1. HeyCopy !req
2. Stand upCopy !req
3. HeyCopy !req
4. Ruthless PeopleCopy !req
5. Ruthless PeopleCopy !req
6. Greedy
forever and everCopy !req
7. SuccessCopy !req
8. Greedy
and ever so cleverCopy !req
9. A messCopy !req
10. Keepin' their right
to creep into paradiseCopy !req
11. They'll even
blackmail St. PeterCopy !req
12. They'll pay any priceCopy !req
13. HeyCopy !req
14. Stand upCopy !req
15. Come and seeCopy !req
16. Ruthless PeopleCopy !req
17. Greed and evil
oh yeahCopy !req
18. You can have it
if you want itCopy !req
19. It might take
the rest of your lifeCopy !req
20. If you want it
you can have itCopy !req
21. Do a balancing act
on a knifeCopy !req
22. You can have it
if you want itCopy !req
23. It fits and gets cheap
at the priceCopy !req
24. If you want it
you can have itCopy !req
25. Despite your sweet soul
and your liesCopy !req
26. Ruthless PeopleCopy !req
27. Ruthless PeopleCopy !req
28. Carol, did I ever tell you
why I married her?Copy !req
29. Yes, Sam, you told me
many, many—Copy !req
30. Her father was
very, very rich...Copy !req
31. and very, very sick.Copy !req
32. The doctors assured me
he'd be dead any minute.Copy !req
33. There wasn't
a second to lose.Copy !req
34. I rushed right out and
married the boss's daughter.Copy !req
35. He was so sick!Copy !req
36. It was like the angel of death
was sittin' in the room with him,Copy !req
37. watchin' the clock.Copy !req
38. They pulled the plug
on him.Copy !req
39. He wheezed and shook
for about an hour.Copy !req
40. And then...Copy !req
41. he stabilized.Copy !req
42. That son of a bitch
just got older and sicker.Copy !req
43. And older and sicker!Copy !req
44. And older and sicker!Copy !req
45. - More coffee, sir?
- No!Copy !req
46. I couldn't wait around any longer.
I went out and made my own fortune.Copy !req
47. The old fart hung in there
for 15 years!Copy !req
48. Finally died
of natural causes.Copy !req
49. I want the rest
of that money!Copy !req
50. His money, her money,
it's my money!Copy !req
51. I had to live with that squealing,
corpulent little toad all these years!Copy !req
52. God, I hate that woman!
I-I-I—Copy !req
53. I hate the way
she licks stamps.Copy !req
54. I hate her furniture.Copy !req
55. And I hate that little sound
she makes when she sleeps.Copy !req
56. [ Snorting, Baa-ing ]
Ohhh!Copy !req
57. And that filthy, little
shitbag dog of hers... Muffy!Copy !req
58. - Aren't you scared?
- Scared?Copy !req
59. Hell, no.
I'm lookin' forward to it.Copy !req
60. My only regret, Carol,Copy !req
61. is that the plan
isn't more violent.Copy !req
62. Don't you consider throwing
a body off a cliff in the
dead of night violent?Copy !req
63. Nah! She'll be unconscious,
knocked out from the chloroform.Copy !req
64. I'm talkin' about
hands-on involvement.Copy !req
65. Hands-on?Copy !req
66. Ohh. Ohh!Copy !req
67. Oh-ho!Copy !req
68. I'm goin' now. I can't wait.Copy !req
69. Good luck.Copy !req
70. Barbara, dear,
I have something for you.Copy !req
71. Barbara?Copy !req
72. Where are you, dearest?Copy !req
73. I have something for you.Copy !req
74. Honey?Copy !req
75. Barbara?Copy !req
76. Dumpling?Copy !req
77. Barbara?Copy !req
78. No notes,
no messages.Copy !req
79. This is not like you,
you meticulous bitch!Copy !req
80. It's just like that woman
to screw this up.Copy !req
81. Damn it!Copy !req
82. What are you doin' here?
Mining the carpet
with little poodle bombs?Copy !req
83. Here! Take a whiff of this,
you little fruitcake.Copy !req
84. I'll kill you!Copy !req
85. - I'll wring your neck!Copy !req
86. You hairy rat!Copy !req
87. - Hello.
- Mr. Stone?Copy !req
88. Listen very carefully.
We have kidnapped your wife.Copy !req
89. We have no qualms about
killing and will do so
at the slightest provocation.Copy !req
90. - Do you understand?
- Who the hell is this?
Is this some joke?Copy !req
91. I have no patience for
stupid questions, Mr. Stone, and
I don't like repeating myself.Copy !req
92. Do you understand?Copy !req
93. All right, I'm sorry.
Please continue.Copy !req
94. You are to obtain a new, black
American Tourister briefcase,Copy !req
95. - model number 8104.
Do you understand?
- Yes.Copy !req
96. In it you will place
$500,000 in unmarked,Copy !req
97. nonsequentially
numbered $100 bills.Copy !req
98. - Do you understand?
- Sure.Copy !req
99. Monday morning at
11:00 a.m., you will proceed
with case in hand,Copy !req
100. to Hope Street Plaza and
wait for a phone to ring.Copy !req
101. You will receive
further instructions then.Copy !req
102. - Do you understand?
- Yes, I do.Copy !req
103. You'll be watched at
all phases of execution.Copy !req
104. If anyone is with you or if
any action is not carried out
to our complete satisfaction,Copy !req
105. it will be considered
an infraction of the rules,
and your wife will be killed.Copy !req
106. - Do you understand?
- I believe so.Copy !req
107. If you notify the police,
your wife will be killed.Copy !req
108. If you notify the media,
she will be killed.Copy !req
109. If you deviate from our
instructions in any way
whatsoever, she will be killed.Copy !req
110. - Do you understand?
- Perfectly.Copy !req
111. Just 45 minutes ago,
Mr. Stone received a call...Copy !req
112. from a man demanding
a ransom for his wife, Barbara.Copy !req
113. - Kenny!Copy !req
114. Grab her legs.Copy !req
115. Aah!Copy !req
116. Do you think
she's dead?Copy !req
117. Aah!Copy !req
118. You fucked
with the wrong person!Copy !req
119. My husband does business
with the Mafia.Copy !req
120. When they track you down,
you, your entire family,
everyone you ever knew...Copy !req
121. will all get chain saw enemas
and that's not all!Copy !req
122. Oh, my God!
I've been abducted by Huey and Duey.Copy !req
123. An—Copy !req
124. Jesus Christ!
It smells like a toilet in here!Copy !req
125. - It's just the ammonia.
- We scrubbed down here for hours
on our hands and knees,Copy !req
126. For God's sake.Copy !req
127. My husband worships
the ground I walk on!
Wait till he hears about this!Copy !req
128. He will explo-o-ode!Copy !req
129. Bye-bye, Barbara.Copy !req
130. In local news, a kidnapping
today in Bel Air.Copy !req
131. Police tell us this woman,
Barbara Stone,Copy !req
132. the wife of clothing tycoon,
Sam Stone,Copy !req
133. was abducted earlier today
from the couple's estate
on Bellagio Drive.Copy !req
134. Preliminary sources indicated
that Mr. Stone was contacted
late this afternoon...Copy !req
135. and that a ransom demand
has been made. Police officials—Copy !req
136. [ Newscaster #2 ]
kill Mrs. Stone
if demands were not met.Copy !req
137. It's on every
goddamn channel!Copy !req
138. Millionaire heiress, Barbara Stone,
has been kidnapped...Copy !req
139. from her
Bel Air mansion.Copy !req
140. What'd he do,
hire a publicist?Copy !req
141. I feel terrible.
Do you feel as guilty as I do?Copy !req
142. Guilty?
Are you kidding?Copy !req
143. He takes our money,
steals your idea,Copy !req
144. goes out and makes
a million dollars,
and you feel guilty?Copy !req
145. I can't
believe it!Copy !req
146. - How many times
have we been over this?
- Oh, honey, not again.Copy !req
147. Let me remind you
of something.Copy !req
148. You are the spandex
miniskirt king.Copy !req
149. Not him.
He is the spandex miniskirt thief.Copy !req
150. He's the one
who should feel guilty.Copy !req
151. Look at this.
Do you remember this?Copy !req
152. You cried for a week
when you saw this. Look at
the smile on that asshole.Copy !req
153. I know he stole it, but she
really didn't do anything.Copy !req
154. She was his partner!
Oh, damn it, Sandy.Copy !req
155. Do you enjoy
getting stepped on? Do you?Copy !req
156. 'Cause I don't,
and I don't feel guilty.Copy !req
157. I take it back.
I do feel guilty.Copy !req
158. I feel very guilty.
I trusted a sleazeball
like Sam Stone...Copy !req
159. with our life savings
on a handshake deal,Copy !req
160. and then sat there
and watched him take it
all away from us.Copy !req
161. But that's over.
We know better now.Copy !req
162. From now on,
we trust no one.Copy !req
163. To hell with everybody else.
We've got to be ruthless.Copy !req
164. - Think ruthless.
- What if I can't think ruthless?Copy !req
165. You've got to. It's good for you.
It makes you strong.Copy !req
166. What the hell's the sense
of being a decent person
when nobody else is?Copy !req
167. Let's be assholes
and get rich!Copy !req
168. - [ Squealing, Moaning ]Copy !req
169. Oh, oh! I'm crazy about you,
you big galoot!Copy !req
170. Ooh, you were
somethin' today!Copy !req
171. - Yeah, it just doesn't get
any better than this.
- Mmm.Copy !req
172. I'm gonna take
a quick shower.Copy !req
173. - Can you be ready
by the time I get out?
- Ready?Copy !req
174. You're getting ready
for Sam.Copy !req
175. The video equipment,
remember?Copy !req
176. - Tonight's the night.
- Oh yeah, I knew that.Copy !req
177. - Now, do you remember
where I told you to go?
- Yeah.Copy !req
178. - The old deserted bridge
near the Hollywood sign.
- That's right.Copy !req
179. You wait for him there.
He'll be in some rented car.Copy !req
180. He's afraid of getting blood
on his sports car.Copy !req
181. Get in as close
as you can.Copy !req
182. It's important you get
a good shot of his face.Copy !req
183. If we can't recognize him,
we can't blackmail him.Copy !req
184. You get that videotape of Sam
finishing off his wife,Copy !req
185. and that man will give us
anything we want...Copy !req
186. for the rest of his life.Copy !req
187. Yeah, then we're off
to Haiti.Copy !req
188. Not Haiti, Tahiti!Copy !req
189. I knew that.Copy !req
190. The passports
came today.Copy !req
191. Cool.Copy !req
192. - Frank, glad you're here.
- What have we got?Copy !req
193. We found a chloroform-soaked
handkerchief stuffed
way down in the garbage,Copy !req
194. and a tire print on the lawn,
a good one. I'm having the lab
check it out.Copy !req
195. And we found a few drops
of blood in the kitchen.Copy !req
196. - Where's Mr. Stone?
- He's upstairs.Copy !req
197. He seems
pretty upset.Copy !req
198. - Yes?Copy !req
199. Mr. Stone, Lieutenant Bender
and Walters are here.Copy !req
200. They'd like to start
as soon as possible.Copy !req
201. I'll be right there.Copy !req
202. Ow!
Oh, oh!Copy !req
203. Hee-hee-hee.Copy !req
204. - I like to hear a woman
make a lot of sound.
- Uh-huh.Copy !req
205. I'll scream my head off
if you want to, honey.
It's your money.Copy !req
206. My wife just lays there
like a gunnysack.Copy !req
207. Oh, my God.
She isn't dead yet.Copy !req
208. - He's gonna kill her right here!Copy !req
209. Oh, oh.Copy !req
210. I have no enemies,
at least none that I know of.Copy !req
211. I— I'm a businessman.Copy !req
212. I manufacture
women's sportswear.Copy !req
213. I think I've heard of you.Copy !req
214. Don't they call you
the "spandex king"?Copy !req
215. The "spandex miniskirt king."
You probably read
one of the articles.Copy !req
216. Yeah, it was all his idea...
spandex miniskirts.Copy !req
217. Was there anybody here
today when you came home?
Servants?Copy !req
218. - Maids?
- It was the maid's day off.Copy !req
219. Did you notice anything
out of the ordinary
when you came home?Copy !req
220. No, not that
I can remember.Copy !req
221. - What time did you come home?
- It's the dog!Copy !req
222. She isn't
properly house-trained.Copy !req
223. No, it's sweet.Copy !req
224. The dog's
a little diabetic.Copy !req
225. I think it's wine...Copy !req
226. - Or—
- Oh, I know what that must be.Copy !req
227. I— I closed a very
important business deal...Copy !req
228. this morning and
when I came home...Copy !req
229. I opened a bottle of champagne
and—and as I was...Copy !req
230. walking through the house,
celebrating,Copy !req
231. I called to Barbara to come
and share the moment with me.Copy !req
232. She never came.Copy !req
233. Those monsters!Copy !req
234. Earl!Copy !req
235. It was horrible.Copy !req
236. - She wasn't drugged or anything.
- What happened?Copy !req
237. She screamed
and screamed.Copy !req
238. God, it took forever.
It must have lasted... two minutes.Copy !req
239. He kept stopping and starting.
She'd be at the brink of death
and he'd stop,Copy !req
240. let her catch her breath
then start into her again!Copy !req
241. She'd scream
louder and louder and then,Copy !req
242. when she finally died,Copy !req
243. he looked so satisfied
I thought he was gonna
light up a cigarette afterwards.Copy !req
244. Son of a bitch
enjoyed it!Copy !req
245. Sam's just been on TV
claiming she was kidnapped.Copy !req
246. She wasn't kidnapped.
He killed her. I saw it.Copy !req
247. Honey, I know.
It's just an alibi.Copy !req
248. He just said that
to throw the police off his trail.Copy !req
249. You gonna watch that
right now?Copy !req
250. - I think I should.
- Baby, you don't wanna see it.Copy !req
251. - It'll make you sick.
- I think I can take it.Copy !req
252. Oh, no!Copy !req
253. - Ooh! I can't watch this.Copy !req
254. He actually
went through with it.Copy !req
255. - Stay in here. Don't come out.
- What?Copy !req
256. Sam's here!Copy !req
257. Ta-da!Copy !req
258. Zip-a-dee-doo-dah
Zip-a-dee-ayCopy !req
259. My, oh, my
what a wonderful dayCopy !req
260. I've just been
watching you on TV.Copy !req
261. - You saw it, huh?
- Good performance, Sam.Copy !req
262. What a story!
Barbara Stone kidnapped!Copy !req
263. I couldn't have made up
anything better. It's brilliant!Copy !req
264. And the press
loves it.Copy !req
265. - Well, that's very clever, Sam.
- It's inspired!Copy !req
266. Imagine, someone
demanding money from me
to keep Barbara alive.Copy !req
267. Unbelievable!
Idiots!Copy !req
268. Come on,
let's have a drink.Copy !req
269. I can't stay long.Copy !req
270. I've gotta get back
and look sad.Copy !req
271. - Are you sure
the police believed you?
- They ate it up!Copy !req
272. I fed 'em a banquet
of bullshit.Copy !req
273. I threw 'em off by miles.
All I have to do now...Copy !req
274. is just sit back
and do nothing,Copy !req
275. except, of course,
I have to show up at the
fictitious ransom drop.Copy !req
276. - You made up
your own ransom drop?
- Naturally!Copy !req
277. I got news for you,
Carol.Copy !req
278. That woman
ain't comin' back.Copy !req
279. - I know.Copy !req
280. Did you have
any trouble?Copy !req
281. No, I'm tellin' you
I enjoyed it.Copy !req
282. - I'm havin' fun!Copy !req
283. We'll clean the rug,
honey.Copy !req
284. For you, my cupcake.Copy !req
285. To the kidnappers.Copy !req
286. To the future
Mrs. Sam Stone.Copy !req
287. Whoops!
I gotta run. I'm sorry, honey.Copy !req
288. I was hopin' we'd have time
for little... poke in the whiskers.Copy !req
289. - What a shame.
- I'll take a rain check,Copy !req
290. and a few
of these bonbons.Copy !req
291. Zip-a-dee-doo-dahCopy !req
292. Zip-a-dee-ayCopy !req
293. [ Announcer #1 ]
Rock always whines abuse
at the opponent too.Copy !req
294. [ Announcer #2 ]
Yes, and I think Murdo's
gonna get a taste of it tonight.Copy !req
295. Ooh my, look at
all that hair,Copy !req
296. or, uh, fur,
if you would.Copy !req
297. [ Announcer #1 ]
He doesn't need a coat in wintertime.Copy !req
298. He'll just walk around
like that and have plenty of heat.Copy !req
299. You okay?Copy !req
300. - She's out!
- Help, police!Copy !req
301. - Get the chloroform!
- Come back, honey.Copy !req
302. Police!
Somebody help me!Copy !req
303. - Get me the police.
I've been kidnapped.Copy !req
304. How the hell do I know
where I am?Copy !req
305. Good.Copy !req
306. Now, be quiet
and don't move.Copy !req
307. Nice faces...
Nice easily-identifiable faces.Copy !req
308. - Boo!
- I can't do this anymore!Copy !req
309. Ow!
God, that hurts!Copy !req
310. - Aaah!
- Aaah!Copy !req
311. Whee-aaah!Copy !req
312. Oh! Ahh!Copy !req
313. Aaah!Copy !req
314. This is Sergeant Blake
at the lab.Copy !req
315. I'd like a purchase search
on Uniroyal model NXP.Copy !req
316. That's right,
for all of LA County.Copy !req
317. This is Action News Break.Copy !req
318. Police are now at the scene of
a brutal murder in Inglewood...Copy !req
319. they believe may be the result
of another attack by
the "bedroom killer."Copy !req
320. Investigators are asking anyone
who may have seen this man
to contact them at 555-3421.Copy !req
321. Police have also issued
a warning that this man
is extremely dangerous,Copy !req
322. and citizens should not attempt
to apprehend him.Copy !req
323. This is Action News Break.
I'm Rick DeReyes.Copy !req
324. Away it goes!
Trying to beat—Copy !req
325. Money, better times, girls.Copy !req
326. Six. Keep going.
Steady, nice and tall.Copy !req
327. Come on, and knees up,
feet straight. Get those heels down.Copy !req
328. And pull those abdominals in.
Pull 'em in, suck 'em up.Copy !req
329. If you're still on that couch
eating that doughnut,Copy !req
330. put it down
and get up!Copy !req
331. Three, four,
standing nice and tall.Copy !req
332. Heels down and front.
Come on, reach.Copy !req
333. Shh, shh, shh.Copy !req
334. Come on, get those
pepperoni thighs nice and high.Copy !req
335. And reach!
Do it a little higher.
Squeeze those buns.Copy !req
336. Remember, if you don't,
no one else will.Copy !req
337. - And don't forget to breathe.
- [ Gasping, Panting ]Copy !req
338. What if he
doesn't show?Copy !req
339. Oh, well then
you get to keep her.Copy !req
340. Everything's
gonna work.Copy !req
341. I'll call you.Copy !req
342. Sandy,
he's gonna show!Copy !req
343. It's his wife.Copy !req
344. Where are you, Sam?Copy !req
345. You son of a bitch!Copy !req
346. I'm gonna turn
your transmitter on.Copy !req
347. - He can't see the microphone?
- No, it looks fine.Copy !req
348. Mr. Stone,
telephone.Copy !req
349. - Hello?
- Mr. Stone, we had a meeting.Copy !req
350. Hang on, will ya, Harry?
I have some friends here.Copy !req
351. Call me on my office line,
555-7583. Right?Copy !req
352. Business associate.Copy !req
353. 555-7583.
555-7583.Copy !req
354. Hello?Copy !req
355. Mr. Stone, why have you
failed to appear at the
designated destination?Copy !req
356. Ahem. I just
couldn't make it.Copy !req
357. The cops are there,
aren't they?Copy !req
358. That's right, the cops
are here, reporters too.Copy !req
359. All right, Mr. Stone.
I'm a reasonable man.Copy !req
360. I'm gonna give you
one more chance.Copy !req
361. We will reschedule
our rendezvous for Wednesday.Copy !req
362. - Do you understand?
- You're rescheduling?Copy !req
363. Yes, I am.Copy !req
364. - So, she's still alive?
- She's in perfect health.Copy !req
365. Uh, in our
previous discussion,Copy !req
366. you mentioned that
you would, uh...Copy !req
367. kill my wife if procedure
wasn't followed accurately.Copy !req
368. - That's correct.
- And that still goes?Copy !req
369. - Definitely!
- Uh, what method would you use?Copy !req
370. How would
you kill her?Copy !req
371. A bullet through the head
at close range.Copy !req
372. That would do it,
no question.Copy !req
373. Um, well,
you've got me convinced.Copy !req
374. - Until Wednesday.
- Until Wednesday, then.Copy !req
375. Muffy,Copy !req
376. you've taken your
last piss on my rug.Copy !req
377. Tell Mr. Stone it's time
to leave for the ransom drop.Copy !req
378. - I hope he's not—Copy !req
379. - Oh, my God!Copy !req
380. It just—
It just went off.Copy !req
381. Coast to coast
via satelliteCopy !req
382. The greatest show
in townCopy !req
383. Tonight we crown
the champion, yeahCopy !req
384. So spread
the word aroundCopy !req
385. Who's the best
passed the testCopy !req
386. Who's got that look
in their eyesCopy !req
387. Better give him
a call.Copy !req
388. - Hello?
- This is Bender.Copy !req
389. It's been over an hour
and he hasn't shown up.Copy !req
390. If they haven't come by now,
I don't think they're gonna show.Copy !req
391. Why don't you go on home?
We'll send an unmarked car
to follow you.Copy !req
392. All right.
All right.Copy !req
393. Give me all your money, Jack!
Come on, before I kill you.Copy !req
394. Come on!
Come on!Copy !req
395. - Here you go.
- Give me your wallet.Copy !req
396. Come on, before I stick this
right through your back.Copy !req
397. - All right, here you go. My wallet.
- Give me all your jewelry,Copy !req
398. - your watch, rings, everything.
- Jewelry, watch.Copy !req
399. You want my underwear too,
you piece of shit? Here.Copy !req
400. You know, this town has got
some Neighborhood Watch!Copy !req
401. I brought you
some more magazines.Copy !req
402. More magazines?
How long do you plan on
keeping me down here?Copy !req
403. Well, as soon as
Mr. Stone pays the ransom.Copy !req
404. - It should be Monday.
- Good. I'd hate to miss
my doctor's appointment.Copy !req
405. Doctor's appointment?
Why, do you need medication?Copy !req
406. I get a
urine injection.Copy !req
407. You get
urine injected?Copy !req
408. - Why?
- It promotes weight loss.Copy !req
409. - Does it work?
- Yeah, it works!Copy !req
410. "Lancome throat and
firming massage cream.
Sperm whale oil.Copy !req
411. Royal queen bee jelly."
I can't get you these things.
We can't afford it.Copy !req
412. That's not my problem,
it's yours.Copy !req
413. Supply these things
and I will tell the jury
you acted humanely.Copy !req
414. It might make the difference
between life...Copy !req
415. and the chair!Copy !req
416. Or the gas chamber.
Ssss.Copy !req
417. Sometimes,
if it's a firing squad,Copy !req
418. they miss all
the major arteries.Copy !req
419. Bang!
And you don't die right away.Copy !req
420. You kinda just...
hang on, bleeding.Copy !req
421. Bleeding.Copy !req
422. Bleeding...Copy !req
423. - Endlessly.
- [ Screaming, Crashing ]Copy !req
424. Now, I want you to mail this
from across town.Copy !req
425. I don't want him seeing
a postmark from my neighborhood.Copy !req
426. Right. You're
good at this.Copy !req
427. - We can't be too careful with Sam.
He's a very suspicious man.
- Yeah.Copy !req
428. - I've got to see him one more time.
- You do?Copy !req
429. If I don't see him
on his birthday, he'll be
very, very suspicious.Copy !req
430. He'll be expecting
his usual present.Copy !req
431. It's been horrible.Copy !req
432. No matter what I do
or as nice as I can be,Copy !req
433. she just
tears into me.Copy !req
434. - She hates me.
- Sandy, you're her kidnapper.Copy !req
435. She's supposed
to hate you.Copy !req
436. I'll take it.Copy !req
437. - Okay.
- Just ignore her.Copy !req
438. Heyaah!Copy !req
439. - No dinner for you, then.
- Ah, gee whiz!Copy !req
440. That really hurts.
I'm a real aficionado
of death-camp cuisine.Copy !req
441. Look,Copy !req
442. as long as you're here,
why don't you just pretend...Copy !req
443. to be a guest.Copy !req
444. Nice butt.Copy !req
445. - That's what they'll say.
- I beg your pardon?Copy !req
446. Nice butt. That's what
they'll say on your first day...Copy !req
447. in the men's club.Copy !req
448. - Men's club?
- Mmm.Copy !req
449. The San Quentin
country club.Copy !req
450. With a cute little rear end
like that, you'll be
the belle of the ball.Copy !req
451. Your dance card'll
be filled every day.Copy !req
452. You'll be so popular,Copy !req
453. making all kinds of
new, close friends.Copy !req
454. Big, ugly
hairy friends!Copy !req
455. Not that you'll ever see
what they look like,Copy !req
456. 'cause you'll be facing
the other way.Copy !req
457. You're very good
at this.Copy !req
458. You should write
children's books.Copy !req
459. - Get outta here, you crotch wet.Copy !req
460. Go on, get!
Goddamn you, dog!Copy !req
461. Yes, your attack dogs,Copy !req
462. do they just attack people, or can
you get them to attack little dogs?Copy !req
463. Oh. Well, what if
you starve them for awhile?Copy !req
464. Oh. All right,
thank you.Copy !req
465. - Yeah?Copy !req
466. Miss Farnsworth to see you.
- Send her in.Copy !req
467. Happy birthday, Sam.Copy !req
468. I brought you
your present.Copy !req
469. Oh yeah?
Where is it?Copy !req
470. Here it is, Sam.
Does it meet with your satisfaction?Copy !req
471. - Mmm.
- Is there anything else you desire?Copy !req
472. How 'bout
a big dog?Copy !req
473. - Can you get one?
- A big dog?Copy !req
474. Yeah, like a Great Dane or a mastiff.
How big does a shepherd get?Copy !req
475. Sam, as sexually provocative
as I like to think I am—Copy !req
476. I'm not askin' you
to screw the dog, Carol.Copy !req
477. It's for me.Copy !req
478. See, that's what I've got,
the Dominator X-1.Copy !req
479. - It's the best speaker they carry.
- It's really pretty.Copy !req
480. - Can I help you?
- Yeah, uh—Copy !req
481. - Hi.
- Hi.Copy !req
482. Candy's here to get a stereo,
and I'm here to see she
doesn't get ripped off.Copy !req
483. Don't worry,
I'm not like the others.Copy !req
484. How much did you
want to spend?Copy !req
485. - $800.
- $500.Copy !req
486. Okay, I think I have an idea
what to show you.Copy !req
487. - Let's start with speakers.
- Okay.Copy !req
488. Over here, we have a great speaker,
Sentry EV-1.Copy !req
489. Consumer Stereo has
just rated this a best buy.Copy !req
490. - I have a pair myself.
- Yeah, uh, what do you
think of this one?Copy !req
491. The Dominator X-1?Copy !req
492. The Dominator's a good
marketing idea,Copy !req
493. but it's really not
a good speaker.Copy !req
494. We give it a 500% markup,
so we sell it at 50% off,Copy !req
495. give the customer the illusion
he's getting a deal,Copy !req
496. and we still make
a bundle.Copy !req
497. - But it's so big and impressive!
- Size means very little.Copy !req
498. Bigger is not
necessarily better.Copy !req
499. I sound like Dr. Ruth.Copy !req
500. - You mean the Dominator's
like a, uh—
- Well,Copy !req
501. the Dominators are very popular
with men who like to have bigger...Copy !req
502. uh—Copy !req
503. - Equipment?
- Exactly!Copy !req
504. All right,
let's try this one.Copy !req
505. Knees bent down,
hips tucked under.Copy !req
506. We're gonna work on the waist.
We're gonna loosen it up.
Take the arms left and right.Copy !req
507. Out, and reach as far
as you can.Copy !req
508. Keep going.
Okay, left.Copy !req
509. This time hold it over to the left.
Reach as far as you can.Copy !req
510. Reach the right arm
up to it and take it out.Copy !req
511. Very slowly twist
through the rib cage.Copy !req
512. Slowly lengthen,
lift that right leg up and hold it.Copy !req
513. Aaah!Copy !req
514. Keep holding it. Great!
Doesn't that feel good?Copy !req
515. Muffy?Copy !req
516. - Oh, Muffy?Copy !req
517. Muffy, meet Adolph.Copy !req
518. Adolph, eat Muffy!Copy !req
519. Bon appetit, Adolph.Copy !req
520. Junk, garbage,
garbage, junk.Copy !req
521. What do we got here?Copy !req
522. - Oh-ho-ho.Copy !req
523. "I thought you might find
this interesting.Copy !req
524. An Anonymous Friend."Copy !req
525. - More!Copy !req
526. - Hello.
- Carol, I got your tape.Copy !req
527. What are you talking about?Copy !req
528. The tape...
the videotape.Copy !req
529. What makes you think
it was me?Copy !req
530. Who else would send me
something like this?Copy !req
531. It's Sam.
He's onto us.Copy !req
532. How in the hell did you
get this, Carol?Copy !req
533. A friend of mine
took it.Copy !req
534. It's terrific. I know why
you sent me this tape, honey.Copy !req
535. And you know what
I'm gonna do?Copy !req
536. I'm gonna do the same
damn thing with you.Copy !req
537. And you, too, could
scream your brains out
because no one's gonna hear.Copy !req
538. You are gonna be
beggin' me for mercy,Copy !req
539. whimpering.Copy !req
540. Oh, here she goes again.
Listen to this.Copy !req
541. This is my
favorite part.Copy !req
542. He's gonna kill me.
He's gonna torture me and kill me.Copy !req
543. I can't stay here.
I'm gonna have to stay...Copy !req
544. at your place.Copy !req
545. Don't worry, honey.
Stay here as long as you want.Copy !req
546. Oh, shoot!Copy !req
547. Crockett and Tubbs,
they're floatin'.Copy !req
548. I can't
just sit here and wait for him...Copy !req
549. to track me down
and kill me.Copy !req
550. We've got to get Sam
put in jail.Copy !req
551. I want you to make
another copy of that tape,Copy !req
552. and this one's
for the police.Copy !req
553. So, I guess it's just a matter of time
before you're caught,Copy !req
554. right, honeybun?Copy !req
555. Barbara, I want to ask you
a personal question.Copy !req
556. You and
Mr. Stone,Copy !req
557. did you get along?Copy !req
558. So, what did
she say?Copy !req
559. She just
insulted me.Copy !req
560. I don't think
he loves her.Copy !req
561. Let's face it,
she's not Mother Teresa.
Gandhi would have strangled her.Copy !req
562. What are we
gonna do, Kenny?Copy !req
563. I'm tired of being scared
all the time every day.Copy !req
564. I can't take this
anymore.Copy !req
565. I know he's bluffing.Copy !req
566. I just know it.Copy !req
567. I've got to be
really tough with him.Copy !req
568. Never let the seller know
you're hot to trot.Copy !req
569. Tell him you
haven't got the money.Copy !req
570. Hello.
Debbie?Copy !req
571. Yeah, Debbie's here.
Who's this?Copy !req
572. Well, Ralph, Debbie
can't talk right now.
My dick's in her mouth.Copy !req
573. How 'bout if I have
her call you back when I'm done.Copy !req
574. I love wrong numbers.Copy !req
575. Anyway, tell 'em
you don't have the money,Copy !req
576. that it's all tied up
in investments or some crap.Copy !req
577. Hang on! A bad salesman
will automatically drop his price.Copy !req
578. Bad salesmen make me sick.
Hello.Copy !req
579. Mr. Stone,
do you love your wife?Copy !req
580. Hang on. Would you excuse me
for a moment, please?Copy !req
581. Oh, sure, Mr. Stone.Copy !req
582. - Go ahead.Copy !req
583. Mr. Stone, you love
your wife, don't you?Copy !req
584. Sure, I love my wife.Copy !req
585. Mr. Stone, we demand
a satisfactory explanation...Copy !req
586. why you haven't shown
with the money.Copy !req
587. Look, pal, you're asking a lot
of cash. I haven't got that
kind of money around the house.Copy !req
588. It's all tied up
in investments, so, uh, sorry.Copy !req
589. Sorry?
What do you mean, sorry?Copy !req
590. - No can do.
- What?Copy !req
591. No deal. You have to take
your business elsewhere.Copy !req
592. - What?
- No "cash-ola."Copy !req
593. Uh, wh-wh-what
about, uh... less?Copy !req
594. You make me sick.
Make me an offer.Copy !req
595. Uh, bring—Copy !req
596. Bring... 50,000
in unmarked bills...Copy !req
597. to the same phone
at noon on Thursday.Copy !req
598. Thursday.
Tomorrow's Thursday.
You mean, tomorrow?Copy !req
599. Yes, tomorrow!
Bring 50,000 tomorrow!Copy !req
600. And if I don't?Copy !req
601. Then the next time you see
your wife, pal, will be in the morgue.Copy !req
602. Mr. Stone,
I have bad news.Copy !req
603. We think we've found
your wife.Copy !req
604. We'll need you to come with us
to identify the body.Copy !req
605. That's not her.Copy !req
606. There must be some mistake.Copy !req
607. We want the woman who was
brought in this morning.Copy !req
608. Oh, Jane Doe 56?
She's in the next room.Copy !req
609. It looks like her,
a lot like her.Copy !req
610. But it's not her.Copy !req
611. My Barbara!
She's alive!Copy !req
612. You see her sittin' with
her coffee and her paperCopy !req
613. With her high-top sneakers
of Italian designCopy !req
614. With her long, cool stare
she aggravates attentionCopy !req
615. Makes up her face
while she makes up her mindCopy !req
616. Now you're in trouble
maybe she's an intellectualCopy !req
617. What if she figures out
you're not very smartCopy !req
618. Or maybe she's the quiet type
who's into heavy metalCopy !req
619. You've got to get it settled
'cause she's breakin' your heartCopy !req
620. Don't try
to put on an actCopy !req
621. You can't do that
to a modern womanCopy !req
622. And you're an
old-fashioned manCopy !req
623. She understands
the things you're doin'Copy !req
624. She's a modern womanCopy !req
625. She's a modern womanCopy !req
626. She's a modern womanCopy !req
627. - More!Copy !req
628. Yes?Copy !req
629. Sir, there's someone
on the phone. They say
they sent you that tape.Copy !req
630. Put 'em through,
please.Copy !req
631. Hello.Copy !req
632. Hello. Is this
Chief Benton?Copy !req
633. Uh, y-yes.Copy !req
634. I'm the one who
sent you the tape.Copy !req
635. Have you had
a look at it yet?Copy !req
636. Yes, I just saw it.Copy !req
637. - So, what do you think?
- Well, obviously...Copy !req
638. it's very upsetting.Copy !req
639. - This whole thing's making me ill.
- I agree.Copy !req
640. That poor woman, she had
to go through a living hell.Copy !req
641. - I'd rather die a quick death.
- All right! All right!Copy !req
642. What do you want
from me?Copy !req
643. Well, arresting Sam Stone
would be a good start.Copy !req
644. You want me to
arrest Sam Stone?Copy !req
645. Any special reason why
I should arrest him?Copy !req
646. - For murdering his wife!
- Murder?Copy !req
647. Well, uh,
all right, okay.Copy !req
648. You know, it's not gonna be easy.
I'll need evidence.Copy !req
649. That tape isn't enough
to convince you? Jesus!Copy !req
650. Think of the publicity
you'll get.Copy !req
651. All right, all right.
I'm convinced.Copy !req
652. - I'll have Sam Stone arrested.
- Thank you.Copy !req
653. Sam Stone?Copy !req
654. - Chief Benton.
- The investigation has
taken a new direction.Copy !req
655. We've reason to believe
Stone may have murdered his wife.Copy !req
656. - Mr. Stone? Oh, no.
- You heard me.Copy !req
657. - I want this placed combed until
something is found. Got it?
- Yes, sir.Copy !req
658. Muffy,
there you are.Copy !req
659. Ahh.Copy !req
660. Where have you been,
huh? Good girl.Copy !req
661. Ah, yeah, the big dog
won't hurt you, huh?Copy !req
662. He's just a big—Copy !req
663. Chief Benton!Copy !req
664. - What is it?
- I found this in the backyard.Copy !req
665. Chloroform.
And Officer Williams
found snapshots...Copy !req
666. of Mr. Stone
and another woman.Copy !req
667. Really?Copy !req
668. Jackpot!Copy !req
669. Mr. Kessler?
Ken Kessler?Copy !req
670. - Yes?
- We're police officers.Copy !req
671. I'm Lt. Bender.
This is Lt. Walters.Copy !req
672. May we have a word
with you, please?Copy !req
673. Oh, sure.
Uh—Copy !req
674. Come upstairs.
We can talk in the salesmen's office.Copy !req
675. - Have a seat.
- Thank you.Copy !req
676. Mr. Kessler,
over a week ago...Copy !req
677. a lady named Barbara Stone
was kidnapped from her Bel Air home.Copy !req
678. - Are you familiar with the case?
- Yeah, I read about it.Copy !req
679. We believe the vehicle
the kidnappers used left a
tire print in her driveway.Copy !req
680. We took a mold of that print,
had our lab analyze it, and the
results were rather interesting.Copy !req
681. These are
the prints of the kidnapper's car,Copy !req
682. and these are the prints
of your car.Copy !req
683. Is there a phone
I can use?Copy !req
684. Uh, sure,
it's right over there on the desk.Copy !req
685. Amazing similarity!Copy !req
686. Would you excuse me
for a second?Copy !req
687. I've got to go to the bathroom.
I've got a touch of the stomach flu.Copy !req
688. Sure, go right ahead.Copy !req
689. Chloroform? What
about fingerprints?Copy !req
690. Bingo!
We have a winner.Copy !req
691. You won't believe this.
They found evidence implicating Stone.Copy !req
692. - Stone? You're kidding?
- Chloroform and fingerprints.Copy !req
693. I'll be damned.
Let's get out of here.Copy !req
694. - Where's Kessler?
- In the john.Copy !req
695. Stomach flu.Copy !req
696. Mr. Kessler?Copy !req
697. I'll b-be
right out.Copy !req
698. Don't bother, sir.
Thank you for your help.Copy !req
699. We'll just show
ourselves out.Copy !req
700. - Hello.
- All right, Mr. Stone.Copy !req
701. We came very close
to killing your wife,Copy !req
702. but she begged us repeatedly
for just one more chance.Copy !req
703. So in the spirit of
compassion and mercy,Copy !req
704. we decided not to kill her
just yet.Copy !req
705. Compassion and mercy?Copy !req
706. What the hell's going on
over there? I thought
you people were ruthless!Copy !req
707. - We are, Mr. Stone.
- Then what's this phone call about?Copy !req
708. We called to make you
an offer,Copy !req
709. - an offer even you can't refuse.
- Oh?Copy !req
710. Yeah.
10,000.Copy !req
711. Fat chance!Copy !req
712. Mr. Stone, this is no joke!
We're desperate people.Copy !req
713. I believe this is a joke, pal,
and you're it.Copy !req
714. The last time we spoke,
you said my wife would be...Copy !req
715. in the morgue
if I didn't pay.Copy !req
716. Well, I didn't pay and
today I was at the morgue.Copy !req
717. She wasn't there.
You lied to me.Copy !req
718. - You know what I think of you?
- No.Copy !req
719. You got no nuts!
What do I have to do?Copy !req
720. Put a gun in your hand, aim,
and pull your finger down,
you spineless wimp?Copy !req
721. I dare you
to kill her!Copy !req
722. Now that
oughta do it.Copy !req
723. Hey, you?
Wanna sell me a stereo?Copy !req
724. - Yeah, I'll sell you a stereo.
- All right.Copy !req
725. I'm lookin' for something
real hot. I don't wanna
get ripped off, you know?Copy !req
726. Okay.Copy !req
727. You're looking for some
real hot speakers, right?Copy !req
728. I'm not talking about
something you just listen to.Copy !req
729. - I'm talking about the kind
of sound you can feel.
- Yeah!Copy !req
730. - You know what I mean.
- Yeah!Copy !req
731. When it comes to great stereo,
you can't beat big speakers.Copy !req
732. I'm talking about big speakers
with big woofers like this.Copy !req
733. You can get this. It has
a nice little eight-inch
woofer, or this ten-incher.Copy !req
734. Over here we have
a nice big 12-inch.Copy !req
735. But I can tell by the look
on your face, man, you want
something even bigger.Copy !req
736. - Fuck, yeah!
- "Fuck, yeah" is right.Copy !req
737. We gotta go to
the big room for this!Copy !req
738. The big room!
Check it out, my man.Copy !req
739. The flagship of the
entire Dominator line. The MX-10.Copy !req
740. I have a pair
of these myself.Copy !req
741. 30 inches of thigh-slappin',
blood-pumpin' nuclear brain damage!Copy !req
742. Bitchin'!
Hey, what's the fucking cost?Copy !req
743. That's the bitchin'
part about it. It don't matter.Copy !req
744. If you can't afford it,
fuckin' finance it!Copy !req
745. Yeah!
Whoo!Copy !req
746. So what if it's as big
as a Subaru and costs as much!Copy !req
747. You'll never have
to trade this in.Copy !req
748. This is gonna be with you
for the rest of your life.Copy !req
749. And when you die,
they can bury you in it!Copy !req
750. I want it!Copy !req
751. This guy is okay.
First guy I feel I can really trust.Copy !req
752. Wait a minute.
Why don't I show you something else?Copy !req
753. They're not very big,
but Consumer Stereo
rates them a best buy.Copy !req
754. The Sentry EV-1s.
And they're not gonna break you.Copy !req
755. Pick 'em up.
That's it.Copy !req
756. Kick it out.
Two more.Copy !req
757. That's it!
Whew, I'm pooped.Copy !req
758. - Let's take a break.
- Take a break?
Come on, you little wimp!Copy !req
759. Let's go!Copy !req
760. Here's your lunch.Copy !req
761. It's fruit salad.
You seem to like that the most,Copy !req
762. although you still don't eat
as much as you should.Copy !req
763. My body's become a
more efficient machine.
I go farther with less food.Copy !req
764. You must be in
pretty good shape by now.Copy !req
765. You certainly look good.Copy !req
766. You've lost a lot
of weight.Copy !req
767. Huh?
What?Copy !req
768. Oh, yeah, you've lost a lot
of weight, at least 20 pounds.Copy !req
769. What?Copy !req
770. Tw—Copy !req
771. Do you have
a scale?Copy !req
772. - I don't know how to thank you!
- Thank me?Copy !req
773. I've been to...
ten different fat farms in,Copy !req
774. God, I don't know
how many years.Copy !req
775. And I lost a total,
a total of six pounds.Copy !req
776. I have lost
20 pounds!Copy !req
777. I wasn't sure,
but...Copy !req
778. it felt thin.Copy !req
779. You wouldn't have a—
never mind.Copy !req
780. - A— A what?
- No, no, no.Copy !req
781. It's very silly.Copy !req
782. No, what?
Please tell me.Copy !req
783. All my life I wanted to have
a slinky little figure...Copy !req
784. so I could wear some
Bill Blass or Valentino,Copy !req
785. some exotic evening gown
like Christian Dior, Jerry Galanos.Copy !req
786. Are you kidding me?
You're kidding me, aren't you?Copy !req
787. I'm sorry. I know
it's ridiculous to think
that somebody of your,Copy !req
788. - well, moderate means—
- I'll be right back.
Just don't go anywhere.Copy !req
789. - Sam Stone?
- Yeah?Copy !req
790. Mr. Stone,
you're under arrest.Copy !req
791. For mixing
cotton with silk?Copy !req
792. This is absolutely
beautiful!Copy !req
793. Whose design is this?
Is this Bill Blass? Albert Nipon?Copy !req
794. - Nah, too conventional.
- Halston?Copy !req
795. I know who did it.
Oscar de la Renta.Copy !req
796. I designed it.Copy !req
797. Get outta here!
Really? Wow!Copy !req
798. You're a professional.Copy !req
799. - Nah.
- You are! This is sensational.
Do you have any more?Copy !req
800. Wait!Copy !req
801. I won't do you no harm
noCopy !req
802. You've got to be all mine
all mineCopy !req
803. Ooh, foxy ladyCopy !req
804. FoxyCopy !req
805. So, Sam told you
I was his partner?Copy !req
806. No way! He was
just passing the buck.Copy !req
807. Oh, God.Copy !req
808. So, when do I
get out of here?Copy !req
809. As soon as Mr. Stone
pays the ransom.Copy !req
810. What's the problem?
What is the ransom?Copy !req
811. It, it was $500,000.Copy !req
812. That shouldn't be
a problem.Copy !req
813. He complained.Copy !req
814. He complained?Copy !req
815. And then we dropped our price
to $50,000.Copy !req
816. - Yeah?
- He didn't pay.Copy !req
817. He didn't pay?Copy !req
818. So now what?Copy !req
819. So now...Copy !req
820. we're dropping our price again
to $10,000.Copy !req
821. Do I understand this
correctly?Copy !req
822. I'm being
marked down?Copy !req
823. What is this?
The bargain basement?Copy !req
824. I've been kidnapped
by Kmart!Copy !req
825. Don't cry, Barbara.Copy !req
826. Hey, check it out.Copy !req
827. You sure got
a pretty mouth.Copy !req
828. All right, Stone,
let's go.Copy !req
829. - Hey, was it something I said?
- Yeah.Copy !req
830. Although this is
a capital crime,Copy !req
831. the accused is an upstanding
member of the community,Copy !req
832. a responsible and
successful businessman...Copy !req
833. and has never before
posed a threat to society.Copy !req
834. Bail will be granted
and set at...Copy !req
835. - $700,000.
- You want to try for a reduction?Copy !req
836. No, pay the ticket
and let's get the hell out of here.Copy !req
837. That filthy slug!
That screeching little witch!Copy !req
838. - That pasty-faced troll!
- The judge?Copy !req
839. My wife!
I gotta get her back!Copy !req
840. - Sandy?
- Kenny?Copy !req
841. It's over. Sam isn't going
to pay the ransom.Copy !req
842. He couldn't care less.
I'm no criminal.Copy !req
843. I can't even sell retail...
and that's legal.Copy !req
844. - We gotta get packing
and get outta here.
- Oh, Kenny!Copy !req
845. I've got some very
interesting news for you.Copy !req
846. I am the new rising star...Copy !req
847. - in high fashion!
- Let's get a grip on ourselves.Copy !req
848. Try to be calm. We're
going down to Mexico
for a couple of years.Copy !req
849. - We can camp on the beach.
- Does that mean we let Barbara go?Copy !req
850. - We're not going
to take her with us.
- Good.Copy !req
851. - 'Cause I've already let her go.
- What? You let her go?Copy !req
852. Oh, my God!Copy !req
853. - You didn't let her
just run right out of here?
- Yeah!Copy !req
854. - Oh, my God!
- Why not?Copy !req
855. She knows where we live.
She'll turn us in.
The police will be here.Copy !req
856. You don't understand.
She really likes us now.Copy !req
857. I showed her my gowns.
She loves them.Copy !req
858. We're all going into
business together.Copy !req
859. - We're gonna open our
fall line in Paris.
- She told you this?Copy !req
860. Yes. She really,
truly loves me.Copy !req
861. She can be trusted.
She's changed!Copy !req
862. Changed? What'd you do?
Perform an exorcism?Copy !req
863. Ken, she lost
nearly 20 pounds.Copy !req
864. Well, you just had to be there.
It was a very special moment.Copy !req
865. I'm surprised
they knocked.Copy !req
866. Good afternoon.
We're wondering if
you've seen this man.Copy !req
867. He was sighted in the area
a few weeks ago and then
again this morning.Copy !req
868. He's psychotic, extremely
dangerous and violent.Copy !req
869. - He's killed half a dozen people.
- I gotta get outta here.Copy !req
870. My wife,
she's late for work.Copy !req
871. Doesn't look familiar.Copy !req
872. Keep this and give us a call
at this number in case you do see him.Copy !req
873. Under no circumstances should
you try to subdue him yourself.
He's extremely violent.Copy !req
874. He looks it. Thank you
very much, Officer.Copy !req
875. Sandy?Copy !req
876. It's okay.
It's okay!Copy !req
877. They're looking
for somebody else.Copy !req
878. I'll get the other suitcase
from the basement.Copy !req
879. Hello?Copy !req
880. Hello?Copy !req
881. Anybody home?Copy !req
882. Oh, hello. Are you a friend
of Ken and Sandy's?Copy !req
883. You...
look like my mother.Copy !req
884. I hate my mother.Copy !req
885. No.Copy !req
886. You— You look
just like my father.Copy !req
887. I hate my father!Copy !req
888. Jesus.Copy !req
889. What the hell was that?Copy !req
890. Honey, don't touch him.Copy !req
891. Oh, my God.
It's the bedroom killer.Copy !req
892. He told me I look
like his mother.Copy !req
893. He hates his mother.Copy !req
894. He's dead.Copy !req
895. So, if I look like his mother...Copy !req
896. and you look like
his father,Copy !req
897. this is what our son
would look like.Copy !req
898. - Pretty strong argument
for birth control.
- What do we do now?Copy !req
899. Barbara, what
are you doing here?Copy !req
900. I got it! I tell you, I've got it.Copy !req
901. Listen to this.
All right.Copy !req
902. Sam arrives on a motorcycle
wearing shorts, no shoes,
no shirt, nothing.Copy !req
903. Maybe we'll just put him
in a jockstrap.Copy !req
904. We send him all over town in
the middle of a hot, sunny day.Copy !req
905. Sam burns real easily.
He'll be bright red.Copy !req
906. I can't believe
this is happening.Copy !req
907. Then he's got to cover himself
with honey and go to a bee farm.Copy !req
908. - We make him dance so
the bees go absolutely nuts!
- I don't think she really—Copy !req
909. Then we all watch while
they sting him to death!Copy !req
910. Yeah!Copy !req
911. Don't we want a punishment
that'll keep stinging him
the rest of his life?Copy !req
912. My God, he must've been
seeing this woman for years.Copy !req
913. Castrate him!
I want to castrate him.Copy !req
914. Wouldn't it be better
if we struck at the core
of Sam's being,Copy !req
915. - his reason for living?
- What would that be?Copy !req
916. His testicles!Copy !req
917. Would you know in
complete detail what Sam's
total net worth would be,Copy !req
918. not just the big stuff,
the little stuff too,
down to the last penny?Copy !req
919. Yeah...
I think so.Copy !req
920. Good. I want you
to write it down in
as much detail as you can.Copy !req
921. Fire up the stove.
Get the tofu burgers
from the freezer.Copy !req
922. We're calling Sam.Copy !req
923. My tux,
my silk tux.Copy !req
924. Et tu, Adolph?
Et tu?Copy !req
925. - Hello?
- Hi, Sam.Copy !req
926. Oh, thank God it's you!
I've been thinking about
your last offer.Copy !req
927. I think you're right.
I cannot refuse.Copy !req
928. $10,000 is fair
and totally acceptable.Copy !req
929. She's in bad shape, Sam.
We've been torturing her.Copy !req
930. - Aaah!Copy !req
931. - Aaah!
- Don't kill her!Copy !req
932. We found out your wife
is worth quite a bit
more than $10,000.Copy !req
933. - What do you mean?
- We changed our minds.Copy !req
934. We've upped
the ransom.Copy !req
935. - To what?
- We're up to $2 million.Copy !req
936. $2 million?Copy !req
937. You outta your fucking mind?
Where'd you get an incredible
figure like that?Copy !req
938. Oh, you'd be surprised at
the quality and quantity...Copy !req
939. of information a
lit cigarette can provide.Copy !req
940. - What else?
- Shh!Copy !req
941. Gems! He's got
rare gems in the safe.
Oh, Sam, forgive me.Copy !req
942. - What kind of gems? How many?
- I don't know.Copy !req
943. - Aaah!Copy !req
944. Aaah!Copy !req
945. Four flawless
one-karat diamonds!Copy !req
946. The bitch blabbed.Copy !req
947. Apparently, you got
a million-two built up in
equity on Sam's Sportswear,Copy !req
948. another 350,000
in your pension plan.Copy !req
949. General Dynamics closed
at 75 and 3/4 today,Copy !req
950. which brings another
175,000 to the party.Copy !req
951. 45,000 for the Excalibur
and now there's the four
one-karat diamonds in the safe.Copy !req
952. You inhuman slime!Copy !req
953. After his release yesterday,Copy !req
954. Mr. Stone continued
to deny the charges...Copy !req
955. despite what the district
attorney's office insists
is overwhelming evidence.Copy !req
956. Overwhelming evidence is right!
What more do they want?Copy !req
957. How could
they let him go?Copy !req
958. - Hello?
- Hello. It's me again.Copy !req
959. I see Sam Stone's
been released.Copy !req
960. It's not easy keeping a man in jail
with these liberal courts.Copy !req
961. A man is innocent
until proven guilty.Copy !req
962. Well, how do you think
these courts would feel...Copy !req
963. - if I gave that tape to the media?
- Oh, my... God.Copy !req
964. Yeah!
They'd go crazy for it.Copy !req
965. They love to show
sick stuff like that.Copy !req
966. It'd probably be on national TV
24 hours a day for weeks!Copy !req
967. I bet that'd get
a hell of a reaction.Copy !req
968. Please, please
don't do that.Copy !req
969. Where's your sense
of compassion?Copy !req
970. Why do you have
to be so vicious?Copy !req
971. Vicious?
Have you seen that tape?Copy !req
972. Come on!
What's the big deal?Copy !req
973. It's just a lonely man who
wanted a little excitement.Copy !req
974. That kind of thing happens every day.
Everybody does it!Copy !req
975. I don't believe this.Copy !req
976. I don't believe
you said that!Copy !req
977. Men get the urge.Copy !req
978. - We're only human.
- You're sick.Copy !req
979. Hello? No,
don't hang up on me!Copy !req
980. - So, what'd he say?
- Something strange
is happening here.Copy !req
981. Either the chief
is a complete moron,Copy !req
982. and complete
morons are rare,Copy !req
983. or he's playing games
with me.Copy !req
984. We better find someplace
where we can look at that tape.Copy !req
985. - This is perfect.
- It is?Copy !req
986. Give me the tape.Copy !req
987. Okay.Copy !req
988. - Ho, ho-ho!Copy !req
989. - You idiot! This isn't Sam.
- And he isn't killing her.Copy !req
990. That's my husband!Copy !req
991. Barbara really
was kidnapped.Copy !req
992. She really was kidnapped!
I didn't kill her.Copy !req
993. Please believe me.
You gotta be there.Copy !req
994. They're coming
this time for sure.Copy !req
995. I think the deli's using
a different mustard.
The last time it was tangier.Copy !req
996. Jesus Christ!
I'm pleading for my life...Copy !req
997. and you're discussing
the inconsistency of
lunch meat condiments!Copy !req
998. Haven't you heard
a word I've said?Copy !req
999. God!Copy !req
1000. I'm sorry, Mr. Stone,
but since the house
is in your wife's name,Copy !req
1001. as well as her other
15 million in assets,Copy !req
1002. you're not legally
entitled to it as long
as your wife is alive.Copy !req
1003. However, you've got
a million-two built up
in equity in your business,Copy !req
1004. another 350,000
in your pension plan.Copy !req
1005. You'd have no problem
using that as collateral.Copy !req
1006. All right.
Let's do it!Copy !req
1007. - Hello?
- Sam?Copy !req
1008. Carol! Where the hell
have you been?
I've called you 100 times.Copy !req
1009. Sam, I miss you.
How have you been?Copy !req
1010. I'm going crazy over
this kidnapping thing.Copy !req
1011. - And the cops won't do
a damn thing to help me.
- Why?Copy !req
1012. They don't believe me.
They think I made up
the kidnapping.Copy !req
1013. They won't even show up
at the ransom drop to see
if I'm telling the truth!Copy !req
1014. You're gonna be all by
yourself? That's terrible.Copy !req
1015. How much money
is it?Copy !req
1016. - $2.2 million.
- Cash?Copy !req
1017. Of course it's cash.Copy !req
1018. Have you ever heard of
a kidnapper taking a check?Copy !req
1019. Where are you going
to give them the money?Copy !req
1020. I mean, I, I hope
it isn't dangerous.Copy !req
1021. I've gotta go to
a phone booth...Copy !req
1022. on Hope Street Plaza.Copy !req
1023. - Hello?
- Sam!Copy !req
1024. It's so nice to
hear your voice.
How's Muffy?Copy !req
1025. Listen, Sam,
we don't have much time.Copy !req
1026. There's a gun
pointed at my head.Copy !req
1027. They're making me give
the ransom instructions in
case the police are listening.Copy !req
1028. You must make sure
there are no police,
otherwise they'll kill me.Copy !req
1029. Nope. No cops.Copy !req
1030. Now, have you got
all the money?Copy !req
1031. $2.2 million in unmarked,
nonsequential bills?Copy !req
1032. You miserable
scum-sucking pig!Copy !req
1033. Oh, honey, I'm so sorry.
They made me say that.Copy !req
1034. - Yeah, I got all the money.
- It's there in the briefcase?Copy !req
1035. You scumbag!
You lowlife motherfucker!Copy !req
1036. Oh dear.
They made me say that too.Copy !req
1037. - It's in the case, yeah.
- The Rolex too? The gold Rolex?Copy !req
1038. Who said anything about the Rolex?
They never mentioned the Rolex.Copy !req
1039. They want the Rolex
and your pinkie ring!Copy !req
1040. Honey, they tortured me with cigars.
I had to tell them everything.Copy !req
1041. All right.
What else?Copy !req
1042. That's it!
Just wait there.Copy !req
1043. Bag, please.Copy !req
1044. Come on,
give me the bag!Copy !req
1045. Freeze!Copy !req
1046. Put the bag down and
put your hands on your head.Copy !req
1047. Bender!Copy !req
1048. They're from the government.
They're here to help you.Copy !req
1049. I said no police.
Do you know what this means?Copy !req
1050. Stay back.Copy !req
1051. They touch me and I give
the order to kill! Got it?Copy !req
1052. Leave me alone
or she's a dead woman.Copy !req
1053. - You want her blood on your hands?
- What do you think?Copy !req
1054. - Let's just follow him home.
- Okay, let him go.Copy !req
1055. What?Copy !req
1056. - What are you doing?
- Gimme it!Copy !req
1057. Let go.
Tell him to let go.Copy !req
1058. - If he doesn't let go
I give the order.
- Go ahead, give the order.Copy !req
1059. Let go!
She's a dead woman if he doesn't!Copy !req
1060. All right,Copy !req
1061. drop it.Copy !req
1062. Punk.Copy !req
1063. Hello?Copy !req
1064. Hello?Copy !req
1065. This is Lt. Bender.
What are you doing?Copy !req
1066. I'm taking my money.
You got your man.
The rest is your problem.Copy !req
1067. Mr. Stone, you may be guilty
of obstructing justice,
aiding and abetting a felon,Copy !req
1068. accomplice to kidnapping
and possibly murder.Copy !req
1069. My advice to you is
to drop the gun, give back the bag.Copy !req
1070. We have 150 officers,
75 cars and two helicopters.
He won't get away.Copy !req
1071. - That's better.
- Here!Copy !req
1072. What are
you doing here?Copy !req
1073. Tell them to get out
of here! If they don't go, she's dead!Copy !req
1074. All right, gentlemen,
clear the street, please.Copy !req
1075. You too, Mr. Stone.
Back away.Copy !req
1076. That's better.Copy !req
1077. You can go now.Copy !req
1078. Don't follow me.
Understand?Copy !req
1079. We understand.Copy !req
1080. - Don't move!
- Who the hell are you?Copy !req
1081. What the hell
is going on?Copy !req
1082. I'm robbing you!Copy !req
1083. - Stop him!Copy !req
1084. - Did you shoot at me?
- No, you moron.
There's police all over.Copy !req
1085. Hundreds of 'em!Copy !req
1086. Do I look
that stupid?Copy !req
1087. Yes, you do!Copy !req
1088. If you shot at me,
where's your gun?Copy !req
1089. Well, you're too sharp for me!
You got me figured out.Copy !req
1090. I don't have one.Copy !req
1091. That was
a brand new tire.Copy !req
1092. Give me your keys.Copy !req
1093. - I don't believe this!
- Give the bag to Bozo,Copy !req
1094. drop the gun and
put your hands in the air.Copy !req
1095. Who said that?Copy !req
1096. This could very well
be the stupidest person
on the face of the earth.Copy !req
1097. Perhaps we should
shoot him.Copy !req
1098. It's the police department.Copy !req
1099. Really?Copy !req
1100. No! We're the National
Rifle Association!Copy !req
1101. Christ!Copy !req
1102. I'm leaving now.
They said they wouldn't follow me.Copy !req
1103. HeyCopy !req
1104. Stand upCopy !req
1105. Ruthless PeopleCopy !req
1106. Watch yourselfCopy !req
1107. HeyCopy !req
1108. Stand upCopy !req
1109. Ruthless PeopleCopy !req
1110. Ruthless PeopleCopy !req
1111. You can have it
if you want itCopy !req
1112. It might take
the rest of your lifeCopy !req
1113. If you want it
you can have itCopy !req
1114. - Ruthless People
- They're still following me.Copy !req
1115. I should have known.
I knew this wouldn't work.Copy !req
1116. You can't trust
the police!Copy !req
1117. Oh, God.
Oh... boy.Copy !req
1118. - He's cornered and he knows it.
- I hope he doesn't hurt anybody.Copy !req
1119. I'm not going to jail!
I'm not going to jail!Copy !req
1120. Oh, my God!Copy !req
1121. Hey, look out!Copy !req
1122. Watch it!Copy !req
1123. Somebody help! He'll drown!Copy !req
1124. - The water's way too cold.
- There's riptides.Copy !req
1125. - I've seen sharks.
- Somebody call an ambulance.Copy !req
1126. Look there!Copy !req
1127. That's money!Copy !req
1128. My money!Copy !req
1129. Let's get the coast guard
and fish him out.Copy !req
1130. You can't do that!Copy !req
1131. That's not your money!Copy !req
1132. That's my money!
Stop 'em!Copy !req
1133. Aaah!Copy !req
1134. The bedroom killer!Copy !req
1135. What about the money?Copy !req
1136. They recovered a
few thousand dollars.
The rest washed away.Copy !req
1137. He said if anything
went wrong,Copy !req
1138. they'd kill Barbara.Copy !req
1139. Things couldn't have gone more
wrong than this, could they?Copy !req
1140. That means she's dead.Copy !req
1141. - Mrs. Stone!
- I'll be damned!Copy !req
1142. - Mrs. Stone?
- Yes.Copy !req
1143. I'm Lt. Walters.
We're glad to see you're okay.Copy !req
1144. I'm sorry to have to ask
you to do this right now,Copy !req
1145. but I'm afraid we need you
to identify the body.Copy !req
1146. Yes!
That's him!Copy !req
1147. Oh, I could
never forget that face.Copy !req
1148. What hell
he put me through.Copy !req
1149. - You're sure he worked alone?
- Positive.Copy !req
1150. - He mentioned a partner.
- He was schizophrenic.
He thought he had partners.Copy !req
1151. Where's Sam?Copy !req
1152. He's over there,
Mrs. Stone.Copy !req
1153. Would you excuse me
for a moment?Copy !req
1154. I'd just like to be alone
with my husband.Copy !req
1155. - Certainly.
- Thank you.Copy !req
1156. Hello, Sam.Copy !req
1157. Barbara!Copy !req
1158. You look terrific!Copy !req
1159. You think so?Copy !req
1160. I mean,Copy !req
1161. - you're so thin.
- Really?Copy !req
1162. Does it show?Copy !req
1163. I mean,
you're beautiful!Copy !req
1164. - Oh, Sam!
- Oh, Barbara!Copy !req
1165. I hope my marriage
is as strong as theirs after 15 years.Copy !req
1166. I can't believe
we doubted Stone's
affection for his wife.Copy !req
1167. - We almost blew it.
Thank God she's alive.Copy !req
1168. Ol' buddy, you work,
you put in long hours.
It's a tough beat.Copy !req
1169. But it all seems worth it
when you get a moment like this.Copy !req
1170. Yeah, I love a happy ending.Copy !req
1171. Barbara!Copy !req
1172. You see her sittin'
with a coffee and a paperCopy !req
1173. With her high-top sneakers
of Italian designCopy !req
1174. With her long, cool stare
she aggravates attentionCopy !req
1175. Makes up her face
while she makes up her mindCopy !req
1176. Now you're in trouble
maybe she's an intellectualCopy !req
1177. What if she figures out
you're not very smartCopy !req
1178. Maybe she's the quiet type
who's into heavy metalCopy !req
1179. You've got to get it settled
'cause she's breaking your heartCopy !req
1180. Don't try to
put on an actCopy !req
1181. You can't do that
to a modern womanCopy !req
1182. When you're an
old-fashioned manCopy !req
1183. She understands
the things you're doingCopy !req
1184. She's a modern womanCopy !req
1185. She looks sleek
she seems so professionalCopy !req
1186. She's got a lot of confidence
it's easy to seeCopy !req
1187. You want to make a move
but you feel so inferiorCopy !req
1188. 'Cause under that exterior
is someone who's sleekCopy !req
1189. She's got style
she's got her own moneyCopy !req
1190. So she's not another honey
you can quickly disarmCopy !req
1191. She's got the eyes
that make you realizeCopy !req
1192. She won't be hypnotized
by your usual charmCopy !req
1193. You've got your plan of attack
that won't attract
a modern womanCopy !req
1194. When you're an
old-fashioned manCopy !req
1195. She understands
the things you're doin'Copy !req
1196. She's a modern womanCopy !req
1197. As time goes by and
you're sharing an apartmentCopy !req
1198. She says she loves you
but she doesn't know whyCopy !req
1199. The morning she gives you
your coffee and your paperCopy !req
1200. It's a strange situation
for an old-fashioned guyCopy !req
1201. But times have changed
things are not the same, babyCopy !req
1202. You won't be changed
it's your bad attitudeCopy !req
1203. Rock'n'roll just used
to be for kicks and
nowadays it's politicsCopy !req
1204. And after 1986
what else could be newCopy !req
1205. You've got to learn
to relax and face
the facts of a modern womanCopy !req
1206. And you're an
old-fashioned manCopy !req
1207. She understands
the things you're doin'Copy !req
1208. She's a modern womanCopy !req
1209. She's a modern womanCopy !req