1. The lore tells us of a valiant few
who stood above the fray and fog.Copy !req
2. My, what weapons they must have wielded.Copy !req
3. Which brings us to our current exhibit,Copy !req
4. the mythical staff of the gods.Copy !req
5. In Homer's tale,Copy !req
6. the staff was said to harness
the gift of all gods.Copy !req
7. Oh. Welcome, proud soldiers.Copy !req
8. What did I say?Copy !req
9. Museums are fun.Copy !req
10. Amusement parks for the brains.Copy !req
11. Okay,Copy !req
12. there's no reason to get pushy.Copy !req
13. Everyone will get a chance to see it.Copy !req
14. Carved from a heartwood
not seen in over 2,000 years,Copy !req
15. the two halves of this ancient replicaCopy !req
16. were recently discovered in,
of all places,Copy !req
17. a waste processing plant
outside of Philadelphia.Copy !req
18. So strong, they reportedly broke
three trash compactors.Copy !req
19. Okay, friends, that's enough.Copy !req
20. I'm sort of the star of the show here.Copy !req
21. Stop!Copy !req
22. Stop! Sir!Copy !req
23. Sir!Copy !req
24. Hey!Copy !req
25. Hey, what are you doing?Copy !req
26. Unleash the chaos.Copy !req
27. Unleash the chaos.Copy !req
28. Unleash the chaos.Copy !req
29. Wait, wait. Move, move, move!Copy !req
30. No. No.Copy !req
31. Help me!Copy !req
32. No!Copy !req
33. Ladies, please just let me go.Copy !req
34. Oh, my God! Look out!Copy !req
35. Turns out museums are fun.Copy !req
36. Let's have more of it.Copy !req
37. We can do nothing
while the staff remains sundered.Copy !req
38. The champions of this realm outnumber us.Copy !req
39. Human champions are still humans,Copy !req
40. and we are gods.Copy !req
41. Do not underestimate
the judgement of the wizard.Copy !req
42. To protect the power of the gods,Copy !req
43. he will have chosen,
with meticulous precision,Copy !req
44. the strongest, most keenly
intelligent championsCopy !req
45. this realm has ever witnessed.Copy !req
46. I'm an idiot.Copy !req
47. I don't deserve these powers,
if I'm being honest.Copy !req
48. Like, what am I even contributing?Copy !req
49. There's already a superhero
with a red suit,Copy !req
50. with a lightning bolt on itCopy !req
51. and I'm fast, but he's faster.Copy !req
52. Aquaman is literally huge,
and he's so manlyCopy !req
53. and Batman is so cool!Copy !req
54. And I'm just me.Copy !req
55. And I can't say this to anyone else,Copy !req
56. 'cause my family looks to me as a leader,Copy !req
57. but I feel like a fraud.Copy !req
58. You understand I'm aCopy !req
59. pediatrician,Copy !req
60. right?Copy !req
61. I mean, yeah, well, you were recommendedCopy !req
62. by another patient, Billy Batson.Copy !req
63. It doesn't matter.Copy !req
64. Can you help fix my thoughts so thatCopy !req
65. they just, like, you know, stop happening?Copy !req
66. All right, look.Copy !req
67. And, again, pediatrician,
not a psychiatrist,Copy !req
68. but it sounds to me like
you're experiencing imposter syndrome.Copy !req
69. And often, that originates
from trauma early in life,Copy !req
70. so if you don't mind me asking,Copy !req
71. how well do you remember your childhood?Copy !req
72. Like it was today.Copy !req
73. Trauma? I don't know.Copy !req
74. I mean, I never met my dad.Copy !req
75. My mom abandoned me
at a Christmas carnival.Copy !req
76. I spent a lot of time
in the foster system,Copy !req
77. ran away from 11 homes,
got into a lot of fights.Copy !req
78. Then I was abducted by a wizard
who gave me superpowersCopy !req
79. and then dude just, like,
died in front of my face.Copy !req
80. That's not a small amount.Copy !req
81. A doctor conjured seven demons
and held my whole family hostage,Copy !req
82. so we had to rip out one of his eyeballs,Copy !req
83. and then everybody got superpowers,Copy !req
84. but now everyone's kind of,
like, doing their own thingCopy !req
85. and I'm the only one
trying to keep everybody together.Copy !req
86. Okay, okay. Well, let's just process that.Copy !req
87. Right? Rejected by your parents,Copy !req
88. then by the system,Copy !req
89. and now rejected by
a city you try to protect.Copy !req
90. I never said I was rejected by my city.Copy !req
91. "Rejected by city."Copy !req
92. That's the Tribune.
Nobody reads the Tribune.Copy !req
93. - I do.
- Anyway, okay, well,Copy !req
94. I appreciate your help,
but I got some real problems.Copy !req
95. There's this terrorist hostage
situation going on, so...Copy !req
96. - Hostage situation?
- Yeah.Copy !req
97. I suck balls at this.Copy !req
98. Why do we always have to play war games?Copy !req
99. Hey, it's practice for our other job.Copy !req
100. I'm serious.Copy !req
101. Military strategy, multiple team members,Copy !req
102. each with a special skillsetCopy !req
103. unleashed against an unknown enemy.Copy !req
104. I know how it sounds,Copy !req
105. but the house keeps getting
struck by lightning, Leo.Copy !req
106. I'm telling you.Copy !req
107. Besides, you're the one
always talking about teamwork.Copy !req
108. But we don't need guns!Copy !req
109. Darla?Copy !req
110. This is it. This is big time.Copy !req
111. - We are the guns.
- Darla!Copy !req
112. Why were there Skittles in my pockets?Copy !req
113. It was supposed to be a surprise.Copy !req
114. It was.Copy !req
115. She's very moody lately.Copy !req
116. Why do you think
I put Skittles in her pocket?Copy !req
117. - Oh.
- Olé.Copy !req
118. Is this an army of unicornsCopy !req
119. - killing Genghis Khan?
- Yes.Copy !req
120. Unicorns aren't real.Copy !req
121. It's called speculative history, Eugene.Copy !req
122. - Look it up.
- Billy, you can't just leave.Copy !req
123. Your guy's gonna die!Copy !req
124. I told you you would get into it
if you gave it a chance.Copy !req
125. Yeah, I'm really starting
to see the appeal.Copy !req
126. What's going on?Copy !req
127. Dude, what are you doing?Copy !req
128. Possible 10-99 in progress.Copy !req
129. Multiple reports of cracking on roadway.Copy !req
130. Fraying suspension cables.Copy !req
131. All units to the Ben Franklin Bridge.Copy !req
132. - Yeah. It's crazy music, Freddy.
- It is, isn't it?Copy !req
133. Very urgent melody to it.Copy !req
134. We should see it performed live.Copy !req
135. I was thinking the same thing.Copy !req
136. I feel like we can get tickets
to that concert.Copy !req
137. Two. Maybe not six.Copy !req
138. All or none. That's the rule.Copy !req
139. Yet I'm still gonna walk backwards now.Copy !req
140. So, now's your last and final chance.Copy !req
141. Billy Batson, come with me.Copy !req
142. No, no, no!Copy !req
143. Man, it sure is a beautiful day
in Philadelphia!Copy !req
144. Is it, though?Copy !req
145. - Almost finished.
- Again?Copy !req
146. - Okay.
- This better be good.Copy !req
147. Where's everyone going?Copy !req
148. To fight crime?Copy !req
149. - Okay.
- Bye, Mom.Copy !req
150. - Bye, Mom.
- Bye, Mom.Copy !req
151. - Bye.
- Bye, Rosa.Copy !req
152. Give it time.Copy !req
153. You guys ready?Copy !req
154. Shazam!Copy !req
155. Oh, my God.Copy !req
156. It's gonna break!Copy !req
157. Run!Copy !req
158. I need a heroCopy !req
159. I'm holding out for a hero
Till the end of the nightCopy !req
160. He's...Copy !req
161. No, no, no.Copy !req
162. No way, shut up!Copy !req
163. Did I just save you
while you were listening to this song?Copy !req
164. No! I got you, I got you, I got you.Copy !req
165. No need to panic.Copy !req
166. Captain Everypower is here.Copy !req
167. I'm just kidding, it's real easy.Copy !req
168. Hi!Copy !req
169. Oh, my gosh. Kittens!Copy !req
170. Oh! They're so cute!Copy !req
171. Did she just leave us?Copy !req
172. Okay, let's go.Copy !req
173. - Okay.
- No, no, no, I got ya!Copy !req
174. That's my sidekick.Copy !req
175. Captain Everypower Junior.Copy !req
176. Hey! Junior?Copy !req
177. You're gonna wanna hold on tight.Copy !req
178. Everyone's safe.Copy !req
179. Awesome job, Mary.Copy !req
180. Circle up, fam!Copy !req
181. All right, here's the situation.Copy !req
182. We have one more job to do,Copy !req
183. and that's to keep this bridge
from collapsing.Copy !req
184. The Ben Franklin Bridge has collapsed.Copy !req
185. Fortunately, there are no casualties.Copy !req
186. Thanks in part to our local heroes,
one with me now.Copy !req
187. It's great to be here, Nancy.
What can I say?Copy !req
188. It's all in a day's work.Copy !req
189. Right. Well, how do you feel about
being dubbed the Philadelphia Fiascoes?Copy !req
190. Given that that's not an official title,
we feel nothing about it.Copy !req
191. That is not our name.Copy !req
192. Right, right, right.
But the important thing is...Copy !req
193. What is wrong with these people?Copy !req
194. Have you ever...Copy !req
195. I'm gonna go check on the kids.Copy !req
196. Yeah, you should.
God only knows what they're up to.Copy !req
197. Probably drugs, right?Copy !req
198. Probably taking selfies
while vaping on TikTok.Copy !req
199. Oh.Copy !req
200. Is that a kitten?Copy !req
201. "Destroy bridge"?Copy !req
202. What?Copy !req
203. Not saving is different than breaking.Copy !req
204. Am I wrong? Am I wrong about this?Copy !req
205. Also, we saved countless lives.Copy !req
206. A hundred sixty-two. It's countable.Copy !req
207. Emotionally countless, Mary.Copy !req
208. Where's Eugene?Copy !req
209. Where he always is.Copy !req
210. Mapping out the room of doors.Copy !req
211. Eugene!Copy !req
212. Hey, buddy! Where you at?Copy !req
213. Hey, Eugene.Copy !req
214. Hello? We have a meeting, Eugene.Copy !req
215. You're late.Copy !req
216. Do not go in there.Copy !req
217. All right, fam-jam, let's jump in.Copy !req
218. All right, big day,Copy !req
219. big bridge,Copy !req
220. kind of a couple blunders, right?Copy !req
221. But we're gonna meditate
on those mistakes right now.Copy !req
222. Organic chem is my meditation.Copy !req
223. Said nobody with friends ever, really.Copy !req
224. In point of fact, I'd have friendsCopy !req
225. if I had gone to college.Copy !req
226. "In point of fact" is exactly the kind ofCopy !req
227. smart thing that a smart person
who doesn't need to go to college says.Copy !req
228. So, let's go back to the tape.Copy !req
229. Now, guys, as you can see,Copy !req
230. we started off
real, real, real strong, right?Copy !req
231. Right up top,
all that cohesiveness, energy,Copy !req
232. terrific!Copy !req
233. Oh, sorry, coach.Copy !req
234. Gotta fly IRL.Copy !req
235. No, no, no, I'm not done
with the presentation.Copy !req
236. I know. And I love these daily recaps.Copy !req
237. I just gotta spread my wings a bit
before dinner.Copy !req
238. - It helps keep me loose!
- Okay, fine, fine. No recap.Copy !req
239. We'll go have a group hang in the air.
That sounds great.Copy !req
240. I gotta test this slime for toxicity
'cause I'm starting to tingle.Copy !req
241. Oh. The Phillies game just came onCopy !req
242. so I'm gonna go ahead and watch baseball.Copy !req
243. It's right that I give Tawny back.Copy !req
244. Oh, come on! What is happening?Copy !req
245. What is happening right now?
All or none, guys!Copy !req
246. If you say you have to work...Copy !req
247. I have to work.Copy !req
248. Why do you even have a job?Copy !req
249. Wonder Woman doesn't have a job!Copy !req
250. - Stop.
- No, seriously.Copy !req
251. Do you think she wears
a ponytail and glassesCopy !req
252. and, like, nobody recognizes herCopy !req
253. and she's, like,
an accountant or something?Copy !req
254. Just stop.Copy !req
255. You are holding on too tight.Copy !req
256. Just 'cause Freddy wants to fly solo
for ten minutesCopy !req
257. doesn't mean he's gonna
leave you like your mom.Copy !req
258. Or me wanting to go to collegeCopy !req
259. means I'm abandoning the family.Copy !req
260. Oh. Okay, cool, it's about college again.
I totally get it.Copy !req
261. Yeah.Copy !req
262. Do you really not see yourself?Copy !req
263. You turn 18 in five months.Copy !req
264. They're not gonna kick me out.
They didn't kick you out.Copy !req
265. Victor and Rosa are saints, yes,Copy !req
266. but you're about to age out
of the foster system just like I did.Copy !req
267. Yeah, I get it. I know how it works, okay?Copy !req
268. Do you?Copy !req
269. Victor and Rosa can barely pay rent.Copy !req
270. And the state no longer sends checks
to feed or house meCopy !req
271. and soon there will be no checks for you.Copy !req
272. I don't care if Wonder Woman has a job.Copy !req
273. I want to contribute.Copy !req
274. At some point, Billy, like,Copy !req
275. everyone on Earth,
we have to get a job or leave home.Copy !req
276. Nothing lasts forever.Copy !req
277. I mean, it's literally called
the Rock of Eternity.Copy !req
278. So, clearly, some things do last forever.Copy !req
279. Leave me to die.Copy !req
280. Oh. But we come bearing gifts.Copy !req
281. Magic.Copy !req
282. Impossible.Copy !req
283. This realm was sealed off from magic.Copy !req
284. Yes. After you ripped it
from our father's very core.Copy !req
285. From every god in this realm.Copy !req
286. From me.Copy !req
287. Do you not remember what you took?Copy !req
288. What my particular power was?Copy !req
289. The power of elements.Copy !req
290. No.Copy !req
291. I cast a barrier to prevent your kindCopy !req
292. from entering the human realm.Copy !req
293. The only way that barrier
could be removed is if...Copy !req
294. Someone broke this?Copy !req
295. How did...Copy !req
296. Where is the Champion?Copy !req
297. It was your hands that
forged this staff for our fatherCopy !req
298. and yours that will mend it.Copy !req
299. I told you,Copy !req
300. I would die before I help you.Copy !req
301. Now, say the word.Copy !req
302. Never. Never!Copy !req
303. Never say never.Copy !req
304. Say the word.Copy !req
305. Shazam!Copy !req
306. Now we get to have our fun.Copy !req
307. Fun is for children, dear.Copy !req
308. We are at war.Copy !req
309. - Oh, my gosh. I'm so sorry!
- Oh, my goodness. I am so sorry!Copy !req
310. No, don't be sorry. I'm sorry!Copy !req
311. No, it's totally my fault. Are you okay?Copy !req
312. - I'm okay, yeah. I'm always okay.
- Okay, yeah. Good.Copy !req
313. Actually, do you know where this is?Copy !req
314. Miss Saunders!Copy !req
315. Yeah, absolutelyCopy !req
316. is what I meant to say.
Voice crack. It's weird.Copy !req
317. Oh, no, no worries.
If it makes you feel any better,Copy !req
318. it's nothing compared to the amount
that you're blushing right now.Copy !req
319. Oh, I blush when I'm confident.Copy !req
320. There she is.Copy !req
321. - Hey.
- New girl. First period.Copy !req
322. - Yeah.
- I'm Brett. This is Burke.Copy !req
323. Listen, if you need anything at all,Copy !req
324. we're your guys. We got it.Copy !req
325. Brett and Burke Breyer.Copy !req
326. They got it all. I mean, what is it,Copy !req
327. narcissistic personality disorder,Copy !req
328. chlamydia, they got it.Copy !req
329. Plenty of it to go around, too.Copy !req
330. This is Thundercrack's Make-A-Wish kid.Copy !req
331. Fanboy here thinks he's a big boy now.Copy !req
332. Yeah, he doesn't know where he belongs.Copy !req
333. Sure I do.
I don't belong in that trash can.Copy !req
334. 'Cause that's...
I'll smell like human garbage,Copy !req
335. do you realize that?
And that's your brand, guys!Copy !req
336. Down goes Freeman.Copy !req
337. Hey, hey! Look!Copy !req
338. - Now I'm a superhero.
- Nice!Copy !req
339. What is this thing doing here?Copy !req
340. Janitors.Copy !req
341. Get up, man. What are you doin'? Come on.Copy !req
342. You're gonna want to get this fixed, huh?Copy !req
343. Yeah, that's probably why you fell.Copy !req
344. - Yeah.
- Bye, new girl.Copy !req
345. Jeez, thanks, Mr. Geckle.Copy !req
346. Don't sweat it. That trash canCopy !req
347. was like a second home to me
when I went here.Copy !req
348. Hey.Copy !req
349. You knew those guys were gonna hit you,Copy !req
350. but you stepped in anyway.Copy !req
351. You know something?
That's how I amuse myself.Copy !req
352. The funnier I am,Copy !req
353. the more I get punched.Copy !req
354. Well, it made me laugh.Copy !req
355. Hero.Copy !req
356. You gonna walk me to class or what?Copy !req
357. Why would I... Walk you to class? No.Copy !req
358. Why would I wanna do that? Yes!Copy !req
359. Thanks.Copy !req
360. So, from the top.Copy !req
361. What is Thundercrack's Make-A-Wish kid?Copy !req
362. Yeah. It's real inside baseball,
but basically,Copy !req
363. a while ago I happened to have some lunchCopy !req
364. in the cafeteria with a few superheroes.Copy !req
365. Wait, the kid who's friends
with superheroes.Copy !req
366. - That was you?
- Yeah.Copy !req
367. And they're still dicks to you?Copy !req
368. Sadly, just 'cause you know someone cool,
doesn't really necessarily make you cool.Copy !req
369. You seem pretty cool to me.Copy !req
370. Freddy!Copy !req
371. Is my name.Copy !req
372. Sorry, that was weird and loud.
I'm Freddy,Copy !req
373. he said in a normal voice.Copy !req
374. I'm Anne.Copy !req
375. Anne.Copy !req
376. - Nice!
- Bullseye.Copy !req
377. Hey, you gotta fix that crutch, bro!Copy !req
378. What?Copy !req
379. Good, little one.Copy !req
380. Well done.Copy !req
381. Now go find me
the one responsible for this.Copy !req
382. Wow.Copy !req
383. I'm flattered that you feel this way.Copy !req
384. Truly. I mean, you know, like,
look at all this, you know,Copy !req
385. romantic setting and fancy champagne,
big plates, tiny food.Copy !req
386. I mean, you went all out.Copy !req
387. I love that, I do.Copy !req
388. I'm just not sure that I'm really ready
to commit right now, you know?Copy !req
389. Wait, wait, wait.
No, this isn't about you.Copy !req
390. I promise this is not about you.
Okay? Look.Copy !req
391. I know the whole world
wants to see this happen.Copy !req
392. You and me.Copy !req
393. The dynamic duo. The hottie goddies.Copy !req
394. She-zam.Copy !req
395. I guess I'm just afraid that
I'm gonna let 'em all down.Copy !req
396. You know?Copy !req
397. That I'm gonna let you down.Copy !req
398. You know what? Screw it. Let's try.Copy !req
399. Let's try this crazy thing.Copy !req
400. Maybe we'llCopy !req
401. seal it with a kiss?Copy !req
402. Billy Batson!Copy !req
403. You are a fool of a champion.Copy !req
404. What the hell is going on?Copy !req
405. What happened to her beautiful face?Copy !req
406. Also, aren't you, like, dead-ass dead?Copy !req
407. I bring a warning from beyond your realm.Copy !req
408. The daughters of Atlas are coming for you.Copy !req
409. Daughters of Atlas?Copy !req
410. They're coming to unmake your worldCopy !req
411. and torture mankind for all eternityCopy !req
412. - in the Pit of Endless Agony.
- Okay, I feel like maybeCopy !req
413. I should be writing all this down.Copy !req
414. - Quiet!
- Okay, okay.Copy !req
415. You don't know what you've done.Copy !req
416. I regret ever choosing you.Copy !req
417. Because of you,Copy !req
418. the barrier between the world
has been brought down.Copy !req
419. They will be hunting for you now.
Hunting your family.Copy !req
420. Oh, they're coming. Listen to me, Billy.Copy !req
421. The fate of your world depends on it.Copy !req
422. One thing you absolutely must not allowCopy !req
423. the daughters of Atlas to do is...Copy !req
424. Hey, Freddy?Copy !req
425. Nope, over it. Done it.Copy !req
426. Check fraud? What, are you kidding me?Copy !req
427. Armored car heist?Copy !req
428. I think I got that in the bag.Copy !req
429. Shazam!Copy !req
430. Bon appétit.Copy !req
431. - Oh, hi! Yes, I mean, hi.
- Hi.Copy !req
432. You wanna show me where you were sitting
when it happened?Copy !req
433. Oh, yeah, of course. Totally.Copy !req
434. - Yeah. Follow me.
- Okay, yeah.Copy !req
435. So, basically, it's a table
down at the end.Copy !req
436. So, I was sitting, yeah.Copy !req
437. Basically, I was sitting right here,
and he was sittingCopy !req
438. right there.Copy !req
439. - Here?
- Right there, yeah.Copy !req
440. Oh, sorry. Overbearing brother.Copy !req
441. Oh, I have one of those. A sister.Copy !req
442. Always has to know where I am.Copy !req
443. Right.Copy !req
444. I feel that, clearly.Copy !req
445. Always thinks she knows better, too.Copy !req
446. Even when it's been
factually proven otherwise?Copy !req
447. Exactly. And it's not
that I don't love her.Copy !req
448. No, of course. It'd just be nice
not to have someone...Copy !req
449. Constantly breathing down your neck.Copy !req
450. - From the moment you wake up!
- 'Cause I'm not a kid anymore.Copy !req
451. No! I'm a month younger,
one month exactly.Copy !req
452. And do we have to do
every single thing together?Copy !req
453. Billy!Copy !req
454. What a coinkidink!Copy !req
455. I was just telling my friend AnneCopy !req
456. - what a great guy you are.
- We need to talk.Copy !req
457. We need to talk. This guy loves to talk.Copy !req
458. - He's a great talker.
- Freddy.Copy !req
459. I have to talk to him. I'll be right back.Copy !req
460. Okay.Copy !req
461. Wait, didn't you tell us
the wizard disintegrated?Copy !req
462. The skin peeled off his face.Copy !req
463. He turned into a literal pile of ash.Copy !req
464. - Yeah, seems definitive.
- I don't know.Copy !req
465. Yeah. Except now he's in my dreamsCopy !req
466. and, Freddy, he's trying
to give me a message.Copy !req
467. Could be astral projection powers.Copy !req
468. - What's that?
- Obi-Wan Kenobi-ing youCopy !req
469. - from the great beyond?
- That's it, I'm callingCopy !req
470. an emergency meeting after school.Copy !req
471. - I want you there.
- Where else am I gonna go?Copy !req
472. - What?
- Dude.Copy !req
473. Okay, first of all, I didn't explode it!Copy !req
474. All right? It was already like that and...Copy !req
475. What is that, the Tribune? It's fake news!Copy !req
476. Freddy, we only have one rule.Copy !req
477. - All or none.
- All or none.Copy !req
478. And it's a stupid rule, by the way.Copy !req
479. I have a girl talking to me, Billy.Copy !req
480. A girl. For the first time in my life!Copy !req
481. And I probably don't have
a shot in hell with this girl,Copy !req
482. but I'll never find outCopy !req
483. if you keep trying to control
everything I wanna do!Copy !req
484. Just be at the Rock, Freddy.Copy !req
485. Okay.Copy !req
486. By the way, she has a sister.Copy !req
487. Total control freak.Copy !req
488. I think you guys would get along.Copy !req
489. Think you'd love her, actually.Copy !req
490. Look, look, look. Fam,Copy !req
491. I know it sounds crazy.Copy !req
492. And obviously I don't know
exactly what this all means,Copy !req
493. but he was super aggroCopy !req
494. and super loud and he was
trying to warn us, I think.Copy !req
495. He was yelling about all thisCopy !req
496. wizard-y mumbo-jumbo
about realms and stuff.Copy !req
497. Do you have to talk so loud?Copy !req
498. Yeah, Mary, 'cause this is not that loud.Copy !req
499. I think this is a perfectly
acceptable indoor voice volume.Copy !req
500. What is the deal? Are you okay?Copy !req
501. - Yeah.
- Why do you have sunglasses on?Copy !req
502. Did you go to the eye doctor this morning?Copy !req
503. I don't know, it looks to me like
Mary did go to the eye doctor,Copy !req
504. but it was last night,
and she had a lot of fun.Copy !req
505. In point of fact, I did have a great time.Copy !req
506. I met other people my age,
and I enjoyed myself.Copy !req
507. You made friends at the eye doctor?Copy !req
508. No, she...Copy !req
509. Yeah. Can we get back on track?Copy !req
510. Listen, he's yelling at meCopy !req
511. and he's saying the daughters of AtlasCopy !req
512. are coming to hunt us.Copy !req
513. So, check out what I found.Copy !req
514. "The daughters of Atlas are
the offspring of the Titan Atlas,"Copy !req
515. which is obvious,Copy !req
516. but also Nyx,
the Goddess of Night and Death.Copy !req
517. Well, good things can happen at night.Copy !req
518. And death.Copy !req
519. Let me see this.Copy !req
520. "The daughters guard
the mythic Tree of LifeCopy !req
521. which grows golden apples
that contain the seeds of lifeCopy !req
522. which gave birth to their realmCopy !req
523. protected by aCopy !req
524. - dragon."
- Hey, now.Copy !req
525. And I am suddenly here for this.Copy !req
526. I know, right?Copy !req
527. 'Cause, like, on one hand,
totally terrifying.Copy !req
528. - On the other hand, dragon!
- Dragon!Copy !req
529. Mary. What are we doin'?Copy !req
530. I don't know, man. This is your meeting.Copy !req
531. Right, yes, fine, but we all
need to be on the same pageCopy !req
532. and, look,Copy !req
533. I often think that
you think better than me.Copy !req
534. The wizard did not exactly give me
a tutorial here, guys, okay?Copy !req
535. Like, I don't know
how a lot of this stuff works.Copy !req
536. That room of doors, or that violinCopy !req
537. that is, like, constantly burningCopy !req
538. which is super weird, but alsoCopy !req
539. definitely keeps the lair cozy, right?Copy !req
540. He didn't even tell me my superhero name.Copy !req
541. And it's not like I'm not tryin'.Copy !req
542. But I really, really need your help.Copy !req
543. I might know somebody that can help.Copy !req
544. Shut up. That lights up?Copy !req
545. Shut up.Copy !req
546. So, I'm mapping out the entire lair
and you withhold this?Copy !req
547. And you have really
been holding out on us.Copy !req
548. Jeez Louise, dude.Copy !req
549. "Whoa" what?Copy !req
550. - "Whoa" what?
- Look!Copy !req
551. Hey, Steve.Copy !req
552. What? You call the pen "Steve"?Copy !req
553. Yeah, I thought he looked like a "Steve."Copy !req
554. He totally looks like a "Steve."Copy !req
555. "Crime and Punishment,
a book report by Pedro Peña"?Copy !req
556. Yeah.Copy !req
557. Pedro.Copy !req
558. - Dude, that's cheating.
- I mean, he knows everything.Copy !req
559. Seriously. Ask him.Copy !req
560. You can just ask him stuff?Copy !req
561. - Pretty much.
- Slick. Okay, cool.Copy !req
562. Steve, we're looking for informationCopy !req
563. about the daughters of Atlas.Copy !req
564. Can you please help us with that?Copy !req
565. - These are book titles.
- Okay.Copy !req
566. Let's just all pick a book, or something.Copy !req
567. Where's Freddy? I mean, obscure mythology?Copy !req
568. Definitely his thing.Copy !req
569. I'm not even sure Freddy knows
what his thing is anymore.Copy !req
570. You know I've actually never been up here.Copy !req
571. Don't lie. This is where you hang out
with your superhero friends, isn't it?Copy !req
572. No, actually,
why would they ever come here?Copy !req
573. I mean, yes, they've driven by...Copy !req
574. Do you actually know those guys?Copy !req
575. Or is this, like,
a "Canadian girlfriend" situation?Copy !req
576. Oh, you mean Collette?Copy !req
577. Well, she and I aren't
really exclusive, as of now.Copy !req
578. Do you wanna meet one of them?Copy !req
579. Meet, like, how?Copy !req
580. Like, face-to-face, right now.Copy !req
581. I'm gonna take that as a yes.Copy !req
582. And today is your lucky day,Copy !req
583. because I'm gonna call the hot one.Copy !req
584. Her?Copy !req
585. No, the male hot one.Copy !req
586. Him?Copy !req
587. What? Him?Copy !req
588. Look, I mean, it's all subjective, right?Copy !req
589. But Captain Everypower usually
tops most online polls, so...Copy !req
590. It's no big deal.Copy !req
591. Is this a joke, Freddy?Copy !req
592. 'Cause I didn't mean to make you
actually prove it, really.Copy !req
593. No, it's not a joke.Copy !req
594. And I'm gonna call him right now.
I'm gonna call him right now.Copy !req
595. So, don't move. So, stay right there.Copy !req
596. Hey, Captain Everypower. What's goin' on?Copy !req
597. It's your boy Freddy. Yeah.Copy !req
598. Remember that time I saved your life?Copy !req
599. No, no, no, the other time.Copy !req
600. Yeah.Copy !req
601. Well, I'm calling in that favor.Copy !req
602. You must be Anne.Copy !req
603. Oh, my God.Copy !req
604. Friend of Freddy's, I hear.Copy !req
605. I am, actually. Yeah. How are you...Copy !req
606. You know, I may be
the one with the superpowers,Copy !req
607. but that kid,Copy !req
608. he's the real hero.Copy !req
609. Yeah. I mean, honestly,Copy !req
610. I've never met anyone like him.Copy !req
611. He's genuineCopy !req
612. and warm and funny.Copy !req
613. - That's a lot of nice things.
- Yeah.Copy !req
614. How did you two meet?Copy !req
615. Comic-Con.Copy !req
616. - What's Comic-Con?
- What?Copy !req
617. According to this,Copy !req
618. gods considered humans servants,
toys to be played with,Copy !req
619. children to be punished.Copy !req
620. Thanks, Steve.Copy !req
621. Until the rebellion,
when the humans turned on the gods.Copy !req
622. I'm reading about that right now.Copy !req
623. So, apparently, all of thisCopy !req
624. revolves around a powerful weapon.Copy !req
625. So, Atlas, the fatherCopy !req
626. of the daughters of Atlas, obviously,Copy !req
627. yeah, he crafted a quarterstaff
from the Tree of LifeCopy !req
628. and he used that staff
to give powers to certain deitiesCopy !req
629. but also to take powers away from others.Copy !req
630. So, the staff's where Atlas
stored all supernatural power.Copy !req
631. Yes, exactly.
It's like a battery for magic.Copy !req
632. But when things got bad,Copy !req
633. a council of human wizards got togetherCopy !req
634. and they stole the staff from Atlas.Copy !req
635. And they used that
to take his powers away.Copy !req
636. And once they had his magic,
they went after other gods...Copy !req
637. Guys, that's the wizard! I know this guy.Copy !req
638. This is the wizard that I know!Copy !req
639. What do these say?Copy !req
640. "The Wisdom of Solomon,Copy !req
641. Strength of Hercules, Stamina of Atlas,Copy !req
642. Power of Zeus, Courage of Achilles,
Speed of Mercury."Copy !req
643. These are the powers they stole.Copy !req
644. Guys, look!Copy !req
645. This is what the name means.Copy !req
646. Which is way cooler
than what I thought it was,Copy !req
647. which is just a bunch
of hot garbage, so...Copy !req
648. If I may point out one of the powersCopy !req
649. that may be possibly MIA. Boop.Copy !req
650. I'm sorry,Copy !req
651. are you very unsubtly implying
that I somehow lack the wisdom ofCopy !req
652. - Solo Man?
- Yeah.Copy !req
653. Well, maybe it comes later.Copy !req
654. I mean, you do usually
ask Mary what to do.Copy !req
655. - I'm just saying.
- Yeah.Copy !req
656. This is very, very hurtful.Copy !req
657. I just want you all to know that.Copy !req
658. And it's pronounced "Solomon."Copy !req
659. Oh.Copy !req
660. What else have we learned, fam?Copy !req
661. Well, once the staff
contained the powers of the gods,Copy !req
662. the wizards apparently
encased the God RealmCopy !req
663. in some magical sphereCopy !req
664. sealing it away forever.Copy !req
665. Cut off from magic.Copy !req
666. Oh, so that's what that was about.Copy !req
667. Yeah, I don't think that
they are so cut off anymore.Copy !req
668. A bizarre and gruesome scene unfolded
in Athens, Greece this morning.Copy !req
669. Two women dressed in
what appears to be ancient Greek...Copy !req
670. That's the wizard's staff.Copy !req
671. How did they get that?Copy !req
672. So, all those statues used to be people.Copy !req
673. I'm wondering,
how did the staff end up in Europe,Copy !req
674. where Greece is at?Copy !req
675. Oh, gee-whiz, mister,
sorry I took your cane.Copy !req
676. You want it back?Copy !req
677. I mean, I did break it in half
and then throw it away.Copy !req
678. So, that's probably
where the journey started.Copy !req
679. - You know?
- What?Copy !req
680. What do you mean, "What"? What?Copy !req
681. - You just left it there?
- We were all there.Copy !req
682. Guys, I had a staff.
I gave you all superpowers.Copy !req
683. You're welcome, by the way.Copy !req
684. And then I had to break it in half
so Sivana didn't doCopy !req
685. super bad-guy stuff with it, okay?Copy !req
686. You broke the staff,Copy !req
687. meaning you broke the barrier
between worlds.Copy !req
688. Which we now know.Copy !req
689. We also now know what they look like,Copy !req
690. so when they come to hunt us,
we'll see those two coming a...Copy !req
691. Three.Copy !req
692. What?Copy !req
693. Atlas had three daughters.Copy !req
694. Kalypso, Hespera,Copy !req
695. Anthea.Copy !req
696. Anne-thea.Copy !req
697. You know, I'm not just a superhero.Copy !req
698. I'm a super listener.Copy !req
699. And I senseCopy !req
700. that you may have feelings for Freddy.Copy !req
701. Just wanna know when he's coming back.Copy !req
702. Don't want him to get hurt.Copy !req
703. Oh, well, Anne. I mean, we can't chooseCopy !req
704. the people we fall for.Copy !req
705. What?Copy !req
706. I'm not talking about that.Copy !req
707. If he shows up now,
he's in serious danger.Copy !req
708. Look who you're with.Copy !req
709. What could possibly be dangerous?Copy !req
710. Okay.Copy !req
711. I see how it is.Copy !req
712. Let's dance.Copy !req
713. Oh, my God.Copy !req
714. Freddy?Copy !req
715. Oh, Freddy, I didn't know.Copy !req
716. I never meant for you to get hurt.Copy !req
717. Oh, I'm not the one who's gonna get hurt.Copy !req
718. Shazam!Copy !req
719. Shazam!Copy !req
720. Shazam.Copy !req
721. What's going on up here?Copy !req
722. Freddy, are you all right?Copy !req
723. Get back inside.
Just get back inside, Mr. Geckle.Copy !req
724. I'm okay. Go back inside.Copy !req
725. Who are you? Do you have kids here?Copy !req
726. What are you doing? Don't hurt him.Copy !req
727. I won't touch him. You have my word.Copy !req
728. Mr. G.Copy !req
729. What did she say? What are you doing?Copy !req
730. What are you doing?Copy !req
731. What are you... No, no, no!Copy !req
732. Stop, stop, stop! Wait, wait, wait!
Hey, no, no, no!Copy !req
733. Wait, no, no, no! No! No, no, no!Copy !req
734. I forgot how easily they burst.Copy !req
735. Why would you do that?Copy !req
736. Like grapes.Copy !req
737. What the...Copy !req
738. Now, child, tell us
where to find the others.Copy !req
739. No need.Copy !req
740. Clip his wings, Anthea.Copy !req
741. Wait.Copy !req
742. There are more.Copy !req
743. - Perfect. We take them all.
- No.Copy !req
744. That's not why we're here.Copy !req
745. We're here for the seed of life.
Yield, sister.Copy !req
746. We stick to the plan we have.Copy !req
747. Father would never yield.Copy !req
748. And Father is dead.Copy !req
749. Now, you know your place, sister.Copy !req
750. Or I will show it to you.Copy !req
751. We do this our way, not theirs.Copy !req
752. Make one move,Copy !req
753. and I will snap this child's neck.Copy !req
754. Oh, Freddy.Copy !req
755. Billy, no!Copy !req
756. Billy, stay back!Copy !req
757. They're using the staff
to take our powers.Copy !req
758. What? What?Copy !req
759. Sorry!Copy !req
760. I'm sorry.Copy !req
761. I'm sorry, just save yourself.Copy !req
762. No, no, all or none. We stick together.Copy !req
763. And that you will,Copy !req
764. because you cannot leave.Copy !req
765. Let's see how you likeCopy !req
766. being sealed off in a dying world.Copy !req
767. No!Copy !req
768. Freddy!Copy !req
769. From City Line Avenue in the northCopy !req
770. to the western shore
of the Schuylkill RiverCopy !req
771. to Cobbs Creek.Copy !req
772. The unidentified barrier appears to be
in the shape of a domeCopy !req
773. with no one allowed into the city or outCopy !req
774. with some suggesting
this strange magical elementCopy !req
775. may be the doing, or undoing,
of the Philadelphia Fiascoes.Copy !req
776. Holy...Copy !req
777. I'm trying to sleep.Copy !req
778. It is the only escape
from the tortures here.Copy !req
779. Okay. Bleak.Copy !req
780. Wait a second.Copy !req
781. Hagrid beard, Batman voice.Copy !req
782. You're the wizard.
You're the wizard! Oh, my...Copy !req
783. You're back! Billy told me all about you.Copy !req
784. Billy? You know Billy Batson?Copy !req
785. Billy Batson. Yeah, he's my best friend.Copy !req
786. I'm Freddy Freeman, Captain Everypower.Copy !req
787. Well, used to be. It's complicated now.Copy !req
788. She... It's complicated.Copy !req
789. That halfwit Billy gave you
the powers of Shazam?Copy !req
790. Yeah, he did. And he said that
you turned into ash but didn't?Copy !req
791. Once I gave him the power,Copy !req
792. I could no longer remain in my realm.Copy !req
793. But death would have been a luxuryCopy !req
794. compared to being trapped in this cellCopy !req
795. with the knowledge of my failure,
and with you.Copy !req
796. Mostly with you.Copy !req
797. A little more sarcastic than Billy said,
but, hey, all good.Copy !req
798. - Let's just get out of here.
- "Let's just get out of here."Copy !req
799. Yeah, sure.Copy !req
800. I sound nothing like that, but okay.Copy !req
801. Here's what we've got.Copy !req
802. A cranky wizard with a cynical streakCopy !req
803. and a precocious young man
with an encyclopedic knowledgeCopy !req
804. regarding magical shit.Copy !req
805. There is no way
these sisters are keeping us in here.Copy !req
806. These prison bars,
they're probably enchanted!Copy !req
807. - What spells do you know?
- Please, stop talking.Copy !req
808. How about an arcane focus?Copy !req
809. I don't even know what that is.Copy !req
810. Fine, then let's make a potion.Copy !req
811. Like a potion of giant strength
or diminution.Copy !req
812. Oh! Gaseous form!Copy !req
813. Yeah! Maybe we could
float out of here like a fart.Copy !req
814. I gave my powers to children
who squandered it.Copy !req
815. We will die here, Freeby.Copy !req
816. It's Freddy, by the way.
"Freeby"? Where do you even...Copy !req
817. The sooner you accept it,Copy !req
818. the easier it will be.Copy !req
819. Is this a tooth? There's a tooth in here!Copy !req
820. "Power of elements. Power of chaos.Copy !req
821. Power of axis."Copy !req
822. These are primordial forces.Copy !req
823. I don't know
how we fight powers like this.Copy !req
824. I tell you how we fight it.Copy !req
825. With the wisdom of...Copy !req
826. - Solomon.
- Exactly.Copy !req
827. We set up a meeting.Copy !req
828. Yeah, we tell 'em we want to negotiate.Copy !req
829. Offer up our powers for Freddy.Copy !req
830. But then we grab one of them
and that's what we really use to trade!Copy !req
831. But what if they steal our powers?Copy !req
832. No, they won't,
'cause we know how they work now.Copy !req
833. You know what I mean?
If they just point that staff at us,Copy !req
834. we dodge.Copy !req
835. Like dodgeball.Copy !req
836. Dude, I suck at dodgeball.Copy !req
837. Well, maybe Pedro sucks at dodgeball,Copy !req
838. but not Super Pedro.Copy !req
839. No, Super Pedro also sucks at dodgeball.Copy !req
840. Fine. Listen, all I knowCopy !req
841. is that there's five of us
and three of them.Copy !req
842. So, I think we should send them
a little invitation.Copy !req
843. Okay.Copy !req
844. So, Steve says that this paperCopy !req
845. is a stack of magical parchment.Copy !req
846. You write a message on the magical paperCopy !req
847. and say the name of the god
that you would like to talk toCopy !req
848. and then the paper folds into a...Copy !req
849. Oh, my God, yes!Copy !req
850. A paper bird.Copy !req
851. And it flies to the god.Copy !req
852. Well, that's kinda cute.Copy !req
853. Hey, what about demigods?
You know, like, Wonder Woman?Copy !req
854. Do you think she's accepting
bird letters right now?Copy !req
855. Did the pen just shrug?Copy !req
856. Hey, Steve, do I just dictate to...Copy !req
857. I do. Okay, cool, wad that up.Copy !req
858. All right.Copy !req
859. Letter.Copy !req
860. Letter, writing a letter. No, no, no!Copy !req
861. I was just talking out loud.Copy !req
862. That's not a part of the letter.
Wad that up, too.Copy !req
863. Maybe if you tryCopy !req
864. speaking from the heart.Copy !req
865. "Dear daughters of Atlas,Copy !req
866. violence is not the answer."Copy !req
867. Child,Copy !req
868. I will spare your life
if you're honest with me.Copy !req
869. Honesty.Copy !req
870. Yeah, wow, very ironic subject choice.Copy !req
871. The other Champions,Copy !req
872. are they children like yourself?Copy !req
873. What even is a child?Copy !req
874. I mean, I know I shave,
like, every week-ish.Copy !req
875. Yes or no?Copy !req
876. No. Your answer is no
because nobody's stupid enoughCopy !req
877. to grant primordial god-like powers
to a bunch of kids.Copy !req
878. - Give us their names.
- The names of the Champions?Copy !req
879. Well, there's Brett Breyer
and Burke Breyer.Copy !req
880. Are you guys taking this stuff in?Copy !req
881. Writing this down? No?Copy !req
882. They drive a Dodge Ram.Copy !req
883. He's lying.Copy !req
884. That's your superpower, not mine.Copy !req
885. And she thinks
you're a total control freak.Copy !req
886. One of you.Copy !req
887. Probably you.Copy !req
888. Hold him.Copy !req
889. Don't... What's happening?Copy !req
890. What is that? What's she doing?Copy !req
891. Power of chaos.Copy !req
892. It enters a man's mind
and shatters it whole.Copy !req
893. Oh. My mind is already trash,Copy !req
894. so I'd actually like to see you try.Copy !req
895. Because nobody has the ballsCopy !req
896. to handle what's inside my brain.Copy !req
897. Say their names.Copy !req
898. Say their names.Copy !req
899. Destiny's Child did it better.Copy !req
900. He is stronger than he looks.Copy !req
901. - Say their names.
- Stop!Copy !req
902. Billy...Copy !req
903. Billy Bats...Copy !req
904. Billy...Copy !req
905. Stop.Copy !req
906. This is from the Champions.Copy !req
907. "Dear daughters of Atlas,Copy !req
908. violence is not the answer.Copy !req
909. Oh, good first sentence. Thanks, Darla.Copy !req
910. - We'd like to make a trade."
- What?Copy !req
911. "We'll give up our powersCopy !req
912. if you give us Freddy, add 'unharmed.'Copy !req
913. Otherwise, they're gonna monkey's-paw you.Copy !req
914. Smart, Eugene.Copy !req
915. Steve, add 'unharmed'
then, like, 'Yours, trul...'Copy !req
916. No, 'Sincerely, best.'Copy !req
917. Maybe just signed 'The Champions.'Copy !req
918. Should we proofread it?Copy !req
919. Naw, Steve doesn't make mistakes,
just writes what you say.Copy !req
920. Great. I feel good about this. Me, too.Copy !req
921. Anyone else want a Gatorade?Copy !req
922. Do we have red?"Copy !req
923. What is this Gatorade?Copy !req
924. - Is it a weapon?
- Sister.Copy !req
925. We need not torture him any longer.Copy !req
926. You heard the letter.Copy !req
927. - Throw them in the pit.
- Wait.Copy !req
928. They want to make a trade.Copy !req
929. And we will meet, sister.Copy !req
930. But humans are not to be trusted.Copy !req
931. The pit is just a bad name
for a fun place, right?Copy !req
932. Right?Copy !req
933. Are you hurt?Copy !req
934. No, just worthless.Copy !req
935. - Well, you must get up.
- For what?Copy !req
936. All this pretending
to be a superhero is justCopy !req
937. a way for me to pretend I'm not broken.Copy !req
938. Oh, feelings.Copy !req
939. - I see something moving.
- Yeah, I see it, too.Copy !req
940. Oh, shit.Copy !req
941. What is that?Copy !req
942. Ladon.Copy !req
943. The guardian of the Garden of Atlas.Copy !req
944. - Run.
- I can't. I can't!Copy !req
945. You're okay! You're okay.Copy !req
946. I don't feel okay at all.Copy !req
947. That's the power of the dragon.Copy !req
948. It emanates fear
from every pore of its body.Copy !req
949. Ladon's fear paralyzes any mortalCopy !req
950. so that none can approach
the garden it protects.Copy !req
951. Power of axis. Very cool,Copy !req
952. - very rare.
- Anthea!Copy !req
953. I must go.Copy !req
954. The door back to your world is
at the center of the labyrinth.Copy !req
955. Right, left, leftCopy !req
956. and then follow the right-hand wall
to the center.Copy !req
957. - You'll need this.
- How did you find this?Copy !req
958. You once protected me from the bullies
in your world, Freddy Freeman.Copy !req
959. Now I've protected you in mine.Copy !req
960. Hero.Copy !req
961. Well, to be fair, I didn't
actually need your protection.Copy !req
962. I was about to rearrange those boys'
internal organs when you stepped in.Copy !req
963. But you didn't know that,
which does make you brave.Copy !req
964. I was just brave because
I knew I had powers.Copy !req
965. No, the most powerful thing
about you is you.Copy !req
966. How lovely for both of you.Copy !req
967. Goddess, we thank you much, but we must...Copy !req
968. You should go.
My sisters don't need you anymore.Copy !req
969. All they require now is the seed.Copy !req
970. - The seed?
- Yes.Copy !req
971. Which remains hidden
in a place unreachableCopy !req
972. by any of their kind.
Come, come, Jeff. Faster.Copy !req
973. Did you just call me Jeff?
She just said my entire name!Copy !req
974. Hi, God... No?Copy !req
975. Yo, Low Voltage.Copy !req
976. When you fixing this dome shit, man?Copy !req
977. Oh, no, no, no, don't worry, sir.Copy !req
978. I have a plan.Copy !req
979. Really?Copy !req
980. 'Cause look like all you got
is a sandwich.Copy !req
981. No, these sandwiches?Copy !req
982. No, these sandwiches are important.Copy !req
983. They're for a meeting.Copy !req
984. Yeah, sure, Colonel Cheesesteak.Copy !req
985. Colonel?Copy !req
986. Oh, boy, I really need a name.Copy !req
987. Quiet one, she is.Copy !req
988. I find it the most effective way
to slit an enemy's throat.Copy !req
989. Is that...Copy !req
990. Oh, you're totally serious. Okay.Copy !req
991. Right, so, look, here's the thing.
You're upset.Copy !req
992. A bunch of wizards came
and stole your powers,Copy !req
993. which totally sucks balls,
I totally get it.Copy !req
994. But I kind of feel like
you're taking this all,Copy !req
995. like, really personally and, like,
I don't even know you, lady, right?Copy !req
996. If thieves stormed your home in the night
and stole all your coin and then fled,Copy !req
997. you would naturally give chase,
would you not?Copy !req
998. And say, in this pursuit, the thievesCopy !req
999. dropped the money on the groundCopy !req
1000. and your neighbor picked it up
and kept it.Copy !req
1001. Now, imagine it is not moneyCopy !req
1002. but the lifeblood of your father,
the last breath of your mother,Copy !req
1003. the power of all the gods,Copy !req
1004. the magic of the entire realm
that was stolen.Copy !req
1005. And now this magic courses through you,Copy !req
1006. and you have the gallCopy !req
1007. to believe that you deserve it?Copy !req
1008. This is very personal,Copy !req
1009. Billy.Copy !req
1010. You are very menacing.Copy !req
1011. I just want you to know that.
Like, I really...Copy !req
1012. I see the presence that you have,
and that goes a long way.Copy !req
1013. But today, I really wanted
to talk about compromise.Copy !req
1014. There is no compromise.Copy !req
1015. I knew you were gonna say that.Copy !req
1016. Wisdom of Saruman.
Don't mess with me, okay?Copy !req
1017. Give us back Freddy,Copy !req
1018. you take down this
sphere-y dome-y magic bowl thingCopy !req
1019. and then, you know,Copy !req
1020. we won't have to annihilate you
into the ground.Copy !req
1021. It's a good offer. I'm being serious.Copy !req
1022. You play the part of a man,Copy !req
1023. but you do not play it well.Copy !req
1024. Give us the powers, child.Copy !req
1025. All of them.Copy !req
1026. You are no leader, Billy.Copy !req
1027. You are a lost boyCopy !req
1028. who likes to make-believe
that he's a warrior.Copy !req
1029. Okay, look. I might not have
as much experience as youCopy !req
1030. 'cause I'm not, like, super old like you,Copy !req
1031. but I think I have a few experiences
that you don't have.Copy !req
1032. 'Cause I've seen all
of the Fast and the Furious movies, lady.Copy !req
1033. And let me tell you something.Copy !req
1034. It's all about family!Copy !req
1035. Family!Copy !req
1036. Guys, that was the signal.
We practiced this, like, 12 times.Copy !req
1037. Thank you.Copy !req
1038. Forgot all about my family,
didn't you, Goddess?Copy !req
1039. No, human. You forgot about mine.Copy !req
1040. Come on!Copy !req
1041. - Let's go.
- Pedro!Copy !req
1042. You're wasting my time, boy.Copy !req
1043. Yeah.Copy !req
1044. She sure didn't see that comingCopy !req
1045. because she didn't go to the eye doctor.Copy !req
1046. Darla, that was, 'cause...Copy !req
1047. A euphemism. It was a euphemism.Copy !req
1048. No!Copy !req
1049. We've taken the power from two
in your family already.Copy !req
1050. And now two more must die, and for what?Copy !req
1051. So you can keep playing soldier?Copy !req
1052. My father was Atlas.Copy !req
1053. Titan god of stamina and strength.Copy !req
1054. His magic and power
may course through you,Copy !req
1055. but you will never be a true god.Copy !req
1056. Oh, yeah? Did your dad have superspeed?Copy !req
1057. Nope!Copy !req
1058. You okay? That was fun. Let's go.Copy !req
1059. Come on. Come on, come on.Copy !req
1060. Hurry, everyone!Copy !req
1061. Let's go, let's go.Copy !req
1062. What?Copy !req
1063. You thought you were just goin'
into some regular porta-potty, didn't ya?Copy !req
1064. Which I can somehow still smell.Copy !req
1065. Yeah, yeah, it really sticks around.
It's crazy, right?Copy !req
1066. - Yeah.
- Like, permeates the air.Copy !req
1067. Doesn't matter. Anyway,Copy !req
1068. welcome to the Rock of Eternity.Copy !req
1069. Only ChampionsCopy !req
1070. can get in here,
through any door that we want.Copy !req
1071. Little thing that we can do
that your sisters can't.Copy !req
1072. Guys, that's what I call a total success.Copy !req
1073. Okay, maybe, like, a partial total win.Copy !req
1074. - Told you I suck at dodgeball.
- Yeah.Copy !req
1075. You do, yeah, but you know,
look, Pedro, we all have our weak spots.Copy !req
1076. You know what I mean?Copy !req
1077. And hers,Copy !req
1078. lack of strategic thinking.Copy !req
1079. Now, for the real trade.Copy !req
1080. Freddy and the staff, for your freedom.Copy !req
1081. - And get rid of the dome.
- Oh, yeah.Copy !req
1082. And get rid of the dome.Copy !req
1083. 'Cause the city of brotherly love
is gettin' a little moist.Copy !req
1084. Word choice, man.Copy !req
1085. Yeah, I regretted it as soon as
it was coming out of my mouth.Copy !req
1086. - It's just one of those words...
- I know. I just...Copy !req
1087. "Dear daughters of Asshat-Las."Copy !req
1088. Burn!Copy !req
1089. I just came up with that.Copy !req
1090. Make sure you put a dash in there, though,Copy !req
1091. so it's really clear. Okay.Copy !req
1092. Man, it's so good
having Steve cover grammarCopy !req
1093. and spelling and stuff,
it makes me sound so much smarter.Copy !req
1094. "A brother for a sister, huh?Copy !req
1095. How's that feel?Copy !req
1096. Also, how are you actually sisters,Copy !req
1097. because the age difference
is very noticeableCopy !req
1098. and slightly upsetting,
I'm not gonna lie."Copy !req
1099. Even though I don't like you very much,
I believe everyone deserves human rights,Copy !req
1100. but you don't deserve strawberry.
You only get yellow.Copy !req
1101. She's gone!Copy !req
1102. Wait, what?Copy !req
1103. I thought we brought her in too easily.
She wanted to get caught.Copy !req
1104. I don't get it. Where would she even go?Copy !req
1105. Well, this seemed inevitable.Copy !req
1106. Yep. We are so lost. Thanks, bozo.Copy !req
1107. We are not lost. Who's the wizard here?Copy !req
1108. I don't know.Copy !req
1109. You don't have any spells,
no magical artifacts,Copy !req
1110. you know nothing about magic,
you're just...Copy !req
1111. You're the wizard.Copy !req
1112. - Thank you.
- Whatever.Copy !req
1113. Now, let's see if thatCopy !req
1114. girlfriend of yours can be trusted.Copy !req
1115. Get back, get back. Get back, get back.Copy !req
1116. Okay, I think the coast is clear.
Let's go home.Copy !req
1117. One moment.Copy !req
1118. Did you not see what she was holding?Copy !req
1119. It was an apple. She wanted a snack.
What's the big deal?Copy !req
1120. The golden apple. From the Tree of Life.Copy !req
1121. From the Tree of Life.Copy !req
1122. Oh. Wait, hold up, didn't you say
that was somewhere safe?Copy !req
1123. - Billy!
- Billy. Gosh.Copy !req
1124. Where are you going now?Copy !req
1125. Nope.Copy !req
1126. She's not in there.Copy !req
1127. Nope, nope. No, no, no.
That's a hard pass.Copy !req
1128. - That's a hard pass.
- Yo, Billy,Copy !req
1129. you don't gotta worry about that one.Copy !req
1130. It's just a labyrinth
that doesn't go anywhere.Copy !req
1131. - Like an ancient Greek labyrinth?
- Guys.Copy !req
1132. Porta-potty.Copy !req
1133. Hespera.Copy !req
1134. It's over, sisters.Copy !req
1135. Now we can plant the seed
and restore our realm.Copy !req
1136. Or we plant it in their realm.Copy !req
1137. But that would destroy their world.Copy !req
1138. Just as they destroyed ours.Copy !req
1139. You can't be serious.Copy !req
1140. - Yes.
- No.Copy !req
1141. No, that's not what we agreed to.Copy !req
1142. Anthea, you simpering bore.Copy !req
1143. She's right, we've spent ages
waiting for this moment.Copy !req
1144. We have the seed.
We have the staff and its powers.Copy !req
1145. We are not squandering it
for your personal satisfaction.Copy !req
1146. No, I should go, not you.Copy !req
1147. Look, I know what you're thinking.Copy !req
1148. The kid with the crutch
doesn't exactly sing "sneak thief."Copy !req
1149. But here's the deal.Copy !req
1150. Your knees crack like crazy when you walk.Copy !req
1151. It's pathetic.Copy !req
1152. See?Copy !req
1153. Fortune be with you, Freddy.Copy !req
1154. Thank you. What did you just call me?Copy !req
1155. Freddy. Freddy Freeman.Copy !req
1156. That's it. You nailed it.Copy !req
1157. I'll see you on the other side.Copy !req
1158. Even if we did, the Tree of Life
would not thrive in their soil.Copy !req
1159. It would despoil,
it would disfigure into something...Copy !req
1160. Monstrous?Copy !req
1161. That is what humans are.Copy !req
1162. It is only fitting that we bring
our monsters to their worldCopy !req
1163. and do to them as they did to us.Copy !req
1164. We agreed to restore balanceCopy !req
1165. and vengeance has great measure of weight
on those scales.Copy !req
1166. Anthea, humans are villains,
even to themselves.Copy !req
1167. - No, not all.
- All.Copy !req
1168. Sister, I fear your rage
has gotten the better of you.Copy !req
1169. Why?Copy !req
1170. Humans wreak havoc and devastation,Copy !req
1171. then pray to the gods to absolve them.Copy !req
1172. They actually pray for order and peaceCopy !req
1173. when all they do
is dismantle it at every turn.Copy !req
1174. Anthea, I want you to take the apple
and plant it in our garden.Copy !req
1175. Of course you turn to her.Copy !req
1176. Father would be ashamed of both of you.Copy !req
1177. Where did that even come from?Copy !req
1178. - Hi!
- You favor her, Hespera,Copy !req
1179. and see how she betrays us.Copy !req
1180. Deliver him to his proper fate, sister.Copy !req
1181. - No!
- Kill him!Copy !req
1182. What is that?Copy !req
1183. Great question. No idea.Copy !req
1184. But made you look.Copy !req
1185. Billy!Copy !req
1186. Oh.Copy !req
1187. Your crutch!Copy !req
1188. Shazam!Copy !req
1189. - Yes!
- No!Copy !req
1190. So, we have a lot to talk about.Copy !req
1191. Kalypso, hand me the staff.Copy !req
1192. You are not fit to wield it.Copy !req
1193. More fit than you.Copy !req
1194. You had him in your hands yet did nothing.Copy !req
1195. Our sole purpose is to avenge our father,Copy !req
1196. but everyone here has become weak.Copy !req
1197. Ladon, world-eater,Copy !req
1198. rise from the pit!Copy !req
1199. Go, go, go!Copy !req
1200. - Captain Everypower! Where's he going?
- What the...Copy !req
1201. Victor?Copy !req
1202. Victor, wake up.Copy !req
1203. Hello. Oh, God, woman. What?Copy !req
1204. Dad, we gotta go!Copy !req
1205. - We gotta get out of here.
- We have to go right now!Copy !req
1206. This is funny, right?
I know what this looks like.Copy !req
1207. That's not true.
I have no idea what this looks like.Copy !req
1208. Just don't freak out.Copy !req
1209. I said, don't freak out!
Look at me, it's Billy.Copy !req
1210. Rosa, it's Billy, okay? And that's Eugene,Copy !req
1211. - and that's Freddy...
- It's me.Copy !req
1212. that's Darla and that's Mary, obvi,Copy !req
1213. and then Pedro, just normal Pedro.Copy !req
1214. Guys, this is no time for secrets, okay?
We have to tell 'em the truth.Copy !req
1215. - We're superheroes.
- I'm gay.Copy !req
1216. Yeah, we know, bud.Copy !req
1217. - You knew?
- Yeah.Copy !req
1218. - Yeah.
- Oh.Copy !req
1219. - I'm the wizard.
- Oh, this is the wizard.Copy !req
1220. He's a wizard who's called "the wizard."Copy !req
1221. Okay, get dressed right now.
Come on, come on, come on, hurry up.Copy !req
1222. You gotta put on these clothes.Copy !req
1223. This is so weird.Copy !req
1224. Yep, yep.Copy !req
1225. You guys are the Philly Fiascoes?Copy !req
1226. Okay. This is in no way an acknowledgementCopy !req
1227. of that stupid nickname,Copy !req
1228. but, yes, that would be us.
Now, can you pick up the pace?Copy !req
1229. We have to go. The dragon is here!Copy !req
1230. Dragon?Copy !req
1231. You okay?Copy !req
1232. Okay.Copy !req
1233. I know this is a lot to take in,
but I promise to explain it all later.Copy !req
1234. Explain what?Copy !req
1235. That our kids are superheroes
being hunted by Greek godsCopy !req
1236. that used a dragon
to destroy the house we just bought?Copy !req
1237. - Yeah.
- Wait, you bought the house?Copy !req
1238. Yeah.Copy !req
1239. Run! Go!Copy !req
1240. Oh, no.Copy !req
1241. Get down.Copy !req
1242. Okay, that's it!Copy !req
1243. Again?Copy !req
1244. Freddy!Copy !req
1245. Hey, hey! This is what you want, right?Copy !req
1246. Come on, we're good. We're good.Copy !req
1247. We're safe right now. Let's go. Let's go.Copy !req
1248. No.Copy !req
1249. Hey. Are you okay?Copy !req
1250. You okay?Copy !req
1251. All right.Copy !req
1252. Now, where is this dragon?Copy !req
1253. Fitting place for a garden.Copy !req
1254. Go! Let's go, let's go!Copy !req
1255. Oh, God, I'm slipping! Slipping!Copy !req
1256. My shoe!Copy !req
1257. Holy moly.Copy !req
1258. You know, I never thought
I'd say this about a dragon,Copy !req
1259. but it is the least
of our problems right now.Copy !req
1260. Your world will not survive this.Copy !req
1261. Yeah, no shit, Merlin!Copy !req
1262. He's right.Copy !req
1263. Anne!Copy !req
1264. - Are you okay? Are you hurt?
- I'm okay, I'm fine.Copy !req
1265. In the God Realm, this treeCopy !req
1266. is a thing of beauty.Copy !req
1267. Of peace.Copy !req
1268. It was not meant
for the soil of this realmCopy !req
1269. and it's become monstrous
by the hand that planted it.Copy !req
1270. Whose side is she on, anyway? Do you...Copy !req
1271. I must try to sway Hespera.Copy !req
1272. Only she can subdue our sister.Copy !req
1273. I will give it my all, or die trying.Copy !req
1274. Die? No, I'm pretty sureCopy !req
1275. we can come up with
an alternative to dying.Copy !req
1276. My sweet Freddy, I'm ready if need be.Copy !req
1277. I've lived a long life.Copy !req
1278. What are you talking about,
"Lived a long life"?Copy !req
1279. We're the same age.
You're young. We're young.Copy !req
1280. I'm over 6,000 years old.Copy !req
1281. You look great.Copy !req
1282. Suddenly seems inappropriate.Copy !req
1283. Yeah.Copy !req
1284. We can't let her die. She called me sweet!Copy !req
1285. We have to figure something out.Copy !req
1286. Take my powers back.Copy !req
1287. - No, Billy!
- No, no, no.Copy !req
1288. Hey, hey, take my powers back.Copy !req
1289. You gave 'em to me,
so you can take 'em back, right?Copy !req
1290. I am no longer the Champion. You are!Copy !req
1291. You think I know how to fix this, dude,
but I really don't, okay?Copy !req
1292. I didn't even know
who those Greek sisters were.Copy !req
1293. I had to Google them.
But you know who they are,Copy !req
1294. which means you know what to do.Copy !req
1295. And you were right.Copy !req
1296. You picked the wrong champion, man.Copy !req
1297. I mean, that's why
I always say "all or none," right?Copy !req
1298. Because without my family, I'm nothing.Copy !req
1299. And honestly,
I have no idea what I'm doin'.Copy !req
1300. No.Copy !req
1301. You don't have a shred of wisdom
in that brain of yours.Copy !req
1302. But your heart is wise.Copy !req
1303. And it knows exactly what must be done.Copy !req
1304. I spent millennia
searching for a worthy championCopy !req
1305. and no one was worthy
of what I once sharedCopy !req
1306. with my brothers and sisters.Copy !req
1307. But when you shared your powers,Copy !req
1308. you did not hesitate.Copy !req
1309. For you, everyone can be worthy
if given a chance.Copy !req
1310. Now, go fight for your family.Copy !req
1311. Go fight for the world.Copy !req
1312. I chose right when I chose you.Copy !req
1313. Billy?Copy !req
1314. Billy, what are we gonna do, man?Copy !req
1315. Same thing we always do, Freddy.
Save the goddarn world.Copy !req
1316. Now, I'm gonna go get that staffCopy !req
1317. and I need you to lure these things awayCopy !req
1318. from the stadium
while I deal with the dragon, all right?Copy !req
1319. Wait, wait, wait. Billy, Billy.Copy !req
1320. Can I just see you before you go?Copy !req
1321. Not this version.Copy !req
1322. "You" you.Copy !req
1323. My Billy.Copy !req
1324. Shazam!Copy !req
1325. Is that why the house keeps
getting struck by lightning?Copy !req
1326. Hey.Copy !req
1327. I promise after this,Copy !req
1328. if I don't get eaten by a dragon,Copy !req
1329. I'm not gonna force you to keep me.Copy !req
1330. - Okay?
- What?Copy !req
1331. I know I age out soon.Copy !req
1332. Billy.Copy !req
1333. My wonderful, kind, brave son.Copy !req
1334. You will never age out of your home.Copy !req
1335. Never.Copy !req
1336. Now, do me a favor,Copy !req
1337. and I mean this
from the bottom of my heart,Copy !req
1338. go kick their ass, okay?Copy !req
1339. I love you, Mom.Copy !req
1340. Me, too.Copy !req
1341. Shazam!Copy !req
1342. That's gonna take some getting used to.Copy !req
1343. Everybody to the battle wagon!Copy !req
1344. The battle wagon?Copy !req
1345. Trying to get into the spirit of things.Copy !req
1346. Don't you see
what you're doing to these people?Copy !req
1347. I do.Copy !req
1348. And what I see is just.Copy !req
1349. Hespera, look at this tree.Copy !req
1350. It is blighted. It is unnatural here.Copy !req
1351. We made a vow to restore our realm,
not destroy another.Copy !req
1352. A god has answered their prayers at last.Copy !req
1353. They did not know their place,
so I am showing it to them.Copy !req
1354. Your fanatical tone
echoes our Uncle Hades.Copy !req
1355. No. I'm putting an end to this.Copy !req
1356. Hespera.Copy !req
1357. Hespera.Copy !req
1358. If your emotions rest
with the humans so, Anne,Copy !req
1359. then perhaps you should be human.Copy !req
1360. Help, somebody!Copy !req
1361. Somebody help!Copy !req
1362. Somebody help!Copy !req
1363. Okay, now what?
There are only so many minotaursCopy !req
1364. I can run over with this van.Copy !req
1365. Hey, Steve.Copy !req
1366. What are monsters afraid of?Copy !req
1367. "The king of beasts."Copy !req
1368. Lions?Copy !req
1369. Unicorns.Copy !req
1370. Really? I love unicorns.Copy !req
1371. Yet the unicorn does not love you.Copy !req
1372. Guys, unicorns don't exist.Copy !req
1373. What?Copy !req
1374. Oh, my...Copy !req
1375. I guess maybe it's not so crazy.Copy !req
1376. The unicorn is the most fearsome creature
of its realm.Copy !req
1377. Ruthless and cruel,
not like the ponies from your storybooks.Copy !req
1378. They loathe humanity.Copy !req
1379. Is there anything they do like?Copy !req
1380. "Dark caverns."Ambrosia"?Copy !req
1381. Ambrosia.
It's like the nectar of the gods.Copy !req
1382. It's supposed to be sweet, like honey.Copy !req
1383. I have an idea.Copy !req
1384. Go, go! Quick, quick.Copy !req
1385. Guys, get as many of these people
to safety as you can.Copy !req
1386. Kids?Copy !req
1387. - Let's go.
- Come on, let's go!Copy !req
1388. Wizard?Copy !req
1389. I'm going with them.Copy !req
1390. Freddy?Copy !req
1391. Anne?Copy !req
1392. Anne! Anne!Copy !req
1393. I am not entirely sure how to parent here.Copy !req
1394. Hey! Khaleesi!Copy !req
1395. That was really satisfying.Copy !req
1396. How was that for you?Copy !req
1397. Yeah.Copy !req
1398. We love you, Thundercrack.Copy !req
1399. You're the best, Captain Marvel.Copy !req
1400. - Yeah, go, High Voltage!
- Oh, wassup, bro?Copy !req
1401. It's Maximum Voltage, actually,
amongst other names.Copy !req
1402. We're still kinda workshopping it, so...Copy !req
1403. You thought you were invulnerable. But no.Copy !req
1404. Magical fire.Copy !req
1405. Magic can kill magic.Copy !req
1406. Yeah, yeah, yeah, "Magic kills magic."
Way ahead of you, lady.Copy !req
1407. I'm just trippin' out because
I've never seen my suit burn like this.Copy !req
1408. Also, nobody messes with my town!Copy !req
1409. Know what I'm saying?Copy !req
1410. I defeated my traitor sister.Copy !req
1411. You think I won't destroy you?Copy !req
1412. The staff is absorbing it all.Copy !req
1413. Like a battery.Copy !req
1414. That's right.Copy !req
1415. Run!Copy !req
1416. This is a terrible idea.Copy !req
1417. You don't understand
the savagery, the barbarity.Copy !req
1418. Oh, no.Copy !req
1419. - Hello.
- No.Copy !req
1420. It's okay. Come here.Copy !req
1421. Darla.Copy !req
1422. It's okay. Good girl.Copy !req
1423. Watch out!Copy !req
1424. Darla!Copy !req
1425. Taste the rainbow.Copy !req
1426. Good, isn't it?Copy !req
1427. It's the closest to ambrosia we have.Copy !req
1428. Good girl.Copy !req
1429. We're gonna need more Skittles.Copy !req
1430. Taste the rainbow, mother...Copy !req
1431. No. No, no, no! No!Copy !req
1432. Lady, lady, you can't die!Copy !req
1433. Come on, Billy, come on!
Powers, powers, powers.Copy !req
1434. Medical powers. No.
How-to-fix-dead-people powers.Copy !req
1435. Clear?Copy !req
1436. Come on! One more time,
one more time. Clear!Copy !req
1437. Stop! Stop!Copy !req
1438. Let me go to the underworld
in peace, please.Copy !req
1439. Oh, lady, lady, listen to me,
listen to me, okay?Copy !req
1440. I don't want anyone else to die.Copy !req
1441. Not my family, not Anthea, not anyone,
and we can save them.Copy !req
1442. This all came from the tree, right?Copy !req
1443. I think I might know a way to destroyCopy !req
1444. the tree and the dragon all in one.Copy !req
1445. Ladon's powers are too great, boy.Copy !req
1446. Well, not if I can overload the staffCopy !req
1447. - with enough lightning.
- A bomb?Copy !req
1448. Is that enough to kill the dragon?Copy !req
1449. And more.Copy !req
1450. You would annihilate
everything that's inside the dome.Copy !req
1451. Well, then I have one more favor to ask.Copy !req
1452. Let's go, let's go. Let's go.
There's shelter ahead.Copy !req
1453. There's shelter ahead. Let's go.Copy !req
1454. Walk, don't run. There's shelter ahead.Copy !req
1455. Let's go, let's go.Copy !req
1456. Keep going. Keep going!Copy !req
1457. Anne!Copy !req
1458. Anne!Copy !req
1459. Anne!Copy !req
1460. Go. Run.Copy !req
1461. Watch that rear.Copy !req
1462. Go, go, go!Copy !req
1463. Back away!Copy !req
1464. Run, run, run!Copy !req
1465. Anne!Copy !req
1466. Ladon, kill the traitor.Copy !req
1467. Impossible.Copy !req
1468. Bow him!Copy !req
1469. I lost it. Freddy, I can't.Copy !req
1470. What is a god without her power?Copy !req
1471. The most powerful thing about you is you.Copy !req
1472. You taught me that.Copy !req
1473. Kill them!Copy !req
1474. Boom!Copy !req
1475. That must be super disappointing
as a dragon.Copy !req
1476. Assuming that you are one.Copy !req
1477. I mean, you fly, and you breathe fire,Copy !req
1478. but you're also made of wood,
which is a weird flexCopy !req
1479. and a serious design flaw,
if I'm being honest.Copy !req
1480. Freddy, Anthea, don't!Copy !req
1481. Ah, made you look!Copy !req
1482. Oh, lady, that's twice.Copy !req
1483. And I didn't even need
a flaming violin that time.Copy !req
1484. You want the staff? Come get it.Copy !req
1485. Now, Hespera.Copy !req
1486. Now, Hespera.Copy !req
1487. Now, now.Copy !req
1488. No. No! No!Copy !req
1489. Remove the dome.Copy !req
1490. As long as I still breathe,Copy !req
1491. the dome still stands.Copy !req
1492. Till I see you on the other side, sister.Copy !req
1493. Billy!Copy !req
1494. - Get out of there.
- I can't.Copy !req
1495. Billy.Copy !req
1496. I have to do this.Copy !req
1497. Billy, what are you doing?
You're not supposed to be in there.Copy !req
1498. Yeah, I am.Copy !req
1499. I used to think that
I couldn't do anything right,Copy !req
1500. that I didn't deserve my powers,Copy !req
1501. but there's something that I can do.Copy !req
1502. No.Copy !req
1503. I can save all of you.Copy !req
1504. But it's all or none!Copy !req
1505. Yeah.Copy !req
1506. All of my family gets to live
and none of them gets hurt.Copy !req
1507. Freddy, I've never had a family.
You know that.Copy !req
1508. Everybody I've ever cared about,
they all left me.Copy !req
1509. My mom, my dad, everyone.Copy !req
1510. So when I found you guys, I had to hang onCopy !req
1511. and I've been hanging on too tight.Copy !req
1512. I should have let you do your own thing.Copy !req
1513. Now it's time for you to fly.Copy !req
1514. What about you?Copy !req
1515. I'm Captain Everypower Junior.Copy !req
1516. Don't you forget it.Copy !req
1517. We end this now.Copy !req
1518. Yeah. We do.Copy !req
1519. Come on, Billy.Copy !req
1520. He's got this. We got this.
He's got this. He's got this.Copy !req
1521. Billy.Copy !req
1522. Fly.Copy !req
1523. Billy.Copy !req
1524. Come on, baby. Come on, let's go!Copy !req
1525. No!Copy !req
1526. Shazam!Copy !req
1527. Billy.Copy !req
1528. A true god, after all.Copy !req
1529. He did it.Copy !req
1530. We must go.Copy !req
1531. Billy?Copy !req
1532. Billy?Copy !req
1533. Billy!Copy !req
1534. Billy!Copy !req
1535. Billy, where are you?Copy !req
1536. Billy!Copy !req
1537. Billy?Copy !req
1538. Billy! Billy.Copy !req
1539. Billy! Billy!Copy !req
1540. Billy! Dude, wake up. You did it.Copy !req
1541. Okay. You're supposed to wake up.Copy !req
1542. It's the part where
you're supposed to wake up,Copy !req
1543. you're supposed
to open your eyes and laugh,Copy !req
1544. and you're supposed to say you got me,
'cause you got me.Copy !req
1545. Dude. Joke's over, man.Copy !req
1546. Billy!Copy !req
1547. Billy. Billy, come on.Copy !req
1548. Freddy.Copy !req
1549. What did you do?Copy !req
1550. Wake up, Billy.Copy !req
1551. - Billy?
- He's over here!Copy !req
1552. Billy.Copy !req
1553. You asshole!Copy !req
1554. We're a team! We're a team!Copy !req
1555. Oh, Billy.Copy !req
1556. Billy.Copy !req
1557. Oh, my baby. No.Copy !req
1558. He was a hero.Copy !req
1559. He was a hero and a god.Copy !req
1560. And he should be laid to rest like one.Copy !req
1561. Hey, pal.Copy !req
1562. Will this land ever come back?Copy !req
1563. The staff is drained of magic.Copy !req
1564. Only the spark of a god
can restore its powerCopy !req
1565. and there are no gods left.Copy !req
1566. There is one.Copy !req
1567. What?Copy !req
1568. It's a zombie!Copy !req
1569. Guys!Copy !req
1570. What the hell?Copy !req
1571. You buried me?Copy !req
1572. In what, like, two minutes?Copy !req
1573. Oh, Billy!Copy !req
1574. Hey.Copy !req
1575. Oh, man. I missed you guys.Copy !req
1576. Hi. Hey.Copy !req
1577. Oh, my God. Hi.Copy !req
1578. Why didn't anybody tell me...Copy !req
1579. Hi. Sorry, sorry.Copy !req
1580. I didn't see you there,Copy !req
1581. I was dead at the time.Copy !req
1582. So, you got my bird letter?Copy !req
1583. Oh, I...Copy !req
1584. I think you've got something.Copy !req
1585. On my...Copy !req
1586. Where? Oh.Copy !req
1587. What?Copy !req
1588. That's a spider.Copy !req
1589. I'm sorry, that's disgusting.Copy !req
1590. Also, that's really embarrassing.Copy !req
1591. Yes, it is.Copy !req
1592. But it was an amazing thing you did.Copy !req
1593. The sacrifice you made.Copy !req
1594. You brought this world back to life.Copy !req
1595. Maybe this time, gods and humans
can learn to live in peace.Copy !req
1596. Yeah.Copy !req
1597. Use the power of Zeus wisely.Copy !req
1598. Be well, Billy Batson.Copy !req
1599. Hey, you know, just because
your father's power is surging through me,Copy !req
1600. that doesn't technically
make us related, you know,Copy !req
1601. and I'm gonna be 18
in, like, five months, so...Copy !req
1602. Stick to saving the world, kid.Copy !req
1603. Yeah, you know, like, that's...
Okay, cool.Copy !req
1604. See ya.Copy !req
1605. What's with our boys and older women?Copy !req
1606. Hey.Copy !req
1607. Who wants their powers back?Copy !req
1608. We can do that, right?Copy !req
1609. - Yeah.
- Yeah. Okay, good. Good, good, good.Copy !req
1610. I'd like our house back.Copy !req
1611. Can we do that?Copy !req
1612. - Dinner!
- Coming.Copy !req
1613. Aw. Thank you for respecting
the cross-stitch.Copy !req
1614. Anthea.Copy !req
1615. Have you decided what you're gonna doCopy !req
1616. about that god realm of yours?Copy !req
1617. Well, actually, I'm gonna take
some time off while it heals.Copy !req
1618. Spend some time with the common folk.Copy !req
1619. Learn some about your world,Copy !req
1620. about how, maybe,
we can learn from each other.Copy !req
1621. Number one sign of wisdom:Copy !req
1622. Admitting there's always more to learn.Copy !req
1623. I'm coming around to it.Copy !req
1624. I got it.Copy !req
1625. Guys?Copy !req
1626. Guys!Copy !req
1627. It's the wizard.Copy !req
1628. - Oh, my God!
- No way!Copy !req
1629. - Yes.
- Look at this guy!Copy !req
1630. Look at him, he's so handsome.Copy !req
1631. You pimpin' now, what is this?Copy !req
1632. - You look amazing.
- You look great!Copy !req
1633. Well, I was in the neighborhoodCopy !req
1634. and I just wanted to express my gratitudeCopy !req
1635. before I go.Copy !req
1636. Sorry. Doorbell's broken.
Actually, everything's broken.Copy !req
1637. Not everything.Copy !req
1638. You were just in the neighborhood?Copy !req
1639. Okay, I came for the staff.Copy !req
1640. Perhaps I will hold onto it for now.Copy !req
1641. I also wanted to see your faces
one last timeCopy !req
1642. before I turn into a pile of ash.Copy !req
1643. - Wait, what?
- No!Copy !req
1644. I am making a joke.
I have an Uber waiting.Copy !req
1645. And besides,Copy !req
1646. I've been trapped in rocks and prisons
for far too long.Copy !req
1647. It's time to see your world.Copy !req
1648. It's been an honor,Copy !req
1649. a privilege, watching you all soar.Copy !req
1650. You know, you're not such a bad wizard.Copy !req
1651. Thank you, Jeff.Copy !req
1652. It never ends.Copy !req
1653. Also,Copy !req
1654. what's my superhero name?Copy !req
1655. Your name isCopy !req
1656. Shazam.Copy !req
1657. - Of course.
- Yeah.Copy !req
1658. I still think we can beat it.Copy !req
1659. My feet hurt. How much further?Copy !req
1660. About ten seconds less
than the last time you asked me.Copy !req
1661. I'm sorry, I just feel like we could
have parked a little bit closer.Copy !req
1662. He doesn't know we're coming,
and I didn't want to spook him.Copy !req
1663. "Spook him." He's a superhero, not a deer.Copy !req
1664. All right, let's go.Copy !req
1665. And then you can tell Waller
that even thoughCopy !req
1666. she thinks this guy could be
a good addition to the team,Copy !req
1667. we never actually met him
because you wore shitty walking shoes.Copy !req
1668. Okay, first of all, they're boots,
and they're not shitty, they're new.Copy !req
1669. I just haven't had a chance
to break them in yet.Copy !req
1670. Shut up.Copy !req
1671. Waller said this guy is
as powerful as they come,Copy !req
1672. but a little immature.Copy !req
1673. Oh, great.Copy !req
1674. - Billy Batson.
- Yeah?Copy !req
1675. I mean, no.Copy !req
1676. I've never heard that name in my life.
I don't know who you're talking about.Copy !req
1677. But I'd like to meet that personCopy !req
1678. 'cause they sound super cool. And funny.Copy !req
1679. And talented. And ridiculously handsome,
but like in a dangerous way.Copy !req
1680. What the hell are you talking about?Copy !req
1681. Relax. We know who you are.Copy !req
1682. - How?
- Don't worry about that.Copy !req
1683. Who are you guys?Copy !req
1684. Don't worry about that either.Copy !req
1685. Look, we've seen what you can do.Copy !req
1686. And we're here to make you an offer.Copy !req
1687. - How would you like to join the Justice...
- Yes!Copy !req
1688. A thousand times yes!Copy !req
1689. Oh, my gosh!
I've been dreaming about this!Copy !req
1690. Well, I mean, not this exactly.Copy !req
1691. Like, normally, it's Wonder Woman
in the dream, but...Copy !req
1692. Ew.Copy !req
1693. Well, that was easy.Copy !req
1694. Welcome to the Justice Society.Copy !req
1695. Yeah! Awesome. Wait, what?Copy !req
1696. The Justice Society?Copy !req
1697. Is that different than the Justice League?Copy !req
1698. Yes. The Justice Society
is different than the Justice LeagueCopy !req
1699. because of how words work.Copy !req
1700. I just want to be
in the Wonder Woman group.Copy !req
1701. - So that's you guys, right?
- No.Copy !req
1702. Why are you so obsessed
with Wonder Woman, dude?Copy !req
1703. He's joking, right?Copy !req
1704. - No?
- Okay. I'm out.Copy !req
1705. I'm gonna wait here, 'cause of the shoes.Copy !req
1706. Can you drive by and get me?Copy !req
1707. Hey, just a little constructive criticism.Copy !req
1708. It's pretty confusing that there are
two separate groups of superheroesCopy !req
1709. that are totally unaffiliated,Copy !req
1710. but both have "Justice"
in their name, you know.Copy !req
1711. Like, have you guys ever thought
about doing a rebranding of sorts?Copy !req
1712. 'Cause just a quick search
on Thesaurus.com,Copy !req
1713. you got so many options, man.Copy !req
1714. Like, "Authority Society."Copy !req
1715. "Code Society." That's stupid.Copy !req
1716. These are, like, legal terms.Copy !req
1717. "The Avenger society."Copy !req
1718. I like that for some reason.Copy !req
1719. Well, well, Doctor. We meet again.Copy !req
1720. Where in the hell have you been?Copy !req
1721. To implement the perfect plan, Doctor,Copy !req
1722. one must have patience.Copy !req
1723. What are you talking about?Copy !req
1724. It's been two goddamn years!Copy !req
1725. Yes. But what is time
but a trick of the mind?Copy !req
1726. A meaningless measure.Copy !req
1727. Hey. I'm 57 years old.Copy !req
1728. I'm stuck in a concrete box
surrounded by lunaticsCopy !req
1729. waiting for a worm to enact some, what,Copy !req
1730. vague plan I've been told
absolutely nothing about?Copy !req
1731. It takes me a very long time
to get places, okay?Copy !req
1732. I do not have legs, I do not have wings,Copy !req
1733. I just slither around endlessly.Copy !req
1734. But not for long.Copy !req
1735. Tell me everything.Copy !req
1736. Just one more thing I need to do.Copy !req
1737. What? No!Copy !req
1738. Oh, goddamn it!Copy !req