1. There she is!Copy !req
2. Gloria!Copy !req
3. Hi.Copy !req
4. Welcome!Copy !req
5. - You look great.
- Thank you!Copy !req
6. - Darcy, where have you been?
- Hey! Hi!Copy !req
7. I was just taking a minute.
Is that allowed?Copy !req
8. Not at your wedding.Copy !req
9. - Your Ketel One martini.
- Oh.Copy !req
10. Obrigada, Jerome.Copy !req
11. Where is the groomzilla?Copy !req
12. Tom is not a groomzilla, okay?Copy !req
13. He just committed to making
every detail perfect.Copy !req
14. You should have taken your father's money
for this wedding.Copy !req
15. Then, professionals would make
everything perfecto for you.Copy !req
16. Mom, I've told you. We are adultsCopy !req
17. and we wanted to pay for our own wedding
so it could be what we wanted.Copy !req
18. And this is what you wanted?Copy !req
19. That was a printing error.Copy !req
20. Hoy!Copy !req
21. Oh! Oh!Copy !req
22. Oh! Hey!Copy !req
23. Oh, I almost shoot you!Copy !req
24. I thought you're a pirate
but you're just a guy.Copy !req
25. Ah, this is for your bride, huh?Copy !req
26. Yeah, trying to surprise her.Copy !req
27. I saw something just like it on Etsy,Copy !req
28. and it looked perfect,
but now I'm not so sure.Copy !req
29. Now, I wanna be romantic
but not too corny.Copy !req
30. There's a really fine line
between the two.Copy !req
31. Aren't you supposed to be over there?Copy !req
32. Your rehearsal party.Copy !req
33. Oh, my God!Copy !req
34. I need you to talk
to your father's yoga teacher.Copy !req
35. - Girlfriend?
- Yeah, whatever.Copy !req
36. She keeps smiling at me.Copy !req
37. Can you tell her to stop smiling at me?Copy !req
38. Yes, Mom.Copy !req
39. I will tell Dad's girlfriend
to stop smiling at you.Copy !req
40. That won't cause any issues.Copy !req
41. Also, I cannot sit at a table
with Tom's mother.Copy !req
42. On the boat here, she tried to start
a sing-along to South Pacific.Copy !req
43. She's excited. Okay?Copy !req
44. She's never been out
of the country before.Copy !req
45. What kind of a grown woman
has never left the country?Copy !req
46. Please, Mom, for two days,
can you just get along with...Copy !req
47. Carol!Copy !req
48. I've been looking forward to this momentCopy !req
49. ever since baby Tommy
was cut out of my abdomen.Copy !req
50. Oh, my God,Copy !req
51. I have never been
on a private island before.Copy !req
52. I've never been even on an island before.Copy !req
53. Actually, you know what? That's not true.Copy !req
54. I went with the Heibermans.
We went to Mackinac, you know,Copy !req
55. before they moved to Bloomington.Copy !req
56. Have you ever been to Mackinac, Renata?Copy !req
57. I don't know what that is
or most of the words you just said.Copy !req
58. Wouldn't she just love it, Larry?Copy !req
59. Oh. Hi, Darcy.Copy !req
60. Hey, Larry.Copy !req
61. I didn't see you there.Copy !req
62. - Hi.
- Hi, Renata.Copy !req
63. Guess what? We got you a gift.Copy !req
64. - Oh, you didn't have to.
- Yes, we did.Copy !req
65. It's the biggest day
of our lives tomorrow.Copy !req
66. What are you talking about?Copy !req
67. - Come on, open it.
- Okay.Copy !req
68. - Larry, she's opening.
- I get... Oh.Copy !req
69. Ah-uh-huh.Copy !req
70. Oh. Someone just left that
in the bathroom.Copy !req
71. Oh, you're a lifesaver, Margy.Copy !req
72. I cannot believe I'm late for this.Copy !req
73. The guests are already mingling,Copy !req
74. and your Darcy is talking
to both the mothers.Copy !req
75. Oh, no. Go. Go, go, go, go, go, go.Copy !req
76. Oh!Copy !req
77. You got my daughter rusty knives?Copy !req
78. It's your "something borrowed."Copy !req
79. Everyone in our family uses
them on their wedding day.Copy !req
80. Brings you a lifetime of good luck.Copy !req
81. Except for Uncle GregCopy !req
82. who ended up getting
decapitated on that forklift.Copy !req
83. But that's not the knife's fault.Copy !req
84. Darcy!Copy !req
85. Dad!Copy !req
86. - Gracias.
- Mm.Copy !req
87. Carol, you look lovely.Copy !req
88. Mm. Mm.Copy !req
89. Larry, hello, sir.Copy !req
90. - Hey!
- I'm gonna kiss you too.Copy !req
91. - Oh.
- Mm.Copy !req
92. - Sorry. Done?
- Yeah, okay.Copy !req
93. Renata.Copy !req
94. Roberto.Copy !req
95. I love that you two are still friends.Copy !req
96. - Peekaboo!
- Oh.Copy !req
97. Hi!Copy !req
98. Mwah. Mwah.Copy !req
99. Mm!Copy !req
100. Oh, Darcy, I am so honored to bear witnessCopy !req
101. to this sacred observance
of rebirth and devotion.Copy !req
102. - Same.
- Thank you.Copy !req
103. Renata.Copy !req
104. I need to go to the ladies' room.Copy !req
105. Hey, me too.Copy !req
106. When I'm in formal wear,
I like to pee standing up. How about you?Copy !req
107. - Sorry.
- That's okay.Copy !req
108. Thank you, Margy.Copy !req
109. Oh, hey.Copy !req
110. - Hey.
- How are you?Copy !req
111. - Oh.
- Oh, my God.Copy !req
112. - That's for you.
- Thanks.Copy !req
113. Big papi.Copy !req
114. My man. Mwah.Copy !req
115. - This... I just...
- Nice to see you, Dad.Copy !req
116. - Señor.
- Let's just, uh, stickCopy !req
117. with "Robert" for a little while.Copy !req
118. - Right. Robert.
- Tom, I heardCopy !req
119. you were the one who found
this incredible resort.Copy !req
120. - Yeah. I did.
- Yes.Copy !req
121. I actually study bioresonance,
and this place isCopy !req
122. teeming with energetic vibrations.Copy !req
123. - Mm.
- It's just likeCopy !req
124. our room teeming with bugs.Copy !req
125. The, uh, Four Seasons would've been nice,
but you didn't want my help, so...Copy !req
126. Some things are more importantCopy !req
127. - than money, Dad.
- Yeah.Copy !req
128. That's debatable.Copy !req
129. Well, I need another drink.Copy !req
130. Yeah.Copy !req
131. No, I'm good. Gracias.Copy !req
132. Okay, well...Copy !req
133. I'm fine.Copy !req
134. Is he ever gonna like me?Copy !req
135. Yes, if you just chill out
and start acting like yourself.Copy !req
136. God, our families are a lot.Copy !req
137. - What do you mean?
- And where have you been?Copy !req
138. I was just finishing up a little project.Copy !req
139. What'd I miss?Copy !req
140. Oh, well, your mom gave me cursed knives.Copy !req
141. And then my mom almost yelled
at my dad's girlfriend for smiling.Copy !req
142. - Oh.
- Oh, also,Copy !req
143. your cousin, Amy, asked where
she could charge her vibrator.Copy !req
144. Oh, so, Cousin Amy came?Copy !req
145. She will soon.Copy !req
146. Um, what are you wearing?Copy !req
147. Oh, it's, uh...Copy !req
148. Why is your hair all wet?Copy !req
149. Oh, I... I just... I...Copy !req
150. You know, I went
for a little moonlight swim.Copy !req
151. You fell in the water, didn't you?Copy !req
152. Yeah, I fell in the water.Copy !req
153. You know, it's kinda cute
how bad you are at lying.Copy !req
154. Just... Just promise me...Copy !req
155. Promise me, you won't let go of my hand
for the rest of the night, okay?Copy !req
156. I promise.Copy !req
157. Ace.Copy !req
158. Ace just put on the honeymoon play list.
I need to change it.Copy !req
159. Well, is "need" the right word?Copy !req
160. - Dad, please.
- Oh, yeah.Copy !req
161. Tommy, Tommy, I need you
for, like, five minutes.Copy !req
162. - What? No, no, no, no.
- It's an emergency.Copy !req
163. I've been working
on my best-man speech, right,Copy !req
164. and it is going really well.Copy !req
165. - Hi.
- Hey.Copy !req
166. Dad's girlfriend just asked me
what my love language is.Copy !req
167. She sucks.Copy !req
168. Happiest I've seen you in 20 years.Copy !req
169. - Thanks.
- Cheers.Copy !req
170. Dad invited your ex?Copy !req
171. God! How does he just keep getting hotter?Copy !req
172. Looks like he's leading a porn safari.Copy !req
173. I didn't wanna invite him,Copy !req
174. but Dad insisted because
he said Bali was so close.Copy !req
175. Wow. Wow, wow, wow. Wow, wow.Copy !req
176. Dad is a messy bitch who loves the drama.Copy !req
177. Well, he never RSVP'd,
so we thought we were in the clear.Copy !req
178. I didn't think he'd actually come.
You know, he never RSVP'd.Copy !req
179. No, that's a very, very cool move.
I'm really excited to meet him.Copy !req
180. Oops, looks like he was in a rushCopy !req
181. and forgot to button
his shirt all the way up.Copy !req
182. Deedee.Copy !req
183. - Hey, man, how are you?
- Hey.Copy !req
184. Hi, Sean!Copy !req
185. I am so sorry that I'm late.Copy !req
186. Your dad needed me to go to Japan
at the last minute,Copy !req
187. and then, you know,
I had to charter a jet from Kyoto,Copy !req
188. - just like a whole thing.
- No, it's okay. We just...Copy !req
189. You know, we didn't know you were coming.Copy !req
190. Your dad and I
wanted to surprise you.Copy !req
191. Look, babe, you know I wasn't
gonna miss your weddingCopy !req
192. for anything in this world, right?Copy !req
193. - Sean, I want you to meet Tom.
- Tom.Copy !req
194. - Oh, hey!
- Tom!Copy !req
195. - Tom, Tom, Tom.
- Sean. Yeah.Copy !req
196. - Nice to meet you.
- Hey, Tom.Copy !req
197. Man, I have been dying
to meet Deedee's ball player, man.Copy !req
198. What position you play?Copy !req
199. - I'm a... Well, I...
- He's a designated hitter.Copy !req
200. Uh, unfortunately,
they didn't pick up his contract,Copy !req
201. so, technically, he's unemployed, but...Copy !req
202. Cut from the minors at 40.Copy !req
203. That's a tough break, Tom.
But if you stay positive,Copy !req
204. you could have
a really great future in coaching.Copy !req
205. You know what I mean?Copy !req
206. Yeah.Copy !req
207. That is an excellent idea.Copy !req
208. - I think so.
- Thank you.Copy !req
209. Yeah.Copy !req
210. Is it time for dinner?Copy !req
211. We are so very touched
that you all made the trek out here.Copy !req
212. You know, we really wanted to pick a place
that was convenient for none of you.Copy !req
213. You know what,
I talk too much at the law firm.Copy !req
214. So I am going to hand it over
to the man of the hour,Copy !req
215. the guy who made
this whole weekend happen,Copy !req
216. my lovely Tom.Copy !req
217. Thank you.Copy !req
218. - Do it!
- You go, girl!Copy !req
219. Uh...Copy !req
220. - Yeah!
- You got this.Copy !req
221. Right?Copy !req
222. I can just wing this, right?Copy !req
223. Darcy talked a lot about, uh,
her time in the Peace Corps in Bali,Copy !req
224. and I thought, you know,Copy !req
225. how cool would it be
if we got married there.Copy !req
226. And then, I realized that
Bali was un-Bali-vably expensive.Copy !req
227. I think the Philippines are better.Copy !req
228. Right, Ace?Copy !req
229. Ace agrees. Next.Copy !req
230. Aw!Copy !req
231. I know a lot of you were there
to witness my proposal.Copy !req
232. The shock and surprise. Priceless.Copy !req
233. Anyway, Mom and Dad,
I just wanna say thank you.Copy !req
234. Your commitment is something
that we can only aspire to.Copy !req
235. - Oh, my God.
- Robert, Renata,Copy !req
236. we hope our marriage is
nothing like yours.Copy !req
237. Pivot, baby. Pivot.Copy !req
238. I mean, that's not a...
a character judgment, by any means.Copy !req
239. I mean, 50% of marriages
end in divorce, right?Copy !req
240. Ha! Wonderful.Copy !req
241. Cheers, everybody.Copy !req
242. - Cheers, cheers, cheers.
- Cheers.Copy !req
243. Oh, my God. That did not go well.Copy !req
244. No, that was awesome.Copy !req
245. So Deedee and I met
in the Peace Corps in Bali.Copy !req
246. And one day, we had to run
these medical supplies to this village.Copy !req
247. I decided to teach her
how to drive the boat,Copy !req
248. so I could sleep
and she could do all the work.Copy !req
249. The first time our girl
gets behind the wheel,Copy !req
250. she gets a damn speeding ticket
from the coast guard.Copy !req
251. Right? Deedee doesn't do
anything half-assed.Copy !req
252. She sees what she wants,Copy !req
253. she goes after it,
and she doesn't settle for less.Copy !req
254. It's true, it's true.Copy !req
255. So, as some of you may know,Copy !req
256. Deedee and I were,
100 years ago, were engaged.Copy !req
257. But she called it off.Copy !req
258. No. No, no, no, no.Copy !req
259. She was waiting for Tom.Copy !req
260. And that guy right there
has gotta be a one-in-a-million supernovaCopy !req
261. to snag that beautiful soul.Copy !req
262. Thanks.Copy !req
263. - Thanks, Sean.
- So, in conclusion,Copy !req
264. I just wanna say one thing to you, Deedee.Copy !req
265. Katuk kak ci.Copy !req
266. What's... Katuk kak what?Copy !req
267. Oh, God. Um, it's hard to explain.Copy !req
268. It actually means, um,Copy !req
269. "Fuck your grandpa."
It's just...Copy !req
270. Well, that's not that hard to explain.Copy !req
271. Yeah, well, I don't know.
Just, in Balinese, it's super offensive.Copy !req
272. Yeah, well, it's offensive everywhere, no?Copy !req
273. - Yeah. I mean... It just...
- "Fuck your grandpa!"Copy !req
274. - It just made us laugh.
- It is funny.Copy !req
275. Hi, everybody.Copy !req
276. I'm Tom's baby sister, Jeannie.Copy !req
277. - Yeah, Jeannie!
- Hey, Jeannie!Copy !req
278. Wow, Sean's speech, wasn't it somethin'?Copy !req
279. Honey?Copy !req
280. Maybe we should just,
you know, call it a night.Copy !req
281. No, babe, you go ahead.Copy !req
282. I gotta finish these centerpieces
and rearrange the seating chartCopy !req
283. now that Sean decided to show up.Copy !req
284. Tom!Copy !req
285. Tom!Copy !req
286. Let's have sex.Copy !req
287. Yes. Yes.Copy !req
288. Just... Just... Just...
Just gimme... Just...Copy !req
289. I just have to finish
these pineapples real quick.Copy !req
290. Okay. Um...Copy !req
291. But do you really have to finish
pineapples right now?Copy !req
292. Oh, my God. I love you
in a T-shirt and no pants.Copy !req
293. I'm just gonna reach over here,Copy !req
294. this high shelf, so I can get
something to read.Copy !req
295. Why is it so sexy
when you can't reach high shelves?Copy !req
296. So, um...Copy !req
297. I'm sorry, miss, but it was...Copy !req
298. - It's this one here?
- No, no, no.Copy !req
299. It's the one over there.Copy !req
300. - Sir, please.
- Oh, this one.Copy !req
301. - This one.
- Yes.Copy !req
302. - That?
- Thank you, sir.Copy !req
303. Okay. Glad I could help.Copy !req
304. I miss you.Copy !req
305. It's been a while, huh?Copy !req
306. I know.Copy !req
307. I miss you.Copy !req
308. Could I ask you a question?Copy !req
309. Is it a sexy question?Copy !req
310. Um...Copy !req
311. Just wondering why you called off
the engagement with Sean again.Copy !req
312. That is so not sexy.Copy !req
313. I... I told you this.Copy !req
314. We were young, we were in Bali,Copy !req
315. and then one day, I woke up
and it just didn't feel right.Copy !req
316. - Okay?
- Okay.Copy !req
317. But you said yes.Copy !req
318. You know, what changed your mind?Copy !req
319. I don't know.Copy !req
320. Uh, he... he started working with my dad,Copy !req
321. he changed, and all he cared about
was status and money.Copy !req
322. Anyway, why do you want
to talk about my exCopy !req
323. the night before our wedding?Copy !req
324. I don't know. Maybe because
you invited him to our wedding?Copy !req
325. Remember, I didn't.Copy !req
326. My dad asked me to invite him.
What was I supposed to say?Copy !req
327. I don't know. Uh, no?Copy !req
328. If you remember correctly,
I didn't wanna invite anyone.Copy !req
329. I wanted to elope.Copy !req
330. The only reason I agreed
to a traditional weddingCopy !req
331. was because you said that
we'd have moments alone.Copy !req
332. Hey, hello. It's Carol.Copy !req
333. Hi. Hello.Copy !req
334. Your future mother-in-law, Carol.Copy !req
335. Yep, I know your name, Carol.Copy !req
336. I brought some of the extras
for the welcome bagsCopy !req
337. in case you want to make one for Sean.Copy !req
338. Oh! Oh.Copy !req
339. Great. Thanks.Copy !req
340. All right, thanks.Copy !req
341. Tommy, she's not wearing any pants.Copy !req
342. I just want to ask,Copy !req
343. and... and I hope it's okay.Copy !req
344. Is that genetics,Copy !req
345. or is it, like, Pilates or something?Copy !req
346. Mom, now is not the time for this.Copy !req
347. Yes, all right. But, you know,
we need to get you outta here.Copy !req
348. It's the night before your wedding,
and you can't spend the night together.Copy !req
349. - No, Ma, it's just...
- You can't. It's bad luck.Copy !req
350. You know, his cousin, Jenna,
she spent the night with her husband.Copy !req
351. Lo and behold, she got Lyme disease,
and now she can't wear sandals.Copy !req
352. It's a tradition.Copy !req
353. Oh.
Look at the happy couple.Copy !req
354. Where have you been?Copy !req
355. You were supposed to do my hair.Copy !req
356. Now birds are gonna lay eggs in it.Copy !req
357. I know. I overslept. I'm sorry.Copy !req
358. Kind of, sort of,
slept with Ricky last night.Copy !req
359. - Ricky?
- Yes. I'm sorry.Copy !req
360. I just, I was in the mood for something,
you know, that wasn't quite right.Copy !req
361. Like ordering a hamburger
at a sushi bar or something.Copy !req
362. I'm just gonna avoid him today. It's fine.Copy !req
363. He's Tom's best man.Copy !req
364. You two have to walk down
the aisle together.Copy !req
365. I am very good at ignoring people
that I'm standing next to.Copy !req
366. - No kidding.
- Ready?Copy !req
367. I can't believe you agreed
to wear Carol's wedding dress.Copy !req
368. Okay.Copy !req
369. Okay, okay.Copy !req
370. You look beautiful, no matter what.Copy !req
371. She's ready!Copy !req
372. Hey, should we all doCopy !req
373. a round of tequila shots?Copy !req
374. Well, I Scotchgarded the dress,
so try not to inhale the chemicals.Copy !req
375. Where's the veil?
Where's the veil?Copy !req
376. Okay.Copy !req
377. Well, yes, tequila.Copy !req
378. Unless we get the bottle,
I'm not set.Copy !req
379. No, no tequila.Copy !req
380. Oh!Copy !req
381. The prettiest of them all.Copy !req
382. You look so much better
than the rest of us.Copy !req
383. This dress is just wonderful.Copy !req
384. I wore it for my wedding,Copy !req
385. Jeannie wore it for hers,
and now you're gonna wear it for yours.Copy !req
386. Oh, my gosh.Copy !req
387. Look at you.Copy !req
388. Oh, it's white coral made out of tissue.Copy !req
389. Um...Copy !req
390. Something doesn't, you know, feel right.Copy !req
391. Do you think
if we blew-dried the veil,Copy !req
392. - it would be more fluffy?
- Okay, so what I'm seeing is,Copy !req
393. I think that the left boob
is actually slightly lowerCopy !req
394. - than the right boob.
- Like floof, floof, like that?Copy !req
395. Hey, something kinda magical
happened with me last night.Copy !req
396. Theoretically speaking...Copy !req
397. would it be weird or wonderfulCopy !req
398. if we married sisters?Copy !req
399. Yeah, sure.Copy !req
400. Hey, psst, Larry.
Tom's being boring.Copy !req
401. Come film me doing a back flip!Copy !req
402. Oh, I...
I don't think I should walk.Copy !req
403. All right.Copy !req
404. It's time.Copy !req
405. Wow!Copy !req
406. Look at you.Copy !req
407. Okay.Copy !req
408. You wanted to talk.Copy !req
409. I know it's last minute.Copy !req
410. I just...Copy !req
411. I hated the way things ended
last night, and...Copy !req
412. And I didn't want our wedding day
to start off on a bad note.Copy !req
413. Oh, my God.Copy !req
414. God, I thought you were calling it off.Copy !req
415. Calling off the wedding?Copy !req
416. - Why?
- Uh, I don't know.Copy !req
417. I mean, this weekend
hasn't exactly gone to plan.Copy !req
418. You and I have been arguing more
in the last few months than we didCopy !req
419. our first four years together.Copy !req
420. I don't know.
I guess I thoughtCopy !req
421. weddings were supposed to be fun.Copy !req
422. Oh. Okay.Copy !req
423. Well, I'm sorry I didn't make
your wedding more fun for you.Copy !req
424. Well, no. That's...
Darcy, that's not what...Copy !req
425. And it's not my wedding. It's our wedding.Copy !req
426. Hardly.Copy !req
427. Yeah, Tom.Copy !req
428. You got so fixated
on the wedding that you...Copy !req
429. you turned into a different person.Copy !req
430. I'm sorry. I just wanted
everything to be perfect.Copy !req
431. Why is that so important to you?Copy !req
432. Why isn't it important to you?Copy !req
433. It's like you don't even care
about the wedding.Copy !req
434. Well, I... Of course I care.Copy !req
435. Oh, yeah?Copy !req
436. You're the one that insisted
that we pay for this wedding.Copy !req
437. Yet I'm the one that's bargainingCopy !req
438. with all the vendors
and DIY-ing everything,Copy !req
439. and all you're saying is,
"I don't know. It looks good,"Copy !req
440. you know, "Sounds good, Tom.
Whatever you want."Copy !req
441. I told you that I did not want
a big traditional wedding.Copy !req
442. Okay? I'm not some blushing bride.
I'm a grown woman.Copy !req
443. I don't want my daddy
walking me down the aisle.Copy !req
444. I don't need a big princess dress,Copy !req
445. and I certainly don't need
a wedding registry.Copy !req
446. I have my things already.
I like my things.Copy !req
447. I wanted a Roomba.Copy !req
448. Well, she's not up in the lobby.Copy !req
449. I can't get through on my phone.Copy !req
450. Oh, my God. They've fallen in a ditch.Copy !req
451. What? And how do you know that?Copy !req
452. I don't know.Copy !req
453. I just have a sixth sense
about these things.Copy !req
454. Ace and I will take a look around.Copy !req
455. Don't worry. We will find them.Copy !req
456. - Check all ditches!
- God.Copy !req
457. I wanted it to just be you and me
in the middle of the ocean.Copy !req
458. And for the 400th time,
that would've killed my mother.Copy !req
459. Ugh. Right.Copy !req
460. And that's why I'm in your mother's dressCopy !req
461. with an extra 10 pounds of hair
on my head.Copy !req
462. But the truth is, you have not listened
to one thing I wanted since you proposed.Copy !req
463. Okay, well, Darcy, I'm listening.
Enlighten me.Copy !req
464. What is it? What is it that you want?Copy !req
465. Tom, we've... We talked about this.Copy !req
466. I told you on our very first date,
I didn't want a big wedding.Copy !req
467. Well, I thought you changedCopy !req
468. your mind about that.Copy !req
469. Why did you even agree to do it then?Copy !req
470. Oh, I... I don't... I don't know!Copy !req
471. Okay? Because...Copy !req
472. Because I love you. Because I... I w...Copy !req
473. I wanted you to be happy.Copy !req
474. Go! Come on, move!Copy !req
475. Everybody, move! Come on!Copy !req
476. Move along.Copy !req
477. Go outside, go outside right now.
Come on. Come on.Copy !req
478. If you don't wanna go through with this,Copy !req
479. it's not too late.Copy !req
480. What?Copy !req
481. No. We brought everybody that we loved
down to the Philippines for our wedding.Copy !req
482. I'm in this dress! We're doin' this!Copy !req
483. Oh, that was beautiful.
Are those your vows?Copy !req
484. Oh, my God.Copy !req
485. You convinced yourself
that I wanted to call off the wedding,Copy !req
486. and now you're making it happen.Copy !req
487. Oh, there you go. Lawyering yourself
out of any real responsibility.Copy !req
488. You cut me with your ring!Copy !req
489. Won't happen again.Copy !req
490. Great!Copy !req
491. Why don't you go be with Sean?Copy !req
492. Maybe you guys could go bang
some grandpas!Copy !req
493. I don't know why.
I have a bad feeling about this.Copy !req
494. It's gonna be fine, honey.Copy !req
495. I think you might be overreacting.Copy !req
496. Hold still!
Get down, get down, get down!Copy !req
497. No running!Copy !req
498. - Everyone!
- Get down.Copy !req
499. To the pool! Now!Copy !req
500. First rows, go!Copy !req
501. Go, go, go!Copy !req
502. Everyone, this way! This way!Copy !req
503. Come on! Come on! One line! Let's go!Copy !req
504. Let's go!Copy !req
505. Darcy.Copy !req
506. - Guys, go!
- Go, go, up there.Copy !req
507. Up there!
Up there! Go! Go to the end.Copy !req
508. - Go, go!
- Everybody, walk!Copy !req
509. - Keep going.
- Let's go.Copy !req
510. Go!Copy !req
511. Keep moving! There you go.Copy !req
512. Turn. Turn. Go!Copy !req
513. - Line up.
- Keep moving.Copy !req
514. Line up, go!Copy !req
515. - Now!
- No.Copy !req
516. And into the pool.Copy !req
517. Now. Go!Copy !req
518. Go in. Faster, faster, faster.Copy !req
519. - Get in the water.
- Let's go faster.Copy !req
520. - Drop the phone.
- But my phone will get ruined.Copy !req
521. I think that's the point, sweetie.
Just drop it.Copy !req
522. Yeah, but I haven't
backed it up in a while.Copy !req
523. - Drop it!
- Okay. Okay.Copy !req
524. No need to be scared.Copy !req
525. As long as everybody follows directions,
no one gets hurt.Copy !req
526. Raise your hand when you hear your name.Copy !req
527. Robert Rivera.Copy !req
528. Robert! Robert.Copy !req
529. They're calling you.Copy !req
530. Thanks a lot, Carol.Copy !req
531. - Larry Fowler.
- Present.Copy !req
532. I... I'm Carol, his wife.Copy !req
533. Just so you don't have to make two trips.Copy !req
534. Wait, wait. I'd like it in the center.Copy !req
535. Sean Hawkins.Copy !req
536. If you hurt anyone in this pool,
you're gonna have to answer to me.Copy !req
537. Is this the hero of the group?Copy !req
538. Yes.Copy !req
539. No. Oh, my God.Copy !req
540. There is always one.Copy !req
541. All right.Copy !req
542. Where is bride and groom?Copy !req
543. She's there.
Isn't she the bride?Copy !req
544. Oh. No.Copy !req
545. Amanda thought it was appropriate
to wear white to a wedding.Copy !req
546. I didn't know that was a rule.Copy !req
547. Yes, you did.Copy !req
548. - You're a gas lighter.
- Yeah.Copy !req
549. You see, this is a problem.Copy !req
550. They could call police.
And if police come,Copy !req
551. we kill everyone.Copy !req
552. Oh, my God.Copy !req
553. Okay, um, I... I saw Tom headed towards
the nature walk before the ceremony,Copy !req
554. and I noticed that his frequency levels
were dangerously low.Copy !req
555. I think he's getting cold feet.Copy !req
556. Tommy has cold feet?Copy !req
557. Is this really what we should be
worrying about at this point?Copy !req
558. I'm a mother. I can worry
about a lot of things at the same time.Copy !req
559. Like Larry's mole.Copy !req
560. Oh, it's fine, sweetie.Copy !req
561. - It's getting bigger.
- Spread out.Copy !req
562. Look for them.Copy !req
563. Hey, uh, I... I...
I texted you this morningCopy !req
564. and I didn't hear anything back.Copy !req
565. Are you being serious right now?Copy !req
566. No. No.Copy !req
567. Darcy!Copy !req
568. Darcy! Hey!Copy !req
569. No, no, no, no. Darcy.Copy !req
570. - Darcy, I'm coming in.
- Fuck off, Tom!Copy !req
571. Oh, thank God.Copy !req
572. Listen, I know you're mad at me right now,
but you have to let me in.Copy !req
573. Why would I be mad? I'm awesome.Copy !req
574. I'm on a tropical island,
I'm having a liquid brunch,Copy !req
575. and I don't have to answer to anybody!Copy !req
576. Oh, my God, this is not happening.Copy !req
577. Oh, it is happening, buddy.Copy !req
578. Okay? And once I get this hair condo
off my head,Copy !req
579. I'm gonna march down to that beach
and tell everybody how you blew this up!Copy !req
580. Shh... shh!Copy !req
581. Are you seriously shushing me right now?Copy !req
582. What the fuck?Copy !req
583. Is that blood?Copy !req
584. There's no time
for a blood freak-out right now.Copy !req
585. Don't tell me...Copy !req
586. There are pirates outside,Copy !req
587. and they took everybody hostage.Copy !req
588. What?Copy !req
589. - We have to get help.
- No, no. No. No.Copy !req
590. - The phone is dead.
- Oh, the Wi-Fi too.Copy !req
591. Marge said the cell service
is better on the north side.Copy !req
592. Why did you pick an island
with no cell service?Copy !req
593. Because I wanted people to be present
and in the moment.Copy !req
594. Jeez!Copy !req
595. I can't breathe. I can't breathe!Copy !req
596. I know. Me neither.Copy !req
597. No. I... I really can't breathe.
It's the shape wear.Copy !req
598. Please help me get out of this dress now.Copy !req
599. Now!Copy !req
600. Would you relax?Copy !req
601. What did you just say to me?Copy !req
602. I said everything's gonna be okay.Copy !req
603. Dress is like a riddle.Copy !req
604. Oh!Copy !req
605. God, I'm gonna die in this dress!Copy !req
606. Oh, door latches from the inside.Copy !req
607. He's gonna know we're in here.Copy !req
608. He's also gonna know we're in here
when he comes in here and we're in here.Copy !req
609. He'll think we're in the shower.Copy !req
610. What... What?Copy !req
611. And come back at a better time?
Leave a note?Copy !req
612. All right.Copy !req
613. Okay, h... here's the plan. He comes in,
he's gonna think we're in the shower,Copy !req
614. then I jump out and I trap him in the net.Copy !req
615. Oh, my God, that's an amazing plan.Copy !req
616. - Yes!
- No!Copy !req
617. You're gonna throw a net over a pirate?Copy !req
618. Have you ever tried to get out of a net?Copy !req
619. It's very hard to get out of a net.Copy !req
620. Okay. How about...Copy !req
621. How about this? I spray him in the eyes.Copy !req
622. How is hairspray in the eyes
better than a net over his head?Copy !req
623. Wait! Yes, that's actually...Copy !req
624. That's actually... You spray that.Copy !req
625. I'll light the match.
It'll be like a flamethrower.Copy !req
626. - I mean, it won't work!
- Why?Copy !req
627. - Too many steps.
- It's two steps.Copy !req
628. It's two steps. Flamethrower, net.Copy !req
629. I pop out and I put the net over his head.
I'll surprise him.Copy !req
630. No, Tom, because bullets
shoot through nets!Copy !req
631. - Technically, yeah.
- Technically?Copy !req
632. Technically, he won't be able
to shoot straightCopy !req
633. because he'll be all fuckin'
wrapped up in the net.Copy !req
634. I swear to God, if you say "net"
one more time...Copy !req
635. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. Oh, my God.Copy !req
636. Psst. Flamethrower.Copy !req
637. I'm gonna fuck him up.Copy !req
638. I'm gonna fuck him up.Copy !req
639. Fuck!Copy !req
640. Ow!Copy !req
641. - Never mind! Never mind.
- Why did you do that?Copy !req
642. Never mind!Copy !req
643. You were right.Copy !req
644. That hairspray was
so much worse than the net.Copy !req
645. - Ow!
- Get up.Copy !req
646. Okay.Copy !req
647. - Come on.
- Don't strangle me.Copy !req
648. - Turn your arm.
- I have them alive.Copy !req
649. Wait, wait. What?Copy !req
650. Bungalow 15. Pick me up.Copy !req
651. Go collect them.Copy !req
652. And then we can begin.Copy !req
653. You doing okay, Jamie?Copy !req
654. My stomach feels like
it's gonna fall through my asshole.Copy !req
655. But otherwise, I'm chill.Copy !req
656. Listen, it's normal to feel scared.Copy !req
657. But I'm not gonna let
anything happen to youCopy !req
658. or your family. Promise.Copy !req
659. Hey, Sean?Copy !req
660. I am also feeling scared.Copy !req
661. Like the most scared
I've ever been in my whole life.Copy !req
662. It's like I just watched The Ring,
you know?Copy !req
663. Robbie, baby, I want you
to practice the breathing exerciseCopy !req
664. that we learned at Esalen, okay?Copy !req
665. I'm gonna hit a pressure point.
Ready? And...Copy !req
666. Breathe. Breathe.Copy !req
667. From the diaphragm.Copy !req
668. - I think I'm gonna throw up now.
- It's okay. You're doing fine.Copy !req
669. If he keeps making that noise,
just go ahead and shoot me.Copy !req
670. The happy couple
will be here in a second.Copy !req
671. So let's get to business.Copy !req
672. Where is the father of the bride?Copy !req
673. Robert. He's calling ya again.Copy !req
674. Thanks, Carol.Copy !req
675. Okay, what do you want?Copy !req
676. Well, we call my colleague
on the satellite phone,Copy !req
677. and you transfer $45 million
to a bank account.Copy !req
678. What? What?Copy !req
679. I don't have that kind of money.Copy !req
680. We googled you.
Net worth is $60 million.Copy !req
681. I'm not giving you anything
until I find out if my daughter's safe.Copy !req
682. - And your son-in-law.
- Yeah, him too.Copy !req
683. Okay.Copy !req
684. I can wait two minutes
to take all your money.Copy !req
685. This way.Copy !req
686. You want some pineapple candies?Copy !req
687. They're from that weird welcome bag
we got, but I found them in my pocket.Copy !req
688. No, I don't want loose, wet candy
from your gross pockets.Copy !req
689. Okay.Copy !req
690. Suit yourself.Copy !req
691. Okay. Okay, okay, okay, okay.Copy !req
692. - I'm starving.
- No.Copy !req
693. - You're an asshole.
- Hmm.Copy !req
694. God, I can't believe
that I had sex with you.Copy !req
695. Honestly, I was pretty surprised
by that too.Copy !req
696. My parents, they got divorced
when I was in high school,Copy !req
697. and my first engagement was a disaster.Copy !req
698. What about you? Are you dating anyone?Copy !req
699. Have you always wanted to be a pirate?Copy !req
700. No more talk, lady.Copy !req
701. Excuse me, sirs.Copy !req
702. Darcy, they're gonna hurt you.Copy !req
703. I just can't help but notice
that you guys smell like cigarettes,Copy !req
704. and I am loving it.Copy !req
705. Is there any way I could bum a cigarette?Copy !req
706. I mean, I think it might help with the...Copy !req
707. the panic and dread
I'm experiencing right now.Copy !req
708. Since when do you smoke cigarettes?Copy !req
709. It's...Copy !req
710. I just... You don't even
have to untie my hands.Copy !req
711. I mean, I... I can smoke with no hands.Copy !req
712. You could just put it right in my mouth.Copy !req
713. Give her a cigarette.Copy !req
714. - Please.
- Maybe it will shut her up.Copy !req
715. Yes, yes, yes, it will shut me up.Copy !req
716. Oh, thank you.Copy !req
717. You guys are the...Copy !req
718. best.Copy !req
719. What?Copy !req
720. Fire!Copy !req
721. Oh, my God!Copy !req
722. Oh, my God! Flamethrower!Copy !req
723. Oh, my...Copy !req
724. See, that's why you only have a plan
with one step!Copy !req
725. - No!
- Oh, my God!Copy !req
726. - Get the brakes!
- I'm trying! I'm trying!Copy !req
727. Cliff!Copy !req
728. - Cliff! Cliff!
- I see it!Copy !req
729. Get it into park!Copy !req
730. I'm trying!Copy !req
731. - Oh, God! Oh, my God!
- God!Copy !req
732. Oh, slide out!Copy !req
733. My dress! My dress, Tom!Copy !req
734. Tom, don't let go!Copy !req
735. Don't you let go!Copy !req
736. I'm stuck! I'm stuck!Copy !req
737. Go!Copy !req
738. Go. Go, go, go. Go, go, go.Copy !req
739. Quick, do something baseball-y.Copy !req
740. What? This is nothing like baseball!Copy !req
741. - Down! Down, down!
- Fuck!Copy !req
742. - He's out of ammo.
- Right.Copy !req
743. - Run at him!
- What?Copy !req
744. - Go. Believe me, just go!
- No, no, no!Copy !req
745. - Grenade!
- He has a grenade!Copy !req
746. Sir!Copy !req
747. Sir, sir.Copy !req
748. Give me the grenade, sir. Sir!Copy !req
749. Sir, give me the grenade. Sir. Sir!Copy !req
750. Ah-ow. Ow!Copy !req
751. Oh, my God.Copy !req
752. - Is he dead?
- I don't know.Copy !req
753. Are you dead?Copy !req
754. Oh, yeah, he's very not alive.Copy !req
755. Not alive. Oh, boy.Copy !req
756. - Yes! You killed him!
- Yeah!Copy !req
757. Yeah, I killed him! I killed him!Copy !req
758. Oh, my God, I killed a man.Copy !req
759. I killed a man. No.Copy !req
760. How do you feel?Copy !req
761. I feel... Oh, my God. I feel horrible.Copy !req
762. - Yeah.
- But excited.Copy !req
763. You know, like, happy.
Like, I'm gonna shit my pants.Copy !req
764. - Yeah.
- You know, like,Copy !req
765. but in a good way. You know?Copy !req
766. Huh.Copy !req
767. Oh, my God.Copy !req
768. I'm gonna go to prison.Copy !req
769. - I'm gonna...
- No!Copy !req
770. - Yeah.
- No. It was... It...Copy !req
771. It was self-defense.
He was trying to kill us.Copy !req
772. Any court would...Copy !req
773. Any court...Copy !req
774. Are you okay?Copy !req
775. Yeah. I'm fine. I'm fine.Copy !req
776. It's just, you know, I looked over there
and I saw all the blood.Copy !req
777. And, you know, I think I saw some brain.Copy !req
778. - Was that brain stuff?
- Yeah. Yeah.Copy !req
779. And so I'm just gonna look up at the sky
and... so I don't pass out.Copy !req
780. Okay. Well, you know what?
Maybe we should...Copy !req
781. Let's just step awayCopy !req
782. from the scene.Copy !req
783. - And don't look down.
- Okay.Copy !req
784. - Okay.
- Just don't look down.Copy !req
785. They should be here by now.Copy !req
786. Head up the road.Copy !req
787. - Check on them.
- Yeah.Copy !req
788. All right. We need to get off this island.Copy !req
789. Well, it might help that
I got this grenade for us.Copy !req
790. I mean, he was trying
to blow us up, but I got it.Copy !req
791. I got it. Another point for Darcy.Copy !req
792. Okay, Darcy.Copy !req
793. Uh...Copy !req
794. Do you rememberCopy !req
795. that time that we were
driving down the highwayCopy !req
796. and you very calmly told me to pull over?Copy !req
797. And you waited until we pulled overCopy !req
798. to tell me that there was
a giant spider on my head?Copy !req
799. Yeah. Yeah.Copy !req
800. Yeah, well, that was very smart.Copy !req
801. Because if you had told me before,
I might have panicked and crashed the car.Copy !req
802. Wait. Is there a spider on my head?Copy !req
803. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.Copy !req
804. No, no. I tell you this story because...Copy !req
805. I don't want you to panicCopy !req
806. when I tell you
what I'm about to tell you.Copy !req
807. Your grenade doesn't have a pin.Copy !req
808. - What does that mean?
- Well...Copy !req
809. Well, is it... is it...
is it gonna explode?Copy !req
810. No, no, no, no, no. No, no, no.Copy !req
811. Hold it exactly how you're
holding it. Good. Good.Copy !req
812. - Okay. Okay.
- Mm-hmm.Copy !req
813. That pin holds the handle on.Copy !req
814. But when you let go of the grenade,
the handle pops off,Copy !req
815. which lights the fuse,
and the whole thing goes...Copy !req
816. boom.Copy !req
817. How do you know
so much about grenades?Copy !req
818. Video games.Copy !req
819. So what should I do?
Should... Should I throw it?Copy !req
820. Well, my concern is that you won't be able
to throw it far enough to not blow us up.Copy !req
821. - No offense.
- God.Copy !req
822. So, what, I just...
I just hold this live grenade?Copy !req
823. This grenade is just part of my life now?Copy !req
824. Yeah, for now, yeah, yeah, yeah.Copy !req
825. Okay, here's the plan.Copy !req
826. We're gonna get a knife.Copy !req
827. - Okay. All right.
- I'm gonna cutCopy !req
828. through these ties,
we're gonna get rid of that grenade,Copy !req
829. and then we're gonna
head down to the docks.Copy !req
830. We're gonna bum-rush
the pirate guarding it,Copy !req
831. hop in a boat, and head
to the next island for help.Copy !req
832. - Okay?
- Tom, that plan...Copy !req
833. Has too many steps.
I see that now.Copy !req
834. Now, you got a simpler one?Copy !req
835. - Yes. Yes.
- What?Copy !req
836. - Yes. Okay.
- What are you doing?Copy !req
837. Get down here. Found it.Copy !req
838. - Found it. Yes.
- What are we doing?Copy !req
839. - Right here.
- What are we doing?Copy !req
840. Oh.Copy !req
841. Oh.Copy !req
842. Find cell service. Call for help.Copy !req
843. When did you put that in your underwear?Copy !req
844. Right before the pirates
took us out of the cabana.Copy !req
845. Because I'm a sneaky little bitch.Copy !req
846. Oh, you are a sneaky little bitch.Copy !req
847. Thank you.Copy !req
848. - Okay.
- Let's start walking.Copy !req
849. Sneaky. Sneaky little bitch.Copy !req
850. You're testing my patience, Robert!Copy !req
851. Look, you want my money?
I want my daughter.Copy !req
852. - It's a simple negotiation.
- Enough!Copy !req
853. All right.Copy !req
854. They're bringing him back.Copy !req
855. Move.Copy !req
856. Robert. What happened?
Are you okay?Copy !req
857. They didn't hurt you, did they?Copy !req
858. Well, I'm not giving them a dime
till I know my daughter's alive.Copy !req
859. That didn't go over very well.Copy !req
860. I'm afraid they're gonna start
shooting the hostages.Copy !req
861. I don't think
they're gonna do that.Copy !req
862. Isn't that exactly
what pirates do?Copy !req
863. Come out, Mr. Pirate Man!Copy !req
864. My nameCopy !req
865. is Carol Elaine Fowler,Copy !req
866. and I deserve to live.Copy !req
867. Carol, what are you doing?Copy !req
868. I'm humanizing myself.Copy !req
869. I saw it
on Good Morning America.Copy !req
870. If you humanize yourself to them,
they let you live.Copy !req
871. I am a wife. I am a mother.Copy !req
872. And I was Milford, Michigan's top realtor
in 1998,Copy !req
873. and again in 2007.Copy !req
874. I dream of going to Ireland.Copy !req
875. I was a late bloomer
and my teeth didn't come in till I was 14.Copy !req
876. Please pick me.Copy !req
877. My name is Jeannie Reed.Copy !req
878. I am a devoted mother
and a slightly less devoted wife.Copy !req
879. This is my first vacation without my kids,Copy !req
880. so I drank a lot of champagne
before the ceremony,Copy !req
881. took a couple of weed gummies,Copy !req
882. and the combination
is really killing me right now.Copy !req
883. I'm Amanda Walker.
I'm a godmother and a woman in tech.Copy !req
884. - I went to...
- I am Renata.Copy !req
885. I'm from Brazil.Copy !req
886. I have beautiful hair.Copy !req
887. Yeah. Very beautiful.Copy !req
888. What else?Copy !req
889. You're a mother.Copy !req
890. I am a mother.Copy !req
891. My name is Ricky Silver.Copy !req
892. A lot of my friends, they're pairing up,Copy !req
893. and they're getting married
and drinking loose-leaf tea and shit.Copy !req
894. And I'm still single. But last night...Copy !req
895. I made love to a gorgeous
and terrifying woman.Copy !req
896. You think I'm terrifying?Copy !req
897. You scare the shit out of me.Copy !req
898. I'm Larry Fowler.Copy !req
899. Oh...Copy !req
900. Thank you.Copy !req
901. - Oh.
- Oh, easy, Dad.Copy !req
902. - Hold the phone. Yes.
- How am I gonna...Copy !req
903. - Hold it steady.
- Hold it. Hold on.Copy !req
904. I just gotta get this thing
out of my head.Copy !req
905. It's driving me crazy.Copy !req
906. - Wait. Hold on. Just wait.
- What are you...Copy !req
907. What are you...
Are you stuffing a loose wadCopy !req
908. of hair in my pocket?Copy !req
909. Yes. A loose wad of very expensive,Copy !req
910. custom-made hair
that I would like to keep.Copy !req
911. If we survive.Copy !req
912. What's so funny?Copy !req
913. - I've just been...
- Ow, ow, ow!Copy !req
914. questioning everything lately.Copy !req
915. What if the wedding's not perfect?
What if your parents never like me?Copy !req
916. What does life look like after baseball?Copy !req
917. But not once did I wonderCopy !req
918. if I'd be walking handcuffed
through the jungle with a live grenade.Copy !req
919. Oh. Pirates chasing you
wasn't on your vision board?Copy !req
920. Well, you were the only thing
on my vision board.Copy !req
921. - I got it, I got it, I got it.
- Oh! Oh!Copy !req
922. - You got it? You got it?
- I got it. I got it.Copy !req
923. - Okay. I got it.
- Oh, good. Okay. Oh.Copy !req
924. - We have a bar.
- Oh, good.Copy !req
925. All right.Copy !req
926. - Keep your hands with me.
- Okay.Copy !req
927. - Okay.
- Call for help.Copy !req
928. Yes. Shit! It's gone.Copy !req
929. Well, keep trying.Copy !req
930. - I think, maybe...
- We have to go higher.Copy !req
931. - What?
- Yes.Copy !req
932. Not... No. No, no, no.
Uh, I don't like higher.Copy !req
933. Yeah, I don't... I don't think
this thing is built to code.Copy !req
934. - Tom.
- Anything?Copy !req
935. No. Come on.Copy !req
936. - Yeah.
- We're almost at the top.Copy !req
937. Maybe we should go back down
so we're not up so high.Copy !req
938. Don't think about the heights right now.
Okay? We're safe.Copy !req
939. Yeah. You use the word "safe"
very loosely.Copy !req
940. Oh, my God.Copy !req
941. - Full service. Full service.
- Oh, yes.Copy !req
942. I have full service.Copy !req
943. Whoa, whoa, whoa. Silence it.Copy !req
944. I'm trying.Copy !req
945. Your group chat is out of control.Copy !req
946. I will not apologize
for having enthusiastic friends.Copy !req
947. Oh! You dropped it.Copy !req
948. Come on!Copy !req
949. - We gotta zip.
- Zip?Copy !req
950. What do you mean, "zip"?Copy !req
951. Oh! Zip. Oh, God!Copy !req
952. Go, go, go.Copy !req
953. No, I don't think we have
the proper equipment.Copy !req
954. Well, they have guns.Copy !req
955. Is there some kind of a manual?Copy !req
956. Come down!Copy !req
957. We need helmets.
I see lots of helmets in the photos.Copy !req
958. And then why do they look scared?Copy !req
959. Stop thinking so much. Jump!Copy !req
960. - Stop screaming!
- Oh, God! Oh, my God!Copy !req
961. Whoa!Copy !req
962. Tom, don't let go.Copy !req
963. The fuck!Copy !req
964. Hold on, baby. Hold on.Copy !req
965. Okay.Copy !req
966. Uh...Copy !req
967. - Yeah!
- Yeah!Copy !req
968. What the hell was that?Copy !req
969. Oh, God!Copy !req
970. - Oh, God!
- How do we land this thing?Copy !req
971. Me first. I'm gonna go first.Copy !req
972. - What about me?
- No, let me. Me first.Copy !req
973. I'm gonna jump. I'm gonna jump.Copy !req
974. - Okay, okay.
- I got it. I got it.Copy !req
975. Here I go!Copy !req
976. Oh!Copy !req
977. These people are sick.Copy !req
978. You find them, but I kill them.Copy !req
979. You can have the man,Copy !req
980. but the bride is mine.Copy !req
981. Police, coast guard,
they're all right there.Copy !req
982. - How do we get across?
- I don't know.Copy !req
983. Okay, let's all go around
and play two truths and a lie.Copy !req
984. Be quiet!Copy !req
985. - Carol.
- Mom.Copy !req
986. Easy.Copy !req
987. Okay, come on.Copy !req
988. Come on, come on, come on.Copy !req
989. Oh, my God.Copy !req
990. Oh, my God.Copy !req
991. I'm gonna fix this.Copy !req
992. My poor mom.Copy !req
993. She thought she was gonna be able
to avoid my dad all weekend.Copy !req
994. My mom used to love my dad so much.Copy !req
995. He was her whole world.Copy !req
996. Then when he left, she just lost her joy.Copy !req
997. I mean, she acts tough, but...Copy !req
998. she never really recovered.Copy !req
999. - Darcy, I'm sorry...
- I know.Copy !req
1000. We have to keep moving.Copy !req
1001. What the hell does that mean?Copy !req
1002. Kitchen.Copy !req
1003. Okay, we need to find a knife.Copy !req
1004. - Oh. Mmm.
- What... What...Copy !req
1005. What are you doing?Copy !req
1006. I'm starving. Have you eaten today?Copy !req
1007. No, I'm not hungry.Copy !req
1008. Yes, you are. You're acting cranky.Copy !req
1009. - Mmm. Mmm! Mmm.
- Mmm.Copy !req
1010. Mmm, this is so delicious.Copy !req
1011. I love your mom.Copy !req
1012. Okay, come on.Copy !req
1013. Come on. Ow! Easy, easy.Copy !req
1014. I can't cut with one hand.Copy !req
1015. Well, I can't cut with no hands.Copy !req
1016. We need to find something else.Copy !req
1017. Okay?Copy !req
1018. Something that cuts through plastic.Copy !req
1019. Hmm...Copy !req
1020. Yep.Copy !req
1021. - Is this a bad idea?
- Yeah.Copy !req
1022. - You ready?
- No!Copy !req
1023. Okay.Copy !req
1024. There you go.Copy !req
1025. Hang on, hang on, hang on!Copy !req
1026. Darcy, you're stalling.Copy !req
1027. - I know.
- We got this.Copy !req
1028. - Okay. Yes.
- We got this.Copy !req
1029. - On my count. Ready?
- Okay.Copy !req
1030. - Yes.
- Ten, nine, eight...Copy !req
1031. Why are you counting from ten?Copy !req
1032. What is this, a rocket launch?Copy !req
1033. Okay, fine. On four.Copy !req
1034. One, two, three...Copy !req
1035. No one goes on four.Copy !req
1036. - No one goes on four.
- All right...Copy !req
1037. Shh! Shh.Copy !req
1038. - Okay.
- Just...Copy !req
1039. - Just like a Band-Aid.
- Fine, fine.Copy !req
1040. - Ready? Go.
- Like a Band-Aid.Copy !req
1041. Oh, my God.Copy !req
1042. Come on.Copy !req
1043. Tom!Copy !req
1044. Tom.Copy !req
1045. I thought you left.Copy !req
1046. What?Copy !req
1047. No.Copy !req
1048. Never.Copy !req
1049. Where'd your mom's knife go?Copy !req
1050. Oh, Jesus, help me.Copy !req
1051. That's good.Copy !req
1052. Throw me those boots.Copy !req
1053. What?Copy !req
1054. That dress is growing on me.Copy !req
1055. Thanks.Copy !req
1056. I wanted something less traditional.Copy !req
1057. Yes. Maybe Margy's got
a hard line to the Internet.Copy !req
1058. Wow, does Margy love corgis.Copy !req
1059. No. Damn it.Copy !req
1060. You go over there,
I'll go here.Copy !req
1061. - Yeah.
- They're right there.Copy !req
1062. - What do I do?
- I don't know.Copy !req
1063. I don't know.Copy !req
1064. - Oh, Margy.
- This way.Copy !req
1065. Go, go, go.Copy !req
1066. Okay. I got you.Copy !req
1067. It's okay. It's okay.Copy !req
1068. Come. Faster, faster.Copy !req
1069. Ace, Margy...Copy !req
1070. - Is this your bunker?
- Uh-huh.Copy !req
1071. - Man cave.
- Is it spinning?Copy !req
1072. Is it spinning for anyone else?Copy !req
1073. You're losing blood. Sit down.Copy !req
1074. - Sit down. Okay.
- Bandages. Ace.Copy !req
1075. I'll get the medical kit.Copy !req
1076. Give me your hand. I'm gonna wrap it.Copy !req
1077. No. No, no, no. No.Copy !req
1078. Are you sure? It's disgusting.Copy !req
1079. Yeah.Copy !req
1080. Oh. Cheers.Copy !req
1081. Okay.Copy !req
1082. Looks like it's got a flap.Copy !req
1083. It's got a loose flap.Copy !req
1084. - Listen, just be...
- Mm-hmm.Copy !req
1085. Just... Just be careful with the flap.Copy !req
1086. Please stop saying "flap," okay?Copy !req
1087. I'm totally fine. Just don't say flap.Copy !req
1088. - How many are there?
- Uh...Copy !req
1089. Two in the lobby.
Couple more by the pool with the hostages.Copy !req
1090. And, uh, one by the dock, right?Copy !req
1091. But we got four.Copy !req
1092. What do you mean, "got"?Copy !req
1093. Got them to stop, you know,Copy !req
1094. being alive.Copy !req
1095. Holy shit.Copy !req
1096. Well, yeah, we didn't see
any of your staff, though.Copy !req
1097. I saw them getting locked up in the spa.Copy !req
1098. They never bother with the locals.Copy !req
1099. Americans are the rich idiots. No offense.Copy !req
1100. I just don't understand
why the pirates are still here.Copy !req
1101. Last time, they just looted the rooms.Copy !req
1102. Twenty minutes, gone.Copy !req
1103. What do you mean, "last time"?Copy !req
1104. Last year.Copy !req
1105. Two thousand islands
in the Philippines,Copy !req
1106. and they hit us twice?Copy !req
1107. - It's not fair.
- Wait, wait.Copy !req
1108. The pirates were here last summer?Copy !req
1109. And you let us have our wedding here?Copy !req
1110. What? Tom-Tom. We talked about it, huh?Copy !req
1111. You knew about this?Copy !req
1112. Well, first of all,
nobody got killed last summer.Copy !req
1113. And we both agreed thatCopy !req
1114. the chances of it happening again
were very small.Copy !req
1115. - Who's "we"?
- Me and Margy.Copy !req
1116. We e-mailed a lot,Copy !req
1117. and I asked a lot of
tough questions, didn't I?Copy !req
1118. How could you not tell me about this?Copy !req
1119. You didn't tell me that
you were having doubtsCopy !req
1120. about getting married, so...Copy !req
1121. Yeah, you're right. I didn't.
You know why?Copy !req
1122. Because all last year,
you were in your head about everything.Copy !req
1123. You thought my dad didn't like you,
so you started acting all weird.Copy !req
1124. And now my dad doesn't like you.Copy !req
1125. You thought the Robins
were gonna drop you.Copy !req
1126. And then you started playing badly,
and they did drop you.Copy !req
1127. You think that something bad
is gonna happen,Copy !req
1128. and then you make it happen.Copy !req
1129. That's called self-sabotage.Copy !req
1130. It is. Ace, thank you.Copy !req
1131. And all you were excited about
was this wedding.Copy !req
1132. And I knew that if I told you
that I was having doubts,Copy !req
1133. that you would sabotage
our whole relationship.Copy !req
1134. Which you did anyway!Copy !req
1135. I didn't sabotage anything.Copy !req
1136. I tried to make this wedding perfect.Copy !req
1137. And it all got ruined the day
your boy Sean showed up.Copy !req
1138. This has nothing to do with Sean.Copy !req
1139. This is about your insecurities.Copy !req
1140. And this whole weddingCopy !req
1141. was your way of trying
to get control of your life,Copy !req
1142. because you have to control everything.Copy !req
1143. It's like when you get out of the car
to "help me" parallel park,Copy !req
1144. when I can do it just fine on my own.Copy !req
1145. Yeah, I wouldn't call
a 17-point turn "just fine."Copy !req
1146. Well, those jeans you bought
from Old Navy last monthCopy !req
1147. were women's jeans.Copy !req
1148. Uh...Copy !req
1149. Well, I found them in the men's section.Copy !req
1150. They made you look like Stevie Nicks.Copy !req
1151. That haircut that you got last year,
I hated it.Copy !req
1152. It made your head look square.
You looked like a fucking Simpson.Copy !req
1153. You said it was chic.Copy !req
1154. You act so confident,Copy !req
1155. so strong,
but you're just a scared little girl.Copy !req
1156. You're afraid to go all in
on this relationshipCopy !req
1157. because it means you might
have something to lose.Copy !req
1158. Well, you know what?
None of it matters anyway.Copy !req
1159. Because everyone we love could die.Copy !req
1160. Because of me.Copy !req
1161. I think they're
in the manager's house.Copy !req
1162. I think they heard it.Copy !req
1163. Why?Copy !req
1164. They stopped speaking English.Copy !req
1165. Here. Take it.Copy !req
1166. Don't. Tom.Copy !req
1167. We need to get out of here.
Where does this tunnel go?Copy !req
1168. It leads straight to the pool
where the rest of the pirates are.Copy !req
1169. Oh, that's not ideal.Copy !req
1170. What are they saying?Copy !req
1171. No clue.Copy !req
1172. I don't know what language that is,
but it ain't Filipino.Copy !req
1173. - No.
- No.Copy !req
1174. No one move. Stay right here.Copy !req
1175. Nobody move.Copy !req
1176. What are you doing?Copy !req
1177. Okay.Copy !req
1178. They know someone's here,
but they don't know all of us are.Copy !req
1179. You stay here until it's over.Copy !req
1180. Tom!Copy !req
1181. Tom! They're gonna kill you.Copy !req
1182. - Don't do this.
- I have to.Copy !req
1183. This isn't about us anymore. This is...Copy !req
1184. This whole thing is my fault.Copy !req
1185. You deserve better.Copy !req
1186. Wait, Tom!Copy !req
1187. Uh... Oh, hey.Copy !req
1188. Hey, pirates!Copy !req
1189. I'm Tom, the groom you guys
have been looking for,Copy !req
1190. and I am officially surrendering.Copy !req
1191. - Shut up!
- All right.Copy !req
1192. What, you don't like
to be called "pirates"?Copy !req
1193. I wanted to be a pirate when I was a kid,
and you guys are actually doin' it.Copy !req
1194. - Move.
- You're livin' the dream.Copy !req
1195. Congratulations.Copy !req
1196. They didn't kill him. Oh, my God.Copy !req
1197. He's still alive.Copy !req
1198. Go!Copy !req
1199. Keep going. Just move.Copy !req
1200. Tommy. Oh, my God.
It's Tommy. Tommy!Copy !req
1201. Shut up!Copy !req
1202. - Tommy, where is Darcy?
- Shut up!Copy !req
1203. Yes. Where is your bride?Copy !req
1204. I... I don't know.Copy !req
1205. Truly. Honestly. I... I... I don't.Copy !req
1206. For reals. I don't...
I don't... I don't know.Copy !req
1207. You're a bad liar.Copy !req
1208. Yeah, he is a bad liar.Copy !req
1209. Tom, if you know something,
the best thing you can do is cooperate.Copy !req
1210. All they want is the money.Copy !req
1211. You know what? Thank you, Sean,
as always, for being the voice of reason.Copy !req
1212. Enough!Copy !req
1213. - Okay, fine!
- Okay.Copy !req
1214. I'll tell you where she is.Copy !req
1215. Katuk kak ci.Copy !req
1216. What?Copy !req
1217. Holy shit. What did you say to him?Copy !req
1218. It's kind of an inside joke, Sean.Copy !req
1219. Can you give me a hand?
I'm a little woozy.Copy !req
1220. 'Course, man. Here, I got you.Copy !req
1221. Whoa, whoa! Whoa!Copy !req
1222. What the hell are you doing?Copy !req
1223. Don't move or I swear to God,
you'll lose an eye.Copy !req
1224. Tommy, what are you doing?Copy !req
1225. Are you gonna spill the beans or should I?Copy !req
1226. What beans?Copy !req
1227. Just spill the beans.Copy !req
1228. Sean hired these guysCopy !req
1229. to invade our wedding
to take Robert's money!Copy !req
1230. Whoa. No, no, no, no, Tom.Copy !req
1231. No, it's true.Copy !req
1232. That is a serious accusation,Copy !req
1233. but it's okay,Copy !req
1234. 'cause jealousy can get
the best of any of us.Copy !req
1235. Oh, no, no, no. I'm not jealous.Copy !req
1236. Kind of.Copy !req
1237. It is completely normal
for you to see me as a threatCopy !req
1238. because Deedee and ICopy !req
1239. had something transcendent.Copy !req
1240. But I am not a bad guy.Copy !req
1241. And I definitely don't have
anything to do with these pirates.Copy !req
1242. Oh, yeah? Then why did he deck me
when I told him to go fuck his grandpa?Copy !req
1243. Just listen. Listen to yourself.Copy !req
1244. I said it in Balinese.
These guys are not local.Copy !req
1245. They're from Bali.Copy !req
1246. Margy said the local pirates
just looted and left last time.Copy !req
1247. It took 'em, like, 20 minutes.Copy !req
1248. Oh, God. "Last time"?Copy !req
1249. We were clearly targeted.
This whole thing was planned.Copy !req
1250. They knew about Robert's money.Copy !req
1251. And none of it made sense
until I found this.Copy !req
1252. Ricky, grab my... Grab the... the...Copy !req
1253. - Yeah, yeah.
- In my front pocket. Grab...Copy !req
1254. There's an envelope in my front pocket.Copy !req
1255. Just grab it!Copy !req
1256. There you go.Copy !req
1257. A-ha!Copy !req
1258. Slow, slow. Go slow.Copy !req
1259. Your wedding invitation?Copy !req
1260. Yes, but I got it off
of one of these guys.Copy !req
1261. Now, how did they get that invitation?Copy !req
1262. - I don't know.
- Uh...Copy !req
1263. It had to be given to him
by an invited guest.Copy !req
1264. Now, what invited guest
could that be? Huh?Copy !req
1265. Ricky, op... open it.Copy !req
1266. A-ha!Copy !req
1267. This ass hat thought it was appropriate
to show up to a wedding he didn't RSVP to!Copy !req
1268. He didn't RSVP!Copy !req
1269. Mom, that's not the main issue right now.Copy !req
1270. Look, I'm a mother. I can be upset
about a lot of things at the same time.Copy !req
1271. I think, right now, we should be upset
about one thing.Copy !req
1272. - Oh, okay.
- Sean had these guysCopy !req
1273. crash our wedding
so that he could get a big fat ransomCopy !req
1274. from his best friend, Robert.Copy !req
1275. Huh? Yeah!Copy !req
1276. - Bob... Bob.
- Yes!Copy !req
1277. This is because I didn't give youCopy !req
1278. that investment money
you wanted, isn't it?Copy !req
1279. - Yeah.
- No, no, it's not like that.Copy !req
1280. How could... Papi.Copy !req
1281. How could you believe
that I would come here and betray ev...Copy !req
1282. Believe it, Robert. Believe it.Copy !req
1283. - That's right. That's right.
- Shit.Copy !req
1284. See? See, I told ya! I told ya!Copy !req
1285. These lanterns are so intricate.
Is there a note in it?Copy !req
1286. "Be excellent to each other."Copy !req
1287. - Hmm.
- Hmm. Huh.Copy !req
1288. It's from Bill and Ted's
Excellent Adventure.Copy !req
1289. Tom wanted to put a movie quote
in each one of the lanterns, and I...Copy !req
1290. I thought it was stupid, but it's not.Copy !req
1291. It's sweet.Copy !req
1292. And I messed it all up.Copy !req
1293. I don't know how you guys do it.Copy !req
1294. You must have something
really special.Copy !req
1295. - Not really.
- Oi.Copy !req
1296. Uh, I mean, it is special
but it is not magic.Copy !req
1297. We just made a vow.Copy !req
1298. And we've messed things up
thousands of times.Copy !req
1299. But when we break something, we fix it.Copy !req
1300. Darcy, we come with you,
but we don't want to.Copy !req
1301. Tommy finally made the big leagues.Copy !req
1302. Yeah, I never heard that one before.Copy !req
1303. I know you haven't.Copy !req
1304. - Where is she?
- I don't know.Copy !req
1305. I don't... I... I don't... I don't know.Copy !req
1306. - You're lying.
- No, I'm... I'm... Honestly,Copy !req
1307. - I don't know.
- Okay.Copy !req
1308. God damn it!Copy !req
1309. - Would you stop doing that?
- Yeah.Copy !req
1310. - He'll do it again.
- Fine. Fine.Copy !req
1311. I was lying.Copy !req
1312. After we cut ourselves loose,
Darcy and I got into a fight.Copy !req
1313. She hopped in a golf cart
to go look for cell receptionCopy !req
1314. up by the northern coast
near the cliffs, and then I...Copy !req
1315. I came back here
to try to rescue everyone.Copy !req
1316. Come on!Copy !req
1317. Okay.Copy !req
1318. We'll take the chopper to find her.Copy !req
1319. I'm comin' with you.Copy !req
1320. I've been watching you
mess this up all day.Copy !req
1321. This is my show now.Copy !req
1322. Wow, that's really good.Copy !req
1323. We're doing this my way now. You got it?Copy !req
1324. We need collateral.Copy !req
1325. Get the girlfriend.Copy !req
1326. Hey. Come.Copy !req
1327. - Here. Move!
- Ow! Hey.Copy !req
1328. Oh, no.Copy !req
1329. - Go. Move!
- Please, I'm a Gemini.Copy !req
1330. I bruise easily.Copy !req
1331. - Go!
- Ow! Ow! Ow!Copy !req
1332. - Oh, my God!
- Robert? Robert!Copy !req
1333. When I get back,
that money better be in my account.Copy !req
1334. And if it's not, she's dead.Copy !req
1335. And I treated you just like a son.Copy !req
1336. - You're stuck with Tommy now.
- Robert.Copy !req
1337. - Well, what's wrong with that?
- Fuck off.Copy !req
1338. No, no, no, no, no, no, no.Copy !req
1339. Darcy...Copy !req
1340. Tom, you promised you wouldn't
leave my side this weekend.Copy !req
1341. Darcy, what are you doing?Copy !req
1342. Tom, listen.Copy !req
1343. I'm still mad at you
for picking this pirate island,Copy !req
1344. but I messed up too.
I should've told you...Copy !req
1345. how scared I was to get married.Copy !req
1346. That wasn't fair.Copy !req
1347. You worked so hard
on this pirate island wedding.Copy !req
1348. Okay, no, no, no.
Please stop calling it that.Copy !req
1349. I just worried that if I told you...Copy !req
1350. that I would lose you.Copy !req
1351. And I can't lose you.Copy !req
1352. I need you.Copy !req
1353. Okay?Copy !req
1354. Okay?Copy !req
1355. Okay.Copy !req
1356. - Okay.
- Okay.Copy !req
1357. This is so much better than South Pacific.Copy !req
1358. And Mom, Dad?Copy !req
1359. Whoa!Copy !req
1360. - Babe.
- What the fuck?Copy !req
1361. Did you just shoot me?Copy !req
1362. Stop shooting your sister!Copy !req
1363. I didn't mean to. It was a mistake. I...Copy !req
1364. Mom, Dad, apologize to Tom.Copy !req
1365. - What? Why?
- What?Copy !req
1366. For criticizing this beautiful wedding
that he planned,Copy !req
1367. and for never making him
feel welcome in our family.Copy !req
1368. And for inviting Sean to our wedding.Copy !req
1369. Okay, honey, but I think there'sCopy !req
1370. - a more pressing issue...
- Apologize!Copy !req
1371. He is the best personCopy !req
1372. that I know.Copy !req
1373. And if you say one more bad thing
about him,Copy !req
1374. I swear I will shoot you
like I shot Jamie.Copy !req
1375. Tom, I'm sorry. Sorry.Copy !req
1376. - Tom, sorry. Sorry.
- We love you.Copy !req
1377. - Oh, hey, it's fine.
- You're the best personCopy !req
1378. - I've ever met.
- It's okay. I love you.Copy !req
1379. - We love you like family.
- I love you, too.Copy !req
1380. - All right. It's all good.
- I love this place. Beautiful.Copy !req
1381. And, Carol, Larry...Copy !req
1382. I'm sorry! I'm sorry!Copy !req
1383. This was more about me and my family,
but we should get lunch sometime.Copy !req
1384. - I would...
- Oh, yeah,Copy !req
1385. - lunch sounds great. Yeah.
- We love eating.Copy !req
1386. It's hard for anyone to live up
to your perfect marriage.Copy !req
1387. Who told you
we had a perfect marriage?Copy !req
1388. Oh, come on, Mom.
You guys fought, like, once.Copy !req
1389. It was about who loved the dog more.Copy !req
1390. I mean, what is not perfect
about your marriage?Copy !req
1391. Well, I made love to your Aunt Marie.Copy !req
1392. What?Copy !req
1393. - Yeah.
- Then I went outCopy !req
1394. and started doing all this weird sex stuffCopy !req
1395. with Jim Roberts.Copy !req
1396. Yeah. You and Jim RobertsCopy !req
1397. - went on for a couple months.
- Yes.Copy !req
1398. - Because our bodies just fit.
- Holy...Copy !req
1399. In the end,
Jim Roberts just wasn't your dad.Copy !req
1400. And Aunt Marie realized
that she had a sex addiction.Copy !req
1401. But then you know what? We worked it out.Copy !req
1402. These are some incredible breakthroughs,Copy !req
1403. - right? I mean...
- Give me that!Copy !req
1404. You remember me, huh?Copy !req
1405. Look, you burn my face. Huh?Copy !req
1406. Yes, I know. I still feel
really bad about that.Copy !req
1407. Everybody, in the pool! Now!Copy !req
1408. Get in the pool! In!Copy !req
1409. Go! Go!Copy !req
1410. - Hey, you okay?
- Yes.Copy !req
1411. - Yeah?
- Are we missing people?Copy !req
1412. Yeah. Turns out
your boy Sean's an asshole.Copy !req
1413. We have the bride.Copy !req
1414. Do you copy?Copy !req
1415. Do you copy?Copy !req
1416. Up! Up!Copy !req
1417. Listen to me. Move.Copy !req
1418. Balinese? So these guys are Balinese?Copy !req
1419. And Sean is full of shit,
and they took Harriett hostage?Copy !req
1420. It doesn't make sense.Copy !req
1421. Why would Sean take Harriett hostage
on the helicopterCopy !req
1422. when she was already
being held hostage here?Copy !req
1423. I don't know. Maybe he wanted
to take her extra hostage.Copy !req
1424. I think Harriett is in on it.Copy !req
1425. - What?
- What do you mean?Copy !req
1426. Harriett and Sean...Copy !req
1427. are boyfriend-girlfriend.Copy !req
1428. - Oh, come on.
- Boyfriend-girlfriend?Copy !req
1429. No, no. Look.Copy !req
1430. This is from last night.Copy !req
1431. Here we go.Copy !req
1432. Let's see.Copy !req
1433. Uh, hold on. Let me find it.Copy !req
1434. Oh. Oh, boy.Copy !req
1435. Yeah. There you go.Copy !req
1436. What? Go ahead. Say it.Copy !req
1437. Roberto...Copy !req
1438. Lo siento.Copy !req
1439. Gracias.Copy !req
1440. De nada.Copy !req
1441. There!Copy !req
1442. Sean, you promised
this job would make us rich.Copy !req
1443. So far, all it's done
is killed four of my men.Copy !req
1444. Man, you know we can fix this.Copy !req
1445. Deal is off. I keep the money.Copy !req
1446. You walk away with your life.Copy !req
1447. I don't wanna hear it.
You and I had an arrangement.Copy !req
1448. Sean, be reasonable. He saved us.Copy !req
1449. - We're lucky to be alive.
- What are you talking about?Copy !req
1450. Listen to your woman.Copy !req
1451. Oh.Copy !req
1452. It's okay. It's just a pressure point.
Relax.Copy !req
1453. Just breathe into it.Copy !req
1454. What?Copy !req
1455. What?Copy !req
1456. Take us back down.Copy !req
1457. We'll finish the job ourselves.Copy !req
1458. - Babe.
- What?Copy !req
1459. - Excellent idea.
- Yeah, I know.Copy !req
1460. I have to do everything myself!Copy !req
1461. What are we gonna do?
They'll be back any minute.Copy !req
1462. - Just...
- Hey, hey, hey!Copy !req
1463. No whispers.
Or I throw grenade in the pool.Copy !req
1464. Okay.Copy !req
1465. Go with me, okay?Copy !req
1466. Just go with me.Copy !req
1467. Hey, everybody.Copy !req
1468. Look, I know this may
not be the best time,Copy !req
1469. but this may be our only chance
to have our wedding.Copy !req
1470. What do you say, Darcy?Copy !req
1471. Yeah, I... I love it.Copy !req
1472. Can... Can we do bride's side on the left
and groom's on the right?Copy !req
1473. Hey, Margy, will you officiate?Copy !req
1474. Hey, will you stop?
Stop it! Stop it now!Copy !req
1475. Wait, wait. If...Copy !req
1476. If you let my daughter have her wedding,
I'll... I'll release the funds.Copy !req
1477. Okay, let's go.Copy !req
1478. Let's go.Copy !req
1479. Thanks, Dad.Copy !req
1480. It's okay, princess.Copy !req
1481. There are some things
that are more important than money.Copy !req
1482. I don't know what they are,
but I think, uh...Copy !req
1483. Hope you know what you're doing.Copy !req
1484. Whoa, whoa, whoa.Copy !req
1485. I think you'd regret that.Copy !req
1486. Oh! No, no. Stop.Copy !req
1487. I'm fairly new to grenades.Copy !req
1488. But I'm pretty sure that if you shoot me,
this springy thing pops off,Copy !req
1489. and then this thing blows us all away.Copy !req
1490. - Ain't that right, babe?
- That's right, baby.Copy !req
1491. - No, no, no.
- What the...Copy !req
1492. Drop the guns.Copy !req
1493. No.Copy !req
1494. I can't throw that far.
It won't reach him.Copy !req
1495. Nobody fucks with my family.Copy !req
1496. Darcy? Give me a meatball.Copy !req
1497. Shit.Copy !req
1498. I know where to go!Copy !req
1499. Let's get moving! Out of the pool!Copy !req
1500. - Yeah!
- Come on! Come, come, come!Copy !req
1501. Get out of the pool! Come on!Copy !req
1502. - Yeah, let's go.
- Margy! The spa!Copy !req
1503. It's safe in the spa!Copy !req
1504. They should've been
killing hostages every hour.Copy !req
1505. Killing people works, Sean.Copy !req
1506. - Fuck.
- Look, give me one chanceCopy !req
1507. to convince Darcy.Copy !req
1508. - All right? One.
- Fine. One chance.Copy !req
1509. Thank you, baby.Copy !req
1510. This is not a moment right now, Sean.Copy !req
1511. - Move, come on! Come on!
- All right!Copy !req
1512. Mom! Mom, we're gonna go get help.Copy !req
1513. I need you to take care of them.
Can you do that?Copy !req
1514. And Carol...Copy !req
1515. thank you for the cake knife.Copy !req
1516. I fucking love this cake knife.Copy !req
1517. It's just you and me now. Let's go.Copy !req
1518. Hey, wasn't this
the plan with too many steps?Copy !req
1519. You did this for me?Copy !req
1520. Is this what you wanted?Copy !req
1521. Just you and me
in the middle of the ocean?Copy !req
1522. Darcy, I'm sorry
I stopped listening to you.Copy !req
1523. I just thought that
if I planned the perfect wedding,Copy !req
1524. we could have the perfect marriage, but...Copy !req
1525. But that doesn't exist.Copy !req
1526. I mean, look at my parents.Copy !req
1527. My Aunt Marie, the sex addict.Copy !req
1528. I just wanna be with you.
All that matters is you.Copy !req
1529. We don't ever have to get married.Copy !req
1530. And if we survive this thing,
can we just...Copy !req
1531. Can we start over?Copy !req
1532. Go, go, go, go.Copy !req
1533. Deedee, listen to me!Copy !req
1534. Deedee, this is
a huge misunderstanding, all right?Copy !req
1535. Let's go back to the resort,
talk this over. I do not want to hurt you.Copy !req
1536. Then stop shooting at us, asshole!Copy !req
1537. And stop calling her Deedee!Copy !req
1538. - Fuck!
- Oh, Jesus!Copy !req
1539. This thing is awful!Copy !req
1540. Yeah!Copy !req
1541. Asshole! Fuckin' leave! What the fuck?Copy !req
1542. God, I can't believe you, Sean!
When did you turn into such a monster?Copy !req
1543. I am not a monster!Copy !req
1544. I'm an entrepreneur!Copy !req
1545. I think I'm out of ammo.Copy !req
1546. - Are you sure?
- Not at all.Copy !req
1547. Hey.Copy !req
1548. - Yeah.
- I don't wanna do this.Copy !req
1549. I'm a good guy, damn it!Copy !req
1550. Shit.Copy !req
1551. Your boat's dead.Copy !req
1552. We're both out of ammo. Let's just go back
and we can work this whole thing out.Copy !req
1553. Tom!Copy !req
1554. Go, go!Copy !req
1555. Darcy, turn this boat around right now.Copy !req
1556. No.Copy !req
1557. You're a piece of shit, Sean,
but I know you can't kill me.Copy !req
1558. You're right.Copy !req
1559. But I would love to kill this guy.Copy !req
1560. You just keep messing things up, man.
This is on you.Copy !req
1561. I don't wanna do this. I'm a good guy.Copy !req
1562. No, you're not.Copy !req
1563. All right, you're right. I'm not.Copy !req
1564. Sean!Copy !req
1565. You were a pity invite!Copy !req
1566. Shit!Copy !req
1567. Whoa! Whoa!Copy !req
1568. No! Fuck!Copy !req
1569. Is that a wad of loose hair?Copy !req
1570. Custom-made hair!Copy !req
1571. Get down!Copy !req
1572. Oh, frick.Copy !req
1573. Hold on.Copy !req
1574. Oh, shit.Copy !req
1575. Holy shit.Copy !req
1576. So when I asked you beforeCopy !req
1577. if we could start over...Copy !req
1578. I don't wanna start over.Copy !req
1579. I wanna keep going.Copy !req
1580. Tom Fowler,Copy !req
1581. will you marry me?Copy !req
1582. Are you sure?Copy !req
1583. You're not scared?Copy !req
1584. I'm terrified.Copy !req
1585. Life is always gonna be chaotic.Copy !req
1586. But what I know for sure...Copy !req
1587. is that I wanna go through
all of it with you.Copy !req
1588. It's simple, really.Copy !req
1589. Just a plan with one step.Copy !req
1590. Still fits.Copy !req
1591. Stop. Be quiet.Copy !req
1592. Shit! Sorry! Sorry!Copy !req
1593. There was one firework leftCopy !req
1594. and I thought it would be fun,
and beautiful, and poignant,Copy !req
1595. but it was absolutely not!Copy !req
1596. Come here.Copy !req
1597. Whoo!Copy !req
1598. Make sure the batteries work.Copy !req
1599. I'm so sorry that I invited two con men
to your wedding.Copy !req
1600. And I don't know
if I'm attracted to toxic people,Copy !req
1601. or toxic people are attracted to me.Copy !req