1. I did what I could.
I don't think I did so badly.
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2. The best football player of all time
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3. Hi, Patrizia.
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4. That's me. Who are you?
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5. What do you mean, who am I?
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6. I'm San Gennaro.
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7. - How do you know my name?
- I told you, I'm San Gennaro.
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8. You're waiting for the 412 bus, right?
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9. It'll never come,
you could be waiting for hours.
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10. You want a lift?
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11. We can take you home if you like,
Luigino Serra and I.
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12. A pleasure, Luigino Serra.
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13. No, thanks. I'll catch the bus.
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14. You can't have children, can you?
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15. Get in.
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16. On the way, I'll explain how you can have
a child with your husband…
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17. …Franco.
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18. Let's go, Luigino.
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19. Where are we going?
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20. We're stopping by my house,
so I can explain it to you better.
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21. Jesus!
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22. The Little Monk!
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23. Yes, that's him all right,
the Little Monk.
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24. Come here, Little Monk.
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25. Now, Patrizia, bend over
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26. and kiss the Little Monk's head.
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27. For good luck.
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28. There!
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29. Now you can have
all the children you want…
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30. My pretty Patrizia.
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31. It's 10pm. Where've you been?
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32. Wait…
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33. You won't believe it,
but the bus was two hours late.
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34. You did it again.
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35. You did it again? Whore!
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36. Come over here!
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37. I'll bash your head in!
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38. - Letch!
- Whore!
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39. Come here!
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40. You locked the door?
C'mon, I'm not gonna hurt you.
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41. I'm not gonna hurt you!
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42. Open up!
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43. Hurry, Marì, Franco wants to kill me.
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44. - Slow down, sweetie.
- Don't worry, Mama.
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45. I'm falling off!
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46. What happened?
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47. The whore did it again.
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48. She was selling herself again!
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49. That's not true! I met San Gennaro.
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50. He took me to the Little Monk,
he's the one who gave me the money.
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51. He told me that
I can get pregnant now.
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52. That's why I was late.
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53. Piece of shit! I did it for you!
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54. Saverio, did you see
my sister has a bloody nose?
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55. Go and get a wet cloth.
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56. You can pack it in as well.
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57. Marì, I swear to God,
it was the Little Monk.
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58. Patrizia, please, stop.
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59. Whore!
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60. Whore!
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61. I'll go and talk to him.
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62. Whore, whore and whore!
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63. Franco, you've got to stop.
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64. She's a whore.
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65. She's not a whore, she's sick,
even the psychiatrist said so.
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66. Being childless sent her over the edge.
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67. - She's depressed.
- She's a whore.
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68. But Uncle…
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69. …what if she really saw the Little Monk?
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70. Keep saying shit like that,
you'll be kicked out of school.
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71. The baroness is such
a pain in the arse.
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72. Mama, have you ever seen
the baroness's house?
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73. Sure, when her husband was alive,
I went often.
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74. Since he died,
she hasn't let anyone in.
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75. - What's the house like?
- Weird.
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76. And her husband?
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77. Signor Attilio, a good man,
a famous gynaecologist.
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78. She treated him like a doormat.
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79. She'd only let him go out
for 20 minutes on Saturdays.
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80. She'd fill out the gambling slip
and he'd go and place the bet.
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81. Fabiè, wake your brother up,
he's got university.
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82. Marchino, get up,
you've got to go to class.
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83. - Daniela, out.
- No.
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84. Come out, I've got to go to work
and Fabietto's got to go to school.
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85. - Is your brother up?
- No, he was out till four.
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86. - What are you doing?
- Cutting my nails.
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87. - Can't you cut them in your room?
- No.
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88. - Where did you get your attitude from?
- From you!
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89. Papa, you think Maradona will come?
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90. No way, he'd never
leave Barcelona for this shithole.
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91. He won't come!
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92. See? Your sister even learns stuff
locked in that toilet.
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93. A little bird tells me
you're building a chalet in Roccaraso.
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94. A chalet! More like a two-room flat.
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95. With a yard! You're making good money.
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96. My late husband
wanted a house in the mountains.
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97. I told him he'd end up in a skip
if he did something so foolish.
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98. Humanity is dreadful,
didn't they tell you?
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99. No, nobody told me anything.
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100. Have you met
your sister-in-law's boyfriend?
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101. - We will on Sunday, in Agerola.
- Agerola's such a shithole.
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102. - The air is clean.
- All shitholes have clean air.
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103. Is that Baroness Focale?
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104. - She looks just like John Paul II.
- You're right.
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105. But the Pope is sexier.
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106. Let me see. You look good, I like it.
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107. Goodbye, sweetie.
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108. Your neighbour went
to that wedding on Saturday.
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109. How was it?
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110. The way she tells it,
it was like Charles and Diana's.
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111. "Incredible, enchanting,
elegant, captivating."
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112. - Nice!
- Nice? Vulgar is more like it.
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113. A wedding on Procida Island?
Just imagine.
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114. I could understand Capri, but Procida…
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115. I don't believe her, but she says
that Franco Zeffirelli was there.
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116. He kissed her hand and said,
"What a beautiful lady!"
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117. Why don't you believe her, Baroness?
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118. Zeffirelli bats for the other team.
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119. Imagine him kissing
that ghastly Graziella!
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120. - You really dislike her.
- She and her whole family put on airs.
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121. Just because they're
from the north of Italy.
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122. Those idiots think
they're Austro-Hungarian!
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123. We're from the Kingdom of Naples!
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124. Don't make fun of me.
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125. Oh Madonna! Just a second.
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126. What's she doing?
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127. Let's go.
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128. Lovey-dovey nonsense!
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129. My husband liked that too,
but I told him in rhyme,
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130. "Attiliuccio, let me be clear,
I'm a drill instructor, dear."
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131. - I'm going, I'm bored.
- I'll bring your lunch?
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132. Leave it at my door
and tap the broom five times.
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133. Bye.
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134. See ya.
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135. Do you need to make a confession?
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136. Antò, can you see them?
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137. Not yet, Uncle.
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138. Fly, Dieghito…
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139. - Piece of shit.
- Stop!
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140. Piece of shit!
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141. Would you pass me the peaches in wine?
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142. Look at your mama,
she's goading Signora Gentile.
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143. She likes making her say rude words.
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144. Everybody knows Signora Gentile
is the meanest woman in Naples.
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145. And who's got her as an in-law? Me.
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146. - Is she cold?
- No, she's just showing off her fur coat.
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147. - You're dripping all over yourself.
- Fuck off!
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148. Why don't you come and join us?
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149. Because you people are scum!
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150. What pleasantries
is Signora Gentile saying?
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151. In a most poetic outburst,
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152. she says she holds us all
in the highest regard.
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153. Why didn't Daniela come?
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154. She was in the bathroom.
We waited for her for two hours.
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155. - Auntie, can you juggle the oranges?
- Of course, sweetheart!
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156. Auntie Maria!
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157. Go, Maria!
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158. She never stops.
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159. How the hell does she do it?
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160. Uncle Alfredo's wife is here.
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161. - Austera!
- The scientist has arrived!
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162. Will you stop being an arsehole?
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163. Austera, don't pay any attention to him.
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164. - Everything okay?
- My spleen's playing up.
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165. - Did you go for a jog?
- I've never jogged in my life.
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166. What are you working on
in your mysterious lab?
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167. You won't believe it,
but my team and I
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168. are close to finding the cure for cancer.
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169. Nenè, you haven't even tried the peppers.
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170. Of course not, I'm doing "Witch Watch".
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171. What's that?
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172. She means Weight Watchers.
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173. She's already lost almost 8 pounds.
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174. Lose another 130
to match Pavarotti's weight!
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175. Shut the hell up.
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176. Don't listen to her.
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177. Riccardino, can you see them?
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178. Not yet, Uncle.
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179. - Antò, see anything?
- Not a thing.
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180. Have any of you seen
our sister's boyfriend?
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181. Luisella says he's handsome.
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182. I highly doubt that.
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183. Our sister's always been pig-ugly
and a real idiot.
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184. Please, even if you don't like him,
don't start with your shit.
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185. Luisella is 42.
Who knows how she found this moron?
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186. "Lucean carriere zitellesche innanzi",
said the great poet.
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187. It's his classical education,
can't you tell?
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188. - You look great, Mammì.
- Fuck off!
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189. Here I am. Did you miss me?
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190. Terribly!
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191. Austera, have you found
a cure for Geppino?
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192. There's no hope for him.
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193. How's the watermelon?
My veterinarian friend gave it to me.
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194. - Be honest, though.
- It's good.
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195. - How big an idiot is Geppino?
- Huge. You know what he does?
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196. He turns a blind eye
when the vet clinics get inspected.
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197. In exchange,
he gets watermelons and champagne.
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198. - And even a fur for his mother.
- Absolutely!
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199. Sooner or later, he'll end up in prison.
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200. - Riccardino, you see them?
- Nothing.
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201. - Antò?
- Not yet.
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202. Silvana, what do you know
about Luisella's new boyfriend?
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203. Only his name, Aldo.
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204. What does he do for a living?
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205. You're not telling the truth, you know!
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206. - Marchino, she knows.
- I dunno.
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207. - How's your acting career going?
- Don't go on about that.
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208. He's got an audition with Fellini.
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209. It's not an audition,
Fellini's just looking for extras.
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210. - He's seeing 4,000 people.
- It's still an audition.
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211. - Antò?
- Still The Desert of the Tartars.
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212. Antonio's studying classics too?
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213. - Mammì, want some chilled watermelon?
- Piss off, stop fucking with me.
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214. Stop laughing, you idiot.
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215. I think Pelé and Di Stefano
are better than Maradona.
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216. When did you all become
such disappointments?
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217. Why are you so sure of yourselves?
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218. Stick to eating and drinking,
that's all you know how to do.
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219. My friend who owns a bar in Turin
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220. said Agnelli has agreed a deal
with Maradona.
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221. - Don't say that in front of Alfredo.
- I don't believe it.
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222. Agnelli has coffee there every morning
and he confided in him.
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223. Yeah, Agnelli drinks coffee
at your friend's bar!
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224. What a load of rubbish!
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225. Do you really think Maradona
will come and play for Napoli?
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226. It's all shit they make up
to sell newspapers.
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227. Ferlaino is a stingy chairman.
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228. I know him well,
he comes to the bank a lot.
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229. Fabiè, if Maradona
doesn't come and play for Napoli,
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230. I'll kill myself.
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231. You understand?
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232. I'll kill myself.
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233. Look!
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234. - They're here!
- He's crippled!
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235. What do you mean?
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236. - He must've hurt himself.
- Give me the binoculars.
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237. What is he, a war veteran?
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238. He's got a gammy leg.
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239. He's really ugly.
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240. He's ugly as shit!
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241. Pleased to meet you.
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242. I'm Aldo Cavallo,
retired Venetian police officer,
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243. amateur pastry chef,
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244. and official fiancé
of your sister-in-law, Luisella Schisa.
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245. My intentions are very serious.
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246. You too?
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247. Why are you all such disappointments?
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248. - I wouldn't know.
- Ignore him.
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249. Our uncle's a lawyer.
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250. He's grown a little cynical
after losing 18 consecutive lawsuits.
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251. It's a pleasure, I'm Aldo Cavallo,
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252. retired Venetian police officer,
amateur pastry chef,
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253. and official fiancé
of your sister, Luisella Schisa.
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254. - My intentions are very serious.
- What intentions?
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255. I want to marry her
and make her happy for all eternity.
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256. Let's aim for Christmas!
You're 80 years old.
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257. - Saverio!
- He's always joking.
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258. I'm 70, I don't drink, I don't smoke.
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259. I exercise every morning.
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260. - I'm still a vigorous young man.
- A handsome young man!
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261. We have to introduce Aldo
to Signora Gentile.
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262. No, please!
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263. Instead, to celebrate their engagement,
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264. how about we go swimming
off my new boat?
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265. - Coming, Uncle Alfredo?
- Geppino, the sea…
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266. - It's a disappointment.
- He can't swim.
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267. - Signora Gentile, will you come with us?
- Go suck a sausage!
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268. What did she say about sausages?
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269. Mama says to offer you a snack.
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270. Let's go, then.
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271. So…
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272. In honour of our much-loved Eduardo,
who resided here,
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273. I'll recite for you, my beloved Maria,
Si t'o sapesse dicere.
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274. Then place a very fine mesh sieve
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275. over the mixing bowl,
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276. add the flour and corn flour.
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277. Then sift!
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278. That's the secret
the world has forgotten.
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279. "I want to be with you eternally."
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280. You have to sift well, my dear.
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281. Sorry, I'm a bit hot,
do you mind if I take a dip?
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282. Of course not, my love.
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283. Down she goes!
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284. The whale has submerged.
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285. Your classical education is ruining you.
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286. So, Signora Patrizia,
I was telling Luisella
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287. how to make a sponge cake.
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288. It's not an easy recipe, of course.
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289. As I was saying,
sifting is so misunderstood.
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290. Will you show me
your little voice gadget?
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291. Certainly.
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292. She's crazy.
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293. Crazy and a whore.
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294. Oh my God!
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295. They're chasing the cigarette smugglers
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296. and won't stop till
they've dumped all the goods.
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297. The officers can't touch them then.
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298. He really knows how to drive that boat!
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299. Fabietto, can you bring me a towel?
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300. You've grown so big, Fabiè.
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301. What's he saying?
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302. That they have to go and buy batteries.
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303. Don't look at me.
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304. There's nothing to see.
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305. I talked with Nennella.
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306. There's some hot gossip.
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307. - Now what?
- Sizzling hot!
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308. Like what?
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309. Aldo gave Luisella
some hot pink stockings.
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310. Don't make me throw up!
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311. Come and look at the house.
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312. - Where's Daniela?
- Where do you think? In the bathroom.
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313. The fireplace will go here.
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314. Fireplace?
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315. I've always wanted
a house with a fireplace.
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316. Do you think Diego will come?
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317. - No, I don't.
- I do.
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318. So…
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319. How hot was Aunt Patrizia today?
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320. Stark naked.
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321. On a scale of one to a hundred?
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322. A billion.
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323. If you had to choose…
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324. between Maradona coming to Napoli
and screwing Aunt Patrizia…
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325. …which would you choose?
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326. Maradona.
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327. You're pretty good.
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328. What do you want? Get lost!
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329. So, how did it go?
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330. Awful.
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331. He said I have a conventional face,
I asked what that meant,
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332. and he said,
"You look like a waiter from Anacapri."
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333. So, Marchino, what did he say?
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334. He said I have a conventional face…
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335. Stefania.
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336. My dear Antonella.
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337. Agnese, Luisa, Giusy.
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338. Elisabetta…
Elisabetta's never around.
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339. Not her, the one to the left.
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340. Camille, Celine,
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341. Eleonore, Florence.
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342. Petra… Not her, the voluptuous one!
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343. Geltrude, Inga…
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344. Fanny… what a beauty. Fanny!
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345. Olimpia.
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346. Rosa.
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347. Oh my God!
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348. Sofia, Margot.
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349. Odille.
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350. Dolores.
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351. Esmeralda.
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352. - What else did Fellini say?
- Nothing.
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353. At one point, a journalist called.
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354. Fellini says to him,
"Cinema's not good for anything."
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355. "But it's a distraction."
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356. The journalist must've asked him,
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357. "A distraction from what?"
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358. And Fellini says, "From reality."
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359. "Reality is lousy."
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360. That's all he said?
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361. Isn't that enough?
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362. It's him!
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363. Papa, listen to me, I swear.
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364. Do you like it?
It's a lithograph by Guttuso, one of us.
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365. I swear it was Maradona, ask Marchino.
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366. Bullshit! Read this.
"No Napoli for Maradona."
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367. - How did the audition go?
- Don't ask.
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368. The audition! I forgot about that.
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369. - Tell him it was Maradona.
- It did look like him.
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370. - What did you rent?
- Once Upon a Time in America.
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371. The one with De Niro?
We'll watch it later.
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372. Signora Pichler? Oh, good evening.
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373. This is Maestro Zeffirelli's assistant.
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374. The maestro tells me
that you crossed paths at a wedding.
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375. He was very taken
with your radiant and lively face.
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376. That's how he described it.
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377. The maestro is working
on a new film, about Callas.
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378. He is looking for a leading lady
and he would like to see you.
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379. Could you possibly come to Rome?
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380. Why don't we buy a TV
with a remote like everyone else?
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381. Don't talk nonsense, I'm a communist.
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382. - Did you go to the toilet?
- Daniela's in there.
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383. Friends!
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384. Fabulous news!
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385. Zeffirelli's assistant called Graziella.
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386. He wants her to star in his next film.
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387. Hooray, Graziella!
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388. Well done!
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389. Congratulations!
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390. - What's going on?
- Fabulous news!
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391. Graziella is going to star
in Zeffirelli's next film.
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392. - She's going to play Callas!
- How did you know it's Callas?
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393. I read it in Gente.
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394. Graziella, get ready for an Oscar!
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395. Don't forget about us
when you get to Hollywood.
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396. I'll never forget about you.
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397. You delivered that line so well.
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398. Let's get home now!
What if Zeffirelli calls back?
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399. I heard the phone ringing! Hurry!
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400. We'll celebrate on Saturday!
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401. Saturday it is!
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402. I won't go to the premiere,
it'll be tacky.
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403. I'm going, I'm bored.
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404. Goodbye, Baroness!
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405. What an incredible story.
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406. Incredible, is it?
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407. Will you ever
stop playing practical jokes?
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408. You're gonna kill her.
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409. She'll never know it was me.
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410. Yes, she will.
Because you're gonna tell her.
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411. We're communists.
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412. We're honest to the core.
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413. I'm not going by myself.
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414. You Neapolitans!
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415. You Neapolitans!
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416. It's not true what people say,
that you're all nice.
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417. You're mean.
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418. That's what you are!
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419. I never want to see you again.
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420. Don't you dare eat any of those canederli.
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421. Don't move.
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422. Hello?
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423. Did your husband talk to you?
Copy !req
424. What do you want, bitch?
Copy !req
425. He hasn't talked to you yet?
Then tell him he should.
Copy !req
426. You leave that whore now!
Copy !req
427. You promised me
you wouldn't see her any more!
Copy !req
428. Who's she talking about?
Copy !req
429. Signora Villa, Papa's colleague.
They've been together for years.
Copy !req
430. I can't, you know
the situation's complicated!
Copy !req
431. Daniela! Get out of there!
Copy !req
432. No, you get out!
Copy !req
433. Let's go back to bed.
Copy !req
434. Fabietto!
Copy !req
435. Don't think about it.
Copy !req
436. Think about Aunt Patrizia.
Copy !req
437. Think about Maradona.
Copy !req
438. What the fuck…
Copy !req
439. I can't stop.
Copy !req
440. Hello?
Copy !req
441. Pass me that whore.
Copy !req
442. Okay, bye.
Copy !req
443. It was Filippo Anzalone.
Copy !req
444. My colleague from the bank.
Copy !req
445. He was working late,
dealing with the paperwork.
Copy !req
446. He wanted to tell me right away.
Copy !req
447. Tell you what?
Copy !req
448. 13 billion in bank guarantees.
Copy !req
449. Napoli bought Maradona.
Copy !req
450. We've got to tell Uncle Alfredo
right away.
Copy !req
451. Mother of God!
Copy !req
452. Happy birthday, Fabiè!
Copy !req
453. - Have you been here before?
- When I was little.
Copy !req
454. What are you doing for your birthday?
Going out with friends?
Copy !req
455. I'm not coming home tonight.
Copy !req
456. We can't celebrate together.
Mama's pissed off.
Copy !req
457. - The situation's…
- I don't have friends.
Copy !req
458. - How about a girlfriend?
- Yeah, right…
Copy !req
459. Look, you'll have a girlfriend soon
Copy !req
460. and this misery
will be a thing of the past.
Copy !req
461. But follow my advice.
Copy !req
462. For your first time, take whatever comes.
Copy !req
463. Even a total dog is okay.
Copy !req
464. Just get your first time
out of the fucking way.
Copy !req
465. Here, your birthday present.
Copy !req
466. Stand B seats, of course.
Copy !req
467. - Thank you, God!
- Don't thank God.
Copy !req
468. I'm the one
who bought you a season ticket!
Copy !req
469. Signora Maria!
I'll help you with those.
Copy !req
470. Thanks, Mario.
Copy !req
471. - How's your papa?
- My papa loves me.
Copy !req
472. Today I had some tests done.
Dad's got high cholesterol.
Copy !req
473. Mario, what did you just do?
Copy !req
474. I wanted to make you laugh.
Copy !req
475. See that column?
Copy !req
476. I spent the entire war leaning against it.
I was younger than you.
Copy !req
477. Then one day Luigino,
the son of the doorman,
Copy !req
478. came over to get me.
Copy !req
479. - And he took you far away?
- No, he brought me here.
Copy !req
480. To Piazzetta Serao.
Copy !req
481. What was here?
Copy !req
482. A 50-year-old woman.
Copy !req
483. For a little sugar or anything to eat,
Copy !req
484. she'd kiss us on the mouth.
Copy !req
485. And since we were all different ages,
Copy !req
486. she set out some bricks
for the different heights.
Copy !req
487. Ingenious.
Copy !req
488. Women are always ingenious.
Copy !req
489. So, Luigino did take me far away.
Copy !req
490. I saw your mother for the first time
there on Via Roma.
Copy !req
491. She was running to the bomb shelter.
Copy !req
492. She was late, she was worried.
Copy !req
493. She was young.
Copy !req
494. And she was beautiful.
Copy !req
495. She still is.
Copy !req
496. Yes.
Copy !req
497. She still is.
Copy !req
498. You sure you only want a bowl
of zuppa di latte for your birthday?
Copy !req
499. Want me to cook you something special?
Copy !req
500. Zuppa di latte is special.
Copy !req
501. It reminds me of when I was little.
Copy !req
502. Papa would be in Milan for work
and you wouldn't feel like cooking.
Copy !req
503. We'd have zuppa di latte
and you'd let me sleep in your bed.
Copy !req
504. Maybe he wasn't really in Milan.
Copy !req
505. What do you want to do
when you leave school?
Copy !req
506. Philosophy.
Copy !req
507. What's that about?
Copy !req
508. I don't really know.
Copy !req
509. I kicked him out because I had to.
I'll let him come home in a few days.
Copy !req
510. Where would he go anyway, to her?
She can't even make zuppa di latte.
Copy !req
511. Where else does he have it so good?
Copy !req
512. I'll let him back in on Thursday so
we can take the furniture to Roccaraso.
Copy !req
513. The house is finally finished.
Copy !req
514. I made you tiramisu, want some?
Copy !req
515. - What about Marchino?
- We've lost him.
Copy !req
516. I saw him with a girl today,
she's beautiful.
Copy !req
517. Want to play hide and seek?
You used to hide in my wardrobe.
Copy !req
518. Mama!
I don't fit in the wardrobe any more.
Copy !req
519. You're right, you've grown too big.
Copy !req
520. Fabiè, I wanted to buy you a present.
Copy !req
521. But I forgot.
Copy !req
522. That's okay, Mario,
it's the thought that counts.
Copy !req
523. Good.
Copy !req
524. Bye, Fabietto!
Copy !req
525. What film is it? Is it Fellini?
Copy !req
526. No, some director
named Antonio Capuano.
Copy !req
527. Everyone wants to work with him.
Copy !req
528. Come on, move it!
Copy !req
529. - Hey, Julia.
- Hi, Gennaro.
Copy !req
530. Will you remind Capuano?
I'm at Galleria Toledo Theatre.
Copy !req
531. Don't worry, he said he'll come.
Copy !req
532. The show's great, it's going well.
Copy !req
533. Let me know.
Copy !req
534. Hello?
Copy !req
535. Who is it?
Copy !req
536. I've seen you before,
driving a smuggler's boat.
Copy !req
537. Could be. The sea's my life.
Copy !req
538. Diego scored! With a corner kick.
Copy !req
539. Armà, are we going?
Copy !req
540. - Your girlfriend?
- She's my sister.
Copy !req
541. If you like, we can go to a game together.
Copy !req
542. 287170, call me.
Copy !req
543. - Bye.
- Have a good afternoon.
Copy !req
544. Easy.
Copy !req
545. What was that?
Copy !req
546. There's something behind that bush.
Copy !req
547. - Probably a cat.
- Or a wolf.
Copy !req
548. A wolf?
Copy !req
549. Nonsense!
Copy !req
550. It's just a cat or a dog.
Copy !req
551. - That's a bear.
- Yeah, right, a bear in Roccaraso!
Copy !req
552. - I'm scared, I'm going inside.
- Me too.
Copy !req
553. Sir, you'd better come as well.
Copy !req
554. What a load of rubbish.
Copy !req
555. Kitty?
Copy !req
556. Good God!
Copy !req
557. Saverio, it's behind you!
Copy !req
558. Saverio!
Copy !req
559. The bear of Roccaraso
is coming to gobble you up!
Copy !req
560. Are you an idiot?
You gave me a heart attack.
Copy !req
561. You've got to stop
these damn practical jokes!
Copy !req
562. You were so good!
Copy !req
563. Terrific!
Copy !req
564. You, in the bear suit, I loved you!
Copy !req
565. "Kitty!"
Copy !req
566. You're an idiot.
Copy !req
567. - Did you hurt yourself?
- A lot.
Copy !req
568. Pass to Diego!
Copy !req
569. Damn!
Copy !req
570. Go!
Copy !req
571. He's shorter than the deli guy…
Copy !req
572. Good evening, are you Geppino Lettieri?
Copy !req
573. That's me, what's going on?
Copy !req
574. We're watching the game.
Copy !req
575. The game's over.
Copy !req
576. Maradona again, he tries to dribble…
Copy !req
577. He scored!
Copy !req
578. He's the best!
Copy !req
579. Are you stupid?
Copy !req
580. Mother of God!
Copy !req
581. What a player!
Copy !req
582. Maradona touched the ball with his hand.
Copy !req
583. I think it's a handball.
Here's the action replay.
Copy !req
584. Here's Valdano, who seems
to have ruined everything…
Copy !req
585. And he scores with his fist.
Copy !req
586. With his hand!
Copy !req
587. A god! He scored with his hand.
Copy !req
588. He has avenged
the great Argentine people,
Copy !req
589. oppressed by the ignoble imperialists
in the Malvinas.
Copy !req
590. He's a genius!
Copy !req
591. It's a political act.
Copy !req
592. A revolution.
Copy !req
593. He humiliated them, you understand?
Copy !req
594. He humiliated them.
Copy !req
595. The goal was scored with his hand.
Copy !req
596. Where the fuck is Silvana?
Copy !req
597. She went to buy tartufi ice cream.
Copy !req
598. Yummy!
Copy !req
599. What a shitty world this is.
Copy !req
600. You go and buy dessert
and when you get back,
Copy !req
601. your husband's in prison.
Copy !req
602. It's your fault!
Copy !req
603. It's your fault they arrested my son.
Copy !req
604. You knew he was cheating
and you didn't stop him.
Copy !req
605. Cos you only care about one thing.
Copy !req
606. Money!
Copy !req
607. Ludovica, can you
get off the bike for a sec?
Copy !req
608. Signora Gentile,
Copy !req
609. you're a real pain in the arse!
Copy !req
610. Filthy bitch!
Copy !req
611. Luisella, sweetheart.
Copy !req
612. It's a criminal offence.
Copy !req
613. Stop.
Copy !req
614. Maradona has the ball.
Copy !req
615. The Argentine team strikes again.
Copy !req
616. Maradona runs past two opponents,
Copy !req
617. he has the ball… Maradona scores!
Copy !req
618. Magnificent goal by Maradona!
This one scored completely with his feet.
Copy !req
619. There were no hands.
Magnificent goal by Maradona,
Copy !req
620. which counts for this one
and the one before!
Copy !req
621. You sure you don't want to
come to Roccaraso?
Copy !req
622. We play Empoli tomorrow. I can't miss it.
Copy !req
623. Diego's expecting me.
Copy !req
624. There's some gnocchi in the fridge.
Copy !req
625. "Then hunger proved
a greater power than grief."
Copy !req
626. Sometimes I don't understand you.
Copy !req
627. Watch out for the bear.
Copy !req
628. Fabiè!
Copy !req
629. - We've got to go to Roccaraso.
- What happened?
Copy !req
630. Mama and Papa are in hospital.
Copy !req
631. Name's Schisa. We're their sons.
Copy !req
632. What happened?
Copy !req
633. Wait just a moment.
Copy !req
634. Just a minute, boys. Just a minute.
Copy !req
635. I knew it…
Copy !req
636. There was…
Copy !req
637. …a carbon monoxide leak
at your parents' house.
Copy !req
638. Your mother died there
and your father here at the hospital.
Copy !req
639. That's it?
Copy !req
640. That's all?
Copy !req
641. Your father, before he died,
said something.
Copy !req
642. What?
Copy !req
643. "Marì, no practical jokes."
Copy !req
644. You have to let me see them.
Copy !req
645. It's better if you don't.
Copy !req
646. You have to let me see them.
Copy !req
647. You have to let me see them!
Copy !req
648. You have to let me see them!
Copy !req
649. They're unrecognisable.
You'd be alarmed.
Copy !req
650. You have to let me see them!
Copy !req
651. You have to let me see them.
Copy !req
652. Let me see them!
Copy !req
653. Let me see them!
Copy !req
654. Matteo, I forgot something.
Wait here for me.
Copy !req
655. Fuck face.
Copy !req
656. Why aren't you crying?
It'll do you good.
Copy !req
657. "If you don't weep now,
when will you weep?"
Copy !req
658. - Daniela didn't come?
- Course she did.
Copy !req
659. - Where is she?
- She went to the toilet for a minute.
Copy !req
660. And Aunt Patrizia?
Copy !req
661. She's not well.
Copy !req
662. She's in hospital,
in the psychiatric ward.
Copy !req
663. Go and visit her sometime.
Copy !req
664. It'll make her happy.
You always were her favourite.
Copy !req
665. "Through me the way
into the suffering city."
Copy !req
666. "Through me the way into eternal pain."
Copy !req
667. "Through me the way
that runs among the lost."
Copy !req
668. Why weren't you at Roccaraso?
Copy !req
669. You like to ski.
Copy !req
670. Napoli played at home.
Copy !req
671. I had to see Maradona.
Copy !req
672. It was him!
Copy !req
673. He's the one who saved you!
Copy !req
674. Who?
Copy !req
675. It was him!
Copy !req
676. It was the hand of God!
Copy !req
677. Don't you want to be an actor any more?
Copy !req
678. Filmmaking is too hard.
Copy !req
679. I'd have to go to Rome.
Copy !req
680. What do you call what Maradona just did?
Copy !req
681. A free kick?
Copy !req
682. No.
Copy !req
683. It's called perseverance.
Copy !req
684. And I'll never have it.
Copy !req
685. So you'd better have it, Fabiè.
Copy !req
686. Fabietto?
Copy !req
687. Have you cried?
Copy !req
688. I can't.
Copy !req
689. What are you gonna do now?
Copy !req
690. Maybe I'll watch…
Copy !req
691. Once Upon a Time in America.
Copy !req
692. Wait for me to come out
and we can watch it together.
Copy !req
693. Okay.
Copy !req
694. When are you coming out of the bathroom?
Copy !req
695. I don't know.
Copy !req
696. You know why Papa
never left Signora Villa?
Copy !req
697. No, I don't.
Copy !req
698. They had a son eight years ago.
Copy !req
699. When were you gonna tell me?
Copy !req
700. When you were bigger.
Copy !req
701. Which is when?
Copy !req
702. Now.
Copy !req
703. You're bigger now.
Copy !req
704. Thanks.
Copy !req
705. Come on, let's go.
Copy !req
706. It's time.
Copy !req
707. How are you?
Copy !req
708. I can't cry.
Copy !req
709. Don't worry.
Copy !req
710. It means it's not the right time.
Copy !req
711. What do you want to be when you grow up?
Copy !req
712. I'm embarrassed to tell you.
Copy !req
713. Anyway, it'll never happen.
Copy !req
714. It's a crazy idea.
Copy !req
715. If it's crazy,
you're talking to the right person.
Copy !req
716. A film director.
Copy !req
717. That's what I want to be.
Copy !req
718. What a great idea!
Copy !req
719. If you make it, will you come and get me?
Copy !req
720. That way… I'll be your muse.
Copy !req
721. You already are my muse.
Copy !req
722. Do you remember
when you came to my house?
Copy !req
723. You, your papa and your mama.
Copy !req
724. That time Uncle Franco hit me.
Copy !req
725. Yes.
Copy !req
726. I remember every single time
I've ever seen you.
Copy !req
727. Yeah, I know.
Copy !req
728. That night, Uncle Franco and I made up.
Copy !req
729. We made love.
Copy !req
730. And you know what?
Copy !req
731. I got pregnant.
Copy !req
732. A week later,
Uncle Franco and I fought again.
Copy !req
733. I had a miscarriage.
Copy !req
734. I got by on pills.
Copy !req
735. But then I couldn't take it any more.
Copy !req
736. So I said, "Bring me here
Copy !req
737. or I'll kill myself."
Copy !req
738. Remember when you said
you saw the Little Monk?
Copy !req
739. I believed you.
Copy !req
740. What is it, Baroness?
Copy !req
741. Fabietto,
Copy !req
742. a bat flew into the living room.
Copy !req
743. Can you get rid of it?
Copy !req
744. I can try.
Copy !req
745. Thank you, Fabietto.
Copy !req
746. Is that your husband?
Copy !req
747. The famous gynaecologist?
Copy !req
748. The bat's in here.
Copy !req
749. I'm in my room, Fabietto.
Copy !req
750. Now sit down.
Copy !req
751. How are you?
Copy !req
752. Do you miss your parents?
Copy !req
753. What a shitty question!
Copy !req
754. You're right, it's a shitty question.
Copy !req
755. Mama said you treated
your husband like a doormat.
Copy !req
756. It's not enough
to overhear a few quarrels.
Copy !req
757. Truth is,
Copy !req
758. you never know what's going on
in other people's homes.
Copy !req
759. - Do you still think about your husband?
- Attiliuccio?
Copy !req
760. No, I've forgotten him.
Copy !req
761. You'll forget your mother and father too.
Copy !req
762. No.
Copy !req
763. I'll never forget them.
Copy !req
764. It's time to look to the future.
Copy !req
765. I'm going.
Copy !req
766. Fabietto?
Copy !req
767. If you don't mind,
Copy !req
768. could you bring me the brush
from my dresser?
Copy !req
769. One last favour,
Copy !req
770. would you brush my hair?
Copy !req
771. Are you looking at me?
Copy !req
772. Yes.
Copy !req
773. Okay, Fabietto, that's enough.
Copy !req
774. Why did you put it down?
Copy !req
775. - I've finished.
- Not quite yet.
Copy !req
776. You still have to brush my slit.
Copy !req
777. What do you mean, your slit?
Copy !req
778. This is my slit.
Copy !req
779. Go on, brush it.
Copy !req
780. Attiliuccio, who knew his way around,
called it "the super pussy".
Copy !req
781. Now put down the brush
Copy !req
782. and get on top of me.
Copy !req
783. Don't look at me,
bury your face in my shoulder
Copy !req
784. and think about a girl you like.
Copy !req
785. Okay.
Copy !req
786. Now tell me, what's her name?
Copy !req
787. - Patrizia.
- Good.
Copy !req
788. Now you have to do two things.
Copy !req
789. Move this way inside me…
Copy !req
790. …and call me Patrizia.
Copy !req
791. You have to imagine the programme,
Copy !req
792. because you can't change the channel now.
Copy !req
793. Patrizia!
Copy !req
794. Smoke this.
Copy !req
795. It's the best part of sex.
Copy !req
796. Now go.
Copy !req
797. I really liked it. Next time…
Copy !req
798. Next time will be
with a girl your own age.
Copy !req
799. I accomplished my mission.
Copy !req
800. What was your mission?
Copy !req
801. To help you look to the future.
Copy !req
802. We're thinking of going to Stromboli
this summer.
Copy !req
803. Want to come?
Copy !req
804. We'll see.
Copy !req
805. You shagged someone.
Copy !req
806. You did!
Copy !req
807. Spartans!
Copy !req
808. When death comes for me,
Copy !req
809. I shall not be found.
Copy !req
810. - You were great.
- Well done, Julia.
Copy !req
811. I'm sorry, Capuano wanted to come,
but he couldn't make it.
Copy !req
812. - Did I do something wrong?
- No, not at all!
Copy !req
813. He's just busy editing his film.
Copy !req
814. So, he's not coming any more.
Copy !req
815. - Mate! What ya doing here?
- I was at the theatre.
Copy !req
816. I've not seen you at the stadium again.
Copy !req
817. I had some problems.
Copy !req
818. - Hop on.
- Where?
Copy !req
819. On the scooter! We'll grab a beer.
Copy !req
820. No, tomorrow I…
Copy !req
821. You don't have shit to do. Hop on.
Copy !req
822. Hold on, or you're gonna go splat.
Copy !req
823. - Nice place.
- It's a shithole.
Copy !req
824. But the birds are hot.
I've got a soft spot for hot birds.
Copy !req
825. - Where did that hottie come from?
- She's taken.
Copy !req
826. What the fuck do I care?
Copy !req
827. You get it, beautiful lady.
Copy !req
828. What?
Copy !req
829. He said, "Your mother's a whore."
Copy !req
830. No, he asked what you want.
Copy !req
831. I've got ears, he said,
"Your mother's a whore."
Copy !req
832. You said, "Your mother's a whore."
Copy !req
833. You called my mum a whore!
Copy !req
834. Armà, stop!
Copy !req
835. Wasn't expecting that. Let's scarper!
Copy !req
836. - Yeah, but with dignity.
- Fuck dignity!
Copy !req
837. I was so scared!
Copy !req
838. Naples is so beautiful from here.
Copy !req
839. What's your name again?
Copy !req
840. Fabietto Schisa.
You're a smuggler, right?
Copy !req
841. Yeah, but just for now.
I want to pilot offshore boats.
Copy !req
842. - And you?
- Maybe cinema.
Copy !req
843. You want to open a cinema?
Copy !req
844. Awesome, I've got this guy
who can get you some fast cash.
Copy !req
845. - I'm afraid of falling off.
- Nobody falls with me.
Copy !req
846. And…
Copy !req
847. I've never seen anyone
kick someone with flip-flops.
Copy !req
848. That's because you don't know me!
Copy !req
849. Get off.
Copy !req
850. Come with me.
Copy !req
851. Where are we going?
Copy !req
852. We are going to Capri, to dance.
20 minutes and we're there.
Copy !req
853. To Capri?
Copy !req
854. Yeah, to Capri!
Just shut up and have fun!
Copy !req
855. I have some stuff to do tomorrow.
Copy !req
856. Tomorrow you've got to sleep.
Copy !req
857. Tonight we're going dancing. Hold on.
Copy !req
858. I'm gonna show you something cool.
Copy !req
859. Awesome!
Copy !req
860. You know what sound an offshore boat
makes going 200 km an hour?
Copy !req
861. No, what?
Copy !req
862. You're crazy.
Copy !req
863. I'm not crazy, I'm young.
Copy !req
864. Aren't you?
Copy !req
865. We messed up, should've gone to Ischia.
Copy !req
866. Capri's totally dead,
I thought some places'd still be open.
Copy !req
867. Just as well.
I don't even know how to dance.
Copy !req
868. Khashoggi!
Copy !req
869. Who the fuck's that?
Copy !req
870. The richest man in the world.
Copy !req
871. Wait for me.
Copy !req
872. And she's… Wait, what's her name?
Copy !req
873. What are you looking at?
Copy !req
874. I was just trying to remember your name.
Copy !req
875. Eat shit.
Copy !req
876. Let's go for a dip.
Copy !req
877. You know what we've become tonight?
Copy !req
878. No, what?
Copy !req
879. Friends.
Copy !req
880. When we're back in Naples,
you can meet my sis.
Copy !req
881. You can't meet my ma,
cos I don't even know her.
Copy !req
882. My dad's in prison,
but I could meet your parents.
Copy !req
883. We can only do the first thing.
Copy !req
884. Why?
Copy !req
885. I'm an orphan.
Copy !req
886. - Armà, want to come to Stromboli?
- No, I can't. I've got stuff to do.
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887. Rinse off.
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888. Feola's waiting for you.
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889. Which animals, still living today,
have been around the longest?
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890. Crocodiles.
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891. No, what a shame!
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892. Why don't you stay another week?
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893. No. It was hard enough
getting this ferry ticket.
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894. Be careful.
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895. Of what?
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896. Of everything.
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897. Listen, Marchino…
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898. Mama and Papa aren't around any more.
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899. And we're not rich.
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900. We've got to figure out
what we want to do next.
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901. No, Fabiè…
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902. I don't want to think about it.
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903. It's summer, it's 9th August.
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904. I want to think about Gigliola,
about getting stoned, friends.
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905. I want to think about happiness.
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906. Don't you?
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907. Don't you?
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908. I…
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909. After what happened to Mama and Papa…
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910. I don't know if I can be happy.
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911. Come here.
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912. Have a safe trip.
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913. How are you getting on in here?
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914. Can't complain.
I even get to see my dad in the yard.
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915. How many years did you get?
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916. I've got to wait for the trial.
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917. Fifteen maybe, or ten.
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918. I don't want to talk about sad stuff.
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919. Then there's nothing to talk about.
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920. You pissed off?
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921. Orphans are always pissed off.
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922. Okay, fine, I've got a ma and a pa,
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923. but I'm kind of an orphan too.
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924. You feel alone, that's the problem.
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925. But don't forget that you're free.
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926. Free!
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927. Don't ever forget it.
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928. You know what sound
an offshore boat makes?
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929. No.
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930. You never wanted me
to kiss your mouth, Giovanni!
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931. Well, fine. I'll kiss it now.
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932. I'll bite it with my teeth
like one bites a ripe fruit!
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933. Giovanni, why won't you look at me?
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934. Your terrible eyes,
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935. so full of anger and contempt,
are closed now!
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936. Lift up your eyelids, Giovanni!
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937. Julia, cut!
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938. - Who said that?
- Me, Capuano.
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939. Cut, Julia.
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940. You've entered into
the ornamental, zero nuance.
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941. You're self-referential,
you're unravelling.
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942. One final note, we're tired of your shit.
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943. Bravo!
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944. You got the fuck off the stage!
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945. Now you deserve a round of applause.
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946. It's what they all wanted,
but they didn't have the courage.
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947. Capuano! I'm Fabietto Schisa.
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948. What the fuck do I care?
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949. - I'm a huge fan of yours.
- I fucking hate fans.
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950. I like conflict,
without conflict you don't progress.
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951. Without conflict, it's just sex
and sex is useless.
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952. Wait!
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953. You still here?
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954. - What are you looking at?
- Looking is all I know how to do.
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955. What d'ya want from me?
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956. What do I want? Everything!
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957. That really shocked me, I didn't know
you could protest at the theatre.
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958. You can't, but I do
whatever the fuck I want. I'm free.
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959. - Are you free?
- I'd prefer to answer later.
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960. - Do you have courage?
- A less difficult question?
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961. Remember, those without courage
don't sleep with beautiful women.
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962. Listen, Capuano…
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963. Now that my family has disintegrated,
I don't like life any more.
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964. I don't like it any more,
I want an imaginary life,
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965. just like the one I had before.
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966. I don't like reality any more.
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967. Reality is lousy.
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968. That's why I want to make films,
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969. even though
I've only seen three or four.
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970. Not enough, Schisa. It's not enough.
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971. Films…
Everyone wants to make fucking films!
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972. To make films, you've got to have balls,
do you have balls?
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973. I rather doubt it.
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974. So you need pain. You got that?
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975. Yes, I told you, on that front I'm fine.
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976. What did you tell me? What pain?
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977. No, you don't have pain, you have hope.
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978. With hope you make
comforting films, it's a trap.
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979. They left me alone, that's pain.
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980. It's not enough, Schisa! We're all alone.
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981. You're alone? I don't give a fuck,
because you're not original.
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982. Forget pain and think about fun,
that's how you'll make films.
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983. But you've got to have something to say.
You got something?
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984. Imagination, creativity are myths
that aren't worth shit.
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985. I dunno if I have something to say.
How do I know?
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986. How the fuck do I know!
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987. I've only got four things to say, and you?
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988. I want to go to Rome to see
if I'm cut out for making films.
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989. Rome? The great escape…
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990. Fucking distractions, in the end
you come back to yourself,
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991. you come back to failure,
everything's a failure, a pile of shit.
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992. No one can escape his own failure
and no one gets out of this city.
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993. Rome…
What the fuck you gonna do in Rome?
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994. Only arseholes go to Rome.
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995. Do you know how many stories
there are in this city?
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996. Look!
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997. Is it possible this city
doesn't inspire you at all?
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998. So, you've got something to say?
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999. Or are you an arsehole
like everyone else?
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1000. Got a story to tell?
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1001. Have some guts!
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1002. Got a story to tell or not?
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1003. C'mon, you fool!
Got a story to tell?
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1004. Find the guts to tell it! C'mon!
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1005. - Got a story to tell?
- Yes!
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1006. Then spit it out!
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1007. When my parents died
they didn't let me see them!
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1008. Don't come undone, Fabio.
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1009. - Everyone calls me Fabietto.
- It's time they started calling you Fabio.
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1010. Don't come undone.
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1011. What does that mean?
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1012. You've got to figure it out yourself.
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1013. You've got to figure it out yourself,
you piece of shit!
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1014. Don't come undone, Schisa.
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1015. Don't ever come undone!
You can't allow that.
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1016. What does that mean? Why?
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1017. Because they didn't leave you alone.
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1018. No?
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1019. No!
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1020. They abandoned you.
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1021. Listen to me, don't go to Rome.
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1022. Come and see me, I'm always here.
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1023. We'll make films together!
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1024. You wanted to greet
these marvellous fans personally.
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1025. What did it feel like, Diego?
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1026. The greatest thing in my life.
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1027. The match is over!
Napoli wins the Italian championship!
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1028. An incredibly exciting moment,
Napoli wins the Italian championship!
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1029. An incredibly exciting moment,
Napoli wins the Italian championship!
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1030. It's a thrilling moment…
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1031. It's a thrilling moment…
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1032. - Shall we go to Trastevere?
- I want to go out to eat.
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1033. - Shall we go to Trastevere?
- I wanna go out to eat.
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1034. - A nice carbonara.
- Cacio e pepe.
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1035. - A nice carbonara.
- Cacio e pepe.
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1036. - Excuse me, how much longer to Rome?
- One hour.
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1037. - Excuse me, how much longer to Rome?
- One hour.
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