1. HEY, WELCOME BACK, MAX.
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2. THOUGHT YOU'D GET AWAY
FROM US, HUH? LET GO OF ME!
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3. DON'T TELL ME THIS IS
NOTHING ABOUT LUNCH MONEY.
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4. IT'S A MATH PROBLEM. IF
WE TOOK ALL THE DOUGH...
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5. FROM A DORK ON THE
FLOOR, WOULD IT BE ENOUGH?
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6. TWO DOLLARS AND SEVENTY CENTS?
WE'RE GONNA BE LIVING LARGE ON THIS.
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7. IF YOU GUYS WANT A REAL SCORE... YEAH?
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8. IT'S THE WHOLESALE
MART. FIFTH AND BROADWAY.
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9. ROLEXES, GOLD CHAINS, WHO KNOWS WHAT.
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10. THIRD AISLE, LOCKER 882, UPSTAIRS.
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11. AND ALL YOU NEED IS... THIS.
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12. WE'LL BE IN TOUCH. LATER... LOSER.
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13. COME ON, MAN. COME ON, MAN. WHAT A WUSS!
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14. ANOTHER ALIEN ABDUCTION, MAXWELL?
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15. THEY WANTED MY OPTIC LOBES,
BUT THEY DIDN'T GET A THING.
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16. THE KEY TO THE SUPPLY
CLOSET, MAXWELL. THE KEY?
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17. TO THE SUPPLY CLOSET.
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18. OH, I LEFT IT IN THE DOOR, MRS. DUKE.
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19. AND YOU ALSO LEFT US WITHOUT ENOUGH
TIME TO HEAR YOUR LITTLE PRESENTATION.
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20. BUT I WANT TO HEAR IT ANYWAY,
RIGHT HERE AFTER SCHOOL!
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21. I'M HOME! DON'T TELL ME.
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22. YOU WERE KIDNAPPED BY
GYPSIES AND SOLD TO THE CIRCUS.
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23. HEY, CAN I HELP IT IF MRS. DUKE IS REALLY A
VERY ANGRY MAN TRAPPED IN A WOMAN'S BODY?
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24. OH, I SEE. ANOTHER HOMEWORK MALFUNCTION.
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25. AND, GOSH, WHAT A SURPRISE, DETENTION.
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26. BUT, YOU KNOW, THE ONLY GOOD NEWS IS...
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27. YOU WEREN'T HERE...
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28. WHEN WE WERE ROBBED.
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29. WHAT KIND OF MANIAC WOULD
STEAL THE MOTOR TO OUR HOOVER?
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30. YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO COME HOME
TODAY AND HELP ME CLEAN UP, REMEMBER?
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31. - IT'S JUST TRAVIS.
- WHAT IS THAT SUPPOSED TO MEAN?
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32. YOU TOLD ME, MEN ARE LIKE BUSES.
THERE'S ALWAYS ANOTHER ONE.
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33. I NEVER SAID...
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34. YOU KNOW THAT THIS IS THE ONLY
DAY THAT I DON'T WORK A DOUBLE SHIFT,
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35. AND I REALLY WANTED THE
HOUSE TO LOOK NICE FOR TRAVIS.
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36. MOM, IT'S NOT LIKE HE
LIVES HERE OR ANYTHING.
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37. YOUR FEET? WHAT IS THIS?
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38. WHAT IS THIS? HUH? WHAT HAVE
YOU GOT HERE, DREADLOCKS? OW.
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39. NO, WAIT, LOOK. IT'S A
TINY, LIVING CREATURE.
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40. WHO PUT A SQUIRREL IN YOUR SHORTS? MAX...
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41. - TRY AND LOOK LIKE THIS GUY.
- I HATE THAT PICTURE.
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42. MAX, WE HAVE TO TALK.
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43. HEY, GUYS. OH, HEY. WE'RE IN HERE.
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44. LOOKING GOOD, MAX.
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45. YOU'RE NOT LOOKING SO BAD EITHER.
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46. MAX, YOU EVER HEAR OF A
GUY NAMED BUSTER KEATON?
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47. ISN'T HE SOME DEAD
BLACK-AND-WHITE GUY? APPARENTLY.
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48. BUT HE'S A VERY FUNNY DEAD
GUY. YOU TELL HIM? TELL ME WHAT?
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49. HELLO?
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50. MAX, UM...
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51. TRAVIS AND I... WANT TO GET ENGAGED.
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52. I THOUGHT HE WAS JUST COMING OVER FOR RIBS.
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53. WE WANTED TO WAIT 'TIL ALL
OF THE PAPERS WERE SIGNED.
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54. "PAPERS"? THE DIVORCE PAPERS.
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55. THERE WERE SOME THINGS
LEFT UNSIGNED BY YOUR FATHER.
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56. MY FATHER? BUT I THOUGHT
YOU DIDN'T KNOW WHERE HE WAS.
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57. I DIDN'T. LISTEN, MAX,
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58. WHAT MATTERS NOW IS YOU AND YOUR
MOM CAN MOVE ON WITH YOUR LIVES.
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59. - THAT'S WHY WE WANT TO GET ENGAGED.
- WAIT, WHAT ABOUT ME?
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60. WHY DIDN'T YOU ASK ME? MAX...
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61. WHAT ABOUT ME?
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62. MAX.
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63. WELL... NOW HE KNOWS.
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64. HEY, I WANT TO TALK TO YOU!
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65. GET HIM! COME ON, MAN! COME ON!
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66. COME ON! GET OVER HERE, MAN!
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67. - YEAH, GO GET HIM!
- WATCH IT!
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68. HEY, COME HERE, YOU LITTLE CON ARTIST!
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69. THERE ARE NO GOLD
WATCHES, NO GOLD NECKLACES!
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70. WE'LL GET YA! WE GOT HIM NOW!
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71. UNDERSTAND... YOU'RE
MESSING WITH MY LITTLE BROTHER.
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72. DON'T TELL ME. THEY COULDN'T
FIT THE KEY IN THE LOCK?
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73. THERE WERE NO LOCKERS.
AND YOUR MAP WAS CRAP.
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74. SO THERE'S ONLY ONE
PLACE THIS THING'S GONNA FIT.
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75. AND IT AIN'T MRS. DUKE'S SUPPLY CLOSET.
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76. COME ON!
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77. WHERE YOU GOING?
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78. HEY, WHAT ARE YOU KIDS DOING IN THERE?
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79. GET OUTTA THERE!
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80. WHERE'D HE GO?
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81. GO! I'M GOING AROUND!
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82. GO AROUND! LET'S GO!
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83. LET'S GET HIM, BOYS!
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84. OH, NO!
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85. COME ON. WE GOT HIM NOW.
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86. HI. YOU LITTLE TURD!
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87. YOU THINK YOU GOT SKILLS?
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88. CAN WE JUST PRETEND THIS NEVER HAPPENED?
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89. WHO... DARE TO WAKE ME?
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90. AIN'T GONNA MAKE THIS A MYSTERY.
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91. DON'T WANNA DO TIME ON YOUR WISHES THREE.
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92. WATCH IT, BOY! YOU DON'T WANT TO DIS ME!
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93. OR I'll DISH OUT MY MISERY.
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94. NOW, WHO'S THAT SORRY
WANNA-BE THAT DISTURBED MY Z's?
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95. LET'S GET OUTTA HERE! GO ON! GO, GO!
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96. GET OUT OF MY WAY!
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97. IF YOU WANT TO BE NUMBER ONE,
I'M SORRY, BOY, THAT'S BEEN DONE!
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98. BUT IF YOU GOT THE ITCHES
FOR A SACK OF RICHES,
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99. DON'T MATTER HOW AVARICIOUS,
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100. I'M THE MAN THAT COULD GRANT YOUR WISHES!
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101. HEY, DON'T TURN YOUR BUTT ON ME!
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102. I'M THE MAN OF THE AGES,
STRAIGHT OUT OF THE PAGES!
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103. HANG ON! I'M CONTAGIOUS,
OUTRAGEOUS, SPONTANEOUS!
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104. YOU CAN'T CONTAIN THIS!
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105. I AM KAZAAM!
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106. I'M REALLY HAPPY FOR YOU.
WHERE DO YOU THINK YOU'RE GOING?
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107. MAKE YOUR THREE WISHES, AND I'M OUT OF YOUR
FACE, BACK IN MY BOX AND OUT OF THIS PLACE.
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108. LISTEN, MR. PSYCHOPATHIC
DORK IN THE BASEMENT,
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109. I DON'T THINK YOU'RE ORDERING ANYBODY!
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110. DO YOU REALIZE WHO I AM? I'M YOUR GENIE!
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111. IN THAT CASE, I WISH I WAS AS
BIG AS YOU, BUT NOT SO STUPID.
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112. THAT'S NOT A WISH! THAT'S AN INSULT!
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113. BESIDES, I DON'T DO THOSE KIND
OF WISHES. I DO MATERIAL WISHES.
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114. SEE? THINGS. STUFF. YOU
GOTTA WANT SOMETHING, KID.
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115. LISTEN, YOU WANT TO PULL THE WOOL OVER
SOMEONE'S EYES? GO GET A SHEEP, OKAY?
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116. LISTEN, IT'S ONLY 'CAUSE THIS WORLD
REALLY, REALLY GIVES ME TENSION...
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117. THAT I'M GONNA DO SOMETHING
I DON'T ORDINARILY DO.
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118. I'M GOING TO BEG.
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119. NOW, MAKE A WISH. PLEASE? OKAY.
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120. ALL RIGHT, OKAY. GIVE ME A CAR.
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121. BLACK JAGUAR-XKE.
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122. YES! YES, YES!
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123. JAGUAR? BLACK? XKE.
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124. JAGUAR, BLACK. BETTER STAND BACK.
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125. I AM KAZAAM!
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126. JAGUAR, BLACK, RIGHT? YEAH.
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127. OKAY. KAZAAM!
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128. OKAY, WELL, YOU JUST STAY
HERE. I'M GONNA GO NOW.
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129. UH-OH. HEY, KAZOO?
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130. HERE, KITTY, KITTY, KITTY.
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131. KAZOO? OH, KAZOO.
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132. SAY NIGHTY-NIGHT. KAZOO. KAZOO.
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133. COME ON, YOU GOTTA EAT. NO, I'M NOT...
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134. PLEASE. LOOK, IT'S DELICIOUS.
NO, I'M REALLY... TRAVIS, NO.
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135. IT'S VERY EASY. COME ON.
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136. PLEASE. JUST HOLD THEM
BETWEEN YOUR FINGERS LIKE THIS.
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137. TRAVIS, I KNOW... SQUEEZE A LITTLE.
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138. HE'S IN THE HOUSE. MAX,
HONEY, IS THAT YOU? MAX?
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139. HEY, HEY... HONEY, WHAT
HAPPENED TO YOUR FACE?
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140. I'M OKAY, ALL RIGHT? WHO DID THIS TO YOU?
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141. MAX, WHAT HAPPENED TO
YOUR... JUST LEAVE ME ALONE!
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142. MAX.
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143. I'll HANDLE IT. NO, I
REALLY THINK I SHOULD.
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144. PLEASE.
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145. MAX?
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146. MAX, CAN I COME IN?
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147. WOW. THAT'S REALLY GREAT. YOU FINISHED IT.
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148. HEY, YOU'RE NOT BUILDING A
NEUTRON BOMB OVER HERE, ARE YOU?
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149. THAT COULD BE A LITTLE
DANGEROUS. DON'T TOUCH THAT.
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150. YOU OKAY?
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151. YOU WANT TO TELL ME WHAT HAPPENED?
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152. YOU DON'T LIKE ME VERY MUCH, DO YOU?
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153. LISTEN, MAX, I DON'T INTEND TO
TAKE THE PLACE OF YOUR FATHER.
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154. IT'S JUST THAT I LOVE YOUR
MOM, AND I WANT TO MARRY HER.
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155. I'D LIKE US TO BE FRIENDS.
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156. ANYTIME YOU WANT TO TALK... I'll BE HERE.
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157. MOM?
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158. "TUNA. HOME AT 3:00." SURE.
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159. "NICHOLAS MATTEO."
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160. WHAT THE...
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161. DON'T YOU WISH YOU HAD
ONE OF THESE? HOW DID YOU...
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162. WHAT... ARE YOU LIKE REALLY
LONELY OR SOMETHING?
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163. HEY. HEY, HOLD YOUR CAMELS.
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164. I'VE BEEN DOING THIS GENIE
STUFF FOR ABOUT 5,000 YEARS.
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165. IT'S NOT ALL IT'S CRACKED
UP TO BE. I'M SURE.
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166. BUT I'll TELL YOU WHAT. WHY DON'T
WE START OFF WITH SOMETHING SMALL...
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167. AND WORK OUR WAY UP TO SOMETHING BIG?
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168. BUT LET'S JUST GET IT DONE.
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169. ALL RIGHT? WHY DO I GET THE
FEELING YOU'LL NEVER GO AWAY?
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170. WOW. YOU LIVE HERE?
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171. YEAH, I BUILT IT MYSELF TOO.
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172. HEY, KID! WE'RE CLOSED!
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173. WHAT'S THE MATTER WITH YOU?
CAN'T YOU READ THE SIGN? BEAT IT!
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174. BEAT IT!
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175. YOU WANT ME TO TURN HIM INTO
A DOG OR A CAT OR SOMETHING?
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176. YOUR WISHES ARE JUST SO SPECTACULAR,
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177. I DON'T KNOW IF I COULD BEAR ANOTHER
ONE RIGHT NOW. OH, BACK THERE?
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178. YOUR FIRST WISH? THAT KIND OF
THING COULD HAPPEN TO ANY GENIE.
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179. I WAS JUST A LITTLE BIT RUSTY. YOU KNOW...
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180. I BET THEY REALLY MISS YOU AND THE
NICE BUILDING WITH THE PADDED WALLS.
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181. HEY, JULIE, I NEED SOME
MORE FINISHING NAILS!
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182. YO, YO, YO. CHECK ONE, TWO.
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183. BOTTOM, BOTTOM.
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184. OH, EXCUSE ME, SIR. I'D LIKE
TO SPEAK TO MR. MATTEO.
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185. WHO?
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186. YOUR MOTHER.
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187. I SAID I WANTED THE BAR STOCKED
BEFORE THE SOUND CHECK!
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188. HOW MUCH?
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189. HELLO. WILL YOU HURRY UP OVER THERE?
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190. WHO AM I TALKING TO? PAUL SHEA, LINE THREE.
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191. MR. SHEA, NICK MATTEO. HOW YOU DOING?
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192. HEY, YOU'RE GONNA HAVE
TO HELP ME OUT, MR. SHEA.
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193. LOOK, WHAT I'M SAYING
IS YOU'RE GONNA HAVE...
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194. THE BEST SEAT IN THE HOUSE SET
ASIDE ESPECIALLY FOR YOU TONIGHT.
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195. WE'LL TAKE GOOD CARE OF YOU,
PAUL. UH-HUH. YEAH, I'll SEE YOU TONIGHT.
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196. CINDI, IF I WANTED PRESSED TURKEY,
I WOULD HAVE RUN OVER MYSELF.
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197. - ANYBODY GOT ANY GUM?
- I DO.
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198. - WHO ARE YOU?
- I'M... MAX.
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199. THEO, YOU CALL A MESSENGER?
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200. NO, I DIDN'T CALL ANYBODY. PSST.
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201. TRY DOWNSTAIRS, KID.
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202. HEY, HEY, I LIKE IT! I'M SERIOUS! THIS
WHOLE, YOU KNOW, SEEN-THE-STREET THING.
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203. TELL ME, YOU BOOKED IN OR YOU JUST
COME HERE TO SCARE THE HELL OUT OF US?
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204. THANK YOU.
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205. SO, TOUGH GUY, WHO WAS THAT LOSER?
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206. THAT WAS MY FATHER.
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207. HEY-DEE, HI-DEE-HO.
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208. WAS THAT GUY REALLY YOUR FATHER?
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209. ACTED LIKE HE DIDN'T EVEN KNOW YOU.
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210. LOOK, HE HASN'T SEEN ME IN A LONG TIME.
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211. I WAS TWO, OKAY?
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212. WHERE DID HE GO? AWAY.
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213. THAT'S A LONG TIME AWAY.
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214. I MEAN, IT'S NOT TWO OR THREE
THOUSAND YEARS, BUT THAT'S A LONG TIME.
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215. WELL, HE'S BACK NOW, ALL RIGHT?
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216. AND THINGS ARE GONNA BE DIFFERENT. COOL.
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217. SO HOW COME YOU DIDN'T
TELL HIM WHO YOU WERE?
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218. - WHAT DO YOU CARE?
- WHO SAYS I DID?
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219. - WHY DON'T YOU JUST LEAVE ME ALONE?
- IS THAT A WISH?
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220. IS THAT ALL YOU CARE ABOUT?
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221. LOOK, YOU LITTLE FART,
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222. YOU CALLED ME INTO THIS MESS OF A WORLD.
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223. - I DIDN'T CALL ANYBODY.
- YOU POPPED THE BOX, SO MAKE A WISH!
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224. WISH FOR A CASTLE, A FANCY CHARIOT!
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225. I DON'T CARE WHAT YOU
DO. I GOTTA OBEY THE RULES.
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226. I CAN'T SHOW MY MAGIC TO ANYBODY BUT YOU,
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227. AND I CAN'T GET BACK INTO MY BOX
UNTIL YOU MAKE YOUR THREE WISHES.
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228. NOW, DEAL WITH IT!
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229. - DEAL WITH THIS!
- HEY!
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230. MY TURN.
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231. WHOA! WHOA!
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232. WHAT I GOTTA DO, KID?
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233. LET'S GO! YOU'RE ON MY TURF NOW!
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234. YOU'LL BE SORRY!
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235. COME BACK HERE!
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236. OH, MAX.
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237. OH, NO! REMEMBER ME?
MAKE YOUR THREE WISHES.
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238. I WISH YOU'D GO AWAY! LEAVE ME ALONE!
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239. - I'M GONNA KICK YOUR BUTT!
- DREAM ON, LOSER!
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240. NO WAY I'M LOSING THIS RACE, BUDDY.
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241. KAZAAM!
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242. I'M BACK! TAKE A BREAK, KID.
YOU'RE GONNA NEED IT FOR THIS.
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243. WHOO! DON'T GET ALL HYSTERICAL.
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244. SAY THANK YOU FOR YOUR MIRACLE.
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245. - YOU ARE A GENIE!
- WHAT'S THE MATTER? YOUR TONGUE IS BROKEN?
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246. AT A TIME LIKE THIS, YOU SHOULD BE STOKIN'.
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247. YOU KNOW THE RULES, NOW COMPLY.
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248. KAZAAM, HE GOT UNLIMITED SUPPLY!
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249. YOU'LL GIVE ME ANYTHING?
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250. COME ON, BOY, YOU'RE NOT GONNA DIE.
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251. OPEN YOUR EYES. DON'T ASK WHY.
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252. JUST GIVE IT A TRY.
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253. THEN, THEN, I WISH I HAD JUNK FOOD...
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254. FROM HERE TO THE SKY.
WHY NOT? HIGHER THAN HIGH.
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255. THEN YOU GOT JUNK FOOD
FROM HERE TO THE SKY!
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256. I AM KAZAAM!
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257. THAT'S IT? A HAPPY MEAL?
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258. OH, GREAT.
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259. I'M OUTTA HERE!
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260. LOOK OUT!
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261. OW.
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262. SO... WHERE'S THE HOT CHOCOLATE?
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263. TWO MORE. MAKE THIS A
NIGHT YOU'LL NEVER FORGET.
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264. WAIT A SECOND.
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265. YOU'RE NOT TELLING ME THAT WAS A WISH?
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266. LIKE THE MAIN MAN DID WITH THE LOAVES
AND THE FISH. NO, NO, NO. AND STOP RHYMING!
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267. I WISH...
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268. I JUST WISH MY MOM AND
DAD WOULD FALL BACK IN LOVE.
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269. LOVE? KID, I TOLD YOU,
KAZAAM DON'T DO ETHEREAL.
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270. - "ETHEREAL"?
- YEAH. LOVE, HOPE, TALKING TO GOD, RAISING THE DEAD.
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271. ETHEREAL. BUT I AM MR. MATERIAL,
AND MY STUFF AIN'T TOO SHABBY.
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272. THREE-STORY MANSION, A SACK OF
GOLD, A WHOLE LAND OF MILK AND HONEY...
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273. IF THAT'S STILL IN.
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274. HOW LONG DO I HAVE TO
COME UP WITH THE WISHES?
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275. NOW WOULD BE HIGHLY ADVISABLE.
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276. - COME ON, LET'S GO.
- BUT I CAN WAIT, CAN'T I?
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277. SO... UNTIL I MAKE THOSE LAST TWO WISHES,
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278. I OWN YOU, DON'T I?
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279. TECHNICALLY.
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280. WELCOME TO MY LIFE.
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281. LOSE THE POINTY SHOES.
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282. I'M HUNGRY. I'M NOT.
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283. IT'S LUNCHTIME. NOT ACCORDING TO MY WATCH.
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284. HEY, MY FOSSIL WATCH!
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285. HOW DID THAT HAPPEN?
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286. HUH?
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287. WHAT? EW!
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288. LOOK, GODZILLA, I WISH YOU'D JUST...
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289. WISH I'D JUST WHAT? IS THAT A WISH?
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290. LET ME MAKE THIS PERFECTLY
CLEAR. NEXT TIME YOU DO THAT,
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291. I'M DONATING YOUR BRAIN TO SCIENCE, OKAY?
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292. LOOK, ALL YOU GOTTA DO...
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293. IS MAKE YOUR LAST TWO WISHES...
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294. MR. MOHAMMED ALI...
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295. AND I'M OUTTA HERE. SURE.
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296. ALL RIGHT! ALL RIGHT, THAT'S IT! LET'S GO!
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297. COME ON! LET'S GO RIGHT NOW! COME ON!
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298. YOUR WHOLE WAY OF THINKING
REALLY GIVES ME TENSION, KID. COME ON!
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299. THE NAME ISN'T "KID." IT'S MAX.
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300. YOU'RE GONNA DO WHATEVER I WANT.
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301. AND THEN, ONLY THEN, WILL I MAKE
MY WISH. DO YOU UNDERSTAND?
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302. GOOD.
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303. THIS WHOLE
"I-GOTTA-GET-THE-GUTS-TO-TALK-TO-DAD"...
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304. ISN'T GONNA TAKE YEARS, IS IT? BITE ME.
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305. I'M REALLY SERIOUS ABOUT
THIS GETTING SOMETHING TO EAT.
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306. IT FEELS LIKE I'M GETTING SHORTER.
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307. STAY HERE AND TRY NOT TO HURT YOURSELF!
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308. ALL RIGHT.
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309. THIS ISN'T A TOY STORE.
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310. UNLESS... YOU WANT TO PLAY...
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311. - MY GAME.
- IMPRESSIVE.
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312. LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, DA BRAT!
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313. HOW ARE YOU? WHAT'S UP?
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314. WE'RE GONNA MAKE THE HOTTEST
LIVE RECORDING ANYONE'S EVER HEARD!
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315. YEAH! HOW YOU DOIN'? SPANKY, COME
OVER HERE. I WANT YOU TO MEET SOMEONE.
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316. I WANT YOU TO MEET MY BODYGUARD,
SPANKY. YEAH, YEAH. BODYGUARD?
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317. WHAT'S UP? HE KIND OF SMALL, DON'T
YOU THINK? I DON'T NEED MUCH PROTECTION.
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318. WE'LL SEE MR. MATTEO?
ABOUT THAT. GET OFF ME!
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319. MR. MATTEO, I FOUND THIS KID
WANDERING AROUND BACKSTAGE.
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320. YOU? WHAT ARE YOU DOING
HERE? WHAT'S YOUR NAME?
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321. MAX.
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322. WHO LET THIS KID IN HERE?
WHAT'S THIS, AN AMUSEMENT PARK?
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323. WELL, MACK, THE TOUR IS OVER.
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324. IT'S NOT MACK. IT'S MAX.
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325. MAXWELL.
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326. - OKAY, MAXWELL.
- CONNOR.
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327. MAXWELL CONNOR.
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328. YOU'RE MY SON.
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329. HEY, EVERYBODY, QUIET DOWN,
QUIET DOWN! CHECK THIS OUT!
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330. THIS IS MY BOY, MAXWELL MATTEO.
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331. - I WANT YOU TO MEET EVERYBODY. THIS IS CINDI.
- HI, MAX.
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332. - AND THIS IS FRANKIE OVER HERE.
- HEY.
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333. AND THAT'S THEO OVER THERE.
AND YOU KNOW WHO THIS IS.
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334. - WHAT'S UP, LITTLE MAX?
- COME OVER HERE.
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335. AND THIS AMAZING WONDER
IS ASIA MOON. SON OF A GUN.
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336. I CAN'T BELIEVE IT! LOOK HOW
BIG YOU GOT! THIS IS MY SON.
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337. CHAMPAGNE? WHAT, ARE
YOU STUPID? HE'S A KID.
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338. GET THAT OUTTA HERE. HEY,
DON'T WE HAVE SOME PIZZA COMIN'?
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339. YOU LIKE PIZZA, KID? COME OVER HERE.
I WANT YOU TO CHECK SOMETHING OUT.
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340. YOU LIKE MUSIC? COME HERE. SIT
DOWN, SIT DOWN. LISTEN TO THIS.
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341. SO WHAT DO YOU THINK? IS
THIS PLACE SMOKIN' OR WHAT?
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342. - HOW OLD ARE YOU?
- TWELVE.
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343. THREE LARGE, TWO MEDIUM. PIZZA
'ZAAM'S HERE TO BUST THE TEDIUM.
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344. WHAT? MAYBE A FOOTBALL OR A BASKETBALL?
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345. I DON'T THINK REWARDING HIM IS A VERY GOOD
IDEA RIGHT NOW. IT'S NOT TO REWARD HIM.
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346. HI, GUYS. IT'S TO STRAIGHTEN HIM OUT.
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347. WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN, HMM?
NOT AT SCHOOL. YOU ARE GROUNDED!
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348. - I'VE REALLY HAD IT THIS TIME, MAX.
- HOLD IT, HOLD IT.
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349. TWO DAYS YOU HAVE NOT BEEN...
WAIT A MINUTE. WAIT A MINUTE, ALICE.
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350. WHAT? WHY DON'T WE SIT DOWN AND TALK?
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351. - BECAUSE I AM NOT FINISHED.
- I'M A LITTLE BUSY.
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352. OH, NO, NO, NO, NO, NO, NO.
ONE SECOND, MR. CONNOR.
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353. YOU KNOW, WE ARE GOING TO START
CHANGING THE WAY THINGS WORK AROUND HERE.
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354. FROM NOW ON, YOU'RE GONNA COME HOME FROM
SCHOOL, AND YOU'RE GONNA START DOING CHORES.
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355. - "CHORES"?
- YES, CHORES.
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356. WHAT DO YOU MEAN, CHORES? MILK
THE COWS, FEED CHICKENS? I DON'T GET IT.
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357. MAX, THIS IS EXACTLY THE
THING... ALL RIGHT, ALL RIGHT.
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358. THAT IS REALLY PUTTING ME OVER THE
EDGE. WAIT A MINUTE. FORGET CHORES.
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359. FORGET CHORES. WHAT WE
MEAN IS, WE WANT TO HELP YOU.
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360. WE'RE GONNA GET YOU A TUTOR, AND I'D
LIKE TO START PICKING YOU UP AFTER SCHOOL.
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361. HE'S NOT PICKING ME UP AFTER SCHOOL. I
DON'T HAVE TO LISTEN TO YOU, ALL RIGHT?
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362. YOU'RE NOT MY FATHER. YOU
WILL NEVER BE MY FATHER!
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363. - YOU WATCH YOUR MOUTH.
- WATCH YOURS! YOU LIED TO ME!
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364. YOU TOLD ME MY FATHER WASN'T
HERE, BUT HE IS! I'VE SEEN HIM!
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365. MAX.
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366. PLEASE. WAIT.
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367. YOU'RE RIGHT.
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368. I DID LIE.
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369. YOUR FATHER SHOWED UP A
COUPLE OF MONTHS AGO AND...
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370. I DIDN'T KNOW WHAT TO DO.
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371. WHY DID HE LEAVE?
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372. SOMETIMES THINGS JUST DON'T
TURN OUT THE WAY YOU PLAN.
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373. I KNOW THAT I'M NOT THE BEST
MOTHER IN THE WORLD, MAX,
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374. BUT I WANT YOU TO HAVE A REAL FATHER,
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375. ONE WHO'S AROUND, WHO YOU CAN COUNT ON.
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376. DO YOU UNDERSTAND THAT? NO.
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377. SO, TOUGH GUY...
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378. - WHAT'S "GROUNDED"?
- SOMETHING I'M NOT!
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379. MY DAD SAYS IT'S THE BLOOD THAT COUNTS.
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380. I'll GET A JOB! I'll SHOW THEM!
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381. MAYBE I'll EVEN BE A PERSONAL
ASSISTANT! I'll SHOW THEM ALL!
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382. ONCE I KNOW THE BUSINESS AND
STUFF, I CAN EVEN HAVE A BAND MYSELF.
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383. MY DAD WILL MANAGE US.
PRETTY BIG DREAMS, KID.
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384. WHAT DO YOU KNOW? YOU LIVE IN A BOX!
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385. BOOM BOX, THAT IS. SO WHAT?
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386. EVERY ONCE IN AWHILE, SOMEONE DRAGS ME OUT.
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387. AND I DO SEE THINGS.
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388. LIKE A WHOLE BUNCH OF SILLY PEOPLE,
COUNTING ON A WHOLE BUNCH OF SILLY WISHES.
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389. LET ME BE THE FIRST TO TELL YOU, THE
FUTURE DON'T ALWAYS FOLLOW THE PLAN.
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390. BECAUSE THE PLAN SUCKS BIG TIME!
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391. SEE, I'M MAKING MY FUTURE HERE, KAZ,
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392. AND THE NEXT STEP IS TWO ALL-ACCESS
PASSES TO TONIGHT'S CONCERT.
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393. DON'T SAY I DIDN'T WARN YOU, BOYS.
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394. I THINK I'M GONNA WAIT OUTSIDE, MAX.
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395. NO WAY, MAN. THIS IS COOL!
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396. ROCKY, BULLWINKLE, SHALL WE?
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397. COME ON, ROCKY.
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398. BUDDY, IT'S LIKE TRYING TO
HIDE A TANKER BEHIND A SAILBOAT.
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399. WHAT IF THEY DON'T LIKE ME?
THEY ALREADY DON'T LIKE YOU.
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400. THE QUESTION IS, WHAT
ARE YOU GONNA DO ABOUT IT?
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401. GET SET FOR MY TETE-A-TETE-TETE.
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402. OH, MR. MALIK.
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403. YOUR CLUB... WHAT A PLACE.
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404. - I KNEW IT WAS GONNA BE HOT.
- I ALWAYS DELIVER...
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405. MORE THAN I PROMISE.
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406. OH! SO DO I.
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407. I'VE GOT LOTS OF CLIENTS...
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408. I'M LOOKING FOR MR. MATTEO.
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409. ALL RIGHT.
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410. YOU TOOK THIS JOB, NO QUESTIONS ASKED!
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411. NO, I WAS HIRED TO RECORD A LIVE
PERFORMANCE, NOT BOOTLEG A LEGIT ALBUM!
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412. I QUIT! GET OVER HERE!
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413. THE LAST ONE OF THESE TAPES WAS
WORTH A MILLION DOLLARS TO MALIK.
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414. 'CAUSE PIRACY'S A FELONY, NICK. I
DON'T WANT TO BE INVOLVED. OH, R...
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415. WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE? GET OUTTA
HERE! LET ME PAINT A PICTURE FOR YOU, ED.
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416. FINE. GO AHEAD YOU ARE INVOLVED!
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417. NO, I'M NOT INVOLVED. I
SAID GET OUT OF HERE!
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418. I QUIT, NICK! DAD...
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419. IT'S NOT MY PROBLEM ANYMORE! I GOT 50,000
BLANKS COMING IN OUR LITTLE LOADING DOCK!
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420. - YOU BETTER HAVE THAT TAPE READY BY 3:00!
- DAD!
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421. FORGET ABOUT IT, NICK. I
TOLD YOU TO GET OUT OF HERE!
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422. I'M TELLIN' YA, I'M OUTTA HERE! SHUT UP!
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423. YOU STAY THERE.
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424. WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING
HERE? ARE YOU LOOKING FOR TROUBLE?
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425. DAD, I THOUGHT IT WAS JUST GONNA
BE YOU AND I. THERE IS NO "YOU AND I."
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426. DAD. GET OUT AND STAY OUT!
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427. BUT, DAD, YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND.
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428. I TOLD YOU SPINDERELLA
WOULD PACK THE HOUSE.
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429. YOU MEAN YOU'VE DONE YOUR JOB. GOOD BOY.
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430. BUT WHAT I AM REALLY
INTERESTED IN IS THIS MAN.
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431. I DON'T KNOW WHO HE IS. JUST SOME GUY.
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432. YOU GOTTA WATCH FOR THESE THINGS, NICK.
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433. YOU GOTTA KEEP YOUR
EYES OPEN FOR NEW TALENT.
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434. YOU GOTTA LOOK FOR THE SPARKLE.
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435. NICK TELLS ME WHAT A GOOD MAN YOU ARE.
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436. I'M COUNTING ON IT.
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437. HEY, WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE?
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438. I DIDN'T KNOW SPINDERELLA OPENED
THE SHOW WITH A DWARF TOSSING.
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439. WHERE'D YOU FIND THIS, TRASH DUMPSTER?
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440. NO, I WAS IN THERE, ALL RIGHT?
YEAH, I SUPPOSE YOU GOT...
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441. A KEY TO THE STUDIO. LOOK, I WAS
ALL OVER. I WAS IN THE V.I.P. SECTION.
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442. I CAN GO WHEREVER I WANT. I GOT PULL.
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443. - OH, HE'S GOT PULL NOW. PULL THIS.
- YEAH.
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444. I'M TELLIN' THE TRUTH. THEY'RE DOIN' A
LIVE RECORDING WORTH A MILLION BUCKS.
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445. THEY'RE TAPING IT RIGHT NOW. IF I WANTED
TO, I COULD GO STRAIGHT BACK IN THERE,
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446. STRAIGHT TO THE RECORDING BOOTH
AND PUT THE TAPE IN YOUR HANDS.
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447. HEY... YOU MEAN THAT, HOMIE?
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448. YEAH. YEAH, I DO.
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449. SOMETHING NEW ON THE PLATE?
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450. HIM? HE'S TALL, MALIK.
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451. DON'T MISTAKE THAT FOR INTERESTING.
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452. I WAS RAISED TO FIND
EVERYTHING INTERESTING.
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453. HE'S GOT A SECRET BIGGER THAN HE IS.
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454. KNOW A PERSON'S SECRET, YOU OWN THEM.
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455. BRING ME HIS.
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456. KAZAAM! HEY, KAZAAM!
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457. MALIK WOULD LIKE YOU TO JOIN
US TONIGHT. WOULD YOU SIGN MINE?
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458. THE THING IS... I'M LOOKING FOR MAX.
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459. HE'S WITH NICK. AND I THINK
WE'LL JUST BE IN THE WAY.
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460. PLEASE, MY FAVORITE.
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461. - NUBIAN GOAT EYES?
- THE FOOD OF KINGS!
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462. I HAVEN'T HAD THESE IN 3,000...
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463. DAYS.
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464. YOU HAVE OLD-FASHIONED TASTE.
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465. I DON'T GET OUT MUCH.
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466. THAT WE CAN CHANGE.
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467. NO, GO AROUND TO THE OTHER SIDE.
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468. SHH!
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469. YOU'RE LATE! COME ON!
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470. HURRY UP!
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471. WHAT, ARE YOU CRAZY? ALL RIGHT.
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472. HEY, SHEP, BRING IT DOWN HERE!
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473. TRAFFIC AT 2:00 IN THE MORNING? YEAH.
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474. COME ON. IT WAS SUPPOSED TO ALREADY
BE HERE. I TOLD YOU FIVE MINUTES AGO.
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475. MR. MATTEO, I GOT THE TAPE! IT'S FINISHED!
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476. WAIT RIGHT HERE. I'll BE RIGHT
BACK DOWN. CLOSE THE DOOR.
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477. WHAT DOOR? THE LOADING DOCK
DOOR. JUST PRESS THE BUTTON.
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478. - WHAT BUTTON?
- THE BUTTON ON THE SIDE!
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479. HEY, WAIT!
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480. DOWNSTAIRS! COME ON!
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481. - LET'S GO!
- ALL RIGHT, YOU PUNKS!
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482. ALL RIGHT, LET'S GO! LET'S GO!
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483. COME BACK HERE, YOU GUYS!
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484. HEY... HEY, HOLD IT RIGHT THERE!
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485. HEY! COME ON BACK HERE!
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486. MOM?
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487. GET OUT OF MY BED!
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488. YOU KNOW, YOU WERE RIGHT FOR ME TO GET OUT
THERE LAST NIGHT. THEY TOTALLY LOVED ME.
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489. WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE ANYWAY?
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490. LOOK, VIRGO. THAT WASN'T HERE YESTERDAY.
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491. HEY, WHAT'S THIS? WHAT
ARE YOU DOING HERE ANYWAY?
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492. WHAT YOU LOOKING FOR?
NOTHING! I'M LOOKING FOR NOTHING!
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493. NOTHING IS GOOD. WHAT'S THIS, SCIENCE?
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494. "POLAR COVALENT BONDS HAVE
AN IONIC... " YOU KNOW THIS STUFF?
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495. MY MOM WISHES I DID.
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496. HEY!
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497. WOW. YOU'RE A GENIE TOO.
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498. YOU SHOULD'VE SEEN US LAST
NIGHT IN MALIK'S LIMO, JUST CHILLIN'.
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499. HAVING A GOOD TIME, EATING
GOAT EYES, JUST CHILLIN'.
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500. WHAT'S THAT?
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501. YOU-YOU SMELL LIKE HIPPOPOTAMUS BUTT!
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502. DAMN.
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503. YOU KNOW, YOUR FATHER SURE IS LUCKY TO WORK
WITH MALIK. HE SAYS I GOT A FUTURE IN THE BIZ.
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504. IS ASIA GONNA LOVE ME OR WHAT?
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505. ESPECIALLY NOW. SO, YOU AND
YOUR FATHER HAVE A NICE NIGHT TOO?
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506. NICE NIGHT? MAX!
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507. FRENCH TOAST! AHH. OOH.
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508. ROTIE FRANCAISE?
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509. I LOVE IT BEAUCOUP, BEAUCOUP, BEAUCOUP!
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510. MMM.
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511. MAX. HEY. HEY, HEY, HEY.
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512. THAT'S RIGHT, IT'S POISON.
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513. I FIGURED IF I ENDED YOUR
SUFFERING, MINE WOULD END TOO.
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514. MAX. LAST NIGHT... DON'T DO THAT AGAIN.
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515. I MADE YOUR FAVORITE, WITH
CHOCOLATE CHIPS AND PEANUT BUTTER.
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516. I'M NOT HUNGRY. DO I HAVE
TO HAVE THIS... MAX! PLEASE!
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517. FOR ONCE IN YOUR LIFE,
LET ME HAVE THE LAST WORD.
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518. OKAY?
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519. SO, SO SORRY. MAX INSISTED.
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520. HE'S TOLD ME SO MUCH ABOUT YOU.
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521. I-I'M SORRY. H-HAVE I MET YOU BEFORE?
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522. NO, MA'AM, I HAVEN'T HAD THE PLEASURE.
I AM JEFFERSON ALLENSWORTH LAMB.
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523. "JEFFERSON" FOR HE WHO
FRAMED OUR FINE CONSTITUTION,
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524. "ALLENSWORTH" FOR HE WHO
FOUNDED A COMMUNITY OF FREE BLACKS...
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525. AND "LAMB" BECAUSE I
LIKE TO EAT LAMB CHOPS.
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526. AND YOU'RE A FRIEND OF MAX'S?
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527. HOW SWEET OF YOU TO CALL ME A FRIEND,
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528. BUT THE SCHOOL DISTRICT MORE
COMMONLY REFERS TO ME AS A TUTOR.
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529. A TUTOR? OH, THE SCHOOL GOT YOU A TUTOR?
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530. OH, I-I'M SORRY. I-I DIDN'T HEAR THE DOOR.
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531. UH, YOU'VE BEEN STUDYING?
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532. Y-YEAH, YEAH, I HAVE, INVERSE
RATIOS OF HEIGHT TO INTELLIGENCE.
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533. HE GETS THAT WIT FROM ME.
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534. UH, WELL, MR. LAMB, WOULD, UH...
HAVE YOU HAD BREAKFAST YET?
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535. CHOCOLATE AND PEANUT
BUTTER FRENCH TOAST? HEAVENLY.
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536. OH, PLEASE. SIT DOWN.
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537. WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE?
GET OUT OF HERE. GET OUT.
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538. I'll MAKE SOME MORE. DON'T
BOTHER. I'M NOT HUNGRY.
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539. BREAKFAST WARS. YES, YOU
ARE. NOT EVEN A LITTLE HUNGRY?
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540. - OH, MAX?
- WHAT?
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541. MAX, WAIT UP!
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542. SO, WHAT DID YOU AND
YOUR FATHER DO LAST NIGHT?
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543. DO? UH, LOTS OF STUFF.
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544. "STUFF" IS GOOD. WHAT
KIND OF STUFF? STUFF, OKAY?
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545. OH. HMM, I USED TO DO
STUFF A LONG TIME AGO.
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546. SHOULDN'T YOU BE GOING TO SCHOOL?
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547. I'M NOT GOING. SAY WHAT?
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548. NO, I'M NOT GOING TO SCHOOL!
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549. SO, WHAT DO YOU THINK ABOUT
THIS SHIRT? DO I LOOK COOL OR WHAT?
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550. HEY...
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551. WHAT'S LIKE THE WORST THING
YOU'VE EVER SEEN IN YOUR LIFE?
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552. THE DESTRUCTION OF POMPEII.
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553. THAT WAS A WISH? THAT WAS
YOU? LOOK, I DIDN'T HAVE A CHOICE.
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554. BESIDES, I DID SOME HARD TIME
UNDER THAT ASH. TRY 342 YEARS.
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555. SO, LIKE, I MEAN, WHAT ABOUT YOU?
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556. YOU EVER TAKE ANYTHING
YOU SHOULDN'T HAVE...
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557. OR SOMETHING LIKE THAT, YOU KNOW? ME?
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558. YEAH. LIKE, WHAT'S THE WORST
THING YOU'VE EVER DONE?
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559. LOOK, CAN WE TALK ABOUT THIS LATER? I
GOT THINGS I GOTTA DO, PEOPLE I GOTTA SEE.
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560. WHAT? I GOTTA GET READY.
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561. READY FOR WHAT? FOR TONIGHT.
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562. - TONIGHT?
- I'M GONNA PERFORM.
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563. - YOU?
- YEAH, YOU SAID I WAS COOL.
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564. YEAH, WELL, WHAT ARE YOU GONNA RAP ABOUT?
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565. YOU'RE RIGHT. THE WHOLE
THING IS GIVING ME TENSION.
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566. I CAN'T EVEN DECIDE WHAT TO WEAR.
IT DOESN'T MATTER WHAT YOU WEAR.
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567. I MEAN, BUT YOU GOTTA HAVE
SOMETHING TO RAP ABOUT, YOUR RHYMES.
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568. I MEAN, YOU GOTTA HAVE SOMETHING TO SAY.
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569. NOW WHAT DO YOU KNOW ABOUT
RAPPING? I KNOW A FEW THINGS.
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570. YEAH, RIGHT. MY NAME IS
MAX, SO GET THESE FACTS.
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571. I'M ON MY HEAVY B.M.X., AND I
MAKE SOME TRACKS. THAT'S WHACK!
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572. THAT'S HORRIBLE! OH, MY GOD,
THAT'S AWFUL. YOU DO BETTER.
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573. WHAT ARE WE, MAX?
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574. I CANNOT HEAR YOU! WHAT ARE WE?
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575. MAN, IT MUST BE GREAT TO BE A GENIE.
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576. SURE, EXCEPT YOU'RE LOCKED UP.
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577. A COUPLE OF MILLENNIA
LATER, YOUR LAMP BREAKS.
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578. OH, YOU THINK YOU'RE FREE, BUT
YOU'RE SUCKED INTO A COMPASS.
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579. YOU GO DOWN WITH THE SHIP.
ONE DAY, YOU'RE SALVAGED.
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580. YOU WIND UP IN A RADIATOR, A
TROMBONE. YOU GOT IT; A BROKEN BOOM BOX.
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581. BUT YOU CAN JUST SNAP YOUR
FINGERS AND HAVE ANYTHING.
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582. YEAH, BUT I CAN'T MAKE MYSELF FREE.
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583. OR MAKE SOMEONE FALL IN LOVE.
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584. OR EVEN MAKE SOMEONE FALL IN LOVE
WITH ME. I CAN'T EVEN TOUCH DESTINY.
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585. WELL, I JUST WISH I COULD
CHANGE THINGS, YOU KNOW?
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586. MAKE THINGS DIFFERENT.
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587. YOU'RE NOT TALKING ABOUT
GENIES. YOU'RE TALKING ABOUT DJINN.
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588. DJINN? WHAT'S A DJINN?
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589. A DJINN IS FREE. A DJINN CAN DO ANYTHING.
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590. LOVE, THE FUTURE, FATE.
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591. THE PROBLEM IS, DJINN
ONLY EXIST IN FAIRY TALES,
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592. AND I DON'T BELIEVE IN FAIRY TALES.
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593. YEAH, WELL, I DON'T BELIEVE
IN FAIRY TALES EITHER.
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594. BUT THEN AGAIN, I DON'T BELIEVE
IN WISHES. AND LOOK WHAT YOU GOT.
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595. DOESN'T YOUR SCHOOL HAVE A BELL?
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596. YEAH. ALL RIGHT. I GUESS I BETTER BE GOING.
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597. SEE YA. SEE YA.
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598. YO, THE BUSINESS MAN. YO, WHAT'S UP, MAN?
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599. HOW'S IT GOING? HAVING FUN, MAX?
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600. SOME CAJONES, HUH?
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601. SO, YOU GOTTA TALK TO YOUR DAD.
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602. TELL HIM IF HE WANTS THE
TAPE BACK, IT'S GONNA COST HIM.
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603. THIS IS YOUR BIG CHANCE, MAN.
DO THIS, EVERYTHING CHANGES.
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604. YOU GOT MONEY, EVERYBODY
LOOKS AT YOU DIFFERENTLY.
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605. YOU DON'T DO THIS... YOU
DON'T WANT TO SAY NO.
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606. ARE YOU ALL RIGHT?
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607. YEAH.
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608. GET UP!
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609. NICK, PLEASE.
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610. NICK, NICK.
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611. YOU KNEW THE TAPE WAS
WORTH A MILLION DOLLARS.
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612. WHAT WAS HE THINKING?
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613. HE WAS GONNA WORK IT OFF?
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614. I KNOW HOW MUCH IT WAS WORTH. I'll FIND IT.
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615. BUT WHAT WILL I FIND? MY LOYAL FRIEND...
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616. OR A MAN AT THE BOTTOM OF THE LAKE?
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617. I'll GET IT TO YOU BY MIDNIGHT TONIGHT.
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618. BUT I STILL FIND IT CURIOUS.
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619. ON SURVEILLANCE TAPES,
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620. IT LOOKS LIKE WE WERE ROBBED
BY A BUNCH OF LITTLE BOYS.
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621. HOW COULD THAT BE?
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622. I DON'T KNOW.
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623. NEITHER DO I.
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624. KAZAAM! KAZAAM!
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625. REVERE IS READY, BUT
HE DOESN'T HAVE A HORSE.
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626. KAZAAM!
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627. SO HE WISHES FOR THE
FASTEST DAMN MARE IN CREATION.
Copy !req
628. AND WHAT DO YOU KNOW; A COUNTRY IS BORN.
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629. WHERE DID YOU LEARN ALL THIS, HARVARD?
Copy !req
630. HARVARD? I'M WAY TOO
INTELLIGENT FOR HARVARD.
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631. I EXPERIENCED MY ACADEMIA
IN UPPER MESOPOTAMIA.
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632. BUT NOTHING IS MORE MAJOR
THAN MY STUDIES IN ASIA.
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633. KAZAAM!
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634. SO HOW'D YOU GET TO
WORK FOR A GUY LIKE MALIK?
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635. YOU DON'T WANT TO KNOW. YES, I DO. TRY ME.
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636. WITH A TALENT LIKE YOURS, YOU'LL
GET TO KNOW HIM AS WELL AS I DO.
Copy !req
637. BUT WILL I GET TO KNOW YOU?
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638. I'll BE RIGHT BACK.
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639. KAZAAM!
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640. KAZAAM!
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641. WHAT THE... GET OFF THE TABLE.
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642. KAZAAM, I GOTTA MAKE A WISH! WHAT
ARE YOU DOING? GET OFF THE TABLE.
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643. KAZAAM, I NEED A WISH, OKAY? RIGHT NOW?
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644. NO, IN 250 YEARS, STUPID! I NEED A
TAPE. NO, NO, I WISH I HAD THE TAPE.
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645. - WHAT KIND OF TAPE?
- THE MASTER TAPE OF LAST NIGHT'S SHOW.
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646. CAN'T YOUR FATHER GIVE IT TO YOU?
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647. NO! DO YOU HAVE A PROBLEM WITH THIS WISH?
Copy !req
648. - NO, IT'S JUST THAT IT'S YOUR SECOND WISH.
- SO?
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649. - SO YOU WANT TO WASTE IT ON A TAPE?
- I JUST DO, OKAY?
Copy !req
650. JUST GET ME THE TAPE! I MEAN, COME ON, YOU
KNOW THE DRILL. "I AM KAZAAM... " LET'S GO!
Copy !req
651. THAT WE CAN DO.
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652. HUH?
Copy !req
653. NO!
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654. WHY ARE WE HERE? JUST
SAVING YOU A WISH, MY MAN.
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655. I-IT'S NOT HERE. HOW DO YOU KNOW?
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656. I JUST KNOW, OKAY?
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657. WHY ISN'T THE TAPE HERE, MAX?
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658. WHY ARE YOU STALLING? ALL YOU EVER
WANTED WAS TO MAKE MY THREE WISHES!
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659. 'CAUSE YOU'RE BLOWING A
WHOLE WISH! SOMETHING'S WRONG.
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660. I GOT A NOSE FOR THIS KIND OF STUFF.
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661. TALK TO ME, MAX. I'M YOUR FRIEND.
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662. I DON'T NEED A FRIEND, I NEED A GENIE!
NOW, GRANT MY SECOND WISH! I ORDER YOU!
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663. YOUR WISH IS MY COMMAND.
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664. - I'M OUTTA HERE.
- LET ME ASSIST YOU.
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665. FOUR OF THE REPUBLICS OF
THE FORMER SOVIET UNION...
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666. WHOA!
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667. UH, UNOCAL? UNISTAN?
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668. PAKISTAN? STAN THE MAN?
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669. DETENTION!
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670. TELL ME YOU HAD A WONDERFUL BREAKFAST.
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671. TELL ME THAT YOU COULDN'T HAVE
ANOTHER BITE. TELL ME EVERYTHING.
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672. L.S.U. GRAD,
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673. PROFESSIONAL PERFORMER SINCE HE WAS EIGHT.
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674. LIKE I SAID, HE'S ABOUT AS
INTERESTING AS HIS PITUITARY GLAND.
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675. COME ON, ASIA.
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676. GIVE KAZAAM ANOTHER SHOT, WON'T YOU?
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677. I KNOW THERE IS SOMETHING
ABOUT THAT BOOM BOX,
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678. AND I AM JUST DYING TO FIND OUT.
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679. YO, JAKE. TWO HOURS IN
DETENTION. THAT SUCKS.
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680. MRS. DUKE SUCKS.
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681. WE GOTTA TALK.
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682. SEE YOU LATER, MAN.
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683. COME ON, IN THE CAR.
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684. WAIT. MAX. MAX.
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685. WAIT. MAX. MAX, HONEY, GET OUT OF THE CAR.
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686. - NICK, WHAT THE HELL DO YOU THINK YOU'RE DOING?
- THIS IS BETWEEN ME AND MY BOY.
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687. YOUR BOY? YOU HAVEN'T SEEN HIM IN
OVER A DECADE. YOU HAVE NO RIGHTS HERE.
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688. - THIS HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH YOU.
- YOU WANT ME TO CALL THE COPS?
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689. MAX, HE'S NOT WHAT YOU THINK
HE IS. GET OUT OF THE CAR. LET GO.
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690. MAX. GO BACK TO TRAVIS!
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691. MAX, NO! MAX, NO! NO, STOP!
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692. FIFTEEN YEARS. FIFTEEN YEARS!
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693. NEVER IN MY LIFE HAVE I EVER
SEEN SOMETHING SO STUPID!
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694. - BUT DAD, I-I...
- I KNOW WHAT YOU STOLE, YOU AND YOUR PUNK FRIENDS!
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695. DAD, PLEASE...
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696. I TOLD YOU...
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697. JESUS.
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698. WHY'D YOU HAVE TO COME NOW?
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699. MOM WAS GONNA MARRY TRAVIS.
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700. I THOUGHT I'D NEVER SEE YOU AGAIN.
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701. YOU MUST HAVE REALLY
THOUGHT I WAS SOMETHING.
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702. I NEVER KNEW WHAT TO THINK. YOU WERE GONE.
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703. LISTEN TO ME.
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704. YOU DON'T WANT TO BE LIKE ME.
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705. YOU DON'T WANT TO LIVE MY LIFE.
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706. YOU GOT A CHOICE. I DON'T. YOU UNDERSTAND?
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707. A GUY LIKE ME, YOU CAN'T JUST WALK AWAY...
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708. AND PRETEND ALL THIS DIDN'T HAPPEN.
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709. DO YOU KNOW HOW MANY COPS
WOULD LOVE TO LOCK ME UP?
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710. ALL RIGHT, LOOK. I WANT
TO TELL YOU SOMETHING.
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711. YOU GET NO SECOND CHANCES IN LIFE.
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712. YOU GET NO SECOND CHANCES. REMEMBER THAT.
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713. GO ON, GET OUTTA HERE.
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714. GO ON, GO!
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715. WOW, LOOK AT THAT! THAT'S SOME BOOM BOX.
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716. IT HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH THE BOX.
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717. WELL, IF YOU'RE LOOKING
FOR THIS, I FOUND IT.
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718. START PRODUCTION. YOU GOT IT.
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719. I WANT THE FIRST RUN PACKED
AND SHIPPED BY SUNRISE.
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720. NICK... STICK AROUND.
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721. I WANT TO TALK TO YOU ABOUT YOUR SON.
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722. HOW ABOUT IT, PARTY PEOPLE! PUT
YOUR HANDS TOGETHER FOR KLASS K!
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723. WHOO! YES! THERE'S ABOUT A THOUSAND
PEOPLE OUT THERE, AND THEY LOVED ME!
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724. YOU LOOK TERRIFIC! JUST GREAT!
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725. YES. WHOO!
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726. KAZAAM! KAZAAM! I GOT
IT, I GOT IT! WHAT IS IT?
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727. KAZAAM! I NEED TO MAKE MY LAST WISH!
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728. SAY WHAT? MY THIRD WISH! I WISH
MY DAD HAD A SECOND CHANCE.
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729. IS THE KID BOTHERING YOU?
LEAVE ME ALONE. LEAVE ME ALONE.
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730. WHAT IS IT? DON'T YOU WANT HIM BACK?
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731. LET ME HEAR YOU MAKE SOME NOISE!
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732. I WISH MY DAD HAD A SECOND CHANCE.
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733. YOU KNOW, LIKE A DIFFERENT
LIFE. NO CAN DO, KID.
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734. KAZAAM, YOU GOTTA HELP ME!
WE'VE BEEN OVER THIS BEFORE.
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735. NEW LIVES, DESTINY. KAZAAM
CAN'T DO ETHEREAL... KAZAAM!
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736. I NEED THIS MORE THAN ANYTHING
I'VE EVER NEEDED IN MY ENTIRE LIFE!
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737. I MEAN, CAN'T YOU EVEN TRY? BELIEVE
ME, I'VE BEEN TRYING ALL MY LIFE.
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738. JUST TRY HARDER! LOOK, I CAN'T DO IT!
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739. KAZAAM, I GOTTA MAKE THIS WISH! WHEN YOU GONNA
LEARN? LIFE AIN'T ABOUT WISHIN' AND DREAMS.
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740. IT'S ABOUT WHAT YOU GOT AND WHAT YOU CAN
DO WITH IT! PLEASE! THIS IS ALL MY FAULT!
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741. I'M NOT SOME DJINN. I JUST CAN'T
SNAP MY FINGERS AND MAKE YOU HAPPY.
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742. YOU JUST DON'T WANT TO
GRANT MY THIRD WISH, DO YOU?
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743. YOU'VE GOT ALL THIS, AND NOW YOU
DON'T WANT TO GO BACK IN YOUR BOX!
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744. I THOUGHT YOU WERE MY FRIEND!
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745. FRIEND? DON'T YOU
REMEMBER? I'M JUST YOUR GENIE!
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746. YOU...
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747. YOU'RE NOTHING!
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748. MAX! WHAT IS IT? NOTHING!
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749. WHAT'S THE MATTER? JUST LEAVE ME ALONE!
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750. MAX!
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751. EXCUSE ME. WHAT'S WRONG WITH MAX?
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752. HE'LL BE ALL RIGHT. HE WAS REALLY UPSET.
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753. I KNOW, BUT LISTEN TO THIS
CROWD. THEY LOVE ME. I OWN THEM.
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754. YOU DON'T OWN THEM! SAY WHAT?
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755. YOU DON'T GET IT, DO YOU?
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756. LOOK, LOOK, LOOK WHAT YOU HAVE!
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757. DO YOU KNOW HOW JEALOUS
YOU ARE MAKING ME? HUH? HUH?
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758. I'M JUST TELLING MY
STORY. NO, IT'S MUCH MORE.
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759. YOU ARE... YOU HAVE A...
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760. THERE IS AN ANCIENT PHRASE.
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761. "SULTAN'S GOLD."
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762. YOU SPEAK!
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763. UH, YOU KNOW...
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764. YOU ARE THE "SULTAN'S GOLD"!
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765. YOU GOT TWO MINUTES.
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766. MY BOX!
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767. WHERE'S MY BOX? DON'T
WORRY ABOUT THE LITTLE THINGS.
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768. - LISTEN.
- WE WANT MORE!
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769. YOUR PUBLIC CALLS. TRUST ME.
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770. THIS IS MY WORLD.
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771. RIGHT NOW, YOU ARE THE BIGGEST PART OF IT.
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772. MY SULTAN'S GOLD...
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773. LIVES IN A GENIE'S LAMP.
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774. - GET OUTTA HERE!
- DAD, WHAT HAPPENED?
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775. GO! GO!
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776. AT LONG LAST. LOOK FAMILIAR?
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777. YOUR FATHER'S BEEN VERY MODEST...
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778. ABOUT YOUR ACCOMPLISHMENTS, MAX.
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779. THAT'S RIGHT. I'VE GOT THE BOX,
AND YOU'RE ON YOUR LAST WISH.
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780. LOOK, MALIK, LET'S STOP
PLAYING THESE GAMES.
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781. I DON'T KNOW WHAT YOU'RE
TALKING ABOUT, AND NEITHER DOES HE.
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782. YOU CAN'T KEEP ALL THESE SECRETS FROM ME.
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783. YOU GOT YOUR TAPE. HE'S JUST A BOY!
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784. DAD! WHAT ARE YOU DOING? YOU CAN'T...
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785. MAKE THE WISH, I GET THE GENIE.
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786. AND EVERYTHING MY HEART DESIRES!
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787. AND IF YOU TRY ANYTHING CLEVER...
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788. DEARLY BELOVED NICK...
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789. WILL WAKE UP... DEAD.
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790. KLASS K! KLASS K! KLASS K!
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791. KLASS K! KLASS K!
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792. "I WANT MALIK TO HAVE ALL
THE MONEY IN THE WORLD."
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793. DON'T YOU SEE, I WISHED FOR THAT, BUT
YOU CAN'T DO THAT. BECAUSE IF YOU DO THAT,
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794. THE REST OF THE WORLD GOES BROKE
AND MONEY ISN'T WORTH ANYTHING!
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795. THEN I'll TAKE ALL THE MONEY
AND GIVE SOME OF IT BACK!
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796. MAKE MY WISH NOW! I CAN'T! I CAN'T
JUST SAY, "HEY, KAZAAM, I NEED YOUR HELP,"
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797. AND HE'LL APPEAR RIGHT IN FRONT OF ME.
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798. I CAN'T JUST SAY, "KAZAAM!"
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799. LET'S GET BUSY, K!
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800. MAKE THE WISH... OR YOUR FATHER WILL DIE.
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801. I COUNT TO THREE. ONE, TWO, THREE!
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802. GET OUT! GET OUT!
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803. HELP!
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804. RUN! WHAT ARE WE GONNA DO?
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805. COME ON! TO THE RIGHT! TO THE RIGHT!
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806. STAY OVER HERE! STAY OVER HERE!
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807. LOOK OUT!
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808. WHAT IS THIS PLACE? SHH!
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809. LET'S GO THIS WAY. OH, HERE THEY COME.
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810. COME ON! COME ON! WE LOST THEM!
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811. WE CAN'T FIND... GO LEFT! GO LEFT!
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812. WHAT ARE WE GONNA DO?
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813. ALL RIGHT, WAIT HERE. WHAT ARE THESE?
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814. BLACK MARKET CDs. LET'S GO.
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815. DAD, LOOK OUT!
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816. LET'S RUN FOR IT! GO! GO!
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817. I'M THE ONE WITH THE POWER.
I'M THE ONE WITH THE GENIE.
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818. KAZAAM, HE'S MY GENIE.
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819. AND AS LONG AS I'M STANDING HERE,
HE'LL DO WHATEVER I TELL HIM TO.
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820. THEN I GUESS MY ONLY PROBLEM IS...
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821. THAT YOU ARE STILL STANDING!
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822. KAZAAM!
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823. IT WORKED!
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824. NOW... BE A GOOD GENIE...
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825. AND GET INTO THE BOX.
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826. - I DON'T UNDERSTAND.
- YOU'VE BEEN CALLED.
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827. WHERE'S MAX?
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828. MAX...
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829. HAS TERMINATED YOUR CONTRACT.
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830. YOU HAVE A NEW MASTER.
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831. NOW... HOP, HOP.
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832. BUT I HAVEN'T GRANTED HIS THIRD WISH YET.
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833. TRUST ME, HE WON'T BE ASKING FOR ANY MORE.
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834. WHAT'D YOU DO WITH HIM?
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835. IT'S BEGUN.
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836. - OOH!
- NO.
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837. YES.
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838. HIS HEAD STILL LOOKS THICK.
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839. NOT ALL THERE, KLASS K? HUH?
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840. COME ON!
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841. OH!
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842. COME ON!
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843. YOU CAN'T HURT ME.
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844. I AM YOUR MASTER!
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845. WHAT? I'll NEVER BE YOUR SLAVE!
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846. NOW... WHERE'S MAX?
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847. UH, YEAH, YEAH, YEAH.
HE FELL DOWN THE SHAFT!
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848. WHAT? THERE WAS NOTHING THAT I COULD DO!
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849. PUT ME DOWN. I'M AFRAID OF HEIGHT.
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850. WISH NOT GRANTED.
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851. OOH! AHH!
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852. YEAH, THAT'S OKAY OVER THERE.
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853. BRING IT OVER THERE.
COME ON, LET'S MOVE IT ASIDE.
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854. GET THOSE THINGS MOVED OFF TO THE SIDE,
ALL RIGHT? OVER THERE. MAX, MAX, MAX...
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855. LADY. LADY, WHERE YOU GOIN'? NOW YOU CAN'T
GO IN THERE. I THINK MY SON'S IN THERE.
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856. YOU CAN'T GO... I THINK THAT MY SON IS IN...
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857. LADY, YOU CAN'T GO IN THERE. OKAY, LOOK,
I NEED TO FIND TRAVIS. HE'S A FIREMAN.
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858. TRAVIS? TRAVIS O'NEIL.
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859. TRAVIS O'NEIL IS IN THERE.
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860. HEY, TOUGH GUY.
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861. NO!
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862. IN 5,000 YEARS...
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863. YOU'RE THE ONLY FRIEND I'VE EVER HAD.
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864. AND WHEN YOU NEEDED ME THE MOST,
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865. I WASN'T THERE.
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866. AND IF I HAD TO SPEND
ANOTHER 5,000 YEARS...
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867. IN A LAMP, A COMPASS...
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868. OR EVEN THAT STUPID BOOM BOX,
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869. I WOULDN'T CARE.
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870. I JUST WISH...
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871. I COULD HAVE GRANTED YOUR WISH.
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872. I WISH I COULD HAVE FILLED YOUR HEART.
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873. YOU... YOU ARE THE SULTAN'S GOLD, MAX.
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874. I...
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875. I AM KAZAAM.
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876. DO YOU HAVE TO SHINE THAT IN MY EYES?
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877. YOU'RE ALIVE! YOU'RE ALIVE!
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878. PUT ME DOWN, PUT ME DOWN!
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879. I MADE A WISH, AND I GRANTED IT!
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880. PUT ME DOWN! YOU'RE ALIVE!
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881. WHAT WAS THAT?
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882. WHAT'S HAPPENING? I DON'T KNOW.
THIS HAS NEVER HAPPENED BEFORE.
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883. YOU'RE LEAVING.
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884. YOU CAN'T. I HAVEN'T
MADE MY THIRD WISH YET.
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885. BUT YOU DID. YOU WISHED FOR A
SECOND CHANCE FOR YOUR FATHER.
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886. BUT WAIT, I... IT WAS A PERFECT
WISH. IT WAS A WISH FROM YOUR HEART.
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887. - AND NOW IT'S DONE.
- BUT... NO, YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND!
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888. - WHAT'S HAPPENING TO YOU?
- I DON'T KNOW. I JUST FEEL...
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889. I FEEL...
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890. FREE!
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891. YOU... YOU'RE...
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892. YOU... I'M DJINN,
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893. AND I'M FREE.
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894. NO.
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895. KAZAAM... YOU CAN'T. YOU
DON'T NEED ME ANYMORE.
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896. DON'T GO! IN OUR HEARTS, WE'RE ALL DJINN,
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897. AND WE'RE ALL FREE. KAZAAM, YOU CAN'T.
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898. DON'T LEAVE ME. THE POWER...
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899. IS IN... YOUR HEART.
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900. I MAKE A GRAB LIKE THAT AND
YOU DON'T EVEN SAY, "NICE SAVE"?
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901. WHAT HAPPENED? LET'S GO.
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902. MAX? IS HE OKAY? YEAH.
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903. IS HE ALL RIGHT?
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904. MAX, ARE YOU OKAY? MAX! OH!
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905. YOU'RE ALL RIGHT. YOU DID OKAY.
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906. TRAVIS, GET HIM A BLANKET? SURE.
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907. I WAS IN THE BUILDING AND KAZAAM,
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908. HE WAS THERE AND HE TOOK
ME... OKAY, OKAY. OKAY, MAX.
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909. AND HE FLEW AND THEN HE...
IT'S OKAY. IT'S OKAY. IT'S OKAY.
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910. I GOT YOU NOW. OKAY? IT'S OKAY.
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911. I DON'T KNOW WHAT HAPPENED.
ALL OF A SUDDEN, I WAS FREE.
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912. YOUR FRIEND WAS THERE.
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913. HE SAID SOMETHING ABOUT A SECOND CHANCE.
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914. YOU'RE A GOOD KID, MAX.
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915. YOU GOT A GOOD HEART.
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916. LOOK, THERE'S A FEW
THINGS I GOTTA TAKE CARE OF.
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917. SOME PEOPLE I OWE. EXCUSE ME.
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918. IS THERE A NICK MATTEO HERE?
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919. THAT'D BE ME.
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920. WOULD YOU JUST GIVE ME A MINUTE?
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921. LOOK, WHEN I COME
BACK, I'D LIKE TO SEE YOU.
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922. WE CAN GET TOGETHER AND, I DON'T KNOW,
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923. GET A COUPLE RODS AND GO FISHING.
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924. SOUNDS LIKE A PLAN TO ME.
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925. IF THAT'S ALL RIGHT WITH YOU.
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926. THANKS.
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927. ARE YOU OKAY WITH THIS, MAX?
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928. HEY, MOM. YEAH?
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929. CAN WE GO HOME NOW? SURE WE CAN.
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930. COME ON. HEY!
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931. YOU COMING OR WHAT?
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932. YOU TALKIN' TO ME?
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933. OKAY.
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934. ARE YOU SURE YOU WANT TO MARRY
THIS GUY? WELL, THAT'S THE PLAN.
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935. LET ME TELL YOU SOMETHING. I'VE BEEN DEALING
WITH THIS WOMAN FOR 12 STRAIGHT YEARS.
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936. NOW, WE'RE TALKIN' THREE BATHS A WEEK,
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937. TRASH DETAIL, CLEANING YOUR
ROOM. WAIT A MINUTE, WAIT A MINUTE.
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938. THREE BATHS A WEEK? MM-HMM. WITH SOAP.
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939. THAT'S COLD. SPEAKING OF WHICH, I COULD
SURE USE A NICE HOT CUP OF CHOCOLATE.
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940. YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND. I'M FREE!
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941. FREE TO DO WHAT? I GOT PLANS.
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942. THE ONLY PLANS YOU GOT ARE
TO GROW OLD AND DIE WITH ME.
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943. YOU MUST NOT REALIZE WHO I
AM. IF YOU BLINK, I DISAPPEAR.
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944. GET REAL. YOU'RE GETTING A JOB. A JOB?
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945. HEY, HEY, HOLD ON, HOLD ON. A
JOB? I AIN'T WORKED IN 5,000 YEARS.
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946. WELL, TH-THERE'S A FIRST
TIME FOR EVERYTHING.
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947. I AIN'T WORKIN'.
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