1. Put me down. Stop it.
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2. Say, Daisy Lou,
would you like to hear a little tune?
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3. Cousin.
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4. Oh, Blackie,
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5. you're wonderful.
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6. Sweetheart, I'll talk to him.
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7. Son, your mother and me would like for you
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8. to cozy up to the Finkelstein boy.
He's a bright kid,
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9. and he's going to military school and...
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10. Remember, he was an Eagle Scout and...
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11. - Arnold...
- Will you shut up?
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12. We're not going to have a family brawl.
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13. and a retard.
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14. We put up with a hell of a lot.
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15. Can this wait?
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16. Build your goddamn muscles, huh?
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17. You know, you could build your muscles
picking strawberries.
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18. You know, bend and scoop,
like the Mexicans.
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19. Shit, maybe I could get you
a job with United Fruit.
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20. I got a buddy with United Fruit.
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21. Get you started. Start with strawberries,
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22. you might work your way up
to these goddamn bananas.
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23. When, boy?
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24. When are you going to
get your act together?
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25. Gross.
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26. Oh, good God almighty me.
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27. I think he's the Antichrist.
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28. Anthony, I want to talk to you.
Now, listen.
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29. Don't walk away from me
when I'm talking to you.
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30. You get a goddamn job before sundown,
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31. or we're shipping you off
to military school
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32. with that goddamn Finkelstein shit kid.
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33. Son of a bitch.
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34. Up in smoke
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35. That's where my money goes
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36. In my lungs
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37. Sometimes up my nose
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38. When troubled times
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39. Begin to bother me
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40. I take a toke
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41. And all my cares go up in smoke
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42. You girls need a ride?
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43. - No.
- No.
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44. - You sure?
- Yeah.
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45. I'm going that way.
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46. - No.
- Later for you, you little jailbaits.
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47. What's that? She's hitchhiking.
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48. Watch out. Coming over. Geronimo!
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49. Hey, double bubble.
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50. Come on, baby. I'll give you a ride.
Let's go.
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51. Yeah, bend over.
I'll drive you home, baby.
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52. - Hey, you ain't a chick.
- Yeah, I know.
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53. But listen, that's the only way
I can get anybody to stop, man.
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54. Hey, that's false advertising, that, man.
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55. Yeah, I know, but listen,
I slept in a ditch last night, man.
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56. I almost froze my balls off, man.
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57. I didn't even think you had any, man.
I wouldn't even have stopped.
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58. Oh, wow. Hey, I really like your car, man.
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59. - Oh, you do?
- Wow. Did you do this yourself?
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60. Yeah, I customized it myself, man.
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61. Wow. Looks fantastic, man.
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62. Yeah, I guess it does.
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63. Well, I'll give you a ride.
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64. - Come on, let's go.
- Okay, just a minute, man.
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65. I gotta get my stuff.
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66. Okay, well, hurry up,
'cause I got a lot of things to do.
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67. Shit. Shit.
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68. - Okay. Let's go.
- Hey, just a minute, man.
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69. I got a few more things
I gotta get, okay? I'll be right back.
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70. - Just a minute.
- Hurry up, man.
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71. What are you going to do, move in, man?
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72. Put her in first gear.
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73. Here we go. Hey, hey!
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74. Second gear. Hey!
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75. Third gear. Here we go!
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76. Hey, man, how far you going, man?
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77. Right here would be fine, man.
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78. You ain't scared of a little speed,
are you, man?
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79. Oh, you got some speed, man?
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80. Speed? No, I don't got no speed, man.
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81. Hey, you know what I do got, though, man?
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82. I got a joint, man.
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83. Oh, wow. All right.
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84. Come on, light it up.
Let's get Chinese eyes, man.
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85. Hey, what kind of joint is this, man?
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86. It's a heavy-duty joint, man.
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87. It looks like a toothpick, man.
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88. - No, it's not a toothpick, man.
- No, hey, it is a toothpick, man.
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89. No, man, it's just...
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90. It is a toothpick.
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91. I must've got it in the other pocket, man.
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92. Hold on, man.
I got the real shit right here, man.
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93. Oh, that's my dick. Yeah, there we go.
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94. Hey, there you go, man.
Light that sucker up, man.
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95. We'll go to the moon.
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96. Jeez, I hope your dick's
bigger than this, man.
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97. Hey, man, you want to
get out and walk, man?
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98. Hey, you want to get high, man?
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99. Does Howdy Doody got wooden balls, man?
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100. I got a joint here, man,
I've been saving for a special occasion.
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101. Go on, fire it up.
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102. Hey, I hope the drums don't mess up
your upholstery, man.
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103. No, I'm in a band, too, man.
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104. - Oh, are you?
- Yeah, I'm a lead singer, man.
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105. - Wow, that's hip, man.
- Yeah, we play everything
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106. from, like, Santana to El Chicano, man.
You know, like, everything.
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107. Hey, I'm just a love machine
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108. And I don't work for nobody but you
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109. I'm just a love machine
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110. And I don't work for nobody but you
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111. Woman, when my temperature rise
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112. And then I go for her thighs
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113. And then I see guacamole in my shoes
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114. Guacamole in my shoe
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115. Is that a joint, man?
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116. Looks like a Quarter Pounder, man.
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117. Led Zeppelin.
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118. Hey, be careful with that shit, man.
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119. What, is it heavy stuff, man?
Will it blow me away?
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120. Better put your seatbelt on, man.
I'll tell you that much.
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121. Shit, I been smoking
since I was born, man.
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122. I can smoke anything, man.
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123. Like I smoke that Michoacán, man,
Acapulco Gold, man.
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124. I even smoke that tied stick, you know?
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125. Tied stick?
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126. Yeah, you know. That stuff,
it's tied to a stick, you know.
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127. Oh, Thai stick.
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128. Yeah, that didn't even
do nothing to me, man.
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129. I could probably smoke this whole joint,
man, and still walk away, man.
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130. It wouldn't be no problem at all, man.
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131. Toke. Toke it up, man.
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132. Dude, that's...
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133. Kind of grabs you
by the boo-boo, don't it?
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134. - Hey, man.
- What?
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135. What?
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136. Hey, what's in this shit, man?
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137. Mostly Maui Wowie, man.
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138. - Yeah?
- But it's got some Labrador in it.
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139. - What's Labrador?
- It's dog shit.
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140. - What?
- Yeah, my dog ate my stash, man.
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141. Had it on the table,
and the little mother fucker ate it, man.
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142. Yeah?
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143. So I had to follow him around
with a little baggie
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144. for three days before I got it back.
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145. Really blew the dog's mind.
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146. You mean we're smoking dog shit, man?
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147. Gets you high, don't it?
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148. I think it's even better than before,
you know?
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149. Damn, I wonder
what Great Dane tastes like, man.
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150. Wow, man.
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151. That's some heavy shit, man.
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152. Yeah.
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153. Hey, man, am I driving okay?
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154. I think we're parked, man.
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155. Oh, shit.
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156. God damn, what was in that shit, man?
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157. I never had no dope like that
before in my life, man.
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158. That's the heaviest shit
I ever smoked, man.
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159. I mean, I smoked a lot
of shit before, man,
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160. but, God damn, man, that's heavy shit.
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161. You okay?
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162. I can't breathe.
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163. What's the matter?
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164. I can't breathe, man.
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165. Well, just... Well, here. Hey, man.
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166. Hey, hey, I got something
that will mellow you out, man.
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167. You're just freaking out. Here.
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168. - Here.
- I never smoked no shit like that before.
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169. - Take these, man. Take these.
- What?
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170. - This will mellow you out, man.
- What is this?
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171. - What is this, man?
- Just take them, man.
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172. Hey, don't take those, man.
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173. What?
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174. I almost gave you the wrong shit, man.
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175. Hey, man, I already took them, man.
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176. Hey, what do you mean?
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177. Wow, man.
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178. Hey, what was that shit, man?
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179. You just ate the most acid
I've ever seen anybody eat in my life.
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180. Hey, man, I never had no acid before, man.
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181. Jeez, I hope you're not busy
for about a month.
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182. Shit, I'm going to die, man.
That stuff's going to make me die, man.
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183. - Oh, man. No, that's good acid, man.
- Hey, man, I never had it before, man.
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184. - It won't hurt you, man.
- It's going to make me freak out, man.
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185. I seen those guys
that walk around my neighborhood
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186. - that had too many acid, man.
- Oh, dude...
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187. Their heads look like a pumpkin,
like that, man.
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188. No, you're okay. Mellow out. Relax, man.
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189. Hey, mellow out, man!
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190. Now just go, "Om."
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191. - What?
- Do it, man.
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192. - Om.
- Om.
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193. - Om.
- Om.
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194. - Om.
- Oh, shit.
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195. Mellow.
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196. Mellow.
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197. Mellow.
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198. Yeah.
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199. - You better now, man?
- Yeah.
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200. - You mellow?
- Yeah.
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201. Feel all right, huh?
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202. Yeah.
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203. - What are you doing, man?
- Sometimes that helps, man.
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204. Hey, listen, can we get off
this street, man?
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205. Listen, we're parked in a bad spot.
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206. - That's heavy, man.
- The cops just went by, man.
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207. Hey, they're right...
Hey, man, we're being pulled over, man.
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208. - Hey, that's heavy, man.
- Hey, it's the cops.
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209. They're coming, man.
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210. This is cool, man.
I never had it before, man.
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211. I didn't think
it was going to be like this, man.
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212. What's the problem, son?
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213. Roll down your window.
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214. Keep on knocking. But you can't come in.
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215. Don't, man. It's the cops, man.
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216. Wait, I gotta roll down the window, man.
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217. Here you go. Weigh the anchor.
How much does it weigh?
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218. I don't know. I forgot. You forgot?
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219. I saw that on a movie once.
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220. - Can I see your license, sir?
- What?
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221. Your license. Where's your license?
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222. License. It's on the bumper, man.
Back there, man.
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223. No. I mean your driver's license.
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224. Oh, yeah.
Yeah, I got my driver's license, man.
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225. I just thought of
something real funny, man.
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226. Hey, your mama.
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227. - Sir, what is your name?
- What?
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228. What's your name?
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229. Isn't it on there on the license, man?
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230. Yeah, that's it. Pedro De Pacas, man.
That's my name.
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231. - Just wait here a minute, huh?
- Okay.
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232. Hey, hurry back.
I miss you already, darling.
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233. Come on, man.
I gotta get rid of this dope, man.
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234. - Don't act a fool.
- Oh, okay.
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235. - We're gonna get busted.
- I'll be cool.
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236. I'm blind. Oh, shit, I'm blind!
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237. Hey, blind, man.
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238. I can see clearly now, the rain...
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239. Hey, how long does this shit last, man?
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240. - And what is your name, sir?
- You scared me, man.
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241. What? I told you my name, man.
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242. Sir, what's your name?
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243. Hey there. Hey, what's your name, man?
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244. The dude wants to know your name, man.
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245. His name is Ralph, man.
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246. I was sitting in the coffee shop
just minding my own affairs
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247. When all of a sudden this policeman
caught me unawares
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248. He said, "Is your name Pedro?"
I says, "Yeah, I guess so"
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249. He said, "Then come with me
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250. "'cause you're the man
we've been looking for"
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251. I said, "Hey, man, I've been framed
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252. "Hey, no, really, man, I was framed"
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253. I never do nothing wrong, man
But every time I get the blame
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254. I been framed
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255. They put me in the line-up
And let the bright lights shine
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256. There was ten poor dudes like me
Standing in that line
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257. I knew I was a victim
of somebody's evil plan
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258. When this scroungy-looking dude
came up and said
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259. "Yeah, that's him, man"
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260. "Hey, wait a minute, man
I've been framed, man
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261. "Oh, listen to me, judge
I was framed"
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262. I never do nothing wrong
Oh, but every time, I get the blame
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263. Hey, I've been framed
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264. Parole.
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265. Then the prosecuting attorney
started prosecuting on me
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266. You boys are in a lot of trouble.
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267. That dude gave me
the first, second, and third degree
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268. He said, "Where were you
on the night of July 29?"
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269. I said, "Man, I was home in bed"
He said, "Judge, that man's lying"
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270. Hey, excuse me, I need a drink of water.
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271. I said, "Wait a minute, man
I was framed, man
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272. "Hey, just listen to me, man, really
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273. "Gotta believe me
I've been framed, man"
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274. I never do nothing wrong
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275. Hey, thanks, Pedro.
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276. Oh, but every time I get the blame
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277. Oh, I was framed
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278. Fucking vodka, man.
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279. - Oh, shit.
- Oh, hey, I'm down here.
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280. Wow, I didn't see you, man.
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281. Hey, listen, you can sleep
in that bedroom right there, man.
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282. - Oh, okay.
- Yeah, it's cool there.
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283. - Check you in the morning.
- Hey, listen, where's the bathroom?
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284. Oh, it's right there. See that door there?
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285. - See you tomorrow, all right?
- Yeah, we got rehearsal.
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286. - Okay. Okay.
- Okay.
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287. Hey, listen, man, if you hear some noise
in the bedroom,
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288. you know, moaning and groaning,
don't pay any attention to it,
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289. it's just me and my old lady.
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290. Next tune you hear
will be Dueling Bedsprings.
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291. - Check you in the morning.
- See you tomorrow.
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292. Amigos, presenting you all's new uniforms.
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293. - All right. All right, show time.
- Come on. Looky here. Looky here.
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294. Looky here. Check it out.
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295. - All right, you want more shit...
- Hey, man, I can't wear this stuff, man.
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296. - Hey, you...
- This is terrible, man.
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297. Look, it don't even fit.
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298. No, baby,
you cleaner than Skeeter's peter.
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299. You just don't understand the new style.
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300. - Baby, the name plate...
- Oh, man. Look, it don't even...
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301. Hey, it's too short, man.
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302. Oh, well, we'll just make
a few minor adjustments, holmes.
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303. - Look here. Ain't nothing to...
- Hey, hold it, man.
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304. No, man, I can't wear this.
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305. Oh, Curtis, man.
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306. Look at these uniforms, Jack.
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307. - Didn't I put them in the pocket?
- These uniforms is out of sight, man.
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308. - Shut your mouth, baby.
- Out of sight, man.
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309. I hope mine is as bad as this,
you know?
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310. Hey, you know it.
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311. - You see them new cuts on them?
- Yeah, yeah, man.
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312. All they need is rhinestones
on them pointed shoes, man.
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313. - Yeah.
- They out of sight, all right.
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314. Hey, these uniforms are lame, man.
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315. - What you mean lame, sucker?
- Hey, Pedro, man.
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316. Where's the white dude
you say was playing the drums?
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317. That's him, man.
Oh, that's James, the bass player, man.
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318. - Yeah, what's happening?
- Hey, seriously, man,
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319. these look like waiter uniforms.
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320. - You don't like them, man?
- No.
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321. Oh, wow. I'll be in the kitchen.
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322. He don't like it, he wants some...
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323. Hey, wait a minute. He's right, man.
These are lame.
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324. This is the new cut. You all be bad.
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325. No, hey, man.
If we're going to wear uniforms, man,
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326. you know, let's everybody
wear something different.
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327. Yeah, that's it.
Yeah, we want something
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328. where everybody
wears something different, man,
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329. but the same, you know?
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330. - I gotta get out of this stuff.
- Yeah, okay. Hurry up, man.
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331. - Hey, hey.
- Yeah, those are lame, man.
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332. - Get us something else, man.
- Pedro.
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333. - Pedro, this is Curtis, baby.
- Yeah, I know Curtis, man.
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334. I mean, I'm on top of it. Rest easy.
Curtis is on the case.
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335. Come on, man.
Hurry up and get dressed.
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336. We gotta go score a lid.
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337. and we'd like to rock 'n' roll
and play some great music.
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338. I have a song here by a group
called the Search Boys.
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339. And the Search Boys are
going to go searching.
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340. Don't ask me what
they're going to go searching for,
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341. but they're gonna go searching.
So let's do it.
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342. I can't believe we can't find
no grass nowhere, man.
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343. That's 'cause too many people
are smoking it now.
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344. And it really makes it
tough on the rest of us.
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345. - Yeah.
- You know what I mean?
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346. - The prices have gone crazy, man.
- Yeah.
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347. I mean, some people are paying, like,
100 bucks a lid, man.
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348. Wow.
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349. - Who lives here, man?
- That's my cousin Strawberry, man.
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350. He's probably got some dope, man.
He's always got the best smoke.
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351. Oh, I hope so, man.
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352. Yeah, well, he's cool.
His only thing is, he's a little weird.
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353. You know, like,
he went over to Vietnam, man,
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354. and he came back all weirded out,
you know.
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355. Yeah, well, that Nam grass
will do it to you, man.
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356. - Yeah.
- That stuff will lay you out, man.
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357. He's really weird, man.
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358. - That's what lost the war.
- So, like, be careful.
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359. Whatever you do, don't say nothing
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360. about his birthmark there, man,
because he flips out.
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361. Hey, I ain't going to talk about
nobody's birthmark.
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362. Yeah, don't look at it, either.
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363. Come on.
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364. You sure it's a birthmark, man?
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365. 'Cause sometimes that Nam grass
will do weird things
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366. to your face, too, you know.
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367. Who is it?
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368. It's me, Pedro, man.
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369. Pedro's not here.
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370. No, I'm Pedro, man. Open up.
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371. - What's the matter, man?
- I don't know.
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372. Somebody's messing around
in there, man.
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373. Come on. It's open, man.
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374. - Hey, Strawberry.
- Strawberry's not here.
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375. Hey, it's a bird, man.
A bird is answering the door.
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376. What a trip.
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377. Hey, fella.
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378. Hey, Strawberry?
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379. Wanna get high? Wanna get high?
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380. Must've had a party here, man.
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381. Wanna get high?
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382. Wanna get high? Wanna get high?
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383. Hey, want something to eat, man?
They got some pizza.
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384. Strawberry?
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385. Strawberry?
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386. Hey, Strawberry?
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387. Oh, Strawberry.
Hey, what's happening, man?
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388. How you doing?
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389. Starbuck. Starbuck.
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390. - Pedro?
- Yeah, yeah, right. Pedro, man.
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391. This is my friend.
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392. Strawberry.
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393. Hey, how you doing, man?
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394. I'm doing, friend.
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395. Oh, yeah. Well, we were stopping by
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396. to see if we could score
some smoke, man.
Copy !req
397. You know, we've been all over
the neighborhood, you know,
Copy !req
398. and nobody's got none, you know?
Copy !req
399. So, like, we was wondering
Copy !req
400. maybe if we could score
some smoke from you.
Copy !req
401. - Smoke?
- Yeah.
Copy !req
402. Smoke. You want some smoke?
Copy !req
403. Yeah, I'll get you some smoke, man.
Copy !req
404. All right. Yeah, we could score
some smoke from him.
Copy !req
405. Yeah, I told you, man, we could.
Copy !req
406. What you looking at, man?
Copy !req
407. Oh, nothing. I wasn't looking.
I was just...
Copy !req
408. - I wasn't looking at his neck, man.
- Oh, shit.
Copy !req
409. Your friend better stay here,
Copy !req
410. 'cause we're going to go over
and see some people of mine,
Copy !req
411. and they don't like strange dudes.
Copy !req
412. They don't fuck around.
Copy !req
413. - Well, I'll stay here.
- Yeah.
Copy !req
414. Look at that, man.
The great outdoors, huh?
Copy !req
415. - Yeah, great outdoors.
- Yeah.
Copy !req
416. El roacho.
Copy !req
417. God, it sure looks real.
Copy !req
418. Who are you?
Copy !req
419. Hey, how you doing?
Copy !req
420. I spilled it. I made a mess.
I was just trying...
Copy !req
421. Where have you been all my life?
Copy !req
422. - We just come in...
- If you don't mind.
Copy !req
423. It's not really...
Copy !req
424. Jeez, I don't believe it.
Copy !req
425. Oh, is that great?
Copy !req
426. Wow, what a rush, huh?
What's that stuff like?
Copy !req
427. Good shit.
Copy !req
428. The freak with the top hat
and the tire is leaving
Copy !req
429. - with a basketball.
- Cover the freak.
Copy !req
430. He's covered.
Copy !req
431. - Have the rest of the men stand by.
- Stand by.
Copy !req
432. I think we're onto
something really big, Harry.
Copy !req
433. This could be the bust
we've been waiting for.
Copy !req
434. Right, Sarge.
Copy !req
435. Zipping up.
Copy !req
436. Claymores.
Copy !req
437. - What?
- Claymores.
Copy !req
438. Get me up past that last hutch there
and jettison me into the paddies.
Copy !req
439. What are you talking
about paddies, man?
Copy !req
440. Ain't no paddies.
They're just Chicanos, man.
Copy !req
441. What are you talking about?
Copy !req
442. Strike that line chatter, grunt.
Copy !req
443. If you'd deploy a little recon,
Copy !req
444. you'd see that
Charlie has us surrounded.
Copy !req
445. Charlie? Oh, man. It's a cop.
Copy !req
446. Strawberry, they're around
your pad, man.
Copy !req
447. They're gonna bust your pad.
Copy !req
448. Hey, Strawberry.
Copy !req
449. Oh, man, are you flipped out
on one of your Vietnam trips, man?
Copy !req
450. Hey, hold on to your thing, man.
God damn.
Copy !req
451. Look, you take the point.
I'll take the rear.
Copy !req
452. If you need air, call it in.
Copy !req
453. Where you going? Hey, Strawberry.
Copy !req
454. Oh, shit.
Copy !req
455. Strawberry.
Copy !req
456. Fuck.
Copy !req
457. Shit.
Copy !req
458. I better get that.
Copy !req
459. - Hurry up.
- Yeah.
Copy !req
460. - Hello?
- Hello?
Copy !req
461. Hello.
Copy !req
462. Hey, man, don't answer the phone
even if it's me calling.
Copy !req
463. Man, I think it's bugged.
Copy !req
464. Pedro?
Copy !req
465. Yeah, this is Pedro. I mean, no.
Copy !req
466. Hey, man, look, the house is being
raided, man. Get out of the house.
Copy !req
467. Hey, Sarge. Listen to this.
Copy !req
468. Did you get the weed?
Copy !req
469. Hey, man, opscays. You hear, man?
Get outsky, man.
Copy !req
470. Igpays. Igpays. Vamoose.
Copy !req
471. Sounds very Latin.
Copy !req
472. Could be the Mexican connection.
Better get this down.
Copy !req
473. Hey, did you get the dope, man?
Copy !req
474. Hurry back, man.
There's some joints around here.
Copy !req
475. Hey, there's coke and everything, man.
Copy !req
476. Pedro, the place is full of joints.
Come on back, man.
Copy !req
477. This could be it, Harry.
Copy !req
478. Pass the word along.
Copy !req
479. Tell the men it's time
to shoot the moon.
Copy !req
480. Shoot the moon!
Copy !req
481. No, you idiot. Not out there.
On the microphone. On the microphone.
Copy !req
482. Shoot the moon. Shoot the moon.
Copy !req
483. Hello? Can't hear you, man.
Just a minute.
Copy !req
484. Hello. Hey, Pedro? We get cut off?
Copy !req
485. We really did get cut off.
Copy !req
486. Hey. Hey. Hello?
Copy !req
487. Shit, man.
How am I going to get him out of there?
Copy !req
488. Hey. Hey.
Copy !req
489. All right, freeze! This is a bust.
Party's over, folks. You, out.
Copy !req
490. You, freak there with the red coat...
Not you.
Copy !req
491. Don't swallow the dope.
We know you're holding.
Copy !req
492. I knew this party was gonna be a drag.
Copy !req
493. Just how well do you know
that freak with the basketball?
Copy !req
494. - Which basketball?
- "Which basketball?"
Copy !req
495. Hey, Sergeant, get a load of these two.
Copy !req
496. What's her problem?
Copy !req
497. Can't you see she's sick?
Copy !req
498. - She's sick, all right.
- It's turning blue.
Copy !req
499. Yeah? That's high-grade stuff.
Copy !req
500. Could be Peruvian flake.
Copy !req
501. That's right. Keep laughing, miss.
Just keep on laughing,
Copy !req
502. but this is not a laughing matter.
This is serious. This is very serious.
Copy !req
503. - This stuff destroys your mind.
- Can't you see she's sick?
Copy !req
504. She's been through a lot
in a short period of time.
Copy !req
505. She's all fucked up.
Copy !req
506. You watch your language, miss.
Copy !req
507. Harry, remember to get a lab sample
of this stuff.
Copy !req
508. You have the right to remain silent.
Copy !req
509. - If you refuse that right...
- Anything you say.
Copy !req
510. anything you say
may be used against you...
Copy !req
511. - Have you got the book?
- No, sir.
Copy !req
512. used against you in a court of law.
Copy !req
513. - Read the book.
- Thank you.
Copy !req
514. - Jesus.
- All right.
Copy !req
515. "You have the right to remain silent.
If you give that right up,
Copy !req
516. "anything you say can be used
and will be used..."
Copy !req
517. What's going on here?
Hey, who are you?
Copy !req
518. Listen to me, you pervert. Sit down.
Copy !req
519. Who are you?
Copy !req
520. We're from the finance company, man.
Copy !req
521. We came to reprocess
the furniture, man.
Copy !req
522. That?
Copy !req
523. Yeah. Well, you know, we gave them
a lot of chances to pay up, man,
Copy !req
524. but they didn't pay up
and the boss says it's got to go, man.
Copy !req
525. I'm just doing my job, man.
Copy !req
526. No. Come on, it's my bowl.
Copy !req
527. All right. Everybody out.
Move everybody out.
Copy !req
528. - Murphy.
- That means you, buddy.
Copy !req
529. - What the hell are you doing, Murphy?
- All right, move it out.
Copy !req
530. All of you, come on. Get out. Let's go.
Get out of there.
Copy !req
531. Everybody.
Copy !req
532. - It's locked, man.
- What? Oh, yeah.
Copy !req
533. Let go. Let go, man.
Copy !req
534. Come on. Come on in.
Copy !req
535. - Hey, what's going on, man?
- It's a bust, man.
Copy !req
536. We got to figure out some way
to get you out of here, man. Shit.
Copy !req
537. All right, freeze.
This is a bust. Strawberry.
Copy !req
538. Single file. I wasn't looking at his neck.
Copy !req
539. I wasn't looking at...
Copy !req
540. No, man. The town's dry.
There ain't no dope nowhere, man.
Copy !req
541. I got to pee.
Copy !req
542. Hey, Pedro.
Copy !req
543. - Hey, Pedro, my man.
- Hey, what's happening, Curtis?
Copy !req
544. - What's going on?
- How you doing, man?
Copy !req
545. Oh, I don't know.
Hey, holmes, this your ride?
Copy !req
546. - Yeah.
- Wow.
Copy !req
547. Yeah, I got it off
my cousin Johnny, man.
Copy !req
548. This is your...
I mean, this bad low machine is yours?
Copy !req
549. Yeah.
Copy !req
550. Oh, Pedro, you got
a taste of soul to you, bro.
Copy !req
551. - And style, too.
- Yeah, I hear you.
Copy !req
552. Hey, now, you know what you need
to go with this bad ride?
Copy !req
553. - A chick?
- No, baby. Check these out.
Copy !req
554. - Knuckles?
- Genuine diamonds, baby.
Copy !req
555. Those ain't for-real diamonds, man.
Copy !req
556. What you... Hey, man.
Check this out. Step back.
Copy !req
557. Ain't for real? Check this.
Copy !req
558. Hey, man, what are you doing, man?
You scratched my window.
Copy !req
559. You know, it's cool. It's cool.
Copy !req
560. Hey, well, you know
what I do need, man?
Copy !req
561. We been looking all over
for some smoke, man.
Copy !req
562. Nobody has no grass, man.
You got some?
Copy !req
563. Hey, man, I got some weed
straight from Turkey, boy.
Copy !req
564. It's what set them Arabs off.
Copy !req
565. - Arabs from Turkey?
- Yeah, man. Yeah, it was from Turkey.
Copy !req
566. Hey, man, this stuff is so bad,
it'll put a hump in a camel's back.
Copy !req
567. - No shit?
- I wouldn't shit you, baby.
Copy !req
568. - I mean, this is some bad weed.
- You got it on you?
Copy !req
569. I got it on me, man.
You got to check it out.
Copy !req
570. - It'll boogie-woogie on your brain.
- All right.
Copy !req
571. Just 'cause we tight,
Copy !req
572. I'm going to let you have it
for a double dime.
Copy !req
573. Man, that shit ain't shit, man.
Copy !req
574. What?
Copy !req
575. We smoked this whole lid, man,
and I haven't even got a buzz yet, man.
Copy !req
576. You ain't high?
Copy !req
577. I ain't high. I'll tell you that, man.
I don't feel nothing, man.
Copy !req
578. Boys, my man Curtis sure came through
for us this time, didn't he, man?
Copy !req
579. I'm annihilated, you know?
Copy !req
580. - What?
- Get me a cookie.
Copy !req
581. Juan, don't beg me, man.
Go in the kitchen, you know.
Copy !req
582. You must get high on lawn clippings,
Jack, 'cause this ain't grass, man.
Copy !req
583. - I'm telling you that.
- Oh, you guys is tripping, man.
Copy !req
584. I told you, Curtis is our partner, man.
He came through for us, you know.
Copy !req
585. Hey, if he sold you that, man,
I wouldn't want...
Copy !req
586. - Hey. Hey, man, hide.
- What?
Copy !req
587. Hide, man. It's a bust.
Copy !req
588. Freeze, you chili-choking pepper belly.
Copy !req
589. - One guy in the front room.
- I'll check the rooms on the left.
Copy !req
590. All right, what do you got in here, lady?
Copy !req
591. - Hey, man. Get the seeds.
- Who is it, man?
Copy !req
592. - It's a bust, man. Get the seeds.
- Seeds?
Copy !req
593. Why, man?
They can't bust you for seeds.
Copy !req
594. Well, then just hide your face.
Copy !req
595. - We ain't done nothing. There's no...
- It's a bust, man.
Copy !req
596. We're clean.
There's no weed in the house.
Copy !req
597. Hey, what's going on?
Copy !req
598. - Oh, man. It's just the migra.
- Who?
Copy !req
599. - Oh, I forgot. Shit.
- The migra?
Copy !req
600. Yeah, they're looking for illegal aliens,
man. I forgot it's the wedding.
Copy !req
601. - The wedding?
- Yeah.
Copy !req
602. - So who are these guys?
- They're the immigration.
Copy !req
603. You know, the migra, man.
They're going to deport these dudes.
Copy !req
604. - Deport them?
- Yeah.
Copy !req
605. See, what's happening is my cousin
is getting married down in TJ, man,
Copy !req
606. so he calls the Immigration on himself.
Copy !req
607. - But why?
- So he can get a free ride, man.
Copy !req
608. See, they come down with a big old bus,
they take the whole wedding party down,
Copy !req
609. - plus they even get fed lunch, man.
- Wow.
Copy !req
610. So we're cool?
Copy !req
611. Yeah. We got nothing to worry about,
man, unless you don't got a green card.
Copy !req
612. Hello, Uncle Chuey? This is Pedro.
Copy !req
613. Hey, man, we got deported.
We're down here in Tijuana right now.
Copy !req
614. We need a way to get back.
Copy !req
615. You got anything needs
to be picked up here?
Copy !req
616. Oh, yeah?
Copy !req
617. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Hold on.
Copy !req
618. Yeah?
Copy !req
619. Okay. What's the address? 1811...
Copy !req
620. Pedro.
Copy !req
621. Hey. Hey, man. We got a ride.
Copy !req
622. Wow, far out, man.
Copy !req
623. Hey, my Uncle Chuey's got a van
Copy !req
624. we gotta smuggle back
across the border, man.
Copy !req
625. - Hey, what are we smuggling?
- Upholstery, man.
Copy !req
626. He's got an upholstery shop
in Beverly Hills,
Copy !req
627. but he gets all the work done here, man,
'cause it's cheaper.
Copy !req
628. The smuggling of marijuana
from Mexico into the United States
Copy !req
629. has reached a dangerous high.
Copy !req
630. The methods have become
unbelievably devious,
Copy !req
631. and these are the seeds which may sow
the destruction of the human race.
Copy !req
632. Gentlemen, I don't think
we need to comment
Copy !req
633. on the seriousness of the situation.
Copy !req
634. Harry, will you cool that?
Just stop that, Harry.
Copy !req
635. Gentlemen, we are on the threshold
Copy !req
636. of copping one of the largest shipments
of marijuana
Copy !req
637. that has ever crossed
the Mexican border
Copy !req
638. into the United States.
Copy !req
639. The question is, how are they going
to transport it across the border?
Copy !req
640. - By boat.
- Carrier pigeon.
Copy !req
641. - Plane.
- Freight.
Copy !req
642. Piggyback.
Copy !req
643. - Plaster casts.
- Long trucks.
Copy !req
644. Long trucks.
Copy !req
645. Let me show you.
Copy !req
646. Inside TV sets.
Copy !req
647. No, Harry. No, no, no.
Not inside TV sets.
Copy !req
648. The TV set itself is the marijuana.
Copy !req
649. The tube, the picture,
the aerial, the whole works.
Copy !req
650. How can you make a TV set
out of marijuana?
Copy !req
651. That's a good question, Harry.
I'll show you.
Copy !req
652. Now, the weed is separated from seed.
Copy !req
653. The weed is then
transformed into liquid.
Copy !req
654. The liquid is then
acted upon by a chemical
Copy !req
655. which makes it hard like a plastic.
Copy !req
656. The plastic is then
transformed into a spray.
Copy !req
657. This spray, gentlemen,
is called fiberweed,
Copy !req
658. and it's pure marijuana.
Copy !req
659. Thanks to the efforts
of our undercover man
Copy !req
660. inside the dope factory,
we have some very interesting facts.
Copy !req
661. Now, that is quite a quantity
of marijuana, gentlemen.
Copy !req
662. It is not a lid, it is not a kilo,
it is not a gram.
Copy !req
663. Just how much do you think
is in this dope factory?
Copy !req
664. A million pounds.
Copy !req
665. - Harry?
- A shitload.
Copy !req
666. Harry.
Copy !req
667. What we do know
is that the dope factory is disguised
Copy !req
668. as an upholstery warehouse.
Copy !req
669. Hey, this is the street, man. Come on.
Copy !req
670. - How can you eat this stuff, man?
- I love them. Don't you like these?
Copy !req
671. I told you not to buy it, man. God.
Copy !req
672. What did you do that for, man?
I would have ate it.
Copy !req
673. You never know what's in that stuff,
man. Could be a dog or something.
Copy !req
674. - You got the address?
- Good dog, man.
Copy !req
675. Hey!
Copy !req
676. - Son of a...
- 181...
Copy !req
677. Is that seven or a one? It looks seven.
Come on. Let's go check this place out.
Copy !req
678. Hey, we're here to pick up the van, man.
Copy !req
679. We're here to pick up the van.
Copy !req
680. Have a seat.
The boss will be right back.
Copy !req
681. Okay. The boss will be right back, man.
He's somewhere else.
Copy !req
682. Those burritos, man.
Copy !req
683. Hey, man, where's the bathroom?
Copy !req
684. - Straight in the back.
- Yeah. Thanks.
Copy !req
685. Come on, cheeks, tighten up.
Copy !req
686. Oh, God.
Copy !req
687. Come on, cheeks, stay together.
Let's stay together.
Copy !req
688. Come on, cheeks, stay together.
Copy !req
689. Oh, God. I hope that was a fart.
Copy !req
690. Oh, shit.
Copy !req
691. Excuse me, sir.
Copy !req
692. What?
Copy !req
693. Where's the toilet?
Copy !req
694. Over there.
Copy !req
695. Hey, excuse me. Where's the toilet?
Copy !req
696. Thank you very much. Oh, shit.
Copy !req
697. Oh, I'm sorry, man.
Copy !req
698. Man, did you eat
one of them burritos, too, man?
Copy !req
699. Supposed to eat
a little bit of ice cream with it.
Copy !req
700. Come on, ice cream.
Copy !req
701. Even though we do not know
what we are looking for,
Copy !req
702. we do know the approximate value
of the weed itself.
Copy !req
703. Gentlemen, I would like
to hear your opinions.
Copy !req
704. A million?
Copy !req
705. The television set alone
is worth close to a million.
Copy !req
706. - A billion dollars.
- Now we're getting somewhere.
Copy !req
707. I'm freezing at 200 million.
Copy !req
708. - Sarge, I think it's four billion.
- You're all wrong.
Copy !req
709. Nine billion big ones, boys.
Copy !req
710. And you know what that means.
Copy !req
711. The better the bust,
Copy !req
712. - the bigger the boost.
- The bigger the boost.
Copy !req
713. Excellent.
Copy !req
714. Well, I guess that about wraps it up.
Copy !req
715. Any questions?
Copy !req
716. Where'd you learn how to
roll them big joints, man?
Copy !req
717. Hey, you like that, man?
Copy !req
718. They're heavy.
Copy !req
719. Yeah, I used to be a roadie
for the Doobie Brothers, you know.
Copy !req
720. What a groovy gig.
Copy !req
721. Yeah. That's how
I learned to play drums.
Copy !req
722. - Oh, yeah?
- Beating on the drums.
Copy !req
723. Hey, I dig Mexico, man.
Copy !req
724. I'd like to come back here
when we got more time.
Copy !req
725. Oh, man, are we at the border already?
Copy !req
726. Looks that way, man.
Copy !req
727. Oh, shit.
Hey, man, well, get rid of the stuff, man.
Copy !req
728. - Oh, yeah. Better get rid of this shit.
- Yeah, hurry up.
Copy !req
729. Man, just put it down, man.
Get rid of it, man. Oh, shit.
Copy !req
730. We're at the border, man.
Copy !req
731. Shit.
Copy !req
732. Lookit.
Copy !req
733. Hey, get rid of it. Not that way, man.
Throw it out.
Copy !req
734. Throw it out.
Copy !req
735. This is Toyota Kawasaki,
Copy !req
736. here at
the Mexican-United States border,
Copy !req
737. where a huge task force
of narcotic and customs agents
Copy !req
738. is preparing a surprise welcome
Copy !req
739. for a vehicle
which they say is constructed
Copy !req
740. entirely of high-grade marijuana.
Copy !req
741. Don't make that face, man.
You make me laugh.
Copy !req
742. Just let me do all the talking, man.
I got it.
Copy !req
743. - Good afternoon, sisters.
- Good afternoon, Officer.
Copy !req
744. How long have you been in Mexico?
Copy !req
745. Okay. Just be cool.
Copy !req
746. How long have you guys
been in Mexico?
Copy !req
747. A week. I mean, a day.
Copy !req
748. Which one is it, a week or a day?
Copy !req
749. A weekday.
Copy !req
750. You got any narcotics
or marijuana in here?
Copy !req
751. Not anymore.
Copy !req
752. You guys better step out of that van.
Copy !req
753. - A fire.
- Oh, Sister, a fire.
Copy !req
754. - I'm on fire.
- What is it?
Copy !req
755. Hey, this looks like a bust. Hey.
Copy !req
756. Get Stedenko on the phone right away.
This might be it.
Copy !req
757. Hey, come on.
What have we got here, Sister?
Copy !req
758. Hey, they're busting nuns, man.
Copy !req
759. - Wow. That's cold-blooded.
- Hey, let's watch, okay?
Copy !req
760. Okay. Up against the wall. All of you.
Copy !req
761. Let's get up against the wall.
Copy !req
762. Sergeant Stedenko,
exactly what are you looking for?
Copy !req
763. Dope, drugs, weed, grass,
toot, smack, quackers,
Copy !req
764. uppers, downers, all-arounders.
You name it, we want it.
Copy !req
765. And how important is it to you
to apprehend the suspects?
Copy !req
766. Critical.
Copy !req
767. The buying and selling of dope
in this country
Copy !req
768. may be the last vestige
of free enterprise left.
Copy !req
769. There's rumor, Sergeant,
Copy !req
770. that the suspects might be
armed and dangerous.
Copy !req
771. Do you expect to see any violence
here today?
Copy !req
772. I certainly hope so.
Copy !req
773. Sergeant, have you yourself
smoked marijuana?
Copy !req
774. Only once.
Copy !req
775. Hey, look, we're on TV, man.
Copy !req
776. - Sergeant, telephone.
- Hi, Mom.
Copy !req
777. - Sounds heavy.
- This could be it.
Copy !req
778. - Why are the cops around here?
- Hey, well, let's find out, man.
Copy !req
779. Yeah. Hey, listen, I got to go pee first.
Copy !req
780. Okay. Don't go scuba diving.
Copy !req
781. So it was a station wagon, huh, Harry?
Copy !req
782. Very devious.
Copy !req
783. They almost look like real nuns,
don't they, Harry?
Copy !req
784. Right down to the stockings.
Copy !req
785. Very clever. Very clever.
Copy !req
786. Not bad.
Copy !req
787. You ought to be ashamed
of yourself, you know that?
Copy !req
788. Reminds me of a funny story
my dad used to tell me, Harry.
Copy !req
789. The only kind of meat
a priest could eat on Friday was nun.
Copy !req
790. Inside!
Copy !req
791. Harry, get a sample of that car.
Copy !req
792. Yes, Sergeant.
Copy !req
793. Start the interrogation, Murphy.
I'll be right back.
Copy !req
794. Hey, what's going on out there, man?
Copy !req
795. Excuse me. What's going on out there?
Copy !req
796. Don't worry about it, buddy. It's nothing.
Copy !req
797. Just some people doing what they're
not supposed to be doing. That's all.
Copy !req
798. Son of a bitch. Look at the...
Copy !req
799. Some asshole pissed on my leg.
Copy !req
800. Listen, our agent
just phoned from Mexico.
Copy !req
801. It's not a bunch of nuns
in a station wagon.
Copy !req
802. It's two hippies in a green van.
Copy !req
803. Must be some heavy shit.
Copy !req
804. Let's go. Come on.
Copy !req
805. Get that siren up!
Copy !req
806. Where would
these two creeps hang out?
Copy !req
807. Where do hippies hang out today?
Copy !req
808. Sunset Strip.
That's where they hang out.
Copy !req
809. Yeah, we could try there.
Copy !req
810. If they're not there,
we can go up to San Francisco.
Copy !req
811. Imagine the field day
those two creeps are gonna have
Copy !req
812. when they find out
that van is made of grass, huh?
Copy !req
813. I don't believe it.
I really don't believe it.
Copy !req
814. You guys are supreme idiots.
Copy !req
815. I mean, how could you
let a big, green van
Copy !req
816. slip right through your fingers?
Copy !req
817. Spend one week at the border,
and what do we end up with?
Copy !req
818. Busting a bevy of nuns,
a guy pisses on my leg,
Copy !req
819. and I lose my special canine sentry dog.
Copy !req
820. Best cop I ever knew.
Copy !req
821. - See anything?
- Negative.
Copy !req
822. Well, use mine. They're on the floor.
Copy !req
823. Oh, yeah. These are great, Sergeant.
You can see everything.
Copy !req
824. What do you see?
Copy !req
825. You know,
there's a great donut shop up there.
Copy !req
826. - Do you think we have time...
- No, no. I mean on the road.
Copy !req
827. Wait a minute. There's the van.
There's the van.
Copy !req
828. Yeah, that's it.
Copy !req
829. Hey, listen, man,
when we get back to town,
Copy !req
830. let's really get serious
about this group, okay?
Copy !req
831. Yeah, really, man.
Copy !req
832. Like, if we practice all the time,
rehearse, man,
Copy !req
833. we could have a heavy band.
Copy !req
834. Let's not let anything interfere
with our music this time.
Copy !req
835. Yeah, that's right.
Hey, you see what I see, man?
Copy !req
836. Yeah. Hey, they're hitchhiking, man.
Copy !req
837. All right.
Copy !req
838. There they go, Harry.
Keep your eye on them.
Copy !req
839. Wonder what
they're doing way out here?
Copy !req
840. I don't know, but here comes
the Mounties to the rescue.
Copy !req
841. Holy...
Copy !req
842. Turn around, Harry. They're over there.
Copy !req
843. Keep your eye on them, Harry.
Keep your eye on them.
Copy !req
844. Hey, man, you know how to drive, man?
Copy !req
845. - Sort of. Why?
- Take over, man.
Copy !req
846. Hey, what are you doing, man?
Copy !req
847. - Hi, ladies.
- Hey.
Copy !req
848. - Hey, après-vous, all of you.
- Thanks.
Copy !req
849. There you go. Watch your step.
Copy !req
850. I'll watch everything else.
Copy !req
851. Hey, what's happening?
Copy !req
852. - How far are you going, man?
- All the way.
Copy !req
853. All right. We're going there ourselves.
Come on over.
Copy !req
854. - There they go, Harry. There they go.
- I see them. I see them.
Copy !req
855. - Shoot their tires out.
- Got it.
Copy !req
856. - No, not yours. Use my gun.
- Thanks, Sarge.
Copy !req
857. Oh, my God.
Copy !req
858. Damn it. You stupid idiot.
Look, you idiot.
Copy !req
859. You are a stupid, stupid man.
Get over here, Harry.
Copy !req
860. Get over here. Give me that gun.
Copy !req
861. When I think of the time and the money
I've wasted on your training,
Copy !req
862. and you still turn out to be
a blithering idiot.
Copy !req
863. You're an utter failure.
You make me sick!
Copy !req
864. Have you anything to say for yourself?
In the car!
Copy !req
865. God, I will never, ever, never
Copy !req
866. take a bald-headed man
in the department again.
Copy !req
867. Wow. This is a neat van.
Copy !req
868. Yeah. Want to see the rest of it?
Copy !req
869. - Okay. Sure.
- Yeah?
Copy !req
870. Oh, hey. We'll go right back there.
The rest of it is right back there.
Copy !req
871. Go ahead. Hey, watch your step.
Yeah. There you go.
Copy !req
872. Yeah, right back there.
Copy !req
873. Hey, have fun at Magic Mountains.
Copy !req
874. Oh, yeah. I see London, I see France.
Copy !req
875. If I ain't out in three weeks, man,
send a search party.
Copy !req
876. Hey, hold on. Don't start without me.
Copy !req
877. Do you want to do a lude?
Copy !req
878. - You got ludes?
- No, I don't have any ludes.
Copy !req
879. I wish I had ludes.
Copy !req
880. I thought you said you had some.
Copy !req
881. No, I don't have some.
I do, but I don't have enough.
Copy !req
882. Oh, right. All right.
Copy !req
883. I wish I had some, you know.
Copy !req
884. I love a manly chest.
Copy !req
885. Yeah. So do I. I mean, on a girl.
Copy !req
886. Attention, all units. Attention,
all units. This is Sergeant Stedenko.
Copy !req
887. Attention, all units.
This is Sergeant Stedenko.
Copy !req
888. We are changing from a code 3,
direct pursuit, to a code 347.
Copy !req
889. Completely lost due to incompetence.
Copy !req
890. Hey, man, you know
where these chicks are going?
Copy !req
891. They're going to the Roxy, man.
Copy !req
892. They're having a battle
of the bands there, man.
Copy !req
893. Debbie was telling me all about it.
Copy !req
894. You know, they're gonna have
all these bands, man,
Copy !req
895. and the winner gets a record contract.
Copy !req
896. - A battle of the bands?
- Yeah.
Copy !req
897. Oh, it's like the best thing in the world.
We're going there
Copy !req
898. and everyone's going to be there
and everything.
Copy !req
899. Yeah. The winner gets a record
contract with real records, man.
Copy !req
900. You know, that's not going to mean dick
unless they promote you, you know.
Copy !req
901. But we could get our band in it, man.
We could enter.
Copy !req
902. We could win it, man, and it's $100, too.
Copy !req
903. We couldn't enter it.
We don't even know any tunes yet, man.
Copy !req
904. What do you mean, man?
We had two rehearsals, man.
Copy !req
905. Besides, it's just punk rock, man.
Copy !req
906. You know, you don't have to
know how to play.
Copy !req
907. All you just got to do is be a punk, man.
We could do that.
Copy !req
908. - Well, we got to get loaded first, though.
- Yeah, we should get loaded.
Copy !req
909. We need some smoke, man.
Jeez, we need to score a lid.
Copy !req
910. Why don't you just stop,
and I'll call Gloria.
Copy !req
911. - Who's Gloria?
- Who's Gloria?
Copy !req
912. Hi. You're looking good.
Copy !req
913. You want to go,
like, powder our noses, you know?
Copy !req
914. Anyway, like, I want to
talk some business, okay?
Copy !req
915. Yeah. I got the powder, all right.
Copy !req
916. She's got the best stuff, I'm telling you.
She cuts it herself.
Copy !req
917. Boy, she can bust me anytime.
Copy !req
918. You should see her summer whites.
Copy !req
919. In here.
Copy !req
920. Wow. That's heavy.
Copy !req
921. Yeah, man, but I bet a lot of cops
smoke dope now, you know.
Copy !req
922. No, I mean, look at that, man.
Looks like a radio station.
Copy !req
923. The request lines are now open,
KGFJ soul radio.
Copy !req
924. Do it now, man.
Copy !req
925. Request lines are now...
Copy !req
926. It's open, man.
Copy !req
927. Go ahead. Go ahead. Say something.
Copy !req
928. All right, Officer Clyde,
contact headquarters
Copy !req
929. and give them our present location.
Copy !req
930. And then I'm going
to take off your dress.
Copy !req
931. And then I'm going to take off your bra.
Copy !req
932. And then I'm going to
take off your shoes.
Copy !req
933. Hello, hello, hello, hello, hello.
Can you hear me?
Copy !req
934. Hello, headquarters?
Hello, headquarters?
Copy !req
935. Come in, headquarters.
Copy !req
936. This is Officer Clyde.
Copy !req
937. Use the code name. The code name.
Copy !req
938. Headquarters.
Headquarters, come in, please.
Copy !req
939. This is code name Hard Head.
Copy !req
940. Hat. Hard Hat. Give me that.
Copy !req
941. Hello, radio dispatch?
This is code name Hard Hat.
Copy !req
942. Code name Hard Hat.
Do you read me? Over.
Copy !req
943. What's that, lard ass?
Copy !req
944. Hard Hat. Code name Hard Hat.
Do you read, radio dispatch?
Copy !req
945. Hey, got something for you, lard ass.
Copy !req
946. Hard Hat. Hard Hat.
Do you understand?
Copy !req
947. Lard ass. Lard ass.
Copy !req
948. Hard Hat.
Copy !req
949. Radio dispatch, do you know
who this is?
Copy !req
950. No. Who is "this is"?
Copy !req
951. This is Sergeant Stedenko.
Copy !req
952. Oh, yeah? You know who this is?
Copy !req
953. No.
Copy !req
954. Bye-bye, lard ass.
Copy !req
955. Attention, headquarters.
Attention, headquarters.
Copy !req
956. This is code name Lard...
Copy !req
957. This is code name Hard Hat.
Code name Hard Hat.
Copy !req
958. Any sighting within the last half hour?
Copy !req
959. - They burned the stash they had.
- Oh, no.
Copy !req
960. Yeah. Can you believe it?
They burned the whole thing yesterday.
Copy !req
961. Oh, no.
Copy !req
962. Yeah, but they're expecting
a new one from Tijuana.
Copy !req
963. - I was in Tijuana once.
- It's supposed to be worth
Copy !req
964. millions and millions of dollars.
Copy !req
965. The cops are out looking for it now.
Copy !req
966. - Jesus, I hope they find it.
- Me, too. Look, if they find it,
Copy !req
967. you want to set aside some lids for me?
Copy !req
968. Well, you can believe that.
We'll have a party.
Copy !req
969. Why don't we just, like, split, okay?
Copy !req
970. Glo, see you.
Copy !req
971. You want me to give
your number to that guy, let me know.
Copy !req
972. Sure do, hey. Take care.
Copy !req
973. - Bye-bye.
- I can't believe
Copy !req
974. - that they burned all the smoke.
- See you.
Copy !req
975. Hey, I got to go to the bathroom.
I'll meet you guys outside, okay?
Copy !req
976. Oh, okay.
Copy !req
977. Hey, holmes.
Copy !req
978. Come on, man.
Copy !req
979. Sometimes when you got to go
really bad,
Copy !req
980. you can't, you know?
Copy !req
981. Come on, man.
You wanted to go out there.
Copy !req
982. I'll put you back in the closet.
Copy !req
983. I think he's got stage fright, man.
Come on, man.
Copy !req
984. Yeah. That's the one.
Copy !req
985. Oh, hey, man.
Thanks an awful lot, man.
Copy !req
986. Hey. Hey. Hey.
Copy !req
987. - Come on. Look at... Hey.
- I'm sorry.
Copy !req
988. Hey, come back... Jesus.
Copy !req
989. Hey, everybody be quiet.
I'm calling home.
Copy !req
990. Hello. Who's this?
Copy !req
991. James. Man, hey, listen.
We got a gig at the Roxy, man.
Copy !req
992. So, get the guys, okay?
Copy !req
993. All right, man.
Be sure to be there and don't be late.
Copy !req
994. All right. See you later.
All right. It's together, man.
Copy !req
995. We're going to be there, man.
Copy !req
996. We're going to take this battle
of the bands. We're gonna do it, man.
Copy !req
997. Does this show?
Copy !req
998. Yeah, they sure do.
Copy !req
999. No. I mean this, this spot.
Copy !req
1000. Let's see. Yeah, a little bit.
Here, I'll take it out for you.
Copy !req
1001. - Will you?
- Yeah. Sure. Just take it off.
Copy !req
1002. Oh, great.
Copy !req
1003. Just stay here.
I'll just do it to here, okay?
Copy !req
1004. Oh, hey, hey, no, man.
Now get in the back.
Copy !req
1005. Get in the back. Get in the back.
Get in the back.
Copy !req
1006. - Okay.
- Get in the back.
Copy !req
1007. Jeez. Jesus.
Copy !req
1008. Hey, Pedro? Pedro?
Copy !req
1009. What's the matter?
Copy !req
1010. - Pedro.
- You still like me, don't you?
Copy !req
1011. - Pedro, come here, man.
- He is so sweet, you know?
Copy !req
1012. Pedro, get out here, man.
Copy !req
1013. Man, where'd you learn
how to drive, man?
Copy !req
1014. Hey, man, we got stopped by the cops,
man. I don't have a driver's license.
Copy !req
1015. Oh shit. Man, why didn't you tell me that
when you started driving?
Copy !req
1016. Well, never mind that, man.
What are we going to do?
Copy !req
1017. Oh, shit.
Copy !req
1018. Well, here, change places with me,
man. Come on.
Copy !req
1019. - I don't think he's seen us.
- No, no. Sit down.
Copy !req
1020. Got my leg caught. Just...
I've got my legs caught.
Copy !req
1021. Man, like, get over, man.
Copy !req
1022. What do you guys want?
Copy !req
1023. Nothing.
Copy !req
1024. You mind if I have a bite of
your hot dog?
Copy !req
1025. Oh, yeah. Yeah, man.
You can have the whole thing.
Copy !req
1026. - Yeah.
- Thanks.
Copy !req
1027. Want some Fritos?
Copy !req
1028. No. This is fine.
Copy !req
1029. Thank you.
Copy !req
1030. Hey, you guys have a nice day.
Copy !req
1031. Thank you.
Copy !req
1032. - Hey, man.
- What?
Copy !req
1033. You're squashing my nuts.
Copy !req
1034. Hey, did that really happen?
Copy !req
1035. What was that dude's trip, man?
Copy !req
1036. I thought we were going to get busted
for sure, man.
Copy !req
1037. - Just a minute. It might be a trick, man.
- Okay. Well, sit there and be cool.
Copy !req
1038. I've got to... Shit.
Copy !req
1039. Look at him, man.
Copy !req
1040. I wonder what he's been smoking.
Copy !req
1041. Well, whatever it is,
I wish we had some, man.
Copy !req
1042. - No kidding.
- Wow, man, look, man,
Copy !req
1043. we got to score some before we go on.
Copy !req
1044. - Yeah, but where, man?
- I don't know, man.
Copy !req
1045. There's got to be somebody in this town
that's got a lot of smoke.
Copy !req
1046. Yeah.
Copy !req
1047. She was, like, nuts.
Copy !req
1048. You could always tell
if she was in the hotel
Copy !req
1049. balling her old man, you know.
Copy !req
1050. Like, everyone would be dozing off,
and all of a sudden she'd start up.
Copy !req
1051. First you'd hear it,
it would start like, you know...
Copy !req
1052. But then she'd, like, really get going,
and she'd be more like, you know...
Copy !req
1053. You know, and she'd start going
like a motorboat, you know?
Copy !req
1054. "Fuck me, Alex."
Copy !req
1055. Her boyfriend's name was Alex.
Copy !req
1056. You know, "Fuck me.
Copy !req
1057. "Fuck me.
Copy !req
1058. "Fuck me, Alex.
Copy !req
1059. "Fuck me, Alex.
Copy !req
1060. "Fuck me, Alex. Fuck me, Alex."
Copy !req
1061. Oh, I got a cramp. No, no.
I got a cramp.
Copy !req
1062. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.
Copy !req
1063. - Oh, God. I got a cramp.
- Yeah. That's just like it, man.
Copy !req
1064. - You're doing good.
- Oh, shit, oh.
Copy !req
1065. - Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah.
- No. No. No.
Copy !req
1066. - Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah.
- No. No.
Copy !req
1067. Oh, God. Oh, God. Oh, yeah.
Copy !req
1068. - There.
- Oh, yeah. That's just like it.
Copy !req
1069. - Oh, shit.
- Then she'd have, like, two tears...
Copy !req
1070. Oh, it's better. It's out. It's out.
It's better.
Copy !req
1071. That feels better. Oh, God.
Copy !req
1072. Shit. I need some air.
Copy !req
1073. Right on, man.
Copy !req
1074. - I didn't know your name was Alex, man.
- Oh, I got a cramp.
Copy !req
1075. Shit, I'd have a cramp there, too, man.
Copy !req
1076. What's going on out here?
Copy !req
1077. Hey, hey. You don't even know
where you're going. Wait for me.
Copy !req
1078. Come on. Make way for the new king.
God damn, you're a star, man.
Copy !req
1079. Go ahead. After you, King Salami.
Copy !req
1080. They're going to be sorry.
Copy !req
1081. Like, I know where
the best dressing room is.
Copy !req
1082. Hey, you know what I'm talking about?
Copy !req
1083. So, the next day, he comes up to me
and he says, "You know,
Copy !req
1084. "thanks for being there.
Like, you saved my life."
Copy !req
1085. - You know?
- Just like Cher.
Copy !req
1086. I don't care what people think about me
Copy !req
1087. Hey, man, what are you doing?
Come on, man. Get it together.
Copy !req
1088. We got to be on
in two more bands, man.
Copy !req
1089. Hey, come on, man. Come on.
Copy !req
1090. You ought to hear
what these other groups are into, man.
Copy !req
1091. These cats are
into something heavy, man.
Copy !req
1092. Look, I've been writing this new song.
Listen to this, man.
Copy !req
1093. Mama talking to me
Trying to tell me how to live
Copy !req
1094. And then it goes...
Copy !req
1095. 'Cause I don't listen to her
'Cause my head is like a sieve
Copy !req
1096. Then it goes...
Copy !req
1097. Hey, man, are you awake?
Copy !req
1098. I don't feel so good, man.
Copy !req
1099. Come on, man. We're on in...
Did you give him some pills?
Copy !req
1100. Yeah, I gave him some pills,
but I gave him ups.
Copy !req
1101. Shit, man. Come on.
Copy !req
1102. Hey, how many fingers you see?
Copy !req
1103. I think I fucked up.
Copy !req
1104. Oh, shit.
Anybody got any coffee or anything?
Copy !req
1105. I got a popper.
Copy !req
1106. We could either, like, you know,
party later or try to start his heart.
Copy !req
1107. I had known. Get up.
Copy !req
1108. Come on. Now, get up.
Copy !req
1109. - Watch where you're going!
- The record person is waiting.
Copy !req
1110. Look, do what you want,
but don't die, you know?
Copy !req
1111. That's what's really important,
like, not dying, you know?
Copy !req
1112. You know what I'm saying?
Copy !req
1113. While I got you here, you know,
I was thinking,
Copy !req
1114. maybe we should have
some paper between us,
Copy !req
1115. because, like, in this business
a handshake doesn't mean dick.
Copy !req
1116. Everybody into the van. Hurry. Hurry.
Copy !req
1117. Come on.
Copy !req
1118. - Murphy, hide. Harry, Luke, come on.
- Look at all these freaks.
Copy !req
1119. There's one of them.
Copy !req
1120. You know, I'm just telling you,
because I feel responsible.
Copy !req
1121. You know what I mean?
Like, you gotta get it together.
Copy !req
1122. Get your whole gig together.
Everything, you know?
Copy !req
1123. I want to be like me.
Copy !req
1124. Like, I have my own special way
of looking and dressing.
Copy !req
1125. That's me.
No one can take it away from me.
Copy !req
1126. Ladies and gentlemen, Taurus.
Copy !req
1127. Piss off!
Copy !req
1128. That's right, boys. Everybody in, boys.
All the way down.
Copy !req
1129. All the way down. That's right, boys.
We want to talk to you boys
Copy !req
1130. about joining your order.
Copy !req
1131. What size sheet do you wear?
Copy !req
1132. - Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait.
- Can we see some tickets, guys?
Copy !req
1133. We don't need tickets. We are
brothers of the faith, Kemo Sabe.
Copy !req
1134. We don't need tickets to walk with love
in the world.
Copy !req
1135. We have a message
for the people inside.
Copy !req
1136. We gotta see some tickets.
We gotta see tickets.
Copy !req
1137. All right.
We are not brothers of the faith.
Copy !req
1138. - We are police officers.
- Sorry, man. You got to have tickets.
Copy !req
1139. - Let's have some tickets, let's go.
- "Let's have some tickets"?
Copy !req
1140. No. That is a gun. That is not a ticket.
Copy !req
1141. Did you bring the ID? Where's the ID?
All right, get the ID.
Copy !req
1142. We have got to get in here right now.
This is very important.
Copy !req
1143. Hey, Sarge. The van. The van.
Copy !req
1144. The van!
Copy !req
1145. Hey, no wonder
Anita Bryant's pissed off.
Copy !req
1146. Hey. Hey. Wait a minute.
Wait a minute. Hey, you.
Copy !req
1147. - Hey, listen, wait a minute.
- Where are you taking this tow truck?
Copy !req
1148. - Yeah.
- Where are you going with our van?
Copy !req
1149. Take a walk.
Copy !req
1150. What do you mean, take a walk?
Who are you?
Copy !req
1151. Hey, wait a minute. Who owns this van?
Copy !req
1152. - Who are you, anyway?
- Sergeant Stedenko.
Copy !req
1153. Sergeant Stedenko. What van?
Copy !req
1154. - What do you mean, what van?
- Let's see some ID here.
Copy !req
1155. - Show him your ID.
- Hold it right there.
Copy !req
1156. Hold it right there. Come back here.
Copy !req
1157. Tell him we didn't do nothing.
We didn't do nothing.
Copy !req
1158. - You didn't do a damn thing, did you?
- No.
Copy !req
1159. - Back up.
- Take it easy. Take it easy.
Copy !req
1160. Hey, you know who he is?
Tell him who you are, boss.
Copy !req
1161. Benny, will you shut up.
I'm gonna tell my...
Copy !req
1162. All right.
We got to call the paddy wagon.
Copy !req
1163. - Affirmative. I'll notify headquarters.
- I can't believe this.
Copy !req
1164. Moving right along,
we don't know who they are,
Copy !req
1165. but here's Alice Bowie.
Copy !req
1166. So, you better be good.
Copy !req
1167. Look, but I'm not just in it
for the money. I really like it.
Copy !req
1168. Hi. Hi. Jade East.
Copy !req
1169. You're the worst.
Copy !req
1170. You guys really had
a scheme going, didn't you?
Copy !req
1171. Thought you'd get away
with it, huh? Yeah.
Copy !req
1172. Almost $9 billion.
Copy !req
1173. Nine billion big ones
to help diseased young minds
Copy !req
1174. with marijuana, smack,
toot, quackers, you name it.
Copy !req
1175. Sarge, the wagons are on their way.
Copy !req
1176. Do you realize that this is the bust?
Copy !req
1177. This is the one
that's gonna send me right to the top.
Copy !req
1178. Nail it down, man. Nail it down.
Copy !req
1179. - Harry?
- What?
Copy !req
1180. Are you sure
you talked to headquarters?
Copy !req
1181. They said they were on their way. Relax.
Copy !req
1182. How about a cheeseburger?
Copy !req
1183. No. A sundae.
Copy !req
1184. - Hot fudge?
- Hot fudge sundae.
Copy !req
1185. With some whipped cream on top, nuts.
Copy !req
1186. - They're anchovies.
- Good. Thanks.
Copy !req
1187. - How many pieces have you had?
- I'll buy you something to eat.
Copy !req
1188. - You are stoned.
- Yeah?
Copy !req
1189. Yes, you are very, very stoned.
Look at this.
Copy !req
1190. Sick. You've got food
all over your uniform.
Copy !req
1191. You've got no self-control whatsoever.
Copy !req
1192. Come on, man. Let's do it.
Copy !req
1193. Do something.
Copy !req
1194. All right. You guys ready to jam?
Copy !req
1195. All right, here we go.
One, two, three. Yeah.
Copy !req
1196. My mama talking to me
Trying to tell me how to live
Copy !req
1197. But I won't listen to her
because my head is like a sieve
Copy !req
1198. My daddy, he disowned me
'cause I wear my sister's clothes
Copy !req
1199. He caught me in the bathroom
with a pair of pantyhose
Copy !req
1200. My basketball coach
He done kicked me off the team
Copy !req
1201. For wearing high-heeled sneakers
and acting like a queen
Copy !req
1202. Why don't you guys admit it?
You got the munchies.
Copy !req
1203. The munchies, right?
Copy !req
1204. I've never been so disgusted
in all my life.
Copy !req
1205. You're a disgrace to the force.
You've let me down, boys.
Copy !req
1206. Harry, are you understanding me?
I am stoned. I am stoned.
Copy !req
1207. So go with it.
Copy !req
1208. - Put it in your sundae.
- Go with it? Get away from...
Copy !req
1209. You tell me to go with it?
Copy !req
1210. You almost botch up
the entire operation,
Copy !req
1211. you lose my best dog,
two guys piss on my leg,
Copy !req
1212. I'm on the verge of a total pig-out
and you tell me to go with it?
Copy !req
1213. I'll go with it!
Copy !req
1214. Go with it. Go with it.
Copy !req
1215. I'm so bloody rich.
Copy !req
1216. I own apartment buildings
and shopping centers.
Copy !req
1217. I only know three chords.
Copy !req
1218. You fools.
Copy !req
1219. More. More. More. More. More. More.
Copy !req
1220. More, more, more.
Copy !req
1221. My mama talking to me
Trying to tell me how to live
Copy !req
1222. Wow. Did you hear that crowd, man?
Copy !req
1223. They gave us a standing ovation, man.
Copy !req
1224. We're going to have a bad band.
Copy !req
1225. Wow, we had them eating
right out of their hands.
Copy !req
1226. We're going to be big, man,
really big, man.
Copy !req
1227. We're gonna, like, be bigger than
Ruben and the Jets, man, I bet you.
Copy !req
1228. Shoot. All we got to do is
keep practicing, man,
Copy !req
1229. you know, like, just keep it together.
Copy !req
1230. I feel good, man. I wish we could have
had something to celebrate, man.
Copy !req
1231. You got a joint or anything?
Copy !req
1232. - Hey.
- What?
Copy !req
1233. We getting pulled over?
Copy !req
1234. I just remembered, man.
I got some hash.
Copy !req
1235. Oh, yeah? Well, fire it up, holmes.
All right.
Copy !req
1236. Hey, I need a pin or something.
Copy !req
1237. Oh, there's a pin right here
on my tutu, man.
Copy !req
1238. Hey, be brave
and be sure to remind me,
Copy !req
1239. we gotta take those back
or we'll get charged for an extra day.
Copy !req
1240. Forgot all about this, man.
Copy !req
1241. We're gonna be a big band, man.
We're going to have a limo, man,
Copy !req
1242. and food backstage, man, everything.
Copy !req
1243. Yeah, we need a manager, though.
That's the only thing.
Copy !req
1244. My cousin.
Copy !req
1245. He doesn't have a job, man.
We'll make him the manager.
Copy !req
1246. Besides that, he's got a van, too, man.
It'll be heavy. Yeah.
Copy !req
1247. We gonna be the heaviest dudes, man.
Copy !req
1248. Get all new instruments,
man, everything, man.
Copy !req
1249. All right. What's this?
Copy !req
1250. - I think it's hash.
- It doesn't look like much, man.
Copy !req
1251. - Where'd it go?
- I don't know.
Copy !req
1252. Hey, watch the road, man.
Copy !req
1253. - Oh, shit.
- Hey, hey! Watch the road!
Copy !req
1254. Oh, shit. Hey, man,
you dropped it in my lap, man.
Copy !req
1255. So I roll un bomber
Copy !req
1256. - Well, stop the car.
- Reach your hand down there.
Copy !req
1257. - Stop the car. Here.
- Get it, get it.
Copy !req
1258. un buen toque
Copy !req
1259. Y después I choke
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1260. Oh, shit.
Copy !req
1261. Y todos mis cares go up in smoke
Copy !req
1262. Come on, let's go get high
Copy !req
1263. Up in smoke
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1264. That's where I want to be
Copy !req
1265. 'Cause when I'm high
Copy !req
1266. The world below don't bother me
Copy !req
1267. When life begins to be
Copy !req
1268. one long and dangerous road
Copy !req
1269. I take a toke
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1270. And all my cares go up in smoke
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1271. All the time
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1272. But I say arrebata
Copy !req
1273. All the gustos you can find
Copy !req
1274. Porque all of the time
Copy !req
1275. Get high time
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1276. Come on, let's go get high
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1277. Up in smoke
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1278. That's where I want to be
Copy !req
1279. 'Cause when I'm high
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1280. The world below don't bother me
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1281. When life begins to be
Copy !req
1282. One long and dangerous road
Copy !req
1283. I take a toke
Copy !req
1284. And all my cares go up in smoke
Copy !req
1285. I take a toke
Copy !req
1286. And all my cares go up in smoke
Copy !req