1. Mommy and Daddy
will be right next to you.
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2. The lights will go down.
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3. There may be some organ music
as the curtain opens.
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4. Don't be scared.
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5. It'll be dark in there,
you said.
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6. - I don't want to go in.
- But it's fun.
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7. All week,
you've been so excited.
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8. Your first ever movie.
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9. - And the people are gigantic.
- What people?
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10. You said the people
in the movie are gigantic.
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11. Oh, because of
the big screen they're on,
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12. but they're not real, uh, right?
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13. - They're like dreams.
- Dreams are scary.
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14. Some dreams are, but this is
gonna be a nice dream.
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15. About a circus and clowns
and acrobats and, um...
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16. You want to know how it works?
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17. There's a big machine
called a projector.
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18. Inside, there's
a big bright light,
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19. and it projects photographs
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20. - of-of clowns and acrobats.
- And elephants.
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21. - Uh, "projecting" means it
sends them out. -Happy things.
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22. Happy things like light
from a huge flashlight.
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23. But these photographs move past
the light really fast.
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24. 24 photos in every second.
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25. Now, in your brain,
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26. each photograph stays
for about a 15th of a second.
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27. That's called
persistence of vision.
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28. The photographs move past
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29. faster than your brain
can let go of them,
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30. and that's how
the movie projector tricks us
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31. into believing that
motionless pictures are moving.
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32. A motion picture.
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33. Movies are dreams, doll,
that you never forget.
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34. You just wait and see.
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35. When it's over,
you're gonna have
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36. the biggest, sloppiest smile
on your face.
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37. - They're letting us in.
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38. Wait till the engines pass.
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39. - Unlock the door.
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40. Pass it down.
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41. - What's that?
- Second section.
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42. Angel. She's on that train.
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43. So what? We got the
dough. Let's get out of here.
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44. Lights. I must turn the lights
down the track.
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45. You crazy lunkhead.
Give me that wheel.
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46. We are going to—
down the track!
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47. The train! Stop the train!
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48. Stop the train!
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49. Stop! Can't you see the lights?
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50. Stop!
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51. First section! Hold it!
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52. - Angel! Angel!
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53. What was your favorite part?
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54. Sammy, what do you want
for Hanukkah?
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55. I told you
this wasn't a good idea,
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56. what with all of his
A-N-X-I-E-T-I-E-S.
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57. Kids his age have big
I-M-A-G-I-N-A-T-I-O-N-S.
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58. No fair spelling out
the long words.
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59. The lights change
how everything looks.
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60. It's hard to find our house.
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61. Ours is the dark house
with no lights.
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62. That's what I want for Hanukkah.
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63. - What?
- Christmas lights!
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64. Sorry, dolly.
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65. Jews don't get Christmas lights.
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66. Eight nights of candlelight.
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67. Can I sleep
with the oscilloscope?
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68. Get going.
We got to burn rubber.
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69. - What's that?
- Second section.
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70. Angel. She's on that train.
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71. - The lights.
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72. I must turn the lights
down the track.
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73. - Stop the train!
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74. Stop the train!
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75. - Angel!
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76. Mommy! Mommy!
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77. I know what I want for Hanukkah!
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78. I know what I want
for Hanukkah!
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79. Hanukkah!
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80. Thank you!
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81. Sammy.
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82. - Oh, my God.
- Whoa.
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83. I'm so excited.
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84. Okay, so the outside grounds,
the middle conducts the power,
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85. and these two metal wheels
under the engine
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86. complete the circuit.
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87. So, new, Mr. Engineer?
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88. RCA gave you a raise?
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89. That is
one expensive trolley car.
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90. It's not a trolley car.
It's a Lionel train.
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91. No raises for the computer guys
this year.
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92. Next year, maybe.
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93. Your moonlighting son
is paying for it
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94. by filling up my house
with broken TVs.
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95. Repair work, that's how.
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96. Oy, careful he doesn't
electrocute himself.
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97. - Hold on.
- You're okay.
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98. You're not taking that fancy
train to Florida without me.
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99. Hey, look.
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100. She's down on the floor.
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101. Who's gonna help her up?
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102. Who says I'm getting up?
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103. I'm going to Miami
on the Sammy Limited.
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104. Go ahead.
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105. - Ooh.
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106. I precisely engineer toys.
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107. You can play with them
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108. when you've learned
to treat them with respect.
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109. I do respect them. I love them.
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110. I know you do, but you can't
just love something.
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111. You also have to
take care of it, right?
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112. Maybe we can play together
with them this weekend.
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113. But I need to see them crash.
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114. I don't understand.
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115. Why does he need
to see them crash?
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116. It's late.
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117. You don't want
to shut your light?
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118. Mm. In a minute.
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119. I'm still wide-awake.
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120. You see these descending notes?
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121. That's called a lament bass.
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122. You should play it on the radio
on that arts program.
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123. - Oh. -They keep
asking you to go back.
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124. I don't have time for that. Mm.
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125. Well, we can hire a sitter.
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126. Who can afford that? Forget it.
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127. That was another life.
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128. That was two kids ago.
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129. You know what I miss most
about the piano?
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130. Surrendering to the score.
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131. Knowing Bach is
gonna tell you how—
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132. First this note,
then this chord,
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133. then you open your hand,
you stretch down an octave...
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134. Making a little world
you can be safe and happy in.
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135. Thank you.
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136. That's why he needs
to watch them crash.
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137. He's trying to get
some kind of control over it.
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138. Sammy?
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139. We're going to use
Daddy's camera to film it.
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140. Only crash the train once, okay?
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141. Then, after we get
the film developed,
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142. you can watch it crash
over and over
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143. till it's not so scary anymore.
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144. And your real train
won't ever get broken.
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145. One more thing, dolly.
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146. Let's not tell your father.
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147. It'll be our secret movie,
just yours and mine.
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148. - Okay?
- Okay.
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149. Sorry I'm late.
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150. I picked up
Ms. Moynahan's Motorola.
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151. There's no room left
in the workshop.
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152. - Where should I put it?
- The living room, I guess?
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153. Okay.
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154. Hey, uh, sorry I'm late.
I picked up Mrs. Fabelman.
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155. Where should I put her?
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156. Ow! Ow, ow, ow.
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157. - Did the mail come?
- It's on the table.
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158. Cossack.
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159. - This is brisket?
- My movie!
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160. Ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah.
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161. After supper.
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162. The amount of magnetism
is increased by
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163. how magnetically permeable
the core material is.
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164. The tricky thing is
how permeable we can make it.
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165. Am I supposed to be
following any of this?
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166. You know what
a magnetic field is, right?
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167. Uh, yeah. Well, sure.
I mean, it...
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168. Sammy, do you know
what a magnetic field is?
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169. - Can I be excused?
- Nope.
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170. But I need to,
just for a minute.
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171. - What's so urgent?
- Honey.
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172. This tastes funny, Burt.
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173. It tastes funny
on a plastic fork.
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174. - Ma.
- Is she saving the silverware
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175. for when the Eisenhowers
drop by?
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176. The problem is
we're using vacuum tubes,
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177. not transistors,
and magnetic cores
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178. - to try to access memory...
- 35,000 magnetic cores.
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179. Hey, Sam, you know
on your father's camera
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180. when the film runs out?
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181. When that happens,
what do you do?
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182. - Load more film.
- The same with computers.
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183. You have to load more tape, and
that slows everything down...
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184. Mitz, the chopped liver
was beyond belief.
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185. - ... load it with data,
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186. and instead of changing tapes
every ten seconds,
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187. this new machine
he's engineering...
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188. - The BIZMAC!
- The BIZMAC!
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189. It can search for information
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190. through all these tapes at once.
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191. You never need
to change any of them.
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192. It'll be ten times faster.
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193. I love Burt's brain.
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194. Especially when you're around
to explain what's in it.
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195. Mom, I have to go upstairs now.
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196. Not until
you've finished eating.
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197. He cleaned his plate.
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198. No, he didn't.
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199. - Sammy.
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200. Hey, Natalie, I think there's
something under your plate.
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201. - Sammy.
- No, there isn't.
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202. Lift it up and check.
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203. I saw it moving.
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204. Licorice.
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205. If there's anything
I'm a sucker for,
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206. it's licorice.
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207. Uncle Bennie,
that was so disgusting!
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208. - No, no!
- Natalie, he is not your uncle.
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209. Also, he is not that funny.
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210. Oh, "uncle" is a term
of affection.
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211. Natalie, he's not related.
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212. He's only always here
because he works for my son.
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213. He's only always here because
he's my best friend.
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214. And deep down inside you,
Mrs. Fabelman,
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215. admit it, I'm your friend, too.
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216. Deep down inside of me
is none of your business.
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217. Sid Caesar's on tonight.
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218. Help me.
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219. - Natalie, get that corner.
- What?
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220. Get the corner. Get the corner.
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221. Can I help you take it out?
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222. Sammy.
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223. I had to crash it
a whole lot of times,
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224. - but the train never got hurt.
- Golly.
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225. I thought that was
The Greatest Show on Earth.
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226. Oh, more,
more, more, more, more.
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227. Head back. Open.
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228. - Ah.
- Candy corn in.
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229. - Say, "Ah."
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230. Head back.
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231. - Ketchup. Okay.
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232. Scream like it hurts.
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233. Pull it!
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234. Sammy!
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235. Oh.
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236. Take off the blindfolds.
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237. Sammy?
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238. Reggie, Natalie,
come downstairs pronto.
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239. Your father has an announcement.
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240. General Electric
wants to hire me
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241. because of what I did on BIZMAC.
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242. They want to use my
electronic library system to—
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243. Well, I-I don't think
they have any notion
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244. of what I can do with it.
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245. And I'll make more money.
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246. Is Uncle Bennie coming, too?
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247. Well, D-Daddy and me
haven't had a chance to think
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248. - about Uncle Bennie, but...
- Bennie, no. He lives here.
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249. Burt.
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250. I'll miss
your Uncle Bennie, too,
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251. but Phoenix is a real neat city.
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252. It's on the rise.
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253. They've only just hired me.
I've got no pull there yet.
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254. I can't ask General Electric
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255. to hire somebody else
on my say-so.
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256. - That's not how it works.
- Don't ask them.
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257. Do it yourself.
They're hiring you to manage.
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258. Managers hire. Hire Bennie.
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259. Uh, who's watching— Sammy!
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260. - He's got to make a name for
himself at RCA. -
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261. - Come here. Come here.
- That's what I did.
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262. He'll stay in New Jersey,
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263. get out from
under my shadow and then...
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264. There's a tornado outside!
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265. Yeah, well,
there's a bigger one in here.
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266. Honestly, honestly, Burt,
sometimes I want to shake you.
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267. You're-you're gonna leave him
behind with just a-a shrug?
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268. Mommy! Mommy!
Mommy! Mommy! Mommy!
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269. "We'll see ya later."
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270. And once we're gone, who will
he have left in New Jersey?
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271. You have an opportunity
to help your best friend.
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272. - Mommy, look!
- Mommy! Mommy!
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273. - Honestly, wake up.
- Mom! Mom!
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274. - What? -Look!
There's a tornado outside.
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275. - I'm scared.
- Just go.
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276. Wow! Ah!
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277. Oh!
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278. You weren't kidding!
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279. How close is it?
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280. Why does the sky look orange?
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281. Come on!
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282. Come on. Let's go see.
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283. - Get in, get in!
- Get in!
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284. Mitz? Where are you going?
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285. Mitz, where are—
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286. - Hey!
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287. Where are you going?
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288. Mitz!
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289. Mitzi!
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290. Where is it?
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291. - I can't see it anymore.
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292. Up ahead somewhere.
We'll find it.
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293. Mom, it's there. It's there!
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294. - Is this s-safe?
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295. Of course it's safe.
I'm your mother.
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296. Mom, stop!
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297. Everything happens for a reason.
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298. Everything happens
for a reason.
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299. Everything happens for a reason.
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300. Say it with me.
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301. Everything happens
for a reason.
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302. Everything happens for a reason.
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303. Everything happens
for a reason.
Copy !req
304. Everything happens for a reason.
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305. I think there's
something dead in the road.
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306. - Reggie, wave in the camera.
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307. - Ooh, look.
- There it is!
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308. - There it is. Wow.
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309. Whoa!
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310. Let me out. I want to take
a shot of him pulling in.
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311. - No!
- No, I have to pee now!
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312. Me, too! Now! No!
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313. No! I have to pee!
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314. - Keep coming.
- No!
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315. Keep coming, Dad.
You're doing great.
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316. And...
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317. Stop.
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318. Freeze.
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319. - Where's the lunch box?
- Wow.
Copy !req
320. Where's the lunch box? Hurry!
Copy !req
321. Guys, look at the monster
Sammy caught.
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322. I got the babies.
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323. - Sal found babies.
- Look at that.
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324. Sammy, Dean, come on.
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325. There's a huge nest right there.
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326. - Come on, guys.
- A big one, Sammy.
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327. - Oh, God.
- Oh!
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328. It's a whole herd of 'em.
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329. Scorpions come in nests.
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330. No, actually,
it's a bed of scorpions.
Copy !req
331. - No, it's a nest.
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332. The baby scorpions
are called "scorplings."
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333. They're twice as venomous.
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334. That's-that's why
the lab pays more.
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335. There's got to be
like 50 of 'em.
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336. Well, how much is the
laboratory gonna pay for them?
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337. 50 cents per baby.
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338. - That's 25 bucks!
- We're rich. -
Copy !req
339. Well, what are we gonna buy?
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340. 12 dollars even.
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341. Well, it's the merit badge
for photography, not movies.
Copy !req
342. The manual says you got to tell
a story with still pictures.
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343. Yeah, but all a movie is
is still pictures.
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344. You just put a bunch of them
together and they move.
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345. Okay, but what kind of movie
are we making?
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346. Ooh. Sammy, look.
It's Janet Benedict.
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347. Hey, go on and talk to her.
I dare you.
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348. He already talked to her.
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349. - No way.
- Like hell.
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350. No way.
He actually spoke to her?
Copy !req
351. He did. He did.
He walked right up to her.
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352. - And he...
- You went up to Janet Benedict?
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353. - What did you say to her?
- Nothing.
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354. Oh, come on.
Tell them what happened, Sammy.
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355. Nothing happened.
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356. Something happened. Come on.
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357. Could be the same one.
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358. "Overland." Say, I think
it is the same one.
Copy !req
359. Well, I declare.
Copy !req
360. So, uh,
Copy !req
361. Sammy kind of sidewinds his way
in her direction.
Copy !req
362. And he's trying to, um...
he-he's trying to work up
Copy !req
363. the nerve to say something
slick and smooth like,
Copy !req
364. - "Hey, Jan, baby."
- No, I wasn't.
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365. - You're making this up.
Copy !req
366. But-but he sees that Janet's
got something on her nose.
Copy !req
367. So now he's thinking, "Cool.
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368. Here's my excuse to go up
and talk to her."
Copy !req
369. So he goes and he says, "Hey,
uh, sorry, Janet.
Copy !req
370. It-it looks like you have
a little smudge on your nose."
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371. - Shut up, Hark.
- But it wasn't a smudge.
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372. - It looked like a smudge.
- And it wasn't little.
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373. Hark, shut up!
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374. - It was a booger!
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375. A big, fat,
Copy !req
376. - Janet Benedict booger.
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377. It was huge.
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378. Hey, Sammy.
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379. Stand and deliver.
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380. What kind of movie
are we gonna make?
Copy !req
381. Stand and deliver.
Copy !req
382. No, keep screaming.
Keep screaming.
Copy !req
383. I need more dust. Dad, can you
grab the sandwich board?
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384. No, no. God, no,
no more dust. No.
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385. Reggie, stop coughing!
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386. - I'm coughing
because there's dust. -Okay.
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387. - More dust, fellas. -Natalie,
say, "Please don't kill me."
Copy !req
388. - All right.
- Reggie, stop coughing.
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389. You're being dramatic.
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390. Mr. Fabelman, you're getting
dirt inside my stagecoach.
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391. Don't you want me
to be dramatic?
Copy !req
392. - Don't look into the camera.
- Well, we'll clean it out.
Copy !req
393. Guys, stop looking
into the camera.
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394. - I can't use any of this.
- Dad!
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395. Fake.
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396. Totally fake.
Copy !req
397. - You hear it?
Copy !req
398. She has got to cut
those goddamn fingernails
Copy !req
399. before she goes
on live television.
Copy !req
400. - I have to perform this
tomorrow. -
Copy !req
401. It's a difficult piece.
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402. It's a very big deal for me.
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403. All I asked was for you
to keep your big traps shut
Copy !req
404. and listen
to my dress rehearsal.
Copy !req
405. Sorry, Mitz. It's wonderful.
Copy !req
406. You hear how
the rising arpeggios
Copy !req
407. - lift up the sad notes?
Copy !req
408. It's in F minor, but your mom
makes it sound so alive.
Copy !req
409. She makes it sound like
she's playing a typewriter.
Copy !req
410. Oh, no.
Copy !req
411. Not this again.
Copy !req
412. Do you hear it? Am I clicking?
Copy !req
413. I concentrate
on your playing, but...
Copy !req
414. Bu— Oh, great. But what?
Copy !req
415. But people can hear it
in Tucson.
Copy !req
416. - Maybe I've gotten used to it.
Copy !req
417. Maybe GE should make
Copy !req
418. rubber tips for fingernails.
Copy !req
419. All right, Mitzi Fabelman.
Copy !req
420. Time to face the music.
Copy !req
421. - Oh, boy.
Copy !req
422. You stay away from me
with those things.
Copy !req
423. - It's Beethoven, damn it.
- No, no, no!
Copy !req
424. - It is not Morse code. Come on.
- No! Stop! Stop! Stop it!
Copy !req
425. He has a point, though,
especially with
Copy !req
426. the polydirectional
ribbon microphones
Copy !req
427. - they have on television
stage... -
Copy !req
428. Come on. You married her.
Copy !req
429. Dad, don't.
Copy !req
430. Do it. Do it.
Do it. Do it. Do it!
Copy !req
431. I will scratch you.
Don't think I won't!
Copy !req
432. Do you think Arthur Rubinstein
Copy !req
433. - had fingernails?
Copy !req
434. - Horowitz? Schnabel?
- Do not think about it.
Copy !req
435. - Kempff?
- No, no, no.
Copy !req
436. - Liberace.
- No, no, no, no.
Copy !req
437. - Not my nails.
- Come on, Fabelman.
Copy !req
438. Show her
who's General Electric's
Copy !req
439. - product design manager.
- No, my beautiful nails.
Copy !req
440. I paid a buck 50
at the beauty parlor for these.
Copy !req
441. Oh, no.
Copy !req
442. - One, two, three.
Copy !req
443. Get off of me, Delilah.
Copy !req
444. - Delilah?
- Okay, the fun's over.
Copy !req
445. I'll do the rest myself.
Copy !req
446. Oh.
Copy !req
447. Oh, great.
Copy !req
448. Just great.
Well, that decides it.
Copy !req
449. I'm gonna play the program
from memory tomorrow.
Copy !req
450. No sheet music, short nails,
like a real performing artist.
Copy !req
451. Did you drop your gun?
Copy !req
452. Come on.
Copy !req
453. That's me.
Copy !req
454. Real scary, Sheriff.
Copy !req
455. - Whoa.
Copy !req
456. - Whoa.
Copy !req
457. H-How'd you do that?
Copy !req
458. How'd you do that?
Copy !req
459. - Whoa!
Copy !req
460. Go, Sammy!
Copy !req
461. It's kind of like what I do,
isn't it,
Copy !req
462. what a movie director does?
Copy !req
463. - It is?
- I figure out
Copy !req
464. what my division
needs to accomplish,
Copy !req
465. then I work out how my guys
are gonna get it done.
Copy !req
466. Yeah, it is. Yeah, sort of.
Copy !req
467. How'd you make it look like
the guns were really firing?
Copy !req
468. I did it with pins.
Copy !req
469. Pins.
Copy !req
470. Yeah, I poked holes
in the film with pins.
Copy !req
471. - Sammy.
- Yeah.
Copy !req
472. Thinking like an engineer.
Copy !req
473. Watch the road, Dad.
Copy !req
474. Sammy, watch the road.
Copy !req
475. I can't edit
without an editing machine.
Copy !req
476. I have to be able
to cut and splice, and I...
Copy !req
477. Let's revisit it
after the camping trip.
Copy !req
478. It's three hours
to the national forest.
Copy !req
479. If you get your license,
you can help with the driving.
Copy !req
480. Okay.
Copy !req
481. "You are approaching
a railroad crossing
Copy !req
482. "with no warning devices
and limited visibility.
Copy !req
483. The speed limit is..."
Copy !req
484. See, the thing is, though,
about my new movie,
Copy !req
485. is that it's just...
Copy !req
486. It's about World War II,
your war.
Copy !req
487. It's gonna be, like,
out of this world.
Copy !req
488. I'm shooting on a Bolex H8.
Copy !req
489. Finally, I can use
double run film.
Copy !req
490. You know, that's six minutes
Copy !req
491. without having to
change the reel.
Copy !req
492. How much did you spend
to rent this camera?
Copy !req
493. - 20 bucks. But I used
my own money. -
Copy !req
494. - You don't have to...
Copy !req
495. And this movie editor
gizmo costs?
Copy !req
496. It's a Mansfield
eight millimeter movie editor.
Copy !req
497. How much?
Copy !req
498. - 80 bucks.
- Doggone it, Sammy!
Copy !req
499. A hundred dollars for a hobby?
Copy !req
500. It's not a hobby, Dad.
Copy !req
501. If you spent half the time
on algebra that you spend on
Copy !req
502. - these movies, you could get...
- Algebra? I hate algebra.
Copy !req
503. Why are you...
Copy !req
504. It's completely pointless.
Copy !req
505. Not if you want to make
something, it's not pointless.
Copy !req
506. Gee, Sammy, when I was a boy,
I always used to think,
Copy !req
507. - "Somebody figured out
how to make this." -Yeah.
Copy !req
508. - This car...
- Uh-huh.
Copy !req
509. that rearview mirror,
that directional signal.
Copy !req
510. I want to make movies, though.
Copy !req
511. I mean something real.
Copy !req
512. Not imaginary.
Copy !req
513. Something someone can
actually use.
Copy !req
514. Like a driver's license.
Copy !req
515. I'm gonna vomit, Sammy!
I'm gonna vomit!
Copy !req
516. Sammy, please pull over.
Copy !req
517. She's gonna puke all over me.
Copy !req
518. —Go slower.
You are the worst driver.
Copy !req
519. You're gonna break the car.
Copy !req
520. We're on a back road going
three miles per hour.
Copy !req
521. - Calm down.
- You're doing great, doll.
Copy !req
522. You're doing very well.
Copy !req
523. Okay, watch out.
Puddle up ahead.
Copy !req
524. - So we've got three
Copy !req
525. that are strong and still green
inside, so they don't burn.
Copy !req
526. Bright green means
that they're still alive
Copy !req
527. and that they carry moisture.
Copy !req
528. And the reason that we use
the shape of the triangle
Copy !req
529. is that when
these three points connect,
Copy !req
530. if we find the center
of gravitational force,
Copy !req
531. it creates
almost perfect balance.
Copy !req
532. - Whew. Oh. -Because I'm Tutti,
and you're Frutti.
Copy !req
533. So who else
are you gonna listen to?
Copy !req
534. Okay.
Copy !req
535. - ... the pyramids, right?
Copy !req
536. - Guys, come on!
- I mean, the history
Copy !req
537. - behind this shape...
Copy !req
538. - Ah. Oh!
- ... is pretty in—
Copy !req
539. - is pretty incredible.
Copy !req
540. Oh, hello!
Copy !req
541. - Uh...
- Hi!
Copy !req
542. Wait. Let me try it...
Copy !req
543. - Let me try it like this.
- Okay, one more time.
Copy !req
544. - Yeah, after one more time.
- Okay.
Copy !req
545. - Ready?
- Hey.
Copy !req
546. Girls, I'm gonna start the fire!
Copy !req
547. - Three, two, one!
- Okay. Really big, really big!
Copy !req
548. - Go! Whoa!
Copy !req
549. I thought it was gonna break.
Copy !req
550. Oh. It's-it's happening!
Copy !req
551. You almost broke it in half.
Copy !req
552. - Heart attack!
Copy !req
553. - We'll take a schvitz
and have a... -
Copy !req
554. - Shmitz.
- And eat some...
Copy !req
555. Schnitzelpitz.
Copy !req
556. - And drink slivovitz.
- And we'll lose our wits.
Copy !req
557. - And we'll get the shits!
- And have...
Copy !req
558. - Whoa!
Copy !req
559. —Wait.
Copy !req
560. - Exactly!
Copy !req
561. They're gonna know
that kind of FPU
Copy !req
562. is not for
industrial process control,
Copy !req
563. and it will raise
every red flag there is.
Copy !req
564. - How many bits?
- Float64.
Copy !req
565. 64 bits?
Copy !req
566. Sixty— You are nuts.
Copy !req
567. And time-sharing
for 11 operators?
Copy !req
568. They're gonna know
this is a business machine
Copy !req
569. - we're building, and we're
all gonna get fired. -
Copy !req
570. No.
Copy !req
571. Yes!
Copy !req
572. GE doesn't build
business computers.
Copy !req
573. We do heavy industry processing.
Copy !req
574. You got that
straight from the CEO.
Copy !req
575. Ralph Cordiner is gonna
skin you alive.
Copy !req
576. Once Bank of America buys in,
this will be profitable,
Copy !req
577. and that's Mr. Cordiner's job,
making money.
Copy !req
578. My job is getting Raytheon
Copy !req
579. to deliver
10,000 germanium transistors
Copy !req
580. that meet
our tolerance standards.
Copy !req
581. And your job is to get
the cabling diagrams
Copy !req
582. to Pitney Bowes
so when the time comes,
Copy !req
583. we have a sorter to hook up
to the mainframe.
Copy !req
584. Well, maybe Pitney Bowes
will hire me
Copy !req
585. after you get us both
canned from GE.
Copy !req
586. Isn't it worth getting canned
Copy !req
587. for the chance to build
a machine that can do all that?
Copy !req
588. It's worth it to you, maybe!
Copy !req
589. Sure as the Lord made
little green apples,
Copy !req
590. California, here you come.
Copy !req
591. IBM is waiting.
Copy !req
592. Are we moving to California?
Copy !req
593. - You are, any day now.
- No, no, no.
Copy !req
594. What?
Copy !req
595. IBM's asking,
and that's flattering, but...
Copy !req
596. Flattering?
Flattering!
Copy !req
597. Every guy in computer
would give his matzo balls
Copy !req
598. to get an offer.
Copy !req
599. You'll be in California
Copy !req
600. building double-precision
auxiliary units with an FP64.
Copy !req
601. I'm gonna be left
schvitzing in Arizona
Copy !req
602. - making 40-watt light bulbs.
- Hold your horses.
Copy !req
603. - Congruence? Come on. -I told
your mom it'll be up to her.
Copy !req
604. I'm not uprooting us again
unless she says yes.
Copy !req
605. Why would Mamaleh ever leave
all of this for California?
Copy !req
606. - We have the Grand Canyon.
Copy !req
607. They have the
San Andreas Fault.
Copy !req
608. Mamaleh says...
Copy !req
609. I will never leave Arizona,
Copy !req
610. and Arizona will never leave me.
Copy !req
611. Kids, avert your eyes.
Copy !req
612. - Hey, man.
- Hmm?
Copy !req
613. - Shouldn't you be filming this?
- Not enough light.
Copy !req
614. GE, living better electrically!
Copy !req
615. Mom?
Copy !req
616. Mom, everyone can see
through your dress. Um...
Copy !req
617. Reggie, get out of the way.
Copy !req
618. Dad, can you please stop this?
Copy !req
619. - Come. Sit.
- No.
Copy !req
620. Bennie, don't look!
Copy !req
621. - Oh! You're all nuts!
Copy !req
622. My mama's such a good mama.
Copy !req
623. I love you so much.
Copy !req
624. I'm right here.
Copy !req
625. I'm right here with you.
Copy !req
626. I'm holding your hand.
Copy !req
627. Can you feel that, Mama?
Copy !req
628. I just gave you a squeeze.
Copy !req
629. I love you, Mama.
Copy !req
630. Ma.
Copy !req
631. Mommy?
Copy !req
632. She opened her eyes.
Copy !req
633. Nurse.
Copy !req
634. Mommy, I'm here.
Here. I'm right here.
Copy !req
635. I'm right here, Mama.
Copy !req
636. Mommy, look at me.
Copy !req
637. Mommy, can you hear?
Copy !req
638. Oh.
Copy !req
639. Oh, oh...
Copy !req
640. It's a Mansfield
eight millimeter movie editor.
Copy !req
641. That's what you wanted, right?
Copy !req
642. Oh, my God.
Copy !req
643. Uh, now I need a favor
in return.
Copy !req
644. Okay. Okay, okay, okay.
Copy !req
645. - Here's the favor.
Copy !req
646. Yeah.
Copy !req
647. I want you to make
a camping trip movie.
Copy !req
648. Uh, you can learn
Copy !req
649. how the editing machine works
while you do this.
Copy !req
650. It'll make your mom feel better.
Copy !req
651. Yeah.
Copy !req
652. That last night when she danced
in the headlights,
Copy !req
653. that'd be great.
Copy !req
654. Get to it tomorrow, okay?
Copy !req
655. Um, tomorrow's
when we start shooting.
Copy !req
656. Escape to Nowhere.
Copy !req
657. We're shooting all weekend, Dad.
Copy !req
658. - I can't.
- Shoot it next weekend.
Copy !req
659. We've got like 40 guys
coming to be in the movie.
Copy !req
660. I'll-I'll w-work on all the
camping trip stuff on Monday.
Copy !req
661. I'm asking you to do this now
for your mom. She's...
Copy !req
662. Yeah, and I said that I will,
just not tomorrow, please.
Copy !req
663. Don't be selfish.
She just lost her mother.
Copy !req
664. That's more important
than your hobby.
Copy !req
665. Dad, can you stop
calling it a hobby?
Copy !req
666. It'll cheer her up,
watching this.
Copy !req
667. - It's something we can do to...
- Her mom just died.
Copy !req
668. How is that gonna cheer her up?
Copy !req
669. Because you made it for her.
Copy !req
670. Uh, something's not right.
Copy !req
671. I don't know what else to do.
Copy !req
672. Can you help me?
Copy !req
673. Hello.
Copy !req
674. Mitzi. Mitzi.
Copy !req
675. Mama?
Copy !req
676. Somebody's coming.
Copy !req
677. Mama?
Copy !req
678. M-Mama. What...
Copy !req
679. - Mama. Mam...
- You mustn't let him in.
Copy !req
680. - You mustn't let him in.
- Mama, I-I can't hear you.
Copy !req
681. I am scared.
Copy !req
682. You mustn't let him
in the house.
Copy !req
683. Mama, please. I...
Copy !req
684. Do not let him in.
Copy !req
685. - Do not let him in the house.
- What? No, I can't—
Copy !req
686. Wh-Who's coming?
Copy !req
687. Don't open the door.
Copy !req
688. Mama.
Copy !req
689. Mommy, don't go.
Copy !req
690. Don't go yet.
Copy !req
691. - You're having
a bad dream. -
Copy !req
692. - This is a lot of food, Mom.
Copy !req
693. Well, I'm upset.
Copy !req
694. Oh, my God. That crazy dream.
Copy !req
695. I can't get it out of my head.
Copy !req
696. Uh, last night, I dreamed
I got a call from my mama.
Copy !req
697. And she wanted to warn me.
Copy !req
698. - That's silly. Grandma died.
- About what?
Copy !req
699. Well, something's coming.
Copy !req
700. She wants me
to batten down the hatches.
Copy !req
701. We're never going to be able
to eat all of this.
Copy !req
702. Who is that?
Copy !req
703. It's Uncle Boris.
Copy !req
704. Hmm?
Copy !req
705. Uncle who?
Copy !req
706. Mom?
Copy !req
707. That's who she meant!
Copy !req
708. My—
That's my-my mama's brother!
Copy !req
709. Oh, he scared the crap
out of her when they were kids!
Copy !req
710. - Don't let him in!
Copy !req
711. You were in the circus?
Copy !req
712. Mama said you were
the lion tamer.
Copy !req
713. No, not at first.
Copy !req
714. At first, it was, "Podgorny,
pound in the tent pegs.
Copy !req
715. Podgorny, muck out the
pachyderms."
Copy !req
716. And then, one night,
the big cat act,
Copy !req
717. he comes down with the flu bug,
so it was, uh,
Copy !req
718. "Boris Podgorny,
in with the lions."
Copy !req
719. - He's lying, right?
Copy !req
720. - No, he's telling you a story.
- Know what it's like, huh?
Copy !req
721. Pain in the ass, sisters.
Copy !req
722. - That's rude.
- He said "ass"!
Copy !req
723. I know.
Copy !req
724. But when did you start
working in the movies?
Copy !req
725. 1927.
Copy !req
726. 1927— that was The Jazz Singer.
Copy !req
727. That's the year
that talkies started.
Copy !req
728. Yeah, sure, talkies. But me, no.
Copy !req
729. I started with, um,
Uncle Tom's Cabin.
Copy !req
730. Not a talkie.
Copy !req
731. It was Harry Pollard.
Copy !req
732. He acted for Selig Polyscope.
Copy !req
733. He, uh, married
Maggie what's-her-name.
Copy !req
734. - Mm-hmm.
- He directed Uncle Tom.
Copy !req
735. Lift up your plate.
Copy !req
736. So, Pollard needed help
with the bloodhounds.
Copy !req
737. So, my pal Fleischaker was
a big name in dog acts.
Copy !req
738. - Poodles, mainly.
Copy !req
739. But, "Sure,"
Fleischaker says to Pollard.
Copy !req
740. "Yeah. Bloodhounds, poodles,
what's the difference?"
Copy !req
741. Ooh.
Copy !req
742. So, he went.
Copy !req
743. But, uh, by this time,
uh, Fleischaker,
Copy !req
744. he had it up to here
with the Jew-haters.
Copy !req
745. There was a lot of that kind
in the circuses.
Copy !req
746. Not many Jews,
lots of Jew-haters.
Copy !req
747. - Right.
- But the movies...
Copy !req
748. Oy vavoy!
Copy !req
749. Fleischaker writes to me,
"Boris," he writes.
Copy !req
750. "Boris," he writes,
Copy !req
751. "Hollywood is heimish, heimishe.
Copy !req
752. I'm in a minyan with Douglas
Fairbanks and Ricardo Cortez."
Copy !req
753. - Whoa.
- "Come to Hollywood."
Copy !req
754. So, I went.
Copy !req
755. Your wife, she don't like
doing the dishes?
Copy !req
756. Uh, piano hands.
Copy !req
757. Ah, fershteyn.
Copy !req
758. So, you like the movies,
huh, Mr. Pitselshas?
Copy !req
759. Okay, so the sergeant,
he comes over the hill here,
Copy !req
760. and I'm gonna go below him,
so we see him and the sky.
Copy !req
761. And so we don't see
what he sees,
Copy !req
762. but we do see that he's really—
Copy !req
763. Okay, so he's, like,
almost losing his mind, right?
Copy !req
764. - Mm-hmm. -'Cause what he is
seeing is totally terrible.
Copy !req
765. And then, I'm gonna turn
the camera so that we see it.
Copy !req
766. It's just in another notebook.
Hang on.
Copy !req
767. If that's the movie, uh...
Copy !req
768. you could show me instead of
describing me to death.
Copy !req
769. No, that's just
our stupid camping trip.
Copy !req
770. My dad's...
Copy !req
771. He wants me to put
this camping film together
Copy !req
772. so it'll cheer up Mom.
Copy !req
773. Because her heart is broken.
Copy !req
774. Because her mama iz toyt.
Copy !req
775. But you, Mr. Director,
you don't want to do this,
Copy !req
776. what your daddy tells you,
Copy !req
777. because you want to make
your war picture, huh?
Copy !req
778. Yeah, yeah.
Copy !req
779. Believe me, Sammy boy, I get it.
Copy !req
780. Family, art.
Copy !req
781. It'll tear you in two.
Copy !req
782. You hear that?
Copy !req
783. Oh, yeah. My mom's practicing.
She's always...
Copy !req
784. Sha. You talk too much. Listen.
Copy !req
785. When she was a kid,
already she played like that.
Copy !req
786. She should have been
a concert piano player.
Copy !req
787. Little Rubinstein, she was.
Copy !req
788. She could have played...
Copy !req
789. You name it,
she could have played there.
Copy !req
790. And she...
Copy !req
791. Once, I visited her and Tina
and Menashe in Cincinnati,
Copy !req
792. and she says to me she wants
to be a great piano artist.
Copy !req
793. But she didn't do it.
Copy !req
794. Yeah, she's really good.
You know, she played on TV.
Copy !req
795. TV? Feh!
Copy !req
796. She could have played
at Musikverein in Vienna.
Copy !req
797. You see,
what she got in her heart
Copy !req
798. is what you got, what I got.
Copy !req
799. Art.
Copy !req
800. Like me. Like you, I think.
Copy !req
801. We're junkies,
and art is our drug.
Copy !req
802. Family, we love.
Copy !req
803. But art, we're meshuga for art.
Copy !req
804. You think I wanted to leave my
sisters, my mama and my papa,
Copy !req
805. and go stick my stupid head
in the mouth of lions?
Copy !req
806. Put-Putting your head
in-in a lion's mouth is art?
Copy !req
807. No. Sticking your head in
the mouths of lions was balls.
Copy !req
808. Making sure the lion
don't eat my head, that is art.
Copy !req
809. You see, Tini,
she didn't say to Mitzi,
Copy !req
810. "Go do what you gotta."
Copy !req
811. I mean, she was a good person,
my sister, but she was scared.
Copy !req
812. Scared for your mother.
Copy !req
813. - She should have safety
in the family. -Uh...
Copy !req
814. So Mitzi, she gave it all up.
Copy !req
815. Ow! Wh...
Copy !req
816. I want you should remember
how that hurt.
Copy !req
817. Because when they say all this,
when they say, "What you do?
Copy !req
818. "Oh, that's cute. It's a hobby.
Copy !req
819. It's like stamps
or butterfly collecting,"
Copy !req
820. you feel your face,
how it feels now.
Copy !req
821. Yeah, you almost pulled it off.
Copy !req
822. So you remember your Uncle Boris
Copy !req
823. and what he's telling you.
Copy !req
824. Because you're going to join
the circus, I can tell.
Copy !req
825. You can't hardly wait.
Copy !req
826. You want to be in the big top.
Copy !req
827. You'll shovel elephant shit
until they say,
Copy !req
828. "Okay, Sammy,
now ride the goddamn elephant."
Copy !req
829. Oh, you love those people, huh?
Copy !req
830. Your sisters, your mama,
your papa. Except...
Copy !req
831. Except this.
Copy !req
832. This, I think you love
a little more.
Copy !req
833. No, I don't.
Copy !req
834. Yeah.
Copy !req
835. Oh, hey.
Run all you want, boychick,
Copy !req
836. but you know I ain't
whistling Dixie here.
Copy !req
837. You'll make your movies,
and you will do your art.
Copy !req
838. And you'll remember how it hurt.
Copy !req
839. So you know what I'm saying?
Copy !req
840. Art will give you crowns in
heaven and laurels on earth.
Copy !req
841. But...
Copy !req
842. it'll tear your heart out
and leave you lonely.
Copy !req
843. You'll be a shanda
for your loved ones.
Copy !req
844. An exile in the desert.
Copy !req
845. A gypsy.
Copy !req
846. Art is no game.
Copy !req
847. Art is dangerous
as a lion's mouth.
Copy !req
848. It'll bite your head off.
Copy !req
849. Look at me.
Copy !req
850. Look at me.
Copy !req
851. Is it a wonder that Tini, she
wanted nothing to do with me?
Copy !req
852. With me, with—
Copy !req
853. Oh, Tini.
Copy !req
854. Oh, Tini! Oh, Tini.
Copy !req
855. I...
Copy !req
856. Stop, stop! Stop it!
Copy !req
857. What, you never saw
nobody grieving before?
Copy !req
858. Let's go to sleep, bubbala.
Copy !req
859. Uh, you can sleep in the bed.
I have my sleeping bag.
Copy !req
860. I'm sitting shiva for my sister.
Copy !req
861. I sleep on the floor.
Copy !req
862. Y-You want to sleep
on the floor, too?
Copy !req
863. - She was your grandma.
Copy !req
864. Tear your clothes.
Sleep on the floor.
Copy !req
865. Good night.
Copy !req
866. - Say "bye-bye."
- Bye-bye.
Copy !req
867. Bye-bye.
Copy !req
868. I don't know what Mama
was so worried about.
Copy !req
869. It was a nice visit.
Copy !req
870. Yuck.
Copy !req
871. - Whoa!
Copy !req
872. - Oh!
Copy !req
873. Aw.
Copy !req
874. This is the life.
Copy !req
875. Only you can prevent
forest fires.
Copy !req
876. Mm.
Copy !req
877. Oh.
Copy !req
878. It's so beautiful,
what you made, dolly.
Copy !req
879. You really see me.
Copy !req
880. Hey, man. How about that, huh?
Copy !req
881. Hey, Sammy, that was real neat.
Copy !req
882. Die, Amerikaner!
Copy !req
883. Move! Move! Fall backwards!
Copy !req
884. Whoa!
Copy !req
885. Attacke!
Copy !req
886. - Ah! Cover!
Copy !req
887. Krauts, they're everywhere!
Copy !req
888. There's too many of them!
Copy !req
889. Turn.
Copy !req
890. Cut!
Copy !req
891. Great. Now, um...
Copy !req
892. Okay, come here. Come here.
Copy !req
893. Um, you're standing here
a minute,
Copy !req
894. looking down
at what just happened.
Copy !req
895. - A whole minute?
- I'll give you a signal
Copy !req
896. when I want you to start
to move, okay? So you're just...
Copy !req
897. Like, you mean
I should count to 60?
Copy !req
898. - What? No. No, no, no, no.
- Like, one Mississippi,
Copy !req
899. two Mississippi, and then move?
Copy !req
900. Don't-don't count to 60.
Copy !req
901. You just got to...
Copy !req
902. S-S-So... So you're all
like-like-like,
Copy !req
903. "Oh, my God."
Copy !req
904. Like, "All my men,
they're all...
Copy !req
905. they're all dead.
All my men, they're-they're..."
Copy !req
906. So you want me to,
like, act and stuff.
Copy !req
907. Well... yeah.
Copy !req
908. - Like I'm-I'm sort of sad
or something? -Right.
Copy !req
909. - Um, that's the whole point.
- 'Cause my whole platoon...
Copy !req
910. R-Right, right. Your platoon.
Copy !req
911. Your... Your men!
Copy !req
912. They've been wiped out.
Copy !req
913. These guys, they're your family.
Copy !req
914. Your family's being,
Copy !req
915. - like, murdered,
Copy !req
916. and it's your fault.
Copy !req
917. You did this to them, and you...
Copy !req
918. I-I thought it was
the Nazis that...
Copy !req
919. Okay, yeah, but it was you
who gave the order
Copy !req
920. to go down into
the Valley of Death.
Copy !req
921. - Okay? You decided.
- Mm-hmm.
Copy !req
922. Nobody else. You could've...
Copy !req
923. Mm-hmm.
Copy !req
924. You could've protected them.
Okay?
Copy !req
925. 'Cause they trusted you,
and they loved you.
Copy !req
926. Mm-hmm.
Copy !req
927. Now you're just looking
at this...
Copy !req
928. at this thing
that you've done,
Copy !req
929. and... you can't
save them anymore.
Copy !req
930. Because they're all dead.
Copy !req
931. - Wow, that's, uh...
- Yeah.
Copy !req
932. real gung ho.
Copy !req
933. Okay. Okay.
Copy !req
934. - You good?
- Lock and load.
Copy !req
935. Yeah. Yeah. Lock and load.
All right.
Copy !req
936. Good.
Copy !req
937. Uh, Sammy?
Copy !req
938. How far are you
gonna let him walk?
Copy !req
939. Cut!
Copy !req
940. Hey, that's a cut, Angelo!
Copy !req
941. - Angelo!
- Angelo!
Copy !req
942. Come back! Come back!
Copy !req
943. - He said, "Cut!"
- Angelo, hey! -Angelo!
Copy !req
944. - Bravo!
Copy !req
945. Bravo!
Copy !req
946. Sammy!
Copy !req
947. Oh, dolly!
Copy !req
948. You're not a civilian anymore.
Copy !req
949. That movie, my God.
Copy !req
950. It was...
Copy !req
951. Hi, Mrs. Fabelman.
Copy !req
952. Mr. DeMille.
Copy !req
953. Come here.
Copy !req
954. - Hey, there he is.
- Congratulations, young man.
Copy !req
955. - Congratulations.
- Hey. Hey, hey.
Copy !req
956. I guess you based it on
your dad's war stories, huh?
Copy !req
957. Sort of.
You know, but he doesn't like
Copy !req
958. - to talk about it, so...
- No, I understand.
Copy !req
959. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah.
Copy !req
960. Dad, Mom's getting a ride
with Bennie.
Copy !req
961. She'll see us at home.
Copy !req
962. Hey, that last scene with the...
Copy !req
963. Why do you like blood so much?
Copy !req
964. And are you ever
gonna make a movie
Copy !req
965. with parts for girls again?
Copy !req
966. - Yeah.
- Make a career...
Copy !req
967. - With girls,
you know, like,
Copy !req
968. because all the men stare off
into the distance all the time,
Copy !req
969. maybe a girl could save the day.
Copy !req
970. Okay, what are the five steps
to save a drowning person?
Copy !req
971. All right, one is
you swim behind the person
Copy !req
972. so they don't grab you.
Copy !req
973. Two, you throw your arm
across his chest.
Copy !req
974. - Or her chest.
- Three.
Copy !req
975. Not Sammy. He's too scared
of girls' boobies.
Copy !req
976. —Three, you swim
on your back with the victim
Copy !req
977. on your chest, using your
free arm to paddle yourself.
Copy !req
978. And speaking of boobies,
if you ever get any,
Copy !req
979. we'll have a party. Um...
Copy !req
980. And at the party,
we'll give her the booby prize.
Copy !req
981. - Ha-ha. What's four?
Copy !req
982. Um...
Copy !req
983. - Crap.
Copy !req
984. Bring the victim to land, dummy.
Copy !req
985. - Mm.
- Then five?
Copy !req
986. Call the undertaker.
Copy !req
987. This is serious business.
Copy !req
988. I got to know all of this to
get the lifesaving merit badge.
Copy !req
989. More kids die
in swimming accidents
Copy !req
990. than in any other kind
of accident.
Copy !req
991. Sorry. I'm sorry.
Copy !req
992. Not everything is a big joke.
Copy !req
993. Okay, okay.
So what's step number five?
Copy !req
994. It's just—
You laugh at everything,
Copy !req
995. even when nothing's funny.
Copy !req
996. You always have to be
the center of attention.
Copy !req
997. Eat. And don't talk
with your mouth full.
Copy !req
998. I'm not eating this crud
before a swimming test.
Copy !req
999. You can get cramps in the water
if you eat before,
Copy !req
1000. and you can drown
from getting cramps!
Copy !req
1001. Stop shouting at her!
Copy !req
1002. Sammy Fabelman, goddamn it!
Copy !req
1003. For weeks now,
Copy !req
1004. it has been nothing
but disrespect from you!
Copy !req
1005. Disrespect?
Copy !req
1006. Why are you being
such a little shit to me?
Copy !req
1007. Damn it to hell,
I am your mother!
Copy !req
1008. I wish you weren't!
Copy !req
1009. Oh. Let me see.
Copy !req
1010. Oh, my God.
Copy !req
1011. Oh, what have I done?
Copy !req
1012. Talk to me.
Copy !req
1013. Oh, Sammy, please talk to me.
Copy !req
1014. Tell me what's happening.
Copy !req
1015. Do you have any idea
how much I love you?
Copy !req
1016. Don't go.
Copy !req
1017. Mom.
Copy !req
1018. Mom.
Copy !req
1019. I won't tell.
Copy !req
1020. I won't tell. I won't.
Copy !req
1021. - I won't tell.
Copy !req
1022. I won't.
Copy !req
1023. Sure about this?
Copy !req
1024. Mm-hmm.
Copy !req
1025. There you go.
Bought and paid for.
Copy !req
1026. Oh. Just a second.
It's in the back.
Copy !req
1027. Stocking up on Kodak
before the big move?
Copy !req
1028. N-No, I'm...
Copy !req
1029. Smart. Film's cheaper here
than in California.
Copy !req
1030. I bet everything's
more expensive there.
Copy !req
1031. You're losing
your steadiest customer.
Copy !req
1032. Him and his whole family,
they're moving west.
Copy !req
1033. He just sold me his camera.
Copy !req
1034. Oh, yeah? How come?
Copy !req
1035. Says he's finished.
Copy !req
1036. Sorry about the wait, Mr. Loewy.
Copy !req
1037. We had to order it special.
Copy !req
1038. You bought a camera?
Copy !req
1039. It's for you!
Copy !req
1040. I know how much you loved
using it for your war picture,
Copy !req
1041. so I figured you ought to have
one of your own.
Copy !req
1042. It's, um, a "bon voyage,"
"see you later, alligator,"
Copy !req
1043. "I believe in you" present
from your uncle Bennie.
Copy !req
1044. Because it's from me?
Copy !req
1045. This move? Huh?
Copy !req
1046. This is your dad's
glory-hallelujah moment.
Copy !req
1047. And, oy vavoy, Sammy,
does that guy ever deserve it.
Copy !req
1048. All the way back when,
back at RCA,
Copy !req
1049. he knew what computing
was gonna be about
Copy !req
1050. before practically
anybody else knew it.
Copy !req
1051. And IBM?
Copy !req
1052. That's where guys like Burt
are figuring out
Copy !req
1053. how to use what he's made to...
Copy !req
1054. They're gonna change
the whole goddamn world,
Copy !req
1055. so this was the right decision.
Copy !req
1056. For all sorts of reasons.
Copy !req
1057. Yeah, so I'm happy for you.
Copy !req
1058. You know I am.
Copy !req
1059. But I'm gonna miss you.
Copy !req
1060. All of you, a lot.
Copy !req
1061. You think whatever bad things
you want about me, kiddo,
Copy !req
1062. but you stop making movies,
Copy !req
1063. it'll break your mother's heart.
Copy !req
1064. You will break her heart,
I mean it.
Copy !req
1065. She doesn't deserve that,
not from anybody,
Copy !req
1066. least of all from you.
Copy !req
1067. I'll give you 35 bucks for it.
Copy !req
1068. You drive a hard bargain, kid.
Copy !req
1069. I'm still done
making movies, though.
Copy !req
1070. Everybody makes movies
in California.
Copy !req
1071. Hey!
Copy !req
1072. Keep the change.
Copy !req
1073. When will the new house
be finished?
Copy !req
1074. A few months, in the spring.
Copy !req
1075. Can I have my own room?
Copy !req
1076. Everybody gets their own room.
Copy !req
1077. - Yay!
- Yes!
Copy !req
1078. I just remembered, last night,
I had a funny dream.
Copy !req
1079. What was it?
Copy !req
1080. I-I can't believe
I dreamed this.
Copy !req
1081. Uh, uh, uh, Bennie and me
were having an argument,
Copy !req
1082. and I hauled off and socked him
right in the nose.
Copy !req
1083. What's wrong?
Copy !req
1084. Is Mommy carsick?
Copy !req
1085. Let's just give her
a little time.
Copy !req
1086. Bennie and me, we never...
Copy !req
1087. we never...
Copy !req
1088. I would never let it get
as far as I imagine you think.
Copy !req
1089. Oh, I never
imagined any of that.
Copy !req
1090. You think Dad knows?
Copy !req
1091. I don't... I don't mean...
Copy !req
1092. I don't mean,
"Did you tell him?"
Copy !req
1093. I know you didn't.
Copy !req
1094. But...
Copy !req
1095. But you think he has an inkling?
Copy !req
1096. I've almost told him
so many times.
Copy !req
1097. I'll say,
"Burt, there's something
Copy !req
1098. I've got to tell you."
Copy !req
1099. Then he looks at me
like he can't conceive
Copy !req
1100. that anything
could be wrong between us,
Copy !req
1101. so instead, I say,
"Burt, we got ants."
Copy !req
1102. Or, "Burt, could you climb
on the roof
Copy !req
1103. and turn the antenna
so I can watch channel 5?"
Copy !req
1104. Which, of course, he does.
Copy !req
1105. I can't fight with your father.
Copy !req
1106. He kills with such kindness.
Copy !req
1107. I'm mean to him,
he buys me a dress.
Copy !req
1108. From Saks.
Copy !req
1109. Mom, when I showed you
what I filmed,
Copy !req
1110. I never meant
for any of this to happen.
Copy !req
1111. Oh... mmm.
Copy !req
1112. Guilt is a wasted emotion.
Copy !req
1113. Hmm.
Copy !req
1114. What's gonna happen now?
Copy !req
1115. I'm gonna be your mom.
Copy !req
1116. I'm gonna be the girls' mom.
Copy !req
1117. Despite my countless faults,
Copy !req
1118. I'm not ruining everything
for everyone.
Copy !req
1119. I'm gonna not be selfish.
Copy !req
1120. Burt Fabelman is the kindest,
smartest, wisest,
Copy !req
1121. most patient, most decent,
Copy !req
1122. most understanding man there is,
Copy !req
1123. and I'm gonna stay married
to him.
Copy !req
1124. It's only a rental.
Copy !req
1125. The new house will be ready
Copy !req
1126. faster than you can say
"Jack Robinson."
Copy !req
1127. Jack Robinson.
Copy !req
1128. And we're still here.
Copy !req
1129. Just tell me if
you're going to mope
Copy !req
1130. for the rest of your life
Copy !req
1131. or if it's something
you plan to outgrow.
Copy !req
1132. Bug off.
Copy !req
1133. You're, like, going for
the misery merit badge,
Copy !req
1134. you and Mom
with your long faces.
Copy !req
1135. She can't even get out of bed
to make breakfast and...
Copy !req
1136. Okay, new rule, guys.
Copy !req
1137. Um, when we walk to school
in the morning,
Copy !req
1138. let's just leave
all the Fabelman mishegoss
Copy !req
1139. behind us in the Fabelmans'
moldy old rental house.
Copy !req
1140. So, for eight hours a day,
let's be normal kids
Copy !req
1141. in an ordinary,
normal school, okay?
Copy !req
1142. Some glue
on your hand or something.
Copy !req
1143. - Too easy.
- That's what I'm telling you.
Copy !req
1144. It's like we got parachuted
Copy !req
1145. into the land of
the giant sequoia people.
Copy !req
1146. All right.
Copy !req
1147. - Excuse me. Excuse me.
Copy !req
1148. - Up over! Nice dig.
Copy !req
1149. Atta Johnson.
Copy !req
1150. - I got it. I got it.
- Get it up. Get it up.
Copy !req
1151. - Oh!
- Set, set, set, set.
Copy !req
1152. - Hit it.
- Take it.
Copy !req
1153. I got it.
Copy !req
1154. Way to get up!
Copy !req
1155. - Nice.
Copy !req
1156. Nice. Attababy, Logan.
Copy !req
1157. Do it again. Go again.
Copy !req
1158. - Come on, boys.
Copy !req
1159. - Good work, guys.
Copy !req
1160. Keep the intensity. Keep moving.
Copy !req
1161. Rotate. Nice, Jake.
Copy !req
1162. Good job, Chris.
Copy !req
1163. Fabelman, it won't hurt you.
Copy !req
1164. It's a volleyball,
not a cannonball.
Copy !req
1165. - Okay. Let's go. Serve.
Copy !req
1166. Go!
Copy !req
1167. Attababy!
Copy !req
1168. That's good reactions.
Copy !req
1169. Let's move. Let's...
Copy !req
1170. Oh, my God, I am so sorry.
I didn't... Oh, my...
Copy !req
1171. I'm gonna murder you,
you piece of shit!
Copy !req
1172. Hey, Chad.
Copy !req
1173. Cool it.
Copy !req
1174. I am... I did not mean
to do that.
Copy !req
1175. - Are you okay? I'm...
- That really hurt, asshole.
Copy !req
1176. Watch your mouth, Logan.
Copy !req
1177. Go fetch the ball.
Copy !req
1178. Sure, yeah.
Copy !req
1179. - Let's go.
- Mm-hmm.
Copy !req
1180. Hey, new kid.
Copy !req
1181. What's your name?
Copy !req
1182. Sam.
Copy !req
1183. Sam what?
Copy !req
1184. Fabelman.
Copy !req
1185. Told you he's a kike.
Copy !req
1186. He doesn't like Jews.
Copy !req
1187. Nobody likes Jews.
Copy !req
1188. Except other Jews, right?
Copy !req
1189. So, Bagelman...
Copy !req
1190. No, that's not my name.
Copy !req
1191. - Don't call me that.
- So...
Copy !req
1192. you gave my best friend
a concussion, Bagelman.
Copy !req
1193. - No, I didn't. Leave me alone.
- Hey.
Copy !req
1194. Don't argue with me.
Copy !req
1195. A serious concussion.
Copy !req
1196. So, how do we make you pay?
Copy !req
1197. How about this? We...
Copy !req
1198. You're drinking
from the fountain.
Copy !req
1199. You never hear me come up
from behind you, and bam!
Copy !req
1200. - I shatter your front teeth
all over the spigot. -
Copy !req
1201. Hey, look at me.
Copy !req
1202. He's demented, like, medically.
Copy !req
1203. So watch out for yourself.
Copy !req
1204. - Close the door!
Copy !req
1205. - Mom got a monkey.
- Why'd you get a monkey?
Copy !req
1206. 'Cause I needed to laugh.
Copy !req
1207. - Oh, help me with this.
Copy !req
1208. The directions don't make
any sense.
Copy !req
1209. Careful. Careful.
Copy !req
1210. Get down!
Copy !req
1211. I'll get a banana.
Copy !req
1212. Save the curtains.
They're rented.
Copy !req
1213. Oh.
Copy !req
1214. Uh, hello.
Copy !req
1215. Who are you?
Copy !req
1216. He's mine.
Copy !req
1217. What are we gonna call him?
Copy !req
1218. Bennie. His name's Bennie.
Copy !req
1219. I don't want to see
a psychiatrist, Burt.
Copy !req
1220. You're scaring the kids.
Copy !req
1221. You're sleeping all day.
Copy !req
1222. I miss the desert.
Copy !req
1223. I miss dry heat.
Copy !req
1224. You haven't even unwrapped
the piano.
Copy !req
1225. You aren't cooking
or shopping or unpacking.
Copy !req
1226. Psychiatrists help you know
Copy !req
1227. why you're feeling something.
Copy !req
1228. They can't help you feel
something different.
Copy !req
1229. You're behaving
like when your mother died,
Copy !req
1230. like you're in mourning,
but nobody's died.
Copy !req
1231. Okay.
Copy !req
1232. So I'll call the monkey
some other name.
Copy !req
1233. IBM's out of his league, Mitz.
Copy !req
1234. Bennie was... He...
Copy !req
1235. is my best friend.
Copy !req
1236. But they don't need him.
Copy !req
1237. This is what I know.
Copy !req
1238. I don't need him, either.
Copy !req
1239. Bennie wasn't your friend.
Copy !req
1240. But you knew he was mine.
Copy !req
1241. What does that mean?
Copy !req
1242. Logan, I'm really,
really missing you.
Copy !req
1243. - Hey!
Copy !req
1244. - Who's there?
Copy !req
1245. Who's there?
Copy !req
1246. Bagelman, yo.
Copy !req
1247. I left you a little snack
in your locker.
Copy !req
1248. Did you like it?
Copy !req
1249. Guess he wasn't hungry.
Copy !req
1250. Uh, he said... he said it was...
Copy !req
1251. - What'd you call it, Chad?
- Kosher.
Copy !req
1252. - Kosher.
- Knock it off, moron!
Copy !req
1253. We talked about this.
Copy !req
1254. All right.
Copy !req
1255. Come on.
We'll be late for practice.
Copy !req
1256. So, what is this?
Are you Jewish?
Copy !req
1257. Well...
Copy !req
1258. Holy crap.
He's got the hots so bad,
Copy !req
1259. he can't even talk to her.
Copy !req
1260. No, I don't.
Copy !req
1261. Apologize to her.
Copy !req
1262. For what?
Copy !req
1263. For making goo-goo eyes at her,
for drooling at her.
Copy !req
1264. I wasn't drooling at her.
Copy !req
1265. Then apologize to her
for killing Christ.
Copy !req
1266. - Why are you encouraging him?
Copy !req
1267. Go on.
Copy !req
1268. Apologize to her
for killing our Lord.
Copy !req
1269. Ugh. Don't go.
Copy !req
1270. - Come watch me run.
- No, thanks.
Copy !req
1271. - I'm not in the mood now.
- Oh, please.
Copy !req
1272. I run better when you are there.
Copy !req
1273. Apologize to her, you
Christ-killing son of a bitch!
Copy !req
1274. I'm going home.
Copy !req
1275. Go on and say sorry.
Copy !req
1276. You're getting me in trouble
with my girl.
Copy !req
1277. You know, obviously,
since I'm not 2,000 years old
Copy !req
1278. and have never been to Rome,
I'm not apologizing.
Copy !req
1279. But hey, you know, maybe, uh,
your boyfriend should
Copy !req
1280. apologize to you
for making out in the stairwell
Copy !req
1281. half an hour ago
with some redhead.
Copy !req
1282. He-he's lying. He's...
I-I didn't do that.
Copy !req
1283. I swear.
Copy !req
1284. You told me
you were finished with her.
Copy !req
1285. Logan, you lied to me!
Copy !req
1286. Claudia.
Copy !req
1287. Whoa...
Copy !req
1288. You made a mistake.
Listen to me.
Copy !req
1289. - You made a mistake.
Copy !req
1290. - You're gonna fix it.
- Bash his head in!
Copy !req
1291. Shut up, Chad, goddamn it!
Copy !req
1292. Tomorrow, you're gonna
find her first thing,
Copy !req
1293. and you're gonna tell her
you were lying.
Copy !req
1294. Say-say you were, um, scared.
Copy !req
1295. Say-say whatever you
got to say, but you tell her
Copy !req
1296. it wasn't true and you did not
see me doing that.
Copy !req
1297. Or I swear, I will hurt you
Copy !req
1298. worse than
you've ever been hurt.
Copy !req
1299. You get me?
Copy !req
1300. Nod to show
you dig what I'm saying.
Copy !req
1301. He won't tell me who did this.
Copy !req
1302. - Ask him who did this.
Copy !req
1303. Tell your father who did this,
and he will drive
Copy !req
1304. to that little shit's house,
and he will beat
Copy !req
1305. - the living crap out of him.
- Is your nose broken?
Copy !req
1306. No, of course it's not broken.
You think I'd be sitting here
Copy !req
1307. - if his nose was broken?
- Who hit you?
Copy !req
1308. What do you care who it was?
Copy !req
1309. It's not like
you'll do anything about it.
Copy !req
1310. Tell me what happened first.
Copy !req
1311. What happened is I hate it here,
Copy !req
1312. and what happened is
you brought us here because...
Copy !req
1313. Because I got a better job,
so we moved.
Copy !req
1314. You don't even care
where you are.
Copy !req
1315. You get to go to work,
and that could be in Iceland.
Copy !req
1316. You're working
with your goddamn machines,
Copy !req
1317. so you get to be happy
while the rest of us are mis...
Copy !req
1318. - Just, come on.
- Don't.
Copy !req
1319. Well, but you-you're bleeding
on the carpet.
Copy !req
1320. It's a rental house.
Copy !req
1321. Do you even notice
how much we hate it here,
Copy !req
1322. where we're practically the
only Jewish people for miles
Copy !req
1323. and everything is awful?
Copy !req
1324. Do you even care
that this is your fault—
Copy !req
1325. everything
that's happening now—
Copy !req
1326. just because
you ran away from home
Copy !req
1327. and took all of us with you?
Copy !req
1328. I came here so I could work
ten times harder
Copy !req
1329. with ten times
the responsibility,
Copy !req
1330. which seems to have escaped
everybody,
Copy !req
1331. s-so I could build us
a nice home and...
Copy !req
1332. Could everyone settle?
I want to say something.
Copy !req
1333. No, no. You didn't come here
to build houses.
Copy !req
1334. You didn't come here to work.
You ran away.
Copy !req
1335. I think you have something
to say to me, Sammy!
Copy !req
1336. And if I'm right about that,
Copy !req
1337. then get it off your chest
and say it to my face!
Copy !req
1338. I started therapy.
Copy !req
1339. Anyways,
Copy !req
1340. what I really wanted
to say is that,
Copy !req
1341. about yesterday,
what I told you was...
Copy !req
1342. it wasn't true, and I lied,
Copy !req
1343. and I'm sorry.
Copy !req
1344. But why?
Copy !req
1345. - What did I ever do to you?
- Oh, no, no.
Copy !req
1346. - It wasn't about you.
- Because that, like, really,
Copy !req
1347. - really wasn't cool, you know?
- No, I didn't mean to hurt...
Copy !req
1348. - I didn't mean to hurt you.
- Because I really love Logan.
Copy !req
1349. Yeah, she cried herself to sleep
Copy !req
1350. thinking he cheated on her.
Copy !req
1351. You ought to be more considerate
Copy !req
1352. of other people's feelings.
Copy !req
1353. Okay, but Logan told me
to say I killed Christ.
Copy !req
1354. - That wasn't Logan.
- What?
Copy !req
1355. - That was Chad.
- Why would he do that?
Copy !req
1356. Logan laughed.
He thought it was hilarious.
Copy !req
1357. He's Jewish.
Copy !req
1358. You don't say.
Copy !req
1359. Yeah, I mean, since the day
I was circumcised.
Copy !req
1360. So, how'd you know
she was a redhead?
Copy !req
1361. - Oh, my God.
- Hmm?
Copy !req
1362. He was making out
with Renee Reynolds?
Copy !req
1363. - If you were lying...
- Mm-hmm?
Copy !req
1364. how'd you know
her hair color?
Copy !req
1365. Uh...
Copy !req
1366. Does it hurt?
Copy !req
1367. So, you don't believe in Jesus?
Copy !req
1368. Monica's, like,
totally hot on Jesus.
Copy !req
1369. I can't imagine my life
without him.
Copy !req
1370. Well, we've managed
for like 5,000 years,
Copy !req
1371. so I guess it's possible.
Copy !req
1372. Maybe we could...
Copy !req
1373. I don't know, get together
and pray on it.
Copy !req
1374. - What, like, you and me?
Copy !req
1375. We can ask him
to come into your heart
Copy !req
1376. and, you know, see what happens.
Copy !req
1377. Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Sure.
Copy !req
1378. - I mean...
Copy !req
1379. What? Like, that would be,
like, when? Like, today?
Copy !req
1380. It's a lot, huh?
Copy !req
1381. It's sort of a shrine almost.
Copy !req
1382. A shrine to guys.
Copy !req
1383. L-Lots of guys.
Copy !req
1384. They're sexy.
Copy !req
1385. I guess.
Copy !req
1386. I mean, not Jesus.
Copy !req
1387. Jesus is sexy.
Copy !req
1388. Isn't that, like,
a sin or something?
Copy !req
1389. I don't know.
Copy !req
1390. He came to us as a man.
Copy !req
1391. A handsome young man.
Copy !req
1392. He could've come as a girl
or an old man
Copy !req
1393. or someone with leprosy, but...
Copy !req
1394. Nobody knows
what he really looked like.
Copy !req
1395. Probably, he looked like you.
Copy !req
1396. Oh, because... because he was...
Copy !req
1397. Jewish.
Copy !req
1398. A handsome Jewish boy.
Copy !req
1399. Just like you.
Copy !req
1400. Let's pray.
Copy !req
1401. Close your eyes.
Copy !req
1402. Lord, I'm here
with my friend Sammy...
Copy !req
1403. Sam.
Copy !req
1404. I'm here with
my good friend Sam,
Copy !req
1405. who's Jewish,
and he's a nice boy.
Copy !req
1406. Lord Jesus, he's good and brave,
Copy !req
1407. and he's funny, Lord, and...
Copy !req
1408. and I like him.
Copy !req
1409. Relax.
Copy !req
1410. Ask.
Copy !req
1411. Ask him to come into you.
Copy !req
1412. Ask him to enter you.
Copy !req
1413. Um...
Copy !req
1414. hi there, Jesus.
Copy !req
1415. It's me, Sam Fabelman.
Copy !req
1416. If you're real, show me
Copy !req
1417. - a sign or something, and...
- No, wait. You can't...
Copy !req
1418. You can't ask Jesus
to do tricks to impress you.
Copy !req
1419. You have to be humble.
Copy !req
1420. You have to beg him to.
I'll do it.
Copy !req
1421. I'm gonna beg the Holy Spirit
to come into me.
Copy !req
1422. I'm gonna draw the Spirit
in with my breath.
Copy !req
1423. Spirit, come into me!
Copy !req
1424. Please, Holy Spirit!
Copy !req
1425. I'm begging you,
sweet Holy Father,
Copy !req
1426. for the sake of my friend Sammy.
Copy !req
1427. Sam.
Copy !req
1428. Come into us, Jesus!
Copy !req
1429. Hear our prayer!
Copy !req
1430. Open your mouth.
Copy !req
1431. Open your mouth and take
the spirit of Christ into you.
Copy !req
1432. Monica, Sammy, I made snacks.
Copy !req
1433. - We're coming!
Copy !req
1434. - Oh...
- Tomorrow after school,
Copy !req
1435. want to meet out back
behind the bleachers?
Copy !req
1436. - Yeah.
- Cool.
Copy !req
1437. We can pray some more.
Copy !req
1438. When I was a girl
and I felt sad,
Copy !req
1439. I'd go to the zoo
and I'd watch the monkeys.
Copy !req
1440. They made you laugh?
Copy !req
1441. Yeah, yeah, the monkeyshines.
Copy !req
1442. Oh, but there was
more to it than that.
Copy !req
1443. It was...
Copy !req
1444. They understand
what we've done to them,
Copy !req
1445. with the cages
and the people pointing.
Copy !req
1446. We share that with them,
Copy !req
1447. the truth of
how cruel people are.
Copy !req
1448. But if you watch them
for long enough,
Copy !req
1449. you can tell they know stuff
we can't begin to imagine.
Copy !req
1450. Important stuff.
Copy !req
1451. And they're not gonna
let us in on it
Copy !req
1452. 'cause it belongs to them.
Copy !req
1453. It's their own monkey business.
Copy !req
1454. Theirs. It's not ours. It's...
Copy !req
1455. Oh, I don't know.
Copy !req
1456. Self-possession.
Copy !req
1457. Right.
Copy !req
1458. They belong to themselves.
Copy !req
1459. If it belongs to itself,
Copy !req
1460. let it go back
to where it came from.
Copy !req
1461. Anyway, that's how come
I got a monkey.
Copy !req
1462. And a therapist.
Copy !req
1463. He throws his poop.
Copy !req
1464. The therapist?
Copy !req
1465. No, the monkey.
Copy !req
1466. That's why I'm staying
in a hotel.
Copy !req
1467. You don't have to.
We have plenty of room.
Copy !req
1468. My rabbi in New Jersey says
Copy !req
1469. a monkey in the house
isn't kosher.
Copy !req
1470. That's why we're not
going to eat him.
Copy !req
1471. Did you schedule him
for his polio vaccine?
Copy !req
1472. - They can get polio?
- Pass the peas.
Copy !req
1473. Well, they're susceptible
to pretty much everything
Copy !req
1474. - humans are, so yes.
- He hates going to the vet.
Copy !req
1475. You see, Monica, in this family,
Copy !req
1476. it's the scientists
versus the artists.
Copy !req
1477. Sammy's on my team.
Copy !req
1478. Takes after me,
except he's got real talent.
Copy !req
1479. Mom.
Copy !req
1480. And he's completely terrible
at science.
Copy !req
1481. Mm. And algebra.
Copy !req
1482. And sports.
Copy !req
1483. - Will you please stop?
- He showed me his camera.
Copy !req
1484. - Is he good at kissing?
Copy !req
1485. - I'll tell you later.
- Shut up!
Copy !req
1486. - He sleeps with a camera
under his pillow. -No, I don't.
Copy !req
1487. But he refuses
to actually shoot anything.
Copy !req
1488. He should shoot Ditch Day.
Copy !req
1489. - Mm. Mm-mm. -They still
don't have a photographer.
Copy !req
1490. - You could volunteer.
- What's Ditch Day?
Copy !req
1491. It doesn't matter.
I'm not going.
Copy !req
1492. Something seniors get to do
at the end of the year.
Copy !req
1493. They let us pretend like
we're ditching school,
Copy !req
1494. and we all take buses
to Santa Cruz Main Beach.
Copy !req
1495. You have to go! Everyone goes.
Copy !req
1496. My dad will lend you his camera.
Copy !req
1497. It's super fancy.
Copy !req
1498. Costs like a thousand dollars.
Copy !req
1499. It's called, like, a...
an "Air" something. I forget.
Copy !req
1500. - Wait, not an Arriflex.
- Right.
Copy !req
1501. Your dad owns
a 16 millimeter Arriflex?
Copy !req
1502. Wow. Wow, okay.
So, 16 millimeter on stock...
Copy !req
1503. See, usually it's the teacher
who shoots the Ditch Day movie,
Copy !req
1504. - and it's a big joke. -That's
two minutes, 45 seconds a roll.
Copy !req
1505. At ten bucks a roll,
for a whole day, that would be,
Copy !req
1506. - like, insanely expensive.
- I owe you a graduation check.
Copy !req
1507. My dad will get the school
to pay for it.
Copy !req
1508. And I need to rent a
16 millimeter editing machine,
Copy !req
1509. and I have no idea
how much that costs,
Copy !req
1510. - so it's not gonna work.
- My dad will rent one for you.
Copy !req
1511. Uh, we can rent it,
whatever it costs, right?
Copy !req
1512. Burt.
Copy !req
1513. Uh, what's wrong
with your Bolex?
Copy !req
1514. You could afford to be
a little encouraging.
Copy !req
1515. About what?
Copy !req
1516. About him making movies again.
Copy !req
1517. Well, I didn't say that.
I'm just talking...
Copy !req
1518. - Maybe he's moved on.
- On from what?
Copy !req
1519. He hasn't picked up his camera
once since we got here.
Copy !req
1520. He'll be going to college
this September.
Copy !req
1521. Maybe his feelings about it
have changed.
Copy !req
1522. He's growing up.
I'm enthusiastic about that.
Copy !req
1523. Filming is what he loves.
Copy !req
1524. - I don't think him...
- Oh, Jesus Christ. I'm sorry.
Copy !req
1525. Guys, can we please just
stop talking about me?
Copy !req
1526. I'd think that you,
more than anyone,
Copy !req
1527. should have some
understanding of what a...
Copy !req
1528. Let's go to your place
or something.
Copy !req
1529. Maybe your dad
can show me the camera.
Copy !req
1530. - ... a vocation, a-a calling is.
- All right. All right.
Copy !req
1531. We'll rent him the equipment.
Copy !req
1532. He hates the beach.
Copy !req
1533. That's why he doesn't want
to go to Ditch Day.
Copy !req
1534. But it's not your calling.
Copy !req
1535. Is that why you can't, uh,
respect it?
Copy !req
1536. I have respect for everything
Copy !req
1537. - he works hard doing.
- He's afraid.
Copy !req
1538. He's scared if he does, those
guys will beat him up again.
Copy !req
1539. What? No, I'm not. I never said
that I was scared of them.
Copy !req
1540. - You don't, though.
- You got beat up?
Copy !req
1541. You always dismiss
what he does, what anyone does,
Copy !req
1542. that's playful or imaginative
as a pastime or a hobby.
Copy !req
1543. You already won, Mitz.
Copy !req
1544. I surrendered.
I'm not taking the bait.
Copy !req
1545. Can you guys please
just cut it out?
Copy !req
1546. - Oh, who's baiting who?
- You're embarrassing me.
Copy !req
1547. I said I'd take him for his
polio shot the first five times
Copy !req
1548. - you asked me, didn't I?
- Well, you say you will,
Copy !req
1549. but I guess you don't mean it,
so I ask again
Copy !req
1550. - and again and again.
- He's scared of shots.
Copy !req
1551. - He's scared of the doctor.
Copy !req
1552. I am taking the goddamn monkey
to the vet, okay?
Copy !req
1553. Probably needs a tranquilizer
Copy !req
1554. with all this yelling.
Copy !req
1555. Can you ask your dad
about borrowing the camera?
Copy !req
1556. He'll say yes.
Copy !req
1557. Thank you.
Copy !req
1558. I'm filming Ditch Day.
Copy !req
1559. I think it's a great idea.
Copy !req
1560. - Nice!
Copy !req
1561. - Go, go, go, go, go!
Copy !req
1562. - Don't be scared.
Copy !req
1563. Your mom misses Phoenix
too much.
Copy !req
1564. Tell them the truth.
Copy !req
1565. And I can't leave.
Copy !req
1566. This is where my work is.
Copy !req
1567. I have to...
Copy !req
1568. That's crazy.
Copy !req
1569. You... you can't ruin everything
Copy !req
1570. because you miss one place
Copy !req
1571. and you're stuck someplace else.
Copy !req
1572. I miss Bennie too much.
Copy !req
1573. So?
Copy !req
1574. We all miss him.
Copy !req
1575. This is a different kind
of missing.
Copy !req
1576. Because what?
Copy !req
1577. You love Bennie?
Copy !req
1578. - Don't you love Daddy?
Copy !req
1579. Sure she does.
Copy !req
1580. - Of course I love Dad.
- And I love Mom.
Copy !req
1581. Then why is this
all of a sudden happening?
Copy !req
1582. Stay together.
Copy !req
1583. You love each other,
and you love us,
Copy !req
1584. and we don't want this.
Copy !req
1585. We don't want to have to move
back and forth
Copy !req
1586. and not live with both of you.
Copy !req
1587. We can't. Dad, we can't.
Copy !req
1588. You're always so mean to him!
Copy !req
1589. That's why
you're getting divorced!
Copy !req
1590. It's because of you!
Copy !req
1591. Don't blame your mom.
Copy !req
1592. This wasn't her idea.
It was mine.
Copy !req
1593. - Don't-don't say that.
- No, it wasn't.
Copy !req
1594. She just said it was because
of Bennie, so stop lying!
Copy !req
1595. Both of you, stop lying!
Copy !req
1596. I'm giving your mom a chance
Copy !req
1597. to go back to, uh,
Phoenix to live...
Copy !req
1598. I don't understand
how you can go back
Copy !req
1599. to your beach blanket movie
after that.
Copy !req
1600. We're different, I guess.
Copy !req
1601. Is she gonna marry Bennie?
Copy !req
1602. If she wants to, she will.
Copy !req
1603. God, she's the most selfish
person in the world.
Copy !req
1604. It must've been hard for her,
married to a...
Copy !req
1605. a genius.
Copy !req
1606. Dad worships Mom.
Copy !req
1607. Okay.
Copy !req
1608. But maybe it's hard
being worshipped by someone
Copy !req
1609. you know you'll never
be as good as
Copy !req
1610. or ever do anything as good as.
Copy !req
1611. She...
Copy !req
1612. She laughs at Bennie's jokes...
Copy !req
1613. but Dad's always
been her best audience.
Copy !req
1614. Come on.
Copy !req
1615. She'll be fine.
Copy !req
1616. She'll tell herself everything
happens for a reason.
Copy !req
1617. She'll make excuses
like she always does.
Copy !req
1618. You're way more selfish
than her.
Copy !req
1619. That's why you're angry at her.
Copy !req
1620. It's because she's scared,
Copy !req
1621. just like you, Sammy.
Copy !req
1622. Out of everyone
in this out-of-control,
Copy !req
1623. falling-apart family,
Copy !req
1624. the one who's most like Mitzi
is you.
Copy !req
1625. Wait.
Copy !req
1626. Look, before I show this
to the whole school,
Copy !req
1627. could you please
watch it with me?
Copy !req
1628. - Hold your breath!
Copy !req
1629. Here.
Copy !req
1630. Oh, wow.
Copy !req
1631. Did you find Jesus?
Copy !req
1632. In a jewelry store.
Copy !req
1633. Hey, man, look who's here.
Copy !req
1634. Hey!
Let's get this party started!
Copy !req
1635. - Let the festivities begin.
Copy !req
1636. So, in September,
when I move to L.A.,
Copy !req
1637. I'm gonna try and get work
in a movie studio.
Copy !req
1638. Thought you were going
to college.
Copy !req
1639. Could you...
Copy !req
1640. Would you ever consider
coming with me?
Copy !req
1641. I'm going to Texas A&M.
Copy !req
1642. You know that.
Copy !req
1643. Yes, I do.
Copy !req
1644. But I thought...
Copy !req
1645. maybe you should
change your mind, because...
Copy !req
1646. Because what?
Copy !req
1647. - Because I love you.
- Ow!
Copy !req
1648. - Sammy!
- Oh, sorry!
Copy !req
1649. Sorry, sorry, sorry.
Copy !req
1650. That's not possible.
Copy !req
1651. - What?
Copy !req
1652. N-No, it is.
Copy !req
1653. - Monica, I love you.
Copy !req
1654. That's impossible. Sammy...
Copy !req
1655. Sam.
Copy !req
1656. We only started dating like...
Copy !req
1657. Everything was so normal before.
Copy !req
1658. Why are you acting so...
Copy !req
1659. No, because
nothing's normal now.
Copy !req
1660. They're getting a divorce.
Copy !req
1661. What are you talking about?
Copy !req
1662. My mom and dad,
they're splitting up.
Copy !req
1663. Jesus Christ! This is prom!
Copy !req
1664. You can't just blurt something
out like that at prom!
Copy !req
1665. Wait.
Copy !req
1666. Monica!
Copy !req
1667. Look, that's-that's got
nothing to do with us, okay?
Copy !req
1668. - I'm not... -That's not why
I said that I love you.
Copy !req
1669. - I don't know why I...
- I'm not gonna change
Copy !req
1670. my whole life
and move to Hollywood
Copy !req
1671. because your parents are having
marital difficulties.
Copy !req
1672. You can get a refund.
I hardly wore it at all.
Copy !req
1673. Are you breaking up with me?
Copy !req
1674. Not at prom,
but of course, eventually.
Copy !req
1675. I'm gonna pray on it.
Copy !req
1676. And I'm gonna pray
really, really hard for you
Copy !req
1677. because you're such a fun boy
to kiss, but...
Copy !req
1678. Thank you. Thank you.
Copy !req
1679. Wonderful. Wonderful.
Copy !req
1680. Let's thank our band
for that great music.
Copy !req
1681. Sometimes we just can't
fix things, Sam...
Copy !req
1682. and all we can do is suffer.
Copy !req
1683. Now we're gonna take
a little break from the dancing
Copy !req
1684. for a very special moment
for the class of 1964.
Copy !req
1685. Um, Mr. Samuel Fabelman,
where are you?
Copy !req
1686. Where is he?
Copy !req
1687. Okay.
Copy !req
1688. Bagelman!
Copy !req
1689. Bagelman!
Copy !req
1690. - Okay, everybody.
Copy !req
1691. - Face this way. Grab a chair.
Copy !req
1692. Let's all get close
to the screen.
Copy !req
1693. Right up front. Very good.
Copy !req
1694. Mr. Fabelman,
this is your big moment.
Copy !req
1695. We're ready to watch
your Technicolor masterpiece,
Copy !req
1696. "Ditch Day 1964."
Copy !req
1697. And as they say way down south
in Hollywoodland, "lights..."
Copy !req
1698. Uh, "lights, camera, action!"
Copy !req
1699. - Oh, no!
Copy !req
1700. - Aw.
Copy !req
1701. Whoo! Let's go! Come on!
Copy !req
1702. No, no, no, no, no.
Copy !req
1703. Logan, you were so incredible
up there.
Copy !req
1704. It was amazing.
Copy !req
1705. Why'd you do that?
Copy !req
1706. What?
Copy !req
1707. Why'd you make me
look like that?
Copy !req
1708. - In the film?
- Yes, in the film!
Copy !req
1709. Oh, shit! Shit.
Copy !req
1710. What's the matter with you?
Copy !req
1711. I've been a...
a total asshole to you.
Copy !req
1712. - I broke your nose, and then...
- You didn't break my nose.
Copy !req
1713. - Then you go and make me look
like-like that. -You almost—
Copy !req
1714. - You didn't break it.
- What's wrong with you?
Copy !req
1715. Logan, all I did was hold the
camera, and it saw what it saw.
Copy !req
1716. Oh, bullshit! Fabelman,
you made me look like...
Copy !req
1717. like this golden kind of thing.
Copy !req
1718. - Yeah? -And Claudia,
she just kissed me.
Copy !req
1719. - Mazel tov.
- In front of the whole school.
Copy !req
1720. - Okay, great. -I treat her
shittier than I treat you,
Copy !req
1721. - and now she wants to...
- You're welcome, man. Jesus...
Copy !req
1722. No, no. Don't...
Don't go. Don't go.
Copy !req
1723. I want to know why you did that.
Copy !req
1724. I don't know. I ought to have
my head examined.
Copy !req
1725. Am I supposed to feel bad now
Copy !req
1726. about all that shit
we did to you?
Copy !req
1727. Do you feel bad
about all that shit?
Copy !req
1728. That's none of
your goddamn business!
Copy !req
1729. - 'Cause you should feel bad
about... -Oh, right!
Copy !req
1730. That's why you did it. You want
me to feel like crap about...
Copy !req
1731. I wanted you to be nice to me
for five minutes!
Copy !req
1732. Or I did it
to make my movie better.
Copy !req
1733. I don't know why.
Copy !req
1734. You are the biggest jerk
I've ever met in my entire life.
Copy !req
1735. I have a monkey at home
that's smarter than you!
Copy !req
1736. You dumb, anti-Semitic asshole!
Copy !req
1737. I made you look like
you could fly.
Copy !req
1738. But I can't fly.
Copy !req
1739. I can outrun any guy
in Santa Clara County,
Copy !req
1740. and I worked real hard
to do that.
Copy !req
1741. But you... you make me feel
like I'm some kind of failure
Copy !req
1742. or a phony or...
or like I'm supposed to be
Copy !req
1743. some guy I'm never gonna be,
not even in my dreams.
Copy !req
1744. You took that guy,
whoever he is,
Copy !req
1745. wherever you got him from,
and you put him up there
Copy !req
1746. on that screen
and told everyone...
Copy !req
1747. everyone that that's me.
Copy !req
1748. And that's not me.
That's... It's...
Copy !req
1749. Goddamn it. Goddamn it.
Copy !req
1750. Jesus, it wasn't supposed
to make you upset.
Copy !req
1751. I didn't mean to freak you out.
I didn't mean...
Copy !req
1752. Who cares what you meant?
Copy !req
1753. Fabelman!
Copy !req
1754. Oh, shit.
Copy !req
1755. You liar! You backstabbing liar!
Copy !req
1756. I'm gonna beat your...
Copy !req
1757. You totally bought it,
his whole snow job.
Copy !req
1758. You ate it up. You moron.
Copy !req
1759. Logan, you are so conceited
and dumb.
Copy !req
1760. Is something about to happen?
Copy !req
1761. You like living dangerously,
Fabelman.
Copy !req
1762. No, I don't.
I really, really don't.
Copy !req
1763. Yes, you do.
Copy !req
1764. But you tell anybody
about me getting, um...
Copy !req
1765. upset, that would be a mistake.
Copy !req
1766. Our secret.
Copy !req
1767. Okay?
Copy !req
1768. Definitely.
Copy !req
1769. Unless I make a movie about it.
Copy !req
1770. Which I'm never ever gonna do.
Copy !req
1771. You never...
Copy !req
1772. What's it like?
Copy !req
1773. It kind of shows you how
out of control everything is
Copy !req
1774. and how y-you're not
in charge of anything.
Copy !req
1775. A-And how it doesn't matter.
Copy !req
1776. I better not.
Copy !req
1777. In my head, everything's
already out of control.
Copy !req
1778. - You're full of shit.
Copy !req
1779. I got to split.
Claudia's waiting for me.
Copy !req
1780. Life's nothing like the movies,
Fabelman.
Copy !req
1781. Maybe not.
Copy !req
1782. But hey, in the end...
Copy !req
1783. you got the girl.
Copy !req
1784. Must have been some night.
Copy !req
1785. Did Monica like the corsage?
Copy !req
1786. - Yeah.
- Well, I told you she would.
Copy !req
1787. That time when I hit you...
Copy !req
1788. In-in Phoenix, when I...
Copy !req
1789. Oh, God. You remember.
Copy !req
1790. Not really.
Copy !req
1791. Oh, for the love of God,
it's not like
Copy !req
1792. I spent my whole life
hitting you.
Copy !req
1793. Once. I hit you once.
Copy !req
1794. It should've been memorable.
Copy !req
1795. Before the swimming test.
Copy !req
1796. Yes, before the swimming test!
Copy !req
1797. Yes. Well, I-I...
Copy !req
1798. I s-slapped you on your back...
Copy !req
1799. as hard as I could.
I screwed up your tryouts,
Copy !req
1800. and you-you couldn't get
your merit badge,
Copy !req
1801. and then you couldn't make
Eagle Scout.
Copy !req
1802. - Ma, I made Eagle Scout.
- And I...
Copy !req
1803. - It wasn't a big deal.
- Well, I left a goddamn mark
Copy !req
1804. on your skin
in the sh-shape of my hand.
Copy !req
1805. And I need you to say
you forgive me for doing that.
Copy !req
1806. - Well, okay. I forgive you.
- Because... Because...
Copy !req
1807. - Because you're my kid.
- Mom, I forgive you.
Copy !req
1808. And-and-and my kids
mean more to me than...
Copy !req
1809. - Mom, I forgive you.
- ... anything else on the Earth.
Copy !req
1810. - I forgive you.
- Because...
Copy !req
1811. Please, please. Because how
am I ever gonna forgive myself?
Copy !req
1812. - I can't.
- Mom, I-I-I...
Copy !req
1813. I forgive you.
Copy !req
1814. The eggs are burning.
Copy !req
1815. Oh, God.
Copy !req
1816. I'm doing this thing.
Copy !req
1817. And I-I don't know
if it's the right thing,
Copy !req
1818. but it's a life-and-death
thing for me.
Copy !req
1819. And I'm sorry,
but everybody else
Copy !req
1820. is gonna have to hang on
for dear life.
Copy !req
1821. And somehow,
Copy !req
1822. we will survive this, all of us.
Copy !req
1823. Even your father,
who I adore with all my heart.
Copy !req
1824. He deserves so much better
than what I'm doing, but...
Copy !req
1825. but Bennie needs me, dolly.
Copy !req
1826. And I need him.
Copy !req
1827. So much so that without him,
Copy !req
1828. I'm turning into someone
I don't know
Copy !req
1829. and none of you
will know me anymore.
Copy !req
1830. I'll just be that hateful person
Copy !req
1831. who did that terrible thing
to your back.
Copy !req
1832. And yes, this is the most
selfish thing I have ever done,
Copy !req
1833. but I've got to do this now
because, Sammy...
Copy !req
1834. you do what your heart
says you have to,
Copy !req
1835. 'cause you don't owe anyone
your life.
Copy !req
1836. Not even me.
Copy !req
1837. Oh... Are they ruined?
Copy !req
1838. I-I-I can make some more.
Copy !req
1839. Oh, no, no, no.
Copy !req
1840. I like 'em burnt.
Copy !req
1841. So, Monica dumped me.
Copy !req
1842. She did?
Copy !req
1843. Yeah, after I told her
about the divorce.
Copy !req
1844. Huh?
Copy !req
1845. Probably shouldn't have
asked her to marry me.
Copy !req
1846. - You did not.
- Oh, but...
Copy !req
1847. - Oh. You did?
Copy !req
1848. - In so many words.
- Poor girl.
Copy !req
1849. Dad?
Copy !req
1850. Hey, Dad, I'm home.
Copy !req
1851. Sammy?
Copy !req
1852. I think I'm having
a heart attack.
Copy !req
1853. - Come here.
Copy !req
1854. It's a panic attack.
Your mother gets them.
Copy !req
1855. - What did you do when she'd
get them? -I made her tea.
Copy !req
1856. Okay.
Copy !req
1857. Plus, you're exhausted.
Copy !req
1858. You don't sleep.
Copy !req
1859. I hear you walking around
all night
Copy !req
1860. or typing those letters,
Copy !req
1861. and the three hours' drive
to the college
Copy !req
1862. - every day and back, it's...
- Oh, no, no, no.
Copy !req
1863. I can't go back to that dorm.
Copy !req
1864. Maybe your roommate
settled down.
Copy !req
1865. He voted for Goldwater.
Copy !req
1866. I can't go back.
Copy !req
1867. Dad...
Copy !req
1868. I don't know...
Copy !req
1869. what to do anymore.
Copy !req
1870. I don't want to disappoint you,
Copy !req
1871. and I promised
that I'd stick it out,
Copy !req
1872. but two years is like forever,
and I hate school.
Copy !req
1873. - Like, a lot.
Copy !req
1874. And I want to get work
on a movie or a TV show,
Copy !req
1875. so I send out all those letters,
Copy !req
1876. but nobody ever writes back.
Copy !req
1877. And my life is just
going by so fast,
Copy !req
1878. but it's not getting anywhere.
Copy !req
1879. Concentrate on sipping.
It'll calm you down.
Copy !req
1880. Here. Uh...
Copy !req
1881. You can go through the mail
while I get the soup hot.
Copy !req
1882. It's from Mom.
Copy !req
1883. It's just a bunch
of goofy photos
Copy !req
1884. from some kind of block party.
Copy !req
1885. Dad?
Copy !req
1886. Dad, what's...
Copy !req
1887. Oh, Dad, I didn't mean to...
Copy !req
1888. If you hate school so much,
don't go.
Copy !req
1889. But... Dad, we need...
Copy !req
1890. I don't know.
I would like you to
Copy !req
1891. because this film thing...
I don't know.
Copy !req
1892. Maybe I should have
put my foot down about it
Copy !req
1893. years ago, but...
Copy !req
1894. I know you're gonna work
like the dickens
Copy !req
1895. on whatever you wind up doing
Copy !req
1896. because you're a chip
off the old block.
Copy !req
1897. We're never not going to know
each other, Sammy.
Copy !req
1898. How do you know that?
Copy !req
1899. You and Mom don't anymore.
Copy !req
1900. Yes, we do.
Copy !req
1901. We always will.
Copy !req
1902. I know it because...
Copy !req
1903. we've gone too far
in our story
Copy !req
1904. to actually say "the end."
Copy !req
1905. Uh, you missed something
in the mail.
Copy !req
1906. Good news?
Copy !req
1907. They've ordered 32 half hours,
Copy !req
1908. Fridays at 8:30 p.m. on CBS,
starting September 17th.
Copy !req
1909. We already have six shows
in the can.
Copy !req
1910. It's like Stalag 17
or The Great Escape,
Copy !req
1911. - except it's funnier.
- Mm.
Copy !req
1912. And it's for television.
Copy !req
1913. - And it's funny.
- Yeah.
Copy !req
1914. Or at least I pray to God
that it's funny.
Copy !req
1915. Hogan's Heroes—
that's the title.
Copy !req
1916. What do you think?
Copy !req
1917. - Pretty catchy, right?
- Catchy. Yeah.
Copy !req
1918. And if all goes well,
Copy !req
1919. I might be able to offer you
something next season.
Copy !req
1920. Maybe assisting an assistant
to an assistant.
Copy !req
1921. You don't want to be
in TV anyway.
Copy !req
1922. Um, your letter said as much.
Copy !req
1923. By the way, I love this letter.
Copy !req
1924. - Oh.
- I used to write a whole bunch
Copy !req
1925. of these letters
when I was your age.
Copy !req
1926. You want to make movies.
Am I right?
Copy !req
1927. Well, yeah. Yes, I do.
Copy !req
1928. But look, I'm just happy
to start anywhere,
Copy !req
1929. - and-and that doesn't...
Copy !req
1930. You know who you need to meet?
Copy !req
1931. I mean, not for a job,
'cause he doesn't do that.
Copy !req
1932. How would you like to meet
Copy !req
1933. the greatest film director
who ever lived?
Copy !req
1934. And he's right across the hall.
Copy !req
1935. Come on.
Copy !req
1936. Wait here a minute.
Copy !req
1937. Um, this is Nona.
Copy !req
1938. Nona's gonna look after you.
Copy !req
1939. Um, he's not here. He's...
Copy !req
1940. - He's at lunch.
- Right.
Copy !req
1941. - You want to wait?
- Yeah, he'll wait.
Copy !req
1942. Sit.
Copy !req
1943. Good luck.
Copy !req
1944. Could be hours.
Copy !req
1945. All right, kid,
you got five minutes.
Copy !req
1946. Probably one. Stand up.
Copy !req
1947. Hey. L-Lose the tie.
Copy !req
1948. You'll stand a better chance.
Copy !req
1949. They tell me you want to be
a picture maker.
Copy !req
1950. Um, yes, sir, I do.
Copy !req
1951. Why?
Copy !req
1952. This business,
it'll rip you apart.
Copy !req
1953. W-Well...
Copy !req
1954. Mr. Ford, I...
Copy !req
1955. So, what do you know
about art, kid?
Copy !req
1956. I-I love your movies so much.
Copy !req
1957. No. Art.
Copy !req
1958. See that painting over there?
Copy !req
1959. Uh, yeah. I mean yes.
Copy !req
1960. Yes, I do see it.
Copy !req
1961. Walk over to it.
Copy !req
1962. Well, what's in it? Describe it.
Copy !req
1963. Oh, okay. Um...
Copy !req
1964. So, there are two guys,
Copy !req
1965. and they're on horseback,
Copy !req
1966. and they're looking
for something.
Copy !req
1967. So maybe they're scouting...
Copy !req
1968. No. No.
Copy !req
1969. Where's the horizon?
Copy !req
1970. The-the horizon?
Copy !req
1971. - Where is it?
- Yeah, it's at the bottom.
Copy !req
1972. That's right.
Copy !req
1973. Walk over to this painting.
Copy !req
1974. Well?
Copy !req
1975. Right, okay.
So, there are five cowboys.
Copy !req
1976. - You know, they could be
Indian... -No, no, no, no, no!
Copy !req
1977. Where's the goddamn horizon?
Copy !req
1978. Um, it's-it's there.
Copy !req
1979. - Where?
- At the top of the painting.
Copy !req
1980. All right, get over here.
Copy !req
1981. Now, remember this.
Copy !req
1982. When the horizon's
at the bottom,
Copy !req
1983. it's interesting.
Copy !req
1984. When the horizon's at the top,
Copy !req
1985. it's interesting.
Copy !req
1986. When the horizon's
in the middle,
Copy !req
1987. it's boring as shit.
Copy !req
1988. Now, good luck to you.
Copy !req
1989. And get the fuck out
of my office!
Copy !req
1990. Okay.
Copy !req
1991. Thank you.
Copy !req
1992. My pleasure.
Copy !req