- 1. At that moment, Alain studied
Lydia's face relentlessly...
- 2. as he had been doing
since she came to see him
- 3. three days earlier.
- 4. What was he looking for?
- 5. Lydia turned her head away,
- 6. lowered her eyelids,
and grew absorbed.
- 7. ln what?
- 8. ln herself?
- 9. Was it her contented rage
that swelled her neck and belly?
- 10. This sensation that emanated
nothing, but was so clear?
- 11. Once again the feeling had eluded him,
- 12. like a snake between stones.
- 13. Poor Alain.
You look so uncomfortable.
- 14. lt's been so long.
- 15. lt's my fault.
- 16. Let me see you smile, Alain.
- 17. lt was fine. L feel satisfied.
- 18. lt's light out.
- 19. l have to hurry.
- 20. l have packing to do.
- 21. Your plane isn't until 11:00.
- 22. l have a lot to do this morning.
- 23. Francesca is picking me up at 8:00.
- 24. lt was so good
to see you again.
- 25. You know...
- 26. l love you in a very special way.
- 27. Thank you for coming.
- 28. Thank Dorothy for that.
- 29. She's the one who asked me
to come see you.
- 30. She gave me the clinic address.
- 31. What shall l tell Dorothy?
- 32. Nothing. Why?
- 33. l said l'd phone her
when l get back to New York.
- 34. She wants to know
how you're getting along.
- 35. What will you say?
- 36. The truth.
That you're completely cured.
- 37. l'll ask her
what she has planned for you.
- 38. - Will you tell her we...
- No, Alain.
- 39. Unless you ask me to.
- 40. l won't ask you to.
- 41. She'll suspect something.
- 42. lt won't even occur to her.
- 43. She has other things on her mind.
- 44. Then again...
- 45. it's more likely to suit her.
- 46. Have you two discussed divorce?
- 47. We did, once.
- 48. Six months ago, just before l left.
- 49. And since then?
- 50. We haven't spoken since then.
- 51. She sends the doctor
a monthly check.
- 52. She never writes?
- 53. She did, at first.
- 54. And you?
- 55. l wrote her two weeks ago.
- 56. Didn't she mention it?
- 57. Do you still love her?
- 58. l don't know.
- 59. Dorothy isn't the woman for you.
- 60. She isn't rich enough.
She lets you do what you want.
- 61. You need a woman
who won't let you out of her sight.
- 62. Otherwise you get depressed
- 63. and act foolishly.
- 64. You know me so well.
- 65. When l get depressed,
l do foolish things.
- 66. Of course l know you.
- 67. ln fact, l think
l've always wanted to marry you.
- 68. Even in Dorothy's day.
- 69. l can't take you to the airport.
- 70. The doctor will be angry
about my spending the night out.
- 71. lf l don't go back now,
they'll throw me out.
- 72. Francesca will drive me.
- 73. ln any case, Alain,
- 74. we'll see each other again soon.
- 75. How long has it been?
- 76. Four months... or thereabouts.
- 77. Without a drop of liquor?
- 78. Since l finished the cure
not a drop.
- 79. The cure consists
of having you drink.
- 80. Drink... drink...
- 81. until you burst.
- 82. ls it rough?
- 83. Had l known
l wouldn't have done it.
- 84. And now?
- 85. Now?
- 86. Nothing.
- 87. Lydia...
- 88. l wanted you to know -
- 89. What're you doing?
- 90. l insist.
You've forgotten, but l haven't.
- 91. A gambling debt on the Zographos' boat,
four years ago.
- 92. This forgotten city.
- 93. So sad.
- 94. That strange clinic.
- 95. You're cured, Alain.
- 96. Why do you stay there?
- 97. l like it there.
- 98. A patient's life is ordered and simple.
- 99. lt shelters us.
- 100. l'm not eager to face life again.
- 101. Paris scares me.
- 102. Think l'm a coward?
- 103. No, Alain.
l think you're unhappy.
- 104. Come to New York.
- 105. Promise you'll come as soon as you can.
- 106. To settle things with Dorothy.
- 107. Even if you get back together.
- 108. Don't go. Don't leave me.
- 109. l need you.
- 110. Don't leave, l'm begging you.
- 111. l have to.
- 112. l have to be in New York tomorrow.
- 113. They want the designs.
- 114. - It's important?
- Everything depends on it.
- 115. l'm a businesswoman now.
- 116. l know, l'm leaving you
with your worst enemy. Yourself.
- 117. Come to New York.
- 118. No, Lydia, and l mean no.
- 119. l won't come to New York.
- 120. l won't marry you.
- 121. You'd be unhappy.
- 122. Anyway, you can't help me.
- 123. lt's too late.
- 124. Take madame to Paris.
Hotel Raphael, avenue Kléber.
- 125. MEDICAL SUPERVISlON
- 126. They're all at lunch.
- 127. Thomism comes from St. Thomas.
- 128. So "Saint" implies theology.
- 129. Nonsense! St. Thomas separated
philosophy from theology.
- 130. Some small-town professor
- 131. who posits Racine's world
against that of Proust, Cocteau, Genet.
- 132. The prig should read La Palatine.
- 133. Believing is not knowing.
- 134. You came in this morning.
- 135. Credo ut intelligam, my dear man.
- 136. "l believe in order to understand."
- 137. Not if you claim St. Thomas
separated philosophy and theology.
- 138. Don't confuse faith and understanding.
St. Thomas says,
- 139. "Where knowledge is, faith is not."
- 140. Some lovely persons must
have been so happy to see you again.
- 141. Lovely persons aren't demanding.
- 142. But you are.
- 143. lf you weren't, you wouldn't be here.
- 144. Ever been to America?
- 145. No, it's hard enough
getting to know our old Europe.
- 146. And they're so brutal there,
they might kill me.
- 147. Our young man looks pale
after his little jaunt.
- 148. He was handsomer before.
- He must still be.
- 149. You stare at him enough.
- 150. - Compared to Aristotle -
- l refuse to discuss Aristotle.
- 151. But reason dominates will.
It's what determines -
- 152. Why only talk to Mr. D'Averseau?
- 153. We'd all like to hear.
- 154. We sure would!
- 155. lt might be very interesting.
- 156. Are you leaving us?
- 157. No. Why?
- 158. That's what the doctor implied.
- 159. Aren't you happy with us?
- 160. Yes, l am.
- 161. l feel at home here.
- 162. You're my family.
- 163. Without it, Nothingness
wouldn't have any quality.
- 164. Where do your parents live?
- 165. ln the provinces.
- 166. They're very old.
- 167. l don't see them anymore.
- 168. Poor boy.
- 169. Poor boy?
- 170. A youth misspent in riotous living,
- 171. and now, problems!
- 172. You're not being sensible.
- 173. You should take
a nap this afternoon.
- 174. Go back to bed.
- 175. What a shame.
- 176. What a crying shame!
- 177. Checkmate in five moves...
the great man!
- 178. "Shocking! Jean-Jacques (age 5) tries
to fly but hangs himself on curtain cord."
- 179. JULY 23
- 180. "Naked, she lay there dead,
her dying husband beside her."
- 181. Dorothy.
- 182. Money.
- 183. lt slips right through your fingers.
- 184. Am l disturbing you?
- 185. Not at all, Doctor.
- 186. l knocked several times.
l thought you might be asleep.
- 187. Sit down.
- 188. You went to Paris last night?
- 189. l never left Versailles.
- 190. l hope you didn't do anything
foolhardy on your first time out.
- 191. Don't worry, Doctor.
- 192. l was with a lady,
- 193. like a good little schoolboy.
- 194. Well done. Fine. Excellent.
- 195. Make up for lost time.
- 196. Once you leave here -
- Are you throwing me out?
- 197. Not at all!
l'm delighted to have you here.
- 198. But you've been fully cured
for quite some time now.
- 199. l can't keep you here
- 200. Doctor, l'll start again.
- 201. lf l leave, l'll start drinking again.
Sooner or later.
- 202. What else can l do?
- 203. No news from America?
- 204. There won't be any.
There's no connection.
- 205. There is. Be patient.
- 206. l am patient.
- 207. l've done nothing but wait.
- 208. All my life.
- 209. Waiting...
- 210. for something to happen.
- 211. For what, l don't know.
- 212. Now you do.
- 213. You love your wife
and she loves you.
- 214. That's what you think.
Because that suits you.
- 215. You insisted l write to her.
- 216. Dorothy knows l'll never make it.
- 217. But you have made it.
- 218. - l haven't, and you know it.
- l can see it.
- 219. lt won't last.
- 220. Wait for her letter.
- 221. lt could come any day now.
- 222. She won't answer, l tell you!
- 223. She can't have believed me.
- 224. When we married two years ago,
l swore l'd stop.
- 225. As if l could.
Especially in New York.
- 226. You're on the right track now.
- 227. You still have feelings of anxiety?
- 228. lt's not feelings of anxiety, Doctor.
- 229. lt's a single feeling
of constant anxiety.
- 230. lf you hang on a while longer,
- 231. it will gradually let up.
- 232. A matter of willpower.
- 233. A contradiction, Doctor.
- 234. How can you talk
about my willpower?
- 235. That's where my sickness lies.
- 236. That's what you're treating.
- 237. You weren't always this way.
- 238. What do you mean?
- 239. You were in the army.
You went to war.
- 240. As an officer.
- Leave that alone.
- 241. There's no connection.
- 242. Send her a telegram.
- 243. Tell her to take the next plane.
- 244. Take her down south.
Or somewhere else.
- 245. Anywhere but Paris.
- 246. American women are strong and healthy.
She'll help you forget.
- 247. Don't worry.
- 248. l'll be gone by the end of the week,
come what may.
- 249. As you like.
- 250. What about your shop idea?
- 251. Selling prewar objects,
- 252. '37 World Fair-style.
- 253. A good idea.
- 254. You see me running a store?
- 255. l'm drowning in debt.
- 256. l can see l'm wearing you out.
- 257. What about our game?
- 258. We can play tomorrow.
- 259. Get some rest.
- 260. Life is good.
- 261. Good for what, Doctor?
- 262. Tomorrow.
- 263. Life...
- 264. flows too slowly in me.
- 265. So l speed it up.
- 266. l set it right.
- 267. Tomorrow l kill myself.
- 268. Good morning.
- 269. l brought your breakfast.
- 270. Hand me my bathrobe.
- 271. You're in a rush today.
- 272. - l'm going out.
- 273. To Paris
- 274. city of orgies,
which l left for good -
- 275. When will you be back?
- 276. l won't be long.
- 277. l have to cash a check
see some old friends -
- 278. And come in at dawn.
- 279. The doctor asked me
to remind you about the telegram.
- 280. For your wife.
- 281. l was just thinking about it.
- 282. Telegram.
- 283. "Await your letter
- 284. with impatience.
- 285. "... with patience and hope. Stop."
- 286. More blunt.
- 287. "Thank you
- 288. for your silence. Stop.
- 289. You have a lover
- 290. in Versailles. Stop."
- 291. Why not shake her up a bit?
- 292. "Send reply.
- 293. Stop.
- 294. Need you. Stop.
- 295. Minutes count. Stop."
- 296. No, reassure her.
- 297. "Disregard this letter.
- 298. Stop.
- 299. Worries over.
- 300. Stop.
- 301. Be happy."
- 302. Sure, more like that.
- 303. "Worries over. Be happy."
- 304. My letter? Throw it away.
It's meaningless now.
- 305. Sure, l have plans.
- 306. To take a trip.
- 307. What?
- 308. No, l won't come to New York.
- 309. Don't worry.
- 310. Yes, l'm cured.
- 311. Lydia must have told you.
- 312. She told you everything?
- 313. For New York! It's urgent?
- 314. Telegrams usually are.
- 315. A pack of Sweet Aftons, please.
- 316. What's that?
- 317. lrish cigarettes.
- 318. We don't carry 'em.
- 319. You should.
- 320. Not enough demand.
- 321. l'm asking.
- 322. One's not enough.
The stock would go bad.
- 323. Too bad.
A pack of Luckies, then.
- 324. A glass of white.
- 325. Going to Paris?
- 326. Would you give me a lift?
- 327. lt's against regulations.
- 328. l'll buy you a drink.
- 329. This one's on me.
- 330. To your health.
- 331. - What are you having?
- Nothing, thanks.
- 332. You have to drink with us.
- 333. l don't drink.
- 334. You work in Versailles?
- 335. l don't work.
- 336. Private income?
- 337. l'm sick.
- 338. So that's why.
- 339. What?
- 340. Why you look so pale.
What's the problem?
- 341. My heart.
- 342. Don't you mind not having money?
- 343. Well, l mind.
- 344. But you look well-off.
- 345. l only look it.
- 346. Florence, look who's here!
- 347. Mr. Alain! You haven't changed.
- 348. - You put on weight, maybe.
- You're looking good.
- 349. You just got in?
- 350. Do you like America?
- 351. You live in New York?
- 352. Does Mr. Bernard still live here?
- 353. No, he left.
Not long after you did.
- 354. Leaving already?
- 355. - l want to use the bar phone.
- You can phone from here.
- 356. l must see Charlie.
- 357. Poor guy. He's really changed.
- 358. And his voice -
did you notice his voice?
- 359. - Mr. Leroy, of all people!
- Hello, Charlie.
- 360. l was talking about you
just yesterday with René.
- 361. "The Beach" bartender
in Monte Carlo. He's in town.
- 362. We made a bet
about where you were.
- 363. l bet you were still in America.
- 364. l lost.
But l'm real glad to see you.
- 365. The usual Scotch Sour?
- 366. You serious?
It was your first drink of the day.
- 367. "To tune up," you'd say.
- 368. Mr. Lavaud, please.
- 369. This is Alain Leroy.
- 370. Say hello from Charlie.
Tell him he's a quitter.
- 371. He never comes in now.
Married men are all the same.
- 372. ls Mrs. Leroy with you?
- 373. She stayed in America?
- 374. Yep, Mr. Lavaud is a quitter.
- 375. When Mr. Castellotti is in town
he always stays here.
- 376. We remember old times.
- 377. "That sweet Alain," he says.
He worships you.
- 378. He lives in Milan now.
- 379. Married, two cute little girls.
- 380. He showed me photos.
- 381. He comes for business
and a bit of fun on the side.
- 382. The other day he brought in
this gorgeous brunette, a stripper.
- 383. Fine. Tonight at 8:00.
- 384. Do you want a coffee?
- 385. No, l'm late.
- 386. Call me tonight at 7:00.
- 387. A beer, Charlie.
- 388. What time did you get in?
- 389. Late, Charlie, very late.
- 390. Or early, if you prefer.
- 391. Got some Alka-Seltzer?
My head's bursting.
- 392. The Minvilles don't answer.
- 393. - They're not home.
- Why not?
- 394. Because they're in prison.
- 395. Algeria again?
- 396. The war's over
but not for the Minville brothers.
- 397. Don't you remember me?
- 398. We met at the Pamplona feria
five or six years ago.
- 399. You were with an American girl.
- 400. l was only a kid then.
- 401. Then l was called up,
and you left Paris.
- 402. - Is Francis down yet?
- Not yet.
- 403. l'll get him up.
- 404. Who's that?
- 405. Nice guy. He lives in the hotel.
- 406. The room l used to have.
- 407. He's my successor.
- 408. Hardly!
We've put a plaque on the door:.
- 409. "Here, for several years,
lived Alain Leroy."
- 410. Those were the days.
- 411. Not like today.
- 412. l didn't ask how you were.
- 413. You don't look too good.
- 414. l've been ill
but l'm better now.
- 415. You don't look it.
- 416. Problems?
- Not really.
- 417. l've been in a Versailles clinic.
- 418. For how long?
- 419. Four months.
- 420. Leaving tomorrow?
- 421. For New York?
- 422. You didn't touch it.
- 423. l don't drink anymore.
Not a drop.
- 424. lf l'd known -
- 425. l always said you drank too much.
- 426. You used to say,
"Funny thing for a barman to say!"
- 427. Poor boy.
He was so full of life.
- 428. - And depression, too.
- But never for long.
- 429. l don't have any change.
- 430. Never mind. Keep the change.
- 431. Are you nuts?
- 432. What a dope!
- 433. ls Mr. Dubourg in?
- 434. Now?
They just sat down to lunch.
- 435. Who is it, Chantal?
- 436. lt's Alain.
- 437. Comrade Dubourg.
- 438. l was expecting you.
- 439. Liar.
- 440. Faveur, say hello to Alain.
- 441. Now run along.
Tell Mommy to come in.
- 442. Playing Daddy now?
- 443. l do lots of things now.
- 444. - Still into Egyptology?
- More than ever.
- 445. l sensed it in you
from the start.
- 446. l remember catching you in bed
with a blonde, your back to her,
- 447. your nose buried
in a book on esoterics.
- 448. Yes. While dissipating my youth
in St. Tropez, l studied Kabbala.
- 449. You still find it fun?
- 450. l don't find it fun.
l find it interesting.
- 451. Remember the famous Alain
you stole me from?
- 452. Alain's staying for lunch.
- l shouldn't.
- 453. Set another place, Fanny.
- 454. lt's done. Lunch is served.
- 455. You never wrote or phoned,
but we knew where you were.
- 456. La Barbinais told me.
- 457. l call him occasionally
to ask about you.
- 458. How good of you.
- 459. But he wouldn't let me visit.
- 460. Total isolation.
- 461. l was tired.
- 462. The cure was rough,
especially after New York.
- 463. - It has nothing to do with NY.
- Yes, it does.
- 464. lt's no place for us.
- 465. lt's like a crazy whirlpool.
- 466. l love New York.
- 467. Fascinating, but hard to live in.
- 468. People disappear into the city
like drug addicts.
- 469. l felt good there.
It wasn't home.
- 470. l always felt like a visitor.
- And Paris?
- 471. Pretty much the same,
but l prefer New York.
- 472. People leave you alone.
- 473. - Why come back, then?
- For treatment.
- 474. Why not there?
- 475. Dorothy had seen enough of me.
- 476. She knows you're cured?
- 477. She's been told.
- 478. And you - do you know it?
- 479. l feel it.
- 480. You feel completely sterilized,
body and soul.
- 481. That's something.
- 482. ln "sterilized" there's "sterile."
- 483. You're telling me.
- 484. Do you like Françoise Hardy?
- 485. Who, then?
- 486. Sylvie Vartan.
- 487. Who's that?
- 488. A teen idol.
- 489. You forget population growth,
- 490. Young people today are hopeless.
- 491. Good-looking, elegant, well-fed.
- 492. They're all alike,
like California oranges.
- 493. But you know nothing about them.
- 494. Have you worked at all?
- 495. l'd been keeping a diary lately.
- 496. Of no interest whatsoever.
l tore it up today.
- 497. How are you now?
- 498. Feeling empty.
- 499. With some atrocious moments.
- 500. Can you hold out?
- 501. Hold out? It's all over for me.
- 502. l'm leaving.
- 503. Don't you understand?
- 504. Life still has things to offer.
- 505. You must have
a sense of your life.
- 506. That sense can't perish.
- 507. l hate things
that stay locked up.
- 508. A man's got to show
what he's made of.
- 509. Doing something well is wonderful.
- 510. l never knew what that meant.
- 511. l've only run after money,
- 512. like everybody else.
- 513. Then you would've worked or stolen.
- 514. No, what you call money
is an excuse for daydreaming.
- 515. Go on. L don't want
to spoil your pleasure.
- 516. What l love about man
is not his passions,
- 517. but what those passions produce.
- 518. ldeas. Gods.
- 519. Where do you see passions here?
- 520. You got me wrong.
- 521. Don't judge by appearances.
- 522. You see me
as a resigned bourgeois.
- 523. But my life's more intense now
- 524. than when l drank
and slept around.
- 525. l'll end up writing a book
- 526. on the virtues of ancient Egypt.
- 527. They run in my blood.
- 528. Others will learn from it.
- 529. The sun -
- 530. you can touch it.
- 531. Come to Egypt with us.
Those people have the sun inside them.
- 532. Let's take a walk, prophet.
- 533. The Minvilles are different.
- 534. They're addicted to action.
- 535. Do you ever see Eva?
- 536. l don't see her or the others.
- 537. You're harsh for a happy man.
- 538. Does your life satisfy you?
- 539. lt doesn't matter.
- 540. What if you get bored?
- 541. Fanny and her daughters,
- 542. that musty apartment -
- 543. they're part of my passion.
- 544. And the old glint in your eye?
- 545. Your superb energy?
- 546. l'm older.
- 547. Really!
- 548. Yes, l'm older. The hopes are gone,
but l have certainties now.
- 549. l left my youth for another life.
- 550. You turn your back.
You reject adulthood.
- 551. You're stuck in adolescence.
- 552. Hence your anxiety.
- 553. lt's hard to be a man.
- 554. You have to want it.
- 555. Aren't you sick of mirages?
- 556. l can't stand mediocrity.
- 557. You've spent the last 10 years
in gilded mediocrity.
- 558. And l've had enough.
l'm calling it a day.
- 559. l refuse to grow old.
- 560. You miss your youth
as if you'd lived it to the fullest.
- 561. lt was a promise. And a lie.
- 562. l was the liar.
- 563. You're tormented
by the idea of women.
- 564. l have no power over them.
- 565. That's a laugh.
- 566. l was handsome at 20.
- 567. They still find me fun and nice.
- 568. But it's not enough.
l have no hold on them.
- 569. And yet, it's only through women
- 570. that l've felt some hold on life.
- 571. lt's not life itself l blame
- 572. but what's contemptible in it.
- 573. How did all this start?
- 574. lf l knew, maybe l could help you.
- 575. Alcohol was in my blood
before l realized it.
- 576. What do you mean?
- 577. l started to drink
while waiting for things.
- 578. Then one day l realized
l'd spent my life waiting.
- 579. For women.
- 580. Money.
- 581. Action.
- 582. So l drank myself stupid.
- 583. But you had Dorothy,
and a lot of others.
- 584. l never had them.
l don't have them now.
- 585. You've got Dorothy. You don't have
to sleep with her to prove it.
- 586. l don't.
l wasn't a good lover.
- 587. She fled your drinking.
- 588. l drink because l'm a bad lover.
- 589. Funny lives we lead,
clinging to women.
- 590. You don't seem to cling to Fanny.
- 591. l wallow in her warmth
like a pig in a trough.
- 592. She makes you want
to touch her.
- 593. Paris is like her, and so is life.
- 594. You and your mediocre certainties!
- 595. Let that mediocrity be enough.
- 596. You'll recover some of your verve.
- 597. You're spineless. And weak.
- 598. And lazy.
- 599. Certainties frighten you.
- 600. You defend the shadows
since the sun hurts your eyes.
- 601. Are you my friend?
- 602. lf you are my friend,
take me as l am. Not otherwise.
- 603. Let me look at you.
- 604. l wanted you to help me die.
- 605. That's all.
- 606. Promise to come see us again.
- 607. We lead an organized life.
- 608. You can write.
- 609. Move in tomorrow.
- 610. Dubourg,
what will you do tonight?
- 611. l'll write a few pages
on my Egyptians...
- 612. then make love to Fanny.
- 613. l fall into her silence
as into a well.
- 614. At the bottom is a great sun
that warms the earth.
- 615. Alain, l work.
- 616. l'm patient.
- 617. Come Iive with us.
You'll see what patience is.
- 618. Alain, I love Iife.
- 619. What I love in you
is thati rreplaceable thing...
- 620. the Iife inside you.
- 621. You look like death warmed over.
- 622. You're no spring chicken yourself.
- 623. You have lovely eyes.
- 624. You choose your friends.
You hang out with healthy people.
- 625. You go to see Dubourg again.
That deadbeat Dubourg.
- 626. Manners, manners.
- 627. How's your American witch?
- 628. New York?
- 629. Yes, we have amazing friends.
- 630. They think time changes them.
- 631. So they run around like mad,
not knowing what they're doing.
- 632. Having children, making deals,
- 633. Or else they kill themselves.
- 634. Or they get mystical, like Dubourg.
- 635. The party's over.
- 636. The bastards talk about sincerity
and go about their grubby lives.
- 637. - And you?
- 638. Abandoned, ruined
- 639. utterly devastated...
- 640. l never change.
l never try to understand.
- 641. Sleep is all l believe in.
- 642. You have changed.
You work now.
- 643. Painting? My one weakness.
- 644. The only one?
- 645. And Carla? Where is she?
- 646. She got herself killed.
It was last year in a car accident.
- 647. Along with some fool.
- 648. lt's absurd.
- 649. You can stay here if you like.
- 650. Thanks, but l'm leaving.
- 651. l came to say good-bye.
- 652. You too?
- 653. Disaster, honey!
The stove's died on us.
- 654. That's Urcel. L warn you,
he's a real chatterbox.
- 655. Detoxification. A strange thing.
- 656. Why do we pretend
to go into detox, dear God!
- 657. Out of kindness.
- 658. To make a few
worried friends happy.
- 659. So as not to leave poor mankind
alone with its misery.
- 660. Shut up, Urcel.
- 661. You went into detox
because you were afraid of dying.
- 662. Wrong.
- 663. We poets have no need for drugs
- 664. to attain the borderline
between life and death.
- 665. What brought me
back to drugs, in fact,
- 666. was the love of risk in our blood.
- 667. Where do you find death,
- 668. the madness in all this?
- 669. Drugs are life.
- 670. just like life.
- 671. Nice system you have
to put your mind at rest.
- 672. Some addicts live to be 70.
- 673. All you risk is deadening your mind.
- 674. lt's all right for you to talk.
- 675. Urcel is taking a huge risk.
He has to produce his work.
- 676. Oh, please, my dear.
- 677. His work... more alibis.
- 678. You poor man,
you have no sense of such things.
- 679. You're empty inside.
- 680. What a boor!
- 681. He's become unbearable.
- 682. Basically he's a failure,
and an envious one.
- 683. Nonsense.
- 684. He's a very sweet guy...
- 685. and he's deeply unhappy.
- 686. l shouldn't have let him go.
- 687. Don't worry.
- 688. He may be unhappy,
but he won't kill himself.
- 689. How do you know?
- 690. Just shut up.
- 691. l know you don't like me.
- 692. l just came for news about
Jerome Minville and his brother.
- 693. Try the Flore.
- 694. l hear you were in prison.
- 695. l was until last week.
- 696. lt's good to see you.
You don't look so good.
- 697. Pretty-boy Alain!
- 698. He says we need
some mountain air.
- 699. He hasn't changed a bit.
- 700. What did you do over in JFK-land?
Party a lot?
- 701. - l should've been with you.
- We did ask you.
- 702. Your plan was doomed
from the start.
- 703. Sure. History marches on.
- 704. They'll hear from us again.
We're stubborn, you know.
- 705. You won't give up?
- 706. Are you crazy?
- No. We're going skiing in Spain.
- 707. Alain Leroy...
an old pal from Algeria.
- 708. - And Left Bank dives.
- A fine officer in his day.
- 709. - A great friend.
- A bit of a drunk.
- 710. More than a bit.
Always with the ladies.
- 711. No political conscience.
- 712. - Not to be counted on.
- Too bad.
- 713. Carrying on with your plot now
is grotesque and stupid.
- 714. You haven't a chance.
- 715. You're just boy scouts.
- 716. You don't know
what you're talking about.
- 717. We're stubborn, l said.
- 718. When it's all over
- 719. we'll go on a binge,
just like old times.
- 720. Not living there anymore?
l thought you were.
- 721. No, l came back.
- 722. The humiliation of it all.
- 723. ln St. Tropez,
for the whole month of June!
- 724. What a madhouse!
- 725. lt was ten years ago.
The whole crowd was there, remember?
- 726. lt was something!
- 727. We told Coppi, the cyclist,
his girl had killed herself.
- 728. lt wasn't funny.
- 729. Once he hijacked
an American Express tourist bus
- 730. and gave them
a tour of the Ritz while talking
- 731. about Scott Fitzgerald.
- 732. See that face?
- 733. Alcohol.
- 734. He's done for.
- 735. A shame.
He was good-looking.
- 736. Richard was in love with him.
- 737. Go-kart racing
in the streets of Paris!
- 738. He organized it.
It drove the cops nuts.
- 739. Look out!
- 740. Are you all right?
- 741. Mr. Leroy!
- 742. - Come dry off.
- Don't worry.
- 743. You're soaked.
- 744. l'm not feeling well.
- 745. l'm early.
- 746. l fainted in the street.
- 747. Lie down until dinner.
- 748. You've got time.
- 749. Brancion won't be here
before 10:00. As usual.
- 750. You know Brancion?
- 751. No. L mean, yes.
Don't we all?
- 752. He's a big man nowadays.
He's the talk of the town.
- 753. That loudmouthed intellectual
- 754. Him and his strongman act.
- 755. Don't speak ill of strongmen.
- 756. l'll be up later.
- 757. Ring if you need anything.
- 758. Let him sleep.
- 759. l know what happened.
- 760. The first drink after detox
makes you very sick.
- 761. And then?
- 762. Then it's all right,
- 763. Poor Alain.
- 764. lt's nice to see him again.
- 765. You're looking
ugly today, Ma Ubu.
- 766. The peace of mind of these people!
- 767. Nobody would touch the story.
- 768. The Anglo-American press
has more guts.
- 769. Excuse me.
- 770. What did my mother
always say when l was late?
- 771. "Alain, you'll start
with the current course."
- 772. Sit down.
- 773. You know everyone?
- 774. l don't think you've met Brancion.
- 775. Marc, may l present a revenant,
- 776. An old friend of Cyrille's,
and an old flame of mine.
- 777. Hong Kong is overrated.
- 778. Oriental eroticism
based on my own little experience,
- 779. is nothing like what they say.
- 780. But there's Chinese erotica.
- 781. There's nothing erotic about it.
- 782. Eroticism is a Western invention
a Christian concept
- 783. based on ideas of good and evil,
- 784. transgression and original sin.
- 785. These concepts don't exist there.
- 786. l'm not hungry, Louis.
- 787. l'll just have cheese.
- 788. Young as ever.
- 789. We've met before.
- 790. On Long Island,
at the Fairmans'.
- 791. How is Dorothy?
- 792. l don't really know.
- 793. l hear she's happy.
- 794. l said something
l shouldn't have?
- 795. Not really.
- 796. Chinese libertines
- 797. are pure hedonists
for whom love is a pleasure
- 798. which they seek to refine.
- 799. lt's something esthetic,
- 800. whereas for us it's a concept.
- 801. My friend Alain can't take
his eyes off you.
- 802. Let me tell you a story.
- 803. A famous one.
- 804. One day,
at 7:00 in the morning,
- 805. a policeman finds,
sleeping the sleep of the dead drunk,
- 806. a young man lying
on the Tomb of the Unknown Soldier.
- 807. The said young man,
- 808. sure he was home in bed
- 809. had laid his watch
wallet, and handkerchief
- 810. next to the memorial flame
as if it were a night table.
- 811. Who was the hero of our tale?
- 812. Alain Leroy, here present.
- 813. Brancion doesn't like drunks.
- 814. He has a bad liver.
- 815. l heard in New York
you were getting divorced.
- 816. Mental cruelty?
- 817. Who's that?
- 818. François Mignac,
a model Parisian.
- 819. ln bed at 3:00 a.m.
Riding from 9:00 to 11:00.
- 820. Then off to the stock exchange,
to win or lose a quick million.
- 821. Business lunch.
- 822. Some time at the office.
- 823. A few drinks.
- 824. Dinner out. A nightclub.
Then he starts over again.
- 825. Twenty years,
and he still loves it!
- 826. lt's nice to see you.
- 827. We've missed you.
- 828. You're sweet.
- 829. Once he gets his divorce.
- 830. Good for you. That's true love!
- 831. This is all new.
- 832. l've never felt this way.
- 833. And you know me.
- 834. A woman in love.
- 835. Do l know him?
- 836. No. He never goes out.
- 837. But you'll meet him.
He's coming to pick me up.
- 838. So that's the fabulous
Iegendary, irresistible Alain Leroy.
- 839. Harlequin, Watteau,
- 840. Don't be mean.
- 841. He's not himself tonight.
- 842. Say something nice to him.
- 843. lt would wound him even more.
- 844. We could help each other.
- 845. Give me a call.
- 846. Do you have my number?
- 847. Corrupting a minor.
- 848. Your husband's crazy,
giving Alain a drink.
- 849. A shame you don't get along
- 850. He's irritating, but he's someone.
- 851. ls he?
- 852. Go on. Shoot him down!
- 853. A man of many parts.
- 854. A good sport.
- 855. Wears his dentures with confidence.
- 856. Has had every woman here tonight.
- 857. Except Solange.
- 858. A real Martian!
- 859. l envy his serenity.
- 860. Get off my back!
- 861. l'll do as l like!
- 862. Cyrille...
- 863. your Piranesis are superb.
- 864. The best prints l've ever seen.
- 865. l admire what you do.
- 866. Because you don't believe in it.
- 867. You're wrong.
l damn well do.
- 868. l just want to say, sir...
- 869. that like you,
l don't find it funny
- 870. to sleep on a tomb...
- 871. when it's so easy to open it
and sleep inside.
- 872. That's all.
- 873. Forgive me.
l never get drunk,
- 874. and l hate stories about drunks.
- 875. l'm a poor drunkard.
- 876. Liquor is stupid.
- 877. We drunks are poor cousins...
- 878. and we know it.
- 879. Anyway,
- 880. we fade away fast.
- 881. Alain, you're too far gone.
- 882. l'm not gone yet,
but l'm going.
- 883. l have to go. L'm late.
- 884. As it happens, l'm a man.
But l've never had money or women.
- 885. Yet l'm very active.
- 886. The thing is...
- 887. l can't reach out with my hands.
- 888. l can't touch things.
- 889. And when l do touch things,
- 890. l feel nothing.
- 891. Come say hello to the Filolies.
- 892. l'd like you to meet Frédéric.
- 893. And you, sir?
- 894. Do you believe in your actions?
- 895. l don't like talking about myself.
- 896. Then you don't like talking.
- 897. l enjoy listening to you.
- 898. You believe in Maria?
- 899. Congratulations on finding Maria.
- 900. You have a woman.
- 901. l have nothing.
- 902. Come now!
- 903. You don't know what it's like
- 904. being unable to touch anything.
- 905. l'm incapable of wanting.
- 906. l can't even desire.
- 907. The women here tonight...
- 908. l can't desire them.
- 909. They scare me.
- 910. Scare me!
- 911. Take Solange, for instance.
- 912. Five minutes with her
and l'd feel like an insect.
- 913. l'd vanish into the woodwork.
- 914. What's wrong, Alain?
You're a bit tipsy.
- 915. And so sad.
What is it now?
- 916. You're life itself.
- 917. Yes, life.
- 918. But l can't touch you.
- 919. You're here in front of me
but there's no way.
- 920. So l'll try with death.
- 921. She should be
- 922. Life is strange.
- 923. You're a beautiful woman.
A good woman.
- 924. You love making love.
- 925. And yet...
- 926. between the two of us
- 927. To leave without having
- 928. Beauty. Goodness.
- 929. All their lies.
- 930. You can work miracles.
- 931. Touch the leper.
- 932. lt's a matter of timing
- 933. between a man and a woman.
- 934. And your beauties -
Dorothy, Lydia and the others.
- 935. They're lovely.
They adore you.
- 936. Not lovely enough.
Not good enough.
- 937. They've gone.
- 938. They're waiting for you.
- 939. They love making love as much as l do.
- 940. Things well done.
- 941. That's it.
- 942. Things well done.
- 943. l'm leaving.
- 944. Stay with us. Talk to me.
- 945. l'll be back.
- 946. But l have to go now.
- 947. Without a word.
- 948. You'll be back?
- 949. - Need any money?
- l'm loaded.
- 950. Let's lunch tomorrow
and we'll talk.
- 951. Good-bye, Alain.
We're very fond of you.
- 952. Good-bye, Solange, Cyrille.
- 953. Don't forget:. Iunch tomorrow.
- 954. Cyrille has a hold on Solange.
- 955. He's a good lover,
and he's worth millions.
- 956. Brancion hasn't much of a chance.
- 957. When l was 18
and fairly good-looking,
- 958. my first mistress cheated on me.
- 959. Eighteen is an age
for being two-timed.
- 960. At 18 or at 30.
They're always nice,
- 961. but they all leave
or they let me go.
- 962. You really surprise me.
Call it what you will,
- 963. but you attract them.
- 964. l'm awkward, inept.
- 965. The sensitivity was in my heart,
- 966. not my hands.
- 967. When you care about people,
Milou, they're nice.
- 968. They give you everything.
- 969. Love.
- 970. Money.
- 971. You must make people feel
you want them
- 972. and that you'll hold on to them.
- 973. You're sensitive, Milou
but you don't want them.
- 974. l don't love them.
- 975. l never could love them.
- 976. l can't touch. L can't take.
- 977. lt has to come from the heart.
- 978. What is it you wanted?
- 979. l'd have liked
to captivate people,
- 980. hold on to them
- 981. bind them close.
- 982. So that things would stay still
- 983. But it always went to hell.
- 984. You really love people
- 985. l wanted so much to be loved...
- 986. that l feel l do love.
- 987. Want some breakfast?
- 988. No, thanks.
- 989. l'm not to be disturbed
- 990. ls that you, Alain?
- 991. Did l wake you?
- 992. Solange.
- 993. Dearest Alain, l'm calling
to remind you about lunch.
- 994. We're expecting you without fail.
Don't be late.
- 995. We'll have a nice chat.
- 996. How are you today?
- 997. Not bad.
- 998. With that tone of voice?
Can we count on you?
- 999. Sure you can.
- 1000. That's sweet of you.
- 1001. l care for you.
- 1002. You care for me.
- 1003. And Brancion?
- 1004. Brancion is your opposite.
- 1005. He's a force of nature.
- 1006. And you like forces of nature?
- 1007. l like all sorts of people.
- 1008. l'm not a force of nature.
- 1009. You have heart.
- 1010. l don't understand any of this.
- 1011. Good-bye, Solange.
- 1012. Solange answers for Dorothy.
- 1013. l'm killing myself
because you didn't love me,
- 1014. because l didn't love you.
- 1015. Because our ties were loose
- 1016. l'm killing myself to tighten them.
- 1017. l leave you
- 1018. with an indelible stain.