1. Go get them, Petey!Copy !req
2. Petey! What's up, pup?Copy !req
3. Get it, Stymie, get it!Copy !req
4. - Hey, man, where's your mitt?
- Don't worry about it.Copy !req
5. All right! Good catch!Copy !req
6. Hello, Petey.Copy !req
7. Be back later, Mom.Copy !req
8. - Got anything, Porky?
- Not a bite, Buckwheat.Copy !req
9. Hmm.Copy !req
10. - I got something! I got something!
- Me too! A big fat one!Copy !req
11. Whoa!Copy !req
12. Whoa!Copy !req
13. Whoa!Copy !req
14. Yo, Petey, come here!Copy !req
15. - Thanks, Petey!
- Whoa!Copy !req
16. Hey Porky, look! A note.Copy !req
17. What's it say?Copy !req
18. We got to learn to read.Copy !req
19. You okay?Copy !req
20. You're okay.
You're all right.Copy !req
21. Go on in. You're okay.Copy !req
22. Go on in.
What's the "Hi" sign?Copy !req
23. Go on in.Copy !req
24. You're okay.
Wrong sign, Porky.Copy !req
25. Okay, go on in.Copy !req
26. You're okay, Elmer.Copy !req
27. You little creep.Copy !req
28. Sit down.Copy !req
29. Gentlemen and gentlemen, I give
you our president, Spanky.Copy !req
30. Hi, Spanky!Copy !req
31. How's it going, Spanky?Copy !req
32. Nice to see ya, Spanky.Copy !req
33. - Hey, Spanky, what's up?
- How are ya?Copy !req
34. Good to see ya.Copy !req
35. Your fly's undone.Copy !req
36. - Welcome!
- All right, Spanky!Copy !req
37. - Hey, Spanky!
- All raise your right hand.Copy !req
38. Your other right hand.Copy !req
39. - I...
- I...Copy !req
40. - Stymie...
- Stymie...Copy !req
41. member in good standing of the
He-Man Woman-Haters Club...Copy !req
42. member in good standing of the
He-Man Woman-Haters Club...Copy !req
43. do solemnly swear to be a He-Man and
hate women and not play with them,Copy !req
44. or talk to them unless I have to,
and especially never fall in love.Copy !req
45. And if I do, may I die slowly and
painfully and suffer for hours,Copy !req
46. or until I scream bloody murder.Copy !req
47. do solemnly swear to be a He-Man...Copy !req
48. - You thinkin' what I'm thinkin', Woim?
- Yeah, Butch.Copy !req
49. What are we thinkin'?Copy !req
50. How much fun it's gonna be to
stomp those guys in the race.Copy !req
51. Painfully, and suffer for hours,Copy !req
52. bloody murder!Copy !req
53. - Ready to take down the minutes, Uh-Huh?
- Uh-huh.Copy !req
54. As you know, today I called
an emergency meeting,Copy !req
55. for a very important reason.Copy !req
56. But first, any good stories?Copy !req
57. - Me!
- Buckwheat.Copy !req
58. Yeah! This morning my sister
left the toilet seat down.Copy !req
59. - Women make men miserable.
- Froggy.Copy !req
60. Yeah, there's this girl who
moved in across the street,Copy !req
61. and she came over 'cause
she wanted to play.Copy !req
62. - But don't worry, I got back at her.
- What'd you do?Copy !req
63. - What'd you do?
- I whipped out my lizard.Copy !req
64. Humph!Copy !req
65. Yeah!Copy !req
66. Good job, Frogman.Copy !req
67. - Are you gettin' this, Uh-Huh?
- Uh-huh.Copy !req
68. All right, men, let's talk
about the pride of our club,Copy !req
69. the Blur.Copy !req
70. The Blur has never been beaten,Copy !req
71. since the beginning of time,
five years.Copy !req
72. This Sunday, we defend our honor,Copy !req
73. - our undefeated streak and our trophy.
- Yeah.Copy !req
74. Best of all, this year's trophy,Copy !req
75. will be presented by
none other than the famous,Copy !req
76. Indy race car driver,Copy !req
77. A.J. Ferguson.Copy !req
78. Wow! He's the best driver
in the whole world!Copy !req
79. - Men, can I have an "Azuga"?
- Azuga!Copy !req
80. Azuga! Azuga! Azuga! Azuga!Copy !req
81. - Hey, nice Azugas.
- Yeah.Copy !req
82. And now the reason
for the emergency meeting,Copy !req
83. the choosing of the driver!Copy !req
84. Yeah!Copy !req
85. Our driver should be
a man who's all He-Man.Copy !req
86. A He-Man so manly,Copy !req
87. that if he fell off a building,Copy !req
88. he'd go out of his way
to land on a girl.Copy !req
89. Gentlemen, this year,Copy !req
90. our driver's name is,Copy !req
91. none other than my lifelong chum,Copy !req
92. my best buddy
in the whole wide world,Copy !req
93. the one and only Alfalfa!Copy !req
94. - Yeah!
- Otay!Copy !req
95. Say, where the heck is Alfalfa?Copy !req
96. You are so beautifulCopy !req
97. to meCopy !req
98. Can't you seeCopy !req
99. You're everything I hoped forCopy !req
100. You're everything I needCopy !req
101. You are so beautifulCopy !req
102. to meCopy !req
103. There he is, you guys! Come on!Copy !req
104. He's with a girl.Copy !req
105. Quiet, Petey.Copy !req
106. - They're together.
- Oh, no!Copy !req
107. This is awful.Copy !req
108. Buckwheat, hand me
your fishin' pole.Copy !req
109. Oh, Darla, we're two hearts
with but one beat.Copy !req
110. Two brains with but one thought.Copy !req
111. Two souls with but one...Copy !req
112. shoe.Copy !req
113. Then how can you belong to
that silly Woman Haters Club?Copy !req
114. You know, I'm a woman.Copy !req
115. - Sort of.
- Let me tell you something, Darla.Copy !req
116. I'm not like those guys.Copy !req
117. I'm a sensitive male.Copy !req
118. I'm into sharing, caring,Copy !req
119. feeling and healing.Copy !req
120. - I'm in touch with my feminine side.
- How nice.Copy !req
121. It's worse than I thought.Copy !req
122. You know Alfalfa, the big talent
show at the fair is coming up,Copy !req
123. and I was sort of wondering if
maybe you'd like to sing with me.Copy !req
124. You mean it? I'd be honored.Copy !req
125. Hey, I've got an idea. Let me
take you on a picnic tomorrow.Copy !req
126. - Excuse me?
- The way you feed my soul,Copy !req
127. I can...Copy !req
128. feed your face.Copy !req
129. Cool! And to prove
you're proud of me,Copy !req
130. why don't we have our
picnic in your clubhouse?Copy !req
131. No!Copy !req
132. Tomorrow? Tomorrow?Copy !req
133. Swimming day. Sure!Copy !req
134. Oh, Alfalfa, you're a sweetie poo!Copy !req
135. - All right, Woim, ready for the test run?
- Ready, Butch!Copy !req
136. Look! There goes our bumper!Copy !req
137. All this work for nothing.Copy !req
138. Everything's working out perfectly.Copy !req
139. The guys are at the swimming hole,Copy !req
140. and I'm at home with a toothache.Copy !req
141. Nothing can possibly go wrong.Copy !req
142. - Hiya, Butch.
- Shut up!Copy !req
143. When's the last time
we beat you up?Copy !req
144. Let's see. Today's the 10th.Copy !req
145. Thirty days has September,
April, June and November.Copy !req
146. It's not a leap year.Copy !req
147. - Yesterday.
- You're due!Copy !req
148. Look!Copy !req
149. - I don't see nothing!
- Come on, you doink!Copy !req
150. Let's go! He can't run very fast.Copy !req
151. - Come back here, you ugly little squid!
- No!Copy !req
152. Oh! Oh! Oh!Copy !req
153. Oh! Whoa! Whoa!Copy !req
154. Whoa!Copy !req
155. I've come a-courtin'.Copy !req
156. These are for you.Copy !req
157. Fifi!Copy !req
158. Good doggie.Copy !req
159. I hope Fifi didn't startle
you, she's so playful.Copy !req
160. Forgive my effrontery,Copy !req
161. but you, miss, are a rare rose
in a garden of weeds.Copy !req
162. You have the sophistication
of a woman of 12.Copy !req
163. My name is Waldo Aloysius Johnston IIICopy !req
164. - I'm Alfalfa!
- Yes, I'm sure you are.Copy !req
165. - And I'm Darla.
- We just moved into town.Copy !req
166. My father bought the oil refinery.Copy !req
167. - That explains why you're so refined.
- Yeah, and so oily!Copy !req
168. Watch it, bud.Copy !req
169. I hope to see you again soon.Copy !req
170. That could be arranged. I'll be
appearing in the talent show coming up.Copy !req
171. Yeah, the two of us,Copy !req
172. we'll both be singing
a duet, together.Copy !req
173. - How redundant.
- Thank you.Copy !req
174. Well, I shall be going now.Copy !req
175. Whoa!Copy !req
176. What a hunk!Copy !req
177. He's smoother than a baby's bottom.Copy !req
178. And he smells better too!Copy !req
179. Oh, you're so nice
for bringing me here.Copy !req
180. - I can't see, I can't see.
- Move over.Copy !req
181. A candlelit lunch! I'm dazzled.Copy !req
182. Excuse me.Copy !req
183. I seem to have a little fahrvergnugen.Copy !req
184. No problem.Copy !req
185. - Grape soda?
- Yes, please.Copy !req
186. To us.Copy !req
187. This tastes like somebody
poured it through a old boot.Copy !req
188. Actually, it's a sneaker.Copy !req
189. Must have been a bad year.Copy !req
190. Maybe we should
strap on the old feed bag.Copy !req
191. - Which sandwich did I bring?
- This one.Copy !req
192. Why don't we swap?
What's yours is mine,Copy !req
193. what's mine is ours.Copy !req
194. You know just what to say
to take a girl's breath away.Copy !req
195. This'll take her breath away.Copy !req
196. Porky, you sure know
how to make a "sand... wich."Copy !req
197. That wasn't sand,
that was kitty litter.Copy !req
198. Don't worry, it's pretty fresh.Copy !req
199. - You made a delicious sandwich.
- So did you.Copy !req
200. Very crunchy.Copy !req
201. Maybe we should move on to dessert.Copy !req
202. It's a surprise.Copy !req
203. It's beautiful!Copy !req
204. I had to eat six boxes
of Cracker Jacks to find it.Copy !req
205. It's a symbol of
my undying affliction for you.Copy !req
206. I love diamonds!Copy !req
207. I was wrong about you, Alfalfa.Copy !req
208. You're not embarrassed
by the woman you love.Copy !req
209. Darla,Copy !req
210. would you think me forward
if I asked you for a...Copy !req
211. a big wet one?Copy !req
212. - What?
- A kiss?Copy !req
213. Okay.Copy !req
214. Oh, man! Gross!Copy !req
215. I can't take it anymore.
Get outta there!Copy !req
216. Open up!Copy !req
217. - Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa!
- Why, thank you, Alfalfa.Copy !req
218. Open up!Copy !req
219. In my hurry to eat,
I forgot to give you the tour.Copy !req
220. Here's the wall,
here's the other wall and...Copy !req
221. here's our closet.Copy !req
222. - Have you lost your mind?
- Do you wanna go in there?Copy !req
223. - Just as I thought, you are ashamed of me.
- I'm not ashamed of you.Copy !req
224. - I'm proud of you.
- Open up!Copy !req
225. I just don't want anybody
to see you.Copy !req
226. - Well, that does it, mister. I'm out of here!
- One, two,Copy !req
227. three!Copy !req
228. It's about time.Copy !req
229. Hiya, guys! You're back early.Copy !req
230. How's the toothache, bub?Copy !req
231. - Yeah!
- Dentist pulled my wisdom teeth.Copy !req
232. So that explains why
you're acting so stupid.Copy !req
233. Well, we're going
inside the clubhouse...Copy !req
234. No, you're not! It's such a
nice day outside, isn't it?Copy !req
235. Nothing's going on in there.Copy !req
236. - Hey, what's that noise?
- Whoa!Copy !req
237. Darla!Copy !req
238. - What's the matter?
- Fire! Fire!Copy !req
239. - You two, call the fire department.
- Yes, sir!Copy !req
240. Ready, fire!Copy !req
241. We're gonna need some more help.
Get more people.Copy !req
242. Fire!Copy !req
243. Put some more in the bucket.Copy !req
244. Quick! What's the number for 911?Copy !req
245. How do I know?Copy !req
246. Let's go!Copy !req
247. If you'd like to make a call,
please hang up and try again.Copy !req
248. Here's the hose.
Turn it on when I tell you.Copy !req
249. Spanky, over here!Copy !req
250. Go! Go! Go!Copy !req
251. Go! Faster! Go even faster!Copy !req
252. Wow! That is fast.Copy !req
253. Hey, beat it, pal!Copy !req
254. Stymie, let 'er rip!Copy !req
255. Whoa!Copy !req
256. - Wow!
- Whoa!Copy !req
257. Whoa!Copy !req
258. Whoa!Copy !req
259. I'm never going to speak
to you as long as I live.Copy !req
260. Tell him when he comes to, guys.Copy !req
261. Goodbye! Excuse me!Copy !req
262. Hi, Darla. I thought that was you.Copy !req
263. - Bye!
- How about a ride in my father's Bentley?Copy !req
264. And then, over a Belgian croissant,Copy !req
265. we might talk about performing
in the talent show together.Copy !req
266. Sounds great!
I had a hard day.Copy !req
267. The clubhouse is fried crispy.Copy !req
268. Our lives are over.Copy !req
269. And it's all your fault!Copy !req
270. - That's right.
- It sure is.Copy !req
271. All rise for Judge Spanky.Copy !req
272. - I think Spanky's going to find him guilty.
- Big time.Copy !req
273. - How do you plead?
- Like this.Copy !req
274. Please, oh, please,
have mercy, please!Copy !req
275. Hmm! Pretty good pleading.Copy !req
276. Would you like to make a statement?Copy !req
277. Just that,Copy !req
278. I never knew likin' a girl
could lead to all this.Copy !req
279. I let my pals down,
I let the club down,Copy !req
280. and I let my best friend down.Copy !req
281. Alfalfa Switzer,
I hereby sentence youCopy !req
282. to execution... at dawn!Copy !req
283. - Yes!
- Uh-huh!Copy !req
284. Your Honor, may I suggest, this
court rules he be put on probation.Copy !req
285. As terms of the probation,Copy !req
286. he alone will be responsible
for guarding the go-cart.Copy !req
287. Day and night.Copy !req
288. - Court agrees.
- Yeah.Copy !req
289. Do you mean you want me
to spend the night here?Copy !req
290. All alone? Out in the open?Copy !req
291. What about the wild dingoes?Copy !req
292. - Too bad.
- Deal with it.Copy !req
293. As another term of his probation,Copy !req
294. that he may never again talk to, see
or even think about Darla, or else...Copy !req
295. Yeah!Copy !req
296. And I'm makin' it my own personal
business to see that you don't.Copy !req
297. Yeah! All right!Copy !req
298. Oh!Copy !req
299. You are so beautiful to me.Copy !req
300. I love you, Alfalfa.Copy !req
301. I want to die in your arms.Copy !req
302. - You do?
- Of course, not right away.Copy !req
303. - March! March!
- I'm off to join Sir Spankus.Copy !req
304. How's the toothache, bub?Copy !req
305. But you're my boy-toy!
I won't let you go!Copy !req
306. You must choose between us.Copy !req
307. - Yeah, you must choose between us.
- Sir Alfalfa, haul butt!Copy !req
308. Maybe this will help you
make up your mind.Copy !req
309. - Tell me you'll never leave me.
- I'll never leave you.Copy !req
310. That's it, traitor! We must slay
you before your forbidden loveCopy !req
311. destroys our manly bond.Copy !req
312. Choose or die! Choose or die!Copy !req
313. Choose or die! Choose or die!Copy !req
314. Ease up, pal. It's just us.Copy !req
315. - We came to keep you company.
- Yeah.Copy !req
316. Yeah.Copy !req
317. Well, why am I soaking wet?Copy !req
318. Don't worry, Alfalfa. I used
to have the same problem.Copy !req
319. There's just a hole in the tent.Copy !req
320. You're not thinking
about Darla, are ya?Copy !req
321. - No, of course not.
- Good!Copy !req
322. I wonder if she's
not thinking of me too.Copy !req
323. Why are boys such jerks?Copy !req
324. You're not thinking
about Alfalfa, are you?Copy !req
325. Oh, no, no, no, no way!Copy !req
326. Are you sure?Copy !req
327. Babes are like a bad song.Copy !req
328. Once you get them stuck in your
head, you can't get them out again.Copy !req
329. Yeah, that's right.Copy !req
330. - Why do they have to be so...
- Different?Copy !req
331. Girls get along with each other.Copy !req
332. Boys stand up for themselves.Copy !req
333. - Girls care.
- Boys take what's theirs.Copy !req
334. Boys won't listen.Copy !req
335. All they wanna do is talk.Copy !req
336. - They like to moon ya.
- No, we don't!Copy !req
337. - Gigglin' and gossipin'.
- Fighting and farting!Copy !req
338. - Barbie's and bracelets.
- Boogers and bugs!Copy !req
339. - Ice skating.
- Bungee jumping.Copy !req
340. Synchronized swimming.Copy !req
341. And try to get 'em to sit still.Copy !req
342. Boys...Copy !req
343. Girls...Copy !req
344. And the worst thing of all...Copy !req
345. - They smell...
- Weird!Copy !req
346. Howdy, mister.Copy !req
347. Me and my buddies
have to build a new clubhouse.Copy !req
348. We need to buy some lumber.Copy !req
349. - What kind?
- Wood!Copy !req
350. We took up a collection.Copy !req
351. Get us all the wood you can
for this much, please.Copy !req
352. Paper or plastic?Copy !req
353. $450 for lumber?Copy !req
354. Where are we gonna get
that kind of moola?Copy !req
355. I don't know. You know what they say,Copy !req
356. wood doesn't grow on trees.Copy !req
357. Hey, you guys, come here!Copy !req
358. All in favor say,
"Yoy, yoy, yoy, yoy, yoy!"Copy !req
359. Yoy, yoy, yoy, yoy...Copy !req
360. Thank you, my good man.Copy !req
361. Six kids, hardworking father,
honest and trustworthy.Copy !req
362. Loan denied.Copy !req
363. Hello, my good man.Copy !req
364. Gentlemen, have a seat.Copy !req
365. - Can we sit down?
- Are you kidding?Copy !req
366. We can't sit down, my good man.Copy !req
367. - What may I do for you?
- We want to take out a hefty loan.Copy !req
368. Of course, of course. Do you
have an account with us?Copy !req
369. And how!Copy !req
370. And what is your account...Copy !req
371. - number?
- Seven.Copy !req
372. Seven?Copy !req
373. Seven...?Copy !req
374. - Try eight?
- Eight?Copy !req
375. Heard enough.Copy !req
376. Ouch!Copy !req
377. If you were my kids,
I'd punish you!Copy !req
378. If we were your kids,
we'd punish ourselves!Copy !req
379. Leave the premises posthaste!Copy !req
380. You can't treat people
this way, mister.Copy !req
381. You're not people.
You're kids.Copy !req
382. - Thank you.
- Good luck.Copy !req
383. She loves me.
She loves me not.Copy !req
384. She loves me.
She loves me not.Copy !req
385. She loves me!Copy !req
386. You guys don't know
what you're talking about.Copy !req
387. I have to see her!Copy !req
388. But that's a violation
of your probation.Copy !req
389. I know! I'll write a message,
and you two can take it to her.Copy !req
390. Wait a second!
We're He-Man Woman Haters.Copy !req
391. We can't deliver love notes.Copy !req
392. Love note? No!
This is gonna be a hate note.Copy !req
393. - Sounds good to me!
- Sounds good to me!Copy !req
394. Dear Darla,
I hate your stinkin' guts!Copy !req
395. You make me vomit.Copy !req
396. You're scum between my toes.Copy !req
397. Love, Alfalfa.Copy !req
398. Otay!Copy !req
399. What's up, guys?Copy !req
400. Buckwheat, where's the note?Copy !req
401. Note, note.Copy !req
402. I know I got it here somewhere.Copy !req
403. - Come on, guys.
- We'll find it.Copy !req
404. I'm waiting.Copy !req
405. I know! I gave it to you.Copy !req
406. Uh-oh!Copy !req
407. - What's going on?
- Sorry.Copy !req
408. It's otay. I remember what it said.Copy !req
409. "Dear Darla,Copy !req
410. "I hate your stinking guts.Copy !req
411. "You make me vomit.Copy !req
412. "You are scum between my toes.Copy !req
413. "Love, Alfalfa."Copy !req
414. Whoa!Copy !req
415. Well, yeah... but was she upset?Copy !req
416. Mmm-hmm, mmm-hmm.
Mmm-hmm, mmm-hmm.Copy !req
417. Oh! I have to go to her house
and explain what happened.Copy !req
418. Forget it, pal!Copy !req
419. Number one, she's not home
'cause she has a ballet recital.Copy !req
420. Number two...
What was number two?Copy !req
421. No! Not that!
The other number two.Copy !req
422. Spanky said
you couldn't talk to her.Copy !req
423. What? I can talk
to Darla any time I want.Copy !req
424. Spanky's not the boss of me!Copy !req
425. Hiya, pal!Copy !req
426. Oh, no!Copy !req
427. Trust me, this is
for your own good.Copy !req
428. After you dump her,
you'll feel like a new man.Copy !req
429. But, I like the feel
of the old man.Copy !req
430. Hello. Hello, enjoy the show.Copy !req
431. Who are you with?Copy !req
432. I'm with him,
and we need to talk to Darla.Copy !req
433. I'm afraid that's out of the
question, she's about to go onstage.Copy !req
434. Now clear the door. Go on.Copy !req
435. Too bad. Well, let's go!Copy !req
436. Hold it, partner. We're waiting
right here till Darla comes out.Copy !req
437. Oh, man!Copy !req
438. Whoops!Copy !req
439. This'll be like stealing candy
from a baby.Copy !req
440. Oh, boy.Copy !req
441. Come on.Copy !req
442. Hey, look! A dollar!Copy !req
443. Ducky, ducky!Copy !req
444. Yoo-hoo, Mister Ducky,
ducky! Ducky!Copy !req
445. Ducky! Ducky, ducky!Copy !req
446. Ducky! Come here, ducky!Copy !req
447. - Ducky!
- Nothing beats a buck and a duck.Copy !req
448. Hey, you dumb duck, wait up!Copy !req
449. What's this?Copy !req
450. We got a dollar, we got a dollarCopy !req
451. We got a dollar.
Hey, hey, hey, heyCopy !req
452. We got a dollar, we got a dollarCopy !req
453. We got a dollar.
Hey, hey, hey, heyCopy !req
454. I'm bored.Copy !req
455. Ta-da!Copy !req
456. Gee, thanks!Copy !req
457. Butch and Woim! Put that thing
in your pocket and let's bail!Copy !req
458. Hey, there they are.Copy !req
459. Whoops!Copy !req
460. Whoops!Copy !req
461. Let's go!Copy !req
462. Whoops!Copy !req
463. Whoops!Copy !req
464. Shh...Copy !req
465. Hiya, big boys!Copy !req
466. Woof, woof!Copy !req
467. - Ditto!
- Say,Copy !req
468. you two chicklets see a couple
of ugly mugs who ran in here?Copy !req
469. You mean, besides you?Copy !req
470. I think they went in there.Copy !req
471. Thanks, doll face.Copy !req
472. Bye.Copy !req
473. One, two, three!Copy !req
474. What are you doing?Copy !req
475. You two do not belong here.Copy !req
476. I shall escort you to the door.Copy !req
477. Stop this! Please,
you're hurting me!Copy !req
478. - Let go of me!
- This tutu's killing me.Copy !req
479. You took the words
right out of my mouth.Copy !req
480. - Hi.
- Hi!Copy !req
481. Are you a fairy?Copy !req
482. - No!
- Uh-uh!Copy !req
483. - You know, a Sugar Plum Fairy.
- Oh, well, yes, of course.Copy !req
484. - What's the matter?
- Oh, she must have a frog in her throat.Copy !req
485. I'm so nervous I'm sweating like a pig.Copy !req
486. It must be... the recital.Copy !req
487. Come here.Copy !req
488. - Here's my hanky.
- Gee, thanks!Copy !req
489. No, that's all right. You keep it.Copy !req
490. I'm nervous too.
Waldo's gonna be here.Copy !req
491. Waldo's Darla's boyfriend.Copy !req
492. - Do you have boyfriends?
- No!Copy !req
493. No, no, of course not.Copy !req
494. But there is one boy I'd
really love to get to know.Copy !req
495. His name is Alfalfa.Copy !req
496. - What a physique!
- Are you crazy?Copy !req
497. I used to know Alfalfa. He took
the best years of my life.Copy !req
498. Same here! That ugly scud
led me on as if he cared,Copy !req
499. then dropped me like a hot tamale.Copy !req
500. Plus, you know what?Copy !req
501. - No, what?
- I hear he dresses in girl's clothes.Copy !req
502. I don't miss him at all, except...Copy !req
503. his voice.Copy !req
504. When he sings, he makes me melt like
a Popsicle on the Fourth of July.Copy !req
505. He is awfully romantical.Copy !req
506. Well, it was lovely chatting,
but we really gotta go.Copy !req
507. Bye!Copy !req
508. All right, girls, it's time
to take your positions!Copy !req
509. It's show time!Copy !req
510. Come on now, girls.Copy !req
511. Hey Spanky, what are we doing?Copy !req
512. And now scenes from The Nutcracker.Copy !req
513. And two and three.Copy !req
514. Get rid of it.Copy !req
515. - Come here, hold my hand.
- Are you nuts?Copy !req
516. Get off!Copy !req
517. Get!Copy !req
518. Oh!Copy !req
519. Let's get outta here!Copy !req
520. Good thing
I finally caught that frog.Copy !req
521. Yeah, now all you got
to worry about is warts.Copy !req
522. Whoo!Copy !req
523. You ruined
my recital! Where's... Oh!Copy !req
524. Come on out of there, young lady.Copy !req
525. I wouldn't open that, if I was you.Copy !req
526. Oh!Copy !req
527. Well, this is a professional
school of ballet.Copy !req
528. Now get out and do not come back.Copy !req
529. I'll distract them
while you make a getaway.Copy !req
530. - Thanks, Spanky. You sure are a pal.
- Think nothin' of it.Copy !req
531. Hello again, you stud muffins.
Going my way?Copy !req
532. Gee, we'd love to,
but we're waiting around,Copy !req
533. to beat the shorts
off a couple of twerps.Copy !req
534. Your loss, baby.Copy !req
535. Got a burger to go with that shake?Copy !req
536. Aaah!Copy !req
537. That's him!Copy !req
538. Come back here,
you ugly little freak!Copy !req
539. And stay out!Copy !req
540. Things couldn't possibly
get any worse.Copy !req
541. Oh! Then the clouds
opened up and God said,Copy !req
542. "I hate you, Alfalfa."Copy !req
543. Nice tan. Any last words?Copy !req
544. Yeah. Uh, see ya!Copy !req
545. Hey!Copy !req
546. No, you don't!Copy !req
547. I'll let myself out.
Thank you.Copy !req
548. Well, you'd better.Copy !req
549. He lucked out!Copy !req
550. Alfalfa!Copy !req
551. This is a side of you
I've never seen before.Copy !req
552. Darla!Copy !req
553. Darla, there's a perfectly
logical explanation for this.Copy !req
554. Which I'll make up later.Copy !req
555. - Do you like pickles?
- I think they stink.Copy !req
556. I love pickles.Copy !req
557. - My mother makes me eat 'em.
- I'm crazy about 'em.Copy !req
558. I'll sell you my pickle for a nickel.Copy !req
559. How about two cents?Copy !req
560. Otay.Copy !req
561. I have two pickles,
I have two picklesCopy !req
562. I have two pickles today Hey, heyCopy !req
563. Because I get two pickles todayCopy !req
564. TodayCopy !req
565. - Rough day?
- Don't ask.Copy !req
566. Are these kosher?Copy !req
567. We are He-Man Woman Haters.Copy !req
568. We feed girls to alligators.Copy !req
569. The clubhouse
burned down mighty low.Copy !req
570. But we got a plan
to make some dough.Copy !req
571. Left, right, left, right.Copy !req
572. Looking good. This is
gonna be a piece of cake.Copy !req
573. Spanky, me and Porky got an idea.Copy !req
574. Keep it. You might need
it when you grow up.Copy !req
575. Otay.Copy !req
576. Hey, maybe this will work.Copy !req
577. Let's go.Copy !req
578. Ladies and gentlemen!
Boys and girls!Copy !req
579. Enter if you dare!
See the weird freak of nature!Copy !req
580. - Even science can't explain it!
- It's a really good show!Copy !req
581. Step right up and witness
this hideous mutant!Copy !req
582. - Amazing! Incredible!
- Come on, everybody!Copy !req
583. Four foot man-eating chicken!Copy !req
584. Hey folks, we need
to make some money!Copy !req
585. Give me a quarter!
Five dollars! Anything!Copy !req
586. We need to build a new clubhouse!Copy !req
587. Just hurry, hurry, hurry!Copy !req
588. People, people!
We need your money!Copy !req
589. You there, kid!
Wanna come in?Copy !req
590. At least people are ridin' the rides.Copy !req
591. Please go in.Copy !req
592. I will not think of Darla.Copy !req
593. I will not think of Darla!Copy !req
594. I will not think of Darla.Copy !req
595. Maybe Spanky's right.Copy !req
596. Maybe I should
just forget about love.Copy !req
597. Dang, I'm outta paper.Copy !req
598. No, not that kind of paper!Copy !req
599. Thanks, Petey.Copy !req
600. Skunked by that sleazy
sidewinder Spanky!Copy !req
601. It's his fault Darla hates me!Copy !req
602. Hop in, Petey! Sit!Copy !req
603. Come on, Spanky. So things
didn't quite pan out.Copy !req
604. "Didn't quite pan out"? We have
less money than when we came!Copy !req
605. I thought the talent show
was supposed to be free.Copy !req
606. - Look at all that money!
- What's goin' on?Copy !req
607. We just put up the sign and
people started paying us.Copy !req
608. Buckwheat, Porky, you're geniuses.Copy !req
609. Thanks!Copy !req
610. Look, how about if I take over
and give you guys a break?Copy !req
611. Otay!Copy !req
612. Money, money.Copy !req
613. Spanky McFarland!Copy !req
614. Miss Crabtree!Copy !req
615. I would expect this from a
four-year-old, but not from you!Copy !req
616. Spanky, tricking people
out of their money is wrong.Copy !req
617. It's just like cheating
on your homework.Copy !req
618. - But I...
- What are we to do with all this money?Copy !req
619. We can't give it back
to these people one by one.Copy !req
620. Miss Crabtree, I got a suggestion.Copy !req
621. What we could do is...Copy !req
622. Interesting.Copy !req
623. Intriguing.Copy !req
624. I love it.Copy !req
625. MAN; Whoo! Nice suit, kid!Copy !req
626. "L" is for the way you look at meCopy !req
627. "O" is for the only one I seeCopy !req
628. "V" is very, very extraordinaryCopy !req
629. Now, "E" is even more
than anyone that you adoreCopy !req
630. And loveCopy !req
631. is all that I can give to youCopy !req
632. Love is more than just aCopy !req
633. game for twoCopy !req
634. Two in love can make itCopy !req
635. Take my heart
but please don't break itCopy !req
636. Love was made for me and youCopy !req
637. Dang.Copy !req
638. Miss Crabtree, do you got
room for just one more act?Copy !req
639. I think we could squeeze you in.Copy !req
640. - Thanks, Miss Crabtree!
- You're welcome.Copy !req
641. Well fellas, the president
saved your bacon.Copy !req
642. I convinced Miss Crabtree to
use the money as first prizeCopy !req
643. in the Go-Cart Derby.Copy !req
644. Just think, in three days,
the money's ours.Copy !req
645. Everything else
may have gone wrong,Copy !req
646. but there's no way
we can lose the race.Copy !req
647. Yeah!Copy !req
648. - The Blur belongs to Butch.
- And Woim.Copy !req
649. Well, if it isn't Falafel.Copy !req
650. - Alfalfa!
- Whatever.Copy !req
651. I hope you didn't miss
my duet with Darla.Copy !req
652. You call that a duet?Copy !req
653. It was stupendous.Copy !req
654. She wasn't bad either.Copy !req
655. Oh, my darlin', oh, my darlinCopy !req
656. What on Earth are you doing?Copy !req
657. I'm warmin' up my vocalizer.Copy !req
658. I'm about to win Darla back
through song.Copy !req
659. I'm the barber of Seville...Copy !req
660. Figaro, Figaro, Figaro...Copy !req
661. Don't you get it?
Darla can't stand you.Copy !req
662. Alfalfa, you're on.Copy !req
663. Darla will love me
after I sing to her.Copy !req
664. Darla can't resist my voice.
She said so herself.Copy !req
665. Come on, dear.Copy !req
666. This is a song
about a tragic romance.Copy !req
667. I once fell in love with a girl,Copy !req
668. and through schemes and
betrayals by my best friend,Copy !req
669. she came to think
I was nothing moreCopy !req
670. than a He-Man Woman Hater.Copy !req
671. But I'm a woman-lover!Copy !req
672. So let me raise a toast
to the girl I love most,Copy !req
673. in the whole world.Copy !req
674. Please don't say my name.
Please don't say my name.Copy !req
675. Darla.Copy !req
676. If I could make a wishCopy !req
677. I think I'd passCopy !req
678. Can't think of anything I needCopy !req
679. No cigarettes, no sleep...Copy !req
680. I'm gonna put that fool
out of his misery!Copy !req
681. No lights, no soundCopy !req
682. Nothing to eat, no books to readCopy !req
683. SometimesCopy !req
684. All I need is the air
that I breatheCopy !req
685. And to love youCopy !req
686. Whoa!Copy !req
687. All I need is the air
that I breatheCopy !req
688. Yes, to love youCopy !req
689. All I need is the air
that I breatheCopy !req
690. And to love youCopy !req
691. Oh, I hate you, Alfalfa.Copy !req
692. Dang!Copy !req
693. - Hey!
- Well, hello, Mr. Bubbles!Copy !req
694. That was the most
disgusting displayCopy !req
695. of she-man woman-loving
I've ever seen!Copy !req
696. Don't talk to me,
you Benedict Arnold!Copy !req
697. You, you Judas Priest!Copy !req
698. This is all your fault!Copy !req
699. - All my fault?
- You torched the clubhouse.Copy !req
700. And it's all my fault?Copy !req
701. Say, you're supposed to be guarding
the go-cart, you Muzak-warbling wimp!Copy !req
702. Relax, you double-crossing
mud-muncher!Copy !req
703. I parked it right over there!Copy !req
704. It was right here!Copy !req
705. - Well, where is it?
- Boy, you're messing up left and right!Copy !req
706. That's it, you sissified
tweety-bird!Copy !req
707. - I wish I had a club to throw you out of!
- Me too!Copy !req
708. Well, you sewage-swigging slime ball,Copy !req
709. if there still was a club, I'd quit!Copy !req
710. - Good!
- Humph!Copy !req
711. - What a wimp.
- Yeah.Copy !req
712. Why don't go make up
with him, Alfalfa?Copy !req
713. You guys have been friends
since you were one.Copy !req
714. He started it!Copy !req
715. And you should finish it.Copy !req
716. You're a team, like Bert and Ernie.Copy !req
717. Superman and Clark Kent,
Milli and Vanilli.Copy !req
718. At least go talk to him.
What could it cost?Copy !req
719. You mean, besides
my dignity and pride?Copy !req
720. All I know is,Copy !req
721. you only make
a once-in-a-lifetime buddy,Copy !req
722. once in a lifetime.Copy !req
723. - Is Spanky home?
- I'm sorry, Alfalfa. Spanky isn't here.Copy !req
724. I'm sorry, Spanky.
Alfalfa's not here.Copy !req
725. - Darn!
- Darn!Copy !req
726. I thought I'd find you here.Copy !req
727. I'm sorry I called you a
double-crossing mud-muncher,Copy !req
728. and a sewage-swigging slime ball.Copy !req
729. I'm sorry I called you
a sissified tweety-bird,Copy !req
730. and a Muzak-warbling wimp.Copy !req
731. I'm sorry I called you
a barf-encrusted jumbo jerk.Copy !req
732. You didn't call me
a barf-encrusted jumbo jerk.Copy !req
733. Oh. I guess I was just thinking it.Copy !req
734. I'm sorry about the fire.Copy !req
735. I'm sorry about messing up
your picnic lunch with Darla.Copy !req
736. Maybe I'm sort of responsible
for the fire too, a little.Copy !req
737. You know, Spanky, I like girls.Copy !req
738. It might even get worse
as I get older.Copy !req
739. I know you like girls, 'Falf.Copy !req
740. The problem is, rules is rules.Copy !req
741. But is woman-hating
the important thing?Copy !req
742. I mean, couldn't we be a club
'cause we like something?Copy !req
743. Hmm.Copy !req
744. Shoot! Without a clubhouse,
we don't have a club.Copy !req
745. Hey! You guys burned down
a clubhouse, not a club!Copy !req
746. A club is buddies who stick
together, no matter what!Copy !req
747. Uh-huh!Copy !req
748. I just wish we could still
enter the Go-Cart Derby.Copy !req
749. But it's impossible.Copy !req
750. Who says it's impossible?Copy !req
751. Every one of us,
working together...Copy !req
752. Pal, that's all
the possible we need!Copy !req
753. We need a hammer.
And nails.Copy !req
754. A motor.Copy !req
755. We need a battery and a chassis,Copy !req
756. four axles and a wheel belt.Copy !req
757. Somebody get a supercharger.Copy !req
758. Go get it, guys!Copy !req
759. Here, Petey.Copy !req
760. - Screwdriver.
- Screwdriver.Copy !req
761. - Ratchet.
- Ratchet!Copy !req
762. Hey, Uh-Huh,
does it stink in there?Copy !req
763. Uh-huh!Copy !req
764. Monkey wrench!Copy !req
765. Ta-dum!Copy !req
766. Do us proud, buddy.Copy !req
767. You betcha!Copy !req
768. Hey, everybody! Don't forget!Copy !req
769. Following the Go-Cart Derby, there
will be a tiny tot bunny race at 3:30.Copy !req
770. Entrants must be five years
and under. See you there!Copy !req
771. Ladies and gentlemen,
boys and girls,Copy !req
772. welcome to the 73rd Annual
Go-Cart Derby!Copy !req
773. Hey, guys, get in your cars!Copy !req
774. We're ready to start!Copy !req
775. You there, the kid in the blue.Copy !req
776. Stop horsing around.
You're gonna break your neck.Copy !req
777. How we gonna beat that?Copy !req
778. It looks like the Blur
with a new paint job!Copy !req
779. We're going to the raceCopy !req
780. We're goin' to win first placeCopy !req
781. And you have an ugly faceCopy !req
782. Hi, Dad, it's me.Copy !req
783. You're gonna be so proud of me.
I'm gonna win this race.Copy !req
784. Waldo, you're the best son
money can buy.Copy !req
785. Thanks, Dad.Copy !req
786. I don't have an ugly face.
You have an ugly face!Copy !req
787. You have an ugly face!Copy !req
788. - You have an ugly face!
- Your mother has an ugly face!Copy !req
789. Now the race course
is marked with arrows,Copy !req
790. and it ends right back here
where it started from.Copy !req
791. Oh, great!Copy !req
792. - This is the prize money for the winner.
- Okay.Copy !req
793. It's just about $500.Copy !req
794. - Just say it's from an anonymous donor.
- You got it.Copy !req
795. Waldo, hurry up. We're late!Copy !req
796. Oh, please. We're making an entrance.Copy !req
797. Just sit back, relax and
leave everything to moi.Copy !req
798. I wonder where A.J. Ferguson is.Copy !req
799. I don't know, but I can't wait to meet him.Copy !req
800. Okay guys, this is it.
Fasten your seat belts.Copy !req
801. Well, well. Mr. Johnston.
Nice of you to join us.Copy !req
802. The last car
is finally in position.Copy !req
803. Well, if it isn't Waldo.Copy !req
804. All the money in the world is no
substitute for hard work and ingenuity.Copy !req
805. You lead a rich fantasy life.Copy !req
806. Thank you.Copy !req
807. - Moron.
- What are you doing with that?Copy !req
808. It's Darla's handkerchief. All
great knights ride into battle,Copy !req
809. wearing the colors
of their lady fair.Copy !req
810. I'm not hearing this.
I'm not hearing this.Copy !req
811. Hey, look! My mom's here!Copy !req
812. Whoopee.Copy !req
813. The first racer to cross
the finish line will receive,Copy !req
814. this genuine, gold-plated, cubic
zirconium-encrusted trophy!Copy !req
815. As well as the prize of $500!Copy !req
816. Go! Go!Copy !req
817. Gentlemen, start your engines!Copy !req
818. All right, ready. Steady.Copy !req
819. One, two, three, go!Copy !req
820. - Whoo-hoo!
- Yeah! Whoo!Copy !req
821. String 'em, Woim!Copy !req
822. - Ah! Ah!
- Oh, no!Copy !req
823. - All right!
- Yeah!Copy !req
824. You snotwads stole our racer!Copy !req
825. Finders keepers, losers suck!Copy !req
826. Ah, bite me!Copy !req
827. Waldo, I think we have to turn here!Copy !req
828. Girls have no sense of direction.Copy !req
829. You know, you're starting
to get on my nerves.Copy !req
830. Huh? Uh-Oh!Copy !req
831. Oh!Copy !req
832. Watch out!Copy !req
833. Get out of the way!Copy !req
834. Coming through!Copy !req
835. - Excuse us!
- Move!Copy !req
836. - You little rascals!
- Sorry!Copy !req
837. 10 points for the old guy!Copy !req
838. It's time to lose these losers.
Atomic batteries to power.Copy !req
839. Turbines to speed!Copy !req
840. - They're gettin' away!
- Hold on to your beanie!Copy !req
841. Activate rocket boosters!Copy !req
842. You idiot! You put them in backwards!Copy !req
843. These two again?Copy !req
844. I really hate to do this.Copy !req
845. Huh?Copy !req
846. Yikes! Spikes!Copy !req
847. Hey! You could've killed them!Copy !req
848. Just forget about that
soap-sucking nincompoop!Copy !req
849. So you're responsible for the
bubbles at the talent show!Copy !req
850. Pull over right now! I'm not
finishing this race with you!Copy !req
851. You got it, babe.
Now get out.Copy !req
852. Where in tarnation are we?Copy !req
853. Look! We're back in the race!Copy !req
854. Hey, pretty good shortcut!Copy !req
855. Hey, how'd they get here?Copy !req
856. Don't worry. This'll fix 'em!Copy !req
857. - Yeah!
- What's that?Copy !req
858. We can't see!Copy !req
859. Where are we? Help!Copy !req
860. - What's going on?
- I can't see!Copy !req
861. My eyes! I can't see!Copy !req
862. Hey, mind your own
business, rich boy!Copy !req
863. What a guy! Thanks, pal!Copy !req
864. Grab the wheel!Copy !req
865. Are you crazy or something?
We got a finish line to cross!Copy !req
866. - Not without this!
- You're nuts!Copy !req
867. - Whoa!
- Watch out! You're gonna fall!Copy !req
868. I'm gonna fall off! Hold my feet!Copy !req
869. Hold on! We're almost there!Copy !req
870. Winner by a hair! Yes!Copy !req
871. You did it, Alfalfa!
You won!Copy !req
872. We did it! All Of us!Copy !req
873. Gentlemen,
let's give Alfalfa a big,Copy !req
874. "Spoley-oley!"Copy !req
875. Spoley-oley! Spoley-oley!
Spoley-oley! Spoley-oley!Copy !req
876. - Spoley-oley! Spoley-oley! Spoley-oley!
- Thank you.Copy !req
877. Thank you, thank you, thank
you, thank you, thank you.Copy !req
878. It ain't right!Copy !req
879. We go through all the trouble
of stealing your racer,Copy !req
880. and you still win!Copy !req
881. Better brace yourself, because now
I'm really gonna kick your butt!Copy !req
882. I'm usually a lover, not a fighterCopy !req
883. but in your case I'm willing
to make an exception.Copy !req
884. Pig puckey!Copy !req
885. Allow me!Copy !req
886. - Looking good, man.
- Yeah!Copy !req
887. Hey, there's the guy who
risked his neck for us!Copy !req
888. I got to admit, he turned out
to be pretty okay, darn it.Copy !req
889. Put it there, pal.
You're quite a guy.Copy !req
890. Us machismo types have a club,Copy !req
891. the He-Man Woman Haters Club.Copy !req
892. Alfalfa, I'm extending
a membership offer here.Copy !req
893. - Now, what is it?
- That's not Waldo!Copy !req
894. You'll be hearing from my lawyers.Copy !req
895. Then who's this guy
who saved our butts?Copy !req
896. Hi, guys. What's up?Copy !req
897. A girl! Oh!Copy !req
898. Well, don't that beat all.Copy !req
899. Spanky!Copy !req
900. And now it gives me great pleasureCopy !req
901. to present this beautiful trophy,Copy !req
902. and the prize money,Copy !req
903. to Alfalfa Switzer and
Spanky McFarland.Copy !req
904. Is that a cowlick, or are
you just glad to see me?Copy !req
905. Ah, the strong, silent type, eh?Copy !req
906. Don't take this personal, lady,Copy !req
907. but my pal's real disappointed.Copy !req
908. Oh! What's the matter, sugar pie?Copy !req
909. Well, we were just
kinda hopin' that,Copy !req
910. A.J. Ferguson was
going to give us the trophy.Copy !req
911. Well, boys, today's your lucky day.Copy !req
912. 'Cause that's exactly who I am!Copy !req
913. You're the best driver there is!Copy !req
914. Well, thank you very much!
You didn't do so bad yourself!Copy !req
915. Say, let's even things up.
How about one on this side?Copy !req
916. There you go!Copy !req
917. What a great race!Copy !req
918. I saw what you did to
save my hanky, Alfalfa.Copy !req
919. That was very heartwarming.Copy !req
920. And awfully romantical.Copy !req
921. Gee, thanks, but I
thought you hated me.Copy !req
922. I don't hate you. It's just
sometimes you do mean things,Copy !req
923. like playing tricks
on me at our picnic.Copy !req
924. I can explain that.Copy !req
925. It was me who wrecked
your picnic with Alfalfa.Copy !req
926. You see, I thought you was
trying to steal my best friend.Copy !req
927. I thought you were trying
to sabotage our club.Copy !req
928. But I think I was wrong.Copy !req
929. I'm sorry, you guys.Copy !req
930. My Alfalfinator!Copy !req
931. My delectable Darlooney!Copy !req
932. - So, do you live around here?
- Yeah.Copy !req
933. Do you like dolls?Copy !req
934. Mmm-mmm. Mmm-mmm.Copy !req
935. I do!Copy !req
936. Cool.Copy !req
937. Say!Copy !req
938. Have we betrayed our forefathers?Copy !req
939. Have we trampled on the generations
of honest woman-haters,Copy !req
940. who came before us?Copy !req
941. Uh-uh.Copy !req
942. Hey, everybody!Copy !req
943. Uh-Huh's learned a new word!Copy !req
944. Actually, I've always had a
rather extensive vocabulary,Copy !req
945. not to mention a phenomenal
grasp of grammarCopy !req
946. and a superlative
command of syntax.Copy !req
947. I simply chose not to employ them.Copy !req
948. Otay!Copy !req
949. Well, I guess things just
have to change sometimes.Copy !req
950. What's my line?Copy !req
951. - Hmm?
- What?Copy !req
952. - Let's start over again.
- I don't want to!Copy !req
953. - You don't want to?
- No.Copy !req
954. - You got the hiccups?
- Yes.Copy !req
955. Okay, cut.Copy !req
956. - I used to have this...
- Don't worry.Copy !req
957. I forgot the word!Copy !req
958. What are you doing?Copy !req
959. Hmm!Copy !req
960. Oh!Copy !req
961. What a relief!Copy !req
962. - Yuck!
- Ooh!Copy !req
963. Allow me to introduce myself.Copy !req
964. - What an idiot.
- Watch it, bud.Copy !req
965. You have the most, and...Copy !req
966. Don't look at the camera, sweetie.Copy !req
967. Honey, don't look at the camera.Copy !req
968. Don't look at the camera.
Don't look at the camera.Copy !req
969. Brittany, stop looking
at the camera, please.Copy !req
970. Brittany!Copy !req
971. I winded my ear up.Copy !req
972. Now the race course is
marked off with arrows.Copy !req
973. And it'll start right...
And it'll end.Copy !req
974. Thank you. And it will end.Copy !req
975. Paper or plastic?Copy !req
976. And it will end, and it ends.Copy !req
977. It ends. Right. I knew
I'd find it somewhere.Copy !req
978. That is bad popcorn.Copy !req
979. Cut.Copy !req
980. You'll tell me when...
We're not going yet... Okay.Copy !req
981. Now the race course
is marked off with arrows.Copy !req
982. And it ends right back here
where it started from.Copy !req
983. - And cut.
- Cutting.Copy !req
984. I finally got that sucker.Copy !req
985. Otay!Copy !req