1. GloboTech Industries, long recognized as
the worldwide leader in high-tech weaponry...
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2. is now reaching even higher.
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3. Under the leadership of CEO,
Gil Mars...
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4. GloboTech engineers are blazing the trail
into tomorrow's most exciting sector.
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5. Introducing advanced
battlefield technology...
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6. into consumer products
for the whole family.
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7. For the first time, you and yours will enjoy
the same high quality standards...
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8. as demanded by the Defense Department,
at private sector prices.
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9. GloboTech, turning swords into plowshares
for you and your family.
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10. He's here. He's early.
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11. He's not supposed to be here yet.
He said...
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12. Slamfist optimal.
Good. Check.
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13. Chickens...
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14. - Hey.
- Hey. Let me help you with these.
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15. Pretty exciting, huh?
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16. I don't know.
I think it's kind of sad.
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17. Heartland Toys has a long tradition
of bringing joy to kids.
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18. Gil Mars won't care about that.
He's just going to care about profits.
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19. I think it sucks.
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20. Welcome to Earth. You may not be
familiar with our customs...
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21. but things work like this down here,
in the real world.
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22. - Well, the real world sucks.
- It does have its perks.
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23. Gentlemen, I'm Ms. Kegel,
executive assistant to Mr. Mars.
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24. Hi. Let me be the first to welcome you
to the GloboTech family.
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25. Just as he's clone with his computer,
telecommunications and food divisions...
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26. Mr. Mars intends to bring his own
personal touch to Heartland Play Systems.
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27. Well, that's good.
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28. Alright.
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29. These are...
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30. - Where's everybody else?
- There is no longer any "everybody else".
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31. Mr. Mars, it's an honor...
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32. Cut the kiss-ass, pal.
After I leave, I won't remember your name.
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33. - This is Irwin Wayfair.
- Great.
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34. I'm told you two
are responsible for this.
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35. Yes, sir. That's Flatchoo,
he's part of the Belch Brigade.
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36. Actually, the whole line
was Irwin's idea.
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37. Once I did the marketing, it was the most
successful product in company history.
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38. That's why I bought the place
and why you two are still on board.
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39. So, let's talk about the future.
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40. Okay, these are Gorgonites. They...
Hi. How are you today?
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41. I'm late.
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42. Okay.
I drew up some pictures.
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43. That's a picture you can have.
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44. Alright, these are Gorgonites.
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45. And this one... This is Archer.
He's the grand, noble leader of...
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46. Okay, and Troglokhan...
the navigator who navigates.
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47. Okay, they're monsters
from the land of Gorgon.
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48. They've come to our world
and are lost.
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49. To return to Gorgon,
they have to learn all about our world.
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50. This way, kids can learn
and do research...
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51. - Excuse me. Did you say "learn"?
- Learn... Learn, yeah.
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52. Next.
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53. Mr. Mars,
let me introduce you to...
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54. Major...
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55. Chip Hazard,
leader of the Commando Elite.
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56. It's called multimedia, Irwin.
Look into it.
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57. The future is here.
A new age has dawned...
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58. for act/on!
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59. The wor/dt most awesome
high-tech fighting force...
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60. is ready to battle for
the next millennium.
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61. - Ch/p Hazaraj reporting for duty!
- Wait, wait, wait. Hold on. Hold on.
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62. Wait. Hold on.
Can they really do that?
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63. - Do what?
- Punch out of the box.
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64. - No.
- I didn't think so.
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65. There's a disclaimer.
Legal says we're completely covered.
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66. You know what I'm sick of?
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67. Commercials showing trucks
popping up on Mount Rushmore...
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68. and parking on
Abraham Lincoln's head. Okay?
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69. Ancl shampoo commercials that say
women can look like Claudia Schiffer...
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70. after one cycle
of rinse and repeat.
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71. What if these toys
actually could talk?
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72. What if they could walk?
What if they could actually kick ass?
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73. Nick N/tro!
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74. I'm talking about toys that are so smart,
when kids play with them, they play back.
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75. Toys that actually do what they do
in the commercials.
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76. That's an interesting idea.
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77. Forget the
"Batteries not included" crap.
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78. Put in a lifetime
GloboTech lithium cell.
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79. They'll run forever.
That'll piss off the guys at Eveready.
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80. Yeah...!
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81. How's this slogan? "The Commando Elite.
Anything else is just a toy."
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82. - "Everything else is just a toy."
- That's good, too. Sure.
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83. Sir...?
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84. You know, that kind of computing power
doesn't really seem feasible...
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85. Irwin, we're part of GloboTech.
We can find the technology.
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86. Our missiles can find a bastard 7,000 miles away
and stick a warhead up his ass.
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87. This won't be a problem. They're soldiers.
What do soldiers need?
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88. - Hats?
- Camouflage?
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89. - Ms. Kegel?
- Enemies, sir.
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90. Enemies. See, these hideous,
ugly freaks are the enemy...
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91. and our guys have to find them
and vaporize them.
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92. No, they're not...
Sir?
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93. Don't you think
that's a bit violent?
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94. Exactly.
So call it action, not violence.
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95. Kids love action.
It sells.
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96. Besides, what are you worried about?
They're only toys.
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97. I can't believe this.
This is really wrong.
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98. It's a total perversion of everything
I designed these Gorgonites to be!
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99. Can it, Irwin.
This is a golden opportunity.
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100. If we pull this off,
Mars will be eating out of our hands.
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101. By the way, gentlemen, Mr. Mars expects
the product ready for shipment in three months.
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102. Three months?
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103. No. It takes at least
six months.
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104. There's product testing
and focus...
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105. Three months is fine.
Tell Mr. Mars they'll be ready then.
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106. Alright, then.
These are your security cards.
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107. They give you unlimited access
to all top-secret Globo technology.
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108. And these are your individual,
secret passwords.
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109. Memorize them now.
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110. - Mine's "Gizmo."
- I said "secret."
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111. But...
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112. Password. Password.
What's my password?
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113. Pass...
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114. Gizmo!
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115. Let's find us some chips.
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116. Some really good chips.
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117. A lot of really good chips.
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118. The X1000.
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119. Hello, Mr. Chips.
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120. This looks like a nice store.
Look at those toys.
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121. Come on, Grandma.
This place never has anything good.
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122. Hey Alan.
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123. How's the world treating you?
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124. - You, Joe, are the highlight of my clay.
- Jeez, tough break, kid.
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125. - New truck?
- New owner. See?
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126. Soon everything will be owned
by one giant corporation.
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127. Then, it's good-bye
microbreweries.
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128. So, where's your clad?
I got his order.
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129. He's going out of town tonight
for a seminar.
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130. Wait a second.
He left you in charge?
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131. Hey, I was as surprised as you.
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132. I think he's starting to trust me again.
Or maybe he didn't have a choice.
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133. What's the seminar?
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134. "How to make a success
of your small business."
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135. - I suggested torching the place.
- Not a good idea.
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136. Arson forensics nowadays
are very sophisticated.
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137. "Gorgonites and Commando Elite."
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138. What are those?
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139. Let's find out.
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140. Ten-hut!
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141. Major Chip Hazard,
reporting for duty, sir!
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142. Wow. Voice activated.
Not bad.
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143. They move, they talk.
They got a built-in, two-way radio.
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144. "Buy a second commando
and communicate with a friend."
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145. Halt! Who goes there?
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146. Greetings. I am Archer,
emissary of the Gorgonites.
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147. Awfully polite for a monster.
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148. You never have to replace the battery.
That's a good thing.
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149. Hey, Joe. Do you think you could
front me a set of these?
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150. - What?
- Sort of lend them to me.
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151. - You got plenty in the truck.
- Yeah...
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152. That's Toy World's inventory
for the month.
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153. This order's paid for.
I don't wanna get my ticket pulled.
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154. I'll pay you back
after I sell them.
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155. What about your dad's policy,
no war toys?
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156. Don't worry about my clad.
By the time he gets back, they'll be sold.
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157. Ancl we'll have made some money
for once.
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158. - I don't know.
- What?
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159. You're saying that never in your career
has anything just fallen off.
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160. - I don't like your tone.
- Sorry.
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161. It's too loud.
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162. Okay, one whole set.
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163. I'll lose the paperwork
someplace.
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164. - I had better not regret this.
- You won't. I swear.
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165. And you've got to get them
off the truck.
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166. I hope you know, what you're doing.
I could get in trouble for this.
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167. - No one will know.
- They better not.
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168. These toys don't go on sale officially
until Monday.
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169. I could loose my job.
I could loose my house.
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170. And my wife!
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171. - Thanks, Joe. I owe you one.
- You owe me twelve!
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172. Good luck, kid.
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173. Freeze!
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174. - I wanted to go to Toy World.
- Life is full of disappointments.
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175. Go look around.
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176. His birthday's next week.
Mom said I had to take him shopping.
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177. Great.
What kind of stuff is he into?
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178. Dinosaurs, mutant freaks.
Anything that maims, kills or destroys.
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179. I just got in...
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180. You're Alan Abernathy.
You moved into the house behind mine.
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181. I've heard about you.
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182. - You have?
- Yeah.
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183. How come I never see you
after school?
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184. Well, I'm kind of stuck here.
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185. What kind of toy store is this?
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186. It's my clad.
He thinks these toys are cool.
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187. Too bad nobody else does.
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188. The Commando Elite will rid the Earth
of the Gorgonites.
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189. The Gorgonites are peaceful.
We mean no harm.
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190. Gorgonite, you are a hideous freak.
You will be vaporized.
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191. Civilian, declare your allegiance.
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192. Hey, cool!
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193. I know what I want!
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194. I want the soldier! They're walking
and fighting and they're so cool!
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195. Where'd they go?
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196. What about this one?
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197. No, I want the other one.
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198. Major Chip Hazard.
He's the one.
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199. - How much are these?
- A lot.
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200. Mom and Dad
won't buy you one of these.
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201. Yes, they will.
They buy you those stupid Gwendy dolls.
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202. Alright, Timmy.
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203. Save me one of the buff guys.
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204. - Ancl a monster, too.
- I don't think so, brat.
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205. - I'll find it and hold it till tomorrow.
- How about the flame-thrower?
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206. - When will I get that toy?
- Never, if you don't shut up.
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207. - Bye.
- Bye.
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208. Say "hi" once in a while.
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209. - Meet death with honor, coward.
- There you are.
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210. Congratulations.
You're practically sold.
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211. You, I'm not so sure about.
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212. Troglokhan.
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213. Punch-It.
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214. Oh, man! Dad's ticket!
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215. Okay, suitcase...
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216. briefcase, keys. Keys.
Where are my keys?
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217. - Right where you left them.
- Ancl where did I leave them?
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218. What is wrong with me?
What else?
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219. - Stuart, please, try to relax.
- Yeah...
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220. Remember why we moved here.
To get away from the stress.
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221. To eliminate the stress.
To...
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222. - exhale... the stress.
- Exhale... the stress.
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223. Mom! I know what I want for my birthday.
I want a Major Chip Hazard.
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224. - Don't upset your father.
- Hi, Dad.
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225. - Hi, sweetie.
- What's up?
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226. - Al here was just telling me...
- Ed.
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227. He was just telling me the angle
of the Earth's tilt on its axis...
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228. relative to the orbit
of the transmission satellite...
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229. restricts the placement
for optimum reception.
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230. Um, yeah.
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231. In other words,
this tree is in the way.
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232. Rig ht. Exactly.
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233. No problemo.
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234. Hey! Knock that off!
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235. Hey Stuart, dish guy says the tree has to go.
You don't mind, do you?
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236. - Yes, I mind!
- What?
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237. I said, "yes, I mind!" What the hell
are you doing, Phil? This is my tree!
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238. Happy to do the work. What are neighbors for?
Isn't the dish a beauty?
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239. No, no, no.
This tree is beautiful.
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240. That dish is just one more piece
of techno-crap...
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241. to go along with the rest
of your stockpile of techno-crap!
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242. You're already pulling so much juice,
you got us living in a cancer node.
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243. - There's never been any conclusive data...
- Give me that saw, Phil. Come on.
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244. Stuart, come on.
Airplane now, vendetta later.
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245. I'll check the zoning laws,
but I think they'll prove me right.
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246. Hasn't he heard of the dishes
that go on top of your house?
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247. - Maybe they don't get as many channels.
- He probably got a deal.
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248. Dad!
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249. Alan, what are you doing here?
You're supposed to be in the shop.
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250. - You forgot your ticket.
- Oh, my ticket.
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251. Thank you, son.
Way to stay heads up.
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252. - Occasionally I do something right.
- Right. I'm out of here.
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253. - Hurry but drive carefully.
- Okay. I'll call you when I get there.
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254. Hey, give me a smooch.
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255. - Bye-bye. Bye, son.
- See you later, Dad.
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256. - Bye-bye!
- Bye-bye!
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257. Bye!
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258. - Did you empty the cash register?
- Yes.
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259. - Did you empty the cash register?
- Both quarters and all 6 pennies.
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260. - Ancl yes, I shut off the lights.
- Just asking.
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261. It's possible I make it through
the entire clay without screwing up.
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262. What the..
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263. How the heck
did you get in here?
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264. What was it?
Halt! Who goes there?
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265. Greetings. I am Archer,
emissary of the Gorgonites.
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266. Sure you are.
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267. - Beware. There will be no mercy.
- Is that so?
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268. Beware.
There will be no mercy.
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269. I'll be real careful.
Thanks for the advice.
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270. Greetings. I am Archer,
emissary of the Gorgonites.
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271. - What is your name?
- I'm Alan. Now shut up.
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272. I have to do my homework.
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273. Greetings, Alan-now-shut-up.
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274. What did you say?
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275. You just said my name,
didn't you?
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276. Didn't you?
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277. NO...
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278. Commandos! Ten-hut!
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279. Commando Elite, fall in!
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280. Sound off, soldiers!
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281. Butch Meathook, sniper.
Lethal from any distance, sir!
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282. Good to have you aboard.
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283. Nick Nitro.
Demolition is my mission.
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284. I served with your father.
He was a good man.
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285. Brick Bazooka, artillery.
Ready to go full bore, sir!
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286. - Save it for the enemy.
- Link Static, communications. Awaiting orders, sir!
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287. Double up on your rations,
Sparky.
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288. Kip Killagin, covert insurgent.
Sharp as a razor, sir!
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289. Let me see that weapon.
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290. Standard issue
is insufficient.
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291. Alright, ladies,
now listen good.
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292. Our mission: Destroy the Gorgonite enemy.
Defeat him!
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293. Yes, sir!
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294. There will be no mercy.
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295. Search the area
and secure new arms.
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296. Commandos, fall out!
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297. Gorgon.
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298. Hey!
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299. What the heck are you?
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300. You're not like any toy
I've ever seen.
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301. Come on, speak up.
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302. Greetings, Alan-now-shut-up.
I am Archer, emissary of the Gorgonites.
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303. I think you're smarter
than you're letting on.
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304. I bet you're smart enough to get my name right.
It's Alan. Just Alan. Got it?
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305. Greetings, Alan.
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306. I knew it.
Walk to the end of the table.
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307. Don't play dumb with me.
You know what I'm saying.
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308. Alan, friend of Archer...
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309. defender of all Gorgonites,
keeper of Encarta.
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310. Keeper of Encarta?
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311. You were using my computer?
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312. If I find a virus in there,
you're headed for the microwave.
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313. Beware.
There will be no mercy.
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314. Are you threatening me?
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315. The Gorgonites must be free.
There will be no mercy.
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316. Soldiers, no poor sap ever won a war
by dying for his country.
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317. He won it
by being all that he can be.
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318. Damn the torpedoes
or give me death!
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319. Eternal vigilance
is the price of duty.
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320. Ancl to the victors go the spoils.
So, remember:
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321. You are the best of the best
of the few and the proud!
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322. So, ask not what your country can do for you,
only regret that you have but one life to live.
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323. The war against the Gorgonites
will be won!
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324. Commando Elite,
let the first shot be fired!
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325. Search out the Gorgonites
and frag them all!
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326. - Attack!
- Yeah!
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327. Get him! Jump on him!
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328. Plastic at twelve o'clock!
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329. - Let's kick some Gorgonite butt!
- Archer, where are you, anyway?
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330. I am in so much trouble.
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331. There will be no mercy.
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332. This is what you meant?
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333. How could toys do this?
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334. Alas, poor Troglokhan.
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335. I'm sorry, Archer.
That's all the pieces I could find.
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336. The Commando Elite
have destroyed Troglokhan.
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337. What about the other Gorgonites?
Ancl where are the Commandos?
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338. Hi. We're closed.
See the sign?
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339. I'll be quick. I just came for Major Chip
and the monster.
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340. - I can't sell you them. Sorry.
- But you're the only store that has them.
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341. - And my parents just caved.
- The toys are gone, alright?
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342. Well, what about him?
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343. Oh, him...
He's defective.
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344. - And the rest were stolen.
- That's too bad.
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345. Alan...
we must find the...
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346. Oh, my God.
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347. Who did this?
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348. Are you pulling
some kind of insurance scam?
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349. I swear, I did one thing wrong.
That's it! And I'm branded for life.
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350. So, it is true.
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351. I heard your parents moved here because
you got kicked out of ten different schools.
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352. - I did not.
- No?
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353. - It was two.
- Only two...
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354. So...
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355. you need some help?
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356. - Alan, can I talk now?
- No.
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357. I can't believe
they broke my dad's radio.
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358. Do you ever watch that show,
Family of Five?
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359. - Sure...
- You like it?
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360. - It's okay.
- Thank God!
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361. Me neither.
I hate it. It's so lame.
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362. - I'm sick of hearing it's so great.
- I can't stand the parents. They're so nice.
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363. - The worst. Where do these go?
- Over there.
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364. I'm more of an
X-l-'I/es guy myself.
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365. "The truth is out there",
Alan.
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366. - You like Led Zeppelin?
- Yeah, they're the greatest.
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367. They're my favorite band.
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368. - You're not like other girls.
- I know.
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369. I can't believe we've finished.
It took less time than I thought.
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370. Ancl the boat looks great.
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371. It wasn't that messed up.
The mast was the hardest part.
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372. He'll never know.
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373. So, what did you do?
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374. Come on, Alan.
I've heard the story ten times already.
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375. Don't deny it.
They say you're a real terror.
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376. Yeah, that's me,
a real terror.
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377. I did some graffiti, flooded the faculty bathroom.
Stuff like that.
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378. My shrink told my parents
I was "acting out."
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379. I heard you called a bomb scare
on Parents' Day.
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380. - That's when I got caught.
- Bummer.
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381. I got put on probation
for a while.
Copy !req
382. But that was a long time ago.
I'm a totally different person now.
Copy !req
383. - Sure.
- No, really.
Copy !req
384. Hey, Alan, how's it going?
Copy !req
385. Dad.
Copy !req
386. I was on my way home from the airport.
I thought I'd stop to say hello.
Copy !req
387. - Ancl check up on me?
- Ancl check up on you.
Copy !req
388. Of course. That's my job.
Me Dad, you son, right?
Copy !req
389. - This is Christy.
- Hi.
Copy !req
390. - From next door.
- Hello.
Copy !req
391. - Alan, what happened here?
- Nothing.
Copy !req
392. Nothing happened.
Copy !req
393. Oh, really?
Copy !req
394. - Then, how do you explain this?
- I was dusting it and it fell over.
Copy !req
395. Dusting with what?
A croquet mallet?
Copy !req
396. I should go.
Copy !req
397. I almost forgot my stuff.
Copy !req
398. Bye, Alan.
Copy !req
399. You go home, too.
I'll close up.
Copy !req
400. - I can do it.
- Obviously you can't. Go home.
Copy !req
401. Alan!
Copy !req
402. - I'm really sorry about that.
- I have parents, too.
Copy !req
403. If that's all he sees,
you got off lucky.
Copy !req
404. - Here are your toys.
- Thanks.
Copy !req
405. Hey Christy, what happened?
I thought you were coming by practice today.
Copy !req
406. Sorry, Brad.
Something else came up.
Copy !req
407. I know you. You're the kid
who set his old school on fire, right?
Copy !req
408. - Yeah, just to watch it burn.
- Whatever.
Copy !req
409. We got a scrimmage with the JV.
Come on, you can cheer me on.
Copy !req
410. Great.
Copy !req
411. See you later.
Copy !req
412. Let's see...
Copy !req
413. What do I need?
Copy !req
414. Coping saw.
Copy !req
415. I don't believe it!
Copy !req
416. - Alan, we must...
- Shut up!
Copy !req
417. - The Gorgonites...
- You're nothing but trouble.
Copy !req
418. Alan, we must...
Copy !req
419. Link Static to command post.
Copy !req
420. Have targeted single Gorgonite
with civilian escort.
Copy !req
421. Approaching your position.
Over.
Copy !req
422. Roger, Private Static.
Copy that.
Copy !req
423. Brick Bazooka,
front and center.
Copy !req
424. - Sir!
- Prepare for assault, Sergeant.
Copy !req
425. Don't fire till you see
the whites of his eyes.
Copy !req
426. Prepare to fire the bazooka.
Copy !req
427. Fire!
Copy !req
428. Gorgoniten K9-Korps.
Copy !req
429. Watch it.
I'll have your dog tags.
Copy !req
430. What are you doing here?
Copy !req
431. Go home.
Copy !req
432. Coming LIP-
Copy !req
433. Hand over hand.
Copy !req
434. I'm coming for you, Gorgonite.
Copy !req
435. Damn potholes.
Copy !req
436. Command post to Brick Bazooka.
Report.
Copy !req
437. This is command post.
Report.
Copy !req
438. Brick Bazooka reporting.
Copy !req
439. Target escaped
en route to enemy stronghold, sir.
Copy !req
440. I'm pretty messed up, sir.
Copy !req
441. H0/d on, son.
We're on our way.
Copy !req
442. - Wrong gauge.
- Insert tab A into slot B.
Copy !req
443. Turn until click.
Copy !req
444. Bite the bullet, pal.
It'll be okay.
Copy !req
445. Here's the tape.
Let's close him up.
Copy !req
446. Go ahead, kid.
Let it out.
Copy !req
447. It's a small world after all.
Copy !req
448. Hello, Heartland Play Systems.
How may I help you?
Copy !req
449. Yes, I'm having some trouble
with one of your...
Copy !req
450. What is the name of the toy
and the nature of the problem?
Copy !req
451. - The toys are the Gorgonites.
- There are no more Gorgonites.
Copy !req
452. Ancl the Commando Elite.
Copy !req
453. - They are the mortal enemies of the Gorgonites.
- And What is the prob/em?
Copy !req
454. The Commandos wrecked my dad's store
and destroyed the Gorgonites!
Copy !req
455. The Commando Elite are designed
to fight the Gorgonites.
Copy !req
456. No, they destroyed them,
and now they're gone!
Copy !req
457. I'm sorry, but Heart/and P/a y Systems
does not rep/ace lost toys.
Copy !req
458. I didn't lose them!
ls there a machine I can talk to?
Copy !req
459. - Just transfer me to a machine!
- Fine.
Copy !req
460. - Have a nice clay, ma'am.
- I'm not a ma'am!
Copy !req
461. Please state the name of your toy
and nature of your prob/em.
Copy !req
462. Your damn Commando Elite
wrecked my dad's store...
Copy !req
463. destroyed the super Gorgonites and ran off!
Got it? Lawsuit! Got that?
Copy !req
464. Alan Abernathy,
330-555-0125.
Copy !req
465. - Destroy Gorgonites...
- Shut up!
Copy !req
466. - Alan...
- Don't talk to me!
Copy !req
467. Not a word!
Copy !req
468. On Monday morning,
at 0900 hours...
Copy !req
469. 250,000 Commandos and
250,000 Gorgonites will fight side by side...
Copy !req
470. with children everywhere,
trying to separate mommy and daddy...
Copy !req
471. from the money
in their wallets.
Copy !req
472. Larry...
Copy !req
473. Okay, now listen to this.
Copy !req
474. They cover 100 merchandise licensees
for the next two months.
Copy !req
475. You won't be able to turn on a TV,
board a bus...
Copy !req
476. open a lunch box,
or put on your own underwear...
Copy !req
477. without seeing the Gorgonites
raging war with the Commando Elite!
Copy !req
478. What do you think of that,
Mr. Mars?
Copy !req
479. Well, it's a start.
Copy !req
480. Larry...? Larry.
Copy !req
481. Larry, folks.
Copy !req
482. - You know, when I started this company...
- We have to talk.
Copy !req
483. - Get off of me.
- We have a big problem. It's urgent.
Copy !req
484. What are you doing here?
Stop it. Get away from me.
Copy !req
485. A/an Abernathy, 330-555-0...
Copy !req
486. That's where voice mail
cut him off.
Copy !req
487. - It's not a problem.
- It's not?
Copy !req
488. No. These things go on sale Monday.
How did this kid get hold of them?
Copy !req
489. It's industrial espionage.
I got two words for you: Counter suit.
Copy !req
490. One word: Countersuit.
Two words...
Copy !req
491. It's two words, Larry!
What if this kid's telling the truth?
Copy !req
492. We can't have toys out on the market
that may be dangerous.
Copy !req
493. Come on! How can they be dangerous?
Everything on them is standard.
Copy !req
494. The design is standard,
the materials are standard...
Copy !req
495. the mechanicals are standard.
Even the...
Copy !req
496. - What's, "Oh"?
- What?
Copy !req
497. - You just said, "Oh."
- No, I said, "Oh."
Copy !req
498. "Oh" like, "That's interesting"
or like, "We're screwed"?
Copy !req
499. No. I mean, "hey, whoa, 0h".
Copy !req
500. Forget the "Oh". I'll go to legal
to start on the countersuit.
Copy !req
501. The chips!
Copy !req
502. That's the "Oh."
Yeah! These microprocessing chips.
Copy !req
503. - What do they do and where did you get them from?
- You know, they microprocess.
Copy !req
504. Ancl they come from
the land of "l Saved Your Job".
Copy !req
505. They were designed
for the Defense Department.
Copy !req
506. You put munitions chips
in toys?
Copy !req
507. Archer...
Copy !req
508. emissary of the Gorgonites.
Copy !req
509. Where are you?
Copy !req
510. Beware.
There will be no mercy.
Copy !req
511. We're lost.
We need to find our homeland.
Copy !req
512. Yeah, our homeland.
Copy !req
513. We're in trouble.
Please find us.
Copy !req
514. - You've got to help us find Goron.
- Goron?
Copy !req
515. It's "Gorgon", moron.
Copy !req
516. I hope he comes. We're no match
for the awesome Commandos.
Copy !req
517. Yeah, everything else
is just a toy.
Copy !req
518. Kitty, kitty, kitty...
Copy !req
519. - Grab him! Hold him down!
- Hold him down!
Copy !req
520. Get that leg!
Copy !req
521. String him up!
Copy !req
522. Tell us what we want to know.
Copy !req
523. I am Archer,
emissary of the Gorgonites.
Copy !req
524. Archer?
Copy !req
525. Where are the rest
of the Gorgonite scum?
Copy !req
526. We have ways
of making you talk.
Copy !req
527. Make it easy on yourself.
If you tell us, we'll let you go.
Copy !req
528. It will go easier for you
if you cooperate.
Copy !req
529. I am Archer,
emissary of the Gorgonites.
Copy !req
530. Alright!
Let's dispose of this garbage.
Copy !req
531. - Hey, it's the kid.
- Commandos, pull back! Retrograde movement!
Copy !req
532. Hey!
Copy !req
533. You little...
Copy !req
534. - Give me that!
- That's mine, punk!
Copy !req
535. Surrender, Gorgonite ally.
Copy !req
536. - You just met your match.
- Oh, yeah?
Copy !req
537. Surrender or die!
Copy !req
538. Medic! Medic!
Copy !req
539. Come out!
Copy !req
540. Alan, what the hell
is going on here?
Copy !req
541. - Medic!
- Alan, your hand! What happened?
Copy !req
542. How did you cut your hand?
And what are you doing down here?
Copy !req
543. - Medic!
- Mom, Dad, it's okay.
Copy !req
544. While you were gone,
I bought some soldier toys from Joe.
Copy !req
545. I figured I could sell them
before you got back.
Copy !req
546. Ancl for once, I would have made
the store a little money.
Copy !req
547. I know it was the wrong thing to do.
I'm sorry.
Copy !req
548. There, I said it.
Copy !req
549. Well...
Copy !req
550. Okay...
Copy !req
551. I think it's very honest of you
to tell the truth.
Copy !req
552. So, you pawned my woodworking tools
so you could pay Joe?
Copy !req
553. - No! I'm pretty sure the toys took them.
- What?
Copy !req
554. The toys.
Copy !req
555. Are you trying to upset me?
I mean, are you deliberately making...?
Copy !req
556. Stop it...
Copy !req
557. - What was the word? Projected...
- aggression.
Copy !req
558. - Projected aggression...
- It's not aggression!
Copy !req
559. It's these toys!
It's like they're alive. Look
Copy !req
560. Come on, Archer.
Back me up here.
Copy !req
561. Say something.
Copy !req
562. Halt! Who goes there?
Talk to me!
Copy !req
563. Alan... Alan, please.
Copy !req
564. I need to ask you this:
Copy !req
565. - Are you on crank?
- No!
Copy !req
566. - Then is it crystal meth, tar, smack?
- Irene...
Copy !req
567. - We need to know!
- Mom, I'm not on drugs!
Copy !req
568. - It's these soldiers!
- Alright, that's it! Stop it.
Copy !req
569. I mean, Alan, I...
lam...
Copy !req
570. at a loss
Copy !req
571. Why did“ ygfiu!
mg?
Copy !req
572. "Shut up! Don't talk to me!
Not a word!"
Copy !req
573. Wise guy.
I should shred the bunch of you.
Copy !req
574. My clad thinks I'm insane.
Christy thinks I'm an idiot...
Copy !req
575. and when Joe finds out
I can't pay him back, he'll break my legs.
Copy !req
576. - The Gorgonites are not destroyed.
- What?
Copy !req
577. Major Hazard seeks the location
of the Gorgonite scum.
Copy !req
578. They are not destroyed.
Copy !req
579. 'Cause if the Commandos destroyed them
they wouldn't be looking for them.
Copy !req
580. Alright, where are they?
Copy !req
581. My Gorgonite brothers are doing
what the Gorgonites do best:
Copy !req
582. They are hiding.
Copy !req
583. - Commando Elite, fall in!
- Sir! Yes, sir!
Copy !req
584. We have met the enemy.
He is big. He is fast.
Copy !req
585. He has allied himself
with the Gorgonite scum.
Copy !req
586. The rules of engagement have changed.
Private Static!
Copy !req
587. Damn!
Copy !req
588. Wow!
This place is a gold mine.
Copy !req
589. Holy smokes.
Look at all this hardware.
Copy !req
590. - Technological superiority.
- Dibs on the chain saw.
Copy !req
591. Falling in, sir...
Copy !req
592. Out of the way.
Copy !req
593. It's only a flesh wound, sir.
Copy !req
594. Rest easy.
You've clone your job.
Copy !req
595. Did we win?
Copy !req
596. We will.
Copy !req
597. Nick Nitro's battery has run out.
Copy !req
598. But his memory will keep going
and going and going.
Copy !req
599. His death will be avenged.
Copy !req
600. Commandos, secure the perimeter!
Tap all communications!
Copy !req
601. Roll some armor!
We got us a war to win.
Copy !req
602. If it launches,
lacerates or detonates...
Copy !req
603. - I want it mobile and I want it lethal!
- Sir! Yes, sir!
Copy !req
604. They're not in the storeroom,
they're not here.
Copy !req
605. Monsters shouldn't be hiding
but fighting Commandos.
Copy !req
606. We would lose.
It is what we were programmed to do.
Copy !req
607. Hide and lose?
Those are some great options...
Copy !req
608. If I was a Gorgonite,
where would I be?
Copy !req
609. I'm hiding because I'm a loser.
I've got zero self-esteem...
Copy !req
610. and my brain's
the size of a peanut.
Copy !req
611. Where would I be?
Copy !req
612. This is so gross.
Copy !req
613. Hello?
ls anybody in there?
Copy !req
614. Hey!
Copy !req
615. Ocula!
Copy !req
616. - What was that?
- It's the Gorgonites.
Copy !req
617. Ocula.
Copy !req
618. Punch-It. Scratch-It.
Copy !req
619. Hey, hey, hey! Great to be back.
But seriously, what a dump.
Copy !req
620. Insaniac.
Copy !req
621. Okay! Hey, are you a kid or oil painting?
Now, seriously, folks...
Copy !req
622. Don't worry, Archer.
We was hiding.
Copy !req
623. Slamfist.
Copy !req
624. Troglokhan?
Copy !req
625. - We fixed him.
- We tried to fix him.
Copy !req
626. - Hey, my dad's radio.
- Some assembly required.
Copy !req
627. 50 am lnuts? What? going on here?
Give me a ca/l, 1-800-TALK-To-ME.
Copy !req
628. Freaky.
Copy !req
629. Like Frankenstein.
Copy !req
630. At least you're all here.
Maybe Joe won't break my legs after all.
Copy !req
631. Access approved.
Copy !req
632. Let me get this straight.
Copy !req
633. You used my password to order surplus
military chips that might be dangerous?
Copy !req
634. Hey! Hey! Hey!
It's okay. It's okay.
Copy !req
635. That's supposed to happen.
See? Clean room.
Copy !req
636. Clean. Let's just go in.
Copy !req
637. - You okay?
- Yeah, yeah...
Copy !req
638. That's him. That's Ralph.
Copy !req
639. - Hi.
- Who are you? You don't belong here.
Copy !req
640. I'm Larry Benson. You supplied
my division with some microchips.
Copy !req
641. Oh yes. Larry Benson...
Copy !req
642. The X1000. Worked out better
than you dreamed, didn't they?
Copy !req
643. Actually,
there was a little problem.
Copy !req
644. Then it's with your software.
Copy !req
645. I don't think there's a problem
with the software, Ralph.
Copy !req
646. Oh, you don't?
Copy !req
647. The X1000 is a masterpiece.
Copy !req
648. Imagine a microchip...
Copy !req
649. sophisticated enough to control
the guidance systems of ballistic missiles.
Copy !req
650. Imagine it can be used to instantly upgrade
any system it's plugged into.
Copy !req
651. Like a smart drug for machines.
Then, imagine it can learn.
Copy !req
652. What are you talking about?
Artificial intelligence?
Copy !req
653. No. Actual intelligence.
Copy !req
654. No wonder those philistines
at the Pentagon didn't appreciate it.
Copy !req
655. One flaw and they scrap
the whole project.
Copy !req
656. So there is a flaw in the chips.
Copy !req
657. Well...
they're a little bit sensitive to EMP.
Copy !req
658. EMP...?
Electromagnetic pulse?
Copy !req
659. Yeah, you know, the kind generated
by the detonation of a nuclear device.
Copy !req
660. I doubt even the toy industry
has become quite that competitive.
Copy !req
661. They said, "Adequate shielding
wasn't cost effective."
Copy !req
662. Did the Medici
ever tell Michelangelo:
Copy !req
663. "Sorry, Mike, marble's not cost-effective.
Here's a bag of cement"? I think not!
Copy !req
664. - Gesundheit.
- Thank you.
Copy !req
665. There shouldn't be any problem,
just because the chips can learn.
Copy !req
666. Am I not being clear?
Copy !req
667. They learn within the boundaries
of their programming.
Copy !req
668. Whatever the core programming,
the X1000 enhances it.
Copy !req
669. So, if you have a problem,
it's in your software.
Copy !req
670. Quick impression: Jimmy Cagney.
"Top of the world, Ma."
Copy !req
671. Talk about
hampering your career.
Copy !req
672. Grab him!
Copy !req
673. It looks so real, don't it?
Copy !req
674. Hit him.
Copy !req
675. Friend of yours?
Copy !req
676. What am I going to do
with you guys?
Copy !req
677. 221... 222...
Copy !req
678. Oh... There goes the record.
Copy !req
679. Hey, not so close.
You'll ruin your eye.
Copy !req
680. What are you looking at?
Copy !req
681. I dunno.
Copy !req
682. - Hello?
- Alan?
Copy !req
683. - Christy?
- Well, are you grounded?
Copy !req
684. - No, my dad coo/ed off
- So, we did it.
Copy !req
685. Yeah, and the best part is,
I found all those lost toys.
Copy !req
686. - You were really a big help.
- Cool.
Copy !req
687. - Hey!
- So, Alan, boxers or briefs?
Copy !req
688. - Get those off your head.
- But seriously...
Copy !req
689. HeY, what's going on?
Copy !req
690. Nothing.
Copy !req
691. Listen, I was thinking maybe
we should celebrate sometime.
Copy !req
692. Go to a movie or something.
Copy !req
693. Alan, I only date older guys.
It's nothing personal.
Copy !req
694. What / mean i5
ofiicia/ly /'m going out with Brad.
Copy !req
695. What about unofficially?
Or... superficially?
Copy !req
696. There is one guy. But he's kind of
a smart aleck and a bit of a troublemaker.
Copy !req
697. I'm sure he'a' be willing
to give it a// up for you.
Copy !req
698. - I know/ would.
- Oh, A/an.
Copy !req
699. It's party time!
Copy !req
700. One phat ride!
Copy !req
701. Transmission intercepted.
Copy !req
702. The Gorgonites are bivouacked
at the enemy stronghold.
Copy !req
703. Ancl the enemy has revealed
an age-old weakness.
Copy !req
704. I'm sure he'd be willing to give it a// up for you.
I know/ would.
Copy !req
705. Put yourself in
for a commendation.
Copy !req
706. Soldiers!
We have a window of opportunity.
Copy !req
707. We will exploit it, drown the enemy out
and crush the Gorgonites!
Copy !req
708. We must go behind enemy lines
to secure a hostage.
Copy !req
709. Prepare to move out.
Hop it, jarheads!
Copy !req
710. I guess you guys are safe
as long as you stay here.
Copy !req
711. - What are you looking for?
- Gorgon.
Copy !req
712. - This is a national park.
- The Isle of Gorgon is our homeland.
Copy !req
713. - Will you help us find it?
- I don't think you will find it in there.
Copy !req
714. Alan, if Gorgon is not in that window,
is it in this one?
Copy !req
715. There's nothing in windows.
Copy !req
716. There's stuff outside them.
Copy !req
717. What stuff?
Copy !req
718. You know, outside.
Trees, power poles...
Copy !req
719. - Christy's house
- And beyond that?
Copy !req
720. The mall.
Copy !req
721. - And beyond that?
- The highway.
Copy !req
722. Ancl beyond that?
Copy !req
723. About a million acres of farm.
Copy !req
724. And what's beyond that?
Copy !req
725. I don't know.
Copy !req
726. Gorgon.
Copy !req
727. Live, via satellite, 257 channels.
Copy !req
728. Closed captioning for the hearing impaired
and Dolby stereo where available -
Copy !req
729. which is right here,
right now!
Copy !req
730. What a great picture.
It's perfect.
Copy !req
731. I don't know...
It looks kind of fuzzy.
Copy !req
732. Let me try something else.
Copy !req
733. Oh, for pete's sake!
Phil!
Copy !req
734. Maybe if I tweak the brightness
a little.
Copy !req
735. No, no, it's the chroma.
The flesh tone's way off.
Copy !req
736. - No. Now it's green.
- Stand down, men.
Copy !req
737. - There's a ghost.
- We must neutralize these civilians.
Copy !req
738. I paid a lot for this thing.
I don't want any ghosts.
Copy !req
739. Follow me.
Copy !req
740. It's a trap, sir.
Copy !req
741. Bring it here, soldier.
Copy !req
742. Chemical warfare.
Copy !req
743. Operation Sandman.
Copy !req
744. Fire when ready, Private.
Copy !req
745. Audie Murphy.
Our most decorated war hero.
Copy !req
746. I think World War ll
was my favorite war.
Copy !req
747. No sign of the target, sir.
Area is secured.
Copy !req
748. Don't worry.
She'll be here.
Copy !req
749. This is where
we'll engage the target.
Copy !req
750. Set up concealed positions
and prepare for ambush.
Copy !req
751. Oh, man!
Copy !req
752. I can't believe
they got me the whole set.
Copy !req
753. Hold your fire, men.
Copy !req
754. Cool, you can talk.
You must be the leader.
Copy !req
755. Except one clay, you get shot.
Copy !req
756. And this guy gets promoted.
Ancl now he's the leader. Yes!
Copy !req
757. - It wasn't my idea, Major.
- Commandos, attack!
Copy !req
758. Pile on the kid!
Copy !req
759. Son, you can be a prisoner or a casualty.
It's up to you.
Copy !req
760. - Sir, over here, Sir.
- Oh, man, I hate babysitting.
Copy !req
761. - What is it, soldier?
- Take a look, sir.
Copy !req
762. Bombshells, sir.
Copy !req
763. Fully posable...
Copy !req
764. Hello, dolly!
Copy !req
765. Sweet stuff!
Copy !req
766. Hubba-hubba.
Copy !req
767. - R and R, sir?
- Request a 3-day pass, sir.
Copy !req
768. Denied. Gentlemen, this is the new army.
Those are reinforcements.
Copy !req
769. Bring me the head of Nick Nitro.
Move.
Copy !req
770. Soldier, your memory will live on.
Copy !req
771. - Damn...
- Criminy!
Copy !req
772. I think I'm gonna hurl.
Copy !req
773. A mind is a terrible thing to waste.
Copy !req
774. It's alive! It's alive!
Copy !req
775. Hi, there. Cannon Fodder Gwendy,
reporting for duty, sir.
Copy !req
776. Carry on, soldier.
Copy !req
777. I feel your pain.
Copy !req
778. Alan, the Commando Elite
are in the trees.
Copy !req
779. They're not moving
because of the Commandos.
Copy !req
780. It's the wind.
Copy !req
781. - See?
- I see your hand.
Copy !req
782. The wind is blowing.
You can feel it.
Copy !req
783. Feel?
Copy !req
784. Rig ht. Plastic. Sorry.
Copy !req
785. It's kind of hard to describe.
Copy !req
786. Weather patterns,
wind chill factor.
Copy !req
787. Just because you can't see it,
doesn't mean it doesn't exist.
Copy !req
788. See?
Copy !req
789. Wind.
Copy !req
790. Mom? Dad? I'm home.
Copy !req
791. They're asleep.
Copy !req
792. - You know what that means?
- They could wake up any second.
Copy !req
793. - You know, you are such a major hottie.
- And you are such a major sweet talker.
Copy !req
794. - Good night.
- Night.
Copy !req
795. My bike won't start. I got nowhere to go.
Can I come in?
Copy !req
796. No, that's not it.
Copy !req
797. Don't hate me
because I'm beautiful.
Copy !req
798. Let's do something fun.
We'll all get facials.
Copy !req
799. Did I overpluck my eyebrows?
Copy !req
800. Now it's our turn
to play with you
Copy !req
801. Let's see
if her head comes off.
Copy !req
802. Christy!
Copy !req
803. Look. A man. Alley-oop.
Copy !req
804. Such nice broad shoulders.
Do you work out?
Copy !req
805. What's your sign, big boy?
Copy !req
806. Makeovers are such a blast.
Copy !req
807. That haircut
is so five minutes ago.
Copy !req
808. Are you dumping me?
Copy !req
809. Get off!
Copy !req
810. You! Maggot!
Copy !req
811. - An officer and a gentleman does't strike a lady.
- What?
Copy !req
812. Are you scared?
Copy !req
813. We're all scared.
Copy !req
814. You'd have to be crazy
not to be scared.
Copy !req
815. What?
Copy !req
816. What? What do you see?
Copy !req
817. Ocula? Are you Alright?
Copy !req
818. Settle down. You'll be okay.
Copy !req
819. "Surrender"?
Copy !req
820. - Smile, girlie.
- Wan, /'m safe. Lha ve not been harmed. €
Copy !req
821. Christy?
Copy !req
822. ”/ am making this statement of my
own free will and under no duress.”
Copy !req
823. - Yeah, right“!
- Stick to the scr/jot Read it as we Wrote it.
Copy !req
824. - Okay...
- Make it snappy.
Copy !req
825. ”/ will be released
safe/y and unharmed...
Copy !req
826. only if the fol/owing conditions
are met:
Copy !req
827. Surrender the Gorgon/te scum. €
Copy !req
828. - Thatt it.
- Faster, or we stick you.
Copy !req
829. - A/an, you have to he/p.
- Zoom in. Get those tears.
Copy !req
830. - Stop /t...!
- What else is on?
Copy !req
831. NO!
Copy !req
832. If Major Chip Hazard wants a war,
we'll give him a war.
Copy !req
833. Please, Alan, don't do this.
Copy !req
834. - We're afraid.
- We're your friends.
Copy !req
835. - Have mercy.
- You are a traitor.
Copy !req
836. Hi, how you doin' tonight?
Welcome to the big cardboard box.
Copy !req
837. We'll never see Gorgon again.
Copy !req
838. - Alan seemed so nice.
- Why would he do this to us?
Copy !req
839. Three words, folks:
Pu-ber-ty.
Copy !req
840. Enemy contact.
Advance with caution. Roll!
Copy !req
841. Sorry, sir.
Copy !req
842. How could you betray us?
We're free.
Copy !req
843. - Have mercy.
- The Commandos will kill us.
Copy !req
844. Gentlemen, it looks like they blinked.
Advance and envelop.
Copy !req
845. Sir! Yes, sir!
Copy !req
846. Alan, I'm feeling very insecure.
Copy !req
847. I'm allergic to cardboard.
Pass it on.
Copy !req
848. Are you ready, Archer?
Copy !req
849. Alan, are you sure
this is a good idea?
Copy !req
850. - Alan, you traitor.
- We Gorgonites must be free.
Copy !req
851. - I don't feel well.
- Alan, don't do it. You'll be guilt-ridden.
Copy !req
852. My aunt was buried alive.
I'm very claustrophobic.
Copy !req
853. Rock and roll!
Copy !req
854. I love this job!
Copy !req
855. Are you Alright?
Copy !req
856. All my make-up is cruelty-free.
Copy !req
857. - You come here often?
- Will you take me to the prom?
Copy !req
858. If you can't accessorize,
pulverize.
Copy !req
859. You've been a bad boy.
Now you must be punished.
Copy !req
860. Watch out, girls.
Hissy fit.
Copy !req
861. You're to die for.
Copy !req
862. Run! She's got a baton!
Copy !req
863. It's a baton death march.
Copy !req
864. She's gone postal!
Copy !req
865. Oh, I broke a nail.
Copy !req
866. - I've always hated these things!
- Oh, the humanity!
Copy !req
867. This is it, men.
Copy !req
868. Commandos, the enemy has deployed
a decoy target.
Copy !req
869. Return to primary positions.
Copy !req
870. This is fun!
Copy !req
871. You bitch, you're killing me!
Copy !req
872. Christy... Christy!
Copy !req
873. You rescued me.
Copy !req
874. Anytime.
Copy !req
875. Let's go get those creeps.
Copy !req
876. We have to wake my parents.
Copy !req
877. Open fire!
Copy !req
878. We have the enemy on the run.
Exploit and pursue.
Copy !req
879. - You've clone this before.
- Once or twice.
Copy !req
880. Watch it.
Copy !req
881. You watch it.
Copy !req
882. We got to get help.
Copy !req
883. Anyone got a garage door opener?
Copy !req
884. Commandos, attack!
Copy !req
885. Hey...
Copy !req
886. Time to plant the corn.
Copy !req
887. Expect no mercy, Gorgonite ally!
Copy !req
888. I'll get the bike.
Copy !req
889. Get on! Hurry!
Copy !req
890. Hot pursuit!
Copy !req
891. Interlock!
Copy !req
892. Right side, lock!
Left side, lock!
Copy !req
893. Ramming speed!
Copy !req
894. Hold on!
Copy !req
895. They're toast.
Copy !req
896. - You think I could drive home?
- Good idea.
Copy !req
897. Hey!
Copy !req
898. Your kid kidnapped my daughter!
Copy !req
899. He tied up my son and drugged me and my wife.
Marion is still tripping!
Copy !req
900. Time to hide again.
Copy !req
901. Not to mention
the damage to my house.
Copy !req
902. We have lost the battle.
We will not lose the war.
Copy !req
903. That's the last of them.
Copy !req
904. I think that's all of Friday's delivery.
Why did they want it back?
Copy !req
905. You know the clowns
that make these decisions.
Copy !req
906. They don't care we're standing around
freezing, in the middle of the night...
Copy !req
907. as long as everyone knows
who's in charge.
Copy !req
908. Corporations.
Copy !req
909. Right hand doesn't know
what the left hand is screwing up.
Copy !req
910. Greetings.
You've been drafted.
Copy !req
911. - Move!
- Is this entire household insane?
Copy !req
912. He says that toy is alive
just because it moves a little.
Copy !req
913. What's next? The Blue Fairy
drops by with a talking cricket?
Copy !req
914. Dad, he's telling the truth!
Copy !req
915. He's brainwashed you, hasn't he?
Don't worry, honey.
Copy !req
916. We'll get you the best deprogrammer
money can buy.
Copy !req
917. You can't change programming.
Copy !req
918. Look. Another one.
Copy !req
919. I told you they were hiding.
It's what they do.
Copy !req
920. - That's it. Come on, Christy.
- Dad!
Copy !req
921. - Timmy, Marion, we're out of here.
- Oh, no...
Copy !req
922. Don't be a stranger, Phil.
Copy !req
923. Yes, we're with Heartland Play Systems,
Consumer Satisfaction.
Copy !req
924. - Is Alan Abernathy here?
- That's Alan, right there.
Copy !req
925. How you doing? We understand
you acquired some of our fine products.
Copy !req
926. There's a chance they might be...
defective.
Copy !req
927. But there's no reason to think
they could do any harm.
Copy !req
928. - Oh, there's reasons.
- There is a problem with the Commandos.
Copy !req
929. Really What problem? Bear in mind, you will be
called into court to support your claim.
Copy !req
930. - Your toys nearly killed my son!
- Stuart...
Copy !req
931. Don't say calm down!
Calm was killing me.
Copy !req
932. Yo And You! u owe
my son an apology!
Copy !req
933. Hey, Larry. Look.
It's Archer.
Copy !req
934. Greetings. I am Archer.
Who are you?
Copy !req
935. I'm Irwin.
I designed you and all the Gorgonites.
Copy !req
936. - He's the creator.
- Hey...
Copy !req
937. - You're all here.
- Everyone has to be somewhere.
Copy !req
938. That's true.
My mom used to...
Copy !req
939. Making declarative statements?
Formulating inquiries?
Copy !req
940. Lights out.
Copy !req
941. Something's going on out there.
Copy !req
942. That's weird.
There's a Heartland truck outside.
Copy !req
943. - More Commandos?
- A lot more.
Copy !req
944. Dad, come see this for yourself.
Copy !req
945. " Chip?
" Chip?
Copy !req
946. - Dead Chip? The Chip we killed?
- Maybe we didn't kill him enough.
Copy !req
947. Oh, my...
Copy !req
948. Commandos, fall out!
Copy !req
949. Secure the left perimeter!
Secure the right perimeter! Move out!
Copy !req
950. Sir, yes, sir!
Copy !req
951. Assault formation. Go!
Copy !req
952. If war is hell,
let's give them hell.
Copy !req
953. We didn't start this war,
but we're damn sure going to end it.
Copy !req
954. I'm scared.
Copy !req
955. It'll be Alright.
They're not after you.
Copy !req
956. They just want to kill
the little monster people.
Copy !req
957. That's right. We're just caught up
in some stupid game.
Copy !req
958. Well, game over.
Copy !req
959. - Mr. Fimple, wait a second.
- No, Alan.
Copy !req
960. Let him go.
Copy !req
961. - Archer...
- The Gorgonites must lose.
Copy !req
962. Hi!
Copy !req
963. I'm Phil Fimple.
Copy !req
964. I'm here to negotiate
the surrender of the...
Copy !req
965. Gorgonzolas.
Here's our proposal:
Copy !req
966. - Hey!
- Take them!
Copy !req
967. He's selling us out.
The guy's a regular Arnold Benedict.
Copy !req
968. Switch 'em off, take them apart, steal
their batteries, whatever it is you...
Copy !req
969. People do.
Copy !req
970. Hey...
Copy !req
971. Is that my JVC?
Copy !req
972. There will be no surrender!
There will be no mercy!
Copy !req
973. All Gorgonite scum must die!
Copy !req
974. - Bomb them all the way back to preschool.
- Recon estimates Gorgonite scum strength at 16!
Copy !req
975. 16?
Where did they get 16 from?
Copy !req
976. Seven Gorgonites
and nine people.
Copy !req
977. - Well, you heard our proposal.
- Phil, get in here! Hurry!
Copy !req
978. These negotiations are over!
Copy !req
979. We are the Commando Elite.
Everything else... is just a toy.
Copy !req
980. - What are they doing?
- Psychological warfare.
Copy !req
981. The Marines did this
against Noriega.
Copy !req
982. - Phil. Phil!
- What?
Copy !req
983. I love this song!
Copy !req
984. Fimple, turn that off!
Copy !req
985. Go, go] go!
Copy !req
986. Lock and load.
Copy !req
987. Nail them!
Copy !req
988. Open fire!
Copy !req
989. Get down!
Copy !req
990. - They're shooting again!
- Oh no!
Copy !req
991. Fimple.
Copy !req
992. - Honey?
- Oh, boy...
Copy !req
993. Stuart, Phil, barricade that window!
Alan, get back.
Copy !req
994. Get back!
Copy !req
995. Fire!
Copy !req
996. Wow!
Copy !req
997. Fire!
Copy !req
998. - How are they...
- Look out! Back!
Copy !req
999. Alan, put out the fires.
Nerds, side windows.
Copy !req
1000. Marion, Timmy...
Copy !req
1001. the closet.
Come on, come on. Hurry!
Copy !req
1002. Just get in.
Get down.
Copy !req
1003. - I have that coat.
- Yes.
Copy !req
1004. Frag 'em all!
Copy !req
1005. - I'll call the police!
- Phil, Christy, push this back. Careful.
Copy !req
1006. Fire!
Copy !req
1007. Service.
Copy !req
1008. Great balls of fire!
Copy !req
1009. The phone's dead.
Nice forehand, honey.
Copy !req
1010. Incoming!
Copy !req
1011. I'm hit!
Copy !req
1012. More shells!
Copy !req
1013. Take the house!
Copy !req
1014. We have to stop them
before my wife gets tennis elbow.
Copy !req
1015. An electromagnetic pulse would work.
That would fry the chips.
Copy !req
1016. Great, all we need now
is a nuclear warhead.
Copy !req
1017. I doubt I'll have one
in the junk drawer.
Copy !req
1018. Nuclear warhead?
What are you talking about?
Copy !req
1019. The chips aren't shielded against an EMP.
A nuclear blast would wipe them out.
Copy !req
1020. That's why the military
never used them.
Copy !req
1021. What kind of moron
would put military technology in toys?
Copy !req
1022. That would be "Gizmo"
over here.
Copy !req
1023. Actually, any electrical device generates
a magnetic field, just not a big one.
Copy !req
1024. We'll need a big one.
Copy !req
1025. Fire in the hole!
Copy !req
1026. Alan, the window.
Copy !req
1027. I don't know but I've been told
Gorgonite blood runs mighty cold.
Copy !req
1028. No, Alan.
Copy !req
1029. Way to stay heads up.
Copy !req
1030. Continue artillery barrage!
Copy !req
1031. Take cover! Stay low!
Copy !req
1032. There's a power pole back there
with two huge transformers.
Copy !req
1033. Could we use those to create
the electromagnetic whatever?
Copy !req
1034. Yeah, yeah, yeah,
we could get them to explode.
Copy !req
1035. That would fry their chips,
for sure.
Copy !req
1036. You could connect
the transformers.
Copy !req
1037. We just need to put something metal
between them.
Copy !req
1038. You get a nice power boost.
Right up until they overload and blow up.
Copy !req
1039. It only happened once!
Copy !req
1040. That's it.
Copy !req
1041. This should work.
Copy !req
1042. Alan?
Copy !req
1043. Alan!
Copy !req
1044. Whatever you're thinking, forget it.
You're not going out there.
Copy !req
1045. - There's no time!
- It's too dangerous.
Copy !req
1046. - We've only got one chance!
- You are my responsibility...
Copy !req
1047. - and I'm not about to let you go.
- Dad, there's no other way!
Copy !req
1048. You have to trust me.
Copy !req
1049. Wait!
Copy !req
1050. - It's dark in here.
- It's night, genius.
Copy !req
1051. I mean, power has to be going through
the transformers for them to overload.
Copy !req
1052. The power's on at my house
and we've tons of crap to turn on.
Copy !req
1053. We have to wedge the breakers
open in your fuse box.
Copy !req
1054. - Come on, Larry.
- I hate you, Irwin.
Copy !req
1055. We have met the enemy
and he is you!
Copy !req
1056. Shit!
Copy !req
1057. I love the smell of polyurethane
in the morning.
Copy !req
1058. Oh, my God.
Phil, in here, in here.
Copy !req
1059. It's locked!
Copy !req
1060. Up! UP, Up.
Copy !req
1061. - Balcony's closed.
- Down, down, down.
Copy !req
1062. Descend and destroy.
Copy !req
1063. Oh, hi, honey.
Copy !req
1064. Let me in. Damn it!
Fimple, you freak! Let me in!
Copy !req
1065. All quiet on
the Western front yard!
Copy !req
1066. Go and turn on every piece
of electronic equipment in your house.
Copy !req
1067. This one's for Nick Nitro!
Copy !req
1068. - Mess around with my kid, huh?
- Oh, a broomstick. I'm scared.
Copy !req
1069. Get him!
Copy !req
1070. First blood!
Copy !req
1071. Yes, stick this in your pipe
and smoke it!
Copy !req
1072. Alright, Dad!
Copy !req
1073. We roasted them!
Copy !req
1074. There they are.
Nail 'em!
Copy !req
1075. Not good.
Copy !req
1076. Hey, kid!
Don't you like Nine Inch nails?
Copy !req
1077. I got hit.
I'm okay. I'm okay.
Copy !req
1078. - Gorgonites, we must help Alan.
- But if we fight, we will lose.
Copy !req
1079. Last time we fought,
I woke up with AM/FM.
Copy !req
1080. War is nuts.
I know what I'm talking about.
Copy !req
1081. We shouldn't fight.
We should hide.
Copy !req
1082. If we hide,
we will still lose.
Copy !req
1083. No more hiding.
Copy !req
1084. - Nail them to the wall!
- Oh yeah!
Copy !req
1085. Gorgonites, fight!
Copy !req
1086. Sanctuary! Sanctuary!
Copy !req
1087. - Strike!
- Retreat!
Copy !req
1088. Hey! Meet my wife, the old ball and chain.
I love working in the round.
Copy !req
1089. I'm knocking 'em dead.
You don't like stand-up? Then sit down!
Copy !req
1090. Thank you and good night,
ladies and germs.
Copy !req
1091. How do you work this? Wrong way.
That's better.
Copy !req
1092. Alan...
Copy !req
1093. You should go now.
Copy !req
1094. Archer, listen.
Copy !req
1095. When that thing explodes,
you'll be fried, too.
Copy !req
1096. Go.
Copy !req
1097. Take that!
Copy !req
1098. Watch your back.
Copy !req
1099. Thanks, Dad.
Copy !req
1100. Go, Alan!
Copy !req
1101. I'm watching your back, Alan.
Copy !req
1102. - What are you packing, Tiny?
- Packing? I'm packing you!
Copy !req
1103. It's not a prank call.
It's not.
Copy !req
1104. No, wait. It is!
Copy !req
1105. So you'll send some cops
to come and arrest me?
Copy !req
1106. Oh no, don't hang up!
Copy !req
1107. - Do you know what you're doing?
- Yeah...
Copy !req
1108. Die!
Copy !req
1109. Ain't war hell?
Copy !req
1110. Thanks for the lift,
Punch-It.
Copy !req
1111. Mayday! Mayday!
I'm hit!
Copy !req
1112. Rm 90mg down!
Ejecting!
Copy !req
1113. Expect no mercy.
Copy !req
1114. Having fun yet?
Copy !req
1115. Let's have a round and a round
of applause for Archer...
Copy !req
1116. emissary of the Gorgonites.
You're up!
Copy !req
1117. Major Chip Hazard.
Copy !req
1118. Gorgonite scum!
Copy !req
1119. Leave Alan alone.
Your fight is with me.
Copy !req
1120. You've got a lot of guts.
Let's see what they look like.
Copy !req
1121. They're wires and metal,
the same as yours.
Copy !req
1122. We're nothing alike.
You are programmed to lose.
Copy !req
1123. I'm also programmed to learn.
Copy !req
1124. Too bad
you never learned to win.
Copy !req
1125. School's out, loser.
Copy !req
1126. - Victory is ours!
- Have I got a shock for you.
Copy !req
1127. You stupid toy!
Copy !req
1128. Run for it! Watch out!
Copy !req
1129. Get on!
Copy !req
1130. Is this going to be a pattern
for our relationship?
Copy !req
1131. Relationship?
Copy !req
1132. - This isn't dangerous, is it?
- Well, it just depends on...
Copy !req
1133. It's dead!
Copy !req
1134. - Are you alright?
- Yes!
Copy !req
1135. Medic!
Copy !req
1136. There will be no mercy...
Copy !req
1137. Situation is stabilizing.
Local law enforcement is under control.
Copy !req
1138. It's just a matter of compensating
those involved.
Copy !req
1139. The area is secure.
Bring him in.
Copy !req
1140. Who is that?
Copy !req
1141. Oh, no... It's him.
Copy !req
1142. How you doing... Joe?
Copy !req
1143. - Would you do me a big favor?
- Anything, sir.
Copy !req
1144. Move your truck with the giant GloboTech
logo before the news crews get here.
Copy !req
1145. I don't know, Mr. Mars,
I may have trouble handling the gears.
Copy !req
1146. What with the critical head injury
ancl emotional distress I've suffered lately.
Copy !req
1147. - Thank you.
- Right away, sir!
Copy !req
1148. Excuse me.
You're not off the hook yet.
Copy !req
1149. There's the matter of the massive damage
to my home, my garage...
Copy !req
1150. my audio-visual system...
Copy !req
1151. - This is good.
- Bye-bye.
Copy !req
1152. Excuse me, Mr. Whoever-You-Are.
What about our house?
Copy !req
1153. What about the pain
and the anguish and...
Copy !req
1154. - the humiliation?
- Humiliation.
Copy !req
1155. I don't think even you
have enough money to pay for that.
Copy !req
1156. Okay, maybe you do.
Copy !req
1157. - Hey, Alan. Keep your nose clean, kid.
- I'll try. Listen...
Copy !req
1158. I just wanted to say
I'm sorry.
Copy !req
1159. Forget it.
Copy !req
1160. Toys is hell.
Copy !req
1161. Mr. Mars, I just wanted
to assure you that...
Copy !req
1162. take full responsibility
for this.
Copy !req
1163. Yeah, right.
Give me that.
Copy !req
1164. - What were we charging for these?
- $79.95.
Copy !req
1165. I tell you what:
Add a few zeros to the end of that number...
Copy !req
1166. and contact
our military division.
Copy !req
1167. I know some South American rebels
who will find these toys very entertaining.
Copy !req
1168. Dad, you know,
on my birthday...
Copy !req
1169. - I just want clothes.
- Come on, Christy.
Copy !req
1170. - Any sign of the Gorgonites?
- No, none of them.
Copy !req
1171. - Come on, Christy.
- I better go.
Copy !req
1172. Yeah, okay...
Copy !req
1173. Too bad...
This would have made a hell of a commercial.
Copy !req
1174. Archer?
Copy !req
1175. Archer, are you alright?
Copy !req
1176. Halt! Who goes there?
Copy !req
1177. Greetings.
I am Archer, emissary of the Gorgonites.
Copy !req
1178. Greetings.
I am Archer, emissary of the Gorgonites.
Copy !req
1179. Oh, man...
Copy !req
1180. Your chip got fried,
just like the Commandos'.
Copy !req
1181. The Commandos are dead?
Copy !req
1182. Gorgonites, we won.
Copy !req
1183. We did?
Copy !req
1184. Well,
that's a pleasant surprise.
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1185. The satellite dish
must have shielded you guys.
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1186. - Pretty smart.
- Smart? We were lucky!
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1187. - I'm glad you made it, Archer.
- I'm glad you made it, Alan.
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1188. - Alright, I'm serious.
- Gorgonites, we are free!
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1189. Thank you, Alan,
destroyer of Commandos.
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1190. - We're free.
- Free? What about the cover charge?
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1191. Let me get in first.
I'm big.
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1192. I'll sit in the crow's nest.
Hey, there's a dead crow up here.
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1193. I'm kidding.
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1194. Okay...
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1195. - Are you sure you want to do this?
- Yes, Alan. It is time.
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1196. Archer, I understand why, but...
you may not find Gorgon.
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1197. - It may not even...
- Alan...
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1198. Even if you can't see something,
it doesn't mean it isn't there.
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1199. Look, we're out to launch!
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1200. I'm seasick already.
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1201. Bye-bye, Alan.
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1202. Bye-bye, Alan.
Nice knowing you.
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1203. Anybody from out of town here?
Where are you from, sir?
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1204. - Gorgon.
- Oh yeah? What exit?
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1205. Hello? Is this thing on?
Is this a boat or an oil painting?
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1206. I hope we don't hit an iceberg.
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1207. Nuclear warhead?
What are you talking about?
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1208. - Cut.
- Was that too much?
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1209. Like Phil.
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1210. I've never heard you
say that before.
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