1064. Up, up, down, down...Copy !req
1065. Start!Copy !req
1066. Oh, the code. It's the sweet
lifeblood of the game.Copy !req
1067. Where are you? Let's see...
Stadium, no. Jumbotron.Copy !req
1068. Ha-ha! There it is. The winner's cup.Copy !req
1069. One of these things is
not like the others... It's you!Copy !req
1070. We're going to give you
a nice new home.Copy !req
1071. Success!Copy !req
1072. Sour Bill, I'm going out.Copy !req
1073. You're in charge of the castle
until I get back.Copy !req
1074. Your face is still red.Copy !req
1075. You might want to
hit it again with your hammer.Copy !req
1076. Oh, that's not blunt force trauma, ma'am.Copy !req
1077. That's just the honey glow
in my cheeks.Copy !req
1078. Okay.Copy !req
1079. Ma'am, I just got to tell you...Copy !req
1080. You are one dynamite gal.Copy !req
1081. Wow, you are one dynamite gal.Copy !req
1082. One dynamite gal.Copy !req
1083. Dynamite gal.Copy !req
1084. Dynamite...Copy !req
1085. Get out.Copy !req
1086. All I said is you're a dynamite gal.Copy !req
1087. I said get out!Copy !req
1088. Oh. Jiminey jaminey.Copy !req
1089. Yes?Copy !req
1090. Oh.Copy !req
1091. I'm Fix-It Felix Jr., sir,
from the game Fix-It Felix Jr.Copy !req
1092. Have you seen my friend Ralph?Copy !req
1093. Wreck-It Ralph?Copy !req
1094. Yes. Yes, that's him!Copy !req
1095. We should have locked him up
when we had the chance.Copy !req
1096. Locked him up?Copy !req
1097. I'm not making
the same mistake with you.Copy !req
1098. Hurry, hurry!
Let's go. Time's a-wastin'.Copy !req
1099. Come on, Ralph!Copy !req
1100. This is it. This is really happening.Copy !req
1101. I almost don't believe it.Copy !req
1102. I mean, I have dreamt about it
for so long, and now...Copy !req
1103. And now... Now I think
I'm going to puke, actually.Copy !req
1104. I mean, I think I might puke.Copy !req
1105. - You know, like a "vurp."
- A what?Copy !req
1106. Vomit and a burp together,Copy !req
1107. and you can taste it,
and it's just like rising up.Copy !req
1108. Oh, this is so exciting!Copy !req
1109. Yes, it is. It's exciting.Copy !req
1110. Am I ready to be a real racer?Copy !req
1111. Ralph, what if the gamers don't like me?Copy !req
1112. Who doesn't love a brat
with dirty hair? Come on.Copy !req
1113. Those people are going
to love you. You know why?Copy !req
1114. - Because you're a winner.
- I'm a winner.Copy !req
1115. - And you're adorable!
- I'm adorable!Copy !req
1116. And everyone loves
an adorable winner!Copy !req
1117. Yeah!Copy !req
1118. Okay, come on. Listen to me.Copy !req
1119. If you get nervous,
just keep telling yourself,Copy !req
1120. "I must win Ralph's medal
or his life will be ruined."Copy !req
1121. - And have fun. Got it?
- Got it.Copy !req
1122. Whoa!Copy !req
1123. Oh, wait!Copy !req
1124. Hold on!Copy !req
1125. Where are you going?Copy !req
1126. I forgot something! I'll be right back!Copy !req
1127. Kids.Copy !req
1128. Ralph!
There you are. Hello!Copy !req
1129. - You!
- I come alone, unarmed.Copy !req
1130. I've had enough of you, pillow pants!Copy !req
1131. Please. Calm down! Please, look. Don't!Copy !req
1132. I'm going to beat the filling out of you!Copy !req
1133. You wouldn't hit a guy
with glasses, would you?Copy !req
1134. You hit a guy with glasses.
That's... Well played.Copy !req
1135. - What do you want, Candy?Copy !req
1136. Listen, I just want to talk to you.Copy !req
1137. I'm not interested in
anything you have to say.Copy !req
1138. How about this?
Are you interested in this?Copy !req
1139. My medal. How did you...Copy !req
1140. It doesn't matter.
It's yours! Go ahead, take it.Copy !req
1141. Whoa.Copy !req
1142. All I ask is that you hear me out.Copy !req
1143. About what?Copy !req
1144. Ralph, do you know
what the hardest partCopy !req
1145. about being a king is?Copy !req
1146. Doing what's right, no matter what.Copy !req
1147. Get to the point.Copy !req
1148. Point being, I need your help.Copy !req
1149. Sad as it is, Vanellope
cannot be allowed to race.Copy !req
1150. Why are you people so against her?Copy !req
1151. I'm not against her!
I'm trying to protect her!Copy !req
1152. If Vanellope wins that raceCopy !req
1153. she'll be added to the race roster.Copy !req
1154. Then gamers can choose her
as their avatar.Copy !req
1155. And when they see her glitchingCopy !req
1156. and twitching and just being herself,Copy !req
1157. they'll think our game is broken.Copy !req
1158. We'll be put out of order for good.Copy !req
1159. All my subjects will be homeless.Copy !req
1160. But there's one who cannot
escape because she's a glitch.Copy !req
1161. Help! Somebody, help! Help!Copy !req
1162. And when
the game's plug is pulled...Copy !req
1163. No!Copy !req
1164. she'll die with it.Copy !req
1165. You don't know that will happen.Copy !req
1166. The gamers could love her.Copy !req
1167. And if they don't?Copy !req
1168. I know it's tough,Copy !req
1169. but heroes have to make
the tough choices, don't they?Copy !req
1170. She can't race, Ralph,
but she won't listen to me.Copy !req
1171. So can I count on you to
talk a little sense into her?Copy !req
1172. Very good.Copy !req
1173. I'll give you two some time alone.Copy !req
1174. I'm back!Copy !req
1175. Did you miss me?Copy !req
1176. Yeah... Uh... Can we talk for a second?Copy !req
1177. Wait. First, kneel down.Copy !req
1178. - What? No, we really...
- Will you just do it?Copy !req
1179. Okay.Copy !req
1180. - Now, close your eyes.
- Vanellope...Copy !req
1181. Shush! Close them!Copy !req
1182. Okay. Open them up.Copy !req
1183. "To Stinkbrain." Gee, thanks.Copy !req
1184. Turn it over.Copy !req
1185. I made it for you.Copy !req
1186. Just in case we don't win.Copy !req
1187. Not that I think
there's even a remote chanceCopy !req
1188. we're not going to win.Copy !req
1189. Thanks, kid. Listen...Copy !req
1190. Now rise, my royal chump.
I've got a date with destiny.Copy !req
1191. Ralph, come on. Move your molasses.Copy !req
1192. Um...Copy !req
1193. - I've been thinking.
- That's dangerous.Copy !req
1194. Who cares about
this stupid race anyway? Right?Copy !req
1195. That's not very funny, Ralph.Copy !req
1196. No, I'm serious, and it was really funCopy !req
1197. to build the car and everything...Copy !req
1198. But maybe you shouldn't do it.Copy !req
1199. Hello? Is Ralph in there?Copy !req
1200. I'd like to speak to him, please.Copy !req
1201. Look, what I'm saying is
you can't be a racer.Copy !req
1202. What?Copy !req
1203. Why would you...Copy !req
1204. Wait a minute.Copy !req
1205. No!Copy !req
1206. Where did you get this?Copy !req
1207. Look, I'm going to be
straight with you, kid.Copy !req
1208. I've been talking to King Candy.Copy !req
1209. - King Candy?
- Yeah.Copy !req
1210. You sold me out?Copy !req
1211. No, I didn't... Listen.
You don't understand.Copy !req
1212. No, I understand plenty. Traitor!Copy !req
1213. I'm not a traitor. Listen.Copy !req
1214. You're a rat!Copy !req
1215. And I don't need you, and
I can win the race on my own.Copy !req
1216. But I'm trying to save your skin, kid!Copy !req
1217. Put me down! Let me go!Copy !req
1218. No, you listen to me.Copy !req
1219. Do you know what's going to happenCopy !req
1220. when the players see you glitching?Copy !req
1221. They'll think the game's broken.Copy !req
1222. I don't care! You're a liar!Copy !req
1223. You better care, because
if your game goes out of order,Copy !req
1224. you go down with the ship, little sister!Copy !req
1225. I'm not listening to you!Copy !req
1226. Get out of my way!
I'm going to that race!Copy !req
1227. No, you're not!Copy !req
1228. Take me down from here, Ralph,
right now!Copy !req
1229. No. I'm doing this for your own good!Copy !req
1230. Wait, wait, wait.Copy !req
1231. No. No.Copy !req
1232. No, no, no, no, no!Copy !req
1233. Please, Ralph!Copy !req
1234. - No!Copy !req
1235. Stop it! Stop it! No!Copy !req
1236. You really are a bad guy.Copy !req
1237. Hello? Anybody home?Copy !req
1238. Felix? Mary?Copy !req
1239. Well, you actually went and did it.Copy !req
1240. Gene. Where is everybody?Copy !req
1241. They're gone.Copy !req
1242. After Felix went to find you
and then didn't come back...Copy !req
1243. Everyone panicked
and abandoned ship.Copy !req
1244. But I'm here now.Copy !req
1245. It's too late, Ralph.Copy !req
1246. Litwak's pulling our plug in the morning.Copy !req
1247. Oh!Copy !req
1248. But never let it be said
that I'm not a man of my word.Copy !req
1249. The place is yours, Ralph. Enjoy.Copy !req
1250. Gene, wait! Wait!Copy !req
1251. Listen, this is not what I wanted!Copy !req
1252. Well, what did you want, Ralph?Copy !req
1253. I don't know. I just...Copy !req
1254. I was just tired of
living alone in the garbage.Copy !req
1255. Well, now you can live alone
in the penthouse.Copy !req
1256. Hey, cough drop.Copy !req
1257. Explain something to me.Copy !req
1258. If Vanellope was never meant to exist,Copy !req
1259. then why is her picture on
the side of the game console?Copy !req
1260. Uh...Copy !req
1261. What's going onCopy !req
1262. in this candy-coated heart of darkness?Copy !req
1263. Nothing.Copy !req
1264. - Talk!
- No.Copy !req
1265. - I'll lick you.
- You wouldn't.Copy !req
1266. Oh, yeah?Copy !req
1267. Oh! That's like sandpaper!Copy !req
1268. Mmm. Wonder how many
licks it will takeCopy !req
1269. to get to your center.Copy !req
1270. I'll take it to my grave!Copy !req
1271. Fair enough.Copy !req
1272. Oh!Copy !req
1273. They call you
Sour Bill for a reason.Copy !req
1274. - Had enough yet?
- Okay, I'll talk, I'll talk!Copy !req
1275. Vanellope was a racerCopy !req
1276. until King Candy
tried to delete her code!Copy !req
1277. Tried to delete her code?Copy !req
1278. So that's why she's a glitch!
Why is he doing this to her?Copy !req
1279. I don't know!Copy !req
1280. Suit yourself.Copy !req
1281. No, no, no! I swear I don't know!Copy !req
1282. He literally locked up our memoriesCopy !req
1283. and I cannot remember!Copy !req
1284. Nobody can!Copy !req
1285. But I do know this.Copy !req
1286. He'll do anything
to keep her from racing.Copy !req
1287. Because if she crosses the finish line,Copy !req
1288. the game will reset and
she won't be a glitch anymore!Copy !req
1289. Where is she now?Copy !req
1290. In the fungeon with Fix-It Felix.Copy !req
1291. Felix?Copy !req
1292. I'm sorry! That's all I know, I swear!Copy !req
1293. Now, please, don't put me back
in your filthy mouth again!Copy !req
1294. Stick around.Copy !req
1295. Yes, okay, I will. I will. Thank you!Copy !req
1296. Come on. I know you're out there.Copy !req
1297. Saccharine-saturated nightmare!Copy !req
1298. But... Where?Copy !req
1299. Doomsday and Armageddon
just had a baby and it is ugly!Copy !req
1300. Hello? Hello?Copy !req
1301. Somebody! Anybody! Please let me out!Copy !req
1302. What's he say?Copy !req
1303. I'm gonna wreck it!Copy !req
1304. Why do I fix everything I touch?Copy !req
1305. Oh!Copy !req
1306. Bam!Copy !req
1307. - Felix!
- Ralph!Copy !req
1308. I'm so glad to see you!Copy !req
1309. Wait. No, I'm not. What do
you have to say for yourself!Copy !req
1310. Wait! I don't want to hear it.
I'm not talking to you!Copy !req
1311. Okay, don't talk. That's fine.Copy !req
1312. But you have to fix
this go-cart for me pronto.Copy !req
1313. I don't have to do boo!
Forgive my potty mouth.Copy !req
1314. I'm just so, so cross with you!Copy !req
1315. Do you have any idea
what you put me through?Copy !req
1316. I ran higgledy-piggledy
all over creation looking for you.Copy !req
1317. I almost drowned in chocolate milk-mix!Copy !req
1318. And then... I met the most dynamite gal.Copy !req
1319. Oh! She gives me the honey glow
something awful.Copy !req
1320. But she rebuffed my affections.Copy !req
1321. And then I got thrown in jail!Copy !req
1322. Felix, pull yourself together.Copy !req
1323. No! You don't know
what it's like to be rejectedCopy !req
1324. and treated like a criminal!Copy !req
1325. Yes, I do. That's every day of my life.Copy !req
1326. It is?Copy !req
1327. Which is why I ran off
and tried to be a good guy, but I'm not!Copy !req
1328. I'm just a bad guy, and I need your help.Copy !req
1329. There's a little girl
whose only hope is this cart.Copy !req
1330. Please, Felix, fix it.Copy !req
1331. And I promise I will never try
to be good again.Copy !req
1332. - Huh?Copy !req
1333. I know, I know, I'm an idiot.Copy !req
1334. - And?
- And a real numskull.Copy !req
1335. - And?
- A selfish diaper baby.Copy !req
1336. And?Copy !req
1337. And...Copy !req
1338. A stinkbrain?Copy !req
1339. The stinkiest brain ever.Copy !req
1340. My sweet subjects,Copy !req
1341. I can without a pinch
of hesitation assure youCopy !req
1342. that I have never been
so happy in all my lifeCopy !req
1343. to say the following words,Copy !req
1344. let the Random Roster Race
commence!Copy !req
1345. Okay, remember, you don't have to win.Copy !req
1346. Just cross that finish line,
and you'll be a real racer.Copy !req
1347. I'm already a real racer.Copy !req
1348. And I'm going to win.Copy !req
1349. - Whoa!Copy !req
1350. Have some candy.Copy !req
1351. Behind you!Copy !req
1352. In front of you!Copy !req
1353. Huh?Copy !req
1354. - It's The Glitch!
- The Glitch?Copy !req
1355. Light them up, Candlehead.Copy !req
1356. What's this? Cherry bombs!Copy !req
1357. I told you. You're just
an accident waiting to happen.Copy !req
1358. My candle!Copy !req
1359. All right. Gotta keep it under control.Copy !req
1360. No more glitching.Copy !req
1361. Okay, kid. Let's finish this thingCopy !req
1362. without any more surprises.Copy !req
1363. Ow!Copy !req
1364. Hope you're happy, junkpile.Copy !req
1365. This game is going down,
and it's all your fault.Copy !req
1366. My lady, you came back.Copy !req
1367. Can it, Fix-It!Copy !req
1368. That Cy-Bug you brought
with you multiplied.Copy !req
1369. No. It died in the taffy swamp.
Believe me, I...Copy !req
1370. Bullroar.Copy !req
1371. Listen up, people. Head to
Game Central Station now!Copy !req
1372. Move it! Let's go! Let's go!Copy !req
1373. Go! Go! Go!Copy !req
1374. No!Copy !req
1375. Huh?Copy !req
1376. Get off of my track!Copy !req
1377. Hey!Copy !req
1378. What, are you crazy!Copy !req
1379. I forbid you to cross that finish line!Copy !req
1380. Knock it off!Copy !req
1381. Ralph, look!Copy !req
1382. Kid!Copy !req
1383. Stop it!Copy !req
1384. I'm not letting you
undo all my hard work!Copy !req
1385. Is that...Copy !req
1386. No way!Copy !req
1387. What the... Who are you?Copy !req
1388. I'm Turbo, the greatest racer ever!Copy !req
1389. And I did not reprogram
this world to let youCopy !req
1390. and that halitosis-riddled warthogCopy !req
1391. take it away from me!Copy !req
1392. Turbo-tastic.Copy !req
1393. End of the line, Glitch!Copy !req
1394. Glitch. That's it.Copy !req
1395. Come on, Vanellope.Copy !req
1396. I know you said you wouldn't do it againCopy !req
1397. but you're going to do it one more time.Copy !req
1398. Just focus and concentrateCopy !req
1399. and glitch!Copy !req
1400. Sweet mother of monkey milk! I did it!Copy !req
1401. No!Copy !req
1402. Bring it home, kid!
The finish line is wide open!Copy !req
1403. No!Copy !req
1404. Kid! Are you okay?Copy !req
1405. I'm fine. I'm fine. Let's finish this race!Copy !req
1406. Oh, my land.Copy !req
1407. All right. Come on.
We gotta get out of here.Copy !req
1408. But I didn't cross the finish line!Copy !req
1409. There is no finish line!Copy !req
1410. Move it or lose it, people.
Everybody, out. Now!Copy !req
1411. Ralph, it's not going to work!Copy !req
1412. We got to try!Copy !req
1413. Kid!Copy !req
1414. Ralph, I told you I can't leave the game.Copy !req
1415. - Come on. Get through.
- Ralph! Stop!Copy !req
1416. It's got to work!Copy !req
1417. Stop, it's no use.Copy !req
1418. It's okay, Ralph.Copy !req
1419. All right, Fix-It.Copy !req
1420. That's everyone.
Now, we've got to blow up this exit.Copy !req
1421. Just go. Go without me.Copy !req
1422. - But what about this game?
- Nothing we can do about it.Copy !req
1423. Without a beacon, there's
no way to stop these monsters.Copy !req
1424. Beacon?Copy !req
1425. Stay with Felix.Copy !req
1426. Let me borrow that thing, lady.Copy !req
1427. - Ralph! Where are you going?
- I got some wrecking to do!Copy !req
1428. I'll meet you at the finish line!Copy !req
1429. No! Wait!Copy !req
1430. Fix-It, get behind me!Copy !req
1431. Come on!Copy !req
1432. One more! One...Copy !req
1433. Oh!Copy !req
1434. Welcome to the boss level!Copy !req
1435. Turbo.Copy !req
1436. Because of you, Ralph,Copy !req
1437. I'm now the most powerful
virus in the arcade!Copy !req
1438. I can take over any game I want.Copy !req
1439. I should thank youCopy !req
1440. but it would be more fun to kill you.Copy !req
1441. Get back here, little guy!Copy !req
1442. Have some candy!Copy !req
1443. Where do you think you're going?Copy !req
1444. I'm not through with you yet. Up we go!Copy !req
1445. No!Copy !req
1446. Ralph!Copy !req
1447. Fall back.Copy !req
1448. Kid!Copy !req
1449. Vanellope!Copy !req
1450. Oh, look at that. It's your little friend.Copy !req
1451. Let's watch her die together, shall we?Copy !req
1452. No!Copy !req
1453. It's game over for both of you.Copy !req
1454. No. Just for me!Copy !req
1455. Ralph!
- Vanellope!Copy !req
1456. I'm bad, and that's good.Copy !req
1457. I will never be good, and that's not bad.Copy !req
1458. There's no one I'd rather be...Copy !req
1459. than me.Copy !req
1460. Kid!Copy !req
1461. Don't worry. I got it under control.Copy !req
1462. You fools! Why are you
going into the ligh...Copy !req
1463. No! No, no, no. Yes...Copy !req
1464. No! Yes... No!Copy !req
1465. Go into the light!Copy !req
1466. Whoa!Copy !req
1467. Chocolate?Copy !req
1468. It's chocolate! I love chocolate!Copy !req
1469. - Oh, beautiful chocolate!Copy !req
1470. Yeah!Copy !req
1471. You did it, Ralph! Way to go, brother!Copy !req
1472. I... Excuse...Copy !req
1473. All fixed.Copy !req
1474. - You ready for this?
- As ready as I'll ever be.Copy !req
1475. Whoa!Copy !req
1476. What's with all the magic sparkles?Copy !req
1477. Princess Vanellope?Copy !req
1478. Now I remember.Copy !req
1479. All hail the rightful ruler
of Sugar Rush...Copy !req
1480. Princess Vanellope.Copy !req
1481. I remember. She's our princess!Copy !req
1482. Oh, that's right!Copy !req
1483. We are so sorry
about the way we treated you.Copy !req
1484. Yeah, those were jokes!Copy !req
1485. I was just doing
what Taffyta told me to do!Copy !req
1486. Tut-tut.Copy !req
1487. As your merciful princess,
I hereby decreeCopy !req
1488. that everyone who was ever
mean to me shall beCopy !req
1489. executed.Copy !req
1490. What? No, please!Copy !req
1491. Oh, my land.Copy !req
1492. Oh! This place just got interesting.Copy !req
1493. I don't want to die!Copy !req
1494. I'm just kidding. Stop crying, Taffyta.Copy !req
1495. I'm trying, but it won't stop.Copy !req
1496. Wow.Copy !req
1497. So this is the real you. Princess.Copy !req
1498. Aw, Ralph, what are you, nuts?
Come on. This isn't me.Copy !req
1499. This is me.Copy !req
1500. Huh?Copy !req
1501. Look, the code may say I'm a princessCopy !req
1502. but I know who I really am, Ralph,Copy !req
1503. I'm a racer with
the greatest superpower ever.Copy !req
1504. I was here, I was there.Copy !req
1505. I was glitching through the walls.Copy !req
1506. I'm not giving that up.Copy !req
1507. Um, pardon me for asking,Copy !req
1508. but without a princess,
who's going to lead us?Copy !req
1509. Yeah. Who?Copy !req
1510. Uh, me.
I'm thinking more along the lines ofCopy !req
1511. a constitutional democracy.Copy !req
1512. President Vanellope von Schweetz.Copy !req
1513. Has a nice ring to it, don't you think?Copy !req
1514. Fix-It, Wreck-It,
the arcade's about to open.Copy !req
1515. Let's move 'em out.Copy !req
1516. You could just stay here
and live in the castle.Copy !req
1517. You'd have your own wingCopy !req
1518. where no one would ever
complain about your stenchCopy !req
1519. or treat you bad ever again.Copy !req
1520. You could be happy.Copy !req
1521. I'm already happy.Copy !req
1522. I've got the coolest friend in the world.Copy !req
1523. And besides, I've got a job to do, too.Copy !req
1524. It may not be as fancy
as being presidentCopy !req
1525. but it's my duty.Copy !req
1526. And it's a big duty!Copy !req
1527. Ralph, are you coming, brother?Copy !req
1528. See you later, President Fart Feathers.Copy !req
1529. Au revoir, Admiral Underpants.Copy !req
1530. And farewell, Baroness Boogerface.Copy !req
1531. Goodbye, Major Body Odor!Copy !req
1532. - Hasta la vista, you...
- Ralph!Copy !req
1533. - All right. To be continued.
- Yeah!Copy !req
1534. Hooray!Copy !req
1535. I'm gonna wreck it!Copy !req
1536. Hey! Ralph's back! Isn't that great!Copy !req
1537. The gang's all here!Copy !req
1538. So, I'm happy to report,
and you'll be happy to hear,Copy !req
1539. I'm taking life one game at a time.Copy !req
1540. All right! Yeah, Ralph!Copy !req
1541. Of course,
the job hasn't changed.Copy !req
1542. But, news flash,
the Nicelanders are being nice to me!Copy !req
1543. And that got me thinking about
those poor guys left without a game.Copy !req
1544. - So here's what we did.
- We're gonna wreck it!Copy !req
1545. We asked them to help us out
on the bonus levels.Copy !req
1546. We can fix it!Copy !req
1547. I'm telling you, guys,Copy !req
1548. we haven't been this popular in years.Copy !req
1549. - It's crazy.
- Wow!Copy !req
1550. The gamers say we're "retro,"Copy !req
1551. which I think means "old but cool."Copy !req
1552. How come
we never noticed this game?Copy !req
1553. Oh, and I decided
that living in the dumpCopy !req
1554. wasn't making me feel very good,Copy !req
1555. so I cleaned it up,
built myself a little shackCopy !req
1556. and a couple for the new guys, too.Copy !req
1557. Well, with a little help from Felix. Oh!Copy !req
1558. And guess who was the best man
at his and Calhoun's wedding.Copy !req
1559. That's right, my friends,
old Ham Hands himself.Copy !req
1560. Very elegant affair.
You should've seen it.Copy !req
1561. Lot of grandeur.Copy !req
1562. And not a single bug.Copy !req
1563. Let's just say, some tears were shed.Copy !req
1564. But I got to say, the best part of my dayCopy !req
1565. is when I get thrown off the roof.Copy !req
1566. Because when the Nicelanders
lift me up,Copy !req
1567. I get a perfect view of Sugar Rush.Copy !req
1568. And I can see Vanellope racing.Copy !req
1569. Yes!Copy !req
1570. The kid's a natural.Copy !req
1571. And the players love her, glitch and all.Copy !req
1572. Just like I knew they would.Copy !req
1573. Turns out I don't need a medal
to tell me I'm a good guy.Copy !req
1574. 'Cause if that little kid likes me...Copy !req
1575. How bad can I be?Copy !req
1576. Switch on the sky
and the stars glow for youCopy !req
1577. Go see the world
'cause it's all so brand newCopy !req
1578. Don't close your eyes
'cause your future's ready to shineCopy !req
1579. It's just a matter of time
before we learn how to flyCopy !req
1580. Welcome to the rhythm of the nightCopy !req
1581. There's something in the air
you can't denyCopy !req
1582. It's been fun but now I've got to goCopy !req
1583. Life is way too short to take it slowCopy !req
1584. But before I go and hit the roadCopy !req
1585. I gotta know, 'til then
when can we do this again?Copy !req
1586. When can I see you again?Copy !req
1587. When can we do this again?Copy !req
1588. I gotta know
when can I see you again?Copy !req
1589. Joined at the hip
your sidekick needs youCopy !req
1590. Life is a trip down
the road that leads youCopy !req
1591. Look all around at the mountains
you haven't climbedCopy !req
1592. It's just a matter of time
before we learn how to flyCopy !req
1593. Welcome to the rhythm of the nightCopy !req
1594. There's something in the air
you can't denyCopy !req
1595. It's been fun but now I've got to goCopy !req
1596. Life is way too short to take it slowCopy !req
1597. But before I go and hit the roadCopy !req
1598. I gotta know, 'til then
when can we do this again?Copy !req
1599. When can I see you again?Copy !req
1600. When can we do this again?Copy !req
1601. I gotta know
When can I see you again?Copy !req
1602. Don't close your eyes
'cause your future's ready to shineCopy !req
1603. It's just a matter of time
before we learn how to flyCopy !req
1604. Welcome to the rhythm of the nightCopy !req
1605. There's something in the air
you can't denyCopy !req
1606. So let me know before I wave goodbyeCopy !req
1607. When can I see you again?Copy !req
1608. When can we do this again?Copy !req
1609. When can I see you again?Copy !req
1610. When can we do this again?Copy !req
1611. Yeah, it's been fun
but now I've got to goCopy !req
1612. Life is way too short
to take it slowCopy !req
1613. But before I go and hit the road
Tell me whenCopy !req
1614. When can I see you again?Copy !req
1615. Wreck-It Ralph is a giant of a manCopy !req
1616. Nine feet tall with really big handsCopy !req
1617. Living in a stump on his very own landCopy !req
1618. Until his world went crazyCopy !req
1619. He was minding his own business
on the day they cameCopy !req
1620. They showed a piece of paper
saying "eminent domain"Copy !req
1621. They built an apartment building
saying progress was to blameCopy !req
1622. So he got mad
And he turned badCopy !req
1623. Brick by brick
he's gonna take his land backCopy !req
1624. Wreck it, Wreck-It Ralph
As fast as you canCopy !req
1625. You know you can do it
with your colossal handsCopy !req
1626. So don't let Fix-It Felix
and that building standCopy !req
1627. I wreck it
I fix itCopy !req
1628. You fixed it!Copy !req
1629. Fix-It Felix is a really great guyCopy !req
1630. Watch him get all turbocharged
when he eats a pieCopy !req
1631. Not just a superintendent
He's a super super guyCopy !req
1632. And everybody loves himCopy !req
1633. With his trusty tool belt
and steel-toed shoesCopy !req
1634. Nicelanders believe
that Felix just can't loseCopy !req
1635. So when Wreck-It Ralph
starts to come ungluedCopy !req
1636. He doesn't get mad
'Cause he's so radCopy !req
1637. Brick by brick he's gonna build it backCopy !req
1638. Fix it, Fix-It Felix, as fast as you canCopy !req
1639. Use the magic hammer
you got from your old manCopy !req
1640. 'Cause you know Wreck-It Ralph
won't let that building standCopy !req
1641. I wreck it
I fix itCopy !req
1642. You fixed it!Copy !req