1. Let me guess, we're outta gas.
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2. Nice try, buster.
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3. By gum, Sally, do you really think
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4. I'd try and pull a fast one like that?
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5. To play a little backseat bingo?
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6. You bet your fern I do.
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7. Backseat bingo?
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8. Geez, you really are
too much, Sally Jenkins.
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9. Ah, it really is beautiful.
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10. Just like you.
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11. Oh, Jerry, you're the most.
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12. And you're the rest.
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13. Come here, my little flower petal.
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14. Let's neck.
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15. Jerry Mitchell!
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16. If I wanted to go steady with an animal,
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17. I would be at the zoo right now.
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18. Come on, Sally, we've been
going steady for three months.
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19. Don't you think it's time we
took things a bit further?
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20. Is that all you boys think
about, going all the way?
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21. Woah, slow down Speedy Gonzales.
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22. Who said anything about going
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23. - all the way?
- That's what you
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24. - were thinking.
- No, it's just,
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25. well, I love you, Sally.
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26. And there's so much of you that I love,
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27. and I just think that if you
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28. maybe let me get to
know other parts of you
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29. that I could learn to love them too.
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30. Like, you know, for example, your chest.
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31. Oh, I'm sure, well, it would start here,
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32. and then pretty soon,
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33. you'd have my dress over
my head, Perv Griffin.
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34. No, no, never, I would never.
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35. I mean, would that really
be such a bad thing?
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36. - Jerry Mitchell!
- What?
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37. Just what kind of a
girl do you take me for?
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38. Sally!
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39. Come on, we're not kids.
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40. People our age make it, it's normal.
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41. I don't know anyone who's made it.
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42. Well, sure you do.
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43. - Who?
- Paula Goldie.
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44. Paula Goldie?
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45. That's balderdash.
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46. With Ian Stuart.
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47. Paula and Ian?
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48. You're full of beans.
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49. Sally, Sally where ya going?
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50. We're miles from town.
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51. If I get back in the car,
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52. do you promise to take me straight home?
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53. Sure, whatever you want.
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54. And I don't wanna hear any more
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55. of your dirty lies about naughty behavior.
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56. I know Paula, and she would
never let anyone do that to her.
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57. She's a nice, respectable girl.
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58. Paula and Ian, really?
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59. All the way?
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60. To the moon and back.
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61. Okay, above the waist
and over the clothes
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62. and any funny business and I'll
feed you a knuckle sandwich.
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63. Woah, Houston get ready for lift off!
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64. What, I stayed above
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65. - the waist.
- No, it wasn't that.
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66. Did you hear something?
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67. Sure, your moans of passion.
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68. No, no, no, I'm serious,
I think I heard something.
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69. You're just thinking of
those old campfire stories.
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70. Two lovers at Make-out Point,
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71. an escaped mental
patient, hook for a hand.
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72. Oh, could you just get
out and take a look around?
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73. Come on, I'm so very frightened.
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74. Well, if it'll make ya feel better.
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75. Hello?
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76. Hello, anyone?
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77. Mr. Boogieman?
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78. That's not funny, Jerry.
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79. Hello?
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80. - There's nobody out here.
- Just keep looking.
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81. There's nothing out here, Sally.
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82. Keep looking, Jerry.
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83. Jerry?
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84. Jerry?
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85. Jerry, don't kid with me, I'm
really, really frightened.
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86. Jerry!
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87. Jerry, if you're fooling
with me than I swear to gosh,
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88. I will never, ever forgive you.
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89. Jerry.
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90. Jerry.
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91. Jerry Mitchell!
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92. How could you scare me like that?
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93. I hate you, I hate you,
I hate you forever!
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94. Come on, Sally, it was just a goof.
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95. Hey, do you smell something?
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96. Climb it, Tarzan.
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97. It was just a goof,
Sally, don't lose your head.
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98. Footprints in the jello, what a gas!
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99. Mary Beth Pruitt, you
are too much, too much.
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100. Curtis told it to me.
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101. Isn't the most?
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102. And then some.
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103. But you know what would
really be the most?
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104. Getting Ricky Nelson to
perform at the spring formal?
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105. Guess again, mother hen.
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106. Well geez, Sally, I just don't know.
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107. If you and Curtis.
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108. Sally, must you always?
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109. We are just friends.
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110. You spend every waking second together.
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111. - So?
- Sew buttons.
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112. Mary Beth Pruitt, you've
got toys in the attic.
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113. Look at him, do you really mean to tell me
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114. you don't find him just dreamy.
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115. Hey Curtis, did you hear
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116. about Ian Stuart and Paula Goldie?
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117. Yeah, they're going
steady, everybody knows that.
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118. Hey, not just going steady.
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119. They took their
relationship a bit further.
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120. He gave her his ring?
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121. No, you dummy, they
broke the sound barrier.
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122. In a high speed jet, neato!
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123. Oh yeah, wouldn't that
have been somethin'.
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124. Wait, do you think that I mean
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125. that they literally
broke the sound barrier?
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126. Aw Curtis, you're thicker than a $5 malt.
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127. They made it.
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128. They, they made it?
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129. Look, made what?
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130. Why don't you just tell me what you mean?
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131. Wait, Ian and Paula,
they made it, made it?
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132. Like all the way?
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133. Ladies and gentlemen, we have a winner.
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134. Let the contestant know what he won.
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135. But, but Ian and Paula, how?
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136. Oh Curtis, if I have to tell
ya that, I don't know how,
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137. No, but I, I mean, I mean how?
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138. I don't know, I didn't
read the fine print.
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139. I just know that it happened.
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140. And while we're on the subject,
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141. what about you and Mary Beth?
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142. What about us?
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143. Well.
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144. - Jiminy no!
- Have you?
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145. Mary Beth and I are just friends.
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146. Just friends, get real!
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147. What do you think, I just
landed here from Uranus?
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148. Three root beer floats.
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149. - Thank you, sir.
- That'll be 45 cents, boys.
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150. Oh hey, Mary Beth, you should tell Jerry
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151. that joke you told me earlier.
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152. Wait till you hear this,
Jerry, it's positively boss.
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153. Oh well, Curtis told it to
me, so maybe he should tell it.
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154. Oh no, go ahead, Mary Beth, you tell it.
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155. Oh, I don't wanna take your spotlight.
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156. Oh, it's okay, Mary Beth, go on.
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157. It's just that you tell it so well.
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158. Can one of you just
tell the gosh darn thing
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159. while Kennedy's still
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160. - in office?
- Jerry, language!
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161. Sorry, tulip.
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162. Okay, well, the joke is, how do you know
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163. when an elephant's been
in your refrigerator?
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164. I give up.
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165. Because of the foot—
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166. Solid pages, man.
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167. I'm begging your pardon?
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168. That book, solid.
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169. Do you swing to the beats, man?
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170. Oh, well, my mom always
says, "Eat your vegetables."
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171. Oh, I dig it, beats,
vegetables, you're a big tickle.
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172. I like your vibe, man.
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173. - What's your moniker?
- I don't play the harmonica.
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174. What do they call you?
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175. Oh, Curtis, I'm Curtis Albright.
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176. Finn Potter, pleased to meet you.
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177. Hey, I just had an illumination, man.
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178. And that's me and you
gettin' down sometime.
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179. I love getting down.
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180. Groovy, tomorrow, the Greasy Cheetah,
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181. - nine chimes in the dim.
- Nine chimes?
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182. Solid.
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183. What just happened?
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184. I think you just made plans to hang out
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185. with Finn Potter at the
Greasy Cheetah tomorrow.
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186. Nine chimes?
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187. I didn't understand a single
word of that conversation.
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188. Neither did I, and I was having it.
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189. What's the book?
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190. Oh, it's just some book from
the free box at the library.
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191. Just thought it looked interesting.
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192. You thought the girl on the cover
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193. looked interesting, Peter Perv.
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194. By gum, Curtis, is that really
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195. the kind of girl you go for?
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196. Jiminy no, Mary Beth, I,
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197. What kind of girl is it
that you go for, huh Curtis?
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198. Yeah!
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199. What kind of girl?
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200. - That we need to know.
- Tell us.
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201. Let us know.
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202. What kind of girl is it?
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203. Curtis is gonna
get married, have babies
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204. with what kind of girl,
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205. if the girl on the cover is like that?
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206. Off the Road?
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207. Off the Road?
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208. Curtis the pervist.
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209. - I mean, across the room.
- Little Curtis, little Curtis
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210. he doesn't know who.
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211. Shout it from the rooftops.
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212. Jiminy Cricket, just tell—
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213. Eww!
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214. Your elephant joke was a big hit.
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215. I guess.
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216. Jerry and Sally,
they're pretty goofy, huh?
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217. I guess.
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218. Do you wanna put our
underpants on our head
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219. and sing Earth Angel into that mailbox?
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220. I guess.
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221. Hello, ground control to Curtis.
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222. Come in, Curtis.
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223. Why are you such a space cadet tonight?
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224. Look, we've been friends for
a long time, right Mary Beth?
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225. We sure have.
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226. Well, do you think that maybe two people
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227. who have been friends their
entire lives could ever become,
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228. I don't know, somethin' else?
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229. Like what, enemies?
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230. Well, I suppose,
- No, I didn't mean,
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231. like I just, never mind.
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232. That's your house.
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233. I know where I live, Captain Obvious.
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234. Sheesh, what is with you?
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235. Look, I'm sorry Mary Beth.
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236. I guess I'm just tired.
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237. I'll call you later?
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238. Okay, see you later, gator.
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239. After while, crocodile.
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240. Oh man.
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241. Curtis, Harold, breakfast.
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242. Coming, ma!
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243. Harold, breakfast!
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244. Harold, breakfast!
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245. Coming dear.
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246. Looks great, Dana.
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247. Yeah, mom.
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248. What is that smell?
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249. You don't smell that?
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250. No, I don't smell nothin' but
these hot buttery flapjacks.
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251. Looks like the commies
are getting pretty hinky
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252. down in Southeast Asia,
place called Vietnam.
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253. Must we talk about
such unpleasant things
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254. at the breakfast table?
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255. Aw, don't worry about it, sugar bun.
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256. It won't amount to much.
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257. We'll send a couple of
good, strong US Troops there
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258. and that'll be that.
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259. I'm sure you're right, dear.
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260. So Curtis, any big plans today?
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261. Yeah, I was gonna meet a new
friend at the Greasy Cheetah.
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262. Over my dead body are you
going to the Greasy Cheetah.
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263. They serve liquor drinks there and those
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264. funny smelling cigarettes.
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265. Which hooligan has you
going to this den of sin?
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266. Just a new friend, I
don't know him that well.
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267. - Um, Finn Potter.
- Potter, eh?
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268. I wonder if that's old Harold's boy.
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269. That stands to reason.
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270. I've got Harold in the
slammer about every other day.
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271. Betcha the apple doesn't
fall far from the tree.
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272. Young man, I.
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273. Young man, I forbid.
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274. What is that smell?
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275. Hmm, what is that smell?
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276. - I don't smell anything.
- Smells like a skunk.
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277. Yes, exactly.
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278. Oh, Turbo must've sprayed last night.
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279. Well, Curtis, looks like
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280. you'll have to take
Turbo to see Dr. Nancy.
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281. I, Dr. Nancy?
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282. Yes, Curtis, Turbo's vet.
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283. Ma, you don't have to
take a dog to the vet
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284. just 'cause it needs a bath.
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285. Curtis Delano Roosevelt Albright.
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286. Sorry, sir.
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287. Come on, Turbo.
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288. Let's go, come on.
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289. If I gave my mother lip like that,
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290. she'd have had me skinned alive.
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291. Oh Harold, he's just a boy.
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292. Are you givin' me lip now too?
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293. As a matter of fact, I am, two.
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294. Grrrr.
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295. I've been bad, officer.
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296. I need you to take me
upstairs and frisk me.
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297. I think this calls for
a full body cavity search.
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298. Lovely to see you again, Carol.
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299. We'll see you in two weeks.
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300. Goodbye, Mr. Wiggles.
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301. Hi, we're here to see Dr. Nancy.
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302. All right.
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303. Jiminy, what's wrong?
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304. You have been marked.
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305. - I'm sorry?
- Segonku.
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306. - Begging your pardon?
- Segonku.
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307. Still didn't get it that time either.
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308. You have been marked
by the one who squirts.
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309. Okay, well, we're gonna go ahead
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310. and go in to see Dr. Nancy.
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311. Ooh!
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312. Not much I can do for skunk.
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313. It's not really a medical condition.
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314. I tried telling them that,
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315. but they told me to
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316. - bring him anyway.
- Hmm, parents.
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317. You could say that again.
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318. Parents.
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319. Have you tried a tomato juice bath.
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320. I sure did.
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321. Well, do you want my
professional advice?
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322. That'd be swell.
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323. As a professional veterinarian,
my educated opinion is
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324. leave him outside until
the smell wears off.
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325. Well, since you're here anyway,
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326. we may as well give him a quick check up.
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327. It must be skunk season.
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328. I had a skunk outside my
window last night too.
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329. - You don't say.
- I do say.
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330. I was gettin' ready for beddy bye,
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331. and I heard a commotion outside my window.
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332. - You don't say.
- I do say.
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333. At first, I thought it was a peeping tom.
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334. I was gettin' ready to call your father,
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335. as a matter of fact.
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336. - You don't say.
- I do say.
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337. But then, that smell of skunk
hit, and I knew for suresies.
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338. Turbo's heart sounds pretty good.
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339. Here, come here.
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340. You wanna hear what your
pooch's ticker sounds like?
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341. There.
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342. Hear that?
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343. Ba boom.
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344. Ba boom.
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345. Ba boom.
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346. Ba boom.
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347. Ba boom.
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348. Ba boom.
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349. I gotta go!
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350. Oh, but the checkup isn't done yet.
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351. I'm late for my boobs,
I mean, my piano lesson.
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352. Odd boy.
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353. What do you see, McMinamin?
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354. Nothing extraordinary, Smith.
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355. Lazarus 17 is within two mutt ducks
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356. of Pluto's difuganus orbit.
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357. The spinning hyabootha is,
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358. Egad!
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359. What is it, McMinimin?
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360. I'm not sure.
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361. I'm gonna need a close
examination of Uranus.
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362. By all means, McMinimin.
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363. So, she's leanin' over you
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364. with her chest melons hangin' out
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365. and you decide to play the trouser tuba?
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366. I didn't decide.
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367. It just happened.
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368. I've never experienced
anything like it before.
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369. Her things were in my face,
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370. and I was overwhelmed by this feeling.
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371. And you busted a butt burp.
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372. Shhh!
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373. I didn't feel it coming.
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374. It just came out.
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375. Oh Curtis, you are too much.
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376. That's the most choice
story I've ever heard.
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377. Drop dead twice, Jerry Mitchell.
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378. Why, so I can look like you?
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379. Shhh!
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380. It's useless, McMinimin, the
Urination is gaining on us.
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381. Get ahold of yourself,
woman, you're hysterical.
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382. So you ready for your hot date
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383. with that wackadoo, Finn Potter?
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384. My dad forbid me.
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385. You do everything
your old man tells you?
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386. Well, yeah, he's my old man.
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387. You're such a nerd.
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388. I'm not a nerd.
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389. Are too a nerd.
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390. I know you are, but what am I?
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391. I know you are, but what am I?
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392. I know you are, but what am I?
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393. I know you are, but what am I?
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394. I know you are, but what am I?
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395. I know you are, but what am I?
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396. Shhh!
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397. Shhh!
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398. I know you are, but what am I, infinity.
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399. Dang it!
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400. All my degrees and scientific knowledge,
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401. yet I'm rendered powerless by Uranus.
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402. Don't feel bad, McMinimin,
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403. you're certainly not the first man
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404. to succumb to the allure of my anus.
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405. Uranus.
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406. That's what I said.
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407. There's a meteor shower tonight,
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408. and I'm takin' Sally up to the Point.
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409. A meteor shower, boy that sounds neato!
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410. Not neato, bingo!
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411. As in backseat bingo.
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412. Wait, you mean you're gonna, with?
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413. Exactamundo kemosabe,
and speakin' of which,
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414. you should take Mary
Beth up there sometime.
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415. No, McMinimin, do something.
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416. Oh, this is horrible, it's too horrible.
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417. Oh god, no, it's horrible.
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418. Oh no, no, no!
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419. Oh god, no!
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420. Oh!
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421. Don't look straight into it.
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422. - Albright residence.
- Candid Camera's on
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423. in a few minutes, you
wanna come over and watch?
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424. My mom made popcorn.
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425. Gee, Mary Beth, that sounds swell,
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426. but I'm going down on Finn Potter tonight.
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427. I think the term was get down with.
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428. I don't think so.
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429. Oh Curtis, you're not
gonna go out with that creep.
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430. A lot of undesirables hang
out at the Greasy Cheetah.
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431. I'm surprised your
father's letting you go.
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432. Well, he's not exactly.
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433. Oh Curtis, you're not
gonna defy your father!
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434. He'll tan your hide!
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435. - Not if he doesn't find out.
- I don't know, Curtis.
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436. This doesn't sound like you, this is a—
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437. Sorry, Mary Beth, gotta go!
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438. Come in.
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439. Your mother and I are going to bed.
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440. Okay, goodnight.
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441. Not too much later for you either.
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442. - It's almost 8:30.
- Yes, sir.
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443. You really ought to put Turbo outside.
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444. I think that smell's getting worse.
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445. Yeah, sure will, pop.
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446. Curtis, don't let the bed bugs bite.
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447. - Hey, big boy.
- Oh, hey.
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448. You lookin' for a good time?
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449. Sure am.
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450. Oh, there it is, the Greasy Cheetah!
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451. Hey, the man actually made the scene.
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452. What's the tale nightingale?
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453. This way.
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454. - Who's the Clyde?
- He ain't no Clyde, Jack.
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455. He's got his boots on.
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456. Curtis, this is Charlie.
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457. Didn't you just call him Jack?
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458. It's what you call somebody who'd hip.
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459. - You call him Jack.
- What's buzzin' with
Copy !req
460. - this Clyde, Jack?
- Ooh, cut the gas, pops.
Copy !req
461. He's cool, dig?
Copy !req
462. Why don't you two cats slide your jib.
Copy !req
463. I'm gonna caller up some brews.
Copy !req
464. Curtis, why don't you mash
me up a couple a G-Dubs?
Copy !req
465. - Mash you up a couple of?
- I got you.
Copy !req
466. Solid, Manson.
Copy !req
467. Look, just so I don't seem
Copy !req
468. like a complete Clyde next
time, what's a Manson?
Copy !req
469. Well, me.
Copy !req
470. Oh, I thought you were Charlie.
Copy !req
471. Oh.
Copy !req
472. I dig.
Copy !req
473. Yeah, you dig.
Copy !req
474. I, uh, swing to that.
Copy !req
475. Listen, man, don't bust
your conk tryin' to fit.
Copy !req
476. Hep cats'll peep right through ya.
Copy !req
477. You come in, talk to the bricks,
Copy !req
478. kickin' jive like you're
schooled five ticks ago.
Copy !req
479. It's a circus.
Copy !req
480. Man, I don't care what Finn's
layin' down, you's a Clyde.
Copy !req
481. I'm not a Clyde.
Copy !req
482. Are those beers?
Copy !req
483. Finn Potter, we're not
old enough to drink those.
Copy !req
484. Then I stand corrected,
he's not a Clyde at all.
Copy !req
485. Oh yeah.
Copy !req
486. Well, would a Clyde do this?
Copy !req
487. He even drinkin' that?
Copy !req
488. I have a joke.
Copy !req
489. How do you know when an
elephant's been in your fridge?
Copy !req
490. Because of the footprints in the jello!
Copy !req
491. The footprints in the.
Copy !req
492. Well, well, cast an eyeball on that.
Copy !req
493. I gotta trilly, boys.
Copy !req
494. Makin' designs on the pigeon over there.
Copy !req
495. Jiminy, sure was neato to
make your acquaintance.
Copy !req
496. What's sliding his jib?
Copy !req
497. Well, that made no sense.
Copy !req
498. But if you're askin' why's he's so salty,
Copy !req
499. that's just his trip, man.
Copy !req
500. Check him out, this'll blow your wig.
Copy !req
501. Same show every night.
Copy !req
502. Find some little birdie,
runaways and addicts mostly.
Copy !req
503. Takes 'em up to his ranch,
Copy !req
504. got a whole little army of lost birdies
Copy !req
505. - up there.
- What for?
Copy !req
506. Preppin' 'em for a killin'
spree for all I know.
Copy !req
507. Who knows?
Copy !req
508. What about you, man?
Copy !req
509. You ballin' that paper shaker?
Copy !req
510. - Paper shaker?
- Sis boom bah, rah rah.
Copy !req
511. Mary Beth!
Copy !req
512. Hmm, that bird's got a classy chassis.
Copy !req
513. May I tell you something?
Copy !req
514. Thrill me.
Copy !req
515. I have no idea what you're
saying most of the time.
Copy !req
516. I dig it, okay.
Copy !req
517. Let me slow it down for you for a minute.
Copy !req
518. You and Mary Beth, you two?
Copy !req
519. Jiminy, no!
Copy !req
520. Mary Beth's not that kinda girl.
Copy !req
521. - She's not like that.
- I got a newsflash for ya,
Copy !req
522. bro hump.
Copy !req
523. They are all that type of girl.
Copy !req
524. Dig this, go over to her pad
right now, give it a shot.
Copy !req
525. I can't, I mean, for
starters, she'll be sleeping.
Copy !req
526. Well, she's pilin'
up a couple Zs, no big.
Copy !req
527. Toss a couple pebbles at
her window, wake her up,
Copy !req
528. she comes out, tell her that
she razzes your berries.
Copy !req
529. Make your move.
Copy !req
530. Do you really think so?
Copy !req
531. Fat city, man.
Copy !req
532. Mary Beth Pruitt,
Copy !req
533. will you be my steady?
Copy !req
534. Hello?
Copy !req
535. Someone there?
Copy !req
536. Sorry, I'm looking
for Mary Beth's window.
Copy !req
537. What's going
on out there, Marvin, trouble?
Copy !req
538. No, it's fine honey.
Copy !req
539. Just some stranger tryin' to
get into our daughter's bedroom
Copy !req
540. - in the middle of the night.
- Okay, then.
Copy !req
541. It's the uh, it's the
other window over there.
Copy !req
542. Oh, okay, thank you.
Copy !req
543. Cocksucking motherfucker!
Copy !req
544. Mary Beth!
Copy !req
545. Curtis, what's the big idea?
Copy !req
546. This is your idea of a joke?
Copy !req
547. Sneaking around in the middle of the night
Copy !req
548. throwing rocks at people's heads?
Copy !req
549. I didn't mean to, I was just.
Copy !req
550. I, I wanted to tell you something.
Copy !req
551. Well, go on, spill it.
Copy !req
552. You really razz my berries.
Copy !req
553. What's that supposed to mean?
Copy !req
554. I don't know, I think it means you're a,
Copy !req
555. you're a happenin' bird
with a classy chassis.
Copy !req
556. Curtis, are you even speaking English?
Copy !req
557. You sound like that Finn.
Copy !req
558. So, that's it, you went
to the Greasy Cheetah
Copy !req
559. with Finn Potter, and now
you're acting all cooky.
Copy !req
560. Look, in English,
Copy !req
561. I like you.
Copy !req
562. I like you.
Copy !req
563. No, but, I mean like, I really like you.
Copy !req
564. I really like you too.
Copy !req
565. Okay, so, well, all
right, what I'm trying to,
Copy !req
566. right, okay, well, so, okay, ready?
Copy !req
567. - All right.
- Oh, for crying out loud.
Copy !req
568. - What's wrong?
- Well, I, I should go!
Copy !req
569. I, it's late.
Copy !req
570. But you're still coming
over tomorrow to study, right?
Copy !req
571. Yes, absolutely, tomorrow, study!
Copy !req
572. Later gator.
Copy !req
573. No!
Copy !req
574. No!
Copy !req
575. Jerry Mitchell!
Copy !req
576. What kind of a girl do you take me for?
Copy !req
577. Sally, come on.
Copy !req
578. We're not kids, people our
age make it, it's normal.
Copy !req
579. I don't know
anyone who's made it.
Copy !req
580. There's gonna be
some big changes around here
Copy !req
581. when I'm sheriff, big changes.
Copy !req
582. What, you don't believe me?
Copy !req
583. I'm sure
Copy !req
584. - there will.
- Yeah there sure will
Copy !req
585. be some big changes.
Copy !req
586. When I'm sheriff, things
will be a lot different
Copy !req
587. around here, Officer Maggie.
Copy !req
588. You can take that to
the bank and deposit it.
Copy !req
589. Will do, Deputy Gary.
Copy !req
590. Gonna have a whole
new era, whole new era.
Copy !req
591. What, it won't be dawn of a whole new era?
Copy !req
592. - Vehicle up ahead.
- Yeah, I see it.
Copy !req
593. You don't think I see that
big old boat in front of me?
Copy !req
594. Looks like a Wake Up Little Suzy.
Copy !req
595. A wake up hom in a what?
Copy !req
596. Wake Up Little
Suzy, it's a pop record
Copy !req
597. about two kids who accidentally
fall asleep on a date.
Copy !req
598. They have to figure out
Copy !req
599. how to explain—
- I know what a Wake Up
Copy !req
600. Litty Suzy is!
Copy !req
601. Goddamn waste of my time over here.
Copy !req
602. You know, back in the city, I was,
Copy !req
603. I was wakin' up motorcycle gangs
Copy !req
604. and going after bank robbers
Copy !req
605. and going head to head with murderers.
Copy !req
606. Yeah, now they got me here in the sticks,
Copy !req
607. hasslin' little bitty
teenagers, oh mother of god!
Copy !req
608. Are you okay?
Copy !req
609. Stop it.
Copy !req
610. Albright residence.
Copy !req
611. Harold, telephone.
Copy !req
612. Be right there, sugar puss.
Copy !req
613. Albright.
Copy !req
614. What's that?
Copy !req
615. You say this Wally Jenkins,
Sally Jenkin's father?
Copy !req
616. What's that?
Copy !req
617. You say Sally didn't come home last night?
Copy !req
618. What's that?
Copy !req
619. You say the boy she goes with,
Copy !req
620. Jerry Mitchell didn't come home either?
Copy !req
621. I'll be on it first thing.
Copy !req
622. Goodbye, Wally.
Copy !req
623. Well, I sure do hope
everything's all right.
Copy !req
624. Oh, it's probably nothing.
Copy !req
625. I bet you they fell
asleep at the drive-in.
Copy !req
626. I've seen it a hundred times.
Copy !req
627. No wait, 97 times.
Copy !req
628. Oh, that still is a lotta times.
Copy !req
629. It's a lotta times, almost a hundred.
Copy !req
630. Should be at a hundred
by the end a the year.
Copy !req
631. - Morning ma, pa.
- Where are you runnin'
Copy !req
632. off to so fast, young man?
Copy !req
633. Oh, I'm supposed to be
studying with Mary Beth.
Copy !req
634. I'm late, I must've overslept, or—
Copy !req
635. Curtis, before you go.
Copy !req
636. You've been hanging out
Copy !req
637. with that Mitchell boy quite a bit, Jerry?
Copy !req
638. Sure, pop, he's a real swell guy.
Copy !req
639. Yeah, well, do you happen to know
Copy !req
640. where he may have gone last night?
Copy !req
641. Yup, he went up to the Point
Copy !req
642. to make it with Sally Jenkins.
Copy !req
643. No, sir, why?
Copy !req
644. He just didn't come
home last night is all.
Copy !req
645. Neither did that Jenkins
girl he goes with.
Copy !req
646. They probably just fell asleep.
Copy !req
647. At the drive-in.
Copy !req
648. Or, they're still up at the Point
Copy !req
649. making it with each other.
Copy !req
650. Yup, I'm sure that's it.
Copy !req
651. I gotta go.
Copy !req
652. Let us know if you hear
from the Mitchell boy.
Copy !req
653. If he's not too busy
makin' it with Sally Jenkins.
Copy !req
654. Sure will, pop.
Copy !req
655. Whoa, whoa, excuse me?
Copy !req
656. Oh, I said, sure will, pop.
Copy !req
657. No, the part before that,
Copy !req
658. something about someone making
something with somebody?
Copy !req
659. Oh gee, pop, I'm sure I don't know.
Copy !req
660. Hmm, see ya!
Copy !req
661. Odd boy.
Copy !req
662. Think he gets it from you.
Copy !req
663. Probably.
Copy !req
664. Albright residence.
Copy !req
665. Is that you, Gary?
Copy !req
666. Gary, Gary, Gary.
Copy !req
667. Gary, calm down, Gary.
Copy !req
668. Gary, Gary, where are you, Gary?
Copy !req
669. Don't move, Gary.
Copy !req
670. I'm on my way, Gary.
Copy !req
671. Well, who was it?
Copy !req
672. It was Gary.
Copy !req
673. - Is everything okay?
- Oh heck if I know,
Copy !req
674. but I better go check out
what the hullabaloo is about.
Copy !req
675. Right now?
Copy !req
676. I was about to turn myself in.
Copy !req
677. I've been bad.
Copy !req
678. You need to take me into custody.
Copy !req
679. You have the right to remain sexy.
Copy !req
680. Anything you say will be held
Copy !req
681. against you in the marital bed.
Copy !req
682. You have a right to an attorney,
Copy !req
683. if you feel someone needs to watch.
Copy !req
684. Where you trillyin' bro hump?
Copy !req
685. What?
Copy !req
686. Oh, Finn!
Copy !req
687. Fine, thanks.
Copy !req
688. Who's your friend, Finny?
Copy !req
689. Yeah, he's cute.
Copy !req
690. Hop in, man.
Copy !req
691. I can't, I've got this big
Copy !req
692. arithmetic exam I'm studyin' for.
Copy !req
693. You always this Earthbound, Jack?
Copy !req
694. Come on, lover boy.
Copy !req
695. I'll make it worth your while.
Copy !req
696. Hop in, man, you need to
even out the ratio here, dig?
Copy !req
697. Um.
Copy !req
698. Well, where you guys going anyway?
Copy !req
699. Old Man Knickerbocker's pool.
Copy !req
700. Wait, you know Old Man Knickerbocker?
Copy !req
701. Who says I do?
Copy !req
702. You guys didn't get
invited at all, did you?
Copy !req
703. You're just gonna hop the fence,
Copy !req
704. run around without a lifeguard present.
Copy !req
705. Charlie was right, man.
Copy !req
706. You ain't got your boots on.
Copy !req
707. Go on, Clyde, agitate the gravel.
Copy !req
708. Oh yeah, would a Clyde
do this with his books?
Copy !req
709. Go!
Copy !req
710. Sheriff, just like I said,
Copy !req
711. off to the side with the
top down, you see that?
Copy !req
712. - I see it, Gary.
- Yup.
Copy !req
713. - Nice work.
- I did good work?
Copy !req
714. Yup.
Copy !req
715. Saints Peter, Paul, and Mary.
Copy !req
716. What happened here?
Copy !req
717. It's hard to say, but if I had to guess,
Copy !req
718. I'd say it was some sort of animal—
Copy !req
719. - Animal attack!
- Attack.
Copy !req
720. You heard me first, right?
Copy !req
721. I said animal attack.
Copy !req
722. Animal attack.
Copy !req
723. What kind of animal has this
level of ferocity and power?
Copy !req
724. Well, if you know these parts like me,
Copy !req
725. you know that it was
a, a, probably a deer.
Copy !req
726. This place is lousy with deer.
Copy !req
727. I think it was more likely a bear.
Copy !req
728. You hear that, Sheriff, a bear.
Copy !req
729. A bear, aren't you emBEARassed?
Copy !req
730. Do you have a brain?
Copy !req
731. A bear, a goddamn bear, my god.
Copy !req
732. Bear, where are you?
Copy !req
733. Come and get us!
Copy !req
734. Oh, Officer Genius over here
Copy !req
735. thinks it was a little cuddly,
wuddly, little tiny bear.
Copy !req
736. Oh, bears smell fear.
Copy !req
737. I'm here, you do the math.
Copy !req
738. I tried to take some
samples, but they were useless
Copy !req
739. since Deputy Gag Reflex
got sick all over the DNA.
Copy !req
740. DNA, how do you mean, Margaret?
Copy !req
741. DNA, what, grr, what is that?
Copy !req
742. Well, we need to ID these two.
Copy !req
743. Any idea who they might be?
Copy !req
744. I believe I do.
Copy !req
745. That's what I was afraid of.
Copy !req
746. This car is registered
to Stanley Mitchell.
Copy !req
747. Oh.
Copy !req
748. Oh no.
Copy !req
749. All due respect, Sheriff,
Copy !req
750. I know Stanley Mitchell better
than I'd like to and I'm uh
Copy !req
751. pretty sure that he's about 25 years older
Copy !req
752. than the boy belongin' to this head.
Copy !req
753. It's not Stanley.
Copy !req
754. It's his son.
Copy !req
755. - Son.
- Jerry.
Copy !req
756. It's his son, Jerry Mitchell.
Copy !req
757. It's his son, Jerry Mitchell.
Copy !req
758. Dollars to donuts, you find out
Copy !req
759. who Jerry Mitchell's sweetie is,
Copy !req
760. and you will identify the girl.
Copy !req
761. That girl is Walter Jenkins—
Copy !req
762. The girl is Walter Jenkins?
Copy !req
763. The girls I Walter Jenkins' daughter.
Copy !req
764. Daughter.
Copy !req
765. - Sally—
- Sally Jenkins
Copy !req
766. is here, guaranteed.
Copy !req
767. Sally and Jerry sittin'
in a tree, K-I-S-S-I-N-G.
Copy !req
768. So uh, pretty sure my work is done here.
Copy !req
769. So, I'm gonna keep it movin'
Copy !req
770. and you two can dilly
dally all over the details,
Copy !req
771. but I'm pretty sure I solved the mystery.
Copy !req
772. So, I'm gonna go have me a Tom Collins.
Copy !req
773. Shoot low,
Jack, it's high octane.
Copy !req
774. What is it?
Copy !req
775. Just a bit of lunatic soup.
Copy !req
776. So, how was the scene
with the paper shaker?
Copy !req
777. You get a little stank on your dangler?
Copy !req
778. A little what on my what now?
Copy !req
779. Did ya make it with her?
Copy !req
780. Well, I don't know.
Copy !req
781. If you stormed the
cotton gin, you'd remember.
Copy !req
782. Yeah, but see, that's the thing.
Copy !req
783. I don't remember anything.
Copy !req
784. I remember going over her house,
Copy !req
785. and I remember throwing
a rock at her face.
Copy !req
786. Then she came to the window—
- Woah, dial back, Jack.
Copy !req
787. You pitched ground at her grill?
Copy !req
788. No, I threw a rock at her face.
Copy !req
789. Anyway, I was there to, you know,
Copy !req
790. give her my class ring and
ask her to be my steady.
Copy !req
791. To be your steady?
Copy !req
792. And you gave her your class ring?
Copy !req
793. Well, not exactly.
Copy !req
794. That's the thing, it just goes blank.
Copy !req
795. Next thing I know, it's morning.
Copy !req
796. You know, it must've been
all that foam we guzzled.
Copy !req
797. I ain't never heard of a cat
Copy !req
798. gettin' that butt toasted
off half a brew-doggy.
Copy !req
799. Aw, leave him alone, Finn.
Copy !req
800. Hey, who wants to go swimmin'?
Copy !req
801. Me!
Copy !req
802. How 'bout you stee?
Copy !req
803. Wanna go swimmin'?
Copy !req
804. Well, sure, but we
don't have any trunks.
Copy !req
805. Trunks?
Copy !req
806. Swim trunks?
Copy !req
807. What do you need swim trunks for?
Copy !req
808. - Come on.
- To swim.
Copy !req
809. Show us what you got.
Copy !req
810. Show us what you got.
Copy !req
811. Oops, oops-a-daisy.
Copy !req
812. My man.
Copy !req
813. Jiminy!
Copy !req
814. Dr. Nancy, do these bites or scratches
Copy !req
815. look at all familiar to you?
Copy !req
816. I don't know, I'm not sure.
Copy !req
817. I'm sorry, I just don't know
what could've done this.
Copy !req
818. Could it have been a bear?
Copy !req
819. No bear that I've ever seen.
Copy !req
820. A bear?
Copy !req
821. What about a deer?
Copy !req
822. Well, to be honest,
Copy !req
823. the markings most
resemble that of a skunk,
Copy !req
824. but we'd be talkin' about an
impossibly large skunk here.
Copy !req
825. I'm sorry I couldn't be more helpful.
Copy !req
826. It's okay, Dr. Nancy.
Copy !req
827. Oh, I hope you find what did this.
Copy !req
828. Of course, thank you
again for your time.
Copy !req
829. Well, looks like we gotta get back
Copy !req
830. to the drawin' board, right Sheriff?
Copy !req
831. You know, go back to the beginnin',
Copy !req
832. look at it all from a different angle.
Copy !req
833. You know, 'cause I'm
thinkin' maybe it wasn't
Copy !req
834. a ground animal but a sky
animal, like maybe a seagull.
Copy !req
835. We can make a list of all the animals
Copy !req
836. known to inhabit these woods
Copy !req
837. and then do a Google image
search for their markings.
Copy !req
838. Hmm.
Copy !req
839. What in blazes is a Google?
Copy !req
840. Um, what?
Copy !req
841. Google?
Copy !req
842. Did I, Google, I don't,
that's a search thing—
Copy !req
843. I have seen it.
Copy !req
844. You look for Segonku.
Copy !req
845. Excuse me?
Copy !req
846. The creature you seek,
Segonku, the one who squirts.
Copy !req
847. Sheriff, this woman is obviously booby
Copy !req
848. - hatch material.
- No, let's hear her out.
Copy !req
849. Yeah, okay, Maggie,
let's hear the lady out.
Copy !req
850. You know this creature?
Copy !req
851. I have seen it.
Copy !req
852. He came in the day before today.
Copy !req
853. The day before today?
Copy !req
854. Oh, uh, yesterday!
Copy !req
855. She means yesterday, Sheriff.
Copy !req
856. Here, this man, he brought
in an animal named Turbo.
Copy !req
857. He is Segonku.
Copy !req
858. You know, Curtis has a dog
named Turbo, same spelling.
Copy !req
859. Brought him here yesterday, too.
Copy !req
860. Boy, that would be a funny coincidence.
Copy !req
861. Oh dear.
Copy !req
862. Deer, I told you it was a deer!
Copy !req
863. They're getting naked.
Copy !req
864. They're just some real wild birds, Jack.
Copy !req
865. Like, radioactive, man.
Copy !req
866. Which ones you got designs on?
Copy !req
867. 'Cause I'm a wide open prairie, so if you,
Copy !req
868. Hey, that hittin' your olfactories, man?
Copy !req
869. I think there might be a
Copy !req
870. skunk.
Copy !req
871. Finally.
Copy !req
872. Sheriff Albright.
Copy !req
873. Good day, Mary Beth.
Copy !req
874. I was just looking for Curtis.
Copy !req
875. He said he came by to study.
Copy !req
876. Is he still here?
Copy !req
877. Still, never was is more like it.
Copy !req
878. Stop your lies!
Copy !req
879. We know you hidin' him.
Copy !req
880. - Gary.
- She's lying, Sheriff.
Copy !req
881. Stifle.
Copy !req
882. Never was?
Copy !req
883. Yes, Sheriff, he was due here
hours ago but never showed.
Copy !req
884. Jeepers, you don't thinks
something's happened to him?
Copy !req
885. Oh, like you don't know.
Copy !req
886. Give him up, or you go in the slammer.
Copy !req
887. - That's enough, Gary.
- But she's lyin', Sheriff.
Copy !req
888. - That's it.
- I'm on to you, little girl.
Copy !req
889. Gary, go wait down by the sidewalk.
Copy !req
890. - No, but that's it, she's a,
- Now!
Copy !req
891. Margaret, go with him, make
sure he stays down there.
Copy !req
892. Come on, Deputy Gary.
Copy !req
893. I'm a be watchin' you.
Copy !req
894. Yeah, well, you got strong eyes,
Copy !req
895. you can see her
Copy !req
896. - from the sidewalk.
- My eyeballs are Super
Copy !req
897. - Deputy strong.
- They're really impressive.
Copy !req
898. When was the last time you saw him?
Copy !req
899. Last night.
Copy !req
900. Mary Beth, Curtis
was at home last night.
Copy !req
901. I told ya she was lyin', Sheriff.
Copy !req
902. You're a liar, little girl.
Copy !req
903. Mary Beth, nobody's
gonna get in trouble,
Copy !req
904. but I do need all the facts.
Copy !req
905. - What time last night?
- Real late, like 10 p.m.
Copy !req
906. 22:00 hours?
Copy !req
907. What was Curtis doing
out at that unholy hour?
Copy !req
908. I never found out,
he was in such a rush.
Copy !req
909. I think on account of the skunk.
Copy !req
910. Skunk?
Copy !req
911. I didn't see it, but
I sure did smell it,
Copy !req
912. right as Curtis left.
Copy !req
913. Mary Beth, can you think of any place
Copy !req
914. that Curtis may have gone
or anybody he might be with?
Copy !req
915. Well, Curtis has been hanging
out with this guy recently,
Copy !req
916. - real creep, if you ask me.
- And who's this guy?
Copy !req
917. Finn Potter.
Copy !req
918. Potter?
Copy !req
919. Don't touch me, no, you wouldn't,
Copy !req
920. no, you stinky skunk.
Copy !req
921. Oh, I'm so scared!
Copy !req
922. What we doin' at Harold Potter's house?
Copy !req
923. Curtis
Copy !req
924. has been spending a lot of
time with his son, Finn lately.
Copy !req
925. Real trouble maker,
something amusing, Margaret?
Copy !req
926. - Harold Potter?
- That's right.
Copy !req
927. - Harry Potter!
- Sure, Harry Potter.
Copy !req
928. Harry Potter.
Copy !req
929. Well, what's the joke?
Copy !req
930. I, Harry Potter, Hermione, and Hogwarts.
Copy !req
931. What am I saying?
Copy !req
932. What is, what is that?
Copy !req
933. That's,
Copy !req
934. You're a strange dame, Margaret.
Copy !req
935. Listen, you two stay here.
Copy !req
936. This one, I have to handle on my own.
Copy !req
937. Potter!
Copy !req
938. Potter!
Copy !req
939. Sheriff Albright, Potter.
Copy !req
940. Better open up this door,
I know you're in there.
Copy !req
941. I'm Sheriff Albright.
Copy !req
942. Open up this door.
Copy !req
943. I know you're in there, Potter.
Copy !req
944. Open up this door or I'll
be forced to kick it in.
Copy !req
945. Potter!
Copy !req
946. Potter, this is your last warning.
Copy !req
947. We got the place surrounded.
Copy !req
948. Going somewhere, Potter?
Copy !req
949. You know, I could have you
arrested for fleeing the law.
Copy !req
950. Well, I didn't do nothin'
Copy !req
951. unless climbin' out a window is illegal.
Copy !req
952. All right, so what do I owe this pleasure?
Copy !req
953. What did I do this time?
Copy !req
954. Oh, it's your luck day, Potter.
Copy !req
955. I'm not here for you.
Copy !req
956. Oh, social call, good then.
Copy !req
957. I think I got some of the
good stuff around here.
Copy !req
958. Let me see, now, where did I put it?
Copy !req
959. You don't mind the bottle, do ya?
Copy !req
960. 'Cause I am fresh outta glasses.
Copy !req
961. Your choice, here it goes.
Copy !req
962. I'm looking for your son.
Copy !req
963. Oh, Harold Jr., that meat head?
Copy !req
964. What the hell he do this time?
Copy !req
965. No, not Harold Jr.
Copy !req
966. Teddy, oh, let me see,
Copy !req
967. some bar maid probably said
Copy !req
968. that he got,
- Not Teddy.
Copy !req
969. - Earl?
- No.
Copy !req
970. - Travis?
- No.
Copy !req
971. - Oh, Zachary, Zachary!
- It's not Zachary either.
Copy !req
972. Not Zachary.
Copy !req
973. - Tobias?
- No.
Copy !req
974. - London?
- No.
Copy !req
975. - Neil?
- No.
Copy !req
976. - Paul?
- No.
Copy !req
977. - Mitch?
- No.
Copy !req
978. Lebron?
Copy !req
979. You don't have a kid named Lebron.
Copy !req
980. Saul?
Copy !req
981. No.
Copy !req
982. - Frank?
- No.
Copy !req
983. - Mario?
- No.
Copy !req
984. Luigi?
Copy !req
985. - Harold Jr. II?
- No.
Copy !req
986. Harold Jr. II Jr.?
Copy !req
987. Finn.
Copy !req
988. Who?
Copy !req
989. Finn.
Copy !req
990. Your son, Finn Potter.
Copy !req
991. Oh, ah, Finn!
Copy !req
992. Okay, I'm sorry.
Copy !req
993. That weirdo, what did he do?
Copy !req
994. Bore somebody to death while
he was readin' his poetry?
Copy !req
995. I'm tired of your games, Potter.
Copy !req
996. Where's Finn?
Copy !req
997. Maybe I don't know.
Copy !req
998. I believe that you do.
Copy !req
999. Well, Harold Jr. II
believes in the Tooth Fairy,
Copy !req
1000. but that doesn't mean she's
gonna come on down here
Copy !req
1001. and get her knees dirty.
Copy !req
1002. All right, that's it.
Copy !req
1003. Up against the roof and spread 'em.
Copy !req
1004. I'm not that kinda girl, Sheriff.
Copy !req
1005. Oh, you don't wanna do this.
Copy !req
1006. Oh, well you ain't leavin'
much choice, now are ya?
Copy !req
1007. You can come quietly.
Copy !req
1008. Well, I ain't never been
one to come quietly, Sheriff.
Copy !req
1009. You can just ask your wife.
Copy !req
1010. Oh, look, there she is!
Copy !req
1011. Hello!
Copy !req
1012. You struck me!
Copy !req
1013. Why did you do that, Harold?
Copy !req
1014. Why did you strike me?
Copy !req
1015. Oh, come on, I didn't hit you that hard.
Copy !req
1016. I never done anything to you, Harold.
Copy !req
1017. Can't stand up.
Copy !req
1018. Sucker!
Copy !req
1019. Oh, my nards!
Copy !req
1020. I ain't ever gonna be
able to have more kids.
Copy !req
1021. Look at that, you're wreckin' my house.
Copy !req
1022. Sign here, Potter's.
Copy !req
1023. There we go.
Copy !req
1024. And looky here, what's
conveniently placed.
Copy !req
1025. Yeah.
Copy !req
1026. Here what we gonna do.
Copy !req
1027. We gonna let the Sheriff,
Copy !req
1028. not gonna resist when
he puts cuffs on you,
Copy !req
1029. and you gonna tell us
where your boy Finn is.
Copy !req
1030. Do I make myself clear?
Copy !req
1031. Do I make myself clear?
Copy !req
1032. - Yes.
- Yes, what?
Copy !req
1033. - Yes, sir.
- Try again!
Copy !req
1034. - Yes, I—
- The correct answer is,
Copy !req
1035. yes, Super Deputy.
Copy !req
1036. Now, say it, say it, yes, Super Deputy.
Copy !req
1037. Say the goddamn phrase.
Copy !req
1038. All right, Deputy Gary,
you've done a great job.
Copy !req
1039. I think he knows.
Copy !req
1040. I'll let it go for this time.
Copy !req
1041. All right.
Copy !req
1042. Where is he?
Copy !req
1043. Oh!
Copy !req
1044. Look at that.
Copy !req
1045. Lucky me.
Copy !req
1046. He's at Old Man Knickerbocker's pool.
Copy !req
1047. Curtis.
Copy !req
1048. There he is!
Copy !req
1049. Gary, no!
Copy !req
1050. Sheriff, I had him.
Copy !req
1051. That's his son.
Copy !req
1052. Oh, we don't know that
Copy !req
1053. - for sure.
- Don't we?
Copy !req
1054. Didn't that weird Jamaican lady say that?
Copy !req
1055. What more evidence do you need?
Copy !req
1056. What's our next move, Sheriff?
Copy !req
1057. We wait, Office Maggie.
Copy !req
1058. We wait.
Copy !req
1059. Actually, no.
Copy !req
1060. - We gotta keep moving.
- We keep movin'.
Copy !req
1061. Stay one step ahead of him.
Copy !req
1062. How do we do that?
Copy !req
1063. You were right, Office Maggie.
Copy !req
1064. That's what makes you so good.
Copy !req
1065. No problem.
Copy !req
1066. This weird Jamaican
lady knows something.
Copy !req
1067. We need to get back
Copy !req
1068. - to the vet.
- To the vet.
Copy !req
1069. We're going to the vet.
Copy !req
1070. Here we come!
Copy !req
1071. I'm not gonna hurt you, I promise!
Copy !req
1072. - I just need your help, please!
- No closer!
Copy !req
1073. Okay, I'm sorry.
Copy !req
1074. You called me something
the other day, Secaucus?
Copy !req
1075. Segonku, the one who squirts.
Copy !req
1076. You have been marked.
Copy !req
1077. The skunk, oh!
Copy !req
1078. But what happened to me?
Copy !req
1079. Well, legends say that when
one is in a heightened state
Copy !req
1080. at the time of marking,
Copy !req
1081. one becomes Segonku when same
heightened state returns.
Copy !req
1082. Heightened state?
Copy !req
1083. But what, what heightened state?
Copy !req
1084. You remember feeling that you had
Copy !req
1085. at the time of marking, yes?
Copy !req
1086. And you returned to Segonku
Copy !req
1087. when the same feeling happens, yes?
Copy !req
1088. Jiminy, oh what can I do to stop it?
Copy !req
1089. When one bears the mark,
one always bears the mark.
Copy !req
1090. You must avoid that feeling
Copy !req
1091. that brings him out.
Copy !req
1092. Look what you made me do.
Copy !req
1093. Look at this, my shirt is soiled.
Copy !req
1094. Wait, what are you doing?
Copy !req
1095. Well, I can't wear this shirt like this.
Copy !req
1096. It's covered in coffee.
Copy !req
1097. You can't just, you can't
just take your shirt off.
Copy !req
1098. You Americans, always so uptight.
Copy !req
1099. In my country, woman walk around
Copy !req
1100. without a shirt just like a man.
Copy !req
1101. Look, look, you really
don't wanna do that.
Copy !req
1102. You really don't want to, you
don't know what happens when.
Copy !req
1103. I'm without a shirt in a public place,
Copy !req
1104. and the world has not exploded.
Copy !req
1105. Amazing!
Copy !req
1106. Humuna, humuna, humuna, humuna,
Copy !req
1107. humuna, humuna, humuna, humuna, ahh!
Copy !req
1108. You need a tissue?
Copy !req
1109. No, I'm good, I don't need a tissue.
Copy !req
1110. I don't need a tissue, I'm good.
Copy !req
1111. Maybe I need a tissue.
Copy !req
1112. Curtis Albright, just what
do you think you're doing?
Copy !req
1113. Sorry, Mary Beth, I need
to tell you something.
Copy !req
1114. It's the middle of the day, dumb dumb.
Copy !req
1115. You coulda just gone to the door.
Copy !req
1116. You're in real trouble, you know?
Copy !req
1117. Your father and the whole police force
Copy !req
1118. were here looking for you.
Copy !req
1119. Then he knows.
Copy !req
1120. Knows, knows what?
Copy !req
1121. Curtis, you've been acting very peculiar,
Copy !req
1122. very peculiar indeed.
Copy !req
1123. Look, I don't, I don't
know if I can tell you.
Copy !req
1124. Well, sure you can, silly.
Copy !req
1125. You can tell me any—
- No, don't touch me!
Copy !req
1126. Heavens to Betsy, Curtis,
what's the matter with you?
Copy !req
1127. Look, I'll tell you.
Copy !req
1128. But you're gonna wanna sit down for this.
Copy !req
1129. Do you remember last summer
Copy !req
1130. we went to that movie at the drive-in?
Copy !req
1131. I Was a Teenage Werewolf?
Copy !req
1132. Remember, I had nightmares for months.
Copy !req
1133. That's happening to me.
Copy !req
1134. Cross my heart, hope to die,
stick a noodle in my eye.
Copy !req
1135. - You're a werewolf?
- Not a werewolf.
Copy !req
1136. I'm a wereskunk.
Copy !req
1137. Oh, Curtis, you're the absolute most!
Copy !req
1138. Where is it?
Copy !req
1139. Where's the hidden camera?
Copy !req
1140. Oh, where is it?
Copy !req
1141. You got me on Candid Camera!
Copy !req
1142. Oh my god, Curtis Albright,
you are positively boss.
Copy !req
1143. Look, I hate to break it to you,
Copy !req
1144. but there's no hidden camera.
Copy !req
1145. I'm tellin' you the god's honest truth.
Copy !req
1146. You're a wereskunk, that's
the god's honest truth?
Copy !req
1147. What happens, the moon goes full,
Copy !req
1148. and you turn into a skunk?
Copy !req
1149. Please.
Copy !req
1150. Well, not exactly.
Copy !req
1151. It happens when I'm, when
I'm feeling a certain way.
Copy !req
1152. And what way is that?
Copy !req
1153. Okay, it happens when I'm feeling randy.
Copy !req
1154. Who's Randy?
Copy !req
1155. And why are you going around feeling him?
Copy !req
1156. No, no, no, no, when I'm,
Copy !req
1157. when I'm turned on.
Copy !req
1158. Like a radio?
Copy !req
1159. Oh, you're talking like that
creepo Finn Potter again.
Copy !req
1160. Mary Beth, it happens when I'm aroused,
Copy !req
1161. when I'm sexually aroused!
Copy !req
1162. Curtis!
Copy !req
1163. You devil!
Copy !req
1164. A+ for creativity.
Copy !req
1165. I'll give you that much.
Copy !req
1166. I don't follow.
Copy !req
1167. Curtis, if wanted to fool around,
Copy !req
1168. all you had to do was ask.
Copy !req
1169. Mary Beth, I wasn't asking you,
Copy !req
1170. wait,
Copy !req
1171. really?
Copy !req
1172. Well, sure.
Copy !req
1173. I mean, we're not gonna
make it or anything.
Copy !req
1174. It's not like we're steadies.
Copy !req
1175. But we could do other stuff.
Copy !req
1176. Like what?
Copy !req
1177. Well, I could blow you.
Copy !req
1178. - What's that?
- Well, it's when.
Copy !req
1179. Jiminy, people do that?
Copy !req
1180. Sure, Paula Goldie does it
to Ian Stuart all the time.
Copy !req
1181. My stars, and you'd do that to me?
Copy !req
1182. Well, sure, do you wanna give it a try?
Copy !req
1183. Okay.
Copy !req
1184. All right.
Copy !req
1185. Boy, this is sure gonna be neato.
Copy !req
1186. Oh, oh no, no, no!
Copy !req
1187. Oh, see, I told you!
Copy !req
1188. I told you, I told you this would happen!
Copy !req
1189. I can never be your steady, never!
Copy !req
1190. Don't think sexy thoughts,
don't think sexy thoughts,
Copy !req
1191. don't think sexy thoughts.
Copy !req
1192. Don't think sexy thoughts!
Copy !req
1193. Oh.
Copy !req
1194. Don't think sexy thoughts,
don't think sexy thoughts,
Copy !req
1195. don't think sexy thoughts.
Copy !req
1196. Don't think sexy thoughts,
don't think sexy thoughts.
Copy !req
1197. Don't think sexy thoughts,
don't think sexy thoughts,
Copy !req
1198. don't think sexy thoughts.
Copy !req
1199. Tell me again, why we don't
have police cars, Sheriff.
Copy !req
1200. It wasn't in our budget, Gary.
Copy !req
1201. Okay, here's what we're gonna do.
Copy !req
1202. We're gonna split up.
Copy !req
1203. No, Gary, we're gonna split up.
Copy !req
1204. That's what I just said, Sheriff.
Copy !req
1205. - Stop it, Gary.
- What, as you said split,
Copy !req
1206. we're gonna split, I—
- That's enough.
Copy !req
1207. Ooh.
Copy !req
1208. I'm gonna go to my home,
see if he went there.
Copy !req
1209. You two are gonna check out—
Copy !req
1210. The Appliance Mart!
Copy !req
1211. The Appliance Mart, Gary?
Copy !req
1212. - The Pruitt residence.
- Oh.
Copy !req
1213. He may have gone back
there for Mary Beth.
Copy !req
1214. Okay, is it a plan?
Copy !req
1215. Let's move out.
Copy !req
1216. I did too say we should split up.
Copy !req
1217. I know, I heard you.
Copy !req
1218. So, why didn't you say somethin'?
Copy !req
1219. Because I don't like you.
Copy !req
1220. You know, that's an
awfully harsh thing to say.
Copy !req
1221. You hit me right in my heart chord.
Copy !req
1222. Aw, take it back, Officer
Maggie, take it back!
Copy !req
1223. Maggie!
Copy !req
1224. Maggie!
Copy !req
1225. Is everything all right?
Copy !req
1226. Have you seen Curtis?
Copy !req
1227. Well, yeah, he's about 5'8",
Copy !req
1228. he's got dark brown—
- Recently?
Copy !req
1229. Well, not since this morning.
Copy !req
1230. So, he hasn't been back here at all?
Copy !req
1231. Oh, is everything all right?
Copy !req
1232. Does this have something to
do with those missing kids?
Copy !req
1233. I'll explain later.
Copy !req
1234. Right now, I have to get
to the Pruitt residence!
Copy !req
1235. Well, must you?
Copy !req
1236. I'm sorry, my dear, I must.
Copy !req
1237. I know about a crime.
Copy !req
1238. Is that so?
Copy !req
1239. Yes, a man came in here
while I was setting the table.
Copy !req
1240. Took me upstairs, tore my clothes off,
Copy !req
1241. and had his way with me.
Copy !req
1242. By god, who is this man?
Copy !req
1243. It was you.
Copy !req
1244. It was, no, I been, ooh, ooh.
Copy !req
1245. Don't think sexy thoughts,
don't think sexy thoughts
Copy !req
1246. don't think sexy thoughts,
don't think sexy thoughts,
Copy !req
1247. don't think sexy thoughts,
don't think sexy thoughts.
Copy !req
1248. Open up, little girl,
we know you in there.
Copy !req
1249. If I was sheriff, this
thing would already be dead.
Copy !req
1250. Open up, little girl.
Copy !req
1251. If I was sheriff, I'd—
- Appliance Mart?
Copy !req
1252. Back there, you suggested we
go look at the Appliance Mart.
Copy !req
1253. So?
Copy !req
1254. - Why?
- What you mean why?
Copy !req
1255. Why would a skunk go
to an Appliance Mart?
Copy !req
1256. Isn't it obvious?
Copy !req
1257. To purchase a big screen smell-o-vision.
Copy !req
1258. Ooh, I
just love your big, red nose.
Copy !req
1259. And my big, red nose
loves your big, bushy beard.
Copy !req
1260. Ooh, well, I've got
another big, bushy beard
Copy !req
1261. that you're big, red nose
is gonna like even better.
Copy !req
1262. Ooh, the double-bearded woman!
Copy !req
1263. Where is it?
Copy !req
1264. Where is it?
Copy !req
1265. Thoughts, don't think sexy thoughts,
Copy !req
1266. don't think sexy thoughts, don't.
Copy !req
1267. Open up, little
girl, I'm warning you.
Copy !req
1268. One, two, three,
Copy !req
1269. four, five, six, seven—
Copy !req
1270. What are you gonna count to?
Copy !req
1271. Usually people give a number,
Copy !req
1272. I'll give ya to the count of three.
Copy !req
1273. - What are you doin'?
- Texting the sheriff.
Copy !req
1274. What in blazes is that thing?
Copy !req
1275. Oh, I don't know.
Copy !req
1276. It was in my pocket, I've never seen it—
Copy !req
1277. Help, Deputy Gary, help, let me go!
Copy !req
1278. Uh oh, oh, I feel the
circus is coming to town.
Copy !req
1279. Time to tame the lion.
Copy !req
1280. Tame the
lion, all right, tame it.
Copy !req
1281. Don't, don't, don't,
don't think sexy thoughts.
Copy !req
1282. Oh, you are so naughty!
Copy !req
1283. Don't think sexy thoughts,
don't think sexy thoughts.
Copy !req
1284. Don't
Copy !req
1285. think
Copy !req
1286. sexy
Copy !req
1287. thoughts
Copy !req
1288. What was that?
Copy !req
1289. I think it came from the shed.
Copy !req
1290. Ooh.
Copy !req
1291. - Curtis!
- Ooh.
Copy !req
1292. It's our boy!
Copy !req
1293. Come on.
Copy !req
1294. You're gotta get off me.
Copy !req
1295. - This is no time.
- Well, I'm stuck.
Copy !req
1296. I don't know what you want me to do.
Copy !req
1297. I can't get rid of it
Copy !req
1298. - that quick.
- Honey,
Copy !req
1299. you're erect inside of me.
Copy !req
1300. What would you like
Copy !req
1301. - me to do?
- You have to remove
Copy !req
1302. yourself from it.
Copy !req
1303. - I can't just get rid of it.
- Well, I there's no sense
Copy !req
1304. removal going on, are
we in the circus or not?
Copy !req
1305. But.
Copy !req
1306. You gonna
make me slap you silly?
Copy !req
1307. Let's just finish real quick.
Copy !req
1308. - Okay.
- Okay.
Copy !req
1309. I'm done.
Copy !req
1310. Curtis, Curtis, Curtis, Curtis!
Copy !req
1311. Curtis, it's me, it's your pop.
Copy !req
1312. Well, don't you recognize me?
Copy !req
1313. Curtis, it's okay, it's okay, Curtis.
Copy !req
1314. We'll make you a human again.
Copy !req
1315. Curtis, Curtis, no.
Copy !req
1316. Think about it, your mother's Italian.
Copy !req
1317. They're very hairy people.
Copy !req
1318. I'm sure you get it from her.
Copy !req
1319. Curtis, Curtis, please!
Copy !req
1320. Tree, tree, that's better!
Copy !req
1321. Curtis, please stop!
Copy !req
1322. It's your pop, please, somebody help me!
Copy !req
1323. Please, please Curtis!
Copy !req
1324. Woah, no, no, Curtis, please!
Copy !req
1325. Please, it's okay, son!
Copy !req
1326. Curtis, Curtis, oh no.
Copy !req
1327. Ah, no, Curtis, don't.
Copy !req
1328. I'm ticklish.
Copy !req
1329. You feelin' lucky, skunk?
Copy !req
1330. This what we gonna do.
Copy !req
1331. Sheriff, why are you
wearin' a clown costume?
Copy !req
1332. The wife and I like to
Copy !req
1333. dress as carnie folk when we make love.
Copy !req
1334. Oh, fun, well, if you
ever lookin' for a third,
Copy !req
1335. I got a lion tamer suit at home.
Copy !req
1336. Lion tamer, we'll think
about it, thanks, Gary.
Copy !req
1337. Bitchin'.
Copy !req
1338. Anyways, stink boy, this what we gonna do.
Copy !req
1339. Oh, oh, what the hell?
Copy !req
1340. Oh dear, oh what the hell?
Copy !req
1341. Macaronis, macaronis!
Copy !req
1342. Oh, my lord!
Copy !req
1343. Gary!
Copy !req
1344. Gary, no!
Copy !req
1345. That's my son!
Copy !req
1346. And his steady girl.
Copy !req
1347. It is pretty sweet, isn't it?
Copy !req
1348. It sure is, Gary.
Copy !req
1349. It sure is.
Copy !req
1350. Gary, I—
- Shhh, don't think.
Copy !req
1351. Did you know that Officer
Maggie was a robot?
Copy !req
1352. After all I've seen today, Gary,
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1353. I'll believe just about anything.
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1354. Heaven.
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1355. Please, please no, Curtis please.
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1356. Not my rubber nose.
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1357. I can see the string.
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1358. Okay, okay suspense in disbelief.
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