- 1. Your Grace.
- 2. Sergeant, I'm here on behalf
of the Red Cross
- 3. and I'd like to speak
with General Kitchener.
- 4. There is no General Kitchener here.
- 5. Your Grace? Your Grace?
Let... Let him in.
- 6. Well, if Morton's here,
then Kitchener can't be far away.
- 7. My apologies, Your Grace.
- 8. Security's paramount right now.
- 9. It's a secret that you're
visiting with the general.
- 10. We can't be too careful
with these Boers
- 11. and their guerrilla tactics.
- 12. Too careful?
- 13. Looks like this place
could use a lot more care.
- 14. Begging your pardon, sir,
but these concentration camps
- 15. are the reason we're winning this war.
- 16. This way.
- 17. Orlando. Our knight in shining armor.
- 18. Thank you for coming.
- 19. What's going on, Kitchener?
- 20. It seems that you've been
- 21. somewhat liberal with the truth.
- 22. Time has not been kind here.
- 23. Well, you'll have to explain that
- 24. On my return to England,
it will be my first port of call.
- 25. She's outside,
- 26. with Conrad.
- 27. Why are we here, Mother?
- 28. Do you remember why
King Arthur and his knights
- 29. had a round table?
- 30. Because it meant
that all men were equal.
- 31. It's important that people
born into privilege
- 32. lead by example.
- 33. That's why your father and I
are patrons of the Red Cross.
- 34. Helping others,
- 35. not hiding behind our status.
- 36. Never forget that.
- 37. Hmm?
- 38. I'm just going to check on your father.
- 39. Stay here, Conrad.
- 40. This terrible war would be over, Shola,
- 41. if King Arthur and his
noble knights were still here.
- 42. Of course.
And which one would you be?
- 43. I'd be Lancelot.
- 44. Father would be Arthur.
- 45. And you, the mighty Merlin.
- 46. Really?
- 47. This is ridiculous.
We're wasting precious time.
- 48. Look around, people are dying.
- 49. We have emergency supplies
from the Red Cross.
- 50. Thank God she's on our side.
- 51. Well, on my side, at least.
- 52. She's more of a force
- 53. than any of our enemies.
- 54. There's General Kitchener.
- 55. Well, open the gates!
Bring in those supplies!
- 56. Emily!
- 57. Lie down until I get back.
- 58. Go back to Conrad.
- 59. Go to hell, Kitchener.
- 60. I got him! Stop fire!
- 61. Emily!
- 62. Cease fire!
- 63. Emily.
- 64. Darling, I'm here.
- 65. I'm here. Darling, I'm here.
- 66. That's it. I'm here.
You have to stay with me.
- 67. You have to stay with me.
- 68. Darling?
- 69. Protect our son.
- 70. Protect him from this world. And...
- 71. Never let him see war again.
- 72. Promise me.
- 73. I promise.
- 74. - You know, Conrad...
- 75. Up there, I feel free.
- 76. Yes, I'm very much looking forward
to my first solo flight.
- 77. Remember what happened
to Icarus, Conrad,
- 78. when he flew too close to the sun.
- 79. Well, I remember him
needing to escape, no?
- 80. Well, he got burned.
- 81. I think we both see
that story differently.
- 82. - Welcome home, Your Grace.
- Thank you, Shola.
- 83. - Afternoon, everyone.
- Afternoon, Your Grace.
- 84. Ready for your maiden flight yet, Shola?
- 85. Well, if God wanted man to fly,
- 86. he would have given him wings.
- 87. Yes, I suppose.
You drive Father's car?
- 88. Mmm-hmm.
- 89. You haven't any wheels.
- 90. Nanny Watkins.
- 91. My study in five minutes.
- 92. Your Grace.
- 93. Your Grace.
- 94. I should be reprimanding you
for your insolence.
- 95. Your opinion behind closed doors
is one thing, Polly,
- 96. but I will not tolerate
- 97. in front of my household.
- 98. I'll play by your rules
when you play by mine.
- 99. Do you really think
you can keep secrets from me?
- 100. What do you mean?
- 101. Once again, you've turned down
Cousin Felix's invitation
- 102. for Conrad to stay with him in Russia.
- 103. And how do you know that?
- 104. Us nannies love a good gossip.
- 105. And we've all noticed
- 106. that you've no problem
with Felix traveling here,
- 107. but you seem to have a problem
with Conrad traveling there.
- 108. Or anywhere, for that matter.
- 109. Yeah. Guilty as charged.
Well, I'm sorry.
- 110. I should have discussed it with you.
- 111. Has all this flying around in circles
- 112. made you forget your manners?
- 113. Well, what have I done now?
- 114. You haven't even offered me a drink.
- 115. Oh, yes, I'm sorry.
- 116. And if we had discussed this,
- 117. what would my opinion have been?
- 118. You think that my
- 119. fear for Conrad's safety is a weakness.
- 120. Fear is natural.
- 121. The problem is,
the more you fear something,
- 122. the more likely it is to come true.
- 123. Hmm. So, then,
we're both in need of a nanny.
- 124. So it would seem.
- 125. Higher!
- 126. Can you fight with only one arm?
- 127. Oh, yes.
- 128. If I had someone left to fight.
- 129. Shola. Do you really think
a knife can beat a bullet?
- 130. This is how people
are fighting nowadays.
- 131. Now, clean yourselves up
- 132. before this afternoon's appointment.
- 133. My father also brought me here
for my first suit.
- 134. Kingsman, world's finest tailor.
- 135. - Morning.
- Your Grace.
- 136. Fitting room number one
is ready for you.
- 137. Thank you.
- 138. Well, here we are.
- 139. I wish your mother could see you now.
- 140. She would've been so proud.
- 141. I hope so, Father.
- 142. Although, I might get more use
out of a shooting suit or
- 143. a smoking jacket, you know.
- 144. Whatever might help
in the pursuit of fine birds.
- 145. Oh, come on, Father.
- 146. It's a big world out there.
- 147. Sooner or later,
- 148. you're going to have to
let me enjoy it, even if,
- 149. you know, even if you don't want to.
- 150. You know,
- 151. Conrad,
- 152. our ancestors,
they were terrible people.
- 153. They robbed, lied, pillaged,
and killed, until one day,
- 154. they found themselves noblemen.
- 155. But that nobility,
- 156. it never came from chivalry.
- 157. It came from being tough and ruthless.
- 158. Back then, to be called a "gentleman"
- 159. would have been a death sentence.
- 160. Not the mark of honor it is today.
- 161. We are Oxfords,
- 162. not rogues.
- 163. Oxford!
- 164. Kitchener.
- 165. Well, so glad we share the same tailor.
- 166. Indeed. Well, the Kingsman clientele
is enough to make any club envious.
- 167. Mmm-hmm. Oxford, can I
borrow you for a moment?
- 168. Is there somewhere private?
- 169. May I suggest the pattern room
- 170. Perfect.
- 171. Conrad, this is Morton,
- 172. Morton, look after
young Conrad for us, will you?
- 173. It will be my pleasure, my lord.
- 174. Good.
- 175. I gather you turned down
our Austrian friend
- 176. Archduke Ferdinand's
invitation to his shoot.
- 177. Surely your pacifism doesn't extend
- 178. to a few birds, does it?
- 179. Us bumping into each other here
- 180. was no coincidence, was it?
- 181. Walls have ears
in Whitehall these days.
- 182. Which is why I felt Kingsman
a safer place for a chat.
- 183. Mmm-hmm.
- 184. I'm worried that Ferdinand's
- 185. may be putting him in danger.
- 186. I need you to do me a small favor.
- 187. What sort of favor?
- 188. So, you're serious
about being a soldier?
- 189. - Oh, yes.
- Which regiment?
- 190. Uh... Grenadiers.
- 191. Grenadiers. Well,
- 192. when the time comes, contact me.
- 193. I'll see what I can do.
- 194. Conrad.
- 195. You're going to need
that shooting suit after all.
- 196. My Shepherd.
- 197. I have a Fabergé egg
made especially for you.
- 198. And look inside.
- 199. A little replica of Angus,
- 200. your favorite goat.
- 201. You're late.
- 202. Take a seat.
- 203. What is trust? Hmm?
- 204. Trust is having confidence
- 205. in the honesty of another.
- 206. That will be our weapon
- 207. to change the world.
- 208. Who do I trust?
- 209. Animals.
- 210. They never let me down
- 211. and they follow my commands blindly.
- 212. The question I now have is
- 213. can I trust you to behave like them?
- 214. Open the boxes in front of you.
- 215. These rings will be the symbol
of membership to my flock.
- 216. Put them on, and you will
share in our successes.
- 217. But,
- 218. break my trust,
- 219. and inside you will find
- 220. my final gift to you.
- 221. A tortoise?
- 222. Am I not worthy of a better animal?
- 223. Rasputin, I have a bear.
I will happily exchange it with you.
- 224. Yes, Princip.
I will be the great bear of Russia.
- 225. Take what you believe is yours.
- 226. And by all means,
- 227. treat our Shepherd
with the same respect you hold
- 228. for that joke of a man
who calls himself your tsar.
- 229. Go ahead, Rasputin, take it.
- 230. I dare you.
- 231. Now, now, Mata and Erik.
- 232. We are a team.
- 233. And Rasputin here...
- 234. Is like my beloved Angus.
- 235. Always butting
- 236. and fucking.
- 237. But do not mistake fondness
- 238. you late Russian fuckstick!
- 239. As everybody knows,
- 240. the tortoise
- 241. eventually wins the race.
- 242. Now...
- 243. My spy, or should I say my mole,
- 244. in the British government
- 245. informs me that Kitchener is
concerned for the safety
- 246. of the Archduke Ferdinand.
- 247. Princip, my wee bear.
- 248. Are you ready to prove
- 249. Kitchener's concerns are justified?
- 250. Yes, I am, my Shepherd.
And I will not let you down.
- 251. Damn fucking right.
- 252. Does that make sense
to you, Ferdinand?
- 253. Ah, now I understand
- 254. why you accepted my shooting invitation.
- 255. I didn't really believe
Kitchener's scare tactics.
- 256. Harping on about my being in danger.
- 257. Well, only a fool ignores
a friend's warning, Ferdi.
- 258. Is it really too much to ask?
- 259. I think you should come back with me
and hear what he has to say.
- 260. Turning you down is a hard task.
- 261. I will give you my decision tonight.
- 262. Good.
- 263. Drive! Drive!
- 264. I come here on a visit of goodwill,
- 265. to be greeted by bombs?
- 266. Yes.
- 267. It gives me special pleasure...
- 268. I... I shouldn't have brought you here.
- 269. We need to get home,
where I can protect you.
- 270. What...
- 271. I just protected you.
I don't need protecting.
- 272. Yes, you do, Conrad. I'm sorry,
- 273. but you think you know
what the world is like,
- 274. but the truth is, you're just a boy
- 275. who has no idea
what men are capable of.
- 276. What? Watching my mother die
wasn't a good enough introduction?
- 277. Are you sure this is right?
- 278. Just follow my orders.
- 279. Take the first left.
- 280. It's a dead end, you fool.
- 281. I knew this was the wrong way.
- 282. I meant the next left.
- 283. Stop arguing.
We're sitting ducks here.
- 284. Get this car moving now.
- 285. Father, it's terrible
about Ferdi and Sophie.
- 286. We're safe now, aren't we?
- 287. Yes, but for how long?
- 288. I'm beginning to understand
what Kitchener was so afraid of.
- 289. Already there are rumors
- 290. the Austrians are mobilizing their army.
- 291. They don't believe this assassin
- 292. And neither do I.
- 293. It's just Serbia.
- 294. I mean, it's such
a small part of the world.
- 295. Why do they care?
- 296. Well, because small things
can grow into big problems.
- 297. You see, years ago,
- 298. there were three young cousins.
- 299. The eldest was a real troublemaker...
- 300. Put my soldier back!
- 301. There are no rules in war.
- 302. I'll teach you war, Wilhelm!
- 303. Their grandmother
was Queen Victoria...
- 304. Nicholas. Enough!
- 305. Who kept them in line.
- 306. They grew up to become
Kaiser Wilhelm of Germany,
- 307. Tsar Nicholas of Russia,
and King George of England.
- 308. And now,
poor Ferdinand's assassination
- 309. has given the moronic kaiser
- 310. a reason to reignite
their childhood feud.
- 311. But surely they've matured
enough to avoid a war?
- 312. One would hope so.
- 313. And, thankfully,
we have our own King George
- 314. to help keep the peace.
- 315. Ah. There it is.
- 316. Look at us.
- 317. Three young cousins
- 318. who thought they knew how to rule.
- 319. But now the soldiers are real.
- 320. Get two copies of this photograph made
- 321. and have them delivered
with these letters immediately.
- 322. I'll have Morton see to it personally.
- 323. Excellent.
- 324. Your Majesty.
- 325. - Erik.
- My kaiser.
- 326. "Restraint is a virtue.
Remember your duty."
- 327. His Majesty, my cousin,
the king of England,
- 328. strongly suggests we do nothing.
- 329. Remember how Prince George
used to enjoy it
- 330. when your English mother
- 331. and her English doctors
would torture you?
- 332. George would tease you about your...
- 333. deformities.
- 334. Yeah, yeah. Yeah.
- 335. And don't forget
that sniggering at his side
- 336. was your little Russian cousin,
- 337. Tsar Nicholas.
- 338. Cousin George
is imploring self-restraint
- 339. against our other cousin,
the moronic kaiser.
- 340. King George has always
protected our interests.
- 341. Why would we go to war
over something so trivial?
- 342. Because we gave Serbia our word.
- 343. And besides, I hate the kaiser.
- 344. It will be good for his oversized ego
- 345. to match his undersized hand.
- 346. A wise decision, my tsar.
- 347. The soul of Russia is safe
in your hands.
- 348. The world will laugh at you
- 349. for not keeping your word
and standing by the Austrians.
- 350. Ignore the English king.
- 351. Tell George to mind
his own business, ja?
- 352. Huh?
- 353. If I want a war, then I will have it.
- 354. As Russia's ally,
- 355. we have no choice but to join this war.
- 356. I don't understand.
The kaiser and the tsar
- 357. have both ignored
the king's wishes. Why?
- 358. That's a good question.
- 359. - I...
- With all due respect, sir,
- 360. this debate should happen
after we have won the war.
- 361. The prime minister is waiting.
- 362. And we're late.
- 363. Morton's right.
- 364. My lord, it would be
my honor to volunteer.
- 365. Honor?
- 366. Fine words, young Conrad.
- 367. But therein lies the problem.
- 368. Legally, you're not old enough
to join up.
- 369. Hmm. But still young enough to believe
- 370. it's an honorable thing
to die for one's country.
- 371. The object of war is not
to die for one's country,
- 372. but to make the enemy die for theirs.
- 373. Fix bayonets!
- 374. Not even I
- 375. could have imagined a war like this.
- 376. What I thought would take
a decade for us to achieve
- 377. has taken two short years.
- 378. We have drained Europe's resources
- 379. and millions have died pointlessly.
- 380. Fire!
- 381. We have broken the trust
- 382. between the people
and the inbred monarchs
- 383. who only rule
due to their fortunate birth.
- 384. Do you know who hates King George
- 385. more than the kaiser?
- 386. Me.
- 387. The English monarchy
- 388. has oppressed my beloved Scotland
- 389. for over 700 years
- 390. and it is time for retribution.
- 391. We will pull Russia out of our war
- 392. and unleash the full might of Germany
- 393. to destroy England.
- 394. Rasputin,
- 395. are you ready to begin
the demise of King George?
- 396. Thy will be done, my Shepherd.
- 397. They've started conscription.
- 398. Yes, I'm well aware of that, Conrad.
- 399. And?
- 400. Well, it was bad enough
- 401. I didn't join when it was voluntary...
- 402. Conrad, this is not a war.
Do you understand?
- 403. It's not like any war
that we've ever seen.
- 404. I don't care! I should be fighting.
- 405. It's not fighting. It's dying.
- 406. Much like this conversation.
- 407. Tell that to Kitchener.
- 408. You're still too young, Conrad.
- 409. But everyone's lying
about their age.
- 410. - They're all going over.
- I know.
- 411. And I know you want to fight.
- 412. It's a testament to your character
- 413. and I'm proud of you for it.
- 414. Yes, but look what I was given.
- 415. In the village.
- 416. It's the symbol of a coward.
- 417. And I should suffer such humiliation?
- 418. Reputation is what people think of you.
- 419. Character is what you are.
- 420. Victoria Cross.
- 421. Is it yours?
- 422. Yes.
- 423. When I was young,
- 424. like you, I wanted to serve my country.
- 425. But soon I began
to question what right we had
- 426. to take the land, riches,
- 427. and the lives of people
- 428. who were only defending their homeland.
- 429. Every man I killed,
- 430. I killed a piece of myself.
- 431. Maybe having a feather
would have been better.
- 432. So, the next day, I put down my rifle
- 433. and I picked up a stretcher.
- 434. I should've been given
the Cross for saving lives,
- 435. not taking them.
- 436. As soon as I replace this
with my own medal,
- 437. I'll join the medical corps.
- 438. I have informed Kitchener
- 439. of your intention of joining up.
- 440. And he has assured me that he will not
- 441. let you slip through.
- 442. I have a vision.
- 443. This boy is the symbol
of the soul of Russia.
- 444. You must save Russia.
- 445. You must pull out of the war
to save your son's life.
- 446. This is nonsense.
- 447. You dare to question
the vessel of the Lord?
- 448. You dare to risk your son's life?
- 449. Nicholas, come to your senses now!
- 450. Please.
- 451. Please.
- 452. My dear cousin Conrad.
- 453. It has been too long
since we last saw each other
- 454. and I'm sorry I'm only writing
to you now, but...
- 455. In these difficult times,
I'm not sure whom I can trust.
- 456. Welcome back.
- 457. For a while now,
I've harbored my suspicions
- 458. of this so-called priest, Rasputin.
- 459. He has the tsar under his spell,
- 460. both spiritually and through opium,
- 461. and has persuaded him
to withdraw from the war.
- 462. The tsar intends to announce this
- 463. in his New Year's speech.
- 464. Cousin Felix sends his regards.
- 465. Oh.
- 466. I hope your
father's influence can help.
- 467. Morton, any ideas?
- 468. Well, sir, in my opinion,
- 469. this is a very grave situation.
- 470. We can trust absolutely no one.
- 471. I suggest we assemble
an elite squad of men,
- 472. we go to Russia,
and we sort it out ourselves.
- 473. Agreed. See to it immediately.
- 474. As I'm not allowed to join up,
may I at least go with you?
- 475. Conrad, you know your father
made me swear that I would...
- 476. Protect my son at all costs.
- 477. Where do you want to go, Conrad?
- 478. - Russia.
- 479. To help Cousin Yusupov
deal with Rasputin.
- 480. He's going to force Russia
out of the war.
- 481. Kitchener, have you killed so many men
- 482. that you're now relying on boys
to run your military intelligence?
- 483. - How dare you speak to...
- Shut up, Morton.
- 484. Conrad, we're leaving.
- 485. Now!
- 486. Your lordship?
- 487. Let's just hope we don't make
such a mess of things in Russia.
- 488. One more dispatch box for tonight, sir.
- 489. Damn it, Morton.
- 490. How much do you expect a man to read?
- 491. I'm terribly sorry, my lord.
- 492. I would help, but I'm definitely...
- 493. definitely more of a soldier
than I am a sailor.
- 494. Well, go outside, man, and get some air.
- 495. Quite right.
- 496. Five million dead.
- 497. May God forgive me.
- 498. First Ferdinand,
and now Kitchener.
- 499. This was not an accident.
- 500. Kitchener was your friend.
- 501. Not to mention this country's last hope.
- 502. How can you be so calm?
- 503. My dear Oxford.
- 504. I wanted to apologize
for our recent fracas.
- 505. In my opinion,
Conrad is a fine young man.
- 506. He was betrayed.
We must do something.
- 507. Always ready to face the world.
- 508. No, don't ignore me, Father.
You know it's true.
- 509. You cannot keep running away
- 510. But I shall, of course,
- 511. respect your wishes
- 512. and do everything I can
to keep him out of harm's way.
- 513. I don't believe it was a German mine.
- 514. There is something more afoot.
- 515. And what if you're successful?
- 516. What if you're successful
- 517. and keep me locked away
as the world burns?
- 518. If all parents
shared your outlook,
- 519. there would be no wars.
- 520. But until that day comes,
I will no doubt be kept busy.
- 521. I remain your friend, Kitch.
- 522. Your incessant need to protect me
- 523. will not redeem your own failure
to protect Mother.
- 524. I'm sorry, Father.
- 525. No, no.
- 526. I'm sorry.
- 527. Follow me.
- 528. Well, about time.
- 529. Welcome to the club.
- 530. Is he part of the briefing?
- 531. Yes.
- 532. Take a look.
- 533. You see, this war has made me realize
- 534. that we cannot rely on politicians
- 535. to do their job properly.
- 536. So, I decided
- 537. that we should do something about it.
- 538. This isn't making any sense
to me, Father.
- 539. Let me explain.
- 540. My reputation is of a man
not wanting to be involved,
- 541. which means that my character
- 542. finds it much easier
to be involved unnoticed.
- 543. Just like domestic servants everywhere
- 544. who are seen but not heard.
- 545. Essentially invisible.
- 546. Unless they're part
of the Oxford family, of course.
- 547. Shola and Polly have gathered
- 548. a network of domestics
- 549. such as the world has never seen.
- 550. While British intelligence
listens at keyholes,
- 551. our people are actually in the room.
- 552. - Very clever.
- 553. Now, after Ferdinand's assassination,
- 554. I visited Gavrilo Princip
in his prison in Sarajevo.
- 555. Thank you.
- 556. Why did you kill my friend?
- 557. It was the alcohol. I was overcome.
- 558. I'm just a simple Serb.
- 559. A very expensive ring
for such a simple Serb.
- 560. Ah, and a secret compartment.
- 561. That smelled of almonds.
- 562. Princip's ring proves
he was not acting alone.
- 563. There is, as you say, Conrad,
- 564. Indeed.
- 565. Your cousin's letter made us
extend our network to Russia
- 566. and it paid off.
- 567. The tsar's nanny found a ring
in Rasputin's chambers.
- 568. Identical to Princip's,
- 569. but with a tortoise instead of a bear.
- 570. Then I think we must
go to Russia immediately
- 571. and find a way to interrogate this monk.
- 572. But by all accounts,
Rasputin is unbreakable.
- 573. As long as he's alive,
- 574. the tsar will never change his mind
- 575. and with Russia out of the war,
- 576. England is doomed.
- 577. My lord.
- 578. One life to save millions.
- 579. So,
- 580. the only way to honor the vow
I made to your mother
- 581. is to break the vow I made to myself.
- 582. I'm afraid we have no other choice.
- 583. It is time for us
to kill Grigori Rasputin.
- 584. Rasputin has accepted an invitation
- 585. to your cousin's Christmas ball.
- 586. The tsar's nanny informs me
- 587. of Rasputin's weakness for sweet cakes.
- 588. And even sweeter boys.
- 589. So, after the main course is served,
- 590. Conrad will entice Rasputin
- 591. to a private dessert in the summer room,
- 592. where nanny's legendary Bakewell tart,
- 593. laced with poison,
- 594. will be waiting for him.
- 595. Polly, get baking.
- 596. Yes. And don't forget the poison.
- 597. Get him to eat
the cake. Understand?
- 598. Yes, Father.
- 599. Good. Tonight we will be rogues,
- 600. not Oxfords.
- 601. Our guest of honor, Father Rasputin.
- 602. Are you waiters or Englishmen?
- 603. Whatever you are,
get me a fucking drink.
- 604. Are you a monk or a ballet dancer?
- 605. I see you've mastered
the Beryozka glide.
- 606. Why don't you glide over there
and get me a fucking drink?
- 607. Englishmen.
- 608. I like the English.
- 609. But it's a long way to come
for a Christmas party.
- 610. Well, for me, yes.
But not for my son,
- 611. who is certainly
a lot more fun than I am
- 612. in these dark days.
- 613. I'm looking for someone who can help me
- 614. gain an audience with the tsar.
- 615. Perhaps you can be of assistance.
- 616. But I am just a humble monk.
- 617. Mmm, a humble monk
that this whole room reveres
- 618. or fears.
- 619. I only make decisions
when my stomach is full
- 620. or my balls are empty.
- 621. Well, thank God dinner is being served.
- 622. So, uh,
- 623. your father tells me
you like to have fun.
- 624. Yes. I believe
I'm sufficiently open-minded.
- 625. What is it that you Russians do
- 626. that an Englishman can enjoy?
- 627. Well, everything.
- 628. Food, music, ballet,
- 629. tobacco, art.
- 630. But most of all...
- 631. we like to fuck like tigers.
- 632. Is that something
an English boy might enjoy?
- 633. Yes.
- 634. Hmm... But tonight
I do not want to teach.
- 635. Change seats with your father.
- 636. I'm so sorry if I have offended you.
- 637. Only if you consider
being boring offensive.
- 638. Now do as you're told.
- 639. Yes.
- 640. Sorry, Father.
He wants us to swap places.
- 641. Excuse me, forgive me. Forgive me.
- 642. This leg is a fearful curse.
- 643. You know, if I didn't know any better,
- 644. I'd say your son was trying to fuck me.
- 645. More likely you were trying to fuck him.
- 646. Your reputation precedes you.
- 647. Well, if you know so much
about my reputation,
- 648. put your leg in my lap.
- 649. I may be able to fix it.
- 650. - Here?
- Not here.
- 651. Somewhere private, of course.
- 652. Here we are.
- 653. You are expecting someone?
- 654. Yes, our nanny is a wonderful cook,
- 655. so she's made this cake
- 656. as a gift for our host, the prince.
- 657. Please,
- 658. take your trousers off and sit down.
- 659. Certainly.
- 660. I will make the room warm for you.
- 661. In summer, I come here
- 662. with my young friends.
- 663. Swim naked in the bathing pond,
- 664. then come inside
and fuck in front of the fire.
- 665. Naturally.
- 666. Ah, there we are.
- 667. Trousers off.
- 668. Mmm.
- 669. Steady.
- 670. Blood is life.
- 671. Its flow is healing.
- 672. And I can teach it where to flow.
- 673. Hmm...
- 674. - Oh.
- 675. Your wound was fixed superficially
- 676. and with very poor needle work.
- 677. Hmm.
- 678. This cake is good, no?
- 679. Yes. It's Bakewell tart.
It's my favorite.
- 680. We can eat it together
when I put my trousers back on.
- 681. No. Well, to do this properly,
- 682. I will need energy.
- 683. Hmm...
- 684. It's very good.
- 685. Hmm.
- 686. Very English.
- 687. Yes. It's very English.
- 688. Hmm.
- 689. What's that noise?
- 690. - We should go in.
- No, no.
- 691. It's Rasputin, not your father.
- 692. I think it's the poison killing him.
- 693. Relax. Let the blood flow.
- 694. - Let me lick your wounds.
- 695. - Trust me. Trust me.
- Oh, God.
- 696. - Oh, my, I can see it.
- Trust me.
- 697. Don't worry, I will help you,
and you will help me.
- 698. Why do you want to see the tsar?
- 699. The tsar needs to stay in the war.
- 700. What makes you think he won't?
- 701. I'm told he's being influenced.
- 702. Good. Now we are getting somewhere.
- 703. So, if you really want your leg fixed,
- 704. tell me the truth.
- 705. Why are you here?
- 706. I'm here...
- 707. - Because?
- 708. - Because?
- 709. - Because?
- Because I'm going to kill...
- 710. I apologize.
- 711. Your cake...
- 712. did not agree with me.
- 713. Come!
- 714. We must ice your leg.
- 715. Only two minutes in the cold water,
- 716. and you will be like a new man.
- 717. - My... My leg...
- 718. - Is healed.
- 719. - Yes.
- Walk to me.
- 720. No. No, no, no. Not the cane.
- 721. Leave the cane.
- 722. - Oh, yes.
- Leave the cane.
- 723. I didn't believe you.
- 724. Come to me. Come to me.
- 725. - Why is Father laughing?
- I have no idea.
- 726. Now let the cold...
- 727. Russian water...
- 728. heal you forever.
- 729. Come. Come. Come. Come.
- 730. - Oh!
- Come. Come.
- 731. - Yes. Yes, yes.
- It's freezing.
- 732. Let Mother Nature work her magic.
- 733. Two minutes.
- 734. Two minutes, and you will be healed.
- 735. You will be healed.
- 736. Bakewell tart.
- 737. Tell me, a lot of almonds
in Bakewell tart.
- 738. What other ingredients in Bakewell tart?
- 739. I have no idea. I'm not a cook.
- 740. Well, I am.
- 741. And I also know
what else smells like almonds.
- 742. Cyanide!
- 743. If you really knew
- 744. you'd know I take a little poison
- 745. - He's in trouble.
- To keep myself immune.
- 746. Now, that's more like it.
- 747. Time to dance... on your graves.
- 748. Go and help your father.
- 749. Father. Father.
Oh, God. You're freezing.
- 750. Father, are you all right? Breathe.
- 751. I'm so cold. I'm so cold.
- 752. Shola.
- 753. Shola.
- 754. Do it. Do it!
- 755. Do it!
- 756. Shoot me.
- 757. Please kill me.
- 758. Beautiful boy.
- 759. I fixed your leg.
- 760. Which is more than I can say
for your son's neck.
- 761. Thank you for my new leg.
- 762. Are you all right?
- 763. I'm fine. Thank you.
- 764. No. Thank you. You saved my life.
- 765. And you, mine.
- 766. - What about Shola?
- 767. He'll be all right.
He just needs to sleep it off.
- 768. Why is it that boys
are always so messy?
- 769. Pick him up. It's time to go.
- 770. You have got to be
fucking kidding me!
- 771. I want you to pick up
where Rasputin failed.
- 772. I don't care about your ideology
or your politics.
- 773. Just start your fucking revolution
- 774. and get Russia out of my war,
- 775. Comrade Lenin.
- 776. Yes, my Shepherd.
- 777. When my revolution is complete,
- 778. the flocks left will be so powerful,
- 779. your one problem
will be finding my equal
- 780. to balance from the right.
- 781. What's wrong with him?
- 782. Today your father broke
his vow of pacifism.
- 783. But it was the right thing to do.
- 784. Right or wrong,
it doesn't make it any easier.
- 785. Happy birthday to you
- 786. Happy birthday to you
- 787. Happy birthday, dearest Conrad
- 788. Happy birthday to you
- 789. Good boy.
- 790. To my son.
- 791. Thank you.
- 792. Today, you proved yourself a man
- 793. and you've made us all very proud.
- 794. A toast to our successful mission
- 795. and my new leg.
- 796. Happy birthday, Conrad.
- 797. Happy birthday.
- 798. Thank you, Father.
- 799. I'm glad that we can
finally see eye to eye.
- 800. Well, we can now.
- 801. Now that I've blown out 19 candles,
- 802. I'm sure you'll give me your blessing
- 803. as I join up and finally
fulfill my duty to my country.
- 804. Conrad, you've just exceeded
your duty to your country.
- 805. My wishes have nothing
to do with your age.
- 806. Father, your wishes were only granted
because of my age.
- 807. There's nothing you can do
to stop me now.
- 808. All I ask for is your blessing,
- 809. I'm sorry, Conrad.
- 810. But you're asking for the one thing
- 811. that I cannot and I will not give you.
- 812. My kaiser.
- 813. Our naval blockade around England
- 814. has sunk another
American passenger ship.
- 815. The American president
could soon run out of patience
- 816. and if they join the war
on England's side,
- 817. we will be defeated.
- 818. There are no rules in war.
- 819. And making England
starve to death is worth the risk.
- 820. Hmm...
- 821. But if you send this,
- 822. it will mitigate the risk.
- 823. Are you sure?
- 824. Yes, my kaiser.
- 825. Get me Zimmermann.
- 826. Zimmermann, telegraph the following.
- 827. Send this immediately.
- 828. Use the kaiser's top-level encoding.
- 829. Gentlemen,
- 830. we have a priority-one intercept.
- 831. Whatever you're doing, cease now.
- 832. We need this code cracked pronto.
- 833. - Tea?
- 834. Good job, Rita.
- 835. This code is what
the kaiser has been using.
- 836. It must be unbelievably important.
- 837. Can you break it?
- 838. One! Two! Three! Four!
- 839. I'll need a lot more information.
- 840. Keep your eye on the enemy!
- 841. Aim rifles to the left!
- 842. Fire!
- 843. Thank you.
- 844. What makes the grass grow?
- 845. Blood! Blood! Blood!
- 846. What're you gonna do?
- 847. Kill! Kill! Kill!
- 848. Here's your tea.
- 849. Quick! March!
- 850. Mmm-hmm. Ja.
- 851. I am using the cipher.
- 852. Is the eight a "Z" or is it an "R"?
- 853. Godspeed to you all.
- 854. And remember...
- 855. "Dulce et decorum
est pro patria mori."
- 856. What does that mean?
- 857. "It's sweet and proper
to die for one's country."
- 858. Direct from Germany.
- 859. Thank you.
- 860. Ja. I am using the cipher.
- 861. Is the eight a "Z" or is it an "R"?
- 862. A "Z." Thank you.
- 863. I've cracked the code.
- 864. It's from Arthur Zimmermann,
the German Secretary of State in Berlin
- 865. to their ambassador in Mexico City.
- 866. He proposes an alliance with Mexico.
- 867. Germany wants to divert
- 868. so they're asking Mexico
to invade America.
- 869. In print, there.
- 870. So, when President Wilson sees this,
then he has no choice but...
- 871. He has to enter the war.
- 872. And the war will be over.
- 873. Well done. Oh, my dear Polly.
- 874. Well done, you.
- 875. You are incredible.
- 876. And there's hope for Conrad.
- 877. Well done, Oxford.
- 878. My idiot cousin, the kaiser,
- 879. has finally shot himself in the foot.
- 880. You've hit a six
with this telegram, old boy.
- 881. Kitchener would be proud.
- 882. Well, I think champagne is in order.
- 883. Uh, thank you, Your Majesty,
but I vowed not to drink
- 884. until Conrad has returned
safely from the war.
- 885. Why didn't you mention that earlier?
- 886. I'll make sure the only action
your boy sees
- 887. is sharpening the general's pencils.
- 888. I'm not sure that's cricket.
- 889. Orlando, you know how many
boys' lives you've saved
- 890. with this telegram?
- 891. At least let me save one.
- 892. So,
- 893. now that Conrad's safety is assured...
- 894. to peace in our time.
- 895. To peace in our time.
- 896. King George is waiting
for your response, Mr. President.
- 897. But how can this telegram be real?
- 898. Not even the Germans
would be this stupid.
- 899. - But, sir...
- I'm not doing a damn thing
- 900. till I have undeniable proof.
- 901. Douglas.
- 902. Statesman on the rocks, please.
- 903. Lieutenant Oxford reporting
for duty, sir.
- 904. Ah, yes. Oxford.
- 905. Lucky man. You've been
assigned back to London.
- 906. Sir, there must be some mistake.
- 907. No. Fortune favors the brave,
- 908. or those under the king's gaze.
- 909. Sir.
- 910. Attention!
- 911. Lance corporal.
- 912. - Sir.
- What's your name?
- 913. Lance Corporal Reid, sir.
- 914. Follow me.
- 915. Shola, I presume.
- 916. Yes.
- 917. Conrad has sent me to see the duke.
- 918. And your name, sir?
- 919. Good question.
It's a complicated answer.
- 920. I can only tell the duke in person.
- 921. Well, I still need a name.
- 922. This is gonna sound stupid.
- 923. But according to Conrad,
- 924. You're Merlin,
- 925. and I'm requesting an audience
with King Arthur.
- 926. Follow me, sir.
- 927. "Doubts persist
as to telegram authenticity."
- 928. "Worried Wilson won't go to war."
- 929. Idiots and fools.
- 930. There's nothing left to debate.
- 931. Polly, do you think
we can extend our network
- 932. to the White House?
- 933. Most of their household staff
were trained in England,
- 934. so it shouldn't be a problem.
- 935. Right. Well, let's get to work, then.
- 936. - I'll get on to it right away.
- Thank you.
- 937. Yes, come in.
- 938. Your Grace. We have a visitor.
- 939. Who is it?
- 940. A friend of Conrad saying he's Lancelot,
- 941. asking to see King Arthur.
- 942. What?
- 943. That brings back fond memories.
- 944. Um...
- 945. Show him in, would you?
- 946. Yes, sir.
- 947. Sir.
- 948. Who are you?
- 949. Lance Corporal Reid
of the Black Watch, sir.
- 950. So then why are you wearing
a Grenadiers officer's uniform?
- 951. This, uh...
- 952. This will explain it better than I can.
- 953. It's a wee bit surreal, sir.
- 954. Hmm.
- 955. Odd.
- 956. It's a letter from Conrad.
- 957. You're Lancelot.
- 958. Dear Father.
I, too, can play games.
- 959. I've swapped places with Archie Reid,
- 960. the man in front of you.
- 961. Archie?
- 962. - He's a good man...
- Yes, sir.
- 963. Who is simply following my orders
- 964. and is possibly as confused as you are.
- 965. Please ensure my actions
- 966. don't get him into any trouble.
- 967. Tomorrow I finally fulfill
my wish to go to the front.
- 968. And in the meantime, I enclose a poem
- 969. which I thought you might appreciate.
- 970. "Bent double..."
- 971. "like old beggars under sacks..."
- 972. "Knock-kneed, coughing like hags..."
- 973. "We cursed through sludge..."
- 974. "Till on the haunting flares
we turned our backs..."
- 975. "And towards our distant rest
began to trudge."
- 976. "Men marched asleep."
- 977. "Many had lost their boots,
but limped on..."
- 978. "Blood-shod."
- 979. "All went lame, all blind."
- 980. "Drunk with fatigue..."
- 981. "Deaf even to the hoots..."
- 982. "Of tired outstripped five-nines"
- 983. "that dropped behind."
- 984. New lads.
- 985. Welcome to the front line.
- 986. This trench will be your home
for the next six...
- 987. I don't bloody believe it. Runner!
- 988. Come on, lads!
- 989. Well, come on, lads! Cover the man!
- 990. Cover the man!
- 991. Fire!
- 992. Keep running!
- 993. Hold your fire!
- 994. Good effort, men.
- 995. This war never stops surprising me.
- 996. A German wavin' a Union Jack!
- 997. Allow me
to answer that, Sergeant Major.
- 998. Fall in!
- 999. That runner was actually a British spy.
- 1000. He was bringing me vital information.
- 1001. Our country needs what he was carrying,
- 1002. and I therefore need six volunteers.
- 1003. You will accompany me
to retrieve what's left of him
- 1004. as soon as it's dark.
- 1005. Very good, lad.
- 1006. Who else?
- 1007. Sergeant?
- 1008. You five. One step forward. March!
- 1009. Five more brave volunteers, sir.
- 1010. Excellent. We move out at midnight.
- 1011. Hold your fire.
- 1012. If they hear us from the trenches,
we'll be fired upon from both sides.
- 1013. Boom.
- 1014. Please...
- 1015. Please don't.
- 1016. I'm so sorry.
- 1017. What was that?
- 1018. It's over there.
- 1019. Don't shoot!
- 1020. No!
- 1021. Cease fire!
- 1022. First time out here, lad?
- 1023. Hey. Whoa, whoa, whoa.
- 1024. Same side.
- 1025. Thank God for the Union Jack, eh?
- 1026. I can honestly say that my first time
- 1027. was worse than losing this leg.
- 1028. I'm so sorry, I shouldn't
be the one crying.
- 1029. Come over here and help me out.
- 1030. Come here. Come on.
- 1031. I thought... I thought I knew
what I wanted.
- 1032. My father warned me.
- 1033. My father warned me.
I... I didn't listen...
- 1034. and now it all makes sense.
- 1035. I didn't even get to say goodbye.
- 1036. Well, I suggest we solve
both our problems, yeah?
- 1037. Look.
- 1038. I need to get this to high command.
- 1039. The contents could help
end this bloody war.
- 1040. As I won't be walking any time soon,
- 1041. I suggest you finish the mission
- 1042. and go home to a hero's welcome.
- 1043. No, no. No. Off we go
to a hero's welcome.
- 1044. It's okay. I've got you.
- 1045. Shit. Hurry!
- 1046. Covering fire!
- 1047. Give them cover, lads!
- 1048. Fucking move!
- 1049. Take out the machine gunner!
- 1050. Cover him!
- 1051. Go!
- 1052. Run!
- 1053. - Let's go, man! Run!
- Run! Run! Run!
- 1054. You all right? You all right?
- 1055. Jesus Christ! You were amazin'!
- 1056. I've never seen anything like it.
- 1057. What the bloody hell were you doing
over there in the first place?
- 1058. You better ask him. Ask him.
- 1059. He'll explain everything.
- 1060. He took the full force
of that blast, sir.
- 1061. Yeah. But at least
you made it back, son.
- 1062. I tell you, if that ain't worth
a Victoria Cross,
- 1063. I don't know what is.
- 1064. I must carry on the mission.
- 1065. We need to get this
to high command immediately.
- 1066. I'll take you there myself.
What's your name, soldier?
- 1067. Archie. Lance Corporal Archie Reid.
- 1068. Archie Reid, did you say?
- 1069. Yes.
- 1070. That's right.
- 1071. Lance Corporal Archie Reid?
- 1072. Dog Platoon, First Battalion,
the Black Watch?
- 1073. Aye.
- 1074. Is that your best Scottish accent?
- 1075. You're not Archie Reid.
- 1076. Lance Corporal Archie Reid's
a friend of mine.
- 1077. And I've been looking for him all night.
So who are you?
- 1078. Yes, yes. You're right.
There's a simple explanation.
- 1079. - I'm not Archie Reid.
- Fuckin' German spy.
- 1080. I'm Conra...
- 1081. Your son was killed in action, sir.
- 1082. What?
- 1083. Polly.
- 1084. Polly.
- 1085. My son.
- 1086. Why?
- 1087. "If in some smothering dreams..."
- 1088. "You too could pace"
- 1089. "Behind the wagon
that we flung him in..."
- 1090. "And watch the white eyes
writhing in his face..."
- 1091. "His hanging face,
like a devil's sick of sin..."
- 1092. "If you could hear, at every jolt..."
- 1093. "The blood, come gargling
from the froth-corrupted lungs..."
- 1094. "Obscene as cancer..."
- 1095. "Bitter as the cud..."
- 1096. "Of vile, incurable sores
on innocent tongues..."
- 1097. "My friend..."
- 1098. "You would not tell
with such high zest..."
- 1099. "To children ardent for..."
- 1100. "Some desperate glory..."
- 1101. "The old Lie..."
- 1102. "Dulce et decorum est..."
- 1103. "Pro patria mori."
- 1104. It is sweet and proper
- 1105. to die for one's country.
- 1106. I, Nikolai Aleksandrovich Romanov,
- 1107. Emperor of Russia,
- 1108. do hereby declare
my irrevocable determination
- 1109. to renounce the throne for myself
- 1110. and my descendants
- 1111. through this instrument of abdication...
- 1112. immediately.
- 1113. Hurrah! Hurrah! Hurrah!
- 1114. The documents Conrad recovered
- 1115. turned out to be
the German ambassador's
- 1116. original handwritten telegram
that I cracked.
- 1117. It's the concrete proof America needed.
- 1118. America will now
have to join the war.
- 1119. Conrad succeeded where we all failed.
- 1120. My Shepherd.
- 1121. There is a code of honor
- 1122. and using a distraction
to your own advantage
- 1123. breaks that code.
- 1124. - What?
- Apologies, my Shepherd,
- 1125. but I have disturbing news.
- 1126. While your plan for Russia
has been a great success,
- 1127. my plan to keep America
out of the war has backfired.
- 1128. The American president
- 1129. is about to be given the actual telegram
- 1130. I forced the kaiser to send.
- 1131. Such undeniable proof
- 1132. could provoke the Americans
into entering the war.
- 1133. En garde.
- 1134. I like a man who will admit
to his mistakes, I do.
- 1135. But I like more a woman
who can fix them.
- 1136. Have our American friend Dupont
- 1137. get Mata into the White House.
- 1138. Time for you to work your magic
- 1139. on the president, Mata.
- 1140. Now, go on.
- 1141. It's time to show the president
- 1142. who the real boss is.
- 1143. Will Your Grace be having tea?
- 1144. It's scotch time.
- 1145. Twenty-four hours a day.
- 1146. For the last time,
- 1147. I don't want any fucking tea!
- 1148. Neither do I.
- 1149. Sir.
- 1150. Though it looks like you could
use a strong one to sober up.
- 1151. I'm afraid it'll take
more than that, sir.
- 1152. Oh, well, maybe this will do the trick.
- 1153. Russia's pulled out of the war.
- 1154. The British Empire
faces imminent defeat.
- 1155. America still refuses to join.
- 1156. I personally telephoned
- 1157. He didn't deign to receive my call.
- 1158. Hmm. So, they got to him as well.
- 1159. - Indeed.
- 1160. The kaiser's blockade is working.
- 1161. The people are hungry.
- 1162. The next revolution might be here.
- 1163. I've even been advised
to change my German surname
- 1164. Saxe-Coburg to Windsor.
- 1165. More English.
- 1166. I'm afraid, then, sir,
- 1167. that England is doomed.
- 1168. I wanted to give you this.
- 1169. For Conrad.
- 1170. A true hero.
- 1171. A man who knew his duty.
- 1172. Enough of this self-pitying poppycock.
- 1173. If it were just you...
- 1174. you and I, in our grief,
I'd say do as you will.
- 1175. Drown in drink, and I'd join you.
- 1176. But he's watching.
- 1177. And he would have been
such a better man.
- 1178. But he can't.
- 1179. He won't be that. Not anymore.
- 1180. So, you must, in his stead,
- 1181. be the man your son would have been.
- 1182. Regretfully, I can no longer
remain in your service.
- 1183. Forgive me, my lady.
- 1184. My heart is broken as well.
- 1185. Polly. Polly.
- 1186. I do not accept your resignation.
- 1187. But...
- 1188. I will accept a very strong cup of tea.
- 1189. Looking better, Your Grace.
- 1190. Feeling better, Polly.
- 1191. So, what have I missed?
- 1192. We followed your last sober order
- 1193. and extended our network
to the White House.
- 1194. The president's butler informed us
- 1195. that since receiving
the telegram Conrad recovered,
- 1196. the president hasn't been himself.
- 1197. This may be the proof I asked for.
- 1198. But remember my election promise.
- 1199. Out of the war, not in.
- 1200. Douglas, get me a Statesman
on the rocks, now!
- 1201. Constantly engaged
- 1202. in top-secret conversations
with his embassy in London.
- 1203. And ignoring all advice to go to war.
- 1204. And do we have someone in the embassy?
- 1205. Of course.
- 1206. Mr. President...
- 1207. I don't know how to proceed.
- 1208. We're meeting to discuss
her new demands.
- 1209. - I see.
- She was very convincing.
- 1210. And she suggests we make
an unannounced visit at 3:00.
- 1211. Right, well. We had better
get a move on, then.
- 1212. Good afternoon.
- 1213. Please inform the ambassador
- 1214. the Duke of Oxford is here to see him.
- 1215. Yes, Your Grace.
- 1216. Mr. Ambassador.
- 1217. Why did you kill my friend?
- 1218. It was the alcohol.
- 1219. I was overcome.
- 1220. Thank you for your time,
- 1221. Hmm.
- 1222. If you wouldn't mind...
- 1223. I'm sorry. I couldn't help
admiring your scarf.
- 1224. An exquisite cashmere.
- 1225. Yes, it's very rare.
- 1226. Hmm. Do you know the test
of a truly pure cashmere?
- 1227. - A ring.
- 1228. Yet, happily, you do not wear one.
- 1229. You are
- 1230. mistaken.
- 1231. Now that
- 1232. is disappointing.
- 1233. But this
- 1234. is not.
- 1235. I believe it's ungentlemanly
to hurt a woman,
- 1236. but since the fate of the world
- 1237. hangs in the balance,
I'm going to bend the rules.
- 1238. Now tell me who's behind this,
- 1239. or so help me,
you'll never breathe again.
- 1240. You will have to kill me.
- 1241. Ah... Ambassador.
- 1242. - Is she dead?
- 1243. She has an extreme case of hypoxia.
- 1244. She'll be fine, and so will you,
- 1245. as long as we have
an honest conversation.
- 1246. What you're lookin' at
- 1247. is the lady you strangled.
- 1248. She filmed herself
seducing the president
- 1249. and is now blackmailing us
- 1250. to not even think
about entering the war.
- 1251. We cannot risk the integrity
of the U.S. presidency.
- 1252. I'm sure.
- 1253. Now, if we can get that negative,
- 1254. then we will happily join England
- 1255. and put Germany out of business.
- 1256. Well, I suggest you interrogate her.
- 1257. And I'll follow up on this.
- 1258. This is cashmere from the Kamaliro goat.
- 1259. It's very rare.
- 1260. Where does it come from?
- 1261. Mr. Collins,
cashmere book number one, please.
- 1262. Thank you.
- 1263. It comes from here.
- 1264. The only place in the world
- 1265. where the Kamaliro goat breeds.
- 1266. Excellent. Shola,
- 1267. we're going into the cashmere business.
- 1268. I can see six men guarding the lift.
- 1269. Ah...
- 1270. If you can call it that.
- 1271. Give the word and their numbers
will be reduced.
- 1272. Oh, no, Polly.
- 1273. The film's negative
is going to be up there.
- 1274. And that's our real prize.
- 1275. If these guards are alerted,
then I don't think we'll make it up.
- 1276. It's vital that we control this lift.
- 1277. This is called a parachute.
- 1278. It means that one can jump
out of a plane safely.
- 1279. So,
- 1280. tomorrow at dawn I'll fly
the plane over the mountain
- 1281. and Shola will jump out.
- 1282. You land with the parachute,
- 1283. take control of the lift,
and then you fire this flare.
- 1284. It's a signal to me,
- 1285. by which time
I'll have landed the plane,
- 1286. made my way over
to the bottom of the lift,
- 1287. while Polly provides cover.
- 1288. Sir, I could do anything for you,
- 1289. but I cannot jump out of an airplane.
- 1290. And it's not that I wouldn't try,
- 1291. it's that I know I'd let you down.
- 1292. Yes. Well, I appreciate
your fear of heights,
- 1293. but I am the only one who can fly.
- 1294. But you wouldn't have to land the plane.
- 1295. You just have to land yourself.
- 1296. Hmm. Well, it, um...
- 1297. It would be bad form to ask
a man to do something
- 1298. that I wouldn't do myself.
- 1299. All right, Shola,
get ready for my signal.
- 1300. We go at dawn.
- 1301. Whoa.
- 1302. Oh...
- 1303. Shit!
- 1304. Oh!
- 1305. Shh. That's it. That's it.
- 1306. Answer the question, Dupont.
- 1307. Do you know where Mata is?
- 1308. No. I...
- 1309. Well, you fuckin' should.
- 1310. Because I sent her
to the American Embassy,
- 1311. and she hasn't been seen since!
- 1312. Do you see this?
- 1313. If the American president
thinks he can fuck me too,
- 1314. he is very much mistaken.
- 1315. Take this negative to the press,
- 1316. and it will ruin his reputation.
- 1317. War will be the last thing
on the Americans' mind.
- 1318. And when the scandal is over,
- 1319. make sure the new president
is in our pocket!
- 1320. Go on. Run! Run!
- 1321. All the way to the White House.
- 1322. Let's check the other side.
- 1323. Let's go around to the south.
- 1324. Make it snappy, pal!
- 1325. Hey!
- 1326. What the hell?
- 1327. Buddy, what's the holdup?
- 1328. Look!
- 1329. There's the signal.
- 1330. Get to the lift. I'll cover you.
- 1331. Up on the hill!
- 1332. Who the hell is that guy?
- 1333. Shola! Stop fuckin' about!
Get on that counterweight!
- 1334. Oh, fuck!
- 1335. Oh...
- 1336. Thank God you're here.
- 1337. This plan hasn't exactly gone
by the numbers.
- 1338. Polly. Do you have the film?
- 1339. I have the negative
in my hand, Your Grace.
- 1340. Well done.
- 1341. So we have what we came for.
- 1342. Yes. But the cause of all this mayhem
is still in there.
- 1343. Enough of dealing with tentacles, Shola.
- 1344. It's time to cut off the head.
- 1345. It's good to have you back, sir.
- 1346. You have got to be
fucking kidding me.
- 1347. The thorn in my side
- 1348. has just been
a peace-loving English rose.
- 1349. The Duke of Oxford.
Good day to you, sir!
- 1350. You are the very symbol
- 1351. of everything I'm tryin' to destroy.
- 1352. Aristocrats like you
- 1353. stole my parents' mill
in Scotland when I was a lad.
- 1354. Entitlement has "title" in it
for a reason, no? Huh!
- 1355. I'm gonna fucking love killing you.
- 1356. Come to papa, you posh prick!
- 1357. I'm out.
- 1358. The sound of silence.
- 1359. It's my understanding that you, Duke,
- 1360. are a formidable swordsman.
- 1361. What say we end this shite as gentlemen?
- 1362. After all,
- 1363. manners maketh man.
- 1364. A gentleman does not hide
in the shadows.
- 1365. Aye.
- 1366. Surprise.
- 1367. Morton.
- 1368. You see,
- 1369. a little misplaced trust
- 1370. allows one to get away with murder.
- 1371. This debate should happen
after we have won the war.
- 1372. I suggest we go to Russia,
and we sort it out ourselves.
- 1373. And in poor Kitchener's case,
- 1374. quite literally.
- 1375. Spoken like a true traitor.
- 1376. As far as I'm concerned, his blood...
- 1377. That's on your grubby hands.
- 1378. Two on one?
- 1379. Behaving like a true gentleman.
- 1380. You're delusional.
- 1381. And you've killed millions.
- 1382. What say one more, for good measure?
- 1383. Hey!
- 1384. Come on, old man.
- 1385. Get up.
- 1386. I said, get up!
- 1387. Fuck this gentleman shite.
- 1388. Fuck's sake.
- 1389. You bastard.
- 1390. Give my regards to dear old Kitch, yeah?
- 1391. You can't do it. You can't let me fall.
- 1392. It goes against your every belief.
- 1393. You are a pacifist.
- 1394. And I'm now completely reliant
- 1395. on your mercy, old boy.
- 1396. You're right. I shouldn't let you fall.
- 1397. Only now I have become the man
that my son would have been.
- 1398. You...
- 1399. Sir.
- 1400. Shola, are you all right?
- 1401. We've been through worse, Your Grace.
- 1402. So, you'd jump
in front of a bullet for me,
- 1403. but not out of an airplane?
- 1404. So it would seem.
- 1405. Thank you, my friend.
- 1406. My pleasure.
- 1407. - So, Shola.
- 1408. How are we going to get down from here?
- 1409. Come in.
- 1410. Mr. President, Chef has made
your favorite peanut butter cookies.
- 1411. Thank you.
- 1412. Oh...
- 1413. Get me the generals, immediately.
- 1414. We're goin' to war!
- 1415. This victory is all down to you
- 1416. and your fine son, Conrad.
- 1417. And the courage of so many others, sir.
- 1418. Of course.
- 1419. Britain thanks you. And I thank you
- 1420. for ensuring that
I didn't meet the same fate
- 1421. as my cousins.
- 1422. Wilhelm's abdication was understandable,
- 1423. but what happened to Nicholas...
- 1424. Was despicable.
- 1425. It was, sir.
- 1426. I owe you a great personal debt
- 1427. that I still have my crown.
- 1428. In that case,
- 1429. would you meet me tomorrow
at Kingsman, 3:00?
- 1430. - A tailor shop?
- Yes, sir.
- 1431. Number 11, Savile Row.
- 1432. All of us here today are united,
- 1433. sadly, in losing our sons and friends
- 1434. in this terrible war.
- 1435. What happened to this
generation of young men
- 1436. must never happen again.
- 1437. I believe the terms
of Versailles are too onerous,
- 1438. too extreme, and could
precipitate another war.
- 1439. What the world needs is an organization
- 1440. that can channel its resources
- 1441. towards preserving peace
and protecting life.
- 1442. An independent intelligence agency
- 1443. operating at the highest level
- 1444. above the politics and bureaucracy
- 1445. of government-run spy organizations.
- 1446. To that end,
- 1447. I have acquired this shop.
- 1448. And I propose that we become
the founding members of
- 1449. the Kingsman agency.
- 1450. My code name will be...
- 1451. Arthur.
- 1452. And if you agree to join me,
- 1453. you may turn over your place card,
- 1454. where you will find your own code name.
- 1455. I am Galahad.
- 1456. I am Lancelot.
- 1457. I am Bedivere.
- 1458. I am Percival.
- 1459. Excellent.
- 1460. And this is Merlin,
- 1461. who will be our quartermaster.
- 1462. May our sons and friends rest in peace.
- 1463. And long live the Kingsman.
- 1464. The Kingsman.
- 1465. Your body
- 1466. Moves like a river
through a house of stone
- 1467. So softly
- 1468. Like a shadow never comes undone
- 1469. You can never know
- 1470. Your destiny
- 1471. Or what the mirror shows you
- 1472. Isn't real
- 1473. Only you can
- 1474. Truly understand
- 1475. The measure of a hero
- 1476. Is the measure of a man
- 1477. The measure of a man
- 1478. Nobody
- 1479. Sees the man behind the face you show
- 1480. Nobody
- 1481. Feels the burden that is yours alone
- 1482. You can never know
- 1483. Your destiny
- 1484. Or what the mirror shows you
- 1485. Isn't real
- 1486. Only you can
- 1487. Truly understand
- 1488. The measure of a hero
- 1489. Is the measure of a man
- 1490. Now it's time to address
the balance of my new flock.
- 1491. Thanks to you, Comrade,
our left hand is strong.
- 1492. But as you once said,
- 1493. our right hand now needs strengthening.
- 1494. Come in.
- 1495. Don't be shy.
- 1496. Come, come.
- 1497. My Shepherd.
- 1498. This young man will come to rival
- 1499. your position in this world, my friend.
- 1500. It is an honor, Comrade Lenin.
- 1501. And your name?
- 1502. Adolf Hitler.