1. Way out West
there was this fella.Copy !req
2. Fella I wanna tell you about.Copy !req
3. Fella by the name of Jeff Lebowski.Copy !req
4. Least that was the handle that
his loving parents gave him.Copy !req
5. But he never had much use for it himself.Copy !req
6. This Lebowski, he called himself the Dude.Copy !req
7. Now Dude,Copy !req
8. that's a name no one would
self-apply where I come from.Copy !req
9. But then there was a lot about the Dude that
didn't make a whole lot of sense to me,Copy !req
10. and a lot about where he lived likewise.Copy !req
11. Drifting along with the
tumbling tumbleweedsCopy !req
12. But then again,Copy !req
13. maybe that's why I found the
place so darned interesting.Copy !req
14. I know when night has goneCopy !req
15. That a new world's born at dawnCopy !req
16. They call Los
Angeles the City of Angels.Copy !req
17. I didn't find it to be that, exactly.Copy !req
18. But I'll allow there are
some nice folks there.Copy !req
19. Course, I can't say I seen London,Copy !req
20. and I never been to France,Copy !req
21. and I ain't never seen no queen in her
damned undies, as the fella says.Copy !req
22. But I'll tell you what,Copy !req
23. after seeing Los Angeles and this
here story I'm about to unfold,Copy !req
24. well, I guess I've seen somethingCopy !req
25. every bit as stupefying as you can
see in any of those other places,Copy !req
26. and in English, too.Copy !req
27. So I can die with a smile on my faceCopy !req
28. without feeling like the
good Lord gypped me.Copy !req
29. Now, this here story I'm about to unfoldCopy !req
30. took place back in the early '90s,Copy !req
31. just about the time of our conflict
with Saddam and the Iraqis.Copy !req
32. I only mention it 'cause
sometimes there's a man...Copy !req
33. I won't say a hero.Copy !req
34. 'Cause what's a hero?Copy !req
35. But sometimes there's a man...Copy !req
36. And I'm talking about the Dude here.Copy !req
37. Sometimes there's a man...Copy !req
38. Well, he's the man for his time and place.Copy !req
39. He fits right in there.Copy !req
40. And that's the Dude in Los Angeles.Copy !req
41. And even if he is a lazy man,Copy !req
42. and the Dude was most certainly that,Copy !req
43. quite possibly the laziest
in Los Angeles county,Copy !req
44. which would place him high in the
running for laziest worldwide.Copy !req
45. But sometimes there's a man...Copy !req
46. Sometimes there's a man...Copy !req
47. Well, I lost my train of thought here.Copy !req
48. But...Copy !req
49. Hell, I done introduced him enough.Copy !req
50. with them all
for a collective action.Copy !req
51. This will not stand.Copy !req
52. This will not stand, this
aggression against Kuwait.Copy !req
53. Here on the range I belongCopy !req
54. Drifting alongCopy !req
55. With the tumblingCopy !req
56. TumbleweedsCopy !req
57. Where's the money, Lebowski?Copy !req
58. I want that money, Lebowski.Copy !req
59. Bunny says you're good for it.Copy !req
60. Where's the money, Lebowski?Copy !req
61. Where's the fucking money, shithead?Copy !req
62. it's down there somewhere.
Let me take another look.Copy !req
63. Don't fuck with us.Copy !req
64. Your wife owes money to Jackie Treehorn,Copy !req
65. that means you owe money
to Jackie Treehorn.Copy !req
66. Ever thus to deadbeats, Lebowski.Copy !req
67. No, don't do...Copy !req
68. Not on the rug, man. See?Copy !req
69. See what happens, Lebowski?
You see what happens?Copy !req
70. Nobody calls me Lebowski.
You got the wrong guy.Copy !req
71. I'm the Dude, man.Copy !req
72. Your name's Lebowski, Lebowski.Copy !req
73. Your wife is Bunny.Copy !req
74. My wife? Bunny?Copy !req
75. Do you see a wedding ring on my finger?Copy !req
76. Does this place look like
I'm fucking married?Copy !req
77. The toilet seat's up, man!Copy !req
78. What the fuck is this?Copy !req
79. Obviously you're not a golfer.Copy !req
80. Woo? Yeah.Copy !req
81. Isn't this guy supposed
to be a millionaire?Copy !req
82. Fuck.Copy !req
83. Yeah. What do you think?Copy !req
84. He looks like a fucking loser.Copy !req
85. Hey, at least I'm housebroken.Copy !req
86. Fucking time-waster.Copy !req
87. Thanks a lot, asshole.Copy !req
88. La-la-la, la-la-la, la-la-laCopy !req
89. La-la-la, la, la, la, laCopy !req
90. La-la-la, la, la, la-la la-laCopy !req
91. La, la, la-laCopy !req
92. La-la-laCopy !req
93. La-la-la, la-la-laCopy !req
94. La-la, la-laCopy !req
95. The man in me will doCopy !req
96. Nearly any taskCopy !req
97. And as for compensationCopy !req
98. There's little he would askCopy !req
99. Take a woman like youCopy !req
100. To get throughCopy !req
101. To the man in meCopy !req
102. Storm clouds are ragingCopy !req
103. All around my doorCopy !req
104. I think to myselfCopy !req
105. I might not take it anymoreCopy !req
106. Take a woman like your kindCopy !req
107. To find the man in meCopy !req
108. But, ohCopy !req
109. What a wonderful feelingCopy !req
110. Just to know that you are nearCopy !req
111. Sets my heart a-reelingCopy !req
112. From my toesCopy !req
113. Up to my earsCopy !req
114. The man in me will hide sometimesCopy !req
115. To keep from being seenCopy !req
116. But that's just because he doesn't wantCopy !req
117. To turn into some machineCopy !req
118. Take a woman like youCopy !req
119. To get throughCopy !req
120. To the man in meCopy !req
121. I'm throwing rocks tonight. Mark it, Dude.Copy !req
122. I'm telling you, this
was a valued rug. This was a...Copy !req
123. Yeah, man. It really
tied the room together.Copy !req
124. This was a valued...Copy !req
125. What tied the room together, Dude? My rug.Copy !req
126. Were you listening to the
Dude's story, Donny?Copy !req
127. What? Walter.Copy !req
128. Were you listening to the Dude's story?
I was bowling.Copy !req
129. So you have no frame of
reference here, Donny.Copy !req
130. You're like a child who wanders into the
middle of a movie and wants to know...Copy !req
131. Walter, what's the point, man? There's
no reason, here's my point, Dude.Copy !req
132. There's no fucking reason why these two...Copy !req
133. Yeah, Walter, what's your point?Copy !req
134. Walter, what is the...Copy !req
135. Look, we all know who is at fault here.Copy !req
136. What the fuck are you talking about? Huh?Copy !req
137. No, what the fuck are you... I'm not...Copy !req
138. We're talking about unchecked
aggression here, Dude.Copy !req
139. What the fuck is he talking about? My rug.Copy !req
140. Forget it, Donny! You're
out of your element!Copy !req
141. Walter, the Chinaman who peed on my rug,Copy !req
142. I can't go give him a bill!Copy !req
143. So what the fuck are you talking about?Copy !req
144. What the fuck are you talking about?Copy !req
145. The Chinaman is not the issue here, Dude!Copy !req
146. I'm talking about drawing
a line in the sand, Dude.Copy !req
147. Across this line you do not...Copy !req
148. Also, Dude, "Chinaman" is not
the preferred nomenclature.Copy !req
149. Asian-American, please.Copy !req
150. Walter, this isn't a guy who built the
rail roads here. This is a guy...Copy !req
151. What the fuck are you...Copy !req
152. Walter, he peed on my rug!
He peed on the Dude's rug.Copy !req
153. Donny, you're out of your element.Copy !req
154. Dude, the Chinaman is not the issue here.Copy !req
155. So, who... Jeff Lebowski.Copy !req
156. The other Jeffrey Lebowski.
The millionaire.Copy !req
157. That's fucking interesting, man.
That's fucking interesting.Copy !req
158. Plus, he has the wealth,
obviously, and the resources,Copy !req
159. so that there's no reason,
there's no fucking reasonCopy !req
160. why his wife should go out
and owe money all over town,Copy !req
161. and then they come and they
pee on your fucking rug!Copy !req
162. Am I wrong? No.Copy !req
163. Am I wrong? Yeah, but...Copy !req
164. Okay then.Copy !req
165. That rug really tied the
room together, did it not?Copy !req
166. Fucking A. And this guy peed on it.Copy !req
167. Donny, please.Copy !req
168. You know, this is the fucking guy...Copy !req
169. I could find this fucking Lebowski guy.Copy !req
170. His name is Lebowski?
That's your name, Dude.Copy !req
171. This is the guy who should
compensate me for the fucking rug.Copy !req
172. His wife goes out and owes money all
over town, and they pee on my rug?Copy !req
173. They pee on your fucking rug?Copy !req
174. Peed on my fucking rug. That's right, Dude.Copy !req
175. They peed on your fucking rug.Copy !req
176. This is the study.Copy !req
177. As you can see, the various
commendations, awards...Copy !req
178. "Jeffrey Lebowski." ... citations,
honorary degrees, et cetera.Copy !req
179. Very impressive. Oh, please
feel free to inspect them.Copy !req
180. Oh. No, I'm not really...
Oh, please. Please.Copy !req
181. That is the key to the city of Pasadena,Copy !req
182. which Mr. Lebowski received two years ago
in recognition of his various civic...Copy !req
183. Oh! That's the Los Angeles Chamber
of Commerce Business Achiever Award,Copy !req
184. which is given... Oh, not
necessarily given every year.Copy !req
185. Hey, is this...Copy !req
186. Given only when there's
a worthy somebody...Copy !req
187. Is this him with Nancy?Copy !req
188. Yes, indeed, that is Mr. Lebowski
with the first lady, yes.Copy !req
189. It was taken when Mrs. Reagan...Copy !req
190. That's Lebowski on the left there?Copy !req
191. Of course. Mr. Lebowski, on the left...
So he's a...Copy !req
192. You know, a handicapped kind of guy?Copy !req
193. Mr. Lebowski is disabled, yes.Copy !req
194. This picture was taken when Mrs. Reagan
was first lady of the nation.Copy !req
195. Yes, yes.Copy !req
196. Not of California. Good shot.Copy !req
197. In fact, he met privately
with the President,Copy !req
198. though, unfortunately, there wasn't
enough time for a photo opportunity.Copy !req
199. Oh, Nancy's pretty good.
Oh, wonderful woman.Copy !req
200. We were very happy to... These are...Copy !req
201. Oh, those are Mr. Lebowski's
children, so to speak.Copy !req
202. Different mothers, huh?Copy !req
203. No, they're not... Racially,
he's pretty cool?Copy !req
204. They're not literally his children.Copy !req
205. They're the Little
Lebowski Urban Achievers,Copy !req
206. inner city children of promise, but
without the necessary means for...Copy !req
207. Necessary means for a higher education,Copy !req
208. so Mr. Lebowski is committed to
sending all of them to college.Copy !req
209. Excuse me. Oh, geez.Copy !req
210. Thank you. Thank you.Copy !req
211. Far out. Think he's got room
for one more? One... Oh.Copy !req
212. You never went to college.Copy !req
213. Please, don't touch that. Oh, yeah, yeah.
No, I did,Copy !req
214. but, you know, I spent most of my timeCopy !req
215. occupying various administration buildings,Copy !req
216. smoking a lot of Thai stick,Copy !req
217. breaking into
the ROTC and bowling.Copy !req
218. Tell you the truth, Brandt, I
don't remember most of it.Copy !req
219. Okay, sir. You're a
Lebowski, I'm a Lebowski.Copy !req
220. That's terrific.Copy !req
221. But I am very busy, as I imagine you are.Copy !req
222. What can I do for you, sir?Copy !req
223. Well, sir, it's this rug I have.Copy !req
224. It really tied the room together.Copy !req
225. You told Brandt on the phone. He told me.Copy !req
226. Where do I fit in?Copy !req
227. Well, they were looking
for you, these two guys.Copy !req
228. You know, they... I'll say it again.Copy !req
229. You told Brandt on the phone. He told me.Copy !req
230. I know what happened. Yes, yes.Copy !req
231. Oh, so you know that they were
trying to piss on your rug.Copy !req
232. Did I urinate on your rug?Copy !req
233. You mean, did you personally
come and pee on my rug?Copy !req
234. Hello! Do you speak English, sir?Copy !req
235. ¿Parla usted inglés?Copy !req
236. I'll ask you again. Did
I urinate on your rug?Copy !req
237. No. Like I said, Woo peed on my rug.Copy !req
238. I just want to understand this, sir.Copy !req
239. Every time a rug is micturated
upon in this fair city,Copy !req
240. I have to compensate the person?Copy !req
241. Come on, man. I'm not trying
to scam anybody here.Copy !req
242. You know, I'm just...Copy !req
243. You're just looking for a
handout like every other...Copy !req
244. Are you employed, Mr. Lebowski?Copy !req
245. Wait. Let me explain something to you.Copy !req
246. I am not Mr. Lebowski.Copy !req
247. You're Mr. Lebowski. I'm the Dude.Copy !req
248. So that's what you call me. You know?Copy !req
249. That or His Dudeness,Copy !req
250. or Duder or, you know,Copy !req
251. El Duderino, if you're not
into the whole brevity thing.Copy !req
252. Are you employed, sir?Copy !req
253. Employed?Copy !req
254. You don't go out looking for a job
dressed like that, do you? On a weekday?Copy !req
255. Is this a...Copy !req
256. What day is this? Well, I do work, sir.Copy !req
257. So, if you don't mind... No, I do mind.
The Dude minds.Copy !req
258. This will not stand, you know.Copy !req
259. This aggression will not stand, man.Copy !req
260. I mean, your wife owes money...Copy !req
261. My wife is not the issue here!Copy !req
262. I hope that someday my wife will
learn to live on her allowance,Copy !req
263. which is ample.Copy !req
264. But if she does not, that
is her problem, not mine,Copy !req
265. just as the rug is your problem.Copy !req
266. Just as every bum's lot in life
is his own responsibility,Copy !req
267. regardless of who he chooses to blame.Copy !req
268. I didn't blame anyone for
the loss of my legs.Copy !req
269. Some Chinaman took them from me in Korea.Copy !req
270. But I went out and achieved anyway.Copy !req
271. I cannot solve your problems, sir.
Only you can.Copy !req
272. Well, fuck it. Oh, fuck it.Copy !req
273. Yes, that's your answer. That's
your answer to everything.Copy !req
274. Tattoo it on your forehead!Copy !req
275. Your revolution is over, Mr. Lebowski!Copy !req
276. Condolences! The bums lost!Copy !req
277. My advice to you is to do
what your parents did!Copy !req
278. Get a job, sir!Copy !req
279. The bums will always lose!Copy !req
280. Do you hear me, Lebowski?Copy !req
281. The bums will always lose.Copy !req
282. How was your meeting, Mr. Lebowski?Copy !req
283. Okay.Copy !req
284. The old man told me to
take any rug in the house.Copy !req
285. Well, enjoy.Copy !req
286. And perhaps we'll see you
again sometime, Dude.Copy !req
287. Yeah, sure.Copy !req
288. If I'm in the neighborhood, you know,Copy !req
289. and I need to use the john.Copy !req
290. Blow on them. Huh?Copy !req
291. Go ahead. Blow.Copy !req
292. You want me to blow on your toes?Copy !req
293. Uh-huh.Copy !req
294. I can't blow that far.Copy !req
295. Are you sure he won't mind?Copy !req
296. Uli doesn't care about anything.
He's a nihilist.Copy !req
297. Oh, that must be exhausting.Copy !req
298. You're not blowing.Copy !req
299. Our guest has to be getting
along, Mrs. Lebowski.Copy !req
300. Oh!Copy !req
301. You're Bunny.Copy !req
302. I'll suck your cock for $1,000.Copy !req
303. Wonderful woman.Copy !req
304. We're all very fond of her.
Very free-spirited.Copy !req
305. Brandt can't watch though,
or he has to pay $100.Copy !req
306. That's marvelous.Copy !req
307. I'm just gonna go find a cash machine.Copy !req
308. I'm slamming them tonight!Copy !req
309. You guys are dead in the water.Copy !req
310. All right! Way to go, Donny!Copy !req
311. "if you
will it, it is no dream."Copy !req
312. Fucking 20 minutes late, man.
What the fuck is that?Copy !req
313. Theodore Herzl. Huh?Copy !req
314. State of Israel. If you will
it, Dude, it is no dream.Copy !req
315. What the fuck are you talking about, man?Copy !req
316. The carrier. What's in the
fucking carrier? Huh?Copy !req
317. Oh! Cynthia's dog. Think it's a Pomeranian.Copy !req
318. Can't leave him home alone
or he eats the furniture.Copy !req
319. I'm watching it while Cynthia and
Marty Ackerman are in Hawaii.Copy !req
320. You brought a fucking Pomeranian bowling?Copy !req
321. What do you mean, brought it bowling?Copy !req
322. I didn't rent it shoes. I'm
not buying it a fucking beer.Copy !req
323. He's not taking your fucking turn, Dude.Copy !req
324. Man, if my fucking ex-wife asked
me to take care of her fucking dogCopy !req
325. while she and her boyfriend
went to Honolulu,Copy !req
326. I'd tell her to go fuck herself.
Why can't she board it?Copy !req
327. First of all, Dude, you don't have an ex.Copy !req
328. Secondly, this is a fucking
show dog with fucking papers.Copy !req
329. You can't board it. It gets upset.
Its hair falls out.Copy !req
330. Walter... Fucking dog has fucking papers.Copy !req
331. Over the line! Huh?Copy !req
332. I'm sorry, Smokey. You were over the line.
That's a foul.Copy !req
333. Bullshit. Mark it eight, Dude.Copy !req
334. Excuse me. Mark it zero. Next frame.Copy !req
335. Bullshit, Walter. Mark it eight, Dude.Copy !req
336. Smokey, this is not Nam. This is bowling.
There are rules.Copy !req
337. Hey, Walter, come on.
Hey, man, it's Smokey.Copy !req
338. So his toe slipped over a little, you know.Copy !req
339. It's just a game, man.
This is a league game.Copy !req
340. This determines who enters
the next round robin.Copy !req
341. Am I wrong? Yeah, but I wasn't...Copy !req
342. Am I wrong? Yeah, but I wasn't over.Copy !req
343. Give me the marker, Dude.
I'm marking an eight.Copy !req
344. Smokey, my friend,Copy !req
345. you're entering a world of pain.
Walter, man.Copy !req
346. You mark that frame an eight,
you're entering a world of pain.Copy !req
347. I'm not... A world of pain.Copy !req
348. Look, Dude, this is your partner.Copy !req
349. Has the whole world gone crazy?Copy !req
350. Am I the only one around here who
gives a shit about the rules?Copy !req
351. Mark it zero!Copy !req
352. They're calling the cops, man.
Put the piece away.Copy !req
353. Mark it zero! Walter,
put the piece away.Copy !req
354. Walter. You think I'm fucking around here?Copy !req
355. Mark it zero!Copy !req
356. All right. It's fucking zero.Copy !req
357. You happy, you crazy fuck?Copy !req
358. It's a league game, Smokey.Copy !req
359. You can't do that, man.Copy !req
360. These guys, you know, they're
like me, they're pacifists.Copy !req
361. Smokey was a conscientious objector.Copy !req
362. You know, Dude, I myself dabbled
in pacifism at one point.Copy !req
363. Not in Nam, of course.Copy !req
364. And you know he's got
emotional problems, man.Copy !req
365. You mean, beyond pacifism?Copy !req
366. He's fragile. He's very fragile.Copy !req
367. I did not know that.Copy !req
368. Well, it's all water under the bridge.Copy !req
369. And we do enter the next round robin.Copy !req
370. Am I wrong? No, you're not wrong.Copy !req
371. Am I wrong? You're not wrong, Walter.Copy !req
372. You're just an asshole.Copy !req
373. Okay then.Copy !req
374. Play Quintana and O'Brien next week.Copy !req
375. They should be pushovers.Copy !req
376. Man, would you just...Copy !req
377. Just take it easy, man.Copy !req
378. You know, that's your answer
for everything, Dude.Copy !req
379. Let me point out something.
Pacifism is not...Copy !req
380. Look at our current situation
with that camel fucker in Iraq.Copy !req
381. Pacifism is not something to hide behind.Copy !req
382. Just take it easy, man.Copy !req
383. I'm perfectly calm, Dude.Copy !req
384. Yeah, waving the fucking gun around?
Calmer than you are.Copy !req
385. Will you just take it easy?Copy !req
386. Calmer than you are.Copy !req
387. Dude, this is Smokey.Copy !req
388. Look, I don't wanna be
a hard-on about this,Copy !req
389. and I know it wasn't your fault,Copy !req
390. but I just thought it was fair to tell youCopy !req
391. that Gilbert and I will be
submitting this to the leagueCopy !req
392. and asking them to set aside the round.Copy !req
393. I don't know, maybe forfeit it to us.Copy !req
394. So, like I say, just thought,
you know, fair warning.Copy !req
395. Tell Walter.Copy !req
396. I'm sorry.Copy !req
397. Mr. Lebowski, this is Brandt at...Copy !req
398. Well, at Mr. Lebowski's office.Copy !req
399. Please call us as soon as it's convenient.Copy !req
400. Mr. Lebowski, this is Mel ZelnickerCopy !req
401. of the Southern Cal Bowling League.Copy !req
402. I just got an informal report that a
member of your team, a Walter Sobchak,Copy !req
403. drew a firearm during league play.Copy !req
404. if
this is true, of course,Copy !req
405. it contravenes a number
of the league's bylawsCopy !req
406. and also article 27 of the league...Copy !req
407. Dude. Hey, Marty.Copy !req
408. Dude, I finally got...Copy !req
409. I got the venue I wanted.Copy !req
410. I'm performing my dance
quintet, you know, my cycle,Copy !req
411. at Crane Jackson's Fountain
Street Theater on Tuesday night.Copy !req
412. And, well, I'd love it if
you came and gave me notes.Copy !req
413. I'll be there, man.Copy !req
414. Dude, tomorrow's already the tenth.Copy !req
415. Far out.Copy !req
416. Oh. Oh, all right. Okay.Copy !req
417. Just slip the rent under my door.Copy !req
418. serious
infraction and examine your standing.Copy !req
419. Thank you.Copy !req
420. Mr. Lebowski, Brandt again.Copy !req
421. Please do call us as soon as you
get in and I'll send the limo.Copy !req
422. I hope you're not avoiding
this call because of the rug,Copy !req
423. which I assure you is not a problem.Copy !req
424. We need your help, and...Copy !req
425. Well, we would very much like to see you.
Thank you. It's Brandt.Copy !req
426. We've had some terrible news.Copy !req
427. Mr. Lebowski's in seclusion
in the west wing.Copy !req
428. Mr. Lebowski.Copy !req
429. Funny.Copy !req
430. I can look back on a life of achievement,Copy !req
431. challenges met,Copy !req
432. competitors bested,Copy !req
433. obstacles overcome.Copy !req
434. I've accomplished more than most menCopy !req
435. and without the use of my legs.Copy !req
436. What makes a man, Mr. Lebowski?Copy !req
437. Dude. Huh?Copy !req
438. Oh, I don't know, sir.Copy !req
439. Is it being prepared to do the right thing,Copy !req
440. whatever the cost?Copy !req
441. Isn't that what makes a man?Copy !req
442. Sure, that and a pair of testicles.Copy !req
443. You're joking,Copy !req
444. but perhaps you're right.Copy !req
445. You mind if I do a Jay?Copy !req
446. Bunny.Copy !req
447. Excuse me?Copy !req
448. Bunny Lebowski.Copy !req
449. She is the light of my life.Copy !req
450. Are you surprised at my tears, sir?Copy !req
451. Oh, fucking A.Copy !req
452. Strong men also cry.Copy !req
453. I received this fax this morning.Copy !req
454. As you can see, it is a ransom note.Copy !req
455. "We have Bunny."Copy !req
456. Written by men who were unable to
achieve on a level field of play.Copy !req
457. "Gather $1 million..."Copy !req
458. Cowards! "... In unmarked,
nonconsecutive 20s."Copy !req
459. Weaklings! "Await instructions."Copy !req
460. Bums! "No funny stuff."Copy !req
461. Bummer. Huh?Copy !req
462. This is a bummer, man. That's...
That's a bummer.Copy !req
463. Brandt will fill you in on the details.Copy !req
464. Mr. Lebowski is prepared to make a
generous offer to you to act as courierCopy !req
465. once we get instructions for the money.Copy !req
466. Why me, man?Copy !req
467. He believes the culprits might be
the very people who soiled your rugCopy !req
468. and you are in a unique position to
confirm or disconfirm that suspicion.Copy !req
469. He thinks the carpet pissers did this?Copy !req
470. Well, Dude, we just don't know.Copy !req
471. Welcome to the Hotel CaliforniaCopy !req
472. Such a lovely placeCopy !req
473. Fucking Quintana.Copy !req
474. That creep can roll, man.Copy !req
475. Yeah, but he's a pervert, Dude. Yeah.Copy !req
476. No, he's a sex offender with a record.Copy !req
477. He did six months in Chino for
exposing himself to an eight-year-old.Copy !req
478. When he moved to Hollywood,
he had to go door-to-doorCopy !req
479. to tell everyone he was a pederast.Copy !req
480. What's a pederast, Walter?
Shut the fuck up, Donny.Copy !req
481. So, how much did he give you?Copy !req
482. 20 grand, man. And, of course,
I still get to keep the rug.Copy !req
483. Just for making a hand-off? Yeah.Copy !req
484. They gave Dude a beeper.Copy !req
485. So whenever these guys call...
What if it's during a game?Copy !req
486. Oh, I told them if it was
during league play...Copy !req
487. What's during league play?Copy !req
488. Life does not stop and
start at your convenience,Copy !req
489. you miserable piece of shit.Copy !req
490. I figure... What's wrong with Walter, Dude?Copy !req
491. I figure it's easy money, you know.
It's all pretty harmless.Copy !req
492. She probably kidnapped herself.Copy !req
493. What do you mean, Dude?
Rug-peers did not do this.Copy !req
494. Look at it. A young trophy wife
marries this guy for his money.Copy !req
495. She figures he isn't giving
her enough, you know.Copy !req
496. She owes money all over town.Copy !req
497. That fucking bitch!Copy !req
498. It's all a goddamn fake, man.Copy !req
499. It's like Lenin said,Copy !req
500. you look for the person who
will benefit and, you know...Copy !req
501. I Am the Walrus? You know, you'll...Copy !req
502. You know what I'm trying to say.
I Am the Walrus.Copy !req
503. That fucking bitch! Oh, yeah!Copy !req
504. I Am the Walrus. That's...Copy !req
505. Shut the fuck up, Donny!Copy !req
506. V. I. Lenin, Vladimir Ilyich Ulyanov!Copy !req
507. What the fuck is he talking about?Copy !req
508. Fucking exactly what happened to those...Copy !req
509. That makes me fucking sick!Copy !req
510. Well, what do you care, Walter?
Those rich fucks.Copy !req
511. This whole fucking thing.Copy !req
512. I did not watch my buddies
die face down in the muckCopy !req
513. so that this fucking strumpet,Copy !req
514. this fucking whore, could waltz around...Copy !req
515. I don't see any connection
with Vietnam, man.Copy !req
516. Well, there isn't a
literal connection, Dude.Copy !req
517. No, Walter, face it, there
isn't any connection.Copy !req
518. Your roll. Have it your way.Copy !req
519. Your roll. But my point is...Copy !req
520. My point is... Are
you ready to be fucked, man?Copy !req
521. I see you rolled your way into the semis.Copy !req
522. Dios mío, man.Copy !req
523. Liam and me, we're gonna fuck you up.Copy !req
524. Yeah? Well, you know, that's
just like your opinion, man.Copy !req
525. Let me tell you something, pendejo.Copy !req
526. You pull any of your crazy shit with us,Copy !req
527. you flash a piece out on the lanes,Copy !req
528. I'll take it away from you
and stick it up your assCopy !req
529. and pull the fucking trigger
till it goes click.Copy !req
530. Jesus.Copy !req
531. You said it, man.Copy !req
532. Nobody fucks with the Jesus.Copy !req
533. Eight-year-olds, Dude.Copy !req
534. La-la-la, la-la-la, la-la-laCopy !req
535. La-la-la, la, la, la, laCopy !req
536. La-la, la-laCopy !req
537. La-la-laCopy !req
538. La-la-la, la-la-laCopy !req
539. La-la, la-laCopy !req
540. The man in me will doCopy !req
541. Nearly any taskCopy !req
542. And as for compensationCopy !req
543. There's little he would askCopy !req
544. Take a woman like youCopy !req
545. To get throughCopy !req
546. To the man in meCopy !req
547. Storm clouds are ragingCopy !req
548. All around my doorCopy !req
549. I think to myselfCopy !req
550. I might not take it anymoreCopy !req
551. Take a woman like your kindCopy !req
552. To find the man in meCopy !req
553. But, ohCopy !req
554. What a wonderful feelingCopy !req
555. Just to knowCopy !req
556. That you are nearCopy !req
557. Sets my heart a-reelingCopy !req
558. From my toesCopy !req
559. Up to my earsCopy !req
560. The man in me will hide sometimesCopy !req
561. They called about 80 minutes ago.Copy !req
562. They want you to take the
money, drive north on the 405.Copy !req
563. They will call you on the portable phoneCopy !req
564. with instructions in about 40 minutes.Copy !req
565. One person only.Copy !req
566. They were very clear on that, or
I'd go with you. One person only.Copy !req
567. What happened to your jaw?
Oh, nothing, man.Copy !req
568. Here's the money.Copy !req
569. And the phone.Copy !req
570. Please, Dude, follow whatever
instructions they give.Copy !req
571. All right. Her life is in your hands.Copy !req
572. Man, don't say that.Copy !req
573. Mr. Lebowski asked me to repeat
that, her life is in your hands.Copy !req
574. Oh, shit, man.Copy !req
575. Her life is in your hands, Dude.Copy !req
576. Report back to us as soon as it's done.Copy !req
577. Where the fuck are you going, man?
Take the ringer, I'll drive.Copy !req
578. The what? The ringer.Copy !req
579. The ringer, Dude.Copy !req
580. What the... Have they called yet?Copy !req
581. What the hell is this?Copy !req
582. My dirty undies, Dude. The laundry.
The whites.Copy !req
583. Walter, I'm sure there's a reason
you brought your dirty undies, man.Copy !req
584. That's right, Dude. The weight.Copy !req
585. The ringer cannot look empty.Copy !req
586. Walter, what the fuck
are you thinking, man?Copy !req
587. You're right, Dude. I got to thinking.Copy !req
588. I got to thinking, why should we settle
for a measly fucking 20 grand...Copy !req
589. We? What the fuck, "we"? You said
you just wanted to come along.Copy !req
590. My point, Dude, is why should
we settle for 20 grandCopy !req
591. when we can keep the entire million?
Am I wrong?Copy !req
592. Yes, you're wrong. This
isn't a fucking game, man.Copy !req
593. Oh, but it is a game. You said so yourself.Copy !req
594. She kidnapped herself. I said I thought...Copy !req
595. Dude, here. Who is this?Copy !req
596. Dude. The bagman, man. Where
do you want us to go?Copy !req
597. Us?Copy !req
598. Shit!Copy !req
599. Yeah, you know, me and the driver.Copy !req
600. I'm not handling the money, driving the
car and talking on the phone all by my...Copy !req
601. Shut the fuck up!Copy !req
602. Dude, are you fucking this up? Who is that?Copy !req
603. That is the driver. I told you...Copy !req
604. Oh, shit! What the fuck's going on?Copy !req
605. Walter... What the fuck is going on?Copy !req
606. He hung up, man. You fucked it up.
You fucked it up!Copy !req
607. Her life was in our hands, man. Easy, Dude.Copy !req
608. We're screwed now. We don't get shit.
They're gonna kill her.Copy !req
609. We're fucked, Walter.
Nothing is fucked, Dude.Copy !req
610. Come on. You're being very un-Dude.Copy !req
611. They'll call back. Look, she kidnapped...Copy !req
612. You see? Nothing's fucked here, Dude.Copy !req
613. Nothing is fucked. They're a
bunch of fucking amateurs.Copy !req
614. Walter, will you just shut the fuck up?Copy !req
615. Don't say peep while I'm
doing business here, man.Copy !req
616. Okay, Dude. Have it your way.Copy !req
617. But they're amateurs. Fuck.Copy !req
618. Dude.Copy !req
619. Okay, we proceed but only
if there is no funny stuff.Copy !req
620. Yeah, yeah.Copy !req
621. So no funny stuff. Okay?Copy !req
622. Just tell me where the
fuck you want us to go.Copy !req
623. That was the sign, man.Copy !req
624. So, all we gotta do is get her back.Copy !req
625. No one's in a position to complain.Copy !req
626. We keep the baksheesh.
Yeah, terrific, Walter.Copy !req
627. But you haven't told me how we're
gonna get her back. Where is she?Copy !req
628. That's the simple part, Dude.Copy !req
629. We make the hand-off, I grab one of
them and beat it out of him. Huh?Copy !req
630. That's a great plan, Walter.Copy !req
631. That's fucking ingenious, if
I understand it correctly.Copy !req
632. It's a Swiss fucking watch.Copy !req
633. That's right, Dude. The beauty
of this is its simplicity.Copy !req
634. Once a plan gets too complex,
everything can go wrong.Copy !req
635. If there's one thing I learned in Nam...Copy !req
636. Dude.Copy !req
637. You are coming to wooden bridge.Copy !req
638. When you cross the bridge,Copy !req
639. you throw the bag from the
left window of the moving car.Copy !req
640. You're being watched.Copy !req
641. Fuck. What'd he say? Where's the hand-off?Copy !req
642. There is no fucking hand-off, man.Copy !req
643. At the wooden bridge we throw
the money out of the car.Copy !req
644. We throw the money out of the moving car.Copy !req
645. We can't do that, Dude.
That fucks up our plan.Copy !req
646. Well, call them up and
explain it to them, Walter.Copy !req
647. Your plan is so fucking simple,Copy !req
648. I'm sure they'll fucking understand it.Copy !req
649. That's the beauty of it.Copy !req
650. Wooden bridge, huh?
Throw them the money, Walter.Copy !req
651. We're not fucking around, man.Copy !req
652. Okay, Dude, the bridge is coming up.
Give me the ringer, chop-chop.Copy !req
653. Fuck that. Walter, I love you,Copy !req
654. but sooner or later you're gonna have to
face the fact you're a goddamn moron.Copy !req
655. Okay, Dude. No time to argue. Hey, man!Copy !req
656. Here's the bridge. Hey, Walter!
Hey, Walter!Copy !req
657. Hey, Walter! Here goes the ringer!Copy !req
658. What the fuck? Okay, Dude, you're wheel.Copy !req
659. Hey, man, what the fuck?
At 15 mph, I roll out.Copy !req
660. I double back, grab one of
them and beat it out of him.Copy !req
661. The Uzi. Uzi.Copy !req
662. You didn't think I was rolling
out of here naked, did you?Copy !req
663. Walter, please! Fifteen, Dude! This is it!
Let's take that hill!Copy !req
664. Walter!Copy !req
665. We have it!Copy !req
666. Fuck it, Dude.Copy !req
667. Let's go bowling.Copy !req
668. Aitz chaim he, Dude, as the ex used to say.Copy !req
669. What the fuck is that supposed to mean?Copy !req
670. What the fuck are we gonna tell Lebowski?Copy !req
671. Oh, him.Copy !req
672. I don't know. What exactly is the problem?Copy !req
673. The problem is...Copy !req
674. What do you mean, what's the...Copy !req
675. There was no...Copy !req
676. We didn't...Copy !req
677. They're gonna kill that poor woman, man!Copy !req
678. What the fuck are you talking about?Copy !req
679. The poor woman, that poor
slut kidnapped herself.Copy !req
680. Come on, Dude. You said so yourself.Copy !req
681. Man, I said I thought
she kidnapped herself.Copy !req
682. You're the one who's so fucking certain.Copy !req
683. That's right, Dude. 100% certain.Copy !req
684. They posted the next round
for the tournament.Copy !req
685. Donny, shut the fuck...Copy !req
686. When do we play? This Saturday.
Quintana and...Copy !req
687. Saturday? Well, they'll have to reschedule.Copy !req
688. Walter, what am I gonna tell Lebowski?Copy !req
689. I told that fuck down at the league office.
Who's in charge of scheduling?Copy !req
690. Walter! Burkhalter.Copy !req
691. I told that kraut a fucking thousand
times, I don't roll on shabbos!Copy !req
692. Walter! They already posted it.Copy !req
693. Well, they can fucking un-post it!Copy !req
694. Who gives a shit? They're gonna
kill that poor woman, man!Copy !req
695. What am I gonna tell Lebowski?
Come on, Dude.Copy !req
696. Eventually she'll get tired of her little
game and, you know, wander on back.Copy !req
697. How come you don't roll
on Saturday, Walter?Copy !req
698. I'm shomer shabbos.Copy !req
699. What's that, Walter? Yeah,
and in the meantime,Copy !req
700. what do I tell Lebowski?Copy !req
701. Saturday, Donny, is shabbos,
the Jewish day of rest.Copy !req
702. That means I don't work,
I don't drive a car,Copy !req
703. I don't fucking ride in a car,Copy !req
704. I don't handle money, I
don't turn on the ovenCopy !req
705. and I sure as shit don't fucking roll!Copy !req
706. Sheesh.Copy !req
707. Shomer shabbos!Copy !req
708. Walter, how am I gonna...
Shomer fucking shabbos!Copy !req
709. Oh, fuck! That's it. I'm out of here.
Oh, come on, Dude.Copy !req
710. Dude! Dude!Copy !req
711. You just tell him...Copy !req
712. Tell him we made the drop and
everything went, you know...Copy !req
713. Oh, yeah. How'd it go?Copy !req
714. Went all right. Dude's car
got a little dinged up.Copy !req
715. Walter, we didn't make the
fucking hand-off, man!Copy !req
716. They didn't get the fucking money!Copy !req
717. And they're gonna... They're gonna...Copy !req
718. They're gonna kill that poor woman.Copy !req
719. They're gonna kill that poor woman!Copy !req
720. Walter, if you can't ride in a car,Copy !req
721. then how do you get around on shabbos?Copy !req
722. Really, Dude, you surprise me.Copy !req
723. They're not gonna kill shit.Copy !req
724. They're not gonna do shit.Copy !req
725. What can they do to her?
Bunch of fucking amateurs.Copy !req
726. And meanwhile, look at the bottom line.Copy !req
727. Who's sitting on a million fucking dollars?Copy !req
728. Am I wrong? Walter.Copy !req
729. Who's got a fucking million fucking
dollars sitting in the trunk of our car?Copy !req
730. Our car, Walter? And what do they got?
My dirty undies.Copy !req
731. My fucking whites!Copy !req
732. Say, Dude?Copy !req
733. Where is your car?Copy !req
734. Who's got your undies, Walter?
Where's your car, Dude?Copy !req
735. You don't know, Walter?Copy !req
736. it was parked in a handicap zone.
Perhaps they towed it.Copy !req
737. You fucking
know it's been stolen.Copy !req
738. Well, certainly that's a possibility, Dude.Copy !req
739. Oh, fuck it.Copy !req
740. Where you going, Dude?
I'm going home, Donny.Copy !req
741. Phone's ringing, Dude. Thank you, Donny!Copy !req
742. Yeah.Copy !req
743. Green with some brown, rust coloration.Copy !req
744. And was there anything of value in the car?Copy !req
745. Oh, yeah.Copy !req
746. A tape deck, some Creedence
tapes, and there was a...Copy !req
747. My briefcase.Copy !req
748. In the briefcase?Copy !req
749. Papers.Copy !req
750. Just papers.Copy !req
751. You know, my papers, business papers.Copy !req
752. And what do you do, sir? I'm unemployed.Copy !req
753. My rug was also stolen.Copy !req
754. Your rug was in the car?Copy !req
755. No. Here.Copy !req
756. Separate incidents.Copy !req
757. The Dude is not in.Copy !req
758. Do you find them much, these stolen cars?Copy !req
759. Sometimes.Copy !req
760. Wouldn't hold out much hope
for the tape deck though.Copy !req
761. Or the Creedence.Copy !req
762. What about the briefcase?Copy !req
763. Mr. Lebowski, I'd like to see you.Copy !req
764. Call when you get home and
I'll send a car for you.Copy !req
765. My name is Maude Lebowski. I'm
the one who took your rug.Copy !req
766. Well, guess we can close
the file on that one.Copy !req
767. I'll be with you in a moment, Mr. Lebowski.Copy !req
768. Does the female form make you
uncomfortable, Mr. Lebowski?Copy !req
769. Is that what this is a picture of?
In a sense, yes.Copy !req
770. My art has been commended
as being strongly vaginal,Copy !req
771. which bothers some men.Copy !req
772. The word itself makes
some men uncomfortable.Copy !req
773. Vagina. Oh, yeah?Copy !req
774. Yes, they don't like hearing it
and find it difficult to say,Copy !req
775. whereas without batting an eye,Copy !req
776. a man will refer to his dick,
or his rod or his johnson.Copy !req
777. "Johnson"?Copy !req
778. All right, Mr. Lebowski,
let's get down to cases.Copy !req
779. My father told me he agreed
to let you have the rug,Copy !req
780. but as it was a gift from me to my
late mother, it was not his to give.Copy !req
781. Now, your face.Copy !req
782. As for this kidnapping.Copy !req
783. Huh?Copy !req
784. Yes, I know all about it, and I
know that you acted as courier.Copy !req
785. Let me tell you something. The
whole thing stinks to high heaven.Copy !req
786. Yeah, right, but let me explain
something about the rug.Copy !req
787. Do you like sex, Mr. Lebowski?Copy !req
788. Excuse me? Sex, the physical
act of love. Coitus.Copy !req
789. Do you like it? I was talking about my rug.Copy !req
790. You're not interested in sex?Copy !req
791. You mean coitus? I like it, too.Copy !req
792. It's a male myth about
feminists that we hate sex.Copy !req
793. It can be a natural, zesty enterprise.Copy !req
794. However, there are some people,Copy !req
795. it is called satyriasis in
men, nymphomania in women,Copy !req
796. who engage in it compulsively
and without joy.Copy !req
797. Oh, no. Oh, yes, Mr. Lebowski.Copy !req
798. These unfortunate souls cannot love,
in the true sense of the word.Copy !req
799. Our mutual acquaintance,
Bunny, is one of these.Copy !req
800. Listen, Maude,Copy !req
801. I'm sorry if your stepmother is a nympho,Copy !req
802. but, you know, I don't see
what this has to do with...Copy !req
803. You have any Kahlua? Take
a look at this, sir.Copy !req
804. Oh, I know that guy.Copy !req
805. He's a nihilist.Copy !req
806. "Karl Hungus."Copy !req
807. Hi. Hello.Copy !req
808. Mein dispatcher says there is
something wrong with dein Kabel.Copy !req
809. Yeah. Come on in.Copy !req
810. I'm not really sure exactly what's
really wrong with the cable.Copy !req
811. That's why they sent me. I am an expert.Copy !req
812. The TV's in here.Copy !req
813. You recognize her, of course.
Helga, bring my tools.Copy !req
814. That's my friend Sherry.Copy !req
815. She just came over to use the shower.Copy !req
816. The story is ludicrous.Copy !req
817. My name is Karl. Ich bin expert.Copy !req
818. You must be here to fix the cable.Copy !req
819. Lord, you can imagine
where it goes from here.Copy !req
820. He fixes the cable?Copy !req
821. Don't be fatuous, Jeffrey.Copy !req
822. Little matter to me that this woman chose
to pursue a career in pornography,Copy !req
823. nor that she has been
banging Jackie Treehorn,Copy !req
824. to use the parlance of our times.Copy !req
825. However, I am one of the two
trustees of the Lebowski Foundation,Copy !req
826. the other being my father.Copy !req
827. The foundation takes
youngsters from Watts and...Copy !req
828. Shit, yeah. The achievers.Copy !req
829. Little Lebowski Urban Achievers, yes,
and proud we are of all of them.Copy !req
830. I asked my father about his withdrawal of
$1 million from the foundation account,Copy !req
831. and he told me about this abduction,Copy !req
832. but I tell you it is preposterous.Copy !req
833. This compulsive fornicator is taking
my father for the proverbial ride.Copy !req
834. Yeah, but my... I'm getting to your rug.Copy !req
835. My father and I don't get along.Copy !req
836. He doesn't approve of my lifestyle and,Copy !req
837. needless to say, I don't approve of his.Copy !req
838. However, I hardly wish to make my
father's embezzlement a police matter.Copy !req
839. So I'm proposing that you
try to recover the moneyCopy !req
840. from the people you delivered it to.Copy !req
841. Well, I could do that.Copy !req
842. If you successfully do so,Copy !req
843. I will compensate you to the tune
of 10% of the recovered sum.Copy !req
844. A hundred... Thousand. Yes.Copy !req
845. Bones or clams or whatever you call them.Copy !req
846. Yeah, but what about my... Your rug, yes.Copy !req
847. Well, with that money you
can buy any number of rugsCopy !req
848. that don't have sentimental value for me.Copy !req
849. And I am sorry about that crack on the jaw.Copy !req
850. Oh, that's fine. That doesn't even...Copy !req
851. Here's the name and number of a
doctor who will look at it for you.Copy !req
852. You will receive no bill.Copy !req
853. He's a good man and thorough.Copy !req
854. That's thoughtful but...Copy !req
855. Please see him, Jeffrey. He's
a good man and thorough.Copy !req
856. Oh, well, all right.Copy !req
857. So he says, "My wife's a pain in the ass.Copy !req
858. "She's always busting my frigging agates.Copy !req
859. "My daughter's married to a loser bastard.Copy !req
860. "I got a rash so bad on my
ass I can't even sit down.Copy !req
861. "But you know me, I can't complain."Copy !req
862. I got a rash, man. Fucking A.Copy !req
863. I gotta tell you, Tone, man,Copy !req
864. earlier today I was really
feeling shitty, man.Copy !req
865. Really down in the dumps.Copy !req
866. Lost a little money...Copy !req
867. Hey, you know what? Forget about it, huh?
Forget about it.Copy !req
868. Yeah, fuck it, man.Copy !req
869. You can't be worried about that shit.
Life goes on, man.Copy !req
870. Well, home, sweet home, Mr. L.Copy !req
871. Hey, yo. Come here.Copy !req
872. Who's your friend in the Volkswagen? Huh?Copy !req
873. Yeah. He followed us here.Copy !req
874. When did he start... Whoa! What the fuck?Copy !req
875. Get in the limo, you son of a bitch!
No arguments!Copy !req
876. Hey! Hey! Careful, man!
There's a beverage here!Copy !req
877. Start talking, and talk
fast, you lousy bum.Copy !req
878. We've been frantically
trying to reach you, Dude.Copy !req
879. Where is my goddamn money, you bum?Copy !req
880. Well, we... I don't...Copy !req
881. They did not receive the money, you nitwit!Copy !req
882. They did not receive the money!Copy !req
883. Her life was in your hands!Copy !req
884. This is our concern, Dude.Copy !req
885. No, man. Nothing is fucked here.Copy !req
886. Nothing is fucked? No, man.Copy !req
887. The goddamn plane has
crashed into the mountain!Copy !req
888. Man, come on. Who are you gonna
believe, those guys or...Copy !req
889. We dropped off the damn money.Copy !req
890. We?Copy !req
891. I, the royal we.Copy !req
892. You know. The editorial...Copy !req
893. I dropped off the money exactly as per...Copy !req
894. Look, man, I've got certain information.
All right?Copy !req
895. Certain things have come to light and...Copy !req
896. You know, has it ever occurred to youCopy !req
897. that instead of, you know,
running around, blaming me...Copy !req
898. You know, given the nature
of all this new shit,Copy !req
899. you know, this could be
a lot more complex...Copy !req
900. I mean, it's not just... it might not
be just such a simple... You know?Copy !req
901. What in God's holy name
are you blathering about?Copy !req
902. Well, I'll tell you what
I'm blathering about.Copy !req
903. I've got information, man.Copy !req
904. New shit has come to light.Copy !req
905. And, shit, man,Copy !req
906. she kidnapped herself.Copy !req
907. Well, sure, man. Look at it. You know?Copy !req
908. A young trophy wife, in the
parlance of our times, you know.Copy !req
909. She owes money all over town,
including to known pornographers.Copy !req
910. And that's cool. That's cool.Copy !req
911. I'm saying she needs money, man.Copy !req
912. And, you know, of course they're
gonna say they didn't get itCopy !req
913. because she wants more, man.Copy !req
914. She's gotta feed the monkey. I mean...Copy !req
915. Hasn't that ever occurred to you, man?Copy !req
916. Sir?Copy !req
917. No, Mr. Lebowski, it had
not occurred to me.Copy !req
918. That had not occurred to us, Dude.Copy !req
919. Well, okay, you know?Copy !req
920. You guys aren't privy to all
the new shit, so, you know...Copy !req
921. But, hey, that's what you...
That's what you pay me for.Copy !req
922. Speaking of which,Copy !req
923. do you think that you could
give me my $20,000 in cash?Copy !req
924. My concern is, and I've gotta
check it with my accountant,Copy !req
925. that this might bump me
up into a higher tax...Copy !req
926. Brandt, give him the envelope.Copy !req
927. Oh, well, if you've already got
the check made out, that's cool.Copy !req
928. We received this this morning.Copy !req
929. Since you have failed to achieve,Copy !req
930. even in the modest task
which was your charge,Copy !req
931. since you have stolen my money,Copy !req
932. since you have unrepentantly
betrayed my trust,Copy !req
933. I have no choice but to tell these bumsCopy !req
934. to do whatever is necessaryCopy !req
935. to recover their money from
you, Jeffrey Lebowski.Copy !req
936. And with Brandt as my witness,
I will tell you this,Copy !req
937. any further harm visited upon BunnyCopy !req
938. will be visited tenfold upon your head.Copy !req
939. By God, sir,Copy !req
940. I will not abide another toe.Copy !req
941. I hear the cottonwoods whispering aboveCopy !req
942. That wasn't her toe, Dude.Copy !req
943. Whose toe was it, Walter?
How the fuck should I know?Copy !req
944. I do know that nothing about it indicates...
The nail polish, Walter.Copy !req
945. Fine, Dude.Copy !req
946. As if it's impossible to get some nail
polish, apply it to someone else's toe...Copy !req
947. Someone else... Pinking shears.Copy !req
948. Where the fuck are they gonna get...Copy !req
949. You want a toe? I can get you a toe.Copy !req
950. Believe me, there are ways, Dude.Copy !req
951. You don't wanna know about it, believe me.
Yeah, but, Walter...Copy !req
952. Hell, I could get you a toe by 3:00
this afternoon with nail polish.Copy !req
953. These fucking amateurs. Walter...Copy !req
954. They send us a toe, we're supposed
to shit ourselves with fear.Copy !req
955. Jesus Christ! Walter...Copy !req
956. The point is... They're
gonna kill her, Walter,Copy !req
957. and then they're gonna kill me.Copy !req
958. Dude, that's...Copy !req
959. That's just the stress talking, man.Copy !req
960. Now, so far we have what appears to me
to be a series of victimless crimes.Copy !req
961. What about the toe? Forget
about the fucking toe!Copy !req
962. Excuse me, sir. Could you
please keep your voices down?Copy !req
963. This is a family restaurant.Copy !req
964. Oh, please! Dear, for your information,Copy !req
965. the Supreme Court has roundly
rejected prior restraint.Copy !req
966. Come on. Walter, this is not a
First Amendment thing, man.Copy !req
967. Sir, if you don't calm down, I'm
gonna have to ask you to leave.Copy !req
968. Lady, I got buddies who
died face down in the muckCopy !req
969. so that you and I can enjoy
this family restaurant!Copy !req
970. All right, I'm out of here.
Hey, Dude, don't go away, man.Copy !req
971. Come on. This affects all of us, man!
it's our basic freedoms!Copy !req
972. I'm staying.Copy !req
973. I'm finishing my coffee.Copy !req
974. Enjoying my coffee.Copy !req
975. The Dude is not in.Copy !req
976. Leave a message after the beep.
It takes a minute.Copy !req
977. Mr. Lebowski, this is Duty
Officer Rolvaag of the LAPD.Copy !req
978. We've recovered your automobile.Copy !req
979. It can be claimed at the North Hollywood
Auto Circus there on Victory.Copy !req
980. Their hours there are...Copy !req
981. Far out, man. Far fucking out!Copy !req
982. Hey! This is a private residence, man.Copy !req
983. Oh, nice marmot.Copy !req
984. Where is the money, Lebowski?
We wants the money, Lebowski!Copy !req
985. You think we are kidding or
making with the funny stuff?Copy !req
986. We could do things you haven't
dreamed of, Lebowski.Copy !req
987. Ja, we believes in nothing. We believes
in nothing, Lebowski. Nothing!Copy !req
988. And tomorrow we come back and
we cut off your johnson.Copy !req
989. Excuse me? I said, we cut off your johnson!Copy !req
990. Just think about that, Lebowski.Copy !req
991. Your wiggly penis, Lebowski.Copy !req
992. Ja. Maybe we stomp on it and squish it.Copy !req
993. it was discovered last night in
Van Nuys lodged against an abutment.Copy !req
994. Oh, man. Lodged where?Copy !req
995. You're lucky she didn't get
chopped, Mr. Lebowski.Copy !req
996. Oh, man! Must've been a joyride situation.Copy !req
997. They abandoned the vehicle once
they hit the retaining wall.Copy !req
998. Oh, my fucking briefcase, man!
It's not here! Shit!Copy !req
999. Yeah, I saw that on the report. Sorry.Copy !req
1000. You gotta get in on the other side.Copy !req
1001. The side view was found
on the road by the car.Copy !req
1002. You're lucky they left the tape
deck though, and the Creedence.Copy !req
1003. Oh, Jesus! What's that smell, man?Copy !req
1004. Yeah. It's probably a
vagrant slept in the car.Copy !req
1005. Or maybe just used it as
a toilet and moved on.Copy !req
1006. Hey, man,Copy !req
1007. are you gonna find these guys?Copy !req
1008. Or, you know, I mean... You
got any promising leads or...Copy !req
1009. Leads?Copy !req
1010. Yeah. Sure.Copy !req
1011. I'll just check with the
boys down at the crime lab.Copy !req
1012. They got four more detectives
working on the case.Copy !req
1013. They got us working in shifts!Copy !req
1014. Leads!Copy !req
1015. My only hope is that
the big Lebowski kills meCopy !req
1016. before the Germans can cut my dick off.Copy !req
1017. Leads!Copy !req
1018. Now, that is just ridiculous, Dude.Copy !req
1019. No one's going to cut your dick off.Copy !req
1020. Thank you, Walter. Not if I
have anything to say about it.Copy !req
1021. Thank you, Walter.Copy !req
1022. That makes me feel very secure. Dude?Copy !req
1023. That makes me feel very
warm inside, man. Dude?Copy !req
1024. This whole fucking thing.Copy !req
1025. I could be sitting here with
just pee stains on my rug.Copy !req
1026. But no, man, I got a, you know...
Yeah. Fucking Germans.Copy !req
1027. Nothing changes.Copy !req
1028. Fucking Nazis. They were Nazis, Dude?Copy !req
1029. Oh, come on, Donny. They
were threatening castration!Copy !req
1030. Uh-huh. Are we gonna split hairs here?Copy !req
1031. No. Am I wrong?Copy !req
1032. Well, he didn't... Man,
they were nihilists, man.Copy !req
1033. They kept saying they believed in nothing.Copy !req
1034. Nihilists.Copy !req
1035. Fuck me.Copy !req
1036. I mean, say what you want about the
tenets of national socialism, Dude.Copy !req
1037. At least it's an ethos. Yeah.Copy !req
1038. And, also, let's not forget...
Let's not forget, Dude,Copy !req
1039. that keeping wildlife,
an amphibious rodent,Copy !req
1040. for, you know, domestic...Copy !req
1041. Within the city...Copy !req
1042. That ain't legal, either. What are
you, a fucking park ranger now?Copy !req
1043. No! I'm just trying to...Copy !req
1044. Who gives a shit about the fucking marmot?Copy !req
1045. We are sympathizing here, Dude.
Fuck sympathy.Copy !req
1046. I don't need your fucking sympathy, man.
I need my fucking johnson.Copy !req
1047. What do you need that for, Dude?
You have got to buck up, man!Copy !req
1048. You cannot drag this negative
energy into the tournament.Copy !req
1049. Fuck the tournament. Fuck you, Walter.Copy !req
1050. Fuck the tournament?Copy !req
1051. Okay, Dude. I can see you don't
want to be cheered up here.Copy !req
1052. Come on, Donny. Let's go get us a lane.Copy !req
1053. Another Caucasian, Gary. Right, Dude.Copy !req
1054. Friends like these, huh, Gary?
That's right, Dude.Copy !req
1055. See them tumbling downCopy !req
1056. Pledging their love to the groundCopy !req
1057. Lonely, but free, I'll be foundCopy !req
1058. You got a good sarsaparilla?
Sioux City Sarsaparilla?Copy !req
1059. Yeah. That's a good one.Copy !req
1060. How're you doing there, Dude?Copy !req
1061. Not too good, man.Copy !req
1062. One of those days, huh? Yeah.Copy !req
1063. Well, a wiser fellow than myself once said,Copy !req
1064. "Sometimes you eat the bear and..."Copy !req
1065. Much obliged.Copy !req
1066. "Sometimes the bear, well, he eats you."Copy !req
1067. That some kind of Eastern thing?Copy !req
1068. Far from it.Copy !req
1069. I like your style, Dude.Copy !req
1070. Oh, well, I dig your style, too, man.Copy !req
1071. Got a whole cowboy thing going.Copy !req
1072. Thank you.Copy !req
1073. There's just one thing, Dude.Copy !req
1074. What's that?Copy !req
1075. Do you have to use so many cuss words?Copy !req
1076. What the fuck are you talking about?Copy !req
1077. Okay, Dude. Have it your way.Copy !req
1078. Take her easy, Dude.Copy !req
1079. Yeah. Thanks, man.Copy !req
1080. Call for you, Dude.Copy !req
1081. Hello? Jeffrey, you
have not gone to the doctor.Copy !req
1082. Oh, yeah, no. No, I haven't yet.Copy !req
1083. I'd like to see you immediately.Copy !req
1084. Oh?Copy !req
1085. So, you're Lebowski. Yeah.Copy !req
1086. Maude has told me all about you.Copy !req
1087. She'll be back in a minute. Sit down.Copy !req
1088. Do you want a drink? Yeah, sure.
White Russian.Copy !req
1089. The bar's over there.Copy !req
1090. So, what do you do, Lebowski?
Who the fuck are you, man?Copy !req
1091. Just a friend of Maudie's. Yeah?
The friend with the cleft asshole?Copy !req
1092. What do you do? Oh, nothing much.Copy !req
1093. Hello, Jeffrey. Hello.Copy !req
1094. Yeah. How are you? Listen, Maude.Copy !req
1095. I got toCopy !req
1096. tender my resignation or whateverCopy !req
1097. because looks like your mother
really was kidnapped after all.Copy !req
1098. She most certainly was not.Copy !req
1099. Hey, man, why don't you
fucking listen occasionally?Copy !req
1100. You might learn something. Now, I got...Copy !req
1101. Please
don't call her my mother.Copy !req
1102. She's most definitely the
perpetrator and not the victim.Copy !req
1103. I'm telling you, I've got
pretty definitive evidence.Copy !req
1104. From who? From the main guy, Uli.Copy !req
1105. Uli Kunkel? Her costar
in the beaver picture?Copy !req
1106. You mean vagina? I mean, you know the guy?Copy !req
1107. I might have introduced
them, for all I know.Copy !req
1108. Do you remember Uli?Copy !req
1109. He's a musician. Used to
have a group, Autobahn.Copy !req
1110. Look in my LP's. They released
one album in the late '70s.Copy !req
1111. Their music is sort of a techno pop.Copy !req
1112. So he's pretending to be the abductor?
Well, yeah.Copy !req
1113. Look, Jeffrey, you don't really kidnap
someone you're acquainted with.Copy !req
1114. The whole idea is that the hostage can't
identify you after you've let them go.Copy !req
1115. Well, I know that.Copy !req
1116. What the fuck is with this guy? Who is he?Copy !req
1117. Knox Harrington, the video artist.Copy !req
1118. So, Uli has the money.Copy !req
1119. Well, no, not exactly.Copy !req
1120. This is a very complicated case, Maude.Copy !req
1121. A lot of what-have-yousCopy !req
1122. and a lot of strands to
keep in my head, man.Copy !req
1123. You know, a lot of strands
in the old Duder's head.Copy !req
1124. Hello?Copy !req
1125. If Uli doesn't have it, then who does?Copy !req
1126. It's Sandra about the Biennale.Copy !req
1127. Look. I have to take this. Do you
still have that doctor's number?Copy !req
1128. No, really, it's not even bruised anymore.
Oh, please, Jeffrey.Copy !req
1129. I don't want to be responsible
for any delayed aftereffects.Copy !req
1130. Aftereffects?Copy !req
1131. Could you slide your shorts
down, Mr. Lebowski, please?Copy !req
1132. Mmm?Copy !req
1133. No, no, man. She hit me right here.Copy !req
1134. I understand. Could you slide
your shorts down, please?Copy !req
1135. Just got home from IllinoisCopy !req
1136. Locked the front door, oh, boyCopy !req
1137. Got to sit down, take a rest on the porchCopy !req
1138. Imagination sets inCopy !req
1139. Pretty soon I'm singin'Copy !req
1140. Doo, doo, dooCopy !req
1141. Looking out my back doorCopy !req
1142. Keeping mighty cool. There's
a giant doing cartwheelsCopy !req
1143. A statue wearing high heelsCopy !req
1144. Look at all the happy creaturesCopy !req
1145. Dancing on the lawnCopy !req
1146. A dinosaur Victrola listening to Buck OwensCopy !req
1147. Doo, doo, dooCopy !req
1148. Looking out my back doorCopy !req
1149. Tambourines and
elephants are playing in the bandCopy !req
1150. Doo, doo, dooCopy !req
1151. Wondrous apparition provided by magicianCopy !req
1152. Doo, doo, dooCopy !req
1153. Looking out my back doorCopy !req
1154. Tambourines and elephants
are playing in the bandCopy !req
1155. Won't you take a ride on the flying spoon?Copy !req
1156. Doo, doo, dooCopy !req
1157. Bother me tomorrowCopy !req
1158. Today I'll buy no sorrowsCopy !req
1159. Doo, doo, dooCopy !req
1160. Looking out my back doorCopy !req
1161. He lives in North Hollywood on
Radford, near the In-N-Out Burger.Copy !req
1162. No, the In-N-Out Burger's on Camrose.Copy !req
1163. Near the In-N-Out Burger. Those
are good burgers, Walter.Copy !req
1164. Shut the fuck up, Donny. The kid
is in the ninth grade, Dude.Copy !req
1165. And his father is... Are
you ready for this?Copy !req
1166. His father is Arthur Digby Sellers.Copy !req
1167. Who the fuck is that?Copy !req
1168. Who the fuck is Arthur Digby Sellers?
Who the...Copy !req
1169. Have you ever heard of a little
show called Branded, Dude?Copy !req
1170. Yes, yes, I...Copy !req
1171. "All but one man died
there at Bitter Creek."Copy !req
1172. I know the fucking show, Walter. So what?Copy !req
1173. Fucking Arthur Digby Sellers
wrote 156 episodes, Dude.Copy !req
1174. The bulk of the series.Copy !req
1175. Oh.Copy !req
1176. Not exactly a lightweight. No.Copy !req
1177. And yet his son is a fucking dunce.Copy !req
1178. Anyway, we'll go there
after the what-have-you.Copy !req
1179. We'll brace the kid. Should be a pushover.Copy !req
1180. We'll be near the In-N-Out Burger.Copy !req
1181. Shut the fuck up, Donny!Copy !req
1182. We'll go out there, we'll brace the kid.
He should be a pushover.Copy !req
1183. We'll get that fucking
million dollars back,Copy !req
1184. if he hasn't spent it already.Copy !req
1185. A million fucking clams.Copy !req
1186. And, yes, we'll be near the... In-N-Out.Copy !req
1187. Shh! Shh! Some burgers, some beers.
A few laughs.Copy !req
1188. Our fucking troubles are over, Dude.Copy !req
1189. Oh, fuck me, man.Copy !req
1190. That kid's already spent
all the money, man.Copy !req
1191. New Vette? Hardly, Dude.Copy !req
1192. I'd say he still has $960,000, $970,000
left, depending on the options.Copy !req
1193. Wait in the car, Donny.Copy !req
1194. Yes? Pilar?Copy !req
1195. My name is Walter Sobchak. This is
my associate, Jeffrey Lebowski.Copy !req
1196. We came to talk about little Larry.Copy !req
1197. May we come in? Yes, yes.Copy !req
1198. Thank you.Copy !req
1199. That's him, Dude.Copy !req
1200. And a good day to you, sir!Copy !req
1201. Sit down, please.Copy !req
1202. Larry, sweetie, the man is here!Copy !req
1203. Is he... Does he still write?Copy !req
1204. Oh, no, no. He has health problems.Copy !req
1205. Uh-huh.Copy !req
1206. Sir, I just want to sayCopy !req
1207. that we're both, on a personal level,Copy !req
1208. really enormous fans.Copy !req
1209. Branded, especially the early episodes,Copy !req
1210. was truly a source of inspiration.Copy !req
1211. Sweetie, sit down.
This man is the police.Copy !req
1212. Oh, no, ma'am. We didn't want to give the
impression that we were police, exactly.Copy !req
1213. We're hoping it won't be
necessary to call the police.Copy !req
1214. But that's up to little Larry here.Copy !req
1215. Isn't it, Larry?Copy !req
1216. Is this your homework, Larry?Copy !req
1217. Is this your homework, Larry?
Look, man, it...Copy !req
1218. Dude. Please? Is this your homework, Larry?Copy !req
1219. Just ask him about the car, man.Copy !req
1220. Is this yours, Larry? Is
this your homework, Larry?Copy !req
1221. Is that your car out front?Copy !req
1222. Is this your homework, Larry? We
know it's his fucking homework!Copy !req
1223. Where's the fucking money, you little brat?Copy !req
1224. Look, Larry, have you
ever heard of Vietnam?Copy !req
1225. For Christ's sake, Walter. You are
entering a world of pain, son.Copy !req
1226. We know that this is your homework.
We know that you stole the car.Copy !req
1227. And the fucking money.
And the fucking money!Copy !req
1228. And we know that this is your homework!Copy !req
1229. We're gonna cut your dick off, Larry.Copy !req
1230. You're killing your father, Larry.Copy !req
1231. All right. This is pointless.Copy !req
1232. Okay, time for Plan B.Copy !req
1233. You might want to watch out
that front window, Larry.Copy !req
1234. Son, this is what happens when
you fuck a stranger in the ass!Copy !req
1235. A little language problem here.Copy !req
1236. Little prick's stonewalling me.Copy !req
1237. Walter.Copy !req
1238. What are you doing, man?Copy !req
1239. What are you doing?Copy !req
1240. Here you go, Larry.Copy !req
1241. You see what happens?Copy !req
1242. You see what happens, Larry?Copy !req
1243. You see what happens? Oh, great.Copy !req
1244. This is what happens when you fuck
a stranger in the ass, Larry.Copy !req
1245. This is what happens, Larry.Copy !req
1246. You see what happens, Larry?Copy !req
1247. You see what happens when you
fuck a stranger in the ass?Copy !req
1248. This is what happens!Copy !req
1249. You see what happens, Larry?Copy !req
1250. Do you see what happens, Larry, when
you fuck a stranger in the ass?Copy !req
1251. This is what happens, Larry!Copy !req
1252. My car! My baby! This
is what happens, Larry!Copy !req
1253. This is what happens when
you fuck a stranger...Copy !req
1254. What the fuck are you doing, man? Stop it!Copy !req
1255. Hey, man. I just bought
that fucking car last week!Copy !req
1256. Whoa, whoa, whoa! I'm sorry!
I'm gonna fucking kill you!Copy !req
1257. I just bought the fucking car last week!
Come on, man.Copy !req
1258. I'll kill your fucking car, man!Copy !req
1259. No, no. Hey, hey, that's not his! Hey!Copy !req
1260. God damn it! Whoa! Oh, no!Copy !req
1261. Fuck you! Man. No.Copy !req
1262. You like that? Fuck you!Copy !req
1263. - I'll kill your fucking car!
- No. No, no. No.Copy !req
1264. I'll kill your fucking car!Copy !req
1265. I accept your apology.Copy !req
1266. No, I just want to handle
it by myself from now on.Copy !req
1267. No. No. No!Copy !req
1268. That has nothing to do with it.Copy !req
1269. Yes, the car made it home.
You're calling me at home.Copy !req
1270. No, Walter, it did not look
like Larry was about to crack!Copy !req
1271. Well, that's your perception.Copy !req
1272. You know, Walter, you're right.Copy !req
1273. There is an unspoken message here.Copy !req
1274. It's, "Fuck you! Leave me the fuck alone!"Copy !req
1275. Yeah, I'll be at practice.Copy !req
1276. Pin your diapers on, Lebowski.Copy !req
1277. Jackie Treehorn wants to see you.Copy !req
1278. Jackie Treehorn knows which
Lebowski you are, Lebowski.Copy !req
1279. Jackie Treehorn wants to
see the deadbeat Lebowski.Copy !req
1280. You're not dealing with morons here.Copy !req
1281. Hello, Dude. Thanks for coming.Copy !req
1282. I'm Jackie Treehorn.Copy !req
1283. This is quite a pad you got here, man.Copy !req
1284. Completely unspoiled.Copy !req
1285. What's your drink, Dude?
A White Russian. Thanks.Copy !req
1286. White Russian.Copy !req
1287. How's the smut business, Jackie?
I wouldn't know, Dude.Copy !req
1288. I deal in publishing,
entertainment, political advocacy.Copy !req
1289. Which one's Logjammin'? Yes,
regrettably, it's true.Copy !req
1290. Standards have fallen
in adult entertainment.Copy !req
1291. It's video, Dude.Copy !req
1292. Now that we're competing
with those amateurs,Copy !req
1293. we can't afford to invest in
little extras like story,Copy !req
1294. production value, feelings.Copy !req
1295. You know, people forget that the
brain is the biggest erogenous zone.Copy !req
1296. On you maybe.Copy !req
1297. Of course, you have to take
the good with the bad.Copy !req
1298. New technology permits us
to do very exciting thingsCopy !req
1299. in interactive erotic software.Copy !req
1300. Wave of the future, Dude. 100% electronic.Copy !req
1301. Well, I still jerk off manually.Copy !req
1302. Of course you do. I can see you're
anxious for me to get to the point.Copy !req
1303. Well, here it is, Dude.Copy !req
1304. Where's Bunny?Copy !req
1305. Well, I thought you might know that, man.
Why would I?Copy !req
1306. She only ran off to get away from
that rather sizable debt to me.Copy !req
1307. No, she didn't run off. She's been...Copy !req
1308. I heard that kidnapping story, so save it.Copy !req
1309. I know you're mixed up in all this, Dude.Copy !req
1310. And I don't care what you're
trying to get from the husband.Copy !req
1311. That's your business.Copy !req
1312. All I'm saying is I want mine.Copy !req
1313. Yeah, right, man.Copy !req
1314. I mean, there are a lot of facets to this,Copy !req
1315. a lot
of interested parties.Copy !req
1316. Excuse me.Copy !req
1317. Yeah?Copy !req
1318. Oh, yeah?Copy !req
1319. Where is that?Copy !req
1320. All right. Yeah.Copy !req
1321. Excuse me.Copy !req
1322. Forgive me. No problemo, man.Copy !req
1323. So, if I can find your money,Copy !req
1324. what's in it for the Dude?Copy !req
1325. Well, of course, there's that to discuss.
You want a refill?Copy !req
1326. Yeah, does the pope shit in the woods?
10% finder's fee.Copy !req
1327. That all right? Okay. Done, Jackie.Copy !req
1328. I dig the way you do business, man.Copy !req
1329. Your money is being held by
a kid named Larry Sellers.Copy !req
1330. He lives in North Hollywood on Radford,Copy !req
1331. by the In-N-Out Burger.Copy !req
1332. Fucking brat.Copy !req
1333. But I'm sure your goons can get it off him.
I mean, he's 15.Copy !req
1334. Flunking social studies.Copy !req
1335. So, if you could justCopy !req
1336. write me a check for my
10% of half a million,Copy !req
1337. 5 grand, I'll go out and mingle.Copy !req
1338. You mix a hell of a Caucasian, Jackie.Copy !req
1339. Fifteen-year-old kid.Copy !req
1340. Is this some sort of a joke? No. No joke.Copy !req
1341. No funny stuff, Jackie. The kid's got it.Copy !req
1342. Hi, fellas.Copy !req
1343. Kid just wanted a car.Copy !req
1344. All the Dude ever wanted was his rug back.Copy !req
1345. Not greedy.Copy !req
1346. It reallyCopy !req
1347. tied the room together.Copy !req
1348. Darkness washed over the Dude.Copy !req
1349. Darker than a black steer's tokus
on a moonless prairie night.Copy !req
1350. There was no bottom.Copy !req
1351. Yeah, yeah, oh, yeahCopy !req
1352. What condition my condition was inCopy !req
1353. I woke up this morning with
the sundown shining inCopy !req
1354. I found my mind in a brown paper bag withinCopy !req
1355. I tripped on a cloud and
fell-a eight miles highCopy !req
1356. I tore my mind on a jagged skyCopy !req
1357. I just dropped inCopy !req
1358. To see what condition my condition was inCopy !req
1359. Yeah, yeah, oh, yeahCopy !req
1360. What condition my condition was inCopy !req
1361. I pushed my soul in a deep, dark holeCopy !req
1362. And then I followed it inCopy !req
1363. I watched myself crawlin' outCopy !req
1364. As I was a-crawlin' inCopy !req
1365. I got up so tightCopy !req
1366. I couldn't unwindCopy !req
1367. I saw so much I broke my mindCopy !req
1368. I just dropped inCopy !req
1369. To see what condition my condition was inCopy !req
1370. Yeah, yeah, oh, yeahCopy !req
1371. What condition my condition was inCopy !req
1372. Someone painted "April Fool"Copy !req
1373. In big, black letters on a "Dead End" signCopy !req
1374. I had my foot on the gas as I left the roadCopy !req
1375. And blew out my mindCopy !req
1376. Eight miles out of Memphis
and I got no spareCopy !req
1377. Eight miles straight up downtown somewhereCopy !req
1378. I just dropped inCopy !req
1379. To see what condition my condition was inCopy !req
1380. I said I just dropped inCopy !req
1381. To see what condition my condition was inCopy !req
1382. Yeah, yeahCopy !req
1383. Oh, yeahCopy !req
1384. He was innocentCopy !req
1385. Not a charge was trueCopy !req
1386. And they say he ran away brandedCopy !req
1387. Is this your only ID?Copy !req
1388. I know my rights, man.Copy !req
1389. You don't know shit, Lebowski.Copy !req
1390. I want a fucking lawyer, man.Copy !req
1391. I want Bill Kunstler, man,Copy !req
1392. or Ron Kuby.Copy !req
1393. Mr. Treehorn tells us
that he had to eject youCopy !req
1394. from his garden party,Copy !req
1395. that you were drunk and abusive.Copy !req
1396. Mr. Treehorn treats
objects like women, man.Copy !req
1397. Mr. Treehorn draws a lot
of water in this town.Copy !req
1398. You don't draw shit, Lebowski.Copy !req
1399. Now, we got a nice quiet
little beach community here,Copy !req
1400. and I aim to keep it nice and quiet.Copy !req
1401. So let me make something plain.Copy !req
1402. I don't like you sucking around
bothering our citizens, Lebowski.Copy !req
1403. I don't like your jerk-off name.Copy !req
1404. I don't like your jerk-off face.Copy !req
1405. I don't like your jerk-off behavior.Copy !req
1406. And I don't like you, jerk-off.Copy !req
1407. Do I make myself clear?Copy !req
1408. I'm sorry. I wasn't listening.Copy !req
1409. Ow!Copy !req
1410. Fucking fascist!Copy !req
1411. Stay out of Malibu, Lebowski.Copy !req
1412. Stay out of Malibu, deadbeat!Copy !req
1413. Keep your ugly, fucking, gold-bricking
ass out of my beach community.Copy !req
1414. I want to sleep with youCopy !req
1415. In the desert tonightCopy !req
1416. With a billion stars all aroundCopy !req
1417. Jesus, man. Could you change the channel?Copy !req
1418. Fuck you, man! If you don't
like my fucking music,Copy !req
1419. get your own fucking cab!Copy !req
1420. I had a really rough...Copy !req
1421. I'll pull off to the side
and kick your ass out.Copy !req
1422. Man, come on. I had a rough night,
and I hate the fucking Eagles, man.Copy !req
1423. Out of my fucking cab! Out! Man!Copy !req
1424. Man! Man! Hey!Copy !req
1425. There's a thousand
pretty women waiting out thereCopy !req
1426. And they're all livin' devil may careCopy !req
1427. And I'm just the devil with love to spareCopy !req
1428. So viva Las VegasCopy !req
1429. Viva Las VegasCopy !req
1430. Oh, Jesus!Copy !req
1431. Jeffrey.Copy !req
1432. Maude? Love me.Copy !req
1433. That's my robe.Copy !req
1434. Tell me about yourself, Jeffrey.Copy !req
1435. Well, not much to tell.Copy !req
1436. I was one of the authors of
the Port Huron Statement.Copy !req
1437. The original Port Huron Statement. Uh-huh.Copy !req
1438. Not the compromised second draft.Copy !req
1439. Then I...Copy !req
1440. You ever hear of the Seattle Seven?Copy !req
1441. That was me.Copy !req
1442. And there were six other guys.Copy !req
1443. And then the music business, briefly.Copy !req
1444. Oh? Yeah.Copy !req
1445. Roadie for Metallica.Copy !req
1446. Oh.Copy !req
1447. Speed of Sound tour.Copy !req
1448. Mmm-hmm.Copy !req
1449. Bunch of assholes.Copy !req
1450. And then, you know, little
of this, little of that.Copy !req
1451. My career's slowed down a little lately.Copy !req
1452. What do you do for recreation?Copy !req
1453. Well, the usual.Copy !req
1454. Bowl, drive around,Copy !req
1455. the occasional acid flashback.Copy !req
1456. What happened to your house?Copy !req
1457. Oh, Jackie Treehorn trashed the place.Copy !req
1458. He thought I had your father's money.Copy !req
1459. He got me out of the way
while he looked for it.Copy !req
1460. Cocktail? No, thanks.Copy !req
1461. It's not my father's money.
It's the foundation's.Copy !req
1462. Why did he think you have it? Who does?Copy !req
1463. Oh, Larry Sellers, this high school kid.
Real fucking brat.Copy !req
1464. You know, this is a very
complicated case, Maude.Copy !req
1465. A lot of ins, a lot of outs.Copy !req
1466. You know, fortunately, I'm adhering
to a pretty strict, drug regimenCopy !req
1467. to keep my mind, you know, limber,Copy !req
1468. and I'm very fucking close
to your father's money.Copy !req
1469. I keep telling you, it's
the foundation's money.Copy !req
1470. Father doesn't have any.Copy !req
1471. What are you talking about?
He's fucking loaded.Copy !req
1472. No, no. The wealth is all Mother's.Copy !req
1473. No, he runs stuff.Copy !req
1474. We did let him run one of
the companies briefly,Copy !req
1475. but he didn't do very well at it.
Oh, he's, you know...Copy !req
1476. No, he helps administer the charities now,Copy !req
1477. and I give him a reasonable allowance.Copy !req
1478. He has no money of his own.Copy !req
1479. I know how he likes to present himself.Copy !req
1480. Father's weakness is
vanity, hence the slut.Copy !req
1481. Do you think he...Copy !req
1482. What is that, yoga?Copy !req
1483. It increases the chances of conception.Copy !req
1484. increases... Well, yes.Copy !req
1485. What did you think this was all about?
Fun and games?Copy !req
1486. I want a child.Copy !req
1487. Okay, yeah, okay.Copy !req
1488. But let me... Let me explain
something about the Dude.Copy !req
1489. Look, Jeffrey, I don't want a partner.Copy !req
1490. In fact, I don't want the father to
be someone I have to see sociallyCopy !req
1491. or who will have any interest
in raising the child himself.Copy !req
1492. Oh. So, that doctor... Exactly.Copy !req
1493. Now, what happened to your face?Copy !req
1494. Did Jackie Treehorn do that as well?Copy !req
1495. No, it was the chief of police
of Malibu, a real reactionary.Copy !req
1496. So, your father...Copy !req
1497. Oh, yeah, I get it. Yeah. Yeah. What?Copy !req
1498. Oh, man. My thinking about this
case has become very uptight.Copy !req
1499. Yeah.Copy !req
1500. Your father.Copy !req
1501. Jeffrey, what are you talking about?Copy !req
1502. Jeffrey!Copy !req
1503. Walter, if you're there, pick
up the fucking phone, man.Copy !req
1504. Come on, Walter.Copy !req
1505. Pick it up, man. This is an emergency.
Dude? Dude?Copy !req
1506. Yeah. Listen, Walter. I'm at my place.
I need you to come pick me up.Copy !req
1507. I can't drive, Dude.
It's Erev shabbos. What?Copy !req
1508. Erev shabbos. What?Copy !req
1509. Erev shabbos. I can't drive. Man!Copy !req
1510. I'm not even supposed to pick up the
phone unless it's an emergency.Copy !req
1511. This is a fucking emergency! I understand.Copy !req
1512. That's why I picked up the phone.Copy !req
1513. Walter, you fuck. We gotta
go to Pasadena, man.Copy !req
1514. Come pick me up or I'm off
the fucking bowling team.Copy !req
1515. Get out of that fucking car, man!Copy !req
1516. Get out of that fucking car!Copy !req
1517. Get the fuck out of the car, man.Copy !req
1518. Get out of the fucking...Copy !req
1519. Who the fuck are you, man? Easy, man!Copy !req
1520. Relax, man.Copy !req
1521. No physical harm intended.Copy !req
1522. Who the fuck are you? Why
you following me around?Copy !req
1523. Come on, fuckhead! Relax, man.
I'm a brother shamus.Copy !req
1524. Brother Shamus?Copy !req
1525. Like an Irish monk?Copy !req
1526. What the fuck are you talking about?Copy !req
1527. My name is Da Fino. I'm a
private snoop, like you, man.Copy !req
1528. What? A dick, man.Copy !req
1529. And let me tell you
something, I dig your work.Copy !req
1530. Playing one side against the
other, in bed with everybody.Copy !req
1531. Fabulous stuff, man. I'm not...Copy !req
1532. Fuck it, man. Just stay away
from my fucking lady friend.Copy !req
1533. Hey, I'm not messing
with your special lady.Copy !req
1534. She's not my special lady.
She's my fucking lady friend.Copy !req
1535. I'm just helping her conceive, man!
Hey, man. I'm not...Copy !req
1536. Who are you working for? Lebowski?Copy !req
1537. Jackie Treehorn?Copy !req
1538. The Kneutsons.Copy !req
1539. Who the fuck are the Kneutsons?Copy !req
1540. The Kneutsons, it's a
wandering daughter job.Copy !req
1541. Bunny Lebowski, man.Copy !req
1542. Her real name is Fawn Kneutson.Copy !req
1543. Her parents want her back, see?Copy !req
1544. Jesus fucking Christ.Copy !req
1545. Crazy, huh? Ran away about a year ago.Copy !req
1546. The Kneutsons told me I should
show her this when I found her.Copy !req
1547. It's the family farm. It's
outside Moorhead, Minnesota.Copy !req
1548. They think it'll make her homesick.
Oh, boy.Copy !req
1549. How are you gonna keep
them down on the farmCopy !req
1550. once they've seen Karl Hungus?Copy !req
1551. She's been kidnapped, Da Fino. Oh, man.Copy !req
1552. Or I don't know. Maybe not.Copy !req
1553. But she's definitely not around.Copy !req
1554. Hey, maybe you and me
could pool our resources,Copy !req
1555. trade information.Copy !req
1556. Professional courtesy?Copy !req
1557. Compeers. You know what I mean?Copy !req
1558. Yeah, yeah, I get it. Fuck off, Da Fino.Copy !req
1559. And stay away from my special...Copy !req
1560. From my fucking lady friend, man!Copy !req
1561. The lingonberry pancake.Copy !req
1562. Lingonberry pancakes.Copy !req
1563. Three pigs in blanket.Copy !req
1564. She has lingonberry pancakes.Copy !req
1565. I mean, we totally fucked it up, man.
We fucked up his payoff.Copy !req
1566. We got the kidnappers all pissed off.Copy !req
1567. And Lebowski, you know,
he yelled at me a lot,Copy !req
1568. but he didn't do anything, huh?Copy !req
1569. Well, sometimes it's a cathartic... No, no.Copy !req
1570. I'm saying that if he knows I'm a fuckup,Copy !req
1571. why does he leave me in charge
of getting his wife back?Copy !req
1572. Because he doesn't
fucking want her back, man.Copy !req
1573. He's had enough. He no longer digs her.
It's all a show.Copy !req
1574. Okay, but then why doesn't he give
a shit about his million bucks?Copy !req
1575. I mean, he knows we never
handed off his briefcase,Copy !req
1576. but he
never asked for it back.Copy !req
1577. The million bucks was
never in the briefcase.Copy !req
1578. The briefcase was fucking empty, man.Copy !req
1579. The asshole was hoping
that they would kill her.Copy !req
1580. You threw out a ringer for a ringer.Copy !req
1581. Okay, but how does all this
add up to an emergency?Copy !req
1582. I'm saying, I see what you're getting at, Dude.
He kept the money.Copy !req
1583. My point is...Copy !req
1584. Here we are, it's shabbos, the Sabbath,Copy !req
1585. which I'm allowed to break only if
it's a matter of life or death.Copy !req
1586. Will you come off it, Walter? You're
not even fucking Jewish, man.Copy !req
1587. What the fuck are you talking about?Copy !req
1588. Man, you're fucking Polish Catholic!Copy !req
1589. What the fuck are you talking about?Copy !req
1590. I converted when I married Cynthia.
Come on, Dude.Copy !req
1591. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. You know this.Copy !req
1592. And five fucking years
ago, you were divorced.Copy !req
1593. So what are you saying?
When you get divorced,Copy !req
1594. you turn in your library card?
You get a new license?Copy !req
1595. You stop being Jewish?
This is the driveway.Copy !req
1596. Jewish as fucking Tevye. Man.Copy !req
1597. You know, it's all a part
of your sick Cynthia thing.Copy !req
1598. Man, taking care of her fucking dog,
going to her fucking synagogue.Copy !req
1599. You're living in the fucking past.Copy !req
1600. Three thousand years of beautiful
tradition, from Moses to Sandy Koufax.Copy !req
1601. You're goddamn right I'm
living in the fucking past!Copy !req
1602. I've... Jesus.Copy !req
1603. What the hell happened?Copy !req
1604. So viva Las VegasCopy !req
1605. Viva Las VegasCopy !req
1606. Let's go. Fuck it.Copy !req
1607. Where was she, man?Copy !req
1608. Visiting friends of hers in Palm Springs.Copy !req
1609. She just picked up and left,
never bothered to tell us.Copy !req
1610. Well, I guess the fucking
nihilists knew where she was.Copy !req
1611. Jesus, Dude. She never
even kidnapped herself.Copy !req
1612. Who is this gentleman, Dude? Who am I?
I'm a fucking veteran.Copy !req
1613. Come on! That's who I am.Copy !req
1614. You shouldn't go in there, Dude.
He's very angry.Copy !req
1615. So, man.Copy !req
1616. So? She's back, no thanks to you.Copy !req
1617. Where's the fucking money, Lebowski?Copy !req
1618. A million bucks from fucking,
needy, little Urban Achievers!Copy !req
1619. You are scum, man!Copy !req
1620. Who the hell is he? Who am I? Who am I?Copy !req
1621. Walter. I'm the guy that's
gonna kick your phony,Copy !req
1622. gold-bricking ass, that's who I am. Man.Copy !req
1623. We know the briefcase was fucking empty.Copy !req
1624. We know you kept the million
bucks for yourself.Copy !req
1625. You have your story, I have mine.Copy !req
1626. I say I entrusted the money
to you and you stole it.Copy !req
1627. As if we would ever dream of
taking your bullshit money!Copy !req
1628. You thought that Bunny had been kidnapped,Copy !req
1629. and you were fucking glad, man.Copy !req
1630. You could use it as an excuse
to make some money disappear.Copy !req
1631. All you needed was a sap to pin it on.
You just met me.Copy !req
1632. You... You human paraquat.Copy !req
1633. You figured, "Oh, here's a
loser, you know, a deadbeat.Copy !req
1634. "Somebody this square community
won't give a shit about."Copy !req
1635. Well, aren't you?Copy !req
1636. Well, yeah, but... Get out, both of you.Copy !req
1637. Look at that fucking phony, Dude,
pretending to be a fucking millionaire.Copy !req
1638. Out of this house now, you bums!Copy !req
1639. Let me tell you something else.Copy !req
1640. I've seen a lot of spinals,
Dude, and this guy's a fake.Copy !req
1641. A fucking gold-bricker.
Stay away from me, mister!Copy !req
1642. This guy fucking walks.Copy !req
1643. I've never been more certain
of anything in my life.Copy !req
1644. You stay away from me!Copy !req
1645. Walter, for Christ's sake, man!
He's a cripple.Copy !req
1646. I said! Get away from me! Come on. Come on.Copy !req
1647. Yeah, I'll put him down, Dude.
Walk! Achtung, baby!Copy !req
1648. Come on, man. Help me put
him back in his chair.Copy !req
1649. At least they had the
fucking decency to tell usCopy !req
1650. that we were fighting the communists.Copy !req
1651. Whereas this whole fucking
thing, this whole fucking thingCopy !req
1652. is nothing about nothing, about oil,Copy !req
1653. which is what I personally hear, Dude.Copy !req
1654. Sure you'll see some tank battles,Copy !req
1655. but fighting in desert is very different
from fighting in canopy jungle.Copy !req
1656. I mean, Nam was a foot soldier's
war, whereas this thing should...Copy !req
1657. You know, should be a piece of cake.Copy !req
1658. I mean, I had an M16, Jacko,
not an Abrams fucking tank.Copy !req
1659. Me and Charlie, eyeball to eyeball. Yeah.Copy !req
1660. That's fucking combat.Copy !req
1661. The man in the black pajamas, Dude.Copy !req
1662. Worthy fucking adversary.Copy !req
1663. Who's in pajamas, Walter?
Shut the fuck up, Donny.Copy !req
1664. Whereas what we have here,Copy !req
1665. a bunch of fig eaters wearing
towels on their head,Copy !req
1666. trying to find reverse on a Soviet tank.Copy !req
1667. - This is not a worthy fucking adversary.
- Hey!Copy !req
1668. What's this day-of-rest shit?Copy !req
1669. What's this bullshit?Copy !req
1670. I don't fucking care! It
don't matter to Jesus.Copy !req
1671. But you not fooling me, man.Copy !req
1672. You might fool the fucks
in the league officeCopy !req
1673. but you don't fool Jesus.Copy !req
1674. It's Bush league psych-out stuff.Copy !req
1675. Laughable, man!Copy !req
1676. I would've fucked you in the ass Saturday.Copy !req
1677. I'll fuck you in the ass
next Wednesday instead.Copy !req
1678. You got a date Wednesday, baby!Copy !req
1679. He's cracking.Copy !req
1680. the whole concept of age.Copy !req
1681. I mean, many learned men have disputed thisCopy !req
1682. but in the 14th century, the Rambam...Copy !req
1683. Well, they finally did it.Copy !req
1684. They killed my fucking car.Copy !req
1685. We want the money, Lebowski.Copy !req
1686. Ja. Otherwise, we kill the girl.Copy !req
1687. Ja. It seems you have forgotten
our little deal, Lebowski.Copy !req
1688. You don't have the fucking girl, dipshit.Copy !req
1689. We know you never did.Copy !req
1690. Are these the Nazis, Walter?Copy !req
1691. No, Donny. These men are nihilists.Copy !req
1692. There's nothing to be afraid of.Copy !req
1693. We don't care.Copy !req
1694. We still want the money,
Lebowski, or we fuck you up.Copy !req
1695. Fuck you. Fuck the three of you.
Cool it, Walter.Copy !req
1696. No. Without a hostage, there is no ransom.Copy !req
1697. That's what ransom is. Those
are the fucking rules.Copy !req
1698. His girlfriend gave up her toe.Copy !req
1699. She thought we could get $1 million.Copy !req
1700. It's not fair. Fair?Copy !req
1701. Who's the fucking nihilists around
here, you bunch of fucking crybabies?Copy !req
1702. Cool it, Walter. Hey, look, pal.Copy !req
1703. There never was any money.Copy !req
1704. The big Lebowski gave
me an empty briefcase,Copy !req
1705. so take it up with him, man.Copy !req
1706. And I would like my undies back.Copy !req
1707. Are these guys gonna hurt us, Walter?Copy !req
1708. No, Donny. These men are cowards.Copy !req
1709. Okay!Copy !req
1710. So we takes the money you have
on you, and we calls it even.Copy !req
1711. Fuck you. Hey, no. Come on, Walter.Copy !req
1712. Come on, we're ending
this thing cheap, man.Copy !req
1713. No. What's mine is mine.
No, come on, Walter.Copy !req
1714. No funny stuff. All right. All right.Copy !req
1715. No funny stuff. I got 4 bucks, almost 5.Copy !req
1716. I got $18. What's mine is mine.Copy !req
1717. We fuck you up, man! We takes the money!Copy !req
1718. Come and get it.Copy !req
1719. We fuck you up! Show me
what you got, nihilists.Copy !req
1720. I fuck you! Walter, come on.
He's got a sword.Copy !req
1721. Fucking dipshit with a nine-toed woman!Copy !req
1722. I fuck you! Fuck you! I fuck you!Copy !req
1723. Take it easy, man. I fuck you!Copy !req
1724. Take the $4. I fuck you!Copy !req
1725. I fuck you!Copy !req
1726. I'm gonna hit you with
the fucking ball, man.Copy !req
1727. Hey, dickhead! Anti-Semite.Copy !req
1728. I fuck you in the ass!
I fuck you in the ass!Copy !req
1729. I fuck you! I fuck you!Copy !req
1730. We got a man down, Dude!Copy !req
1731. Oh, God. They shot him, man.Copy !req
1732. He's not shot. No, Dude.
Are you shot, Donny?Copy !req
1733. There weren't any shots fired. Huh?Copy !req
1734. It's a heart attack. Call the medics, Dude.Copy !req
1735. I'd go myself, but I'm pumping
blood, might pass out.Copy !req
1736. Rest easy, good buddy. You're doing fine.Copy !req
1737. We got help choppering in.Copy !req
1738. Hello, gentlemen.Copy !req
1739. You are the bereaved? Yeah, man.Copy !req
1740. Francis Donnelly, pleased to meet you.Copy !req
1741. Jeff Lebowski. Walter Sobchak.Copy !req
1742. The Dude actually is...Copy !req
1743. Excuse me? Oh, nothing.Copy !req
1744. Yes. I understand you're
taking away the remains?Copy !req
1745. Yeah.Copy !req
1746. We have the urn.Copy !req
1747. I assume this is credit card?Copy !req
1748. Yeah.Copy !req
1749. What's this?Copy !req
1750. Now, that's for the urn.Copy !req
1751. Don't need it. We're scattering the ashes.Copy !req
1752. Yes. So we were informed.Copy !req
1753. However, we must, of course,
transmit the remains to youCopy !req
1754. in a receptacle.Copy !req
1755. That's $180.Copy !req
1756. It is our most modestly priced receptacle.Copy !req
1757. Well, can't we just... $180?Copy !req
1758. They range up to $3,000.Copy !req
1759. We're... Can't we just rent
it from you, you know?Copy !req
1760. Sir, this is a mortuary not a rental house.Copy !req
1761. We're scattering the fucking ashes!
Walter, Walter.Copy !req
1762. Just because we're bereaved
doesn't make us saps.Copy !req
1763. Sir, please lower your voices.Copy !req
1764. Man, don't you have, you know,
something else we can put him in?Copy !req
1765. You know?Copy !req
1766. That is our most modestly
priced receptacle.Copy !req
1767. God damn it!Copy !req
1768. Is there a Ralph's around here?Copy !req
1769. Donny was a good bowler and a good man.Copy !req
1770. He was one of us.Copy !req
1771. He was a man who loved the
outdoors and bowling.Copy !req
1772. And as a surfer he explored the
beaches of Southern CaliforniaCopy !req
1773. from La Jolla to Leo CarrilloCopy !req
1774. and up to Pismo.Copy !req
1775. He died...Copy !req
1776. He died as so many young men of
his generation, before his time.Copy !req
1777. In your wisdom, Lord, you took him,Copy !req
1778. as you took so many bright,
flowering young menCopy !req
1779. at Khe Sanh, at Ian Doc,Copy !req
1780. at Hill 364.Copy !req
1781. These young men gave their lives,Copy !req
1782. and so did Donny.Copy !req
1783. Donny, who loved bowling.Copy !req
1784. And so,Copy !req
1785. Theodore Donald Kerabatsos,Copy !req
1786. in accordance with what we think your
dying wishes might well have been,Copy !req
1787. we commit your final mortal remainsCopy !req
1788. to the bosom of the Pacific OceanCopy !req
1789. which you loved so well.Copy !req
1790. Good night, sweet prince.Copy !req
1791. Shit.Copy !req
1792. Oh, shit, Dude. I'm sorry.Copy !req
1793. Goddamn wind. Fuck, god damn it, Walter!Copy !req
1794. You fucking asshole! Shit, Dude. I'm sorry.Copy !req
1795. Everything's a fucking
travesty with you, man!Copy !req
1796. I'm sorry. It was an accident.Copy !req
1797. What was that shit about Vietnam?
Dude, I'm sorry.Copy !req
1798. What the fuck does anything
have to do with Vietnam?Copy !req
1799. Dude, I'm sorry. What the
fuck are you talking about?Copy !req
1800. Dude, I'm sorry.Copy !req
1801. Fucking...Copy !req
1802. Fuck, Walter.Copy !req
1803. Come on, Dude.Copy !req
1804. Hey, fuck it, man.Copy !req
1805. Let's go bowling.Copy !req
1806. And when you're sittin' thereCopy !req
1807. In your silk upholstered chairCopy !req
1808. Talkin' to some rich folks that you knowCopy !req
1809. Well, I hope you don't see meCopy !req
1810. In my ragged companyCopy !req
1811. Oh, but you know I could never be aloneCopy !req
1812. Two oat sodas, Gary. Right.
Good luck tomorrow.Copy !req
1813. Yeah, thanks, man. I was
sorry to hear about Donny.Copy !req
1814. Oh, yeah. Well, you know,Copy !req
1815. sometimes you eat the bear,
and sometimes, you know...Copy !req
1816. Hey, man.Copy !req
1817. How do you do, Dude? I
wondered if I'd see you again.Copy !req
1818. I wouldn't miss the semis.Copy !req
1819. Oh, yeah? How's things been going?Copy !req
1820. Well, you know, strikes and
gutters, ups and downs.Copy !req
1821. Sure. I got you. Yeah.Copy !req
1822. Thanks, Gary.Copy !req
1823. Well, take care, man. Gotta get back.Copy !req
1824. Sure. Take it easy, Dude. Oh, yeah.Copy !req
1825. I know that you will.Copy !req
1826. Yeah. Well, the Dude abides.Copy !req
1827. Walter.Copy !req
1828. The Dude abides.Copy !req
1829. I don't know about you, but
I take comfort in that.Copy !req
1830. It's good knowing he's out there,Copy !req
1831. the Dude, taking her
easy for all us sinners.Copy !req
1832. I sure hope he makes the finals.Copy !req
1833. Well, that about does her.Copy !req
1834. Wraps her all up.Copy !req
1835. Things seem to have worked out
pretty good for the Dude and Walter.Copy !req
1836. And it was a pretty good
story, don't you think?Copy !req
1837. Made me laugh to beat the band.Copy !req
1838. Parts anyway.Copy !req
1839. I didn't like seeing Donny go.Copy !req
1840. But then I happen to know that there's
a little Lebowski on the way.Copy !req
1841. I guess that's the way the whole
darned human comedy keepsCopy !req
1842. perpetuating itselfCopy !req
1843. down through the generations.Copy !req
1844. Westward the wagons, across
the sands of time until we...Copy !req
1845. Oh, look at me. I'm rambling again.Copy !req
1846. Well, I hope you folks enjoyed yourselves.Copy !req
1847. Catch you later on down the trail.Copy !req
1848. Say, friend, you got any more
of that good sarsaparilla?Copy !req