- 1. Yeah
- 2. Yes, I've never been to Graceland
- 3. Never took that trip
- 4. No, I never been to Vegas
'cept once on a plane
- 5. I never left the airport
- 6. Ain't goin' back again
- 7. Yes, I've never been to Graceland
- 8. In Jailhouse Rock, he was
everything rockabilly's about.
- 9. Nah, nah. I mean, he is rockabilly.
- 10. Mean, surly, nasty, rude.
- 11. In that movie, he couldn't give a fuck
about nothin'. It's, like, rockin' and rollin',
- 12. livin' fast, dying young and
leaving a good-lookin' corpse.
- 13. Some people said he's crazy
- 14. I watched that hillbilly, and
I would wanna be him so bad.
- 15. Elvis looked good.
- 16. I mean, I ain't no fag, but Elvis was
prettier than most women, you know?
- 17. Most women.
- 18. You know, I always said
if I had to fuck a guy—
- 19. you know, I mean, had to—
if my life depended on it—
- 20. I'd fuck Elvis.
- 21. I'd fuck Elvis.
- 22. - Really?
- Well, when he was alive. Not now.
- 23. Well, I don't blame you.
So we'd, uh, we'd both fuck Elvis.
- 24. It's nice to meet people with
common interests, ain't it? Yeah.
- 25. Well, enough about the King.
How 'bout— How 'bout you?
- 26. How 'bout me, what?
- 27. How 'bout you go to the
movies with me tonight?
- 28. - What are we gonna see?
- A Sonny Chiba triple feature.
- 29. The Street Fighter, Return of the
Street Fighter and Sister Street Fighter.
- 30. - Who's Sonny Chiba?
- Who is Sonny Chiba?
- 31. He is, bar none, the finest actor
working in martial arts movies today.
- 32. You wanna take me to a Kung Fu movie?
- 33. 3 Kung Fu movies.
- 34. I don't think so. Not really my cup of tea.
- 35. Ah, all right.
- 36. I had to come all the way from the highway
and byways of Tallahassee, Florida...
- 37. to Motor City, Detroit,
to find my true love.
- 38. If you gave me a million years to ponder,
- 39. I would never have guessed that true
romance and Detroit would ever go together.
- 40. And to this day, the events that
followed all seem like a distant dream.
- 41. But the dream was real and was
to change our lives forever.
- 42. I kept asking Clarence why our
world seemed to be collapsing...
- 43. and everything seemed
so shitty, and he'd say,
- 44. "That's the way it goes.
- 45. But don't forget: It
goes the other way too."
- 46. That's the way romance is.
Usually, that's the way it goes.
- 47. But every once in a while,
it goes the other way too.
- 48. My heart beats, and there's time.
- 49. Don't move, Tojo. You'll be unconscious
soon through lack of oxygen.
- 50. - It's an ancient technique.
- An oxygen—
- 51. Oh, look what happened.
Oh, God, I'm so sorry.
- 52. - That's okay. I'm fine.
- You okay?
- 53. Oh, Jesus. I'm the clumsiest
person in the world.
- 54. It's all right. Accidents happen.
- 55. What a wonderful philosophy.
Thanks for being a sweetheart,
- 56. 'cause you could've been a real dick.
- 57. - Come on. Ready?
- 58. Larry, where are we going?
- 59. Look, we don't know what's
going to be coming next.
- 60. - You mean, you're scared?
- Aren't you?
- 61. Hey, laundromat clothes!
- 62. - Mind if I smoke?
- No, no.
- 63. Listen, do you mind filling
me in on what I missed?
- 64. No, no. Um—
- 65. Let's see. Uh, that guy up there,
that's Sonny Chiba.
- 66. - The Oriental?
- Yeah. The one in black.
- 67. - Want a Goober?
- Uh, no— Yeah.
- 68. In the beginning of the movie,
he was hired to get this guy—
- 69. - You've got popcorn all over you.
- Thanks. That's all right.
- 70. - Is he supposed to be a good guy?
- Uh, well,
- 71. he ain't so much a good guy as
he is just a bad motherfucker.
- 72. He gets paid by people
to fuck guys up, you know?
- 73. You came to see 3 Kung Fu movies?
- 74. - Sure. Why not?
- Nothin', nothin'.
- 75. It's just you're a girl after
my own heart, that's all.
- 76. - Do you know what time it is?
- It's about 12:00.
- 77. I suppose you gotta get up early, huh?
- 78. No, not particularly. How come?
- 79. It's just after I see a movie, I like to
go get a piece of pie and talk about it.
- 80. It's sort of a little tradition I have. Do you
like to get pie after you see a good movie?
- 81. Yeah, I love to get pie after a movie.
- 82. Would like to go get some pie with me?
- 83. Yeah, I'd love some pie.
- 84. In my life
- 85. In that movie, he didn't
give a fuck about nothin'...
- 86. except rock 'n' roll, livin' fast, dyin'
young and leavin' a good-lookin' corpse.
- 87. Enough about the King. How about you?
- 88. - How about me, what?
- Tell me— Tell me about yourself.
- 89. What do you wanna know?
- 90. Well, for starters, uh, what do you do,
where are you from, what's your favorite color,
- 91. who's your favorite movie star,
what kind of music do you like,
- 92. what are your turn-ons, your turnoffs?
- 93. I guess the big question
is do you have a fella?
- 94. Okay. Ask me again, one by one.
- 95. - What do you do?
- I don't remember.
- 96. - Where are you from?
- I don't know.
- 97. - What's your favorite color?
- I don't know. Black?
- 98. - Who's your favorite movie star?
- Burt Reynolds.
- 99. - You want a bite of my pie?
- Yes, I would. A little one.
- 100. All right. Oop. You all right?
- 101. - It's good. You like it?
- Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.
- 102. - What kind of music you like?
- Phil Spector. Girl group stuff like "He's a Rebel."
- 103. What are your turn-ons?
- 104. Mm, Mickey Rourke. A man who can appreciate
the finer things in life, like sugar.
- 105. Elvis's voice, Kung Fu, pot.
- 106. - Turnoffs?
- 107. - Mm-hmm.
- 108. Do you, uh, have a fella?
- 109. Ask me that one a little bit later.
- 110. In a theater full of empty
seats, why did you sit by me?
- 111. 'Cause you looked like a nice guy.
- 112. So I had to dump my popcorn all over you.
- 113. I'll get the check. Where to next?
- 114. - Can I peek?
- Don't peek. Keep your eyes shut.
- 115. All right? All right.
I'm turnin' the lights on.
- 116. Okay. Open 'em.
- 117. Oh, wow! Wow, what a swell place to work!
- 118. Yeah, it's pretty cool. I got the keys,
so I just come in, read comics, play music.
- 119. - You worked here a long time?
- Almost 4 years.
- 120. That's a long time.
- 121. I know, but it's not so bad. I mean,
I'm pretty friendly with most of the customers,
- 122. so I just hang out, you know,
bullshit, read comic books.
- 123. You get paid a lot?
- 124. Uh, no. That's where the trouble
comes into paradise. But—
- 125. the boss, he's a pretty nice guy.
He lets you borrow money from time to time.
- 126. To be lonely
- 127. You wanna see what Spider-Man
number 1 looks like?
- 128. You bet.
- 129. Just great stories, great
characters, beautiful artwork.
- 130. See, in this one here, Nick,
he's gotten this ring for his sweetheart,
- 131. and he wears it around his neck on a chain.
- 132. And later on in the story, he gets
in this fight with this Nazi bastard.
- 133. And the Kraut, he grabs ahold of
the chain. The ring goes overboard.
- 134. But I just don't know
- 135. Nick, he dives into the ocean to get it.
- 136. Isn't that cool?
- 137. - Haven't you heard
- Haven't you heard
- 138. Guess we're just 2 wounded birds
- 139. Now we're both here
- 140. And we're alone
- 141. We still don't know
- 142. What it takes Oh, girl
- 143. We wanna feel love
- 144. We're just so scared
- 145. I know we've got nothing
- 146. - But haven't you heard
- Haven't you heard
- 147. I guess we're just 2 wounded birds
- 148. Oh, we wanna say it
- 149. - And can't find the words
- Can't find the words
- 150. I guess we're just 2 wounded birds
- 151. What is it? Are you cryin'?
What'd I do? Did I do somethin'?
- 152. - You didn't do nothin'.
- What is it?
- 153. I have something I gotta tell you.
- 154. I didn't just happen to be at that
theater. I was paid to be there.
- 155. You were paid to be there? Are you a
theater checker? You get paid to check up...
- 156. on the box office girls, make sure
they're not ripping the place off?
- 157. I'm not a theater checker. I'm a call girl.
- 158. - You're a whore?
- No, I'm a call girl, and there's a difference.
- 159. Here it goes. You know the place you
took me last night, the place you work?
- 160. - Heroes for Sale?
- You got a boss, right?
- 161. - Yeah.
- What's his name?
- 162. - Lance.
- That's him. He called the place where I work.
- 163. He ordered a girl for you.
He said he wanted you to get laid,
- 164. seein' you didn't get out much
and it was your birthday and all.
- 165. He wanted me to act like I just showed up. How
did he know you were gonna be at that theater?
- 166. Uh, well, I go to the movies
every year on my birthday.
- 167. In fact, he called me up this week to find
out what my birthday movie was gonna be.
- 168. - You're not mad?
- No, man.
- 169. I can't tell you— That's one of
the best times I ever had. It was.
- 170. I knew something must be rotten in Denmark.
There was no way you could like me that much.
- 171. I can't tell you how relieved I was when you
took off your dress, you didn't have a dick.
- 172. Stop being so fucking calm about
all this! Go look in your house!
- 173. There's a note on your TV. It says "Dear
Clarence," 'cause I couldn't write any more.
- 174. So I just said, "Alabama, come
clean and just tell him what's what.
- 175. And if he tells you to go back to Drexl and
fuck yourself, then go back and fuck yourself."
- 176. - Drexl? What's a Drexl?
- Please shut up! I'm trying to come clean, okay?
- 177. I've been a call girl for exactly 4 days,
and you're my 3rd customer.
- 178. I want you to know that
I am not damaged goods.
- 179. I'm not what they call in Florida
"white trash." I'm a really good person.
- 180. And when it comes to relationships,
- 181. I'm 100%--
- 182. I'm 100% monogamous.
- 183. - You stay with one guy?
- 184. If I'm with you, then I'm with
you, and I don't want anybody else.
- 185. Now, I gotta tell you something
else. When you said last night...
- 186. was one of the best times you
ever had, did you mean physically?
- 187. Well, yeah. Yeah, but I'm
talking about the whole night.
- 188. I mean, I never had as much fun with a
girl as I had with you in my whole life.
- 189. It's true. You like Elvis. You like Janis.
- 190. You like Kung Fu movies. You
like The Partridge Family.
- 191. - Star Trek.
- Actually, I don't like The Partridge Family.
- 192. That was part of the act.
- 193. Clarence— and I feel
really goofy saying this...
- 194. after only knowing you one night...
- 195. and me being a call girl and all—
- 196. but I think I love you.
- 197. Wait a second.
- 198. Look, I've been tryin' to keep
this whole thing in perspective.
- 199. You just said you love me. Now, if I say I
love you and just throw caution to the wind...
- 200. and let the chips fall where they may,
and you're lyin' to me, I'm gonna fuckin' die.
- 201. I'm not lyin' to you, and I
swear from this moment forth,
- 202. I'll never lie to you again.
- 203. - Whoo-hoo! Well, hello, Mrs. Worley.
- How do you do, Mr. Worley?
- 204. - Top of the mornin' to ya, Mrs. Worley.
- Bottom of the ninth, Mr. Worley.
- 205. - By the way, have you seen your lovely little wife today?
- Are you speaking...
- 206. of my beautiful, charming,
sexy wife, Mrs. Alabama Worley?
- 207. - Why, are there any others, Mr. Worley?
- No. None for me. No.
- 208. - No. No.
- Yes. Yes.
- 209. - It's a nice day for a white wedding
- Excuse me.
- 210. Do you think you could turn
down the heat just a teeny bit?
- 211. It's a nice day to start again
- 212. 'Bama, I gotta ask you a
question. Who and what is a Drexl?
- 213. - He was my pimp.
- You had a pimp?
- 214. - I was a call girl. Call girls have pimps.
- Was he black?
- 215. He thinks he is. He said his mama was
an Apache, but I suspect he's lyin'.
- 216. - Is he nice?
- I wouldn't go so far as to call him nice,
- 217. but he treated me pretty decent.
- 218. I was only there for 4 days. He got
a little bit rough the other day.
- 219. - What do you mean? With you?
- No. My friend Arlene.
- 220. - What did he do to Arlene?
- Slapped her around a little bit, kicked her.
- 221. - It was pretty scary.
- This motherfucker sounds beautiful.
- 222. What'd you do to end up with
a son of a bitch like that?
- 223. - What you motherfuckers talkin' about?
- Floyd say he don't be eatin' pussy.
- 224. Drexl, shit. Any nigga say he don't
eat pussy is lyin' his ass off.
- 225. - I heard that.
- Hold on a second, Big "D." You sayin' you eat pussy?
- 226. Yeah, motherfucker. I eat everything.
I eat pussy. I eat the butt.
- 227. - I eat every motherfuckin' thing.
- If I ever did eat some pussy—
- 228. I would never eat any pussy, right?
But if I did eat some pussy,
- 229. I sure as hell wouldn't tell
no-goddamn-body about it.
- 230. - I'd be ashamed as a motherfucker, man.
- Nigga, you smoke enough Sherm,
- 231. your dumb ass'll do a lot
of motherfuckin' things.
- 232. You'd be up in there suckin' niggas' dicks!
- 233. - Oh.
- Yo, man! Fuck you guys!
- 234. - You guys is fucked up.
- Yo, yo, why you trippin'? We just fuckin' with you.
- 235. In fact, I'm gonna show you what
I mean with a little demonstration.
- 236. Toss me the burner.
- 237. All right. Peep this.
- 238. Pretend it's that fine centerfold bitch.
- 239. Know what I'm sayin'? And you're you.
- 240. You say it ain't tough I got
ya I can't get enough, Get it
- 241. Get it, get it
- 242. Get it
- 243. - Honey, where are you going?
- 244. Johnny!
- 245. - Oh.
- I'm so lonely
- 246. I'm so lonely
- 247. I'm so lonely I could die
- 248. - Well, can you live with it?
- 249. - I said, can you live with it?
- Live with what?
- 250. That son of a bitch walkin' around,
breathing the same air as you,
- 251. gettin' away with it every day.
- 252. - Are you haunted?
- 253. - You wanna get un-haunted?
- Oh, yeah.
- 254. Well, I'd kill him, shoot him in the face,
- 255. put him down like a dog.
- 256. - I can't believe what you're tellin' me.
- I'm just sayin' what I'd do.
- 257. - You'd do that?
- Fuck don't deserve to live.
- 258. Look, he's hauntin' me, you know? I mean,
- 259. I do wanna kill him, but I don't wanna
spend the rest of my life in jail.
- 260. - Hey, man, I don't blame you.
- If I thought I'd get away with it—
- 261. Get away with it? Killing's the hard part.
- 262. Gettin' away with it, that's easy.
You think a cop gives a fuck about a pimp?
- 263. Listen. Every pimp in the world gets shot.
- 264. 2 in the back of the fuckin' head.
Cops'd throw a party, man.
- 265. As long as you're not at the scene of
the crime, smokin' gun in your hand,
- 266. you'd get away with it.
- 267. Clarence, I like you. I always have.
- 268. Always will.
- 269. - 'Bama.
- Where are you goin'?
- 270. I need you to write down
your former address.
- 271. Why?
- 272. Well, so I can go over there and
pick up your stuff. That's why.
- 273. Oh, baby. Come on, Clarence.
I just wanna disappear from there.
- 274. Look, 'Bama, I know he scares the shit out of
you, but I'm not scared of that motherfucker.
- 275. You are completely out of his reach.
He poses no threat to you.
- 276. If he doesn't matter, which he doesn't, it
would seem silly, you to lose all your things.
- 277. - Now, that's all.
- 278. - You don't know him.
- No. You don't know me,
- 279. not when it comes to shit like this.
- 280. I need to do this. I want you to know
that you can count on me to protect you.
- 281. Come on. Please. Just write it down.
- 282. - This isn't a good idea.
- I tell ya, it's gonna be fine.
- 283. I'll be in and out of there.
- 284. - Be careful.
- I will.
- 285. - I love you.
- Love you too.
- 286. - You want something?
- Hey. You Drexl?
- 287. - No, man. I'm Marty.
- Well, I wanna talk to Drexl.
- 288. - What the fuck you wanna talk to him about?
- It's about Alabama.
- 289. He was askin' about Alabama.
- 290. - Where the fuck is that bitch?
- She's with me.
- 291. - Who the fuck are you?
- I'm her husband.
- 292. Well, that makes us practically related.
- 293. You have a seat, boy.
Grab yourself a'egg roll.
- 294. We got everything here from a
Little-Eyed Joe to damned if I know.
- 295. No, thanks.
- 296. "No, thanks"? What that mean, hmm?
- 297. I think you're too scared to be eatin'.
- 298. Now, see, we're sittin' down
here, ready to negotiate,
- 299. and you've already given up your shit.
- 300. I'm still a mystery to you, but I know
exactly where your white ass is comin' from.
- 301. See, if I ask if you want some dinner and
you grab a' egg roll and start to chow down,
- 302. I say to myself, this motherfucker,
he's carryin' on like he ain't got a care.
- 303. And who knows? Maybe he don't.
- 304. Maybe this fool is such a bad motherfucker,
he don't got to worry about nothin'.
- 305. He just sit down, watch my motherfuckin' TV.
- 306. See?
- 307. You ain't even sat down yet.
- 308. Man, that TV over there— Since you been in the
room, there's a woman with her "breastuses"...
- 309. hangin' out, and you ain't
even bothered to look.
- 310. You just been clockin' me.
- 311. I know I'm pretty,
- 312. but I ain't as pretty as a couple of titties.
- 313. Ooh, wee! This child be fierce.
- 314. I'm not eatin' 'cause I'm not hungry.
I'm not sittin' 'cause I'm not stayin'.
- 315. I ain't lookin' at the movie 'cause
I already seen it 7 years ago.
- 316. It's The Mack. Max Julian,
Carol Speed and Richard Pryor.
- 317. I ain't scared of ya. I just don't like ya.
- 318. In that envelope right there is some payoff
money. Alabama is movin' to greener pastures.
- 319. We're not negotiatin'. I don't barter. What's
in that envelope is for my peace of mind.
- 320. My peace of mind is worth
that much, not one penny more.
- 321. It's empty.
- 322. Marty, you know what we got here?
- 323. Motherfuckin' Charlie Bronson.
- 324. Mr. Majestyk?
- 325. Lookie here, Charlie.
- 326. None of this bullshit is necessary.
I don't got no hold over Alabama.
- 327. I was just tryin' to lend
the girl a helpin' hand.
- 328. - Come here, you mother—
- 329. This is what you get...
- 330. if you fuck with me, white boy!
- 331. Talkin' that smack in front
of my motherfuckin' freaks!
- 332. Shit, motherfucker! Your ass gotta be crazy!
- 333. You must've thought it
was white boy day, huh?
- 334. - It ain't white boy day, is it?
- No, man. It ain't white boy day.
- 335. Shit, man. You done fucked up again. Huh?
- 336. Well, well, well. Lookie what we got here.
- 337. "Clarence Worley"?
- 338. It sounds almost like a nigger
name. And I know where you live.
- 339. And I make a million-dollar bet
that Alabama is at the same address.
- 340. Marty, take the car. Go get her.
Bring her dumb ass back here.
- 341. - I think I'll keep lover boy here entertained.
- Roxanne, where's my jacket?
- 342. - Hey, Roxanne!
- Hey, Marty, what the fuck are you doin'?
- 343. - I gotta find my jacket.
- Look in the fuckin' hamper.
- 344. Drexl?
- 345. You! Get a bag and put
Alabama's things in it.
- 346. Wanna get fuckin' shot? Get a bag
and put Alabama's things in it.
- 347. I just did you the biggest
fuckin' favor of your life!
- 348. Open your eyes. I said,
open your fuckin' eyes!
- 349. You thought it was pretty
fuckin' funny, didn't you?
- 350. Well, fuck you! Fuck you, you piece of shit!
- 351. Don't fuckin' move!
- 352. I was selfish. I know I was selfish.
- 353. I was, but I was carrying your child.
- 354. Please don't leave.
- 355. And if I told you—
- 356. I killed him. Want a hamburger or
somethin'? I'm fuckin' starvin' to death.
- 357. - Is this a joke?
- No joke.
- 358. That's probably the best goddamn fuckin'
hamburger I ever had in my entire life.
- 359. I've never had a hamburger taste this good.
- 360. Come on. Eat something. You'll feel better.
- 361. You and I had this one night.
- 362. What the fuck you cryin' for, huh?
- 363. I mean, Christ, he's not
worth one of your tears.
- 364. Would you rather it have
been me? Is that it, huh?
- 365. Is that what you want? I mean,
do you love him? Do you love him?
- 366. I said, do you fuckin' love him, huh?
- 367. - I think what you did wa— - What?
- I think what you did...
- 368. - What?
- was so romantic.
- 369. Yeah.
- 370. - Oh, baby, you're bleeding.
- 371. I got your things right here.
- 372. Clean clothes.
- 373. - I love you.
- I love you.
- 374. There's a God.
- 375. The— These aren't my clothes.
- 376. A little bitty tear let me down
- 377. Spoilin' my act as a clown
- 378. I was all made up not to frown
- 379. But a little bitty tear let me down
- 380. A little bitty tear let me down
- 381. Spoilin' my act as a clown
- 382. Rommel, where are you?
Come here. Come on, boy.
- 383. Get in here. You get in here
now. Get in there. Go on.
- 384. You said you were leavin' tomorrow
- 385. That today was our last day
- 386. I said there'd be no sorrow
- 387. That I'd laugh when you walked away
- 388. A little bitty tear let me down
- 389. Spoiled my act as a clown
- 390. I had it made up not to make a frown
- 391. But a little bitty tear let me down
- 392. Good mornin', Daddy. Hey, Rommel.
- 393. Long time, no see, huh? Oh,
yeah. Good boy. Good boy.
- 394. Now, you're gonna have to excuse the place.
- 395. I haven't been exactly doin'
a lot of entertainment...
- 396. of company as of late.
- 397. I'm sorry if I seem a little tense,
- 398. but you're the last person in the world
that I expected to see this morning.
- 399. That's okay, Dad. I tend to
have that effect on people.
- 400. You, uh, you got anything to drink
around here? I'm dyin' of thirst.
- 401. There should be— There
should be a 7 UP in there.
- 402. Anything stronger? Probably not.
Beer? You can drink beer, can't you?
- 403. I can, but I don't.
- 404. Yeah, that's about all I ever eat.
- 405. Excuse me.
- 406. Hello, hello, hello. I'm his father.
- 407. - How are you?
- That's all right. I'm his wife, Alabama Worley.
- 408. - Pleased to meet ya.
- We got married.
- 409. Yeah.
- 410. Well, lover, why don't you be
a sport and go get us some beer?
- 411. You want some beer? I mean, if
you want some, it'll be here.
- 412. All right? Where is there
a liquor store around here?
- 413. There's a party store down on 54th Street.
- 414. Get a 6-pack of somethin' imported.
- 415. Hard to tell you what to get, 'cause
different places have different things. Here.
- 416. - That should cover it. Okey-dokey.
- Okey-dokey, Doggy Daddy.
- 417. Okay.
- 418. Ain't she the sweetest goddamn thing
you ever saw in your whole life?
- 419. I mean, she— she a 4-alarm fire or what?
- 420. - She seems very nice.
- 421. Daddy, "nice" ain't the word. I mean,
this girl, she's a peach, you know?
- 422. She even tastes like a peach.
- 423. You can tell I'm in
love with her, can't you?
- 424. No. Wait. I gotta talk.
- 425. Clarence, sit down, shut up.
- 426. You're givin' me a fuckin' headache.
- 427. I mean, you're so much like
your mother I can't believe it.
- 428. You're your fuckin' mother through and
through. I haven't heard from you in 3 years.
- 429. You show up all of a sudden
at 8:00 in the morning.
- 430. You walk in here like a goddamn bulldozer.
- 431. And don't get me wrong. I
love you. I'm glad to see you.
- 432. But slow it down, man.
- 433. All right?
- 434. Now,
- 435. when did you get married?
- 436. Daddy, uh...
- 437. I'm in big fuckin' trouble.
- 438. I really need your help.
- 439. No, no, no, no. Stop talking.
- 440. - What do you want from me?
- 441. What do you want from me?
Stop acting like an infant.
- 442. You're here because you want me to help you
in some way. What do you need from me? Money?
- 443. - No. You still have friends on the force?
- Yes, I still have friends.
- 444. Well, then, could you just find out if they
know anything about us? I don't think...
- 445. they know shit, but I don't wanna
think; I wanna know for sure.
- 446. - You could do that, right?
- What makes you think that I could do that?
- 447. - 'Cause you were a cop.
- But what makes you think that I would do that?
- 448. - 'Cause I'm your son.
- Oh, you're my son.
- 449. Oh, you got it, huh, all
worked out, don't you, huh?
- 450. - Oh, yeah.
- Look. I mean, goddamn, I have never
asked you for a goddamn thing.
- 451. But Jesus fuckin' Christ, after Mom divorced
you, did I ever ask you for anything?
- 452. No, I didn't. When I wouldn't see
you for a year and a half to 2 years,
- 453. did I ever get in your shit about it?
- 454. And that whole fuckin' time you were drunk,
did I ever get mad and point my finger at you?
- 455. No, I never did. Everybody
else did, but I didn't.
- 456. Now, look. I just need help, and
you can fuckin' help me, all right?
- 457. Now, I'm basically a pretty resourceful guy.
If I didn't need it, I wouldn't ask.
- 458. I mean, if you wanna say
no, then fine, forget it.
- 459. Don't worry about it. No
problem. I'm goin'. All right?
- 460. The Virgin's back!
- 461. Thank God. I could eat a horse if
you slapped enough ketchup on it.
- 462. - I didn't get you any chicken.
- Well, how come?
- 463. Honey, it's too early in
the morning. It's only 9:00.
- 464. Son of a bitch.
- 465. - Dick Ritchie. Dick Ritchie!
- That's me. I'm me.
- 466. - Come inside.
- 467. Sit. Sit, sit, sit.
- 468. Now, the part you'll be reading
for is one of the bad guys.
- 469. - There's Brian and Marty.
- 470. - Is there a problem?
- No. No.
- 471. Peter Breck has already been
cast in the part of Brian.
- 472. So you'll be reading for the role of Marty.
- 473. In this scene, you're both in a car,
- 474. and Bill Shatner is hanging on the hood.
- 475. What you wanna do is get him off.
- 476. All right. I'm Marty.
- 477. - Ready?
- Yeah. Okay.
- 478. I'm driving. Okay.
- 479. - Where the fuck did he come from?
- I don't know.
- 480. - He just appeared like magic.
- Well, don't just sit there.
- 481. Shoot him.
- 482. Get him!
- 483. Thank you, Mr. Ritchie. I'm very
impressed. You're a very fine actor.
- 484. - Thank you.
- Thank you.
- 485. - We'll let you know.
- 486. - Okay, one-handed.
- One-handed. There we go.
- 487. Then the other one there.
- 488. Here comes the train.
- 489. Well, they found nothing.
- 490. In fact, they think it's drug related.
- 491. Uh, drug related? Why drug related?
- 492. Well, apparently, Drexl had
his big toe stuck in that shit.
- 493. - Really?
- Drexl had an association with a fellow named Blue Lou Boyle.
- 494. - Name mean anything to you?
- 495. Well, if you don't hang around
his circle, no reason it should.
- 496. - Why? Who is he?
- Gangster, drug dealer.
- 497. Somebody that you don't want on
your ass. Now, look, Clarence,
- 498. the more I hear about this Drexl fucker,
- 499. the more I think you did the right thing.
- 500. This guy wasn't just some wild flake.
- 501. No, man. That's what I was
trying to tell you before.
- 502. The guy was like a mad dog.
- 503. So, the cops, they don't
think— They're not after us.
- 504. No. Until they hear something better,
- 505. they'll just assume Drexl had
a falling-out with Blue Lou.
- 506. And once you leave town, I
wouldn't even worry about it.
- 507. Thanks a lot, Daddy. You
really came through for me.
- 508. I got some money I could give you.
- 509. No. Keep it. Keep it.
- 510. Well, now, son,
- 511. I want you to know that, uh,
- 512. I hope everything works
out with you and Alabama.
- 513. I like her.
- 514. And I think you... make a real cute couple.
- 515. Yeah, well, now, you—
you stay out of trouble.
- 516. Hmm?
- 517. Remember, you got a—you got
a wife to think about now.
- 518. Quit fuckin' around.
- 519. Son...
- 520. I love you.
- 521. - All right.
- All right.
- 522. This is my friend Dick Ritchie's
number and address in Hollywood.
- 523. That's where we're gonna be.
- 524. You can get in touch with me through him.
- 525. Come on, Alabama. We're
taking off. Kiss Pops good-bye.
- 526. Bye, Daddy. Hope to see you again soon.
- 527. Hey! Hey! What kind of smackaroo is that?
- 528. - We'll send you a postcard from Hollywood, all right?
- 529. - Alabama.
- Yes, sir?
- 530. - Take care of that one for me.
- Don't worry, Daddy.
- 531. - I'm gonna keep this fellow on a short leash.
- As the sun sets...
- 532. slowly in the West, we
bid you a fond farewell.
- 533. - Bye, Daddy!
- See you later, Pops!
- 534. Son of a bitch was right.
- 535. She tastes like a peach. Come on, Rommel!
- 536. Come on, boy! Come on! Come on!
- 537. Hello.
- 538. - Hello, baby!
- Hello, baby!
- 539. - Clarence?
- You got it.
- 540. Clarence, it's great to hear
from you. What's going on?
- 541. - Well, you are gonna be seeing me shortly.
- You're coming to L.A.? When?
- 542. Uh, tomorrow.
- 543. There is a story behind all that.
I will tell you when I see you.
- 544. And by the way, I ain't gonna be
alone. I am bringing my lovely wife.
- 545. Get the fuck out of here.
Clarence, you got married?
- 546. - I'm a married man, buddy.
- Chantilly lace
- 547. I'm a married man. You wanna say
hello to my better half? Come here.
- 548. - Hi, Dick. This is Alabama Worley.
- How you doing, Alabama?
- 549. Hi. Clarence told me all about you.
He said you were his best friend.
- 550. - So I guess that makes you my best friend too.
- Tell him we gotta go.
- 551. - Clarence says we gotta be going.
- Can I speak to Clarence?
- 552. - Ask him if he got the letter.
- Did you get the letter?
- 553. - What letter?
- What letter?
- 554. - Letters.
- 555. - I didn't get any letter.
- Has he gotten his mail yet?
- 556. - Have you gotten your mail yet?
- Well, no. My roommate Floyd—
- 557. - Has he looked through it?
- Have you looked through it? No.
- 558. Tell him to go look through it.
- 559. Go and, uh— Go look through it.
- 560. Wait. Can I speak to Clarence, please?
- 561. - He wants to talk to you.
- No time. Tell him we gotta go.
- 562. - No time. Read the letter.
- Read the letter.
- 563. Tell him I love him.
Tell him as of tomorrow—
- 564. - He loves you. Honey, hold this.
- All right.
- 565. - As of tomorrow, all of his money problems...
- As of tomorrow,
- 566. - are gonna be over.
- all your money problems are gonna be... over.
- 567. Hello? What money problems?
- 568. Hello? Hello?
- 569. You know what I like
- 570. Chantilly lace and a pretty face
- 571. A ponytail hangin' down
- 572. A wiggle in the walk and
a giggle in the talk, Lord
- 573. Make the world go 'round
- 574. Floyd, you used up the
last piece of toilet paper!
- 575. Make me act so funny Make me spend my money
- 576. Make me feel real loose
like a long-necked goose
- 577. Oh, baby that's-a what I like
- 578. Hey! Hey! Rommel!
- 579. Hey, come here! Rommel! Rommel!
- 580. Frankie, tell Luca to go
outside and do you know what.
- 581. Do you know who I am, Mr. Worley?
- 582. I give up. Who are you?
- 583. I'm the Antichrist. You got
me in a vendetta kind of mood.
- 584. You tell the angels in heaven you've never
seen evil so singularly personified...
- 585. as you did in the face
of the man who killed you.
- 586. My name is Vincent Coccotti. I work
as counsel for Mr. Blue Lou Boyle,
- 587. the man your son stole from.
- 588. I hear you were once a cop, so I can
assume you have heard of us before.
- 589. - Am I correct?
- I've heard of Blue Lou Boyle.
- 590. I'm glad.
- 591. Hopefully, that will clear up the
"how full of shit am I" question...
- 592. you've been asking yourself.
- 593. We're gonna have a little Q and A.
- 594. And at the risk of sounding redundant,
- 595. please make your answers genuine.
- 596. You want a Chesterfield?
- 597. No.
- 598. I have a son of my own,
about your boy's age.
- 599. I can imagine how painful
this must be for you.
- 600. But Clarence...
- 601. and that bitch of a girlfriend of
his brought this all on themselves.
- 602. I implore you not to go
down that road with them.
- 603. You could always take comfort in
the fact you never had a choice.
- 604. Look, I'd like to help you if I
could, but I haven't seen Clarence.
- 605. - You see that?
- Ah, shit!
- 606. - Fuck!
- That smarts, doesn't it?
- 607. To get slammed in the nose.
- 608. Fucks you all up.
- 609. You get that pain shooting through your brain.
Your eyes fill up with water.
- 610. That ain't any kind of fun.
- 611. But what I have to offer you,
that's as good as it's gonna get.
- 612. And it won't ever get that good again.
- 613. We talked to your neighbors.
They saw a Cadillac.
- 614. Purple Cadillac.
- 615. Clarence's purple Cadillac, parked
in front of your trailer yesterday.
- 616. Mr. Worley, you seen your son?
- 617. - I've seen him.
- I can't be sure...
- 618. of how much of what he told you, so...
- 619. in the chance you're in
the dark about some of this,
- 620. let me shed some light.
- 621. That whore your boy hangs around with,
- 622. her pimp is an associate of mine.
- 623. Among his pimping and other affairs,
- 624. he works for me in a courier capacity.
- 625. Well, apparently,
- 626. that dirty little whore found out
we were gonna do some business...
- 627. 'cause your son, the
cowboy, and his flame...
- 628. came into the room
blazing and didn't stop...
- 629. until they were pretty
sure everybody was dead.
- 630. What are you talking about?
- 631. I'm talking about a massacre.
- 632. They snatched my narcotics.
- 633. Hightailed it out of there.
Would have got away with it,
- 634. but your son, fuck-head that he is,
- 635. left his driver's license
in the dead guy's hand.
- 636. - You know, I don't believe you.
- That's of minor importance.
- 637. What is of major fucking
importance is that I believe you.
- 638. Where did they go?
- 639. On their honeymoon.
- 640. I'm getting angry asking
the same question a 2nd time.
- 641. - Where did they go?
- They didn't tell me.
- 642. You just wait a minute and listen to me.
- 643. I haven't seen Clarence in 3 years.
- 644. He shows up yesterday...
- 645. with a young girl, saying
that he got married.
- 646. He asked for, uh,
- 647. some quick cash to go on a honeymoon.
- 648. He asked me if he could borrow $500.
- 649. I felt like helping him,
so I wrote him out a check.
- 650. We went to breakfast in the morning.
- 651. And that's the last I saw of him,
- 652. so help me God.
- 653. They never thought to tell
me where they were going.
- 654. And I never thought to ask.
- 655. No!
- 656. Don Vincenzo.
- 657. You know, Sicilians are great liars.
- 658. The best in the world.
- 659. I'm Sicilian.
- 660. My father was the world heavy
weight champion of Sicilian liars.
- 661. From growing up with him,
I learned the pantomime.
- 662. There are 17 different things a guy can
do when he lies to give himself away.
- 663. A guy's got 17 pantomimes. A woman's got 20.
- 664. A guy's got 17. But if you know
them like you know your own face,
- 665. they'd beat lie detectors all to hell.
- 666. Now, what we got here is a
little game of show-and-tell.
- 667. You don't wanna show me nothing,
but you're telling me everything.
- 668. I know you know where
they are, so... tell me...
- 669. before I do some damage
you won't walk away from.
- 670. Could I have one of those Chesterfields now?
- 671. Sure.
- 672. You got a... match? No. Wait. No, no.
- 673. Don't bother. I got one.
- 674. - You're Sicilian, huh?
- Yeah. Sicilian.
- 675. You know...
- 676. I read a lot,
- 677. especially about things— about history.
- 678. I find that shit fascinating.
- 679. Here's a fact I don't know
whether you know or not.
- 680. Sicilians were spawned by niggers.
- 681. Come again?
- 682. No, it's— it's a fact.
Yeah. You see, uh,
- 683. Sicilians have, uh,
- 684. black blood pumping through their hearts.
- 685. If you— If you don't believe
me, uh, you can look it up.
- 686. Hundreds and hundreds of
years ago, uh, you see, um,
- 687. the Moors conquered Sicily.
- 688. And the Moors are niggers.
- 689. You see, way back then, uh,
- 690. Sicilians were like, uh,
wops from northern Italy.
- 691. They all had blond hair and blue eyes.
- 692. But, uh, well—
- 693. then the Moors moved in there, and...
- 694. well, they changed the whole country.
- 695. They did so much fucking
with Sicilian women...
- 696. that they changed the
whole bloodline forever.
- 697. That's why...
- 698. blond hair and blue eyes
became black hair and dark skin.
- 699. You know, it's absolutely amazing to me...
- 700. to think that to this day,
hundreds of years later,
- 701. that— that Sicilians...
- 702. still carry that nigger gene.
- 703. Now, this—
- 704. No, I'm quoting history.
- 705. It's written. It's a fact. It's written.
- 706. - I love this guy.
- 707. Your ancestors are niggers. Huh?
- 708. Hey.
- 709. Yeah.
- 710. And— And your
- 711. fucked a nigger.
- 712. Yeah. And she had a half-nigger kid.
- 713. Now, if that's a fact, tell me,
- 714. am I lying?
- 715. 'Cause you—
- 716. you're part eggplant.
- 717. Huh? Hey, hey, hey.
- 718. You're a cantaloupe.
- 719. That's beautiful.
- 720. I haven't killed anybody...
- 721. since 1984.
- 722. Go to this comedian's son's apartment.
- 723. Come back with something that
tells me where that asshole went...
- 724. so I can wipe this egg off my face.
- 725. Fix this fucked-up family for good.
- 726. Hey, boss.
- 727. Get ready to be happy.
- 728. Morning, everybody.
It's 6:22 here in L.A.
- 729. I'm David Perry at K.B.L.U.
- 730. Hello? Hi.
- 731. Floyd.
- 732. Floyd. Can't you answer
the door at least for me?
- 733. Oh, man, I didn't even hear it.
- 734. Hello?
- 735. - You can't help me out every now and then?
- 736. Yes.
- 737. You call for a date?
- 738. - Hey!
- I knew it was you! How you doing?
- 739. - Dick, this is Alabama. Alabama, this is Dick.
- Nice to meet you.
- 740. - How long have you been living here?
- Hi. I'm Alabama.
- 741. - Clarence, you look good.
- This is a great place. This is nice.
- 742. I'm starving. Let's get
something to eat. Who's this?
- 743. - It's Floyd.
- Floyd. Let's go.
- 744. Okay, Floyd, watch yourself. Be careful.
- 745. Hey.
- 746. Hey, I didn't tell you guys yet?
- 747. I had this really, really good
audition for TJ Hooker the other day.
- 748. - You're gonna be on TJ Hooker?
- Yeah. It's the new TJ Hooker.
- 749. - Knock on wood.
- You get to meet Captain Kirk?
- 750. Well, you don't get to
meet him in the audition.
- 751. But if I get the part— Hope, hope.
- 752. - That would be amazing.
- It would be cool. It would be a real—
- 753. Meeting Captain Kirk, that would be cool.
- 754. Here we are.
- 755. The honeymoon suite.
- 756. You're really in love, aren't you?
- 757. Very first time in my life.
You know what that's like?
- 758. No.
- 759. - Nah.
- Shut the fuck up. Hey.
- 760. What are you doing in L.A. anyway, huh?
- 761. Holy Mary, Mother of God.
- 762. This shit can't be real.
- 763. - It'll get you high.
- 764. - I said, it'll get you high.
- Hey, we got cable.
- 765. - You want some wine, sweetheart?
- Yeah, just a little bit.
- 766. I'm not much of a wine gal.
- 767. This stuff is fucking real.
This is fucking real, Clarence.
- 768. - I certainly hope so.
- You've got a hell of a lot of cocaine here, man.
- 769. - I know.
- Do you realize how much fucking coke you have here?
- 770. No. Tell me.
- 771. I don't know, but it's a fucking lot.
- 772. This is— This is Drexl's coke?
- 773. No, Drexl's dead, you
see. It's Clarence's coke.
- 774. And Clarence, he can do
whatever he wants with it.
- 775. What Clarence wants to do is to sell it.
- 776. Then me and 'Bama, we're gonna jump a jet plane
and spend the rest of our lives spending it.
- 777. You got my letter? You
lined up buyers for me?
- 778. - Listen, Clarence, I'm not Joe Cocaine, okay?
- You're an actor.
- 779. I hear these Hollywood guys get it
delivered to the set all the time.
- 780. Well, they do, all right? They do.
- 781. And maybe one day, when I start being a
successful actor, I'll be like one of those guys.
- 782. But until that day, I ain't got nothing.
- 783. I don't have a pot to piss in or a window
to throw it out. All I got is fucking Floyd.
- 784. If you want me to help you sell a little
bit at a time, that's all I can do.
- 785. No, no. None of that
- 786. It's got to be the whole enchilada in one
shot, and that's the way it's gotta be.
- 787. Clarence, do you have any idea
how difficult that's gonna be?
- 788. What the fuck are you talking about?
- 789. I'm offering half a million dollars' worth
of white for 200 grand. That's difficult?
- 790. Very difficult. That's very
difficult, do you understand?
- 791. It's difficult because you're
selling to a particular group.
- 792. Fat cats. Big shots. Guys
who can afford $200,000.
- 793. And guys who can use a whole
fucking suitcase full of cocaine.
- 794. Basically, Clarence, guys I don't know.
- 795. And guys you don't know. And more
importantly, they don't know you.
- 796. Come on, Dick.
- 797. Okay, Clarence. Listen.
- 798. There's one guy that I know
that can help you out, Clarence,
- 799. but... I'm not guaranteeing you anything.
- 800. Is he big league?
- 801. No. He's not big league. Okay?
- 802. But he works as an assistant to a very
big movie producer named Lee Donowitz.
- 803. Lee Donowitz could afford and can use...
- 804. $200,000 worth of coke,
- 805. - being that that's what you have.
- So what did you tell him?
- 806. What the fuck you expect
me to tell him, huh?
- 807. I didn't know what the hell
was bullshit and what wasn't.
- 808. And besides, Floyd smoked the
2nd page of the letter. Okay?
- 809. What's this acting class guy's name?
- 810. Elliot.
- 811. Elliot what?
- 812. Elliot Blitzer.
- 813. Okay, we'll get him on the phone
and we'll arrange a meeting...
- 814. so we can get through all
this getting-to-know-you stuff.
- 815. - Where?
- Where should we meet?
- 816. - Roller coaster.
- Roller coasters.
- 817. So, you got, uh—you got
$500,000 worth of cola...
- 818. that you're unloading for $200,000.
- 819. - You want an animal cracker?
- Um, thanks.
- 820. Wait. Save the gorillas.
- 821. Thanks.
- 822. That's all right. Anyway, thanks.
- 823. So, you got—you got
$500,000 worth of cola...
- 824. that you're unloading for $200,000.
- 825. "Unloading." That is a hell of a way
to describe the bargain of a lifetime.
- 826. Where did you get it?
- 827. Where did I get it?
- 828. I, uh— I grow it on my windowsill.
- 829. See, the light's really good up there.
I'm up high enough off the street...
- 830. so you can't see it.
- 831. - It works perfectly.
- 832. Where, really— where
does it come from?
- 833. - Where does it come from? Coca leaves.
- 834. - You know what? I'm out of here.
- Elliot, chill out.
- 835. Sit down here. All right? We're both here.
- 836. We might as well enjoy the ride. I'll
tell you, okay? But keep it quiet.
- 837. If Dick didn't ensure me you're good people,
I'd just tell ya, "None of your fucking business."
- 838. - Okay, okay, okay.
- This is gonna be fun.
- 839. Let's go!
- 840. The truth of the matter is,
I got a friend in the department.
- 841. What department?
- 842. "What department?" What
do you think, 8 ball?
- 843. - The police department?
- Give the man a prize!
- 844. About a year and a half ago, this friend
of mine got access to the evidence room,
- 845. and he snagged this coke, but he's
a good cop with a wife and a kid.
- 846. So he held on to it for
about a year and a half,
- 847. - until he found a guy he could trust.
- And he trusts you?
- 848. Yeah. We were in 4-H together. We've known
each other since childhood. I'm handling sales.
- 849. He's my silent partner. He knows if I
get fucked up, I won't drop dime on him.
- 850. Okay? Now, no further, you understand?
- 851. He's kind of paranoid. I didn't tell
you nothing. You didn't hear nothing.
- 852. I didn't hear nothing!
- 853. Here we go!
- 854. Ride it out, baby!
- 855. Yeah!
- 856. We're going in for another
one! Hang on, Elliot! Whoo!
- 857. Oh, yeah, we got this
puppy. This was a good idea.
- 858. Elliot looks a little green.
- 859. Elliot, do I look like a
beautiful blond with big tits...
- 860. and an ass that tastes like
French vanilla ice cream?
- 861. What?
- 862. Do I look like a beautiful
blond with big tits...
- 863. and an ass that tastes like
French vanilla ice cream?
- 864. No.
- 865. No. Okay, then why are you
telling me all this bullshit, huh?
- 866. - What, you wanna fuck me?
- 867. - He's sick.
- Let me handle this, all right?
- 868. Look. You know what? Just get it straight.
- 869. Lee is not into taking risks, okay?
- 870. He's got a couple of guys. He's
been dealing with them for years.
- 871. They're reliable, they're
dependable, and they're safe.
- 872. Riddle me this, Batman.
- 873. If you're all so much in love with each other,
what the hell are you doing here?
- 874. I'm sure you got better
things to do with your time...
- 875. than hang around upside down
on a roller coaster all day.
- 876. Your guy is interested because with
that much shit at his fingertips,
- 877. he could play Joe-fucking-Hollywood
until the wheels come off.
- 878. He can sell it. He can snort it.
- 879. He can play Santa Claus with
it as far as I'm concerned.
- 880. At the price he's paying, he's gonna be
able to afford to just throw it around.
- 881. He's gonna be everybody's
best friend, all right?
- 882. I mean, I'm not putting him down here.
- 883. It's his money. Let him do
whatever the hell he wants.
- 884. But don't expect me and my
friends to hang around forever,
- 885. waiting for you guys to grow some guts.
- 886. - Yeah, hello?
- Hi, Lee.
- 887. Elliot, it's Sunday. Can you tell
me why I'm talking to you on Sunday?
- 888. I don't see enough of you all week,
I gotta talk to you on Sunday too?
- 889. I'm with that party that you
wanted me to get together with, Lee.
- 890. - You know who I'm talking about?
- I don't believe this.
- 891. Elliot, why the hell are you
talking to me on my phone about that?
- 892. Well, because I'm standing—
I'm standing with the guy,
- 893. and he insists on talking to you.
- 894. Are you out of your fucking mind?
- 895. He said that if I didn't get
you on the phone, he would—
- 896. Hello, Lee. It's Clarence. At last we speak.
- 897. First of all, Lee,
I'm a really big fan of yours.
- 898. That's why I wanna open Dr. Zhivago in L.A.
- 899. And I need you and your
abilities to distribute it.
- 900. Uh, Clarence. Uh—
- 901. I don't know, Clarence.
Dr. Zhivago is a pretty big movie.
- 902. The biggest movie you've
ever dealt with, Lee.
- 903. We're talking a lot of film here.
- 904. A man would have to be an idiot not to be a
little bit cautious about a movie like that.
- 905. And, Lee, you are no idiot.
- 906. No, no. I'm not saying I'm
not interested, Clarence.
- 907. Being a distributor is not what I'm all
about. I'm a movie producer, you know?
- 908. I am on this earth to make good movies.
- 909. Nothing more and nothing—
well, maybe less sometimes.
- 910. Hey!
- 911. Choose a fucking lane!
- 912. No, not you. Just some idiot—
Don't give me the finger!
- 913. I'll fucking have you killed!
- 914. The bottom line is, I am not Paramount.
You know what I'm saying?
- 915. I got a select few distributors I deal with.
- 916. I buy their little movies, and I
accomplish what I wanna accomplish...
- 917. and get the fuck out of there.
- 918. Very businesslike, very easy
and very little risk, Clarence.
- 919. Lee, we're talking Dr. Zhivago. This will
be packing 'em in for a year and a half.
- 920. 2 years. That is 2 years
you're not gonna have to deal...
- 921. with anybody else's movie but mine.
- 922. Nobody's but yours. Well,
what is the rush here?
- 923. I just wanna be able to
announce this deal at Cannes.
- 924. If I had time for a courtship, Lee, I would.
I'd take ya out, hold your hand, kiss your cheek.
- 925. But I'm not in that position.
- 926. I need to know right now if you
and I are in bed together or not.
- 927. If you want my movie, you're gonna have
to come to terms with your fear and desire.
- 928. Uh-huh. Fear and desire, huh, Clarence?
- 929. Don't you know that my films have
grossed more than 2.8 billion, Clarence?
- 930. - Let me talk to Elliot. Let me talk to Elliot.
- You wanna talk to Elliot?
- 931. Elliot, he wants to talk to you.
- 932. - Hi, Lee.
- Elliot, where do you know this guy from?
- 933. He's, uh— He's a friend of Dick's, remember?
- 934. Who the fuck is Dick?
- 935. You— You—
You want me to... suck his dick?
- 936. - No. Who the fuck is Dick?
- Oh, who the fuck is Dick?
- 937. - Yeah.
- Dick is my friend. He's in my acting class.
- 938. - You told him I'm an actor?
- Is he any good? Is he talented?
- 939. Really? How does Dick know this guy?
- 940. - Tell him—
- They—They grew up together.
- 941. Okay, uh, Wednesday at the hotel, 3:00.
- 942. Bring the whole fucking cast, all right?
- 943. Elliot, don't call me here anymore,
especially not on Sunday, all right?
- 944. - What did he say?
- Just hold on a second.
- 945. - Did you tell him—
- Shut up for a second. Hey, you guys.
- 946. This is what's gonna happen.
- 947. 3:00, Beverly Ambassador. He
wants to see everybody. Okay?
- 948. And he'll talk to you. If after
talking to you he likes you,
- 949. wants to deal with you, he'll deal with you.
- 950. If he doesn't, he'll say fuck you,
and he'll walk out of the room.
- 951. - Did you tell him—
- Shut up for a second.
- 952. And he wants a sample bag.
- 953. - No problem on all counts.
- 954. Did you tell him I was an actor?
- 955. - Yes, I told him.
- You told him I was good?
- 956. Yeah, I lied.
- 957. - Hi.
- How you doing?
- 958. - Oh, pretty good.
- You Dick? Dick Ritchie?
- 959. No. No, he's not here right now.
- 960. - You live here?
- Yes, I do.
- 961. You're sort of, uh, roommates?
- 962. Exactly roommates.
- 963. Maybe you can help me. I'm
looking for a friend of mine.
- 964. - Sure.
- Clarence Worley from Detroit?
- 965. - He's traveling with a real pretty girl named Alabama?
- Oh, yeah, man, I know 'em.
- 966. - They've been by here.
- You've seen 'em?
- 967. - Mm-hmm.
- They staying here?
- 968. No, they're staying at the...
- 969. Safari Motor— Motel Inn.
- 970. - Safari Motel.
- Safari Motel?
- 971. Yeah.
- 972. How do you know that?
Have you been over there?
- 973. No. They were here,
- 974. and they said that they
were going to go there.
- 975. Then they went.
- 976. - Yeah?
- Yeah. Safari— Safari Motel.
- 977. Safari Motel.
- 978. Hey, you wanna watch some
TV? They might be back here.
- 979. - No. No, thank you. Thank you, though.
- 980. - You take care. I might be back.
- 981. Good. Be cool.
- 982. Don't condescend to me, man.
- 983. I'll fucking kill you, man.
- 984. I'm so proud of you. Did I do my part okay?
- 985. - Alabama, you were perfect.
- Like a ninja?
- 986. Like a ninja. I'm gonna go
grab us something to eat.
- 987. I'm gonna go jump in the tub and
get all wet and slippery and soapy...
- 988. and hop in that water bed
and watch X-rated movies...
- 989. till you get your ass
back in my lovin' arms.
- 990. Hurry back now.
- 991. We now return to Bullitt,
already in progress.
- 992. You give your love
- 993. So sweetly
- 994. Hi.
- 995. Hi!
- 996. Hi.
- 997. - Cigarette?
- 998. That's a very nice outfit.
- 999. Oh. This?
- 1000. I got this in Las Vegas, Nevada.
- 1001. Alabama, where's our coke,
and, uh, where's Clarence?
- 1002. When's he coming back?
- 1003. I'm sorry. I think you have the wrong room.
- 1004. My name is Sadie.
- 1005. We don't have any Coke, but there's
a Pepsi machine down the hall.
- 1006. I don't know anybody named Clarence,
but perhaps my husband does.
- 1007. You can ask him,
'cause he'll be home in a minute.
- 1008. He plays football.
- 1009. He's just at practice.
- 1010. - Give me your hand.
- 1011. You are unbelievably cute.
- 1012. Thank you. Thanks.
- 1013. Let me see those eyes.
- 1014. What a face.
- 1015. Do me a favor. Turn around for me.
- 1016. Okay.
- 1017. No, go the other way.
- 1018. Okay.
- 1019. Ooh. That hurts, don't it?
- 1020. Get on your feet, sweetie.
You ain't hurt that bad.
- 1021. Now, where's our coke? Where's Clarence?
And when's he coming back?
- 1022. Okay. Okay.
- 1023. Fuck you.
- 1024. Fuck me.
- 1025. What's the matter, baby, huh?
- 1026. Can't breathe?
- 1027. You better get used to that.
- 1028. - Mmm. Smells like hamburgers in here.
- 1029. Tell me, what is the biggest,
fattest hamburger you guys got?
- 1030. That would be Steve's
double chili cheeseburger.
- 1031. Give me 2 of them bad boys, 2 chili fries
- 1032. - and, uh, 2 large Diet Cokes.
- Anything else?
- 1033. Come here. Look at yourself!
Look! Take a good look!
- 1034. You think your boyfriend would go for this
shit? If you do, you're fucking stupid.
- 1035. You're a very pretty girl, but you
ain't gonna be very pretty for very long.
- 1036. I'm gonna ask you a fucking question,
- 1037. and you give me the right fucking answer!
- 1038. Now,
- 1039. where's my coke?
- 1040. Turn around. Turn around.
- 1041. Answer me!
- 1042. Come on.
- 1043. You got a lot of heart, kid.
- 1044. Now, that is a great issue.
- 1045. You gotten to the story on Elvis yet?
- 1046. No, I hadn't.
- 1047. That is probably the single best piece
I have ever read on Elvis Presley...
- 1048. in my entire life.
- 1049. Look. It tries to pin down what the
attraction is after all these years.
- 1050. It covers the whole spectrum.
- 1051. Talks to the fans, people who grew up
with him, people who love his music.
- 1052. Then there's the fanatics. Right?
- 1053. I don't know about you,
but they give me the creeps.
- 1054. - Yeah, yeah, I see what you mean.
- I mean, look at her.
- 1055. It looks like she fell off the ugly tree
and hit every branch on the way down.
- 1056. Now, the first time you kill
somebody, that's the hardest.
- 1057. I don't give a shit if you're
fucking wired up or Jack the Ripper.
- 1058. Remember that guy in Texas? The guy in
that fucking tower, killed all them people?
- 1059. I bet you green money, that first
little black dot he took a bead on,
- 1060. that was the bitch of the bunch.
- 1061. 1st one is tough. No fucking fooling.
- 1062. The 2nd one ain't no
fucking Mardi Gras either,
- 1063. but it's better than the 1st, 'cause you
still feel the same thing, except it's diluted.
- 1064. You know, it's— it's better.
- 1065. I threw up on the 1st one. You believe that?
- 1066. Then the 3rd one—
- 1067. The 3rd one is easy. You level right off.
- 1068. That's no problem. Now—
- 1069. Shit.
- 1070. Now I do it just to watch
their fucking expression change.
- 1071. I don't fucking believe it.
- 1072. Did you put it under the bed?
- 1073. I can't believe it. You put
it under the fucking bed.
- 1074. I didn't look under the fucking bed.
- 1075. I can't believe you put
it under the fuckin' bed,
- 1076. and I can't believe I didn't
look under the fuckin' bed.
- 1077. I'm gettin' fuckin' old.
- 1078. Journey's end, baby.
- 1079. Snow at the end of the rainbow.
- 1080. One less thing I gotta fuckin' worry about.
- 1081. This is it, baby.
- 1082. Moment of truth.
- 1083. You got a lot of heart, kid. You know that?
- 1084. Wanna play?
- 1085. Is that what you want?
- 1086. You wanna play with Daddy?
- 1087. Come on. Come on. I'll give
you one shot 'cause I like you.
- 1088. Stick it in me, baby.
Come on. Stick it in Daddy.
- 1089. Stick it in me. Go ahead.
- 1090. Come on! Come on! Come on!
- 1091. Motherfucker!
- 1092. - All right. No more Mr. Fuckin' Nice Guy.
- Oh, God.
- 1093. What do you think of that, baby?
- 1094. What do you think about that?
What do you think about that?
- 1095. Wait! Wait!
- 1096. What?
- 1097. - Hey, what the fuck are you laughing at?
- You look ridiculous!
- 1098. Come here! I look fuckin'
ridiculous? Get up! Laugh it up!
- 1099. Come on, laugh it up! You were
in hysterics a minute ago! Laugh!
- 1100. - You like that, don't you?
- Fuck you!
- 1101. Shit! Fuck!
- 1102. Fuck! Come on. We gotta
go. Baby, we gotta go.
- 1103. Jesus Christ!
- 1104. Come on, darlin'. We gotta
get the fuck out of here.
- 1105. Come on.
- 1106. Come on. The cops are gonna
be here any fuckin' second.
- 1107. Fuck!
- 1108. Fuck! Come on.
- 1109. Fuck. Come on. I'm sorry.
- 1110. Fuck! Fuck!
- 1111. I'm sorry. Oh, fuck!
- 1112. I'm sorry. I'm sorry.
- 1113. Get the fuck out of the way!
- 1114. Those eyes, those thighs They're part
- 1115. Oh, fuck!
- 1116. - Fuck!
- 1117. I don't fuckin' believe this!
Goddamn it! I fucking knew it!
- 1118. I should have my goddamn head
examined for driving like this.
- 1119. Look, Carla— Kandi,
you've gotta help me.
- 1120. - What can I do?
- Take this. Hold this.
- 1121. - What, are you high? No.
- Fucking put this in your purse.
- 1122. - I'm not gonna put that shit in my purse.
- He's not gonna search you.
- 1123. You didn't do anything.
Just put it in your bra.
- 1124. - I'm not wearing one.
- Please! He's almost here! Just put it in your pants!
- 1125. - No.
- You are the one that wanted to drive fast.
- 1126. Read my lips. No!
- 1127. - After all I did for you, you fucking whore.
- 1128. Who the fuck do you think you're—
- 1129. Hi.
- 1130. Look, dick-head, it's your bad
luck that we caught you speeding,
- 1131. and it's your bad luck that
you had a bag of uncut cocaine.
- 1132. - Not a tiny little vial.
- A fuckin' baggy.
- 1133. Hey, you got caught. It's all fun
and fuckin' games till you get caught.
- 1134. But now we got you, okay, Mr. Elliot
Fuckin' Actor. You just made the big time.
- 1135. - You're no longer an extra.
- Or a bit player.
- 1136. - Or a supporting actor.
- You're a fuckin' star.
- 1137. You're a fucking star, and you're gonna
be playing your one-man show nightly...
- 1138. for the next 2 fuckin'
years for a captive audience!
- 1139. Listen to this. You get out in
a few years, meet some old lady,
- 1140. you'll get married, and you'll be so
understanding to your wife's needs...
- 1141. because you'll know what
it feels like to be a woman.
- 1142. You'll only want to fuck her in the ass because
that pussy won't be tight enough anymore.
- 1143. Good point, Detective.
Right? Fuckin' faggot.
- 1144. Krinkle, this is it. We
got it, and it's all ours.
- 1145. - You talk about fallin' into something.
- We got it.
- 1146. Will both you idiots shut
up? I can't understand shit.
- 1147. What happened? What are you talking about?
- 1148. Okay. A patrol car pulls a guy over for
speedin', right? Suspect's covered with coke.
- 1149. They bring the suspect to me and
Nicholson, and we go to work on him.
- 1150. - "Nicholson and I."
- What's the fuckin' difference?
- 1151. So we go to work on the guy, and we
know something's rotten in Denmark,
- 1152. 'cause this guy's fuckin' stupid, and
he's got a big bag of coke and it's uncut.
- 1153. And you ain't gonna fuckin'
believe what he's got to say.
- 1154. Seems a cop from some department—
we don't know which one—
- 1155. stole a half a million dollars
of coke from the property cage.
- 1156. Had been sittin' on the
shit for a year and a half.
- 1157. - The cops got this weirdo who's a front for him.
- Suspect's words.
- 1158. Our guy, Elliot Blitzer, he's making
a deal between them and his boss,
- 1159. a big-time fuckin' movie
producer named Lee Donowitz.
- 1160. He did the movie Coming Home in a Body Bag.
- 1161. - A Vietnam movie? Good fuckin' movie.
- 1162. - Fuckin' "A."
- Great fuckin' movie.
- 1163. - So, you believe him?
- I believe he believes him.
- 1164. This guy's too fuckin' rattled
to be lyin'. He'd roll over...
- 1165. on his mommy, daddy, 2-pantied granny and
the King of Siam if he had anything on them.
- 1166. This guy was a sissy. This rabbit
will do anything not to do any time.
- 1167. You know what he'll do? He'll wear a wire.
- 1168. - He'll wear a wire?
- He'll wear a wire. We talked to him.
- 1169. Dirty cops. We gotta get
Internal Affairs on this.
- 1170. I don't give a shit who you bring in.
You can bring in the militia, L.A. Thunderbirds,
- 1171. the ghost of Steve fuckin' McQueen,
10 fuckin' Roman gladiators.
- 1172. I don't give a shit as long as me
and Todd get credit for the bust.
- 1173. Listen, we found him. We
just want the fuckin' collar.
- 1174. That's it. End of story.
- 1175. - You got it.
- Fuckin' "A."
- 1176. Have I ever told you how much I hate airports?
- 1177. See, I used to live by one
back in Dearborn, you know?
- 1178. Really frustrating living next to
an airport when you ain't got shit.
- 1179. All day long I'm seeing
and hearing people...
- 1180. doing exactly what I wanna
be doing but couldn't.
- 1181. What?
- 1182. Starting new lives, leaving Detroit.
- 1183. Vacations, business trips.
- 1184. Fun, fun, fun.
- 1185. You all right?
- 1186. You and me, we can jump on any one of those
planes out there and go anywhere we want.
- 1187. It gives me a whole new
outlook. Love airports now.
- 1188. Yeah, you ain't kiddin'. We
got our lives to start over.
- 1189. We should go somewhere where we
can really start from scratch.
- 1190. I've been in America all my life.
- 1191. I've always wanted to see what
TV in other countries looks like.
- 1192. Where do you think we should
go, my little turtle dove?
- 1193. Cancun.
- 1194. Cancun? Why Cancun?
- 1195. It's got a nice ring to
it. It sounds like a movie.
- 1196. Clarence and Alabama Go
to Cancun. Don't you think?
- 1197. In my movie, darling, you get top billing.
- 1198. Don't you worry about nothin', all right?
- 1199. It's all gonna work out for us.
- 1200. We deserve it.
- 1201. Floyd, you're sure that's how
you get to the Beverly Ambassador?
- 1202. Yeah, man, I'm positive.
- 1203. - Yeah, well, if we get lost, that's your ass.
- 1204. - Why don't you get out of my beer and get a fuckin' job?
- Yeah, okay.
- 1205. - Can we go?
- We're out the door.
- 1206. I gotta meet Elliot in the
lobby. I don't want to be late.
- 1207. I just want to make sure
we got everything. Let's go.
- 1208. - Yes?
- I'm out. I'm out, Floyd.
- 1209. - Are you here? No, he's not here.
- I'm out.
- 1210. - Wait, wait. Let me get this.
- Come on!
- 1211. - Okay, I— Fuck!
- 1212. Hi, Catherine. I was just walkin' out—
- 1213. - What?
- Do you know what time it is?
- 1214. Serious? She said that?
- 1215. What'd she say? Come on.
- 1216. - Yo, Catherine, thank you. Thank you.
- Ask him what time it is.
- 1217. - You got the time?
- I'm gonna talk to you tomorrow.
- 1218. - Hey, man, can you get me some food?
- All right.
- 1219. Come on. We gotta go. Come on.
- 1220. I got the part.
- 1221. - Wow!
- I got the part!
- 1222. - That's great, man.
- That's great. That's wonderful.
- 1223. They didn't even want a callback.
- 1224. I can't believe it. That's great.
- 1225. That's so cool. Way to go.
- 1226. - I got a 7:00 call.
- That's great.
- 1227. Come on, let's go. I want to hear
all about it in the car, okay? Come on.
- 1228. - Hey, Clarence.
- 1229. Nothin'.
- 1230. - Forget it.
- All right. Come on.
- 1231. Come on!
- 1232. Hey, get some— get some beer...
- 1233. and some—
- 1234. and some cleaning products.
- 1235. His legacy lives on.
- 1236. That was Bob Henderson with a touchdown.
- 1237. I'm losin' a fuckin' fortune over here.
- 1238. You talkin' to me, you fuckin' wop, you?
- 1239. Fuckin'--
- 1240. You're okay.
- 1241. - Put your jacket on.
- Put your jacket on.
- 1242. - Ready?
- 1243. Put your jacket on. One sleeve at a time.
- 1244. It's a big game now, Elliot.
- 1245. - It's okay. Come on. You all right?
- 1246. Elliot, look at me.
- 1247. Look at me. You comfortable?
- 1248. Am I comfortable? I've got a,
- 1249. like, you know, brick in... my scrotum.
- 1250. That's the best place for it. If they pat you
down, they're not gonna search your balls.
- 1251. - Okay. You think they might see this, perhaps?
- No, it's okay.
- 1252. - When you stand up, it'll be okay. Elliot.
- Okay. Yeah.
- 1253. Elliot, say something.
- 1254. - Just—
- Okay. Hi. How are you?
- 1255. My name's Elliot, and I'm
with the Cub Scouts of America.
- 1256. We're selling uncut cocaine
to get to the jamboree.
- 1257. - Just talk regular.
- Stop fuckin' around.
- 1258. - I can't believe I'm doing this.
- You get that shit?
- 1259. We're gonna be right down the hall,
monitoring you the whole time.
- 1260. What happens if somebody
does something you can't hear,
- 1261. like pulls out a gun and
puts it to my fucking eye?
- 1262. We've done this a thousand times.
- 1263. We know what we're doing,
okay? We're the best.
- 1264. Now, listen. No fuckin' around.
- 1265. Anything happens, we'll be in
there like fuckin' gangbusters.
- 1266. You gotta remember something. You don't
wanna go to jail. Do you wanna go to jail?
- 1267. No, I don't wanna go to jail.
- 1268. So what do we gotta do? We gotta
put your boss in jail, okay?
- 1269. And to do that,
we've got to show in court,
- 1270. beyond a reasonable doubt, that this man,
- 1271. a very respectable man in the Hollywood
community, is also dealing cocaine.
- 1272. We've got to prove it in court,
and you've gotta do it.
- 1273. That's what we're doing here.
- 1274. Okay? You're gonna be okay.
You're not gonna get hurt.
- 1275. So what you've gotta do—
you've gotta get him to admit...
- 1276. on tape, all right?
- 1277. That he's buyin' this coke. Okay, champ?
- 1278. - Get ahold of yourself. You'll be okay.
- 1279. I'm gonna get some coffee.
- 1280. You really got that playin' basketball?
- 1281. Yep, I got elbowed right in the eye.
- 1282. Then, as it that's not enough, I got hurled
the ball right when I'm not lookin'. Wham!
- 1283. - Right in my face.
- You should be careful.
- 1284. I should.
- 1285. Clarence, what the fuck
did you bring that for?
- 1286. - In case.
- In case of what?
- 1287. I don't know. What the
hell do you want me to say?
- 1288. Look, Clarence, Lee Donowitz is not a pimp.
- 1289. I know that. But one thing
this last week has taught me,
- 1290. it's better to have a gun and not need
it than to need a gun and not have it.
- 1291. Paging Mr. Sherek.
- 1292. - Sherek.
- He's over at the bar.
- 1293. There he is.
- 1294. Elliot, your motivation
is to stay out of jail.
- 1295. - Easy, easy, easy.
- 1296. - Hi.
- 1297. I guess it's about that time, huh?
- 1298. Yeah.
- 1299. Here we go.
- 1300. You're an actor. Act, motherfucker.
- 1301. - Elliot?
- 1302. - Get on your knees.
- Oh, no.
- 1303. - What?
- I said, get on your fuckin' knees!
- 1304. Shut the fuck up! I know
what the fuck I'm doin'.
- 1305. - You think I'm pretty fuckin' stupid, don't you?
- 1306. Don't you fuckin' lie
to me, you motherfucker!
- 1307. He's bluffing you,
Elliot! Can't you see that?
- 1308. I want to hear you say,
"Clarence, you are—"
- 1309. Shut up! Say it, goddamn
it! I wanna hear you say it!
- 1310. "Clarence, you are without a doubt,
the dumbest motherfucker I've ever seen!"
- 1311. - Say it!
- Dumb fucker!
- 1312. - Apparently, I'm not as dumb— Shut up!
- He didn't do nothin'!
- 1313. Apparently, I'm not as dumb as
you fuckin' think I am, am I?
- 1314. - No.
- What the fuck is waiting for us up there?
- 1315. - What the fuck's waiting for us?
- He's gonna shoot him.
- 1316. Tell me, or I'm gonna pump
2 in your face right here.
- 1317. He's not gonna shoot him.
- 1318. - Motherfuck—
- He's gonna shoot him.
- 1319. Like Nick Curry used to say, if I'm wrong,
I swear to God I'll fucking apologize!
- 1320. Something's amiss. I can feel it.
If anything out of the ordinary goes down,
- 1321. you are gonna be the first one shot.
- 1322. - He didn't do anything! What the fuck—
- Shut up!
- 1323. I'm gonna blow this
motherfucker away. Fuck you!
- 1324. I wish somebody would
just come and get me,
- 1325. because I don't like this anymore!
- 1326. Get ahold of yourself, you fuckin' sissy!
- 1327. I really wish somebody would just come
and take me away! Just take me away!
- 1328. Hang in there, will you? Goddamn it!
- 1329. I can't take this! I'm sorry,
but I just can't! I wish somebody...
- 1330. would just come to my rescue,
and everything would be all right!
- 1331. Elliot? Elliot?
- 1332. - What?
- I'm sorry, all right?
- 1333. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. Friends?
- 1334. I'm sorry.
- 1335. - What's with this guy?
- Quit playing around.
- 1336. I wasn't playing around.
I just had to be sure.
- 1337. That's all. I'm sure now, okay?
- 1338. I'm sorry. I didn't mean to scare you.
- 1339. Oh, man!
- 1340. I like this Clarence kid.
This fuckin' guy's crazy.
- 1341. Yeah.
- 1342. I got up feelin' so down
- 1343. - Oh, man.
- I got off bein' sold out
- 1344. - Are you Dick Ritchie?
- Uh, no.
- 1345. - But the story's getting old now
- Do you know a Clarence Worley?
- 1346. - Yes.
- Do you know where we can find him?
- 1347. - Yes, I do. Oh.
- I just looked in the mirror
- 1348. Well, where?
- 1349. At the Beverly Ambassador.
- 1350. - Where's that?
- 1351. you go—
- 1352. No. Yeah. Go down—
Go down Beach—
- 1353. You guys want to smoke a bowl or—
- 1354. Oh. Go down Beachwood and drive a while,
- 1355. and then you're gonna turn right, okay?
- 1356. And then you go, and you keep drivin',
and you keep drivin'.
- 1357. - Hello, Elliot.
- 1358. Are these your friends?
- 1359. Yeah. Yeah.
- 1360. You could say that.
Everybody, this is Monty.
- 1361. Hi. Come on in. Lee's in the
can. He'll be out in a quick.
- 1362. Holy shit. Look at this.
Do you believe this?
- 1363. - It's a helicopter.
- Sorry. Nothing personal.
- 1364. Clarence.
- 1365. There ain't gonna be a need to search me.
All you're gonna find is this right here.
- 1366. What compelled you to bring that along?
- 1367. I guess the same thing
that compelled you guys...
- 1368. to bring heavy artillery
to a business meeting.
- 1369. - I'll take that.
- Well, you're gonna have to.
- 1370. Oh, hi.
- 1371. Everybody's here. Elliot, who's who?
- 1372. Uh, that's Dick on the end there.
- 1373. Oh, that's Dick! Elliot
tells me you're quite gifted.
- 1374. And, uh, Alabama in the middle.
- 1375. - Hello.
- Clarence on the end.
- 1376. - Lee, this guy is—
- Boris, please. I'm meeting people right now.
- 1377. - Mr. Donowitz?
- Come on, Clarence. Don't insult me. Call me Lee.
- 1378. - Lee?
- Boris, shut the fuck up.
- 1379. Come on, everybody.
Don't be shy. Come on in.
- 1380. Okay, uh, Lee.
- 1381. - Lee.
- 1382. - That's right, Lee.
- I gotta tell you, I really am a big fan.
- 1383. Coming Home in a Body Bag is
my favorite movie of all time.
- 1384. After Apocalypse Now, I think that
is the best Vietnam movie ever made.
- 1385. - Wow. Thank you very much, Clarence.
- 1386. - What?
- This guy's packin'.
- 1387. Really?
- 1388. Well, I've been pretty
scared about this whole thing.
- 1389. But I'm fairly confident you're just here to
do business. I don't want to be a wise guy.
- 1390. If you want, I'll take my
gun out, lay it on the table.
- 1391. It's up to you.
- 1392. Mm, no, I don't think that's
necessary. Boris, be nice.
- 1393. Make everybody some coffee, okay?
- 1394. - It's a pleasure to meet you.
- Nice to meet you too.
- 1395. Honey, sit down. Relax. Relax.
- 1396. - Elliot, you look like shit.
- Oh, I'm sorry.
- 1397. I mean, it's completely disgusting.
- 1398. Um, I need to get a quick
signature. It would be great—
- 1399. - Whatever Bonnie wants.
- 1400. - Like my dailies there, Clar?
- 1401. - Is that what these are? Yeah, they're great.
- You like 'em?
- 1402. Better fuckin' be great.
They cost me enough.
- 1403. - What'd that day cost me?
- 1404. Elliot, I swear to God,
somebody is stealing from me.
- 1405. What's this one called anyway?
- 1406. - It's a sequel to Body Bag.
- 1407. We don't have a title
yet. What does Joe like?
- 1408. Uh, Body Bags II.
- 1409. Ooh, that's imaginative. I've
got more taste in my penis.
- 1410. This guy's really fuckin' funny.
- 1411. You know, most of these movies that
win a lot of Oscars, I can't stand them.
- 1412. They're all safe, geriatric
- 1413. We park our cars in the
same garage. It's all right.
- 1414. All those assholes make are unwatchable
movies from unreadable books.
- 1415. Mad Max, that's a movie. The Good,
the Bad and the Ugly, that's a movie.
- 1416. Rio Bravo, that's a movie. And Coming Home
in a Body Bag, that was a fuckin' movie.
- 1417. It was the only movie up to that time
that won a lot of Oscars with balls.
- 1418. - I mean, since Deer Hunter.
- I don't believe you.
- 1419. Do you like a little coffee
with your sugar, or what?
- 1420. Lee, I'm not satisfied till
the spoon stands straight up.
- 1421. Give me a coffee, will you?
- 1422. My Uncle Roger and Uncle Jerry, both of whom
were in 'Nam, saw Coming Home in a Body Bag.
- 1423. They said to me, Clarence, that is the most
accurate Vietnam film they'd ever seen.
- 1424. When veterans in that bullshit
war say that about my project,
- 1425. it makes the whole thing worthwhile.
- 1426. Here's to you.
- 1427. My friend— I'm calling you my
friend. I just met you. You know why?
- 1428. I think 'cause we got the same interests.
- 1429. You know what I'd like to do right now?
I'd like to see Dr. Zhivago.
- 1430. Where is it?
- 1431. Is there a fucking doctor
in the house, or what?
- 1432. Hang on a second. Lee, when you
see this, you are gonna shit.
- 1433. - I better.
- 1434. - What's the guy's name?
- 1435. When somebody loves you
- 1436. It's no good unless you love them
- 1437. Uh, Lee, that is all practically uncut.
- 1438. If you so desire, you can
cut that a hell of a lot more.
- 1439. Don't worry. I'll desire. Boris,
get me another cup of coffee, will you?
- 1440. - Me too, Boris.
- I have to hand it to you, this is not nose garbage.
- 1441. It's quality stuff.
- 1442. Perfect merchandise.
- 1443. The only trouble is, whenever I'm
offered a deal that's too good to be true,
- 1444. it's because it's a lie.
- 1445. Jesus, what's going on?
- 1446. - Why don't you convince me you're on the level?
- Convince him.
- 1447. If he don't bite, we ain't
got shit except possession.
- 1448. Boris, we got all kinds of sandwich shit
back there. Make something for somebody.
- 1449. We got lean pastrami, nice
rye. Anybody want anything?
- 1450. - You got any aspirin?
- Yeah, sure. Get him that.
- 1451. Well, uh, Lee, it's like this.
- 1452. You're getting the bargain of a lifetime
because I don't know what the fuck I'm doing.
- 1453. You're used to dealing with professionals,
and I'm not. I'm a rank amateur.
- 1454. What the fuck's goin' on?
What the fuck's goin' on?
- 1455. I can take that and sell it a little
bit at a time. Make a lot more money.
- 1456. - What's going on, Joe?
- Elliot's too far away.
- 1457. - This is the whole ball game. The game is set!
- He's too far away!
- 1458. I'm not a drug dealer. I'm not
saying you're a drug dealer.
- 1459. But you're a movie producer. You got access
to all kinds of money and shit like that.
- 1460. Shit!
- 1461. - Joe, you are fuckin' killing me. Joe—
- Wait, wait. Wait.
- 1462. I cannot get a million for it, but you can.
- 1463. All right? So I'll sell
it to you for 200,000.
- 1464. You go make a million with it.
- 1465. Shit, it's all found money
to me anyway, you know?
- 1466. There he is.
- 1467. Me- Me and my wife,
we're minimum-wage kids.
- 1468. $200,000, that means the world to us.
- 1469. Elliot tells me that you're
fronting for a dirty cop.
- 1470. Uh, Elliot wasn't supposed
to tell you anything.
- 1471. He's not a dirty cop. He's a good cop.
- 1472. He saw his chance, and
he took it, that's all.
- 1473. Why does he trust you?
- 1474. Well, we grew up together, that's why.
- 1475. Clarence, if you don't know shit,
- 1476. then why does he think that you can sell it?
- 1477. I bullshitted him.
- 1478. You are nuts!
- 1479. He's a wild man, this
kid Clarence. I like him.
- 1480. - You're wild! I love you! I love this guy.
- Hey, Lee.
- 1481. He bullshitted him. You
believe this kid? I love him.
- 1482. Elliot, I love this kid.
Monty, get the money.
- 1483. That's it, fellas. Let's
get these sons of bitches.
- 1484. Now, wait, wait.
- 1485. I forgot. Excuse me. What
is your part in this again?
- 1486. - I'm his wife.
- Oh, you're the wife! Right.
- 1487. Clarence, what, did you
beat her or something?
- 1488. No, no. She got that playing basketball.
- 1489. - What's the matter with you?
- I'm sorry.
- 1490. - Why are you here?
- I'm an actor.
- 1491. Dick, if you were just a fuckin' actor,
you never would've got in the room.
- 1492. I'm— I'm friends with Elliot.
- 1493. He's your friend? You got problems.
- 1494. All right, all right. It's
all right. And Elliot knows me.
- 1495. - Elliot, here. Call Joe.
- 1496. Tell that cocksucker the
production manager reports...
- 1497. that he's taking 30 cents of every
dollar and putting it in his own pocket.
- 1498. Don't you want to count your money?
- 1499. No, that's all right. She can count
it. I'm gonna go to the bathroom.
- 1500. Give it to her.
- 1501. Well, since my baby left me
- 1502. I found a new place to dwell
- 1503. It's down at the end of Lonely Street
- 1504. The Heartbreak Hotel
- 1505. - I gotta hand it to you, Clarence.
- I was cool?
- 1506. Man, you were cooler than cool.
- 1507. Oh, my God. I forgot my fuckin' vest.
- 1508. - Stupid.
- Cody, on 3.
- 1509. - Yeah.
- 1, 2, 3
- 1510. Both of you, put the fucking
guns on the floor now!
- 1511. Fuck you! All you pigs, put your
guns on the floor and back away.
- 1512. - Are you fucking nuts? Just do what they say.
- This is your last chance!
- 1513. Fuck you! This is your last chance!
We could kill all of you and you know it!
- 1514. - Get down on the fucking floor!
- Boris, shut the fuck up.
- 1515. - We're all gonna die here. These are cops.
- So? Who gives a shit?
- 1516. Something I never told you
about me. I hate fucking cops!
- 1517. Let's be nice, guys. Come on.
Let's be nice. We don't want to die.
- 1518. We don't want any of you guys to die.
- 1519. You look like a blond Frankenstein.
Now put your gun down!
- 1520. - 211?
- Yeah, 211.
- 1521. There you go, Mad Dog.
- 1522. - Holy shit. Motherfucker.
- What the fuck is goin' on?
- 1523. - Who are these guys? Put 'em down!
- Put your fuckin' guns down!
- 1524. Put 'em down, motherfucker! Put 'em down!
- 1525. Fuck you!
- 1526. Put those fuckin' guns down!
- 1527. How you really think
I'm doin' with Lee, huh?
- 1528. - You kidding? He loves you.
- You don't think I'm kissing his ass or anything, do you?
- 1529. You're telling him what he wants to hear.
That ain't the same thing as kissing his ass.
- 1530. Yeah, I saw Coming Home in a Body Bag.
I loved it. I'm not lyin' to the guy.
- 1531. No. That's why it ain't ass-kissin'.
- 1532. What you're doin' is
genuine, and he knows it.
- 1533. I like you, Clarence.
- 1534. Always have. Always will.
- 1535. Put 'em down! Put 'em down, motherfuckers!
- 1536. Officer Dimes. Officer Dimes.
- 1537. Put 'em down, motherfucker!
Put 'em down!
- 1538. - Officer Dimes?
- 1539. - Officer Dimes? Officer Dimes?
- 1540. Um, this has nothing to
do with me anymore, right?
- 1541. Okay? So I'm just gonna leave,
- 1542. and you guys just settle
this by yourselves, all right?
- 1543. Just shut up and stay the fuck put, Elliot.
- 1544. How do you know his name?
- 1545. Why the fuck did he know your name?
- 1546. You little piece of shit!
- 1547. You can forget about acting for the next
20 years! Your fuckin' career is over!
- 1548. Take you fuckin' SAG card and burn it!
- 1549. You little cocksucker!
- 1550. I treated you like a son,
and you fuckin' stab me in the heart!
- 1551. Fuck you! Fuck you! Fuck you!
- 1552. Mother— Watch it, motherfucker!
- 1553. Cody!
- 1554. Son of a—
- 1555. Clarence!
- 1556. Sweetie! Sweetie!
- 1557. Baby!
- 1558. Okay, you with the shotgun
behind the couch, come out!
- 1559. Guy's a wop.
- 1560. I said come out from behind the
couch, you fuckin' guinea, now!
- 1561. I said-a come out from-a behind
the couch-o, okay? Capisce?
- 1562. Nice and slow.
- 1563. Shit! The guy hit me.
- 1564. Son of a bitch shot me.
- 1565. Sweetie!
- 1566. Don't you die on me!
- 1567. You're gonna be okay.
- 1568. I need an ambulance!
- 1569. I need an ambulance!
- 1570. Fuck you!
- 1571. I'll blow this bitch's brains
to kingdom come!
- 1572. I need an ambulance!
- 1573. Shut up!
- 1574. Fuck you! I'm bleeding!
- 1575. I'll call you a hearse.
- 1576. This is for Cody.
- 1577. Fuck you!
- 1578. Honey, you're alive!
- 1579. Honey!
- 1580. I can't see.
- 1581. Honey, you have blood in your eye.
- 1582. Come on.
- 1583. All right. Okay.
- 1584. Fuck you!
- 1585. I want a car to take me to the
airport and a plane full of gas!
- 1586. And a million bucks!
Small bills! And—
- 1587. Get outta my face, motherfucker!
- 1588. Amid the chaos of that day,
- 1589. when all I could hear was
the thunder of gunshots...
- 1590. and all I could smell was
the violence in the air,
- 1591. I look back and am amazed...
- 1592. that my thoughts were
so clear and true—
- 1593. that 3 words went through my mind endlessly,
- 1594. repeating themselves like a broken record.
- 1595. "You're so cool. You're so cool.
- 1596. You're so cool."
- 1597. And sometimes Clarence asks me what
I would have done if he had died,
- 1598. if that bullet had been
2 inches more to the left.
- 1599. To this, I always smile...
- 1600. as if I'm not going to
satisfy him with a response.
- 1601. But I always do.
- 1602. I tell him of how I would want to die,
- 1603. but that the anguish and the want of
death would fade like the stars at dawn...
- 1604. and that things would be
much as they are now, perhaps.
- 1605. Except maybe I wouldn't
have named our son...
- 1606. Elvis.
- 1607. No stars in the sky
- 1608. The night seems so dark around you
- 1609. You won't say a word
- 1610. And wonder why no one's found you
- 1611. Waiting for love
- 1612. Praying for love again
- 1613. Love's a heavy weight
- 1614. Give it to me Don't hesitate
- 1615. Love's a heavy thing
- 1616. Too heavy for one heart
- 1617. To bring me your love
- 1618. Give me your love again
- 1619. It's not your fault
- 1620. One heart can never win
- 1621. It takes 2 hearts
- 1622. 2 hearts just to hold love
- 1623. 2 hearts
- 1624. 2 hearts just to hold your love
- 1625. Your love
- 1626. And if your heart should ache
- 1627. Remember me
- 1628. And if your heart should break
- 1629. 2 hearts
- 1630. 2 hearts They can mend it
- 1631. Heartache
- 1632. Heartaches can be mended by love
- 1633. By love
- 1634. Love's a heavy weight
- 1635. Give it to me Don't hesitate
- 1636. Love's a heavy thing
- 1637. Too heavy for one heart
- 1638. To bring me your love
- 1639. Give me your love again
- 1640. It's not too late
- 1641. One heart can never win
- 1642. It takes 2 hearts
- 1643. 2 hearts just to hold love
- 1644. 2 hearts
- 1645. 2 hearts just to hold your love
- 1646. Your love