1. In America we have laws,Copy !req
2. laws against killing,
laws against stealing.Copy !req
3. And it's just accepted that
as a member of American society,Copy !req
4. you will live by these laws.Copy !req
5. In West Canaan, Texas, there is
another society which has its own laws.Copy !req
6. Football is a way of life.Copy !req
7. That's me as a kid,
playing ball with my best friends.Copy !req
8. I'm Jonathan Moxon,
but most people call me Mox.Copy !req
9. As a boy growing up
in West Canaan, Texas,Copy !req
10. you never question
the sanctity of football.Copy !req
11. You just listen to what the coaches said
and tried as best as you could to win.Copy !req
12. Win at all costs.Copy !req
13. Good morning, West Canaan.
Creighton Miles here,Copy !req
14. looking forward to seeing you tonight
at Bud Kilmer StadiumCopy !req
15. as the Coyotes take on
the Bingville Bulls.Copy !req
16. Kick-off time 7:30.Copy !req
17. There'll be a victory celebration
immediately following the game.Copy !req
18. Think you'll play tonight?Copy !req
19. - Do I ever play?
- No, but...Copy !req
20. Lance is the best quarterback
in the state.Copy !req
21. Why would we want anyone
but him to play?Copy !req
22. Well, maybe if you guys are running
up the score, or what if Lance gets hurt?Copy !req
23. Hey, don't even think about
Lance going down.Copy !req
24. That would be a disaster.Copy !req
25. In fact, as a man of the cross,
or in your case,Copy !req
26. a man on the cross, I ask you to pray
for the health of Lance Harbor.Copy !req
27. Son, did you pray for playing time?Copy !req
28. - Yeah, I just spoke to Jesus upstairs.
- What?Copy !req
29. The crucified 11-year-old
living in my room.Copy !req
30. - Is Kyle strapped to that cross again?
- Yup.Copy !req
31. Kyle! Why is he so difficult?Copy !req
32. Kyle, what is it with the cross?Copy !req
33. I'm preparing to die for all of man's sins.Copy !req
34. That's so sweet, honey.Copy !req
35. I want it off, now!Copy !req
36. How's your brother supposed to
concentrate on tonight's gameCopy !req
37. with you running around with
this whole deal strapped to your back?Copy !req
38. - Dad, he's just experimenting.
- Enough! I'm serious.Copy !req
39. Now, we all need to concentrate
on tonight's game!Copy !req
40. - That's probably Billy Bob.
- Mo!Copy !req
41. Hey, Mox, you skinny ass bitch, let's roll!Copy !req
42. Come on, man!
Let's get in the truck! Let's go!Copy !req
43. Come on, Mox, earn it!
Come on! You got it!Copy !req
44. Come on. You're almost there!
Here we go!Copy !req
45. You got it! Park it, baby, yeah!Copy !req
46. You tell him, Bacon!Copy !req
47. All right, Bacon, off in the flatbed.Copy !req
48. Hey, hey! Come on, man. Hey, Billy Bob!Copy !req
49. Good boy.Copy !req
50. Billy Bob, I'm telling you, man,Copy !req
51. this swine fucks up my new suit, man,
he's road ham!Copy !req
52. I'm sorry, Wendell. Just kick him off.Copy !req
53. Hey. I'm gonna toss your pig ass
out on the street! Move over!Copy !req
54. - I love that dog.
- I think it's a pig.Copy !req
55. Yeah.Copy !req
56. I love you, brother.Copy !req
57. I had the most beautiful dream
last night.Copy !req
58. Well, all right.Copy !req
59. Hey, you need anything, big guy,
you let me know. Come on.Copy !req
60. - Tweeter, let's go!
- Yeah!Copy !req
61. Come on, Tweeter! Let's go, dog!Copy !req
62. Good mooning, boys, good mooning!Copy !req
63. I been up since the crack of dawn,
and I had to ask you a question.Copy !req
64. - What is up with Carrie-Anne Baker?
- Darcy's friend?Copy !req
65. Oh, my God! She's got this look!Copy !req
66. Like, "I just fell out of
the I-wanna-suck-your-dick treeCopy !req
67. "and hit every branch on the way down."Copy !req
68. - Relax, man, you got to focus.
- I can't focus. I need to get some ass!Copy !req
69. I need to hit some ass!Copy !req
70. I'm about to fuck your pig!
How about that?Copy !req
71. Give me a kiss!Copy !req
72. Tonight, we play Bingville.Copy !req
73. Tonight, we beat Bingville!Copy !req
74. In my 30 years of coaching
at West Canaan,Copy !req
75. I have brought two state titles
and 22 district championships!Copy !req
76. Count them!Copy !req
77. And this year, God willing
with your support for this great team,Copy !req
78. I will bring number 23!Copy !req
79. - Go, pack! Go, pack! Go, pack!
- Yeah!Copy !req
80. Yeah!Copy !req
81. Now I present to you our captain,
quarterback Lance Harbor.Copy !req
82. Let's hear it!Copy !req
83. - Hey.
- Hey, you.Copy !req
84. I swear Kilmer gets off on this.
He's made your brother a god.Copy !req
85. I was lying in bed last nightCopy !req
86. and I drifted off to sleep,
and I had a dreamCopy !req
87. that we were beating Bingville 14-3.Copy !req
88. But I woke up kind of sad,Copy !req
89. but then I cheered up when I realized
it was only a dream, becauseCopy !req
90. I know we'll beat Bingville
by way more than that.Copy !req
91. Tell me this insanity is over
in a few weeks.Copy !req
92. Five more games.
No more football, no more Kilmer,Copy !req
93. and, if I get into Brown,
no more West Canaan.Copy !req
94. No more games on Friday nights?Copy !req
95. You don't like games on Friday nights?Copy !req
96. I like trains better.Copy !req
97. Really? You wanna watch trains tonight?Copy !req
98. Sure.Copy !req
99. Hi, everybody. This is Creighton Miles,Copy !req
100. the voice of West Canaan
High School football.Copy !req
101. And the Coyotes tonight will play
the Bingville BullsCopy !req
102. and then try the state undefeated.Copy !req
103. Joining me in the booth is
Stubby "Stud Daddy" Tanner,Copy !req
104. former defensive great for the Coyotes.Copy !req
105. Welcome to the booth.
Do you have a few words for the folks?Copy !req
106. Well, just one thing
for those Bingville fans.Copy !req
107. If their granny lives in Bingville,
you better tell her to move,Copy !req
108. 'cause the Coyotes are coming
to burn her house down.Copy !req
109. And yea though I walk through
the valley of the shadow of death,Copy !req
110. I will fear no faggots from Bingville.Copy !req
111. And yea though I walk through
the valley of the shadow of death...Copy !req
112. All right. Stay loose, Mox.Copy !req
113. You never know
when Kilmer might play you.Copy !req
114. Yeah.Copy !req
115. Bingville don't stand no chance
And Bingville can't see my danceCopy !req
116. You wanna see the new Tweeter
end-zone dance?Copy !req
117. Check it out.Copy !req
118. - You know what it's called?
- Hell yeah, Tweeter!Copy !req
119. - What?
- The new Tweeter end-zone dance.Copy !req
120. Here I come.Copy !req
121. Stick.Copy !req
122. Set! Hut 18!Copy !req
123. Hut 19! Go!Copy !req
124. Lance Harbor, two-year all-state,
what a night he's having.Copy !req
125. Twins right. Now get in there.Copy !req
126. Come on down fifth!
Take it in now, yeah!Copy !req
127. Come on, let's go!Copy !req
128. Go!Copy !req
129. Hey, Sammy. That's about
the most action your boy's seen, isn't it?Copy !req
130. - Coyotes on the lip of the cup.
- We're punching it in for six.Copy !req
131. Set! Go!Copy !req
132. Billy Bob?Copy !req
133. Billy Bob! Trainer!Copy !req
134. Billy Bob, you all right?Copy !req
135. - Did we score?
- Yeah, Billy Bob, we got the six.Copy !req
136. How many fingers?Copy !req
137. - Three?
- Wait a minute. Hold on.Copy !req
138. It's got to be true or false.Copy !req
139. Billy Bob, the man's holding up
some fingers, true or false?Copy !req
140. True?Copy !req
141. He's all right, Coach.Copy !req
142. - Come on, boy!
- He's all right.Copy !req
143. If your daddy hadn't played his heart
out for me, I'd cut your ass.Copy !req
144. Well, that was a good thing tonight!
Good thing tonight!Copy !req
145. Good pass, Bo. Johnny and Robert.Copy !req
146. Defense in third quarter, excellent effort.
Where's the game ball?Copy !req
147. The game ball goes to,
surprise-surprise, Lance Harbor.Copy !req
148. Get yourself another shelf.
Pretty good running the ball, Wendell.Copy !req
149. Really not bad, boy. How you feeling?Copy !req
150. Dog tired. It's my knee.Copy !req
151. Never show weakness.
Never show weakness.Copy !req
152. The only pain that matters
is the pain you inflict.Copy !req
153. Look at Billy Bob. He got enough heart
for all y'all. Look at this old boy.Copy !req
154. - Four more games.
- Yup. Hang in there, man.Copy !req
155. You're doing fine.Copy !req
156. Hey, Tweeter. Hey, man, you got any?
My knee's killing me.Copy !req
157. Sweetness. 500 milligrams?Copy !req
158. - How many can I have?
- Keep them. I got more at home.Copy !req
159. this team needs is a lot more effort...Copy !req
160. What is this shit? I'm not interested
in your fucking muscles.Copy !req
161. - Maybe that's what happened...
- Kilmer.Copy !req
162. in the fourth quarter. You're looking off
in the goddamn stands!Copy !req
163. What a fucking asshole, huh?Copy !req
164. I'm telling you, there's people here thatCopy !req
165. - are not focused on this fucking game!
- I'm getting fucked up tonight.Copy !req
166. - Yup, I'm getting fucked up.
- I ain't just talking about you.Copy !req
167. I'm talking to other people, too!Copy !req
168. Come on, Bacon. That's it, baby.
Be a good dog, here you go.Copy !req
169. There you go. You chug it! Chug it!Copy !req
170. And what do you mean
is he a boy or a girl?Copy !req
171. Of course he's a boy.
Look at the size of that sausage!Copy !req
172. Isn't that right, boy? Hey!
Look at the size of that sausage!Copy !req
173. Baby, I just got so excited thinking
about next yearCopy !req
174. and Florida State and the future.Copy !req
175. I think I need to be your wide receiver.Copy !req
176. Really, baby? Here?Copy !req
177. Not here, here, but somewhere here.Copy !req
178. Come on.Copy !req
179. Now how come
you never dress like that?Copy !req
180. Costs a lot of money to look that cheap.Copy !req
181. Well, no, she's pretty sharp.
She pulls A's.Copy !req
182. - That's not all she pulls.
- I'm just saying she's not stupid.Copy !req
183. You shut up.Copy !req
184. She broke my heart, so I broke her jawCopy !req
185. - So when did you graduate?
- I'm class of 1980.Copy !req
186. Hey, he's class of 1980.Copy !req
187. Yeah? Graduated 1980 and still come
to all these football parties, huh?Copy !req
188. I never miss these.Copy !req
189. - Well, that's team spirit!
- Yeah, it is.Copy !req
190. - Ain't it? That is team spirit.
- Yes, sir.Copy !req
191. All right, you ready to be on America's
Hilarious Home Videos, or what?Copy !req
192. Absolutely.Copy !req
193. All right, put down that glass.Copy !req
194. All right,
now pick up that there flowerpot.Copy !req
195. All right, bring it up over your head.Copy !req
196. All right, now close your eyes.
Think real hard.Copy !req
197. - You getting this?
- You know I got it.Copy !req
198. Then say, "I'm stupid
and I'm about to get hit in the nuts."Copy !req
199. That's funny. Ain't it, buddy?Copy !req
200. That's what I mean, see. They need to
change the name of the showCopy !req
201. to America's Funniest Shots in the Nuts!Copy !req
202. Baby, I don't know
if I can concentrate here.Copy !req
203. Relax, let the dryer do the work.Copy !req
204. - Go, go, go, go, go, go, go!
- Go, go, go, go, go, go, go!Copy !req
205. All right, fancy boy.
You ready to show us your dinner?Copy !req
206. Nothing but net!Copy !req
207. - Billy Bob! Billy Bob!
- Billy Bob! Billy Bob!Copy !req
208. You thinking about calling
some dinosaurs?Copy !req
209. I figured I'd give them a holler.Copy !req
210. - Billy Bob's gonna puke.
- Here he goes!Copy !req
211. Move!Copy !req
212. Hey, if you're hungry,
I left a few hot dogs in here.Copy !req
213. I'm back! Puke and rally!Copy !req
214. Give me a beer!Copy !req
215. - Break!
- Break!Copy !req
216. Set! Go!Copy !req
217. There he is! There he is!
That a boy, that a boy, Lance!Copy !req
218. You see that?
That's the way to ride them.Copy !req
219. All right! First string offense, take water!Copy !req
220. - Give me a huddle! Give me a huddle!
- Dummieos! Dummieos!Copy !req
221. Follow your dummieo QB to the mud
for a scrimmage.Copy !req
222. - Think about it now.
- Moxon, pick it up!Copy !req
223. Your attitude's earning you
laps right now, boy.Copy !req
224. Keep smiling, shithead.Copy !req
225. He used to hammer my ass
the exact same way 27 years ago!Copy !req
226. Hell, it's good for him.Copy !req
227. Shit, them boys is having
the time of their lives!Copy !req
228. No doubt about it.Copy !req
229. - Oop-dee-oop left, on one. Ready?
- Break!Copy !req
230. Let's go, big Mox!Copy !req
231. Shift!Copy !req
232. What the hell kind of offense is that?Copy !req
233. Kilmer gonna eat his ass.
Watch this. See?Copy !req
234. In Jesus name, Moxon,
what are you doing?Copy !req
235. What kind of lu-lu formation
you pulling?Copy !req
236. - It's a secret.
- It's a secret?Copy !req
237. Your dummieos can't even run
a simple drawCopy !req
238. and you got secret formations?Copy !req
239. Shit for brains,
this isn't no fucking sand lot!Copy !req
240. - It's called a oop-dee-oop.
- It's an oop-dee-oop. Oop-dee-oop!Copy !req
241. Nevada State averaged over 40 points
a game with this offense.Copy !req
242. Overload the defense
on the strong side,Copy !req
243. burn them one on one on the other.Copy !req
244. You got a bad attitude,
and you don't listen!Copy !req
245. We do things around here my way!
You understand that?Copy !req
246. You think you're in some fancy school?
Bullshit!Copy !req
247. You show me the kind of smarts,
makes me wonder if you knowCopy !req
248. the difference between a sneeze
and a wet fart!Copy !req
249. You gonna be second string
all your life, boy!Copy !req
250. Man! Kilmer loves
to bag on your boy, Sammy.Copy !req
251. Been on him all season.Copy !req
252. Oop-dee-oop! Give me a break!
Oop-dee-fucking-oop! Give me a break.Copy !req
253. I stood up to it, so will he.Copy !req
254. Yup, gonna hold our Troy back a yearCopy !req
255. so he'll be bigger for frosh try-outs.Copy !req
256. Eighth grade isn't so bad, is it, Son?Copy !req
257. Our Kyle's dying
to get into a Coyote jersey.Copy !req
258. Had that ankle injury,
but he's ready to go now.Copy !req
259. Ain't that right, Son?Copy !req
260. Kyle?Copy !req
261. Kyle!Copy !req
262. He's very spiritual.Copy !req
263. Shame nobody had the mind
to hold us backCopy !req
264. when we was kids, eh, Sammy boy?Copy !req
265. Hell, I didn't fair so bad.Copy !req
266. Lance? Toss me one, Son.Copy !req
267. Let's show them
your old pop's still got it!Copy !req
268. Button hook right on three.
Hut! Hut! Hut!Copy !req
269. Slow enough he could have mailed it.Copy !req
270. Well, there you go, Sammy boy.Copy !req
271. - Oh, no.
- Let's see it, old man!Copy !req
272. Let's show them how it's done.Copy !req
273. But, Dad, come on,
you're gonna fall on the barbecue.Copy !req
274. Slant right on three.
Don't talk back to your father.Copy !req
275. Set. Hut! Hut! Hut! Come on, boy, hit it!Copy !req
276. Well, I guess bad hands
just runs in the family.Copy !req
277. What's that supposed to mean?Copy !req
278. It's just for grins,
don't get your panties in a bunch.Copy !req
279. If Kilmer weren't such a prick,
my boy would be starting quarterback.Copy !req
280. Is that a fact?
And you think he's first string?Copy !req
281. - That's right.
- I smell a challenge.Copy !req
282. How about you, Jonnie?
Do you think you're better than my boy?Copy !req
283. Well, hell. It ain't multiple choice.Copy !req
284. I think it's best
we settle this matter once and for all.Copy !req
285. You all remember William Tell?
Get up, Lance.Copy !req
286. Let's show them what it takes
to start for Kilmer's Coyotes.Copy !req
287. - Stop it, Dad. This isn't funny!
- Knock off this here can.Copy !req
288. - Show them what you're made of.
- Come on, Lance. Nail the can! Nail it!Copy !req
289. You up, Sammy boy.Copy !req
290. - Dad, come on, this is stupid!
- Throw it.Copy !req
291. Sporting some 'tude now!Copy !req
292. - Be a winner. Throw the damn ball!
- Come on, Jonnie, you can do it!Copy !req
293. Sit on the bench!
Show us what you do best!Copy !req
294. - He's chicken!
- Yeah, he is a chicken.Copy !req
295. - Throw that damn ball!
- Hey, you feel like chicken tonight?Copy !req
296. You can do it!Copy !req
297. I raised you to be a winner.
So damn it, boy, win!Copy !req
298. Fire that fucking pigskin!Copy !req
299. Nice shot!Copy !req
300. - Get some ice for him!
- Not ice, get him a beer.Copy !req
301. - Oh, my God.
- Oh, man.Copy !req
302. Ladies and gentlemen.
Ladies and gentlemen.Copy !req
303. We are adults,Copy !req
304. and I think it's necessary that we move
beyond the common nomenclatureCopy !req
305. commonly associated with
sexual reproduction.Copy !req
306. Now, I want everybody together
to go ahead and say,Copy !req
307. "Penis, penis, penis,
vagina, vagina, vagina."Copy !req
308. Come on, you all, say it.Copy !req
309. Penis, penis, penis,
vagina, vagina, vagina.Copy !req
310. Well, good! Great!Copy !req
311. Now, I think it's also very important
that we discuss and discardCopy !req
312. any slang terms
for different sex organs. Please.Copy !req
313. Because today,
we are going to begin our study ofCopy !req
314. the male erection.Copy !req
315. Hand down, Billy Bob.Copy !req
316. Okay. So what are a few of
the slang expressionsCopy !req
317. for the male erection
we want to identify and discard?Copy !req
318. Elliot?Copy !req
319. Boner?Copy !req
320. - Is boner one of them?
- Yes.Copy !req
321. Boner is good. Boner is very...Copy !req
322. What, Billy Bob?Copy !req
323. - Can I go to the bathroom?
- Please.Copy !req
324. Now, does anybody have
any others before we move on?Copy !req
325. Mr. Moxon, care to share with us?Copy !req
326. The male erection?Copy !req
327. Pitching a tent. Sporting wood.
Icicle's formed. The march is on.Copy !req
328. Thank you, Jonathan.Copy !req
329. Stiff, stiff y, Mr. Mortis,
rigor mortis has set in, flesh rocket.Copy !req
330. Jack's magic beanstalk,
tall Tommy, mushroom on a stick,Copy !req
331. Mr. Mushroom head,
purple-headed yogurt slinger,Copy !req
332. and Pedro.Copy !req
333. Pedro?Copy !req
334. - Billy Bob, are you okay?
- Yes, ma'am.Copy !req
335. Call the nurse!Copy !req
336. Go on now.Copy !req
337. - How you feeling, son?
- Can't seem to hold down any chow, sir.Copy !req
338. Must be nerves.Copy !req
339. Don't you worry. You're gonna play
every minute of that game.Copy !req
340. Nurse doesn't think I should play.Copy !req
341. She doesn't, does she?Copy !req
342. Because, well,
I got my head whacked last week.Copy !req
343. Well, she don't have no division title
to win, does she?Copy !req
344. I'm gonna ask you, son,Copy !req
345. are you ready to go?Copy !req
346. - Yes, sir.
- That's my soldier, William Robert.Copy !req
347. Now you rest here. Take advantage,
see you at 4:00 practice.Copy !req
348. Yes, sir.Copy !req
349. Hut!Copy !req
350. Fourth down, 1:49 to play, Greenville.Copy !req
351. Stubby, leading 21-17.Copy !req
352. If they hope to win the ball game,Copy !req
353. the Coyotes have got to stop
Greenville right here.Copy !req
354. - Break!
- Break!Copy !req
355. Hornets, come to the line of scrimmage.Copy !req
356. James Cowboy pulls the quarterback
gives the football to Terry and...Copy !req
357. He's stopped right in his tracks!Copy !req
358. Yes! Our ball. He got the bastards!Copy !req
359. That's ours to win now! Ours to win!Copy !req
360. Get out there and win this ball game.Copy !req
361. All right, 4-95. Let's go. Get out there.Copy !req
362. Come on, Lance!Copy !req
363. Let's go! Let's go!Copy !req
364. Billy Bob,
I need you for one more series, Hoss.Copy !req
365. Get in there! Get in there! Right deep.Copy !req
366. Are you sure you're all right to play?Copy !req
367. - If you're not all right, say something.
- Moxon.Copy !req
368. Get your ass back on that bench!Copy !req
369. Let's go, boys, let's go!
Ours to win now. Door's open, let's go!Copy !req
370. - Break!
- Break!Copy !req
371. Set! Blue 32!Copy !req
372. Blue 32!Copy !req
373. Go!Copy !req
374. Lord, don't do this to me.Copy !req
375. Stub, I'll tell you, I've hardly ever heard
this stadium this quiet.Copy !req
376. Lance Harbor, laying there on the field.Copy !req
377. And you see his future
going down the drain.Copy !req
378. Committed to Florida State.Copy !req
379. And now what must this do to
the Coyotes' football plans?Copy !req
380. Oh, God.Copy !req
381. Lance, please be okay. Lance.Copy !req
382. Oh, God. It's my knee, man.Copy !req
383. I'm sorry, man. Lance!Copy !req
384. You're looking now coming in Lasala,
and you got Moxon looking to come in.Copy !req
385. Yeah, and you've taken more snaps
than he's taken.Copy !req
386. We got a game here. Let's go.
We got a game.Copy !req
387. We got a game to win. Let's go.Copy !req
388. Watch me for the signals. Stay focused.Copy !req
389. And don't worry, son, I'm behind you.Copy !req
390. - Let's go. Let's go.
- Well, there goes the season.Copy !req
391. That Moxon isn't worth the Charmin
extra soft he wipes his butt with.Copy !req
392. He's hurt bad, Mox. It's all my fault, man.
It's all my fault.Copy !req
393. All right, I right, 494, Z-post, on one.Copy !req
394. I right, 494, Z-post, on one.Copy !req
395. - Ready? Break!
- Break!Copy !req
396. Here we go with Moxon as quarterback.Copy !req
397. Yeah, they say this guy scratches
hisself better than he throws the ball.Copy !req
398. Set! 2-80!Copy !req
399. 2-80! Go!Copy !req
400. Yeah! En garde!Copy !req
401. Jon Moxon with a 40-yard pass!
Where'd this kid come from?Copy !req
402. Hey! That's my boy!Copy !req
403. - Everybody on the ball! Get on the ball!
- He's got to stop the clock!Copy !req
404. - Drag it. Drag it out.
- Stop play! Stop play! Stop play!Copy !req
405. Give me the horny hex!Copy !req
406. The clock's still running!
The clock's still running!Copy !req
407. Go!Copy !req
408. Huddle up!Copy !req
409. I can't... Go again. I can't.Copy !req
410. - You got it!
- Fuck it.Copy !req
411. I don't know what play they're calling.
How's your arm?Copy !req
412. - It's fine. I'm cool.
- All right.Copy !req
413. - Last chance for the Coyotes.
- Set!Copy !req
414. Moxon the quarterback.Copy !req
415. This is not the formation!
That's not the formation!Copy !req
416. Go!Copy !req
417. Moxon hands off to Brown,
throwback pass, complete!Copy !req
418. - He's got a chance!
- Moxon has the football!Copy !req
419. - He's got a chance!
- What's the move? Heading for...Copy !req
420. - Touchdown! Good grief!
- Touchdown! Touchdown!Copy !req
421. Bud Kilmer pulls off another one!
Unbelievable!Copy !req
422. Holy shit!Copy !req
423. Mr. Harbor? Lance is out of surgery.Copy !req
424. You should be able to visit him
in just a little while.Copy !req
425. - How long's he out?
- Any chance for this season?Copy !req
426. Look, Lance tore
every ligament he's got.Copy !req
427. He's gonna need several surgeriesCopy !req
428. over the next few months
just to repair them all.Copy !req
429. How long?Copy !req
430. Minimum, year and a half, if ever.Copy !req
431. No, no.Copy !req
432. Lance's ride?Copy !req
433. His scholarship to Florida State?Copy !req
434. Jesus.Copy !req
435. Look, I'm amazed
he hasn't had problems before this.Copy !req
436. I removed a hell of a lot of scar tissue
from that boy's knee.Copy !req
437. He shouldn't even have been playing.Copy !req
438. Never said anything to me.Copy !req
439. Moxon, get on home. Get some shuteye.Copy !req
440. Harbors appreciate you being here,Copy !req
441. but there's nothing more
you can do tonight. Get on.Copy !req
442. You go on. I'll stay with them, okay?Copy !req
443. - All right. I'll call you.
- All right.Copy !req
444. Well, I guess
I should be going, too, then,Copy !req
445. this being a family thing and all.Copy !req
446. - Thanks again for the ride, Mox.
- No problem.Copy !req
447. - What the hell are you doing?
- Changing.Copy !req
448. Come on. I'm wearing underwear.
It covers up the same as a bathing suit.Copy !req
449. Does it really bother you?Copy !req
450. Whatever, I... You know, I can handle it.Copy !req
451. This has been the worst night of my life.Copy !req
452. You really aren't looking.Copy !req
453. You're sweet.Copy !req
454. Lance is gonna be all right.Copy !req
455. His career is probably over.Copy !req
456. No, you guys are gonna be all right.
You love each other.Copy !req
457. Things change, Mox.
I don't wanna think about it right now.Copy !req
458. - I'm sorry.
- It's okay.Copy !req
459. I mean, what about you and Jules?Copy !req
460. Is there a future?Copy !req
461. Yeah, you know, I mean, she's great.Copy !req
462. I got another year
until she's graduating but...Copy !req
463. I mean, I love spending time with her,
you know.Copy !req
464. Things change, Mox.Copy !req
465. You're the starting quarterback now.Copy !req
466. - Well, you're here.
- You're not coming in?Copy !req
467. No. Not tonight. It doesn't seem right
with Lance all fucked up.Copy !req
468. You don't always have to do
the right thing, Mox.Copy !req
469. We'll continue this any time you want.Copy !req
470. Shit.Copy !req
471. Hey, girls.Copy !req
472. - Hey, Tweeter. How you doing?
- Good. How are you?Copy !req
473. Well, well, well,
if it ain't Charlie Tweeter.Copy !req
474. Yes, it is.Copy !req
475. So how we doing tonight?Copy !req
476. - How we doing? Well, we are doing fine.
- Congratulations.Copy !req
477. - Well, congratulations to you, too.
- Congratulations for what?Copy !req
478. Well, for getting to wear such cute
"mount me" hats.Copy !req
479. - "Mount me"?
- Well, not right away,Copy !req
480. I mean, after a couple of drinks, maybe.
I don't know.Copy !req
481. - Hey. Hey. Hey.
- All right.Copy !req
482. We just wanna make sure
no one drinks and drives.Copy !req
483. I was just kidding. Just kidding.Copy !req
484. - You got a smart mouth.
- I know, I got a smart mouth,Copy !req
485. and I got to watch it, and you know
what I'm gonna do? I'm gonna go home.Copy !req
486. I'm gonna give you these drinks.
Take this, please.Copy !req
487. I don't want to drink and drive.Copy !req
488. There'll be no drinking and no driving.Copy !req
489. I think it's time for you to go home.Copy !req
490. I think you're right.
I'm going home, all right?Copy !req
491. - You go home.
- I'm going home.Copy !req
492. - Bye, Tweeter.
- You know what? You hurt my feelings,Copy !req
493. - and now I'm going home, all right?
- Where's Billy Bob?Copy !req
494. I'm gonna go home,
and you can kiss my ass.Copy !req
495. Haines, he's taking the car!Copy !req
496. I'm gonna go to jail.Copy !req
497. Son of a bitch!Copy !req
498. Great game tonight.Copy !req
499. Thanks. How much?Copy !req
500. Your money's no good here.Copy !req
501. Jonathan Moxon, you are under arrestCopy !req
502. for not being naked
with some sophomore chickCopy !req
503. who wants to bathe you with her tongue.Copy !req
504. Now take off your goddamn clothes
and get in the car.Copy !req
505. - Tweeter?
- Damn right, Tweeter.Copy !req
506. They're about as sharp as a box of
marbles, but we're all naked in there,Copy !req
507. and we got handcuffs
and cool shit to play with.Copy !req
508. Now take off your clothes
and get in the car.Copy !req
509. Mox, Tweeter threw my clothes
out the window.Copy !req
510. - Will you come keep me warm?
- Shit.Copy !req
511. I can't go with you. But, here,
I'll give you my jacket. Here you go.Copy !req
512. Thank you.Copy !req
513. - Sorry, Mox. I got to bail.
- All right.Copy !req
514. Ladies. Shut up
and hold onto your nipples.Copy !req
515. Hey, you weren't asleep, were you?Copy !req
516. No. I was lying in bed
naming my unborn children.Copy !req
517. How's Lance?Copy !req
518. He's out of the first surgery.Copy !req
519. They're gonna have to go back in there
again in a few weeks.Copy !req
520. Man. I'm going to see him tomorrow.Copy !req
521. - I heard you played a great game.
- It was strange.Copy !req
522. Strange to be a god now?Copy !req
523. I don't know. I mean...Copy !req
524. We did win, you know.Copy !req
525. I don't know, I've been...
I just been walking around for a while.Copy !req
526. What's wrong, Jonnie?Copy !req
527. Want me to get dressed
and come out there?Copy !req
528. No. I'm just gonna go home.Copy !req
529. It's been a really weird night.
I don't know. I'll see you tomorrow.Copy !req
530. Well, they stole a state trooper car,Copy !req
531. and then they exposed themselves
to the ladies' auxiliary.Copy !req
532. I tell you, these players nowadays,
they just running around lawless.Copy !req
533. There you go.Copy !req
534. They're all hopped up on beer
and painkillers is what it is.Copy !req
535. - Painkillers.
- They exposed theirselves?Copy !req
536. Yup. Yeah.
They pulled out their wangers,Copy !req
537. pressed them up against the glass
at the Alano ClubCopy !req
538. while the girls was rehearsing
the Christmas pageant.Copy !req
539. Now that ain't right.Copy !req
540. Wangers on the glass
at the Alano Club?Copy !req
541. Yes.Copy !req
542. No. No good.Copy !req
543. You know, we never stole no cars.Copy !req
544. I don't think I can just keep letting
these boys get away with this stuff...Copy !req
545. Earl? Earl?Copy !req
546. My boys too much trouble for you?Copy !req
547. No, Coach. They just kids.Copy !req
548. You know, Sam's boy
looked pretty good last Friday.Copy !req
549. - Yeah.
- Yeah.Copy !req
550. They all get theirselves
a sweet hand now and again.Copy !req
551. Moxon sure ain't got what Lance has.Copy !req
552. Set. Go.Copy !req
553. So, now I wanna know
where Jon Moxon came from.Copy !req
554. - Forty-yard scramble touchdown.
- What a great run.Copy !req
555. Way to go, Jonnie.Copy !req
556. - Go, Mox, Go!
- Go, Mox, Go!Copy !req
557. Yeah, Mox.Copy !req
558. - Hey, nice game, Jonathan.
- Well, thank you.Copy !req
559. - See you in class.
- All right.Copy !req
560. Yes, you will.
That's a nice car on a teacher's salary.Copy !req
561. Look, I'm going with my dad
to see Lance. You wanna come?Copy !req
562. This is Olin Buchanan of KPJT.Copy !req
563. Mox, how does it feel to be
out of Lance Harbor's shadowCopy !req
564. and showing everyone
that you've been underrated?Copy !req
565. Gee, I mean, Lance Harbor
left some pretty big shoes to fill.Copy !req
566. I don't know that I'll ever
get the job done like he did.Copy !req
567. And we all want to know about you
planning to play ball in the Ivy League.Copy !req
568. Ivy Leagues?Copy !req
569. Heck, I don't know. I don't know.Copy !req
570. I just wanna thank God
and my teammates for the win today.Copy !req
571. I mean, Jonathan Moxon's only one man,
you know.Copy !req
572. I'm just one man.Copy !req
573. - Thanks.
- All right, thank you.Copy !req
574. "Gee"? "Heck"? You even thanked God.Copy !req
575. - You know, you're a scary superstar.
- Come on, Jules.Copy !req
576. You referred to yourself as one man.
You're really enjoying this.Copy !req
577. Why not? It's a trip.Copy !req
578. God. Look, I'm gonna go see my dad.Copy !req
579. All right.Copy !req
580. All right, let's razzle dazzle them
dummy D's with a little package six.Copy !req
581. - The old hook and ladder.
- Man, that play don't work.Copy !req
582. - Someone always screws up.
- Well, have a little fun, then.Copy !req
583. All right. Hook and ladder left, on one.Copy !req
584. Hook and ladder left, on one.Copy !req
585. - Ready? Break!
- Break!Copy !req
586. This ain't the one where I trot down field
and look like I'm lost, is it?Copy !req
587. Guy, huddle them back up again.
Huddle up. Clayton, huddle them up.Copy !req
588. Give me a huddle!Copy !req
589. Billy Bob, this play is for you, all right?Copy !req
590. - Tweeter's gonna pitch you the ball.
- Oh, no.Copy !req
591. Oh, no what? Just catch the ball.
Look, a ball. I'm gonna catch it.Copy !req
592. You big dummy. That's all.Copy !req
593. But wait a minute,
but I'm no eligible receiver though.Copy !req
594. - See what I mean, Mox?
- Just catch the damn ball, all right?Copy !req
595. - Fine.
- Hook and ladder left, on one.Copy !req
596. - Ready? Break!
- Break!Copy !req
597. Go.Copy !req
598. When did the damn circus
come to town?Copy !req
599. I didn't see no trucks.Copy !req
600. Would've been six
if he'd held onto the ball.Copy !req
601. For which team?Copy !req
602. You listen hard. Stick to the basics.
Stick to the basics. Stick to the basics.Copy !req
603. We're a running team.
You only call what I tell you to call.Copy !req
604. You hear me in there?Copy !req
605. You are the damn
dumbest smart kid I know.Copy !req
606. Come in.Copy !req
607. No, don't sit. It won't take a minute.Copy !req
608. You're dragging ass out there, son,Copy !req
609. and it's fucking up my universe.
You understand?Copy !req
610. You're fat, you're slow,
all of a sudden you're lazy.Copy !req
611. And if it wasn't for you, I would still have
my starting quarterback.Copy !req
612. I'm wondering what happened to you.Copy !req
613. - My... Coach, my head...
- I don't want no excuses.Copy !req
614. I want you to fix it.Copy !req
615. Get out of here.Copy !req
616. Get the hell out.Copy !req
617. Hey, Mox, wait up.Copy !req
618. - So, what time?
- What time what?Copy !req
619. What time are you coming over tonight?Copy !req
620. - Tonight?
- It's half price night at the gun club.Copy !req
621. My folks never get home before 12:00.Copy !req
622. Visited Lance today at the...Copy !req
623. This is about you and me.Copy !req
624. I've known you my whole life.Copy !req
625. I'm not telling anyone
you're coming over.Copy !req
626. Any time after 7:00.Copy !req
627. Why be good? I'm always good.Copy !req
628. Where's my upside to being good?Copy !req
629. I'm 18 years old.
It's not like I'm married to her.Copy !req
630. She invited me over.
I'm just being polite. Right, Kyle?Copy !req
631. - Kyle?
- I only answer to one name.Copy !req
632. I'm the great and honorable
El Ali Akbar Shabazz Da.Copy !req
633. That's a bunch of names.Copy !req
634. But there is only one God.
All praise be to Allah.Copy !req
635. Yeah, but would Allah nail Darcy
if he had the chance?Copy !req
636. I think he would.Copy !req
637. Okay.Copy !req
638. - Gave up on you.
- Am I too late?Copy !req
639. No. Come in.Copy !req
640. I'm glad you came.Copy !req
641. I mean, it's kind of weird
to have you in my house, isn't it?Copy !req
642. Yeah.Copy !req
643. I feel like I'm doing something illegal.Copy !req
644. Well, not yet.Copy !req
645. Look at me. I'm a mess.
No one ever sees me like this.Copy !req
646. I think this is the best
I've ever seen you look.Copy !req
647. You're sweet, Mox,
but you know you are.Copy !req
648. Nice house.Copy !req
649. I was about to make
an ice cream sundae.Copy !req
650. You want one?Copy !req
651. Yeah, have one. I'll make it.Copy !req
652. All right.Copy !req
653. Do you want whipped cream?Copy !req
654. - Sure.
- Okay.Copy !req
655. Come here.Copy !req
656. Wait. Wait. Wait, wait. Wait. I can't.Copy !req
657. We can't. This is not...
I'm really sorry. All right?Copy !req
658. What? You're sorry?Copy !req
659. There's Lance and then there's Jules,Copy !req
660. and I don't know if I love Jules
but I might.Copy !req
661. What I do know is I don't love you.
But Lance, he might love you. I can't...Copy !req
662. I don't love Lance.
It was never about love.Copy !req
663. It's about me getting a better life.Copy !req
664. Lance and I were gonna leave.Copy !req
665. Now I know he's probably gonna stay
in West CanaanCopy !req
666. and be the manager at Wal-Mart
and coach JV football.Copy !req
667. Darcy.Copy !req
668. I just wanted to go with you.Copy !req
669. Look, you're gonna get out
of West Canaan on your own.Copy !req
670. All right? You're smart.Copy !req
671. Unbelievable.Copy !req
672. What?Copy !req
673. I usually fall for
the whipped cream bikini every time.Copy !req
674. - Wendell?
- Hey, what's up, Mox?Copy !req
675. - Meet at the Mini-Mart at 10:00 tonight.
- 10:00? For what, man?Copy !req
676. - I could tell you, but I'd have to kill you.
- All right.Copy !req
677. Hey, have you seen Billy Bob?
I can't find him.Copy !req
678. I'm afraid something's wrong.Copy !req
679. - Kilmer.
- Kilmer?Copy !req
680. Come on, Mox. He's been riding
the fuck out of Billy Bob, man,Copy !req
681. blaming him for Lance's knee and shit.Copy !req
682. Look, man, I'm over this shit. I'm over it.Copy !req
683. - I hear you, man.
- You don't hear me, man.Copy !req
684. Kilmer's a fucking-ass racist redneck.Copy !req
685. You know how many yards
I average a game?Copy !req
686. - About 100?
- 133.Copy !req
687. You know
how many touchdowns I have?Copy !req
688. Three. That's only because
I broke for over 20 yards each time.Copy !req
689. Every time we get inside the 10,
he gives the ball to Lance on a sweepCopy !req
690. or some fucking roll out
to a white receiver. It's bullshit.Copy !req
691. - I'm just Kilmer's black work horse.
- Kilmer.Copy !req
692. You think he'd pick up the phone
and call Texas Tech or A&M for me?Copy !req
693. Fuck no.
My mom's been doing my recruiting.Copy !req
694. She's got Grambling coming to see me.Copy !req
695. Damn, Mox, I thought you knew.Copy !req
696. Shit is fucked up.Copy !req
697. Fuck Kilmer, all right?
I'll get you in the end zone.Copy !req
698. We cool, Mox. Hey.Copy !req
699. You got shit to tend to.
See you at practice, man.Copy !req
700. - What's up, Darcy?
- Hey.Copy !req
701. Hey. How are you?Copy !req
702. Tell me not to feel weird around you.Copy !req
703. Look, Darcy, the last thing I need right
now is for anything to come between us.Copy !req
704. Okay? Look, we're friends.
We're just a little closer now.Copy !req
705. - Okay?
- Yeah, I guess we are.Copy !req
706. - Thanks, Mox.
- No problem.Copy !req
707. Wait, Jules. Wait a minute. Jules.Copy !req
708. Would you listen to me, all right?
Bitches are all just panty droppers.Copy !req
709. You understand? That's it.Copy !req
710. What?Copy !req
711. Listen, you give them a Percocet,
two Vicodin and a couple of beers,Copy !req
712. and the panties drop. Very nice.Copy !req
713. - It's nice.
- It's nice.Copy !req
714. Tweeter, do you think
you'll enjoy prison?Copy !req
715. I don't know. What?Copy !req
716. - Where are we going tonight?
- That's a surprise.Copy !req
717. Just make sure everyone's
at the Mini-Mart at 10:00, all right?Copy !req
718. - I'm bringing Lance.
- Nice.Copy !req
719. What the fuck is that?Copy !req
720. Oh, my God.
It's star quarterback, Jonnie Moxon.Copy !req
721. Somebody hold me up.Copy !req
722. Look, there's nothing going on
with Darcy Sears. All right?Copy !req
723. I've known her since kindergarten.
Nothing's ever happened.Copy !req
724. You mean you've never seen her
in her whipped-cream bikini?Copy !req
725. - No.
- Funny.Copy !req
726. That's how she got Lance.Copy !req
727. Come on, Jules,
are we together or what?Copy !req
728. I don't date football players.Copy !req
729. Come on, Jules,
I've always been a football player.Copy !req
730. Number 26.Copy !req
731. No, you were something different.
At least I thought you were.Copy !req
732. What a Kodak moment.
Star quarterback Jonnie MoxonCopy !req
733. having a gut-check minute
about who he really is.Copy !req
734. - You don't think all this is hard?
- Hard? On who?Copy !req
735. - Jules.
- Mox.Copy !req
736. We had a thing and it was great, okay.Copy !req
737. Things have changed a little bit,
and that's okay.Copy !req
738. - Maybe you should go.
- You can't make me leave.Copy !req
739. Oh, my God.
Everybody come meet Jonnie Moxon.Copy !req
740. The Mox,
the star quarterback of the Coyotes.Copy !req
741. He's at my window.Copy !req
742. Good game. Good game, man.Copy !req
743. - Bring it on.
- These are from Brett.Copy !req
744. And you boys are on the house all night.Copy !req
745. - All right.
- Oh, yeah.Copy !req
746. Gentlemen, I'm gonna go nuts.Copy !req
747. My gift to you. To Kilmer.Copy !req
748. - Fuck Kilmer.
- Fuck Kilmer.Copy !req
749. Hey, Tweeter. Take my shot, man.
You know I don't drink.Copy !req
750. - Come on, you're drinking tonight.
- We got Elwood tomorrow, man.Copy !req
751. - We can't be staying up all late.
- Relax.Copy !req
752. Just chill, Wendell,
and look over your left shoulder.Copy !req
753. What's up?Copy !req
754. God damn.Copy !req
755. Oh, yeah.Copy !req
756. Yeah.Copy !req
757. Come on.
Come on, keep your shirt on, Billy Bob.Copy !req
758. It's a strip club, man. I'm here to work.Copy !req
759. Shit.Copy !req
760. Work it, Billy Bob. Let's go, dog.Copy !req
761. Oh, no. Oh no, come on.Copy !req
762. Here you go, have a beer. Come on.Copy !req
763. Come on, man.Copy !req
764. Go, Billy Bob.Copy !req
765. - What a nut.
- Hey, you know of all these guys,Copy !req
766. you're the only one that came
and visited me in the hospital.Copy !req
767. You're a good friend.Copy !req
768. And also, and I have to say that,Copy !req
769. thank you very much
for dragging my ass out here.Copy !req
770. I appreciate everything
you've done for me.Copy !req
771. You're not gonna try and hug me now,
are you?Copy !req
772. Yeah, baby, take it off!Copy !req
773. - Oh, my God. It's Miss Davis.
- Holy shit. It is Miss Davis.Copy !req
774. - It's Miss Davis. Miss Davis. Yeah.
- No way.Copy !req
775. I just want you to know that I am 18,Copy !req
776. and I have had sex
with older women before.Copy !req
777. It was topical. It was erotic.Copy !req
778. I gave it a 9.5. I still got wood. Still.Copy !req
779. I gave it a 10.Copy !req
780. - A 10. A fucking 10.
- Gentlemen.Copy !req
781. I'd like to propose a toast.
To Miss Davis.Copy !req
782. - Miss Davis.
- Ten.Copy !req
783. Fuck me. It's 7:00.Copy !req
784. What'd you just say?Copy !req
785. It's 7:00.Copy !req
786. - God, what's that smell?
- That's us.Copy !req
787. - Who we playing tonight?
- Shit.Copy !req
788. 10. 3-15. 3-15. Go.Copy !req
789. Well, Jon Moxon finding out
how the other half lives here,Copy !req
790. Stubby, as he gets crushed on that play.Copy !req
791. I tell you, that was a true slobberknocker
on that. He took a whooping,Copy !req
792. and Bud Kilmer can't be happy,
the way his team's playing tonight.Copy !req
793. Why don't you let
the pom-pom girls play for you?Copy !req
794. Goddamn worst game I ever seen.Copy !req
795. I thought you said Elwood
wasn't that good.Copy !req
796. They ain't. They're playing like shit.Copy !req
797. Anybody wanna stop these guys
from planting my ass?Copy !req
798. I got the squirts, Mox.
I think that liquor's still in my system.Copy !req
799. And I cannot concentrate
because I keep seeingCopy !req
800. Miss Davis' fat ass in my face,
bouncing and...Copy !req
801. Look, I'm hung-over, too, all right?Copy !req
802. We got to suck it up.
We got to put one in the end zone.Copy !req
803. All right, 4-95. Curl, on one.Copy !req
804. All right, 4-95. Curl, on one. Eyes up.Copy !req
805. - Ready? Break!
- Break!Copy !req
806. The hard work of so many is sacrificedCopy !req
807. by the disrespect of the few.Copy !req
808. Moxon,Copy !req
809. you sacrificed the honorCopy !req
810. of this football team
and the town that supports it.Copy !req
811. Shit, you poisoned my team, son.Copy !req
812. Hope last night was fun.
Hope it was fun.Copy !req
813. Was it fun? Was it fun?Copy !req
814. You think
you don't have to listen to me?Copy !req
815. Your daddy was a no-talent pussy,
but at least he listened.Copy !req
816. Little Billy Bob crybaby.Copy !req
817. You cost me my perfect season.
How does it feel?Copy !req
818. Cry me a river, you fat fucking baby.
You disgust me.Copy !req
819. My star quarterback is dragging
his leg around, because of you.Copy !req
820. And on top of that,
I got to sit and watch you cry about it.Copy !req
821. Well, you know what?
Get the fuck out of here.Copy !req
822. I don't wanna see your fat face. Get out.
Get the fuck out of here.Copy !req
823. Get out of here.Copy !req
824. People are saying you organized
an all-night drinking party.Copy !req
825. It's why you boys dragged ass out there.Copy !req
826. - Save it, Dad.
- Save it? Save what?Copy !req
827. You got the opportunity of a lifetime,
you're treating it like...Copy !req
828. Playing football at West Canaan
is not the opportunity of a lifetime.Copy !req
829. Your attitude's wrong.
Your tone of voice is wrong.Copy !req
830. - This is your opportunity...
- For you.Copy !req
831. Playing football at West CanaanCopy !req
832. may have been
the opportunity of your lifetime,Copy !req
833. but I don't want your life.Copy !req
834. What the hell's Bacon doing here?Copy !req
835. Billy Bob dropped him off. Said
you'd know how to take care of him.Copy !req
836. - Mind if I take a seat beside you?
- Don't move.Copy !req
837. This is for most-improved player
at lineman camp.Copy !req
838. I was 11.Copy !req
839. - How'd you find me?
- What the hell are you doing?Copy !req
840. Championship trophy. Steelers.Copy !req
841. We were nine. Remember this shit?Copy !req
842. - Playing Pee-Wee?
- Yeah. It was fun.Copy !req
843. No, it wasn't.
I remember getting yelled at.Copy !req
844. "You're too fat, Billy Bob!
Too slow and dumb!"Copy !req
845. We were just little kids, Mox.
Just little kids.Copy !req
846. It's like nothing was never good enough.Copy !req
847. - It's almost over.
- No.Copy !req
848. - It's over, man. This is so over.
- Come on.Copy !req
849. - What?
- This is bullshit.Copy !req
850. What?Copy !req
851. You're gonna let fucking
football bullshit get you?Copy !req
852. Fucking Kilmer?
You're gonna let Kilmer win?Copy !req
853. What else am I supposed to do?Copy !req
854. - Why don't you fucking tell me?
- Quit! Fuck it!Copy !req
855. Who gives a flying fuckCopy !req
856. about Bud Kilmer's
23rd district championship?Copy !req
857. - I don't.
- I do!Copy !req
858. I do.Copy !req
859. Man, Coach loved me like a son.
Treated me like one, too.Copy !req
860. He told me to protect Lance and I didn't.
I fucked everything up, man.Copy !req
861. Kilmer fucked up and every single player
on that team knows it.Copy !req
862. That's where you're wrong, Mox.
You're wrong.Copy !req
863. Look. We got one more game left,
and we need you.Copy !req
864. I need you.Copy !req
865. Who the fuck's gonna protect my ass?Copy !req
866. Come on.Copy !req
867. Your bony ass?Copy !req
868. I don't think I have a bony ass.Copy !req
869. I think I have a very nice ass.Copy !req
870. It is kind of nice.Copy !req
871. Yeah! Yeah!Copy !req
872. Fuck you and the horse you rode in on,
you son of a bitch!Copy !req
873. Sam, we're a little worried
about the Gilroy game.Copy !req
874. Yup. You know, this is their first year
to play in our district.Copy !req
875. And they were Four-A all last year.Copy !req
876. Since they dropped down to Three-A,
they've been killing people.Copy !req
877. Hell, they've been hurting people.Copy !req
878. Believe me when I tell you,
Mox will stick to the game plan.Copy !req
879. - That's what we came to hear.
- Thank you, Sam.Copy !req
880. Hey, hey.
What's the deal with these kids?Copy !req
881. - These are my people.
- Your people?Copy !req
882. - My people.
- Kyle, did you start a cult?Copy !req
883. - Yup.
- That's so sweet.Copy !req
884. Out! Out! Out!
Come on freakos, get lost! Come on!Copy !req
885. Now that's it! No more religions!Copy !req
886. You're healthy,
you're gonna play football.Copy !req
887. You understand?Copy !req
888. Hey, Jonnie,
this here letter came for you yesterday.Copy !req
889. Brown.Copy !req
890. "Dear Jon, I hope you're as pleased
to receive this letterCopy !req
891. "as I am to send it to you.Copy !req
892. "You have been admitted
to the 235th classCopy !req
893. "to enter
the college of Brown University."Copy !req
894. Jon. Great, Jon...Copy !req
895. "Enclosed in this packet are details
about your university grant packageCopy !req
896. "which covers your full financial needs."Copy !req
897. Jon, Jonnie. I'm real proud about Brown,Copy !req
898. but I need to talk to you about Gilroy.Copy !req
899. - Gilroy?
- Yeah.Copy !req
900. Tell me who wins.Copy !req
901. - What are you so damn happy about?
- My cat's okay. I can play.Copy !req
902. I took your advice, they scanned my cat.
I can play!Copy !req
903. Scanned your cat?Copy !req
904. - You got a CAT scan?
- Yeah!Copy !req
905. The doctor said you have
a human brain and that it works?Copy !req
906. - Yeah. Can you believe it?
- That's great!Copy !req
907. Man.Copy !req
908. Good news.
Damn, it's good to hear that.Copy !req
909. Gentlemen. Now that none of us
are inebriated,Copy !req
910. I just wanted to remind you
of our little conversation.Copy !req
911. I really appreciate
y'all not saying anything.Copy !req
912. We already made a pact
not to say a word.Copy !req
913. - Really?
- Miss Davis?Copy !req
914. Would you go to prom with me?Copy !req
915. - One, two, three.
- Coyotes!Copy !req
916. Jog it in! Let's go. Jog it in.Copy !req
917. How you feeling, Jonnie?Copy !req
918. All right, I guess.Copy !req
919. You understand that by running the ball,
we control the clock.Copy !req
920. And we can grind them
and the tempo of the game way down.Copy !req
921. Are you hearing me?Copy !req
922. You disobey me, and I will bury you.
I know about your scholarship to Brown.Copy !req
923. I got your grades under review,
and don't you think for a minuteCopy !req
924. that I can't fuck with your transcripts
and get this whole deal blown for you.Copy !req
925. I get what I want,
and you get what you want.Copy !req
926. That's it.Copy !req
927. - Hi.
- What do you want?Copy !req
928. I'm really sorry.Copy !req
929. I really need to talk to you.Copy !req
930. - It's late.
- I got into Brown today.Copy !req
931. Full academic scholarship.Copy !req
932. Jonnie, that's great! I'm so proud of you.Copy !req
933. What? What's wrong?Copy !req
934. Kilmer's threatening
to fuck up my scholarshipCopy !req
935. if I don't play by his rules tomorrow.Copy !req
936. - Then quit.
- Can't.Copy !req
937. - Then play.
- You don't understand.Copy !req
938. - It's just a football game.
- No, it's not.Copy !req
939. If it was just football I'd play.Copy !req
940. I love football when it's pure, but this...Copy !req
941. This isn't pure.Copy !req
942. You're right. I don't understand.Copy !req
943. If I play for Kilmer tomorrow and we win,
he wins.Copy !req
944. Everyone in West Canaan
will go on believingCopy !req
945. - he's the best coach that ever lived.
- Yeah.Copy !req
946. What about the next team he coaches?Copy !req
947. And the one after that?Copy !req
948. What if my little brother ends up
playing for him?Copy !req
949. I would be buying into
everything that's wrong with this town.Copy !req
950. You want some cheese with that whine?Copy !req
951. - What?
- You're a whiner.Copy !req
952. Why don't you just step up
and play the hero?Copy !req
953. - A hero?
- Come on, Mox.Copy !req
954. You're a football guy.Copy !req
955. You're gonna tell me
you don't know about heroes?Copy !req
956. Yeah, but heroes win.Copy !req
957. What if I lose?Copy !req
958. Our Father, who art in heaven,Copy !req
959. hallowed be thy name,
thy kingdom come,Copy !req
960. thy will be done,
on Earth as it is in heaven.Copy !req
961. Give us this day our daily bread
and forgive us our trespassesCopy !req
962. as we forgive those
who trespass against us.Copy !req
963. And lead us not into temptation,
but deliver us from evil.Copy !req
964. For thine is the kingdom,
the power and the glory,Copy !req
965. for ever and ever. Amen.Copy !req
966. Listen up, people.Copy !req
967. Everything you've all done to this point
means nothing.Copy !req
968. All of them two a days in the heat
mean nothing,Copy !req
969. all them games we won mean nothing
if you don't win tonight.Copy !req
970. No district title, no shot at state.Copy !req
971. This game is 48 minutes,
for the next 48 years of your life!Copy !req
972. Okay, break it down!Copy !req
973. Let's go. Coyotes, on three!Copy !req
974. - One, two, three.
- Coyotes!Copy !req
975. West Canaan versus Gilroy
for the whole megillah.Copy !req
976. This is the game.
This is what it's all about.Copy !req
977. Coyotes will receive the ball.
You gentlemen shake hands.Copy !req
978. Let's have a good,
hard-hitting, clean football game.Copy !req
979. Coyotes have won the toss.
Pass out the ammunition,Copy !req
980. let's go to war!Copy !req
981. I right, shift 52. We are a running team.Copy !req
982. Remember what I said.
Now, go fetch me a championship!Copy !req
983. - Go on!
- Let's go, Moxon!Copy !req
984. Get down their throats now!Copy !req
985. Blue 19! Blue 19! Go!Copy !req
986. What a great drive.
Basically going to Brown the whole way.Copy !req
987. You can stamp "US. Mail" on his butt.Copy !req
988. First and go from the eight.Copy !req
989. You got to give it to Brown
and let him take it in.Copy !req
990. Slot left, 35 dive.Copy !req
991. Move your ass in, let's go!Copy !req
992. Here we go. Slot left, 35 dive.Copy !req
993. Fucking Kilmer! Shit's fucked up.Copy !req
994. We'll change that to 25 dot.Copy !req
995. - Don't be stupid.
- What? No way, man.Copy !req
996. Does somebody have a problem with
Wendell putting one in the end zone?Copy !req
997. - No, sir.
- I didn't think so.Copy !req
998. Slot left, 25 dive, on one.
Slot left, 25 dive, on one. Ready?Copy !req
999. - Break!
- Break!Copy !req
1000. - Let's take it in.
- Go!Copy !req
1001. Yeah!Copy !req
1002. Yeah! Yeah! Yeah!Copy !req
1003. Yeah, baby! Yeah!Copy !req
1004. Yeah! Yeah!Copy !req
1005. - Thanks, Mox. Thanks, baby.
- Yeah! Let's go.Copy !req
1006. Yeah, keep it up, asshole.Copy !req
1007. Coyotes leading 7 to 0.
Gilroy with the football just at mid-field.Copy !req
1008. Byron "Booger" Bosell gets the pitch.
He's at mid-field.Copy !req
1009. - He's gonna go.
- 40, 35, he's at the 30, 20,15,10.Copy !req
1010. Touchdown! Good grief!Copy !req
1011. Ten!Copy !req
1012. Green 15! Green 15! Go!Copy !req
1013. What a hit on Brown.Copy !req
1014. I tell you, that was about as ferocious
a hit as I've seen all year.Copy !req
1015. He's in pain. And the bad thing about it,Copy !req
1016. - if he can't come back in and play...
- What about the Coyotes?Copy !req
1017. Get me off the field! Get me off the field!Copy !req
1018. Lean on him. Lean on him.Copy !req
1019. He tore something.Copy !req
1020. - Can you fix him?
- If he'll let us.Copy !req
1021. - Make him understand.
- Yes, sir.Copy !req
1022. - How you feeling, boy?
- Feeling all right, Coach.Copy !req
1023. Took a pretty good shot there.Copy !req
1024. - Let the old trainer take a look at it.
- Yes, sir.Copy !req
1025. Gilroy with the football,
Punkie Tyler, quarterback,Copy !req
1026. he wants to throw.
Throws long, and it is caught!Copy !req
1027. Touchdown! Gilroy!Copy !req
1028. Hoofed down there by Mad DogCopy !req
1029. in the end zone,
and look at him dance with the football.Copy !req
1030. Get some mustard.Copy !req
1031. There ain't no room for that hully-gully
stuff down there like that.Copy !req
1032. Kneel on it.Copy !req
1033. Coach, there's a minute and a half left!
Let me throw something.Copy !req
1034. I ain't interested in another turnover.
Get out there!Copy !req
1035. Move it!
Thinks I'm here for his entertainment.Copy !req
1036. Set. Go!Copy !req
1037. Well, the clock winding down,
and I can't say that I understand this.Copy !req
1038. - Moxon, kneeling on the football.
- That's gutless football.Copy !req
1039. And listen to this crowd.Copy !req
1040. Well, at the end of the first half,
Coyotes trailing 14 to 7.Copy !req
1041. You're a gamer, Wendell. Let's do this.
You'll be good to go.Copy !req
1042. - What are you doing?
- He's getting back in the game!Copy !req
1043. Close the door.Copy !req
1044. - Wendell, don't do this.
- Hey, Coach, I heard a pop.Copy !req
1045. - You know, I think he's hurt pretty bad.
- You get out of here!Copy !req
1046. You all wouldn't know anything
about dedication, team play.Copy !req
1047. But I would.Copy !req
1048. Don't do it, Wendell.
It's not worth it, man.Copy !req
1049. You gonna listen to that from a gimpCopy !req
1050. who's praying that we'll lose,
so he can be the missing link?Copy !req
1051. Maybe I shouldn't do it.Copy !req
1052. - Get the hell out of here!
- Don't do it.Copy !req
1053. Before I lose my temper! Get out!Copy !req
1054. - Don't do it, Wendell.
- Get out of here.Copy !req
1055. If that needle goes
anywhere near Wendell's leg,Copy !req
1056. I swear to God on my mother's graveCopy !req
1057. I will rip your arms off
and beat you to death with them!Copy !req
1058. You stay the hell out of this, Billy Bob.
This has nothing to do with you.Copy !req
1059. This has to do with all of us.
We kill ourselves for you.Copy !req
1060. Year round, we play hurt, we play sick,Copy !req
1061. and we spend most of that time
scared that we're gonna screw upCopy !req
1062. and you're gonna kick our ass, because
you don't really give a fuck about us!Copy !req
1063. All you care about
is your next district title.Copy !req
1064. - Give him the shot.
- You give him that shot,Copy !req
1065. you find yourself
another fucking quarterback.Copy !req
1066. You about ready
to lose that scholarship, boy?Copy !req
1067. If it keeps that needle out of his leg,
absolutely.Copy !req
1068. Good.Copy !req
1069. Fuck it, I'm out.Copy !req
1070. That's good! That's good! Finally!Copy !req
1071. - Tweeter, you take the snaps.
- No, I won't.Copy !req
1072. No, I'm out, Coach.Copy !req
1073. - What'd you say?
- I said, I'm out.Copy !req
1074. I'm with them.Copy !req
1075. The only way we're going back out
on that field is without you.Copy !req
1076. - I'm gonna pull the shit out of you!
- Get him off! Get him off!Copy !req
1077. All right, get your helmets on,
and take the field. Let's go, let's go!Copy !req
1078. Let's go now! Let's go, God damn it!Copy !req
1079. I'm walking out that door.
I want you all to trust meCopy !req
1080. and follow me out there.Copy !req
1081. Come on, let's go. Let's go.Copy !req
1082. Let's go after that time now.Copy !req
1083. Let's go! Let's go. Let's go.Copy !req
1084. Before this game started, Kilmer said,Copy !req
1085. "48 minutes
for the next 48 years of our lives."Copy !req
1086. I say, fuck that. All right?Copy !req
1087. I say, fuck that. Let's go out there,Copy !req
1088. and we'll play the next 24 minutes
for the next 24 minutes,Copy !req
1089. and we'll leave it all out on the field.Copy !req
1090. We've got the rest of our lives
to be mediocre,Copy !req
1091. but we have the opportunity to play
like gods for the next half of football.Copy !req
1092. But we can't be afraid to lose.
There's no room for fear in this game.Copy !req
1093. Now, we go out there and we half-ass it
because we're scared,Copy !req
1094. all we're left with is an excuse.
We're always gonna wonder.Copy !req
1095. But if we go out there
and we give it absolutely everything,Copy !req
1096. that's heroic.Copy !req
1097. Let's be heroes. Come on.Copy !req
1098. Who's ready? Give it up!Copy !req
1099. Come on.Copy !req
1100. What do you say, boys?
What do you say, boys?Copy !req
1101. All right! All right! Go!Copy !req
1102. Field goal for Gilroy. It is good.
Gilroy leads 17 to 7Copy !req
1103. with 8:10 left in the ball game,
and still no Bud Kilmer.Copy !req
1104. All right! Listen up! Listen up!
I need five wide receivers.Copy !req
1105. We're running an oop-dee-oop.
No tight ends, no running backs.Copy !req
1106. I want four receivers stacked left.
Tweeter, you on the right.Copy !req
1107. We're gonna overload their left side.Copy !req
1108. Force them to cover Tweeter
one on one!Copy !req
1109. - And no huddles.
- What?Copy !req
1110. I'll call the plays from the line.
Defense'll never know what hit them!Copy !req
1111. All right, let's go! Come on.
Break it down!Copy !req
1112. Let's go! Let's go!Copy !req
1113. - On three. One, two, three, Coyotes!
- Coyotes!Copy !req
1114. - Let's go!
- Go!Copy !req
1115. All right!Copy !req
1116. Pass completed that time to Tweeter
for 16, and they're going again.Copy !req
1117. Tweeter on the left!
Gonzales on the right!Copy !req
1118. I don't know what you call this offense,
but look at all those receivers.Copy !req
1119. Three, four, five?Copy !req
1120. Go!Copy !req
1121. Oh, yeah! Oh, yeah!Copy !req
1122. Gonzales, complete! One more timeCopy !req
1123. and they hurry up for the line of
scrimmage. Look at all the receivers!Copy !req
1124. Long pass this time, Moxon.
Touchdown!Copy !req
1125. While the Coyotes celebrate,
the question I've got to you,Copy !req
1126. where in the world is Bud Kilmer?
Did you hurt his feelings?Copy !req
1127. Well, after the touchdown,
I was looking down on the sidelines,Copy !req
1128. and he's nowhere to be found.Copy !req
1129. - Come on! Let's go!
- Defense! Defense!Copy !req
1130. - Defense, defense, defense!
- Defense, defense, defense!Copy !req
1131. Let's go, defense!Copy !req
1132. Go!Copy !req
1133. All right, now, let's go!Copy !req
1134. - They're punting it.
- Yup. And we're out of time-outs, too.Copy !req
1135. - If we don't block this, it's over.
- Coach Lance, put me in there.Copy !req
1136. - We'll block it.
- What, you wanna play defense?Copy !req
1137. Put me in there! We'll block it!Copy !req
1138. All right, get out there.Copy !req
1139. Thirty-eight seconds left to go in the
ball game. Gilroy with the lead 17 to 14.Copy !req
1140. Billy Bob has come into the ball game
for the Coyotes.Copy !req
1141. Oh, yeah!Copy !req
1142. Charlie Tweeter blocks the punt!
He blocks the punt! Charlie Tweeter!Copy !req
1143. I tell you what, Billy Bob, man child,
got his own zip code, opens a hole up,Copy !req
1144. Tweeter comes in, throws his hand up.
What a great job, big boy!Copy !req
1145. Coyotes still have a chance.Copy !req
1146. Twins right, Z out, on one.Copy !req
1147. Tweeter, make sure
you get the hell out of bounds.Copy !req
1148. Twins right, Z out, on one. Ready?Copy !req
1149. - Break!
- Break!Copy !req
1150. Get out! Get out! Damn it! Damn it!Copy !req
1151. Oh, jeez! Come on!Copy !req
1152. Pass was good to Tweeter
but he didn't get out of bounds!Copy !req
1153. - He didn't get out.
- The clock is still running!Copy !req
1154. The clock's still running!Copy !req
1155. Come on, let's go quick! On the ball!Copy !req
1156. Clock's on, get down!
Clock's on, get down!Copy !req
1157. Safe! Go!Copy !req
1158. Billy Bob? This is it!
The man who got us here.Copy !req
1159. - You ready?
- You don't think that lame-ass playCopy !req
1160. where I run downfield and act like
I'm lost is gonna work, do you?Copy !req
1161. Split left 90. Hook and ladder, on one.Copy !req
1162. Split left 90. Hook and ladder, on one.Copy !req
1163. - Ready? Break!
- Break!Copy !req
1164. - Touchdown! Touchdown!
- Touchdown! Touchdown!Copy !req
1165. Touchdown! Touchdown!
Touchdown! Touchdown!Copy !req
1166. Oh, my God! Billy Bob!Copy !req
1167. Good gosh all mighty Joe Friday!
Billy Bob!Copy !req
1168. Billy Bob! Billy Bob! Coyotes win!
Coyotes win! Coyotes win!Copy !req
1169. Twenty-three district championships!Copy !req
1170. Mox! Excuse me. Mox!Copy !req
1171. - Mox.
- Hey! Down! Down! Down!Copy !req
1172. Now wait a minute, wait a minute.
I thought you only kissed heroes.Copy !req
1173. And for some of us,
it ended without us knowing.Copy !req
1174. Maybe these were the last days.
I never played football again,Copy !req
1175. but I will never forget that day.Copy !req
1176. Billy Bob cried,
'cause he's a bit of a crier.Copy !req
1177. And Tweeter drank beers,
because, well, Tweeter drinks beer.Copy !req
1178. Lance is happy.Copy !req
1179. He found his calling as a football coach.Copy !req
1180. Wendell got his ride to Grambling.Copy !req
1181. That statue still stands, but only
because it was too heavy to move.Copy !req
1182. Kilmer never coached again.Copy !req
1183. I took my scholarship, and I will
graduate from Brown University.Copy !req
1184. The day was ours,
and no one could ever take it away.Copy !req