1. Hi.Copy !req
2. Oh hey, how are you?Copy !req
3. Good, how are you?Copy !req
4. Good. So, the total is $14.65Copy !req
5. Great. Thank you, so much.Copy !req
6. Heh-hey.Copy !req
7. Hey! There are two pieces
missing from this pizza.Copy !req
8. That is our PAC-MAN deal.Copy !req
9. Where we make a whole pizza,Copy !req
10. we take a couple slices out of itCopy !req
11. and it looks like a PAC-MAN monster.Copy !req
12. No, that's bullshit.Copy !req
13. I can see the food in
your beard from here.Copy !req
14. You're disgusting,
I'm calling your boss.Copy !req
15. No no no.Copy !req
16. Don't do that, don't do that.Copy !req
17. I'll give you a discount
on the pizza, $15.Copy !req
18. That's what it costs originally.Copy !req
19. No, this is the discount.Copy !req
20. $10 for the pizza, $5 for the tip.Copy !req
21. Hey Clark, are you home early?Copy !req
22. Yeah, I got fired.Copy !req
23. Oh no, what happened?Copy !req
24. Well, I got a little
hungry after workingCopy !req
25. for three hours straight.Copy !req
26. And ate a couple slices of pizza.Copy !req
27. Everybody got mad and yelled at me.Copy !req
28. I'm so sorry.Copy !req
29. Well, so I'm gonna be a
little bit late with the rent.Copy !req
30. Hey, don't worry about it.Copy !req
31. I know how hard this job market isCopy !req
32. and I'll cover this month
and we'll put it on your tab.Copy !req
33. I have some money saved
up and once you get backCopy !req
34. on your feet you can pay me back.Copy !req
35. Sound like a deal?Copy !req
36. Yeah, I guess that sounds fair.Copy !req
37. But I don't want you jumping in thereCopy !req
38. as soon as I get a job and
asking for all your money back.Copy !req
39. Give me some time to build up a savings.Copy !req
40. I don't know, pay some bills.Copy !req
41. Get some walking around money.Copy !req
42. Et cetera.Copy !req
43. Yeah, I know I know.Copy !req
44. Just don't ride my ass
when I get that job.Copy !req
45. I know, I know.Copy !req
46. I need some cushion time.Copy !req
47. Three, six, nine months even.Copy !req
48. Yeah, yeah, yeah.Copy !req
49. Completely get it.Copy !req
50. Oh, hey hey!Copy !req
51. This is my work.Copy !req
52. Then leave it at work.Copy !req
53. I can't.Copy !req
54. I gotta get the paperwork
done for these cases.Copy !req
55. Gah, you are the most
boring police officerCopy !req
56. I have ever met in my entire life.Copy !req
57. This is just temporary.Copy !req
58. Once I've passed the academy
I'm going toCopy !req
59. be out on the street.Copy !req
60. Isn't that what you said last year?Copy !req
61. Sorry, I'm being a dick.Copy !req
62. Come on, let's get going.Copy !req
63. Let's get you applying
for some jobs online.Copy !req
64. We're gonna get you a job.Copy !req
65. No thanks.Copy !req
66. I think I'm just gonna
drink until I pass out.Copy !req
67. Why don't you come see
me for lunch tomorrow?Copy !req
68. No.Copy !req
69. My treat?Copy !req
70. Okay.Copy !req
71. Have you looked for any jobs today?Copy !req
72. No.Copy !req
73. Listen, Clark.Copy !req
74. I'm here to support you.Copy !req
75. And I wanna help you out, buddy.Copy !req
76. But, you gotta try.Copy !req
77. I am trying.Copy !req
78. No, you're not really.Copy !req
79. You haven't even looked
for any jobs today.Copy !req
80. Yeah, but I woke up.Copy !req
81. And that's a pretty good start.Copy !req
82. I have a friend and she
manages a call-center.Copy !req
83. If I set up an interview, would you go?Copy !req
84. I guess.Copy !req
85. What are you doing?Copy !req
86. Getting ahold of her.Copy !req
87. No no, you can't do that now.Copy !req
88. You gotta prepare for something
like this.Copy !req
89. You know I've got a lot
of sleeping to catch up onCopy !req
90. and stuff like that.Copy !req
91. Oh! They let you out of
the office during the day?Copy !req
92. Yeah, what moron's
stuffing paper into envelopesCopy !req
93. with you gone?Copy !req
94. Ha ha ha ha!Copy !req
95. That's so great guys.Copy !req
96. Like, I'm like a, like I'm
gonna go out, sniff the air.Copy !req
97. And I'm gonna go to
the bathroom and stuff.Copy !req
98. You know like...Copy !req
99. You shit outside?Copy !req
100. No, like I'm an Aleutian
working dog, you know?Copy !req
101. Yeah, dog's shit outside.Copy !req
102. Look, my partner here
doesn't understand metaphors.Copy !req
103. Nuh-ah.Copy !req
104. In his defense, your face does lookCopy !req
105. like somebody that'd love
to poop outside.Copy !req
106. What the hell is going on here?Copy !req
107. Whoa! Whoa!Copy !req
108. Pipe down.Copy !req
109. Clark, this is Garibaldi and Betts.Copy !req
110. We were in the academy
together like three years ago.Copy !req
111. Remind me, was that the
first time or second timeCopy !req
112. that you failed?Copy !req
113. Second time.Copy !req
114. What's this?Copy !req
115. Oh, no no.Copy !req
116. That's not...Copy !req
117. You don't need to..Copy !req
118. Ah, comic books?Copy !req
119. What, uh, two year-old
did you jack those from?Copy !req
120. Two year-olds can't read.Copy !req
121. Yeah, some can.Copy !req
122. No, none can.Copy !req
123. Super smart ones can.Copy !req
124. Yeah dude.Copy !req
125. Yeah, super smart ones can.Copy !req
126. We gotta go.Copy !req
127. Cop shit.Copy !req
128. Goodbye guys.Copy !req
129. Get a razor.Copy !req
130. Shut up.Copy !req
131. They're so cool.Copy !req
132. The hell was that?Copy !req
133. What, those guys are cool.Copy !req
134. Cool?Copy !req
135. Those guys were dicks.Copy !req
136. No, we're just always
razzing each other.Copy !req
137. You know, poking fun.Copy !req
138. That's how cops are.Copy !req
139. That conversation consisted
of them giving you shit.Copy !req
140. You making some weird terrible jokeCopy !req
141. about being a dog or something?Copy !req
142. A God-awful joke if it was one at all.Copy !req
143. I mean, you just embarrassed
yourself out there.Copy !req
144. You just said you pooped
outside in the yard.Copy !req
145. Comics?Copy !req
146. At work?Copy !req
147. Come on, dude.Copy !req
148. Ah no, I go and read them
in the bathroom, you know?Copy !req
149. It's like a really cool storyCopy !req
150. and it's like a break
from all the paperwork.Copy !req
151. They make me happy.Copy !req
152. Oh, you have an interview.Copy !req
153. When?Copy !req
154. Your resume is, uh, something.Copy !req
155. You've had a lot of jobs.Copy !req
156. Yeah, I've been out there experimenting.Copy !req
157. Mm-hmm.Copy !req
158. Oh and, you don't have any references?Copy !req
159. No, I don't have any.Copy !req
160. Oh, actually, yeah I do.Copy !req
161. Here.Copy !req
162. Oh you have a refer...Copy !req
163. Okay.Copy !req
164. There we go.Copy !req
165. I guess that's Dale?Copy !req
166. Yeah.Copy !req
167. Presto, there's Dale.Copy !req
168. Uhm, so, as you know we
always need new employees hereCopy !req
169. at Stanton Family Electronics.Copy !req
170. And, uhm, there is a
relatively high turnover rate.Copy !req
171. Like the pastry.Copy !req
172. I'm sorry? No.Copy !req
173. Turnover.Copy !req
174. No, I don't mean that.Copy !req
175. I mean like, uhm, there's
a lot of people thatCopy !req
176. we hire and they have to
quickly move on to other things.Copy !req
177. Right.Copy !req
178. Who's going to be upset
about a surplus of pastries.Copy !req
179. No, I'm not talking about pastries.Copy !req
180. Yeah, I know.Copy !req
181. Okay, can we just move on.Copy !req
182. So, if you know how to answer a phone,Copy !req
183. follow a basic script,Copy !req
184. you can pretty much work here.Copy !req
185. Oh, I can do that.Copy !req
186. Great!Copy !req
187. When do I start?Copy !req
188. Oh, you can go ahead and sit down.Copy !req
189. Why don't we do a little
role-playing, first.Copy !req
190. See how you handle some of the thingsCopy !req
191. that might come up on a phone
call with a customer, okay?Copy !req
192. Let's give it a shot.Copy !req
193. Come on, I'm excited.Copy !req
194. So, here's my phone.Copy !req
195. Hello, my DVD player is not working.Copy !req
196. I wondered if you can help me.Copy !req
197. Ah, yes.Copy !req
198. Have you tried unplugging
it and plugging it back it?Copy !req
199. I already tried that.Copy !req
200. Oh, maybe you can go grab a hammerCopy !req
201. and start hitting it.Copy !req
202. Nope. Nope.Copy !req
203. We would never recommend that.Copy !req
204. No, I fix a lot of things
by hitting them with hammers.Copy !req
205. Do you really do that?Copy !req
206. How much is broken at your home?Copy !req
207. You know what, lets...Copy !req
208. - Let's try something else.
- Start over.Copy !req
209. Okay.Copy !req
210. Uhm, hello, I have a remote controlCopy !req
211. that has a couple buttons
that are not working anymore.Copy !req
212. Do you have any advice?Copy !req
213. Take the batteries out,
and put 'em right back in.Copy !req
214. Great, one second.Copy !req
215. Take out the battery.Copy !req
216. Great, that's also not working.Copy !req
217. Well, I wouldn't suggest hitting itCopy !req
218. because we don't recommend
things like that.Copy !req
219. But if you could take it,
and then smack it againstCopy !req
220. the coffee table or the couch leg...Copy !req
221. This is the same thing.Copy !req
222. That's still hitting it.Copy !req
223. Yeah, you don't...Copy !req
224. You hit the electronic
against something else.Copy !req
225. It's the way to fix things.Copy !req
226. It's an impact of some...Copy !req
227. It's a way to fix things.Copy !req
228. It's not the only way, of course.Copy !req
229. It's just a different
way of damaging them.Copy !req
230. I don't know what to do here.Copy !req
231. Uhm, well.Copy !req
232. Thank you so much for coming in.Copy !req
233. It was great to meet you.Copy !req
234. Tha... thank you.Copy !req
235. Clark, we'll uhm...Copy !req
236. I will do something with this.Copy !req
237. Oh hey, there you are.Copy !req
238. Hey.Copy !req
239. Where you been, buddy?Copy !req
240. Ah, sleeping.Copy !req
241. For four days?Copy !req
242. Four days?Copy !req
243. I guess you didn't have any timeCopy !req
244. to check in or say hi or anything.Copy !req
245. But you had plenty of
time to make spaghetti.Copy !req
246. What spaghetti?Copy !req
247. You know, that enormous
bowl of spaghettiCopy !req
248. that's been there on the counter
all week.Copy !req
249. I assumed you were just making
them and then eating themCopy !req
250. and then immediately making another one.Copy !req
251. They've been steaming.Copy !req
252. Is it painful?Copy !req
253. Because I can prescribe
you something for pain.Copy !req
254. No, no it's not painful.Copy !req
255. Should it be?Copy !req
256. Well, is it one noodle?Copy !req
257. At a time?Copy !req
258. Like one long noodle?Copy !req
259. 'Cause if it's one long noodle,
you know,Copy !req
260. that seems like it might not hurt.Copy !req
261. The size of your urethra
being comparableCopy !req
262. to the size of a spaghetti noodle.Copy !req
263. But is it possible that you insertedCopy !req
264. the spaghetti into your penis first?Copy !req
265. No.Copy !req
266. If it's a dry noodle,
a dry noodle can go in.Copy !req
267. I've put needles inside of urethras.Copy !req
268. Why?Copy !req
269. Science.Copy !req
270. To see if I could.Copy !req
271. Why do you go to the Moon?Copy !req
272. Did you just fall
asleep at a college party?Copy !req
273. Be honest.Copy !req
274. Did you buy a bunch of teenagers beerCopy !req
275. for a college party and then
fall asleep.Copy !req
276. And then you wiped off all the dicksCopy !req
277. they drew on your face
and then you showed upCopy !req
278. here at my office.Copy !req
279. And they put spaghetti
in your penis somehow.Copy !req
280. Do I like like a guy who...Copy !req
281. You do.Copy !req
282. It's not any of those things.Copy !req
283. It's just a, I'm just...Copy !req
284. Freaking out.Copy !req
285. Very well.Copy !req
286. Is it making you anxious?Copy !req
287. Yes.Copy !req
288. Okay!Copy !req
289. I will write you a prescription.Copy !req
290. There you are, sir.Copy !req
291. Weed.Copy !req
292. Really good weed.Copy !req
293. I don't need a weed.Copy !req
294. I need a fix.Copy !req
295. Did you not see my diploma?Copy !req
296. Oh.Copy !req
297. And there's myriad
ways in which marijuanaCopy !req
298. might help your issue.Copy !req
299. Name one thing.Copy !req
300. Well, it might make you hungry.Copy !req
301. And then if you eat the spaghetti maybeCopy !req
302. it'll break a curse, I don't know.Copy !req
303. You would drink a spaghetti pee?Copy !req
304. No.Copy !req
305. But, I don't like spaghetti.Copy !req
306. Oh.Copy !req
307. Drink that spaghetti pee.Copy !req
308. Sorry, I'm getting a little anxious.Copy !req
309. This isn't happening.Copy !req
310. This isn't happening.Copy !req
311. This isn't happening.Copy !req
312. This isn't...Copy !req
313. Come on, that's my bag, please.Copy !req
314. Give me your bag.Copy !req
315. Give me your...Copy !req
316. Please, help my bag!Copy !req
317. What the hell?Copy !req
318. What the hell?Copy !req
319. What the hell?Copy !req
320. No no, don't do that.Copy !req
321. No, I'm sorry.Copy !req
322. I'm sorry, sorry.Copy !req
323. Freeze.Copy !req
324. Get off my plane.Copy !req
325. I ain't heard no fat lady.Copy !req
326. What the hell?Copy !req
327. Oh my God, I'm sorry.Copy !req
328. Is that spaghetti?Copy !req
329. What's going on, Clark?Copy !req
330. Look, okay.Copy !req
331. This is going to seem weird.Copy !req
332. I can sling spaghetti from my hands.Copy !req
333. Yeah, okay.Copy !req
334. Look at the couch.Copy !req
335. You mean this?Copy !req
336. This pile of spaghetti
you had in your handCopy !req
337. and then threw at me?Copy !req
338. That came from inside of me.Copy !req
339. This is, by far, your lamest prank ever.Copy !req
340. We gotta take you to a
doctor or an ER or something.Copy !req
341. Yeah?Copy !req
342. And tell 'em what, exactly?Copy !req
343. I don't know, but...Copy !req
344. Yeah, assuming that
they don't lock me upCopy !req
345. and throw me in a straight jacket,Copy !req
346. what do you thinks gonna
happen when they find outCopy !req
347. I can shoot spaghetti out of my hands.Copy !req
348. Being a real life mutant's
not gonna work outCopy !req
349. for me as well as you'd think.Copy !req
350. Yeah, you're right.Copy !req
351. I mean, look how it went for the X-Men.Copy !req
352. But this is weird man,
we've gotta do something.Copy !req
353. Yeah, no shit it's weird.Copy !req
354. Does it hurt?Copy !req
355. No.Copy !req
356. Do you feel different?Copy !req
357. No.Copy !req
358. What if you, like, told
a scientist or something?Copy !req
359. What'd I just say, Dale?Copy !req
360. I don't wanna tell anybody about this.Copy !req
361. This could be used for good, maybe.Copy !req
362. Like it could be a gift.Copy !req
363. You know, now I regret
saying anything to you.Copy !req
364. No no no.Copy !req
365. No, I'm sorry.Copy !req
366. Give us your money, asshole.Copy !req
367. Give me your wallet.Copy !req
368. I don't... please, stop it.Copy !req
369. Okay, Clark.Copy !req
370. Do not engage criminals.Copy !req
371. You're gonna stand up.Copy !req
372. And you're gonna run out of here.Copy !req
373. And you're gonna go home.Copy !req
374. Okay, and stand up...Copy !req
375. Listen, assholes.Copy !req
376. You leave that guy alone.Copy !req
377. Who the hell are you?Copy !req
378. I'm. I'm uh...Copy !req
379. Just walk away now, or else.Copy !req
380. Or else what?Copy !req
381. You know what?Copy !req
382. This isn't really working outCopy !req
383. the way I thought it was going to.Copy !req
384. I'm just gonna, I'm just gonna go.Copy !req
385. Yeah, walk away, bitch.Copy !req
386. Bitch.Copy !req
387. Ah. Ow.Copy !req
388. Ahhhhh!Copy !req
389. Who are you?Copy !req
390. I'm the Spaghettiman.Copy !req
391. Oww. That was bad ass.Copy !req
392. Thank you, thank you so much.Copy !req
393. Did you see all that
cool stuff I just did?Copy !req
394. I thought they were going to kill me.Copy !req
395. This isn't about you.Copy !req
396. This about the punching, the
headbutting, the kyah, kyah.Copy !req
397. I wish I could, I
wish I could repay you.Copy !req
398. You can.Copy !req
399. What?Copy !req
400. What's in your wallet?Copy !req
401. Wait, uhm, seriously?Copy !req
402. Yeah, I mean, you said you wantedCopy !req
403. to repay me, right?Copy !req
404. Oh, uhm.Copy !req
405. Uhm, uh, a couple 20s and...Copy !req
406. Thank you.Copy !req
407. Pleasure doing business with you.Copy !req
408. Thank you for saving my life.Copy !req
409. Dick.Copy !req
410. Dick with 42 dollars.Copy !req
411. Betts likes beets...Copy !req
412. Betts doesn't like beets.Copy !req
413. Mmkay, mmkay.Copy !req
414. What are you doing?Copy !req
415. What, what's that on your head?Copy !req
416. And why are you dancing?Copy !req
417. Because I just made $40.Copy !req
418. Kicking some ass.Copy !req
419. What?Copy !req
420. Yeah, dude.Copy !req
421. It was crazy.Copy !req
422. Alright, I was walking
down the street, right?Copy !req
423. And I hear this dude just gettingCopy !req
424. the living daylights kicked out of him.Copy !req
425. So I'm all like, I think
this guy needs to be saved.Copy !req
426. Look, very bravely,
and without hesitation.Copy !req
427. I just wanna emphasize,
not a moment went byCopy !req
428. until I decided, this
guy needs to be saved.Copy !req
429. By me.Copy !req
430. So I look around, grab
this paper sack, right?Copy !req
431. Put it over my head, so of course,Copy !req
432. nobody can see my face.Copy !req
433. And then I just leapt into action.Copy !req
434. I just let 'em have it.Copy !req
435. Bam. Boom. Kick. Slice.Copy !req
436. Took 'em all out.Copy !req
437. Then, the dude paid me.Copy !req
438. So you saved him?Copy !req
439. Pssh, yeah. Yeah.Copy !req
440. And I got paid.Copy !req
441. What if...Copy !req
442. What if you use the
spaghetti thing for good?Copy !req
443. Uhh, I did.Copy !req
444. I got paid 40 dollars.Copy !req
445. That's pretty good.Copy !req
446. But that's not what a superhero does.Copy !req
447. A superhero does things because
it's the right thing to do.Copy !req
448. And because he's a nice guy.Copy !req
449. Whoa, whoa.Copy !req
450. Slow down.Copy !req
451. Who said anything
about being a superhero.Copy !req
452. Think about it!Copy !req
453. You could clean up the
streets and beat up bad guysCopy !req
454. and be a role-model.Copy !req
455. Yeah, yeah. Or, or...Copy !req
456. I can get paid to punch people.Copy !req
457. I think you're missing the point.Copy !req
458. No.Copy !req
459. Look, I hear what you're saying, Dale.Copy !req
460. And, I totally get it.Copy !req
461. But, I also don't give a shit.Copy !req
462. I'm gonna do me, right?Copy !req
463. I'ma get paid.Copy !req
464. Get my money.Copy !req
465. And pay that rent.Copy !req
466. Pay you back.Copy !req
467. Boom, everything's great, baby.Copy !req
468. Get on up!Copy !req
469. 'Scuse me.Copy !req
470. Did you lock your keys in the car?Copy !req
471. Stop right there.Copy !req
472. Hey, hey, I bet this incline isCopy !req
473. pretty tough on the 'ol arms, huh?Copy !req
474. I'm sorry, what?Copy !req
475. Yeah, let me help you out.Copy !req
476. Whoa whoa, no no no, I'm doing...Copy !req
477. Whoa, where are you taking me?Copy !req
478. - Hey, hey.
- To a shortcut.Copy !req
479. Nn-nn-nn-no, what?Copy !req
480. It's okay, I'm taking you to a shortcut.Copy !req
481. Nn-no, I can't do stairs, man.Copy !req
482. Not with that attitude you can't.Copy !req
483. What's going on?Copy !req
484. Oh, hello, sir.Copy !req
485. This young lady tried
to break into your car.Copy !req
486. I stopped her.Copy !req
487. And then tied up her
hands with this spaghetti.Copy !req
488. Uh. Okay.Copy !req
489. Do not drop me.Copy !req
490. I just want you to sit back, relax,Copy !req
491. keep your hands inside
the chair at all times,Copy !req
492. and we'll get you up there.Copy !req
493. Stairs aren't for
people in wheelchairs man.Copy !req
494. Sounds like an excuse
for segregation to me.Copy !req
495. No no, don't use that word.Copy !req
496. Who the hell are you?Copy !req
497. The question is,Copy !req
498. how much is this woman
willing to cough upCopy !req
499. in order to not get kidnapped.Copy !req
500. What?Copy !req
501. What?Copy !req
502. Yeah, I can let this
whole thing just continue.Copy !req
503. Or, you can pay me, mmm,
a hundred bucks.Copy !req
504. I...Copy !req
505. Have sixty?Copy !req
506. That'll do.Copy !req
507. You're gonna tell all
your friends about this.Copy !req
508. No, I'm going to tell
all my friends aboutCopy !req
509. how I met a lunatic.Copy !req
510. No, you're gonna
tell them how you met a hero!Copy !req
511. A hero?Copy !req
512. You're not a hero.Copy !req
513. Soldiers are heroes.Copy !req
514. Superman is a hero.Copy !req
515. You're an asshole.Copy !req
516. I'm all of those things.Copy !req
517. I can let her go right now.Copy !req
518. Yes.Copy !req
519. And then she'll probably go backCopy !req
520. to breaking into your car,
stealing it, driving it away.Copy !req
521. Or...Copy !req
522. Uh, I have...Copy !req
523. Seventeen bucks?Copy !req
524. That'll do, thank you.Copy !req
525. Oh, great, you're alive.Copy !req
526. How long was I out?Copy !req
527. Not long, 37 minutes or so.Copy !req
528. But, hey, don't worry.Copy !req
529. I very heroically watched over you,Copy !req
530. and not just because of
the money you owe me.Copy !req
531. But because it's the right thing to do.Copy !req
532. But...Copy !req
533. You can, uh, give me that $60,
so I can...Copy !req
534. I respect that.Copy !req
535. Okay, great.
Thank you so much.Copy !req
536. No problem.Copy !req
537. Thank you so much.Copy !req
538. I admit...Copy !req
539. No, don't.Copy !req
540. I admit, that took me a little bitCopy !req
541. longer than thought.Copy !req
542. It took a little bit
longer than you thought?Copy !req
543. You planned this?Copy !req
544. So I'm gonna cut you a deal.Copy !req
545. Half off what you were
originally gonna pay.Copy !req
546. What?Copy !req
547. I am not paying you shit.Copy !req
548. That's the deal!Copy !req
549. There's no deal.Copy !req
550. A deal has to exist if
someone wants something.Copy !req
551. I didn't want any of this.Copy !req
552. Okay.Copy !req
553. You ruined my day.Copy !req
554. Okay.Copy !req
555. You ruined my day.Copy !req
556. Okay.Copy !req
557. Bite me.Copy !req
558. Hah. How 'bout this.Copy !req
559. Dinner.Copy !req
560. I'll have an Eggs Benedict bar.Copy !req
561. That'll be a great weekend.Copy !req
562. Garibaldi's gonna love it.Copy !req
563. Oh, oh, hey Dale.Copy !req
564. I know you were Betts best man,Copy !req
565. but I was wondering if you
could also be my best man,Copy !req
566. 'cause I like you
more than I like Betts.Copy !req
567. I like you more than I like
almost anyone.Copy !req
568. Oh boy oh boy oh boy.Copy !req
569. What a day.Copy !req
570. Good day.Copy !req
571. You should take your mask
off before you come home.Copy !req
572. Why?Copy !req
573. So villains don't know where you live?Copy !req
574. Villains?Copy !req
575. Supervillains?Copy !req
576. Hey, Batman had the Bat-cave.Copy !req
577. And Superman had
the Fortress of Solitude.Copy !req
578. Even Spider-man had a
backpack that he at leastCopy !req
579. he put his costume into.Copy !req
580. Okay, okay.Copy !req
581. I'll start taking the
mask off three blocksCopy !req
582. down the street so that the villainsCopy !req
583. don't follow me back to the Bat-cave.Copy !req
584. There's gotta be a better way
to do this.Copy !req
585. Walking around, looking for crimes.Copy !req
586. Trying to solve 'em.Copy !req
587. What's your problem?Copy !req
588. You know, I would love to
be out there helping people.Copy !req
589. But I can't.Copy !req
590. I'm stuck in a office.Copy !req
591. All day.Copy !req
592. I'm sorry, I'm not mad at you.Copy !req
593. I'm just...Copy !req
594. It was May of 1992 when the
cancer first struck my dad.Copy !req
595. Holy crap.Copy !req
596. Yeah, I know.Copy !req
597. I'm on TV.Copy !req
598. In a NewsChannel 4 exclusive,Copy !req
599. we finally have footage
of the masked vigilanteCopy !req
600. that's been running around town,Copy !req
601. allegedly wearing a brown-paper bag.Copy !req
602. One of our viewers sent in this footageCopy !req
603. recorded from her mid-town apartment.Copy !req
604. She attempted to follow, but
lost him around the corner.Copy !req
605. Police recommend, do
not engage the subjectCopy !req
606. and to call the crime-stoppers hotlineCopy !req
607. below with any information.Copy !req
608. This is awesome.Copy !req
609. Maybe I'll be able to
drum up more business.Copy !req
610. People will be able to
get in contact with me.Copy !req
611. Don't give anyone your
address, or your name,Copy !req
612. or your phone number.Copy !req
613. You don't want that Clark.Copy !req
614. Please, if you listen
to one thing I say,Copy !req
615. listen to that.Copy !req
616. Uhhh, I'm not an idiot, Dale.Copy !req
617. I'm not gonna lead supervillains backCopy !req
618. to our Fortress of Solitude
where they can come get me.Copy !req
619. Good.Copy !req
620. Stupid.Copy !req
621. But a craigslist ad is anonymous.Copy !req
622. Dammit.Copy !req
623. Dammit.Copy !req
624. Dammit.Copy !req
625. Hey, whoa, this ad is killing it.Copy !req
626. Yeah?Copy !req
627. Yeah man, I got tons of messages.Copy !req
628. Here, help me figure out
what I should do.Copy !req
629. Wait, you didn't use your
own cell phone number in that,Copy !req
630. did you?Copy !req
631. No, Dale.Copy !req
632. I didn't.Copy !req
633. I'm not an idiot, okay?Copy !req
634. I watched The Wire.Copy !req
635. We use burners for things like this.Copy !req
636. "Dear Spaghettiman..."Copy !req
637. That's your official name?Copy !req
638. Yeah, pretty awesome, huh?Copy !req
639. Okay, "Dear Spaghettiman, me,Copy !req
640. some douchebag stole my television."Copy !req
641. "I know who it is, and
can get you his address."Copy !req
642. "I'll pay you $50."Copy !req
643. It sounds like someone's
just gonna pay your $50Copy !req
644. to steal someone else's television.Copy !req
645. Mm, don't care.Copy !req
646. Not enough money.Copy !req
647. Pass.Copy !req
648. Next email.Copy !req
649. "Dear Spaghettiman,Copy !req
650. My ex-wife won't give me my dog back."Copy !req
651. "It's very dear to me and I would
give you $100 to get it back."Copy !req
652. Yeah, that seems like
a tricky situation.Copy !req
653. 'Cause even if you get the dog back,
she might sue you.Copy !req
654. And if you don't, he
might sue you for harm...Copy !req
655. Don't care, it's like 20
miles outside of town anyway.Copy !req
656. I'm not doing it.Copy !req
657. There's a lot of just,
small, weird ones in here.Copy !req
658. No one wants to pay any good money.Copy !req
659. Listen, I'm gonna go to work.Copy !req
660. To do police work.Copy !req
661. And do some real good in the city.Copy !req
662. Not because I'm paid to.Copy !req
663. But because I want to.Copy !req
664. And also because I'm paid to.Copy !req
665. Pass.Copy !req
666. Pass.Copy !req
667. Pass.Copy !req
668. Pass.Copy !req
669. Pa... wait a second.Copy !req
670. Please, uh, come in.Copy !req
671. Can I get you anything?Copy !req
672. Some soda, water...Copy !req
673. Coffee?Copy !req
674. Do you have any soup?Copy !req
675. Soup?Copy !req
676. Yeah, I'd like a soup.Copy !req
677. Alright, feed me some intel.Copy !req
678. Tell me about this guy.Copy !req
679. Uhm, his name is Gary.Copy !req
680. And, uhm, he's been
involved with these guysCopy !req
681. for a few months now.Copy !req
682. We were having some issues
in our relationship,Copy !req
683. and I guess...Copy !req
684. the drugs just made him feel better.Copy !req
685. Yeah, drugs are cool like that.Copy !req
686. So then he started to use harder stuff.Copy !req
687. And he couldn't pay for it.Copy !req
688. And now they're just keeping him there.Copy !req
689. Mm-hmm, mm-hmm, mm-hmm.Copy !req
690. Yeah, he's a sex-slave now.Copy !req
691. No!Copy !req
692. No, they...Copy !req
693. They're just asking for
ransom and I can't pay for it.Copy !req
694. Oh, uhm...Copy !req
695. That makes sense.Copy !req
696. Yeah.Copy !req
697. I got this.Copy !req
698. Are you sure?Copy !req
699. There's gonna be like a...Copy !req
700. like a bunch of guys there.Copy !req
701. Pfft, please.Copy !req
702. Stephanie, I am a superhero.Copy !req
703. Now, can I get this to go.Copy !req
704. Hey Terry, get the door.Copy !req
705. Criminals listen up.Copy !req
706. I'm here for Gary and I want...Copy !req
707. One, two, three, four, five, ssss...Copy !req
708. Okay, I messed up here.Copy !req
709. Okay, who the hell are you?Copy !req
710. I, uh, I'm the Spaghettiman?Copy !req
711. Oooh, cool.Copy !req
712. What?Copy !req
713. 'Kay, I'm here for Gary and if...Copy !req
714. Hey guys, I'm Gary.Copy !req
715. Gary. Get back in there!Copy !req
716. If you guys know what's good for you.Copy !req
717. You'll cooperate.Copy !req
718. Now listen, do you got $1,500?Copy !req
719. No. I do not.Copy !req
720. Then you're not taking shit.Copy !req
721. Sir, you are mistaken.Copy !req
722. I came here for Gary and
I'm gonna take him back.Copy !req
723. Oh, well but, I'm afraid
you're mistaken, asshole.Copy !req
724. Oh my God, oh my God, oh my... what the?Copy !req
725. Ha ha ha. Blocked it, idiot.Copy !req
726. Hey?Copy !req
727. Hey, you okay?Copy !req
728. Hey, hey man?Copy !req
729. Hey dude?Copy !req
730. Hey?Copy !req
731. Oh my God, this guy's actually dead.Copy !req
732. Hey hey hey.Copy !req
733. Take another step and he gets it.Copy !req
734. Alright, I got it.Copy !req
735. I got it.Copy !req
736. Listen, I don't know
what the shit you are.Copy !req
737. But I swear to God, if you touch me,Copy !req
738. I'm gonna paint the wall
with his brains.Copy !req
739. Okay, you got it?Copy !req
740. I got it, I got it.Copy !req
741. Okay. Now get the hell out of my house.Copy !req
742. Unless you're gonna come back
with some money and shit.Copy !req
743. Or, you can shut your ugly mouth.Copy !req
744. And eat a bowl of justice.Copy !req
745. What?Copy !req
746. Look, alright, no no no.Copy !req
747. You know what?Copy !req
748. Forget about it.Copy !req
749. Forget I even said it.Copy !req
750. I was coming up with a
catch-phrase on the fly and I...Copy !req
751. I messed it up.Copy !req
752. I didn't say it.Copy !req
753. Go back to one.Copy !req
754. Well get the hell out of my place then.Copy !req
755. You piece of shit.Copy !req
756. Hey, buddy, is that a leak in your roof?Copy !req
757. Daaamn.Copy !req
758. Hey, that wasn't bad, right?Copy !req
759. I mean I was looking
for a line and I just,Copy !req
760. came up off the top of my head.Copy !req
761. Oh, I'm sorry, Gary.Copy !req
762. Sorry my catch-phrase wasn't
good enough for you, Gary.Copy !req
763. I was here saving your life.Copy !req
764. Oh my God.Copy !req
765. Oh!Copy !req
766. Okay lovebirds, break it up.Copy !req
767. I hate to be that guy.Copy !req
768. But no more hugging until I get paid.Copy !req
769. Yeah, okay.Copy !req
770. You know, it was quite a bit harderCopy !req
771. than I thought it would be.Copy !req
772. I cannot thank you enough.Copy !req
773. Sure, you could
thank me a little more though.Copy !req
774. We had a deal.Copy !req
775. Fine, take your druggie boyfriend.Copy !req
776. Whoa, hey guy.Copy !req
777. You look a little young to beCopy !req
778. sleeping out here on the streets.Copy !req
779. I'm running away from home.Copy !req
780. Why would you do that?Copy !req
781. Because.Copy !req
782. Life's over.Copy !req
783. Oh, no.Copy !req
784. You're too young to say that.Copy !req
785. Nope, it's all over for me.Copy !req
786. This is the end.Copy !req
787. I'll probably die soon.Copy !req
788. With that attitude?Copy !req
789. Yeah, you probably will.Copy !req
790. But if you keep a positive
mindset, a hope in your heart,Copy !req
791. you're gonna make it someday.Copy !req
792. Leave me alone.Copy !req
793. You know what you need?Copy !req
794. A meal.Copy !req
795. A little yum-yum in your tum-tum
will keep your heart full.Copy !req
796. Thank you.Copy !req
797. My rent, sir.Copy !req
798. Did you see this?Copy !req
799. See what?Copy !req
800. Hey, that's me feeding
the homeless dude.Copy !req
801. Ho man, man this is awesome!Copy !req
802. What? Did you charge
him $10 or something?Copy !req
803. No, Dale.Copy !req
804. He was homeless and
doesn't have any money.Copy !req
805. It was charity.Copy !req
806. You know, superheroes are
nice people, you know.Copy !req
807. Yeah, you're something.Copy !req
808. You know, there's a lot of
pictures of youCopy !req
809. doing this stuff out there.Copy !req
810. And you gotta start being careful.Copy !req
811. Well, yeah?Copy !req
812. Careful of what?Copy !req
813. Doing so awesome and making
so much money?Copy !req
814. I don't think so, man.Copy !req
815. Okay, I gotta go.Copy !req
816. Gotta go run the police
obstacle-course today.Copy !req
817. Probably fail again.Copy !req
818. Well, with that attitude you're gonna.Copy !req
819. I just, can't get over that wall.Copy !req
820. Is that a metaphor for something?Copy !req
821. No, it's an actual wall
that you have to get over.Copy !req
822. Hey, you can do it.Copy !req
823. Look at me.Copy !req
824. Unemployed entrepreneur with
tons of potential a week ago.Copy !req
825. Now, up and coming superhero
entrepreneur this week.Copy !req
826. If I can get over that wall,
you can too.Copy !req
827. Thanks.Copy !req
828. You're okay.Copy !req
829. Oh, thank you.Copy !req
830. Thank you so much.Copy !req
831. Wow, thank you.Copy !req
832. Oh my God, you found her.Copy !req
833. Yeah, I found her, I'm a superhero.Copy !req
834. Yeah, here you go.Copy !req
835. We're at 10th and grandCopy !req
836. waiting for a...Copy !req
837. One-one-forty, copy, twenty minutes.Copy !req
838. Alright, copy that.Copy !req
839. Unit seven-six has now reported a...Copy !req
840. '78 Subaru wagon was the car?Copy !req
841. That's correct.Copy !req
842. Four-one-five
in progress near Echo Park.Copy !req
843. I've official on a suspect dressed
in a red-hooded sweatshirtCopy !req
844. and a paper bag near
the south end of the lake.Copy !req
845. All available units approach
the scene with caution.Copy !req
846. That'll teach you to stick your noseCopy !req
847. up in other people's shit.Copy !req
848. Now you, Dad Pants.Copy !req
849. You're gonna give me
that wallet and phone.Copy !req
850. Or I'm gonna break you
down like a cardboard box.Copy !req
851. Oh, man...Copy !req
852. Hey, are you okay?Copy !req
853. You got any money?Copy !req
854. You don't have any money?Copy !req
855. Okay.Copy !req
856. How about check, do you have any checks?Copy !req
857. Hey, you, jackass.Copy !req
858. Get back here.Copy !req
859. You owe me money!Copy !req
860. You ha...Copy !req
861. You...Copy !req
862. Dammit.Copy !req
863. Who are you?Copy !req
864. I'm...Copy !req
865. Answer me!Copy !req
866. I'm...Copy !req
867. Tell me your name!Copy !req
868. I'm tryi...Copy !req
869. Excuses!Copy !req
870. Can I speak, please?Copy !req
871. Sorry.Copy !req
872. I'm Anthony Banner, I'm a journalist.Copy !req
873. Anthony Banner...Copy !req
874. Why do I know that name?Copy !req
875. Maybe you've seen it on the news?Copy !req
876. My name's all over your footage.Copy !req
877. Yeah.Copy !req
878. Yeah, that's where.Copy !req
879. Are you following me?Copy !req
880. You're a hot commodity.Copy !req
881. People'll pay a pretty
penny for footage of you.Copy !req
882. You make money off of me?Copy !req
883. Yeah, sort of.Copy !req
884. You son of a...Copy !req
885. No no no, please don't hurt me.Copy !req
886. Please, I'm just doing my job.Copy !req
887. I have a pregnant wife, okay?Copy !req
888. Just don't hurt me.Copy !req
889. You cost me money.Copy !req
890. Would, would coffee or
dinner make up for it?Copy !req
891. Wha, what's the matter, Dale?Copy !req
892. Ah, I just got this rejection letter.Copy !req
893. You and Garibaldi can go
ahead and make fun of me.Copy !req
894. Wha, no.Copy !req
895. We just raz you 'cause,Copy !req
896. 'cause you're one of our best buddies.Copy !req
897. I'm not your best buddy.Copy !req
898. I'm a nobody.Copy !req
899. That's not true!Copy !req
900. You don't know, the paperwork
that you do...Copy !req
901. This police station would
be a mess without you.Copy !req
902. You're just saying that.Copy !req
903. No, I'm not.Copy !req
904. No I'm not.Copy !req
905. Look, look,Copy !req
906. you're the hero that this
police station needs.Copy !req
907. No, no, that's not true.Copy !req
908. You're the hero this whole town needs.Copy !req
909. That's the Spaghettiman, that's not me.Copy !req
910. Not yet.Copy !req
911. What does that mean?Copy !req
912. If you want this town to be safe,Copy !req
913. you have to set him on the right path.Copy !req
914. I can't.Copy !req
915. A real hero could.Copy !req
916. Thank you.Copy !req
917. So.Copy !req
918. How long have you been
fighting crime with spaghetti?Copy !req
919. Well, I wouldn't reallyCopy !req
920. call it fighting crime, necessarily.Copy !req
921. More like, earning a paycheck.Copy !req
922. Who's paying you?Copy !req
923. All the people I save.Copy !req
924. What do you mean?Copy !req
925. Well, I go out
looking for crimes to stop.Copy !req
926. And when I stop 'em,Copy !req
927. I demand payment from the people I save.Copy !req
928. Or, people reach out to me
on craigslist.Copy !req
929. Send me anonymous emails and I sort ofCopy !req
930. pick and choose based on
the rate they offer.Copy !req
931. What if somebody hires youCopy !req
932. to hurt someone who's innocent?Copy !req
933. Well, I don't do it.Copy !req
934. How do you know?Copy !req
935. It's like a superhero thing, to know.Copy !req
936. So it's not an altruistic endeavor?Copy !req
937. No, and don't you judge me.Copy !req
938. Okay, it pays the bills.Copy !req
939. Hey, no judgment here.Copy !req
940. I get it.Copy !req
941. I don't like what I do,
but I gotta pay rent.Copy !req
942. Among other things.Copy !req
943. So what do you do?Copy !req
944. Follow me around?Copy !req
945. Make those videos and make money off me?Copy !req
946. Basically.Copy !req
947. I track down crashes and crimes,Copy !req
948. get footage of it,Copy !req
949. and I sell it to
newspapers and TV outlets.Copy !req
950. Is the money good?Copy !req
951. It's getting better.Copy !req
952. Let me guess.Copy !req
953. You want me to go out chasing crazierCopy !req
954. and scarier crimes and
acting real nice to peopleCopy !req
955. so your videos can do better.Copy !req
956. Frankly, I don't give
a shit what you do.Copy !req
957. It'd just be nice to have a
heads-up before you do it.Copy !req
958. Maybe a call or a text.Copy !req
959. Email.Copy !req
960. That way I have enough time,Copy !req
961. I can get setup and get
a better shot of it.Copy !req
962. Oh yeah?Copy !req
963. What do I get out of it?Copy !req
964. Let's split the money.Copy !req
965. Ooh, so I could make double the money?Copy !req
966. It's a win for the both of us.Copy !req
967. But if you have my number,Copy !req
968. what stops you from turning
it in to the police?Copy !req
969. Why would I cut out a
huge source of my income?Copy !req
970. Moved here to make movies,
ended up chasing ambulances,Copy !req
971. now a crazy son of a bitch
with a bag on his head.Copy !req
972. Wife's gonna love this.Copy !req
973. Yeah, well, it could be worse, you know.Copy !req
974. Bunch of ninjas could
break into your apartment,Copy !req
975. kidnap your pregnant wife
and slap her around a bit.Copy !req
976. Perspective, guy.Copy !req
977. I'm offering a little perspective.Copy !req
978. Jeeze, lighten up.Copy !req
979. Can I get a to-go box, please?Copy !req
980. Sup?Copy !req
981. Throw me one of those bad boys.Copy !req
982. No, this is the last one.Copy !req
983. Okay, I'll go for the fridge.Copy !req
984. Uh, I drank all those.Copy !req
985. Okay.Copy !req
986. Is something going on?Copy !req
987. Do you realize that you
could make a difference?Copy !req
988. That you could be a real hero?Copy !req
989. Change the city, and
make it a better place?Copy !req
990. And instead you parade
around like an asshole.Copy !req
991. And only do nice things for
people who give you money.Copy !req
992. Yeah, well, I'm still helping people.Copy !req
993. No, you're not.Copy !req
994. You're taking advantage of them.Copy !req
995. This shouldn't be about you.Copy !req
996. It should be about them.Copy !req
997. It should be about making them feel likeCopy !req
998. someone in this city cares about 'em.Copy !req
999. And it should be about
making them understandCopy !req
1000. that Good can beat Evil.Copy !req
1001. Maybe I don't want that responsibility!Copy !req
1002. You don't have a choice!Copy !req
1003. I would kill to be able to do
what you do.Copy !req
1004. Just for one day.Copy !req
1005. But I can't.Copy !req
1006. Yeah, well if I could
trade with you, what I have?Copy !req
1007. I would in a second.Copy !req
1008. Actually that's not true.Copy !req
1009. I make a lot of money, I like what I do.Copy !req
1010. Go to hell.Copy !req
1011. I can't handle that pressure, okay?Copy !req
1012. I can't keep a job.Copy !req
1013. I can't keep a girlfriend.Copy !req
1014. I can barely keep a friend in you.Copy !req
1015. Taking care of an entire city.Copy !req
1016. You insane?Copy !req
1017. I'm scared man.Copy !req
1018. I'm scared every second I'm out there.Copy !req
1019. And the thought...Copy !req
1020. That an entire city needs me?Copy !req
1021. Frightens the hell out of me.Copy !req
1022. You're a coward.Copy !req
1023. Banner Group video services.Copy !req
1024. Hey, it's the Spaghettiman.Copy !req
1025. I got us a gig.Copy !req
1026. Nice, what's the address?Copy !req
1027. Hey buddy, how
do you like your new phone?Copy !req
1028. Who the hell are you?Copy !req
1029. You know,Copy !req
1030. if you're gonna steal a phone
from a bar.Copy !req
1031. You might want to turn off
automatic photo uploadsCopy !req
1032. before taking all those stupid selfies.Copy !req
1033. Whatever man.Copy !req
1034. Whatever.Copy !req
1035. Stop touching me!Copy !req
1036. Hah, you've been served... spaghetti!Copy !req
1037. That is dumb.Copy !req
1038. Really, ah it's,Copy !req
1039. you know what?Copy !req
1040. You didn't hear that.Copy !req
1041. I delivered a pretty great lineCopy !req
1042. after I wrestled the phone
out of his hand.Copy !req
1043. Nah, it wasn't that great.Copy !req
1044. But I can cut it.Copy !req
1045. Okay, coolCopy !req
1046. did you get the shot?Copy !req
1047. Yeah.Copy !req
1048. Awesome, okay.Copy !req
1049. So, let's go return this phone.Copy !req
1050. And then you'll get his story,Copy !req
1051. so it doesn't look like
I'm just some thugCopy !req
1052. who jacked a phone.Copy !req
1053. Sounds good.Copy !req
1054. Alright, turn in the footageCopy !req
1055. and then go collect our cash.Copy !req
1056. Not yet.Copy !req
1057. What do you mean?Copy !req
1058. First we have to sell the video.Copy !req
1059. Then I fill out an invoice.Copy !req
1060. And then we get paid.Copy !req
1061. In like, two to three weeks.Copy !req
1062. Two to three weeks?Copy !req
1063. Legally they have 45 days to do it.Copy !req
1064. But most do it in two to three weeks.Copy !req
1065. Two, forty-five... how
does anybody live like this?Copy !req
1066. That's freelance for you, man.Copy !req
1067. I mean, I'm still waiting to get paidCopy !req
1068. for the first video I got of you.Copy !req
1069. Horse-shit.Copy !req
1070. But, we speed up the processCopy !req
1071. if we hurry up and get it in the system.Copy !req
1072. So, let's return the phone.Copy !req
1073. And I'll swing by my place
and upload it really quick.Copy !req
1074. Great. Great.Copy !req
1075. So what's that speed it
up like, two, three days?Copy !req
1076. Nah, it's still a couple weeks.Copy !req
1077. Gah! Come on!Copy !req
1078. I don't have it, I swear.Copy !req
1079. You know that's notCopy !req
1080. the right answer, Derek.Copy !req
1081. I swear, I wouldn't lie to you.Copy !req
1082. Oh, but, that's what you said last time.Copy !req
1083. Wasn't it?Copy !req
1084. And, you had it on you the whole time.Copy !req
1085. But this time's different.Copy !req
1086. I'm low on cash.Copy !req
1087. My wife, her car crashed,
took us for all we've got.Copy !req
1088. My kid, he's been sick.Copy !req
1089. You just, you just gotta believe me.Copy !req
1090. Buddy, why didn't you say something?Copy !req
1091. I believe you.Copy !req
1092. Really?Copy !req
1093. I believe your son is gonna have to ask,Copy !req
1094. "Why did daddy have to die?"Copy !req
1095. "When if he just paid right
now he'd have been just fine."Copy !req
1096. Oh, look at that, Derek.Copy !req
1097. Oh no, this looks like a little bit moreCopy !req
1098. than what you owe me.Copy !req
1099. It's all I have.Copy !req
1100. It's all I'll take, Derek.Copy !req
1101. You can consider the rest a
down payment on the next round.Copy !req
1102. Tough, but fair.Copy !req
1103. Who's there?Copy !req
1104. Relax,Copy !req
1105. I'm not here to bust your balls.Copy !req
1106. I'm here to offer you a job.Copy !req
1107. Yeah, I'm not interested.
Thanks.Copy !req
1108. How many of your menCopy !req
1109. have been taken down
by the Spaghettiman?Copy !req
1110. What's it to ya?Copy !req
1111. How'd you like to fix the situation.Copy !req
1112. I'm listening.Copy !req
1113. I might have a way to beat him,Copy !req
1114. if you've got the men.Copy !req
1115. Oh I've got the men.Copy !req
1116. Then let's take him down.Copy !req
1117. Who are you?Copy !req
1118. All you need to know is ICopy !req
1119. have the info to take him...Copy !req
1120. Okay, now I see your face.Copy !req
1121. Tell me what you know.Copy !req
1122. I know the Spaghettiman.Copy !req
1123. I know him, alright?Copy !req
1124. I know what his hopes
and what his dreams are.Copy !req
1125. And I know what makes him
tick more than anyone.Copy !req
1126. And I know how to take him out.Copy !req
1127. And what do you want?Copy !req
1128. Why do you wanna take
down the Spaghettiman?Copy !req
1129. Why?Copy !req
1130. Because it's what this cityCopy !req
1131. needs.Copy !req
1132. You know, it's not polite to stare.Copy !req
1133. Sorry.Copy !req
1134. It's just not everyday
my husband brings homeCopy !req
1135. a man in a paper sack who shoots...Copy !req
1136. Spaghetti, from his hands?Copy !req
1137. And asks for soup?Copy !req
1138. Mm, good soup.Copy !req
1139. Did you make it from scratch?Copy !req
1140. No, does it taste like it is?Copy !req
1141. No.Copy !req
1142. You and Anthony working together?Copy !req
1143. We just started.Copy !req
1144. That's nice.Copy !req
1145. Well, hopefully.Copy !req
1146. He said he could make some good money.Copy !req
1147. And uh,Copy !req
1148. I could sure use it.Copy !req
1149. You don't have a day job?Copy !req
1150. You're not like a rich billionaire
who lost his parents.Copy !req
1151. Or?Copy !req
1152. No way, I wish.Copy !req
1153. This is it.Copy !req
1154. This is my income.Copy !req
1155. Does anyone know who you really are?Copy !req
1156. Yeah, I have this friend.Copy !req
1157. Uhm, he's kinda weird about it though.Copy !req
1158. Wants me to do good.Copy !req
1159. Wants me to go out there
and be a superhero.Copy !req
1160. For free.Copy !req
1161. But I figure, I can go out,
do good, and collect money.Copy !req
1162. Yeah.Copy !req
1163. Uh, sure.Copy !req
1164. I could see both sides.Copy !req
1165. Eeeh.Copy !req
1166. You ever get scared?Copy !req
1167. Scared?Copy !req
1168. Yeah like, in a fight?Copy !req
1169. Yeah.Copy !req
1170. But you still do it.Copy !req
1171. I have to.Copy !req
1172. So maybe that's what
makes you a hero, then?Copy !req
1173. Nope, I just need the money.Copy !req
1174. I hear that.Copy !req
1175. How, uhm, how far along...Copy !req
1176. Is that?Copy !req
1177. Five months.Copy !req
1178. Identical twins.Copy !req
1179. Twins?Copy !req
1180. Oh, that sucks.Copy !req
1181. It doesn't suck.Copy !req
1182. I mean, that doesn't suck.Copy !req
1183. It's just,Copy !req
1184. It's gonna be expensive.Copy !req
1185. Way... very expensive.Copy !req
1186. Yes. Very much.Copy !req
1187. Luckily, uhm...Copy !req
1188. I have insurance with
my job, so, you know.Copy !req
1189. Not completely screwed.Copy !req
1190. Well, Anthony said these videosCopy !req
1191. are gonna make some good money.Copy !req
1192. So, uh, let's hope we keep doing good.Copy !req
1193. Let's just hope
Anthony doesn't get hurt.Copy !req
1194. Okay?Copy !req
1195. Come on.Copy !req
1196. We'll be fine.Copy !req
1197. I don't want my kids to
grow up without a father.Copy !req
1198. I grew up with a father,Copy !req
1199. and look how I turned out.Copy !req
1200. Mm, can I sing a song to your kids?Copy !req
1201. What?Copy !req
1202. That's all I have.Copy !req
1203. How's it going?Copy !req
1204. Good.Copy !req
1205. Almost done submitting this stuff.Copy !req
1206. And I'm gonna take him home.Copy !req
1207. Weird guy, huh?Copy !req
1208. Mm.Copy !req
1209. For a guy with a paper bag
over his head,Copy !req
1210. he's not that weird.Copy !req
1211. Is it safe, Tony?Copy !req
1212. Yeah, totally.Copy !req
1213. He's a psychopath with
a paper bag over his head.Copy !req
1214. We don't know he's a psychopath.Copy !req
1215. Yeah, but what if he is?Copy !req
1216. Well, then, at least he likes me?Copy !req
1217. I finished with the soup.Copy !req
1218. You want me to put this on the counter?Copy !req
1219. Uhm, actually, if you could rinse it outCopy !req
1220. and put it in the
dishwasher, that'd be great.Copy !req
1221. Oh, you have a dishwasher? Awesome.Copy !req
1222. That is cool.Copy !req
1223. How much longer are you guys gonna be?Copy !req
1224. Twelve minutes?Copy !req
1225. Can't he just walk home?Copy !req
1226. Look, he asked me for a rideCopy !req
1227. and I already said I'd take him, so...Copy !req
1228. How far away does he live?Copy !req
1229. I don't know.Copy !req
1230. But you know, him being hereCopy !req
1231. is just as much your fault
as it is mine.Copy !req
1232. How is that?Copy !req
1233. You gave him soup.Copy !req
1234. He said he was hungry.Copy !req
1235. He asked for soup.Copy !req
1236. You could've given him a sandwich.Copy !req
1237. Soup means stay.Copy !req
1238. Sandwich is, portable.Copy !req
1239. Hey, can I borrow this Sideways DVD?Copy !req
1240. Uh, yeah.Copy !req
1241. I've been wanting to get into wine.Copy !req
1242. This is an awesome way to get into wine.Copy !req
1243. Is the money good?Copy !req
1244. Footage of him gets me twice as muchCopy !req
1245. as what I normally get.Copy !req
1246. Okay.Copy !req
1247. I say we do this until
these guys pop out of here.Copy !req
1248. When they're out, you're out.Copy !req
1249. Sounds good to me.Copy !req
1250. Just don't get yourself killed.Copy !req
1251. Please.Copy !req
1252. Kat, I'm gonna be fine.Copy !req
1253. I shoot from so far away, most the timeCopy !req
1254. I'm out of the equation anyway.Copy !req
1255. Yeah, except when he's at our house.Copy !req
1256. Dishwasher's broken.Copy !req
1257. I'm gonna go.Copy !req
1258. I'll walk home, don't worry.Copy !req
1259. Thank you.Copy !req
1260. These are the bestCopy !req
1261. and brightest guys I have, boss.Copy !req
1262. They better be.Copy !req
1263. Alright, uh, let's get started.Copy !req
1264. Hi.Copy !req
1265. Name.Copy !req
1266. My name's Amir, I'm a CPA.Copy !req
1267. My name is Dwayne.Copy !req
1268. Call me Dean.Copy !req
1269. Uh, Gabriel.Copy !req
1270. Name is Nightbandit.Copy !req
1271. Occupation.Copy !req
1272. I'm a bandit.Copy !req
1273. Who works at night.Copy !req
1274. Well, I'm an ex-special forces.Copy !req
1275. But, uh, by day I'm a metro bus-driver.Copy !req
1276. I'm an unemployed hi-hop artist by day.Copy !req
1277. But, like a random odds
and ends guy at night.Copy !req
1278. I'm a volunteer at a-a-a,
animal shelter for cats.Copy !req
1279. I lay bricks.Copy !req
1280. What's your criminal history?Copy !req
1281. Well once I left the special forces,Copy !req
1282. I, uh, did my time as an
ax-murderer for a little while.Copy !req
1283. Larsony, arsony, uh, grand theft hydro.Copy !req
1284. Well, I stole a pack
of gum in second grade.Copy !req
1285. Uhm, haven't gotten caught yet.Copy !req
1286. Let's just say... I've
laid a lot of bricks.Copy !req
1287. Show me some moves.Copy !req
1288. You get 'em with the roll.Copy !req
1289. Spin around.Copy !req
1290. Throat.Copy !req
1291. Yeah, so there's that, you know.Copy !req
1292. And it's for fights, yeah.Copy !req
1293. This is your wallet.Copy !req
1294. I stole it.Copy !req
1295. 'Cause I'm a night bandit.Copy !req
1296. I wanna do a little role-playing.Copy !req
1297. Spaghettiman comes up from behind you.Copy !req
1298. What do you do?Copy !req
1299. I grab his hand.Copy !req
1300. Put him down.Copy !req
1301. And immediately I put my
knee, my knee on his neck.Copy !req
1302. And then I neutralize the
situation and back off.Copy !req
1303. Well, I just uh, turn back on a dimeCopy !req
1304. and punch him right in
the mouth with a fist.Copy !req
1305. Well, let's say he's
coming from the front.Copy !req
1306. Grab him by the waist.Copy !req
1307. Take out his center of gravity.Copy !req
1308. I pull my head in, so my
neck isn't susceptible.Copy !req
1309. Grab his elbow, put him
down, knee on the neck.Copy !req
1310. Grab the arm, neutralize the situation.Copy !req
1311. By then I should already haveCopy !req
1312. a protective brick wall behind me.Copy !req
1313. I turn around.Copy !req
1314. Reach in between his legs.Copy !req
1315. And rip his dick off.Copy !req
1316. Just like my grandmother taught me.Copy !req
1317. Restart.
This time I attack him.Copy !req
1318. He's grabbed my arm.Copy !req
1319. Right?Copy !req
1320. He puts me down.Copy !req
1321. His knee is on my neck.Copy !req
1322. And he won that one.Copy !req
1323. So, what d'you think boss?Copy !req
1324. I think I chose the wrong
man to lead this fight.Copy !req
1325. 'Scuse me?Copy !req
1326. You brought me a bunch of morons.Copy !req
1327. Spaghettiman has taken out
all the best guys I know.Copy !req
1328. This is what we have left.Copy !req
1329. If this is the best you
have, then we're going to lose.Copy !req
1330. Listen, fighting on the streetsCopy !req
1331. is not like your normal job.Copy !req
1332. You can't interview for it.Copy !req
1333. I told you that.Copy !req
1334. These guys think differently from you.Copy !req
1335. Their brains are wired differently.Copy !req
1336. They're going to react
when punches are comingCopy !req
1337. at their faces, not questions.Copy !req
1338. Then we're gonna need more.Copy !req
1339. More?Copy !req
1340. Yeah, go get more.Copy !req
1341. I've something to do.Copy !req
1342. Hello?Copy !req
1343. Why didn't you call me?Copy !req
1344. About what?Copy !req
1345. Your gig last night?Copy !req
1346. I didn't have a gig last night.Copy !req
1347. You didn't?Copy !req
1348. No, and if I did I would've called you.Copy !req
1349. It's all over the news today.Copy !req
1350. A guy was found beaten downtown,Copy !req
1351. his wallet was stolen,Copy !req
1352. he had spaghetti stuck
on his face and arms.Copy !req
1353. Sound familiar?Copy !req
1354. Wait, what?Copy !req
1355. What guy?Copy !req
1356. I don't know, you tell me.Copy !req
1357. Sounds to me like you were
doing shit downtown last night.Copy !req
1358. You think it was a copycat?Copy !req
1359. I don't know.Copy !req
1360. I'll keep my ears open.Copy !req
1361. See if I hear anything on the scanner.Copy !req
1362. If I do, I'll let you know.Copy !req
1363. Okay. Thanks.Copy !req
1364. In the meantime, if you do go out again.Copy !req
1365. Will you please call me first?Copy !req
1366. It's not just a huge chunk
of money for the both of us.Copy !req
1367. It's also an alibi.Copy !req
1368. I will, lay off me, mom.Copy !req
1369. Hey.Copy !req
1370. You see this thing about
the dude getting beat up?Copy !req
1371. No.Copy !req
1372. Yeah man some guy
got beat up in the park.Copy !req
1373. Spaghetti all over him.Copy !req
1374. Cops think it was me.Copy !req
1375. Was it?Copy !req
1376. No.Copy !req
1377. Hmm.Copy !req
1378. What, you don't believe me?Copy !req
1379. No, I believe you.Copy !req
1380. Then what's the problem?Copy !req
1381. Got work.Copy !req
1382. Hey, where are you?Copy !req
1383. I'm here.Copy !req
1384. Okay, well, hurry up.Copy !req
1385. I'm gonna check this place out.Copy !req
1386. Hello?Copy !req
1387. Hello?Copy !req
1388. Spaghettiman here.Copy !req
1389. Oh my God, oh my God.Copy !req
1390. Hey buddy.Copy !req
1391. Hey, hey, what happened to you man?Copy !req
1392. Oh hey.Copy !req
1393. Hello.Copy !req
1394. Jesus, you cannot
sneak up on a guy like that.Copy !req
1395. I'm tryin' to...Copy !req
1396. The hell is going on here?Copy !req
1397. How you doing, bud?Copy !req
1398. You with us?Copy !req
1399. Wha, what happened?Copy !req
1400. Nothing man, you're okay.Copy !req
1401. Wait, who you calling?Copy !req
1402. Hey, who's he calling?Copy !req
1403. Hello? I'd like to report
a crime in Grant Park.Copy !req
1404. Now, I just need you
to speak into this phoneCopy !req
1405. and tell them Spaghettiman did it.Copy !req
1406. You can do that, right?Copy !req
1407. Ah you guys are tryin' to set me up.Copy !req
1408. You're tryin' to pin this on me.Copy !req
1409. Yeah, well it ain't happenin' buddy.Copy !req
1410. This guy owes me, he ain't saying shit.Copy !req
1411. It was Spaghettiman.Copy !req
1412. Dude, come on, really?Copy !req
1413. Sorry man.Copy !req
1414. Get in the car!Copy !req
1415. Get in the car!Copy !req
1416. What? What's going on?Copy !req
1417. They shot the hobo.Copy !req
1418. Is he dead?Copy !req
1419. Super dead, come on.Copy !req
1420. Get in, get in.Copy !req
1421. What the hell just happened?Copy !req
1422. They shot him, man.Copy !req
1423. The hobo.Copy !req
1424. They beat him and then
they shot him in the head.Copy !req
1425. Jesus Christ.Copy !req
1426. Yeah.Copy !req
1427. Sucks for him.Copy !req
1428. But what about me?Copy !req
1429. I had to see his brains
leak out all over the place.Copy !req
1430. Do you know who they were?Copy !req
1431. No clue.Copy !req
1432. But they're gonna think it was me.Copy !req
1433. He was on the phone and he
said, "Spaghettiman did it."Copy !req
1434. Someone's going through this
much trouble to set you up...Copy !req
1435. You must've really pissed somebody off.Copy !req
1436. Yeah, but who?Copy !req
1437. Blood was coming out of his earsCopy !req
1438. and brains were coming out of his eyes.Copy !req
1439. Are you sure he's dead?Copy !req
1440. Maybe we can go back and...Copy !req
1441. I mean, he might still be alive.Copy !req
1442. You can't be aliveCopy !req
1443. with brains coming out of your eyes.Copy !req
1444. What the hell happened in here?Copy !req
1445. Dale, are you okay?Copy !req
1446. Clark, is that you?Copy !req
1447. Don't say my real name.Copy !req
1448. You just said mine!Copy !req
1449. You're a nobody.
I'm the Spaghettiman.Copy !req
1450. Should I call 911?Copy !req
1451. Who's that?Copy !req
1452. No.Copy !req
1453. Don't call 911.Copy !req
1454. This is Anthony.Copy !req
1455. He's been putting up all
those cool videos of me.Copy !req
1456. You're working with this guy?Copy !req
1457. Ah, they destroyed the shelfCopy !req
1458. and the desk is all messed up.Copy !req
1459. And this plate! Aw, they
messed up your favorite plate!Copy !req
1460. Something's going on.Copy !req
1461. Yeah something's going on.Copy !req
1462. And it's your fault.Copy !req
1463. How the hell do you
figure this is my fault?Copy !req
1464. It's your stupid videos.Copy !req
1465. They put my paper bag
face all over the place.Copy !req
1466. People know I exist and they're pissed.Copy !req
1467. Even if there weren't any videos,Copy !req
1468. you're still taking
criminals off the streets.Copy !req
1469. Criminals with connections
to other criminals.Copy !req
1470. Get out of my house.Copy !req
1471. Fine.Copy !req
1472. And don't you dare call me.Copy !req
1473. You're the one calling
me all the time, asshole.Copy !req
1474. Yeah, well, I won't anymore.Copy !req
1475. I'm so sorry.Copy !req
1476. I don't know how they found me.Copy !req
1477. You've gotta go get 'em, Clark.Copy !req
1478. You've gotta get 'em.Copy !req
1479. No.Copy !req
1480. No way man.Copy !req
1481. I'm done.Copy !req
1482. What, do I have to pay you?Copy !req
1483. No, it's way too dangerous.Copy !req
1484. I saw a hobo get shot in the head.Copy !req
1485. People are trying to frame me.Copy !req
1486. And now all this?Copy !req
1487. I can't take this anymore.Copy !req
1488. But what about me?Copy !req
1489. What about you?Copy !req
1490. You think finding the people
that did thisCopy !req
1491. is going to make any difference?Copy !req
1492. Word's gonna get out.Copy !req
1493. They're gonna send those people
back hereCopy !req
1494. to finish the job.Copy !req
1495. No way man!Copy !req
1496. I'm done.Copy !req
1497. I'm gonna get you some ice.Copy !req
1498. Got some ice!Copy !req
1499. Easy does it.Copy !req
1500. Put you right here.Copy !req
1501. And alright.Copy !req
1502. Uh huh, it's your favorite.Copy !req
1503. There, get you some milk.Copy !req
1504. Woo!Copy !req
1505. Good.Copy !req
1506. Ah!Copy !req
1507. I'm sorry.Copy !req
1508. There you go.Copy !req
1509. Thank you.Copy !req
1510. Oh that's good, huh?Copy !req
1511. Yeah, I told you.Copy !req
1512. Peter Gallagher's really good
in The O.C.Copy !req
1513. Okay, let me experience it on my own.Copy !req
1514. Just, you think like, there's
no way he's gonna be good.Copy !req
1515. And he's like, great.Copy !req
1516. And that makes it amazing.Copy !req
1517. And those, I mean, those eyebrows man.Copy !req
1518. Jesus, they pierce right through you.Copy !req
1519. You won't stop talking about 'em.Copy !req
1520. I just want him to be my dad, you know?Copy !req
1521. Let me get that.Copy !req
1522. Thank you.Copy !req
1523. Sit back and relax.Copy !req
1524. Ah, thanks man.Copy !req
1525. Oh, this is where Ryan...Copy !req
1526. Which one's Ryan?Copy !req
1527. He's the main guy.Copy !req
1528. He talks about how he's broodingCopy !req
1529. and it's like really meta.Copy !req
1530. He's, this character is aware of,Copy !req
1531. that he is this character.Copy !req
1532. Who's Mischa Barton?Copy !req
1533. Huh?Copy !req
1534. Shouldn't you be out there,Copy !req
1535. finding the guys who did this to me?Copy !req
1536. Shhh-sh-sh-sh-sh-sh.Copy !req
1537. You need your strength.Copy !req
1538. Clark, I can bathe myself.Copy !req
1539. Don't worry, I got it.Copy !req
1540. No man, I'm feeling a whole lot better.Copy !req
1541. And I really don't need you
to be in here.Copy !req
1542. Hey.Copy !req
1543. Don't be too proud to
ask for a little help.Copy !req
1544. You know what'd help?Copy !req
1545. If you went out and fought
the guys who did this to me.Copy !req
1546. Holy cow.Copy !req
1547. Did you know you have a mole back here?Copy !req
1548. Hey, are you going out?Copy !req
1549. Yeah.Copy !req
1550. To destroy this.Copy !req
1551. You can't!Copy !req
1552. What's your deal, Dale?Copy !req
1553. I've done nothing but help you outCopy !req
1554. over the last few days.Copy !req
1555. It's my fault that this
whole place got destroyed.Copy !req
1556. It's my fault that you got beat up.Copy !req
1557. And it's all because of this.Copy !req
1558. So I'm doin' my best to make it right.Copy !req
1559. You can make up for it
by getting back out there.Copy !req
1560. You hated what I did!Copy !req
1561. I did.Copy !req
1562. But don't you feel some
sense of responsibility?Copy !req
1563. An actual calling?Copy !req
1564. Nah.Copy !req
1565. It's time for Plan B.Copy !req
1566. What do you want?Copy !req
1567. Where is it?Copy !req
1568. Do you know the number?Copy !req
1569. No, I don't know the damn number!Copy !req
1570. How did they connect us?Copy !req
1571. I don't know.Copy !req
1572. Did you tell anyone you work with?Copy !req
1573. No.Copy !req
1574. Maybe they followed us
and the saw us together.Copy !req
1575. I doubt it.Copy !req
1576. Dale's a cop.Copy !req
1577. Maybe he can just go in and...Copy !req
1578. Wait.Copy !req
1579. You don't think...Copy !req
1580. It can't...Copy !req
1581. He's the only one who knows
you and I work together.Copy !req
1582. It can't be.Copy !req
1583. Call him!Copy !req
1584. Hey man, what's up?Copy !req
1585. Oh, thank God.Copy !req
1586. What?Copy !req
1587. Just uh, to hear that you answeredCopy !req
1588. and everything's fine.Copy !req
1589. Oh, uh, totally.Copy !req
1590. Cool, cool.Copy !req
1591. So I'll see you later then?Copy !req
1592. Oh hey, real quick.Copy !req
1593. Does Anthony wanna
hear his wife's voice?Copy !req
1594. She's a really terrible
crier, it's so annoying.Copy !req
1595. Hey, Keto, take care of that.Copy !req
1596. You son of a bitch!Copy !req
1597. I'll kill the bastard.Copy !req
1598. No no no no.Copy !req
1599. What?Copy !req
1600. Where are we going?Copy !req
1601. I don't know.Copy !req
1602. Ch'ello?Copy !req
1603. Where are we going?Copy !req
1604. Oh, that'd be good to know, huh?Copy !req
1605. Yeah, that'd be good to know, Dale.Copy !req
1606. Where's Dean?Copy !req
1607. You didn't hear man?Copy !req
1608. Got crushed by his own brick wall.Copy !req
1609. That sucks.Copy !req
1610. Hey uhm, how much you guys wanna betCopy !req
1611. I'll be the one that
takes Spaghettiman down.Copy !req
1612. Incorrect.Copy !req
1613. That'll be me.Copy !req
1614. You wanna bet 50 on that?Copy !req
1615. Oh yeah.Copy !req
1616. I think I'll be the one
to take Spaghettiman out.Copy !req
1617. Yeah, what makes you think that?Copy !req
1618. Simple.Copy !req
1619. Chop to the neck.Copy !req
1620. Don't you think if
anyone could've done that,Copy !req
1621. he would've done that already.Copy !req
1622. I chop.Copy !req
1623. And then I kick.Copy !req
1624. Yeah, I think all
you guys are gonna die.Copy !req
1625. Nah, nah guys, it's simple, alright?Copy !req
1626. You walk up to him.Copy !req
1627. You grab his dick.Copy !req
1628. You rip it off.Copy !req
1629. Uh, if you can get that close.Copy !req
1630. I'll get so close to his
dick that I can smell it.Copy !req
1631. Then I'll rip it off.Copy !req
1632. It'll be easy.Copy !req
1633. Sweep the leg.Copy !req
1634. Punch him so hard in the nose,
the nose goes into his brain.Copy !req
1635. And, if I'm allowed,
I'll take the skull home.Copy !req
1636. Use it as a cereal bowl.Copy !req
1637. I've done the nose
trick to a lot of guys.Copy !req
1638. It works really well.Copy !req
1639. Oh yeah?Copy !req
1640. How many.Copy !req
1641. I don't have to prove anything to you.Copy !req
1642. Shut up.Copy !req
1643. You guys realize it won't
be this easy, right?Copy !req
1644. If, and when you guys
fail, I will beat him.Copy !req
1645. One way.Copy !req
1646. The straight vertical fist to the faceCopy !req
1647. with the step-in elbow to follow it up.Copy !req
1648. He's gonna expect another
straight strikeCopy !req
1649. so I step off on the angle,Copy !req
1650. spinning elbow.Copy !req
1651. Now I come back, around on the angle.Copy !req
1652. Across the face.Copy !req
1653. That's a knuckle-rake and a back-fist.Copy !req
1654. I step off again on the angle.Copy !req
1655. Chop to the neck.Copy !req
1656. Hit him up with the knee.Copy !req
1657. Now that he's up, he's
injured, his nose is bleeding.Copy !req
1658. He's bloody, I drop levels,Copy !req
1659. two hard body-shots set him
up for the straight jab.Copy !req
1660. Knock-out finish.Copy !req
1661. That, is how you beat a man.Copy !req
1662. You got that?Copy !req
1663. Yup.Copy !req
1664. You know, or we could just,Copy !req
1665. chop him to the neck.Copy !req
1666. But no, what you've got is, is the best.Copy !req
1667. Whoa whoa.Copy !req
1668. Where are you going?Copy !req
1669. I gotta go get her.Copy !req
1670. No, you don't.Copy !req
1671. It's too dangerous in there.Copy !req
1672. Besides, we don't knowCopy !req
1673. what's going on in front of those doors.Copy !req
1674. They're looking for me.Copy !req
1675. I'm gonna go in.Copy !req
1676. You circle around back.Copy !req
1677. Find some other way in.Copy !req
1678. Great.Copy !req
1679. Where's Dale?Copy !req
1680. What?Copy !req
1681. DammitCopy !req
1682. Fuck, are you serious?Copy !req
1683. Okay, now where's Dale?Copy !req
1684. That's not your concern.Copy !req
1685. Is Katie safe?Copy !req
1686. That is not your concern.Copy !req
1687. Where is she?Copy !req
1688. It's not your concern.Copy !req
1689. Okay tough guy.Copy !req
1690. What is my concern?Copy !req
1691. How fast you wanna die?Copy !req
1692. Fight!Copy !req
1693. I got this.Copy !req
1694. Hey guy, I don't know why you'reCopy !req
1695. standing there with that
stupid smile on your faceCopy !req
1696. when I just took out all your men.Copy !req
1697. Oh, you're still gonna smile then?Copy !req
1698. Alright.Copy !req
1699. You asked for it.Copy !req
1700. Hiyah-hah.Copy !req
1701. Wha, whoa man.Copy !req
1702. Kat.Copy !req
1703. Anthony!Copy !req
1704. Come on, let's go.Copy !req
1705. Not yet.Copy !req
1706. We have to see if Clark's
gonna achieve his destiny.Copy !req
1707. Okay.Copy !req
1708. Shirt ripper!Copy !req
1709. Ha ha ha, oh man!Copy !req
1710. Oh, man...Copy !req
1711. What is he doing?Copy !req
1712. No!Copy !req
1713. No!Copy !req
1714. Ah. Don't.Copy !req
1715. Stop.Copy !req
1716. Stop it.Copy !req
1717. This wasn't supposed to happen!Copy !req
1718. I don't give a shit about
what's supposed to happen.Copy !req
1719. The Spaghettiman is dead!Copy !req
1720. I didn't hire you to do this.Copy !req
1721. Look, your plan was good
but it had one problem.Copy !req
1722. And I fixed that problem
and made it a lot better.Copy !req
1723. Now, we can discuss this problem.Copy !req
1724. But you can take a look at what happenedCopy !req
1725. to the last guy who disagreed with me.Copy !req
1726. What the?Copy !req
1727. Dale, get back here...Copy !req
1728. Katie, you're alive.Copy !req
1729. Yeah, I'm fine, uh...Copy !req
1730. Did you guys see
what was going on in here?Copy !req
1731. I was punching.Copy !req
1732. I was kicking.Copy !req
1733. Things were flying everywhere.Copy !req
1734. Yeah, it was on the
camera in the other room.Copy !req
1735. Dale was recording this entire thing?Copy !req
1736. I don't know.Copy !req
1737. I was a little preoccupied.Copy !req
1738. That sucks.Copy !req
1739. It would be really cool if he was.Copy !req
1740. I was doing some real
ninja stuff, you know.Copy !req
1741. Then I was dead!Copy !req
1742. I was dead and I came back to life.Copy !req
1743. I'm standing right here now.Copy !req
1744. Yeah, we were here.Copy !req
1745. Come on Anthony.Copy !req
1746. Don't act like it wasn't totally cool.Copy !req
1747. I don't think it
wasn't totally not cool.Copy !req
1748. I'm wondering if you're
gonna go catch Dale.Copy !req
1749. Yeah, I am.Copy !req
1750. Forgot my shoes!Copy !req
1751. Dale.Copy !req
1752. Dale, where are you?Copy !req
1753. Dale, get out here right now.Copy !req
1754. Dale, where did you...Copy !req
1755. Hey!Copy !req
1756. Up the fire escape, Dale?Copy !req
1757. How do I, you pulled up
the ladder, Dale.Copy !req
1758. Damn Dale,Copy !req
1759. have to chase his stupid butt
up a ladder.Copy !req
1760. By climbing on a pole.Copy !req
1761. Dale, you pulled up the
fire escape, you idiot.Copy !req
1762. Jesus, I got killed
and come back for this.Copy !req
1763. Dale has me climbing up a damn buildingCopy !req
1764. chasing his stupid butt up a ladder.Copy !req
1765. Judging by the state of the fire escapeCopy !req
1766. this roof is surely not enforced.Copy !req
1767. Probably didn't even getCopy !req
1768. the building owner's permission...Copy !req
1769. What the hell are you doing, Dale?Copy !req
1770. This is it.Copy !req
1771. What do you mean?Copy !req
1772. Don't you see?Copy !req
1773. This is where you're gonna becomeCopy !req
1774. the superhero you need to be.Copy !req
1775. You tried to kill meCopy !req
1776. down there with your ninjas!Copy !req
1777. No, I set you up to beat them.Copy !req
1778. And now you have a choice.Copy !req
1779. Are you gonna kill the villain?Copy !req
1780. Or are you gonna save your friend?Copy !req
1781. Get away from that ledge, Dale.Copy !req
1782. No.Copy !req
1783. The Spaghettiman.Copy !req
1784. My true friend.Copy !req
1785. And my hero.Copy !req
1786. No.Copy !req
1787. You saved the pregnant woman.Copy !req
1788. You killed the henchman.Copy !req
1789. You saved your friend and
you stopped the villain.Copy !req
1790. And you did it all for free.Copy !req
1791. Oh God.Copy !req
1792. Nooooooo!Copy !req
1793. Freeze!Copy !req
1794. Is that, Dale?Copy !req
1795. Spaghettiman's getting away!Copy !req
1796. Yeah, I know.Copy !req
1797. Dale!Copy !req
1798. What're you doing here, buddy?Copy !req
1799. Hahaha, this must be
real embarrassing for you.Copy !req
1800. Hey, uh, you get a picture with him?Copy !req
1801. Yeah yeah.Copy !req
1802. Go ahead.Copy !req
1803. Yeah, get in there.Copy !req
1804. Put your hand out like this.Copy !req
1805. Okay, now make it good.Copy !req
1806. There you go, yeah.Copy !req
1807. Pose it.Copy !req
1808. Yeah, that's a good one.Copy !req
1809. One, two, three.Copy !req
1810. Hold it, yeah.Copy !req
1811. Got it?Copy !req
1812. That was a good one.Copy !req
1813. Do me, do me.Copy !req
1814. Is everything okay?Copy !req
1815. Paramedics say everything's fine.Copy !req
1816. Looks like Dale and his ninja gangCopy !req
1817. will be going away for awhile.Copy !req
1818. Cool.Copy !req
1819. That's cool.Copy !req
1820. What's wrong?Copy !req
1821. You stopped the bad guy and saved us.Copy !req
1822. Yeah.Copy !req
1823. Yeah I know.Copy !req
1824. For free too.Copy !req
1825. I know you probably
don't wanna hear this...Copy !req
1826. But you're a hero.Copy !req
1827. Gaaaaah.Copy !req
1828. You saved Kat.Copy !req
1829. For free.Copy !req
1830. And my children.Copy !req
1831. For free.Copy !req
1832. And you saved my life.Copy !req
1833. For free!Copy !req
1834. I know.Copy !req
1835. And for that, I'll always
be in your debt.Copy !req
1836. Wait.Copy !req
1837. Wait, your debt?Copy !req
1838. Like...Copy !req
1839. Like you owe me something?Copy !req
1840. Well, it's more like a figure of speech.Copy !req
1841. Like I owe you one, or...Copy !req
1842. Yeah. Yeah!Copy !req
1843. Like you owe me one.Copy !req
1844. Like you borrowed some money.Copy !req
1845. No. It's not literal.Copy !req
1846. It's like...Copy !req
1847. Yes!Copy !req
1848. Hey!Copy !req
1849. Where are you going?Copy !req
1850. I guess you're gonna have toCopy !req
1851. listen to that police scanner
to find out.Copy !req
1852. It's 11 miles home to my place.Copy !req
1853. I'll get a ride home with you.Copy !req