1. How can I help you?
Copy !req
2. Uh,
can I get a black coffee?
Copy !req
3. Sure.
Copy !req
4. Thank you.
Copy !req
5. I love that book so much.
It's, uh...
Copy !req
6. I just finished it last week.
Copy !req
7. It's incredible.
It's...
Copy !req
8. I really, really,
really admire it.
Copy !req
9. And, uh...
Copy !req
10. Uh...
Copy !req
11. All right.
Copy !req
12. Um, I'm sorry. I didn't mean...
Copy !req
13. I wasn't... Genuinely,
Copy !req
14. - I really admire the book.
- What? Sorry?
Copy !req
15. I was just saying, I'm not...
Copy !req
16. I'm not hitting on you. I...
Copy !req
17. Sorry, what do you mean?
Copy !req
18. Genuinely,
I just really admire the book.
Copy !req
19. I'm deaf in this one.
Copy !req
20. You're deaf?
Copy !req
21. Yeah. This one though. I can...
Copy !req
22. Uh...
Copy !req
23. Yeah, the, uh...
Copy !req
24. Do you want to start over?
Copy !req
25. - Um...
- We could just try it again?
Copy !req
26. - Maybe?
- You wanna try...
Copy !req
27. - Just do it again?
- Yeah. Do it again.
Copy !req
28. - Okay.
- Okay.
Copy !req
29. "I was absolutely certain
Copy !req
30. "I was being trapped
Copy !req
31. "and that you were recording me
Copy !req
32. "and I was gonna be
all over the Internet,
Copy !req
33. "but I now understand..."
Copy !req
34. "... that the only thing
that could have saved me
Copy !req
35. "was a second first impression."
Copy !req
36. Yeah. So funny. Great.
Copy !req
37. So I'm gonna start there
and then go on
Copy !req
38. - to the first date.
- Good.
Copy !req
39. So what'd you think
of the ending?
Copy !req
40. Ending? Of what?
Copy !req
41. Of the book.
I just finished it.
Copy !req
42. Oh, the, um...
Copy !req
43. I don't know. I feel like
I didn't get it, you know.
Copy !req
44. Like I was missing something.
Copy !req
45. Yeah, no, I know what you mean.
I think...
Copy !req
46. Yeah, me neither, really.
Copy !req
47. 'Cause did she die?
Is that...
Copy !req
48. Like, do you think
that's what it was?
Copy !req
49. I think so. I think so.
Copy !req
50. Just, that doesn't make
any sense.
Copy !req
51. It doesn't?
Copy !req
52. Well, no, 'cause you remember
this, like, the mirror thing?
Copy !req
53. Hm.
Wait, which mirror?
Copy !req
54. The whole thing at the end
with the mirror.
Copy !req
55. Um...
Copy !req
56. I thought it was just more of
a kind of metaphor for like...
Copy !req
57. Uh...
Copy !req
58. I just didn't really realize
it was real in the sense
Copy !req
59. that the mirror was, um...
Copy !req
60. The mirror was...
Copy !req
61. I don't even know...
Copy !req
62. I don't even know
where to take this.
Copy !req
63. I didn't read the book.
And, um... yeah.
Copy !req
64. - What?
- I think I just glitched
Copy !req
65. when I saw you...
Copy !req
66. and I just wanted
to talk to you.
Copy !req
67. And I didn't have anything,
so...
Copy !req
68. That's weird.
Copy !req
69. Um, yeah, I'm...
Well, I'm sorry. I didn't...
Copy !req
70. Just a weird, little freak.
Copy !req
71. Weird, little British freak.
Copy !req
72. Oh, yeah?
Copy !req
73. I'm sorry. I didn't realize
you actually doubled down.
Copy !req
74. Yeah, what was I supposed to do?
Copy !req
75. How about reading the book?
Copy !req
76. For a first date? I don't know.
That's a lot weirder, no?
Copy !req
77. How is that weirder?
Copy !req
78. I don't know.
It just feels weirder somehow.
Copy !req
79. Okay. Don't agree, but go on.
Copy !req
80. So, I wanna say this thing
about her laugh.
Copy !req
81. Do you know
how it's kind of like...
Copy !req
82. It's very cute,
but it's also kind of like...
Copy !req
83. - Repulsive even. Okay.
- Yeah.
Copy !req
84. And then if, uh, she laughs,
then I can point it out
Copy !req
85. and be like,
"And there it is!" you know.
Copy !req
86. I did. I said, "If everyone
knows he's a piece of shit,
Copy !req
87. "then why are we doing
a retrospective
Copy !req
88. "in the first place?"
Copy !req
89. It's like, it's so incredibly
irresponsible.
Copy !req
90. No one ever cares
until it's too late.
Copy !req
91. And then it always ends up
backfiring on me...
Copy !req
92. Emma, I'm being serious.
It's not funny.
Copy !req
93. No, I agree with you.
This is not funny at all.
Copy !req
94. It's very serious.
Copy !req
95. You're laughing.
Copy !req
96. "I love how you
always find a way
Copy !req
97. "to turn my drama
into a comedy."
Copy !req
98. And then, uh...
Copy !req
99. - I don't know.
- What?
Copy !req
100. I kind of wanna
say something about...
Copy !req
101. - No.
- No?
Copy !req
102. Why do you want to talk about
fucking in front of your family?
Copy !req
103. Or her family?
Copy !req
104. No, I don't wanna
say it, like, directly.
Copy !req
105. I just wanna kind of allude
to it somehow
Copy !req
106. 'cause I just think
we've always had this sort of...
Copy !req
107. Like an incredible chemistry
that's just... I...
Copy !req
108. Yeah, no, do that.
Copy !req
109. Do exactly that.
Copy !req
110. - Okay?
- Okay, what if I said...
Copy !req
111. licentious.
Copy !req
112. Or languorous.
Copy !req
113. Just skip this part completely.
Copy !req
114. What, and just go straight
to the crying thing?
Copy !req
115. It's just, you know,
Copy !req
116. it's my first time
saying it out loud,
Copy !req
117. so I feel like I'll get it
on the day, you know.
Copy !req
118. Maybe you should start
with something funny,
Copy !req
119. so you're not, like,
immediately in tears.
Copy !req
120. But it's kind of sweet.
It's endearing.
Copy !req
121. Yeah, but you wanna look good.
Copy !req
122. Crying makes you look
kind of ugly.
Copy !req
123. - What?
- You, the general you.
Copy !req
124. Like, women.
Copy !req
125. Um, what about
the first time you met?
Copy !req
126. Wasn't that
kind of a funny story?
Copy !req
127. I love that book. I just...
Copy !req
128. Oh, no, she can't tell that one.
Copy !req
129. Why not?
Copy !req
130. What stories are you gonna do?
Copy !req
131. What do you mean? For my speech?
Copy !req
132. Yeah.
Copy !req
133. Well, you'll just
have to wait and see.
Copy !req
134. No, no, no.
So we don't, you know,
Copy !req
135. like, say the same things.
Copy !req
136. Are you gonna use
the first time we met?
Copy !req
137. Yes.
Copy !req
138. Okay, well,
what about the first date?
Copy !req
139. - Yeah, of course.
- Fuck!
Copy !req
140. You don't have to do a speech.
Copy !req
141. First kiss?
Copy !req
142. Wait, so you can just,
like, go in whenever?
Copy !req
143. Yeah,
I do it all the time.
Copy !req
144. Oh, so you bring
all the girls here?
Copy !req
145. Um, yeah.
Copy !req
146. - Ouch.
- No,
Copy !req
147. when I'm working late and stuff.
Copy !req
148. Yeah, when you're working late
and stuff.
Copy !req
149. Yeah.
Copy !req
150. Okay, this is like...
Copy !req
151. This is like a childhood dream,
you know,
Copy !req
152. like sneaking into a mall
or a library at night. It's...
Copy !req
153. Well, your dreams
are about to come true.
Copy !req
154. Wow.
Copy !req
155. Um...
Copy !req
156. Is it not working?
Copy !req
157. Hm.
Copy !req
158. Oh, sh...
Copy !req
159. Um... Ooh!
Copy !req
160. Wait, so he trapped you?
Copy !req
161. It wasn't planned, Rachel.
Copy !req
162. What about that time
you thought you had a...
Copy !req
163. - Who was that?
- Hm?
Copy !req
164. Oh, uh, it's just Charlie.
I left my wallet.
Copy !req
165. Hm. Who's Charlie?
Copy !req
166. Uh, he's my boyfriend, I guess.
Copy !req
167. Are you okay?
Copy !req
168. Yeah. No, I'm fine.
Copy !req
169. I don't know.
Can you just...
Copy !req
170. She's saying it's her chest...
Copy !req
171. It's her heart. Her heart is...
Copy !req
172. So what was it?
Copy !req
173. It was just, like, feelings.
Copy !req
174. - Feelings? What do you mean?
- Yeah.
Copy !req
175. Like intense butterflies.
Copy !req
176. - Right?
- No, I get that,
Copy !req
177. but it wasn't your first time.
Copy !req
178. I don't know.
Copy !req
179. So you're saying
Charlie is your first...
Copy !req
180. Love... Yeah.
Copy !req
181. Your first love
or your first crush?
Copy !req
182. Both, I think.
Copy !req
183. - What, is that insane?
- At 30?
Copy !req
184. Well, I mean,
I was 28 when we met, so...
Copy !req
185. Still!
Copy !req
186. I don't know. I used to be ugly.
Copy !req
187. Oh, come on!
Copy !req
188. Don't freak out,
Copy !req
189. but there's a giant spider
Copy !req
190. that's crawling up your back
and it's almost into your hair.
Copy !req
191. Just don't panic.
Copy !req
192. Nothing?
Copy !req
193. - No.
- No.
Copy !req
194. I feel like
you just have to do it louder.
Copy !req
195. Okay. Um...
Copy !req
196. I love you so much it hurts.
Copy !req
197. I can't be without you.
Copy !req
198. It's scary
'cause I can't imagine...
Copy !req
199. I want to marry you
but I'm too afraid to even ask.
Copy !req
200. I think I caught that.
Copy !req
201. You did?
Copy !req
202. A hairy knife?
Copy !req
203. A what?
Copy !req
204. Did you say something
about, like, a hairy knife?
Copy !req
205. - No.
- No?
Copy !req
206. Emma, that's not even a thing.
Copy !req
207. You okay?
Copy !req
208. Yeah. No, it's good.
Copy !req
209. Oh, come on, you gotta be
a bit more specific than that.
Copy !req
210. Yeah, it's a little corny
Copy !req
211. in a wedding speech kind of way,
but it's, um...
Copy !req
212. All the pieces are there,
you know.
Copy !req
213. I think you have it.
Copy !req
214. All right, you can't cry
Copy !req
215. and say it sucks.
Copy !req
216. And looking at each other.
Copy !req
217. Nice.
Copy !req
218. Slide... and two.
Copy !req
219. Nice.
Copy !req
220. And kiss. Great.
Copy !req
221. Ready and drag.
Copy !req
222. Step, step.
Copy !req
223. Step, step. Drag.
Copy !req
224. Step, step.
Copy !req
225. And under.
Copy !req
226. And arm up.
Copy !req
227. Good.
Copy !req
228. Playing.
Copy !req
229. Ready and left arm.
Copy !req
230. Down, up, up. Down, up, up.
Copy !req
231. And switch.
Copy !req
232. Oh.
Copy !req
233. Oh?
Copy !req
234. Good.
Copy !req
235. And this time, Emma,
go around a full circle.
Copy !req
236. Great.
Copy !req
237. Ready and step.
Copy !req
238. And turn.
Copy !req
239. And step.
Copy !req
240. And turn.
Copy !req
241. And step.
Copy !req
242. Ready and drag,
step, step, in.
Copy !req
243. Turn out.
Copy !req
244. Good.
Copy !req
245. Oh.
Copy !req
246. Nearly there.
Copy !req
247. Okay, not bad.
Okay.
Copy !req
248. Not bad.
Copy !req
249. Still a little difficulty
in the middle section,
Copy !req
250. but overall much better.
Copy !req
251. Yeah.
Thanks.
Copy !req
252. Let's just do it again?
Copy !req
253. Okay.
Okay.
Copy !req
254. What?
Copy !req
255. I just... I don't know,
Copy !req
256. I feel like we should
just dance normally, right?
Copy !req
257. What do you mean?
Copy !req
258. Well, just the...
Copy !req
259. I don't know, it kinda
feels a little performative.
Copy !req
260. It's a wedding.
It's performative by nature.
Copy !req
261. Yeah. I think
if we just do it...
Copy !req
262. a couple more times,
Copy !req
263. I'm gonna get it perfect,
I swear.
Copy !req
264. I can't make up new
choreography right on the spot.
Copy !req
265. Yeah.
Copy !req
266. Okay, well, just hear me out.
Copy !req
267. - Hear me out. Please. Please.
- No, Emma. Please.
Copy !req
268. - Please, please, please.
- Emma.
Copy !req
269. What's this?
Copy !req
270. She puts this on
when I'm in a bad mood
Copy !req
271. just to fuck with me.
Copy !req
272. You like
this song. You do.
Copy !req
273. - You fucking dance.
- No.
Copy !req
274. Dance with me.
Copy !req
275. - Come on.
- No.
Copy !req
276. Yes, it's cute. Yes.
Copy !req
277. Hey, can we stop fucking around?
Copy !req
278. What the fuck was that about?
Copy !req
279. It's like why does
she care so much?
Copy !req
280. She just doesn't like it
Copy !req
281. when you don't
take her seriously enough.
Copy !req
282. Shut up. You know what I mean!
Copy !req
283. You know,
she's just like so intense.
Copy !req
284. - Uh-huh.
- And she doesn't smile.
Copy !req
285. Like, I've literally
never seen her smile.
Copy !req
286. "It's performative by nature."
Copy !req
287. What?
Copy !req
288. I think that was Pauline.
Copy !req
289. Oh, where?
Copy !req
290. Um...
Copy !req
291. She's on the corner,
like, smoking heroin.
Copy !req
292. Wait.
Are you serious?
Copy !req
293. Yeah.
Copy !req
294. Wait, like our Pauline?
Copy !req
295. Uh-huh.
Copy !req
296. No. I mean, it's probably not.
Copy !req
297. - That's her. Uh...
- Okay.
Copy !req
298. - Look. Go look.
- Okay.
Copy !req
299. It was her.
It was the fucking wedding DJ.
Copy !req
300. - You're kidding!
- Are you sure it was heroin?
Copy !req
301. Well, we can't prove
it was heroin.
Copy !req
302. It was like
she was smoking a thing
Copy !req
303. out of, like, a piece of foil.
Copy !req
304. Yeah, yeah.
Copy !req
305. Like, what else
could that possibly be?
Copy !req
306. Did you talk to her?
Copy !req
307. No, no. She didn't see us.
Copy !req
308. Wait,
what are you gonna do?
Copy !req
309. I don't know. I think we just
get somebody else, I guess.
Copy !req
310. The wedding is this Saturday.
Copy !req
311. Well, we just get, like,
a playlist or something, no?
Copy !req
312. No.
You need a DJ, trust me.
Copy !req
313. Who did yours again?
Copy !req
314. No one. It was a disaster.
Copy !req
315. Are you just afraid you're not
gonna find someone else?
Copy !req
316. No, I just... I don't know.
It's not a deal-breaker, right?
Copy !req
317. Like, people do drugs. It's...
Copy !req
318. Babe, there's drugs
and then there's heroin.
Copy !req
319. That's the line?
Copy !req
320. She's not performing surgery.
She's, like, a... She's a DJ.
Copy !req
321. But isn't it more the fact
Copy !req
322. that she was doin' it
out in the street?
Copy !req
323. Doesn't that say something
about where she's at in life?
Copy !req
324. Okay, she wasn't, like,
"on the street."
Copy !req
325. It was like...
Copy !req
326. It was like a party
or something.
Copy !req
327. There was a whole bunch
of other crackheads.
Copy !req
328. Why are you trying to be
her publicist all of a sudden?
Copy !req
329. I don't know.
I just don't wanna dismiss her
Copy !req
330. 'cause of this one thing.
You know?
Copy !req
331. Just checking in.
How was that mushroom risotto?
Copy !req
332. - It was so good.
- It was really, really good.
Copy !req
333. - Yeah.
- Yeah?
Copy !req
334. You need more time to think
or can we commit?
Copy !req
335. - Do you wanna... Let's commit.
- Yeah.
Copy !req
336. Aw.
Copy !req
337. Yes, we commit to it.
Copy !req
338. We'll commit to it.
Just so you know,
Copy !req
339. it kinda has to be
final this time, so...
Copy !req
340. Oh, yeah, yeah. Yeah,
we totally get it. Thank you.
Copy !req
341. And, um, can I ask,
is there any way
Copy !req
342. of getting another glass
of the skin contact?
Copy !req
343. 'Cause I haven't quite made
my mind up about the wine yet.
Copy !req
344. - Okay.
- Yeah, me too, actually. Sorry.
Copy !req
345. Mike.
Copy !req
346. We're not a bar.
Copy !req
347. Cheers!
Copy !req
348. Love you guys.
Copy !req
349. You know, I barely touched
the food at our wedding.
Copy !req
350. - Too much adrenaline.
- Yeah.
Copy !req
351. And then
we ran around at 2:00 a.m.
Copy !req
352. looking for a slice of pizza.
Copy !req
353. We should go to the diner.
Copy !req
354. - What, Andy's?
- Yeah. Yeah.
Copy !req
355. Yeah, and they're, like,
they're open late.
Copy !req
356. Um, what, on our wedding night?
Copy !req
357. - Andy's?
- Yeah. It'll be fun.
Copy !req
358. You know, like actors
when they win the Oscar
Copy !req
359. and they, like,
go in their tuxes,
Copy !req
360. and it's fancy,
and they order hamburgers.
Copy !req
361. - Cute.
- It's cool.
Copy !req
362. Yeah. I mean, like...
Yeah. Maybe.
Copy !req
363. Don't they actually sell crack
out of that place?
Copy !req
364. Yes. That reminds me,
Copy !req
365. what are we gonna
do about DJ Overdose?
Copy !req
366. Don't be mean.
No.
Copy !req
367. Just replace her.
It can't be that hard.
Copy !req
368. This wouldn't
even be a conversation
Copy !req
369. if we hadn't, like,
randomly seen her today.
Copy !req
370. Yeah, but we did, and now
I'm gonna fixate over it.
Copy !req
371. Okay, but that's
a you problem though.
Copy !req
372. Okay, what if
she was a pedophile?
Copy !req
373. What?
- Mike.
Copy !req
374. What?
Copy !req
375. What would it take
for you to fire her?
Copy !req
376. - Okay.
- Really fucking different,
Copy !req
377. I feel like,
from doing drugs, right?
Copy !req
378. - Like, that's...
- Mike, everybody knows
Copy !req
379. if you bring
a pedo to a wedding,
Copy !req
380. it's just like...
Copy !req
381. - It's bad vibes.
- Bad vibes all round.
Copy !req
382. True. But a heroin addict,
on the other hand...
Copy !req
383. That could be great vibes.
Copy !req
384. - 'Cause that's party vibes.
- Party vibes.
Copy !req
385. - Exactly.
- It might be a little fun!
Copy !req
386. For all we know, we could have
caught her on her worst day.
Copy !req
387. Yeah, but you caught her.
Isn't that the point?
Copy !req
388. Why are you acting like
you've never done anything bad?
Copy !req
389. Not that bad.
Copy !req
390. What about the dog story?
Copy !req
391. Hey, don't.
Copy !req
392. What?
Copy !req
393. Wow, okay.
What's the dog story?
Copy !req
394. It's nothing.
Copy !req
395. Just tell the story.
Copy !req
396. No, I... Rachel, please.
Copy !req
397. Before we got married,
Copy !req
398. we did this thing where we said
the worst thing we've ever done.
Copy !req
399. Yes, and then we said
we'd never speak about it again.
Copy !req
400. - Are you kidding me?
- Oh.
Copy !req
401. Just...
Copy !req
402. It's fine.
Copy !req
403. Do you want me to tell it?
Copy !req
404. No, I don't want
anyone to tell it.
Copy !req
405. Wait...
Copy !req
406. did you, like, fuck a dog?
Copy !req
407. I didn't fuck a dog, Charlie.
Copy !req
408. I thought that's
what you were gonna say.
Copy !req
409. Come on. I'll do mine too.
Copy !req
410. Oh, fuck, man.
Copy !req
411. Okay, I'll tell mine
if we all do it.
Copy !req
412. - Great.
- Sure.
Copy !req
413. - Yeah? Promise?
- Mm-hm.
Copy !req
414. Promise.
Copy !req
415. - Okay. What?
- Okay.
Copy !req
416. This is about an ex-girlfriend
I was dating
Copy !req
417. when I was in college.
Copy !req
418. Who, Tessa?
Copy !req
419. Yeah.
Copy !req
420. So, we'd been dating
for about a year,
Copy !req
421. and it was her birthday,
Copy !req
422. so we went down to Mexico
to celebrate,
Copy !req
423. and she, look,
she had anger issues,
Copy !req
424. and she didn't really
seem grateful for the trip,
Copy !req
425. and we argued a lot.
Copy !req
426. - It was really exhausting...
- Don't sugarcoat it.
Copy !req
427. Okay, I'm just saying,
Copy !req
428. you know, the vibes
were already off, all right?
Copy !req
429. So, okay, anyway,
Copy !req
430. um, one night we're walking home
from a bar.
Copy !req
431. This was actually
on her birthday.
Copy !req
432. Um, yeah, and, uh...
Copy !req
433. we're cutting through this
back alley to get to our place,
Copy !req
434. and this dog comes
out of nowhere, barking.
Copy !req
435. And no owner in sight.
Just a wild, crazy street dog.
Copy !req
436. And, um...
Copy !req
437. instinctively,
she starts kicking at it,
Copy !req
438. which only makes the dog
more aggressive, and...
Copy !req
439. Right.
Copy !req
440. it actually
starts biting her.
Copy !req
441. And what did you do?
Copy !req
442. Um...
Copy !req
443. I kinda sorta
just moved behind...
Copy !req
444. - He used her as a human shield.
- No! I...
Copy !req
445. That's what you said.
Copy !req
446. You said you held her
in front of you
Copy !req
447. to avoid getting bitten.
Copy !req
448. Yeah, okay. I used her
as a human shield.
Copy !req
449. - Fine.
- Thank you.
Copy !req
450. On her birthday. Wow.
Copy !req
451. I mean, like it makes
a difference, really.
Copy !req
452. What a horrible
little piece of shit you were.
Copy !req
453. Oh, no, he still is.
Copy !req
454. Yeah, okay.
Let's hear yours, then.
Copy !req
455. No, I regret it.
Copy !req
456. No, Rachel, you have to.
Copy !req
457. I can't! No, I can't.
I'm sorry, I can't.
Copy !req
458. If you don't tell them,
Copy !req
459. I will and I'll make it
sound so much worse.
Copy !req
460. Okay, just give me a second.
Copy !req
461. I need a moment.
Copy !req
462. Okay, she...
Copy !req
463. I locked a kid in a closet.
Copy !req
464. - Okay.
- No, come on, the full story.
Copy !req
465. All right, so...
Copy !req
466. I had this really
weird neighbor growing up.
Copy !req
467. He was a few years
younger than me.
Copy !req
468. He was a little slow.
Copy !req
469. And he came over
to my house one day
Copy !req
470. wanting to show me
some abandoned RV
Copy !req
471. that he had found in the woods.
Copy !req
472. And I don't know,
I must have been bored that day
Copy !req
473. because I just went with it.
Copy !req
474. And it was really
out of the way.
Copy !req
475. Like, deep in the forest.
Copy !req
476. And when we got there,
it was disgusting.
Copy !req
477. It smelled bad,
Copy !req
478. and there was beer bottles
and porn everywhere.
Copy !req
479. Oh, this is where you met Mike.
Copy !req
480. Fuck you.
Copy !req
481. And at first, I was like,
"Why am I here?"
Copy !req
482. And then I noticed
this empty closet,
Copy !req
483. and I dared him to get in it.
Copy !req
484. And I don't know
what came over me,
Copy !req
485. but I slammed the door
and I locked it.
Copy !req
486. And he immediately started
screaming, like, really loud.
Copy !req
487. And I didn't know what to do,
so I ran away.
Copy !req
488. Yeah.
Copy !req
489. Wait, why didn't you
just open it?
Copy !req
490. Well, he was, like, going crazy,
Copy !req
491. and it freaked me out,
Copy !req
492. so I just ran home
and I didn't say anything.
Copy !req
493. What?
And, uh...
Copy !req
494. Wait, what...
What happened to him?
Copy !req
495. I don't know.
Copy !req
496. Wait, what do you mean?
Copy !req
497. - I remember...
- That's dark, Rachel!
Copy !req
498. I remember his dad
coming over later that day.
Copy !req
499. He asked me what was going on,
and if I knew where his son was.
Copy !req
500. And I was just so scared
that I was gonna get in trouble
Copy !req
501. that I didn't tell him.
Copy !req
502. And the next morning
when I woke up,
Copy !req
503. there was, like, a full
search party going.
Copy !req
504. - You left him there overnight?
- Yeah.
Copy !req
505. But they found him.
They found him. Don't worry.
Copy !req
506. He's alive! He's alive.
Copy !req
507. But no one ever
asked me about it,
Copy !req
508. and it never came back to me,
for some reason.
Copy !req
509. Yeah, 'cause he was
terrified of you obviously.
Copy !req
510. Yeah. Maybe.
Copy !req
511. Well, what would you have done
if they hadn't found him?
Copy !req
512. Oh, I would have said something.
Copy !req
513. It kinda sounds like you didn't.
Copy !req
514. Well, they found him.
I didn't have to say anything.
Copy !req
515. - What's yours, then, Charlie?
- Yeah, come on, Charlie.
Copy !req
516. Oh, um...
Copy !req
517. What's the worst thing
I've ever done?
Copy !req
518. And don't fuck around, man.
The worst one.
Copy !req
519. Mm-hm.
Don't bullshit us.
Copy !req
520. I...
Copy !req
521. Fuck. I... I don't know.
I don't know.
Copy !req
522. I don't know.
I honestly don't know.
Copy !req
523. No, fuck that.
You have to say something.
Copy !req
524. Um...
Copy !req
525. Um...
I cyberbullied someone
Copy !req
526. really badly
when I was in school.
Copy !req
527. Mm-hm. Mm-hm.
Copy !req
528. - When?
- Um...
Copy !req
529. - I must have been 14, I think.
- This fucking guy, man.
Copy !req
530. Yeah, but, like, how bad
are we talking?
Copy !req
531. No, badly. He moved.
His entire family moved.
Copy !req
532. Because of the bullying?
Copy !req
533. Yeah. Yeah. Like, yeah.
Copy !req
534. But when I think about it,
Copy !req
535. it could have been
a coincidence.
Copy !req
536. Lame.
Come on.
Copy !req
537. But they did move.
And he was crying!
Copy !req
538. I made him cry
a bunch of times.
Copy !req
539. You were 14! Who cares?
Copy !req
540. Your brain doesn't even
fully develop until you're 25.
Copy !req
541. And yours never got there?
Copy !req
542. Why are we all
ganging up on me today?
Copy !req
543. - I didn't say anything.
- Yeah, that's true.
Copy !req
544. - Thank you, Emma. You're sweet.
- Oh, Emma. What about Emma?
Copy !req
545. I didn't mean...
No, I think you were still...
Copy !req
546. No, no, no, no.
He's disqualified.
Copy !req
547. We're moving on. Come on.
Copy !req
548. Yeah, come on,
give us something good.
Copy !req
549. Give us some hot tea, Emma.
Copy !req
550. Hm.
Copy !req
551. Do you know what it is?
Copy !req
552. Uh, I don't know.
Copy !req
553. Do I know what this is?
Copy !req
554. Come on.
Copy !req
555. Come on.
Copy !req
556. Don't pussy out on us now.
Copy !req
557. Okay. I, um...
Copy !req
558. I, like...
Copy !req
559. almost did a mass shooting.
Copy !req
560. No, what do you mean?
What do you mean?
Copy !req
561. Uh...
Copy !req
562. Like, um, when I was 15,
Copy !req
563. I was, like, really, really
fucked-up back then,
Copy !req
564. and, um, yeah,
Copy !req
565. I planned to bring
a weapon to school.
Copy !req
566. And, like, do a school shooting?
Copy !req
567. What?
Copy !req
568. Yeah, I think I was, like,
actually gonna do it.
Copy !req
569. I think I almost did one.
Copy !req
570. Oh, come on.
Copy !req
571. You're joking.
You, like, fantasized about it.
Copy !req
572. No, like, I had a weapon,
Copy !req
573. and I brought it
to school which is...
Copy !req
574. Yeah.
Copy !req
575. What weapon?
Copy !req
576. It was my dad's rifle.
Copy !req
577. No. No, I don't
believe this for a second.
Copy !req
578. No, it's true. I mean,
it's actually why I'm deaf.
Copy !req
579. I was practicing in the woods,
and I held the gun too close.
Copy !req
580. What?
Copy !req
581. Yeah.
Copy !req
582. You said you had that
since birth.
Copy !req
583. What are you...
Copy !req
584. Well, I didn't, like,
wanna say, but, um...
Copy !req
585. Yeah.
Copy !req
586. I was holding it,
and then my ear popped.
Copy !req
587. And there was all this blood,
Copy !req
588. and yeah, that was that. Yeah.
Copy !req
589. But I didn't...
Copy !req
590. I didn't do anything.
Copy !req
591. I didn't, like,
actually do anything.
Copy !req
592. I know it's, like, insane
to have the fucking, like, idea,
Copy !req
593. but I didn't...
Copy !req
594. I... Yeah, I didn't
actually do anything.
Copy !req
595. Oh.
Copy !req
596. You know
my cousin's in a wheelchair
Copy !req
597. because of a shooting, right?
Copy !req
598. I... I didn't know that, no.
Copy !req
599. Are you fucking serious?
Copy !req
600. Wait...
Wait, are you...
Copy !req
601. Are you being serious about...
Is this a real thing? Like...
Copy !req
602. This is...
Copy !req
603. so disturbing,
Copy !req
604. I don't even know
how to respond to this.
Copy !req
605. Um, I'm... I'm sorry.
I shouldn't have said anything.
Copy !req
606. You planned a school shooting?
Copy !req
607. - I mean, I was 15 years old.
- Rachel. Rachel. Don't...
Copy !req
608. Oh, you were 15? So,
what, does that make it okay?
Copy !req
609. You were 15?
Copy !req
610. No, that's not what I'm saying.
I just...
Copy !req
611. - Um, I'm sorry. I'm drunk.
- Oh, you're drunk,
Copy !req
612. so what does that mean?
Are you lying?
Copy !req
613. Rachel, just stop
yelling at her. What the...
Copy !req
614. Stop yelling?
Copy !req
615. You know what? Fuck this.
We're leaving. Mike!
Copy !req
616. Rachel, I know that
this sounds insane.
Copy !req
617. I get that.
Copy !req
618. It's just that, like,
at the time
Copy !req
619. I was really depressed, and I...
Copy !req
620. Um, hey, look, Rach,
I'm gonna order an Uber.
Copy !req
621. Can we just calm down
for a second?
Copy !req
622. Sam is actually
paralyzed because of that.
Copy !req
623. Who's Sam?
Copy !req
624. My cousin. My fucking cousin.
Copy !req
625. I'm sorry, I didn't know
what his name was.
Copy !req
626. Samantha.
I've told you about her.
Copy !req
627. - Is everything all right?
- Yeah, can we get some water...
Copy !req
628. Oh, my God.
Shit.
Copy !req
629. Seven minutes.
Copy !req
630. You do have the keys.
They're in your purse.
Copy !req
631. Charlie, I don't have the key.
I checked.
Copy !req
632. I checked. On the way here,
Copy !req
633. I already checked.
Copy !req
634. - They're not in there.
- I...
Copy !req
635. You see?
Copy !req
636. - I can hear them.
- I did this already.
Copy !req
637. Oh.
Copy !req
638. - Charlie, I didn't mean...
- Emma.
Copy !req
639. for tonight to be...
Copy !req
640. - I didn't mean...
- I don't...
Copy !req
641. Let's just talk about it
in the morning.
Copy !req
642. Are you sure?
'Cause I feel like...
Copy !req
643. Yes, you're fucked up.
Copy !req
644. I don't want to talk to you
right now. So...
Copy !req
645. I'm not fucked up.
You are.
Copy !req
646. Let's just go to bed.
Copy !req
647. Okay.
Copy !req
648. How'd you get so drunk?
Copy !req
649. - Is that you?
- Yeah.
Copy !req
650. What? When did you wear glasses?
Copy !req
651. - Can you send this to me?
- No, no, I cannot.
Copy !req
652. - Why not?
- Because I look insane.
Copy !req
653. Fuck!
Copy !req
654. Charlie.
Copy !req
655. Charlie.
Copy !req
656. I mean, she's insane.
She's insane, right?
Copy !req
657. Yeah, I mean,
she's obviously not the person
Copy !req
658. you thought she was.
Copy !req
659. The fucking wedding
is this weekend.
Copy !req
660. My family's flying in on Friday.
Copy !req
661. And I've spent
so much fucking money.
Copy !req
662. No, we'll worry about
that stuff later, all right?
Copy !req
663. You're not marrying
a psychopath, right?
Copy !req
664. Fly back to London.
Leave right now.
Copy !req
665. Don't even go back
to the apartment.
Copy !req
666. Get away as fast you can.
I'll take care of it.
Copy !req
667. I'll call the police.
Copy !req
668. I'll beat her up.
Whatever you want.
Copy !req
669. Thank you.
Copy !req
670. I'm really sorry
about last night.
Copy !req
671. Um...
Copy !req
672. Yeah.
No. That was, uh...
Copy !req
673. Do you hate me?
Copy !req
674. No.
Copy !req
675. - Just that...
- What?
Copy !req
676. I mean, was it true?
Copy !req
677. I just...
Copy !req
678. There's no way. I mean...
Copy !req
679. I'm just having
a really hard time believing...
Copy !req
680. Why would I make something
like that up? It's...
Copy !req
681. So you were just
never gonna tell me?
Copy !req
682. Maybe.
Copy !req
683. Then why say it
in front of everybody?
Copy !req
684. I didn't fucking plan it,
you know?
Copy !req
685. It just... I was drunk.
I mean...
Copy !req
686. Hm.
Copy !req
687. I mean, were you...
Copy !req
688. Can we just forget about it?
Copy !req
689. Like, I won't bring it up.
Copy !req
690. You don't bring it up
and we just,
Copy !req
691. like, forget about it.
We just don't...
Copy !req
692. I kind of think I have to know,
Copy !req
693. 'cause...
Copy !req
694. otherwise I'm gonna be assuming
you're like a psychopath.
Copy !req
695. I mean...
Copy !req
696. Like, why...
How did you even get the...
Copy !req
697. Why did you want
to shoot up your school?
Copy !req
698. - God, don't say it like that.
- Well, that's what you said.
Copy !req
699. - I just...
- You said you planned
Copy !req
700. - a school shooting.
- Okay, I get it. Just please.
Copy !req
701. Please.
Copy !req
702. I don't want you
to fixate on this.
Copy !req
703. - You know how you are. You do.
- What the fuck
Copy !req
704. - are you talking about?
- You fixate on things
Copy !req
705. - and you can't stop thinking...
- Think it's gonna be better...
Copy !req
706. We should just do this later.
Copy !req
707. Why?
Copy !req
708. Well, because I feel like shit,
Copy !req
709. and we're supposed
to meet Frances.
Copy !req
710. Okay, just cancel Frances.
Like...
Copy !req
711. No, we can't.
Copy !req
712. I mean, it's, like,
her only time apparently.
Copy !req
713. You know,
unless you don't
Copy !req
714. want to go through with it
anymore.
Copy !req
715. Do you not want to get married?
Copy !req
716. Emma, of course I want
to get married.
Copy !req
717. I just... I just want to
be able to talk to you about it.
Copy !req
718. Like was this... When was this?
It was in high school?
Copy !req
719. Then we sort of
settled down
Copy !req
720. when I was, like, seven.
Copy !req
721. And I was fine then, I think.
I had friends and stuff.
Copy !req
722. Um...
Copy !req
723. Then we moved
again when I was, like, 14.
Copy !req
724. Where to?
Copy !req
725. - Uh, Louisiana.
- Right.
Copy !req
726. Yeah, I just...
Copy !req
727. I didn't make any new friends
Copy !req
728. and I thought
everyone hated me and I...
Copy !req
729. Sorry.
Copy !req
730. Fuck you!
Copy !req
731. - And that was it?
- No, no...
Copy !req
732. I mean, like,
there was other stuff...
Copy !req
733. I just... That was one example.
Copy !req
734. Ever heard of deodorant?
Copy !req
735. Bitch.
Copy !req
736. You know, like, shit like that.
Copy !req
737. So how'd you go
from there to, like...
Copy !req
738. How does a child
even get the idea?
Copy !req
739. I mean, it wasn't...
Copy !req
740. like, an original idea.
Copy !req
741. I mean, there were shootings
all the time.
Copy !req
742. I guess I was just,
like, intrigued.
Copy !req
743. Intrigued?
Copy !req
744. Yeah.
Copy !req
745. By what?
Copy !req
746. Like,
the aesthetics of it.
Copy !req
747. Of what?
Copy !req
748. Of shootings.
Copy !req
749. It was, like, a whole thing
online and I just...
Copy !req
750. I think I just thought
it looked cool.
Copy !req
751. I don't know.
I just started to believe
Copy !req
752. this character
that I was playing.
Copy !req
753. And I guess it got me
a lot of attention,
Copy !req
754. 'cause I was a girl.
Copy !req
755. - Shit.
- What?
Copy !req
756. We have to go.
Copy !req
757. I'll shoot you first.
Copy !req
758. Then your parents,
Copy !req
759. then I'll shoot you
and your parents.
Copy !req
760. Then I'll do the maid,
grandparents...
Copy !req
761. And you don't have
any siblings, right?
Copy !req
762. - No.
- Okay.
Copy !req
763. Uh, then I'll shoot ring bearer.
Copy !req
764. Then I'll get your full-length,
back of dress, putting on veil.
Copy !req
765. Then I'll shoot you.
Copy !req
766. Same thing,
with and without parents.
Copy !req
767. With best man,
then grandparents.
Copy !req
768. Uh, I don't think
they can make it.
Copy !req
769. They're not coming?
Copy !req
770. Just, uh, the travel
might be a bit much.
Copy !req
771. Okay, shooting grandparents TBD.
Copy !req
772. Uh, but then
I'll get your full-length
Copy !req
773. and then we'll do
a close-up of the rings.
Copy !req
774. Signing the certificate.
The first dance.
Copy !req
775. Cake cutting. Bouquet toss.
Copy !req
776. And then I'm just gonna get like
a bunch of candids throughout.
Copy !req
777. Yeah? Does that feel like
it covers everything?
Copy !req
778. Mm-hm.
Copy !req
779. - Yeah, I think so.
- Yeah?
Copy !req
780. Okay, I'll send you
the shot list
Copy !req
781. and you let me know
if you want to add anything.
Copy !req
782. - Cool.
- Yeah.
Copy !req
783. Okay.
Copy !req
784. Am I sensing some nerves?
Copy !req
785. A little camera shy?
Copy !req
786. Why don't, um...
I think that...
Copy !req
787. Why don't we, uh...
Let's do a little warm-up.
Copy !req
788. Let's do a little warm-up
so we're feeling, you know,
Copy !req
789. like revved up and comfortable
on the day. Yeah?
Copy !req
790. All right. Let's try it.
Copy !req
791. Let's do a little warm-up.
Up on our feet.
Copy !req
792. Okay. Just leave
your coats there and, um...
Copy !req
793. Yeah, just stand right there.
That's right.
Copy !req
794. That's right.
Just split that mark.
Copy !req
795. Okay. Let's see how this looks.
Copy !req
796. All right, Charlie,
can...
Copy !req
797. Move a little closer
to the love of your life.
Copy !req
798. There we go.
Copy !req
799. All right, so, um, think about
what you want to express.
Copy !req
800. Think about what you love
about your partner.
Copy !req
801. So, Emma, what's your favorite
thing about Charlie?
Copy !req
802. Um...
Copy !req
803. I, uh, love that
he's very smart.
Copy !req
804. Um...
Copy !req
805. Very caring and open-minded
and understanding.
Copy !req
806. And, um, and handsome...
obviously, so...
Copy !req
807. Uh...
Copy !req
808. Okay, good. Good, good.
Copy !req
809. Okay, so keep those things
in mind. Okay?
Copy !req
810. - Charlie.
- Hm?
Copy !req
811. What's your
favorite thing about Emma?
Copy !req
812. Um...
Sh...
Copy !req
813. She's, uh, kind
and, um, empathetic and, uh...
Copy !req
814. Funny.
Copy !req
815. She's beautiful. And empathetic.
Copy !req
816. Double empathy. That's good.
Copy !req
817. Okay, so hold on
to those thoughts, okay?
Copy !req
818. And we're just gonna send them
into the camera.
Copy !req
819. Don't forget to smile.
Copy !req
820. Really smile.
Copy !req
821. Okay. Yeah.
Copy !req
822. Just smile naturally.
Copy !req
823. Yeah, just like a... Mm.
Copy !req
824. Yeah, Charlie,
just a completely natural smile.
Copy !req
825. Yeah. Just like
Copy !req
826. how you would smile in life.
Copy !req
827. Okay. Um,
Copy !req
828. Ben, let's, um...
let's get some music.
Copy !req
829. Let's get some vibes.
Copy !req
830. Okay? Shake things up a little.
Yeah?
Copy !req
831. All right. Good, good.
Copy !req
832. That's a real smile.
Copy !req
833. That was real.
That's what I was looking for.
Copy !req
834. Okay, put a hand on his chest.
Copy !req
835. Okay. Oh, bling.
Copy !req
836. There we go. Love it. Yeah.
Copy !req
837. Okay.
Copy !req
838. And... And remember,
you know each other really well.
Copy !req
839. You're completely
comfortable together.
Copy !req
840. Okay.
Copy !req
841. Yeah.
Copy !req
842. Emma, fall into him.
Just rest your...
Copy !req
843. We're in love.
We want to show it to the world.
Copy !req
844. We found love
that we're gonna have forever.
Copy !req
845. Right. Charlie,
you're still here?
Copy !req
846. You get to be
with this beautiful woman.
Copy !req
847. Empathetic woman. You know that.
Copy !req
848. Good. Good smiles. Good smiles.
Good, you two.
Copy !req
849. Okay, that's nice.
You guys look great.
Copy !req
850. Um...
Copy !req
851. Okay. Um, you know,
I think that, um...
Copy !req
852. We'll, we'll...
Copy !req
853. - We'll get there on the day.
- Yeah.
Copy !req
854. Okay.
Copy !req
855. - Okay. Okay.
- All right.
Copy !req
856. Thank you.
Okay.
Copy !req
857. Jesus fucking...
Are you fucking kidding me?
Copy !req
858. - This is a crosswalk!
- Emma, come on.
Copy !req
859. - People fucking cross here!
- Hey, dude,
Copy !req
860. - control your girlfriend.
- Emma.
Copy !req
861. - "Control your girlfriend"?
- Emma.
Copy !req
862. Get the fuck
out of the way!
Copy !req
863. I'm not getting out
of the fucking way.
Copy !req
864. - You crazy bitch.
- It's a crosswalk, dumb-ass.
Copy !req
865. Jesus Christ.
Copy !req
866. Fuck.
Copy !req
867. Oh, Sorry.
Copy !req
868. What the fuck are you doing?
Copy !req
869. I won't do that again.
Copy !req
870. I just don't really
like being slapped.
Copy !req
871. Hey,
thanks for waiting.
Copy !req
872. So, how's it all going?
Copy !req
873. Sorry. Did I interrupt anything?
Copy !req
874. Just... No, it's great. Yeah.
Copy !req
875. Okay. Cool.
Long night?
Copy !req
876. - Yeah.
- Yeah.
Copy !req
877. Yeah, I know. Me too.
Copy !req
878. Um, should we check out...
Copy !req
879. what we were talking about?
Copy !req
880. Yeah.
Cool. Okay.
Copy !req
881. These ones just came in.
Copy !req
882. You probably noticed them.
They're a little loud, but...
Copy !req
883. Did you actually
like the lilies?
Copy !req
884. 'Cause I can call him back
if you didn't.
Copy !req
885. - Uh, no, it's fine. Yeah.
- Okay.
Copy !req
886. You okay?
Copy !req
887. How close did you get?
Copy !req
888. You probably wanna know why.
Copy !req
889. "Why'd she do it?
Copy !req
890. "What's wrong with her?"
Copy !req
891. What the fuck.
Copy !req
892. Hey, fucker.
Copy !req
893. Hey, fucker.
Copy !req
894. You wanna fucking die?
Copy !req
895. Hi.
Copy !req
896. By the time you see this,
Copy !req
897. I'll most likely
already be gone.
Copy !req
898. And now you're wondering why.
Copy !req
899. "Why did she..."
Copy !req
900. Fuck.
Copy !req
901. Oh, my God.
There's a shooting.
Copy !req
902. What?
Yeah, at the mall.
Copy !req
903. People are, like, jumping
out of windows and shit.
Copy !req
904. What? Right now?
Copy !req
905. Oh, my God.
I was just there.
Copy !req
906. What the fuck
is going on?
Copy !req
907. There was
another mass shooting?
Copy !req
908. Technically, it wasn't
a mass shooting, but yeah.
Copy !req
909. What do you mean?
Copy !req
910. Only three people died.
It has to be four or more.
Copy !req
911. Uh-huh, okay. Uh...
Copy !req
912. And that's the reason
you didn't do it?
Copy !req
913. 'Cause someone else...
Copy !req
914. That's the reason
you didn't do it, 'cause...
Copy !req
915. somebody else
just got there first?
Copy !req
916. I just got the news
that Marcus didn't make it.
Copy !req
917. What?
Copy !req
918. He passed away earlier today...
Copy !req
919. at the hospital.
Copy !req
920. Who the fuck
does something like that?
Copy !req
921. Like, what is wrong with you?
You know what I mean?
Copy !req
922. Yeah.
Copy !req
923. Yeah. It's like...
Copy !req
924. how can someone even, like...
Copy !req
925. - Get the idea?
- Yeah.
Copy !req
926. with being here
with each other
Copy !req
927. in a moment like this,
Copy !req
928. and really seeing each other,
really hearing each other,
Copy !req
929. feeling each other.
Copy !req
930. Some of us might be scared.
Copy !req
931. Some of us might be angry.
Copy !req
932. I bet some of us
are confused today, aren't we?
Copy !req
933. That's okay.
Copy !req
934. We ain't gonna run away
from those feelings today.
Copy !req
935. So here's what we're gonna do.
Copy !req
936. I wanna try
an exercise with y'all.
Copy !req
937. All right, everybody
get up on your feet real quick.
Copy !req
938. What I want you to do
Copy !req
939. is to start slowly
walking around.
Copy !req
940. Good.
Copy !req
941. Now, after a moment,
I want you to stop.
Copy !req
942. Okay, look at that person
that's right in front of you.
Copy !req
943. See if you can sense
Copy !req
944. what they're experiencing
right now.
Copy !req
945. Yeah, okay.
Any other thoughts?
Copy !req
946. I don't know. I just feel like
this is specifically
Copy !req
947. a male problem, right?
Copy !req
948. Like it's always
some angry, crazy guy.
Copy !req
949. - Emma?
- Hm?
Copy !req
950. You don't agree?
Copy !req
951. No, there's been a few.
Copy !req
952. A few what?
Copy !req
953. Mass shootings by women.
Copy !req
954. Well, not in America.
Copy !req
955. Yeah, I mean,
there's even that song,
Copy !req
956. - I Don't Like Mondays.
- What?
Copy !req
957. It's about a woman
Copy !req
958. who shot a bunch of people
from her window
Copy !req
959. because she hated Mondays.
Copy !req
960. It's not just men,
and they're not all crazy.
Copy !req
961. A lot of them
are shockingly normal.
Copy !req
962. Normal?
Copy !req
963. I mean, like, what the hell
are you talking about?
Copy !req
964. Look them in the eyes.
Copy !req
965. Acknowledge them. Be with them.
Copy !req
966. Be aware of them.
Copy !req
967. It's okay if you're emotional.
Copy !req
968. Okay, let's keep doing it.
Keep walking. Keep going.
Copy !req
969. So, uh, I was gonna ask you
if you wanted to join me
Copy !req
970. and, you know,
try to do something.
Copy !req
971. About?
Copy !req
972. Gun violence.
Copy !req
973. Oh.
Copy !req
974. 'Cause I'm just
trying to organize
Copy !req
975. a little something, you know?
Copy !req
976. Unless you, like,
love guns or something.
Copy !req
977. Yeah, no.
Copy !req
978. It's kind of like
that Louis Malle movie.
Copy !req
979. What?
Copy !req
980. Do you know the one
about the guy who wants to join
Copy !req
981. the French Resistance,
Copy !req
982. but they reject him,
so he joins the Nazis instead?
Copy !req
983. But it's, like,
the other way around.
Copy !req
984. I haven't seen that one.
Copy !req
985. I don't know,
if anyone wants to volunteer?
Copy !req
986. What about Emma?
Copy !req
987. - Me?
- Yeah.
Copy !req
988. I mean, I feel like
you'd be a good speaker.
Copy !req
989. Why?
Copy !req
990. I don't know.
I mean, it just makes sense.
Copy !req
991. I mean, you sound legit,
Copy !req
992. and I just feel like
you have the best face for it.
Copy !req
993. Okay. Yeah, Emma it is.
Copy !req
994. Okay.
Copy !req
995. Let's make the world
a better place, right?
Copy !req
996. No more guns!
No more guns!
Copy !req
997. And you didn't
feel like a fraud?
Copy !req
998. No.
Copy !req
999. It felt like finally waking up
from a bad dream.
Copy !req
1000. Just like that?
Copy !req
1001. I mean, I guess.
Copy !req
1002. Okay.
Copy !req
1003. And you never
had those issues again?
Copy !req
1004. Like what? What do you mean?
Copy !req
1005. Like...
Copy !req
1006. violent urges...
Copy !req
1007. God, no. No.
Copy !req
1008. Okay.
Copy !req
1009. But, like, when did...
Copy !req
1010. Charlie, can we stop
talking about this?
Copy !req
1011. Just... Until after the wedding?
Copy !req
1012. Because... I just... I don't...
I don't wanna ruin everything.
Copy !req
1013. And I don't want you
to look at me differently.
Copy !req
1014. And I just... I love you.
I love you so much.
Copy !req
1015. I love you too.
Copy !req
1016. Rachel's not responding.
Copy !req
1017. It's pretty late.
Copy !req
1018. Yeah, well, she's not
responding to my emails either.
Copy !req
1019. Why are you emailing her?
Copy !req
1020. 'Cause I stupidly got Alice
to hire her for this work thing.
Copy !req
1021. I'll just call Mike
in the morning.
Copy !req
1022. They probably both hate me.
Copy !req
1023. They don't hate you.
Copy !req
1024. It's gonna be all right,
I promise.
Copy !req
1025. How do you know that?
Copy !req
1026. 'Cause it's just Rachel.
She's just...
Copy !req
1027. She's just overreacting,
like she always does.
Copy !req
1028. You know...
Copy !req
1029. What?
Copy !req
1030. Freud said something like, uh,
Copy !req
1031. the feelings that we don't
talk about get buried alive,
Copy !req
1032. only to come out in uglier ways.
Copy !req
1033. Is that what you
feel right now?
Copy !req
1034. No, I just think
it's important to talk.
Copy !req
1035. Yeah.
Copy !req
1036. And we did.
Copy !req
1037. We did, yeah.
Copy !req
1038. And we're okay, right?
Copy !req
1039. Yeah.
Copy !req
1040. Morning.
Copy !req
1041. Morning. How'd you sleep?
Copy !req
1042. Not great.
Copy !req
1043. What... What are you doing?
Copy !req
1044. Just working on my speech.
Copy !req
1045. - I'm just gonna have a shower.
- Okay.
Copy !req
1046. - Hey.
- Hm?
Copy !req
1047. Kiss.
Copy !req
1048. Hey, Charlie, did you...
Copy !req
1049. Jesus, you scared me.
Copy !req
1050. I was making a smoothie.
Copy !req
1051. Why are you looking
at me like that?
Copy !req
1052. Like what?
Copy !req
1053. Like you're scared of me.
Copy !req
1054. It was just like a...
It was a reflex.
Copy !req
1055. Do you think I came in here
to stab you?
Copy !req
1056. No. What? Of course not. I...
Copy !req
1057. What was the question?
Copy !req
1058. Very funny.
Copy !req
1059. Didn't you say you had
a friend that died?
Copy !req
1060. What?
Copy !req
1061. Like,
when you were younger.
Copy !req
1062. In a car accident or something?
Copy !req
1063. Uh, yeah. My neighbor.
Copy !req
1064. Were you guys close?
Copy !req
1065. No, not really. She was
a couple of years older than me.
Copy !req
1066. And how old was she
when it happened?
Copy !req
1067. She was, like, 12.
Copy !req
1068. No shit. Wow.
Copy !req
1069. That must have been
a really crazy thing to witness,
Copy !req
1070. like, at that age.
Copy !req
1071. I didn't actually witness it.
Copy !req
1072. No, but still. You never
had therapy or anything?
Copy !req
1073. I was 10.
Copy !req
1074. Yeah, but, like, 10
is a very vulnerable age...
Copy !req
1075. - Okay, Charlie, please.
- What?
Copy !req
1076. I just... I know
what you're trying to say,
Copy !req
1077. and I don't think it's relevant.
Copy !req
1078. How do you know
if it's relevant or not
Copy !req
1079. if you haven't analyzed it?
Copy !req
1080. - Sure.
- Right?
Copy !req
1081. So, three o'clock, then?
Copy !req
1082. - What?
- For City Hall,
Copy !req
1083. for the marriage license.
Copy !req
1084. Oh, yeah. Um, yes.
Copy !req
1085. Oh, fuck. Sorry.
Copy !req
1086. Sorry. Sorry.
Copy !req
1087. - Jesus.
- Um...
Copy !req
1088. Hey.
Copy !req
1089. Uh, have you talked to Rachel?
Copy !req
1090. No, I have not.
Copy !req
1091. Oh, um, would you mind
just nudging her?
Copy !req
1092. I just haven't heard from her.
Copy !req
1093. Misha, what is this?
Copy !req
1094. Did you put this on my desk?
Copy !req
1095. No.
Copy !req
1096. Do you know who did?
Copy !req
1097. No.
Copy !req
1098. It didn't just come in the mail?
Copy !req
1099. Are you okay?
Copy !req
1100. Yeah. Sorry, what did you want?
Copy !req
1101. Just an update. She's just,
like, not responding.
Copy !req
1102. I think... I think she's just,
like, really busy.
Copy !req
1103. Doesn't need
to be right now.
Copy !req
1104. Yeah.
But she's, like, always busy.
Copy !req
1105. Like, juggling a million things.
Copy !req
1106. What does that mean?
She's not gonna do it?
Copy !req
1107. I mean... probably not.
Copy !req
1108. But this was your idea.
Copy !req
1109. Yeah, but she kind of talked me
into it, you know?
Copy !req
1110. She's in marketing.
She's just very good at that.
Copy !req
1111. Yeah.
Copy !req
1112. Okay. So, what should we do?
Copy !req
1113. I mean, honestly, I think
Copy !req
1114. we just, like, move on
with someone else, 'cause...
Copy !req
1115. She's great.
Like, don't get me wrong.
Copy !req
1116. It's just, she sucks
at time management.
Copy !req
1117. Okay.
Copy !req
1118. - Sorry.
- She's your friend.
Copy !req
1119. Is... Is everything okay?
Copy !req
1120. Yeah, I'm just...
Copy !req
1121. What?
Copy !req
1122. - Nothing.
- Okay.
Copy !req
1123. Do you... Do you need
some help? Or...
Copy !req
1124. No, just, like...
Copy !req
1125. Okay.
Copy !req
1126. Hm...
Copy !req
1127. Um, Charlie, we don't have
to do this if you don't want to.
Copy !req
1128. No, I do. I do. I do. Just...
Copy !req
1129. Just give me a second.
Copy !req
1130. Okay.
Copy !req
1131. Okay. I feel like... You have
to stop thinking about it.
Copy !req
1132. Hey, come on.
Copy !req
1133. You can't just say,
"Stop thinking about it."
Copy !req
1134. So, you are thinking about it?
Copy !req
1135. I'm not
thinking about it.
Copy !req
1136. For fuck's sakes,
I am thinking about it now.
Copy !req
1137. Let's just start over.
Copy !req
1138. Is that seat taken?
Copy !req
1139. Go ahead.
Copy !req
1140. Do you live around here?
Copy !req
1141. What?
Copy !req
1142. It's just
that you look familiar.
Copy !req
1143. Um, yeah. I'm...
Copy !req
1144. Yeah, I live near here.
Copy !req
1145. Oh, cool.
Copy !req
1146. I'm Emma, by the way.
Copy !req
1147. What's your name?
Copy !req
1148. - I don't think this is gonna...
- I'm sorry, what's your name?
Copy !req
1149. - Charlie.
- Charlie.
Copy !req
1150. What's a...
Copy !req
1151. sexy guy like you
doing out all alone?
Copy !req
1152. Emma, look...
Copy !req
1153. Do you have an accent?
What's that? Australian?
Copy !req
1154. This isn't gonna work.
Copy !req
1155. What's not gonna work?
Copy !req
1156. Look,
let's just not do this.
Copy !req
1157. - Do what?
- Just stop. Stop.
Copy !req
1158. This is stupid.
Copy !req
1159. Like, I'm not
overthinking anything.
Copy !req
1160. It's just been
a stressful week. I...
Copy !req
1161. I don't even care
about it anymore.
Copy !req
1162. - You don't?
- No.
Copy !req
1163. Well, then, why'd you
throw out the mug?
Copy !req
1164. - What mug?
- Your mug
Copy !req
1165. with the fucking gun on it.
Copy !req
1166. - I didn't.
- Yes, you did.
Copy !req
1167. I don't know. Maybe it was
fucking broken or something.
Copy !req
1168. Oh, my God.
Why are you lying about it?
Copy !req
1169. Okay, I'm sorry.
Copy !req
1170. I didn't realize the mug meant
so much to you.
Copy !req
1171. I'm sorry I threw it away.
Copy !req
1172. It's obviously not about
the fucking mug, Charlie.
Copy !req
1173. Ow! Fuck.
Copy !req
1174. - Fuck. Sorry.
- Charlie, the fuck was that?
Copy !req
1175. I'm so sorry.
I was just trying to do
Copy !req
1176. - your stupid joke thing.
- Just stop.
Copy !req
1177. - Are you all right?
- Yes, I'm fine. I'm just...
Copy !req
1178. Fuck. It's Rachel.
Copy !req
1179. Hey.
Copy !req
1180. Well, Rachel,
you're the maid of honor,
Copy !req
1181. and if you call in the middle
of the night
Copy !req
1182. and say you're not coming
to the wedding, I mean,
Copy !req
1183. that's not an aggressive move
to you?
Copy !req
1184. It was barely past 10:00.
Copy !req
1185. Still. She's devastated.
Copy !req
1186. Well, did she tell you
that she had Alice
Copy !req
1187. fire me off that project
she, like, begged me
Copy !req
1188. to help her with?
Copy !req
1189. No, no. Why would she do that?
Copy !req
1190. Because she's crazy.
Copy !req
1191. Stop... stop saying that.
Copy !req
1192. Well, how can you
even trust her?
Copy !req
1193. I mean, 'cause unlike you,
Copy !req
1194. she didn't actually
do anything, so...
Copy !req
1195. Me? What are you talking about?
Copy !req
1196. Yes. You locked a mentally
disabled child in a closet.
Copy !req
1197. - Okay, let's not...
- I never said
Copy !req
1198. - he was mentally disabled.
- Yes, you did.
Copy !req
1199. You said he was slow.
You said he was slow.
Copy !req
1200. Please let's not fight, guys.
Copy !req
1201. You're being
incredibly hypocritical.
Copy !req
1202. It was an impulse, Charlie.
Copy !req
1203. I didn't plan
a cold-blooded murder.
Copy !req
1204. Well, she didn't, like... She...
Copy !req
1205. She didn't, like, come up
with it on her own.
Copy !req
1206. What do you mean?
Copy !req
1207. 'Cause it's like a whole thing
in this country, isn't it?
Copy !req
1208. I mean, think about it.
Copy !req
1209. If there's a shooting
practically every single day,
Copy !req
1210. then imagine how many people
must have thought about it.
Copy !req
1211. Or, like, planned one.
Or even got close to it,
Copy !req
1212. but backed out
Copy !req
1213. or changed their minds
for whatever reason.
Copy !req
1214. I'm sure there's thousands
of people like that.
Copy !req
1215. We just wouldn't know 'cause
they would never tell anyone.
Copy !req
1216. They're just out there,
living normal lives.
Copy !req
1217. Really could be anyone.
Copy !req
1218. Oh. Here we go.
So it's America's fault now?
Copy !req
1219. I don't know. I think it's...
Copy !req
1220. I do think
it's a cultural thing.
Copy !req
1221. Oh, please. Look at Mike,
he grew up around guns,
Copy !req
1222. and he's terrified of them.
Copy !req
1223. I didn't grow up around guns.
Copy !req
1224. I thought you said you had
an uncle
Copy !req
1225. that owned, like,
a bunch of guns.
Copy !req
1226. Yeah, because he was a cop.
Copy !req
1227. I'm not terrified of them.
Why would you even say that?
Copy !req
1228. What,
so you like guns now?
Copy !req
1229. Look. Can I just
be completely honest?
Copy !req
1230. I was shocked, of course.
Just as much as you guys.
Copy !req
1231. Like, I...
Copy !req
1232. But...
Copy !req
1233. then we talked, and...
Copy !req
1234. and, uh, she shared some stuff
from her past that...
Copy !req
1235. I don't know. It just really
put it into perspective for me.
Copy !req
1236. Like what?
Copy !req
1237. Shout out to Sally,
you're gonna fucking die first.
Copy !req
1238. It's just...
Copy !req
1239. Uh...
Copy !req
1240. Her friend died
when she was young.
Copy !req
1241. Who?
Copy !req
1242. Her neighbor,
who she was extremely close to.
Copy !req
1243. And she died in a car crash.
Copy !req
1244. Um, and, basically, Emma had
to witness
Copy !req
1245. her best friend getting...
Copy !req
1246. Oh, my God!
No! Call 911 somebody!
Copy !req
1247. Somebody help!
Get her out of there!
Copy !req
1248. I mean, that's kind of
a big deal.
Copy !req
1249. Well, I'm sorry she had
to go through that, obviously.
Copy !req
1250. No, and it really fucked her up
Copy !req
1251. and no one ever offered her
Copy !req
1252. any therapy
or counseling or anything,
Copy !req
1253. and she just had
to carry that for years.
Copy !req
1254. And it's kind of interesting,
in a way.
Copy !req
1255. What's interesting?
Copy !req
1256. Just that...
Copy !req
1257. It's so unexpected. And...
Copy !req
1258. I don't know. I think
Copy !req
1259. it kind of makes her
Copy !req
1260. a little more interesting
to me, I guess.
Copy !req
1261. - Interesting?
- Yeah.
Copy !req
1262. Really?
Copy !req
1263. - I think what he's trying...
- I wasn't talking to you.
Copy !req
1264. Just that it's so not who
she is now.
Copy !req
1265. It's not interesting, Charlie,
Copy !req
1266. - it's awful.
- Hey, sorry, sorry.
Copy !req
1267. Rachel, um, they're asking
Copy !req
1268. if you can come approve
that Oatly deck?
Copy !req
1269. Well, just tell them it's fine.
Copy !req
1270. Um, no. But they said they need
to hear it from you directly.
Copy !req
1271. Yeah, of course.
I'm sorry. I'll be right there.
Copy !req
1272. We're gonna
have to wrap this up,
Copy !req
1273. I have a lunch.
I'm meeting Sam.
Copy !req
1274. You're meeting her now?
Copy !req
1275. Yes, I had to make sure that
she's okay with all of this.
Copy !req
1276. That she's okay with you coming
to our wedding?
Copy !req
1277. Yeah. Obviously,
I don't wanna betray her.
Copy !req
1278. Sam?
Copy !req
1279. Sam?
Copy !req
1280. - Sorry.
- Yeah?
Copy !req
1281. Rachel's cousin?
Copy !req
1282. Yeah.
Copy !req
1283. I'm friends
with Rachel and Mike.
Copy !req
1284. Oh, cool.
Copy !req
1285. And I'm... That's a great
jacket, by the way.
Copy !req
1286. Thank you. It's just Uniqlo.
Copy !req
1287. So, you guys are,
uh, really close?
Copy !req
1288. I mean, she's family.
Copy !req
1289. - Yeah.
- So...
Copy !req
1290. I mean, what does
that mean exactly?
Copy !req
1291. That she's family.
Copy !req
1292. Yeah. Well, I mean, it's just...
Copy !req
1293. She hadn't really
mentioned you before,
Copy !req
1294. so I was just, you know,
just wondering.
Copy !req
1295. Did she tell you
I was coming or...
Copy !req
1296. Yeah, I was just with her
and, um... I don't know.
Copy !req
1297. She's just...
There's some drama.
Copy !req
1298. And you know how Rachel is.
Copy !req
1299. Okay. What was your name?
Copy !req
1300. Uh, Charlie.
Copy !req
1301. Right. Great
to meet you, Charlie.
Copy !req
1302. - Just... Hey.
- Uh...
Copy !req
1303. I just... Um... I...
Copy !req
1304. I just think...
Copy !req
1305. Um...
Copy !req
1306. I think you would love Emma.
Copy !req
1307. Okay. Um... You know,
I'm actually kind of late, so...
Copy !req
1308. "Emma, true love
is sacrificing yourself,
Copy !req
1309. "humiliating yourself.
True love is egoless.
Copy !req
1310. "It's being ready
to do anything.
Copy !req
1311. "True love is complicated.
True love is acceptance.
Copy !req
1312. "True love
is radical acceptance.
Copy !req
1313. "Emma, I know
worse people than you."
Copy !req
1314. Jesus, not that.
What the fuck am I...
Copy !req
1315. Misha.
Copy !req
1316. Mm-hm?
Copy !req
1317. What's, like, the worst thing
you've ever done?
Copy !req
1318. What's the worst thing
I've ever done?
Copy !req
1319. Mm...
Copy !req
1320. Really?
Copy !req
1321. Mm...
Copy !req
1322. Cheated.
Copy !req
1323. Yeah? Like, recently or...
Copy !req
1324. No,
like, a few years ago.
Copy !req
1325. What made it so bad? Were you
in a serious relationship or...
Copy !req
1326. You don't think cheating
is bad enough?
Copy !req
1327. No, it's, like, bad.
But, like, what happened?
Copy !req
1328. Um, well, I was dating this guy,
who was very nice.
Copy !req
1329. Like, genuinely kind.
Copy !req
1330. And we lived together
for, like, two years.
Copy !req
1331. And I just could
not bring myself
Copy !req
1332. to have sex with him anymore.
Copy !req
1333. 'Cause he was too nice?
Copy !req
1334. Maybe, yeah.
Copy !req
1335. And then I started sleeping with
his older married friend,
Copy !req
1336. um, who treated me
like shit, so...
Copy !req
1337. And did you like that he treated
you like shit?
Copy !req
1338. Not necessarily, but...
Copy !req
1339. we had better sex, yeah.
Copy !req
1340. And then...
Copy !req
1341. then everybody
found out about it,
Copy !req
1342. and it was a whole fucking mess.
Copy !req
1343. Oh...
Copy !req
1344. Well, what's the worst thing
you've ever done?
Copy !req
1345. I don't know. I just...
Copy !req
1346. I wouldn't even know
how to pick.
Copy !req
1347. Because there's just too many?
Copy !req
1348. Yeah.
Copy !req
1349. All right.
Copy !req
1350. And what would you do
if you found out
Copy !req
1351. that your boyfriend, um...
Copy !req
1352. had, like, planned
a school shooting?
Copy !req
1353. Oh. Uh...
Copy !req
1354. Like... Like, if Blake did that?
Copy !req
1355. Yeah. But he didn't
actually do it.
Copy !req
1356. He... He almost did it.
Copy !req
1357. Like, he had a weapon
and everything,
Copy !req
1358. but he didn't.
Copy !req
1359. This is, like, in high school.
Copy !req
1360. Uh well, I mean,
that would scare me obviously.
Copy !req
1361. Yeah, but, like, would it change
how you felt about him?
Copy !req
1362. Well, why didn't he do it?
Copy !req
1363. I don't know.
Copy !req
1364. Like, he...
Copy !req
1365. His...
Copy !req
1366. His, uh, car broke down
and he just decided not to.
Copy !req
1367. Okay. But otherwise, he would
have just gone through with it,
Copy !req
1368. that's what you're saying?
Copy !req
1369. I don't know. The point is,
he didn't, so...
Copy !req
1370. All right, he didn't do it.
Copy !req
1371. I don't know. I guess I'd...
Copy !req
1372. call the police.
Copy !req
1373. What?
Copy !req
1374. Okay. So, you'd call
the police, yeah?
Copy !req
1375. I think so, yeah. Right?
Copy !req
1376. He's obviously not the same
person now, though.
Copy !req
1377. I mean, but the fact
that he ever was, is...
Copy !req
1378. Yeah. But you love him, yeah?
Copy !req
1379. Yeah. I love the person
that I thought he was.
Copy !req
1380. All right, what? So,
you're gonna call the police,
Copy !req
1381. and what? And have him arrested?
Like, for what?
Copy !req
1382. I don't know. Isn't that
what you're supposed to do
Copy !req
1383. if you think
that someone's a threat?
Copy !req
1384. - He was 15.
- Yeah, but come on.
Copy !req
1385. That's a huge red flag.
Copy !req
1386. Even after you've dated him
for two years?
Copy !req
1387. Three.
Copy !req
1388. - Three years.
- Yeah, but come on,
Copy !req
1389. you've seen Blake.
Copy !req
1390. I mean, he would murder me in,
like, two seconds.
Copy !req
1391. Okay. Even if he was completely
open and honest with you?
Copy !req
1392. And he told you
he regretted everything?
Copy !req
1393. Mm-hm...
Copy !req
1394. And that he made you
believe, beyond a doubt,
Copy !req
1395. that he's changed?
Copy !req
1396. I mean, isn't that exactly
what a psychopath would do?
Copy !req
1397. At the bridal table...
Copy !req
1398. - Hey.
- Where were you? I texted you.
Copy !req
1399. - I was doing a work thing.
- Okay.
Copy !req
1400. - She seems fine.
- Yeah.
Copy !req
1401. Do you want me
to talk to her or...
Copy !req
1402. No, no, no. Let's just...
Let's do it together.
Copy !req
1403. Okay.
Copy !req
1404. What the fuck was that?
Copy !req
1405. It's nothing. It's just...
Copy !req
1406. You okay?
Copy !req
1407. Yeah. I'm just, like, stressed
about the wedding and stuff.
Copy !req
1408. Like... I'm sorry.
Copy !req
1409. So, it's all good?
Copy !req
1410. Yeah. It's all set up.
Copy !req
1411. I just need to replace
some cables.
Copy !req
1412. Um...
Copy !req
1413. What was that track
you were playing in there?
Copy !req
1414. Oh, it's one of mine actually.
Copy !req
1415. Really?
Yeah, from forever ago.
Copy !req
1416. No way.
That's... That's so cool.
Copy !req
1417. Do you...
Do you still make music?
Copy !req
1418. No, not really.
Copy !req
1419. Oh, why... Why not?
Copy !req
1420. Um, just life had
different plans, I guess.
Copy !req
1421. - Are you okay?
- Yeah. I'm sorry.
Copy !req
1422. - What's going on?
- It's just... She's just, um...
Copy !req
1423. You're really...
You're talented.
Copy !req
1424. She's talented.
Copy !req
1425. Anyway. Yeah,
there was just, um, something
Copy !req
1426. we wanted to talk to you about.
Copy !req
1427. Okay.
Copy !req
1428. Uh, so, we saw you the other day
on the street.
Copy !req
1429. Hey, it's gonna be fine.
Copy !req
1430. I'm sorry. I'm sorry.
Copy !req
1431. Take a deep breath.
Copy !req
1432. I'm sorry.
It's okay. It's okay.
Copy !req
1433. It's okay. It's okay.
Copy !req
1434. Whoa...
Copy !req
1435. Heroin. You were smoking heroin.
Copy !req
1436. No.
Copy !req
1437. I don't do that.
Copy !req
1438. Uh, you can be honest,
we're not gonna tell anyone.
Copy !req
1439. Yeah, but I didn't
fucking do it.
Copy !req
1440. Jesus fucking Christ.
Copy !req
1441. Um...
Copy !req
1442. I don't know why I did that.
Copy !req
1443. - I'm sorry.
- It's okay.
Copy !req
1444. Um...
Copy !req
1445. Can you just not tell anyone
about this?
Copy !req
1446. Admit it,
and we can move on.
Copy !req
1447. - You're not in trouble.
- I think
Copy !req
1448. - we've made our point here.
- No. No.
Copy !req
1449. We saw you. You were
on Arlington, by the park.
Copy !req
1450. Right?
Copy !req
1451. - Oh, maybe...
- What?
Copy !req
1452. I mean, it was, like, dark.
Copy !req
1453. Why are you
questioning it now?
Copy !req
1454. - It's like...
- Can I be honest?
Copy !req
1455. Yes, please. That's literally
all we want from you.
Copy !req
1456. You're being a fucking cunt.
Copy !req
1457. Excuse me?
Yeah.
Copy !req
1458. Wow. Okay, you're fired.
Copy !req
1459. Please take your things
and fucking leave.
Copy !req
1460. - Are you serious?
- Yes, I'm very serious.
Copy !req
1461. - Please.
- I'm all set up.
Copy !req
1462. Take your shit.
Copy !req
1463. That was a fucking
waste of my time.
Copy !req
1464. - Thank you.
- You're a bitch.
Copy !req
1465. And you're a fucking pussy.
Copy !req
1466. Can't believe you just ripped
my shirt off.
Copy !req
1467. All right, let's bring in
Mom and Dad.
Copy !req
1468. Yes.
Copy !req
1469. Everyone, scooch in. Get close.
Copy !req
1470. Just breathe, smile.
It's a beautiful day.
Copy !req
1471. Charlie, stay with me here.
Copy !req
1472. Yes, beautiful. Happiness.
Copy !req
1473. Just relax.
And real, natural smiles.
Copy !req
1474. Back to me, Charlie and Emma,
Copy !req
1475. with those big,
beautiful smiles. Nice.
Copy !req
1476. Hello. Hi.
Copy !req
1477. Um, just wanted to welcome
everyone, and thank you all
Copy !req
1478. for being here
on this special day.
Copy !req
1479. And I think we should start off
Copy !req
1480. with a toast
to the bride and groom.
Copy !req
1481. To Emma and Charlie.
Copy !req
1482. To Emma and Charlie.
Copy !req
1483. Jesus.
Copy !req
1484. Um...
Copy !req
1485. - Be right back.
- Okay.
Copy !req
1486. Hey.
Copy !req
1487. - Hey. You the groom?
- No, I'm Mike. He's the...
Copy !req
1488. Hey. Charlie. Hey.
Copy !req
1489. Fuck her, man.
Copy !req
1490. - The other DJ.
- Oh...
Copy !req
1491. It's unbelievable.
What's the most important part
Copy !req
1492. of being a DJ?
What do you think?
Copy !req
1493. 'Cause it's not the music.
Copy !req
1494. Showing up.
Copy !req
1495. Can't DJ
if you don't show up, right?
Copy !req
1496. Did she have COVID?
Did she mention anything?
Copy !req
1497. I... She didn't
actually mention.
Copy !req
1498. 'Cause,
you know, that's legit.
Copy !req
1499. Death in the family,
that's also legit.
Copy !req
1500. Hey. Congrats, man.
Copy !req
1501. I'm Blake, Misha's boyfriend.
Copy !req
1502. Yes. Yes, of course.
Copy !req
1503. - Yes. Thanks for coming.
- Yeah,
Copy !req
1504. well, I tried to say
hi earlier, but...
Copy !req
1505. Just a busy day.
Copy !req
1506. Yeah? Well, enjoy, man.
Copy !req
1507. - Cool. Yeah, thank you.
- Yeah.
Copy !req
1508. You know, I don't know
Copy !req
1509. if she already told you,
but I've actually worked
Copy !req
1510. with one of your servers before.
Copy !req
1511. - Oh, really?
- Isn't that so funny?
Copy !req
1512. I actually think
that's a really good omen.
Copy !req
1513. So, where do I set up?
Copy !req
1514. - Mike, can you do the thing?
- Yeah.
Copy !req
1515. Yeah, cool.
Copy !req
1516. You a gearhead?
Copy !req
1517. - DJ gear?
- Yeah. I ask
Copy !req
1518. because I brought with me today
an EV Esense 8 with a Senny kit,
Copy !req
1519. and I have a Bluetti down
below for power.
Copy !req
1520. It's funny.
If you know about gear,
Copy !req
1521. - it's a rather unusual setup.
- Yeah. Okay.
Copy !req
1522. Yeah.
Copy !req
1523. Everybody, uh, it is now time
to hear a few words
Copy !req
1524. from the father of the bride.
Copy !req
1525. Oh, boy. Thank you.
Copy !req
1526. Uh...
Copy !req
1527. Emma, my girl. You look
absolutely stunning today.
Copy !req
1528. Time has flown by
way too fast, hasn't it?
Copy !req
1529. Feels like you moved out
three days ago,
Copy !req
1530. and here you are
getting married.
Copy !req
1531. You have always been
Copy !req
1532. a creative and passionate girl.
Copy !req
1533. And I don't know
if you remember this,
Copy !req
1534. but when you were young,
you had all these characters
Copy !req
1535. you would come up with.
Copy !req
1536. And you used to have
these little shows
Copy !req
1537. for your mom and me,
Copy !req
1538. using the living room
as a stage.
Copy !req
1539. I think my favorite
was the blind farmer.
Copy !req
1540. She would stumble around,
Copy !req
1541. bumping into
all this furniture, yelling,
Copy !req
1542. "Has anyone seen a brown cow?"
Copy !req
1543. But in middle school,
Copy !req
1544. you had a brief affair
with theater,
Copy !req
1545. and you were really into drama.
Copy !req
1546. But no more blind farmers.
It had to be serious.
Copy !req
1547. Preferably life or death.
Copy !req
1548. But as a teenager,
you became an activist.
Copy !req
1549. And you developed a strong
passion for gun control,
Copy !req
1550. which you got so serious about,
I had to pick you up
Copy !req
1551. from the police one time
for egging Walmart employees
Copy !req
1552. for selling weapons.
Copy !req
1553. Uh...
Copy !req
1554. Hm...
Copy !req
1555. It was obvious it came
from your big heart,
Copy !req
1556. but I have to admit,
I think part of it was about you
Copy !req
1557. rebelling against your dad, too.
Copy !req
1558. You know, the dad who works
in the military
Copy !req
1559. and happens to own a rifle.
Copy !req
1560. The same rifle
which mysteriously disappeared
Copy !req
1561. right around that time.
Copy !req
1562. You remember that?
Copy !req
1563. Wasn't that a wild coincidence?
Copy !req
1564. Sorry. Sorry.
Copy !req
1565. Sorry, everyone.
Copy !req
1566. Uh, these are not the cables
I asked for.
Copy !req
1567. Yeah...
Copy !req
1568. That was not planned,
by the way.
Copy !req
1569. All right. Um...
Copy !req
1570. You know, I kinda lost my train
of thought, so...
Copy !req
1571. Emma, Charlie, may your love
grow deeper every day.
Copy !req
1572. - Cheers.
- Cheers.
Copy !req
1573. So you always just, like,
Copy !req
1574. kept weapons around the house?
Copy !req
1575. What?
Copy !req
1576. No, I was...
Copy !req
1577. No, it was a great speech.
Copy !req
1578. - It was beautiful.
- Okay.
Copy !req
1579. Right here.
Copy !req
1580. Really good.
Copy !req
1581. Maybe
get some water and...
Copy !req
1582. No, my turn.
I wanna do my speech.
Copy !req
1583. No, I know.
I'm just saying.
Copy !req
1584. I wanna do it.
Copy !req
1585. Lower your voice,
all right?
Copy !req
1586. We're at a wedding, okay?
Just get it together.
Copy !req
1587. Goddamn it. Fuck.
Copy !req
1588. Hi, everybody, again.
Copy !req
1589. Uh, yeah.
So, now it is time for...
Copy !req
1590. to hear some words
from the maid of honor,
Copy !req
1591. Rachel.
Copy !req
1592. Hello. It's so nice
to see everyone here today.
Copy !req
1593. So, I met Charlie
through my husband, Mike,
Copy !req
1594. and a few years later,
we all got to know Emma.
Copy !req
1595. So when Emma asked me
to be her maid of honor,
Copy !req
1596. I was a bit surprised.
Copy !req
1597. I remember thinking,
"Don't you have real friends?"
Copy !req
1598. Kidding!
Copy !req
1599. Kidding.
Copy !req
1600. But seriously,
getting to know Emma,
Copy !req
1601. I have come to see how layered
and complex she is.
Copy !req
1602. Full of surprises,
like you wouldn't believe.
Copy !req
1603. Charlie, too!
Copy !req
1604. Which is why I think
Copy !req
1605. they will find happiness
in this marriage.
Copy !req
1606. Because, Emma,
Copy !req
1607. you have found a very
open-minded partner in Charlie.
Copy !req
1608. A real cheerleader, am I right?
Copy !req
1609. Oh! Mike's giving me that look.
Copy !req
1610. We're on a tight schedule,
I see.
Copy !req
1611. But, yeah.
Copy !req
1612. Um, I think you guys
are great for each other.
Copy !req
1613. I wish you all the best.
Copy !req
1614. To the happy, carefree couple.
Copy !req
1615. hypothetical
questions
Copy !req
1616. about a school shooter.
Copy !req
1617. He was, like,
asking for a friend,
Copy !req
1618. you know what I mean?
Copy !req
1619. Like, she maybe thought about
doing a school shooting.
Copy !req
1620. Oh, no.
Copy !req
1621. I know, like...
Copy !req
1622. - Hi!
- Oh. Hi, Emma.
Copy !req
1623. - Sorry, did I scare you?
- The bride. You look beautiful.
Copy !req
1624. Thank you.
Copy !req
1625. - Um...
- Um...
Copy !req
1626. Were you just talking
to someone?
Copy !req
1627. - Just now?
- Yeah.
Copy !req
1628. - Um, yeah. Yeah.
- Who?
Copy !req
1629. Um...
Copy !req
1630. - Susan.
- Susan?
Copy !req
1631. - Hm...
- Oh.
Copy !req
1632. Hm...
Copy !req
1633. What were you talking about?
Copy !req
1634. - Uh, nothing.
- Nothing?
Copy !req
1635. - Nothing. Hm...
- Oh...
Copy !req
1636. Just thought I, like,
overheard something.
Copy !req
1637. Well,
do you mind if I just...
Copy !req
1638. - Oh, sorry. Yeah.
- Can I just...
Copy !req
1639. Thank you.
Copy !req
1640. Ah!
Copy !req
1641. Can I talk with you
for a second?
Copy !req
1642. Sorry. Sorry.
Copy !req
1643. Fuck.
Can you close the door, please?
Copy !req
1644. What's going on?
Copy !req
1645. Rachel was fucking talking.
Copy !req
1646. What makes you think that?
Copy !req
1647. Because I overheard Misha
and she said something.
Copy !req
1648. What... What did she say?
Copy !req
1649. I don't know,
but she definitely said,
Copy !req
1650. "School shooting,"
and, "Don't tell anyone."
Copy !req
1651. And what,
you think Rachel told her?
Copy !req
1652. I don't know, Charlie.
I don't fucking know.
Copy !req
1653. If she knows, if Misha knows,
Copy !req
1654. then who the hell else
fucking knows?
Copy !req
1655. What, my parents?
Copy !req
1656. Oh, my God, your parents.
Copy !req
1657. Oh, my God, this cannot...
Copy !req
1658. this cannot be
fucking happening.
Copy !req
1659. What?
Copy !req
1660. It doesn't fucking matter.
It doesn't matter.
Copy !req
1661. It's gonna be okay. Okay?
Copy !req
1662. - It's gonna be fine.
- Okay. Okay.
Copy !req
1663. You promise
you didn't say anything?
Copy !req
1664. Yeah. Like, she was probably
talking about the...
Copy !req
1665. Like, there was
another one, like, a week ago.
Copy !req
1666. She was probably
talking about that.
Copy !req
1667. Okay. Well, will you go get her?
Copy !req
1668. - Get who?
- Misha, so I can talk to her.
Copy !req
1669. Uh...
Copy !req
1670. I don't know. I just don't think
Copy !req
1671. we should make a big deal
about it.
Copy !req
1672. No. No. I need to figure out
who told her. Please.
Copy !req
1673. - Okay, I'll go get her.
- Ah...
Copy !req
1674. Emma. Emma. Fuck me. Jesus.
Copy !req
1675. Can I just say, um...
Copy !req
1676. he kissed me,
Copy !req
1677. and we stopped immediately,
and it truly meant nothing.
Copy !req
1678. Wait, what? What are...
Copy !req
1679. What is she talking...
What are you talking about?
Copy !req
1680. I don't know, like,
he wasn't himself.
Copy !req
1681. He was sort of disturbed,
Copy !req
1682. and he was crying,
and I was just...
Copy !req
1683. Why was he crying?
Copy !req
1684. I don't know. He asked me
Copy !req
1685. what I would do if I...
Copy !req
1686. I just hit a wall.
I was very emotional.
Copy !req
1687. Shut the fuck up.
What were you saying?
Copy !req
1688. He asked me what I would do
if Blake did a school shooting.
Copy !req
1689. I said, "planned."
Okay, yeah.
Copy !req
1690. - He said, "planned."
- Yeah.
Copy !req
1691. And then he got really
upset, and he started crying,
Copy !req
1692. and I was just trying
to make him feel better,
Copy !req
1693. and he very clearly misread
the signals.
Copy !req
1694. I... It didn't mean any...
It was just an accident.
Copy !req
1695. It was an accident. I didn't...
Copy !req
1696. Fuck.
Copy !req
1697. Okay.
Copy !req
1698. I tell you,
it was nothing.
Copy !req
1699. I'm confused.
Copy !req
1700. Is the shooting thing real?
Copy !req
1701. I'm fine.
Copy !req
1702. You all right, dear?
Copy !req
1703. Yeah.
Copy !req
1704. Dear guests,
Copy !req
1705. it is now time
to hear a few words
Copy !req
1706. from the bride to the groom.
Copy !req
1707. No?
Copy !req
1708. Uh, sorry. Actually, the groom
Copy !req
1709. is going to speak first.
Pardon me.
Copy !req
1710. Okay.
Copy !req
1711. Um...
Copy !req
1712. Emma, I, uh...
Copy !req
1713. Um, I had a speech, but, um...
Copy !req
1714. I've forgotten everything.
Like...
Copy !req
1715. What I was gonna say was, um...
Copy !req
1716. when I first met Emma, it was
kind of like out of a movie,
Copy !req
1717. you know, like, uh...
Copy !req
1718. The meet-cute
at the coffee shop, and...
Copy !req
1719. Um...
Copy !req
1720. she was reading this book.
Copy !req
1721. What was it called again?
Copy !req
1722. It doesn't matter. But, um...
Copy !req
1723. Yeah, I hadn't read the book,
Copy !req
1724. but I pretended to
Copy !req
1725. so I could talk to her, and...
Copy !req
1726. She couldn't hear anything
'cause of...
Copy !req
1727. 'cause of the ear, and, um...
Copy !req
1728. I thought it was really sexy.
Copy !req
1729. And, um, sweet in this weird
kind of way.
Copy !req
1730. And then she had this laugh,
which is really specific,
Copy !req
1731. and I wanted to say something
about how it's, um, repulsive,
Copy !req
1732. but in a funny way,
like, it's very...
Copy !req
1733. It's very cute,
Copy !req
1734. and it's the best laugh,
and, um...
Copy !req
1735. Uh...
Copy !req
1736. I fell in love with her
just on the spot right then,
Copy !req
1737. and it's been growing
ever since.
Copy !req
1738. And you're my best friend,
Copy !req
1739. and we have, like,
Copy !req
1740. amazing, amazing sex.
Copy !req
1741. And, like, I mean...
Copy !req
1742. Whoa.
Copy !req
1743. Excuse me.
Sorry, I'm fucking this all up.
Copy !req
1744. I didn't... Just forget it.
Forget about the fucking speech.
Copy !req
1745. I don't wanna
embarrass you, Emma.
Copy !req
1746. I can't... I don't deserve you.
Copy !req
1747. And I can't believe
the level of stupidity
Copy !req
1748. that I've subjected you to.
Copy !req
1749. Oh...
Copy !req
1750. Can you just please, like...
Copy !req
1751. Can you just stop gossiping,
all right?
Copy !req
1752. It's just our wedding.
Copy !req
1753. She didn't do anything, okay?
Copy !req
1754. She didn't do anything.
Copy !req
1755. Emma, you're the love
of my life.
Copy !req
1756. I can't understand
why I would have done
Copy !req
1757. anything to hurt you, especially
not with fucking Misha.
Copy !req
1758. Jesus fucking Christ, like...
Copy !req
1759. - What the fuck does that mean?
- Nothing.
Copy !req
1760. - Did you fuck him?
- No, I didn't fuck him.
Copy !req
1761. - I don't even care.
- No, he tried to fuck me.
Copy !req
1762. I wouldn't even care.
Even if you had killed someone,
Copy !req
1763. I wouldn't even care.
It wouldn't change anything
Copy !req
1764. about the way I feel about you.
Copy !req
1765. Yeah, I said stop.
Copy !req
1766. I love you more than anything
in the world, and...
Copy !req
1767. Like,
please, fucking stop.
Copy !req
1768. I never fucking
knew about this...
Copy !req
1769. - I know, I just...
- Jesus Christ,
Copy !req
1770. can you shut the fuck up?
Copy !req
1771. Blake! Calm down, calm down.
Copy !req
1772. Whoa. Hey. Hey, hey.
Hey.
Copy !req
1773. Emma?
Copy !req
1774. Hello?
Copy !req
1775. No, she's not.
She's not here either.
Copy !req
1776. I think she's with her parents.
Copy !req
1777. Her dad texted me, but...
Copy !req
1778. No, no one's answering
their phones, so...
Copy !req
1779. Ugh! Fuck.
Copy !req
1780. Hey, Emma, I know
you don't want to talk to me,
Copy !req
1781. but, um, can you just
let me know if you're okay?
Copy !req
1782. I mean... Yeah, just text me.
Copy !req
1783. I love you.
Copy !req
1784. Did you
sexually harass Misha?
Copy !req
1785. - What?
- Yes or no.
Copy !req
1786. Um, I didn't harass her.
Copy !req
1787. Jesus!
Copy !req
1788. Goddamn it, Blake!
Copy !req
1789. Can you use your fucking words?
Copy !req
1790. Jesus!
Copy !req
1791. Have another drink!
I fucking will!
Copy !req
1792. - Stop screaming!
- Fuck you!
Copy !req
1793. Easy!
Copy !req
1794. - I'll fucking kill you!
- Shut up! Shut up...
Copy !req
1795. Where is she?
Copy !req
1796. Fuck you!
Copy !req
1797. - Where's Emma?
- Uh, she's... She's...
Copy !req
1798. No, not for me.
Copy !req
1799. You okay, hon?
Yeah.
Copy !req
1800. What can I get for you?
Copy !req
1801. Cheeseburger
and a Diet Coke, please.
Copy !req
1802. Hey.
Copy !req
1803. Hi.
Copy !req
1804. Hey.
Copy !req
1805. Can I sit?
Copy !req
1806. Yeah, of course.
Copy !req
1807. I'm sorry.
Copy !req
1808. I'm really sorry, Emma.
Copy !req
1809. Do you live around here?
Copy !req
1810. What?
Copy !req
1811. I come here sometimes, too,
Copy !req
1812. and I feel like
I've seen you here before.
Copy !req
1813. I'm Emma, by the way.
Copy !req
1814. What's your name?
Copy !req
1815. I'm Charlie.
Copy !req
1816. I live, like,
two blocks from here.
Copy !req
1817. Um, what happened to your face?
Copy !req
1818. I just got into this fight.
Um...
Copy !req
1819. There was a woman being robbed,
Copy !req
1820. and I tried to save her
just now.
Copy !req
1821. Yeah, this guy stole her baby
from her stroller, actually,
Copy !req
1822. and, uh...
Copy !req
1823. he said he was gonna eat it.
Copy !req
1824. - Oh.
- So I had to stop him.
Copy !req
1825. She was walking her baby
in the middle of the night?
Copy !req
1826. Yeah, I kind of thought that was
a bit strange, as well.
Copy !req
1827. That was very brave of you.
Copy !req
1828. Thanks.
Copy !req
1829. It's nice to meet you, Charlie.
Copy !req
1830. Uh, it's nice to meet you, Emma.
Copy !req