- 1. Everyone has their path in life,
- 2. And this is more or
less where mine started.
- 3. My name is Norbit Albert
Rice, and I was an orphan.
- 4. I like to think my
parents loved me very much,
- 5. But just didn't have the
means to properly care for me.
- 6. I can see them researching all
of the orphanages in the area,
- 7. Agonizing over their choices,
- 8. Trying to make sure
their precious little boy
- 9. Was raised in the perfect environment.
- 10. Ling Ling! Someone left another one!
- 11. Coyotes, go! Get! Back! Back, coyotes!
- 12. Get out here! You not eat another baby.
- 13. Oh, crap. Another black one.
- 14. Can't give these away.
- 15. You ugly black one, too.
You be here long time.
- 16. Nobody ever come and say,
"Give me the ugly, black one."
- 17. You very ugly baby. The
ugliest baby I ever seen.
- 18. A lot of people think that
orphanages are cold and scary,
- 19. But the Golden Wonton was
a great place to grow up.
- 20. We had everything normal
children had. Pets...
- 21. Here. Play with that.
- 22. a big backyard, and
lots of kids to play with.
- 23. Ling Ling! The children
got in MSG barrel.
- 24. Now all their hair gonna fall out again.
- 25. You stupid orphan!
Nobody want a bald orphan!
- 26. Norbit, how you find
family with no hair?
- 27. Nobody want a bald Norbit!
- 28. What the hell wrong
with the children here?
- 29. Mr. Wong was a very interesting man.
- 30. In addition to his love for children
and preparation of fine Asian cuisine,
- 31. He had a real passion
for oldtime whallng.
- 32. It's a whale, ho!
- 33. Die, you sonofa!
- 34. Bingo! Right in the blow hole!
- 35. Norbit, where you go? Why
you run off like little bitch?
- 36. After Marvin Browning got lost
downtown for a couple of weeks,
- 37. The orphanage started
using a buddy system.
- 38. Go, Norbit!
- 39. My buddy was little Kate.
- 40. Go, Norbit! Go, Norbit!
- 41. That's okay. You're doing good.
- 42. Kate and I were always
together. Playing checkers...
- 43. Oh, man. Yes!
- 44. watching scary movies.
- 45. Why, we even pooped together.
- 46. And then one day, Kate and I
decided that we should tie the knot.
- 47. We got married under
the great big oak tree.
- 48. I now pronounce you my wife.
- 49. And I pronounce you my husband.
- 50. It's watermelon.
- 51. Yours is green apple.
- 52. I think it's time for us to kiss now.
- 53. And we lived happily ever after
- 54. For about two weeks
until she got adopted.
- 55. Bye, Norbit.
- 56. I didn't do too much
bike riding after that.
- 57. When Kate left, there was an odd
number of kids at the orphanage,
- 58. So I was buddyless for a while.
- 59. And sometimes I'd get a little sad,
- 60. But I never lost hope.
- 61. I knew that someday I'd find another
somebody to share my life with.
- 62. All I had to do was just be patient.
- 63. What'd you do that for?
Because we felt like it.
- 64. What are you gonna do about it?
What are you gonna do about it?
- 65. Loser.
- 66. Stop it.
- 67. Leave him alone.
- 68. Says who? Says who?
- 69. Who are you? Rasputia. What's your name?
- 70. Norbit. Norbit? That's a stupid name.
- 71. Why'd you beat those
boys up? To protect you.
- 72. You got a girlfriend, Nesbit? Norbit.
- 73. No.
- 74. Well, you do now. Get your
ass up and hold my hand.
- 75. Okay. How you doing?
- 76. Everything changed once I
had Rasputia as my girlfriend.
- 77. We took care of each other,
- 78. And the other kids
started to respect me.
- 79. I'll take...
- 80. Norbit. Come on.
- 81. And because of Rasputia, for
the first time in my life,
- 82. I had a real family.
- 83. Rasputia had three brothers.
- 84. Big Black Jack. He was the oldest.
- 85. Leg.
- 86. Then, there was Blue.
- 87. Breasts.
- 88. And Earl. He was the baby.
- 89. Wing.
- 90. They sure loved their little sister,
- 91. And so they treated me
like one of their own.
- 92. Here you go, Norbit. Saved
the best piece for you.
- 93. What's that? Turkey ass. Eat up, sucker.
- 94. Bon appetitty.
- 95. Bon appetitty.
- 96. The Latimores had a reputation
- 97. For being the meanest,
nastiest people in town,
- 98. But that's just because
folks didn't know them.
- 99. They were actually very
nice, hardworking people.
- 100. They ran the local construction company,
- 101. And recently, responding to
the needs of the community...
- 102. Yo, Morris.
- 103. had opened a little
- 104. It was a surprisingly popular
service among the local vendors.
- 105. Hey, you don't shake me down.
I'm Italian. I shake you down.
- 106. Is that right? Yes.
- 107. Get his ass in here.
- 108. I'm in.
- 109. As time passed, Rasputia
and I got closer and closer,
- 110. In high school and as adults.
- 111. I started working as a bookkeeper
in her family's business.
- 112. I'm expecting some important
calls today, Norbit,
- 113. So when you answer the
phone, try and sound white.
- 114. So when you answer the
phone, try and sound white.
- 115. It was like everything was
finally coming together.
- 116. Yes.
- 117. Of course, it was only
natural that Rasputia and l
- 118. Would take the next
step in our relationship.
- 119. I now pronounce you man and wife.
- 120. You may kiss the bride.
- 121. Open your mouth.
- 122. Go, Rasputia!
- 123. It was a storybook wedding,
- 124. The beginning of a brandnew chapter.
- 125. I knew I would never be lonely again.
I had found my place in the world.
- 126. Poor Norbit. Man.
- 127. Back when I was in the
game, I used to tell my hos,
- 128. "Hos, ain't no man gonna pay for the
cow if he can get the milk for free."
- 129. You ain't got to worry about
this brother buying the milk,
- 130. 'Cause he just bought
the whole damn cow.
- 131. That's a special cow, too.
- 132. That must be where buttermilk come from.
- 133. Sing that shit, girl.
- 134. Them are not dimples. Them
are potholes in her ass.
- 135. Look like an Escalade
in a wedding dress.
- 136. It a horror show.
- 137. Norbit. What a woman you got.
- 138. Hi, fellows. We're all
jealous, right, boys?
- 139. Oh, yeah. Way jealous.
Wish I had one like that.
- 140. Norbit, let me talk to you for a second.
- 141. Look, just so we clear.
- 142. If you ever hurt my sister in any way,
- 143. Make her cry, even
make her sad one time,
- 144. I'm coming at you with
razor blades and lemon juice.
- 145. You hear me? Yes.
- 146. I'm talking pain, boy.
- 147. Searing, mindnumbing pain.
- 148. I understand.
- 149. You understand me? Yes, yes, yes.
- 150. All right.
- 151. Welcome to the family. Thank you.
- 152. Somebody is take a big
hunk out of my cake!
- 153. What y'all looking at?
I ain't had no cake.
- 154. You better mind your damn business.
- 155. Hey, hey! Everyone!
- 156. I am Mr. Wong. I am best man in wedding.
- 157. I feel it my place to say something,
make a toast to bride and groom,
- 158. Tell story about Norbit.
I like Norbit father.
- 159. I raise Norbit. He like my own child.
- 160. And I want to say that I
very, very confused, Norbit,
- 161. That you... You marry Latimore.
- 162. I don't understand it, because
when you was a little boy, you say,
- 163. "One day I find the girl of my
dreams." And then you marry a gorilla.
- 164. I joke, I joke, I joke.
- 165. Why you not know joke
when you hear joke?
- 166. Why you wanna make fight at wedding?
- 167. Cool off, before I have to
bust somebody ass in here. Okay.
- 168. When Norbit just little boy,
- 169. He like to always run all
over place naked. Always naked.
- 170. And Norbit, when he was just little boy,
had a peepee the size of an egg roll.
- 171. You know, Norbit. That's true.
- 172. And one day, down by creek,
Norbit run around naked
- 173. And poisonous snake jump up
and bite Norbit right on ass.
- 174. Very close to hole.
- 175. Norbit pass out. I think Norbit is dead.
- 176. I go to check the boy pulse.
He still allve. He still allve!
- 177. "Okay," I say, "I must do
something to save child."
- 178. So, I start to think,
- 179. "Do I suck poison out of
Norbit's ass or do I let him die?"
- 180. I do the most responsible thing.
- 181. I say, "Hell to the no!
- 182. "Norbit is out of here,
- 183. "Because it is long time in hell
- 184. "Before Wong suck poison
out of another man's ass."
- 185. But strange, mystical
thing happen, Norbit.
- 186. Even though poison is
in Norbit, he not die.
- 187. Norbit get stronger and stronger.
- 188. That why I know, Norbit, deep
down inside, you very, very strong.
- 189. You strong like warrior.
- 190. That's why I say to you,
Norbit, you can survive anything.
- 191. Even...
- 192. So I say to everyone
here, and to Norbit,
- 193. I wish you much happiness
and peace and love,
- 194. And lots of bananas
for your new gorilla.
- 195. I only kidding. To Norbit and Rasputia.
- 196. Norbit, you know what
would be so romantic?
- 197. If you'd carry me over the threshold
like a little chocolate drop.
- 198. Be delicate, now.
- 199. Put your back into it.
- 200. Come on, now. Be a
man. You ain't no man.
- 201. Pathetic.
- 202. Rasputia, I know we're both nervous
because we've never done this before,
- 203. But we can take our time,
darling. Ln sweet time.
- 204. Rasputia was so full of love.
- 205. Merry Christmas!
- 206. Ho, ho, ho!
- 207. It was a love that sustained
us through the years.
- 208. Halt!
- 209. 187. Officer down.
- 210. And it's still going strong.
- 211. Happy Presidents' Day!
- 212. God bless America.
- 213. And so, we began our life together,
like any other happily married couple.
- 214. Morning, Rasputia.
- 215. "Morning, Rasputia," my ass.
- 216. I tell you what. You better do
something about that goddamn dog,
- 217. Because I ain't gonna
be getting terrorized
- 218. By no dog on my own property.
- 219. I'm sick of it! I'm gonna go out
and purchase me a pellet rifle!
- 220. And then I'm gonna give
him something to bark about
- 221. When I start popping pellets in
his little bugeyed bastard's ass.
- 222. Messing around with you, now I'm
gonna be late for dance class.
- 223. God damn it, Norbit.
- 224. How many times I got to tell you, when
you drive my car, don't adjust my seat!
- 225. I haven't touched your seat.
Then why is it up so damn far?
- 226. It looks like it's back as
far as it goes, Rasputia.
- 227. No, you moved it. I
can tell, 'cause look,
- 228. When I inhale, my titty
make the horn honk. Listen.
- 229. You see that?
- 230. That ain't right. I hear it.
- 231. That scientifically prove
that you was adjusting my seat.
- 232. That's not science. It
is. Now just let it go.
- 233. It's not science. I said let it go.
- 234. I'm just... I said it
was science, God damn it.
- 235. Why you think I want to sell
Golden Wonton Restaurant?
- 236. I got a good business.
- 237. It practically run itself.
I make a lot of money here.
- 238. Every man got a price. We
think this might be yours.
- 239. And here is my counteroffer.
- 240. Excuse me. All right, it's go time.
- 241. I not like rest of town people.
I not intimidated by Latimore.
- 242. You wrong, Wong. Relax, man. Be
cool with that thing, Mr. Wong.
- 243. Ling Ling, get my pistol!
- 244. That dude is crazy. Let's
get the hell out of here!
- 245. I never sell to Latimore! Ever! Ever!
- 246. All right! Y'all ready,
class? Are y'all ready?
- 247. We gonna perforate! We gonna penetrate!
- 248. We gonna percolate!
- 249. We gonna palpitate!
- 250. All because we wanna master the
bate, the art of powertap the fat.
- 251. Come on, and powertap the fat.
Take that, powertap the fat.
- 252. Hey, you get your
skinny ass out of my way.
- 253. One, two, three, four. I stepped
in poo, better wipe it off.
- 254. One, two, three, four.
One, two, three, four.
- 255. I stepped in poo, better wipe
it off. One, two, three, four.
- 256. Ride the horse. Ride the horse!
- 257. Keep bucking, y'all!
Keep bucking! And slide!
- 258. Click clackety clack! Come on, slide!
Click clackety clack! Just slide!
- 259. Here come the cops. Here come the cops.
- 260. They take me to jail.
They take me to jail.
- 261. Riverdance. Come on, white people.
Riverdance. Come on, white people.
- 262. Riverdance. Come on.
- 263. Now, pump, pump, pump, pump, pump me up.
- 264. Pump, pump, pump, pump, pump me down.
- 265. And one, two, three, four, five, six,
seven, eight, nine, ten, eleven, twelve.
- 266. And stretch it out. Work
your whole bicuspids area,
- 267. Your whole bilaterals
and bisexuals. Very good.
- 268. Excuse me, Buster?
- 269. I think I need a little
adjustment over here.
- 270. Look at you, looking like
the Great Pumpkin, girl.
- 271. Trick or treat. What's going on?
- 272. Well, see, I was born with a trick
hip and it made me real bendy.
- 273. See, I'm just like licorice. Look.
- 274. Goddamn, girl, that look
like the harvest moon.
- 275. Turn a brother to a werewolf.
You just need to stop.
- 276. You know what? Do you
do any private lessons?
- 277. I could do private lessons if
you could do me a little favor.
- 278. What's that?
- 279. Just need you talk to your little brothers
about funding my little video tape.
- 280. I'm trying to make
powertap more international.
- 281. I'm trying to be like Billy Blanks,
- 282. But double the money and half the Blank.
- 283. That's a good idea.
- 284. Maybe I will, maybe I will. But,
first, I got to get that private lesson.
- 285. Okay. Call me, girl.
- 286. I'll call you. I'll
be your private dancer.
- 287. Must be Saturday. Why is that?
- 288. Because here come
Norbit, right on schedule.
- 289. Almost set your watch to him.
- 290. Hey, Pope Sweet Jesus
and Lord Have Mercy.
- 291. How you guys doing, fellows?
- 292. Business is good.
- 293. Business is good. It's
almost like the good old days.
- 294. Yes, indeedy.
- 295. What do you mean, "the good old days"?
- 296. The good old days, man, back
when we was pimping, Norbit.
- 297. You know.
- 298. You guys used to pimp? "Used to"?
- 299. That's a violation. Still pimping.
Once a pimp, always a pimp.
- 300. Always. Forever. Boss player.
- 301. Rasputia sent me down
here to get the usual.
- 302. You guys are open, right?
- 303. We always open. Go on and
take yourself in there, Norbit.
- 304. We'll stack that up for you.
- 305. Moniqua! Yes, Daddy.
- 306. Can you get King Kong three
large buckets, extra sauce?
- 307. Please don't trim the fat. Yes, Daddy.
- 308. Please don't trim that
fat. She will kill me.
- 309. Norbit, while I got your attention,
- 310. Can I interest you in some
new shoes, maybe a haircut?
- 311. How about a bath or a sink?
- 312. Hey, don't tell me you guys
bought the bath store, too?
- 313. It's a perfect fit, man. We
used to sell bitches to johns.
- 314. Now we selling johns to bitches.
- 315. Beds, bitches, and beyond!
Sound like money to me.
- 316. No, thanks, guys.
- 317. I got to go do a puppet show
for the kids at the orphanage.
- 318. At the orphanage?
- 319. That's a nice thing you do for
them little kids over there.
- 320. Why don't you take
these little tater puffs
- 321. Over there to them little children?
- 322. Oh, that's great, guys. That's sweet.
- 323. Wait, my puppets! I forgot my puppets!
- 324. I got to go. I got to go, guys.
- 325. Where's his puppets?
He ain't got no puppets.
- 326. What's Rasputia doing home so early?
- 327. 'Sputia?
- 328. Oh, yeah, girl.
- 329. Come on, girl, that's sweet chocolate!
- 330. Okay, you in trouble, now. You
in trouble. You in trouble, now.
- 331. I'm Willy Wonka. Get
up on that Oompa Loompa.
- 332. That's sweet. Oh, yeah.
Take all that, girl.
- 333. Take it with your big old self, girl.
You ain't never had it like this.
- 334. You ain't never had it like this!
- 335. Hell, yeah. Come on, we
gonna do pig in a blanket.
- 336. Come on, pig in a blanket.
- 337. Now squeal. Squeal!
Squeal! Oink, oink, oink!
- 338. Take it from the back.
- 339. Damn, I feel like Willy Wonka, all
this sweet chocolate up in this...
- 340. Hey. How you doing, man?
What's good with you, brother?
- 341. How's it going, man? How you doing?
- 342. I'm Bustamove Perkin. How you doing?
- 343. Man, your wife was
just talking about you.
- 344. Man, she love you.
- 345. You're Rasputia's tap dance teacher.
Man, actually, I'm her powertap guru.
- 346. I was just here giving
her a little tap lesson.
- 347. But you're naked.
- 348. That's just so she could
see the various muscle groups
- 349. As I go through the various routines.
- 350. You see that there? You can't
see that with a turtleneck.
- 351. And you have an...
- 352. Oh, man, I'm just real
passionate about dance.
- 353. You can say the word "dance"
and he just jump up. Dance!
- 354. See that? See that there?
- 355. 'Sputia?
- 356. Norbit, Buster's a guest in our home.
- 357. How dare you insinuate
something like that?
- 358. Yeah, Orbit!
- 359. How dare you insinuate
something such like that!
- 360. You know, I am actually offended by
your accusization, you understand?
- 361. And rather than sit here and have a
belligerent confrontation with you,
- 362. 'Cause I am a Godfearing man,
- 363. I'm'a do like Jesus H. Christ
would do in a situation such as such
- 364. And I'm gonna turn the other cheek.
- 365. Amen.
- 366. You happy now?
- 367. Rasputia, you cheated on me!
- 368. Look, I told your ass
ain't nothing happened,
- 369. And the next time you
say it happened again,
- 370. I'm gonna knock your
teeth out your mouth.
- 371. Rasputia, we took
vows. I'm your husband.
- 372. Rasputia, we took vows,
and you cheated on me!
- 373. It never happened!
- 374. Yes, it did!
- 375. And that makes you the queen of whores!
- 376. Hey, Norbit!
- 377. Run for your lives!
- 378. Bastard! Come here!
- 379. Oh, sweet Moses! Oh, my God!
- 380. Come here! Come here! Come here to me!
- 381. No! Leave me alone!
- 382. You ain't nothing but a goddamn coward!
- 383. Saddle tramp!
- 384. That's what your stupid black ass get!
- 385. I hope you broke your ass!
- 386. Since you feel like running, Norbit,
- 387. Why don't you run your
ass down to the Rib Shak
- 388. And get me a short stack of ribs?
- 389. And get me a short stack of ribs?
- 390. Extra hot sauce.
- 391. All this setting you
straight done got me famished.
- 392. I'm Little Red Riding Goose,
- 393. Walking through the forest,
minding my own business,
- 394. When all at once...
- 395. Hello.
- 396. Who are you? I'm the big,
bad pig of the forest.
- 397. My, what big eyes you have, Pig.
- 398. The better to see you with, Goose.
- 399. And my, what a big nose you have, Pig.
- 400. The better to smell them scrumptious
goodies you got in your basket.
- 401. Hey, let me take a look in there.
- 402. Oh, no, you don't. You're
gonna try to steal my food.
- 403. No, I won't steal your food.
- 404. Don't let that pig
push you around, Goose.
- 405. Yeah, I'm tired of
you pushing me around.
- 406. Look, I'm tired of playing
with your ass, bitch.
- 407. I know you got ribs in that basket.
- 408. You better give them up smooth
- 409. Or I'm gonna break my
hoof off in your goose ass.
- 410. Oh, really? Well, why don't you
get up off of your lazy behind
- 411. And go down to the Rib
Shak and get your own ribs?
- 412. Or better still, why
don't you just call Buster
- 413. And tell him to come
over and powertap you,
- 414. Because in addition to
being the pig of the forest,
- 415. You're also a saddle
tramp, whore, bitch pig...
- 416. Norbit! What you doing? This
supposed to be a children's show.
- 417. This remind me of Chinese
snuff film I once costar in.
- 418. I'm sorry. I got a little carried away.
- 419. Wow, Norbit, that was some puppet show.
- 420. Oh, come on. You don't remember me?
- 421. Kate. Kate. Come here!
- 422. Kate! Kate! Oh, God! I
can't believe it! Kate!
- 423. Well, can I have a hug?
- 424. Norbit.
- 425. It just like old times.
- 426. Maybe you two go take poop together.
- 427. This place has not changed at all.
- 428. Oh, yeah. Some of this furniture's
even come back in style.
- 429. So, how long are you
gonna be visiting for?
- 430. No, I'm not visiting. I'm moving back.
- 431. Really? Wow.
- 432. I sold my clothing business in Atlanta,
- 433. And I'm going to use the
money to buy the orphanage.
- 434. What?
- 435. Mr. Wong's getting older.
He wants to go whallng, so...
- 436. You know, it's always been my dream
to come back here and take over.
- 437. That's great.
- 438. Norbit, look.
- 439. That's the tree we got married under.
- 440. You know, I've still got my ring.
- 441. I ate mine.
- 442. I missed you so much when you left.
- 443. I missed you, too.
- 444. That's my car.
- 445. We didn't really get a
chance to catch up much.
- 446. I'll be back in town on
Tuesday. You wanna have lunch?
- 447. Yeah, I would love to
have lunch on Tuesday.
- 448. I love lunch. Okay.
- 449. Lunch, yes. For sure.
I love lunch. Tuesday.
- 450. I'll see you Tuesday.
- 451. I'll see you on Tuesday.
We'll have lunch on Tuesday.
- 452. Tuesday.
- 453. Tuesday. Tuesday.
- 454. Tuesday, Tuesday,
Tuesday, Tuesday, Tuesday.
- 455. Tuesday, Tuesday, Tuesday, Tuesday,
Tuesday, Tuesday, Tuesday...
- 456. Tuesday, Tuesday, Tuesday,
Tuesday, Tuesday, Tuesday...
- 457. Tuesday, Tuesday, Tuesday, Tuesday.
- 458. Tuesday, Tuesday...
- 459. Say "Tuesday" again and you
ain't gonna see Wednesday!
- 460. I got it. I'll get it. Tuesday.
- 461. Tuesday, Tuesday, Tuesday.
- 462. Buster. How you doing?
You look great. Hey.
- 463. Oh, thank you, man. Good
to see you. Good to see you.
- 464. Thank you. I thought you
were gonna be at work.
- 465. Yeah, I'm on my way out now.
- 466. But hey, look, there's cold
beer in the refrigerator
- 467. And there's fresh sheets on the
bed. Go have a great dance lesson.
- 468. All right. All right.
- 469. Powertap.
- 470. Very good, very good.
- 471. Tuesday.
- 472. What's wrong with your boy?
He real cool all of a sudden.
- 473. Yeah, I don't know what the hell got
into him, but I know I got dance fever.
- 474. Ready for a little powertap, huh?
- 475. Lord, give me strength.
- 476. Hey, Sam, happy Tuesday.
- 477. Norbit.
- 478. Norbit.
- 479. Hey, Kate. Hi. Come
on, I got us a table.
- 480. Great. I've been looking
forward to this all week.
- 481. Good.
- 482. Hey.
- 483. Hey. Who's he?
- 484. Norbit, this is my fiancй, Deion Hughes.
- 485. How you doing, my man?
Sit, sit, sit, sit, sit.
- 486. This is your fiancй? Yes, sir.
- 487. I was just telling Deion that you and
I were buddy partners at the orphanage.
- 488. Now she and I are buddy partners.
- 489. Shame on you, man, letting a
girl go like this. I feel for you.
- 490. And so Deion's got all this
experience in real estate,
- 491. So he's going to help me buy the
orphanage, Norbit. It's so exciting!
- 492. No, wait, wait. No, no.
Slow down, slow down.
- 493. I mean, you know, we're just
out here just scouting it out.
- 494. All right? This is
her nest egg, you know.
- 495. I don't want her making
any hasty decisions
- 496. That she might regret later, you know?
- 497. She worked too hard for this
money, man, you know what I mean?
- 498. Deion, you take such
good care of me, baby.
- 499. It's my job. Stop it.
- 500. Okay?
- 501. Don't you just love Tuesdays?
- 502. Lloyd, just tell me why
it has to hurt so GD much.
- 503. What's the matter, boy?
- 504. You sensing an earthquake or some
other sort of natural disaster?
- 505. That's just my...
- 506. My wife.
- 507. A man needs his own space.
- 508. Finally! For the love of Cain.
- 509. Moses!
- 510. I'll see you suckers
tomorrow at the picnic!
- 511. Damn it, Norbit! How many
times I got to tell you,
- 512. Don't be messing with my car seat!
- 513. Nobody touched your old, stupid seat.
- 514. Then how come it's all
mushed up like this, then?
- 515. Well, you know, Rasputia,
you've been eating so much lately
- 516. There's a very strong possibility
that... The car is shrinking.
- 517. Might be shrinking. The
car is being smaller.
- 518. Yeah, you might be right. Been raining
a lot lately. All this moist weather.
- 519. Oh, yeah? That'll make it
shrink. This weather's so moist.
- 520. How you doing?
- 521. Don't cha wish your
girlfriend was hot like me
- 522. Don't cha wish your
girlfriend was a freak like me
- 523. Don't cha
- 524. Look at that dog over
there, eyeballing me.
- 525. Rasputia, what are you doing?
- 526. Shut up!
- 527. Hey, slow down! You're gonna hit
him! I got you now. I got you now!
- 528. Stop it! No! I'm gonna
get you. I'm gonna get you.
- 529. Rasputia, don't! No! No! No!
- 530. I know what that sound means!
- 531. I know what that sound means!
- 532. Bark! How you doing!
- 533. Lloyd!
- 534. Enough is enough.
- 535. Now, where in the hell
do you think you're going?
- 536. Lloyd's in the hospital because of you!
- 537. Yeah, that's right. I put his
little dog ass in the hospital.
- 538. And I'd have put it in the morgue, too,
if you didn't mess with my car seat.
- 539. It threw off my driving skills.
- 540. Rasputia, you are a mean, selfish, cold,
heartless woman, and I am leaving you!
- 541. You leaving me? Yes!
- 542. Well, where the hell you
think you're going, big shot?
- 543. You ain't got no money.
You ain't got no family.
- 544. Everything is in my name,
the car, the house...
- 545. You ain't nothing and you ain't gonna
never be nothing without me, Norbit!
- 546. Norbit, you just can't leave!
Norbit, please, I'm with child!
- 547. With child?
- 548. Oh, yes, Norbit, can't you
tell? I'm getting a little belly.
- 549. And my titties is all
achy and itchylike.
- 550. Oh, Norbit, we gonna be a family.
- 551. Oh, Norbit, come hug me, Daddy, please.
- 552. Please, Norbit.
- 553. I understand, little pony.
- 554. I know your pain.
- 555. Oh, yes, I know.
- 556. Excuse me, snow bunny.
- 557. I don't come in your jurisdiction,
throwing town picnics.
- 558. Yet here you is all up
in mines, pimping hos.
- 559. It's just a kissing booth.
- 560. Call it what you will,
but Pope Sweet Jesus
- 561. Is taking half.
- 562. You work for me now, ho.
- 563. Sure.
- 564. Let me taste the goods.
- 565. Put it on me.
- 566. Greasy. Greasy.
- 567. We back in business.
- 568. I wanna be a ho. How do I apply?
- 569. Please, Lord Jesus, help me! Look,
look, tickets! Hey, tickets, tickets.
- 570. Let me go! Let me go!
Line up with your buddy.
- 571. Line up with your buddy.
- 572. You got one, sweetie.
Can we go on the jumper?
- 573. Yeah, yeah, you go.
- 574. Baby, you know I love
you. I love these kids.
- 575. It's just that I don't
think buying an orphanage
- 576. Is the right move financially
right now. That's all.
- 577. Hey, this is not a
financial decision, Deion.
- 578. I thought you understood that,
baby. No. No, I do. I do, baby.
- 579. But this the call I was telling you...
The business call, it's very important.
- 580. Let's talk about it when I
get back to the house, okay?
- 581. You're not going to stay?
- 582. No, very important. Here.
- 583. Hello? It's never a bad time for you.
- 584. Stop it! Stop!
- 585. Norbit!
- 586. Hey. Hi.
- 587. Hey.
- 588. I didn't know you were
gonna be here. Oh, yeah.
- 589. Hey, you know, I just saw Deion leaving.
- 590. He had some business to take care of.
- 591. So, who are you here with?
- 592. My wife.
- 593. Norbit, I didn't know
you were married. Yeah.
- 594. Well, that's wonderful.
Really. Thank you so much.
- 595. So, where is she?
- 596. Right over there in the print outfit.
- 597. The one talking to
the girl by the bench?
- 598. No, the one sucking the
jelly out of them donuts.
- 599. Oh, yeah. She's pretty.
- 600. That's cherry. Is that
cherry or strawberry?
- 601. What are my kids doing? Peter! Theo!
- 602. I don't want you bothering anyone.
- 603. I'm so sorry, Mrs. Rice.
- 604. Mrs. Rice? My name
ain't no damn Mrs. Rice.
- 605. Oh, I just thought 'cause
you're married to Norbit...
- 606. Who the hell are you?
- 607. Kate, this is my wife,
- 608. And, Rasputia, this is Kate.
- 609. Nice to meet you. Hello.
- 610. Kate's an old friend of
mine from the orphanage.
- 611. Latimore, as in Latimore Construction?
- 612. Yes, that's right, as
in Latimore Construction.
- 613. That's right. Why?
- 614. Well, just that this is perfect,
- 615. 'Cause I was going to come see
you guys about a renovation of...
- 616. I ain't come out here for that.
- 617. I'm out here to enjoy these festivities,
not to be talking no business.
- 618. You wanna talk business,
my brother is Big Black Jack
- 619. Over there by the BB guns.
- 620. Go over there and talk to him.
I ain't got no time for this.
- 621. Oh, sure, okay.
- 622. Well, go on, get.
- 623. Okay. Okay.
- 624. Come here. What, Rasputia?
- 625. You thinking about creeping, ain't you?
- 626. We're just friends.
- 627. What'd I tell you about having friends?
- 628. Go over there and get
me another wine cooler.
- 629. It's hot as hell out here.
Don't you see I'm sweltering?
- 630. Rasputia, you can't drink
wine. Why the hell not?
- 631. You're with child. With
child? I ain't with no...
- 632. Oh, that was... I had
gas. I still got it.
- 633. There's your child. Now, go
get me something to drink.
- 634. Twins!
- 635. Hey! You come back here!
- 636. Oh, my God! Move your fat ass, boy.
- 637. Look, you got one!
- 638. Get him. Get him, Big Black.
- 639. Are you Big Black Jack?
- 640. What it look like?
- 641. Oh, well.
- 642. Me and my fiancй are
buying the Golden Wonton...
- 643. Wong's place? He's selling it to you?
- 644. Yeah. Why is that surprising?
- 645. Miss Thomas, Miss Thomas, let's
go. They're starting the music.
- 646. Oh, great! Come on. Let's go.
- 647. Can we finish this up later?
Apparently I have to go dance now.
- 648. All right, baby. You go dance now.
- 649. The orphanage is in play.
- 650. Y'all better give me
my hat. Give me the hat!
- 651. Here, take her hat.
- 652. You think I won't come up in
here? I'm gonna come up in here.
- 653. You think I'm playing?
- 654. Give me the hat right now, or
I'm gonna tear your leg off.
- 655. Hey, Norbit, come on!
- 656. Oh, no. No, I can't.
Rasputia's waiting for me.
- 657. Come on, dance with us.
No, really, I shouldn't...
- 658. Don't think I won't kill a child. I'll
kill a child in front of everybody.
- 659. Little street urchins.
- 660. Okay. That's it. Now it's
time to bring the pain.
- 661. Dance, Norbit, dance! Come on!
- 662. My hat!
- 663. It's raining little white women.
- 664. My prayers have been answered!
- 665. She'd better move, 'cause
my prayer is for a Cadillac.
- 666. You little bastards.
- 667. Where the hell is Norbit
with that wine cooler?
- 668. I'm thirsty as hell.
- 669. Oh, hell, no.
- 670. Oh, he's lost his mind.
- 671. Bitch, that's my wine cooler!
- 672. It's my birthday! It's my birthday!
- 673. It's your birthday? You
think it's your birthday, huh?
- 674. Norbit's got moves, everybody! Yeah!
- 675. You got him loose, don't
you, you little skinny bitch?
- 676. I see what you trying to do. I
see just what you trying to do.
- 677. Go, Norbit! Go, Norbit! Go,
Norbit! Come on, everybody!
- 678. Go, Norbit!
- 679. Go, Norbit! Go, Norbit! Go, Norbit!
- 680. Go, Norbit! Go, Norbit!
- 681. Go, Norbit! Go, Norbit! Go...
- 682. Norbit!
- 683. Crooked employees? Unlicensed doctors?
- 684. Lipstick on your husband's collar?
- 685. Find out who you're really deallng with.
- 686. Send $29.95 to
Background Checks by Mail,
- 687. P.O. Box 119, Locust Falls.
- 688. Hey, buddy partner.
- 689. Hi, Kate. Hi, nice to
see you. How you doing?
- 690. I'm good, but how
about you and your head?
- 691. Oh, I'm doing better.
- 692. The doctor said if it weren't for my
hard Afro, it could have killed me.
- 693. Are you sure you're okay,
Norbit? That sounds kind of fast.
- 694. Oh, well, they're doing some tests.
They're kind of monitoring me.
- 695. Well, I don't know about this
stuff, but 110 beats per minute,
- 696. That's kind of high. 120...
- 697. Oh, my goodness, 130!
- 698. Yeah, maybe the machine's broke.
I'm just gonna take these off.
- 699. You Deion Hughes?
- 700. Who's asking?
- 701. We the Latimores.
- 702. Yeah. Latimore Construction.
- 703. And we run this town.
- 704. Your woman was telling us how y'all
was planning on buying the orphanage.
- 705. Kate has her plans and I have mine.
- 706. Well, it looks like the only
plans you got, my man, is leaving.
- 707. I ain't sticking around
raising no damn orphans.
- 708. I got kids of my own I
ain't even bringing up.
- 709. So, you was just hustling her?
- 710. Break it to her gentle
for me, would you? I'm out!
- 711. Hold up, player. I think
you missing the flow here.
- 712. That orphanage she buying,
that's a huge property,
- 713. Outside of town, zoned commercial.
- 714. Even got a liquor license.
- 715. Lnteresting.
- 716. It's a perfect place for a titty bar.
- 717. Did you say "titty bar"? Titties.
- 718. We got it all worked out.
- 719. We gonna call it Nipplopolis.
- 720. Nipplopolis.
- 721. Shit got a ring to it, don't it?
- 722. We talking about overpriced,
- 723. And fake tig old bitties in abundance.
- 724. Ain't gonna be nothing but taxfree,
- 725. Underthetable, pure
cash money. Big time!
- 726. That's right.
- 727. All you got to do is swing us
the deal and we make you partner.
- 728. And what about Kate?
- 729. If you marry her, it's
as much yours as hers.
- 730. Norbit, I really want you to
be a part of the orphanage.
- 731. The kids are crazy about you.
- 732. They're good kids. Yeah.
- 733. You know, I'm gonna take them bike
riding tomorrow, down by the lake.
- 734. Why don't you come?
- 735. I don't know if I could
go for a bike ride.
- 736. I never... I didn't
really know how, the...
- 737. I can't ride a bike still.
- 738. You never learned? What?
- 739. Well, you left, you know,
- 740. And there was nobody there to teach me.
- 741. And Wong don't ride.
- 742. Okay, we'll do something
else. The water park.
- 743. The kids have been begging
me to take them there.
- 744. Oh, I don't know about the water park.
- 745. Come on, it's a Saturday.
You don't have to work.
- 746. Yeah, I know, but it's
the park and it's watery,
- 747. And there's a potential hell to
pay if I were to be there maybe...
- 748. Hey, what are you doing
with those things, Kate?
- 749. Well, I'm just going to have
to shock you till you say yes.
- 750. Hey, come on, Kate.
Don't play with those.
- 751. Those things are plugged
in. It's hot. Clear.
- 752. No, no clear. No clear.
Stop, Kate. Stop, Kate.
- 753. Come on. Yes.
- 754. Yes, yes, yes. Yes, yes,
yes, yes! Okay, stop. Nurse!
- 755. Oh, my God, Deion. This is beautiful.
I didn't even know you could cook.
- 756. I just wanted to do something special
for you, you know, from the heart.
- 757. Well, I am feeling it.
- 758. Let's do it. Let's get married,
right away. I don't wanna wait.
- 759. Deion. Church is free on Saturday.
- 760. You're serious?
- 761. Baby, we belong together. Yeah.
- 762. I want to. Saturday. Yeah. Yes!
- 763. Thank you. Oh, no, thank you.
- 764. Norbit!
- 765. Hi. Hey. Good morning, Rasputia.
- 766. Good morning. How are you this morning?
- 767. Where the hell you going?
- 768. Nowhere special. I was
just gonna go out to...
- 769. I was just going over to
Raging Waters. Raging Waters?
- 770. Yes. It's this thing I
got roped into, darling.
- 771. You know, I was at this orphanage
when I was raised, and...
- 772. And the people from the orphanage
- 773. And now they're taking other
orphans to Raging Waters
- 774. So they asked me to come and
give back to the community,
- 775. So I'm trying to, you know, do my part.
- 776. Little Miss Skinny Bitch gonna be there?
- 777. You mean Miss Ling Ling?
- 778. You know damn well I ain't
talking about no Miss Ling Ling.
- 779. I'm talking about Miss
Thing Thing from that picnic.
- 780. Miss Thing Thing from the picnic?
- 781. Who are you talking about,
sweetheart? I don't even...
- 782. Wait, I think I remember now. A
girl, she had the foreign name.
- 783. Something Russian. Kate, bitch!
- 784. Kate! Of course it's Kate. Yes, I
don't know if Kate's gonna be there.
- 785. I hadn't even thought about it.
It didn't even cross my mind.
- 786. I wonder, will Kate be
there? Damn good question.
- 787. Well, I'm going.
- 788. No!
- 789. You don't like water
parks, Rasputia. No.
- 790. You don't like water
parks, Rasputia. No.
- 791. Who don't like water parks? I love
them. They're just like amusement parks,
- 792. Except you ain't got to get off
the ride to go to the bathroom.
- 793. How you doing?
- 794. Great.
- 795. There you go. Have fun.
- 796. There you go, Brian.
Nick, there's one for you.
- 797. All right, kids, everybody please
be nice to Mrs. Latimore, okay?
- 798. Okay. Okay.
- 799. Kate, I hope you don't mind.
I asked Rasputia to join us.
- 800. Of course not. I'm really
glad you could come.
- 801. Well, are we gonna stand around
here all day or we gonna go inside?
- 802. Excuse me.
- 803. Excuse me, ma'am.
- 804. What?
- 805. Are you wearing bottoms?
- 806. Of course I'm wearing bottoms!
- 807. Okay. Come on in.
- 808. How dare you?
- 809. Oh, hell, no.
- 810. How you doing!
- 811. This ain't like no real beach,
- 812. 'Cause on a real beach you got
people walking around with ice chests
- 813. And you can get all kinds of treats
like sandwiches and potato chips
- 814. And Mentos and Skittles and
all sorts of delectables.
- 815. You can't get shit here!
- 816. Well, you know, there's
a concession stand.
- 817. You going?
- 818. No, I already ate.
- 819. Well, you could have fooled me.
- 820. I'm sorry?
- 821. I'm just trying to say you
too damn skinny. Look at you.
- 822. See, most men like a woman that
got a little... Or a little...
- 823. You ain't got nothing.
You just skin and bones,
- 824. Just sitting in that
chair all bones and skin.
- 825. I feel sorry for you.
- 826. Well, I just feel that we're all made
exactly the way we're supposed to be.
- 827. Oh, no. Hell, no. I'm a Christian,
- 828. And you ain't gonna sit there and
blame God for how you look, okay?
- 829. You the one that pushed that plate away.
- 830. My Norbit is always telling
me there's two kinds of women,
- 831. Big old good ones and good old big ones.
- 832. Really?
- 833. That's right. And, sister, let me
tell you, just between the two of us,
- 834. I can't keep Norbit off me.
- 835. He is the biggest freak
you ever wanna meet
- 836. And he be blowing my back out,
- 837. Trying to put me through
the headboard every night.
- 838. I'm thinking about going on
a little diet or something
- 839. So I can get all
emaciatedlooking like you,
- 840. Then he'll think I look disgusting
- 841. And I can get a rest or some
sleep for a little while,
- 842. Because he want it all the time.
Just boom, bam, boom, boom, boom.
- 843. But I ain't mad at him, hey.
- 844. I'm gonna go on a diet
for sure, next week.
- 845. Right now I'm gonna get me a
lamb kabob and a wine cooler.
- 846. How you doing? Where is
that wine cooler section?
- 847. Miss Thomas, we're all going
off the Leap of Doom. Come on.
- 848. Slowly. Slowly.
Someone's gonna fall down.
- 849. You're gonna break your head
in half in a second. Slow down!
- 850. Wait for me!
- 851. I tell you, it sure is tiring chasing these
kids all around the water park, isn't it?
- 852. Especially for us skinny folk.
- 853. What?
- 854. Never mind.
- 855. So, Norbit, I have some news.
- 856. Deion and I decided
to move up the wedding.
- 857. What wedding?
- 858. Our wedding.
- 859. We're going to get married on Saturday.
- 860. You're getting married on Saturday?
- 861. Yeah, we just figured,
"Why wait?" You know?
- 862. Well... Congratulations, then.
- 863. Thanks.
- 864. Yeah. I'm really happy.
- 865. Oh, so am l. It's wonderful.
- 866. So, there it is, the Leap of Doom.
- 867. Yeah, go and have fun. I'll
wait for you at the bottom.
- 868. You go have some fun.
- 869. Okay. Okay.
- 870. Okay, kids, one at a time.
- 871. I guess this is me.
- 872. What are you looking at, Norbit?
- 873. I was just watching the... Some kids.
They're about to come down the slide.
- 874. I wanted to watch the
kids come down safely.
- 875. Kids, huh? Yeah.
- 876. So, you wanna watch a
bitch come down a slide?
- 877. Well, I'm gonna show you how
a bitch come down a slide.
- 878. Oh, no...
- 879. Excuse me, ma'am? We have
a 300pound weight limit.
- 880. I don't weigh no damn 300 pounds.
I weigh 165. How you doing?
- 881. That was awesome.
- 882. What's that?
- 883. It's Rasputia.
- 884. I'm gonna show you how
a bitch go down a slide.
- 885. I'm sliding, bitches!
- 886. Mary, Mother of God.
- 887. Slow down! Stop! Stop!
- 888. How you doing?
- 889. Why does she have to go
and get married, Lloyd?
- 890. Things were going so well.
- 891. There it is.
- 892. Hey. Sorry about the concussion.
- 893. It's okay. And the whiplash.
- 894. It's okay. And the bruised stomach.
- 895. And the blood clot.
- 896. Nothing.
- 897. You know damn well that's your baby.
- 898. You know it's yours. Got
the same chin. The same lip.
- 899. That baby got the same head
as you and the same eye...
- 900. Go take the test. Take the test.
- 901. You want to hear the test results?
- 902. In the case of the little baby...
- 903. Well, the test says that is your baby.
- 904. How you doing?
- 905. Latimore Construction, Norbit speaking.
- 906. Hey, Norbit, it's Kate.
- 907. Is there any way you can
meet me in town right now?
- 908. Yeah, sure.
- 909. Great. I'm at McCormick's.
- 910. Okay. Fine.
- 911. Rasputia, I'm just loaded up
with paperwork up to my ear.
- 912. I was wondering, could you run
these permits downtown for me?
- 913. Now you tell me what
in the hell I look like,
- 914. Running some goddamn permits
down to City Hall for your ass.
- 915. You do it.
- 916. You do it.
- 917. Okay.
- 918. What's the surprise?
No, I'm not telling you.
- 919. Tell me. Hey, no, what are you doing?
- 920. Not till the last second. What? What?
- 921. You ready? Yeah, what is it?
- 922. I know you don't think I'm
gonna get on that thing.
- 923. I think you're gonna get
on that. Hey, no way. Hey.
- 924. Come on! Look where you
wanna go. You're doing great.
- 925. You got it? You got it? You got it?
- 926. Watch out for the fence!
- 927. And the mailbox.
- 928. Rasputia, the painters from the
Crestview site got food poisoning.
- 929. There's vomit everywhere!
- 930. You know damn well you clean
up all the vomit. You do it!
- 931. I don't feel safe.
Yeah! You're doing great!
- 932. Yeah.
- 933. The Portosans at Drummond's tipped over!
- 934. Well, go clean the shit up!
- 935. Rasputia?
- 936. You do it!
- 937. I got it! Go!
- 938. I'm getting it! I'm doing it!
- 939. You're doing it! Yeah, but slow down!
- 940. How? With the brakes! The brakes!
- 941. Oh, no. Are you okay?
- 942. Yeah. Actually, that was kind of fun.
- 943. Come on. Okay, help me.
- 944. Okay? Yeah, yeah.
- 945. So, I'm going to Giovanni's tonight
to choose the food for the reception.
- 946. You wanna come? Help me decide?
- 947. What about Deion?
- 948. I just don't trust him with food.
- 949. You know, he made dinner
for us the other night.
- 950. It tasted like cheap takeout.
- 951. Well, I'll go. Good.
- 952. Well, I just have to go get my dress,
and then we can meet, say, at 7:00?
- 953. Okay, that's great.
- 954. Perfect, Norbit. Okay, see you at 7:00.
- 955. Norbit!
- 956. All right. Yeah, Norby.
- 957. 7:00, don't be late.
- 958. You guys are all pervs.
- 959. I love it.
- 960. What's wrong?
- 961. Are you sure we're not rushing things?
- 962. I know we're not. I know we're
not. I couldn't be happier.
- 963. Norbit, that's a date.
- 964. No, it's not. She just wants someone...
- 965. Are you paying for this
encounter this evening?
- 966. Of course not!
- 967. Then that's a date. Don't be
trying to tell a pimp his game.
- 968. Come on, baby.
- 969. Thank you. Carmen, honey!
- 970. All right.
- 971. Well, who are you getting all fine for?
- 972. Hello, Rasputia. Well, that's nice.
- 973. Oh, yeah, right. Why you
trying to look all extra today?
- 974. Oh, I'm just, you know, being a girl.
- 975. My fiancй likes it when
I take care of myself.
- 976. Look to me like that
fish already in his net.
- 977. You look like you fixing
to catch you a new fish.
- 978. What? No. God. Don't be silly.
- 979. You're married. You're here.
- 980. I don't do this for my husband.
- 981. Girl, I do this because I
have a reputation to uphold.
- 982. Everybody in this town know that
Rasputia Latimore is fine. Ain't I fine?
- 983. You fine, girl! You are fine. Sister!
- 984. Everybody knows.
- 985. But even a delicate flower like me
need a little water from time to time.
- 986. Or a little lye in her kitchen to
help straighten out them petals.
- 987. How you doing?
- 988. Rasputia.
- 989. Helga waiting on you,
girl, to do your bikini wax.
- 990. Here I come, girl.
- 991. I got to go, girl. Every now
and then I got to mow the lawn.
- 992. You just make sure all that
sprucing up is for your fiancй.
- 993. Helga, here I come, girl.
It's a full moon, too.
- 994. Here we go, dear.
- 995. I was looking for
Norbit's police whistle.
- 996. Go fish.
- 997. What's up?
- 998. Everything on schedule with the wedding?
- 999. I got my own problems,
but I'll handle it.
- 1000. What's this situation
you're talking about?
- 1001. The liquor license on the orphanage.
- 1002. It won't roll over when
the property changes hands,
- 1003. Not without one of these
transfer requests upfront.
- 1004. Yeah, and getting a new
license could take years.
- 1005. Yeah, we'd be out of business
before we get started.
- 1006. You think you can get Kate to sign that?
- 1007. Hell, no. She's planning
on closing the restaurant.
- 1008. It'd raise too many suspicions.
- 1009. All right, smartass,
then what we gonna do now?
- 1010. Yeah. Yeah.
- 1011. Norbit.
- 1012. Where you going, Norbit?
Sit your punk ass down.
- 1013. Guys, I told Rasputia the
toilet needed to be reinforced
- 1014. And she said that I
should take care of it,
- 1015. So I'm gonna go take care of that.
- 1016. Forget that.
- 1017. I can't. No, guys, it's an
accident waiting to happen.
- 1018. I have to deal with
it. I said forget that.
- 1019. We need you to get these
papers signed tonight.
- 1020. Oh, no. I can't do it tonight, guys.
- 1021. There's an accident waiting to
happen. I have to deal with this...
- 1022. Norbit, if you don't get
these papers signed tonight,
- 1023. We can't start the
remodel on the orphanage.
- 1024. That's right, punk ass.
- 1025. Bullshit. I'm going for mine
tonight. I got things to do!
- 1026. Norbit, you better find that Kate Thomas
- 1027. And get her to sign.
- 1028. Yeah.
- 1029. Kate Thomas?
- 1030. You want me to get these
papers to Kate Thomas?
- 1031. Yeah.
- 1032. Okay, that's more important.
- 1033. I'll take care of this for you
guys. I'll get these to Kate Thomas.
- 1034. That's what I told you to
do. Get your punk ass up.
- 1035. Okay, I'm gonna go take these to Kate
- 1036. And take my punk ass to
Kate Thomas right now.
- 1037. Excuse me, pardon me. Let me
get through here. Thank you.
- 1038. Excuse me. Going through. Hi. Bitch ass.
- 1039. Yes, I am a bitch ass.
Excuse me. Kate Thomas.
- 1040. Hey, sorry I'm late.
- 1041. Man, it's time for a pimpallcious
makeover. Let's do this.
- 1042. All right. But nothing too flashy
now. I wanna be flashy, but not...
- 1043. Class. I don't want no...
- 1044. Now, that's pimping.
- 1045. All right, hair's bigger.
- 1046. Okay. Well, I guess this is it,
guys. Thanks a lot for all your help.
- 1047. Thanks for making me fly.
- 1048. You fly like a flock of birds, baby.
- 1049. You look good. Thanks, guys.
- 1050. Handle this business for us, brother.
I'm gonna handle it. Gonna handle it.
- 1051. Do the walk, Norbit. I got you.
- 1052. Yeah. Norbit!
- 1053. Wow, Norbit!
- 1054. I just picked these on
the side of the road,
- 1055. 'Cause this is just
a casual gettogether.
- 1056. Sure. And you put the wires up the
stems, too. That's a nice touch.
- 1057. Norbit! Hey, Sam.
- 1058. You dressed to kill, huh?
- 1059. Katerina, you look
beautiful. Come sit, please.
- 1060. I'm making my specialty just for you.
- 1061. Hey. Did you make my favorite?
- 1062. What do you think, huh?
- 1063. I'm gonna take the flowers,
put them into water, okay?
- 1064. He's a nice man.
- 1065. Your favorite?
- 1066. I guess you and Rasputia
come here a lot, huh?
- 1067. Oh, no. We used to, but
she got banned for life
- 1068. Because Sam had an
allyoucaneat buffet once
- 1069. And she took it as a personal
challenge, and it got pretty ugly.
- 1070. I wanna make a toast.
- 1071. Oh, sure.
- 1072. To old friends.
- 1073. To old friends.
- 1074. We were buddy partners,
all right, Norbit. We were.
- 1075. I tell you, you know,
- 1076. Sometimes I think I should've
never married Rasputia.
- 1077. What do you mean, Norbit?
- 1078. I was just really young, you
know, and she latched on to me
- 1079. And kind of helped me fit in
and gave me a family, so...
- 1080. We had nobody, Norbit.
- 1081. I mean, who can blame us for
wanting to feel safe, you know?
- 1082. Yeah, safe.
- 1083. Like you and Deion?
- 1084. Yeah.
- 1085. I mean, it's different
with Deion, obviously.
- 1086. So, what have you got here?
- 1087. Those are just construction papers,
- 1088. Permits and stuff that you have to sign.
- 1089. Kate, can I ask you a personal question?
- 1090. Sure, what?
- 1091. Do you love Deion?
- 1092. Of course. Yeah.
- 1093. Otherwise, why would I
be marrying him, right?
- 1094. Right?
- 1095. Got your pizza. It is about time.
- 1096. I'm about to disappear
up in here I'm so hungry.
- 1097. Norbit out draining
a swamp or something.
- 1098. Yeah, he's definitely draining a swamp.
He's draining a swamp like he would be.
- 1099. Why you looking at me
like that? Where's Norbit?
- 1100. Draining a swamp. And why are
you looking at me like that?
- 1101. He's out there in the woods,
draining a swamp. I told you before.
- 1102. I don't know nothing.
- 1103. I don't know nothing, okay?
- 1104. He's on a date with
that fine skinny girl!
- 1105. It's pain time here!
I ain't having this!
- 1106. Oh, hell, no. And on top of that
he been messing with my seat again?
- 1107. Damn it, Norbit!
- 1108. He got me destroying my shit.
- 1109. This is it.
- 1110. It's always so beautiful in here.
- 1111. Peaceful.
- 1112. Hello, Kate, Norbit. Hey.
- 1113. Didn't know anybody was here. I
was getting ready to close up shop.
- 1114. You know, Kate, this
all happened so fast,
- 1115. I reallzed we never had
a chance to rehearse.
- 1116. Oh, yeah, that's right.
- 1117. So, come on up here.
- 1118. Let me at least show you
where you're gonna stand.
- 1119. Come on. All right.
- 1120. Rasputia. You know
you no allowed in here.
- 1121. The hell with that. Where's Norbit?
- 1122. I don't see Norbit.
Anybody is a see Norbit?
- 1123. No. He hasn't been here.
- 1124. Then who was eating a turkey ass?
- 1125. Run! Run! Run!
- 1126. At which point you'll
give your vows to Deion.
- 1127. You want to practice those?
- 1128. Well, I hadn't actually
gotten to that quite yet.
- 1129. You don't even know what
you're gonna say yet?
- 1130. Well, what would you
say, Norbit? I don't know.
- 1131. What would I say?
- 1132. Norbit!
- 1133. Don't cha wish your
girlfriend was hot like me
- 1134. Don't cha wish your
girlfriend was a freak like me
- 1135. Don't cha
- 1136. What would I say if I was saying vows?
- 1137. I guess...
- 1138. Kate,
- 1139. I think about you all day long.
- 1140. And when I'm not near you,
- 1141. All I think about is being near you.
- 1142. And when you are near me,
- 1143. I feel like I'm at peace
with the whole world.
- 1144. I know that...
- 1145. I know I'll never have
to ask God for anything
- 1146. 'Cause, as long as I
have you in my life,
- 1147. I got everything I ever wanted.
- 1148. And the only thing I
really wanna do is just
- 1149. Spend the rest of my life making
you as happy as you've made me.
- 1150. Because I love you, Kate.
- 1151. I love you.
- 1152. I don't know. Something like that.
- 1153. And after the vows you would then...
- 1154. Okay.
- 1155. Oh, my God.
- 1156. I'm sorry, I have to go.
- 1157. I'm sorry.
- 1158. Awkward. Yeah.
- 1159. Give me that crowbar. I
got some killing to do.
- 1160. Damn it!
- 1161. I'm a Christian. You got me up
in this church cursing, Norbit.
- 1162. Death do us part, huh? Okay, Norbit.
- 1163. Look like you done moved
up the goddamn schedule.
- 1164. I'm cursing again.
- 1165. Pray, bitch, pray.
- 1166. Our Father, who art in
heaven, hallowed be thy name.
- 1167. Thy kingdom come, thy will be
done on Earth as it is in heaven.
- 1168. Kate, please. Kate, please, I'm sorry.
- 1169. Kate, please, stop and talk to me.
- 1170. Please, please, Kate.
Talk to me, please.
- 1171. I can't, Norbit.
- 1172. I'm just too confused right now.
- 1173. I'm sorry. It was all my fault.
I never should have kissed you.
- 1174. No.
- 1175. I wanted you to.
- 1176. That's why I'm so confused.
- 1177. Good night.
- 1178. She wanted me to.
- 1179. Where the papers at, Norbit?
Got them for you right here.
- 1180. I'd hate to be you right now.
- 1181. Why?
- 1182. Go on in the house.
- 1183. Go on in.
- 1184. Go ahead, fool. What you waiting for?
- 1185. Get on in.
- 1186. Hello?
- 1187. Chocolate drop, I'm home.
- 1188. Lollipop?
- 1189. Mail.
- 1190. Expecting a letter, Norbit?
- 1191. You frightened me. No, I
was just looking through.
- 1192. How was your date?
- 1193. Date?
- 1194. That was no date. That was just...
- 1195. I just was over at
what'shername's wedding rehearsal.
- 1196. That's all. It wasn't a date, though.
- 1197. Oh, really?
- 1198. Lloyd. Is that you, Lloyd?
- 1199. Lloyd, what am I gonna do?
- 1200. Kill the bitch.
- 1201. Excuse me? What'd you say?
- 1202. You heard me. Rub her out.
Take her down. Lce the bitch.
- 1203. Hey. Lloyd, you're talking.
- 1204. She took my legs,
Norbit. She took my legs.
- 1205. You know what it's like
to be a dog with no legs?
- 1206. I can't raise one up to pee.
- 1207. Hell, I can't even hump no more,
Norbit. Humping was my thing.
- 1208. What is this, Norbit?
- 1209. Some kind of weird, satanic potato art?
- 1210. What's this?
- 1211. It looks like the acid that
we use down at the quarry.
- 1212. Right!
- 1213. But this is Miss Pretty
Little Thang's little face.
- 1214. And, Norbit, if you ever see her
again, if you ever talk to her again,
- 1215. If you ever so much as
think about the bitch again,
- 1216. This is what's gonna happen to her.
- 1217. How you doing?
- 1218. You get the picture, Norbit?
- 1219. Deion, I just think that
we need to take a beat.
- 1220. It's not you, it's me.
- 1221. Just if we slow down, l...
- 1222. Oh, good, you're up.
- 1223. Deion, we need to talk. Yes, we do.
- 1224. I was just at Latimore Construction,
you know, with the renovation plans,
- 1225. And I found this on Big Black's desk.
- 1226. What is it?
- 1227. It's a request to renew the
Golden Wonton's liquor license
- 1228. And put it in the Latimores' name.
- 1229. What?
- 1230. Baby, you signed it
yesterday. Look at the date.
- 1231. No. No, I didn't sign anything.
- 1232. Just some permits that
Norbit gave me, but...
- 1233. Well, did you read them?
- 1234. No. No. Great.
- 1235. I don't get it, though, Deion.
- 1236. Why would the Latimores want
me to renew the liquor license
- 1237. At the orphanage?
- 1238. Baby, people say they've been
trying to get their hands on
- 1239. That orphanage for years.
- 1240. Apparently they want to
turn it into a strip joint.
- 1241. Disgusting.
- 1242. First you gonna clean the basement,
then you gonna clean the garage,
- 1243. Then you gonna go upstairs
and clean the attic.
- 1244. We don't even have an attic.
- 1245. Well, then you build a damn attic,
then, Norbit! And then clean it!
- 1246. I'm going upstairs
to take a bubble bath.
- 1247. Bitch! You bitch!
- 1248. Finally.
- 1249. I needed this. Let me submerge this ass.
- 1250. How you doing?
- 1251. Good and hot.
- 1252. Sounds like it's raining outside.
- 1253. Oh, no.
- 1254. Kate!
- 1255. Norbit.
- 1256. Over here. Over here.
- 1257. I need to talk to you.
- 1258. Do you know what was in those
papers you had me sign last night?
- 1259. Yeah, the construction permits.
- 1260. No, that's not all.
- 1261. Norbit.
- 1262. Hey, just... Just go away,
Kate! Get out of here!
- 1263. What?
- 1264. You heard what I said!
Just get out of here! Scram!
- 1265. The Latimores are trying to take
control of the orphanage, Norbit.
- 1266. Well, why don't you go and find
somebody who gives a rat's ass,
- 1267. Because I sure as hell don't!
- 1268. You don't care? No, I don't care.
- 1269. And I don't care about
you, either! Norbit.
- 1270. The only woman I have ever,
ever loved and ever cared about
- 1271. Was my darling wife, Rasputia!
- 1272. But last night...
- 1273. Last night I was just trying
to nail you, you know, score?
- 1274. But now I reallze I
don't have to do that!
- 1275. All I need is my beautiful,
precious wife Rasputia!
- 1276. She's all the woman I need, so you
can just go on and get out of here,
- 1277. You screwy dame! Who needs you?
- 1278. Damn, Norbit.
- 1279. Did that skinny little
thing figure out your plan?
- 1280. Girl, you just don't get it,
do you? Norbit played you.
- 1281. You got her to sign
those papers, didn't you?
- 1282. Yes, darling.
- 1283. He been setting you up from that moment
- 1284. From the very first day you got here.
- 1285. How you doing?
- 1286. Don't you ever talk to me again!
- 1287. Kate.
- 1288. Damn, Norbit, you pissing
off everybody today.
- 1289. Don't you ever talk to me again!
Don't you ever talk to me again!
- 1290. Never again!
- 1291. Hey, Norbit.
- 1292. Mr. Wong, what are
you doing around here?
- 1293. I just going for a walk,
Norbit. Just going for a walk.
- 1294. I live in this neighborhood
long time. Long time.
- 1295. Soon I be moving on.
- 1296. Yes, as I look around this neighborhood,
- 1297. I reallze there no
good dry cleaners here.
- 1298. I could make killing.
- 1299. Why you got suitcase?
- 1300. I'm getting the H out of here.
I'm leaving town for good.
- 1301. What? Leaving town?
- 1302. I thought you stick around,
help Kate run orphanage.
- 1303. She's getting married to Deion tomorrow,
- 1304. So there's no reason for
me to stay around here.
- 1305. No reason?
- 1306. No, she won't even see me.
- 1307. And besides, I'll just
wind up getting hurt again.
- 1308. Norbit, you listen to me.
You very special to me.
- 1309. I love you like my own child,
like boy child, not girl child.
- 1310. Wong once have girl
child back in Shanghai.
- 1311. When she two years old,
I trade her for yak.
- 1312. That sort of thing happen
in China from time to time.
- 1313. Yak very hard to come by.
- 1314. Oh, yeah, sure. I appreciate that.
- 1315. You can't run from
your problems, Norbit.
- 1316. Black people run fast,
but problem even faster.
- 1317. That's kind of racist.
- 1318. Yes. Wong very racist. I no
like black. I no like Jew either.
- 1319. But black and Jew love
Chinese food. Go figure.
- 1320. Always remember two things, Norbit.
- 1321. One, even though you're very ugly,
- 1322. You're very strong inside, like warrior.
- 1323. And two, mail come late on Friday.
- 1324. Wong Dry Cleaning.
- 1325. It could have been huge.
- 1326. You don't even have to clean
nothing, you just spray with starch.
- 1327. Mr...
- 1328. I gotta warn Kate.
- 1329. Hello?
- 1330. Hello, Kate. Kate, it's
Norbit. I have to talk to you.
- 1331. Please don't call me anymore.
No, Kate, it's very important.
- 1332. Kate?
- 1333. Going somewhere, Norbit?
- 1334. No, I was... No.
- 1335. What did I tell you
about leaving this house?
- 1336. I was just going to get some fresh air.
- 1337. Boy, you ain't going nowhere
till after that wedding's done.
- 1338. We got too much riding on that.
- 1339. What do you have riding on the wedding?
- 1340. Soon as your little friend says, "I do,"
- 1341. Deion and us is gonna turn
the orphanage into a titty bar.
- 1342. But what about the little orphans?
- 1343. Hell, they can come too,
if they pay the cover.
- 1344. John the Baptist, stop their evil plan.
- 1345. Get your ass down in the basement.
- 1346. Get down there!
- 1347. It's a madhouse! A madhouse!
- 1348. Come on, Rasputia! We
gonna be late. Yeah.
- 1349. I know y'all better stop rushing me.
- 1350. Beauty takes time.
This don't just happen.
- 1351. Oh, no.
- 1352. You get out the car.
- 1353. You gonna stay here and make
sure Norbit don't go no place.
- 1354. You gonna stay here and make
sure Norbit don't go no place.
- 1355. What? Why I gotta stay?
- 1356. Because everybody know you the smartest.
- 1357. Three minutes to show time.
Not too late to chicken out.
- 1358. No, I'm ready.
- 1359. Okay. You look beautiful.
- 1360. POWER.
- 1361. T to the A to the motherstanking
P. Powertap the fat, move back.
- 1362. Powertap the fat, move back.
- 1363. What are the Latimores doing here?
- 1364. Don't worry. It's your
day. You look beautiful.
- 1365. Nuts.
- 1366. Tap, tap, tap. Tap it
off. Tap, tap. Tap...
- 1367. Norbit!
- 1368. Norbit? Norbit?
- 1369. Oh, damn. He escaped.
- 1370. Norbit! Norbit!
- 1371. Your ass is mine, Norbit!
- 1372. Yeah.
- 1373. Just now? Shit. Is he all right?
- 1374. Norbit escaped. He gonna
be headed this way. Come on.
- 1375. Hell, no.
- 1376. Norbit is coming. For shizzle?
- 1377. We have to figure out
way to stall wedding.
- 1378. Just calm down, Mr. Wong.
- 1379. I've ruined plenty of weddings
back in the day. I got this.
- 1380. Dearly beloved,
- 1381. We are gathered here today to
join these two in holy matrimony.
- 1382. Your Honor, I object!
- 1383. Object? Sir, we've not
gotten to that part yet.
- 1384. Then I'm objeculating
- 1385. No offense, my brother, but we're just
trying to keep the train rolling here.
- 1386. Oh, well, if you want to get
the train rolling, you know...
- 1387. You got to use the big "L".
- 1388. Lesbians.
- 1389. No, man. I ain't talking
about no lesbians.
- 1390. AIthough, late at night. Yes.
- 1391. Right? Yes.
- 1392. No, brother, we talking
about love. Love.
- 1393. Love is the engine that drives
the train forward, backwards,
- 1394. Side to side, round
and round love does go.
- 1395. You understand me? I got this, brother.
- 1396. I'm not talking about no $20 up
in here, back seat of the car,
- 1397. Stankystanky, hankypanky.
- 1398. No. No.
- 1399. I'm talking about good, wholesome,
- 1400. Fortified with eight
essential vitamins love.
- 1401. That cost anywhere...
- 1402. How much it cost?
- 1403. About $136, Monday through
Fridays. $212 on the weekends.
- 1404. Because of inflation.
Can I get an "Amen"?
- 1405. Amen!
- 1406. Where the hell you going, Norbit?
- 1407. None of your GD beeswax, Rasputia!
- 1408. Look at you, you old stupid
fool. You can't even ride a bike.
- 1409. Oh, yes, I can, because Kate taught me!
- 1410. Brothers and sisters. This
particular one's for the brothers.
- 1411. When you buy the ones that
say, "Ribbed for her pleasure,"
- 1412. Turn them inside out and
they ribbed for your pleasure.
- 1413. Can I get an "Amen"? Amen!
- 1414. Now, speaking of ribs and pleasure.
- 1415. Yes. For a limited time only,
we are proud to present to you
- 1416. Our barbeque, baby back, horseradish,
- 1417. Mustard and peanut butterencrusted ribs
- 1418. With a slight Jagermeister infusion
sprinkled with chamomile leaves
- 1419. With a horseradish and
dandelion salad on a bed of rice.
- 1420. Buy one Pimp Platter,
get the whole bones free.
- 1421. No, no, no! That's enough talking.
- 1422. It's time to get back to the wedding.
- 1423. It ain't never enough talking when
you talking about love, brother.
- 1424. Ain't that right? Yeah!
- 1425. Let me hear you say it, people!
- 1426. Love!
- 1427. Let me hear you sing it, choir!
- 1428. Love!
- 1429. I'm gonna rip your head off. Rasputia.
- 1430. What? Car!
- 1431. I don't give a damn about
no car. I'm ready to die.
- 1432. Car!
- 1433. I'm ready to die!
- 1434. I'm ready to die.
- 1435. I ain't gonna let you ruin
Nipplopolis for me, boy! Damn!
- 1436. I'm gonna die. I'm gonna die up in here.
- 1437. Drive the car, God damn it!
- 1438. What's up, white man? Pay for
your sins. Pay for your sins.
- 1439. We gonna change your name to Leroy.
- 1440. Amen!
- 1441. That's enough!
- 1442. That's enough! Enough!
Enough! Enough! Enough!
- 1443. Stop the music! Hold on.
- 1444. Shut up! You two, shut up!
- 1445. That's it. This is husbandandwife time.
- 1446. Now, let's go. Let's
go. Husbandandwife stuff.
- 1447. Dearly beloved,
- 1448. We are gathered here today...
- 1449. I object!
- 1450. Oh, for Christ's sake!
- 1451. Norbit. Norbit.
- 1452. Norbit.
- 1453. Norbit
- 1454. This wedding is a sham
and I'm here to stop it.
- 1455. Norbit, what are you doing?
- 1456. I'm being a man for the
first time in my life. Kate...
- 1457. Kate, I love you.
- 1458. What the hell did you just say?
- 1459. You heard what I said,
strumpet. I love Kate!
- 1460. That's right. I love you, Kate.
- 1461. And the last two weeks I spent
with you have meant more to me
- 1462. Than my whole entire miserable
life with you, Rasputia!
- 1463. It's over! Norbit Albert
Rice is no longer your bitch!
- 1464. You're dead! Get off me!
- 1465. Get your hands off me,
Black. Don't go hitting me.
- 1466. What's wrong with you, girl? What's
wrong with you? Get off of me.
- 1467. You don't talk like that with me.
- 1468. No, wait!
- 1469. No, no, wait, baby girl,
he's ruining our wedding.
- 1470. Let's just get back to the nuptials.
- 1471. We just heard condom
advice from an expimp.
- 1472. I think we can survive
a few words from Norbit.
- 1473. Deion is a fake. He's marrying
you just to get your money.
- 1474. What?
- 1475. Him and the Latimores. They
thought this whole scheme up.
- 1476. He's been married four times in the
last six years to four different women,
- 1477. And he cheated the women out of
$300,000 in divorce settlements.
- 1478. Yeah, I heard all about
it! And something else.
- 1479. They were gonna try to
steal the orphanage from you.
- 1480. That's what this whole thing is about!
- 1481. You crazy! He's got a big crush
on you. He's making this stuff up.
- 1482. Oh, yeah? I'm crazy?
I'm making it all up?
- 1483. Yes, you making it up.
Then what about this, then?
- 1484. This evidence that I have. Look at this!
- 1485. This, well...
- 1486. This used to, before it fell
in the pond, it had numbers
- 1487. And there was information.
- 1488. There was people's names
and dates and addresses
- 1489. And all kinds of incriminating things.
- 1490. I fell in the pond, but you can't
read it. But, boy, did I have your ass!
- 1491. That's nice, Norbit. Really nice.
Did you write that yourself? Pathetic.
- 1492. Kate, you have to believe me.
- 1493. Yeah, yeah, believe him, Kate.
- 1494. Remember the one that got you to sign
the papers to steal the orphanage?
- 1495. Remember that? Believe him. Go ahead.
- 1496. I'm so sorry, Norbit. I
just don't trust you anymore.
- 1497. Well, well, well,
Norbit. You lose again.
- 1498. Once a loser, always a loser,
huh? Now, come on! Let's go!
- 1499. Yeah, I thought you'd feel
that way about it, Kate.
- 1500. And that's why I took the liberty
- 1501. Of inviting some of Deion's exwives down
- 1502. So maybe they could
tell you for themselves.
- 1503. Ladies!
- 1504. Hello, Antoine.
- 1505. I've been looking for you. Daddy!
- 1506. Antoine? He told me his name was Luther!
- 1507. Who is that ho?
- 1508. He told me he was gay.
- 1509. No, no, no. Y'all got me confused with
my gay twin brother, Antoine Luther.
- 1510. You dead, gold digger!
Get your butt back here!
- 1511. I'm out!
- 1512. Looks like the wedding's off, bro.
- 1513. Church!
- 1514. God damn it, Norbit! Oh, snap!
- 1515. Get him!
- 1516. Norbit!
- 1517. Mother Mary! Jesus! Noah! Christ!
- 1518. Good.
- 1519. You going somewhere, Norbit?
- 1520. You messed up, boy. That's right.
- 1521. Now you gonna pay. Big time!
- 1522. Latimore! Keep your
fakakta hands off him!
- 1523. Go back to your shop, Abe,
before I kill you, too!
- 1524. Hey! You gonna have to kill me, as well!
- 1525. Yeah, and me, too!
- 1526. Rasputia!
- 1527. How you doing?
- 1528. I kick the shit out of you.
- 1529. Mind your goddamn business.
- 1530. Mind your business. Get
out of here. Move it.
- 1531. No, you didn't!
- 1532. Byebye.
- 1533. Bring it, bitches!
- 1534. Oh, hell to the no.
- 1535. Mrs. Henderson is
tripping, huh? Get your...
- 1536. You crazy little old
bitch. How you doing?
- 1537. Get out of the way.
- 1538. His ass is mine.
- 1539. 'Sputia? Rasputia?
- 1540. You remember "till death do
us part," don't you, Norbit?
- 1541. No!
- 1542. Whale, ho!
- 1543. Did somebody just call me a whale?
- 1544. Yeah, and a ho!
- 1545. Bingo! Right in the blow hole!
- 1546. Let's get some. We dead.
- 1547. Oh, shit! Oh, shit! Oh, shit!
- 1548. Norbit!
- 1549. Are you all right?
- 1550. All right? This is the best
I've ever felt in my whole life.
- 1551. Come here.
- 1552. Proud of that boy.
- 1553. Yes. Yes, very proud of
Norbit. He like my son.
- 1554. I'm sorry I doubted you.
- 1555. In the end, I guess you could say
everything worked out just fine.
- 1556. Kate and I took over the orphanage
and it was a dream come true.
- 1557. Oh, and we also got married. Again.
- 1558. I love you, Kate.
- 1559. Ditto.
- 1560. And I now pronounce you my wife.
- 1561. And I pronounce you my husband.
- 1562. You may kiss the bride.
- 1563. What you mean, "Ew"? No, "Ew."
Man kiss a woman, beautiful thing.
- 1564. Ling Ling. Come here
with your fine self.
- 1565. I now pronounce you man and wife.
- 1566. As for Rasputia and the
rest of the Latimores,
- 1567. We never heard from them again.
- 1568. Rumor has it they settled somewhere
in Mexico and opened the club.
- 1569. I guess they're living their dream, too.
- 1570. Say, man, don't you have any
betterlooking girls than that?
- 1571. Our best girl's coming out right now.
- 1572. Rasputia!
- 1573. Hold on, now, Pepe.
- 1574. Ain't nothing going down there unless
it got the word "peso" written on it.