- 1. In the last year of the World War,
the Tomainian nation began to weaken.
- 2. Behind her lines
revolution had broken out.
- 3. Her diplomats were frantically
suing for peace...
- 4. while at the front
Tomainia's army fought on...
- 5. confident its war machine
- 6. confident its war machine
would smash the enemy's lines.
- 7. Big Bertha, a cannon that could
hurl a projectile a hundred miles...
- 8. was this day to make
its first appearance on the Western Front...
- 9. was this day to strike terror
into the hearts of the enemy.
- 10. Seventy-five miles away was her target,
the cathedral of Notre Dame.
- 11. 95,452!
- 12. - Range: 95,452!
- Yes, sir!
- 13. - Stand clear!
- 14. Hey!
Stand by your trigger.
- 15. Yes, sir.
- 16. Range correction: 95,455!
- 17. - Range: 95,455!
- Yes, sir!
- 18. Breach secured!
- 19. Stand clear!
- 20. Ready! Fire!
- 21. Defective shell.
We'll examine it. Come on.
- 22. Come on.
- 23. - We'd better check the fuse.
- Yes, check the fuse.
- 24. Yes, sir. The fuse.
- 25. Look out! Come on! Run!
- 26. - What's that?
- An air raid!
- 27. - They're after Big Bertha!
- Right! To the antiaircraft gun!
- 28. - To the gun!
- 29. Hey! Have you gone crazy?
- 30. Come down out of there!
- 31. Get up there, will you!
- 32. What do you think you're doing?
Have you gone crazy?
- 33. - Sorry, sir -
- Sir! Report from Captain Snout!
- 34. The enemy have broken through!
Every man to the front!
- 35. Muster the gun crew, quick!
You, report to Sergeant Bloom.
- 36. - Come on!
- Yes, sir!
- 37. Get your hand grenades there, soldiers.
- 38. Come on there.
Get your hand grenades.
- 39. Hey, soldier! Where's your hand grenade?
Hey, come here!
- 40. - Where's your hand grenade?
- Haven't got any, sir.
- 41. Give him a hand grenade.
- 42. Keep moving. Come along.
- 43. Hurry it up.
Come along. Hurry up.
- 44. Pardon me, sir, but to work this -
How do you -
- 45. Pull the pin, count 10 and throw it.
- 46. Let 'em have it!
- 47. Hey, come on!
- 48. Hey, this is no time to scratch.
- 49. Here, pull yourself together.
- 50. Take this.
- 51. Forward!
- 52. Hey, you men! Fall in here!
- 53. Hey, you, come on!
Hurry it up there!
- 54. Order! Arms!
- 55. Prepare to attack!
- 56. Forward!
- 57. Captain!
- 58. Capitán!
- 59. There you are.
- 60. Oh, excuse me!
- 61. The enemy!
Come on, fellas! Let's get him!
- 62. Good afternoon, sir. May I come in?
- 63. - Who is it?
- 64. Come in.
- 65. - Sir.
- What division?
- 66. 21 st Artillery, sir.
- 67. Take this. Hold 'em off.
And keep firing.
- 68. - I'll be back in a moment.
- Yes, sir.
- 69. Help! Comrade, help!
- 70. - What is it?
- I'm exhausted.
- 71. Quick! Help me to my plane!
- 72. Yes, sir.
- 73. - Thank you, my lad.
- 74. I'll see you get
the Tomainian Cross for this.
- 75. That's all right, sir.
I'm only too willing to oblige.
- 76. Oh, you saved my life.
- 77. - Thank you.
- I'll strap you in.
- 78. I'm weak.
I can't make it alone.
- 79. - You'll have to stay with me.
- All right, sir.
- 80. - Can you fly a plane?
- I can try.
- 81. Quick! Lift my hand to the stick.
I haven't the strength.
- 82. - Take charge of that gun, Sergeant!
- Yes, sir!
- 83. The enemy! They're coming!
Quick! Lift my hand to the throttle!
- 84. We'll fool 'em!
- 85. - Here. Hold on to these dispatches.
- Yes, sir.
- 86. If we can deliver them to General Schmelloffel,
Tomainia may yet win the day!
- 87. - I think I'm going to faint.
- Oh, don't say that.
- 88. I'm sorry, old man.
- 89. - Huh?
- I'm sorry.
- 90. Oh, wait - Please! Hey!
- 91. Hey, mister!
- 92. - Hey!
- Where am I?
- 93. - Don't you know me?
- Oh, yes. Of course.
- 94. - Of course.
- 95. Yes, I - I feel better now.
- 96. - Ah.
- The blood's returning to my head.
- 97. What's below?
- 98. - Looks like the sun.
- The sun?
- 99. - Seems to be shining upwards.
- 100. - How's the gas?
- Terrible. It kept me awake all night.
- 101. No, no, no!
The gasoline in the tank!
- 102. Oh. Almost empty.
- 103. We must be nearly there.
What time is it?
- 104. Time?
- 105. About, approximately, one minute to 12:00.
- 106. Strange.
- 107. Look at that.
- 108. Seem to be defying
the laws of gravity.
- 109. Water!
- 110. - Huh?
- Quick! I'm going to faint!
- 111. Uh, wait a while. Wait a wh -
- 112. You'll get - We'll get into trouble
if you faint any more now.
- 113. - Ohh. Ohh.
- Now be careful.
- 114. - Here now. Just hold it.
- 115. Hold it. Hold it. I think I can - We'll just see -
- 116. Faint. Water.
- 117. - What on -
- Oh, water.
- 118. - Here, take it!
- Oh! Quick!
- 119. There's something wrong.
- 120. Oh, I can't reach it.
- 121. Oh, water! Faint!
- 122. Ah! Oh, it's all gone!
- 123. What's the matter?
- 124. - This belt is too tight.
- Well, loosen it.
- 125. I'm trying to.
- 126. We're upside down.
- 127. - I know it.
- Give me that stick!
- 128. Impossible.
- 129. Oh. There it goes.
- 130. We're out of gas.
- 131. Well, I suppose this is the end.
- 132. - Cigarette?
- Not now.
- 133. Then I shan't need this anymore.
- 134. What month is it?
- 135. April.
- 136. Spring in Tomainia.
- 137. Hilda will be in the garden now
tending the daffodils.
- 138. How she loves daffodils.
- 139. She would never cut them
for fear of hurting them.
- 140. It was like taking a life
to cut a daffodil.
- 141. Sweet, gentle Hilda.
- 142. A beautiful soul.
- 143. And she loved animals.
- 144. And little children too.
- 145. We've landed! Dispatches!
- 146. Comrade, where are you?
- 147. Comrade!
- 148. Comrade, the dispatches!
Tell me, where are they?
- 149. - Are you hurt?
- Quick! Take me to General Schmelloffel!
- 150. - What's that?
- Hurry, man!
- 151. If I don't deliver these dispatches at once,
- 152. - Well, the war's over.
- 153. - We lost.
- 154. Hynkel Party Takes Power!
- 155. Meanwhile, the Jewish soldier,
ex-barber, veteran of the World War...
- 156. suffered a loss of memory and remained an inmate
of the soldier's hospital for many years.
- 157. He was ignorant of the profound change
that had come over Tomainia.
- 158. Hynkel the dictator ruled the nation
with an iron fist.
- 159. Under the new emblem of the Double Cross
liberty was banished...
- 160. free speech was suppressed...
- 161. and only the voice of Hynkel was heard.
- 162. und ze sauerkraut!
- 163. Baloney.
- 164. Baloney -
- 165. Adenoid Hynkel has just said...
- 166. yesterday Tomainia was down,
but today she has risen.
- 167. Democratzy shtunk!
- 168. Democracy is fragrant.
- 169. Liberty shtunk!
- 170. Liberty is odious.
- 171. Free sprechen shtunk!
- 172. Freedom of speech is objectionable.
- 173. Tomainia has the greatest army in the world.
- 174. The greatest navy in the world.
- 175. But to remain great we must sacrifice.
- 176. We must tighten our belts.
- 177. Hail Hynkel!
- 178. Ah, Herring.
- 179. Bismarck Herring!
- 180. The Phooey now speaks to
the Field Marshal Herring, the minister of war.
- 181. From the hearten...
- 182. Und Garbitsch. Herr Garbitsch.
- 183. He is now addressing
Herr Garbitsch, Minister of the Interior.
- 184. Herr Garbitsch.
- 185. Herring shutten smelten fine
- 186. und Garbitsch shutten smelten fine
- 187. Herring und Garbitsch.
- 188. His Excellency
recalls the struggles of his early days...
- 189. shared by his two loyal comrades.
- 190. Ah, und the Aryan...
- 191. und the Aryan maiden -
- 192. Ah, the Aryan maiden.
- 193. Ah, the delicatessen mit ze schoe...
- 194. und the flaxen mit ze stress.
- 195. Ach, und the Holstein...
- 196. mit the muss.
- 197. Ah, ze muss!
- 198. Und der kinder Katzenjammer.
- 199. The Katzenjammer mit the...
- 200. Hail Soldiers for Hynkel!
- 201. Zein the Aryan...
- 202. und now der Juden.
- 203. Der Juden!
- 204. da sauerkraut mit the Juden.
- 205. Und da strangulation mit da...
- 206. Der Juden.
- 207. Ohh, der Juden.
- 208. His Excellency
has just referred to the Jewish people.
- 209. Und now...
- 210. Europe...
- 211. Blitzkrieg French...
- 212. and final straff und en France...
- 213. and straff mit eine Finland!
- 214. Und mine straff mit Russia...
- 215. Tomainia!
- 216. In conclusion, the Phooey remarks...
- 217. that for the rest of the world
he has nothing but peace in his heart.
- 218. We now pause for station identification.
- 219. This is the Peri-mutuel Network...
- 220. bringing you direct from Tomainia
Adenoid Hynkel's address...
- 221. to the sons and daughters
of the Double Cross.
- 222. The English Interpreter is Heinrich Schtick,
Adenoid Hynkel's personal translator...
- 223. who is apparently reading
from a prepared manuscript.
- 224. Stand by for further commentary.
- 225. Go ahead, Tomainia.
- 226. His Excellency is about to descend the stairs.
- 227. Ach! Ohh! Your Excellency!
- 228. Are you hurt?
- 229. Straff! Straff da fluten flavin
da cheesen cracken!
- 230. Da fluten da banana!
- 231. Da banana!
- 232. - Da banana!
- Da bitte booben!
- 233. - Banana!
- 234. Dein big booben!
- 235. Banana.
- 236. Inside, da booben.
- 237. You ride in the other car.
- 238. Thank you, children.
- 239. His Excellency seems well pleased...
- 240. as he's greeted by a committee
of Tomainian children and their mothers.
- 241. Now he pauses
before a woman with a child.
- 242. Camera.
- 243. Even the baby is thrilled...
- 244. and seems all smiles
at His Excellency's attention.
- 245. Hail Hynkel!
- 246. His Excellency leaves
the scene of his triumph...
- 247. and will return to the palace along
Hynkelstrasse, the avenue of culture...
- 248. where he will pass Tomainia's
- 249. The Venus of Today
and The Thinker of Tomorrow.
- 250. - How was it?
- The speech?
- 251. - Yes.
- Oh, very good.
- 252. Thought your reference to the Jews
might have been a little more violent.
- 253. - What?
- You've got to rouse the people's anger.
- 254. At this time, violence against the Jews
might take the public's mind off its stomach.
- 255. Hmm. Perhaps you're right.
- 256. Things have been quiet
in the ghetto lately.
- 257. Good morning, Mr. Jaeckel.
- 258. What's good about it?
- 259. Well, conditions could be worse.
- 260. If you think they could be worse,
you have a great imagination.
- 261. Aha. You heard Hynkel's speech.
- 262. I heard nothing.
I've got my own troubles.
- 263. Well, you're better off
than a lot of other people.
- 264. - What have you heard from the barber?
- Still in the hospital.
- 265. Aye. Ever since the war
he's been there.
- 266. Yep.
- 267. Why don't you try and rent
his barbershop for him?
- 268. He won't let me.
- 269. Every few weeks
he writes to say he's coming back.
- 270. It seems a pity it should be idle
all these years.
- 271. Well, why worry?
- 272. With the taxes the government
will soon take it away from him.
- 273. Aye, perhaps you're right.
- 274. It isn't such a good morning after all.
- 275. Now you said it.
- 276. - Hannah.
- Yes, Mr. Jaeckel?
- 277. On the mantelpiece
you'll find my tobacco pouch.
- 278. - Will you get it?
- All right, Mr. Jaeckel.
- 279. Yeah, seems everyone
is full of troubles.
- 280. Ah, everyone.
- 281. Look at Hannah, poor girl.
- 282. A hard worker.
Can't get a job.
- 283. Father was killed in the war.
Mother died last year.
- 284. Can't earn enough to pay the rent
for her room. What can I do?
- 285. I can't throw her out.
- 286. - You'll need some more tobacco.
- Where are you going?
- 287. I'm delivering Mrs. Shoemaker's laundry.
- 288. Oh, you'd better take the key.
- 289. Mrs. Jaeckel and myself
are going out.
- 290. I'm locking up all the doors...
- 291. in case the storm troopers will start
their monkey business again.
- 292. Look, fellas! Tomatoes!
- 293. And potatoes!
- 294. I think I'll take a box home.
- 295. Mister, please, please.
- 296. Hey, fellas, the truck!
- 297. Hold it there, will ya!
- 298. You have no right to do this.
- 299. That's all right.
Just charge it to my account.
- 300. Nice, ripe tomatoes, boys!
- 301. Why don't some of you do something?
I wish I was a man. I'd show ya.
- 302. Now what would you do,
my pretty maid?
- 303. Ah, you're very brave all together, but not
one of ya got guts to stand up alone and fight.
- 304. - Aw, shut up!
- Is that why you got a truck?
- 305. - To run away in case somebody hits you back?
- Shut up, or we'll take you down.
- 306. All right, come on and take me.
You'll get a lot of medals for it.
- 307. That's all you can do is to pick on women
and rob defenseless people.
- 308. Aw, don't rob the poor girl, boys.
Give her back her tomatoes.
- 309. Here!
- 310. Oh, I'll have to do it all over again.
- 311. Pigs.
- 312. - Send in patient 33.
- Yes, sir.
- 313. Here's an interesting case.
- 314. Amnesia. Jewish soldier.
- 315. Been here since the war.
Has an idea he's been here only a few weeks.
- 316. Has he any idea
what's happened in the meantime?
- 317. Not the least.
- 318. His one interest seems to be in his barbershop,
which he believes he left only a few weeks ago.
- 319. Poor devil. He'll have
many surprises waiting for him.
- 320. I'm afraid so.
- 321. - Yes?
- Number 33 is gone.
- 322. Gone?
But he was to be examined.
- 323. - I know, sir, but he disappeared.
- 324. Well, let him go.
It isn't a serious case.
- 325. Besides, there's little more
we can do for him.
- 326. Hey, go on.
Beat it up there.
- 327. Come on! Get outta -
You! Go on!
- 328. What do you think you're doing?
- 329. - I really don't know.
- Well, you leave that alone.
- 330. - Don't be silly.
- I'm not silly!
- 331. I appreciate that.
- 332. When you talk to me,
hail Hynkel and salute.
- 333. Who are you anyway?
- 334. I'll show you who I am.
- 335. Come down to headquarters.
- 336. - Say, that's my shop!
- I don't care if it is or not.
- 337. - You leave me alone!
- Oh! Gonna put up a fight, are ya?
- 338. Come on down, pal.
I'll show you.
- 339. Now let me tell you something -
- 340. Are you a policeman?
Arrest that man for assault.
- 341. - Come here, you!
- Leave me alone!
- 342. Attacking a storm trooper, huh?
- 343. - Take him down!
- You'll hear from my lawyer!
- 344. - Come on, you little -
- Why, you -
- 345. Turn him around!
- 346. He bit my finger!
- 347. Pardon.
- 348. Oh, I'm sorry, mister.
I didn't mean to hit you.
- 349. You were wonderful.
I enjoyed that.
- 350. - But don't stand there. You'd better beat it.
- No, I'll call a policeman.
- 351. - No, no, don't do that.
- Why not?
- 352. You crazy?
- 353. - Look out. There's more coming.
- More what?
- 354. Wait a minute!
- 355. Come in here!
- 356. What's wrong with you?
There's no use being foolhardy.
- 357. - Who?
- 358. Stop the car!
- 359. Hello! What's this?
Who hit you?
- 360. - I don't know. I think there were a gang of 'em.
- Here, you'd better go along, get fixed up.
- 361. We'll investigate later.
- 362. - What time is it?
- Come on. Get in.
- 363. I don't see what is -
- 364. It's all right now.
- 365. Thanks, mister.
- 366. That did me a lot of good.
- 367. You sure got nerve,
the way you fought back.
- 368. That's what we should all do -
- 369. We can't fight alone,
but we can lick 'em together.
- 370. We didn't do so bad, did we?
- 371. So long.
- 372. Oh, excuse me.
- 373. You're the barber,
the one that was in the hospital.
- 374. Mr. Jaeckel's often talked about you.
We didn't think you were ever coming back.
- 375. But the storm troopers,
they'll be looking for ya.
- 376. Storm troopers?
- 377. You'd better hide.
Wait. I'll get the key to the cellar.
- 378. - Is this the man?
- That's him.
- 379. Hail Hynkel.
- 380. Who's he?
- 381. Don't fool with me.
I said, hail Hynkel!
- 382. - All right.
- Put out your hands.
- 383. Just a moment. We won't put 'em on here.
Bring him outside.
- 384. Yes. Come on, you.
- 385. Before we take you down
you'll finish this. Here.
- 386. Go on. Paint that.
- 387. Why, you -
- 388. That's him!
- 389. Wait a minute, boys! Wait a minute!
- 390. I've got an idea.
A bright idea.
- 391. Sure! That's it!
- 392. - And... give it the works!
- Heave ho!
- 393. Wait a minute! Commander Schultz!
- 394. Attention!
- 395. First in command.
- 396. - Yes, sir.
- What the -
- 397. Second in command.
- 398. - Yes, sir.
- Oh, never mind.
- 399. - You!
- Yes, sir.
- 400. What the devil goes on here? And who
told you to hang people from lampposts?
- 401. - No one, sir.
- My orders were to keep these streets tidy.
- 402. - What was the trouble?
- A Jew was attacking storm troopers, sir.
- 403. - Where is he?
- 404. Break ranks.
- 405. Oh, so there you are.
Stand him up.
- 406. Get up.
- 407. You!
- 408. Don't you remember me?
- 409. The war.
You saved my life.
- 410. - Me?
- 411. And I always thought of you as an Aryan.
- 412. - I'm a vegetarian.
- Well, don't you remember?
- 413. The enemy tried to capture us,
but we got away in my plane.
- 414. Plane?
- 415. And then we crashed.
- 416. Cra -
- 417. Oh, yes.
- 418. Now I remember.
- 419. - Well, how are you?
- What has my friend done?
- 420. Our men were painting his windows,
Commander, and he resisted.
- 421. Any brave man would resist.
- 422. - I'm sorry this occurred.
- Oh. No harm.
- 423. I'm sure that in the future
you will not be molested again.
- 424. However, if you or your friends are ever
in any trouble, I hope you'll let me know.
- 425. Who did that?
- 426. Oh. One of my friends.
- 427. Oh. Of course.
- 428. Hynkel's palace was
the center of a gigantic enterprise...
- 429. an enterprise that would build
the world's greatest war machine.
- 430. Behind this undertaking was
the dynamic energy of Adenoid Hynkel...
- 431. whose amazing genius
ran the entire nation...
- 432. whose ceaseless activity kept him
busily occupied every moment of the day.
- 433. Hup!
- 434. Marshal Herring is waiting,
- 435. Enough.
- 436. Hail Hynkel.
- 437. Your Excellency,
I believe we've got something now.
- 438. A bulletproof uniform.
Material as light as silk.
- 439. - Where is it?
- I've arranged for a demonstration in the anteroom.
- 440. It will only take two minutes.
- 441. I can spare one.
- 442. - Professor Herr Kibitzen!
- Hail Hynkel!
- 443. Your Excellency,
actions speak louder than words.
- 444. - A bulletproof uniform!
- And 100% perfect!
- 445. Shoot.
- 446. Far from perfect.
- 447. Zevell!
- 448. - My secretary. Where is she?
- In the outer office, Your Excellency.
- 449. - Call her.
- Yes, sir.
- 450. Hail Hynkel.
- 451. Take a letter.
- 452. No! No, no!
- 453. - Hello?
- This is Field Marshal Herring.
- 454. I'm in the Tower Room.
We've got something marvelous.
- 455. All right. I shall be up.
- 456. - What is it?
- A parachute.
- 457. The most compact in the world.
Worn like an ordinary hat.
- 458. It will open in 25 feet.
- 459. Demonstrate, Professor.
- 460. Hail Hynkel!
- 461. Herring, why do you
waste my time like this?
- 462. Send Garbitsch here.
- 463. Herr Garbitsch is waiting, Your Excellency.
- 464. Enough.
- 465. Hail Hynkel.
- 466. Garbitsch, what's the meaning of this,
- 467. 25 million for prison camps when we need
every penny for the manufacturing of munitions.
- 468. - We've had to make a few arrests.
- A few? How many?
- 469. Nothing astronomical.
Five or ten thousand.
- 470. - Oh.
- A day.
- 471. - A day?
- Just a few dissenters, that's all.
- 472. - What do they dissent about?
- The working hours. The cut in wages.
- 473. Chiefly, the synthetic food -
the quality of the sawdust in the bread.
- 474. What more do they want? It's from
the finest lumber our mills can supply.
- 475. Nevertheless,
the condition is getting dangerous.
- 476. The people are overworked.
They need diversion.
- 477. The people? Bah!
- 478. We might go a little further with the Jews.
Burn down some of their houses.
- 479. Spectacular assault on the ghetto now
might prove diverting.
- 480. We must do something more dramatic.
Now is the time to invade Osterlich.
- 481. - How soon can we be ready?
- According to Herring, three months.
- 482. I can't wait that long. Besides, Napaloni's army
might invade Osterlich before me.
- 483. We must strike now.
- 484. In that case,
we should require foreign capital.
- 485. - Borrow it. Borrow it.
- The bankers have all refused.
- 486. But wait. There's one man
who might make us a loan - Epstein.
- 487. Epstein?
He's a Jew, isn't he?
- 488. Yes.
- 489. Well, let's be big about it.
We'll borrow the money from Epstein.
- 490. It might be difficult
in view of our policy towards his people.
- 491. Very well then.
We'll change our policy towards his people.
- 492. Tell Commander Schultz that in future
all persecution of the Jews must cease...
- 493. at least until
we've negotiated this loan.
- 494. I don't understand it.
- 495. The whole ghetto is so quiet now.
- 496. You can't imagine what was going on
while you were away.
- 497. Oh, this Hynkel business.
- 498. You weren't here.
You were in the hospital, unconscious.
- 499. Believe me, you don't appreciate
what a good time you were having.
- 500. Well, if things get worse
we can go to Osterlich.
- 501. That's still a free country.
- 502. Sooner or later we'll have to go.
- 503. - Excuse me.
- 504. it's nice to see you back.
- 505. It's like the old days again, eh?
- 506. - Yes.
- How's business?
- 507. Very slow. Very slow.
- 508. Trouble is, the men
are all in concentration camps.
- 509. You should go in
for fixing up the women.
- 510. Nice money
in the beauty parlor business.
- 511. You know anything about it?
- 512. Me? No.
- 513. Well, you can learn.
- 514. You can practice on Hannah.
- 515. Yes!
- 516. Of course.
Hannah, get up in that chair.
- 517. We are going to make you
- 518. Beautiful? What for?
- 519. He's going to practice on you
for a beauty parlor.
- 520. You're not gonna put mud
on my face, are you?
- 521. Ah, we are going to take some off.
- 522. Make me look beautiful?
- 523. Sure. We can't make you
look any worse.
- 524. - Hannah!
- Oh, there's Mrs. Shoemaker for the laundry.
- 525. That's all right.
I'll give it to her.
- 526. - You sit here and enjoy yourself.
- 527. I know.
I've seen you making eyes.
- 528. Don't pay any attention to Mr. Jaeckel.
- 529. I like your shop since we fixed it up.
- 530. I wish I had a business like this.
- 531. There's no future in housework.
- 532. Maybe if I save my money
I can have a barbershop someday.
- 533. But I can never save.
- 534. Money slips through my fingers
- 535. Trouble is, I've always lived up
to every penny I've earned.
- 536. Why shouldn't I? You're here today
and gone tomorrow. And then where are you?
- 537. - Do you believe in God?
- Well -
- 538. I do. But if there wasn't one,
would you live any different?
- 539. I wouldn't. Life could be wonderful
if people'd leave you alone.
- 540. Things are looking brighter now.
- 541. Maybe you're the reason,
saving Commander Schultz's life.
- 542. Funny how they've left us alone lately.
Seems too good to be true.
- 543. Do you ever daydream?
- 544. I do.
- 545. That's the only time I'm really happy -
- 546. Back.
- 547. Sometimes I get so carried away I don't know
what I'm doing. Aren't you like that?
- 548. - Do you know we're very much alike?
- Are we?
- 549. Yeah.
We're both absentminded.
- 550. - You think so?
- 551. I like absentminded people.
- 552. Do you know the story about the man
that put his watch in boiling water...
- 553. and held the egg in his hand?
- 554. No!
- 555. Very good.
- 556. They say all great men
- 557. It's a sign they're smart.
- 558. My folks didn't think so.
- 559. Of course there's an excuse for you.
You were injured in the war.
- 560. I was born that way.
- 561. Wonder why women
never grow whiskers.
- 562. Hmm? What?
- 563. I s -
- 564. What -
- 565. - Oh, my!
- Isn't that foolish of me!
- 566. I could kick myself in the shins, I could.
- 567. I'll give you a shampoo.
- 568. That's good.
- 569. Voilà.
- 570. Gee.
- 571. Ain't I cute!
- 572. How'd you do it?
- 573. You should try it on yourself.
- 574. If you were fixed up,
you'd look handsome.
- 575. - Yes?
- 576. No.
- 577. Four pecks a pound! New potatoes!
- 578. There's the potato man.
I have to go.
- 579. Potatoes!
- 580. One, please!
- 581. Take it easy there.
- 582. Well, did you hurt yourself?
- 583. - Careful next time.
- Here's another one.
- 584. How do you do?
- 585. Something's happened. I know it.
The storm troopers, they helped me up.
- 586. Wouldn't it be wonderful
if they stopped hating us...
- 587. if they'd leave us alone and let us
go about our business like we used to.
- 588. Wouldn't it be wonderful if we didn't
have to leave and go to another country?
- 589. I don't want to go away. With all the hardship
and the persecution, I love it here.
- 590. Perhaps we don't have to go.
- 591. Wouldn't it be wonderful
if they'd let us live and be happy again?
- 592. Period.
- 593. Danke schoen.
- 594. Nothing works! Not a decent pen!
Not even a sharp pencil!
- 595. I'm surrounded by nothing but incompetent,
stupid, sterile stenographers!
- 596. - I'll get you a pen.
- Don't bother.
- 597. I won't send it.
- 598. Get out! Get out! Get out!
- 599. We've just discovered the most wonderful,
the most marvelous poison gas!
- 600. It will kill everybody!
- 601. All right, later, later, later.
- 602. B-76 to see Herr Herring.
- 603. - Who's that?
- A lady.
- 604. My secret agent.
- 605. Your secret agent.
Tell her to come here.
- 606. Have B-76 come right in.
- 607. Hail Hynkel.
- 608. - Oh, Garbitsch, what do you hear from Epstein?
- Most encouraging.
- 609. Our agent reports that all the board of directors
are Aryans, so the loan is bound to go through.
- 610. - Good.
- Hail Hynkel.
- 611. Come here.
- 612. - Well?
- The men are planning a strike at the arms factory.
- 613. - Who's the leader?
- There were five of them.
- 614. - Have them shot.
- They were, Your Excellency.
- 615. - How many do you say were going on strike?
- The whole factory - 3,000 of them.
- 616. Have them all shot. I don't want
any of my workers dissatisfied.
- 617. But, Your Excellency,
these men are skilled craftsmen.
- 618. Why not let them work till
they can train others, then shoot them?
- 619. We cannot afford to be lenient!
- 620. The whole rhythm of production
will be affected if you shoot them now.
- 621. "Rhythm of production. "
All right, have your rhythms.
- 622. You may instruct your operatives to spare
the strikers and permit them to return to work...
- 623. but to mark them
for future reference.
- 624. That is my department.
I'll attend to that.
- 625. This way, madam.
- 626. Strange. These strike leaders - they're
all brunettes. Not a blonde amongst them.
- 627. Brunettes are troublemakers.
They're worse than the Jews.
- 628. Then wipe them out.
- 629. Doucement.
Not so fast.
- 630. We get rid of the Jews first.
Then concentrate on the brunettes.
- 631. We shall never have peace
until we have a pure Aryan race.
- 632. How wonderful.
- 633. Tomainia, a nation
of blue-eyed blondes.
- 634. Why not a blonde Europe,
a blonde Asia, a blonde America?
- 635. - A blonde world.
- And a brunette dictator.
- 636. Dictator of the world.
- 637. Why not?
- 638. Aut Caesar aut nulles.
- 639. The world is effete, worn-out, afraid.
- 640. No nation would dare to oppose you.
- 641. - Dictator of the world!
- It's your destiny.
- 642. We'll kill off the Jews,
wipe out the brunettes.
- 643. Then will come forth our dream -
a pure Aryan race.
- 644. - Beautiful blonde Aryans.
- They will love you. They will adore you.
- 645. - They will worship you as a god!
- No, no! You mustn't say it!
- 646. You make me afraid of myself.
- 647. Yes, dictator of the world.
- 648. We'll start
with the invasion of Osterlich.
- 649. After that we won't have to fight.
We can bluff.
- 650. Nation after nation will capitulate.
- 651. Within two years
the world will be under your thumb!
- 652. Leave me.
I want to be alone.
- 653. Aut Caesar aut nulles.
- 654. Emperor of the world!
- 655. My world.
- 656. This is the Happy Hour program.
- 657. Make your work a pleasure.
Move with the rhythm of music.
- 658. Our next selection:
Brahms' "Hungarian Dance No. 5."
- 659. Fifteen cents, please.
- 660. The Happy Hour program now signing off.
- 661. At 6:00 all stations will carry
Adenoid Hynkel's address...
- 662. to the sons and daughters
of the Double Cross.
- 663. Seems like the old days again,
- 664. I wonder how long
they are going to last.
- 665. Don't you read the papers?
- 666. It is rumored that Hynkel is going to
give the Jewish people back their rights.
- 667. Hmm. Maybe.
- 668. What do you want?
- 669. Business is much better.
Nobody interferes with us anymore.
- 670. Now don't that make you feel good?
- 671. No, sir.
- 672. The trouble, Mr. Jaeckel, is, you're so used
to bad times you're unhappy without them.
- 673. Mary? Mary!
Get my Sunday shoes.
- 674. - You'll find them on the window sill.
- All right.
- 675. - I can't find the shawl.
- Don't bother. I've got the shawl.
- 676. - What's going on upstairs?
- It's Hannah.
- 677. They're dressing her up
to go out this evening.
- 678. - Is that so?
- She's got a beau.
- 679. - Who is it?
- The barber.
- 680. Now turn around.
- 681. Oh, my dear, those hands.
- 682. - What's the matter with them?
- Those calluses - they're so rough.
- 683. - Maybe I'd better not go.
- Don't be foolish.
- 684. He knows you do housework.
- 685. Wait a minute.
I'll get a pair of mittens from Mrs. Morris.
- 686. - Mrs. Morris?
- Yes, Mrs. Jaeckel? Come in!
- 687. Aggie.
- 688. - Yeah?
- See if he's ready yet.
- 689. All right.
- 690. Not yet.
He's polishing a bald man's head.
- 691. Bad news.
- 692. The invasion of Osterlich
will have to be delayed.
- 693. - What?
- Epstein refuses to lend us the money.
- 694. Epstein refuses, huh?
- 695. Send for Schultz!
- 696. Commander Schultz.
- 697. Epstein refuses!
- 698. That contemptible Epstein!
What did he say?
- 699. He complained
of the persecution of his people...
- 700. and said under no circumstances would he
have any dealings with a medieval maniac.
- 701. He'll deal with a medieval maniac
more than he thinks!
- 702. First I shall deal with "his people. "
- 703. Your Excellency?
- 704. Schultz, call out the storm troopers.
- 705. We're going to stage
a little medieval entertainment in the ghetto.
- 706. At such a time, Your Excellency,
I think it's ill-advised.
- 707. What?
- 708. Demonstrations of this kind
are demoralizing the whole country.
- 709. Indeed.
- 710. And since when have you been
so concerned about the ghetto?
- 711. I speak in the interests of our party
and for the cause of humanity.
- 712. Schultz.
- 713. You need a vacation.
- 714. Fresh air.
- 715. A little outdoor exercise.
- 716. I shall send you
to a concentration camp.
- 717. Guards!
- 718. Place Commander Schultz under arrest.
- 719. Very well,
but remember my words.
- 720. Your cause is doomed to failure because it's built on
the stupid, ruthless persecution of innocent people.
- 721. Your policy is worse than a crime.
- 722. It's a tragic blunder.
- 723. Traitor! Traitor!
- 724. You're nothing
but a double-dyed democrat!
- 725. Schultz, why have you forsaken me?
- 726. Excellency, here are the notes
for your speech.
- 727. Thank you.
- 728. I'll not need them.
- 729. What I say tonight will not be directed
to the sons and daughters of the Double Cross...
- 730. but to the children of Israel.
- 731. - Ah. Good evening.
- Good evening.
- 732. Good night.
- 733. Do you know, that Hynkel
isn't such a bad fella after all.
- 734. Most amusing.
- 735. Here you are.
Get a Hynkel button. Get a Hynkel button.
- 736. A fine photo of the Phooey
on each and every button.
- 737. Two? Here you are, young man.
- 738. the double-crossin'!
- 739. But the Juden! The Juden!
- 740. und the ghetto...
- 741. The ghetto -
- 742. - We'd better go home.
- 743. Come on, let's hurry.
- 744. Wait a minute. No!
- 745. the Juden. The Juden -
- 746. The Juden! The Juden!
- 747. Hey.
- 748. What's that?
- 749. Turn off the radio!
- 750. Listen!
- 751. It's the storm troopers!
- 752. No, no!
- 753. Oh, come on! Get in!
- 754. Come on! Come on! Get in!
- 755. - Bar that door!
- Get some water!
- 756. Mr. Jaeckel.
Mr. Jaeckel, Mr. Jaeckel, Mr. Jaeckel!
- 757. Oh, my dear!
- 758. What is it, dear?
- 759. Mother, get the women and children up here.
Lock all the doors.
- 760. Here. You men, stay right here.
- 761. We've got to make a stand.
- 762. We might as well die
as to go on living like this.
- 763. Wait a minute!
We have a social call to make here!
- 764. It's Hynkel!
- 765. Wait a minute!
- 766. What do you think you're doing?
- 767. Commander Schultz gave strict orders
not to molest anyone in this court.
- 768. These Jews were attacking storm troopers.
- 769. I don't care what they were doing.
The orders were to keep out of here.
- 770. There! You saw that for yourself!
- 771. I can't help it.
Those are Commander Schultz's orders.
- 772. Come on. Let's get going.
- 773. Come on.
- 774. Orders or no orders,
I'm gonna get that girl.
- 775. Out.
- 776. Aww.
- 777. Extry! Paper!
- 778. - Schultz arrested! Paper!
- Did you hear that?
- 779. - He's arrested Commander Schultz.
- 780. Commander Schultz
has been arrested!
- 781. - TTroopers!
- 782. - A Jew corrupted our commander!
- Let's kill the lot of them!
- 783. Commander Schultz
is under arrest, accused of treason!
- 784. And you know why. Schultz was a friend
of the ghetto, a friend of that barber!
- 785. - Let's get the barber!
- We want the barber!
- 786. We want the barber!
- 787. - It's the storm troopers! They're after you!
- We want the barber!
- 788. - You better get up on the roof.
- No. I'll stay here.
- 789. Come on! They'll kill you!
- 790. - No, I'll stay and fight!
- Don't be a fool!
- 791. Do you want to be murdered?
Get on to the roof. Quick!
- 792. - Come on! Come on!
- Agar, get inside.
- 793. We want the barber!
We want the barber!
- 794. We want the barber!
- 795. All right, here we are!
Smash in the door! Come on!
- 796. Come on, boys!
- 797. Come on, boys!
We'll give the barber a haircut!
- 798. - All right, where are the bombs?
- Come on. This way!
- 799. Let 'er go!
- 800. There goes the barbershop.
- 801. Never mind. We can start again.
- 802. We can go to Osterlich.
That's still a free country.
- 803. Mr. Jaeckel says it's beautiful there.
- 804. Wonderful green fields,
and they grow apples and grapes.
- 805. Mr. Jaeckel's brother's got a vineyard
- 806. And when Mr. Jaeckel goes there,
he said he'd take me with him.
- 807. Now we can all go together.
- 808. It'll be wonderful living in the country.
- 809. Much better than a smoky old city.
- 810. And if we work hard and don't eat much,
we can save money.
- 811. We can buy a chicken farm.
- 812. There's nice money
to be made in chickens.
- 813. Look at that star.
- 814. Isn't it beautiful?
- 815. One thing - Hynkel with all his power
can never touch that.
- 816. It's all right now.
The coast is clear. Listen.
- 817. Commander Schultz escaped.
He's hiding in my cellar.
- 818. What?
- 819. He's holding a meeting at midnight
and he wants you to be there.
- 820. Hannah, you too come down...
- 821. and help Mrs. Jaeckel with the supper.
- 822. All right. I'll be down.
- 823. I don't understand it.
- 824. This crazy midnight supper.
- 825. What does this Commander Schultz
want of us?
- 826. He wants us to blow up the palace.
- 827. What?
- 828. We Jewish people shouldn't
get mixed up in such a business.
- 829. I know it, but Commander Schultz is such
a good talker, he has them all hypnotized.
- 830. I knew he was up to some mischief.
- 831. Sure, he is!
- 832. I came in the kitchen this evening...
- 833. and found him putting a coin
in one of your puddings.
- 834. Putting a coin in one of the puddings?
- 835. But don't worry. I've fixed everything.
Wait and see.
- 836. Gentlemen, may I claim
your indulgence for a moment?
- 837. We are here tonight
to rid the country of a tyrant.
- 838. In order to carry out this plan,
one of us must die.
- 839. In ancient times,
the Aryan tribe of Langobardians...
- 840. made human sacrifice to the god Thor.
- 841. At a feast by lottery
the victim was chosen.
- 842. Tonight at this feast
one of you will be chosen.
- 843. Each man will receive a pudding.
- 844. Concealed in one of these is a coin.
- 845. Whoever gets that coin must give up his life
for the liberation of his people.
- 846. But he will join the long line
of history's noble martyrs...
- 847. and will rid his country of a tyrant.
- 848. Ooh!
- 849. I know that it is the wish
of all of us...
- 850. to be chosen this night
to die for Tomainia.
- 851. Much as I should like
to participate in this ordeal...
- 852. I cannot.
- 853. Why?
- 854. Don't you understand?
He's too well-known.
- 855. It must be done by somebody like us.
- 856. I can't see it like that.
- 857. Gentlemen, if this is a question of my honor,
it's very embarrassing.
- 858. Commander Schultz,
I apologize for my friend.
- 859. And let me say on behalf
of myself and the others...
- 860. that we consider it a great privilege
to die for our country.
- 861. Very well then. Gentlemen, I shall now retire
until fate has chosen the liberator.
- 862. Until then, hail Hynk -
- 863. Oh, what am I saying?
- 864. Gentlemen, we have pledged our honor.
- 865. Proceed.
- 866. Gentlemen, the coin is here.
- 867. What's the meaning of all this?
- 868. Somebody made a fool of us.
- 869. - You're quite right. I did.
- 870. I put a coin in every pudding.
- 871. Mr. Jaeckel!
- 872. Blowing up palaces and wanting to kill people.
We're in enough trouble as it is.
- 873. Hannah's right.
We've all been foolish.
- 874. Our place is at home,
looking after our own affairs.
- 875. Good night.
- 876. What's this?
- 877. Good night.
- 878. Good morning.
- 879. By the papers they are saying Commander
Schultz may be hiding in the ghetto.
- 880. Here it is. Read it for yourself.
- 881. - Good morning.
- Good morning.
- 882. Hannah, here. Read that.
- 883. "Mystery still surrounds
- 884. of ex-Commander Schultz.
- 885. At police headquarters it was believed that
the commander may be hiding in the ghetto.
- 886. A certain Jewish barber,
reported to be a friend of Schultz...
- 887. is also wanted for questioning. "
- 888. Me?
- 889. Well, if it's just for questioning,
it can't be serious.
- 890. Meyerberg was only wanted for questioning,
and we never heard of him since.
- 891. Shh!
- 892. - Who is it?
- It's me - Mr. Mann.
- 893. Hello, Jaeckel. How are you, Mr. Agar?
- 894. - How are you, Mrs. Jaeckel?
- How do you do?
- 895. Did you hear
what they're saying in the papers...
- 896. about Commander Schultz
hiding in the ghetto?
- 897. Oh, I know, I know.
- 898. Well, don't you think that it's serious for you
if they find him here in the house?
- 899. Shh!
- 900. Don't you realize
there are spies everywhere?
- 901. Spies?
- 902. What's the matter with him?
- 903. Didn't you read
he's wanted for questioning?
- 904. Oy.
- 905. Where's the commander?
- 906. He's in the next room.
- 907. Let me tell you.
- 908. If Commander Schultz is found
in this house...
- 909. we'll all go to the concentration camp for life
and get our heads cut off in the bargain.
- 910. Am I giving you an argument?
- 911. Then get rid of him.
- 912. You can't throw him out.
- 913. Of course not.
- 914. But I should like to know,
how long is he going to stay here?
- 915. That's all.
- 916. Come. Your breakfast is on the table.
- 917. - Mr. Mann?
- Thank you.
- 918. I have breakfast waiting at home.
- 919. Take the other side of the street
and search every house.
- 920. - Good morning.
- Good morning.
- 921. - What's wrong now?
- They're looking for Commander Schultz.
- 922. - Commander Schultz?
- He's supposed to be hiding in one of those houses.
- 923. Oh, they're always looking
- 924. - Who is it?
- It's me. Let me in!
- 925. - For heaven's sake, hurry up!
- Open the door.
- 926. - They're coming this way.
- 927. The storm troopers are searching
- 928. Quick! Tell the commander.
- 929. - Did you tell him?
- 930. - What is it?
- The storm troopers, they're going to search the house.
- 931. - What?
- You'd better get up on the roof. Quick! Both of you!
- 932. Wait a minute!
- 933. - We can't leave all these things about.
- That's right. All of you, pack my valises.
- 934. You pack this valise.
- 935. - Clear this shelf. Quickly.
- Oh, yes.
- 936. Pack this and this.
- 937. Oh, this mustn't be found here.
Open the door.
- 938. Listen! They are here!
Get up on the roof. Quick!
- 939. - I'll take this.
- Be sure they don't leave anything behind.
- 940. - My golf clubs.
- The hatbox!
- 941. - Here. Take this.
- Come on! Let's hurry!
- 942. - Where are you going?
- I'm going with him.
- 943. You stay here. You'll see him later.
Here. Take this.
- 944. - I'll meet you on the roof tonight.
- All right.
- 945. Oh, take this.
- 946. Come on. Quick! Come on.
- 947. Open in the name of Hynkel!
- 948. Stop!
- 949. - Look where you are.
- Look where?
- 950. Look where you are.
- 951. Wait, I can't - I can't see.
Wait a moment.
- 952. - My bag! You've dropped it!
- No, it's right here. Here it is.
- 953. Don't drop the other one!
Don't drop the other one!
- 954. My golf clubs! Not my golf clubs!
- 955. Come off of there. They'll see you.
- 956. Quick! This way!
- 957. Whoa! Steady!
- 958. Now be careful.
- 959. Yes, sir.
- 960. You were lucky
you didn't break your neck.
- 961. Yes, sir.
- 962. You'll pardon me.
- 963. Sorry.
- 964. You guard the back -
Wait a minute.
- 965. I'm sorry.
I shall have to bother you again.
- 966. There he is!
- 967. Well, good morning. How are you?
- 968. Oh, so-so.
- 969. Commander Schultz, who's your friend?
- 970. Remember, your silence
will be appreciated.
- 971. - Yes, sir.
- Take him down to the wagon.
- 972. Come on.
- 973. - Hey! Where you going?
- To the smoking room.
- 974. Ah, come on! Down this way!
- 975. Osterlich.
- 976. Ja.
- 977. Gentlemen, I am pleased to announce...
- 978. that we are at last
ready to march on Osterlich.
- 979. This was made possible
by the enterprise and genius...
- 980. of Field Marshal Herring...
- 981. upon whom I shall now pin
a token of my regard.
- 982. der Wiener schnitzel -
- 983. da genius.
- 984. Turn around. No. Ah, yes.
- 985. Gentlemen...
- 986. to Field Marshal Herring.
- 987. To the invasion of Osterlich.
- 988. Elephant.
- 989. Hello? Yes. Yes.
- 990. Wait.
- 991. Napaloni's mobilized his army
on the Osterlich front.
- 992. What?
- 993. Already 60,000 men are on the border.
- 994. He's going to take Osterlich!
- 995. I can't believe it.
- 996. You can't believe it?
- 997. But, Your Excellency, I -
- 998. - You let him steal a march on us!
- No, I -
- 999. You can't believe it?
- 1000. I did everything that was -
- 1001. I had the ground covered.
- 1002. Haven't you any brains?
- 1003. "pinheaden"...
- 1004. No! No, no, no, no, no!
- 1005. No, no, no, no, no!
- 1006. No, no - No!
- 1007. - Declare war on Napaloni!
- 1008. Yes, Napaloni! Listen, you blockhead! Mobilize
every division of the army and the air force.
- 1009. - Proceed to Bacteria and attack at once!
- But war will be the end of us.
- 1010. - Do as I tell you.
- 1011. - Shut up!
- Very well. Will you sign this?
- 1012. - Yes, I'll - What is it?
- A declaration of war.
- 1013. I'll sign it. A pen.
- 1014. I'll sign it.
- 1015. A pen!
- 1016. I'll sign it! Napaloni.
- 1017. Der grosser peanut!
Der cheesy ravioli!
- 1018. There!
- 1019. Hello?
- 1020. - It's Napaloni.
- Wait a minute.
- 1021. Napaloni?
- 1022. - You talk to him.
- What shall I say?
- 1023. Be nice, affable, pleasant.
- 1024. Hello?
- 1025. Well, well, well. How are you?
- 1026. Fine.
- 1027. No, he hasn't been playing
very much lately.
- 1028. You went around in '92? Really?
- 1029. You want to speak to His Excellency?
- 1030. Just now he's a little hoarse.
- 1031. Hmm. No, no. I mean he can't talk.
- 1032. May I take a message?
- 1033. He says no doubt you've heard of the movement
of his troops on the Osterlich front...
- 1034. and he'd like to discuss
the matter with you.
- 1035. Ask him to come here.
- 1036. His Excellency would be delighted
to invite you to Tomainia...
- 1037. where you could discuss the matter.
- 1038. Very well.
I'll make the necessary arrangements.
- 1039. Good-bye, Your Excellency.
- 1040. He's coming.
- 1041. Good. We'll give him the works.
- 1042. We'll put on the greatest military show
the world has ever known!
- 1043. Convinced of my strength, Napaloni will
leave the invasion of Osterlich to me.
- 1044. What shall I do with this?
- 1045. - What is it?
- Your declaration of war.
- 1046. Peace is declared.
- 1047. 2,975,000 eager citizens
are massed in the station square...
- 1048. awaiting the arrival
of Benzine Napaloni.
- 1049. Entering the station is our beloved Phooey,
ready to greet his distinguished guest.
- 1050. This historic meeting
will cement a friendship...
- 1051. that has long existed between our Phooey
and the dictator of Bacteria.
- 1052. Order... arms!
- 1053. His Excellency is about to greet
the Bacterian ambassador.
- 1054. - How do you do?
- Thank you, sir.
- 1055. Garbitsch.
- 1056. See about the photography.
- 1057. When Their Excellencies meet...
- 1058. tell the press to see that our Phooey
- 1059. - Full face, not the back of his head.
- Yes, sir.
- 1060. Benzino Napaloni's private train
is now coming into the station.
- 1061. And from a pink and white car...
- 1062. - Napaloni and his wife will step onto a crimson carpet...
- Present arms!
- 1063. where Adenoid Hynkel will deliver
his address of welcome.
- 1064. What's the matter with this stupid -
- 1065. Hey! What's all of this-a mix-up-a?
- 1066. Come on. They've gone too far.
- 1067. At ease! Bring along the carpet.
- 1068. Papa, why can't we get out here?
- 1069. - There is no carpet.
- Who cares about a carpet?
- 1070. Il Dig-a-Ditchy, me - Napaloni.
I never get out without a carpet.
- 1071. Come on.
Lay it down here. Quick.
- 1072. - Hurry up!
- It's going back again!
- 1073. What?
- 1074. What do you do? You salami?
- 1075. Let's get out!
Let's get out while it's stopping!
- 1076. Shut up!
- 1077. Hurry. Quick. Put it down.
- 1078. Take it away. Take it away.
- 1079. Stay here. Stay here
until they've made up their mind.
- 1080. You got-a the carpet?
Well, put 'em-a down!
- 1081. Hmm. Oh, come on, come on.
- 1082. Here he is.
- 1083. - My friend!
- 1084. - This is indeed a pleasure.
- Thank you.
- 1085. Welcome to Tomainia. This way.
- 1086. Pictures, Your Excellencies?
- 1087. Oh, sure. Salute!
- 1088. Another one, please.
- 1089. Ah, this is really a pleasure
to be here, my friend Hynkel.
- 1090. Oh, you want another picture?
Just a moment.
- 1091. There.
- 1092. - Hey, hey, hey, hey!
- My bambino!
- 1093. - All right. It's all right-a, Mama.
- Get rid of those men.
- 1094. - Where is my ambassador?
- 1095. - There you are. Hello, Spook.
- Your Excellency.
- 1096. How do you feel?
Good! Look after Mama.
- 1097. Oh, Hynkie, did you meet-a my wife?
- 1098. - Your wife?
- That's her.
- 1099. - I -
- Let's go.
- 1100. Tomainia! Very nice. Very nice.
- 1101. Present... arms!
- 1102. Napaloni! Napaloni!
- 1103. Clock is a-two minutes-a slow.
- 1104. This way.
- 1105. Napaloni! Napaloni!
- 1106. Napaloni!
- 1107. It's-a very nice-a people.
- 1108. - I say, the people are very nice.
- Oh, yes. Thank you.
- 1109. - He is my husband!
- Keep back!
- 1110. - You make a mistake!
- Let me go!
- 1111. - You make a big-a mistake-a!
- Get back!
- 1112. Please!
- 1113. At all costs, Napaloni shall not
- 1114. That country belongs to me.
- 1115. At this meeting we shall not
discuss the Osterlich situation.
- 1116. This interview is solely to impress upon him
the force of your personality.
- 1117. - Hmm.
- To make him feel your superiority.
- 1118. This man Napaloni
is aggressive, domineering.
- 1119. Before we make our demands,
we must put him in his place.
- 1120. - Precisely. But how?
- By means of applied psychology.
- 1121. In other words,
by making him feel inferior.
- 1122. This can be done in many subtle ways.
- 1123. For instance, at this interview,
I have so arranged...
- 1124. that he will always be
looking up at you...
- 1125. you looking down at him.
- 1126. At all times his position
will be inferior.
- 1127. Mmm. Excellent.
- 1128. Then again, we shall seat him here
beside your bust...
- 1129. so that if you relax,
that will always be glaring at him.
- 1130. And?
- 1131. Where is he now?
- 1132. Resting.
When he arrives, I have arranged...
- 1133. that he shall enter
from the far end of the room.
- 1134. Another psychological triumph.
- 1135. He will have the embarrassment of walking
the entire length of the floor toward you.
- 1136. Very good.
- 1137. Yes?
- 1138. His Excellency
Signor Napaloni is now leaving his room.
- 1139. He's coming! He's coming!
Quick, get me a flower. A flower.
- 1140. Remember, at all times you must be
above him, before him.
- 1141. Entering or leaving,
you must be first.
- 1142. Hello, Hynkie!
- 1143. Wie Gootz! Wie geht's!
- 1144. How-a you feel?
- 1145. Wait a minute. Wait a minute.
Ah, my brother dictator!
- 1146. You are a nice little man, a-Hynkie!
- 1147. I'm so glad to see you again.
- 1148. And my friend the Garbitsch!
- 1149. Ah, this is a lovely place.
- 1150. I feel-a fine.
I just had a nice-a cold shower.
- 1151. And that bathtub - as soon as you get
the plumbing fixed, it'll be in-a good-a shape.
- 1152. Your Excellency, won't you sit down.
- 1153. Oh, shoot, shoot.
- 1154. Well-a, Hynkie, my dictator friend, you -
- 1155. I must be-a growing.
- 1156. Not sure why they gave me
a baby stool.
- 1157. This-a stool is not for me.
I like it-a better up-a-stairs here.
- 1158. You know-a something, Garbitsch?
This is a lovely country.
- 1159. Very nice-a people.
- 1160. I thought the public extremely enthusiastic
on your arrival.
- 1161. Sure. They like to see new faces.
- 1162. I'm sorry for the mishap that occurred
to Madam Napaloni at the railroad station.
- 1163. What's that? What's that?
- 1164. I'm sorry for the Napaloni
that occurred at the - at the rail -
- 1165. Madam Napaloni at the railway station.
- 1166. Oh, she's not used to public life.
She can't take it.
- 1167. Match.
- 1168. Oh - I'm sorry. I'm -
- 1169. No, that's all right.
Don't apologize. I find-a one.
- 1170. I am simply crazy about this a-palace.
- 1171. Ivory and gold -
that makes a lovely combination.
- 1172. Gets away from that gingerbread idea.
Say, tell me something-a, Garbitsch.
- 1173. What's on the program?
- 1174. - There's the grand ball this evening.
- Grand ball?
- 1175. The grand ball. And this afternoon,
a review of the army.
- 1176. Review of the army?
Well, that won't take-a long.
- 1177. - I'm afraid it will.
- Oh? So you got a big army, huh?
- 1178. Modesty forbids.
- 1179. Yes, seems I've heard
something about it.
- 1180. If I'm gonna review the army,
I think I'll get me a shave.
- 1181. - We have a barbershop in the palace.
- Is that so?
- 1182. Hynkie, you look a little blue
under the gills.
- 1183. - What do you say we take a shave together?
- I should be delighted.
- 1184. - Good!
- Very well. This way.
- 1185. Ah, this is the barbershop.
I can-a smell 'em.
- 1186. Ah, now this is-a sweet -
a- very sweet.
- 1187. - Do you like it? It was the emperor's library.
- Makes a good a-barbershop.
- 1188. - Too old fashioned. I want something modern.
- Is that so?
- 1189. You see, when I get shaved, I'm very nervous.
I like something to look at.
- 1190. So I'm putting in glass walls and ceiling...
- 1191. so that when my head is turned this way,
I shall have a view of the mountains.
- 1192. And when it's tipped this way,
I shall have a view through the glass ceiling.
- 1193. - What's above-a the ceiling?
- The ballroom.
- 1194. Then in my summer palace
I have a barbershop.
- 1195. Is that so?
- 1196. Yes.
- 1197. That also has glass walls.
- 1198. You don't tell me.
- 1199. Oh, yes.
With goldfish swimming inside.
- 1200. Wait a minute.
Goldfish swimming inside-a the walls?
- 1201. - Mm-hmm.
- How do you feed 'em?
- 1202. You can't. They're all dead.
That's why I'm building a new barbershop.
- 1203. - Very interesting. Very interesting.
- Yes? Do you like it?
- 1204. This is the Hynkel Stadium.
- 1205. Before a half million spectators, the greatest
display of arms the world has ever known...
- 1206. marches by in review.
- 1207. Our beloved Phooey
and Il Dig-a-Ditchy are seated...
- 1208. in the reviewing stand,
thrilled by this historic event.
- 1209. What?
- 1210. Nothing. I'm just chewing.
- 1211. - Ah, yes.
- Would you care for some peanuts?
- 1212. - Thank you. I've had some.
- Oh. Good shape. Here you are, Spook.
- 1213. Now passing -
Tomainia's heavy artillery.
- 1214. It's all right.
- 1215. I want to show you my new bombing planes.
I just called up a half hour ago to start 'em over.
- 1216. - Where are they coming from?
- 1217. Aroma? That's 400 miles away.
- 1218. That's right. They should be here now.
I don't know what's detaining them.
- 1219. Now passing -
Tomainia's light artillery.
- 1220. Hmm. That's very light.
- 1221. And here come the armored tanks...
- 1222. the pride of Tomainia's army.
- 1223. The latest design,
the last word in modern warfare.
- 1224. Wait a minute.
Where's the propellers?
- 1225. - Propellers?
- Sure. For going under the water.
- 1226. - Tanks that go under the water?
- Submarine work!
- 1227. You never heard of aero-marine tanks that
go under the water and then fly up-a-stairs?
- 1228. - What's that?
- Tanks that go under the water and fly in the air.
- 1229. Oh, yes. Those are obsolete now.
- 1230. We're concentrating
on flying dreadnoughts.
- 1231. Flying dreadnoughts.
- 1232. - What's that?
- My planes!
- 1233. Now passing -
Hynkel's flying division number 34.
- 1234. Our planes!
- 1235. You're right. They're yours.
- 1236. Ah, Garbitsch.
- 1237. The invasion of Osterlich.
- 1238. It's all so simple. Our troops, tanks
and guns will be hidden along the border.
- 1239. To disarm suspicion, you will go hunting -
duck shooting or something.
- 1240. At the appointed time, you will show up
at the village of Pretzelberg...
- 1241. meet the army, step into an automobile
and cross over into Osterlich.
- 1242. Herring and I will be waiting
at the capital to receive you.
- 1243. First, Napaloni must remove
his troops from the border.
- 1244. That question will be decided tonight.
- 1245. Where is Napaloni?
- 1246. I'll see if I can find him.
In the meantime...
- 1247. it might be advisable for you
to dance with Madam Napaloni.
- 1248. It'll carry weight.
- 1249. You mean I will carry weight.
- 1250. You find him. Let me know at once.
- 1251. - Madam Napaloni.
- Your Excellency.
- 1252. Why so triste?
- 1253. 'Cause I no speak-a.
- 1254. No? May I have the pleasure
of this dance?
- 1255. Oh, yes.
- 1256. Allow me.
- 1257. Madam, your dancing was superb.
- 1258. Excellent.
- 1259. Very good.
- 1260. Good.
- 1261. - Ah, my dear Adenoid!
- 1262. I've been-a looking for you all evening.
What do you say we have a sandwich...
- 1263. go to some quiet little place where we can
sit down and talk-a things over, huh?
- 1264. - As you wish.
- An excellent idea! Gentlemen, to the buffet.
- 1265. Of course. This way.
- 1266. There's an old Tomainian proverb.
- 1267. That's very funny! I wish I understand it.
- 1268. Now, about the border situation.
- 1269. - Ah, yes, yes. No problem.
- Oh, it should be no trouble at all.
- 1270. - Shh, shh.
- Not at all.
- 1271. - What's the matter?
- 1272. Out!
- 1273. You two, out!
- 1274. Out.
- 1275. - Out?
- 1276. Out?
- 1277. Out.
- 1278. As I was saying, about the border question.
- 1279. - Ah, yes, yes, yes.
- Just a matter of detail. Mere formalities.
- 1280. Strawberries.
- 1281. Pardon me.
Have you English mustard?
- 1282. - English mustard, Your Excellency.
- That's the hot-a stuff?
- 1283. - Very hot.
- Ah, good shape, good shape.
- 1284. - Cream.
- Cream, Your Excellency.
- 1285. Now, Hynkie, as far as I'm concerned,
I'm gonna make this very simple.
- 1286. This is the treaty -
You agree not to invade Osterlich...
- 1287. I agree not to invade Osterlich.
- 1288. We sign-a the treaty,
then I remove-a my troops from the border.
- 1289. Good. In other words, when your troops
are off the border, I sign.
- 1290. - That's-a right.
- Very good.
- 1291. Oh, just a minute.
You don't understand.
- 1292. First we sign-a the treaty,
then I remove-a the troops.
- 1293. Precisely. I sign when your troops
are off the border.
- 1294. Just a minute.
Hey, Spook, treaty.
- 1295. Hold-a this.
- 1296. Now, look.
- 1297. You a-sign this-a treaty a-first...
- 1298. then I remove-a the troops after.
- 1299. - Well, what are we arguing about?
- You just said I remove-a the troops a-first.
- 1300. You don't expect me to sign
while your troops are there on the border?
- 1301. You don't expect me to remove-a
the troops until you sign?
- 1302. - Why not?
- Why should I?
- 1303. - Why shouldn't you? Osterlich is a free country.
- 1304. Your soldiers are there,
on the Osterlich border!
- 1305. And they'll stay there
until you sign this-a treaty!
- 1306. You'll take them off, or I'll blow them off!
- 1307. Gentlemen, this won't get us anywhere.
- 1308. Your Excellency, to quote
an old Latin phrase -
- 1309. He's a-right! Speak-a to him!
- 1310. Strawberries.
- 1311. Where's my-a sandwich?
Well, give me another one!
- 1312. - Can't we sit down and discuss this -
- I'm a guest-a here.
- 1313. Nobody talk to me in my own-a joint
- 1314. Can't we sit down and discuss this thing
- 1315. I am not-a passionate.
I am-a just, that's all.
- 1316. I want him to sign-a the treaty.
I'll remove the troops.
- 1317. Can't you understand?
What would my people think...
- 1318. signing such a treaty when your soldiers
are there on the Osterlich border?
- 1319. I will not-a move a-soldiers
until you-a sign!
- 1320. Not until you clear that border
will I sign anything.
- 1321. - Then my soldiers remain!
- Then I kick them off!
- 1322. One move-a from you, Hynkie, and my artillery
take-a like this and blow you to pieces!
- 1323. Yes, and my aeroplanes will bomb
your artillery like that!
- 1324. You want to start a world-a war?
I'll get you one!
- 1325. You and the world!
I'll throw in the ocean!
- 1326. - Mmm!
- Gentlemen, please!
- 1327. I'm-a coming home!
I cannot talk to this ignoramus!
- 1328. Strawberries!
- 1329. Your Excellency,
we have a very important position...
- 1330. that I must urge upon you.
- 1331. I know what you must -
- 1332. If you would -
- 1333. What's wrong?
- 1334. I don't give a hoopy!
I got-a my guns here in the pass!
- 1335. If he start-a something,
I'll blow him to "passes!"
- 1336. Excellency, what's the matter?
What ails you? What has -
- 1337. - Your Excellency, this isn't like you.
- Hey! What is the matter?
- 1338. Hey, Garbitsch, come here!
- 1339. What is the matter with-a Hynkie?
- 1340. He's put mustard on his strawberries.
- 1341. Mustard -
What else-a can you expect from Hynkie?
- 1342. Il Dig-a-Ditchy!
- 1343. What? What's the matter? What?
- 1344. My little bambino!
- 1345. the Bacterian -
- 1346. You cannot treat-a
the Bacterian people this way!
- 1347. I'll take the Bacterian people
and I'll tear them apart like this!
- 1348. - Excellency, please!
- Look! Look what he's-a doing!
- 1349. It's an insult to my people!
- 1350. Look, he's-a pulling spaghetti!
- 1351. He either sign-a the treaty,
or we have a war!
- 1352. - Ooh!
- Listen! Listen!
- 1353. Give me a-something! Quick!
Give me a-something! I want to -
- 1354. - But it's all right. I have an appointment.
- What's this?
- 1355. I'm from the international press.
How's the conference progressing?
- 1356. Very successfully. How did you get in?
Excuse me, will you?
- 1357. How did this man get in here?
- 1358. You know the regulations of the palace in
regard to reporters. Go down to Captain Block.
- 1359. Tell him not to allow anyone else to enter
the palace under any circumstances tonight.
- 1360. - You understand?
- Yes, sir.
- 1361. Of course, there are minor details
to be cleaned up, things that you must -
- 1362. Excuse me. We're very busy.
- 1363. - Oh!
- Gentlemen, please!
- 1364. The press are outside. The whole world
will know that we're fighting.
- 1365. - So what?
- Can't we come to some agreement?
- 1366. - Not until he-a signs!
- I sign nothing!
- 1367. Your Excellency,
I must speak to you alone.
- 1368. - Do you mind?
- Mind? I don't a-mind!
- 1369. - What is it?
- Sign. Sign.
- 1370. Why should he have the advantage?
- 1371. What does it matter,
a mere scrap of paper?
- 1372. The moment you sign,
he'll take his troops off the border.
- 1373. We can move in without losing a man.
- 1374. I'll sign.
- 1375. What?
- 1376. Ah, my little Hynkie!
- 1377. My-a dictator brother!
I knew we have-a no trouble!
- 1378. Two prisoners escaped in officers' uniforms!
Officers tied up in the guard room!
- 1379. Sound the alarm!
Two prisoners escaped! Come on!
- 1380. The planes are searching for us.
- 1381. Let's make for the woods.
- 1382. No. We must keep in the open.
The border's that way.
- 1383. The invasion of Osterlich.
- 1384. Now... or never.
- 1385. Ducks!
- 1386. Did you hear that?
- 1387. Came from over there. Come on.
- 1388. Da Blitzen!
- 1389. Cheese and crackers!
- 1390. da Blitzen!
- 1391. A yodeler, huh?
Where'd you get that outfit?
- 1392. - What?
- Don't answer back!
- 1393. Where's your partner? Where's Schultz?
You won't talk, huh?
- 1394. - He'll talk when he gets into camp!
- Come on!
- 1395. There it is -
the village of Pretzelberg.
- 1396. Pretzelberg.
- 1397. If we can pass through there,
we're safe across the Osterlich border.
- 1398. - Couldn't we go through the woods?
- Of course not.
- 1399. The woods are swarming with soldiers.
They'd suspect us at once.
- 1400. We must face the music.
If you see anyone, don't look right or left.
- 1401. We must bluff our way through.
Remember, you're a storm trooper.
- 1402. Here they come.
- 1403. Can you see what they're doing?
- 1404. - They're looking this way.
- Well, pay no attention. Keep going.
- 1405. They're beginning to follow us.
Shall we run?
- 1406. Certainly not.
- 1407. - Just a little bit?
- Keep walking.
- 1408. We could walk a little faster.
- 1409. Hmm? Make up your mind.
- 1410. - Perhaps we'd better slow down.
- No, no. Keep going.
- 1411. - There's no hurry.
- Come on.
- 1412. - What is it?
- He's here!
- 1413. What? Bugler! Sound assembly!
- 1414. Company! Attention!
- 1415. Present... arms!
- 1416. - You don't want to change your mind and turn back?
- No, keep going. Keep going.
- 1417. - Hail Hynkel.
- Order... arms!
- 1418. Your Excellency will be pleased to know
that everything is under control.
- 1419. - Good.
- 1420. I have been in continued communication
with Marshal Herring in Osterlich, sir.
- 1421. The route ahead of us is well-guarded.
- 1422. And at the back of us are 200 tanks,
50 armored cars and 500 machine guns.
- 1423. - Is that -
- 1424. - Good.
- Are we ready to start?
- 1425. - Yes.
- 1426. Gentlemen.
- 1427. Schultz, I'm certainly happy
to see you with us again.
- 1428. Thank you.
- 1429. - Where are we going?
- You're invading Osterlich.
- 1430. Mr. Jaeckel! Mr. Jaeckel!
- 1431. - Hannah!
- Mr. Jaeckel, look, they're coming!
- 1432. Present... arms!
- 1433. Hail Hynkel!
- 1434. Present... arms!
- 1435. Your Excellency,
the world awaits your word.
- 1436. What's happened to him?
He looks strange.
- 1437. And what's Schultz doing here?
- 1438. Pardoned, I suppose.
- 1439. Here.
- 1440. His Excellency, Herr Garbitsch...
- 1441. Secretary of the Interior,
Minister of Propaganda.
- 1442. "Corona veniet delectis. "
- 1443. "Victory shall come to the worthy. "
- 1444. Today, democracy, liberty and equality
are words to fool the people.
- 1445. No nation can progress
with such ideas.
- 1446. They stand in the way of action.
- 1447. Therefore, we frankly abolish them.
- 1448. In the future, each man will serve the interest
of the state with absolute obedience.
- 1449. Let him who refuses beware.
- 1450. The rights of citizenship will be taken away
from all Jews and other non-Aryans.
- 1451. They are inferior,
and therefore enemies of the state.
- 1452. It is the duty of all true Aryans
to hate and despise them.
- 1453. Henceforth, this nation is annexed
to the Tomainian Empire...
- 1454. and the people of this nation will obey
the laws bestowed upon us by our great leader...
- 1455. the dictator of Tomainia,
the conqueror of Osterlich...
- 1456. the future emperor of the world.
- 1457. You must speak.
- 1458. I can't.
- 1459. You must. It's our only hope.
- 1460. Hope.
- 1461. I'm sorry...
- 1462. but I don't want to be an emperor.
- 1463. That's not my business.
- 1464. I don't want to rule or conquer anyone.
- 1465. I should like to help everyone,
if possible -
- 1466. Jew, gentile, black man, white.
- 1467. We all want to help one another.
Human beings are like that.
- 1468. We want to live by each other's happiness,
not by each other's misery.
- 1469. We don't want to hate and despise
- 1470. In this world, there's room for everyone,
and the good earth is rich...
- 1471. and can provide for everyone.
- 1472. The way of life can be free and beautiful.
- 1473. But we have lost the way.
- 1474. Greed has poisoned men's souls...
- 1475. has barricaded the world with hate...
- 1476. has goose-stepped us
into misery and bloodshed.
- 1477. We have developed speed,
but we have shut ourselves in.
- 1478. Machinery that gives abundance
has left us in want.
- 1479. Our knowledge has made us cynical,
our cleverness hard and unkind.
- 1480. We think too much and feel too little.
- 1481. More than machinery,
we need humanity.
- 1482. More than cleverness,
we need kindness and gentleness.
- 1483. Without these qualities, life will be violent,
and all will be lost.
- 1484. The aeroplane and the radio
have brought us closer together.
- 1485. These very nature of these inventions
cries out for the goodness in men...
- 1486. cries out for universal brotherhood,
for the unity of us all.
- 1487. Even now, my voice is reaching
millions throughout the world...
- 1488. millions of despairing men,
women and little children...
- 1489. victims of a system that makes men torture
and imprison innocent people.
- 1490. To those who can hear me I say,
do not despair.
- 1491. The misery that is now upon us
is but the passing of greed...
- 1492. the bitterness of men who fear
the way of human progress.
- 1493. The hate of men will pass,
and dictators die...
- 1494. and the power they took from the people
will return to the people.
- 1495. And so long as men die,
liberty will never perish.
- 1496. Soldiers,
don't give yourselves to brutes...
- 1497. men who despise you, enslave you,
who regiment your lives...
- 1498. tell you what to do,
what to think and what to feel...
- 1499. who drill you, diet you, treat you like cattle,
use you as cannon fodder!
- 1500. Don't give yourselves
to these unnatural men -
- 1501. machine men with machine minds
and machine hearts!
- 1502. You are not machines!
You are not cattle! You are men!
- 1503. You have the love of humanity
in your hearts.
- 1504. You don't hate.
Only the unloved hate.
- 1505. The unloved and the unnatural.
- 1506. Soldiers, don't fight for slavery,
fight for liberty!
- 1507. In the 17th chapter of Saint Luke
it is written...
- 1508. "The kingdom of God is within man. "
- 1509. Not one man nor a group of men,
but in all men - in you!
- 1510. You the people have the power -
- 1511. the power to create machines,
the power to create happiness!
- 1512. You the people have the power
to make this life free and beautiful...
- 1513. to make this life a wonderful adventure.
- 1514. Then, in the name of democracy,
let us use that power!
- 1515. Let us all unite!
- 1516. Let us fight for a new world,
a decent world...
- 1517. that will give men a chance to work...
- 1518. that will give youth a future
and old age a security.
- 1519. By the promise of these things,
brutes have risen to power.
- 1520. But they lie. They do not fulfill that promise.
They never will!
- 1521. Dictators free themselves,
but they enslave the people.
- 1522. Now let us fight to fulfill that promise!
- 1523. Let us fight to free the world...
- 1524. to do away with national barriers,
to do away with greed...
- 1525. with hate and intolerance.
- 1526. Let us fight for a world of reason,
a world where science and progress...
- 1527. will lead to all men's happiness.
- 1528. Soldiers, in the name of democracy,
let us all unite!
- 1529. Hannah...
- 1530. can you hear me?
- 1531. Wherever you are, look up, Hannah.
- 1532. The clouds are lifting.
- 1533. The sun is breaking through.
- 1534. We are coming out of the darkness
and into the light.
- 1535. We are coming into a new world,
a kindlier world...
- 1536. where men will rise above their hate...
- 1537. their greed and brutality.
- 1538. Look up, Hannah.
- 1539. The soul of man has been given wings...
- 1540. and at last he is beginning to fly.
- 1541. He is flying into the rainbow...
- 1542. into the light of hope,
into the future -
- 1543. the glorious future...
- 1544. that belongs to you, to me...
- 1545. and to all of us.
- 1546. Look up, Hannah. Look up.
- 1547. Hannah, did you hear that?
- 1548. Listen.