1. One video camera... Beta! By golly.Copy !req
2. Good evening, my friend.
Welcome. So nice to see you.Copy !req
3. I need money to buy gas so
I can get out of this place.Copy !req
4. Yes, of course.Copy !req
5. You will be showing me
what is in the sack then?Copy !req
6. I can give you a hand. May I?Copy !req
7. Just open up here.Copy !req
8. Oh, my, my, my!
What is this horrible thing?Copy !req
9. He's a good luck charm.Copy !req
10. Yes, I can see it's
working very well.Copy !req
11. Whatever you do,
don't touch the medallion.Copy !req
12. No, I won't.Copy !req
13. I am giving you...Copy !req
14. - 10...
- No!Copy !req
15. $20.Copy !req
16. Goodbye.Copy !req
17. Come back soon!Copy !req
18. Oh, my! Only a face
a mother could love.Copy !req
19. Nothing but junk!Copy !req
20. "Don't touch," he says,
because it might break. It's so cheap.Copy !req
21. Oh, my goodness. Gosh.Copy !req
22. Oh, Gupta, by golly.
You're a bloody genius.Copy !req
23. You're making a
wonderful deal for $20.Copy !req
24. I like Indian food! So spicy!Copy !req
25. Who are you?Copy !req
26. I'm a leprechaun, me lad,
and you're a greedy thief.Copy !req
27. For trying to steal me gold,
I'll be giving you some grief.Copy !req
28. Have a lie-down, lad.Copy !req
29. Nice leather! I appreciate
a good pair of shoes.Copy !req
30. Ah!Copy !req
31. Don't mind if I do!Copy !req
32. I think I'll whack you in the head
a dozen times until you're dead.Copy !req
33. Take it away! Take it away!Copy !req
34. - You're being afraid of this?
- Stay away, I'm warning you.Copy !req
35. I'll tear your eyes out
and I'll rip your face off.Copy !req
36. You're a bloody devilish creature!Copy !req
37. You wanted me gold,
and you suffer the consequences.Copy !req
38. Now I'll take what's mine,
and be gone from here.Copy !req
39. No! You and your
gold belong to Gupta.Copy !req
40. Well, you missed us both.Copy !req
41. You wanna back up and try that again?Copy !req
42. - Sorry.
- It's all right, happens all the time.Copy !req
43. Do you know anything about cars?
'Cause this one doesn't work.Copy !req
44. - Name's Scott.
- Tammy.Copy !req
45. Tammy. Great.
What seems to be the problem?Copy !req
46. Obviously, I don't know.
It just died on me.Copy !req
47. Well, let's take a look.Copy !req
48. Ah! Well, see,
someone stole your engine.Copy !req
49. Start it up for me, if you can.Copy !req
50. - What do you think?
- Have you ever blown a rod before?Copy !req
51. I beg your pardon?Copy !req
52. The engine, I meant.Copy !req
53. See, you got your pistons,
and your rods, and...Copy !req
54. - You don't wanna know this, right?
- No, actually, I don't.Copy !req
55. I'll give you 10 bucks if
you give me a ride to work.Copy !req
56. Forget it.Copy !req
57. You don't have to pay me.
Where do you work?Copy !req
58. Chicago.Copy !req
59. Yeah, got me.Copy !req
60. Chicago.Copy !req
61. That's very good. I would
have taken you there, too.Copy !req
62. Where is it? I know
it is here somewhere.Copy !req
63. Here it is. "Legends and Folklore."Copy !req
64. "Leprechauns."Copy !req
65. Good day to ya.Copy !req
66. The name's O'Reilly, and I'm here
to tell you about leprechauns.Copy !req
67. Legend has it that they were once
magical elves in ancient timesCopy !req
68. who became obsessed
with riches and gold.Copy !req
69. 96,Copy !req
70. 97.Copy !req
71. 98, 99...Copy !req
72. I'm one shilling short!Copy !req
73. Wow! Look at all the lights!
It's unbelievable!Copy !req
74. Yeah, it's a quaint little place.Copy !req
75. - So where do you work?
- The Lucky Shamrock.Copy !req
76. - What's that?
- It's a casino, Scott.Copy !req
77. What do you do there?Copy !req
78. - I'm a magician.
- Right on!Copy !req
79. Actually, right now,
I'm just a magician's assistant.Copy !req
80. But one of these days,
I'm gonna have my own act.Copy !req
81. I believe you.Copy !req
82. One little, two little
three little leprechaunsCopy !req
83. Four little, fiveCopy !req
84. little, sixCopy !req
85. little leprechaunsCopy !req
86. This place is unknown,
so I'll leave it here.Copy !req
87. Me own savings and loan.
I'll have nothin' to fear.Copy !req
88. Remember, his power lies in his gold,
and he'll use all his magic to protect it.Copy !req
89. Yes, try to protect it from this.Copy !req
90. So is this your first trip to Vegas?Copy !req
91. Yeah. Actually, I'm just passing
through. I'm on my way to LA.Copy !req
92. Oh.Copy !req
93. - You're gonna be a movie star?
- No, actually, I'm on my way to school.Copy !req
94. My first year of college.Copy !req
95. Great! It's a smart move. Go to school.
Learn something worthwhile.Copy !req
96. I just thought I'd swing through Vegas,
you know, see what it's like.Copy !req
97. Take my advice and don't stay long.Copy !req
98. Yeah?Copy !req
99. Vegas has a way of
latching on to a person.Copy !req
100. You wanna go, but you can't.Copy !req
101. I'll remember that.Copy !req
102. Potatoes are a leprechaun's
favorite meal.Copy !req
103. Like all good Irishmen,
he loves his spuds,Copy !req
104. but he'll take a bite out of anybody
who threatens to steal his gold.Copy !req
105. Woe betide the man who
covets a leprechaun's shillin'.Copy !req
106. He'll batter and brain them,
he'll mangle...Copy !req
107. My, my, my!Copy !req
108. Now let us go find your
little brothers and sisters.Copy !req
109. In fact, let us find
the entire family.Copy !req
110. If a mortal gets hold
of a leprechaun's gold,Copy !req
111. he'll be given one wish for
every shilling in his possession.Copy !req
112. He can have anything he
wants in the whole world.Copy !req
113. Thanks for the ride.
I really appreciate it.Copy !req
114. - Sure.
- Bye.Copy !req
115. Hey, I've never been
inside a real casino.Copy !req
116. Oh, forget it. You gotta be 21.Copy !req
117. I know, but I thought maybe
you could sneak me in,Copy !req
118. so I can see what it's like inside.Copy !req
119. What do you think? This is
like Disneyland or something?Copy !req
120. I could lose my job for that.
My boss could lose his license.Copy !req
121. And you will lose your shirt.Copy !req
122. Right. I didn't think
about that. I'm sorry.Copy !req
123. All right, look.Copy !req
124. If I get you into the den of iniquity
here, you gotta promise me something.Copy !req
125. - No gambling.
- Okay.Copy !req
126. Just take a look around,
see what you gotta see, and beat it.Copy !req
127. - I'm out of there.
- All right.Copy !req
128. So who do you work with?
I mean, magician-wise?Copy !req
129. Right now, I'm assisting
The Great Fazio.Copy !req
130. What's a Fazio?Copy !req
131. Well, Scott, a Fazio is a mediocre
magician who couldn't pull a rabbit...Copy !req
132. out of a pet store.
But it pays the bills.Copy !req
133. Remember now, no trouble,
okay? In and out.Copy !req
134. Okay.Copy !req
135. Maybe I could come see your show,
and we could have dinner afterwards.Copy !req
136. Er, it's a possibility, if I'm
not busy. Who knows?Copy !req
137. In you go.Copy !req
138. You are mine, you little bugger.Copy !req
139. You missed me! You missed me!Copy !req
140. If you're gonna linger,
I'll give you the finger.Copy !req
141. Stay away from me,
you steaming pile of cannibal dung!Copy !req
142. I'm a dangerous man!Copy !req
143. Stay away from me!Copy !req
144. Leprechauns do have
their loveable side...Copy !req
145. Why, I remember when Paddy
McGinty's goat was sick with...Copy !req
146. I want me shilling!Copy !req
147. Oh, Yes, yes!Copy !req
148. All right.Copy !req
149. Whoa!Copy !req
150. Thank you, Melissa.Copy !req
151. You're terrible.Copy !req
152. - Come on.
- Yes!Copy !req
153. All right!Copy !req
154. Roll again, Father Bob!Copy !req
155. - Give me those dice here.
- More money.Copy !req
156. More money, more money. Here we go.Copy !req
157. Ready?Copy !req
158. Here she goes. Look at this!Copy !req
159. - Yes!
- Whoo! All right.Copy !req
160. Excellent.Copy !req
161. What time is it?Copy !req
162. It's after 7:00. Where's Tammy?Copy !req
163. I don't know, damn it!
She's got work to do!Copy !req
164. What do you keep her around
for anyway? She's not worth a damn.Copy !req
165. She's got a way of
filling out a costume.Copy !req
166. I could look just as good, you know.
Why don't you hire me?Copy !req
167. Twenty years ago, Loretta,
or should I say 20 pounds ago?Copy !req
168. I am not always gonna
look just like this, pally.Copy !req
169. No? You find the fountain
of youth or something?Copy !req
170. I've been saving
my pennies, buddy boy,Copy !req
171. and one of these days, I'm gonna
come waltzing in that doorCopy !req
172. with everything packed
into all the right places.Copy !req
173. You need more than a boob job, Loretta.
You need a personality transplant.Copy !req
174. Bitch!Copy !req
175. I'm sorry I'm late, Fazio.Copy !req
176. I told you, you will
address me as "Great One."Copy !req
177. Off stage and on.Copy !req
178. You're a magician, not the Pope.Copy !req
179. I am your teacher.
You will show me respect.Copy !req
180. Right.Copy !req
181. Loretta.Copy !req
182. Mmm-hmm.Copy !req
183. Throw me that lighter.Copy !req
184. Ow!Copy !req
185. - Are you doing the magic rings tonight?
- Screw the magic rings.Copy !req
186. Oh, my God!Copy !req
187. I've got something 10 times better.Copy !req
188. You're in the box, I do
the standard switch gag,Copy !req
189. and then I set fire to the box!Copy !req
190. The audience goes nuts, thinking
you're in there being burnt alive.Copy !req
191. I'm gonna call it
"The Burning Beauty."Copy !req
192. Oh, God!Copy !req
193. What the hell is going on here?Copy !req
194. Fazio, is this the fabulous
stunt you wanted me to see?Copy !req
195. What are you, nuts?Copy !req
196. Only a moron would try something
like this. You believe this guy?Copy !req
197. It'll be great, Mitch.
I'll make sure she's got protection.Copy !req
198. Forget it. End of discussion.Copy !req
199. I'm not taking any chances
with my future headliner.Copy !req
200. How you're doing, babe?
You look sensational.Copy !req
201. - Thanks.
- Now, you.Copy !req
202. Get out there and
mix with the suckers.Copy !req
203. Do something like... Do some
card tricks or something.Copy !req
204. Keep them entertained.Copy !req
205. Out of the question! I work
the main room! I'm a star.Copy !req
206. You're a schmuck. Now get out
there and earn your pay, Fazio.Copy !req
207. That goes for you, too.
Break is over. Back to work.Copy !req
208. So, you need anything,
you know who to come to, right?Copy !req
209. - Right. Right.
- Yeah.Copy !req
210. You keep playing hard to get.
You mark my words, you'll come around.Copy !req
211. I guarantee.Copy !req
212. I saw that.Copy !req
213. Rolling, rolling, rolling!
Where she stops, nobody knows.Copy !req
214. And winner, winner, winner!Copy !req
215. We have a winner!Copy !req
216. - To the sharp-dressed man!
- Thank you.Copy !req
217. You'll need a dump truck
to take it all home, mister.Copy !req
218. A rack for you.Copy !req
219. Here, this is for you.Copy !req
220. What a gentleman!Copy !req
221. Everyone's a winner today.Copy !req
222. Excuse me, sir, do you know
where I can cash a check?Copy !req
223. Are you old enough
to be in here, kid?Copy !req
224. Oh-oh! Yes. You're old enough.Copy !req
225. Right over there.
You have a good day.Copy !req
226. Hey, Mitch, how's it hanging?Copy !req
227. Hi, fellas! Listen, not now, okay?
I've got business.Copy !req
228. Stay here!Copy !req
229. What are you, a 44 regular?Copy !req
230. You know, I've got a plaid that'll
make you look 20 pounds younger.Copy !req
231. - What do you want, Art?
- What do I want?Copy !req
232. I want brown hair. I want health
insurance for all Americans.Copy !req
233. I want the Mets to get
their shit together.Copy !req
234. Let's not worry about what I want,
let's worry about what I need.Copy !req
235. - I need my money.
- Tomorrow. Tomorrow's good.Copy !req
236. I'll stop by your store and
we'll take care of everything.Copy !req
237. - Tell him.
- Okay? Excuse me.Copy !req
238. Look sharp, be sharp.Copy !req
239. No, tell him the other thing,
the threat thing.Copy !req
240. You pay Arthur the money
you owe him or I will kill you.Copy !req
241. That's good.Copy !req
242. What are you, tough guys?
I got hemorrhoids tougher than you.Copy !req
243. Hey!Copy !req
244. On the other hand,Copy !req
245. why don't we meet a little later
over by the cashier's cage?Copy !req
246. How's 10:00 for you? It's good
for me if it's good for you.Copy !req
247. - 10:00? Wait, when do you take your break?
- 9:30.Copy !req
248. 9:30 to 9:45? Think you can
make it back by 10:00?Copy !req
249. - 10:00.
- Okay, 10:00. 10:00's good.Copy !req
250. - You mind?
- Yeah.Copy !req
251. You buy off the rack,
that's what happens.Copy !req
252. I could've taken him.Copy !req
253. No, no, he couldn't. You, bigger.Copy !req
254. Get 'em down, get 'em down,
before the wheel goes 'round.Copy !req
255. We're gonna have somebody lucky before
the night is over. You feelin' lucky?Copy !req
256. You feelin' lucky, sugar?
What you gonna do with all that?Copy !req
257. I believe I'll try this one.Copy !req
258. Dangerous man, I like it.Copy !req
259. And the wheel goes round and round,
no more bets, no more bets.Copy !req
260. Ah!Copy !req
261. There was an old man of Madras
whose balls were made of fine brass,Copy !req
262. so, in stormy weather,
they both clanged together,Copy !req
263. and sparks flew out of his arse.Copy !req
264. I'm finding this to be a very
funny and poetic leprechaun.Copy !req
265. I'm glad you liked it, lad.Copy !req
266. Now you left the door open, so I
assuming you wanted to see me.Copy !req
267. Yes. I'm wanting to
discuss things with you.Copy !req
268. - For instance?
- I want to negotiate.Copy !req
269. I am for giving you this medallion,Copy !req
270. which you are terribly, terribly
afraid of, for half your gold.Copy !req
271. Half me gold for a
worthless medallion?Copy !req
272. This is my final offer!
You are taking it or leaving it.Copy !req
273. You got a deal, lad.Copy !req
274. Now, put it away, why don't you?Copy !req
275. Perhaps I'll do a little fishin'.Copy !req
276. I told you a terrible lie,
and now you're going to die.Copy !req
277. Eighteen red. We got a winner!Copy !req
278. I can't... I can't believe it!Copy !req
279. How could this happen to me?Copy !req
280. Place your bets, place your bets.Copy !req
281. Tough luck, kid.
So, you're gonna bet or what?Copy !req
282. Bet?Copy !req
283. - Get 'em down.
- You want me to bet?Copy !req
284. I had $23,000.Copy !req
285. Looks like you got a couple hundred.
You can get hot.Copy !req
286. Get 'em down, get 'em down.
Big spender, big spender.Copy !req
287. And the wheel goes round and
round and round, get 'em down.Copy !req
288. There you go.Copy !req
289. Where the hell were you?Copy !req
290. I told you, the trap door
keeps getting stuck.Copy !req
291. That's what I get for working at
a dump like this, nothing works.Copy !req
292. Get away from me! Get away from me!Copy !req
293. Get away!Copy !req
294. No more bets, no more bets!Copy !req
295. Feelin' lucky, Mr. Big
Time Spender? Mr...Copy !req
296. Here she's dropping.Copy !req
297. Green, double zero!Copy !req
298. The house makes out. Sorry, folks!Copy !req
299. What have I done?
I'm ruined, I'm finished.Copy !req
300. What, are you kidding me?
You're due, you're gonna make it big.Copy !req
301. - Place your bets!
- What?Copy !req
302. Yeah. Trust me.Copy !req
303. Bad streak of luck like that,
no way you're gonna lose.Copy !req
304. Get 'em down before
the wheel goes around.Copy !req
305. - Really?
- Yeah, trust me.Copy !req
306. But I don't have any more money.Copy !req
307. Nice watch there. Could bring
a nice chunk of change.Copy !req
308. My grandpa gave me
this watch for graduation.Copy !req
309. Make him proud. Make a comeback. Win.Copy !req
310. Pawn shop across the street,
tell him Loretta sent you.Copy !req
311. Get 'em down, get 'em down!
She's dropping.Copy !req
312. Where's me shilling?Copy !req
313. I want me shilling!Copy !req
314. Help!Copy !req
315. No! No! No!Copy !req
316. Tell me where it is, or by me
sainted mother, I'll strangle ya!Copy !req
317. This must be the place.Copy !req
318. This is your last chance.
I'm warnin' you.Copy !req
319. I want me shilling!Copy !req
320. Oh, no! What was I thinking?Copy !req
321. With all this killing,
I've lost me shilling!Copy !req
322. Hello!Copy !req
323. Anybody here?Copy !req
324. Hello?Copy !req
325. Oh, my God!Copy !req
326. Oh, man!Copy !req
327. I thought I had problems.Copy !req
328. Operator, listen.Copy !req
329. I'm in a pawn shop across the street
from the Lucky Shamrock Casino.Copy !req
330. And I found a dead person.Copy !req
331. Yeah, I'm sure.Copy !req
332. Yeah.Copy !req
333. All right, I'll wait right here.Copy !req
334. A leprechaun is very territorial.Copy !req
335. He can never tolerate another
leprechaun crossing his boundaries.Copy !req
336. One leprechaun can be aggravating,
but two can be devastating.Copy !req
337. With that in mind, let's review what
we've learned about leprechauns.Copy !req
338. Number one,
his power lies in his gold.Copy !req
339. Without it, he's just another
gnome full of mischief.Copy !req
340. Number two, each of his gold shillings
will bring a wish come trueCopy !req
341. to anyone who possesses them.Copy !req
342. A wish?Copy !req
343. I wish I was back at the
casino on a winning streak.Copy !req
344. I've lost him!Copy !req
345. He's got me shilling!Copy !req
346. He's got me shilling!Copy !req
347. What the heck am I doing here?Copy !req
348. There are no other bets, no other bettors.
Just the house and the golden boy.Copy !req
349. He's riding seven red,
let's see how lucky he gets.Copy !req
350. Hell! A seven red! We got a winner!Copy !req
351. You gonna let that ride, golden boy?Copy !req
352. And the luckiest man in Las Vegas
puts the whole load on 13 black.Copy !req
353. Thirteen black is up,
nobody else is betting.Copy !req
354. Ah! Lovely golden palaces
completely full of richesCopy !req
355. I'll rip them off and rob 'em blind,
those dirty sons of bitches!Copy !req
356. Yeah!Copy !req
357. Black 13! Another winner,
another winner!Copy !req
358. This guy's got a hell
of a winning streak.Copy !req
359. Winning streak. I wished
for a winning streak.Copy !req
360. - What the hell is going on here?
- Unbelievable. He can't lose.Copy !req
361. Two hours ago, he's losing his shirt.
Now, I can't stop him.Copy !req
362. Well, you better stop him, or else.Copy !req
363. Any other bettors? No other bettors!Copy !req
364. On the way to being a millionaire.Copy !req
365. Six black. Here we go!Copy !req
366. Come on, baby, make me a winner.Copy !req
367. And it's a...Copy !req
368. The hits just keep on coming!Copy !req
369. A winner!Copy !req
370. I've about had it with you, Loretta.Copy !req
371. I don't know. I did what you told me.
Something went wrong.Copy !req
372. Yeah. Well, you better get the money back
or something will go wrong, with you.Copy !req
373. You know what I mean?Copy !req
374. - Hmm-mmm.
- Good.Copy !req
375. "Golden Nugget."
I'd like one of those.Copy !req
376. He's a winner again!Copy !req
377. Ladies and gentlemen,Copy !req
378. due to a slight solacrivenance in the
stem of the wheel, the situation is thus.Copy !req
379. This table is closed,
but it's only temporary.Copy !req
380. So, come back in a little while.
All right? Thank you very much.Copy !req
381. Thank you.Copy !req
382. Congratulations. You've had some...
Some amazing streak of luck.Copy !req
383. - I mean, truly amazing.
- Thanks!Copy !req
384. I don't know how it happened.Copy !req
385. I mean, I was losing everything,
then all of a sudden...Copy !req
386. Yeah, right. You see,
that's how it happens sometimes.Copy !req
387. Tell me, kid, you...
You staying here at the hotel?Copy !req
388. - No, actually, I'm not.
- Well, let's just change that.Copy !req
389. Here you go. I would
like you to be our guest.Copy !req
390. Anything you want, it's on me. Okay?Copy !req
391. Wow!Copy !req
392. - Thanks a lot!
- Oh, oh, no problem.Copy !req
393. Listen, why don't you just relax,
take a break, come back in an hour or so,Copy !req
394. and then see if you can keep
that winning streak going?Copy !req
395. - What do you say, kid?
- Yeah.Copy !req
396. Boy, I can't wait
to get back into it.Copy !req
397. Man, Las Vegas is really
turning out to be a great place.Copy !req
398. Vegas, the greatest
little town in the world.Copy !req
399. I'll see you in a while, kid.Copy !req
400. We'll keep the same table
reserved just for you.Copy !req
401. - Okay, I'll be here.
- That's good.Copy !req
402. Jesus!Copy !req
403. Schmuck.Copy !req
404. Tammy, you won't
believe what happened!Copy !req
405. What are you doing here?
You're not supposed to be gambling!Copy !req
406. - I won!
- All that?Copy !req
407. Scott, you said you wouldn't gamble.Copy !req
408. I know, I know,
but something happened to me.Copy !req
409. It's like I've got the
fever or something.Copy !req
410. I mean, I was losing my shirt,
and then I went to pawn my watch,Copy !req
411. - and then I found a dead guy...
- You what?Copy !req
412. Yeah. At the pawn shop.Copy !req
413. But the next thing you know,
I'm back here at the casinoCopy !req
414. and I'm winning everything in sight.Copy !req
415. All right. Listen to me.Copy !req
416. They gave me my own room!
On the house, see?Copy !req
417. Scott, just shut up for a
second and listen to me.Copy !req
418. I want you to cash in
your chips and go home.Copy !req
419. Get in your car and leave Las Vegas.Copy !req
420. No, Tammy, no. Listen.Copy !req
421. All this happened because of you.Copy !req
422. I wanna share it with you.Copy !req
423. Scott! Oh, my God!Copy !req
424. Are you serious?Copy !req
425. Look, I got a show, I've gotta go.Copy !req
426. Just... All right, cash in the chips
and go up to your room and stay there.Copy !req
427. Don't let anybody in.
I cannot stress that enough.Copy !req
428. Nobody comes in.Copy !req
429. And keep the money right beside you.Copy !req
430. - Okay?
- Okay.Copy !req
431. When I'm done with my next show,
I'm gonna come up and we'll talk.Copy !req
432. - Okay?
- Okay.Copy !req
433. All right. I'll be
up as soon as I can.Copy !req
434. This is so great! I mean, I can't...Copy !req
435. Shh! Scott.Copy !req
436. - Are you gonna cash those in?
- Yeah.Copy !req
437. - You've done well for yourself.
- Well, it was a good night.Copy !req
438. Nope.Copy !req
439. Me shilling!Copy !req
440. A lucky sign. The gold
inside will soon be mine.Copy !req
441. Fine suit of clothes, lad.Copy !req
442. Well, thank you. Thank you very much.Copy !req
443. Those shoes, do they come in blue suede?
I really like 'em, man.Copy !req
444. Well, thank you. Thank you very much.Copy !req
445. Hey, man, you do that pretty good.
Next time, make sure you get paid for it.Copy !req
446. Hey, man, see you on the flipside.Copy !req
447. Vegas! My kind of town!Copy !req
448. Thank you. No, thank you.Copy !req
449. And now, using all my magic, I will summon
forth a member of the animal kingdom.Copy !req
450. Fazio!Copy !req
451. Of course, the casino won't
allow me to use a real bunny.Copy !req
452. Oh, my God!Copy !req
453. Hello, little one.
What an interesting costume.Copy !req
454. Watch this.Copy !req
455. Oh, shit!Copy !req
456. A little token of my esteem,
it is exactly what it seems.Copy !req
457. Made fresh daily at exactly 9:00.Copy !req
458. It comes from my shillelagh,
you can keep it in a crock.Copy !req
459. - Fazio! Just the girl I wanna see.
- Not now! Some little butthead...Copy !req
460. What is that smell? Is that my shoe?Copy !req
461. - It's not my shoe. It was in my hand!
- Oh, my God!Copy !req
462. Never mind. Have you seen that
little tramp that works for me?Copy !req
463. Tammy? Forget her. Focus on
that punk at the elevator.Copy !req
464. What about him?Copy !req
465. He just won over a hundred
thou at the roulette wheel.Copy !req
466. You're kidding me! How did you
let him get away with that much?Copy !req
467. Something went wrong.
Anyway, he still got it on him.Copy !req
468. Cash and carry.Copy !req
469. - In cash?
- He's got this gold coin I want.Copy !req
470. - Really?
- Yeah.Copy !req
471. I figured we split the green,
I get the gold coin.Copy !req
472. You know, good luck charm.Copy !req
473. What's his room number?Copy !req
474. Room service?Copy !req
475. Like taking candy from a baby.Copy !req
476. - Go, man, throw me a winner!
- Yeah!Copy !req
477. Yeah!Copy !req
478. I never lose!Copy !req
479. Hey, Tony, look what we
got here. A high roller.Copy !req
480. - Move.
- Watch it?Copy !req
481. Nice duds. What is that, lederhosen?Copy !req
482. Take a break, pal.Copy !req
483. Hey, crappier, you give me
them dice, I'm feeling lucky.Copy !req
484. But I'm not through winning, lad.Copy !req
485. Get outta here.Copy !req
486. Looks like a slot machine!Copy !req
487. You wanna try your luck?Copy !req
488. This is my kind of place,
crooked and sleazy,Copy !req
489. stealing gold from
humans is awfully easy.Copy !req
490. Look out, Vegas. I'm taking over.Copy !req
491. Money, money, money, money...Copy !req
492. It's good!Copy !req
493. Money, money is good.Copy !req
494. Money.Copy !req
495. That's silk. I'll keep that.Copy !req
496. Hey!Copy !req
497. What are you doing in my room?Copy !req
498. Ow!Copy !req
499. Room service.Copy !req
500. - What the hell...
- Now, me boyo,Copy !req
501. I smell me shilling.Copy !req
502. Tell me where it is or
there'll be another killing.Copy !req
503. What the hell are you?Copy !req
504. I'm a leprechaun,
come to claim me gold.Copy !req
505. Yeah, give me hotel security.Copy !req
506. Yeah, I'd like to report a
leprechaun in your hotel.Copy !req
507. No, a leprechaun.Copy !req
508. Yeah, a little green guy.Copy !req
509. He tried to kill me!Copy !req
510. Hello?Copy !req
511. The coin. The bastard took my coin.Copy !req
512. Next time, I'll take the elevator!Copy !req
513. I have been looking
all over hell for you.Copy !req
514. - You got the coin?
- Yes, I got the coin.Copy !req
515. I didn't find any money.Copy !req
516. - Gimme!
- Forget it! We're splitting it 50-50.Copy !req
517. We made a deal,
that coin belongs to me.Copy !req
518. Yeah. Well, I didn't get the money,
so now we're splitting it.Copy !req
519. We are not gonna sell it, you putz!Copy !req
520. It's got powers.Copy !req
521. What are you talking about?
What kind of powers?Copy !req
522. Put it on the table,
you're not gonna believe this.Copy !req
523. It's amazing.Copy !req
524. Go on. Go on.Copy !req
525. - I can't, it's magically disappeared.
- "It's magic..."Copy !req
526. - Put it on the table!
- All right. What number?Copy !req
527. - Just any one! Any one!
- Eleven black.Copy !req
528. I don't get it.Copy !req
529. Get what? Are you losing your mind?Copy !req
530. It moves. It moves to the
winning number by itself.Copy !req
531. Oh, I see. It moves to the winning
number by itself, which means thatCopy !req
532. you're nuts!Copy !req
533. Look, I gotta go do my show.Copy !req
534. I want you to find a coin dealer,
get it appraised and we will sell it.Copy !req
535. I swear, on my
mother's grave, it has magic.Copy !req
536. Loretta, darling, if you
want magic, bend over.Copy !req
537. I'll pull a rabbit out of your ass.Copy !req
538. In the meantime, do what I
tell you. I'll see you tonight.Copy !req
539. Fazio!Copy !req
540. I know you've got
work to do backstage.Copy !req
541. I'm gone.Copy !req
542. He's gone.Copy !req
543. - Did you get my money back yet?
- I'm working on it.Copy !req
544. - What is that?
- That is mine!Copy !req
545. That looks like gold to me.
Give me it.Copy !req
546. - I said give me it!
- That is my personal property!Copy !req
547. I'm gonna keep this until you
get my money back for me.Copy !req
548. That's my personal property.
I want it back!Copy !req
549. Would you keep your voice down?Copy !req
550. One thing I can't stand is a
fat broad with a big mouth.Copy !req
551. Who's calling fat fat, Mr. Porker?Copy !req
552. Oh, really!Copy !req
553. Yeah, really. You couldn't get a
woman if your life depended on it.Copy !req
554. Oh, yeah? I could have
any broad that I want.Copy !req
555. Like that bubblehead
little bimbo, Miss Tammy?Copy !req
556. Yeah, I could have
Tammy if I wanted her.Copy !req
557. - Ha! You wish!
- Yeah.Copy !req
558. I wish!Copy !req
559. What was that?Copy !req
560. Mmm...Copy !req
561. If wishes were horses, a fat man like
you couldn't even get in the saddle.Copy !req
562. - Mitch! Mitch.
- Tammy, what's the matter?Copy !req
563. - I want you.
- You do?Copy !req
564. I want you more than any man
I've ever known in my life.Copy !req
565. Have you got a fever?Copy !req
566. Oh, right now, Mitch! Take me!Copy !req
567. Take me right here! On the floor!Copy !req
568. Yes!Copy !req
569. Fatso, huh?Copy !req
570. Well, look, whatever it is,
don't change a thing.Copy !req
571. - Now you just stay like this.
- Oh, yes!Copy !req
572. - Come on, let's go to my room.
- Yes.Copy !req
573. Mandatory drug testing
for all employees, that's it.Copy !req
574. - Mitchy, Mitchy...
- Yeah. We'll go right to my room.Copy !req
575. - All this time, Mitchy.
- Boy, am I ready!Copy !req
576. I'm going to start pumping now.Copy !req
577. I don't look it, but I
can get really nasty!Copy !req
578. - You can?
- Yeah!Copy !req
579. Then you just do it.Copy !req
580. - Do I have permission?
- Yeah.Copy !req
581. - Come on, baby!
- Yeah!Copy !req
582. Wait a minute. That's what he said.Copy !req
583. "I wish."Copy !req
584. Oh, Mitchy, where have
you been all my life?Copy !req
585. I've been right here,
baby, waiting for you.Copy !req
586. Gimme a kiss!Copy !req
587. Mitchy.Copy !req
588. I like my loving the
same way I like my men.Copy !req
589. - Tough.
- Tough?Copy !req
590. And hard, like this.Copy !req
591. Ow!Copy !req
592. Ooh, that's wonderful!Copy !req
593. I wanna make you feel it, like this.Copy !req
594. - You're turning me on!
- I am?Copy !req
595. I think I got the idea.Copy !req
596. - Let me do it for you.
- Okay. Okay.Copy !req
597. - You like that?
- Oh, Mitchy! Yeah!Copy !req
598. Ooh! I love it!Copy !req
599. Now, can we... Can we do it?Copy !req
600. My boxers keep crawling up my butt.Copy !req
601. I hate that. I go with Jockeys now.Copy !req
602. Yeah. You know,
makes me feel like a sissy.Copy !req
603. Yeah.Copy !req
604. You can't hang like
you really want to.Copy !req
605. - How do you want it hanging?
- Loose. I wanna be comfortable.Copy !req
606. - I like a little support.
- Yeah? Feels good.Copy !req
607. - How's my tie look?
- Fine. Good.Copy !req
608. - My socks are hanging down on my ankles.
- I hate that.Copy !req
609. I wear those ones come
over the calves, like tubers.Copy !req
610. Yeah. I'd get those garters,
but they make me feel like a sissy.Copy !req
611. Where the hell is that guy?Copy !req
612. Enough with the pain.
Okay, no more pain.Copy !req
613. Sweetie, mama's gonna
make you feel so good!Copy !req
614. Well, good is good, pain is...Copy !req
615. What tasteful decor!Copy !req
616. Mitchy, it's like a museum.Copy !req
617. - Let's do it. Let's do it!
- Mitchy!Copy !req
618. - What? This is good.
- Down, boy.Copy !req
619. - Now, first...
- First what?Copy !req
620. - I'm gonna make you hot.
- Yes, I like that.Copy !req
621. - And then...
- What?Copy !req
622. I'm gonna make you burn.Copy !req
623. Burn?Copy !req
624. Oh, boy!Copy !req
625. That's very nice.Copy !req
626. That's nice. That's good. Yes.Copy !req
627. Take it all off.Copy !req
628. Do it. Do it. Yes!Copy !req
629. You got real talent.Copy !req
630. Ooh!Copy !req
631. Yes!Copy !req
632. Have I got a wish for you!Copy !req
633. - Mitch?
- Come and get me, baby.Copy !req
634. What did you do to me?
How did you get me here?Copy !req
635. - Hey, wait!
- How did I get here?Copy !req
636. It's me, remember?
The love machine! Come on!Copy !req
637. Get away from me! You letch!Copy !req
638. You bitch! You ball-breaking tease!Copy !req
639. You're fired as of tonight!Copy !req
640. You're finished in show business.Copy !req
641. You'll never get a job
in this town again.Copy !req
642. Belongs to me, this gold I smell.Copy !req
643. Whoever's got it is going to hell.Copy !req
644. Potatoes!Copy !req
645. I was gonna make her a star.Copy !req
646. All she had to do was cooperate.Copy !req
647. What the hell is going on?Copy !req
648. What channel is this?Copy !req
649. What do you need her for,
Mitch, when you can have me?Copy !req
650. She called me Mitch?Copy !req
651. Take a look at these, Mitch.Copy !req
652. Coincidence.Copy !req
653. I like this.Copy !req
654. Here you go!Copy !req
655. Baked potato, broiled potato,
French fries, potato skins, potato saladCopy !req
656. and six potato pancakes.Copy !req
657. Anything else?Copy !req
658. There once was a lady of Totten,Copy !req
659. whose taste grew
perverted and rotten,Copy !req
660. she cared not for steaks
or for pastries and cakes,Copy !req
661. but lived upon penis au gratin.Copy !req
662. Metallica!Copy !req
663. No, wait!Copy !req
664. White Zombie. I've got the album.Copy !req
665. Enjoy your spuds!Copy !req
666. What the hell did I just say?Copy !req
667. I'm coming for you, Mitch!Copy !req
668. I must be dreaming.Copy !req
669. I'm coming.Copy !req
670. - Come on, baby.
- I can't wait to reach you.Copy !req
671. Well, come and get me.Copy !req
672. Oh. Oh!Copy !req
673. - I must be dreaming.
- No.Copy !req
674. - I'm not dreaming?
- No.Copy !req
675. - This is nice. This is good.
- Mitch.Copy !req
676. What can I do for you?
Where did you come from?Copy !req
677. - I'll show you.
- What's the difference?Copy !req
678. Hey, you want my heat-seeking
moisture missile, don't you?Copy !req
679. What a lovely treat for
a fine lad like meself.Copy !req
680. What's wrong with me?
Why am I talking like that?Copy !req
681. - Hey, rich kid.
- Loretta!Copy !req
682. Eating up all your winnings already.Copy !req
683. Where's Tammy? Have you seen her?Copy !req
684. She's up in Mitch's office
getting her clock cleaned.Copy !req
685. - What?
- Life's a bitch, ain't it?Copy !req
686. - Where's Mitch's office?
- Third floor, Room 318.Copy !req
687. Elevator left, then a right.
Bon appétit.Copy !req
688. That's the freak that
broke into my room.Copy !req
689. Yeah, baby!Copy !req
690. Feeling sick? Stubbed your toe?
Call this lawyer. I'll fix your woe.Copy !req
691. Agony is my business.
I'll fight for you!Copy !req
692. Even you, Mitch.Copy !req
693. Excuse me.Copy !req
694. Did you... Did you hear
my name mentioned?Copy !req
695. - No.
- Good!Copy !req
696. - Tammy. Are you all right?
- Stay away from me!Copy !req
697. - What happened? What's wrong?
- Nothing happened. Nothing's wrong.Copy !req
698. Just business as usual.Copy !req
699. What did he do to you?
Tell me what he did.Copy !req
700. It's what he tried to do, okay?Copy !req
701. It's not like this is the first time
this has happened to me.Copy !req
702. It's just that this time, along
with everything else, I got fired.Copy !req
703. So let's just forget it.Copy !req
704. No. I'm not gonna forget it.
And neither are you.Copy !req
705. If we let him get away with it,
he'll do it again to somebody else.Copy !req
706. And I don't know about you,
but I'm not gonna let that happen.Copy !req
707. Praise the Lord!Copy !req
708. And send in your money!Copy !req
709. Otherwise, you're all doomed
to hellfire and damnationCopy !req
710. for fornicatin' with
the devil's harlot.Copy !req
711. Especially you, Mitch.
You're a prime offender.Copy !req
712. - That just sounded like my name.
- No.Copy !req
713. - No?
- No.Copy !req
714. The signs point to a
tragedy about to happen.Copy !req
715. Casino owner diesCopy !req
716. in a bed of lies.Copy !req
717. - That was my name, right?
- Yes!Copy !req
718. Oh, shit.Copy !req
719. What the hell is happening here?Copy !req
720. No, no! You freak. Get off of me!Copy !req
721. Oh!Copy !req
722. Where the hell is that asshole?
Come on!Copy !req
723. A dream. This is a bad dream.Copy !req
724. You'll get what's due
when I electrocute you!Copy !req
725. Scott, um...Copy !req
726. Thank you.Copy !req
727. - Mitch.
- Sir?Copy !req
728. My God!Copy !req
729. Oh, Scott!Copy !req
730. Where's me shilling?Copy !req
731. - You again?
- What?Copy !req
732. Now, me boyo, it's time
to cut you down to size.Copy !req
733. Who are you?Copy !req
734. Let's get out of here.Copy !req
735. Mitch, I want my money,
and I want my money now.Copy !req
736. What the hell's going on here?Copy !req
737. You're in a lot of trouble, pal.Copy !req
738. - Out of me way!
- Hey! Stay there.Copy !req
739. I know you. You're that
guy from the craps table.Copy !req
740. You know, you really ought to go
see a dermatologist or something.Copy !req
741. That's really bad.Copy !req
742. Beauty is in the eye of the beholder.Copy !req
743. That really hurt.Copy !req
744. We dance.Copy !req
745. Tell me, what was Judy
Garland really like?Copy !req
746. They should have been willing
to give me me shilling.Copy !req
747. But I've done well by
sending them to hell!Copy !req
748. What are we gonna do?
He's a monster.Copy !req
749. Nobody's gonna believe us if
we tell them what we've seen!Copy !req
750. Scott, what's wrong?Copy !req
751. I don't know.Copy !req
752. My insides. It's like
everything's twisted up.Copy !req
753. - Oh, my God!
- What is it? What's wrong?Copy !req
754. - Your face!
- I'm in trouble, Tammy.Copy !req
755. Help me!Copy !req
756. Scott, we gotta get out of here.Copy !req
757. Like you said,
who's gonna believe us?Copy !req
758. I don't know...Copy !req
759. That's where it all happened.Copy !req
760. - Where?
- At the pawn shop across the street.Copy !req
761. That's where I found the coin.
I think that's where the answer is.Copy !req
762. Let's go check it out.Copy !req
763. I smell me shilling.Copy !req
764. And the gentle fragrance
of a lady's perfume.Copy !req
765. Let it work,
let it work, let it work.Copy !req
766. Let me be beautiful.Copy !req
767. Give me the body of
a stacked 20-year-old.Copy !req
768. Please.Copy !req
769. I wanna be sexyCopy !req
770. and beautiful again.Copy !req
771. I wish.Copy !req
772. Oh! Yeah!Copy !req
773. Enter.Copy !req
774. Loretta?Copy !req
775. That's right, sweetheart.Copy !req
776. Little ol' me.Copy !req
777. Didn't I tell you one of these
days I was gonna turn it around?Copy !req
778. - But how?
- Magic.Copy !req
779. All I had to do was wish for it.Copy !req
780. Pretty. Yours?Copy !req
781. Man, oh, man, oh, mano-schewitz!Copy !req
782. Look at those tits!Copy !req
783. I wish I was a man so I could just
screw myself right to the floor.Copy !req
784. And I dare you to feel
that ass, Fazio. That's prime.Copy !req
785. - All you had to do was wish for it?
- You got it!Copy !req
786. - Thanks!
- You! Give that back to me!Copy !req
787. You give it back!
Give it back right now!Copy !req
788. Thanks for the loan,
Loretta. I owe you.Copy !req
789. You flaming faggola!Copy !req
790. But since there's a
mirror in the room,Copy !req
791. I might as well just stick
around and enjoy it.Copy !req
792. All right, this had better work.Copy !req
793. I wish...Copy !req
794. I wish that I was the greatest
magician in the world!Copy !req
795. I am just so damn gorgeous.Copy !req
796. They're gonna want me like they
never wanted anybody before.Copy !req
797. And I'm gonna make 'em pay.Copy !req
798. Who the hell are you?Copy !req
799. I'm a leprechaun, me lass,
and I'm gonna make you pay.Copy !req
800. What do you want?Copy !req
801. Your boobs are big, your butt is small,
but still you're in for quite a fall.Copy !req
802. - What are you talking about?
- What, didn't you hear?Copy !req
803. Bigger is good, but jumbo is dear.Copy !req
804. I'll give you boobs
that come out to here.Copy !req
805. My babies!Copy !req
806. What are you doing to my babies?Copy !req
807. Those delightful lips,
they'll get you some tips.Copy !req
808. But what about these?
Aren't they big enough to please?Copy !req
809. No! What are you doing?Copy !req
810. A delightful little slut.
But what about your butt?Copy !req
811. You little monster!Copy !req
812. Oh, my God!Copy !req
813. Feels like rain!Copy !req
814. Now that was quite a
load to have to explode.Copy !req
815. What a lovely lass.
I had to blow up your ass.Copy !req
816. But now I must hit the road.Copy !req
817. That's where I found
the poor guy lying.Copy !req
818. - And you think the leprechaun did it?
- Who else?Copy !req
819. Now, there was something on the
computer about gold coins and wishes.Copy !req
820. Finding the leprechaun's
gold is hard to do.Copy !req
821. He sometimes keeps it in his hat,
or hides it in the loo.Copy !req
822. That's a big help.Copy !req
823. If you destroy his gold,
you destroy the leprechaun,Copy !req
824. but mortals can never
resist the power of gold.Copy !req
825. To them, being rich is more important
than doing what needs to be done.Copy !req
826. No way. We find that gold,
we're getting rid of it.Copy !req
827. - Oh, no! How can you say that, darling?
- What?Copy !req
828. I didn't say that. Did I?Copy !req
829. Oh!Copy !req
830. What's wrong?Copy !req
831. Get it out of sight!Copy !req
832. - What is it?
- Just get it out!Copy !req
833. Okay. Is that better?Copy !req
834. Yeah. I'm okay, I...Copy !req
835. I feel so weird.Copy !req
836. Look, Scott, I think we should just
get in your car and get out of here,Copy !req
837. - while we still can.
- I can't.Copy !req
838. You need to see a doctor.Copy !req
839. Not yet.Copy !req
840. There's something here,
something I need or want very badly.Copy !req
841. I don't know what it is.Copy !req
842. Maybe you should go.Copy !req
843. No way. I'm not leaving you, Scott.Copy !req
844. Wow!Copy !req
845. Look at all this stuff.Copy !req
846. Yeah, it's like a junkyard in here.Copy !req
847. Spooky.Copy !req
848. What exactly are we looking for?Copy !req
849. I'm not sure. Some clue as
to what happened to me.Copy !req
850. Wait here, darlin'.
I think I'm onto somethin'.Copy !req
851. I can smell it!Copy !req
852. Delicious!Copy !req
853. Ah!Copy !req
854. Isn't it lovely?Copy !req
855. A pot of gold for the taking.Copy !req
856. - Scott, you found it!
- Aye, that I did!Copy !req
857. We can destroy it.
Remember what the computer said?Copy !req
858. If we destroy the gold, we get rid
of the leprechaun once and for all.Copy !req
859. - Destroy it?
- Yeah! We have to.Copy !req
860. No, lass. We need to study it.Copy !req
861. Aye. We need to look at
what jingles and jangles.Copy !req
862. For science, you know,
is the study of angles.Copy !req
863. Scott! What is happening?Copy !req
864. Nothing. Nothing, my beauty,
nothing at all. I'm just being sensible.Copy !req
865. No, you're not!Copy !req
866. Don't take a leprechaun's gold!Copy !req
867. Not if you want to live
to be ripe and old.Copy !req
868. - You're hurting me!
- Am I?Copy !req
869. Wow.Copy !req
870. What happened?Copy !req
871. I don't know, but don't let it happen again,
because you're scaring me to death.Copy !req
872. If anyone's scared to death,
then it'll be me doing the scaring.Copy !req
873. What...Copy !req
874. I don't like what I'm seeing.Copy !req
875. Two leprechauns is one too many, lad.Copy !req
876. Scott! The gold! The gold!
Make a wish. Wish him dead.Copy !req
877. All right, little monster!Copy !req
878. I wish you were encased in cement
at the bottom of the ocean!Copy !req
879. Oh, no, please! Anything but that!Copy !req
880. Ya silly little twit!Copy !req
881. Have you forgotten the charm?Copy !req
882. A leprechaun's gold
can do him no harm.Copy !req
883. Scott!Copy !req
884. So, for pulling this trick,
I'll chop off your dick!Copy !req
885. Oh, me little darling!Copy !req
886. - Nice pitch.
- Come on!Copy !req
887. I pitch for the Vegas All-Stars.Copy !req
888. Oh, me achin' noggin!Copy !req
889. When I catch up with those two
I'll give them a good scragging.Copy !req
890. - Oh, no, Scott! Starting again?
- Yeah.Copy !req
891. My insides...Copy !req
892. I feel like I'm being torn apart.Copy !req
893. Oh, no!Copy !req
894. Scott, we're going
to the hospital now!Copy !req
895. Get in!Copy !req
896. You can run, me boyo,
but you can't hide!Copy !req
897. Scott!Copy !req
898. - What happened?
- He bit me.Copy !req
899. At the casino.Copy !req
900. Miss! Miss!Copy !req
901. Jesus Christ!Copy !req
902. - Can we get some help here?
- What's the trouble here?Copy !req
903. What the hell is this?Copy !req
904. Get me a gurney.
Get this man into isolation, stat!Copy !req
905. Come on!Copy !req
906. - Just wait here, miss.
- No, I wanna be with him.Copy !req
907. Nobody's gonna be with him until
we know what the problem is.Copy !req
908. Oh, God!Copy !req
909. - Get out of the road!
- Eat it.Copy !req
910. Looks like some kind of virulent fungus.
I've never seen anything like it.Copy !req
911. Must be metastasizing
down the right quadrant,Copy !req
912. moving into the lower thoracic area.Copy !req
913. Let's get this man on
antibiotics right away!Copy !req
914. Hold him, for God's sake! Hold him!Copy !req
915. Take it easy, son.
We're here to help.Copy !req
916. Give him another sedative, damn it!Copy !req
917. Now listen to me!Copy !req
918. This may mean the difference
between living and dying.Copy !req
919. Do you have health insurance?Copy !req
920. Do you take Green Cross?Copy !req
921. Good God!Copy !req
922. Forktus glottis!Copy !req
923. What the hell is taking them so long?Copy !req
924. Tammy Larsen,
please report to the morgue.Copy !req
925. Oh, no!Copy !req
926. Tammy Larsen,
please report to the morgue.Copy !req
927. Doctor, look at this!Copy !req
928. - That's his blood?
- What the hell is going on?Copy !req
929. Bring me his encephalogram.Copy !req
930. Really?Copy !req
931. Where's his EKG?Copy !req
932. If this is some sort of joke,
I don't find it at all amusing.Copy !req
933. Well, maybe he doesn't
need health insurance.Copy !req
934. Wow! Should I order a
few more tests, Doctor?Copy !req
935. Well, let's see...Copy !req
936. He can afford an MRI, and let's
give him a couple more EKGs,Copy !req
937. - and he can use a spinal tap.
- Maybe a bone scan?Copy !req
938. All right. Let's just start with every
test that begins with the letter A,Copy !req
939. - tomorrow we'll do the B's and Thursday...
- You play golf on Thursday.Copy !req
940. Well, this is an emergency.Copy !req
941. Hello?Copy !req
942. Hello?Copy !req
943. Is anybody here?Copy !req
944. Hello?Copy !req
945. Hello? Sir?Copy !req
946. Excuse me?Copy !req
947. Sir?Copy !req
948. Excuse me, sir...Copy !req
949. Oh, God! No!Copy !req
950. Let me go, you son of a bitch!Copy !req
951. Now, that's no way to speak about
me mother, bless her greedy soul.Copy !req
952. Now, me boyos, I'll be checking out!Copy !req
953. Take care of the patient!Copy !req
954. An angel of mercy!Copy !req
955. Nurse! Sedate this patient!Copy !req
956. Ah!Copy !req
957. Now that's what I call
managed health care.Copy !req
958. What's that I smell?Copy !req
959. Would it be me brother from hell?Copy !req
960. Right. Now that you're in place,
I'll slice up your face.Copy !req
961. Oh, no! Scott!
Scott, help me! Please!Copy !req
962. Now don't be afraid, lass.
I'll only remove the front part.Copy !req
963. Oh, no, please!Copy !req
964. I want me shilling!Copy !req
965. I don't have it.
I swear, I don't have it.Copy !req
966. What a pity.Copy !req
967. Wait. I don't suppose you want that nose...
There will be no charge for removing it.Copy !req
968. No! No! No!Copy !req
969. Cut her nose and I'll
hack off your toes!Copy !req
970. Back off, you renegade,
before I make you eat that blade!Copy !req
971. Power to power, you've much to learn,Copy !req
972. taller or shorter,
I'll make you burn.Copy !req
973. Oh!Copy !req
974. Now where's me shilling?Copy !req
975. Fazio's the one with your shilling!
It's him you should be killing!Copy !req
976. Fazio's magic, pathetic and lame,Copy !req
977. will soon turn tragic
and me shilling I'll claim!Copy !req
978. Leave him alone.
You've got what you want.Copy !req
979. No, me dear, you shall not pass.
I'll raise me boot and kick your...Copy !req
980. Put it away!Copy !req
981. Ladies and gentlemen,
The Burning Beauty!Copy !req
982. A new illusion I have just developed!Copy !req
983. Now, for the first time on any stage,Copy !req
984. our lovely volunteer
from the audienceCopy !req
985. trapped inside a burning hell.Copy !req
986. Will she come out alive?Copy !req
987. Or medium-well?Copy !req
988. He's going after the shilling.Copy !req
989. Fazio has it.Copy !req
990. I've got to destroy
him to save meself.Copy !req
991. Is that possible? Will that work?Copy !req
992. I feel it. I'm part
of whatever he is.Copy !req
993. Well, maybe we won't
have to destroy him.Copy !req
994. If we can find the shilling,
we can wish you back to normal.Copy !req
995. Listen to me. I don't want
you going in with me.Copy !req
996. When we get to the casino,
you drop me off.Copy !req
997. I want you to get out of there.
Go someplace. Someplace safe.Copy !req
998. No!Copy !req
999. We started this together.Copy !req
1000. We're gonna finish it that way.Copy !req
1001. And now, a word of warning.Copy !req
1002. If any of you in the audience
are the least bit squeamish,Copy !req
1003. I suggest you leave the theater.Copy !req
1004. Fazio's illusions
are very, very real!Copy !req
1005. - Who the hell are you?
- No reason for alarm.Copy !req
1006. Just give me the coin and
you'll come to no harm.Copy !req
1007. It'd be a cold day in hell
before I give up this coin, pal,Copy !req
1008. so why don't you take a
hike before I call security?Copy !req
1009. You're making a mistake.
As a magician, you're a pathetic fake.Copy !req
1010. Scott, hang on! We're almost there!Copy !req
1011. Hang on!Copy !req
1012. Get me out of this thing.
Do you hear me? Get me out!Copy !req
1013. A pleasure it'll be to get
you out, and set you freeCopy !req
1014. with this!Copy !req
1015. With Fazio the Great,
we've had a good laugh.Copy !req
1016. Shall I start up this saw
and cut him in half?Copy !req
1017. Yeah or nay?Copy !req
1018. Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes!Copy !req
1019. - No!
- Yes, yes, yes, yes!Copy !req
1020. No, no, no!Copy !req
1021. My audience, no! No, you love me!
You love me! No!Copy !req
1022. I can't hear you, me dears!Copy !req
1023. No!Copy !req
1024. Oh, no!Copy !req
1025. Now, me boyo, where's me shilling?Copy !req
1026. You're bluffing! There's a
whole room full of witnesses.Copy !req
1027. Oh, too bad!Copy !req
1028. Forcing me to split in two a
nice young lad such as you.Copy !req
1029. I wish I was in Caesar's
Palace right now!Copy !req
1030. No, lad. You've had your wish.Copy !req
1031. Now I'll have mine.Copy !req
1032. This way!Copy !req
1033. Caesar's Palace...Copy !req
1034. Listen to me, everybody!
This man's a maniac.Copy !req
1035. For your own safety,
get out of the room!Copy !req
1036. Come on, everybody, out, hurry!Copy !req
1037. Out!Copy !req
1038. Hurry, hurry! Oh, God!Copy !req
1039. Scott! The shilling!
I wish Scott was...Copy !req
1040. No wish for you, darling.
Now I'll peel you like a grape.Copy !req
1041. Hold it!Copy !req
1042. Now wait, lad. What are
you doing? We're brothers.Copy !req
1043. I don't think so.Copy !req
1044. Scott, come over to the
green side. I'll make you rich.Copy !req
1045. - There it is, yours for the taking.
- You'll share nothing!Copy !req
1046. I know how you are,
you're only bluffing.Copy !req
1047. Trust me, lad, one devilish
creature to another.Copy !req
1048. That's me boy. We're alike, me and you.
Evil as hell all the way through.Copy !req
1049. No, Scott!Copy !req
1050. He's not like you!Copy !req
1051. Don't listen to him.Copy !req
1052. She's right!Copy !req
1053. I'm not like you.
I'll never be like you!Copy !req
1054. Put it down, lad, you can't hurt me.
You should know that by now.Copy !req
1055. Think of the gold, Scott,
the power it can give you.Copy !req
1056. The gold, Scott.
His power lies in the gold.Copy !req
1057. We'll share it, I promise.Copy !req
1058. Share this, pal!Copy !req
1059. No, not me gold!Copy !req
1060. Scott! Scott!Copy !req
1061. Oh, my God! You're back!Copy !req
1062. You're normal again.Copy !req
1063. I can't believe it!Copy !req
1064. I can't wait to get out of here
and leave this nightmare behind.Copy !req
1065. Well, we won't be
leaving it all behind.Copy !req
1066. What do you mean?Copy !req
1067. I found this.Copy !req
1068. What do you think?Copy !req
1069. We can have just about
anything we want.Copy !req
1070. It's your call.Copy !req
1071. I don't know, I think I
have everything I want.Copy !req
1072. You know something, sweetheart?Copy !req
1073. This could be the beginning
of a beautiful friendship.Copy !req