Smiley (2012)

1. I had to get your attention somehow.

2. It's not funny.

3. Who you texting anyway, your boyfriend?

4. Just work stuff.

5. Eww. Hey.

6. You know, someday, you're gonna have to get a job, too.

7. Nah. I'll just get married.

8. Hi.

9. Mare, come on. No chatting.

10. Say goodbye to your friend.

11. He's not my friend. I don't even know him.

12. Oh, no. Is this that site

13. Where it just chooses who you talk with?

14. Yeah, hideandgochat.

15. Yeah, you really shouldn't be on this site.

16. It's for people that do gross things to other people.

17. People do other things.

18. Yeah, like what?

19. I don't know.

20. Be silly.

21. Make friends all over the world.

22. You know, you can even meet a cute guy.

23. Heh. Really?

24. People use this to find dates?

25. Yeah, a lot of guys do it.

26. Hmm.

27. Some of them even do it with their pants off.

28. Okay, see, that's why you shouldn't be on this site.

29. It's way too sketch.

30. Totally.

31. I'm serious, though, mare. You really

32. Shouldn't put yourself out there like that.

33. What? Like someone's gonna go smiley on me.

34. Who?

35. You know, the urban legend,

36. Smiley.

37. No. Who's that?

38. You start a video chat with somebody

39. Who you don't even know,

40. And you type in "I did for the lulz" three times.

41. And then this guy with a knife appears behind them.

42. And what?

43. They die.

44. Why do they call him smiley?

45. Because he stitched his eyes shut

46. And carved a smile onto his face.

47. Okay.

48. You need to stop being creepy right now.

49. But it's fun!

50. That doesn't even make sense,

51. 'cause how can one person, smiley,

52. Just show up behind people all over the Internet?

53. You'd be surprised.

54. I think that's

55. Just— crazy!

56. What's crazy, daddy?

57. That you're still up. Go.

58. Go brush your teeth.

59. Go to bed, you, before I get you.

60. I'm sorry that I was late.

61. Um, would a check be okay?

62. Shush.

63. Hello?

64. Wow. It's big.

65. Yeah.

66. Sure you're gonna be okay here?

67. Mm-hmm.

68. You can still stay at the college

69. If you like. Dad.

70. Hmph.

71. Got everything you need?

72. I think so.

73. Need some money?

74. Dad, you give me plenty as it is.

75. I know, but I just want to make sure that you're okay.

76. I promise, I'm fine.

77. I know.

78. But if you need another year at home—

79. It won't be like last time.

80. I'm ready for this now.

81. Yeah, I know.

82. Look at you, all grown-up.

83. You're sure you don't want to be closer to your classes?

84. Daddy, campus is literally a block away.

85. You don't have to worry so much.

86. Well, I'm a father.

87. I—it's part of my job.

88. Daddy.

89. Hey.

90. We're both gonna be okay.

91. Okay?

92. Okay.

93. We got this.

94. I love you.

95. I love you back.

96. Get in there.

97. Text me if you need anything!

98. I think I'll just call.

99. Probably a good idea.

100. Proxy, this house is so nice.

101. Thanks for picking me. Hey.

102. Hey, I was just psyched to meet someone normal

103. When my roommate bailed.

104. You know, it's weird. There's so much online,

105. I kind of feel like I already know you.

106. It's just so cool that your parents

107. Bought this house for you.

108. Um, my parents bought it four years ago,

109. And they can't sell it, so might as well

110. Have your daughter live in it instead of paying dorm fees, I guess.

111. Yeah, I really didn't want to live in a dorm.

112. Yeah, they're small. They're gross.

113. Dorm parties suck. Speaking of which,

114. Um, I have a party to get to.

115. Well, it's actually kind of more of like a little get-together.

116. Hey, I mean, you wouldn't—

117. You wouldn't want to come with, would you?

118. Isn't it a school night?

119. Oh. Yeah, it's college.

120. I can do whatever I want.

121. Yes, I accept your invitation.

122. Lovely.

123. Is, like, everybody at this party?

124. Mm, probably. But, um,

125. It's not exactly a college party, though.

126. It's just across campus.

127. Oh. Is it some friends of yours?

128. Wait. Am I too dressed up?

129. No. No, no, no. Don't worry.

130. You're cool. I don't know all these people either, so...

131. You don't?

132. Did you hear about the party or something?

133. Wait. Do you think we can get in?

134. Is it safe? No!

135. Look, I know them, okay?

136. I just haven't met them in person.

137. This guy from "b" invited LA people

138. To his house for a meet-up.

139. What's bee?

140. You know, the "b" board on 4chan.

141. Is that like an Asian dating site?

142. What?

143. Oh, my God, that sounded totally racist.

144. Oh, my God. You rule.

145. Um, I might need to get stoned to explain this.

146. Do you smoke pot?

147. Oh, uh, I was kind of a dork in high school.

148. Oh, but you're in college now.

149. I can do whatever I want.

150. Yeah.

151. Oh, my God, pusher.

152. As I was saying, grandma,

153. "b" is an image board

154. Where people can communicate anonymously.

155. And what do people do anonymously?

156. Oh, very important things,

157. Like post gross, but hilarious pictures,

158. Plan raids, troll scientology,

159. Make memes, and in general

160. Do anything necessary for the lulz.

161. I think I'm high on your marijuana.

162. Give me my marijuana.

163. Ooh, I hope there's some hot guys at this party.

164. I like nerdy guys.

165. Obviously you like nerdy guys.

166. Wait. Jacket on or off?

167. Off. Ready?

168. Yeah.

169. You okay?

170. Hey, uh, what's up, superhot ladies?

171. What's up?

172. Heh heh. I'm guessing one of you is proxy?

173. Yeah? Yeah.

174. Yeah. What's up, Zane?

175. Zane, yeah.

176. Who's your smoking friend?

177. Hey. I'm Ashley.

178. Ashley. Nice.

179. Uh, I'm used to living alone, or else I'd suggest

180. A three's company kind of thing.

181. There's plenty of room,

182. Especially in my bedroom.

183. Yeah.

184. Whoa.

185. Cool.

186. Oh, so, uh,

187. You enjoy the strange?

188. Yeah, I enjoy the strange.

189. I just smoked pot.

190. Did that come out right?

191. Yeah, it did.

192. No, I enjoy the strange, because it's, uh,

193. Interesting and often retarded.

194. That's kind of my special research area,

195. The intersection of the strange and retarded.

196. That would make a really good soap opera,

197. The strange and the retarded.

198. "And these are the days of our strange and retarded lives."

199. No, but, uh, really, what I'm interested in

200. Is how people start believing in things, you know?

201. Like, uh, bigfoot, for example.

202. You know, there's no evidence that bigfoot exists,

203. Yet lots of people believe in bigfoot.

204. Chupacabra. Sure.

205. Sure. Or how 'bout God?

206. I mean, millions of people go to church,

207. And there's more evidence for chupacabra.

208. So is God strange or retarded?

209. Hmm.

210. Hmm.

211. Let's take acid and discuss.

212. But first I need another beer.

213. Uh, get drunk now, three-way later?

214. Sound good? Yeah.

215. What the?

216. Oh, hey.

217. Hey, I think I saw that guy on campus.

218. Oh. Should we say hi?

219. You should say hi.

220. Go. Go. I'll be fine. Go.

221. College party. Go. Okay.

222. Hey. I'm Ashley.

223. Hey.

224. Um, is this the anonymous party?

225. Nobody will say.

226. Oh. Well, then, I guess it is, right?

227. I'm just kidding.

228. Yeah, it's the anonymous party.

229. Yeah. I'm a dork.

230. Hey. Hey, what's up? I'm Zane.

231. What's up? I'm binder.

232. Yeah. What are you doing here, pedobear?

233. Don't call me that.

234. Okay? I thought it would be cool.

235. Mm.

236. You're pedobear?

237. Do you approve this message?

238. Bitch tits!

239. Pedobear!

240. Guys, come on.

241. I was just hanging out, okay?

242. Why don't you

243. Get out of here, pedobear?

244. No one wants to hang out with you.

245. What a fucking tool.

246. Bye, pedobear.

247. Yikes. What was that about?

248. Ah, he thought some of the stuff on the board was messed up,

249. Said he'd report it.

250. Honestly, some of the stuff is pretty messed up,

251. But, uh, it's not smart to say so.

252. He seemed nice.

253. Yeah, probably too nice.

254. Dude, it's the tits.

255. I did it for the lulz!

256. What are they saying?

257. Check it out.

258. What is this?

259. Hideandgochat.

260. It's video chat, like Skype,

261. But you don't know who you're chatting with.

262. Why would you chat with strangers?

263. Isn't that dumb?

264. Does this look dumb to you?

265. Really?

266. Really?

267. What was that?

268. What, you've never seen that?

269. "I did it for the lulz."

270. That's smiley. Who?

271. It's not real, though, right?

272. Well, nobody knows if it's real.

273. It's on the Internet.

274. It's like bloody Mary, okay?

275. It's an urban legend.

276. You type "I did it for the lulz" three times

277. Across from someone you're chatting with,

278. And then smiley creeps into frame,

279. And he kills them! Heh heh.

280. "I did it for the" what?

281. Lulz! Laughs. I did it just—

282. I did it just because. It's like—

283. Do you know when you do something just because you can

284. Or you're bored or whatever?

285. Anyway, don't worry. That video's totally fake.

286. Really? Yeah. Yeah.

287. 'Cause that's so freaky.

288. Raah!

289. You got me. Yeah, I did.

290. I did it for the lulz.

291. Oh, my God.

292. Oh, my God. Oh, my God.

293. This class is an introduction to reason and ethics.

294. Well, good morning. How are you?

295. Come on in, please.

296. Have a seat.

297. Make yourself comfortable.

298. I'm gonna stay here.

299. Great. As you guys know,

300. That this class is a requirement.

301. Now, aside from my brilliance and my charisma

302. And the, uh, school's obvious huge budget...

303. Do you have a pencil?

304. And some of the technical equipment...

305. Thanks.

306. Why do you think this class is—

307. You smell better than I do.

308. Excuse me. Excuse me.

309. What—what is your name?

310. Mark. Mark.

311. Okay, mark, could you please tell me

312. Why do you think this class is a requirement?

313. Um, because we have to take it?

314. Okay, all right, all right.

315. Hold on a second. Don't laugh at mark.

316. All right, now what is going on here?

317. Now, why can't, "because we have to take it,"

318. Be the reason that this class is a requirement? Why?

319. Yes, my sweet latecomer.

320. Because they're just different ways of saying the same thing.

321. Exactly.

322. They are what we will learn to call

323. Equivalent statements.

324. Neither supports nor follows the other.

325. Now, as you guys get more comfortable

326. With the keys of logic and reason,

327. You're gonna find that they'll open up just about any box.

328. Open your books to page, uh, 29.

329. 29. No, that's just—

330. That's just a picture of me.

331. Professor Clayton.

332. Oh, girl who was late.

333. I'm so sorry. Ashley Brooks.

334. I promise I will never—

335. No, just kidding. Half the people in this class

336. Are gonna drop out once they realize

337. That reading is involved.

338. Oh, well, I was wondering

339. Whether I could get all the semester's assignments early?

340. Why? You leaving town? No.

341. I just like to be really prepared.

342. Are you hitting on me?

343. What? No.

344. I wanted to know about—

345. You're joking.

346. Oh, no. No, that—

347. ah, yeah.

348. Nothing gets past you, Ms. Brooks.

349. Ah, you know what? All the assignments on the website.

350. All right. Okay. Okay. Thanks.

351. Do yourself a favor, though, okay?

352. You don't have to do all your homework in one night.

353. Just relax, okay? It's college.

354. Have a good time, okay?

355. Oh, what's up, party monster?

356. Everything is still spinning.

357. Is that normal?

358. I don't know what got into you.

359. Oh, God.

360. Did I do something crazy?

361. Uh, well, if belting out Taylor swift lyrics

362. At the top of your lungs in front

363. Of a bunch of 4chan nerds is crazy, then yes.

364. Oh, my God. That's so embarrassing.

365. No, don't worry, okay?

366. No one's even gonna remember that,

367. Because there's a new video.

368. What?

369. Are those juicy Booty shorts?

370. Oh, my God, his forehead.

371. That is from last night. What's that guy's name again?

372. I don't know. Is that a mole on your face,

373. Or is that a herpes?

374. I don't know. They put something

375. Right there on my face. I don't know.

376. What—what's it say?

377. Oh, my God.

378. There's no way, right?

379. No way it's real? Or no way it's fake?

380. I don't know.

381. Can't you call somebody?

382. None of us even know each other's real names,

383. But he hasn't been online, so...

384. What do other people think?

385. About half and half.

386. Well, did anyone call the police?

387. And say what? That there's some Internet video

388. Of some guy getting killed?

389. Yes. If this is real,

390. Oh, my God, this is so sick.

391. "Hi. Police?

392. "Yeah, there's an Internet video of some guy getting killed.

393. "Oh, no, sorry.

394. "I don't know his name,

395. "but, um, he plays pranks on the Internet,

396. "and there's this urban legend that says

397. "if you type 'I did it for the lulz'

398. "3 times in a chat, this guy smiley

399. Appears behind the other person and..."

400. Okay.

401. So it has to be fake.

402. Duh.

403. How would smiley know where you are?

404. Right?

405. Right. Yep.

406. I mean, they're all just waiting to see who falls for it.

407. We're way too smart for that.

408. Yeah, stupid trolls.

409. Heh. Oh, God, I'm so glad you came home.

410. That was kind of freaking me out.

411. Hey, you know, I know how we could find out for real.

412. What?

413. Try to do it?

414. No way. That's so spooky.

415. No, it's not. Okay, we just do it.

416. Nothing happens, and then we know it's fake.

417. Because that way,

418. We'll know it's fake for sure, huh?

419. Mm-hmm. Okay.

420. What are they called again?

421. Lulz, l-u-l-z,

422. Like lols, like lolcats, but lulz.

423. Mm. Ah, no.

424. Waah.

425. Mm...

426. Maybe.

427. Don't want to waste it. Keep going. Keep going.

428. Mm. Oh, he's kind of cute.

429. Mm, yeah, super cute. Total babe.

430. Don't kill him. Okay.

431. Enh, no.

432. Ahh! Penis!

433. Hi, tiny and kind of bent.

434. Hope you like touching that thing,

435. 'cause no one else is gonna do it.

436. "Next" him. Wait, wait.

437. Wait, maybe should we kill him instead.

438. Let me do it. Maybe smiley

439. Will come out and cut off his wiener.

440. "Wiener"?

441. Heh. I think you mean penis.

442. You can't joke around, though, okay?

443. You have to really want it to happen.

444. Yeah, okay, okay. I want it to happen.

445. Picture it. You have to picture it.

446. Okay.

447. Okay.

448. Give me the keyboard.

449. Right.

450. Yeah, right. As if.

451. He—he can see us!

452. "Next" him! "Next" him! "Next" him!

453. Oh, my God. What the fuck?

454. I don't know. Did we just kill somebody?

455. Did I just kill somebody?

456. I don't know. Where did he come from?

457. I don't know, okay? I don't know.

458. I thought college was gonna be fun.

459. If that really just happened, smiley can't know where we are.

460. But he saw us. I mean, he looked right at us.

461. He doesn't know where we are.

462. But he saw our faces, and, oh, my God,

463. He waved at us. And that doesn't matter.

464. He has no clue where we are.

465. He can't find out from the computer?

466. No, absolutely not, okay?

467. The hideandgochat servers are completely anonymized.

468. That's the whole point. They're set up

469. So not even your root can find the IP.

470. I don't know what that means.

471. Trust me. It's good.

472. Okay, okay.

473. So we report this, tell the police

474. What we saw. No, no, no, did. No, saw.

475. No. Why not?

476. Because if we report this, there's gonna be press.

477. If it's real, it's gonna lead him right to us.

478. He does know what we look like.

479. What about the FBI or something?

480. No. Ashley, we can't do that, okay?

481. We can't tell anybody about this.

482. This never happened.

483. Oh. It's my dad.

484. Not a word.

485. Hi, daddy.

486. Hi, sweetheart.

487. How's college life?

488. It's fine.

489. I mean, it's okay.

490. It's good.

491. I'm having fun.

492. Well, not too much fun, I hope.

493. No.

494. You sound a little funny, sweetheart.

495. Everything's fine.

496. I'm sorry I haven't called.

497. I just...

498. I was just watching a scary movie with proxy,

499. And I-I'm still trying to get it out of my head.

500. Everything's good.

501. Is this a bad time? I mean,

502. Do you want to get back to your movie?

503. No! I mean...

504. No.

505. Now's a good time. I'm out on the patio.

506. You still sound kind of funny, hon.

507. Must be a bad connection.

508. Okay.

509. But I do want you to know that if you just...

510. Feel like you're not ready to be out on your own,

511. You know, you can always come home.

512. Thanks, daddy.

513. I just miss mom.

514. Yeah.

515. Yeah, so do I, baby.

516. I wish we could just call her up, you know,

517. Hear her voice one more time.

518. Yeah.

519. Me, too.

520. It's just hard, you know.

521. But I promise I'm fine most of the time.

522. Ohh! Um...

523. Proxy's ready to keep watching,

524. So I'll call you later, okay? Bye.

525. I didn't tell. Good.

526. Now, who could tell me what we mean

527. By "the scientific method"?

528. Mark.

529. It's like you make a hypothesis...

530. No, that's true. Please, mark,

531. Stop—stop being right so often,

532. And give some of the other students a chance.

533. Yes, it's true.

534. The first step in the scientific method

535. Is forming a hypothesis.

536. So what's a hypothesis?

537. Maria.

538. It's like what you think is true.

539. Yes. Now that we have this notion

540. Of what we think is true, what do we do next?

541. I test it, girl.

542. Exactly.

543. You test it.

544. This man is a closet scientist.

545. All right, so what do we do now? Ashley.

546. Um, what if you test your hypothesis and it's wrong?

547. That's fine. Happens all the time.

548. You add that result to your observations.

549. You revise your hypothesis.

550. No. I mean...

551. What if you test your hypothesis

552. And something impossible happens?

553. Hmm. What do you mean, impossible?

554. Nothing. It's stupid.

555. I'm sure it's not.

556. Like supernatural?

557. Like ghosts?

558. I don't think we're gonna settle the ghost question,

559. But I want to talk about how the curiosity

560. And skepticism embodied in the scientific method

561. Have applications beyond the laboratory

562. And their opposite, ideology.

563. We can call ideology the complete confidence

564. In what we think we know, and as such,

565. It is the end of critical thinking

566. And not in a good way.

567. The worst things that happen in the world

568. Are done by people who are sure that they are right.

569. Hitler, Stalin, mao,

570. Pol pot, bin laden,

571. These are people who believe that they have some special knowledge

572. And that this gives them license to do anything

573. Because they can.

574. Now, provided any of you are still awake,

575. Would you please turn your books to the bottom of page 256?

576. Oh, I'm so sorry.

577. Uh, sorry.

578. Binder, right?

579. Yeah.

580. We met at that, uh, party last night.

581. Right.

582. Ashley.

583. I remember.

584. Can I talk to you about something?

585. Me?

586. Uh, yeah, sure.

587. Guess I'm the only one here.

588. What's up?

589. What do you know about smiley?

590. You mean, is he real?

591. Did they send you here to mess with me?

592. What?

593. Well, smiley's part of the reason they don't like me,

594. Like when I reported the child porn they posted on /b/.

595. I don't know. I just don't think

596. Stuff like that is ever funny.

597. Because it's not.

598. But what about smiley?

599. Well, my theories on him are kind of weird.

600. This whole thing is pretty weird.

601. Yeah.

602. Well, I think smiley's only real

603. When people make him real.

604. Like tinker bell?

605. Heh. Yeah.

606. Except it's like all the evil around the Internet

607. Found one place to hide,

608. You know, where it's invited,

609. And then people just made it become something.

610. Smiley.

611. Do you think he's real?

612. I don't know if smiley's real.

613. I mean, I think the videos are real.

614. That probably doesn't make any sense.

615. No, I think I know what you mean.

616. You seem really nice.

617. You do, too.

618. Maybe we could...

619. Be friends?

620. Yeah.

621. Yeah.

622. What's your number?

623. Uh, okay.

624. Oh.

625. That's you.

626. That's me. That's you.

627. Okay, I gotta go, but...

628. Text me, okay?

629. Really?

630. Yeah, really.

631. Bye. Bye.

632. See you later.

633. Hey.

634. Where are you going?

635. There's a big party night at Zane's.

636. It's gonna be huge, and you're coming.

637. What about what we did...

638. With smiley?

639. I don't know what you're talking about,

640. Because that never happened, remember?

641. Oh. Right. Sorry.

642. Yeah. Okay, go get ready, all right?

643. This'll make us both forget, I promise.

644. Okay.

645. Okay. Just don't dress

646. Like you're going to a quinceañera this time.

647. Whoo Whoo!

648. Hey, ash, I think—

649. Ohh! Ohh!

650. Shit. Oh, shit, I am so sorry.

651. Um, the bar here. Here. Try some.

652. Oh, I probably shouldn't.

653. Ah, come on. Drink it. It's a free drink.

654. Okay.

655. Drink it.

656. I gotta pee so badly.

657. Mm. I think there was a bug in it.

658. I'm gonna go pee in a closet.

659. You're crazy!

660. "... Did it for the lulz" three times,

661. And then smiley came up behind him, and he killed him.

662. Nuh-uh. That sounds crazy.

663. Are you sure it's real?

664. Oh. Hey, what's up?

665. Hey, I'm Ashley.

666. Yeah, yeah, I know.

667. We, uh—we met the other night.

668. You wanted to have sex with me,

669. But I wasn't into it.

670. What? Hmm?

671. I'm sorry about your friend.

672. Kells was your friend, right?

673. That's...

674. What? No.

675. He's not dead.

676. Are you kidding me?

677. He's probably just

678. Pulling a frigging prank on us. Hello.

679. They haven't even found the body.

680. Well, do you know where he lives?

681. I don't know.

682. Probably with his moms.

683. Oh, dude.

684. You just come up with that?

685. So you don't know if he's alive.

686. What if this is really real?

687. Oh, what if nothing's real?

688. Maybe it's the end of the Truman show

689. And you both just hit the sky mural.

690. "Oh, what's real? I don't know.

691. My life is a show on TV."

692. Come with me.

693. What did you see?

694. Nothing.

695. Seriously, what did you see?

696. I mean, I saw the video of kells.

697. Yeah, and he's fucking dead, right?

698. I mean, we're on the same page here.

699. What else did you see?

700. Nothing.

701. I didn't see anything else.

702. Are you fucking with me?

703. You typed it, and you made it happen.

704. No. Yes. You did.

705. You did it for the lulz, right?

706. You called smiley, and he came.

707. Okay, look, if it makes you feel any better...

708. I did it, too.

709. I don't even know who the fuck he killed.

710. It was just some kid.

711. He cut him up like a pig.

712. God, this can't be real, right?

713. It can't.

714. I mean, God,

715. I don't even know who these people are that are my friends,

716. Just people I know.

717. Whoa. Whoa, whoa, whoa.

718. Whoa. Hey, hey. I'm so sorry.

719. You—you want a bed or something?

720. I'm gonna go home.

721. Do you have a ride? You want a cab?

722. Or...

723. You can sleep over.

724. I'm gonna walk.

725. Eh, no, you shouldn't walk across campus by yourself.

726. What if he comes for the people who call him?

727. Have you thought about that?

728. Proxy.

729. It's nothing.

730. You're being stupid.

731. You're just being stupid.

732. Ashley.

733. No! Please, no!

734. Are you okay?

735. What?

736. That must have been one gnarly nightmare. What was it?

737. Smiley.

738. Smiley was trying to kill me.

739. That sucks. It's like Freddy Krueger.

740. What?

741. No! Last night,

742. He was really trying to kill me!

743. Dude, what happened to your shirt?

744. He—he chased me, and he caught me.

745. He ripped my shirt.

746. I don't think so.

747. Maybe I—

748. I left the party.

749. Um, yeah. I was looking all over for you.

750. And then this girl, she was like, "meh,

751. She's not in the reh,"

752. So I got a ride with them.

753. Look, this neighborhood isn't that bad, but you probably

754. Shouldn't be walking around by yourself at night.

755. Proxy! This actually happened!

756. I left the party, and I was pretty buzzed.

757. I was super wasted.

758. I mean, how did I get so wasted?

759. Mm, I don't know. And then—

760. And then I went across campus,

761. And he was there.

762. Well, are you sure it was him?

763. Wasn't just some creepy guy?

764. He had the fucking face,

765. And he had the knife,

766. And he said my name, proxy.

767. He knows my name.

768. But you got away.

769. No.

770. But, like, you're right here,

771. So, um, news flash, this didn't happen, Ashley.

772. Where did you find me? I found you right here.

773. I came in your room, and you were in your bed.

774. He was in here?

775. No. God.

776. It was just you.

777. He did this.

778. Okay.

779. I think that it was just a really bad dream.

780. I mean, don't get me wrong.

781. I'm really freaked out, too.

782. Okay, what's the last thing you remember?

783. Uh, he—

784. He was...

785. And I woke up.

786. Ashley, are you on any psychiatric meds?

787. No.

788. Not anymore.

789. Have you ever been on any medication?

790. Lithium for bipolar.

791. And when were you diagnosed?

792. My senior year of high school.

793. I kind of had a breakdown

794. After my mom committed suicide.

795. Had your mother been diagnosed as bipolar?

796. No. Well, I mean, afterwards.

797. And why'd you stop taking the meds?

798. The lithium made me so fat and stupid.

799. I couldn't remember anything.

800. But I—I didn't just quit. I came off it gradually.

801. Under your doctor's supervision?

802. Mm-hmm.

803. I've been totally off it for six months.

804. Okay. Well, what's up?

805. I'm really anxious.

806. It is your first week of college.

807. Yeah, but...

808. Really anxious,

809. Like terrified.

810. And I feel guilty.

811. I feel like I've done something really bad,

812. But I don't think I have.

813. Well, in your first week of school,

814. You haven't done something really awful,

815. Like, say, killed anyone.

816. Heh.

817. No.

818. But I'm having really vivid nightmares.

819. You've been through a trauma,

820. Adjusted to it,

821. And now you're in a new environment.

822. It's stressful.

823. I don't seem crazy?

824. Crazy?

825. I'd have to say...

826. Not at all.

827. Even though the dreams,

828. They're really...

829. They're really realistic.

830. Well, that's the nature of dreams, isn't it?

831. They seem real when we're having them.

832. Otherwise, they'd have no power over us.

833. But it sounds like this anxiety is debilitating.

834. Yeah. And you don't want

835. To go back on the lithium salts.

836. Have you ever tried anything for situational anxiety,

837. Rather than a sledgehammer like lithium?

838. Like what?

839. I'm gonna write you a short scrip for ativan.

840. That sound okay?

841. Hmm?

842. Yes.

843. I just remembered something.

844. I'm not crazy.

845. Okay, good.

846. That's a good thing to remember.

847. I'm gonna give you this scrip,

848. And it's not for crazy.

849. It's for anxiety.

850. Okay.

851. Did you tell?

852. No.

853. I just remembered. At the party,

854. Zane knew— yeah, he just called me.

855. There's another one. Another what?

856. Another dead person.

857. We gotta go to Zane's.

858. Ashley.

859. Okay, what is going on?

860. I don't know.

861. What about you?

862. Huh? You know what's going on?

863. Is that a gun? Yes. Yes.

864. This— this is a gun.

865. Why do you have that?

866. Because I am a security professional.

867. But I thought you went to college.

868. Do I really seem that retarded to you?

869. What? College is for retards.

870. I am a security professional.

871. Oh.

872. Like at the mall?

873. Fucking fuck, no! No, no, no!

874. Like at the mall? Network security.

875. What's network security?

876. He's a hacker, okay, like lulzsec,

877. Like—like anonymous, like wikileaks,

878. Like trolling westboro—

879. Proxy, will you shut up, please?

880. Will you watch the gun? Please shut up.

881. She has to understand that to know what you're talking about.

882. I don't know what you're talking about.

883. He needs some money,

884. He hacks a corporate network,

885. And then says, "hey, pay me to fix your problem."

886. That's a network security professional.

887. What you're talking about would be

888. An illegal protection racket.

889. I am one of a hundred

890. Or 500 or a thousand people in the whole world

891. Who can find out anything about anyone,

892. Medical records, how much money,

893. Chocolate or vanilla, top or bottom.

894. I mean, and honestly,

895. I have no idea what's going on.

896. I mean, who's doing this?

897. We don't know.

898. Okay, well, why don't you riddle me this?

899. Who is she?

900. Me?

901. Smiley's trying to kill me.

902. "Smiley's trying to kill me. Ahh."

903. You're not dead.

904. You're not dead,

905. And other people are.

906. You want to see the video

907. Of smiley slashing crash's throat?

908. I could show it to you if you want.

909. No. Proxy?

910. This shit's personal, okay?

911. If this isn't some Internet hobgoblin fairy tale,

912. This is one of our enemies.

913. Who are your enemies?

914. Who is not our enemies?

915. You don't get to be king of the Internet assholes

916. Without making a few enemies,

917. A shit-ton, in fact.

918. I mean, it could be—

919. Could be the— the Chinese

920. Or those fucking— those dicks in Holland.

921. Remember them? Yeah.

922. And, uh, the feds.

923. Could be the FBI.

924. I mean, but— but if it was the FBI,

925. You know, they'd be— just knock down the door.

926. Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck.

927. What if smiley isn't any of those things?

928. I mean, what if he's real?

929. He's definitely fucking real.

930. I think we've established that by now.

931. No, I mean, what if he's something we can't understand?

932. What if he's just evil?

933. And that evil...

934. Is hunting us?

935. Yes.

936. What if that evil is hunting us?

937. Well, then, I'd say that's pretty fucking bad news.

938. Shit!

939. I think I'm gonna go get my prescription filled.

940. Oh, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait.

941. What are you getting?

942. Oh, ativan.

943. Ativan. Um, save me some of that.

944. I think we're gonna need it.

945. All right, be careful, ladies.

946. Yeah. You, too.

947. Right.

948. All righty.

949. Who can tell me about occam's razor? Yeah?

950. Uh, "entities must not be multiplied beyond necessity."

951. You've done your reading. That's very good.

952. Okay, now give it to me in the plain language, okay?

953. What did William of ockham mean? Hmm?

954. Maria?

955. Uh, the most likely explanation

956. Is usually the right explanation.

957. Now, is occam's razor a rule

958. Or more of a guideline?

959. Well, it's a guideline, because, I mean,

960. Sometimes the unlikely explanation is actually the right explanation.

961. Right, and that brings us back to something

962. That, uh, Ashley...

963. Was asking about

964. At the end of the last class.

965. How do we account for things that seem so unlikely

966. As to be impossible?

967. They do occur.

968. Like supernatural?

969. Ah, let me give you something that's

970. A little weirder than what we call supernatural,

971. Just to, uh, blow your minds.

972. Are your minds ready to blown?

973. Okay.

974. Now, we know that the physical laws

975. That govern the universe are specific

976. And that the tiniest, most infinitesimal change

977. In the weight of just one type of subatomic particle,

978. Any kind of particle,

979. Would mean no universe,

980. No stars, no planets,

981. No life, no consciousness,

982. Us not even having this conversation.

983. Unless you believe in a God whose only reason for being

984. Is the authorship of a relatively small book of rules

985. About the weight and behavior of particles,

986. Then we have to acknowledge

987. That those rules could have been anything whatsoever.

988. Now, what is the implication of what I just said?

989. Yeah?

990. It's almost like everything that happened

991. Happened so we could know it happened.

992. A-plus.

993. And that idea is called the anthropic principle,

994. That everything happened just so that we could know it happened,

995. But there's a problem with the anthropic principle. Ashley...

996. What could be wrong with this idea?

997. It assumes we're the end.

998. Yes.

999. It assumes we're the reason,

1000. When really we could just be amoebas or whatever.

1001. Simple forms of life were necessary for us to develop.

1002. We might be what's necessary

1003. For something else to develop.

1004. And I think I'd like to end it on that.

1005. Humanity may be nothing more than an intermediate step

1006. In the development of a consciousness

1007. A trillion times greater.

1008. We already built it a network,

1009. Millions of nodes communicating with each other

1010. That is called the Internet.

1011. And while each node on its own

1012. Is nothing more than a dumb computer,

1013. Please remember that each of our individual brain cells

1014. Is capable of far, far less.

1015. Terminator, like skynet.

1016. Or like the matrix, like Neo.

1017. I think it's gonna be a lot stranger

1018. Than anything we're capable of imagining.

1019. Let's just hope that when it becomes conscious...

1020. It's nice to us.

1021. Or it could all just be a bunch of nonsense.

1022. All right, get out of here.

1023. Have a good day.

1024. Could I speak to you for a second?

1025. You know what? I'm kind of in a hurry.

1026. Yeah, but it'll just take one second.

1027. No, just come during office hours, okay?

1028. But— all right.

1029. Okay.

1030. Baby-sitter Stacy

1031. Hasn't been answering her calls.

1032. I'm really worried about her,

1033. Of her getting killed by smiley.

1034. And nobody believes me.

1035. Binder.

1036. Scared the crap out of me.

1037. Don't sneak up on people like that.

1038. Oh, sorry.

1039. What are you doing here?

1040. Oh, I, uh—

1041. I work here.

1042. Oh, in the library? Yeah.

1043. I manage the networking databases.

1044. It's how I pay for school.

1045. You're like a computer genius.

1046. Uh, yeah, thank you.

1047. I prefer the term nerd, but...

1048. What are you doing?

1049. You remember saying something about evil being a force.

1050. Yeah.

1051. Did you mean that literally?

1052. We're talking about smiley, right?

1053. Well, I've been researching it,

1054. And I haven't even had time to get to this part yet—

1055. Smiley's real.

1056. What? How do you know?

1057. I killed someone.

1058. Are you serious? Ah, that's amazing.

1059. I mean, that's terrible, obviously,

1060. But I tried to do it, and nothing happened.

1061. Do you want them to die?

1062. No. I mean, I wanted to be right,

1063. But I didn't want to kill anybody.

1064. You have to really want it.

1065. You have to really want them to die.

1066. But then he comes after you.

1067. He tried to kill me.

1068. What did it feel like?

1069. What do you mean? It was horrible.

1070. Wow. Do you know what this means?

1071. I mean, I thought I was crazy, but—

1072. But if this is true, if you're not lying,

1073. Then that means something's been awakened,

1074. Like something's been born,

1075. Like smiley could be the next generation—

1076. Are you not listening to me?

1077. Smiley's trying to kill me.

1078. You know...

1079. I thought maybe you could help.

1080. What are you doing? Huh?

1081. What the—are you trying to get us killed?

1082. I just— are you crazy?

1083. No, I just want it to stop.

1084. Well, then stop trying to find out

1085. What it is, okay? You're bringing it to us.

1086. But he won't leave me alone.

1087. I don't care! I don't care.

1088. You need to stop.

1089. Crazy bitch.

1090. Hi, sweetheart.

1091. Daddy?

1092. Proxy. What are you, crazy?

1093. No. No, I'm not crazy. I really didn't mean to. It was smiley.

1094. Shut up, Ashley.

1095. He was on the phone.

1096. I swear he was on the phone.

1097. I'm sorry.

1098. I'm sorry.

1099. I'm so sorry.

1100. I know I should have mentioned something before,

1101. And I know I lied. I'm just...

1102. I just don't want to be crazy like my mom.

1103. I'm really happy I can talk to you,

1104. Because I have nobody else.

1105. Do you think you're a danger to yourself?

1106. No.

1107. I don't want to die.

1108. I don't want anybody to die.

1109. I'm gonna need to see you again tomorrow.

1110. Between now and then, I want you to sleep.

1111. I can't sleep.

1112. Even the ativan won't make me.

1113. I'm gonna give you a serious tranquilizer.

1114. I'm only gonna prescribe one dose,

1115. And I don't want you to mix it with the ativan.

1116. Got it?

1117. You're presenting as rational,

1118. But what you're saying makes me very concerned.

1119. The good news

1120. Is that you know it doesn't make sense,

1121. And that's why you're here.

1122. Tomorrow, we're gonna talk about

1123. Checking you in for another evaluation.

1124. But I—I don't want to go for another—

1125. We talk about it tomorrow,

1126. Or we do it today. Your call.

1127. Okay.

1128. Then I'll see you tomorrow.

1129. Okay.

1130. Yeah.

1131. Ah, Ms. Brooks.

1132. You here to hand in

1133. Your next four months of assignments?

1134. No. I...

1135. come on.

1136. So what's up?

1137. I wanted to know— you were talking about in class the other day

1138. About computers being conscious.

1139. Do you think that's really possible?

1140. Yeah, sure. Yeah, why not?

1141. I—frankly, I think it's more likely

1142. That we'll all just kill each other

1143. Before something that interesting occurs, but yeah.

1144. You mean with nuclear weapons?

1145. Or bioweapons or nanomachines

1146. Or just plain old resource depletion

1147. Until we finally achieve total extinction of all complex life, yeah.

1148. But why would we want to do that?

1149. Want to do it?

1150. I don't think we want to do it

1151. Any more than a great white shark

1152. Wants to be an apex predator.

1153. It just does what it does.

1154. So you think that humans are just evil?

1155. Can you keep a secret?

1156. Yes.

1157. Okay.

1158. Hmm?

1159. No.

1160. Okay.

1161. What's the secret?

1162. I keep whiskey in the filing cabinet.

1163. Oh.

1164. Duh.

1165. You know, usually students come to my office,

1166. And they want to talk about grades,

1167. But evil is far more interesting,

1168. But I've gotta be honest with you, Ms. Brooks.

1169. I'm not sure exactly where this is going.

1170. Do you think evil really exists?

1171. Yeah. Of course I do.

1172. Who would deny it?

1173. Evil is a byproduct of humanity.

1174. You—you mean— I don't understand.

1175. Like pollution?

1176. Heh heh. Sure. Yeah, that's a—

1177. That's a good way to put it.

1178. Think about people, what they do.

1179. Eh, we're a perfect planetary suicide machine.

1180. All we have to do is drive,

1181. Consume, start a family.

1182. There's nothing more effective

1183. Than human reproduction

1184. If you want to accelerate planetary extinction.

1185. You don't even have to do anything spectacular

1186. To play a meaningful role in the grand human project of ending the world.

1187. And if you play your part better than others

1188. By inventing some new weapons system

1189. Or a more efficient way of extracting resource material,

1190. Just so you can suck everything out of the planet before we go—

1191. I don't know.

1192. Do you think that that is evil?

1193. It's just doing what we do.

1194. Isn't it?

1195. We're rats on a ship,

1196. Ants on an ice-cream cone.

1197. We're just going along for the ride.

1198. Everything's gonna end.

1199. I think the real question is

1200. Is it gonna end with a bang

1201. Or eliot's whimper?

1202. And, uh, in the meanwhile...

1203. It just doesn't matter.

1204. What is it that the kids say?

1205. Uh, it's the perfect expression of nihilism.

1206. Hmm?

1207. You know what I'm talking about.

1208. No?

1209. What is it?

1210. "I did it for the..."

1211. "I did it for the lulz"?

1212. Yeah. That's it.

1213. "I did it for the lulz."

1214. It's got a nice sound,

1215. Doesn't it?

1216. Lulz.

1217. Is that why you're here, Ashley?

1218. Do you want to do something for the lulz?

1219. I should go.

1220. Go. Stay.

1221. You know my point of view.

1222. I just don't care.

1223. Ashley.

1224. Ashley, I'm here.

1225. I'm inside your head.

1226. Over here.

1227. I'm not scared of you. Just shut up.

1228. Shut up. Just shut up.

1229. Fuck you. I'm not scared of you.

1230. Fuck you! Fuck you! Fuck you!

1231. Fuck—aah! Shut up!

1232. Aah!

1233. What the fuck are you looking at? Huh?

1234. Huh?

1235. No.

1236. Ashley.

1237. Mom?

1238. Oh, what's happening?

1239. Ow. I think you broke my nose.

1240. Am I dreaming?

1241. Uh, does it look like you're dreaming?

1242. No.

1243. This seems pretty real.

1244. That's 'cause it is.

1245. My nose is broken in a pretty real way.

1246. Gotta go get a towel.

1247. Sorry about your nose

1248. And being just insane.

1249. That's okay.

1250. And I'm sorry that I yelled.

1251. You're not insane.

1252. I know you're just scared.

1253. Oh. Zane and I, we had sex,

1254. And then he split right before you started screaming.

1255. I seriously can't take this anymore.

1256. I mean, is this real, or am I just going crazy?

1257. I think both, dude.

1258. Who are you calling?

1259. It's 4:00 in the morning.

1260. They're open.

1261. 911 emergency.

1262. Hi. I'd like to report a murder.

1263. Could I have some more coffee?

1264. Sure.

1265. You want me to make this run?

1266. Ah, I got it. I need another cup, too.

1267. All right, let's go over this again.

1268. Okay.

1269. Now, you called in to report a murder,

1270. Maybe two, you don't know.

1271. I do know.

1272. Definitely several murders.

1273. I witnessed at least two.

1274. On video.

1275. And you say that both of these murder—

1276. Well, all these murders were performed

1277. By the same guy, the same person,

1278. This, uh, smiley.

1279. Okay. Well, just so—

1280. Just so we get this straight...

1281. Smiley appears behind people

1282. In an anonymous video chat,

1283. Like from out of cyberspace or something,

1284. When the other person types in, uh,

1285. "I did it for the lulz. I did it for the lulz. I did it for the lulz."

1286. Yes. I told you, I know it sounds crazy.

1287. But, I mean, it happened.

1288. Hmm. Yeah.

1289. And he—he chased me across campus,

1290. And then he tried to kill me.

1291. And then you woke up.

1292. But I must have blacked out.

1293. Maybe he did something to me.

1294. I'm gonna tell you the part

1295. I'm having a hard time with.

1296. All of it.

1297. But...

1298. Look, look, look. Listen. Listen.

1299. Just hear me out. This is what it looks like

1300. From my perspective as a police detective.

1301. First of all, you have no victim.

1302. But we do have victims.

1303. But there are no bodies.

1304. You say you saw dead people,

1305. But you don't know who they are,

1306. Except for some nicknames that, uh, nobody can trace.

1307. It is very difficult to investigate a crime

1308. When it's not very clear that any crime has been done.

1309. You haven't found a single body?

1310. We find bodies all the time.

1311. We just haven't found one that fit the description that you gave.

1312. And nobody's called in about smiley?

1313. No, we've had a few calls about this smiley character,

1314. But yours is the first one that we've taken

1315. Seriously enough to have this talk.

1316. Now, you look like a nice girl

1317. That nobody would want to hurt,

1318. So I gotta ask you.

1319. Are you on the wrong end of some kind of prank?

1320. You been punk'd?

1321. No!

1322. Why won't you believe me?

1323. Look, I'll show you everything I'm talking about.

1324. You're welcome.

1325. Let me show you something first.

1326. Coop.

1327. How did you get that?

1328. How did we get it?

1329. I think pretty much everybody got it.

1330. Over 5 million views since yesterday.

1331. Maybe he took it. Maybe he took it.

1332. We have to take allegations like the one you called in seriously,

1333. So we're not gonna press charges against you for wasting our time.

1334. If you believe everything

1335. That you told us tonight,

1336. Please, please,

1337. You need to see a psychiatrist.

1338. I am seeing a psychiatrist.

1339. I am.

1340. Well, that's too bad.

1341. Uhh! This is bullshit!

1342. Well, at least my nose isn't broken. I guess that's good news.

1343. Proxy, they didn't believe any of it.

1344. How can everything just be gone?

1345. I don't know.

1346. Okay, we did the same thing

1347. In my interview room, and I just— I don't know.

1348. It's just weird. He—it—okay, whatever smiley is,

1349. He's just playing with us.

1350. But how can you erase everything over the whole Internet?

1351. You can't.

1352. Not if you're human.

1353. I promise I'm feeling better.

1354. And it's not like I'm saying yesterday I was crazy

1355. And today I'm not.

1356. I still believe everything I said,

1357. But it was just really weird at the police station.

1358. And?

1359. Look, I'm not there yet,

1360. But maybe I've been having trouble

1361. With what's real and what's not.

1362. Good.

1363. Is it bad?

1364. Acknowledging it is good.

1365. That's a scary thing to do,

1366. Admit that your perceptions are in conflict with objective reality,

1367. And it's the first step to bringing them in line with each other.

1368. Are you sure?

1369. Trust me. This is good.

1370. Thanks so much for doing this.

1371. Hey, being a total nerd is good for something, right?

1372. You're not a nerd.

1373. And it's so awesome that you gave me your old computer.

1374. Ah, well, that's what friends do.

1375. You didn't have to do that.

1376. I know, but I wanted to.

1377. So not to be any nerdier than usual,

1378. But this computer is fully equipped, okay?

1379. It has your own firewall, 128-bit encryption

1380. And a 256-bit key.

1381. I don't know what you just said,

1382. But sounds good.

1383. Okay, this is the dungeon.

1384. I am the dungeon master.

1385. This is the dungeon master's key.

1386. Why, thank you, dungeon master.

1387. You're welcome, princess.

1388. Unfortunately the dungeon master

1389. Never gets the princess.

1390. Sometimes they do.

1391. Whoa!

1392. Ohh!

1393. Heh. You crazy kids.

1394. Hi.

1395. So you're sure you're cool with me

1396. Going to my parents' for the weekend?

1397. I just—I really gotta clear my head.

1398. Yeah, totally.

1399. Oh. Okay, well, uh, I should probably go,

1400. So see you later?

1401. Bye, dungeon master.

1402. Dungeon master?

1403. That's kinky.

1404. Not like that.

1405. The nerd kind of dungeon master.

1406. Yeah.

1407. He's sweet.

1408. Whatever. No judging here.

1409. There are handcuffs in my underwear drawer if you need 'em.

1410. If you need me, call me.

1411. Otherwise, I don't know. We could just,

1412. Like, video chat the whole time.

1413. Okay.

1414. You'll be fine.

1415. I know. I'll talk to you?

1416. Text me. Okay.

1417. Okay. Have a good weekend.

1418. Yeah, have fun.

1419. So much fun. Bye.

1420. Heh. Yes, really, daddy, I'm fine.

1421. Okay, sweetheart.

1422. You know you can always call me if you need me, right?

1423. Yes, I know.

1424. I love you.

1425. I love you back. Heh.

1426. Oh, my God. Thank God you're there.

1427. Hey, what's up? Are you okay?

1428. I can't find Zane.

1429. Zane? Yeah.

1430. Um, we were gonna do stuff on video chat.

1431. It's the only thing he's never late for.

1432. What? What, you think he's hooking up with some other slut?

1433. Mm, or...

1434. Oh, my God.

1435. Smiley?

1436. I'm gonna call the cops.

1437. No. I'll go.

1438. No, you can't go by yourself.

1439. Binder will come with me.

1440. Uh, okay, fine, fine.

1441. Okay, fine. Yeah, I guess if he goes with you.

1442. Okay, stay online. I'll make sure everything's okay.

1443. Be careful!

1444. Yeah. Bye.

1445. Hey, you've reached binder's voice mail.

1446. Leave me a message.

1447. Hey, binder. It's Ashley.

1448. Could you give me a call when you get this?

1449. Proxy just called me, and Zane's not, um—

1450. Just call me when you get this, okay?

1451. Zane!

1452. Hello?

1453. Are you here?

1454. Hello?

1455. Zane?

1456. Ashley.

1457. Ashley.

1458. Ashley. Ashley.

1459. Ashley. Ashley. No!

1460. Ashley. Ashley.

1461. This is diamond.

1462. You have to help me.

1463. Zane's dead.

1464. I'm sorry. Who is this?

1465. Ashley. Ashley Brooks.

1466. I called you about the serial killer.

1467. Ah, Ms. Brooks. Heh heh.

1468. Is this another one of your friends from cyberspace?

1469. Yes.

1470. He's dead. I saw the body in person.

1471. Ms. Brooks.

1472. Hello?

1473. She dropped the call.

1474. I'm sure she'll call back.

1475. Wha—did you just hang up on me?

1476. Fucking crackpots.

1477. What the fuck?

1478. Ashley? Proxy!

1479. Ashley. Ashley, what's going on?

1480. Zane's dead. Oh, my God.

1481. Smiley cut off his face. Oh, my God, Ashley.

1482. There's blood everywhere.

1483. Call the police. Call 911. 911.

1484. No.

1485. No?

1486. This has to stop now.

1487. Oh, my God. No, no, no.

1488. Ashley, no.

1489. Do it.

1490. No. You can't.

1491. Come on. Do it before I change my mind.

1492. Fuck.

1493. Are you sure?

1494. You have to mean it, proxy.

1495. You have to picture him killing me.

1496. Oh, my God. Binder.

1497. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. I'm so sorry.

1498. I'm so sorry. I really didn't mean to do this to you.

1499. It was an accident. I promise.

1500. It was an accident.

1501. You're gonna be fine.

1502. You're gonna be fine, okay. Just breathe.

1503. What the...

1504. What brings people to do the things they do?

1505. Reason and ethics can explain some of man's motives,

1506. But only some.

1507. We all have the capacity to commit the most...

1508. Vicious of acts, the cruelest of atrocities,

1509. To do something simply because we can.

1510. But what prevents us from doing the unthinkable?

1511. From crossing over from the light and into the dark?

1512. Every community lives by a moral code,

1513. And when that code is broken,

1514. We're led to believe that a force has been unleashed onto the universe...

1515. A score needed to be settled...

1516. A bounty to be collected.

1517. Of course, we can never know for sure

1518. The consequences of our actions.

1519. But one thing we know for sure

1520. Is that our actions will have consequences.

1521. And in the struggle between good and evil...

1522. We'll never know who has the last laugh.

1523. Oh, my God. Holy shit.

1524. Ohh.

1525. Boys, we fucking did it.

1526. Dude, that bitch went fucking splat.

1527. Yeah, I gotta instagram that.

1528. Guys, what happened?

1529. We didn't even get to come out.

1530. Our noob fell

1531. And broke her neck.

1532. She's dead.

1533. Oh, my God.

1534. That's awesome.

1535. Oh, shit.

1536. We have to get out of here.

1537. Oh, relax. We're fine.

1538. Oh, my God! Ashley!

1539. Ashley! What's going on?

1540. Oh, my God. Shut up, you whore.

1541. It's over.

1542. What do you mean it's over?

1543. She fell on her head, and now she's dead.

1544. Oh. That rhymed.

1545. Oh, my God.

1546. That's fantastic!

1547. Hey, uh, Daniel day-Lewis,

1548. Your girlfriend just landed a triple lindy on her brain.

1549. What up?

1550. Ah, and I didn't even get to fuck her?

1551. Ah, well, she's not going anywhere.

1552. You're right. Hmm.

1553. Oh, and, uh, by the way, good call on the double kill.

1554. I really thought I cut you up there for a sec.

1555. Ah, well, you know, a little latex

1556. And corn syrup goes a long way.

1557. Wait. Did Ashley do it on purpose,

1558. Or it was an accident?

1559. It was an accident,

1560. But we're still calling it a win for anonymous.

1561. Whoo! Uh, not sure

1562. Our hacktivist branch will condone this.

1563. Okay, you know what?

1564. Fuck those guys.

1565. They don't get to say who's anonymous and who's not.

1566. The troll army?

1567. They don't have any command or control.

1568. I mean, they say we're off message?

1569. No, fuck them. They're off message.

1570. Because, I mean, there's only one reason to troll.

1571. For the lulz.

1572. For the lulz! For the lulz!

1573. Amen, brother.

1574. Well, now that she's dead,

1575. I guess smiley's dead, too, right?

1576. Heh. God, you know what, kells?

1577. I'm really glad we killed you off early,

1578. 'cause I feel like you just don't get it.

1579. You see, smiley's not dead.

1580. Smiley is immortal.

1581. Smiley'll be around longer than any of us.

1582. You know, he's like the pyramids

1583. Or the great work of William Shakespeare.

1584. He's chocolate rain.

1585. And these masks,

1586. They're in boxes all over campus

1587. And about 20 other campuses.

1588. It's only a matter of time before the copycats start rolling in.

1589. Smiley can be anyone

1590. Anywhere at any time.

1591. The first viral serial killer.

1592. Oh, God, something tells me

1593. Smiley's gonna be really popular this Halloween.

1594. Ah, it's gonna be historic.

1595. People are gonna be speaking our names for generations.

1596. Except they don't actually know our names, right?

1597. You know what?

1598. That part's actually really important.

1599. We should probably get our shit

1600. And get the fuck out of here.

1601. I kind of have a boner.

1602. Is that weird?

1603. Look, Zane, um, is she really dead?

1604. Uh, yeah.

1605. She's really, really, really dead.

1606. Are we bad people?

1607. Yeah.

1608. Why did we do this? Seriously?

1609. Oh, well, I don't know why you did it,

1610. But I know why I did it.

1611. That's not funny, Zane.

1612. We really killed her.

1613. Oh, come on. She killed herself.

1614. Yeah.

1615. Proxy!

1616. Holy shit.