1. What would you do
to save someone you love?
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2. For Edward,
I would stop at nothing.
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3. What is he doing?
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4. Hey, party in the fountain!
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5. Edward!
Yoo-hoo!
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6. Edward! Edward!
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7. Edward!
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8. Edward? Where?
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9. Oh, my God! There he is!
Edward, we love you,
you're the best!
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10. No, Jacob's the best!
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11. He's exposing himself!
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12. No! No.
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13. Edward!
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14. Let me start
from the beginning.
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15. I used to live
with my mom in Nevada.
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16. But now she's always
on the road,
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17. because she started
doing some pro golfer.
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18. So, I came here
to the foggy town
of Sporks, Washington.
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19. 3,120.
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20. Holy shit!
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21. Make that 3,119.
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22. Anyway, I came here
to live with my dad, Frank.
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23. He's the town sheriff.
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24. I haven't seen you
in a while.
Your hair's longer.
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25. I grew it out.
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26. I guess it's hard
for me to accept
my little girl's growing up.
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27. I mean,
look at the size
of those tits.
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28. Dad!
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29. What?
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30. I feel so lonely
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31. Nobody gets me
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32. I am so unhappy
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33. Why can't I find
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34. a cool alternative boyfriend?
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35. There is something
strange about this town.
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36. I couldn't put
my finger on it.
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37. I used to live here
when I was younger.
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38. But I haven't been
back in a long time.
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39. I kept your room
just as you left it.
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40. Great.
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41. Remember your hamster,
Herman?
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42. Might have missed
a couple of feedings.
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43. You could play
with your dollies.
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44. I don't think so.
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45. What's that?
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46. Oh, that's
a special edition
feel-real dolly.
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47. I warm it up
in the tub first
so it's not creepy.
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48. It's been lonely
since your mom left.
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49. Oh, hey.
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50. You wanna come downstairs?
Some people are excited
to see you.
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51. Who wants their pacie?
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52. Good girl.
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53. Dad, I'm a teenager.
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54. Right.
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55. I guess I'd better get you
some new stuff then.
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56. Frank didn't get me.
I wasn't his little girl
anymore.
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57. Becca, you remember
Bobby White.
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58. Yeah.
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59. You're looking good.
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60. Good? I'm in a wheelchair.
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61. I can't feel anything
below my waist.
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62. You know what's
below my waist?
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63. My penis!
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64. Sorry.
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65. We're all glad you're here,
especially your dad.
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66. He wouldn't
shut up about you.
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67. Careful there, Bob,
I'm gonna roll you
down the hill.
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68. Oh, boy,
I'm real scared.
Bring it on.
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69. Boy, here we go!
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70. You're in trouble
there, mister!
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71. Hi. I'm Jacob.
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72. Hi.
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73. We used to make
mud pies together.
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74. Play doctor?
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75. Oh, right, right.
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76. I remember now.
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77. I gave you
a prostate exam.
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78. So, are we going to be
at the same school?
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79. I go to school
on the reservation.
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80. It must be fun to drink
and gamble all day.
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81. Too bad we're not
gonna be at school
together.
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82. It'd be nice to know
at least one person.
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83. Got you a welcome
home present.
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84. What do you think?
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85. I think that you're trying
to buy my affection with
that piece-of-shit truck
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86. to make up for the years
that you neglected me
as a father.
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87. Told you she'd like it.
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88. That's great.
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89. I fixed up
the engine myself.
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90. Thanks, Jacob.
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91. Go ahead, hop in.
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92. Okay. So you gotta pump
the gas to start her up.
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93. Damn fleas.
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94. Jacob, your foot.
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95. Ever since puberty,
I've been feeling
a little different.
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96. Excuse me.
I gotta take a leak.
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97. I guess my body is just
going through some changes.
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98. Cat!
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99. Come here, cat!
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100. Come here!
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101. Transferring
to a school that's
already in session.
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102. Being the new kid
is never easy.
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103. Nice clothes.
Still shopping in
the boys' section?
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104. Give her a break.
That's what I used to wear
when I was a virgin.
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105. Where'd you get that haircut,
"Fantastic Lesbians"?
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106. Hey, new kid!
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107. Hi, I'm Derric.
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108. I'm Becca.
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109. I'm the eyes and ears
of this place.
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110. I can hook you up
with anything you need.
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111. Cheat sheets,
human growth hormone,
harvested organs.
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112. No, thanks.
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113. Oh, I get it.
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114. You're one of
those antisocial,
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115. long-suffering
loner types.
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116. Actually, I'm more
of the humorless type.
Kind of a sourpuss, really.
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117. Full of insecurities,
with no great personality,
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118. yet every hot guy
finds me irresistible.
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119. You must be Becca.
I'm Rick.
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120. Damn, girl, you seem
really boring and frigid.
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121. You want to go to
the prom with me?
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122. See?
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123. I'm Jennifer,
future prom queen.
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124. I'm gonna pretend
to be your BFF,
but if you touch Rick's wang,
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125. I'll cut you.
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126. Who are they?
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127. Oh! Those are the Sullens.
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128. They're, like,
all adopted by Dr. Carlton,
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129. so they're not
biologically-related,
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130. but they're really,
really close.
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131. They moved here
a few years ago,
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132. and they're, like,
super-weird.
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133. It's a total mystery.
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134. Their skin is ice-cold,
they feed on human flesh,
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135. and they all
sleep in coffins.
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136. Maybe they're Canadian.
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137. Oh!
Oh!
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138. And who's that?
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139. Snooki, JWOWW, DJ Pauly D...
No.
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140. Not the douchebags
from the Jersey Shore.
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141. Him.
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142. The really pale dude
with big hair
and constipated look.
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143. Edward Sullen.
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144. He's a complete hottie.
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145. But, evidently,
no one here is worthy.
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146. He wouldn't even accept me
as his Facebook friend.
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147. "Favorite activity.
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148. "Searching for a soul
which has been cast
into eternal damnation"?
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149. But I don't care
about Edward.
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150. I've got another guy
on the side. Yeah.
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151. Sadly, he went off
to fight in Iraq
for a year.
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152. But we write to each
other all the time.
His name is John.
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153. "Dear John,
two weeks together.
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154. "That's all it took
to fall in love with you.
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155. "And in those two weeks,
you did things to me
no guy had ever done before.
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156. "I just hope I'm able
to poop again soon."
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157. Are you, like,
even listening?
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158. Oh! You guys are having,
like, an instant connection.
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159. How can you tell?
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160. Duh. Hardwicke 101?
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161. You're both staring
at each other
in slow motion,
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162. which although
cheesy and obvious,
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163. it underscores your
respective yearnings.
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164. Oh!
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165. Right.
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166. Ah! Becca.
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167. Why don't you take
the empty seat next to
that mysterious boy
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168. you're destined
to have a fatalistic
relationship with
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169. that will spawn four books
and a movie franchise?
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170. Do I smell?
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171. Yeah. Like tuna.
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172. Lunch.
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173. I'm Becca.
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174. I'm Edward.
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175. So you're new to Sporks.
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176. How do you like
the weather?
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177. I don't like cold,
wet things.
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178. So you must
hate Slurpees.
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179. I'm just trying
to figure you out.
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180. All right, class.
Turn to page 63
in your books.
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181. This is biology.
Why are we reading
The Vampire Diaries?
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182. In the '80s,
coke was all the rage.
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183. The '90s, grunge.
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184. Now it's the era
of vampires.
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185. It's just super-trendy.
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186. That's amazing.
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187. Oh!
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188. Hi.
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189. Why aren't you
wearing a shirt?
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190. I work part-time at
Abercrombie & Fitch.
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191. It's always the same
inane questions.
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192. "Who are you?"
"Why are you doing this?"
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193. "Does the carpet
match the drapes?"
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194. Yeah.
Oh, that's hot.
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195. I got a serious
case of the munchies.
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196. And I think you know
what I need to eat.
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197. Cheetos?
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198. Oh, hell, yeah.
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199. Thanks, dawg.
You a'ight with me.
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200. Whoo!
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201. Antoine?
What?
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202. The killing.
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203. Oh!
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204. Right. My fault.
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205. You know who we are,
don't you?
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206. Yes.
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207. You're the
Black Eyed Peas!
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208. Come on. Not again.
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209. Why does everyone
always think we're
the Black Eyed Peas?
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210. I mean, her, I get. I get it.
She looks just like Fergie.
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211. And he looks
like Will.I.am,
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212. but, Jesus Christ,
they don't even have
a white guy in their band!
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213. Ow!
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214. He hit me!
That's right!
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215. Mixed martial arts,
Tae Bo,
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216. and Yogalates
created this!
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217. Huh?
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218. How you like that,
pretty boy? Huh?
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219. Get him off me!
Get him off me!
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220. Now the elbow!
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221. Son of a bitch!
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222. I am not afraid of you!
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223. You should be.
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224. Damn that overwrought
unrequited teenage love.
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225. I couldn't stop
thinking about Edward Sullen.
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226. Amazing dexterity.
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227. He can't be human.
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228. Meanwhile, uptown, Blair
was getting cozy with Nate,
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229. who was secretly
crushing on Serena.
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230. Excuse me, but you're
interrupting my narration.
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231. Oh, shit!
Wrong show!
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232. X-O-X-O, Gossip Girl.
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233. Becca!
Jacob.
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234. I heard about
the accident.
Are you okay?
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235. Yeah, I'm fine.
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236. I got you these.
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237. Thanks, Jacob.
You're so sweet
and thoughtful.
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238. Any girl would be
lucky to have you.
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239. Just not me, of course.
You're like my little
gay brother.
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240. I heard you were
hanging out with
Edward Sullen.
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241. Stay away from him.
There's just something
really odd about that guy.
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242. Becca!
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243. I'd better go.
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244. Hey, sweetheart.
There you are.
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245. There was
a killing today.
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246. Fisherman Sculley,
by the docks.
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247. The blood was drained
from his body
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248. and he had
multiple bite wounds
all over his neck.
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249. You know what
that means?
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250. The Kardashians
are in town.
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251. Here.
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252. I want you
to have this.
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253. Mace?
You're my little girl,
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254. and there's a killer
on the loose.
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255. I'm not gonna leave
until I know you can
protect yourself.
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256. Now,
I'm going to come at you,
and I want you to mace me.
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257. Dad...
Honey, I've been
trained for this, okay?
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258. Here I come.
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259. Good God!
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260. God damn it!
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261. It's so painful! It burns!
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262. Sorry, Dad.
No! I'm proud of you.
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263. Are you okay?
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264. Mace will only temporarily
stop your attacker.
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265. You have to hit a man
where he breathes, Becca.
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266. You got
the franks and beans there.
Good for you.
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267. But I'm still
coming at you.
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268. Rip off the moustache,
sweetheart.
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269. But you love
your moustache.
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270. If anything happened to you,
I could not live with myself.
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271. Do it! Do it! Do it!
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272. You're good to go.
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273. Edward?
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274. Uh...
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275. Am I dreaming?
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276. Right.
You're dreaming.
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277. So you're not
really here?
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278. Exactly.
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279. Go back to sleep.
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280. Yeah.
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281. Got to...
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282. Got to TiVo
Wizards of Waverly Place.
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283. Patrón! Mario López!
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284. Becca, you're
sleepwalking.
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285. Hey, you're sleepwalking.
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286. Just you breathing
is the greatest gift
you could give me.
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287. I started to wonder,
maybe I wasn't
dreaming after all.
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288. I had to figure out
the riddle.
Who was Edward Sullen?
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289. Was he human,
or something
different entirely?
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290. Oh, snap!
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291. He dropped his business card!
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292. Good morning,
Sporks High students!
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293. Tickets are now
on sale for prom.
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294. And after school today,
don't forget to visit
the quad for the blood drive
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295. generously sponsored
by the Sullen family.
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296. Prom! Come to prom!
Prom's almost here! Prom!
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297. Here! Get your
flyer for prom.
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298. Check it out.
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299. We finally got a theme.
It's gonna be awesome.
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300. The theme is vampires?
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301. We just came up
with it randomly!
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302. Cool, huh?
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303. It's gonna be like
the festival of
St. Salvatore,
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304. like the one they have
in Italy every year
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305. that celebrates
the killing of vampires.
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306. And we're renting out
a huge stone courtyard.
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307. It's gonna feel just like
we're in the 15th century.
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308. It should be super fun.
Lots of red capes,
blood and binge drinking!
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309. You in?
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310. I don't know.
Prom's really not my thing.
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311. Well, it's my thing.
I mean, really, Becca,
what is with you?
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312. Prom is, like,
the pivotal moment
in any girl's life.
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313. I've only been
dreaming about being
crowned prom queen
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314. since I was a sperm
in my dad's balls.
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315. We need to talk.
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316. Your skin is pale white.
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317. You dress fashionably.
And you abstain from sex.
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318. I know what you are.
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319. Say it.
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320. Out loud. Say it.
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321. Jonas brother.
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322. That's right.
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323. Wait, what?
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324. No, I'm a vampire. Duh.
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325. That was my next guess.
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326. Then ask yourself
the most obvious question.
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327. What do we like to eat?
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328. Vampire cereal?
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329. You need to see what
I really look like.
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330. This is why we don't
show ourselves
in the sunlight.
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331. People would know
we're different.
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332. You're shining.
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333. No, that's just my bling.
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334. You don't get it.
I am a killer!
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335. Are you texting?
Yeah, Jennifer.
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336. I am the world's most
dangerous predator.
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337. I want to eat you!
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338. That's cool.
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339. Most guys
aren't into that.
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340. My family, we're not
like other vampires.
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341. We can control our thirst
to only hunt animals
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342. and the Real Housewives
of Atlanta.
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343. But I don't know
if I can control
myself around you.
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344. Look, Ed.
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345. I don't like to
play games, so
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346. I'm just gonna lay
my cards on the table.
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347. I really like you.
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348. I dig the Eurotrash
heroin-chic look.
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349. You're totally happening,
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350. and I wanna be with you.
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351. I can read
everybody's minds
but yours.
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352. You have to tell me
exactly what
you're thinking.
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353. You're pretty,
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354. so you don't
have to be smart.
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355. Would you like to go
to the prom with me?
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356. Yes.
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357. That's awesome.
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358. There were three things
I was absolutely
positive about.
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359. First, Edward was a vampire.
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360. Second, American Idol
is gonna blow without Simon.
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361. And third,
the next time
I saw Edward,
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362. I was gonna hump
the shit out of him and...
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363. Boo.
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364. Oh, gosh, you scared me.
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365. There is something
that I wanted to try.
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366. Me, too.
I love role-playing.
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367. That's not what I meant.
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368. Don't move.
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369. Kiss me already.
I know it'll be okay.
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370. That was amazing.
I've never gone
to first base before.
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371. Now let's go
all the way.
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372. Purity ring.
Yeah.
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373. Oh!
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374. I won't be able
to resist my urges
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375. to kill you!
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376. I don't mind.
What?
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377. Oh, God!
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378. Becca, no!
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379. Oh, yeah?
I like it rough.
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380. Stay away from me.
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381. No, please, please, please,
don't come any closer!
This is for your own safety.
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382. I'm trying to protect you.
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383. Becca?
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384. Becca?
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385. If this is going to work,
we're gonna have to take
things slow.
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386. I guess that's okay.
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387. Even though my teen
hormones are raging
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388. and I want to
have sex with you,
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389. I feel conflicted
about losing my virginity.
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390. I know you'll never
have sex with me,
because you're a vampire,
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391. so, really,
it's the ultimate
pubescent girl fantasy.
Copy !req
392. That was
incredibly insightful.
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393. I read it on
Stephenie Meyer's
Twitter page.
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394. Becca, I promise,
as long as you're with me,
you'll never get hurt.
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395. Starting now.
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396. Shit!
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397. Well, I think we all know
whatever killed Fisherman
Sculley was no animal.
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398. Look at those tracks.
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399. It could only mean
one thing.
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400. Canadians.
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401. Damn border-jumpers.
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402. They come here
and take all the shitty jobs
us lazy Americans don't want,
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403. and now they're killing
our fishermen, too.
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404. Yeah, Frank,
I think you're missing
the big picture.
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405. That is a big picture.
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406. It was
my 18th birthday,
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407. and the Sullens were
throwing me a party.
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408. Well, this is home.
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409. Hey.
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410. There is no reason
to be nervous.
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411. Well, I'm different
than you.
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412. They might not accept me.
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413. It's like the time
when my ex-boyfriend,
DeShawn,
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414. invited me to his
grandmama's house
to celebrate Kwanzaa.
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415. Dandelion, come where
the sunshine shines
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416. When you clock that second
And your heart starts ticking
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417. May it land on mine
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418. If we make it to space
I'll meet you
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419. Oh, my dandelion
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420. I want you
to meet my family.
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421. You must be Becca.
I'm Edward's mom, Eden.
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422. We've heard so much
about you.
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423. Finger food?
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424. That's Alex and Rosalyn.
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425. I just know we're going
to be great, great friends.
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426. And this is Iris.
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427. I hope we will be.
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428. No, she already knows
it will happen.
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429. Some of us have
special powers.
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430. Iris has visions
of the future.
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431. Oh!
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432. But I'm not on my period.
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433. You will be.
It's coming early
this month.
Copy !req
434. Relax, Becca.
Copy !req
435. We're just like any other
normal American family.
Copy !req
436. Except, of course,
we have no souls,
Copy !req
437. and we walk the earth
trying to satisfy
Copy !req
438. an unquenchable
thirst for blood.
Copy !req
439. I'm Jeremiah.
Copy !req
440. He's new
to the family.
Copy !req
441. He's still trying
to control his hunger
for humans.
Copy !req
442. Look, I don't want
to cause any problems.
Maybe I should go.
Copy !req
443. But you have to
open your presents.
Copy !req
444. Ow!
Copy !req
445. Paper cut.
Copy !req
446. You're bleeding.
Copy !req
447. Really bad, actually.
I must have hit an artery.
Copy !req
448. Becca, your nose!
Copy !req
449. I knew I shouldn't
have partied last night
with Lindsay Lohan.
Copy !req
450. Every time
I bring a girl home,
you guys try to eat her!
Copy !req
451. It's not fair!
Come on!
Copy !req
452. Someone here
order Chinese food?
Copy !req
453. Quick,
they'll be hungry again
in half an hour.
Copy !req
454. What happened back there
can never happen again.
Copy !req
455. I now know,
as long as I'm around you
you'll never be safe.
Copy !req
456. That's why I want you
to bite me, and turn me
into a vampire.
Copy !req
457. No.
Copy !req
458. I keep aging and
you stay the same.
Copy !req
459. I'm 18 now.
I'm practically a cougar.
Copy !req
460. I just...
Copy !req
461. I couldn't live with myself
if I turned you
into a vampire.
Copy !req
462. You're always
sexy and healthy,
and super good-looking,
Copy !req
463. with tons of free time
and money to travel the world.
Copy !req
464. It's a lot like being
George Clooney.
Copy !req
465. Strangely,
the only thing that does
keep aging is your ass.
Copy !req
466. It gets pretty
wrinkly over time.
Copy !req
467. You'll never
see me again.
Copy !req
468. Just promise me
that you won't do
anything reckless.
Copy !req
469. Okay. I promise
I won't date Chris Brown.
Copy !req
470. Farewell.
Copy !req
471. Edward?
Copy !req
472. Edward! Edward!
Copy !req
473. Edward!
Copy !req
474. You're just gonna leave me
here alone in woods
Copy !req
475. in an area
filled with vampires
who want to eat me?
Copy !req
476. Looks like Edward
left us a treat.
Copy !req
477. Great. This is exactly
what I was talking about.
Copy !req
478. Take that!
Copy !req
479. I came here to
help you, bitch!
Copy !req
480. Sorry.
Copy !req
481. There's nowhere
else to run.
Copy !req
482. Your beloved Edward
isn't here to save you.
Copy !req
483. Hmm?
Copy !req
484. Come on, Jack.
Where's the bro code, huh?
Copy !req
485. You know you don't try
to eat someone's girlfriend
Copy !req
486. right after they
break up with them.
Copy !req
487. Kardashians.
Copy !req
488. Jack, no!
Copy !req
489. Let's go!
Copy !req
490. Becca.
Copy !req
491. I'm going to have to suck
the venom out of you.
Copy !req
492. This is going to
be tough for me
Copy !req
493. because the taste
of your blood could
send me into a frenzy.
Copy !req
494. But on the other hand...
Copy !req
495. Just do it already!
Copy !req
496. Okay, Edward,
Copy !req
497. I think you got
all the venom out.
Copy !req
498. You can stop now.
Copy !req
499. And just like that,
Edward was gone.
Copy !req
500. I just couldn't get over him.
Why did he have to leave me?
Copy !req
501. And the rain is pouring down
Copy !req
502. And the tears are falling
But they never make...
Copy !req
503. Time passed,
Copy !req
504. but my yearning for Edward
never subsided.
Copy !req
505. Everyone reminded me of him.
Copy !req
506. I couldn't get
Edward out of my mind.
Copy !req
507. No matter where I looked.
Copy !req
508. No matter what I saw.
Copy !req
509. Without Edward,
my life was over.
I felt like dying.
Copy !req
510. And every night,
I had nightmares
Copy !req
511. that would make me scream
really, really loud.
Copy !req
512. Becca. Becca. Becca.
Becca! Becca! Becca!
Copy !req
513. You're so upset.
Copy !req
514. Let me check
your levels.
Copy !req
515. Oh. That's not good.
Copy !req
516. You've got more angst
than The Secret Life of
the American Teenager.
Copy !req
517. You know, honey,
I'm not real good at the
whole parenting thing.
Copy !req
518. But I do know that
breakups are hard.
Copy !req
519. Especially when
you're dumped by someone
Copy !req
520. as handsome
and hunky as Edward.
Copy !req
521. That boy can really
fill out a pair of pants.
Copy !req
522. I'm like,
"Mmm! Look at that!
Look at that!"
Copy !req
523. Yeah.
Copy !req
524. And let's face it, honey.
You're no looker.
And you twitch a lot.
Copy !req
525. It's kind of irritating.
Copy !req
526. That's for sure
the best piece of ass
you'll ever get.
Copy !req
527. My advice,
Copy !req
528. get yourself some of
those big, juicy
onion-butt implants.
Copy !req
529. Fix your hair up
pretty like Beyoncé
Copy !req
530. and,
who knows, honey, maybe
a black guy will do you.
Copy !req
531. That's my girl.
Copy !req
532. Oh!
Copy !req
533. Your friend Jennifer
keeps calling.
You should hang out with her.
Copy !req
534. Probably cheer you up.
Copy !req
535. I want you to say good night
to your new mommy.
Copy !req
536. Good night, Becca.
I love you. I love you.
Copy !req
537. She really does.
Copy !req
538. Well, we're gonna get busy.
Good night, sweetheart.
Copy !req
539. I don't get it.
Why would anyone want
to date a vampire? Lame.
Copy !req
540. Yeah. So lame.
Copy !req
541. That movie's
totally going to flop.
Copy !req
542. I can't believe
they get married
and have a vampire baby.
Copy !req
543. Thanks for
the spoiler alert,
dumbshit!
Copy !req
544. It's too bad Edward
dumped you
Copy !req
545. and now you don't have
a date for the prom.
Copy !req
546. 'Cause that dress
would have looked
great on you.
Copy !req
547. But you don't
need a dress,
Copy !req
548. because Edward
left you behind
in the woods like bear shit.
Copy !req
549. So I'm going
to wear it instead!
Copy !req
550. And check this out.
Everyone's going to be,
like, super jealous.
Copy !req
551. Couldn't you just die?
Copy !req
552. No.
Copy !req
553. But you can.
Copy !req
554. Well, this is me.
Where are you parked?
Copy !req
555. Uh...
Copy !req
556. Over there.
Copy !req
557. Ooh!
Copy !req
558. Right next to those mean
and scary biker dudes?
Copy !req
559. See you at school tomorrow!
Copy !req
560. Hey, baby! Come over here!
You can sit on my bike.
Copy !req
561. Becca. Those guys
are dangerous. Walk away.
Copy !req
562. Edward?
Copy !req
563. Ow!
Copy !req
564. Shit. Those guys
are dangerous.
Copy !req
565. Told you.
Copy !req
566. This is your brake.
And this is your throttle.
Copy !req
567. Jacob, there's...
Copy !req
568. There's something
different about you.
I don't know what it is.
Copy !req
569. I've been
meaning to tell you.
I'm a man now, Becca.
Copy !req
570. Are you telling me that...
That's right.
Copy !req
571. I've had my bar mitzvah.
Copy !req
572. Mazel tov!
Copy !req
573. So will you date me now?
Copy !req
574. Say again?
I couldn't hear you.
Copy !req
575. Right.
Copy !req
576. Will you go on a date
with... No, no.
What?
Copy !req
577. Maybe if you'd stop
revving the bike
Copy !req
578. whenever I'm about to ask
you something really
important, you'd hear me.
Copy !req
579. Right. Sorry.
Copy !req
580. Thank you.
Copy !req
581. Becca, I wanted to ask
if you would just...
Copy !req
582. Oh, come on!
Copy !req
583. Becca, will you go
on a date with me?
Copy !req
584. Sorry, but I don't like
to be yelled at, Jacob.
Copy !req
585. I think I'll just
take her for a spin.
Just one thing first.
Copy !req
586. Becca, you just
cut the brake line!
Copy !req
587. Becca, stop.
You're going
to hurt yourself.
Copy !req
588. Hey, Eddy
Well, I know
it might seem petty
Copy !req
589. But I can't stop
obsessing over you
Copy !req
590. Put down that guitar
and stop singing
like Taylor Swift.
Copy !req
591. If this is what
it takes to be with you,
Edward, so be it.
Copy !req
592. Becca! Don't drink that milk.
Copy !req
593. You know
you're lactose
intolerant.
Copy !req
594. This is for you, Edward.
Copy !req
595. Oh, God.
Copy !req
596. Sorry. But I did
try to warn you.
Copy !req
597. Becca!
Copy !req
598. Are you trying to get
yourself killed?
Copy !req
599. Uh-huh.
Copy !req
600. You're bleeding. Here.
Copy !req
601. Your body is so...
Copy !req
602. furry.
Copy !req
603. Are those teats?
Copy !req
604. Yeah, 10 of them, actually.
Copy !req
605. Oh!
Copy !req
606. I'd better go
get you some help.
Copy !req
607. That was fast.
Copy !req
608. You are so scrumptious.
Copy !req
609. No!
Copy !req
610. Be happy it was me
that found you
and not Rachel.
Copy !req
611. Why? What happened
to Rachel?
Copy !req
612. She was...
Copy !req
613. recast.
Copy !req
614. Shh!
Copy !req
615. She wants to torture you
for what you did to Jack.
Copy !req
616. At least I will
eat you fast.
Copy !req
617. Becca!
Jacob, run!
Copy !req
618. That's it?
A Chihuahua?
Copy !req
619. Yeah, I guess so.
This whole transformation
thing is new to me.
Copy !req
620. You can't stop me.
You're no werewolf.
Copy !req
621. That's why I always
travel in a pack.
Copy !req
622. It's raining men
Copy !req
623. Hallelujah
It's raining men
Copy !req
624. Amen
Copy !req
625. I'm gonna go out
I'm gonna let myself get
Copy !req
626. Absolutely soaking wet
Copy !req
627. It's raining men
Copy !req
628. Hallelujah
It's raining men
Copy !req
629. Amen
Copy !req
630. It's raining men, yeah
Copy !req
631. Please.
Copy !req
632. Get him, girls!
Copy !req
633. Hey.
Copy !req
634. Sign this?
Copy !req
635. Now, let's get you home.
Copy !req
636. You'll be all right now.
I know it's worked!
Copy !req
637. Why can't they
just be together?
Copy !req
638. There you are!
I've been looking
everywhere for you.
Copy !req
639. You look like shit.
Copy !req
640. What do you want?
Copy !req
641. Look, we're all sorry
we tried to drink Becca's
blood, even Jeremiah.
Copy !req
642. But something terrible
has happened to her.
Copy !req
643. Becca who?
I am totally over her.
Copy !req
644. I've moved on. I am done
with normal chicks.
Copy !req
645. I've finally found
someone as freaky as me.
Copy !req
646. My first wish
Turn the music up
as loud as it gets
Copy !req
647. My second wish
Me and the girls are
in the hottest outfits
Copy !req
648. My third wish
Copy !req
649. Too freaky?
Copy !req
650. Edward, I had a vision!
Becca was riding a motorcycle.
Copy !req
651. She tried to kill herself.
Copy !req
652. I fear Becca may be dead.
Copy !req
653. No.
Copy !req
654. I've got to find out.
Copy !req
655. How do you feel?
It's Edward, isn't it?
Copy !req
656. Here.
Copy !req
657. Why did you just
take off your shirt?
Copy !req
658. My contract says
I have to every
10 minutes of screen time.
Copy !req
659. Hmm.
Copy !req
660. Look, Edward left you.
Copy !req
661. But I would never do that.
I want to take it
out of the friend zone.
Copy !req
662. I really like you, Becca.
Copy !req
663. I like you, too.
Copy !req
664. When I'm with you,
I just feel
so safe and secure.
Copy !req
665. Thanks.
Copy !req
666. As opposed to how
I feel about Edward,
Copy !req
667. which is all passion,
lust, complete
forbidden fruit stuff.
Copy !req
668. I mean, with him,
it's all about my pussy.
Copy !req
669. Okay!
Copy !req
670. Do you mind getting that?
Copy !req
671. Sure.
Copy !req
672. Hello.
Copy !req
673. Officer Crane?
Copy !req
674. No, he's not
here right now.
Copy !req
675. Where is he?
It is very important
that I speak with him.
Copy !req
676. He's at the funeral.
Copy !req
677. Oh, God, no.
Yeah.
Copy !req
678. And supposedly,
the body was so mangled
Copy !req
679. that the undertaker
had to use Krazy Glue
Copy !req
680. to stick the head
back on and put marbles
where the eyes once were.
Copy !req
681. Hello? Hello?
Copy !req
682. It's true.
Copy !req
683. Becca's dead.
Copy !req
684. Edward, I'm so sorry.
Copy !req
685. I can't live without her.
Copy !req
686. Goodbye, Iris.
I'm going to kill myself.
Copy !req
687. I just had another
vision about Becca!
Copy !req
688. Becca's fine.
You don't have to
kill yourself anymore.
Copy !req
689. Edward!
Copy !req
690. Shit.
Copy !req
691. Prom rocks!
Copy !req
692. I love drinking!
Copy !req
693. Oh!
Copy !req
694. What's the matter, Becca?
Still no date for the prom?
Copy !req
695. Loser!
Copy !req
696. Here, have a drink, bitch!
Copy !req
697. She promised me
sex tonight!
High point of my life!
Copy !req
698. Becca! Get in the car, now!
Copy !req
699. What's wrong?
Edward thinks
you're dead.
Copy !req
700. Why would he think that?
Copy !req
701. Um...
Copy !req
702. Beats me.
Copy !req
703. He won't live without you
and he wants to die.
Copy !req
704. He's such a romantic.
Copy !req
705. Becca!
Jacob?
Copy !req
706. Becca, don't go.
You belong with me.
Copy !req
707. Oh!
Copy !req
708. I need to know,
who's it going to be?
Is it going to be me or him?
Copy !req
709. Jacob, I...
Copy !req
710. I'm not gonna take
no for an answer.
Copy !req
711. I'm not going to let go
until you tell me,
once and for all.
Copy !req
712. All right!
Jacob, I'll tell you.
Copy !req
713. I choose...
Copy !req
714. Cat!
Copy !req
715. Come back here, pussy!
Copy !req
716. Edward is going
to the Zolturi
to have them kill him.
Copy !req
717. I saw it. I had a vision.
Copy !req
718. What are you talking about?
Who are the Zolturi?
Copy !req
719. They are the evil
bloodsuckers who only
care about themselves
Copy !req
720. and their own narrow
vision of the world.
Copy !req
721. They're kind of
like Fox News.
Copy !req
722. Oh, my God.
Copy !req
723. Edward's going
to expose himself
in the sunlight,
Copy !req
724. and the Zolturi
are going to kill him.
Copy !req
725. They can't allow humans
to know vampires
live among them.
Copy !req
726. It could destroy us.
Copy !req
727. Okay, where is this
going to happen?
Copy !req
728. At the prom.
Copy !req
729. The Zolturi never miss
a good St. Salvatore Day
festival.
Copy !req
730. They flew all the way
in from Italy.
Copy !req
731. Say what you want
about them, but they
do know how to party.
Copy !req
732. Suck! Suck! Suck!
Suck! Suck! Suck!
Copy !req
733. Oh! I got skills, bitch.
Copy !req
734. Welcome,
Sporks High students,
to the 2010 prom.
Copy !req
735. And don't forget,
the main event is
coming up shortly.
Copy !req
736. The crowning of your
prom king and queen.
Copy !req
737. And if you haven't had
a chance to vote yet,
Copy !req
738. don't worry,
there's still time.
Copy !req
739. Just to be sure.
Copy !req
740. Becca, you're the only one
that can stop Edward.
Copy !req
741. You have to show him
you're still alive.
Copy !req
742. I'll do whatever it takes.
Copy !req
743. So, what would you do
to save someone you love?
Copy !req
744. For Edward,
I would stop at nothing.
Copy !req
745. Whoa.
Copy !req
746. You already saw
this part, so let's get
to what happens next.
Copy !req
747. No!
Copy !req
748. Edward!
Copy !req
749. Shit!
Copy !req
750. Uh-oh.
Copy !req
751. Edward!
Copy !req
752. Edward, it's not sunny
anymore. It's twilight.
Copy !req
753. Hey, new moon.
Copy !req
754. Ah! Eclipse?
Copy !req
755. Look at me, everyone!
Copy !req
756. This is me
in all my glory.
Copy !req
757. Lucky penny.
Copy !req
758. Oh!
Copy !req
759. Huh?
Copy !req
760. Edward!
Copy !req
761. Becca? You're alive?
Copy !req
762. We have to go now.
Copy !req
763. Becca, I am so sorry.
Copy !req
764. I promise you
that I will never
leave you again.
Copy !req
765. The Zolturi are standing
right behind me, aren't they?
Copy !req
766. Yep.
Don't worry, Becca.
Copy !req
767. Not talking
smack now, are we?
Copy !req
768. Stop it!
"Stop it!"
Copy !req
769. You're killing him!
"You're killing him!"
Copy !req
770. And we haven't
even had sex yet.
Copy !req
771. "And we haven't
even had sex..."
Copy !req
772. Really?
Copy !req
773. Even...
Copy !req
774. Oh!
Copy !req
775. Becca. Becca.
Copy !req
776. Oh! Dad.
Copy !req
777. There you are.
I was worried
about my little girl.
Copy !req
778. You know, there's still
a killer on the loose.
Copy !req
779. But I can see you're dancing
with your friends,
so everything's all right.
Copy !req
780. Dad, no...
Copy !req
781. No, Frank, wait.
Copy !req
782. You have to know
the truth.
Copy !req
783. All of the killing
was done by vampires.
Copy !req
784. Edward's one, also.
Copy !req
785. And Bobby White's
a werewolf.
Copy !req
786. Oh, oh...
Copy !req
787. Ow!
Sorry.
Copy !req
788. I understand.
Thank God.
Copy !req
789. The theme of the prom!
Copy !req
790. No, Dad.
Copy !req
791. Enjoy, okay?
Copy !req
792. Becca, by the way,
thanks for everything.
Copy !req
793. All through the night
Copy !req
794. Too close. Separate,
arms length apart.
Copy !req
795. Too close. Separate,
arms length apart.
Copy !req
796. Too close. Separate!
Arms length apart!
Copy !req
797. Hmm.
Copy !req
798. Say cheese.
Copy !req
799. Say cheese.
Copy !req
800. Whoo!
Copy !req
801. What...
Copy !req
802. the hell?
Copy !req
803. Oh!
Copy !req
804. Where's Becca?
Copy !req
805. Surrender now,
or Salvatore will snap
her neck like a Slim Jim.
Copy !req
806. You must pay for
exposing yourself.
Copy !req
807. Tell you what
I'm going to do,
Ed-to-the-ward.
Copy !req
808. I won't kill you.
But Becca has to
become a vampire.
Copy !req
809. Cool?
Copy !req
810. No, not cool.
No way! Never!
Copy !req
811. All right.
Pull Edward's head off,
Copy !req
812. then rip his body apart
and set him on fire.
Copy !req
813. No, no, no.
I mean, yes!
I meant yes!
Copy !req
814. Of course,
she would love to
become a vampire.
Copy !req
815. She practically brings it up
all the time. Right, hon?
Copy !req
816. Uh, I guess so.
Copy !req
817. Then bite her now!
Copy !req
818. Bite!
Copy !req
819. Listen up, people!
May I have your attention?
Copy !req
820. And now the moment
you've all been waiting for.
Copy !req
821. And this year's
Sporks High prom king
and prom queen is...
Copy !req
822. Jennifer and Rick!
Copy !req
823. Triumph for the Rick!
Copy !req
824. Congratulations.
Copy !req
825. Thank you!
Yeah!
Copy !req
826. Oh!
Copy !req
827. Hold on!
Copy !req
828. It seems you two received
over 69,000 votes
Copy !req
829. in a class of only 300.
Copy !req
830. I'm afraid
you're disqualified.
Copy !req
831. What?
Copy !req
832. Oh!
Copy !req
833. God! You asswipe!
Copy !req
834. My life is over!
Copy !req
835. As your principal,
I will nominate a new
prom king and queen.
Copy !req
836. And I will pick...
I will... Let me see.
Copy !req
837. I will choose...
Copy !req
838. I pick you two!
Copy !req
839. Us?
Yes!
Copy !req
840. Because you two exemplify
what's best about
this whole prom.
Copy !req
841. I mean, you really look
like a couple of mean,
Copy !req
842. evil bloodsucking vampires.
Copy !req
843. Oh, my God!
We won! We won!
Copy !req
844. Yes, yes, yes!
Copy !req
845. Move. Out of the way.
Copy !req
846. Oh!
Copy !req
847. Edward!
Copy !req
848. Bite. Bite.
Copy !req
849. Do it.
Copy !req
850. Bite me now.
Copy !req
851. I don't want to wait
a second longer.
Copy !req
852. I will only turn you
into a vampire
on one condition.
Copy !req
853. Marry me.
Copy !req
854. Yes.
Copy !req
855. Are you ready?
Copy !req
856. How do you feel?
Copy !req
857. Perfect.
Copy !req
858. It's how I always imagined.
Copy !req
859. I love you, Becca...
Copy !req
860. Team Jacob, bitch!
Copy !req
861. Fuck me.
Copy !req
862. If I was your vampire
Copy !req
863. Slim as the moon
Copy !req
864. Instead of killing time
Copy !req
865. We'll have each other
till the sun
Copy !req
866. If I was your vampire
Copy !req
867. Death waits for no one
Copy !req
868. Put my hands across your face
Copy !req
869. Because I think
our time has come
Copy !req
870. Digging your smile apart
with my spade tongue
Copy !req
871. And the hole
is where the heart is
Copy !req
872. We built this tomb together
I will fill it alone
Copy !req
873. Beyond the pale
Copy !req
874. Everything's black
No turning back
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875. If I was your vampire
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876. Slim as the moon
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877. Instead of killing time
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878. We'll have each other
till the sun
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879. If I was your vampire
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880. Death waits for no one
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881. Put my hands across your face
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882. Because I think
our time has come
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883. Beyond the pale
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884. Everything's black
No turning back, no
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885. Beyond the pale
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886. Everything's black
No turning back, no
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887. I feel so lonely
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888. Nobody gets me
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889. I am so unhappy
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890. Why can't I find a cool
alternative boyfriend
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891. who understands me?
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892. We can watch the classics
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893. Shop at Hot Topic
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894. We're sexting dirty pics
of me in my panties
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895. We can watch the classics
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896. Shop at Hot Topic
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897. Sexting dirty pics
of me in my panties
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898. My panties, my panties
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899. Sexting dirty pics
of me in my panties
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900. My panties, my panties
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901. We can watch the classics
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902. Shop at Hot Topic
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903. We're sexting dirty pics
of me in my panties
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904. We can watch the classics
Shop at Hot Topic
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905. Sexting dirty pics
of me in my panties
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906. My panties, my panties
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907. I'm the one
who's always thinking about
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908. All the ways
to get to the end of it
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909. You came around
And I think that I found
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910. A good reason
to try and sit with it
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911. You're taking me down
But I like the sound
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912. And I want to get
with you anyway
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913. Is this solid ground
Or am I getting drowned?
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914. I'm just as happy
taking it day by day
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915. And in the end
We all end up the same
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916. Love and desire
Will be you once again
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917. Life, listen and sing
We all end up the same
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918. And in the end
It all goes up in flames
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919. Scars on the skin
You're bringing me in
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920. And I'm closer, closer
Every minute
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921. We'll start to spin
And I'm in it to win
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922. And I'm taking
every last bit of it
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923. Looking at your face
Making my heart race
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924. And I can't seem
Can't seem to make it stop
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925. Sitting by your side
Want to go for a ride
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926. And I'm waiting
Waiting for you to drive
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927. And in the end
We all end up the same
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928. Love and desire
Will be almost plain
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929. Life, listen and sing
We all end up the same
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930. And in the end
It all goes up in flames
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931. ENGLISH - US - PSDH
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