War Dogs (2016)

1. Please! Please!

2. I'm sorry, I don't speak Albanian!

3. Stop! I don't understand!

4. Do you understand now?

5. That's a Jericho 941 pointed at my head.

6. You can get one on the black market for $300.

7. Yeah.

8. It is a very reliable weapon.

9. My name is David Packouz.

10. And I'm an international arms dealer.

11. What do you know about war?

12. They'll tell you it's about patriotism, democracy

13. or some shit about the other guy hating our freedom.

14. But you want to know what it's really about?

15. What do you see?

16. A kid from Arkansas

17. doing his patriotic duty to defend his country?

18. I see a helmet, fire-retardant gloves,

19. body armor, and an M16.

20. I see $17,500.

21. That's what it costs to outfit one American soldier.

22. Over two million soldiers

23. fought in Iraq and Afghanistan.

24. It cost the American taxpayer $4.5 billion each year

25. just to pay the air conditioning bills

26. for those wars.

27. And that's what war is really about.

28. War is an economy.

29. Anybody who tells you otherwise

30. is either in on it or stupid.

31. But I didn't know that yet.

32. Back then, I didn't know anything.

33. You can't park here.

34. Uh.

35. Hey, man. I just got a client at 2150, Mr. Shore.

36. I'm a few minutes early.

37. Yeah? It's a gated community.

38. You still can't park here.

39. You probably shouldn't smoke that here, either.

40. Okay. Thanks.

41. There's a lot I could say about this period in my life

42. that would give context to this story.

43. I could tell you how

44. I dropped out of college after one semester.

45. - How's that left quad doing? - It's still sore.

46. Had a falling out with my parents.

47. How I either quit or got fired from six different jobs.

48. - That's it. - All right. There we go.

49. But looking back

50. I think the most important thing to understand is

51. I was completely lost.

52. Sorry. It fell.

53. That's okay, Gary.

54. I was 22 years old

55. massaging rich dudes in Miami Beach for 75 bucks an hour.

56. But I'd had enough.

57. It was time to change shit up.

58. And I had a big idea.

59. My plan was to sell quality bed sheets wholesale

60. to all the retirement homes in South Florida.

61. And there were hundreds of them.

62. - It feels really soft. - it should.

63. It's Egyptian cotton, 400 thread count.

64. I mean, it's pretty much top of the line for institutional use.

65. I don't know. It seems excessive.

66. Well, at $29 per unit, it's far from excessive.

67. David, do you know the average age of a resident here at Hilldale?

68. Um, no, I don't.

69. - Eighty-two years old. - Wow.

70. Have you ever seen the skin on an 82-year-old man?

71. Have you ever felt it?

72. Yeah. Actually, I'm a certified massage therapist

73. and a lot of my clients are elderly.

74. Then you should know.

75. These sheets,

76. it would be like wrapping a lizard in cashmere.

77. Would you do that?

78. Would you wrap a lizard in cashmere?

79. I guess not.

80. Then why would you expect me to?

81. My nephew.

82. He's good, right?

83. I'd sunk my entire life savings into 65 cases of premium bed sheets

84. but I overlooked one crucial factor.

85. No one really cares about old people.

86. Why don't you just sell them back?

87. It doesn't work like that. I bought them in bulk.

88. I'm so fucked.

89. You're not fucked.

90. Pete's fucked.

91. He's dead.

92. Holy shit. Is that Efraim?

93. Yeah.

94. I thought he was still in LA.

95. Me too.

96. - He was a great friend. - Thank you.

97. He looks so tan.

98. Efraim Diveroli was my best friend growing up.

99. But I hadn't seen him since he was shipped off

100. to live with his uncle in 10th grade.

101. I think our parents wanted to keep us as far apart as possible.

102. There is no table of contents in the Book of Life.

103. We don't know if we're at the beginning of a new chapter, or the end of a story.

104. Which is why we must be grateful

105. every time the page turns.

106. Did you come back just for this?

107. Fuck no! I barely knew Pete.

108. I was hoping to see you here.

109. You know your mom wouldn't give me your number?

110. What, did you call my house?

111. No, I was fucking her.

112. She still hates me, huh?

113. Yeah, most likely.

114. I missed you, bro.

115. Yeah, me too.

116. Let's go for a ride.

117. Uh...

118. I can't. I got a client at 4:00.

119. Fuck that shit. Cancel it.

120. Your boy's back in town.

121. Come on!

122. So, what happened with LA, man?

123. Why did you move back?

124. Oh, you know I was working for my uncle, right?

125. Yeah, I heard that you were, like, a gun dealer or something.

126. Pretty much. I mean,

127. we'd buy seized weapons at police auctions and resell them on the Internet.

128. Cool.

129. It was cool until my uncle scumbagged me over 70 grand.

130. Holy shit. Seventy grand?

131. Whatever. Fuck him. I made a bunch of money.

132. I decided I'd come back to Miami, start up my own shop.

133. Cool.

134. Yo, where's this guy live?

135. It's, like, five more minutes. You got somewhere you gotta be?

136. No.

137. All right. So, I can't figure out which is worse.

138. The fact that you sell bed sheets to old age homes

139. or that you jerk guys off for money.

140. For the record, I'm a licensed massage therapist, okay?

141. Totally legit.

142. Okay. But at the end, the guys have to come, right?

143. Like, on your chest or whatever?

144. You know what? Fuck you.

145. Fuck you, buddy.

146. Bro, do you remember the last time we went to buy weed together?

147. Of course I do. it was fucking traumatic.

148. Yeah, but do you remember the next day, when we walked into school

149. and everybody knew that we got arrested?

150. Yeah, we were gangsters, bro.

151. We thought we ran South Beach.

152. We did run yeshiva.

153. We didn't take shit from anyone.

154. Yeah, I miss that.

155. You miss yeshiva?

156. No, I miss

157. not taking shit from anyone.

158. Yo!

159. He out. You looking for weed?

160. Depends. You got good shit?

161. Put it this way. I sell him his shit.

162. What's up with this nigga, man?

163. Cool. Can you do an ounce?

164. Yeah, no sweat. Three bills.

165. Three hundred. I like it.

166. You get the better price when you come direct to the distributor.

167. I guess so.

168. All right.

169. Yeah, so, she opened the door.

170. And I'm like, "Yo. Chill. I ain't about that drama."

171. You know what I mean?

172. "I know you got another nigga in the crib."

173. What's up?

174. What?

175. Can I get the shit?

176. What shit?

177. I just gave you $300 for some weed.

178. Any of you niggas ever seen this motherfucker before?

179. I ain't seen shit.

180. Man, get the fuck out of here.

181. - All right. All right, okay. - Yeah, yeah.

182. This White boy Wild.

183. Parachute pants.

184. Looking like Jay Leno and shit.

185. Look like he going to church.

186. Yo, yo, hold up, hold up, man.

187. What the fuck. Shit!

188. Come on! Where's everybody going?

189. I thought we were gonna hang out.

190. What a bunch of assholes.

191. What the fuck was that? Are you crazy?

192. It's cool, bro.

193. I have a Class 3 Firearms license.

194. - Huh? - Come on, get in.

195. I know another dealer nearby.

196. It's weird. We were the same age, but I always looked up to Efraim.

197. When life kicked me, I stayed down.

198. But not Efraim. He kicked back.

199. Mr. President, we want to thank you

200. for visiting us here today.

201. We are honored to be serving our country,

202. and proud to welcome you,

203. our wartime Commander in Chief...

204. - Hey. - Hey, sweetie.

205. How was the funeral?

206. It was amazing.

207. Oh, my God. You're so stoned, aren't you?

208. Huh? What?

209. You just described a funeral as "amazing."

210. What? No. The funeral was really sad.

211. Yeah, everyone was totally bummed out.

212. But I ran into my friend from growing up.

213. The guy I told you about. Efraim Diveroli?

214. The one you got arrested with?

215. Yeah. I mean, we did some other stuff too, but...

216. Anyway, he just moved back to Miami.

217. That's great, right?

218. Yeah. I'm supposed to swing by his office tomorrow.

219. We're gonna grab lunch.

220. - Okay. - Are you hungry?

221. - Hmm? - I'm so hungry.

222. - We don't have much here. - Oh.

223. - I mean, we have pizza. - Really?

224. - And nachos. - We have nachos?

225. And ice cream.

226. Wait, what? We never have ice cream.

227. You're fucking with me, aren't you?

228. That is so mean.

229. That was so easy.

230. Hello?

231. Hello, Mr. Borstein. This is David Packouz.

232. You told me to call today at 11:00.

233. I have those bed sheets with me, and I would love for you to take a look.

234. Uh, sir, if you give me the chance

235. I am confident that your residents

236. will appreciate the difference.

237. It's an expense we can't justify, and we're just not interested.

238. Uh-huh.

239. Okay, well, thank you for your time.

240. Yeah, this is contract specialist

241. Lindsey Michaels from Army Command, Picatinny.

242. That's right.

243. Yeah, I sent out a solicitation for some 249s for Basra

244. and we seem to have misplaced your paperwork.

245. Great. So if you can go ahead and just re-email me those numbers.

246. Actually, you know what? On second thought,

247. we're about to make a decision on those RFPs.

248. Why don't you go ahead and just give me your bid

249. while I got you here on the phone?

250. Uh-huh.

251. And does that include mags?

252. Great. Yes, sir.

253. You keep supplying the guns, we'll keep killing the bad guys.

254. God bless you.

255. What a fucking tool. What's up, bro?

256. Yo, what's up, man? What was that all about?

257. Oh, that was me impersonating an army officer.

258. Really? What for?

259. To find out what my competitor's bidding on a contract.

260. It's fucking genius.

261. I thought that you said you sold,

262. like, seized weapons to gun nuts on the Internet.

263. Not anymore.

264. Now I only sell to one gun nut.

265. Oh, yeah? Which one?

266. The U.S. Military, motherfucker.

267. Wanna do a bong hit?

268. Pretty sick, huh?

269. So what, you sell these things to the Pentagon?

270. I sell all kinds of shit to the Pentagon.

271. Guns, bullets, body armor.

272. Last week, I shipped 400 gas masks to American Special Forces in Iraq.

273. No shit.

274. How long you been doing this for?

275. Two, three months.

276. And you make good money?

277. Oh! Fuck, man.

278. Put it this way. I did over 200K in the past eight weeks.

279. And I'm only telling you that because you're my boy.

280. I'm not bragging.

281. Holy shit.

282. Yeah. Check this out.

283. Fed Biz Opps stands for Federal Business Opportunities.

284. Think eBay, but for war.

285. - They buy tanks on here? - Bro, they buy everything on here.

286. It was crazy.

287. The government had a public website

288. containing every military contract currently up for bidding.

289. But I skip the big ticket items, and look for the small-ball shit

290. that giant defense contractors ignore.

291. Everybody's fighting over the same pie.

292. But they're ignoring the crumbs.

293. I live on crumbs, like a rat.

294. And when you're dealing with the Pentagon, crumbs are worth millions.

295. These listings seemed to go on forever.

296. And according to Efraim, they did.

297. Thanks, man.

298. So, I don't get it.

299. If there's an entire defense industry,

300. why would the Pentagon want to buy anything from you?

301. They don't want to, they have to.

302. Remember Little League?

303. How, at the end of the season, they'd give out that big MVP trophy

304. and that one kid would always win it?

305. Yeah, Evan Talbot.

306. Right. But then, one year, somebody's mom complained?

307. Then they had to give everybody a little trophy so they wouldn't feel bad?

308. Even that fat retarded kid, Robbie Friedman, got one.

309. That's kind of like what's happening here.

310. I'm still confused, man.

311. The Pentagon fucked up when they were rebuilding the Iraqi Army.

312. They gave all these no-bid contracts to Cheney's boys, and they got caught.

313. So Bush started this initiative to level the playing field

314. and now every Pentagon purchase, every gun, every grenade,

315. every bullet, gets offered to small businesses for bidding.

316. And sure, the big dogs still get the big trophies.

317. But the Pentagon's got to give little trophies

318. to all the Robbie Friedmans of the world.

319. So, basically, you're a fat retarded kid.

320. Bro, I'm the fattest and most retarded.

321. In a speech today,

322. President Bush said that contrary to reports

323. he has no plans to attack Iran.

324. The President said, "That's ridiculous.

325. "We didn't even have plans when we attacked Iraq."

326. David.

327. Yeah?

328. Remember a few weeks ago, in the car on the way home from my mom's house?

329. Yes. Yes, I do.

330. Well, this happened.

331. How the fuck are you going to feed a baby?

332. Have you even thought about this?

333. What are you going to do?

334. Jerk men off the rest of your life?

335. Yeah, that's the plan. I'm gonna feed my kid by jerking men off.

336. Sorry.

337. Okay, good. Well, at least you thought it through.

338. It's not funny.

339. Dude, I am so fucked.

340. I think you should come work for me.

341. What are you talking about?

342. Seriously, I need the help.

343. David, look at me.

344. Bush opened the floodgates in Iraq.

345. It's a fucking gold rush.

346. That's really nice of you, Efraim.

347. Fuck nice! Who cares about nice?

348. I've been looking to bring somebody on for a while now.

349. The problem is, I don't trust anyone.

350. But you're my boy.

351. I mean, no offense, but I'm against this war.

352. Me and Iz are going to rallies and signing petitions.

353. Yeah, dude, I'm against the war too.

354. I fucking hate Bush.

355. But this isn't about being pro-war.

356. The war is happening.

357. This is about being pro-money.

358. The more Efraim talked, the more it made sense.

359. Besides, compared to my other prospects,

360. this was the chance of a lifetime.

361. My only issue was, what would I tell Iz?

362. I think it's a great idea.

363. So I lied.

364. You know I've always believed in this business.

365. I told her that Efraim had great contacts in the government.

366. And instead of selling bed sheets

367. to penny-pinching retirement homes

368. we'd now be selling sheets to the free-spending,

369. overfunded U.S. Military.

370. It's genius.

371. I had to lie. Iz hated the war.

372. She had two cousins serving in Iraq.

373. She also hated the mountain of bed sheets that were taking up half our apartment.

374. I spent the next six weeks in a crash course on arms dealing.

375. The Herstal 556 light machine gun.

376. Belgian, but made under license in lots of places.

377. When it came to this shit, Efraim knew everything.

378. Makes, models, weights, where it was made.

379. Remember, there's been an arms embargo against China since Tiananmen Square.

380. And if there was an angle to be played,

381. he knew about that too.

382. You have to read between the lines with this stuff.

383. All the money is made between the lines.

384. I'd spend my entire day scouring the government's website,

385. searching for overlooked contracts that we could squeeze our way into.

386. Hey, I think I got something.

387. Hey, Georgia, I gotta call you back.

388. And then, in the middle of the night

389. we'd be back in the office, working the phones.

390. Forging relationships

391. with weapon manufacturers all over Eastern Europe.

392. No, David Packouz from AEY.

393. I told Iz we were doing conference calls with sheet suppliers in Pakistan.

394. They called guys like us war dogs.

395. Bottom feeders who make money off of war

396. without ever stepping foot on the battlefield.

397. It was meant to be derogatory, but we kinda liked it.

398. You fucking scumbag piece of shit!

399. Drown, motherfucker, drown!

400. Very nice.

401. Ralph Slutsky was Efraim's silent partner.

402. He was a local businessman

403. who owned 14 dry cleaners all across Miami.

404. Why didn't anybody tell me the mister is broken?

405. Ralph put up the money to back the deals in exchange for 25% of the company.

406. Or at least what he thought was 25%.

407. We're doing God's work, Ralph.

408. We really are.

409. You know, every Jew owes a debt to Israel.

410. In my mind, this is not a metaphorical debt.

411. Ralph was under the impression

412. that Efraim was an observant Jew

413. who only dealt arms as a means

414. to protect Israel from her enemies.

415. Beautifully said.

416. Did you happen to catch last Friday's Torah portion?

417. - One of my favorites. - Same here.

418. It reminds me so much of this story I once read.

419. About a young man traveling to Pinsk.

420. And that was Efraim's genius.

421. He would figure out who someone wanted him to be

422. and he would become that person.

423. Ah!

424. And he's got, like, 20,000 of them.

425. Great. Where did you find this guy?

426. You remember Victor in the Ukraine?

427. Yeah, the one with the Mk3s?

428. Yeah. He turned me on to this company in Cyprus.

429. It's run by this guy, Henry Girard.

430. Henry Girard?

431. Yeah, you know him?

432. You spoke to Henry Girard?

433. A couple of times. Why? Who is he?

434. Dude, for the last 20 years, this guy has basically supplied

435. both sides of every conflict on the planet.

436. He's a fucking animal.

437. Really? Why is he calling me?

438. Because he's a fucking animal.

439. It's all money and it all matters.

440. Hey, mami, where are you going?

441. I'm trying to find my friends.

442. You want to make some money?

443. Excuse me?

444. I'll give you $1,000 right now

445. if we fast forward to our third date.

446. What does that even mean?

447. It means we just had a great dinner, maybe met your friends for some drinks

448. and now you're about to blow me in my car.

449. Can we just get right to that part?

450. Who the fuck are you?

451. Efraim Diveroli.

452. That's my best friend, David.

453. And we're international arms dealers.

454. But you already know that

455. because we're on our third date.

456. - What's going on? - Nothing, bro.

457. I'm about to get out of here with my girl.

458. What the fuck, man!

459. on, my God.

460. That guy was not fucking around.

461. Yeah, you probably should have picked a different girl.

462. Fuck that, it almost worked.

463. Hey, do you remember when you fought Eric Moscowitz in sixth grade?

464. Yeah, he did that windmill thing with his arms.

465. That was the sickest. He was unbeatable.

466. You remember that shit?

467. That's it.

468. Dude, he would have killed me if you didn't jump in.

469. Probably. Mmm.

470. Hey, I never said "thank you."

471. For everything.

472. Come on, you know how much you've helped me out lately.

473. It's cool. You don't have to make it weird, all right?

474. Hey, can we order some food?

475. Mami, come on. I could have gone to Cuba and back.

476. Met the family, grabbed a couple sandwiches.

477. I'd be done by now.

478. Hello?

479. Yes, sir. Sorry, I wasn't expecting a work call this late.

480. Right, of course. It's 9:00 a.m. in Baghdad.

481. Who is it?

482. That's great news, Captain Santos.

483. Yes, sir.

484. We're going to get right on that.

485. Thank you. Bye.

486. What?

487. We just got the Beretta deal.

488. Get the fuck out of here.

489. I swear to God.

490. The Beretta deal was massive.

491. It was 10 times bigger than anything we'd closed so far.

492. This was next level shit.

493. That's what I'm fucking talking about!

494. That's real money, motherfucker! Fuck!

495. Do you realize we're going to make 600K

496. on this fucking thing?

497. Holy shit.

498. David, your 30% is $180,000.

499. Holy fucking shit!

500. It was amazing.

501. I'd been working with Efraim for two months

502. and was already about to make more money

503. than a lifetime of massages.

504. Listen.

505. What is that?

506. That's your baby's heartbeat.

507. Wow.

508. Can you believe how fast it is?

509. - Is that normal? - Totally normal.

510. Fetuses have a much faster heart rate than we do.

511. Look.

512. So, you guys want to know the sex?

513. We keep going back and forth on it.

514. - What do you think? - Um...

515. This is work. I have to take it.

516. I'm so sorry.

517. This is David.

518. This is Captain Santos in Baghdad

519. checking on the delivery status of my Berettas.

520. Captain, good to hear from you.

521. Yes, we are on target. All good.

522. Great. I was worried

523. those guns were coming direct out of Italy.

524. Absolutely. They are, sir.

525. Packouz, please tell me

526. you're aware of the legislation the Italians passed last week.

527. The one banning all arms shipments to Iraq.

528. I had no clue what he was talking about.

529. But this was a huge fucking problem.

530. Berettas are an Italian gun.

531. Made and manufactured in Italy.

532. Uh...

533. Of course.

534. I am. I've been on the phone

535. for the last three days, making other arrangements.

536. Great. That's what I wanted to hear.

537. Iraqi police force is depending on you.

538. Well, you tell them AEY has got them covered.

539. - Outstanding. - Thanks, Captain. Talk soon.

540. Everything okay?

541. Yeah. Yeah, everything's fine.

542. What happened? We done already?

543. Yeah. Guess what?

544. It's a girl.

545. Baby-

546. Okay. At least I hit something.

547. Seriously, what the fuck are we going to do?

548. Relax, bro.

549. Should I just call him back and tell him the truth?

550. When does telling the truth ever help anybody?

551. Efraim, we can't dick around with this guy

552. and then not deliver.

553. We're going to deliver. I already figured it out.

554. We use Jordan.

555. Jordan Goldfarb?

556. Jordan...

557. Jordan the country.

558. It shares a border with Iraq. It's a U.S. ally.

559. And most importantly, there's no embargo.

560. Okay, so what do we tell the Italians?

561. Fuck them! As far as they're concerned

562. they're sending 5,000 Berettas to a country they have no issue with.

563. All we have to do is ship the guns

564. from Jordan to Baghdad.

565. It's called circumvention.

566. Is that legal?

567. It's not illegal.

568. Want to try?

569. How did that charity thing go?

570. It was 5K, right?

571. It was supposed to be a 5K.

572. Uh, I finished about 1 K of it.

573. So, I should probably return four-fifths of the money.

574. So, Andrew told me

575. you and Efraim are working together now?

576. Really?

577. Yeah, I told her about the sheet thing.

578. Yeah. Efraim has some contacts with the government.

579. So we're just combining forces right now.

580. Yeah, just... Just be careful with him.

581. - Emily, don't. - What?

582. How do you mean?

583. Well, his cousin, Rebecca, is an old friend of mine.

584. We went to camp together.

585. And she told me that he stole $70,000 from her father.

586. Whoa, really?

587. That's interesting.

588. I actually heard it was the other way around.

589. That his uncle is the one who stole the money from him.

590. See? You don't know.

591. Everyone has their own version of a story.

592. No, I'm pretty certain.

593. Their whole family stopped talking to him over it.

594. Yo! Why aren't you answering your phone?

595. Hey, what's up, man?

596. Fuck is this?

597. Everyone, this is David's business partner, Efraim.

598. - Hey, man. - Hey, man.

599. Bro, could I talk to you outside for a minute?

600. - It's urgent. - Yeah, of course.

601. And for the record, I'm also his best friend,

602. so probably should have been invited to whatever this is.

603. Look, these are her friends. This is her dinner party.

604. Rosen is her friend now? That Jew fuck?

605. Trust me, you don't want to be here.

606. I don't want to be here, all right?

607. Now, what's going on?

608. Jordanian customs seized our Berettas.

609. - What? Why? - I don't fucking know, David.

610. I dropped out of high school

611. before they covered international diplomacy.

612. - Who's that? - Fuck, it's Santos.

613. He knows!

614. Pick it up, I want to listen.

615. - Pick... Pick up the fucking phone. - This is David.

616. Yeah, I just heard my guns are being held up in Jordan.

617. Captain Santos, yes, there's been a slight hiccup.

618. What are they even doing in Jordan?

619. Not to worry.

620. They're in a hangar in Amman. Totally safe.

621. My team and I are working on a solution right now.

622. You didn't answer my question.

623. What the fuck are my guns doing in Jordan?

624. Captain Santos, this is Efraim Diveroli.

625. President of AEY, sir.

626. David has apprised me of the situation

627. and we are looking at options as we speak.

628. Options? What kind of options?

629. Well, are you familiar with the Corvus TP19?

630. That's Brazilian and it's shit.

631. Contract says Berettas, I want Berettas.

632. Sir, I need you to work with us a little on this.

633. Let me get this straight.

634. I'm in the ass crack of the world, defending your freedom.

635. And I got to work with you shit bags?

636. Look, I don't know

637. if those Berettas are really in Amman

638. or if you're just trying to goose your profits

639. like every other piece of shit in your miserable, rat-fuck profession.

640. Either way, you're endangering my mission.

641. I'm shutting you down.

642. I'm canceling you for cause.

643. Getting canceled for cause was a death sentence.

644. It meant we would never win another contract.

645. Captain, please do not do that.

646. I know you're upset.

647. But from one Christian to another

648. my wife and I are having serious financial problems.

649. Our son, Lucas, is in the hospital.

650. Medical bills are through the roof.

651. If you do this, it'll ruin me. It'll ruin my family.

652. As God as my witness,

653. I will get you your guns.

654. Hello?

655. What a fucking piece of shit! Do you believe this fucking guy?

656. - Fuck. - What's going on?

657. What guns, David?

658. Are you fucking kidding me?

659. You told me you guys were selling bed sheets.

660. Yeah, and I also told you that we're selling other stuff too.

661. I thought you meant pillows!

662. Look, I can't support a kid by giving massages.

663. Okay? And nobody was buying the bed sheets.

664. No, David, you lied to me.

665. Because I know how you feel about the war.

666. I thought we both felt that way!

667. I'm five months pregnant!

668. And it's a problem if I can't trust the man

669. I'm having a baby with!

670. - Of course you can trust me. - Really?

671. Because five minutes ago,

672. I didn't even know you were an arms dealer!

673. I'm not an arms dealer.

674. What we do is perfectly legal.

675. We work for the government. We're middlemen.

676. We don't touch the guns, we don't see the guns.

677. We never even leave the office.

678. Hey, sorry to interrupt. It's time sensitive.

679. David, do you have a passport?

680. What? Yeah, why?

681. We have to go to Jordan. Like, ASAP.

682. Straighten this shit out.

683. We gotta talk, whatever, okay?

684. Yeah.

685. Yo, you window or aisle?

686. - Excuse me, sorry. - Yeah, we just landed.

687. Excuse me. The Embassy call?

688. Excuse me. Okay, bye.

689. - Sorry, kind of an emergency. - Excuse me. Sorry.

690. Don't worry, I have to go first. I'm American.

691. I'm sorry.

692. The American Embassy offered little to no help

693. in dealing with the Ministry of Customs.

694. So we took matters into our own hands.

695. He says your permit has expired

696. and that you can't fly your crates out of Jordan without one.

697. Yeah, we know. That's why we're here.

698. Look, we were told that you know people in the government,

699. that maybe you can help us out.

700. He says it will take six weeks to get a new permit.

701. Yeah, that's the issue. We don't have six weeks.

702. We need our guns today.

703. Look, I don't want to come off as the ugly American here.

704. And maybe I don't understand the rituals of your culture

705. but this feels like the moment

706. where we are supposed to offer him a gift, am I correct?

707. - You are correct. - All right.

708. $1,400 US. CODY?

709. Cool, man.

710. Could have just started with that, you know, saved all this bullshit.

711. I like your shades.

712. Tell him I'll give him 100 bucks for those shades.

713. Tell him in gibberish.

714. No way. Alligator.

715. Yeah, I know. I...

716. It's Lacoste. It's actually a crocodile.

717. I like fancy shit, that's my thing.

718. Tell him.

719. For three days, we didn't hear anything.

720. It was ridiculous.

721. Our entire business was riding on the word of an 11-year-old translator.

722. Motherfucker! He ripped us off!

723. We don't know that yet.

724. No! I know what it feels like to fuck somebody.

725. I also know what it feels like to get fucked by somebody.

726. And we just got fucked.

727. You need to chill out.

728. How am I supposed to chill out, David?

729. We're in a Muslim country, I can't even get a blowjob!

730. It's embarrassing!

731. It's chaos here! Fuck!

732. Yeah.

733. Right now?

734. We're coming down.

735. That was Aladdin. They're in the lobby.

736. See that? Come on.

737. Hold on. Are you fucking kidding me?

738. What's the problem?

739. You wanted your guns back, he got you your guns back.

740. What? No, we said we needed a permit to fly them to Iraq.

741. Exactly, but you don't need a permit to drive them.

742. You expect us to drive them to Iraq?

743. Why not? Marlboro is the best smuggler in all of Jordan.

744. Who, this?

745. This is the best smuggler in all of Jordan?

746. Yeah, he drives to Baghdad three, four times a month.

747. Efraim, you want to weigh in here?

748. Yo, how far is it to Baghdad?

749. - Why are you asking him that? - 800 kilometers.

750. And he knows what he's doing?

751. Efraim, stop.

752. - 100% the best. - Come on.

753. It's like 500 miles. We'll be there by morning.

754. You seriously want to drive to Baghdad?

755. David, we're gunrunners.

756. Let's go run some fucking guns.

757. Let's go.

758. Come on.

759. Hey, seriously, is this safe? Driving to Baghdad?

760. Yes, very safe.

761. 50-50.

762. 50-50? What, like 50% we live, 50% we die?

763. Yes. That is why we drive through night.

764. It is much safer.

765. How much safer?

766. 50-50.

767. Bro, what the fuck!

768. Obviously, he doesn't know what 50-50 means.

769. Oh, my God.

770. Hey, what about gas though? It's a long trip, no?

771. No problem. Petrol free in Iraq.

772. No kidding.

773. - Free gas? - Yeah.

774. See what I'm talking about? Iraq is dope.

775. I'm thinking about getting a place there.

776. Free gas.

777. Fucking cool, man.

778. What is that?

779. What?

780. You don't see that?

781. What the fuck?

782. Hey, why are you slowing down, man?

783. It's okay, it's okay.

784. What's okay?

785. Whoa, whoa. What the fuck, bro?

786. It's okay. Border.

787. What, this?

788. Fuck.

789. - Jesus. - Put down.

790. - Huh? - Put down.

791. Whoa, whoa.

792. Cigarettes.

793. For you.

794. Welcome.

795. It was fucking surreal.

796. Six months ago, I was a massage therapist in Miami Beach.

797. And now, here I was, driving a truckload of guns

798. through the Iraqi desert

799. with my best friend from junior high.

800. Marlboro?

801. Hey, Marlboro?

802. Bro!

803. There's a dead body in the gas station!

804. What the fuck!

805. Where are we? Where's Marlboro?

806. Did you not hear what I just said?

807. There's a fucking dead body in there, man!

808. Yes, I heard you.

809. All right, we're in a war zone, bro.

810. There's dead bodies, relax.

811. All right, I gotta take a leak.

812. What?

813. Be careful.

814. I'm good, bro. I know how to take a piss, all right?

815. Shit.

816. Fuck.

817. - Hello? - Hey.

818. Hey, babe, is everything okay?

819. Yeah.

820. What time is it there?

821. It's, uh, 7:30 in the morning.

822. Shit, did I wake you?

823. No, I'm just at the hotel. We're about to have some breakfast.

824. Listen, I'm not saying I like it,

825. but I get why you're doing this.

826. You do?

827. This whole time I never thought about what you must be going through.

828. All the pressure you're under.

829. It's just the lying that kills me.

830. It makes me feel like I'm in this alone.

831. No, you're not in this alone.

832. I need you to know that you can tell me anything, David.

833. We're partners, remember?

834. David?

835. Yeah, I gotta call you right back.

836. - Is everything okay? - Yeah, everything's fine.

837. I'm just going to call you fightback, okay?

838. I love you. Bye.

839. Efraim!

840. Efraim!

841. - What? - Look!

842. Marlboro!

843. Fuck! What the fuck, bro.

844. Holy shit, they have guns, man!

845. I know!

846. Go, go! Come on.

847. What the fuck! it won't start!

848. Where the fuck is Marlboro?

849. - I got it! - Go! Go!

850. No, no, no!

851. Wait, wait, wait!

852. Wait! No!

853. Run, motherfucker! Jump in!

854. Holy shit! They're getting closer. Come on, man. Go!

855. Go, go!

856. Come on!

857. Are you kidding me?

858. We stopped for gas in Fallujah?

859. You cheap fuck!

860. Go!

861. Fuck you, Marlboro!

862. Fuck.

863. Fuck. Fuck.

864. We're gonna die!

865. You wanted to drive to Baghdad, you asshole!

866. They're stopping.

867. What the fuck? Look.

868. Holy fuck, bro.

869. Oh, fuck! All right!

870. God bless Dick Cheney's America!

871. Look at this fucking place. Oh, my God.

872. Excuse me, sir?

873. What?

874. There are some guys here to see you.

875. Some guys?

876. What kind of guys?

877. Hey, Marlboro!

878. Give us a smile, gorgeous.

879. Let me see those pearly yellows.

880. You're like an Iraqi Tom Selleck, bro.

881. You guys are AEY?

882. Yes, sir. David Packouz.

883. This is my colleague, Efraim Diveroli.

884. We spoke on the phone.

885. I remember.

886. You drove these?

887. Through the Triangle of Death?

888. Fucking A right we did.

889. Kip, take these boys over to the cage, get them paid.

890. Right away, sir.

891. I was wrong about you two.

892. Great fucking job, boys.

893. Great fucking job.

894. Holy shit, the Triangle of Death, bro?

895. That's right. That's the AEY guarantee, bitch.

896. We drive through all triangles, including your mom's.

897. Hey, Kip, snap a photo of us, pal.

898. All right.

899. Ready?

900. - How's my hair? - It's good, slicked back.

901. Thank you.

902. - Got you. - Let me see it.

903. Helmut fucking Newton over here.

904. All right, man.

905. - Perfect. - All right, all right.

906. Let's go get fucking paid.

907. Holy shit.

908. Crazy, right? $12.2 billion.

909. It's all seized from the godfather himself.

910. You guys call Saddam Hussein the godfather?

911. Look at all this cash, bro. What would you call him?

912. $2.8 million.

913. - Just sign here. - You got it.

914. We got a military escort to the airport

915. and got the fuck out of Baghdad.

916. There was almost $3 million in cash

917. stuffed into our Army-issued duffel bags.

918. You might think after barely surviving Iraq

919. that we'd be done.

920. But you'd be wrong.

921. You see, the Beretta deal put us on the map.

922. After that, we started killing it.

923. We bought matching Porsches.

924. We bought two apartments in the same building.

925. Oh, my God.

926. Holy shit, bro.

927. DAVID; Oh!

928. Whoo!

929. Ralph was so happy with his returns

930. that he increased his original investment

931. in AEY by $10 million.

932. That gave us enough capital to pursue more deals

933. and expand the company.

934. Which is exactly what we did.

935. I cannot stress this enough.

936. You need to be scouring this website.

937. Day and night.

938. It is updated by the minute.

939. There are tens of thousands of solicitations on this website.

940. Each one is 40 to 50 pages long.

941. If you see something interesting,

942. you bring it to me.

943. If you bring it to me,

944. I'll make you rich.

945. Fact, 18 months ago,

946. David here was jerking off guys for money.

947. Actually, that is not a fact.

948. That is absolutely a fact.

949. Now he drives a Porsche.

950. And that's all because of AEY.

951. Do you have any questions?

952. Um, I have a question.

953. What does AEY stand for?

954. What do you mean? Like morally?

955. No, I mean what do the letters mean?

956. That's fucking...

957. What does IBM stand for? Nothing.

958. It just... It just sounds professional.

959. Uh, actually, IBM stands for International Business Machines.

960. What did you say?

961. IBM stands for International Business Machines.

962. Get the fuck out of here.

963. I'm serious. You're not going to work here.

964. Get the fuck out of my office, you fucking nerd!

965. Go!

966. And for the record, AEY doesn't stand for anything.

967. Fuck! What a dick.

968. Does anybody else have any questions?

969. Sleep. I got her.

970. All right. All right.

971. Hi.

972. I know.

973. I know. It's okay.

974. Okay.

975. What?

976. 360, 000 SVD sniper rifles.

977. 1,084,000 GP-30 grenades.

978. 45,000 SKO aviation rockets.

979. The Pentagon's arming the Afghans for the next 30 years.

980. They're building a whole army.

981. Wait, that's got to be a typo.

982. It's not.

983. 100 million rounds of AK-47 ammo?

984. Bro, these aren't crumbs.

985. This is the whole fucking pie.

986. Among defense contractors,

987. this would come to be known as the Afghan deal.

988. It would be the biggest opportunity

989. AEY would ever see.

990. We had to go for it.

991. So, where do you go to arm an entire country?

992. Vegas X is where military and manufacturers

993. come together to unveil the latest in warfare.

994. It's like Comic-Con with grenades.

995. Sure, most of these guys didn't know who AEY was.

996. But we saw that as an advantage.

997. - You got your list? - Got it.

998. - You feel good? - Yeah, I feel pretty good.

999. You know, this is different than doing business on the phone.

1000. When they look at us, they're going to see two kids.

1001. So we have to show them our balls.

1002. Got it.

1003. We need to be fucking thugs, you understand?

1004. Understood.

1005. All right, good. Let's kill this shit.

1006. But it was a complete disaster.

1007. We quickly learned that

1008. even if we could land the Afghan deal,

1009. it would be a logistical nightmare.

1010. Jerry, good to see you.

1011. To source a deal of this magnitude

1012. would mean piecing together

1013. multiple vendors from all around the world.

1014. Whoa, whoa.

1015. Get out of here.

1016. It would require dozens of shipping outfits

1017. and hundreds of permits.

1018. We need 100 million rounds.

1019. All that could be okay for a major defense contractor.

1020. But not for us.

1021. Honestly, we were out of our league.

1022. Change $10,000.

1023. Any luck today?

1024. Efraim!

1025. What's up, bro?

1026. Where you been? Why aren't you answering your phone?

1027. I'm with a prostitute. What's up?

1028. Okay, you need to get dressed and come with me right now.

1029. All right, uh, give me

1030. 38 minutes.

1031. Efraim, Henry Girard is down at the bar, waiting for us.

1032. Get the fuck out of here.

1033. I'm dead serious.

1034. Shit.

1035. Okay.

1036. Henry Girard was a legend among arms dealers.

1037. When they hung Saddam Hussein for crimes against humanity

1038. it was said that Henry sold them the rope.

1039. Hey, Henry, sorry I'm late.

1040. This is my partner I was telling you about.

1041. - Efraim Diveroli. - Nice to meet you.

1042. It's an absolute pleasure.

1043. Henry has a dinner in 10 minutes,

1044. but I wanted you to hear this firsthand.

1045. I showed him the list and he can help.

1046. Great. With which part?

1047. All of it.

1048. He can fill the whole order.

1049. - The whole order? - Mmm-hmm.

1050. Even the AK ammo?

1051. Not a problem.

1052. You do know it's 100 million rounds, right?

1053. Henry has contacts in Albania.

1054. Albania?

1055. They spent decades preparing for a Western invasion that never came.

1056. That country is one giant arsenal.

1057. It's all just sitting there.

1058. Tell him the best part.

1059. They're in the process of joining NATO,

1060. so they have to dispose of all of their Soviet era weapons.

1061. They are literally dismantling it and turning it into scrap.

1062. I can get most of the shit for pennies on the dollar.

1063. Now, tell him the other best part.

1064. You're looking at the exclusive agent for the whole fucking thing.

1065. This was the magic bullet.

1066. One supplier who could fill the entire Afghan deal.

1067. This wouldn't just put us in contention.

1068. We might actually win this thing.

1069. Sorry, I have a question.

1070. Sure.

1071. With that kind of hookup

1072. why don't you just bid on the contract yourself?

1073. Full disclosure?

1074. I'm barred from doing any business with the U.S. government.

1075. I'm on a watch list.

1076. Like a terrorist watch list?

1077. Mmm-hmm.

1078. - Got it. - Wait, what?

1079. Okay, how much for the AK ammo?

1080. - 10 cents a round. - That's fucking amazing.

1081. And what about shipping?

1082. You can get llyushin 76 through Russian pilots.

1083. 80K per flight.

1084. I'm sorry, you're on a terrorist watch list?

1085. What the fuck!

1086. Do you work for Homeland Security? Relax, bro.

1087. You two should probably talk this over.

1088. We will. But we are very interested.

1089. Good. My flight leaves tomorrow morning at 10:00.

1090. I can't spend more than 48 hours in this dump.

1091. That's what I always say. Vegas is a two-day town.

1092. I was talking about America.

1093. We're talking exclusive access to a stockpile

1094. of Soviet Bloc non-standard weapons and ammo.

1095. That's going to win this deal for us.

1096. He's on a terrorist watch list!

1097. Whatever. People end up on that list for bringing scissors onto an airplane!

1098. That's not why he's on the list.

1099. Look, the Pentagon wants 100 million rounds of AK-47 ammo

1100. in the middle of a worldwide shortage.

1101. Where do you think they think that's going to come from?

1102. A bunch of shady motherfuckers like that guy.

1103. This is the job.

1104. To do business with the people in places

1105. the U.S. government can't do business with directly.

1106. It's as simple as that.

1107. Fuck!

1108. Hey, boys.

1109. So we discussed it, and we'd like to move forward.

1110. Fantastic. Congratulations.

1111. - But we have to see the merchandise. - Oh, of course.

1112. On site, in person.

1113. You guys ever been to Albania?

1114. Honestly, until last night

1115. I didn't even know it was a real fucking country.

1116. Oh, it's a beautiful place.

1117. Come on in. I'll call my guy and we'll set it up.

1118. Albania is a lot of things.

1119. But a beautiful place is not one of them.

1120. It took us three separate flights

1121. and 22 hours just to get there.

1122. Henry's people sent a driver

1123. to pick us up at the airport

1124. and the guy would not stop talking.

1125. I fall over, she revive me.

1126. But none of that diminished Efraim's enthusiasm.

1127. He really believed this could be the answer.

1128. Welcome, AEY.

1129. I am Yili Pinari,

1130. head of Albania's largest military export company.

1131. Efraim Diveroli. Good to see you.

1132. This is my business associate, David Packouz.

1133. - Glad to meet you. - How you doing?

1134. Uh...

1135. Thank you for the sign.

1136. Oh. It's for you.

1137. Yes, I know. I said thank you for the sign.

1138. So, show us what you got.

1139. What is this place?

1140. Storage for the Albanian army.

1141. We have 700 more like it across the country.

1142. You have 700 warehouses like this?

1143. Not just warehouse.

1144. We use church, hospital, school.

1145. Albania is most armed country in the world.

1146. Hey, that's cool. Congrats, bro.

1147. It was like a fucking museum in there.

1148. Most of this shit hadn't seen daylight

1149. since the Cold War.

1150. But that didn't matter to us.

1151. All we cared about was the AK ammo.

1152. It's okay. We have plenty of what you came for.

1153. All these containers are filled with your bullets.

1154. What do you mean, all the bullets are right here?

1155. 126 million rounds.

1156. Fuck me.

1157. Yeah. Fuck us all.

1158. How old are these?

1159. 30, maybe 40 years. AK-47 bullets

1160. can last forever if properly stored.

1161. Right. Well, how were these stored?

1162. Uh, who gives a fuck how these were stored?

1163. All that matters is they fucking work.

1164. Do they work?

1165. You try.

1166. They fucking worked.

1167. The entire defense industry was scrambling over this deal.

1168. And the key to it was sitting in 23 shipping containers

1169. in the back of a rusted out warehouse on the other side of the world.

1170. We got back with just enough time

1171. to submit our bid before the government's deadline.

1172. And then we waited.

1173. We waited five months.

1174. Pa.

1175. David!

1176. - Is that Efraim? - What?

1177. - Is it? - David!

1178. We fucking won!

1179. Holy shit. We won the Afghan deal.

1180. - What? - We won the Afghan deal!

1181. - We won? - We fucking won!

1182. Bro! Are you fucking kidding me?

1183. - We fucking won! - Yeah, motherfucker!

1184. Yeah! Yeah, motherfucker!

1185. Before we could begin,

1186. AEY still needed to be vetted by the government.

1187. It's a pain-in-the ass process

1188. involving three separate audits

1189. and an in-person interview.

1190. The audits were the biggest hurdle.

1191. I mean, we didn't even have a real bookkeeper.

1192. We didn't have real books.

1193. We had to fabricate AEY's accounting

1194. going back three years.

1195. Ledgers, bank statements, phony purchase orders,

1196. we forged it all.

1197. Two weeks later, we were in Rock Island,

1198. Illinois for our big meeting

1199. with procurement officers from the U.S. Military.

1200. We were pretty fucking nervous.

1201. So Efraim thought it'd be a good idea to get high in the parking lot.

1202. Hold up.

1203. Does it sound like we're more than two people right now?

1204. Yeah.

1205. It was really strong shit.

1206. Okay.

1207. This is very impressive.

1208. Very impressive.

1209. Frankly, we were a tad concerned with your performance history

1210. against a deal of this size.

1211. But after meeting you two face to face,

1212. we feel like we're in good hands on this one.

1213. Well, we won't let you down,

1214. sirs.

1215. Not to mention,

1216. your bid was far too attractive for us to pass up.

1217. Thank you. I mean, that's great to hear because we really worked hard on this.

1218. Sorry. Excuse me.

1219. One of you just said

1220. our bid was too attractive to pass up.

1221. What did you mean by that, exactly?

1222. He means you boys lowballed the shit out of your competition.

1223. Yeah. Uh...

1224. By how much?

1225. Millions.

1226. Okay.

1227. Just for me. l...

1228. I'm curious, how many millions?

1229. Well, technically, we're not supposed to discuss that with you,

1230. but what the hell.

1231. You guys came in $53 million lower than the nearest competition.

1232. Fuck! Fuck!

1233. Motherfucker!

1234. $53 million.

1235. We're okay.

1236. Look at the bright side.

1237. For once, the American taxpayer

1238. is getting a good deal on a defense contract.

1239. Man, fuck the American taxpayer.

1240. Hello?

1241. Iz?

1242. Hey, Ella. Hi.

1243. How are you, sweetie?

1244. Hey. Do you know where her blue sandals are?

1245. Oh, hey.

1246. Um, I'm not sure.

1247. But listen, can we talk for a sec?

1248. Mmm-hmm.

1249. I need to go back to Albania for a couple weeks.

1250. A month, tops.

1251. Sure. No problem.

1252. Hey, what's going on?

1253. Ella and I are going to stay with my mom for a while.

1254. What? What are you talking about?

1255. Iz, what happened?

1256. How come you didn't tell me you went to Iraq?

1257. I was looking for the plumber's number

1258. on your computer and I saw the photos.

1259. I can explain.

1260. You said you never left the hotel room in Jordan.

1261. I know. Because I didn't want to freak you out.

1262. Why is it every time I catch you in a lie

1263. you try to convince me that you lied for my benefit?

1264. At what point do you just admit you're a liar?

1265. Iz, would you stop, please?

1266. We said we'd tell each other everything.

1267. - You promised! - I know! Okay, I fucked up.

1268. What else aren't you telling me?

1269. - Nothing. - No.

1270. Seriously.

1271. You know everything now.

1272. Okay. Aren't you going to ask me why I called the plumber?

1273. Yeah, sure. What happened?

1274. The pipe is leaking in the guest bathroom.

1275. I found this.

1276. Let me guess. You didn't want to freak me out?

1277. Okay, hold on.

1278. So I hid some money under the sink.

1279. What's the big deal?

1280. The big deal is you hid it from me!

1281. No, I didn't!

1282. Then who did you hide it from?

1283. I don't know. It was stupid. You're right.

1284. We're going to leave before you think of something else to say.

1285. Iz, I'm sorry.

1286. Iz!

1287. Oh, fuck.

1288. Hey, what's up, man?

1289. What's up?

1290. Just getting ready to leave.

1291. What is that?

1292. I just wanted to thank you for agreeing to go on this trip.

1293. It's not lost on me,

1294. the sacrifice you're making for this company.

1295. And I really appreciate it.

1296. "To my partner, David. The world is yours."

1297. - it's from Scarf ace. - Of course, man. I remember.

1298. Thank you.

1299. Yeah.

1300. Uh, hey, before I go,

1301. I just wanted...

1302. What's this?

1303. It's our partnership agreement. 70-30.

1304. I just wanted to make it official.

1305. Yeah, of course.

1306. - It's a good idea. - Cool.

1307. Man, eight fucking weeks in Albania.

1308. Iz is going to hate me forever.

1309. No, she's going to suck your cock every day for a year.

1310. Because we're on the verge of making $30 million.

1311. Yeah, man.

1312. Go crush it.

1313. Thanks, bro.

1314. Nice.

1315. Hey, you've reached Iz. You know what to do.

1316. Come on, Iz. Don't cut me off like this.

1317. I'm in Albania, at the hotel.

1318. Left the number with your mom.

1319. And if you could please just call me back

1320. because I really miss you. Okay?

1321. And I love you.

1322. Bye.

1323. Good morning, buddy.

1324. Hey, Bashkim.

1325. Oh, I bring you Kolonat. It's our McDonald's.

1326. Yeah, I'm good. But thanks.

1327. We go to work now?

1328. Uh-huh. No, no, no. I said I need two trucks.

1329. Yeah, you just got the one here right now.

1330. Yeah. Look, I got a cargo plane sitting at the airport.

1331. Yeah, I know. I know.

1332. Hey, let me call you right back.

1333. Hey, stop! Stop, stop!

1334. Hold up, hold up, hold up! Hey, turn that off!

1335. What the fuck is that?

1336. Where did you get this?

1337. Yo! What's up?

1338. Hey, man, we got a problem.

1339. - Where you at? - I'm at Liv, bro.

1340. Trying to bang some Cuban chick who's waiting for me at my table.

1341. Why, what do we got?

1342. Let me get this straight. I'm in Albania right now

1343. freezing my ass off.

1344. You're at Liv, trying to get laid?

1345. David, it's 1:00 a.m. here.

1346. I'm blowing off some steam.

1347. Yeah, 1:00 a.m. is when you're supposed to be at the office

1348. because that's the middle of fucking day

1349. in every country we do business with.

1350. Look, we got a problem with the AK ammunition.

1351. - What kind of problem? - It's Chinese.

1352. Chinese, bro? What does that even mean, Chinese?

1353. It means it's from China.

1354. What are you talking about? I was there, I saw the ammo.

1355. We both did.

1356. Yeah, look, I don't know what to tell you.

1357. They fucked us. Okay? We got played.

1358. Hold on. How do you even know it's Chinese?

1359. There's Chinese writing on every fucking crate.

1360. Trust me, it's Chinese.

1361. Yeah.

1362. Henry, what the fuck!

1363. We've been trying to reach you for two days!

1364. It's Efraim and David.

1365. We have a serious fucking problem.

1366. I'm listening.

1367. The AK ammunition, it's Chinese.

1368. What, you think the Afghans who are getting

1369. shot up by the Taliban give a shit where their ammo comes from?

1370. No, but the Pentagon does.

1371. Henry, you know we can't use Chinese!

1372. America has an embargo against China.

1373. You had your boys show us the one crate of Albanian ammo in the entire country.

1374. I'm sorry, did anyone prevent you from inspecting the other crates?

1375. Did you even bother to ask what the country of origin was?

1376. Who the fuck would ask that?

1377. Henry, I'm staring at 100 million rounds

1378. of illegal Chinese ammunition that you sold us.

1379. What are we supposed to do?

1380. Do your fucking job!

1381. The U.S. government wants to look the other way.

1382. Don't give them a reason not to.

1383. And while you're at it, learn the difference between

1384. "We have a problem" and "You have a problem."

1385. Fuck!

1386. We were fucked. The ammo was worthless

1387. and I was stuck in Albania trying to piece together new suppliers

1388. from all over Eastern Europe.

1389. Holy shit.

1390. What the fuck are you doing here, man?

1391. I have a big idea.

1392. How did you get in my room?

1393. They let me in.

1394. I'm a trustworthy guy.

1395. Not only did they let me in, they brought me room service.

1396. Anyway, I have a big fucking idea.

1397. Yeah? What's that?

1398. What if we repack?

1399. Repack what?

1400. The bullets!

1401. What if we repack them all?

1402. 100 million rounds?

1403. David, it can be done.

1404. Think about it. We'll also save a fortune on shipping.

1405. We trade out all the big, heavy wooden crates

1406. for light cardboard boxes.

1407. Yeah, but it would still be Chinese ammo.

1408. Look at this towel. Okay?

1409. Turkish. Made in Turkey.

1410. Not anymore. Now it's an Albanian towel.

1411. It's only Chinese if the packaging says it's Chinese.

1412. Yeah. But I mean, that's also fucking illegal, man.

1413. We have two options.

1414. We either repack this shit and send it off

1415. or we can walk away from a $300 million-deal.

1416. What do you want to do?

1417. When you put it like that there's really only one option.

1418. Our driver Bashkim introduced us to his friend

1419. who owned a boxing and storage company out of Tirana.

1420. This is Enver. I grew up with him.

1421. Nice to meet you, Enver.

1422. You too. Bashkim told me a little about your situation.

1423. Yeah, look, to put it simply, we have a weight problem.

1424. We're shipping a large quantity of ammunition

1425. from Albania to Afghanistan.

1426. Right now, it's packed in heavy tins

1427. inside big wooden crates.

1428. And what we would like to do

1429. is to transfer those bullets into plastic bags

1430. and then put those in double-walled,

1431. corrugated fiberboard boxes.

1432. Do you know what those are?

1433. Yeah, of course. For what reason?

1434. We just told you.

1435. What the fuck is it with this country?

1436. The original packaging, it's too heavy.

1437. Too many crates. We need to streamline.

1438. Okay. How many crates?

1439. A lot. It's 100 million rounds of ammunition.

1440. Understood. But how many actual crates?

1441. We have 68,520 crates.

1442. I've seen it.

1443. It's fucking crazy.

1444. Done.

1445. So 50 men, eight weeks.

1446. I can do it for $100,000.

1447. 100,000 U.S. dollars?

1448. Yeah.

1449. - Give us a second. - Yeah. One second, please.

1450. Okay. I'm going to talk very seriously.

1451. It was hard not to laugh.

1452. I mean, not only was this guy saving the entire deal,

1453. but by repacking all the ammo

1454. we would increase our profit margin by almost $3 million.

1455. Where should we get dinner tonight?

1456. There's this place by the hotel. It's pretty good.

1457. Okay. All right, go ahead.

1458. Okay, deal.

1459. It was even better than we thought.

1460. We were trading heavy wooden crates for light cardboard boxes.

1461. Eight ounce tins for plastic bags.

1462. By repacking the ammo,

1463. we would lighten our overall load by 180 tons.

1464. 180 fucking tons!

1465. That meant fewer flights using lighter planes burning less fuel.

1466. Which all added up to more money for us.

1467. On December 8th, 2007,

1468. AEY delivered the first 5 million rounds

1469. to the Afghan army.

1470. It went off without a hitch.

1471. Come on, just say it once, sweetie. Come on.

1472. Say "dada." Say "dada."

1473. We really have to go, David.

1474. No, hey, five more minutes, please? Please?

1475. We're about to eat. My mom's waiting.

1476. Ella, wave goodbye to Daddy. Hmm.

1477. Bye-bye, Ella.

1478. Merry Christmas. I love you.

1479. Hey, can you give her to your mom so that we can talk for a minute?

1480. I'm sorry, David.

1481. We'll call you in a couple days. Okay?

1482. Bye.

1483. Hey, this is David.

1484. Bro, you want to hear something totally fucked up?

1485. Merry Christmas, Efraim.

1486. It's Christmas?

1487. That's why nobody's here.

1488. I was about to fire the entire office.

1489. Anyway, when I was over there,

1490. I was talking to our boy, Bashkim.

1491. Did you know his uncle

1492. works at the Albanian defense ministry?

1493. No, I didn't know that.

1494. Well, he does.

1495. So I said, "You know what would be interesting to me, Bashkim?

1496. "I'd be curious to know what Henry is paying the Albanians for the AK ammo."

1497. Efraim?

1498. Do you know what he found out?

1499. That motherfucker is paying two and a half cents a round.

1500. He's charging us a 400% markup!

1501. Yeah. So what? We do the same thing.

1502. Yeah, but this is our contract.

1503. And we almost lost it because of him and his Chinese fucking bullets.

1504. But we didn't lose it.

1505. That's not the point!

1506. I want to figure out a way to cut this cocksucker out of the deal.

1507. Efraim, stop.

1508. No, listen to me.

1509. I'm serious, man.

1510. We're making money, okay?

1511. He's making money, the whole thing is fucking working.

1512. Don't mess with it.

1513. I don't give a fuck. He's ripping us off!

1514. Look, I'm serious, okay?

1515. I'm going to be on the next flight out of here if you pull that shit.

1516. Whoa. Bro, you don't have to threaten me.

1517. All right? I'm your partner.

1518. Yeah, it doesn't always feel like that.

1519. I found this deal. And I'm over here

1520. doing all the work and you're in Miami trying to sabotage it.

1521. How am I sabotaging it?

1522. By trying to fuck over Henry, the way you fuck over everybody else.

1523. You're right. Henry's our partner.

1524. He's the reason we got this deal.

1525. I was just looking out for us and I took it too far.

1526. Don't sweat it, bro. I'll leave it alone.

1527. Thank you.

1528. We can't push our luck with this shit, man.

1529. All right, I'll talk to you soon. Bye.

1530. Whoa. What the fuck? Hey.

1531. Fuck! Stop.

1532. Stop! I don't understand!

1533. Do you understand now?

1534. Yeah. Yes.

1535. Did you really think you could cut me out of my own deal?

1536. Please.

1537. Fuck.

1538. Fuck.

1539. David, we need to talk.

1540. Now's not a good time.

1541. I have not been paid yet.

1542. What do you mean? Like for the month?

1543. Even

1544. You haven't been paid anything?

1545. Your partner doesn't return phone calls.

1546. My guys need to be paid.

1547. They are going to stop work.

1548. David, I know the real reason

1549. that you want ammunition repacked.

1550. Okay, look, Enver. Listen to me.

1551. I gotta fly to Miami right now. I'll be back in a week.

1552. But I promise you,

1553. the first thing that I'm going do when I land

1554. is make sure you get your money wired, okay?

1555. Okay.

1556. David.

1557. Airport, let's go.

1558. David.

1559. Look, I'm late for a flight. I'll be back next week.

1560. She said her husband didn't come home last night.

1561. Okay, what do you want me to do?

1562. She's very worried. It is not like him.

1563. Tell her I don't know her husband.

1564. Who's your husband?

1565. Bashkim.

1566. No one ever heard from Bashkim again.

1567. They never found a note, they never found a body.

1568. He just fell off the planet.

1569. I was done with Albania.

1570. I was never going back.

1571. Hi.

1572. Hey-

1573. The reason I went to Albania was to repackage Chinese ammunition

1574. so we could disguise it and sell it to the U.S. government.

1575. That sounds illegal.

1576. It is. But I'm done.

1577. I swear, no matter what happens for the rest of my life

1578. I'm never going to lie to you again.

1579. Mmm-hmm.

1580. I love you so much, Iz.

1581. What happened to your nose?

1582. I was kidnapped by Albanian gangsters.

1583. - I think it's broken. - Oh, my God.

1584. I think I'm going to go back to being a massage therapist.

1585. Is that okay?

1586. Yes.

1587. It was always okay.

1588. Hey, you're back.

1589. Whoa!

1590. Bro, what are you doing back? What happened to your face?

1591. That's everything that's been delivered on the Afghan deal.

1592. I want my cut. I'm out.

1593. What are you talking about?

1594. He put a fucking gun to my head, man.

1595. Who, Henry?

1596. You said that you were going to leave it alone.

1597. Oh, fuck.

1598. I fucked up.

1599. I'm done, Efraim.

1600. Look, you don't have to go back.

1601. I hired this new guy, Ivan.

1602. - He speaks Albanian. - I'm done.

1603. What, do you think I just got 4 million bucks laying around?

1604. I've thought it through.

1605. I'll take 40 cents on the dollar.

1606. Yeah, I thought it through too.

1607. How about this?

1608. How about zero cents on the dollar?

1609. Let me remind you that we have a contract.

1610. Fuck your contract!

1611. If I asked you to build me a house,

1612. and you quit after building me half a house,

1613. you think I owe you half the money?

1614. Is this a fucking joke, David?

1615. You have two weeks. Otherwise, you'll hear from my lawyer.

1616. Who, Warren?

1617. Are you talking about Warren? He's my lawyer too.

1618. I introduced you to him.

1619. Fucking Warren.

1620. Fuck!

1621. AEY. How may I direct your call?

1622. We fight.

1623. Fight with our families,

1624. fight with our business associates.

1625. Sometimes we fight with our friends.

1626. If God were here,

1627. we'd probably fight with Him too.

1628. Efraim has a heavy heart over what's happened.

1629. No offense, Ralph, but I'm not sure you've ever met the real Efraim.

1630. He's a complicated young man.

1631. But he just wants to sit down and talk.

1632. Find a fair solution.

1633. He's asked me to mediate.

1634. Let me help you, David.

1635. I just don't know if I'm ready yet.

1636. All right, here he is.

1637. Hey, bro.

1638. Good to see you.

1639. Sorry things have gotten so crazy.

1640. Yeah. Me too.

1641. You having anything, hon?

1642. I'll just have a coffee. Thanks.

1643. I've thought about it a lot.

1644. And I don't want you to walk away from this empty-handed.

1645. Cool.

1646. So I had Warren draft up a severance agreement.

1647. And I think it's pretty fair.

1648. I'm prepared to pay you 50K per year for the next four years.

1649. 200 grand?

1650. Is this a fucking joke, man?

1651. Is this what you meant by mediation?

1652. In all fairness, there was never

1653. a partnership agreement, no prior contract.

1654. Yeah. I have something better than a partnership agreement.

1655. I have proof.

1656. Before I left Albania, I took everything.

1657. What the fuck.

1658. All the documents we forged, photos of repacking.

1659. - David! - Repacking?

1660. - He didn't tell you? - David!

1661. Oh, yeah, we took that money you gave us,

1662. and we bought 100 million rounds of illegal Chinese ammunition,

1663. then we repackaged it and sold it to the U.S. Military.

1664. Yeah, and we made $8 million doing it, asshole.

1665. Careful, Efraim.

1666. We told Ralph we only made $3 million on that one.

1667. Wait, what now?

1668. He sends you fake accounting reports every month.

1669. - Oh, fuck off. - I make them on my laptop.

1670. Now you're just making shit up.

1671. Really? Because I kept everything, you dumb fuck!

1672. I even have copies of the bank statements that we photoshopped

1673. and sent to the government.

1674. Get the fuck out of here.

1675. I can bury you.

1676. Us.

1677. I think you meant to say,

1678. you can bury us.

1679. Because anything that implicates me,

1680. implicates you as well.

1681. - Efraim, wait. - No,no, no.

1682. I came here today prepared to pay you $200,000.

1683. Now I'm not even going to pay for breakfast.

1684. Oh. What's going on over here? Huh?

1685. Hello?

1686. May I speak with David Packouz?

1687. - Yeah, who's this? - Hi, David.

1688. This is C. J. Chivers with The New York Times.

1689. I was wondering if you had a minute to talk about AEY,

1690. and the alleged repackaging of Chinese ammunition.

1691. I don't know what you're talking about.

1692. Well, according to my source, there's an ongoing investigation

1693. at the State Department.

1694. And I was hoping to get some clarification...

1695. David, this sounds pretty serious.

1696. Yeah, I know.

1697. Maybe you should call my uncle.

1698. The lawyer.

1699. Oh, my God. Okay.

1700. That's a good idea.

1701. Hey, give me a minute. I'll meet you guys in the lobby.

1702. You just get a call from The New York Times?

1703. Yeah.

1704. Me too.

1705. You know, Scarf ace was on TV last night,

1706. and I was watching it and thinking about when we were little

1707. and we used to do the lines from the movie.

1708. You're my best friend, David.

1709. God, I really fucked this up, didn't I?

1710. I'm sorry, bro.

1711. Wow.

1712. Are you ever not acting, man?

1713. What does that mean?

1714. You just tell me what you think I want to hear,

1715. because The New York Times called,

1716. and you're freaking out that I might say something.

1717. Just admit it.

1718. We were never best friends.

1719. You were just playing the part of my best friend.

1720. Yeah.

1721. Scarf ace wasn't even on TV last night.

1722. You're such a piece of shit.

1723. - Fuck! - Fuck you.

1724. - Fuck. - Little bitch.

1725. Well, that saves us a trip.

1726. Out of all the illegal shit we did,

1727. all the lies we told the government,

1728. in the end, the thing that did us in?

1729. Yes, I'm trying to reach the Department of Defense, please.

1730. Efraim never paid the box guy.

1731. To who do you report a crime?

1732. After Enver called the Pentagon,

1733. the State Department launched a full-scale investigation,

1734. that went on for months.

1735. They busted Ralph at one of his shops in the middle of a work day.

1736. He was horrified and couldn't make a deal fast enough.

1737. All that bullshit about him wanting to mediate a truce between Efraim and I...

1738. It was a setup.

1739. Oh, yeah, we took that money you gave us,

1740. and we bought 100 million rounds of illegal Chinese ammunition,

1741. then we repackaged it and sold it to the U.S. Military.

1742. They had us dead to rights.

1743. It was pathetic.

1744. While going through Efraim's computer, they even found a to-do list that said,

1745. "Repackage Chinese ammo."

1746. The story tonight that has Pentagon officials scrambling.

1747. How did two 20-something young men land a big Pentagon contract?

1748. Federal agents arrested

1749. both men last week, charging them with fraud

1750. for selling outdated, defective Chinese ammunition

1751. to the Pentagon.

1752. Efraim was charged with over 70 federal crimes

1753. and sentenced to four years in prison.

1754. I pled guilty and was sentenced to seven months house arrest.

1755. Congress called the Afghanistan contract a case study

1756. in all that is wrong with the government's procurement process.

1757. In 2022, AEY will be eligible once again to bid on Federal contracts.

1758. How's it going?

1759. It's okay.

1760. If I wanted you dead, you'd already be dead.

1761. I guess it's going all right then.

1762. Come in.

1763. How's your baby?

1764. It's a girl, right?

1765. Yeah. She's good.

1766. I got three.

1767. All girls.

1768. They tell you it gets better.

1769. That's not true, it gets worse.

1770. That's why I like the arms business.

1771. No women.

1772. I want to apologize about Albania.

1773. I had bad information.

1774. So you stuffed me in the trunk of a car and shoved a gun in my face by mistake?

1775. Yeah.

1776. I'm not a bad man, but in certain situations,

1777. I have to ask myself,

1778. what would a bad man do?

1779. I appreciate you leaving my name out of your testimony.

1780. I didn't really see a reason to include it.

1781. Yeah, but still.

1782. Can I ask you a question?

1783. Sure.

1784. When we met in Vegas at the blackjack table,

1785. was that a coincidence?

1786. What do you think?

1787. Can I ask you another question?

1788. My driver in Albania went missing.

1789. Do you know what happened to him?

1790. It's a piece of my end on the Afghan deal.

1791. It's for you.

1792. No more questions.

1793. English - SDH