1. - Kiki, I made you
this scrapbook,Copy !req
2. which I know is a bit weird,Copy !req
3. but it all means
nothing without you,Copy !req
4. because you are my everything.Copy !req
5. It's like my life
only started that dayCopy !req
6. you rode into Clitopolis
for that bounty hunting job.Copy !req
7. I didn't exactly have girls
knocking down my door,Copy !req
8. before you did.Copy !req
9. Kind of hard when everyone's
obsessed with my moms,Copy !req
10. the great Leanne and Anne,
the lives of the party.Copy !req
11. And I'm just there, too.Copy !req
12. The most boring royal in
the history of Clitopolis,Copy !req
13. as voted by the people.Copy !req
14. That was a tough day.Copy !req
15. But look at me now!Copy !req
16. No one ever thought they'd
see the day Princess SairaCopy !req
17. would have a hot
as fuck partner.Copy !req
18. I can't be exiled
to the singles zoneCopy !req
19. this year's Lesbian Ball.Copy !req
20. I know we're a bit
of an odd match,Copy !req
21. like you love travelling,
and danger, and partying,Copy !req
22. and I'm scared to go
anywhere, and of everything,Copy !req
23. and I'd rather stay home
and work on my magic tricks.Copy !req
24. But you know what they say?Copy !req
25. Opposites attract.Copy !req
26. You complete me.Copy !req
27. And I know in my heartCopy !req
28. we'll be together foreverCopy !req
29. and ever,Copy !req
30. and ever.Copy !req
31. - You're dumped.Copy !req
32. - Fuck.Copy !req
33. Oh, and she's very sad.Copy !req
34. - Look, maybe if
things were differentCopy !req
35. and you were a different personCopy !req
36. and I was a different person,Copy !req
37. maybe this could
have worked for me.Copy !req
38. But you're you,Copy !req
39. and I'm me.Copy !req
40. - I'm sorry.Copy !req
41. - Please stop crying.Copy !req
42. - I literally can't.Copy !req
43. - Hey, it's okay,
you'll be all right.Copy !req
44. You are really good
with your hands.Copy !req
45. Oh my God, oh.Copy !req
46. Oh, you're so good at that.Copy !req
47. - It's my sleight of hand.Copy !req
48. - You're smothering me.Copy !req
49. We've only been
dating like two weeks,Copy !req
50. and you made this
terrifying book.Copy !req
51. - No.Copy !req
52. - I just thought dating a
space princess would be more,Copy !req
53. ah, fun.Copy !req
54. I don't wanna Gayflix
and chill every night.Copy !req
55. - I'm sorry.Copy !req
56. - And the "Sorry's
always with the "Sorry's.Copy !req
57. - Sorry, oh, sorry
for being sorry.Copy !req
58. Can we at least still go to
the Lesbian Ball together?Copy !req
59. - Absolutely not, I
need to get outta here.Copy !req
60. Goodbye forever.Copy !req
61. Pretend you saw a smoke
bomb and I'm gone.Copy !req
62. Wait, Saira.
- Yeah?Copy !req
63. - You're wearing my jumper.Copy !req
64. - Oh.Copy !req
65. - Oh man, fuck,
that's my jumper, too.Copy !req
66. - Mm-hmm.Copy !req
67. - Ugh, you know what?Copy !req
68. Keep it, it can be
your birthday present.Copy !req
69. - Yay!Copy !req
70. - I will neverCopy !req
71. take it off.Copy !req
72. - Oh.Copy !req
73. - Yeah, I gotta get the
hell outta here, I'm sorry.Copy !req
74. Fuck, ugh, it's contagious,
goodbye forever.Copy !req
75. I'll miss you so much.Copy !req
76. Oh, and of course I'll
miss you, too, Royal Pussy.Copy !req
77. You always bring the party.Copy !req
78. This hurts me more
than it hurts you.Copy !req
79. - Honestly, I can't believe
it lasted that long.Copy !req
80. - We told you the
scrapbook was too much.Copy !req
81. - Okay, so that start
was pretty shit house.Copy !req
82. - But welcome to...Copy !req
83. That's a cool drum roll.Copy !req
84. - Our birthday party!Copy !req
85. For Saira.Copy !req
86. - Oh.Copy !req
87. - We can't believe
she's 22 today.Copy !req
88. - 23.Copy !req
89. - We can't believe she's
23 today.Copy !req
90. - Which means it's
that time of the yearCopy !req
91. where we see if she can finally
summon her royal labrys.Copy !req
92. Think she'll fail again?Copy !req
93. Is the sky rainbow?Copy !req
94. - For thousands of years,Copy !req
95. the Clitopian royal
bloodline has been bornCopy !req
96. with the ability to
summon one of the mostCopy !req
97. powerful weapons known
to l-l-lesbian kind.Copy !req
98. - The labrys.Copy !req
99. - Let us now turn to the
ancient scriptures of Wikipedia.Copy !req
100. This all began back
on Earth, it says...Copy !req
101. - "In the 1970s,
the labrys was adoptedCopy !req
102. by the lesbian community
as a feminist symbolCopy !req
103. representing strength
and self-sufficiency."Copy !req
104. - The summonings
happened first try for us.Copy !req
105. But you know what they
say, six time's the charm.Copy !req
106. - Try not to do that
over the thinking thing you do.Copy !req
107. - Wait, what do
you mean by that?Copy !req
108. - Let the
summoning begin!Copy !req
109. - It's happening.Copy !req
110. - Oh.
- Oh, for fucks sake.Copy !req
111. - Oh, sweetie,
that was really tough.Copy !req
112. Especially for us.Copy !req
113. - It is so hard
to watch you struggle,Copy !req
114. but let's not have
it ruin a good party.Copy !req
115. Who wants to see us dance?Copy !req
116. - I do, I
wanna see us dancing.Copy !req
117. - Great dancing!Copy !req
118. - Kiki, ever
since you've disappeared,Copy !req
119. who else can I talk to?Copy !req
120. I'm lost.Copy !req
121. When you left, you took
everything with you.Copy !req
122. The absence of you
is everywhere I look.Copy !req
123. - It's like a huge holeCopy !req
124. has been pumped
through my chest.Copy !req
125. But in a way, I'm glad.Copy !req
126. The pain is my only
reminder that you were real.Copy !req
127. - Kiki the Destroyer, for all
your bounty hunting needs.Copy !req
128. Hmm.Copy !req
129. Couldn't you just watch
me, like, all day?Copy !req
130. Kapow.Copy !req
131. Fuck, I'm good.Copy !req
132. Yeah, no, this is my room.Copy !req
133. Take them, not
me, what the fuck!Copy !req
134. No, no, no, no, please,
I'm too hot to die.Copy !req
135. What the fuck?Copy !req
136. Where am I?Copy !req
137. Oh, what is this?Copy !req
138. - Welcome to our cave,
that is our toxic home brew.Copy !req
139. - Who the hell are you?Copy !req
140. - Who are we?Copy !req
141. We're the Straight
White Maliens.Copy !req
142. - Who?
- Oh, come on.Copy !req
143. - Are you, are you serious?Copy !req
144. The Straight White Maliens.Copy !req
145. We used to be the
most powerful beingsCopy !req
146. in the whole universe.Copy !req
147. - Who?Copy !req
148. - Yeah, of course, everyone
has forgotten about us.Copy !req
149. Everyone!Copy !req
150. - You stripped our ancestors
of all their power and you,Copy !req
151. you left our kind for dead.Copy !req
152. - And we were exiled
to this man cave.Copy !req
153. But we've had a gut full of
being pushed us bloody side.Copy !req
154. - I'm getting upset.Copy !req
155. - You don't wanna see
us upset right now.Copy !req
156. - Oh, you don't want to see
us get bloody.Copy !req
157. - It's not good.Copy !req
158. - Let me guess, you wanna
rule the world again?Copy !req
159. - No, wrong, incorrect.Copy !req
160. - Then what do you want from me?Copy !req
161. - You?Copy !req
162. This isn't about you.Copy !req
163. - You
are just the bait.Copy !req
164. - What?Copy !req
165. - You see, we can't get
the hot chicks anymore.Copy !req
166. So for thousands of
years we've been slavingCopy !req
167. over building this chick magnet.Copy !req
168. But Larry fucked it up!Copy !req
169. - Well, I don't hear you
complaining when you eatCopy !req
170. these delicious, fresh
eggs every morning,Copy !req
171. - Your eggs are shit!Copy !req
172. You know those eggs are shit!Copy !req
173. - What are you gonna feed
the chicks when we get 'em?Copy !req
174. - Anyway, shut up, I'm
gonna feed the chicks our-Copy !req
175. Oh no, wait, that
makes a lot of sense.Copy !req
176. - Thank you.Copy !req
177. - Anyways, long story short,Copy !req
178. we ended up buying a new
Swedish chick magnet online.Copy !req
179. - But when it arrived,
what did we discover?Copy !req
180. The bloody battery's
not included.Copy !req
181. - Oh, hate that.
- Yeah, I do hate that.Copy !req
182. - And according to the manual,
the battery is Princess SairaCopy !req
183. of Clitopolis's royal labrys.Copy !req
184. What the fuck?Copy !req
185. - That seems weirdly specific.Copy !req
186. - It's so stupid!Copy !req
187. Especially because
we can't get pastCopy !req
188. that dumb Safety Bubble
protecting gay space.Copy !req
189. And that little princess is
some sort of weird shut in.Copy !req
190. It says she literally
never goes anywhere.Copy !req
191. - Literally never.Copy !req
192. - But according to the
manual, there is one thingCopy !req
193. that could lure her out
of gay space.Copy !req
194. - Kiki, finally.Copy !req
195. Wait, oh my God, where are you?Copy !req
196. - Saira, you gotta help me,
I've been captured by theseCopy !req
197. things called Straight
White Maliens.Copy !req
198. - Who?
- Oh, fuck you!Copy !req
199. Now listen, princess, we
need your royal labrys.Copy !req
200. - What, why?Copy !req
201. - For super tough
cool dude stuff.Copy !req
202. - So if you don't want us
to drown your beloved KikiCopy !req
203. in our toxic home brew,
you will bring it here,Copy !req
204. to the worst, most dangerous
place in the universe.Copy !req
205. - But-
- Saira, please tell meCopy !req
206. you actually have the labrys.Copy !req
207. - Oh yeah, totally, I've got it.Copy !req
208. Yeah, it's, it's
not on me right now,Copy !req
209. but I definitely have it.Copy !req
210. - Oh, thank God.Copy !req
211. - Great, bring it here in the
next 24 hours and come alone,Copy !req
212. or lover girl is going down,Copy !req
213. or should I say going
drown?Copy !req
214. - Oh.Copy !req
215. - Going drown.Copy !req
216. - Kiki, Kiki!Copy !req
217. - Why did you do that?Copy !req
218. You'll never summon the labrys.Copy !req
219. The only royal to fail
at this simple tradition.Copy !req
220. You're a disappointment
to your moms.Copy !req
221. To everyone.Copy !req
222. Kiki's doomed because of you.Copy !req
223. If you weren't broken, you
would have your labrys.Copy !req
224. - Can't believe
Kiki was with her.Copy !req
225. - Saira sucks.Copy !req
226. - How can
you be a princess,Copy !req
227. and not even like to party?
- Saira still sucks.Copy !req
228. - I heard
she's straight.Copy !req
229. - Ew.Copy !req
230. - You all need
to give her a break.Copy !req
231. No wonder she can't
summon her labrys.Copy !req
232. She should come to
my club, I can help.Copy !req
233. Blade, your resident weapons
expert, kisses, motherfucker.Copy !req
234. - Saira, we left
some food outside, okay?Copy !req
235. It's a banh mi.Copy !req
236. - Also, honey, we,
we hate to bring it up, but-Copy !req
237. - We put
you down as singleCopy !req
238. for the Lesbian
Ball tomorrow night.Copy !req
239. - No need, I'll be
going with Kiki.Copy !req
240. - Oh, thank God
she's taken you back.Copy !req
241. - Oh my goodness.Copy !req
242. - That is a relief.Copy !req
243. - Oh, it's just
so, so sad to be single.Copy !req
244. Well, we can only imagine it is.Copy !req
245. - Never done
it, never want to.Copy !req
246. - Like everyone can see it,Copy !req
247. 'cause there's no one
standing next to you,Copy !req
248. and when someone's single,Copy !req
249. you just imagine them in a
food court, by themselves.Copy !req
250. - Eating alone,
chatting to the cleanerCopy !req
251. who doesn't even
want to talk to you.Copy !req
252. She's got her own life,
she's not bothered with you.Copy !req
253. You look sad, sad, sad, sad.Copy !req
254. - Okay, well, we'll pop
the two of you on the list.Copy !req
255. - So glad
you've got a girlfriend.Copy !req
256. - And you're not alone.Copy !req
257. - Oh.Copy !req
258. - Mm-mm.Copy !req
259. - Whoa, awesome.Copy !req
260. - Hey, who's there?Copy !req
261. - Uh-oh.Copy !req
262. Huh?Copy !req
263. Huh?Copy !req
264. Oh, no.Copy !req
265. - Ugh, I thought
I was never gonna get offCopy !req
266. planet of the lesbos.Copy !req
267. - Who's there?Copy !req
268. - It's me, the ship.Copy !req
269. You don't wanna know how long
I've been trapped down there,Copy !req
270. the things I've seen.Copy !req
271. What's your name, sir?Copy !req
272. - Saira.Copy !req
273. - That sounds
like a girl's name.Copy !req
274. - I am a girl.
- What?Copy !req
275. Girls can't be pilots.Copy !req
276. - Yeah, this was a mistake,
take me back please.Copy !req
277. - Here's what I'll do, I'll
be your temporary ship.Copy !req
278. I'll drop you off
at a nail salonCopy !req
279. and we'll go our separate ways.Copy !req
280. So, Sahara, where are you from?Copy !req
281. - Clitopolis.Copy !req
282. - Yeah, but like
where are you from?Copy !req
283. - The palace?Copy !req
284. - No, no, no, where
are you really from?Copy !req
285. - Well, my cultural
heritage is half Clitopian,Copy !req
286. and half Indian.Copy !req
287. - Namaste.Copy !req
288. - Hey, please turn
around, you don't understand.Copy !req
289. I, I've never been
outside of the-Copy !req
290. - Oh God, that was
an awful night.Copy !req
291. I hope that Shetland
pony survived.Copy !req
292. Oh my God, this fucking
song again.Copy !req
293. Hey daddy.Copy !req
294. - Huh?Copy !req
295. - I am Safety Bubble, fierce
protector of gay space.Copy !req
296. They say space is a vacuum,
but nothing sucks like me.Copy !req
297. What are you doing?Copy !req
298. - Oh, let us out of here.Copy !req
299. - Why the hell would you
want to go out there?Copy !req
300. It's straight, also, it's like
way dangerous or whatever.Copy !req
301. Or as they say in German.Copy !req
302. - Danger is
my middle name, baby.Copy !req
303. - Ew, how did you
even get in here?Copy !req
304. You can definitely leave.Copy !req
305. - No, no, no, no, no, no, no.Copy !req
306. - Yes, sweet freedom!Copy !req
307. Beautiful, isn't it?Copy !req
308. - Oh, no.Copy !req
309. - Babe,
what's for dinner?Copy !req
310. - Chicken.Copy !req
311. - Oh, no.Copy !req
312. - This one's for
my bodacious baby.Copy !req
313. I love you, baby girl.Copy !req
314. - It's worse than
I ever imagined.Copy !req
315. - Okay, okay, now there
are gonna be a lotCopy !req
316. of really hot chicks
coming in here soon.Copy !req
317. - Yeah.
- And we need to learnCopy !req
318. how to charm them
bloody heck out of 'em.Copy !req
319. - Mm.Copy !req
320. - Now Josh is our expert speakerCopy !req
321. for today.
- Hi.Copy !req
322. - He was once successful in
getting a woman's number.Copy !req
323. Now we don't know what
happened after that.Copy !req
324. We called the number
and the line was dead.Copy !req
325. I dunno if Josh mistook it down.Copy !req
326. - No, phone companies.Copy !req
327. - Phone company sort of going,Copy !req
328. maybe playing tricky
business, maybe doing-Copy !req
329. - Tricky business.Copy !req
330. - Maybe tricky business
was going on, some sort of-Copy !req
331. - Tricky business.Copy !req
332. - Some sort of tricky
business was going onCopy !req
333. with the phone companies.Copy !req
334. Number didn't work.
- Yeah.Copy !req
335. - Obviously, phone companies
playing tricky business.Copy !req
336. Still, huge achievement.Copy !req
337. And now Josh is gonna come and
he's gonna tell everyone hereCopy !req
338. what you know about
talking to chicks.Copy !req
339. - All right, gents, boys,
thanks for having me.Copy !req
340. - Josh.Copy !req
341. - Show of hands, who
wants to meet a chick?Copy !req
342. - Me.Copy !req
343. - Hands up if you
don't know the processCopy !req
344. of how to go about that,Copy !req
345. who wants to walk outta here
today with chicks in hand?Copy !req
346. - Ooh.
- Yeah.Copy !req
347. - Yeah.
- Fuck yeah.Copy !req
348. - Now, take note
boys, all right?Copy !req
349. Act like you are listening
and then interjectCopy !req
350. over the top of it, that
gets the chicks ticking.Copy !req
351. Don't let 'em get a word
in edgeways, with me.Copy !req
352. - Don't let 'em
get a word in edgeways.Copy !req
353. - Let them know how much
Reddit karma you have, as well.Copy !req
354. - I have a lot of
opinions on Marvel movies.Copy !req
355. Would, would they be
interested in them?Copy !req
356. - They'll love that.Copy !req
357. - Okay, firstly, if you
want a chick to like you,Copy !req
358. you need to connect with them.Copy !req
359. Ask questions and listen,Copy !req
360. no matter how boring
the answers are.Copy !req
361. And secondly, let me go now
and no one will get hurt.Copy !req
362. But if you don't, when
I get myself loose,Copy !req
363. I will kill every
single one of you.Copy !req
364. - What did she say?Copy !req
365. - Please take me back,
this was a mistake.Copy !req
366. - What, aren't you excited
to get your nails done?Copy !req
367. - I don't wanna
get my nails done.Copy !req
368. I have to keep
them short, anyway.Copy !req
369. - Oh God, well, where can
I drop you then, Pilates?Copy !req
370. Supermarket?Copy !req
371. Why did you even board meCopy !req
372. if you don't want
to go anywhere?Copy !req
373. - Well, I thought-
- Come on.Copy !req
374. You can't stay with me and
I'm not taking you back.Copy !req
375. So pick somewhere, chop chop.Copy !req
376. - S Club.
- I can't hear you.Copy !req
377. - Do you know
where S Club 17 is?Copy !req
378. - The party hub,
now you're talking.Copy !req
379. I can't remember how
to get there, though.Copy !req
380. Hmm.Copy !req
381. I have a good feeling
about this way.Copy !req
382. Such a strong feeling
about this way.Copy !req
383. Don't even think about it.Copy !req
384. Now, what takes you
to S Club 17, hmm?Copy !req
385. - I need to find a way to
summon my royal labrys.Copy !req
386. - Whoa, yeah, say no more, I
know that part of the vagina.Copy !req
387. - And then I need
to go to the worst,Copy !req
388. most dangerous place
in the universe.Copy !req
389. - What, are you mental?Copy !req
390. - I don't think people
say that anymore.Copy !req
391. - I'll take you to S
Club 17, but no further.Copy !req
392. - But my girlfriend is there.Copy !req
393. - What the fuck is your
friend doing there?Copy !req
394. - She's in trouble and
she's my girlfriend.Copy !req
395. - Yeah, like a girl
who's a friend.Copy !req
396. - Like, my partner, I'm
literally from Clitopolis.Copy !req
397. - Oh, yeah.Copy !req
398. - She used to be my
girlfriend, at least.Copy !req
399. - Wait, so she's your ex?Copy !req
400. - Well, technically yes,
but maybe if I can save her-Copy !req
401. - Oh God, this,
this is pathetic.Copy !req
402. - Fuck, what am I doing?Copy !req
403. - Oh, hello!Copy !req
404. No one actually goes the
speed limit, poofter.Copy !req
405. - You definitely can't
say that anymore.Copy !req
406. - Oh, what is their problem?Copy !req
407. Oh, these guys have been rude.Copy !req
408. What do you think you're doing?Copy !req
409. - Sorry!Copy !req
410. - Mutiny, mutiny!Copy !req
411. I was distracted, for
not even one second,Copy !req
412. and you have gone and couped me.Copy !req
413. I am a man, and I have rights.Copy !req
414. My old pilots were right, and
you just cannot trust women.Copy !req
415. I'm hurt, I'm hurt, now
what are we gonna do?Copy !req
416. We're gonna die out here,
I told you not to drive.Copy !req
417. - Sorry.Copy !req
418. - You are covering
my insurance premiums,Copy !req
419. okay, from now on.Copy !req
420. - Maybe there's
moon crystals on this moon?Copy !req
421. - Even if there was,
we don't have anyone capable,Copy !req
422. brave, or strong
enough to find them.Copy !req
423. - Yeah, sorry.Copy !req
424. - Sweet, sweet freedom, only
to get stuck somewhere elseCopy !req
425. shitty.Copy !req
426. - What if I went?
- You?Copy !req
427. Ugh, yeah right.Copy !req
428. - Well, just sitting
here isn't going to help.Copy !req
429. How bad could it-Copy !req
430. Be?Copy !req
431. Oh, thank God.Copy !req
432. - It's gone.
- Oh.Copy !req
433. - If you'd have been
here two years ago.Copy !req
434. It's just me, I'm
gonna go over this way.Copy !req
435. There's nothing here.Copy !req
436. Oh, you found a hole.Copy !req
437. Ugh, make a friend,
lost a friend.Copy !req
438. - Huh?Copy !req
439. - Yes.Copy !req
440. - So shiny, right?Copy !req
441. - Please don't hurt me.Copy !req
442. - Whoa, do I look like
I'm going to hurt you?Copy !req
443. Oh, the goth thing?Copy !req
444. Oh, it's just a look, I'm
not going to hurt you.Copy !req
445. I thought you could
hear me singingCopy !req
446. that moon crystal song.Copy !req
447. - What?Copy !req
448. Listen, I crashed my ship
and I need this moon crystal.Copy !req
449. My girlfriend's, well,
technically ex-girlfriend'sCopy !req
450. life depends on it.Copy !req
451. - My goodness, you've
got a lot on your plate.Copy !req
452. Look, I'm just sorry
for scaring you.Copy !req
453. - Oh, sorry.Copy !req
454. - Why are you sorry?Copy !req
455. - I don't know.Copy !req
456. - Enough apologies.Copy !req
457. I'm so glad you are here.Copy !req
458. I came to this moon to
write my solo album,Copy !req
459. but I fell down a hole.Copy !req
460. - I fell down a hole, too.Copy !req
461. - We have so much in common.Copy !req
462. I'm Willow.Copy !req
463. - I'm Princess
Saira of Clitopolis.Copy !req
464. - Whoa, a princess.Copy !req
465. Also, I hear that place
is famously hard to find.Copy !req
466. - It's actually not, if
you know what you're doing.Copy !req
467. - Well, maybe you could
show me the way sometime?Copy !req
468. I mean, if we can ever figure
out how to get out of here,Copy !req
469. let me tell you, I've
been down here a whileCopy !req
470. and there's no obvious way out.Copy !req
471. - I'm not sure if this will
help, but what if we use that?Copy !req
472. - I did not see that.Copy !req
473. - Gross, what is this?Copy !req
474. - I feel like I should
know what that is.Copy !req
475. Weird, it wasn't here before
you broke the crystal.Copy !req
476. - Great, so this is my fault.Copy !req
477. - It's okay, look,
these things happen.Copy !req
478. Here, let me help you.Copy !req
479. - Why is everything
always so hard?Copy !req
480. - You are so emo.Copy !req
481. I love it!Copy !req
482. - Why did I think a reject
like me could do anything?Copy !req
483. - Hey, hey, it's gonna be okay.Copy !req
484. - Why is it not targeting you?Copy !req
485. - I don't know.Copy !req
486. Wow, I'm really
grateful for that.Copy !req
487. - You're like,
annoyingly positive.Copy !req
488. - Thanks for saying that.Copy !req
489. - Wait, maybe it's respondingCopy !req
490. to me being negative
about myself.Copy !req
491. Sorry, I remember now, we
sang a song about this.Copy !req
492. It's this incredibly
dangerous sentient gooCopy !req
493. that feeds on bad vibes.Copy !req
494. - So I should just say somethingCopy !req
495. positive about myself, right?Copy !req
496. - Great idea.Copy !req
497. Come on, quick.Copy !req
498. - I,Copy !req
499. I don't know.Copy !req
500. - You don't know?Copy !req
501. Saira?Copy !req
502. Saira!Copy !req
503. Really good at holding
a conversation,Copy !req
504. and I can write a song
about basically anything.Copy !req
505. I did a great job coordinating
my spikes and chains today,Copy !req
506. I have the voice of an
angel, my eyebrows are great,Copy !req
507. and also my guitar,Copy !req
508. my public speaking
has never been better.Copy !req
509. I'm ambitious, and I'm brave.Copy !req
510. And if I was a Pokemon,Copy !req
511. I'd be a freaking
Pikachu, I'm that cute.Copy !req
512. - No, the crystal.Copy !req
513. - Just
forget it, keep going.Copy !req
514. - Stupid, stupid, stupid,
I needed that crystal.Copy !req
515. I couldn't do it.Copy !req
516. - Stop,
you're encouraging it.Copy !req
517. It's gonna blow!Copy !req
518. - What did you do?Copy !req
519. - I'm sorry.Copy !req
520. - Please tell me
you've got the moon crystal.Copy !req
521. - Yes.Copy !req
522. - Oh, that's a relief.Copy !req
523. - But then I lost it.Copy !req
524. - I knew you
couldn't do it, you idiot!Copy !req
525. Now we're completely fucked!Copy !req
526. - Oh man, it's a shame
we can't use that one.Copy !req
527. Where to next?Copy !req
528. I'm driving.Copy !req
529. - Where the
fuck did she come from?Copy !req
530. - They.Copy !req
531. - There's more than one?Copy !req
532. - Okay, so just remember when
your permanent is tapped,Copy !req
533. you can't tap that card again
until it's been untapped.Copy !req
534. - And only when
your turn begins.Copy !req
535. When your turn begins, then
you can untap your tap cardsCopy !req
536. so they can be used again.Copy !req
537. Do you understand?Copy !req
538. - Oh, and there are
different phasesCopy !req
539. each with their
own set of rules.Copy !req
540. So the beginning phase rules-Copy !req
541. - Please, stop,
if you don't stop,Copy !req
542. I'm going to make
you stop, I mean it.Copy !req
543. I really am going to get
myself loose any minute now.Copy !req
544. - Why can't you chicks
ever like what we like?Copy !req
545. Now about the beginning phase.Copy !req
546. - Ooh, yes, the beginning phase.Copy !req
547. - Wait, so you need this
labrys thing to save Kiki,Copy !req
548. and your only hope is
that this Blade personCopy !req
549. that you found on
the future net,Copy !req
550. and know nothing about,
will be able to help?Copy !req
551. - Yeah, I know, it's-Copy !req
552. - Such a good plan.Copy !req
553. - Is it, though?Copy !req
554. Hey, be careful, go
straight, go straight.Copy !req
555. - Typical.Copy !req
556. I'll have you know,
I'm actually bisexual.Copy !req
557. - Are bisexuals
really a thing?Copy !req
558. - Where did you find this
thing, the 21st century?Copy !req
559. - Yeah, that is where I'm from.Copy !req
560. - Oh.Copy !req
561. - Hey, thanks for
saving me back there.Copy !req
562. - Oh, no, thank you,
that was a thrill.Copy !req
563. Besides, I might not have
found that ladder without you.Copy !req
564. I'm not super observant.Copy !req
565. Or book smart or street smart.Copy !req
566. - Oh, I'm sorry.
- Why?Copy !req
567. It's not a bad thing, I'm
just smart in other ways.Copy !req
568. Like I'm super creative.Copy !req
569. - That's right,
you're a songwriter?Copy !req
570. - Trying to be, you see...Copy !req
571. - Oh, oh, oh,
you better not sing it.Copy !req
572. - Wow.
- Fuck my life.Copy !req
573. - They never used to let
me play my own songs.Copy !req
574. They said they were tooCopy !req
575. indie.Copy !req
576. Now, I finally get to
figure out my own musicCopy !req
577. separate from the group.Copy !req
578. I thought I'd be able to
write songs on the moon,Copy !req
579. but let me tell you, there
was not a lot to write about.Copy !req
580. But I'm hoping hanging with
you will inspire some songs.Copy !req
581. I mean, an inter galactic
space quest to save your ex?Copy !req
582. Oh, wow.Copy !req
583. - Oh, I'm actually
really boring.Copy !req
584. - I don't think you are.Copy !req
585. - No, I think
she is, she really is.Copy !req
586. - Look, I love the emo vibe,
but you must have somethingCopy !req
587. positive to say about
yourself, right?Copy !req
588. What's something you're good at?Copy !req
589. - Well, I'm not bad at magic.Copy !req
590. - That's so cool, I'd
love to see a trick.Copy !req
591. - No, you wouldn't.Copy !req
592. - Ah, yeah, I would-
- Pick a card.Copy !req
593. - Ooh.
- Okay.Copy !req
594. So we're going to use your
card, the ace of hearts,Copy !req
595. and put it in the
middle of the deck.Copy !req
596. - Yeah.
- Because it's oneCopy !req
597. of the only cards that
acts like a helium balloon.Copy !req
598. If I push it the whole way in.Copy !req
599. - Uh-huh.
- Like this,Copy !req
600. and snap my fingers.Copy !req
601. Did you see it come
back to the top?Copy !req
602. - What the freak?Copy !req
603. - We'll do it again,
we'll take it.Copy !req
604. We'll put it in the
middle like that,Copy !req
605. now if I don't snap my fingers,Copy !req
606. the card doesn't
come to the top.Copy !req
607. But if I either snap or
cover it just for a secondCopy !req
608. did you see it come
back to the top?Copy !req
609. - Oh my God!Copy !req
610. - We'll try this one more time,
I'll take it just like this.Copy !req
611. In fact, I might use
your hand for this.Copy !req
612. You can press it, the whole
way in, into the middle.Copy !req
613. Here we go.Copy !req
614. Oh.Copy !req
615. Huh?Copy !req
616. - What did, how,
wait, oh my God!Copy !req
617. That's so cool,
you're really good.Copy !req
618. - No one's ever stayed
for a whole trick before.Copy !req
619. - Well, they're missing out.Copy !req
620. - What do you guys think
about the sex sceneCopy !req
621. in "Blue is the Warmest Colour?"Copy !req
622. I'm figuring that one out.Copy !req
623. All right here,
we are, S Club 17.Copy !req
624. This is where that
lady who can help youCopy !req
625. find your laprys will be.Copy !req
626. - You mean, we have
to go in there?Copy !req
627. - Yeah.Copy !req
628. - Not looking like
this, we won't.Copy !req
629. It's montage time, baby!Copy !req
630. - What?Copy !req
631. - Oh, I'm good with
what I've got on.Copy !req
632. - Come on, you can't
go in there like that.Copy !req
633. - But Kiki gave this to me.Copy !req
634. - Seriously?Copy !req
635. What's so great about this Kiki?Copy !req
636. - Well,Copy !req
637. she's just like,Copy !req
638. reallyCopy !req
639. fucking hot.Copy !req
640. - Wait, is that seriously it?Copy !req
641. - It's just, there's only
one Kiki the Destroyer.Copy !req
642. No one ever gave me a
chance, but she did.Copy !req
643. And being with her was
like getting the keysCopy !req
644. to this better life.Copy !req
645. Without her, I'm like, nothing.Copy !req
646. - You know, that's
kind of how I feltCopy !req
647. after I left the group.Copy !req
648. But you know what
made me feel better?Copy !req
649. A makeover!Copy !req
650. Come on, it's time to
make you fucking hot, too.Copy !req
651. Not that you aren't already,
I mean, that came out wrong.Copy !req
652. - Uh-huh, uh-huh,
uh-huh, mm-hmm.Copy !req
653. - Sorry!Copy !req
654. - Willow?Copy !req
655. - Sorry, sorry.Copy !req
656. - Bow-wow!Copy !req
657. - It's perfect.Copy !req
658. - What did you do?Copy !req
659. Take off-
- I took off the jumper.Copy !req
660. - Okay, I'll beam you over now.Copy !req
661. Do you remember how to get back?Copy !req
662. - Yeah, I'm pretty sure.Copy !req
663. - You sound unsure.Copy !req
664. Okay, let me explain again.Copy !req
665. - Thanks so much, but
I think we got it,Copy !req
666. the first three
times you told us.Copy !req
667. - Oh, you say that now.Copy !req
668. But it can be pretty easy to
get confused and mixed up,Copy !req
669. especially if you're a
lady, or whatever you are.Copy !req
670. And you know, not
used to tech stuff.Copy !req
671. - Honestly,
I reckon we got this.Copy !req
672. - Just one more time.Copy !req
673. What you need to do is get
up the remote beam trackerCopy !req
674. and press the beam button.Copy !req
675. Oh, fuck my life.Copy !req
676. - Thank God!Copy !req
677. He just kept
talking and talking.Copy !req
678. - I can't believe I did that.Copy !req
679. - I love this place.Copy !req
680. - Oh, God.Copy !req
681. - I'm Blade, this is my club.Copy !req
682. - Oh man, it's gonna
be hard finding Blade.Copy !req
683. - That was easy.Copy !req
684. - Okay, what's the plan.Copy !req
685. - Should we go up and say hi?Copy !req
686. - But how will we get
into the air vent?Copy !req
687. - What if she actually
doesn't want to help?Copy !req
688. - Genius, okay, you
go find a screwdriver,Copy !req
689. and I'll get the pineapple.Copy !req
690. - You're right, we can do
this if we're together.Copy !req
691. - This is VIP.Copy !req
692. - Willow?Copy !req
693. - Willow ditched you.Copy !req
694. Your plans are stupid.Copy !req
695. Blade doesn't wanna help you.Copy !req
696. You will always be broken.Copy !req
697. You should just give up.Copy !req
698. - We need to talkCopy !req
699. about Ryan.Copy !req
700. I swear he's cheating
on me with Stephanie,Copy !req
701. and he is totally
gaslighting me.Copy !req
702. Like, why would he post
all those selfies with her,Copy !req
703. and what, you know, what
is, if that's just the vibe,Copy !req
704. but like, don't
tell me I'm crazy.Copy !req
705. That's how things ended
the last time.Copy !req
706. So like I'm,
I'm not crazy, right?Copy !req
707. Right?
- What?Copy !req
708. - Thanks for agreeing.Copy !req
709. So yeah, he just always
puts himself before me,Copy !req
710. and makes me feel like
a loser.Copy !req
711. - You shouldn't let him
make you feel so terrible.Copy !req
712. Why do you let him do that?Copy !req
713. - He's just, like,
really fucking hot.Copy !req
714. I just, I can't
believe he likes me.Copy !req
715. - Surely there's lots to love?Copy !req
716. - Well, I do listen a
lot when he's talkingCopy !req
717. to me about his video game.Copy !req
718. I don't even, I don't know
what's going on in there,Copy !req
719. but he seems really excited.Copy !req
720. So he's telling me about AK-47.Copy !req
721. I don't know what that is,
but it makes him happy.Copy !req
722. And I'm really good
at shoplifting.Copy !req
723. - It sounds like this RyanCopy !req
724. doesn't appreciate
how great you are.Copy !req
725. - Oh my God, you're right.Copy !req
726. Thanks, babes, I needed
to hear that.Copy !req
727. It's wild to think I
won't remember any of thisCopy !req
728. in the morning and we'll never
see each other ever again.Copy !req
729. You know what?Copy !req
730. You're right, screw
him, I'm great.Copy !req
731. You're like the wisest, coolest,Copy !req
732. prettiest person I've ever met.Copy !req
733. You fucking rock, girl.Copy !req
734. - Hey, Blade, I need to
speak to you, please?Copy !req
735. - What?Copy !req
736. - I said, I need to
speak to you, please.Copy !req
737. - What?Copy !req
738. - I said-
- I'll come down.Copy !req
739. Coming down.Copy !req
740. Fucking, fucking.Copy !req
741. Well, hello.Copy !req
742. - Hi.Copy !req
743. How's it going?Copy !req
744. I'm Princess Saira from-Copy !req
745. - I know who you are.Copy !req
746. - Ah, cool, yeah,
yeah, well, yeah.Copy !req
747. I saw on the future net
that you might be ableCopy !req
748. to help me summon
my royal labrys?Copy !req
749. - You think you can
just come into my club,Copy !req
750. march into the VIP area, make
me come down from my throne,Copy !req
751. and expect me to just help
you summon your labrys?Copy !req
752. If that's what you
think, you would beCopy !req
753. absolutely right.Copy !req
754. I am so excited you're here.Copy !req
755. Princess Saira, it
would be my honourCopy !req
756. to help you out, darling.Copy !req
757. - Oh, oh my God, really?Copy !req
758. Thank you.Copy !req
759. - Get up, you
little sweaty bitch.Copy !req
760. You know, we're actually not
so different, Princess Saira.Copy !req
761. - Really?Copy !req
762. - I mean, my parents
aren't queens or anything,Copy !req
763. but they are renowned
psychologists, and ooh girl,Copy !req
764. when people talked
shit about me,Copy !req
765. I tried for the
longest time to fit in,Copy !req
766. and be the psychological
professional my
parents wished for.Copy !req
767. But I realised if there's no
room for you to be yourself,Copy !req
768. fuck it, go and make
it yourself, girl.Copy !req
769. I finally followed
my real passion.Copy !req
770. - Drag?
- Weapons.Copy !req
771. They love the drag, but
the weapons, they said,Copy !req
772. "Blade, your behaviour
is very concerning."Copy !req
773. But like, don't
call your kid BladeCopy !req
774. and expect them not to
be into blades, right?Copy !req
775. Speaking of blades, your labrys.Copy !req
776. I'll tell you what's
causing you trouble.Copy !req
777. As with all
metaphysical weapons,Copy !req
778. the key to unlocking your
labrys is a mental one.Copy !req
779. The wiring is all there.Copy !req
780. You just need to make
the right connections.Copy !req
781. - So, I'm not broken?Copy !req
782. - Not at all, and
luckily, I happen to knowCopy !req
783. a thing or two about psychology.Copy !req
784. Now let mama help you find
your labrys, you ready?Copy !req
785. - Mm-hmm.Copy !req
786. - Okay, close your eyes.Copy !req
787. - This is safe, right?Copy !req
788. - Of course, we're
only meditating.Copy !req
789. I want you to take
a deep breath in.Copy !req
790. And out.Copy !req
791. Now babes, it might feel likeCopy !req
792. you're not in control
of your own mind,Copy !req
793. but just a conscious
is actually tryingCopy !req
794. to protect you in a
roundabout kind of way,Copy !req
795. and a saboteur, all that shit.Copy !req
796. But it's only as powerful
as you let it be.Copy !req
797. Now look around at
your surroundings,
what do you notice?Copy !req
798. Reach out and touch the door.Copy !req
799. Feel the handle,
feel its smoothness.Copy !req
800. - This won't work.Copy !req
801. - Remember,
you're the boss.Copy !req
802. Breathe in.Copy !req
803. And out.Copy !req
804. At your own pace, hold the
handle firmly and pull.Copy !req
805. - Wait, Saira, I wanna
hang out with you.Copy !req
806. Just kidding, I ditched
you because you-Copy !req
807. - Bore me.Copy !req
808. Bore me, bore me.Copy !req
809. Bore me.Copy !req
810. You bore me.Copy !req
811. - Why do
we keep trying?Copy !req
812. - Boring.Copy !req
813. - Huh?Copy !req
814. Can't you just stay
here with me today?Copy !req
815. - We can't,Copy !req
816. we'll be late for our
royal orgy, sweetie.Copy !req
817. - Can I show
you my magic show now?Copy !req
818. - Not now, Saira,
we're gonna be lateCopy !req
819. for our own burlesque show,
much cooler than magic.Copy !req
820. - You should
do burlesque instead.Copy !req
821. - I'm 10.Copy !req
822. Wanna come over
after school, maybe?Copy !req
823. - Will the
queens be there?Copy !req
824. - No, they're away.Copy !req
825. - Sorry, I can't.Copy !req
826. - What did we do
wrong, it can't be us.Copy !req
827. - Waste of space.Copy !req
828. - Something
wrong with her.Copy !req
829. - Happened
the first try, right?Copy !req
830. - You can't have it.Copy !req
831. - But it's mine.Copy !req
832. - You're not
good enough for it.Copy !req
833. - Yes, I am.Copy !req
834. Yes, finally, yes, yes, yes.Copy !req
835. - Yoink.
- Yes?Copy !req
836. - I'll take that.
- Huh?Copy !req
837. - Finally, a labrys is
mine, all mine.Copy !req
838. I can't believe you fell for
it, you basic little bitch.Copy !req
839. - Wait, I thought you
wanted to help me.Copy !req
840. - Nah.Copy !req
841. I can't believe you
didn't see that.Copy !req
842. - But I need it.Copy !req
843. - Not when you're dead.Copy !req
844. Time to christen
this beautiful blade.Copy !req
845. - Whoopsies, finally found you.Copy !req
846. Sorry I took so long, it took
me ages to find the pineapple.Copy !req
847. What's it for?Copy !req
848. - What?Copy !req
849. - Oh, hey, you found
the labrys thing.Copy !req
850. - Okay, so Blade is not cool.Copy !req
851. - Yeah, she's trying
to steal my labrys.Copy !req
852. - Oh, hell no.Copy !req
853. - What are you gonna do, fight
me with a pineapple?Copy !req
854. - Oh, it all makes sense now.Copy !req
855. - Ow, what the fuck?Copy !req
856. - Willow!Copy !req
857. - Ha, have you ever
used an axe before?Copy !req
858. Ha, even with that
beautiful weapon,Copy !req
859. you can't defend yourself
against a pineapple.Copy !req
860. You're a joke.Copy !req
861. No, what are you doing to it?Copy !req
862. - No.Copy !req
863. - Fuck, you bitch.Copy !req
864. Yeah, that's how
you use it.Copy !req
865. - Now who's a joke,
you bitch?Copy !req
866. - Hey.Copy !req
867. Welcome back.Copy !req
868. - Is she okay, is she awake?Copy !req
869. - Yes, she's okay, you
can stop freaking out now.Copy !req
870. - I wasn't freaking out,
you were, I don't care.Copy !req
871. - I beamed us back hereCopy !req
872. after you decapitated
that Blade lady.Copy !req
873. You are such a badass.Copy !req
874. - Wait, where's my-
- Hey, hey, hey.Copy !req
875. Shh, shh, it's okay, it's okay.Copy !req
876. It's here.Copy !req
877. - What?Copy !req
878. No, where's my labrys?Copy !req
879. - Oh, that, yeah,
that's here too.Copy !req
880. - I really was pretty
badass back there.Copy !req
881. - Yeah, I have a
huge crush on you.Copy !req
882. Wait, did I say that out loud?Copy !req
883. - Yes.Copy !req
884. - It's just...Copy !req
885. - Oh, no, no, no,
no, no, that got you.Copy !req
886. That song was about you.Copy !req
887. - I got that.Copy !req
888. - Ooh, yeah.Copy !req
889. Called it.Copy !req
890. - That's been there
this whole time?Copy !req
891. - Yep, it's been in
front of you all along.Copy !req
892. - We're not talking
about the button, are we?Copy !req
893. - No, I'm talking about the
button, I saw it ages ago.Copy !req
894. - Oh.Copy !req
895. - How can
you even have sex?Copy !req
896. - Now that he's gone.Copy !req
897. Woof woof.Copy !req
898. Are yours hands magic?Copy !req
899. - Hello there, lady at bar.Copy !req
900. - Hello.
- Hi.Copy !req
901. Well, what, do, I
like your dress.Copy !req
902. - Thank you.Copy !req
903. - I wore a nice
shirt to this bar.Copy !req
904. - It's making me horny.Copy !req
905. - Perch hands.Copy !req
906. - Drink, drink, ask about
a drink, ask about a drink.Copy !req
907. - I'm thirsty.Copy !req
908. - Oh, are you thirsty?
- Yeah.Copy !req
909. - She gave you the leading,
just go for it, man.Copy !req
910. Just go for it, just
be yourself, bro.Copy !req
911. - Can I get you with my
money, a drink for you?Copy !req
912. - Oh yes, please.Copy !req
913. - Close the deal,
close the deal.Copy !req
914. - Now that I have purchased
you a drink, you owe me sex?Copy !req
915. - Yes.
- Yes, correct.Copy !req
916. - Hey, don't be so mean,
this is a safe space.Copy !req
917. - What's so funny?Copy !req
918. - It's just like,Copy !req
919. I don't get why this
is so hard for you.Copy !req
920. - Oh, wow, so predictable,Copy !req
921. from the lady of
colour who's a lesbian.Copy !req
922. I'm really shocked,
lesbian of colour.Copy !req
923. The whole universe is built
around you, lesbian of colour.Copy !req
924. - Here's something that I
guarantee you did not know.Copy !req
925. Did you know that crash
test dummies are builtCopy !req
926. around the average size
and proportions of a woman?Copy !req
927. What if we get into a crash?Copy !req
928. - And look at this phone.Copy !req
929. They make these for chicks.Copy !req
930. How am I supposed to use this
tiny phone with my huge hands?Copy !req
931. It's a tiny fucking lesbian
phone, fuck you lesbian phone!Copy !req
932. - We gotta be confident.Copy !req
933. We gotta be too-
- But not too-Copy !req
934. - But not too confident.
- Don't be too confident.Copy !req
935. Don't be too confident.Copy !req
936. - We gotta be beautiful.Copy !req
937. - But not too beautiful.
- But not too beautiful.Copy !req
938. - Can't be too beautiful.Copy !req
939. Can't look too good.Copy !req
940. - You gotta have nice shoe,
you gotta, everything you do,Copy !req
941. everything you do, I gotta
do backwards in flat shoes.Copy !req
942. Do you understand?Copy !req
943. You've got the support of heels.Copy !req
944. I just, it is hard for us, too,
and I just think sometimes.Copy !req
945. - Oh, no.
- Oh.Copy !req
946. - So, no, I'm sorry, I'm just...Copy !req
947. - Oh.
- I know.Copy !req
948. No, he does this.Copy !req
949. - We can't win.
- He's just upset.Copy !req
950. - I'm not, I'm not upset,
I, these are angry tears.Copy !req
951. I'm so angry I'm crying.Copy !req
952. - Ugh, you should
just stop complaining.Copy !req
953. Screw this, my life is
hard too, that's it.Copy !req
954. I'm really doing it this time,
I'm getting myself loose.Copy !req
955. Yeah!Copy !req
956. - No, no, no, no.Copy !req
957. - Oh.Copy !req
958. I think it's time you realise
who has the power here.Copy !req
959. Kill the lesbian!Copy !req
960. - To be or not to be.Copy !req
961. That is the question.Copy !req
962. Oh, God, oh, this
is the most painfulCopy !req
963. and horrible death anyone
could ever experience!Copy !req
964. Oh God, why me,
why, why?Copy !req
965. - Bro, I said kill the
lesbian, not the thespian.Copy !req
966. What the heck, bro.Copy !req
967. - You can hear they sound-
- Yes.Copy !req
968. - The same.Copy !req
969. - I understand.Copy !req
970. - I mean, I know this
isn't my argument,Copy !req
971. but I'm pretty sure
you said thespian.Copy !req
972. - I don't think I did.Copy !req
973. When I say kill the lesbian,Copy !req
974. I'm talking about,
quite specifically, her.Copy !req
975. And you know that, you
do this, you team up and-Copy !req
976. - You said thespian.
- You pick on me.Copy !req
977. Fucking, I swear to
God I didn't, and if
I did, I apologise.Copy !req
978. - Now, who's the lesbian, hey?Copy !req
979. - What, no.Copy !req
980. - That
doesn't make sense.Copy !req
981. - No, no, no, no, no, do, what?Copy !req
982. Do you know what a lesbian,
do you know what a lesbian is?Copy !req
983. - Yes.
- What.Copy !req
984. - They're, they get on stage.Copy !req
985. - That's a thespian.Copy !req
986. - And, and, and date
someone of the same sex.Copy !req
987. That's a lesbian thespian.Copy !req
988. - It's a lesbian.Copy !req
989. - No, no, it's a
lesbian thespian.Copy !req
990. - Just kill the lesbian,
just kill the lesbian.Copy !req
991. - Every lesbian in "The L
Word" was also a thespian.Copy !req
992. - Yes, that's fair, you
cannot argue with that.Copy !req
993. - No, and I never
would, either way,Copy !req
994. we're getting off topic.
- Mm.Copy !req
995. - And I would like to kill
the lesbian, we gotta-Copy !req
996. - We already killed her.Copy !req
997. - No, we killed the thespian,
you killed the thespian, the-Copy !req
998. - Yes, and that's
what you wanted.Copy !req
999. - I thought you said thespian.
- No.Copy !req
1000. No, shut up, stop talking now.Copy !req
1001. All right, now.Copy !req
1002. Kill the lesbian.Copy !req
1003. - Wait, wait, wait, I'm
sorry, you're right.Copy !req
1004. Women like me suck, we
take up too much space.Copy !req
1005. - Ah, no, no, no,
no, no, too late.Copy !req
1006. I am sick of you
always patronising us.Copy !req
1007. - But you need me, mm-hmm.Copy !req
1008. Saira's not gonna give you
the labrys for nothing.Copy !req
1009. Do you really want to
invite a lesbian with oneCopy !req
1010. of the most powerful weapons
in the universe to your cave,Copy !req
1011. and then tell them you've just
killed the person they love?Copy !req
1012. - Well, if she
loves you so much,Copy !req
1013. what is taking her so long?Copy !req
1014. - Just let me talk to her.Copy !req
1015. I promise I can get her here.Copy !req
1016. - Fine, but you better
hope she's close by.Copy !req
1017. I am done waiting.Copy !req
1018. Button!Copy !req
1019. New time limit,
princess, one hour.Copy !req
1020. - What?Copy !req
1021. - You can thank big
mouth over here for thatCopy !req
1022. and all the mean things
she's been saying.Copy !req
1023. About me and my friends.Copy !req
1024. - Saira, wait, where are you?Copy !req
1025. Is that sex hair,
who the fuck is that?Copy !req
1026. - Hey, I'm Willow,
Saira's new partner.Copy !req
1027. - What, no, they're no one.Copy !req
1028. - Oh.Copy !req
1029. - Wait, I didn't
mean that, I'm sorry.Copy !req
1030. - Are you serious?Copy !req
1031. - I mean, I'm sorry,
they're no one.Copy !req
1032. - Oh.Copy !req
1033. - I mean, I don't
know, I'm confused.Copy !req
1034. I'm just,Copy !req
1035. sorry.Copy !req
1036. - No, Saira, I'm sorry.Copy !req
1037. I can see now, I screwed things
up, I never appreciated you.Copy !req
1038. But Saira, you are the only oneCopy !req
1039. who can bring your royal
labrys and save me.Copy !req
1040. Now, but now I've lost you,
and now I'm going die.Copy !req
1041. - No.Copy !req
1042. - That's not true, I'll
come, of course I'll come.Copy !req
1043. - You have one hour.Copy !req
1044. - Kiki!Copy !req
1045. - Willow, I'm sorry.Copy !req
1046. - It's okay, if Kiki
means this much to you,Copy !req
1047. we can open this
relationship up.Copy !req
1048. - No, Willow, I think maybeCopy !req
1049. you and I should
just be friends.Copy !req
1050. - You're friend zoning me?Copy !req
1051. I hid the body for you,
not the head, though.Copy !req
1052. I figured they'll
never figure outCopy !req
1053. who it belongs to
without the body.Copy !req
1054. You know, I don't
even like murder.Copy !req
1055. I just wanted you to like me.Copy !req
1056. - I do really like you.Copy !req
1057. I think you're the first
proper friend I've ever had.Copy !req
1058. I got a bit caught up in that.Copy !req
1059. Now I've messed it up.Copy !req
1060. - I just need some time.Copy !req
1061. And I'm taking this, you
owe me that at least.Copy !req
1062. - It's yours.Copy !req
1063. - Don't let them see you cry.Copy !req
1064. I definitely have some
inspiration for my album now.Copy !req
1065. - I'm sorry.Copy !req
1066. I really hope we can be friends.Copy !req
1067. - Fuck you, Saira.Copy !req
1068. - Finally, how was it?Copy !req
1069. Wait, where's the other one?Copy !req
1070. What happened?Copy !req
1071. Did she, they dump you, too?Copy !req
1072. - I kind of dumped them.Copy !req
1073. - Why would you do that?Copy !req
1074. They seem to genuinely like
your boring personalityCopy !req
1075. and magic tricks.Copy !req
1076. - Because I've gotta save Kiki.Copy !req
1077. - Oh man, you
still wanna do that?Copy !req
1078. - I, I can't just abandon her.Copy !req
1079. Listen, I know you didn't
wanna come this far,Copy !req
1080. but she needs me.Copy !req
1081. Is it okay if I drive
us to the worst,Copy !req
1082. most dangerous place
in the universe?Copy !req
1083. - No pilots ever asked me if
I'm okay with something before.Copy !req
1084. Honestly, they were
a bit mean.Copy !req
1085. - Well, what do you say,
wanna stick with me?Copy !req
1086. - I mean, we've come
this far.Copy !req
1087. Sorry, you really hit a nerve.Copy !req
1088. Yeah, whatever, let's go.Copy !req
1089. - Hold on.Copy !req
1090. That's the worst, most
dangerous place in the universe?Copy !req
1091. - Yeah, apparently this is it.Copy !req
1092. - Do you
know what this is?Copy !req
1093. It's like one, one of those
world's best cup of coffeeCopy !req
1094. bullshit slogan things.Copy !req
1095. It's like, "Oh yes,
that shitty little cafeCopy !req
1096. has the world's
best cup of coffee."Copy !req
1097. - Ship.Copy !req
1098. - What?Copy !req
1099. - Oh, God.Copy !req
1100. - Hey.Copy !req
1101. I'm so happy.Copy !req
1102. - It shot us!
- Right in the face.Copy !req
1103. I'm sorry I took you here,
you should take us back.Copy !req
1104. - Don't you dare.Copy !req
1105. You are not the same
shy, sad, pathetic,Copy !req
1106. boring, miserable princess you
were when you hopped aboard.Copy !req
1107. My generous wisdom and
guidance has helped shape youCopy !req
1108. into the strong lady warrior
sitting here right now.Copy !req
1109. So what are you
gonna do, Sangria?Copy !req
1110. - I know what to do.Copy !req
1111. Okay, mama's driving
now.Copy !req
1112. - Ow, fuck.Copy !req
1113. It's really on me.Copy !req
1114. - Shit, this isn't
working.Copy !req
1115. I think I've got an idea.Copy !req
1116. - I trust you.Copy !req
1117. - Take it back, I take
it back, I don't trust you!Copy !req
1118. - Oh, that does not sound good.Copy !req
1119. - What, me?Copy !req
1120. I feel great.Copy !req
1121. Get outta here, go save
your stupid ex-girlfriend.Copy !req
1122. Oh, and I guess,
be careful, okay?Copy !req
1123. - Hey.Copy !req
1124. Thanks for being
an ally back there.Copy !req
1125. - Ew, what?Copy !req
1126. I'm not gay.Copy !req
1127. - Boys, I
miss the thespian.Copy !req
1128. - Hey.
- What?Copy !req
1129. - Oh, you
shouldn't have-Copy !req
1130. - I've got the labrys.Copy !req
1131. - Shouldn't have
killed the thespian.Copy !req
1132. - I miss that thespian.Copy !req
1133. - Shouldn't have
killed the thespian.Copy !req
1134. - Putting on plays and stuff.Copy !req
1135. - Why'd you tell
him to kill the thespian?Copy !req
1136. - I said, hey, I've
got the labrys.Copy !req
1137. - I remember specifically.
- I fucking didn't.Copy !req
1138. They did my favourite one
man show of "Book of Mormon."Copy !req
1139. - Yeah.Copy !req
1140. - Our labrys is here!Copy !req
1141. - Oh.
- Our labrys is here!Copy !req
1142. Gimme, gimme,
gimme, gimme, gimme,Copy !req
1143. gimme, gimme, gimme,
gimme.Copy !req
1144. - Oh.Copy !req
1145. Now, let Kiki go.Copy !req
1146. - Oh, gladly, terrible deal for
you if you ask me, take her.Copy !req
1147. Get her outta here,
look at the labrys.Copy !req
1148. - Hey.Copy !req
1149. - You saved me.Copy !req
1150. I'm free!Copy !req
1151. I'm finally free.Copy !req
1152. Oh God, I thought I
was gonna die, whew.Copy !req
1153. - You know, if we
hurry, we could still goCopy !req
1154. to the Lesbian Ball together.Copy !req
1155. - Yeah, I don't think so.Copy !req
1156. - Ooh, rough.Copy !req
1157. - But I came all
this way for you.Copy !req
1158. - Yeah, well, you kind
of got me into this mess.Copy !req
1159. - But you said that
maybe if I was different.Copy !req
1160. - Listen, I'm so
grateful you saved me.Copy !req
1161. I'm genuinely impressed
you made it here.Copy !req
1162. - Mm-hmm.Copy !req
1163. - But I don't owe you
anything, nothing's changed.Copy !req
1164. - But I have.Copy !req
1165. - Ugh, again, with the crying.Copy !req
1166. Look, I really don't
want to be mean,Copy !req
1167. but it never really made senseCopy !req
1168. that I was with you
in the first place.Copy !req
1169. You know what I mean?Copy !req
1170. - What's happening to it?Copy !req
1171. - Fuck!Copy !req
1172. - What the hell,
princess, we had a deal!Copy !req
1173. I'm upset, fuck!Copy !req
1174. - Fuck!
- Fuck!Copy !req
1175. - Huh?Copy !req
1176. Huh.Copy !req
1177. - I knew you
couldn't ignore me for long.Copy !req
1178. You haven't changed at all.Copy !req
1179. Get it into your thick head.Copy !req
1180. You are not good
enough for Kiki.Copy !req
1181. Without her, you're nothing.Copy !req
1182. - That's not true.Copy !req
1183. - Yes, it is.Copy !req
1184. Even your own moms
don't like you.Copy !req
1185. - Just stop it,
stop criticising me.Copy !req
1186. - What the fuck?Copy !req
1187. - You
disappoint everyone.Copy !req
1188. I'm just telling you how it is.Copy !req
1189. - Are you?Copy !req
1190. Maybe my moms are
just bad parents.Copy !req
1191. Maybe Kiki is actually
a narcissistic asshole,Copy !req
1192. and I deserve better.Copy !req
1193. I'm not always the problem.Copy !req
1194. - Yes you are.Copy !req
1195. - I don't think so.Copy !req
1196. - You're a boring
little wimp, and you know it.Copy !req
1197. - Ah, shut the fuck
up.Copy !req
1198. - Oh, good and great, you got
it back, now hand it over.Copy !req
1199. - No.Copy !req
1200. - What?
- What?Copy !req
1201. - What?Copy !req
1202. - But you said we could have itCopy !req
1203. if we gave you the mean lady.Copy !req
1204. - You can't have a lesbian
and a lesbian thing.Copy !req
1205. - That's too many-Copy !req
1206. - What?
- Things,Copy !req
1207. 'Cause we don't have any-Copy !req
1208. - What?
- What?Copy !req
1209. - I'm crying.Copy !req
1210. - No, you're not.Copy !req
1211. - Aren't I?
- No.Copy !req
1212. - We had a deal!Copy !req
1213. - Yeah, well,
sometimes things don't work outCopy !req
1214. how you want them to.Copy !req
1215. - Oh, well we know
that all too well.Copy !req
1216. - Give it
back, it's ours!Copy !req
1217. - Actually, it's mine.Copy !req
1218. - Oh, oh.Copy !req
1219. - Why do you even need it?Copy !req
1220. - Well, because if we
don't have your labrysCopy !req
1221. to power our chick magnet, then
we'll never get hot chicks.Copy !req
1222. - And we'll be losers forever.Copy !req
1223. - Wait, that's seriously
why you want it?Copy !req
1224. - We don't exactly have chicksCopy !req
1225. knocking down our door.Copy !req
1226. - No.
- I leave my door open,Copy !req
1227. and they still
don't come through.Copy !req
1228. - Yeah, but all the chick
magnets in the worldCopy !req
1229. won't help you.Copy !req
1230. I went through all of this.Copy !req
1231. And why, 'cause I
wanted Kiki to love me?Copy !req
1232. But now I see my biggest problemCopy !req
1233. was that I didn't
even love myself.Copy !req
1234. We deserve to love ourselves
without a chick magnetCopy !req
1235. or a hot as fuck girlfriend.Copy !req
1236. - Wow, I mean, no,
you're full of shit.Copy !req
1237. Get her, boys!Copy !req
1238. - Incoming
chicks, incoming chicks.Copy !req
1239. Incoming chicks, incoming
chicks, incoming chicks.Copy !req
1240. - Wait, guys, I, I just
had a random thought.Copy !req
1241. All the chick magnets in
the world won't help us.Copy !req
1242. We went through all
of this, and why?Copy !req
1243. Because we wanted
chicks to love us.Copy !req
1244. But now I see our
biggest problemCopy !req
1245. is that we don't
even love ourselves.Copy !req
1246. - Oh.Copy !req
1247. - We deserve to love ourselves
without a chick magnet,Copy !req
1248. or a hot as fuck girlfriend.Copy !req
1249. - Wow, that was beautiful, bro.Copy !req
1250. - I'm proud of you, man.Copy !req
1251. - You are so smart.
- Thank you.Copy !req
1252. - God, you all
deserve one another.Copy !req
1253. Shame you can't just
date each other.Copy !req
1254. - I mean, we would have the
best time, like all the time.Copy !req
1255. - Yeah, and well,
I guess they do sayCopy !req
1256. you should date
your best friends.Copy !req
1257. - Yeah.
- Yeah, they do say that.Copy !req
1258. And I hear, I hear sexuality
is a bit of a spectrum.Copy !req
1259. - It is.
- Can be.Copy !req
1260. It is a spectrum.
- You know what I mean?Copy !req
1261. - It is, it's a whole-Copy !req
1262. - Yeah.Copy !req
1263. - It's
a whole spectrum.Copy !req
1264. - Yeah.
- So, you know.Copy !req
1265. - Yeah, yeah.
- Put it out.Copy !req
1266. We would have the best time.Copy !req
1267. - Oh.Copy !req
1268. - Hmm, oh, yeah.Copy !req
1269. - Just, Larry.
- Yeah.Copy !req
1270. - Just come over
here for a second, yeah.Copy !req
1271. - Okay, just a little.Copy !req
1272. - Oh, yeah.Copy !req
1273. - Can I
just have a soft one?Copy !req
1274. - Oh.Copy !req
1275. - Can you do
the rough stuff with me?Copy !req
1276. - Come here, you.Copy !req
1277. - Let me in.Copy !req
1278. - I told you we're not
going anywhere without Saira.Copy !req
1279. - What are you doing?Copy !req
1280. - Saira?Copy !req
1281. Oh, thank God you're
okay.Copy !req
1282. Mind if ICopy !req
1283. bum a lift?Copy !req
1284. - Yeah, I just don't think
that would really make sense.Copy !req
1285. You know what I mean?Copy !req
1286. - Oh, come on, are you
seriously mad at me?Copy !req
1287. - Yeah.
- Fair.Copy !req
1288. - You're looking better.Copy !req
1289. - Yeah, it
was mostly just cum.Copy !req
1290. - Oh, fuck, shit,
shit, shit, shit, shit.Copy !req
1291. - We don't wanna
ever see you again.Copy !req
1292. - Oh, you
can have this back.Copy !req
1293. - I've never been
more attracted to you.Copy !req
1294. - Where to now, Sasha?Copy !req
1295. - Back to Clitopolis.Copy !req
1296. - No.Copy !req
1297. - Also, just as a
heads up, it's Saira.Copy !req
1298. - Oh my God.Copy !req
1299. Have I been saying it
wrong the whole time?Copy !req
1300. That is so embarrassing.Copy !req
1301. I am so sorry, Saiyeera.Copy !req
1302. - Saira.Copy !req
1303. - That's what I'm saying.Copy !req
1304. - No, listen
to what I'm saying.Copy !req