1. 7:45 on this beautiful, almost balmy
22nd of September in Schenectady.
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2. And it's the first day of fall.
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3. So in honor of that fact,
we have Elke Putzkammer...
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4. professor of literature
at Union College...
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5. to talk about autumn in poetry
and literature.
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6. - Good morning, professor.
- Hi, Alex.
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7. So, what about it? Why do
so many people write about the fall?
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8. Well, I think it's seen
as the beginning of the end, really.
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9. If the year is a life, then September,
the beginning of fall...
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10. is when the bloom is off the rose
and things start to die.
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11. It's a melancholy month and maybe
because of that, quite beautiful.
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12. Is there something
you might read to us?
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13. Oh, I'd love to.
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14. Whoever has no house now
Will never have one.
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15. Whoever is alone will stay alone
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16. Will sit, read, write long letters
Through the evening
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17. And wander the boulevards
Up and down, restlessly
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18. While the dry leaves are blowing
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19. Goodness, that harsh, isn't it?
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20. Well, perhaps. But truthful.
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21. Mommy, done.
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22. Okay.
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23. - Good morning.
- Good morning.
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24. - I tried not to wake you.
- Well, thanks.
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25. You didn't. I just...
You know, I couldn't get up.
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26. - Caden, can you get that?
- It's Maria, I don't want to.
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27. - Caden... Oh, that's weird.
- Hey, it's me. How are you?
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28. Mommy, is something wrong
with my poop?
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29. No, honey, it's just green.
You probably ate something green.
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30. I didn't. What's wrong with me?
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31. I have to get that, Olive.
You're gonna be fine, okay?
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32. - But, Mommy...
- Yeah, I'll be right back, Olive.
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33. Oh, nothing.
Just wiping Olive's ass. You?
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34. - An earthquake in Kashmir...
- Oh, you're kidding. Holy fuck.
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35. - ... has killed an estimated 73,000...
- I don't feel well.
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36. Oh, my goodness.
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37. march in Washington, D.C., today,
October 15th.
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38. - Harold Pinter died.
- Well, he's old, right?
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39. - No, wait. He won the Nobel Prize.
- Mom.
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40. - What, honey?
- Do you need to look at my poop?
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41. - You sure it's all right?
- It's fine, Olive. Just flush.
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42. What if it's alive? What if I kill it?
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43. - It's green like plants.
- It's not alive, honey.
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44. Remember the production of
The Dumb Waiter I did at Albanyfest?
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45. Have your oatmeal, honey.
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46. - I want peanut butter and jelly.
- You said oatmeal.
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47. - This isn't a restaurant.
- I don't want oatmeal.
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48. - Okay. Fine.
- Mommy, I'm sorry.
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49. They found avian flu in Turkey.
In the country Turkey, not turkeys.
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50. - Can I watch TV till school?
- In some chickens. Yeah.
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51. There is a secret something at play
under the surface...
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52. growing like an invisible virus
of thought.
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53. But you're being changed by it...
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54. - Milk's expired.
- Okay.
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55. Jesus.
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56. - You better eat this.
- I will.
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57. Yeah.
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58. How did I guess
you'd ask me that question?
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59. Happy Halloween, Schenectady.
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60. And how long have you been
in New York for?
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61. The first black graduate
of the University of Alabama died.
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62. Vivian Malone Jones.
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63. Stroke, 63.
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64. Fuck!
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65. God! Somebody! Adele, help!
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66. - Jesus, Caden, what the fuck?
- I was shaving and the thing flew off!
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67. Oh, my God!
Jesus, look at your head.
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68. Oh, shit.
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69. Oh, God, I can't turn it.
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70. Oh, wait.
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71. - Mommy, Daddy has blood.
- Yeah.
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72. - Will there be a scar?
- Probably. It looks like a mud flap.
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73. - I prefer there not to be a scar.
- Yeah.
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74. That fellow is annoying.
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75. He's in here every week,
like clockwork.
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76. There. I think that should...
Let's see.
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77. - What?
- Change in bowel movements?
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78. It's a little more yellow than usual.
Why?
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79. Yeah, I'd like you to see
an ophthalmologist.
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80. - A neurologist?
- What? No.
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81. An ophthalmologist.
I said, ophthalmologist.
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82. Do you hear that?
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83. Yeah.
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84. And today is Tuesday.
Mommy, is today Tuesday?
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85. No, honey, today is Friday.
So, what exactly did he say?
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86. That my pupils weren't properly
opening and closing.
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87. Dilating.
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88. - No.
- Yeah.
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89. - I don't think that's what he said.
- Yes.
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90. - That's not what he said.
- Is it the bump to your head?
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91. He doesn't know. Maybe.
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92. He said he doesn't think so,
but maybe. But he doesn't know.
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93. - But maybe. Who knows?
- Okay, Jesus, Caden, I got it.
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94. - He doesn't know...
- Sorry. I'm a little anxious.
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95. - Did you have to get a shot, Daddy?
- No, honey.
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96. - It's the start of something awful.
- Do I have to get a shot?
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97. - Course not.
- Did you tell him I have green poo?
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98. - It's fucked timing.
- Call the plumber. Hey.
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99. Sorry. I have rehearsal. Fuck.
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100. - Hey, come on.
- Sorry, sorry, sorry. Everybody, sorry.
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101. How many years
until I have to get more shots?
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102. - Not for a really long time, babe.
- A million years?
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103. - Remember what Dr. Woodman said...
- Dad, what's a plumber?
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104. - He's a man...
- Or a woman, Dad.
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105. Right. He's a man or a woman
who fixes sinks and toilets and...
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106. - Do you know what pipes are?
- No.
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107. - Hey, Jim. I had an accident.
- Like to smoke out of?
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108. A different kind of pipe, honey.
All right, bye.
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109. Houses have pipes,
and they're made of...
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110. They're like tubes,
and they're behind the walls...
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111. and they're under the floors
and everywhere.
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112. - And...
- What's the matter?
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113. - Every single where?
- It's okay, honey.
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114. They just carry water
to and from sinks and toilets.
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115. - It's like in your body. You have veins.
- Capillaries.
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116. Capillaries filled with blood.
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117. I have blood? I don't want blood.
I don't want blood.
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118. - What are you doing?
- Trying to explain plumbing.
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119. - Stop.
- I can't do this now.
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120. - Don't worry, you don't have blood.
- Don't tell her she doesn't have blood.
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121. - Caden, stop it.
- I don't want blood.
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122. Thanks for getting me in right away.
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123. - Was it the bump to the head?
- No.
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124. Could be, but I think we need
to get you to a neurologist.
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125. - Neurologist?
- It's a brain expert.
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126. I know what a neurologist is.
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127. - I thought from the way you asked...
- I just thought you said "urologist."
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128. - Why do I need to see a neurologist?
- Just for a look-see.
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129. The eyes are part of the brain,
after all.
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130. No, that's not true, is it?
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131. - Why would I say it if it weren't true?
- It doesn't seem right.
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132. Like morally correct,
or "right" as in accurate?
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133. I don't know. Accurate, I guess?
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134. Interesting.
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135. Now, when you kick off, boy,
I want a 70-yard boot.
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136. And get right down the field
under the ball.
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137. And when you hit, hit low and hit hard,
because it's important, boy.
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138. There's all kinds of important people
in the stands.
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139. And the first thing you know... Ben?
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140. Ben, where do I...?
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141. - Ben, how do I...?
- Willy, you coming up?
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142. Willy?
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143. Willy, answer me.
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144. Willy! No!
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145. - Oh, Jesus, come on.
- Oh, crap.
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146. Claire, are you okay?
What's happening here?
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147. It's too late in the game
to have these problems.
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148. - I know, Caden. I'm sorry. We'll get it.
- Oh, my God.
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149. - You okay?
- Yeah, I think the wig saved my life.
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150. - Yeah.
- It's okay, honestly.
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151. That was good, Tom.
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152. - Yeah?
- Yeah.
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153. I was trying something different.
I was crashing differently.
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154. - Ambivalently.
- Yeah, I saw that. I liked it.
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155. Try to keep in mind that
a young person playing Willy Loman...
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156. thinks he's only pretending
to be at the end of a life full of despair.
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157. But the tragedy is that we know
that you, the young actor...
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158. will end up in this very place
of desolation.
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159. Okay.
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160. That's great.
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161. - Let's try it again. How long, David?
- I think 15.
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162. Anything?
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163. So now what?
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164. - Hey.
- Hey.
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165. - In search of the elusive signal.
- The signal's good here, oddly.
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166. - That is odd.
- I know. Cell phones, they're crazy.
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167. - See you in a few.
- Yep.
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168. Yeah, Dr. Heshborg said
I should see a Dr. Scoriano.
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169. My pupils don't work.
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170. I think I have blood in my stool.
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171. That stool in your office?
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172. - When I was pregnant with Olive.
- What was it like?
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173. I don't know. Hopeful or something.
Like something was gonna change.
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174. - Yeah, something did. No?
- Yeah.
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175. - Yeah, of course.
- I mean, big time.
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176. I mean, maybe not as much
as I'd hoped.
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177. I'm sorry.
That's a terrible thing to say.
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178. There are no terrible things to say
in here, only true and false.
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179. - Can I say something awful?
- Yes, please do.
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180. I've fantasized about Caden dying.
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181. Being able to start again, guilt-free.
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182. I know that's... That's bad.
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183. - Caden, does that feel terrible?
- Yeah.
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184. Okay, good.
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185. It's a nightmare in there.
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186. I'm sorry.
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187. So, I'm reading The Trial.
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188. - Yeah?
- Yeah.
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189. - You like?
- Love.
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190. I'm such an idiot
for not knowing about this book.
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191. - It's famous, as it turns out.
- Yeah.
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192. You're not an idiot.
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193. Then you say:
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194. "In fact, Hazel, you're very bright,
and I love your eyes."
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195. - In fact, Hazel, you're very bright.
- Oh, am I?
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196. - And I love your eyes.
- Do you? Oh, you're a darling.
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197. Then what do I say?
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198. - I can't say what then you say.
- Why?
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199. Because it's dirty.
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200. Could you step out for a second?
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201. Go ahead. I've seen boy parts.
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202. - Can I take a piss in your sink?
- Yeah, sure. I guess.
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203. We're sold out.
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204. Great.
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205. Gorgeous.
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206. Thanks.
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207. - How was rehearsal?
- Awful.
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208. We have 560 lighting cues.
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209. - I don't why I make it so complicated.
- Because that's what you do.
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210. Yeah.
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211. We got through it though.
That's really pretty.
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212. Caden, I'm sorry, I...
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213. I can't come tonight. I'm sorry.
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214. I have two canvasses I have
to get ready to ship for tomorrow.
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215. - I know it sucks...
- It's opening night.
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216. I know. I wish I could come.
I would if I could.
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217. - I've gotta get ready.
- Tomorrow...
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218. I have to get ready.
I don't know what I'm gonna wear.
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219. I have to figure out
what I'm gonna wear.
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220. Hey.
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221. - Oh, boy, oh boy.
- Willy?
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222. It's all right, I came back.
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223. I hated myself tonight.
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224. - Plus, I'm so... Excuse me.
- Hey, Tom.
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225. I'm so bloated and enormous.
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226. No, you look good. You were great.
I was very pleased.
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227. - You okay?
- Sorry. A little bit of a headache.
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228. Willy Loman.
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229. I just wanted to say thank you
for everything.
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230. You've been absolutely brilliant.
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231. It's gonna be miserable
going ahead without you.
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232. - I'll be around. I'll check in.
- I'm such a baby.
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233. Okay. I'm gonna go get drunk,
that's what.
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234. Okay. Claire. Sweetheart.
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235. - Good. Good job.
- Oh, don't worry, I'll get better.
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236. - Good work.
- Don't worry, it'll get better.
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237. Hey. I figured I'd better get in fast.
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238. - Hey, you wanna sit?
- Yeah, yeah.
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239. - Where's El wife-o?
- Had to work.
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240. Her show in Berlin is in two weeks.
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241. We're gonna go there
for like a month.
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242. - Why do I like you so much?
- I couldn't begin to guess.
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243. Me neither.
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244. Do you get high, my friend?
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245. You know, sometimes.
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246. Do you want to now?
With me, in my car?
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247. I get kind of...
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248. something when I'm stoned.
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249. What does "something" mean?
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250. You know...
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251. bothered.
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252. - What does "bothered" mean?
- You know.
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253. Bothered. Horny.
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254. And me with a station wagon and all.
Could be dangerous.
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255. - Yeah, could be.
- You're absolutely zero fun.
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256. When are the reviews
gonna get here?
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257. Don't know.
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258. His best friends finger two babies...
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259. One this big, one this big.
and two kittens.
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260. - Hey.
- Hi, Caden. How'd it go?
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261. - Hi.
- Hi.
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262. It's late.
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263. Maria came over
to keep me company because...
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264. And we just lost track.
I got everything done.
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265. But I'm sorry I missed your play.
I'm sorry. But how'd it go?
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266. Great. We're a hit.
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267. Reviews are great.
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268. Times said it was brilliant casting
young people as Willy and Linda.
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269. - That's great, Caden. Good for you.
- Great.
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270. I can't wait to see it tomorrow.
That's... Tonight.
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271. That's great.
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272. Wow, it's really late... Early.
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273. Early.
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274. It's late.
Hey, I would love to see it too.
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275. - Can we get Maria a ticket?
- You're stoned.
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276. I mean, a little. It's, you know...
I don't know.
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277. But are you happy with it?
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278. Yeah. Yeah, I'd love for you to see...
To know what you think.
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279. It doesn't matter what I think.
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280. Absolutely. It's all about
your artistic satisfaction, Caden.
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281. - Congratulations.
- Yeah.
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282. - I've always loved this house.
- Yes, it's a wonderful place.
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283. The truth is, I never really imagined
I could afford it.
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284. Well, the sellers
are very motivated now.
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285. It's a scary decision.
I never thought I'd buy a house alone.
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286. But, you know, I'm 36,
and I wonder what it is I'm waiting for.
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287. - Home buying is always scary.
- And with the fire and all especially.
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288. Well, it's a good size though,
2200 square feet...
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289. not including
the partially finished basement.
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290. Oh, I don't know.
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291. - I'm thinking I should go.
- It's a perfect size for someone alone.
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292. I like it, I do. I'm just really concerned
about dying in the fire.
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293. It's a big decision
how one prefers to die.
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294. Would you like to meet my son?
Derek.
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295. Derek's living in the basement
since his divorce, if that's okay.
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296. Hey, Mom.
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297. - Let's go, Ma.
- I want just a minute.
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298. I never...
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299. Forgive me, dear. I can't cry.
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300. I don't know what it is,
but I can't cry.
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301. It seems to me
that you're just on another trip.
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302. I keep expecting you.
Why did you do it?
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303. I search and I search
and I can't understand it.
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304. I made the last payment
on the house today.
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305. We're free and clear.
We're free. We're free.
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306. - Well done.
- Bravo.
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307. - Well done. It was very successful.
- I thought it was wonderful.
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308. Why did the older people
look so young?
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309. It was a choice, Dad.
I'll explain later.
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310. I can't get excited about your restaging
someone else's old play, it just...
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311. There's nothing personal in it.
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312. People are coming out of the theater
crying.
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313. Great. Be a fucking tool
of suburban, blue-haired...
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314. regional-theater subscribers.
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315. - You didn't you think it was long?
- No.
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316. But what are you leaving behind?
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317. You act as if you have forever
to figure it out.
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318. When you're dead, there's no time.
The world is...
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319. I don't know.
I slept maybe three hours.
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320. So we're both tired.
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321. No, I cuddled with Olive all night.
It was great.
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322. Morning. Morning.
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323. - Morning, Caden.
- I think I might have arthritis.
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324. Friends on fire.
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325. I'm going to.
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326. No, I know exactly.
Okay, I will. I'll call you later.
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327. I know. You're right. Bye.
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328. My joints are stiff.
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329. Who was that?
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330. - Maria.
- Right.
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331. Three hours since you spoke.
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332. Caden, I think I wanna go to Berlin
with just Olive.
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333. - I think it would be good for us.
- Oh, Christ.
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334. Morning, kiddos.
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335. Why don't you want me to go?
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336. You know, I think it would be a good
thing for the two of us to do alone.
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337. How do you think I'm supposed
to respond to something like that?
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338. - Want me to zip your coat up?
- Yeah.
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339. What's wrong with your face,
Daddy?
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340. It's pustules.
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341. It's called sycosis.
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342. Spelled differently than "psychosis,"
but it sounds the same.
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343. I don't know what that means.
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344. Of course not.
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345. Well, there are two kinds of psychosis.
They're spelled differently.
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346. P-S-Y is like if you're crazy,
like Mama.
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347. S-Y is like these ugly things
on my face.
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348. - You could have both, though.
- I could, but I don't.
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349. Can I ask you something, Ad?
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350. Have I disappointed you somehow?
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351. I don't know what I'm doing.
We're just spending a little time apart.
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352. We'll talk when I get back, okay?
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353. Everyone is disappointing.
The more you know someone, it just...
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354. This whole romantic-love thing,
it's just a projection anyway, right?
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355. I mean, I don't know.
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356. I'm sorry. I'm sorry.
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357. I love you.
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358. I don't know what I'm doing.
I don't know.
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359. We'll talk when I get back.
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360. Okay?
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361. Flurostatin TR
allows you to live life...
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362. when it's your turn to face
the challenges of chemotherapy.
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363. Ask your doctor
if Flurostatin TR is right for you.
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364. and I'm on the first train
out of Palookaville.
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365. the Miracle Brush
can scour everything from bottles...
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366. - Rise and shine...
- Lift those legs...
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367. - I'm lonely.
- Yes. Anything else?
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368. - I'm hurt.
- Yes. And?
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369. I think Adele's right.
I'm not doing anything real...
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370. What would be real?
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371. I'm afraid I'm gonna die.
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372. I don't know what's wrong with me.
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373. I wanna do something important
while I'm still here.
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374. That would be the time to do it. I have
a book that might help you get better.
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375. - Better?
- It's called Getting Better.
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376. - Who wrote it?
- I did. All of these.
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377. - Wow, I never knew that.
- Yes. Well, wow, indeed.
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378. In conclusion... Cats eat rats...
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379. Within his own plumbing...
Me who am as a raw nerve...
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380. Synthetic vaginal juices...
Substantial crease...
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381. That's $45.
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382. Five. Five.
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383. Five.
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384. Some fives. That's not good.
Copy !req
385. Keep with the flossing.
We'll see you in three months.
Copy !req
386. Six. Six. Six.
Copy !req
387. I'm gonna recommend
you see a periodontist.
Copy !req
388. He'll probably recommend
gum surgery.
Copy !req
389. - Hello?
- Hey, I'm so glad I finally got you.
Copy !req
390. - Hello, who is this?
- It's Caden.
Copy !req
391. Ellen?
Copy !req
392. It's Caden. I can't wait to see you
and Olive on the 12th...
Copy !req
393. No, I have to go.
I'm sorry, there's a party. I'm famous.
Copy !req
394. Have fun...
Copy !req
395. 911, state your emergency.
Copy !req
396. - I'm sick! I'm sick!
- Ma'am?
Copy !req
397. Mr. Cotard?
Copy !req
398. Mr. Cotard.
Copy !req
399. You've had a seizure of sorts.
Copy !req
400. What does that mean?
Copy !req
401. Seems to be some synaptic
degradation, fungal in origin.
Copy !req
402. Autonomic functions
are going haywire.
Copy !req
403. You'll lose your ability
to salivate, cry, et cetera.
Copy !req
404. - Is it serious?
- We don't know. But, yes.
Copy !req
405. We'll get you enrolled
in some biofeedback program.
Copy !req
406. Maybe you can learn
some sort of manual override.
Copy !req
407. We should get a drink.
It would be fun.
Copy !req
408. - It would be weird.
- I like weird. I like you. See?
Copy !req
409. Anyway, I don't wanna
make you uncomfortable, I...
Copy !req
410. Okay, so I do
wanna make you uncomfortable.
Copy !req
411. And what do we do with all this?
Copy !req
412. You wanna come over to my place,
Cotard?
Copy !req
413. I won't let you off the hook this time
by saying, "Never mind."
Copy !req
414. Adele is only on vacation.
Copy !req
415. She hasn't called since she left.
It's been a year.
Copy !req
416. It's been a week.
Copy !req
417. I'm gonna buy you a calendar.
Copy !req
418. Okay.
Copy !req
419. Just for one drink.
Copy !req
420. Come on. Scraps for my scrapbook.
Copy !req
421. I can't... I really can't drink very much
because of my condition.
Copy !req
422. Did you put something in it?
Copy !req
423. If that's what it takes,
consider it done.
Copy !req
424. Love potion number 69.
Copy !req
425. - It's good.
- Does it make you wanna kiss me?
Copy !req
426. - Kind of.
- Tell me why.
Copy !req
427. Because I feel a lot of longing.
Copy !req
428. Beg a girl, why don't you?
Copy !req
429. - Please, Hazel.
- On your knees.
Copy !req
430. What?
Copy !req
431. I want you to beg me
on your knees for a kiss.
Copy !req
432. Just for fun.
Copy !req
433. Why am I doing this?
Copy !req
434. For fun, baby.
Copy !req
435. Will you help me
forget my troubles?
Copy !req
436. Oh, kiddo.
Copy !req
437. You don't even know.
Copy !req
438. - What?
- I don't know.
Copy !req
439. - What is it?
- I don't know, I'm sorry.
Copy !req
440. I'm sorry.
Copy !req
441. - What?
- I don't know, I'm just...
Copy !req
442. I'm just really confused.
Copy !req
443. I'm sorry.
Copy !req
444. I...
Copy !req
445. I'm really sick.
Copy !req
446. And I think I'm dying.
Copy !req
447. I have a kid, and I'm married.
Copy !req
448. I just thought
this might change things, you know?
Copy !req
449. I had a good time,
and I think you're a very nice person.
Copy !req
450. That is just the wrong thing
to say right now, Caden.
Copy !req
451. You should go.
Copy !req
452. Hazel. Leave a message or not.
It's your dime.
Copy !req
453. Hi. You know,
I haven't heard from you in a while...
Copy !req
454. and I just thought I'd call
and say hi.
Copy !req
455. Hi, Hazel.
Copy !req
456. Now. Now. Be here now.
Copy !req
457. Olive wanted me to ask you
not to read her diary.
Copy !req
458. She left it under her pillow
by mistake.
Copy !req
459. Dear Mr. Cotard,
it is my pleasure to inform you...
Copy !req
460. that you have been named
a 2009 MacArthur Fellow.
Copy !req
461. It is our hope that you will use
your newly found financial freedom...
Copy !req
462. to create something unflinchingly
true, profoundly beautiful...
Copy !req
463. and of unremitting value
to your community and to the world.
Copy !req
464. - I got this MacArthur grant.
- Oh, Caden.
Copy !req
465. - Yeah, a lot of money.
- Know what you're gonna do with it?
Copy !req
466. Theater piece.
Something big and true and tough.
Copy !req
467. I'm gonna finally put my real self
into something.
Copy !req
468. What is your real self, do you think?
Copy !req
469. I don't know yet.
Copy !req
470. The MacArthur is called
"the genius grant"...
Copy !req
471. and I wanna earn it.
Copy !req
472. That's wonderful. God bless.
Copy !req
473. I guess you'll have to discover
your real self, right?
Copy !req
474. Yeah.
Copy !req
475. I wanted to ask you, how old are kids
when they start to write?
Copy !req
476. There's an absolutely brilliant novel
written by a 4-year-old.
Copy !req
477. - Really?
- Little Winky by Horace Azpiazu.
Copy !req
478. - That's cute.
- Oh, hardly.
Copy !req
479. Little Winky
is a virulent anti-Semite.
Copy !req
480. The story follows his initiation
into the Klan...
Copy !req
481. his immersion
in the pornographic snuff industry...
Copy !req
482. and his ultimate degradation
at the hands of a black ex-convict...
Copy !req
483. named Eric Washington Jackson
Jones Johnson...
Copy !req
484. - Written by a 4-year-old?
- ... Jefferson.
Copy !req
485. Written by a 4-year-old?
Copy !req
486. Well, Azpiazu killed himself
when he was 5.
Copy !req
487. - Why did he kill himself?
- I don't know. Why did you?
Copy !req
488. What?
Copy !req
489. I said, why would you?
Copy !req
490. Oh, I don't know.
Copy !req
491. Yeah, I wanna bring my production
to New York...
Copy !req
492. to get it seen by people,
you know, who matter.
Copy !req
493. - The sooner the better.
- This theater, centrally located.
Copy !req
494. Heart of the theater district,
so, you know, great for plays.
Copy !req
495. - Yeah?
- Oh, yeah. Absolutely. There it is.
Copy !req
496. - What was this used for?
- Plays.
Copy !req
497. - Like, theater plays?
- Shakespeare.
Copy !req
498. King Lear.
Copy !req
499. The storm.
Copy !req
500. You see, the idea
is to do a massive theater piece.
Copy !req
501. You know, uncompromising, honest.
Copy !req
502. Here's what I think theater is.
It's the beginning of thought.
Copy !req
503. It's the truth not yet spoken.
Copy !req
504. It's what a man feels like
after he's been clocked in the jaw.
Copy !req
505. It's love in all its messiness.
Copy !req
506. You know, and I want all of us,
players and patrons alike...
Copy !req
507. to soak
in the communal bath of it...
Copy !req
508. the mikvah, as the Jews call it.
Copy !req
509. Because we're all in the same water,
after all.
Copy !req
510. You know, soaking
in our very menstrual blood...
Copy !req
511. and nocturnal emissions.
Copy !req
512. This is what I wanna try
to give people.
Copy !req
513. Okay, here you go.
Here's your salad.
Copy !req
514. - Here's your soup.
- Thanks.
Copy !req
515. - Thank you.
- Enjoy.
Copy !req
516. - What are you doing?
- Salivating.
Copy !req
517. The biofeedback training.
Copy !req
518. - So I was wondering if you'd help.
- In your box office?
Copy !req
519. No, as my assistant.
Copy !req
520. I'm not sure I can work with you,
Caden.
Copy !req
521. I'm kind of angry.
Copy !req
522. I just wanna normalize it.
Copy !req
523. I think we'd have a lot of fun
together.
Copy !req
524. I miss you.
Copy !req
525. - Really disturbing.
- I know.
Copy !req
526. Dear diary, thank you
for being my new best friend.
Copy !req
527. My name is Olive Cotard,
and I'm 4 years old.
Copy !req
528. I like chocolate,
and my favorite color is pink.
Copy !req
529. This is pink.
Copy !req
530. Yeah, that's good.
Copy !req
531. - Next.
- Hi.
Copy !req
532. We'll start by talking honestly...
Copy !req
533. and out of that,
a piece of theater will evolve.
Copy !req
534. I'll begin.
Copy !req
535. I've been thinking a lot
about dying lately.
Copy !req
536. - You're gonna be fine, sweetie.
- Well, I appreciate that, Claire, but...
Copy !req
537. You are, you poor thing.
Copy !req
538. Yeah, well, regardless of how
this particular thing works itself out...
Copy !req
539. I will be dying.
Copy !req
540. And so will you.
Copy !req
541. And so will everyone here.
Copy !req
542. And that's what I wanna explore.
Copy !req
543. We're all hurtling towards death.
Copy !req
544. Yet here we are,
for the moment, alive...
Copy !req
545. each of us knowing
we're gonna die...
Copy !req
546. each of us
secretly believing we won't.
Copy !req
547. It's brilliant.
Copy !req
548. It's everything.
Copy !req
549. It's Karamazov.
Copy !req
550. - Stop.
- I'm just asking.
Copy !req
551. - You're so obnoxious.
- You're so obnoxious.
Copy !req
552. - You do not wanna cross me.
- Don't I?
Copy !req
553. Hi, Claire.
Copy !req
554. - Hi.
- Hazel.
Copy !req
555. Yeah. No, no. I know, I know. Hazel.
You're the box office.
Copy !req
556. - Yeah, I'm the box office.
- How are you?
Copy !req
557. Wonderful. You?
Copy !req
558. Yeah, yeah. I'm good. I'm fine.
Thank you.
Copy !req
559. Actually, I'm meeting Caden here.
You know Mr. Cotard, right?
Copy !req
560. Yes, I recall Mr. Cotard.
Copy !req
561. Yeah. I'm waiting...
Copy !req
562. - Hey.
- Hi, Caden.
Copy !req
563. - Hi, Caden.
- Hi, Hazel. Hi, Claire.
Copy !req
564. Hi.
Copy !req
565. - This is Derek.
- Hi, Derek.
Copy !req
566. - Hi, Derek.
- Hi, Derek.
Copy !req
567. Hi.
Copy !req
568. Well, we'll leave you be.
It's nice to see you again.
Copy !req
569. - Take care.
- Why am I bowing? Okay, bye.
Copy !req
570. - That was awkward.
- Yeah, I guess.
Copy !req
571. Do you like beaver...?
Copy !req
572. So could you tell me maybe
what it is that you want from me?
Copy !req
573. You know, like, from my character.
Copy !req
574. Well, we'll build it over time
together.
Copy !req
575. You know, try to find a real person,
maybe, to model it after.
Copy !req
576. That Hazel girl's
kind of interesting maybe.
Copy !req
577. - You know, like, why...?
- Although...
Copy !req
578. Why is she still working
at a box office at her age?
Copy !req
579. I don't know.
Probably not that interesting.
Copy !req
580. Maybe she wanted to be an actress,
but she lacked the confidence.
Copy !req
581. - Yeah, we'll talk about it.
- I'm so excited.
Copy !req
582. Really? Why?
Copy !req
583. Because I think that it's brave.
Copy !req
584. And I just feel like
I'm gonna be part of a revolution.
Copy !req
585. I keep thinking about Artaud,
Krapp's Last Tape...
Copy !req
586. you know, and Grotowski,
for chrissake.
Copy !req
587. I don't know what I'm doing.
Copy !req
588. But that's what so refreshing.
Copy !req
589. Knowing that you don't know...
Copy !req
590. is the first and the most essential
step to knowing, you know?
Copy !req
591. I don't know.
Copy !req
592. - Well, I'm proud of you.
- Thanks.
Copy !req
593. - Don't say that, not to me.
- Oh, sorry.
Copy !req
594. My mother died last night.
Copy !req
595. Oh, my God. I'm so sorry.
What are you doing out?
Copy !req
596. - This is me.
- Well...
Copy !req
597. Well, it was nice meeting you.
Oh, God, did I just say "meeting"?
Copy !req
598. - I'm sorry. I'm so stupid.
- Slip of the tongue, is all.
Copy !req
599. Yeah, it's a Freudian slip, right?
Copy !req
600. I don't know how it's Freudian.
Copy !req
601. To meet, you know? Like, to meet.
Copy !req
602. There she met Ralph Keene.
They fell in love, married...
Copy !req
603. and soon their first child,
Claire, was born.
Copy !req
604. I used to be a baby.
Copy !req
605. Claire Elizabeth Keene
was a joyous child...
Copy !req
606. - I'm sorry.
- ... the apple of her mother's eye.
Copy !req
607. She made her parents proud with her
politeness and gymnastic skills.
Copy !req
608. God, you're beautiful.
Copy !req
609. When she was 7, little Claire
was bitten by the acting bug.
Copy !req
610. She starred
in almost every school musical...
Copy !req
611. playing Ado Annie in Oklahoma...
Copy !req
612. Adelaide in Guys And Dolls,
and Maria in The Sound Of Music.
Copy !req
613. I have to fuck you. I have to.
Copy !req
614. There will be no other before you.
Copy !req
615. I'd like to buy a ticket, please.
Copy !req
616. - Okay. Hold it.
- That'll be $40.
Copy !req
617. We're not really...
We need to investigate.
Copy !req
618. You know, to really discover
the essence of each being.
Copy !req
619. You know, I think I need to work
with both of you separately.
Copy !req
620. Davis, I'll start with you.
Copy !req
621. I liked the beginning.
I don't wanna see a good scene...
Copy !req
622. "Davis, I'll start with you"?
Copy !req
623. There's a difference between favoring
me and pretending we've never met.
Copy !req
624. I mean, we've had Ariel.
I think people know that we've fucked.
Copy !req
625. We'll talk about your character
after we put Ariel to bed, okay?
Copy !req
626. Okay.
Copy !req
627. I think I made a breakthrough.
Copy !req
628. - This character is so beautiful...
- Yeah, I have to go find my daughter.
Copy !req
629. - Your daughter's right here.
- My real daughter.
Copy !req
630. - Excuse me?
- I mean, my first daughter, Olive.
Copy !req
631. - I have to go find her.
- Please don't do this to us.
Copy !req
632. She's tattooed. She's tattooed.
Copy !req
633. Oh, everyone is tattooed.
Copy !req
634. Oh, I've never seen that before.
Copy !req
635. - You have responsibilities.
- Yeah, I'll be quick. I'll do it quick.
Copy !req
636. Redundancy is fluid.
Life moves to the south.
Copy !req
637. There is only the now,
and I am always with you.
Copy !req
638. For example, look to your left.
Copy !req
639. Hi.
Copy !req
640. When you canceled, it freed me up,
so I'm traveling too.
Copy !req
641. You know,
I'm not sure I'm getting the book.
Copy !req
642. Oh, but it's getting you.
You're almost non-recognizable now.
Copy !req
643. Thank you.
Copy !req
644. I show you my leg. I stand close,
and you inhale my perfume.
Copy !req
645. I offer my ripe flower to you
and you deny it.
Copy !req
646. This book is over.
Copy !req
647. Hi.
Copy !req
648. I don't speak German.
Copy !req
649. Yeah, yeah. I may help you, mister?
Copy !req
650. I'm looking for Adele Cotard.
Adele Lack.
Copy !req
651. We must not give addresses
or other personal informations.
Copy !req
652. - I'm her husband.
- No, you are not her husbands...
Copy !req
653. which is named Gunther
und Heinz.
Copy !req
654. I'm the father of her daughter, Olive.
Copy !req
655. I see. I'm sorry, I cannot help you.
Copy !req
656. Dear diary, Germany is wonderful.
So many friends here.
Copy !req
657. My new dads are great
and handsome...
Copy !req
658. and brilliant directors of theater.
Copy !req
659. Hello.
Copy !req
660. You're here?
Copy !req
661. Yeah. I live with Adele and Olive
and Gunther and Heinz...
Copy !req
662. and Uschi and Britt.
I'm everyone's nanny.
Copy !req
663. I wanna see my daughter.
Copy !req
664. - Yeah, they sent me.
- They?
Copy !req
665. Who are they?
Who the fuck are Uschi and Britt?
Copy !req
666. Yeah, they decided it's not time
to see you yet.
Copy !req
667. They decided? Who decided?
They had her tattooed.
Copy !req
668. Oh, I did that. Olive is my project...
Copy !req
669. She's a 4-year-old!
Copy !req
670. She's a fucking 4-year-old!
Copy !req
671. She's almost over 11 now.
Copy !req
672. She's my muse.
Copy !req
673. I love her.
Copy !req
674. You don't love her!
Copy !req
675. Where is she?
Copy !req
676. What did you do to my daughter?
Copy !req
677. Death comes faster than you think.
Copy !req
678. - That was your last patient for the day.
- Let's stop this charade.
Copy !req
679. I don't know
what you're talking about, doctor.
Copy !req
680. You're actually having an affair
off set.
Copy !req
681. - Palpable, huh?
- Oh, okay.
Copy !req
682. - Who told you?
- And it's not good.
Copy !req
683. - Not good, oh, okay.
- You're actors playing actors.
Copy !req
684. You're in this scene, you're not
just filming it. You're in this scene.
Copy !req
685. Just like that...
Copy !req
686. As you're telling him this,
you realize you're attracted to him.
Copy !req
687. How are you gonna let him know?
Copy !req
688. And the guilt you feel about telling him
about somebody else knowing.
Copy !req
689. Daddy, Daddy is mine.
Copy !req
690. Daddy can't play now, honey.
Copy !req
691. Daddy doesn't live with us anymore,
baby. He had to go find himself.
Copy !req
692. They still feel a little tight in the toe.
Copy !req
693. Have an argument.
You're having an argument. Have it.
Copy !req
694. - I don't buy it.
- You, sir, are a horse's ass.
Copy !req
695. What? Just get the fucking shoe.
You gave me two sizes too big.
Copy !req
696. Tom, don't turn into another person
just because I say change your action.
Copy !req
697. And this started just today?
It never happened before?
Copy !req
698. Okay. Good.
Copy !req
699. You can get dressed.
Copy !req
700. I mean, you're a doctor, right?
Am I dying? Can you tell me that?
Copy !req
701. - No.
- No, you can't tell me?
Copy !req
702. - I can't tell you.
- You can't tell me if you can't tell me?
Copy !req
703. - No.
- No, you can't tell me...
Copy !req
704. - ... because you're not allowed to?
- No.
Copy !req
705. - Caden.
- What are you doing here?
Copy !req
706. I was wondering
if I was gonna bump into you.
Copy !req
707. - You look great.
- Thanks.
Copy !req
708. - Is that a new haircut?
- Yeah. For a while now.
Copy !req
709. What are you doing in New York?
Copy !req
710. I'm here with Derek and the boys.
A mini vacation.
Copy !req
711. - The boys?
- Yeah. I thought you knew.
Copy !req
712. - How old?
- Five.
Copy !req
713. Twins. Robert and Daniel and Alan.
Copy !req
714. Yes.
Copy !req
715. They're nice names.
Where are they?
Copy !req
716. Derek took them to the Natural History
so I could shop.
Copy !req
717. It's so good to see you, Caden.
I... How are things?
Copy !req
718. You know, I was with Claire.
Copy !req
719. And we have a daughter.
But we're separated.
Copy !req
720. How about with you?
Copy !req
721. Good. I have a great job
at Lens Shapers.
Copy !req
722. Shapers. Great. You wear a lab coat.
Copy !req
723. - It's so good to see you.
- Oh, good to see you, Hazel.
Copy !req
724. Hey! What are you doing?
Copy !req
725. - I got you.
- Let me go.
Copy !req
726. How I love Maria.
Copy !req
727. She is so much more of a father
than Caden ever was...
Copy !req
728. with his drinking and unfortunate
body odor and rotting teeth.
Copy !req
729. I could only loathe him,
and perhaps pity him.
Copy !req
730. But Maria.
Copy !req
731. I wanna come back.
Copy !req
732. I wanna take care of you and Olive.
Ariel. Ariel. Fuck.
Copy !req
733. Ariel.
Copy !req
734. No, no, no, it's so late. Please.
Copy !req
735. No, no, no. Please.
Copy !req
736. Hello?
Copy !req
737. Okay.
Copy !req
738. My father died.
Copy !req
739. Oh, baby.
Copy !req
740. They said his body was riddled
with cancer and that he didn't know.
Copy !req
741. That he went in
because his finger hurt.
Copy !req
742. They said he suffered horribly.
Copy !req
743. And that he...
Copy !req
744. That he called out for me
before he died.
Copy !req
745. They said that he said
he regretted his life.
Copy !req
746. And they said he said a lot of things.
Copy !req
747. Too many to recount.
Copy !req
748. They said it was the longest...
Copy !req
749. and saddest deathbed speech
any of them had ever heard.
Copy !req
750. There was so little left of him...
Copy !req
751. they had to fill the coffin
with cotton balls...
Copy !req
752. to keep him from rattling around.
Copy !req
753. I'm really sorry for your loss.
Copy !req
754. Thank you.
Can you excuse me a moment?
Copy !req
755. - Of course.
- I need to use the bathroom.
Copy !req
756. - All right.
- Okay.
Copy !req
757. God bless you and your family.
Copy !req
758. God bless you. Will you excuse me?
Copy !req
759. It's Hazel. Leave a message or not.
It's your dime.
Copy !req
760. It's left five people dead.
Copy !req
761. Sorry.
Copy !req
762. - Caden?
- Hi, Derek.
Copy !req
763. Officials suspect arson.
Copy !req
764. In other news,
German pharmaceutical giant...
Copy !req
765. has won its libel suit
against patients...
Copy !req
766. claiming chromosomal damage
from use of the arthritis medication...
Copy !req
767. Will you just tell me what to do?
Copy !req
768. In Pakistan today, the government...
Copy !req
769. Caden, everyone has to figure out
their own life, you know.
Copy !req
770. I just want you to look at me
the way you used to.
Copy !req
771. Oh, honey, I can't anymore.
Copy !req
772. You know I'm sorry.
Copy !req
773. I screwed everything up,
and I don't have any courage.
Copy !req
774. - And I'm sorry.
- Caden.
Copy !req
775. - I'm okay.
- I don't want you to be okay.
Copy !req
776. I mean, I do, but it just...
Copy !req
777. It rips my guts out.
Copy !req
778. I'll help you through any way I can.
Copy !req
779. And I'll help you through too.
Copy !req
780. I'm fine.
Copy !req
781. I have Derek.
Copy !req
782. Okay, I'm going.
Copy !req
783. Honey, I'm coming.
Copy !req
784. Dear diary, today I felt a wetness
between my legs.
Copy !req
785. Maria explained to me
now I am a woman.
Copy !req
786. And being a woman is wonderful
with Maria to guide me.
Copy !req
787. Olive?
Copy !req
788. Olive.
Copy !req
789. Olive, it's Daddy.
Copy !req
790. Olive, it's Daddy.
Copy !req
791. Olive, it's Daddy! Olive, it's Daddy!
Copy !req
792. Don't fucking stare at me! Olive!
Copy !req
793. Get off! It's my daughter!
That's my daughter!
Copy !req
794. Get off! Get off!
Copy !req
795. I won't settle for anything less
than the brutal truth.
Copy !req
796. Brutal. Brutal.
Copy !req
797. Each day I'll hand you a paper. It'll tell
you what happened to you that day.
Copy !req
798. You felt a lump in your breast.
Copy !req
799. You looked at your wife
and saw a stranger, et cetera.
Copy !req
800. - Caden?
- What?
Copy !req
801. When are we gonna
get an audience in here?
Copy !req
802. It's been 17 years.
Copy !req
803. All right, I'm not excusing myself
from this either.
Copy !req
804. I will have someone play me...
Copy !req
805. to delve into the murky,
cowardly depths...
Copy !req
806. of my lonely, fucked-up being.
Copy !req
807. And he'll get notes too,
and those notes will correspond...
Copy !req
808. to the notes I truly receive
every day from my god.
Copy !req
809. Get to work!
Copy !req
810. They fired me.
Copy !req
811. - I caused an outbreak of conjunctivitis.
- Oh, God.
Copy !req
812. I didn't wash my hands.
I had pinkeye hands.
Copy !req
813. - Oh, God.
- I'm a stupid cow.
Copy !req
814. Fucking private Christian school
is killing us. You know, it's not cheap.
Copy !req
815. It's Derek's thing.
I don't believe in that shit, you know.
Copy !req
816. You try to be a good person.
I mean, that's all there is.
Copy !req
817. Do you have anything for me,
Caden?
Copy !req
818. I mean, I already have an assistant.
Copy !req
819. - I don't have a box office yet, but...
- Please, Caden.
Copy !req
820. Please, Caden. I...
Copy !req
821. Please, Caden.
Copy !req
822. Sammy Barnathan?
Copy !req
823. Sit. Sammy Barnathan.
Copy !req
824. I don't have a résumé or a picture.
Copy !req
825. - I've never worked as an actor.
- Good. Tell me why you're here.
Copy !req
826. Well, I've been...
Copy !req
827. I've been following you for 20 years.
Copy !req
828. So I knew about this audition
because I follow you.
Copy !req
829. And I've learned everything about you
by following you.
Copy !req
830. So hire me,
and you'll see who you truly are.
Copy !req
831. Peekaboo.
Copy !req
832. Okay.
Copy !req
833. Hazel, I don't think we need to talk to
anyone else. This guy has me down.
Copy !req
834. I'm gonna cast him right now.
Then maybe you and I can get a drink.
Copy !req
835. And we can try to figure out
this thing between us...
Copy !req
836. why I cried.
Copy !req
837. Because I've never felt about anybody
the way I feel about you.
Copy !req
838. And I wanna fuck you
until we merge into a chimera...
Copy !req
839. a mythical beast with penis
and vagina eternally fused...
Copy !req
840. two pairs of eyes
that look only at each other...
Copy !req
841. and lips ever touching.
Copy !req
842. And one voice that whispers to itself.
Copy !req
843. Okay.
Copy !req
844. Yeah. You've got the part.
Copy !req
845. I've never seen your shit gray.
Copy !req
846. It's new.
Copy !req
847. That's a good boy.
Copy !req
848. - When is it opening?
- When it's ready.
Copy !req
849. - We need to get in. It's bad out here.
- Sorry.
Copy !req
850. You know, I was thinking
of calling it Simulacrum.
Copy !req
851. I don't even know what it means.
Copy !req
852. Can I have a nickel if I doesn't play
with my pee-pee no more?
Copy !req
853. Yeah.
Copy !req
854. How about
The Flawed Light of Love and Grief?
Copy !req
855. I'm not sure.
Copy !req
856. Claire, I want you to play yourself.
Copy !req
857. Sammy's gonna move
into your apartment set as me.
Copy !req
858. It would be my honor
to play your husband, Claire.
Copy !req
859. You're an amazing actress.
Copy !req
860. No, I saw you do Bernarda Alba
last year at the Roundabout.
Copy !req
861. Yeah?
Copy !req
862. That was a fun play.
Copy !req
863. Emotionally, it was tough,
but fucking fulfilling.
Copy !req
864. Plus, I loved working
with so many strong female actresses.
Copy !req
865. I'm gonna start thinking
about myself.
Copy !req
866. Start, huh?
Copy !req
867. Who is Claire Keen?
Claire Keen. Claire Keen.
Copy !req
868. - Why did we leave Adele, Caden?
- Claire Keen. Well...
Copy !req
869. She left us.
Copy !req
870. You know that better than anybody.
Copy !req
871. Except me.
Copy !req
872. An amazing artist though.
The best living artist.
Copy !req
873. I mean, there's no one who stares
the truth in the face like she does.
Copy !req
874. Sweet pussy too.
Copy !req
875. How do you know that?
Copy !req
876. I read it.
Copy !req
877. Anyway...
Copy !req
878. I mean, I don't know where she is.
Copy !req
879. Well, maybe she's got a sublet
in New York.
Copy !req
880. Maybe she's got a retrospective
at the Met. Maybe, baby.
Copy !req
881. Why are you giving me this?
Copy !req
882. I wanna follow you there and see
how you lose even more of yourself.
Copy !req
883. Research.
Copy !req
884. You know, for the part.
Copy !req
885. Partner.
Copy !req
886. Hold it. Hold it, please.
Copy !req
887. Hold it, please.
Copy !req
888. I asked you to hold the door.
Copy !req
889. I'm sorry. I pressed the button,
but I think it was too late.
Copy !req
890. You didn't press it.
Copy !req
891. - Have a good night.
- Yeah, thanks.
Copy !req
892. - Are you Ellen? Ellen?
- What?
Copy !req
893. - Are you Ellen Bascomb?
- What?
Copy !req
894. I'm to give the key to 31Y
to Ellen Bascomb.
Copy !req
895. Yes, I'm Ellen.
Copy !req
896. She said you should just go ahead
and get started.
Copy !req
897. - And don't forget to change the sheets.
- Okay, thanks.
Copy !req
898. Oh, sweetheart.
Copy !req
899. Adele?
Copy !req
900. Adele?
Copy !req
901. Hi, Ellen. Be a doll and do the sheets
and whatever's in the hamper.
Copy !req
902. Your money's under the toaster.
Kisses, Adele.
Copy !req
903. P.S. Bag of stuff in bedroom closet
for Goodwill. Take what you want.
Copy !req
904. Went for a walk. I had to think.
Copy !req
905. All night?
Copy !req
906. You smell weird.
Are you wearing lipstick?
Copy !req
907. No.
Copy !req
908. What do I smell like?
Copy !req
909. Like bad? Like an old person?
Copy !req
910. I don't know.
Like mold and cleaning products.
Copy !req
911. Like you're menstruating.
I don't know.
Copy !req
912. Menstruating?
Copy !req
913. You tell me.
Copy !req
914. I don't menstruate. I don't know how
I could smell like I'm menstruating.
Copy !req
915. I wouldn't know.
Copy !req
916. I don't like the guy you got
to play you.
Copy !req
917. You don't like Sammy? Why?
I think he's good.
Copy !req
918. Fuck you. I'm 45 years old.
I don't wanna do this shit anymore.
Copy !req
919. He's the best thing in the play
except you.
Copy !req
920. He's coming on to me.
He's grabbing my ass in rehearsal.
Copy !req
921. - He's your husband.
- Good, Jimmy.
Copy !req
922. He's not my goddamn husband.
You are.
Copy !req
923. What the fuck is wrong with you?
Copy !req
924. - I'm going to rehearsal.
- It's about the play.
Copy !req
925. - We're getting at something real here.
- That's great, you guys.
Copy !req
926. Beautiful, Sammy.
Copy !req
927. - Caden? Time-out?
- Yeah.
Copy !req
928. What's up?
Copy !req
929. Well, I feel we need a Hazel in here.
Copy !req
930. I mean, there's a whole side of Caden
I can't explore without a Hazel.
Copy !req
931. - I guess, yeah.
- I get to be a character?
Copy !req
932. Yeah.
Copy !req
933. Hi, Ellen.
Crackerjack job last night.
Copy !req
934. Would you do sheets again?
Copy !req
935. We had quite a fuck,
and it's musky and gross. Kisses, A.
Copy !req
936. Hi, Adele. Relined the cabinets.
Copy !req
937. I just wanted to let you know
I won a MacArthur Grant.
Copy !req
938. And I'm mounting a play which
I think is gonna be pure and truthful.
Copy !req
939. Best, Ellen.
Copy !req
940. I went for a walk. I had to think.
Copy !req
941. Caden, what are you doing at night?
Copy !req
942. I have a right to fucking know.
Copy !req
943. I've been going to Adele's place.
Copy !req
944. And cleaning it.
Copy !req
945. Do you have any idea
what I've given up for you? For this?
Copy !req
946. For you? For you?
Could you please get that?
Copy !req
947. - This looks serious. Am I interrupting?
- What's going on, Hazel?
Copy !req
948. I just wanted you to know
that the actress playing me...
Copy !req
949. is ready to start today.
Copy !req
950. That's great. That's all we need
around here, is two Hazels.
Copy !req
951. Okay, I'll take that as my cue.
Copy !req
952. - Maybe you could clean her toilet.
- Maybe I will.
Copy !req
953. This is over.
Copy !req
954. - No, Claire...
- I'm not talking to you.
Copy !req
955. I didn't say I was gonna
clean Hazel's toilet. He did.
Copy !req
956. - But you thought it!
- I thought it, but I didn't say it.
Copy !req
957. I got an offer to do
Needleman in a Haystack.
Copy !req
958. And I'm gonna take it.
I want you out of the apartment.
Copy !req
959. The real one. You can keep this one.
Copy !req
960. Claire.
Copy !req
961. Jesus. Claire.
Copy !req
962. Hi, yeah, we're gonna need
a Claire replacement.
Copy !req
963. Claire, I didn't say it.
Copy !req
964. I already put out a call
for a Claire replacement.
Copy !req
965. But I'm afraid
I'm gonna have to move on.
Copy !req
966. Just like that?
You don't give a guy even a chance?
Copy !req
967. I'm not a chance-giving girl.
I'm a fun-loving girl, remember?
Copy !req
968. I try and be fun-loving, see?
Copy !req
969. Sorry.
Copy !req
970. My analyst says
you have complexes.
Copy !req
971. Once you enjoyed
Needleman's complexes.
Copy !req
972. - That's before my analyst taught me...
- This is the last of my stuff.
Copy !req
973. - Bye.
- Bye. From the top?
Copy !req
974. Oh, Needleman,
you had such potential.
Copy !req
975. But I'm afraid
I'm gonna have to move on.
Copy !req
976. I'm sorry. Okay.
Copy !req
977. Oh, Needleman,
you had such potential.
Copy !req
978. But I'm afraid
I'm going to have to move on.
Copy !req
979. Just like that?
You don't give a guy a chance?
Copy !req
980. I'm not a chance-giving girl.
I'm a fun-loving girl.
Copy !req
981. Once you enjoyed
Needleman's complexes.
Copy !req
982. That's before my analyst taught me...
Copy !req
983. This is a lie.
Copy !req
984. Come here.
I try to be fun-loving, see?
Copy !req
985. - She told me your hatred of...
- Will.
Copy !req
986. Wall it up. All of it.
Copy !req
987. Claire.
Copy !req
988. Oh, Needleman.
Copy !req
989. All right.
Copy !req
990. Good for you with your grant.
Copy !req
991. Listen, I fixed up the walk-in
as a sort of bedroom if you want.
Copy !req
992. We'd love to have you...
Copy !req
993. and you wouldn't have to schlep
all the way to Queens.
Copy !req
994. It's just a thought. Kisses, A.
Copy !req
995. Dear diary, I'm afraid I'm gravely ill.
Copy !req
996. It is perhaps times like these
that one reflects on things past.
Copy !req
997. An article of clothing
from when I was young.
Copy !req
998. A green jacket.
A walk with my father.
Copy !req
999. A game we once played.
Pretend we're fairies.
Copy !req
1000. I'm a girl fairy,
and my name is Lauralee...
Copy !req
1001. and you're a boy fairy,
and your name is Teetery.
Copy !req
1002. Pretend when we're fairies,
we fight each other.
Copy !req
1003. And I say, "Stop hitting me or I'll die."
And you hit me again, and I say:
Copy !req
1004. "Now I have to die."
And you say, "But I'll miss you."
Copy !req
1005. And I say, "But I have to.
Copy !req
1006. And you'll have to wait a million years
to see me again.
Copy !req
1007. And I'll be put in a box...
Copy !req
1008. and all I'll need
is a tiny glass of water...
Copy !req
1009. and lots of tiny pieces of pizza.
Copy !req
1010. And the box will have wings
like an airplane."
Copy !req
1011. And you ask,
"Where will it take you?"
Copy !req
1012. "Home, " I say.
Copy !req
1013. This is to hear.
Copy !req
1014. - So words... English here, yeah?
- Okay.
Copy !req
1015. I'm dying...
Copy !req
1016. as I'm sure Maria told you.
Copy !req
1017. The flower tattoos have become
infected and they're dying.
Copy !req
1018. So I am as well. This is life.
Copy !req
1019. It's Maria. She did this.
Copy !req
1020. Maria gave me a reason to live
once you left.
Copy !req
1021. The flowers defined me.
Copy !req
1022. Your mother and Maria
took you away.
Copy !req
1023. I've tried for years to find you.
I didn't leave you.
Copy !req
1024. I want to talk to you
about your homosexuality.
Copy !req
1025. - I'm not a homosexual.
- Maria said you would deny it.
Copy !req
1026. Well, she's a liar. She's lying to you.
Copy !req
1027. I had the same struggle
when I first fell in love with Maria...
Copy !req
1028. and we began to have dirty,
aching sex.
Copy !req
1029. Maria is your lover?
Copy !req
1030. Of course.
She introduced me to myself...
Copy !req
1031. to my vagina and to hers.
Copy !req
1032. You have no idea how evil she is.
Copy !req
1033. I need to forgive you before I die...
Copy !req
1034. but I can't forgive someone
who has not asked for forgiveness.
Copy !req
1035. - I just want...
- I have no time.
Copy !req
1036. I need you to ask for forgiveness.
Copy !req
1037. Can you ever forgive me?
Copy !req
1038. - For what?
- For abandoning you.
Copy !req
1039. For abandoning you
to have anal sex...
Copy !req
1040. with my homosexual lover, Eric.
Copy !req
1041. I will, I'll say it.
Copy !req
1042. For abandoning you...
Copy !req
1043. to have anal sex
with my homosexual lover, Eric.
Copy !req
1044. No.
Copy !req
1045. No, I'm sorry.
Copy !req
1046. I cannot.
Copy !req
1047. I hope you are happy, faggot.
Copy !req
1048. I'm not happy. I'm not happy.
Copy !req
1049. I've talked to you before. This is not
a play about dating. It's about death.
Copy !req
1050. Make it personal. Move along.
Copy !req
1051. He doesn't need to yell at them.
Copy !req
1052. It is a play about dating.
It's not a play just about death.
Copy !req
1053. It's about everything.
Copy !req
1054. Dating, birth, death, life, family...
Copy !req
1055. all that.
Copy !req
1056. - This doesn't look real.
- What?
Copy !req
1057. - It's not real.
- I can't hear you.
Copy !req
1058. - Morning, Haze.
- Hi, Caden. How was your night?
Copy !req
1059. It was okay. Yours?
Copy !req
1060. Phillip was colicky.
I was up all night.
Copy !req
1061. - Oh, sorry.
- Sorry.
Copy !req
1062. - Everybody here?
- Sammy's not here.
Copy !req
1063. Jimmy called and said
there's some subway problem.
Copy !req
1064. Sorry. Sorry.
Copy !req
1065. - Hi, Hazel.
- Hi, Sammy.
Copy !req
1066. Sammy likes you.
Copy !req
1067. I need you to build this.
This is just the facade.
Copy !req
1068. It's Adele's place.
We'll be casting an Ellen.
Copy !req
1069. I can give you the interiors later.
Copy !req
1070. A few days?
Copy !req
1071. - Can I look again?
- A slight shift in perspective on this.
Copy !req
1072. Millicent Weems?
Copy !req
1073. - Caden, this is...
- Hazel, what do you think of this title?
Copy !req
1074. Unknown, Unkissed and Lost?
Copy !req
1075. Anyway, this is Millicent Weems.
Copy !req
1076. Have a seat.
Copy !req
1077. How are you at cleaning?
Copy !req
1078. - Very, very good at it.
- This part requires a lot of it.
Copy !req
1079. You'd be playing a cleaning lady.
Copy !req
1080. I played Egga, the cleaning lady,
in Hedda Gabler at the Roundabout.
Copy !req
1081. Great. Okay.
Copy !req
1082. And Mrs. Dobson in Scrub-A-Dub
at the Pantages.
Copy !req
1083. You're weirdly close
to what I visualize for this character.
Copy !req
1084. Glad to be weirdly close.
Copy !req
1085. Sorry, everybody.
Copy !req
1086. - Maurice, what's going on?
- I'm sorry.
Copy !req
1087. We have a couple of new guys on.
We're not in sync yet.
Copy !req
1088. - We good to go?
- Yes, sir.
Copy !req
1089. I'm sorry.
Copy !req
1090. Fuck.
Copy !req
1091. Are you Ellen?
Are you Ellen Bascomb?
Copy !req
1092. Shit.
Copy !req
1093. Line, please?
Copy !req
1094. Ellen... "What?"
Copy !req
1095. Right, right. What?
Copy !req
1096. I'm to give the key to 31Y
to Ellen Bascomb.
Copy !req
1097. Yes, I'm Ellen.
Copy !req
1098. Oh, dear. It's the wrong key.
Copy !req
1099. I'll be in, in a second.
Copy !req
1100. - Did you hear that?
- What?
Copy !req
1101. - You're breaking the fourth wall.
- This is the wrong key.
Copy !req
1102. - I'm supposed to open the door.
- Hold on.
Copy !req
1103. - Are you in there?
- There's no one in there.
Copy !req
1104. - Adele?
- Caden.
Copy !req
1105. I don't think it's... It's not quite...
Copy !req
1106. I'm jumping in the shower.
I'll be out in a second.
Copy !req
1107. Do you want some coffee?
I can make a fresh pot.
Copy !req
1108. Did you look at the new painting
on my easel? What do you think?
Copy !req
1109. Hey, thanks for the fuck
this morning.
Copy !req
1110. - People don't walk like that.
- What? Is it too...?
Copy !req
1111. No, just walk like yourself.
Copy !req
1112. Watch. Watch this.
Copy !req
1113. I gotta go.
Copy !req
1114. Watch this.
Copy !req
1115. Where's Hazel and Sammy?
Copy !req
1116. Sammy.
Copy !req
1117. Sammy. Sammy.
Copy !req
1118. - Hi, Caden.
- What are you doing?
Copy !req
1119. I was being you.
Copy !req
1120. You know, you like Hazel,
I like Hazel.
Copy !req
1121. This Hazel doesn't exist for you. If you
wanna like a Hazel, like that one.
Copy !req
1122. That's what I tried to tell him.
Copy !req
1123. No harm, no foul, Caden.
It's equity break anyway.
Copy !req
1124. Ten minutes, everybody!
Copy !req
1125. - Hazel.
- What?
Copy !req
1126. - You don't like him, do you?
- Yeah, he reminds me of you.
Copy !req
1127. I'm me. You don't need someone
to remind you of me.
Copy !req
1128. Oh, don't worry, Caden.
I like you more.
Copy !req
1129. I do. It's just, Sammy's fun.
Copy !req
1130. - I'm fun.
- Oh, sweetie, no, you're not.
Copy !req
1131. Hold on a sec. Yes?
Copy !req
1132. - Is this Caden Cotard?
- Yes.
Copy !req
1133. This is Officer Melnin
of Schenectady P.D.
Copy !req
1134. I'm sorry to inform you your mother's
been the victim of a home invasion.
Copy !req
1135. - What does that mean?
- She is dead.
Copy !req
1136. Was my father standing with us?
Copy !req
1137. I don't know what he looks like.
Copy !req
1138. He's dead.
Copy !req
1139. - So he looks dead, I guess.
- Probably wasn't him, then.
Copy !req
1140. He was a big guy.
Copy !req
1141. Anyway...
Copy !req
1142. Thanks for coming with me.
Copy !req
1143. That's okay.
Copy !req
1144. I asked Hazel...
Copy !req
1145. but she was busy tonight,
and you're the next best thing.
Copy !req
1146. I mean, it's not
that you're the next best thing...
Copy !req
1147. but because you play her,
it feels comforting.
Copy !req
1148. Does that make sense?
Copy !req
1149. Although the thing is,
off-stage you're nothing like her.
Copy !req
1150. But you play her very well, though.
Copy !req
1151. Did Hazel mention
what she was doing tonight?
Copy !req
1152. Because I called her house
before we left...
Copy !req
1153. and her husband told me
she wasn't gonna be back till late.
Copy !req
1154. And I just thought that was weird
because she said Phillip was sick.
Copy !req
1155. She's having dinner with Sammy.
Copy !req
1156. - That's interesting.
- He's supposed to like me.
Copy !req
1157. I'll have another talk with him.
Copy !req
1158. Will you excuse me?
I need to go to the bathroom.
Copy !req
1159. Don't forget your phone.
Copy !req
1160. Thanks, Yammy.
Copy !req
1161. It's Hazel. Leave a message or not.
It's your dime.
Copy !req
1162. You can stay in my parents' room.
Copy !req
1163. I thought someone
would have cleaned it up.
Copy !req
1164. Who?
Copy !req
1165. I don't know. Someone.
Copy !req
1166. This is my room.
You can sleep here.
Copy !req
1167. Where are you going to sleep?
Copy !req
1168. - The living-room couch.
- Don't you want to sleep with me?
Copy !req
1169. - It's just sex.
- Okay.
Copy !req
1170. If you think it's okay.
Copy !req
1171. - How can you be like that?
- I get undressed every day.
Copy !req
1172. In front of someone is different.
Copy !req
1173. I don't see why.
Copy !req
1174. Maybe because
you have a beautiful body.
Copy !req
1175. - Maybe that makes it easier.
- Yeah, I suppose it might.
Copy !req
1176. Do you want to fuck?
Copy !req
1177. I do. Do you?
Copy !req
1178. - Take your clothes off.
- I'm sorry.
Copy !req
1179. I'm very, very lonely.
Copy !req
1180. I don't...
Copy !req
1181. know what's wrong. I just...
Copy !req
1182. I'm sorry.
Copy !req
1183. Do you understand?
Copy !req
1184. I mean,
can you understand loneliness?
Copy !req
1185. Yeah. I mean...
Copy !req
1186. I don't know, I feel okay, mostly.
Copy !req
1187. Fucking might help.
Copy !req
1188. I'm sorry.
Copy !req
1189. It's okay, I don't mind.
Take your clothes off.
Copy !req
1190. - You're very pretty.
- Thanks.
Copy !req
1191. Sometimes I wish
I could be pretty like that.
Copy !req
1192. What, you wish you were a girl?
Copy !req
1193. Sometimes I think
I might have been better at it.
Copy !req
1194. Interesting.
It's kind of a drag in a lot of ways.
Copy !req
1195. - Do you like guys?
- No. I only love women.
Copy !req
1196. Well, I'm getting cold.
Copy !req
1197. You're pretty, Caden.
Copy !req
1198. Thanks for saying that.
Copy !req
1199. Come to bed, pretty Caden.
Copy !req
1200. I shouldn't have drunk
so much fucking beer last night.
Copy !req
1201. - What are you gonna do about it?
- Get lunch. What are you going to do?
Copy !req
1202. - For chrissake.
- Good, Roland.
Copy !req
1203. Thanks, Caden.
Copy !req
1204. We need to fire him.
Copy !req
1205. We don't need to fire him.
Copy !req
1206. Jeremy's playing to us.
Copy !req
1207. Tell him to talk to Donna
and we'll hear what we hear.
Copy !req
1208. Sammy's explaining too much.
It feels expository.
Copy !req
1209. It needs to be shorthand, like,
"Jeremy, big."
Copy !req
1210. Caden, can we stop a second?
Copy !req
1211. Sure.
Copy !req
1212. If Hazel's in love with Sammy,
and Caden's in love with Hazel...
Copy !req
1213. there would be a big confrontation
where Caden turns to me and says:
Copy !req
1214. "It's obvious he's a substitute
for me."
Copy !req
1215. Then I think Hazel would have
a good moment where she cries...
Copy !req
1216. or gets angry, I'm not sure which yet,
but I think it's dramatically sound...
Copy !req
1217. - That didn't happen.
- I think Hazel would do that.
Copy !req
1218. - But Hazel hasn't done that, Tammy.
- Caden, what do you think?
Copy !req
1219. I feel like we could try it.
Copy !req
1220. - Great.
- Fuck.
Copy !req
1221. Let's try it. Maybe it could happen
at the director's table.
Copy !req
1222. Fuck.
Copy !req
1223. You know, Tammy's right.
Copy !req
1224. I don't understand
why you're with Sammy.
Copy !req
1225. He's nice, he's available,
he fucks me without crying.
Copy !req
1226. Since when are you available?
Copy !req
1227. Derek left because of you.
Copy !req
1228. When?
How come you never told me?
Copy !req
1229. I don't know, Caden.
How come a lot of things, huh?
Copy !req
1230. Fuck. I gotta let go of the actor
who played Derek. What's his name?
Copy !req
1231. What?
That is such a romantic response.
Copy !req
1232. - I am touched.
- It's not my response.
Copy !req
1233. Derek is played by...
Copy !req
1234. We have enormous
budgetary concerns here.
Copy !req
1235. - ... Joe.
- Stop. Okay? No, just stop.
Copy !req
1236. I do not like Tammy,
and she's nothing like me.
Copy !req
1237. - How can you like her, anyway?
- She looks like you.
Copy !req
1238. - Joe Abernathy. No, she does not.
- She offered to have sex with me.
Copy !req
1239. - Abernathy?
- Yeah.
Copy !req
1240. - Was it good?
- It was nice.
Copy !req
1241. I'm just being honest. It was nice.
It wasn't earth-shattering.
Copy !req
1242. - Did you cry?
- No.
Copy !req
1243. You're making progress.
Copy !req
1244. Okay, I cried a little before.
Copy !req
1245. Hazel, you've been a part of me
forever. Don't you know that?
Copy !req
1246. I breathe your name
in every exhalation.
Copy !req
1247. - What are we doing?
- I don't know.
Copy !req
1248. Oh, this is the place
I stayed with Derek and the kids.
Copy !req
1249. - Yeah, we're almost...
- Caden.
Copy !req
1250. Caden.
Copy !req
1251. - Caden. Caden, look at me.
- What are you doing?
Copy !req
1252. Sammy, stay right where you are.
I'm coming up.
Copy !req
1253. There's nothing to talk about, Hazel.
It's not your fault.
Copy !req
1254. - What are you doing?
- I've watched you forever, Caden.
Copy !req
1255. But you've never really looked
at anyone other than yourself.
Copy !req
1256. So watch me.
Copy !req
1257. Watch my heart break.
Watch me jump.
Copy !req
1258. Watch me learn
that after death there's nothing.
Copy !req
1259. No more watching,
no more following, no love.
Copy !req
1260. Say goodbye to Hazel for me.
And say it for yourself too.
Copy !req
1261. - None of us has much time.
- Sammy! Come down!
Copy !req
1262. Hazel, I love you!
Copy !req
1263. Sammy!
Copy !req
1264. I didn't jump, Sammy.
Copy !req
1265. A man stopped me before I jumped.
Get up!
Copy !req
1266. I didn't jump.
Copy !req
1267. I know how to do it now.
Copy !req
1268. There are nearly 13 million people
in the world.
Copy !req
1269. I mean, can you imagine
that many people?
Copy !req
1270. And none of those people
is an extra.
Copy !req
1271. They're all leads in their own stories.
They have to be given their due.
Copy !req
1272. I know how to do it now.
Copy !req
1273. There are 13 million people
in this world.
Copy !req
1274. Can you imagine
how many people that is?
Copy !req
1275. None of those people are an extra.
They're all a lead in their own story.
Copy !req
1276. They have got to be given their due.
Copy !req
1277. Do you see what I'm saying?
Copy !req
1278. Come over tonight.
Copy !req
1279. Please.
Copy !req
1280. You know,
we could get a place together.
Copy !req
1281. - We could get a loft.
- God, Caden, that sounds nice.
Copy !req
1282. I miss my daughter.
Maybe she could come live with us.
Copy !req
1283. I miss Olive.
Copy !req
1284. And the other one.
Copy !req
1285. - I'm a bad person.
- Oh, no, you're not.
Copy !req
1286. I am. I should never have gone out
with Sammy.
Copy !req
1287. I was just trying to get to you.
Copy !req
1288. You can't cause someone
to kill himself.
Copy !req
1289. He was very troubled.
Copy !req
1290. God, Caden.
Copy !req
1291. I wish we had this
when we were young.
Copy !req
1292. And all those years in between.
Copy !req
1293. My heart aches so much for you.
Copy !req
1294. We're here, Caden.
Copy !req
1295. - I'm here.
- I'm aching for it being over.
Copy !req
1296. Yeah. The end is built
into the beginning.
Copy !req
1297. What can you do?
Copy !req
1298. - God, you're just perfect.
- I'm a mess.
Copy !req
1299. - But we fit, don't we?
- Yeah.
Copy !req
1300. It doesn't always happen
for me now...
Copy !req
1301. because of the medication
and everything.
Copy !req
1302. - I take a lot of pills.
- It's okay.
Copy !req
1303. I'm embarrassed. I don't want you
to think it's about you or me.
Copy !req
1304. It's okay.
Copy !req
1305. I have a title.
Copy !req
1306. The Obscure Moon
Lighting an Obscure World.
Copy !req
1307. I think it might be too much.
Copy !req
1308. Yeah, probably.
Copy !req
1309. Sir, could you come up here,
please?
Copy !req
1310. Might be smoke inhalation.
Copy !req
1311. It's Hazel. Leave a message or not.
It's your dime.
Copy !req
1312. I know how to do the play now.
Copy !req
1313. It'll all take place
over the course of one day...
Copy !req
1314. and that day
will be the day before you died.
Copy !req
1315. It was the happiest day of my life.
Copy !req
1316. And I'll be able to relive it forever.
Copy !req
1317. See you soon.
Copy !req
1318. So have you got any thoughts
for today's rehearsal?
Copy !req
1319. I have a new title, maybe.
Copy !req
1320. Infectious Diseases in Cattle.
Copy !req
1321. The title means a lot of things.
You'll see, it means a lot.
Copy !req
1322. I need a Caden for my Hazel.
Copy !req
1323. I'd very much like to play Caden.
Copy !req
1324. I know that...
Copy !req
1325. I know that it would be
nontraditional casting...
Copy !req
1326. but I think I could do it.
I think I understand him.
Copy !req
1327. I don't understand him.
Copy !req
1328. Well, Caden Cotard
is a man already dead.
Copy !req
1329. He lives in a half world
between stasis and antistasis...
Copy !req
1330. and time is concentrated,
chronology confused.
Copy !req
1331. Yet up until recently,
he's strived valiantly...
Copy !req
1332. to make sense of his situation.
Copy !req
1333. But now he's turned to stone.
Copy !req
1334. - Okay. Sounds good.
- Okay.
Copy !req
1335. - Thanks.
- She's right?
Copy !req
1336. I didn't see that at all.
I saw it as much more hopeful.
Copy !req
1337. None of those people is extras.
Copy !req
1338. They're all leads in their own stories.
Copy !req
1339. No, this is tedious. This is nothing.
Copy !req
1340. Hi, your scene's over.
Would you leave the stage?
Copy !req
1341. - What is she doing?
- He's directing.
Copy !req
1342. Can I get you down
at the coffin there?
Copy !req
1343. She not getting the feel of you,
Caden.
Copy !req
1344. You don't move around like that.
You don't talk to people.
Copy !req
1345. Sit on the ground there.
Okay, everybody, let's run it.
Copy !req
1346. Everything is more complicated
than you think.
Copy !req
1347. You only see a tenth of what is true.
Copy !req
1348. There are a million little strings
attached to every choice you make.
Copy !req
1349. You can destroy your life
every time you choose.
Copy !req
1350. But maybe you won't know
for 20 years...
Copy !req
1351. and you may never, ever trace it
to its source.
Copy !req
1352. And you only get one chance
to play it out.
Copy !req
1353. Just try and figure out
your own divorce.
Copy !req
1354. And they say there is no fate,
but there is, it's what you create.
Copy !req
1355. And even though the world goes on
for eons and eons...
Copy !req
1356. you are only here for a fraction
of a fraction of a second.
Copy !req
1357. Most of your time is spent being dead
or not yet born.
Copy !req
1358. But while alive, you wait in vain...
Copy !req
1359. wasting years for a phone call
or a letter or a look...
Copy !req
1360. from someone or something
to make it all right.
Copy !req
1361. And it never comes, or it seems to,
but it doesn't really.
Copy !req
1362. So you spend your time
in vague regret...
Copy !req
1363. or vaguer hope
that something good will come along.
Copy !req
1364. Something
to make you feel connected.
Copy !req
1365. Something
to make you feel whole.
Copy !req
1366. Something
to make you feel loved.
Copy !req
1367. And the truth is...
Copy !req
1368. I feel so angry.
Copy !req
1369. And the truth is...
Copy !req
1370. I feel so fucking sad.
Copy !req
1371. And the truth is, I've felt
so fucking hurt for so fucking long.
Copy !req
1372. And for just as long,
I've been pretending I'm okay...
Copy !req
1373. just to get along, just for...
Copy !req
1374. I don't know why.
Copy !req
1375. Maybe because no one wants to hear
about my misery...
Copy !req
1376. because they have their own.
Copy !req
1377. Well, fuck everybody.
Copy !req
1378. - Amen.
- Amen.
Copy !req
1379. - Delightful.
- Thanks.
Copy !req
1380. I'm out of ideas.
Copy !req
1381. I'm dead.
Copy !req
1382. Well, I could take over as you for a bit
until you feel refreshed.
Copy !req
1383. I think you're tired, Caden.
All these years of creative work.
Copy !req
1384. I think you just need some time
to regroup.
Copy !req
1385. - I need to keep my hand in.
- Well, Ellen needs to be filled.
Copy !req
1386. - What do you mean?
- Her role. Just for a bit.
Copy !req
1387. It's a choice role.
Copy !req
1388. I do like to clean.
Copy !req
1389. Ellen?
Copy !req
1390. - Yes?
- Caden asked me to give you this.
Copy !req
1391. You're to keep it in all the time.
Copy !req
1392. So touched by the sadness
of Adele's neighbor so close to death.
Copy !req
1393. Say, "Thank you,"
to Adele's neighbor.
Copy !req
1394. Thank you.
Copy !req
1395. You're very welcome, young lady.
Copy !req
1396. - Now say, "Have a very good day."
- Have a very good day.
Copy !req
1397. I will indeed.
Copy !req
1398. Reach for the toilet paper.
Copy !req
1399. Wrap some around your hand.
Copy !req
1400. Wipe yourself.
Copy !req
1401. There was supposed to be
something else.
Copy !req
1402. You were supposed
to have something, a calm.
Copy !req
1403. Love.
Copy !req
1404. Children.
Copy !req
1405. A child, at least.
Copy !req
1406. Children.
Copy !req
1407. Meaning.
Copy !req
1408. Everything okay, Eric?
Copy !req
1409. - Everything is everything.
- He hates me.
Copy !req
1410. I disappointed him,
and he hates me.
Copy !req
1411. Everyone is disappointing
when you know someone.
Copy !req
1412. I remember having that picnic
with my mother. Look at me.
Copy !req
1413. Ellen, what is it?
Copy !req
1414. I was so young.
Copy !req
1415. I'm going to remember this moment
for the rest of my life, Mama...
Copy !req
1416. and in exactly 20 years,
come here with my daughter...
Copy !req
1417. and have exactly the same picnic.
Copy !req
1418. There was so much hope.
Copy !req
1419. Baby, that the loveliest thing
I've ever heard.
Copy !req
1420. Oh, God. Sorry, Mommy. I'm sorry.
Copy !req
1421. Where is my little girl?
Copy !req
1422. Where is my little girl?
Where is my little girl?
Copy !req
1423. Look at the night table
for a note from Adele.
Copy !req
1424. Stare out the window.
Copy !req
1425. Remember the time she got you
to pose for one of her paintings?
Copy !req
1426. How she told you
how beautiful you were?
Copy !req
1427. How she made you feel pretty again
for a little while?
Copy !req
1428. Think how you'll miss her.
Copy !req
1429. Stand up.
Copy !req
1430. Now it is waiting, and nobody cares.
Copy !req
1431. And when your wait is over,
this room will still exist...
Copy !req
1432. and it will continue to hold shoes
and dresses and boxes...
Copy !req
1433. and maybe someday
another waiting person.
Copy !req
1434. And maybe not.
Copy !req
1435. The room doesn't care either.
Copy !req
1436. Hello?
Copy !req
1437. There's nobody running the elevator
anymore.
Copy !req
1438. What was once before you,
an exciting and mysterious future...
Copy !req
1439. is now behind you,
lived, understood, disappointing.
Copy !req
1440. You realize you are not special.
Copy !req
1441. You have struggled into existence
and are now slipping silently out of it.
Copy !req
1442. This is everyone's experience.
Every single one.
Copy !req
1443. The specifics hardly matter.
Everyone is everyone.
Copy !req
1444. So you are Adele...
Copy !req
1445. Hazel, Claire, Olive.
Copy !req
1446. You are Ellen.
All her meager sadnesses are yours.
Copy !req
1447. All her loneliness.
The gray, straw-like hair.
Copy !req
1448. Her red, raw hands. It's yours.
Copy !req
1449. It is time for you to understand this.
Copy !req
1450. Walk.
Copy !req
1451. As the people who adore you
stop adoring you...
Copy !req
1452. as they die, as they move on...
Copy !req
1453. as you shed them, as you shed
your beauty, your youth...
Copy !req
1454. as the world forgets you,
as you recognize your transience...
Copy !req
1455. as you begin to lose
your characteristics one by one...
Copy !req
1456. as you learn
there is no one watching you...
Copy !req
1457. and there never was,
you think only about driving.
Copy !req
1458. Not coming from anyplace,
not arriving anyplace...
Copy !req
1459. just driving, counting off time.
Copy !req
1460. Now you are here. It's 7:43.
Copy !req
1461. Now you are here. It's 7:44.
Copy !req
1462. Now you are gone.
Copy !req
1463. Where is everybody?
Copy !req
1464. Mostly dead. Some have left.
Copy !req
1465. Would you sit with me for a moment?
Because I'm very tired and lonely.
Copy !req
1466. I feel like I know you.
Copy !req
1467. Well, I was the mother
in Ellen's dream.
Copy !req
1468. Yes.
Copy !req
1469. You seem a bit older
than I remember.
Copy !req
1470. That dream was quite a while ago.
Copy !req
1471. Apologize.
Copy !req
1472. I didn't mean to say you looked old.
Copy !req
1473. There's everyone's dreams
in all those apartments.
Copy !req
1474. All those thoughts I'll never know.
That's the truth of it.
Copy !req
1475. I wanted to do that picnic
with my daughter.
Copy !req
1476. I feel like
I've disappointed you terribly.
Copy !req
1477. Oh, no. I am so proud of you.
Copy !req
1478. Ask her if you can put your head
on her shoulder.
Copy !req
1479. Can I lay my head
on your shoulder?
Copy !req
1480. Yes.
Copy !req
1481. I love you.
Copy !req
1482. I love you too.
Copy !req
1483. I know how to do this play now.
Copy !req
1484. I have an idea.
Copy !req
1485. I think if everyone...
Copy !req
1486. Die.
Copy !req