The Bodyguard 2 (2007)

1. 6:00 PM, BANGKOK

2. So this is what heaven feels like, right?

3. That's right.

4. Whoopsie!

5. Hey!

6. Say this together. So!

7. - So! - Cramped!

8. - Cramped! - Yeah, some of you get out!

9. You don't all need to go up there.

10. What a bunch of idiots.

11. Why must I be surrounded by idiots?

12. - Welcome. Please follow me. - There's still room inside.

13. To the left, not the right.

14. Here's your drink.

15. Do you want anything else?

16. Oh, what a lucky day! I haven't seen you in ages.

17. Have a seat, my friend.

18. Have a seat.

19. Tonight, we won't quit

20. until we're blitzed.

21. What? You look like you just got kicked in the face.

22. Like I said, kids these days,

23. they're disrespectful.

24. That one over there. See?

25. - Which one? - The guy who's babbling

26. and laughing. Make sure he's dead.

27. Here, take this.

28. How about you show me what I came for.

29. - Pipob, bring it in. - Right away, boss.

30. To be honest with you,

31. I wouldn't sell this stuff to anyone.

32. My God, this is amazing!

33. When the gangs from across the river asked me for it,

34. I just said no.

35. I don't see a damn thing.

36. Pipob, turn it on for him.

37. You know he doesn't have enough brain cells for this.

38. Sorry, brother.

39. Let me take care of this.

40. How's that? Get it?

41. No?

42. 'Course not.

43. I told you so.

44. You know how to shoot?

45. No sweat. Back in the day,

46. - I went shooting with my pop every day. - Alright then.

47. Keep an eye on that guy.

48. Get ready and wait for my signal. When I nod,

49. you pull the trigger.

50. Go get the money.

51. - I don't have it. - That's why I told you to go get it.

52. My God, how can you be this stupid?

53. Is this a revolver?

54. No. You're sure you know how to shoot?

55. Of course, trust me.

56. Pull the slide, aim, and shoot.

57. Why do I need to slide?

58. So it puts a bullet into the chamber.

59. Then switch off the safety. Okay?

60. Safety? What safety?

61. - You're sure you can shoot? - Of course.

62. I told you, I did it all the time.

63. - Okay. Wait here. - Okay.

64. What are you doing here?

65. Get out of here.

66. Everybody freeze. Stay right where you are.

67. - This isn't a good time for a prank. - What prank?

68. Who's pulling the prank on whom? You?

69. Just admit it, brother.

70. I'm such an honest man. If I weren't,

71. I'd be dead by now.

72. Oh shit!

73. - What? - Hey!

74. Kill him! Kill him!

75. Hey!

76. - How did you get down so fast? - I fell, you idiot!

77. That's my head, dumb-ass! You messed up my hairdo!

78. - No! - You have to save your own ass now.

79. Let's go this way!

80. Slide back and safety off.

81. Pull the trigger?

82. Sin!

83. - Yes? - What are you doing?

84. - Just sitting. - I can see that.

85. - Which way are they going? - That way.

86. Two shots.

87. Double the damage.

88. I won't lie to you...

89. Hurry!

90. You're hot? Let's get some air.

91. What kind of bird is that? The head looks so purple.

92. It's a purple-headed pigeon.

93. I've never heard of this species.

94. It's just migrated to Thailand.

95. It must have been a long journey. This poor thing lost its feathers.

96. Did it fly straight to a brick wall?

97. - The head looks battered. Shoo! - No!

98. This way.

99. Get out of here.

100. It's an honor to...

101. fight alongside you, boss.

102. Go!

103. I will give you a Medal of Honor

104. for your acts of valor.

105. - It's a basement floor, boss. - Why did you

106. bring me down here, you moron?

107. If I die, can I have a medal?

108. I'll shove it down your throat!

109. You die so I can survive!

110. - Didn't you hear the gunshots? Let's go! - Come on!

111. Hey, cover me.

112. - The rest of you follow me. - Yes, sir.

113. Shoot him!

114. What the actual fuck?

115. How could you even miss that?

116. Where did he go?

117. Dammit!

118. What are you doing? Who are you shooting at?

119. You got a gun?

120. I know this look. I know you want to take my bike.

121. There you go. Take it.

122. He's getting away. Follow him!

123. - Shit! - What?

124. You didn't even use your indicators.

125. I was about to make a turn. Why couldn't you slow down?

126. What is the biggest fish in the world?

127. Mekong catfish.

128. Wrong. A whale.

129. What animal can jump so high?

130. A motorcycle.

131. Damn, this bus always takes forever.

132. What was that noise?

133. They're probably filming.

134. They did this last week. I had to wait for hours.

135. They're filming car chase scenes, I'm sure.

136. Hey!

137. Hang in there.

138. An ambulance is coming.

139. Cut to the left.

140. Yahoo!

141. Ha-ha! I'm not dead!

142. I'm doing fine. See the smile on my face?

143. I'm too tough to die! Oh man, that was close.

144. This amulet protects me.

145. Let me show you this one. This one's better.

146. It's far, far better. Come with me.

147. It's right here. Just 300,000 baht.

148. Judging by your style and personality,

149. I guarantee that this car...

150. is just perfect for you.

151. Forty-eight easy installments.

152. Plus first-class insurance.

153. Hear the horn?

154. Sounds great, right? What? It startled you?

155. So what do you say? You're interested?

156. How about a test drive?

157. Alright then.

158. Let me get the key for you. I'll be right back.

159. Hold on, I'm pulling over.

160. Sure.

161. Come on, baby, don't be like that.

162. You know I miss you.

163. I always do.

164. Come on, don't say that. I had a bad dream last night.

165. I dreamed I lost my car.

166. Don't worry about it. It's just a dream.

167. Here's the key. Let's drive.

168. What's the rush? Take it easy. We have plenty of time.

169. This car is just perfect...

170. Hurry up, old hag.

171. Do you want to die? I've been driving for 20 years and never hit anyone.

172. I've been walking for 60 years

173. and never been hit by a car.

174. I'm invincible, asshole!

175. Oh my God, he has a gun!

176. You don't quit, do you?

177. Why do you have a gun?

178. Yeah! You missed!

179. What the hell? How can you drive like this?

180. I won't sell you this car. Let me go!

181. Hey, why are you so persistent?

182. I need a smoke.

183. Hey, have you ordered gas?

184. Go for it. We only live once.

185. Special agent. National Counterterrorism Agency

186. of Nongwaileum.

187. - What about the car? - Get it fixed.

188. OK.

189. Get up now. Get up.

190. And stop looking at me like that.

191. Slippery son of a bitch. Come on, keep moving.

192. NONGWAILEUM SECRET SERVICE

193. What is this all about?

194. Why am I being arrested?

195. With a face like this,

196. you really think I'm a bad guy?

197. This is the face of an angel.

198. I come from an upstanding family.

199. My father owns a jewelry shop.

200. My mother works for the National Bank.

201. My brother has an office in the Ministry of Commerce.

202. You're screwed! So screwed!

203. How many times have I told you?

204. I told you to think.

205. Think before you act.

206. Are you even capable of thinking?

207. I don't think so.

208. I told you...

209. Hey there.

210. Yes, I'm working.

211. Sure. See you at dinner. I promise. Six o'clock.

212. Alright. See you.

213. There's been collateral damage because of you.

214. How can you pay for that?

215. You think our agency can?

216. Is your dad a billionaire?

217. Do you think my dad's got money?

218. You...

219. Hi. Fish noodles?

220. I knew you'd like it.

221. I can drop by to order. Six o'clock, right?

222. What kind of noodles?

223. Thin noodles with lots of fish balls. Okay.

224. See you at six.

225. You're lucky the director doesn't know yet.

226. If our division gets closed down,

227. you tell me,

228. what are we going to do? We'll be out of jobs.

229. Can you tell me? Huh, can you?

230. I won't be home at six!

231. You can forget about your noodles!

232. Get out of here. Get out.

233. I have no prior record.

234. I won three Outstanding Citizen awards.

235. I'm gonna sue you. Yes, you. I'm gonna sue all of you.

236. I'll sue anyone who looks like you.

237. I'll sue everyone with your last name.

238. I'll sue you all, but I won't sue me.

239. I don't give a damn who you are.

240. Still want to sue us?

241. All of us?

242. Huh?

243. Oh, please.

244. Don't worry about my husband. I don't even know what to say.

245. He comes and goes as he pleases.

246. I haven't seen him for days.

247. He's just gone. I don't even know what he does for a living.

248. He never takes anything seriously.

249. He worked on a construction site for a while

250. and then quit after less than a month.

251. Then he tried selling insurance, selling detergent.

252. - Totally useless. - How much?

253. Two hundred.

254. Keep the change.

255. Right, because there isn't any change.

256. Are you nuts?

257. Yes, this style is very trendy.

258. It looks great on you.

259. Peekaboo! Guess who?

260. You think it's funny? Can't you see I'm working?

261. Where have you been?

262. Dirty clothes are all over the place. You'd better take care of them now.

263. - Want to test me? - Where's a washing bucket?

264. On my head, I guess.

265. Go!

266. Your backpack!

267. Put it away. It's not my job to clean up after you.

268. What a complete idiot!

269. So good at doing stupid things.

270. Why are you like this?

271. I'm just so done with him.

272. With a husband like this,

273. I'd be better off without him.

274. Whatever job you take on,

275. you have to do your best

276. and learn to compromise.

277. You have to try

278. to make things work. Okay?

279. And stop bouncing between jobs.

280. Otherwise, we'll never have enough savings.

281. Don't you want a house, a car?

282. Hey! Hey!

283. Remember what to do before bed?

284. Why do I have to repeat myself all the time?

285. Why can't you remember?

286. HAPPY WIFE, HAPPY LIFE MANTRA

287. How about this?

288. I'll take you to this place to ward off misfortunes.

289. It's in Thailand.

290. Very sacred.

291. The guru there is highly respectable.

292. You will be blessed with prosperity.

293. It will help you get a good job. Okay?

294. What about tonight?

295. It's been a couple of weeks.

296. Do you want to have some fun?

297. I can't. I'm tired.

298. Ugh!

299. Will I ever get laid?

300. You suck!

301. Your husband dumped you? Um...

302. So packed in there.

303. You have to get creative

304. to satisfy him, you know?

305. Come closer.

306. Put this sacred beeswax on your lips.

307. You'll see results within a couple of days. Boy!

308. Bring me some beeswax.

309. In less than a week,

310. your husband will crawl back to you.

311. Master, we're out of beeswax.

312. It's alright.

313. Bring me some holy feces.

314. It's feces from the holy horse.

315. We air-dried it, but someone left it in the rain.

316. You put it on your lips.

317. - What a nice smile you have. - Here, Master.

318. Give me your hand.

319. Chin up. Don't lower your head.

320. Oh wow!

321. There you go.

322. You got this.

323. He'll come back to you.

324. Isn't this full of crap?

325. What crap?

326. Don't you see? Everyone comes to see him.

327. Hello, Cheun.

328. - Hello, Master. - What brings you today?

329. I hope you can help my grandson.

330. Alright, bring him here.

331. Right.

332. What's wrong with his legs?

333. His legs are just lazy.

334. Lazy?

335. What? Lazy legs?

336. His legs don't work.

337. You're funny.

338. I take it you like the Cha-Cha-Cha gang.

339. You stay up late for them, huh?

340. Come here, son.

341. Come.

342. - Hello, Master. - Yeah, yeah.

343. Can you cure me?

344. - It looks quite bad. - Yeah.

345. But I think you should be fine.

346. At this point, they're already quite withered.

347. - Stay focused. - Yes.

348. - Yes. - Repeat after me.

349. So who's leading?

350. Who's following?

351. - You repeat after me. - Alright.

352. Okay. Get up now.

353. Try to walk.

354. Test your steps. Yeah, just like that. Good job.

355. Come back here. Sit down.

356. - Cheun, come here. - Yes?

357. Take him to see an orthopedist.

358. You can go now.

359. Grandpa, ouch!

360. - Namkhiao. - Hello!

361. Who is that?

362. - My husband. - Yeah?

363. Okay. Come over here.

364. - Right in front of me? - That hurts!

365. Don't you dare, sister. He's mine.

366. Come here.

367. - Your husband? - Yes, Master.

368. What happened to his face?

369. Why does he look smashed?

370. He's just born this way.

371. Let me get a closer look.

372. Hmm, let me see.

373. You have a nice structure, according to Chinese physiognomy.

374. He's a good catch, Khiao.

375. Good-looking fella. Where are you going? Come here.

376. Ooh, look at these brows!

377. These are a wealthy man's brows.

378. Both sides are perfect.

379. What? Why are you glaring so hard?

380. Blink your eyes. Yeah, just like that.

381. Now take a deep breath. Breath in, breath out.

382. That's right. Long and deep.

383. Look at his little mouth.

384. This is just perfect, my child.

385. Now concentrate

386. and pray with me.

387. Peekaboo!

388. You seem stressed.

389. I just want you to relax.

390. Let's try again.

391. By 3 p.m. tomorrow, you'll have an important job,

392. I hope you understand that

393. this is about our national security.

394. Alright.

395. We have to keep an eye on these two people,

396. This one is the biggest threat.

397. His name is Suchin.

398. And this one

399. is Surachai,

400. the lesser evil.

401. They're running an operation in Thailand

402. under the guise of a record label.

403. But behind the scenes,

404. are illegal activities.

405. They have quite a number of heavy weapons

406. that will be used to attack us.

407. I want someone who can bring them in.

408. We have to get them

409. before the KGB

410. or CIA can have a chance.

411. Is there anyone you think can take this mission?

412. I know a guy.

413. Are you deaf? Pick up the phone!

414. Utterly useless!

415. You can't do anything right.

416. She's just teasing me.

417. - I believe you. - Thank you for that.

418. Hello?

419. Yes.

420. Yes. Be right there.

421. Here, take it.

422. This is your chance now.

423. These guys are a threat to our nation.

424. How do you want me to infiltrate them?

425. That's your job.

426. - Why didn't you assign it to someone else? - That's my job.

427. What am I supposed to tell my wife?

428. That's your job.

429. - Your phone. - That's my call.

430. Of course! How can I forget?

431. You're dismissed.

432. I hope you don't screw this whole thing up.

433. That's my job.

434. You're going to be a French teacher?

435. You can't even speak your own language.

436. Do whatever you want. I don't care.

437. You keep showing up and disappearing. I mean, you don't care about me anyway.

438. You're here for food

439. and live to die.

440. Thinking to myself

441. This hurts me to the core

442. For I'm just a slave To your love who's asking

443. - For more - Go!

444. This wasn't a duet!

445. You ruined my song!

446. Here we go again.

447. All over again.

448. Mr. Thala,

449. in order to make music,

450. you need to have brains and talents.

451. Take 4S Studio as an example.

452. They're just a small label but they flourish.

453. Every song is a hit.

454. While my major label

455. is struggling to make one hit album.

456. Oh, come on,

457. you have to understand that making music these days

458. is like buying lottery tickets.

459. You can either win or lose.

460. I'm a businessman.

461. I'm not a gambler. I don't want to talk to you anymore.

462. Hey, Surachai, talk to him for me.

463. He's annoying me to death. He just never shuts up.

464. I'm this close to snapping your neck.

465. Mr. Thala,

466. do you know we're in a lot of trouble right now?

467. Out of the seven or eight albums you've produced,

468. none of them is remotely close to success.

469. To be honest,

470. I'd like to call you a fucking failure,

471. but I'm too nice for that.

472. So I just keep it to myself.

473. Hot coffee?

474. Didn't you notice if it's hot or not when you were making it?

475. Hey,

476. I'm going to give you three more months.

477. After that, if you want me to fire you

478. or if you want to walk away,

479. that's your choice.

480. But for now,

481. please get your nasty ass

482. off of my sofa.

483. Yes, it's me.

484. I'm so tired of this.

485. They don't even talk about my hit numbers.

486. Yeah. Forget about it.

487. I'll make them see that I'm the real deal.

488. Hey, I have to go now. Call you back later.

489. I suggest you take a dump.

490. What's this icky stuff?

491. Smells just like crap.

492. Mr. Thala, we have three artists coming in for auditions.

493. - Three? Okay. Let's do it. - Yes.

494. This way.

495. - Name? - Amnuay.

496. - Last name? - Huakahd.

497. - Amnuay Huakahd. - Yes.

498. - What are you singing? - "A Fool for Love"

499. - It's a song from "Hello Yasothon." - I know.

500. - Have you watched it? - Three times.

501. You have that much free time?

502. Shut up.

503. That's none of your business. Go ahead.

504. When a bird leaves its nest

505. It sings cuckoo to say goodbye

506. But you, my love

507. You never sing to me

508. Before you leave for the big city

509. My love, will you Leave me without a goodbye?

510. Unlike a crow

511. Who fares me well with a cuckoo...

512. Cuckoo...

513. That's enough.

514. You can leave now.

515. What kind of crow sings cuckoo?

516. But I haven't reached the chorus yet.

517. I hated it from the "cuckoos." So, cuckoo to you, bye.

518. - Next. - Your turn.

519. Hello.

520. - Name? - It's Sai.

521. - What song? - "Tears of Warin Girl."

522. - By Jintara Poonlap? - Yes.

523. Go on.

524. This Warin girl is drowning

525. in her own tears

526. Her boy from Ubon is not here

527. To join her on the candle parade

528. He's gone for good

529. To be with a girl from Sakon Nakhon

530. She is left hanging there

531. Waiting alone by the candles

532. The rainy season has become so lonely

533. - Do you know the bus station? - Why?

534. To find a bus back to Warin.

535. And take that

536. cuckoo guy with you. Just get together, okay?

537. Hello.

538. - That's my bag. - Yeah, I know.

539. - Name? - Kamlao.

540. - You sing? - Beautifully, in fact.

541. My friends call me Elvis.

542. - You dance? - Oh, I'm the best.

543. My friends call me Michael.

544. - Okay. - That's what you call a face of an artist?

545. Mr. Thala,

546. where did you find him?

547. You flushed him out of a sewer or smoked him out of a grove

548. before you caught him?

549. My, oh my!

550. Mr. Thala, please ask him for me.

551. Is that a face or a water bucket?

552. With such insults he just said about your artist,

553. how can you still sit here?

554. Get out. Do whatever you have to do.

555. I don't think you're going to last very long.

556. His face just makes me feel sick for some reason.

557. Leave now. We have things to discuss.

558. Hey, La, my man!

559. Hey, Tik!

560. When will you get out of the woods?

561. And do what exactly?

562. I don't want to deal with those capitalist assholes like you do.

563. - That's Kamlao. - Kamlao?

564. - Hi. - Hi!

565. My new guy.

566. Your new guy?

567. You signed a comedian now?

568. - He's a singer. - A singer?

569. - What do you think? - Hmm...

570. I'm not sure about his face.

571. I think a mushroom has more charisma than him.

572. Good physique though.

573. - How many fights have you won? - Not a boxer.

574. He's a singer.

575. Let me see.

576. Yeah, he's alright.

577. - Your face has a great cemetery. - Symmetry.

578. You want to be a singer? Do as I say, you'll be a star.

579. Show me your smile.

580. - Heh-heh. - Heh-heh.

581. Yeah, we're screwed.

582. - So what do you want me to do? - How about this?

583. You teach him some dance moves.

584. You sure?

585. Positive. One hundred percent sure.

586. - Starting now? - Yes.

587. - Right now. Hey, Kamsao! - At this moment.

588. - It's Kamlao. - Right, Kamlao. Come here.

589. - Ngiam. - It's Kamlao.

590. Kamlao, are you familiar with dancing?

591. - Just a little. - Yeah? Do you know the basics?

592. - What basics? - Basic dance moves, do you know some?

593. - No, not at all. - Do you know blowing technique?

594. - Yeah. - Show me.

595. You have to practice hard, Kamlao.

596. - Understand? - Yes.

597. - I'm sure you'll make it big. - Yes.

598. - I'll have thin noodles with soup. - Okay.

599. - Two bowls of thin noodles. - Sure.

600. Is there a toilet around here?

601. - Toilet? - You're that hungry?

602. - I'm taking a leak. - No.

603. There's just a wall over there.

604. - Feel free to pee. - Okay.

605. Hey!

606. Hey!

607. DOG'S PISS

608. That's Thala.

609. Hey there, Thala.

610. - You're doing well? - Not quite.

611. Of course not because I'm here.

612. How many matches has your team lost?

613. - Three. - Three matches, three payments.

614. - Pay me now. - I can't, I'm broke.

615. - Yeah? - Where's my elephant?

616. What elephant? Wrong movie. Get out of here.

617. Go home!

618. - You think you can get away with this? - No.

619. Do you know me, Wee Bangkruay?

620. Where's my elephant?

621. What? I don't give a shit about your goddamn elephant.

622. Sweet rambutans, sweet longans.

623. - What can I help you with? - Do you have mangosteens?

624. They just bought all of them. There are longans and rambutans.

625. Indian plums, please.

626. - Are you messing with me? - Okay, I'll take some longans.

627. - How many? - One kilo.

628. - Sixty. You want a bag? - No.

629. That's okay.

630. - Can I leave now? - Yes.

631. - You're not mad, right? - I'm not.

632. That was a close one.

633. Oh, no! My stall!

634. Please stop. I'm begging you.

635. Stop now, please. Don't do it.

636. Where's my elephant?

637. His elephant is in our truck.

638. Why did you take it in the first place?

639. What a horrible day!

640. Eat longans to support our nation!

641. What's the matter with him?

642. What happened?

643. This is just a warning.

644. Don't let me see you again. Kamlao, let's go.

645. Hey! I remember you!

646. It's you! You bring bad luck!

647. Wait!

648. Another man's wife

649. Got me giddy with delight

650. Now I want to make my wife's face

651. Anew

652. Because she's no longer beautiful to me

653. My bad, I have an old hag for a wife

654. Oh, poor me

655. I'm too excited about another man's wife

656. But when I turn to my side

657. Good!

658. Especially during her pregnancy

659. Her look alone makes my life a misery

660. Oh, it's killing me

661. It's killing me

662. My old hag of a wife

663. Someday I will make your face new

664. For sure

665. I can find beauty in her when I'm drunk

666. Before she haunts me again When my sobriety comes

667. I'd kill her someday But I'm afraid of prison

668. Another man's wife Got me giddy with delight

669. Now I want to make my wife's face anew

670. Over and over

671. I'm too excited about another man's wife But turning to my side

672. Makes me lose my mind

673. No man has a wife like mine

674. I can't believe it, you guys.

675. He's just knocked Bodyslam

676. out of the top spot. Even Film Rattapoom doesn't stand a chance.

677. This new artist has just released his debut album,

678. Mummy Lao: Box-head man. Grab it while you can.

679. Because right now they're selling out so fast.

680. Listen to the music. There're great tunes. I have to say this because some people

681. used my CDs as a reflector on elephants' tails

682. to prevent other cars from hitting their elephants,

683. You know, making it blink.

684. - Hello. - Hello.

685. Your debut album is doing so great. How do you feel about that?

686. It's amazing.

687. Your face is amazing.

688. My heart's pounding so hard right now.

689. What about your music style? Can you tell us about it?

690. It's fun, it's catchy...

691. - Can I get your... - Let's talk about your look.

692. It's just so iconic.

693. What's your inspiration? What's the theme?

694. Mr. Thala takes care of everything specially, just for you.

695. Oh, okay.

696. PLATINUM ALBUM

697. How do feel about the success of your debut album

698. that just went platinum recently?

699. At first, I didn't expect it to blow up this much.

700. I think it's my determination

701. and the right mentors who didn't...

702. - A diamond in the rough. - ... give up on me.

703. - A hidden gem. - Especially

704. the one who makes me the man I am today, Mr. Thala.

705. - Here you go. - I have to say that the first time we met,

706. I could sense that

707. he's just different.

708. I really believed that

709. - he had potentials... - The sky's the limit.

710. - to make groundbreaking music. - A maggot can turn into a fly.

711. even though I'd never seen him sing or dance,

712. like, not a single step. When we met, I just knew it.

713. Thank you so much. Thank you. Take care, bye.

714. Hey, Paula!

715. Congratulations! Who would have thought, right?

716. Well, I certainly wouldn't.

717. If I'd known, I would've done it in a heartbeat.

718. I have to go. See you around.

719. - Paula. - Yes?

720. Let me buy you dinner sometime.

721. - We can do that? - Of course.

722. When?

723. When you're not menstruating.

724. So, it's not today.

725. Don't forget to buy some tampons.

726. Sister, don't listen to them.

727. That's just the way it is. Everybody says she's his mistress.

728. - Really? - That's right.

729. Look at that, Mom.

730. This singer is super popular in Thailand.

731. - He's like the biggest star right now. - Who?

732. Another man's wife Got me giddy with delight

733. Now I want to make

734. My wife's face anew

735. - She's no longer beautiful - You piece of shit!

736. - Stay still, babies. - Your kids?

737. Their father was an alcoholic who left us.

738. He never helped me take care of the kids.

739. - That's why I'm a single mom. - Go play over there.

740. Come on.

741. Go play with your brother. He's over there.

742. Go!

743. It's been a while since I ate a kid's liver.

744. Do you want to eat my foot too?

745. Oh...

746. Let me go. Let me go.

747. Take it. Take it.

748. Take it! In the face!

749. Left hook! Right hook!

750. Didn't feel a thing.

751. Lower your guns, idiots.

752. Ouch!

753. Don't you remember what he looked like?

754. I almost got him and then bam!

755. - Lightning? - His kick, sir.

756. I found him.

757. - Zoom in. - Okay.

758. Mummy Lao!

759. Whoever

760. dares to mess with devils like us,

761. he's a dead man.

762. I hope I've made it clear for you, gentlemen.

763. If you screw this up,

764. don't ever show your face again.

765. Understand?

766. You won't see us again.

767. Good.

768. So...

769. get out of my office now.

770. It's Mum...

771. - Mummy Lao, sir. - Okay.

772. I'm asking you one more time.

773. Where did this guy

774. come from, exactly?

775. He walked into my office for an audition,

776. so I took him to meet you.

777. - It's just the luck of the draw. - Surachai,

778. let's go home.

779. I don't want to waste my time with this loser.

780. Here you are!

781. Sorry, I'm late.

782. Not a problem. I asked you out,

783. I don't mind waiting.

784. Did you bring your butt?

785. - If so, take a seat. - Thanks.

786. You want a drink? Or maybe a little accident?

787. I don't think so. I'm a lucky guy. I don't want to jinx it.

788. You look so beautiful tonight.

789. Yeah. I hear that a lot.

790. At first, I wasn't sure how to take it, but now

791. I know that I'm beautiful, so I don't mind it.

792. Oh, is that it?

793. You're so full of fun.

794. And full of shit too.

795. You're very funny. Are you a comedian?

796. Just kidding.

797. - You come here often? - Every once in a while.

798. I'm having a good time here.

799. Join me on the dance floor?

800. This is so much fun. Let's do it again.

801. What were you doing in the basement?

802. Confused?

803. CIA.

804. C-I-A.

805. I've been trying to catch them for ages.

806. Sorry I squeezed you too hard.

807. - It looked painful. - Yeah.

808. It's okay. We're here.

809. - Where is this? - Your place. Give me the key.

810. Okay.

811. Give me the key.

812. Oh...

813. - You don't even get in the right hole. - Yeah.

814. Why? Is it too small?

815. I have no problem getting into a smaller one.

816. Ha-ha!

817. - Nice apartment. - Beautiful owner,

818. - beautiful apartment. - Oh.

819. Is that it?

820. For you...

821. Aah...

822. Milky skin.

823. Curvaceous figure.

824. Full of sensuality.

825. Nope. I'm a family man.

826. I just want to see my husband! Let me see my husband!

827. - I know he's up there! - Sorry, you're not allowed.

828. That's my husband. That's my Kamlao.

829. No, no, no. That's Mummy Lao.

830. Yes, that's the same person!

831. Ooh, is that Sek Loso? Hello, Sek Loso!

832. Help me, Sek! Help me!

833. Asshole! Why don't you help me?

834. Yes, sir.

835. She's making quite a scene. Yes.

836. Dammit!

837. Oh hey, Aed!

838. Thiery! Lek!

839. Eed! Hello, Eed!

840. Aed, please get me up there.

841. We'd just get thrown out too.

842. Hello!

843. Are you having a good time?

844. Yeah, until you showed up.

845. You may be married but I still love you

846. With my unhealed and broken heart

847. I will wait for the day that he dies

848. Shamelessly, I'm confessing to you

849. The day of your marriage

850. As your groom's procession is moving past

851. Along the street

852. Did you hear my tortured heart

853. Ripped out and shredded to pieces

854. I lost my mind, I could eat a car.

855. My sanity left me for seven days

856. I dreamed of destroying every woman

857. Then again

858. Where was the fun

859. When I ended up in prison?

860. - There's a sniper on the crane. - I still love you

861. With my unhealed and broken heart

862. I will wait for you

863. For the day that he dies

864. Shamelessly, I'm confessing to you

865. Ugh, this damn fly. I'm not made of shit.

866. My sanity...

867. My soul needs to be...

868. Cleansed

869. - Hi, guys! - Hi, brother.

870. - Is it your turn? - If it was, we'd be on stage.

871. Right. I should get going.

872. Then go!

873. I don't have a fix so don't get me riled up.

874. - How's everything? - All clear, sir.

875. - Don't let anyone get in the way. - Yes, sir.

876. - Gotcha. - See? Why didn't you listen?

877. Oh, you poor thing.

878. You know you can't win because you're too stupid.

879. Learn from him. He made a smart move.

880. You look dumb, you play dumb. You're probably dumber than my husband.

881. What now? You think too much.

882. Don't move this. Why do I have to repeat myself?

883. Look at that!

884. How did she get here?

885. - Watch him play. Kamlao! - Don't move!

886. What's going on? Why did they take me?

887. What have you done? Did you kill someone?

888. Or did you double cross anyone?

889. Shut up if you want to live.

890. - Is that so? - Yes. Let's go. Follow me.

891. - Where to? - Anywhere but here.

892. Hey!

893. Hey, where did they go?

894. Good job, Mummy Lao.

895. Unfortunately, I don't have time for your games.

896. Kill him.

897. Everybody, put down your weapons!

898. Put them down!

899. Paula,

900. are you working with him?

901. I work for nobody.

902. I'm my own boss.

903. So who exactly is her boss?

904. I don't know, jackass.

905. My dear secretary, put down your weapon.

906. No way.

907. Paula, you're on the higher ground.

908. We're obviously at a disadvantage.

909. - Put down your weapon. - What?

910. No way.

911. I'm counting to three!

912. Who the hell is this?

913. Is he Japanese? Maybe he's sleepy? Oh finally, he's awake now.

914. What a complete idiot. Now, feel the burn.

915. Water!

916. Right on, baby!

917. Oops!

918. My husband is so amazing!

919. - Let's go. - Wait.

920. Let's find a place for a quickie.

921. You horny mess!

922. BEWARE FLAMMABLE MATERIAL

923. - Get out of here. - We go together.

924. Do you want to die?

925. You're a wicked husband!

926. - I'm such a badass, right? - Yes.

927. You're the best, honey. Let's go!

928. - Khiao. - Yes?

929. - Run. - No.

930. If we have to die, we'll die together.

931. We sure will. Step over there.

932. A little more.

933. More.

934. - Get ready. - Okay.

935. Get out.

936. Let's go to the dancefloor

937. You don't have to wait anymore

938. Shake your hips, show your steps

939. - What? - Enough with the moves!

940. You don't have to act cool 'cause we're all going to die.

941. Great! You just killed our own men.

942. Now run!

943. Can they stop? My legs are killing me.

944. Stop!

945. I have a gun.

946. - But I don't. - Idiot!

947. I just said I have.

948. Back off!

949. Or he's dead.

950. Yeah.

951. Don't get any closer,

952. he'll kill me.

953. - Back off! - I don't buy it.

954. You don't?

955. Surachai, you're mad at me? Why did you shoot me for real?

956. What? I'm not mad at you, silly.

957. Stay away! Don't come closer!

958. - Let's go. - Okay.

959. Stay away!

960. Ouch! My dick!

961. Holy shit!

962. We almost died.

963. I feel like a water lizard coming up for air.

964. Are we going to make it?

965. What?

966. Surachai.

967. It's over now.

968. Haven't I told you

969. to get a train ready for us?

970. What kind of train runs under water?

971. Ridiculous.

972. Help...

973. Ass...

974. You shouldn't have come.

975. Paula.

976. These two

977. belong to my government.

978. What? Are you crazy?

979. We've been on this case for years.

980. But you just want to take the credit?

981. Hello?

982. Yes, honey. Noodles with no fish balls.

983. Yes. Chicken rice too?

984. I got it. Don't worry.

985. With entrails? And lots of skins? Yes, sure.

986. Look over there. Yes, noodles too.

987. Don't worry about it.

988. I'll get them all for you. And hot soup too. Okay.

989. Take them away.

990. We finally got them.

991. Boohoo!

992. You son of a bitch! You ugly asshole!

993. Where are you? I love you

994. but you're trying to kill me!

995. You'll get yours!

996. Karma's a bitch, you know that?

997. When you got shot, I tried to save you.

998. I knew it since I heard you sing:

999. Another man's wife Got me giddy with delight

1000. Now I want to make my wife's face anew

1001. I knew it! You're a horrible, unfaithful husband.

1002. What are you looking at?

1003. Good evening, ladies and gentlemen.

1004. Thank you for coming here tonight.

1005. Tonight,

1006. we honor a brave individual

1007. who deserves to be respected and recognized.

1008. Our military decided to do something

1009. to celebrate them.

1010. His bravery

1011. earns our highest decoration.

1012. We're honored to pay tribute

1013. to him and his family.

1014. Please welcome Captain Kamlao

1015. Makplearn.

1016. This is your new mission.

1017. The person in this file is very important to our nation.

1018. Take good care of him. Protect him with your life.

1019. Don't let anything happen to him.

1020. Ready!

1021. And action!

1022. I won't take it.

1023. Go away. I'm not signing.

1024. Mum! You little shit!

1025. You played me again.

1026. You played me again, didn't you?

1027. You tricked me in two of your movies now.

1028. I got zero dialogue in the first film. Fine!

1029. But I still got nothing in this one.

1030. And you killed me off?

1031. You hired me just to kill me off? Really?

1032. What do you think you're doing?

1033. Asshole! You shot me three times when I was about to talk.

1034. Three shots! I was dead from the first shot.

1035. You killed me off then shove your foot on my face.

1036. You think you're so funny?

1037. Why don't you get ready?

1038. Stop chewing betels like a grandma.

1039. They'll make fun of you. Let's go.

1040. You're lucky you're my mom's friend.

1041. She told me not to leave you. Don't look at me.

1042. I almost always got the leading roles.

1043. Do you know "Pattaya Maniac," do you?

1044. "Pattaya Maniac" by Yuthlert Sippapak. He gave me the leading role.

1045. Somchai Kemglad only got a supporting character. Think about that.

1046. Poj Arnon gave me the leading role.

1047. I was the main character in Workpoint's "Teng Nong" trilogy.

1048. I've had enough of your bullshit.

1049. I won't work with Sahamongkol ever again.

1050. I won't work with you anymore I'll only work with Workpoint.

1051. To hell with you and your fucked up schedule.

1052. You told me 5 a.m. I came here with my family.

1053. But you filmed me at 3 p.m.

1054. What are you filming? I'm gonna break your camera.

1055. Look at you. You have no regrets.

1056. I'm not just a comedian.

1057. I'm a superstar.

1058. What are you looking at?

1059. Do you know who I am?

1060. People across the entire country love me.

1061. I have plenty of fans.

1062. Just remember, I won't work with you in your movies anymore.

1063. Call me a loser, if I don't keep my word.

1064. - Let's go. You don't want to do that. - Just...

1065. He's a boxer. Somrak Kamsing's pupil.

1066. Don't do it, son.

1067. Beating him is like beating a vagrant dog.

1068. Your blood won't be on our hands but your wife's hands.

1069. She'll be the one to stab you.

1070. Do you want me to spill the truth about Nakhon Sawan?

1071. About what happened in that room?

1072. I knocked on your door for hours,

1073. but you're too occupied to open it. Get in the car.

1074. You signed me up to kill me off.

1075. You got funny lines for Teng but none for me?

1076. Teng's not that funny, but you gave him that guru role.

1077. That's a good laugh.

1078. But me? I got out of the water and died.

1079. Do you think the audience will find that funny?

1080. They'll wait for me to shine.

1081. They'll wait for my jokes.

1082. You call your boss now.

1083. Call your boss, Somsak. Get him on the phone with me.

1084. Get in the car.

1085. Don't call me ever again.

1086. I won't take a role in your movies.

1087. I know people in Workpoint.

1088. Panya Nirunkul is my guy.

1089. Dipshit! Asshole! Ugly son of a gun!

1090. Fuck you and you!

1091. Let's go, son.

1092. Ignore him.

1093. - Mum! - That's enough.

1094. Mum, you piece of shit!

1095. - Cut! - Clap the slate.