1. Colm?
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2. Are you coming out to the pub, Colm?
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3. It's 2:00, like.
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4. Will I see you down there, so?
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5. I'll see you down there, so.
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6. What are you doin' home?
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7. Brother?
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8. What are you doin' home?
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9. I knocked on ColmSonnyLarry.
He's just sitting there.
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10. Sitting there doin' what?
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11. Sittin' there doin' nothing.
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12. Smoking.
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13. Was he asleep?
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14. He was smoking, Siobhán.
How do you smoke in your sleep, like?
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15. Have ye been rowing?
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16. We haven't been rowin'.
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17. I don't think we've been rowin'.
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18. Have we been rowin'?
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19. Why wouldn't he answer the door to me?
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20. Maybe he just doesn't like you no more.
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21. Pint, Jonjo.
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22. Is Colm not with you?
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23. - No.
- Colm's always with you.
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24. - I know.
- Did you not knock for him?
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25. I did knock for him.
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26. - Well, where is he?
- Just sittin' there.
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27. Sittin' there doin' what?
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28. Sittin' there doing nothin'.
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29. Smokin'.
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30. Have ye been rowin'?
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31. I don't think we've been rowin'.
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32. Sounds like ye've been rowin'.
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33. It does sound like we've been rowin'.
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34. Will I try him again?
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35. That'd be the best thing.
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36. Officer Kearney.
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37. Never says "hello."
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38. Never fecking says "hello."
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39. Colm?
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40. Colm?
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41. The door was open, Colm.
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42. Colm?
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43. Where the hell are you headin' off to?
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44. - Everybody?
- No, this is true.
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45. He scored six points from open play.
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46. He was barely the size of a dwarf!
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47. This is true!
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48. - Howdo.
- Howdo, Pádraic.
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49. Sit somewhere else.
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50. Huh?
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51. Uh... But I have me pint there, Colm.
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52. He has his pint there, Colm,
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53. from when he came in
and ordered his pint before.
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54. Okay.
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55. I'll sit somewhere else, so.
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56. Are ye rowin'?
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57. I didn't think we were rowin'.
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58. Well, ye are rowin'.
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59. Well, ye are rowin'. He's sittin' outside
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60. on his own like a whatchamacallit.
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61. It does look like we're rowin'.
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62. Well, I suppose
I'd best go talk to him, so.
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63. See what all this is fecking about.
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64. That'd be the best thing.
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65. Now I'm sittin' here next to you,
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66. and if you're goin' back inside,
I'm followin' you inside,
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67. and if you're goin' home,
I'm followin' you there, too.
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68. Now, if I've done somethin' to ya,
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69. just tell me what I've done to ya.
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70. And if I've said somethin' to ya,
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71. maybe I said somethin' when I was drunk,
and I've forgotten it,
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72. but I don't think I said somethin'
when I was drunk, and I've forgotten it.
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73. But if I did, then tell me what it was,
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74. and I'll say sorry for that too, Colm.
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75. With all me heart,
I'll say sorry.
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76. Just stop running away from me
like some fool of a moody schoolchild.
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77. But you didn't say anything to me.
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78. And you didn't do anything to me.
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79. That's what I was thinking, like.
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80. I just don't like you no more.
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81. You do like me.
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82. I don't.
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83. But you liked me yesterday.
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84. Oh, did I, yeah?
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85. I thought you did.
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86. Pádraic.
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87. Dominic.
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88. What's the matter with ya?
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89. There's nothing the matter with me,
for God's sake.
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90. Look at this I found.
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91. A stick with a hook.
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92. What would you use it for, I wonder?
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93. To hook things
that were the length of a stick away?
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94. Where you goin'?
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95. Down here.
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96. As good a plan as any!
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97. - Have you any fags?
- No.
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98. Uh, you do. You always have fags.
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99. ColmSonnyLarry's at Jonjo's
handing out a rake of fags.
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100. Whoever's in the mood for one.
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101. - Is he?
- No!
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102. You're behavin' awful unusual.
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103. What are you doin' here?
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104. Was the pub closed?
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105. No, it was open.
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106. Anything in the paper?
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107. - Just the Civil War still.
- Ugh.
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108. A bad do.
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109. Mrs. McCormick's comin' over
later, Pádraic. I couldn't avoid her.
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110. I don't know if you're gonna be in or out,
but you're usually out.
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111. Am I?
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112. You are. Yeah, you know you are.
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113. I don't care, Siobhán.
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114. This is your house, too.
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115. Is it six years
since your mammy and daddy died, Siobhán,
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116. or is it seven years since they died?
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117. It's coming up to eight years,
Mrs. McCormick, aye.
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118. Is it comin' up to eight years?
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119. Doesn't time be flyin'?
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120. Aye, when you're havin' fun.
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121. Oh, be off to the pub now, Pádraic,
if you're gonna be annoyin' us.
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122. I don't have to be down there
every night, do I?
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123. ColmSonnyLarry's
scared him off, I suppose.
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124. What did you hear of ColmSonnyLarry?
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125. Didn't you and he
used to be the best of friends?
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126. We're still the best of friends.
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127. - MRS. No, you're not.
- Who says we're not?
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128. She says.
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129. Ah, for God's sake, Siobhán.
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130. I said nothing of the like,
Mrs. McCormick! I was just chatting.
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131. Now, you go off to Jonjo's, Pádraic,
and don't be getting under our feet.
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132. Sure, Mrs. McCormick never gets a chance
to come over for a chat.
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133. She never gets a chance
'cause you avoid her.
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134. I do not avoid her!
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135. You hide behind walls
if she's coming up the road.
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136. I do not
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137. h... hide behind walls.
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138. Good luck to ye.
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139. Whatever it is you're fightin' about.
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140. I didn't hear there was to be a session.
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141. Last-minute thing.
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142. Colm decided.
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143. All the ladies love Colm, you know.
Always did.
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144. Yeah? That's not true.
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145. You're still barred, Dominic! Out!
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146. You said barred until April.
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147. What are we now?
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148. April.
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149. Well, put that stick outside anyways,
and don't be bothering the women.
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150. There's women?
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151. There is women.
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152. And good ones.
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153. Well, I took out my dog
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154. And him I did shoot
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155. All down in the County Kildare...
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156. If we sat next to Colm,
the women would have to talk to us too,
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157. and then we could get at them
with our small talk.
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158. I'm happy enough sittin' here, now.
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159. Are ya, yeah?
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160. Are ya happy enough, yeah?
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161. So fill up your glasses
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162. With brandy...
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163. I can't stand the maudlin ones.
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164. Play somethin' dancey, Colm!
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165. To dance to.
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166. And not have that mope whining.
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167. So be easy and free...
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168. Here, amn't I in enough trouble with him
without your mouthing?
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169. What trouble in are you in with him?
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170. Uh, he just...
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171. doesn't want to be friends
with me no more.
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172. What is he, 12?
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173. Why does he not
want to be friends with you no more?
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174. Shh.
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175. Daddy'll kill us
if we wake him when he's been wanking.
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176. You won't get into trouble
for taking his poteen?
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177. I will get into trouble,
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178. but fuck it.
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179. I saw cannon-fire and rifle-fire
on the mainland tonight.
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180. Did you see it?
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181. That'll be the Civil War.
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182. I know that, sure.
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183. Me, I pay no attention to wars.
I'm agin 'em.
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184. Wars and soap.
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185. I tell you this much.
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186. We're good at chatting, aren't we?
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187. Me and you?
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188. Your sister, does she like to chat?
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189. Not as much as most women,
but she'll chat, like.
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190. She more likes reading.
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191. Reading?
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192. Feckin' hell.
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193. Reading.
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194. And did you ever see her
with no clothes on?
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195. I didn't.
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196. Did you not, and you her brother?
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197. Not even as a child?
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198. I don't like to be chattin'
about these types of things, Dominic!
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199. What types of things?
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200. Sisters with no clothes on!
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201. You saw my daddy with no clothes on.
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202. And till the day I die,
I'll wish I hadn't.
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203. Sure, don't I know it.
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204. The tiny, brown cock on him.
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205. What's the matter with him?
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206. Maybe bad news he's had?
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207. Daddy?
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208. No, ColmSonnyLarry.
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209. Didn't I tell ya I'd be off if you went
whining about that lummox one more time?
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210. I tell ya, it didn't look like
he had bad news tonight.
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211. It looked like a weight was lifted
from his shoulders tonight.
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212. Just bringing me cows past.
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213. What?
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214. I was just bringing me cows past.
I wasn't, you know, trying to...
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215. You don't usually bring them this way.
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216. I don't, but then the little fella
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217. took a fright
at a hen on the corner, so...
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218. I only...
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219. I only just saw
what month we changed to yesterday.
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220. More fool me?
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221. Changed to April.
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222. So, will I be callin' for ya
on me way to the pub later?
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223. I will so.
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224. Anyways,
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225. I better chase after these goons
for they're gettin' away from me.
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226. Maybe they don't like me no more neither.
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227. See you at 2:00, so, Colm.
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228. Why don't you come down
for a sherry later?
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229. There's no need to be stuck inside
on a nice day.
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230. I will so.
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231. How's the book?
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232. It's sad.
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233. Sad?
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234. Well, you should read
a not sad one, Siobhán,
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235. else you might get sad.
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236. Hmm.
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237. Do you never get lonely, Pádraic?
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238. Never get what?
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239. Lonely.
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240. Do I never get lonely?
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241. What's the matter with everybody?
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242. Jesus.
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243. "Lonely." Fecking hell.
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244. Colm?
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245. Pint, Jonjo.
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246. How's he seem?
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247. Grand, I think. With me, anyways.
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248. What are you doing?
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249. Oh, so you're gonna be
an eejit again today, is it?
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250. Amn't I allowed to have a
quiet pint on me own, Pádraic?
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251. Well, don't ask a man to call up to ya
at your fecking house, so,
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252. like he has nothing better to do
with his fecking time.
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253. I didn't ask you to call up to me
at me house.
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254. And you do have nothing better to do
with your fecking time.
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255. Huh?
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256. You do have nothing better to do
with your fecking time.
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257. I know I've nothing better to do
with me fecking time,
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258. but there's better things I could be doing
with me fecking time
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259. than to be calling up to ya
at your house, Colm Doherty!
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260. Like what?
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261. Huh?
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262. Like what else could you be doin'?
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263. Reading.
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264. Reading, yeah?
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265. Me, this morning...
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266. this I wrote.
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267. Tomorrow, I'll write
the second part of it.
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268. And the day after,
I'll write the third part of it.
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269. And by Wednesday,
there'll be a new tune in the world,
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270. which wouldn't have been there
if I'd spent the week
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271. listening to your bollocks,
Pádraic Súilleabháin.
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272. So, do you want to take your pint outside,
or do you want me to take my pint outside?
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273. I'll take my pint outside,
'cause it's a shite tune anyways,
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274. I wouldn't bother with it.
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275. I was too harsh yesterday.
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276. Yesterday, he says.
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277. I know well you was too harsh yesterday.
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278. And today.
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279. I just, uh...
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280. I just have this tremendous sense of time
slippin' away on me, Pádraic.
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281. And I think I need to spend
the time I have left
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282. thinking and composing.
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283. Just trying not to listen
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284. to any more of the dull things
that you have to say for yourself.
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285. But I'm sorry about it. I am, like.
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286. Are you dying?
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287. No, I'm not dying.
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288. But then you've loads of time.
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289. For chatting?
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290. - Aye.
- For aimless chatting?
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291. Not for aimless chatting.
For good, normal chatting.
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292. So, we'll keep aimlessly chatting
and me life'll keep dwindling.
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293. And in 12 years,
I'll die with nothin' to show for it
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294. bar the chats I've had with a limited man,
is that it?
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295. I said, "Not aimless chatting."
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296. I said, "Good, normal chatting."
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297. The other night,
two hours you spent talking to me
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298. about the things you found
in your little donkey's shite that day.
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299. Two hours, Pádraic. I timed it.
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300. Well, it wasn't me little donkey's shite,
was it?
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301. It was me pony's shite,
which shows how much you were listenin'.
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302. None of it helps me, do you understand?
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303. None of it helps me.
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304. We'll just chat about somethin' else then.
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305. What's the matter with ya?
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306. Nothin'.
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307. Aren't we going for a sherry?
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308. Don't feel like it.
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309. No, I'm not having this again today!
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310. Hey! What the hell's going on with you
and me fecking brother?
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311. Don't come in here shouting the odds at me
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312. in the middle of the fecking day,
all right, Siobhán?
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313. You can't just all of a sudden
stop being friends with a fella!
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314. Why can't I?
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315. Why can't ya? Because it isn't nice.
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316. Do you want a sherry, Siobhán?
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317. - No!
- Righty-ho.
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318. Has he said somethin' to ya
when he was drunk?
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319. No, I prefer him when he's drunk.
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320. It's all the rest of the time
I have the problem with.
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321. What's the fecking matter, then?
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322. He's dull, Siobhán.
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323. He's what?
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324. He's dull.
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325. But he's always been dull. What's changed?
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326. I've changed.
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327. I just don't have a place for dullness
in me life anymore.
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328. But you live on an island
off the coast of Ireland, Colm.
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329. What the hell are you hoping for, like?
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330. For a bit of peace, Siobhán. That's all.
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331. For a bit of peace in me heart, like.
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332. You can understand that. Can't ya?
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333. Can't ya?
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334. Do you think I'm dull?
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335. No. 'Cause you're not dull, you're nice.
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336. That's what I thought.
I mean, I'm a happy lad.
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337. Or I was.
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338. Till me best friend
started acting the gilly-gooly.
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339. It's him, Pádraic.
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340. Maybe he's just depressed.
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341. That's what I was thinking,
that he's depressed.
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342. Well, if he is,
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343. he could at least
keep it to himself, like.
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344. You know, push it down,
like the rest of us.
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345. No, Jenny! Out!
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346. Out!
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347. She just wants a bit of company, Siobhán.
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348. Animals is for outside, I've told ya.
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349. And people don't be laughing at me
behind me back,
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350. do they?
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351. No. Why would they be?
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352. They don't think I'm dim or anything?
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353. Dim?
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354. No.
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355. You don't seem very sure about it.
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356. Of course, I'm sure about it.
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357. Dominic's the dim one
on the island, isn't he?
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358. He is, aye. By miles.
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359. Uh, hang on, by miles.
And then, who's the next dimmest?
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360. Well, I don't like to judge people
in those terms now, do I?
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361. - In what terms?
- In order of their dimness.
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362. Well, I know you don't.
And neither do I, do I?
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363. - But try, like.
- No!
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364. I won't try.
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365. There's enough judgy people
on this fecking island, so no!
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366. You're not dim!
You're a nice man, all right? So, move on!
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367. I'm as clever as you, anyways.
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368. I know that at least.
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369. Yeah, don't be fecking stupid.
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370. Huh?
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371. What happened to you?
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372. Me daddy discovered the poteen situation.
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373. Oh, Jesus, Dominic!
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374. You poor thing, ya.
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375. What the hell was he hittin' you with?
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376. A kettle was the final thing.
I wouldn'ta minded, but for the spout.
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377. Do you want a ride to church?
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378. Uh, feck them gobshites!
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379. Dominic!
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380. But could I stay the night
with ye the night?
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381. Just for the one night, like?
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382. Mm...
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383. Well, just the one night, mind.
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384. Nice! I'll see ye for supper, so.
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385. Whoo-hoo!
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386. Forgive me, Father, for I have sinned.
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387. It's eight weeks
since my last confession, I think.
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388. Go on, Colm.
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389. Just the usual, I suppose, Father.
The drinking and the impure thoughts.
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390. And a bit of pride, I suppose.
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391. Although I never really saw that as a sin,
but sure I'm here now.
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392. And
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393. how's the despair?
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394. Not so much of it of late. Thanks be.
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395. And why aren't you talking
to Pádraic Súilleabháin no more?
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396. That wouldn't be a sin, now,
would it, Father?
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397. It wouldn't be a sin, no,
but it's not very nice either, is it?
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398. Who told you?
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399. It's an island, Colm. Word gets around.
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400. Also, Pádraic asked me
to put in a word, like.
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401. I see.
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402. So...
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403. It isn't him
you have the impure thoughts about, is it?
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404. Are you joking me?
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405. I mean, are you fecking joking me?
Copy !req
406. People do have impure thoughts
about men, too.
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407. Do you have impure thoughts
about men, Father?
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408. I do not have impure thoughts about men.
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409. And how dare you say that
about a man of the cloth?
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410. Well, you started it.
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411. Well, you can get out of my confessional
right now, so you can.
Copy !req
412. And I'm not forgiving you
any of these things
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413. until the next time, so I'm not!
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414. Well, I better not be dying
in the meantime then, eh, Father?
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415. I'll be pure fucked!
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416. You will be pure fucked!
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417. Yes, you will be pure fucked!
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418. Pint, Colm?
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419. If you don't stop talkin' to me,
and if you don't stop botherin' me,
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420. or sendin' your sister or your priest
to bother me...
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421. I didn't send me sister
to bother you, did I?
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422. She has her own mind.
Copy !req
423. Although, I did send the priest though,
you have me there.
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424. What I've decided to do is this.
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425. I have a set of shears at home.
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426. And each time you bother me
from this day on,
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427. I'll take those shears
Copy !req
428. and I'll take one of me fingers off
with them.
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429. And I'll give that finger to ya.
Copy !req
430. A finger from me left hand.
Me fiddle hand.
Copy !req
431. And each day you bother me more,
Copy !req
432. another I'll take off and I'll give ya
Copy !req
433. until you see sense enough to stop.
Copy !req
434. Or until I have no fingers left.
Copy !req
435. Does this make things clearer to ya?
Copy !req
436. Not really, no.
Copy !req
437. Because I don't want
to hurt your feelings, Pádraic.
Copy !req
438. I don't, like.
Copy !req
439. But it feels like the drastic
is the only option left open to me.
Copy !req
440. You've loads of options left open to ya.
Copy !req
441. How's fingers the first port of call?
Copy !req
442. Please, don't talk to me
Copy !req
443. no more, Pádraic. Please.
Copy !req
444. I'm begging you.
Copy !req
445. - But...
- Shush, like, Pádraic.
Copy !req
446. - Just, you know, shush, like.
- Yeah, I'd shush, like.
Copy !req
447. I will shush.
Copy !req
448. Except me and me sister were thinking
Copy !req
449. you might just be
a bit depressed, Colm.
Copy !req
450. And I tell you this much,
fingers just confirms it.
Copy !req
451. Don't you think, Colm?
Copy !req
452. Starting from now.
Copy !req
453. Well, I never heard the like.
Copy !req
454. I never heard the like.
He must really not like you, Pádraic.
Copy !req
455. Fingers!
Copy !req
456. Jesus. He's serious, lads.
Copy !req
457. He is serious!
Copy !req
458. You can see it in his eyes he's serious.
Copy !req
459. Just because he thinks you're dull.
Copy !req
460. That's going overboard!
Copy !req
461. Who told you about the dull?
Copy !req
462. Well, I overheard it.
Like, what was I supposed to do?
Copy !req
463. I don't think you're dull.
Copy !req
464. And jeez,
if I was to cut something off meself
Copy !req
465. for every dull person that came in here,
I'd only have me head left.
Copy !req
466. Do you think I'm dull, Gerry?
Copy !req
467. No.
Copy !req
468. That said,
Copy !req
469. I did think the two of ye
always made a funny pairing, like.
Copy !req
470. - No, we didn't.
- Yeah, ye did.
Copy !req
471. Ye did. Obviously, ye did.
Copy !req
472. 'Cause now he'd rather maim himself
than talk to ya.
Copy !req
473. Colm was always more of a thinker.
Copy !req
474. Huh?
Copy !req
475. Why's every... I think.
Copy !req
476. Ah, you don't, Pádraic.
Copy !req
477. - You don't, Pádraic.
- Your sister does.
Copy !req
478. - Your sister does, aye. Siobhán does.
- You're more of a...
Copy !req
479. You're more of a... What is he?
Copy !req
480. You're more one of life's good guys.
Copy !req
481. You're more one of life's good guys, aye.
Apart from when you're drunk.
Copy !req
482. Apart from when you're drunk, aye.
Copy !req
483. I used to think
that'd be a nice thing to be.
Copy !req
484. One of life's good guys.
Copy !req
485. And now, it sounds like
the worst thing I ever heard.
Copy !req
486. Ah, don't take it like that, Pádraic.
Copy !req
487. Don't take it like that, Pádraic.
Copy !req
488. We're on your side.
Copy !req
489. What are you smiling at?
Copy !req
490. What's this mope so mopey for?
He's just a fecking man, lads!
Copy !req
491. A fat, ginger man!
Copy !req
492. Ay yi yi.
Copy !req
493. I'll tell ya this much.
Ye two are awful mopey hosts.
Copy !req
494. Luckily, you won't have to put up with us
more than one night, so,
Copy !req
495. and try eatin' with your mouth closed.
Copy !req
496. Where are we now, France?
Copy !req
497. Will you tell him, Pádraic?
Copy !req
498. Aye, stop being
a little fecking bollocks, Dominic.
Copy !req
499. No. Just about the mouth thing.
Copy !req
500. Colm Doherty and his fat fecking fingers.
Copy !req
501. He probably wouldn't even be able
Copy !req
502. to cut through the blubber
on them fingers.
Copy !req
503. Would you not want him
to have to do the one finger
Copy !req
504. to see if he was bluffing, like?
Copy !req
505. No, we wouldn't.
Copy !req
506. That's what I'd have him do,
Copy !req
507. I'd have him do the one finger
to see if he was bluffin'.
Copy !req
508. 'Cause worst comes to worst,
Copy !req
509. he can still play the fiddle
with four fingers, I'll bet ya.
Copy !req
510. Or the banjo.
Copy !req
511. We don't want any of that.
Copy !req
512. We just want
nothing to do with him no more.
Copy !req
513. You don't. This gom does.
Copy !req
514. I am a gom, is right.
Copy !req
515. You're not a gom!
Copy !req
516. Jeez.
Copy !req
517. This is a depressing house.
Copy !req
518. Would you prefer your own, so?
Copy !req
519. I've heard it's a barrel
of fecking laughs.
Copy !req
520. Well, touché.
Copy !req
521. Too what?
Copy !req
522. Ché. Touché. It's from the French.
Copy !req
523. And how is it, Siobhán,
that you was never married?
Copy !req
524. It's none of your fecking business
how I was never fecking married.
Copy !req
525. How isn't it?
Copy !req
526. How isn't it?
Copy !req
527. Was you never wild?
Copy !req
528. Wild? Was I never wild?
Copy !req
529. I don't know
what you're talkin' about, Dominic.
Copy !req
530. Wild, how? Angry?
Copy !req
531. 'Cause I'm gettin' angry now,
I can tell ya!
Copy !req
532. Not angry. Wild.
Copy !req
533. You just keep sayin' wild, Dominic!
Copy !req
534. - Wild!
- My brother told you, didn't he?
Copy !req
535. That you'd be out in the road
if you started talking stupid to me?
Copy !req
536. He said creepy, not stupid.
Copy !req
537. Well, you've failed on both counts,
haven't ya?
Copy !req
538. I have.
Copy !req
539. I'm off to bed and he's not stayin' here
another night, Pádraic.
Copy !req
540. I don't care how depressed you are.
I'd rather have the donkey in.
Copy !req
541. Foiled again.
Copy !req
542. But "faint heart" and all that.
Copy !req
543. Here.
Copy !req
544. Ye two, ye'll be all right.
Copy !req
545. Will we be?
Copy !req
546. Hello there, Mrs. O'Riordan,
I've the milk outside for ya.
Copy !req
547. So, it's the two weeks
you owe me for now, I think.
Copy !req
548. Nobody has a lick of news for us
from your side of the island, Pádraic.
Copy !req
549. Are you going to be the same as them?
Copy !req
550. I am, Mrs. O'Riordan, I'm afraid.
And I'm in a bit of a rush, so...
Copy !req
551. Eileen Coughlan had no news.
Copy !req
552. Vincent Shaughnessy had no news.
Copy !req
553. It was a poor old week for news.
But then it is, sometimes.
Copy !req
554. ColmSonnyLarry, he had no news.
Copy !req
555. Did he not?
Copy !req
556. That man never talks.
Copy !req
557. - Eh, he talks sometimes.
- Up himself.
Copy !req
558. Aye, aye, anyways, so, it's the two weeks
you owe me for now, Mrs. O'Riordan.
Copy !req
559. As I was sayin'.
Copy !req
560. Ladies.
Copy !req
561. Oh, it's Peadar.
Copy !req
562. Peadar always has a rake of news.
Copy !req
563. - What news have you, Peadar?
- News, is it?
Copy !req
564. Fella killed himself, over Rosmuck way.
Copy !req
565. Walked into a lake for himself.
Copy !req
566. Twenty-nine and nothing wrong with him,
the fool.
Copy !req
567. God love us!
Copy !req
568. No, not "God love us." Fool!
Copy !req
569. Another fella,
Copy !req
570. Protestant, of course,
Copy !req
571. stabbed his missus in Letterkenny.
Copy !req
572. Six times he stabbed her.
Copy !req
573. Good God! And did she die, Peadar?
Copy !req
574. She did die, aye.
Copy !req
575. It wasn't with a spoon
he was stabbin' her.
Copy !req
576. That's a lot of news.
Copy !req
577. This man has no news, don't ya not?
No-Newsy!
Copy !req
578. - Stukes never have news.
- Stukes!
Copy !req
579. Funny.
Copy !req
580. There was a bit of news
I remembered, Mrs. O'Riordan.
Copy !req
581. Dominic Kearney's father
beat Dominic senseless
Copy !req
582. with a kettle Saturday,
Copy !req
583. and is staying with me
and me sister, Dominic is.
Copy !req
584. So, at least his father'll
take a bit of a break
Copy !req
585. from his beatin' of him.
Copy !req
586. And him, a policeman.
Copy !req
587. Isn't that news?
Copy !req
588. Ar, that Dominic's
an awful little bollocks.
Copy !req
589. That's no news.
Copy !req
590. Still, he was in a bad way
when I came upon him.
Copy !req
591. I'd beat him with a kettle meself
if I wasn't old.
Copy !req
592. It's news is all I'm sayin'.
Copy !req
593. That's no news. That's shite news.
Copy !req
594. Okay, so, Mrs. O'Riordan,
thanks for the...
Copy !req
595. I'll see ya when I see ya.
Copy !req
596. And you can tell
that skitter of a son of mine
Copy !req
597. he'd better be home by teatime,
Copy !req
598. or it's over to batter
the both of ye I'll be,
Copy !req
599. and your dreary fecking sister, too!
Copy !req
600. Oh, hello there, Colm.
Copy !req
601. Will I see you at Jonjo's tonight
for that pint you owe me?
Copy !req
602. I owe you no pin...
Copy !req
603. You will, Peadar.
Copy !req
604. Good man yourself.
Copy !req
605. Whoa, stand.
Copy !req
606. Stand.
Copy !req
607. What's that, Jenny?
Copy !req
608. Will we go to the pub for ourselves?
Copy !req
609. We will. Come on.
Copy !req
610. One drink you're havin', lady,
then it's off home with ya.
Copy !req
611. I've a shirt that wants ironing
for the morning.
Copy !req
612. Okay, Daddy.
Copy !req
613. Aye. Off to the mainland in the morning
I'm headin'.
Copy !req
614. That's why I need the clean shirt, like.
Copy !req
615. "And why are you off to the mainland
in the mornin', Peadar?"
Copy !req
616. Oh, thanks for asking, Colm.
I'll tell ya why.
Copy !req
617. They've asked for extra manpower
for a couple of the executions
Copy !req
618. in case there's
any kind of a to-do, like.
Copy !req
619. Six bob and a free lunch
they're payin' me.
Copy !req
620. And sure I'd have gone for nothin'.
Copy !req
621. I've always wanted to see an execution,
haven't you?
Copy !req
622. Although, I'd have preferred a hanging.
Copy !req
623. Who are they executin'?
Copy !req
624. The Free State lads are executin'
a couple of the IRA lads.
Copy !req
625. Or is it the other way around?
Copy !req
626. I find it hard to follow these days.
Copy !req
627. Wasn't it so much easier
when we was all on the same side,
Copy !req
628. and it was just the English
we was killin'?
Copy !req
629. I think it was. I preferred it.
Copy !req
630. But you don't care who's executin' who?
Copy !req
631. For six bob and a free lunch,
I don't care!
Copy !req
632. They could be executin' you.
Copy !req
633. Why don't you come with me?
Copy !req
634. You could write
a miserable feckin' song about it.
Copy !req
635. Nah, I'm only messin'.
Copy !req
636. Who are them?
Copy !req
637. Music students, I think,
from Lisdoonvarna.
Copy !req
638. Another whiskey, anyways, Jonjo.
Copy !req
639. Jeez, you're goin' at it
at a fair old lick tonight, Pádraic.
Copy !req
640. Yeah? What's it to ya?
Copy !req
641. Pádraic, don't now...
Copy !req
642. Go get Siobhán, Dominic, would ya?
Copy !req
643. What are you after, gobshite?
Copy !req
644. Another beatin', is it?
Copy !req
645. You, copper,
I'm allowed to chat to you, aren't I?
Copy !req
646. It's just tubbyguts
I'm not allowed to talk to.
Copy !req
647. Actually, no, I'd rather
you didn't talk to me neither.
Copy !req
648. Oh, well, anyways,
Copy !req
649. do you want to know what the three things
that I hate the most
Copy !req
650. - on Inisherin is?
- Not really.
Copy !req
651. One,
Copy !req
652. policemen.
Copy !req
653. Two,
Copy !req
654. pudgy fiddle players.
Copy !req
655. And three...
Copy !req
656. Wait, I had some funny thing
for three. What was it?
Copy !req
657. Uh, I'll start again. One, um,
Copy !req
658. policemen.
Copy !req
659. Two...
Copy !req
660. Pudgy fiddle players.
Copy !req
661. Pudgy fiddle players.
Copy !req
662. And shite, what was three?
Copy !req
663. Go on back to your own gang now, Pádraic.
I'm serious, now.
Copy !req
664. Serious, are ya?
Copy !req
665. And talkin' to me, are ya?
Copy !req
666. Siobhán!
Copy !req
667. Pádraic's out of his brains on whiskey,
and Colm's there.
Copy !req
668. You'd better come.
Copy !req
669. You, Colm Doherty,
do you know what you used to be?
Copy !req
670. No, Pádraic, what did I used to be?
Copy !req
671. Nice!
Copy !req
672. You used to be nice!
Copy !req
673. Didn't he not?
Copy !req
674. And now, do you know what you are?
Copy !req
675. Not nice.
Copy !req
676. Ah, well,
Copy !req
677. I suppose niceness doesn't last then,
does it, Pádraic?
Copy !req
678. But will I tell ya something
that does last?
Copy !req
679. What? And don't say
somethin' stupid like music.
Copy !req
680. - Music lasts.
- Knew it!
Copy !req
681. And paintings last. And poetry lasts.
Copy !req
682. So does niceness.
Copy !req
683. Do you know who we remember
Copy !req
684. for how nice they was in the 17th century?
Copy !req
685. - Who?
- Absolutely no one.
Copy !req
686. Yet we all remember the music of the time.
Copy !req
687. Everyone, to a man, knows Mozart's name.
Copy !req
688. Well, I don't, so there goes that theory.
Copy !req
689. And anyway, we're talkin' about niceness.
Copy !req
690. Not whatsisname.
Copy !req
691. My mammy, she was nice.
Copy !req
692. I remember her.
Copy !req
693. And my daddy, he was nice. I remember him.
Copy !req
694. And my sister, she's nice.
Copy !req
695. I'll remember her.
Forever I'll remember her.
Copy !req
696. - And who else will?
- "Who else will" what?
Copy !req
697. Remember Siobhán and your niceness?
Copy !req
698. No one will.
Copy !req
699. In 50 years' time,
Copy !req
700. no one will remember any of us.
Copy !req
701. Yet the music of a man
who lived two centuries ago...
Copy !req
702. "Yet," he says, like he's English.
Copy !req
703. Come home, Pádraic.
Copy !req
704. I don't give a feck about Mozart,
Copy !req
705. or Borvoven,
Copy !req
706. or any of them funny name feckers.
Copy !req
707. I'm Pádraic Súilleabháin.
Copy !req
708. And I'm nice.
Copy !req
709. Come home.
Copy !req
710. So you'd rather be friends
with this fella, would ya?
Copy !req
711. A fella who
Copy !req
712. beats his own son
black and blue every night
Copy !req
713. that he's not fiddling with him.
Copy !req
714. I never told him that, Daddy.
He's... He's just drunk now.
Copy !req
715. You used to be nice.
Copy !req
716. Or did you never used to be?
Copy !req
717. Oh, God.
Copy !req
718. Maybe you never used to be.
Copy !req
719. I'll have a word with him, Colm.
You don't need to do anything drastic.
Copy !req
720. He won't be botherin' you no more.
Copy !req
721. That's a shame.
Copy !req
722. That's the most interesting
he's ever been.
Copy !req
723. I think I like him again now.
Copy !req
724. It was the 18th century, anyway. Mozart.
Copy !req
725. Not the 17th.
Copy !req
726. Siobhán Súilleabháin! Well, well.
Copy !req
727. I only came in for rashers,
Mrs. O'Riordan.
Copy !req
728. I've no time to talk, I'm afraid.
Copy !req
729. Letter came for ya.
Copy !req
730. Fell open, did it?
Copy !req
731. Aye, in the heat, I suppose.
Copy !req
732. A job offer, is it?
Copy !req
733. A job offer from a library
on the mainland, is it?
Copy !req
734. Just the rashers, please, Mrs. O'Riordan.
About ten of them.
Copy !req
735. You never tell me anything!
Copy !req
736. Well, it'd crucify him, your leaving!
Copy !req
737. Hey, no one's leaving!
Copy !req
738. Listen, I didn't come down to chat.
Copy !req
739. I just came down to say
that all that last night
Copy !req
740. was just the whiskey talkin', Colm.
Copy !req
741. All what last night?
Copy !req
742. All whatever it was I was sayin'.
Copy !req
743. What were you sayin'?
Copy !req
744. Uh... Yeah. I can't remember much of it,
Copy !req
745. but I remember
the gist of it wasn't the best.
Copy !req
746. You always know, don't ya?
Copy !req
747. Well, anyways,
I just wanted to say I was sorry.
Copy !req
748. Will we leave it at that?
Copy !req
749. Why can't you just
leave me alone, Pádraic?
Copy !req
750. Huh?
Copy !req
751. I've already told ya, haven't I?
Copy !req
752. Yeah, I know. I was just...
Copy !req
753. I mean, why can't you just leave me alone?
Copy !req
754. - What are ya doing?
- I don't know.
Copy !req
755. For fuck's sake, like.
Copy !req
756. How... How's the new tune?
Copy !req
757. What?
Copy !req
758. Ar, for God's sake, Pádraic.
Copy !req
759. How many more times?
Copy !req
760. I am not putting me donkey outside
when I am sad, okay?
Copy !req
761. Well, stringy bits of shite
I had to pick up
Copy !req
762. yesterday when ya let her in!
Copy !req
763. There was no stringy bits
in that donkey's shite.
Copy !req
764. There was bits of straw,
if there was anything.
Copy !req
765. Maybe it was straw, so.
Copy !req
766. I'll get us our porridge.
Copy !req
767. Was I awful last night?
Copy !req
768. No, you was lovely.
Copy !req
769. Well, I know I wasn't lovely
now, Siobhán.
Copy !req
770. You were lovely. About me, anyways.
Copy !req
771. Of course I was lovely about you.
Copy !req
772. What else is there to be about ya?
Copy !req
773. What was that? A bird?
Copy !req
774. What was what?
Copy !req
775. The bang at the door.
Copy !req
776. A bird?
Copy !req
777. - Aye.
- No.
Copy !req
778. What was it, so?
Copy !req
779. - The bang at the door?
- Aye!
Copy !req
780. What was the bang at the door?
Copy !req
781. It was, uh...
Copy !req
782. hard to lie...
Copy !req
783. it was, uh...
Copy !req
784. a finger.
Copy !req
785. A what?
Copy !req
786. Finger.
Copy !req
787. Jesus, Siobhán!
You'll frighten the little fella!
Copy !req
788. Throw it out, Pádraic!
Copy !req
789. I'm not throwing his finger out!
It'll get dirt on it!
Copy !req
790. Where... Where'd you put it?
Copy !req
791. Shoebox.
Copy !req
792. Oh, my. Oh, God.
Copy !req
793. Well,
Copy !req
794. he's serious, then.
Copy !req
795. Do we have to have it in here
while we're eating?
Copy !req
796. Once I finish me porridge,
I'll bring it back to him.
Copy !req
797. Are you feckin' stupid?
Copy !req
798. I mean, are you feckin' stupid?
Copy !req
799. No, I'm not feckin' stupid.
We've had this discussion.
Copy !req
800. You've got to leave him
alone now, Pádraic. For good!
Copy !req
801. Do you think?
Copy !req
802. Do I think? Yeah, I do think!
Copy !req
803. He's cut his feckin' finger off,
and thrown it at ya!
Copy !req
804. Come on! It wasn't at me.
Copy !req
805. Well, what are we going to do?
Copy !req
806. We can't keep a man's finger.
Copy !req
807. Jesus, Colm!
Copy !req
808. Did it hurt?
Copy !req
809. Hurt awful to begin with.
Thought I was going to faint.
Copy !req
810. It's funny, feels fine now,
in all the excitement.
Copy !req
811. Would you like a cup of tea?
Copy !req
812. I won't, Colm. I only came up
to give you your finger back.
Copy !req
813. Oh, yeah?
Copy !req
814. Thanks.
Copy !req
815. Cleared up quite nice, actually.
Copy !req
816. And you wouldn't have thought it would.
Copy !req
817. What do you need from him, Colm?
Copy !req
818. To end all this?
Copy !req
819. Silence, Siobhán.
Copy !req
820. Just silence.
Copy !req
821. One more silent man on Inisherin, good-oh!
Copy !req
822. Silence it is, so.
Copy !req
823. This isn't about Inisherin.
Copy !req
824. It's about one boring man
leaving another man alone, that's all.
Copy !req
825. "One boring man"!
You're all fecking boring!
Copy !req
826. With your piddling grievances
over nothin'!
Copy !req
827. You're all fecking boring!
Copy !req
828. I'll see he doesn't talk to you no more.
Copy !req
829. Do.
Copy !req
830. Else it'll be all four of them
the next time, not just the one.
Copy !req
831. You're not serious.
Copy !req
832. Well, that won't help your fecking music.
Copy !req
833. Aye.
Copy !req
834. We're gettin' somewhere now.
Copy !req
835. I think you might be ill, Colm.
Copy !req
836. Do worry sometimes
I'm just entertaining meself
Copy !req
837. while I stave off the inevitable.
Copy !req
838. Don't you?
Copy !req
839. No, I don't.
Copy !req
840. Yeah, you do.
Copy !req
841. Declan!
Copy !req
842. Howdo!
Copy !req
843. Howdo!
Copy !req
844. Do you want a ride?
Copy !req
845. I will so.
Copy !req
846. Thanks, fella!
Copy !req
847. Oh, no, you're not that student fella
from Lisdoonvarna, are ya?
Copy !req
848. I am. I'm Declan.
Copy !req
849. Why?
Copy !req
850. They told me at the post office
to try to find
Copy !req
851. that student fella, Declan,
from Lisdoonvarna.
Copy !req
852. Yeah, a telegram came for ya.
Copy !req
853. From your mammy.
Copy !req
854. My mammy is no longer with us.
Copy !req
855. Not your mammy, sorry.
Copy !req
856. Did I say your mammy?
Your auntie. Yeah, your auntie.
Copy !req
857. It's about your daddy.
Copy !req
858. What about Daddy?
Copy !req
859. Uh, bread van crashed into him.
Copy !req
860. - The bread van?
- Yeah.
Copy !req
861. They said you'd best hurry home to him,
lest he should die all alone.
Copy !req
862. Die?
Copy !req
863. Or get worse, all alone.
Copy !req
864. This is impossible.
Copy !req
865. It's not impossible.
Copy !req
866. Bread vans crash into people all the time.
Copy !req
867. I know!
Copy !req
868. That's how me mammy died.
Copy !req
869. If it's the same fecking bread van,
I'll kill them.
Copy !req
870. Thanks.
Copy !req
871. What were you talking
to the boat fella for?
Copy !req
872. For none of your fecking
business, I think it was.
Copy !req
873. Of course, it's me business.
Aren't I the law?
Copy !req
874. Fecking knob.
Copy !req
875. Huh?
Copy !req
876. Well, you can tell
that whiny brother of yours
Copy !req
877. I'll be around soon
for that battering I owe him.
Copy !req
878. A battering?
Copy !req
879. That'd be good, actually.
It might take him out of himself.
Copy !req
880. Huh?
Copy !req
881. You're an awful strange lady.
Copy !req
882. No wonder no one likes ya.
Copy !req
883. Oh.
Copy !req
884. Hello there, Mrs. McCormick.
Copy !req
885. A death shall come to Inisherin
afore the month is out.
Copy !req
886. A death, huh?
Copy !req
887. Maybe even two deaths.
Copy !req
888. Well, that'd be sad.
Copy !req
889. We shall pray to the Lord
Copy !req
890. 'tis neither you, nor poor Siobhán,
will be either of them.
Copy !req
891. Well, is that a nice thing to be sayin'?
Copy !req
892. I wasn't trying to be nice.
Copy !req
893. I was trying to be accurate.
Copy !req
894. Fecking hell.
Copy !req
895. What's the matter?
Copy !req
896. Nothing.
Copy !req
897. Me daddy say he's gonna kill you Sunday
Copy !req
898. for spilling the beans
about that fiddling with me.
Copy !req
899. "Kill me," kill me, or, you know,
Copy !req
900. "beat me up a bit," kill me?
Copy !req
901. "Beat you up a bit," kill ya, I think.
Copy !req
902. Although he did kill a man once.
Copy !req
903. I'm sorry for that
spilling the beans on ya, Dominic.
Copy !req
904. I was out of order that night.
Copy !req
905. You was funny apart from that bit.
Copy !req
906. That's why I don't understand
why that fat fella threw the finger at ya.
Copy !req
907. He seemed fine when you were slagging him.
Copy !req
908. He did not.
Copy !req
909. Did he?
Copy !req
910. "That's the most interesting
Pádraic's ever been," he said.
Copy !req
911. "I think I like him again now."
Copy !req
912. Aye.
Copy !req
913. Maybe this whole thing has just been about
gettin' you to try a new tack,
Copy !req
914. start standin' up for yourself a bit.
Copy !req
915. Do you think?
Copy !req
916. Yeah, and be less of a, you know,
Copy !req
917. whiny little dull-arse.
Copy !req
918. Well, I have been less
of a whiny little dull-arse, actually.
Copy !req
919. Have ya, yeah?
Copy !req
920. Just yesterday,
there was this musician fella
Copy !req
921. that Colm was getting along great with.
Copy !req
922. And what did I do?
Copy !req
923. I went and sent him packing
from the island.
Copy !req
924. Did ya? How?
Copy !req
925. I told him a bread van
crashed into his daddy,
Copy !req
926. and he'd have to be rushing
home to him, lest he die.
Copy !req
927. Oh...
Copy !req
928. That sounds like the meanest thing
I've ever heard.
Copy !req
929. Huh?
Copy !req
930. Well, aye, it was a bit mean, but...
Copy !req
931. he'll be fine once he gets home
Copy !req
932. and he finds his daddy
hasn't been hit by a bread van.
Copy !req
933. I used to think
you were the nicest of them.
Copy !req
934. Turns out you're just the same as them.
Copy !req
935. I am the nicest of them.
Copy !req
936. Ar, Dominic, now!
Copy !req
937. Well, maybe I'm not a happy lad, so!
Copy !req
938. Maybe this is the new me!
Copy !req
939. Aye.
Copy !req
940. Maybe this is the new me.
Copy !req
941. Howdo!
Copy !req
942. Jesus Christ, Dominic!
Copy !req
943. Would you ever stop creeping up on people?
Copy !req
944. You almost gave me a fecking heart attack!
Copy !req
945. I wasn't creeping up on ya.
Copy !req
946. I was sidling up on ya.
Copy !req
947. Between you and that ghoul, Jesus!
Copy !req
948. I always call her a ghoul, too,
because she is a ghoul.
Copy !req
949. Jeez, we have a lot in common, don't we?
Me and you.
Copy !req
950. Calling old people ghouls and that.
Copy !req
951. It's a great old lake, isn't it?
Copy !req
952. I'm glad I caught you, actually.
Copy !req
953. Because there was somethin'
I was wantin' to ask ya, actually.
Copy !req
954. And discovering how much
we have in common,
Copy !req
955. well, it just makes me
want to ask you even more.
Copy !req
956. We don't have anything in common.
Copy !req
957. Uh, don't skip ahead.
Copy !req
958. But yeah, what I was wantin'
to ask you was...
Copy !req
959. Somethin' along the lines of...
Copy !req
960. Should've planned this, really.
Copy !req
961. Well, yeah,
what I was wantin' to ask you was...
Copy !req
962. You probably wouldn't ever want to,
I don't know,
Copy !req
963. to fall in love with a boy like me,
would ya?
Copy !req
964. Oh, Dominic, I don't think so, love.
Copy !req
965. No, yeah, no. Uh, I was thinking no.
Copy !req
966. Not even in the future, like?
Like when I'm your age?
Copy !req
967. Yeah, no, I didn't think so.
Copy !req
968. Just thought I'd ask
on the off chance, you know,
Copy !req
969. like, "faint heart" and that.
Copy !req
970. Well, there goes that dream.
Copy !req
971. Well,
Copy !req
972. I best go over there and do whatever
that thing over there I was gonna do was.
Copy !req
973. Mm-hmm.
Copy !req
974. I walked from Mallow Town
Copy !req
975. To Aghadoe, Aghadoe
Copy !req
976. I took his head
from the jail gate to Aghadoe
Copy !req
977. Come on, Sammy, you have to dance too.
Copy !req
978. Like an Irish king he sleeps in Aghadoe
Copy !req
979. How are you, fatty?
Copy !req
980. Dancing with your dog, is it?
Copy !req
981. Well, who else is gonna dance with ya?
Your poor dog has no say in the matter.
Copy !req
982. And if you're too rude
to be offering me a seat,
Copy !req
983. I'll be taking one of me own accord!
Copy !req
984. Now, how's that for an old hello?
Copy !req
985. Have you gone fecking mental?
Copy !req
986. Have I gone fecking mental?
Copy !req
987. No, I haven't gone
fecking mental, actually.
Copy !req
988. Not only have I not gone fecking mental,
Copy !req
989. but I have ten fingers
to prove I've not gone fecking mental.
Copy !req
990. How many fingers do you have
to prove you've not gone fecking mental?
Copy !req
991. Nine fingers.
Copy !req
992. And nine fingers is the epitome of mental.
Copy !req
993. That's right. The epitome!
Copy !req
994. Heh. There'll be none of that!
I didn't come here for licks!
Copy !req
995. I came here for the opposite of licks.
Copy !req
996. What's the opposite of licks?
Copy !req
997. Huh?
Copy !req
998. What did you come here for?
Copy !req
999. I didn't come here for anythin', did I?
Copy !req
1000. I just came to kick your door in
and give you a slagging.
Copy !req
1001. Well, you've done that, so you can go now.
Copy !req
1002. Haven't finished yet, have I?
Copy !req
1003. Well, I finished with your door.
I haven't finished with your slagging.
Copy !req
1004. We were doin' so well, Pádraic.
Copy !req
1005. I wasn't doing so well.
Copy !req
1006. I was doing terrible.
Copy !req
1007. All right, I was doin' so well.
Copy !req
1008. Yeah, well, it can't all be
you, you, you, can it?
Copy !req
1009. Yes, it can.
Copy !req
1010. - There's two of us in this.
- No, there isn't.
Copy !req
1011. It takes two to tango.
Copy !req
1012. I don't want to tango.
Copy !req
1013. Well, you danced with your dog.
Copy !req
1014. Talkin' of tangos,
how's your new tune comin' along?
Copy !req
1015. I just finished it, actually.
Copy !req
1016. Just this morning.
Copy !req
1017. No, Colm, that's great, like!
Copy !req
1018. That's why I was dancing with me dog.
Copy !req
1019. I don't usually dance with me dog.
Copy !req
1020. There's no harm
dancin' with your dog.
Copy !req
1021. I'd dance with me donkey if I knew how.
And she did.
Copy !req
1022. Is it good?
Copy !req
1023. Your tune?
Copy !req
1024. Mm, what's it called?
Copy !req
1025. "The Banshees of Inisherin,"
I was thinking.
Copy !req
1026. But there are no banshees on Inisherin.
Copy !req
1027. I know, I just like the double S-H sounds.
Copy !req
1028. Aye.
Copy !req
1029. There's plenty of double S-H on Inisherin.
Copy !req
1030. Yeah.
Copy !req
1031. Maybe there are banshees, too.
Copy !req
1032. I just don't think that they scream
to portend death anymore.
Copy !req
1033. I think they just sit back, amused,
and observe.
Copy !req
1034. Portend?
Copy !req
1035. Yeah.
Copy !req
1036. I keep having thoughts
about playing it for you at your funeral.
Copy !req
1037. But that wouldn't be fair on either of us,
would it?
Copy !req
1038. Well, that's great
that you finished your tune, Colm.
Copy !req
1039. That's more than great.
Copy !req
1040. That's...
Copy !req
1041. really great.
Copy !req
1042. So, do you want
to meet me down the pub, Colm?
Copy !req
1043. We could celebrate your tune, like.
Copy !req
1044. Only if you'd like, like.
Copy !req
1045. But I could run up ahead. Order them in.
Copy !req
1046. Why don't you do that, Pádraic?
Copy !req
1047. Why don't I run up...
Copy !req
1048. and order them?
Copy !req
1049. Well, I will so.
Copy !req
1050. Jeez, that went well!
And maybe on the way,
Copy !req
1051. I can find that student friend
of yours, that Declan fella!
Copy !req
1052. I told him his daddy was dying,
so he'd feck off home
Copy !req
1053. and leave us alone,
but there's no need now!
Copy !req
1054. Sure he could join us.
Copy !req
1055. What are you sitting over there for
when I'm over here?
Copy !req
1056. Just thought I'd have a sit for meself,
you know.
Copy !req
1057. Wait for me friend.
Copy !req
1058. Are you fecking joking me?
Copy !req
1059. Your four-fingered friend?
Copy !req
1060. I mean, are you fecking joking me?
Copy !req
1061. No, I'm not fecking joking ya.
Copy !req
1062. He just needed
a bit of tough love was all.
Copy !req
1063. Siobhán, do you want a sherry?
Copy !req
1064. - No.
- Righty-ho.
Copy !req
1065. What are you doin'?
Copy !req
1066. - Me?
- Yes, you.
Copy !req
1067. Nothing. Just drinkin'.
Copy !req
1068. - Not waitin'?
- Not waitin'.
Copy !req
1069. Well, he is waitin', Siobhán.
He's waitin' for Colm Doherty.
Copy !req
1070. I amn't waitin'.
Copy !req
1071. He just told me he was waitin'.
Copy !req
1072. Telltale!
Copy !req
1073. Come home with me, Pádraic.
I've somethin' to discuss with ya.
Copy !req
1074. You've somethin' to discuss with me?
Copy !req
1075. That sounds, uh...
Copy !req
1076. I don't want to discuss somethin'.
Copy !req
1077. Well, ya have to, 'cause I'm leavin'.
Copy !req
1078. Leavin'?
Copy !req
1079. Like leavin'?
Copy !req
1080. Like...
Copy !req
1081. not staying?
Copy !req
1082. Yeah.
Copy !req
1083. But what about me?
Copy !req
1084. What about you?
Copy !req
1085. I'll have no friends at all left!
Copy !req
1086. - You'll have Dominic.
- Ah here!
Copy !req
1087. And he's gone off me now, too.
Copy !req
1088. What kind of a place is it
when the village gom goes off ya?
Copy !req
1089. And who's gonna do the cookin'?
Copy !req
1090. Oh, that's your first question, isn't it?
"Who's gonna do the cookin'?"
Copy !req
1091. Well, it wasn't me first question, was it?
Copy !req
1092. "But what about me?"
was me first question.
Copy !req
1093. Pádraic.
Copy !req
1094. Pádraic!
Copy !req
1095. Now?
But you can't be leavin' now!
Copy !req
1096. I can be leavin' now.
Copy !req
1097. I can't be waitin' round
for any more of this madness!
Copy !req
1098. What the hell did you say to him, Pádraic?
Copy !req
1099. Nothin' really.
Copy !req
1100. Well, I'd sort of had a chat
with Dominic earlier.
Copy !req
1101. And a new sort of,
Copy !req
1102. you know, standin' up for meself
sort of tack we thought I should try.
Copy !req
1103. God!
Copy !req
1104. It was all going fine
until he chopped off all his fingers.
Copy !req
1105. Me books wouldn't fit.
Copy !req
1106. Would you look after them for me?
Copy !req
1107. Ar, don't go, Siobhán.
Copy !req
1108. They're all I have, really.
Copy !req
1109. Apart from the obvious.
Copy !req
1110. You'll be back soon, won't you, Siobhán?
Copy !req
1111. Oh, Pádraic!
Copy !req
1112. Don't say, "Oh, Pádraic."
Copy !req
1113. Say yes.
Copy !req
1114. Ah, Jenny.
Copy !req
1115. Oh.
Copy !req
1116. I don't want to talk.
Copy !req
1117. Don't go killin' his dog now.
Copy !req
1118. And don't be puttin' things in me head
Copy !req
1119. that weren't there
in the first feckin' place,
Copy !req
1120. you feckin' nutbag!
Copy !req
1121. "Nutbag!"
Copy !req
1122. What would I ever hurt you for?
Copy !req
1123. You're the only nice thing about him.
Copy !req
1124. How are you, Pádraic? You're lookin' well.
Copy !req
1125. That's lovely, lads.
Copy !req
1126. I don't need your apologies, all right?
Copy !req
1127. It's a relief to me.
Copy !req
1128. So, let's just call it quits
Copy !req
1129. and agree to go our separate ways,
for good this time.
Copy !req
1130. Your fat fingers
killed me little donkey today.
Copy !req
1131. So, no, we won't call it quits.
Copy !req
1132. We'll call it the start.
Copy !req
1133. - You're jokin' me.
- Yeah, no.
Copy !req
1134. I'm not jokin' ya.
Copy !req
1135. So tomorrow, Sunday,
Copy !req
1136. God's day, around 2:00,
Copy !req
1137. I'm going to call up to your house
and I'm gonna set fire to it,
Copy !req
1138. and hopefully you'll still be inside it.
Copy !req
1139. But I won't be checkin' either way.
Copy !req
1140. Just be sure and leave your dog outside.
Copy !req
1141. I've nothing against that gom.
Copy !req
1142. Or you can do
whatever's in your power to stop me.
Copy !req
1143. To our graves we're taking this.
Copy !req
1144. To one of our graves, anyways.
Copy !req
1145. Here.
Copy !req
1146. I've a bone to pick with you, dreary.
Copy !req
1147. Is that little gobshite of mine
at your place again?
Copy !req
1148. Leave him, Peadar. His donkey's just died.
Copy !req
1149. Did he?
Copy !req
1150. The little miniature fella?
Copy !req
1151. Well, Jesus, boys,
I'll tell ya this much...
Copy !req
1152. Two o'clock.
Copy !req
1153. I killed a miniature donkey.
Copy !req
1154. It was by accident...
Copy !req
1155. but I do feel bad about it.
Copy !req
1156. Do you think God gives a damn
about miniature donkeys, Colm?
Copy !req
1157. I fear he doesn't.
Copy !req
1158. And I fear
that's where it's all gone wrong.
Copy !req
1159. Is that it?
Copy !req
1160. Is what it?
Copy !req
1161. Aren't you forgetting a couple of things?
Copy !req
1162. No, I think I've covered it.
Copy !req
1163. Wouldn't you say
punching a policeman is a sin?
Copy !req
1164. Ah here.
Copy !req
1165. If punching a policeman is a sin,
Copy !req
1166. we may as well just pack up and go home.
Copy !req
1167. And self-mutilation is a sin.
Copy !req
1168. It's one of the biggest.
Copy !req
1169. Is it?
Copy !req
1170. Self-mutilation, so you have me there.
Copy !req
1171. Multiplied by five.
Copy !req
1172. How's the despair?
Copy !req
1173. It's back a bit.
Copy !req
1174. But you're not gonna do anything about it?
Copy !req
1175. I'm not gonna do anything about it, no.
Copy !req
1176. Dear Pádraic,
Copy !req
1177. I am safely ensconced in the mainland
and, Pádraic, it's lovely here.
Copy !req
1178. There's a river running past my window
as I write,
Copy !req
1179. and the people already seem
less bitter and mental.
Copy !req
1180. I'm not sure why, but I think
it's 'cause a lot of them are from Spain.
Copy !req
1181. Mostly, I wanted to say
there's a spare bed here for you, Pádraic.
Copy !req
1182. And with the war almost over,
I think there'd be work for ya here.
Copy !req
1183. Because there's nothing
for you on Inisherin.
Copy !req
1184. Nothing but more bleakness and grudges
Copy !req
1185. and loneliness and spite
Copy !req
1186. and the slow passing of time until death.
Copy !req
1187. And sure, you can do that anywhere.
Copy !req
1188. So come, Pádraic. Leave there.
Copy !req
1189. Dominic can look after Jenny
and the rest of your animals.
Copy !req
1190. They could move into the house together.
Copy !req
1191. Hut!
Copy !req
1192. So come now, Pádraic, please.
Copy !req
1193. Before it's all too late.
Copy !req
1194. Dear Siobhán.
Copy !req
1195. Obviously, I don't know
what "ensconced" is,
Copy !req
1196. but I thank you for the offer
of the free bed and the whatnot.
Copy !req
1197. But I won't be takin' you up on it,
I'm afraid.
Copy !req
1198. As I told you, me life is on Inisherin.
Copy !req
1199. Me friends, me animals.
Copy !req
1200. Even now as I write,
Copy !req
1201. little donkey Jenny
is looking at me, saying,
Copy !req
1202. "Please don't go, Pádraic. We'd miss ya."
Copy !req
1203. And nuzzling me, the gilly-gooly.
Copy !req
1204. Get off, Jenny.
Copy !req
1205. MRS. Psst!
Copy !req
1206. In other news,
Copy !req
1207. in sadder news, actually,
Copy !req
1208. I won't be able to ask Dominic
anything, I'm afraid.
Copy !req
1209. Because they found him
in the lake this morning.
Copy !req
1210. I suppose he must've slipped and fell in.
Copy !req
1211. So, there'd be no one
to take care of the animals, anyway.
Copy !req
1212. No other news, really.
Copy !req
1213. Except that I love you, Siobhán.
Copy !req
1214. And I miss ya.
Copy !req
1215. And I hope I'll see ya again someday.
Copy !req
1216. If you ever come back home.
Copy !req
1217. Come back home, Siobhán.
Copy !req
1218. Yours sincerely, your loving brother...
Copy !req
1219. Pádraic Súilleabháin.
Copy !req
1220. Suppose me house makes us quits.
Copy !req
1221. If you'd stayed in your house,
that would've made us quits.
Copy !req
1222. But you didn't, did ya,
so it doesn't, does it?
Copy !req
1223. I'm sorry about your donkey, Pádraic.
Copy !req
1224. Honestly, I am.
Copy !req
1225. I don't fucking care.
Copy !req
1226. Haven't heard any rifle fire
from the mainland in a day or two.
Copy !req
1227. I think they're coming to the end of it.
Copy !req
1228. I'm sure they'll be at it again
soon enough, aren't you?
Copy !req
1229. Some things there's no movin' on from.
Copy !req
1230. And I think that's a good thing.
Copy !req
1231. Pádraic.
Copy !req
1232. Thanks for lookin' after me dog
for me, anyways.
Copy !req
1233. Any time.
Copy !req