1. You're looking at
the many noble rabbitsCopy !req
2. who have served as the Easter Bunny.Copy !req
3. If you've ever gotten a basket of candyCopy !req
4. and colored eggs on Easter morning,Copy !req
5. you have them to thank.Copy !req
6. Yes, even that guy.Copy !req
7. See, every bunny dreams of holding
the title, but not just anyone can do it.Copy !req
8. You have to be majestic.
You have to be dignified.Copy !req
9. You have to be, well, a bunny.Copy !req
10. Or, at least you did.Copy !req
11. Hi. I'm Fred O'Hare,
the first human Easter Bunny.Copy !req
12. Sounds insane, you say?Copy !req
13. It'll make sense once you know
how it all went down.Copy !req
14. HOPCopy !req
15. E.B.'S DAD: E.B.?Copy !req
16. E.B.?Copy !req
17. Where are you?Copy !req
18. Hi, Dad!Copy !req
19. Woohoo!Copy !req
20. Oh! There you are.Copy !req
21. Son! I was thinking.Copy !req
22. You are getting so big,
you're practically a foot tall.Copy !req
23. Over a foot, if you count the ears.Copy !req
24. I always count the ears.Copy !req
25. So, how would you like to
go to work with me today?Copy !req
26. Would I? That sounds awesome.Copy !req
27. I said the same thing when my father
first took me to the factory.Copy !req
28. I didn't use the word "awesome," but...
Down, please.Copy !req
29. - Thank you.
- Go ahead, Son. Take a look.Copy !req
30. Whoa!Copy !req
31. Look at all that candy.Copy !req
32. Come on, come on.Copy !req
33. See you.Copy !req
34. This is so cool!Copy !req
35. Oh, careful!
E.B., welcome to the Easter Factory.Copy !req
36. This is where we make
all the candy and eggsCopy !req
37. that I deliver to
the children of the world.Copy !req
38. It's pretty impressive, isn't it?Copy !req
39. It's amazing, Dad!Copy !req
40. I'm glad you like it,
because someday this will all be yours.Copy !req
41. Really?Copy !req
42. Now, come on, Son.
There's so much to see.Copy !req
43. E.B.: Daddy, what do you
call that thingamajig?Copy !req
44. Ah, the Marshmallow Chick Machine.Copy !req
45. Loved them since I was your age.Copy !req
46. When your grand-dad,
the Easter Bunny before me,Copy !req
47. took me on this very same tour...Copy !req
48. - Hello.
- Hello, little bunny.Copy !req
49. What are you doing?Copy !req
50. We don't eat the candy.
We make the candy!Copy !req
51. - But I thought...
- E.B.Copy !req
52. This is my second-in-command, Carlos.Copy !req
53. It's fine, Carlos. E.B. was, uh,
taste-testing. Isn't that right, Son?Copy !req
54. Yup, I'm taste-testing. It's great.Copy !req
55. Oh, dear me. No, no.Copy !req
56. Son, we're going to have
to work on your taste.Copy !req
57. Carlos, too much marsh,
not enough mallow.Copy !req
58. Exactly, señor,
I was just going to say that.Copy !req
59. Phil! Too much marsh, not enough mallow!Copy !req
60. Phil! Phil!Copy !req
61. Phil!Copy !req
62. Hi, boss.Copy !req
63. No dancing on the job! It's forbidden.Copy !req
64. - Yes, sir. I'm very bad.Copy !req
65. I am so sorry, señor.
I will deal with this personally.Copy !req
66. Yes. Easter is right around the corner,
Carlos.Copy !req
67. - There is no room for error.
- Sí, señor.Copy !req
68. Remember this, E.B.,
we can't make any mistakes.Copy !req
69. The entire world is counting on us.Copy !req
70. This seems hard, Dad.
And I don't know if I can do it.Copy !req
71. Oh, come now. Don't you worry, Son.Copy !req
72. Yes, it's a big responsibility,
but you'll be ready.Copy !req
73. You'll have to be.Copy !req
74. Why, in a few years
you will pick up the Egg of DestinyCopy !req
75. and receive the magical powers
of the Easter Bunny.Copy !req
76. Now, let's move on.Copy !req
77. E.B.: Bye, Carlos.Copy !req
78. Okay, ciao. See you later.Copy !req
79. Enjoy your life of privilege,
little bunny.Copy !req
80. So, how are my kids doing?Copy !req
81. I had rehearsals for
the Easter play today.Copy !req
82. Oh.Copy !req
83. They usually cast
a boy as Peter Cottontail,Copy !req
84. but they made an exception for meCopy !req
85. on account of my
singing voice is so strong.Copy !req
86. That's great, honey.Copy !req
87. Sam, how about you?Copy !req
88. Well, I'm up for
a big promotion at work.Copy !req
89. Really? That's terrific.Copy !req
90. Good to hear that two of my kids
are working so hard.Copy !req
91. So, Fred. How did that job interview go?Copy !req
92. I don't know about that place, Dad.Copy !req
93. I just don't know
if it's really what I'm looking for.Copy !req
94. Really? Did they pay money?Copy !req
95. Then it's exactly
what you've been looking for.Copy !req
96. Well, that's just crass.Copy !req
97. What are you nodding for?Copy !req
98. "Dear Fred,
as your mother I have always loved you,Copy !req
99. "and it hurts me to have to tell youCopy !req
100. "in this way, but there comes a timeCopy !req
101. "when every young man must grow up
and leave the nest."Copy !req
102. You all prepared statements?Copy !req
103. Fred, we're just doing this
because we love you, Son.Copy !req
104. The Sadeki family down the street wentCopy !req
105. through the same thing
with their son Jordy.Copy !req
106. He just laid on the couch all day
watching court shows,Copy !req
107. but then they had an intervention,Copy !req
108. and now he works in a pharmacy,
and has an apartment.Copy !req
109. I don't really want
to work at a pharmacy, Mom.Copy !req
110. Well, you need to do something.
You need to get a life.Copy !req
111. You need to get a job
and you need to move out.Copy !req
112. Especially that last one.Copy !req
113. But I did move out. And I had a job.Copy !req
114. Is it my fault the company downsized?Copy !req
115. Fred, that was over a year ago!Copy !req
116. You have to get back on the horse.Copy !req
117. And you have so much potential.Copy !req
118. Thanks, Mom.Copy !req
119. Sometimes I think you adopted meCopy !req
120. because Fred was such a disappointment.Copy !req
121. Wow.Copy !req
122. Alex, that is a very hurtful statement.Copy !req
123. You're not denying it.Copy !req
124. Eat your dinner.Copy !req
125. Mom, Dad, I'm trying, okay?
I go on job interviews. I had one today!Copy !req
126. Yes, but it wasn't what you were
looking for. It's always something.Copy !req
127. You didn't like the commute.Copy !req
128. The parking lot was too far away
from the building.Copy !req
129. The man in the cubicle
next to you smelled.Copy !req
130. - He smelled.
- Fred,Copy !req
131. nothing is ever good enough for you.Copy !req
132. You don't want me to settle, do you?Copy !req
133. Settling is fine.Copy !req
134. Dad, when I was a kid,Copy !req
135. you said that when I grew up I was
going to do something great.Copy !req
136. Yes. But now I'm telling you
that you should forget about "great,"Copy !req
137. and settle for getting any job.Copy !req
138. We should have nudged you
out of the nest a long time ago.Copy !req
139. Baby birds get a nudge.Copy !req
140. Giant birds who never leave,
they get shoved.Copy !req
141. E.B.!Copy !req
142. E.B.!Copy !req
143. Hello, Dad. So, what do you think?Copy !req
144. Uh, what did I...
It was great! Really kicking.Copy !req
145. But, E.B., shouldn't you be
rehearsing your speech?Copy !req
146. You're about to be
crowned the Easter BunnyCopy !req
147. in front of 3,000 of your peers.Copy !req
148. Uh, yeah, about that.Copy !req
149. Yes?Copy !req
150. Look, Dad,Copy !req
151. ever since I was yea big, it's been,Copy !req
152. "The Easter Bunny wouldn't do that" andCopy !req
153. "The Easter Bunny has to be perfect."Copy !req
154. But I'm not perfect.Copy !req
155. I know that, Son.
But you'll get there, eventually.Copy !req
156. But I'm...Copy !req
157. Listen. You want me to be this.Copy !req
158. But maybe I'm not this.Copy !req
159. Just maybe, maybe I'm this.Copy !req
160. A sock?Copy !req
161. Ugh.Copy !req
162. Yeah, that's right.
I might be a metaphorical sock.Copy !req
163. I might not be a good enough egg,Copy !req
164. but I might be the best sock ever.Copy !req
165. I might not cut it
delivering Easter baskets,Copy !req
166. but I might be great at something else.Copy !req
167. Oh, the drums! Why, I think that's fine.Copy !req
168. I think it's really nice that you have
a hobby. Everyone should have a hobby.Copy !req
169. It's not a hobby, Dad.Copy !req
170. I want to drum in a band.
I want to see the world.Copy !req
171. E.B., the Easter Bunny sees the world.Copy !req
172. Every country in one night,
making people of the world happy.Copy !req
173. Really, Dad? The whole world?Copy !req
174. What about China?Copy !req
175. No!Copy !req
176. Look, it's candy, woman!Copy !req
177. Madam, please.Copy !req
178. All right. So,
we haven't cracked China yet.Copy !req
179. But, for all those that do believe,
you will be there.Copy !req
180. No, Dad. I don't want
to be the Easter Bunny.Copy !req
181. Now, listen to me.Copy !req
182. Four thousand years of
tradition doesn't endCopy !req
183. just because one selfish bunny
doesn't feel like doing it.Copy !req
184. Look. Dad...Copy !req
185. No, E.B., you look!Copy !req
186. You are going to be the Easter Bunny!Copy !req
187. Now you need to get it together,
get rid of these drums,Copy !req
188. and get your priorities straight!Copy !req
189. I'll see you out there!Copy !req
190. No, I don't think you will.Copy !req
191. Destination. Where dreams come true.Copy !req
192. In-flight snack preference.Copy !req
193. Any baggage? Just emotional.Copy !req
194. I'm sorry, Dad.Copy !req
195. Ow!Copy !req
196. I did it.Copy !req
197. E.B.: Hollywood.Copy !req
198. Right. First order of business,
find a place to stay.Copy !req
199. Perfect.Copy !req
200. Fred, wait, wait, wait! Fred.Copy !req
201. Did you know about this, Sam?Copy !req
202. Oh, uh...Copy !req
203. You did. Okay, look.Copy !req
204. The rules of this intervention stateCopy !req
205. that I am not
supposed to help you, okay?Copy !req
206. So you can't tell anyone
what I'm about to do.Copy !req
207. No! I'm not going to
take money from you.Copy !req
208. Wasn't going to give you money.Copy !req
209. - We can call it a loan.
- Fred, look,Copy !req
210. I got you a job interview tomorrow
at my friend's company.Copy !req
211. I'm a little slammed tomorrow.Copy !req
212. I know you're not.Copy !req
213. - I'm pretty busy.
- No.Copy !req
214. Look, it's an entry-level position.Copy !req
215. - Entry-level?
- At a video game company!Copy !req
216. - Okay. That's kind of cool.
- I know.Copy !req
217. All right, look, if it means
that much to you, I'll swing by.Copy !req
218. No, Fred. You don't "swing by." Okay?Copy !req
219. You shower, you shave, and you show up.
The three "shs."Copy !req
220. Come on, Fred. You've
got to start your life.Copy !req
221. - Think of this as a reboot.
- Right!Copy !req
222. It's time.Copy !req
223. Yeah. You know what? You're right.Copy !req
224. In a couple of months, couple of weeks,Copy !req
225. you're gonna see a whole new Fred.Copy !req
226. Yeah. By Easter. Easter is in two weeks.Copy !req
227. By Easter, I'm going to have a new job,
a new place, a new life.Copy !req
228. - Great!
- Okay.Copy !req
229. Now if you'll excuse me,Copy !req
230. I'm going to go sleep in my car.Copy !req
231. Fred, listen.Copy !req
232. My boss is on vacation for a few weeks
and he asked me to house-sit.Copy !req
233. Nobody ever asks me to house-sit.Copy !req
234. I know. It's so weird.Copy !req
235. Anyway, he has dogs,Copy !req
236. and you know I'm scared of dogs,
so take over for me.Copy !req
237. Wait. Your boss lives in
a big mansion, right?Copy !req
238. Yes, in Beverly Hills.Copy !req
239. And he loves his house
more than he loves his kids.Copy !req
240. So you have to behave. Okay?Copy !req
241. Do not touch anything.
Do not break anything.Copy !req
242. Do not go upstairs!Copy !req
243. Wait, what's upstairs?Copy !req
244. - Fred.
- Okay.Copy !req
245. And do not forget to feed the dogs.Copy !req
246. Got it!Copy !req
247. - Thank you, Sam.
- You're welcome.Copy !req
248. I put the address on the paper.Copy !req
249. Okay.Copy !req
250. - But, Fred?
- Yeah?Copy !req
251. If you screw up, I'll kill you.Copy !req
252. Okay.Copy !req
253. Listen to me. This is
the Playboy Mansion. It's not a hotel.Copy !req
254. Yeah, right.Copy !req
255. But it says here that ever since 1971,Copy !req
256. the Playboy Mansion has been homeCopy !req
257. to sexy bunnies from around the world.Copy !req
258. Friend, I can't see you.
Please step forward.Copy !req
259. Now, I'm telling you that I am both
a bunny, and incredibly sexy.Copy !req
260. I don't have time for this.Copy !req
261. Hello? Hello?Copy !req
262. Maybe this is the rags part
of my rags-to-riches story.Copy !req
263. All right, let's see here.
54 Broadway Terrace.Copy !req
264. Whoa! Look at this!Copy !req
265. Hello, Fred's new crib.Copy !req
266. Maybe this is a good thing.Copy !req
267. All great artists suffer
before they become famous.Copy !req
268. That lady wrote Harry Potter in a ditch.Copy !req
269. But it's the hunger, the lonelinessCopy !req
270. and exhaustion that gets you really.Copy !req
271. How could this night get any worse?Copy !req
272. I see. Car accident. Thank you!Copy !req
273. Ow!Copy !req
274. Why?Copy !req
275. Oh, ow!Copy !req
276. It's still alive.Copy !req
277. I've got to help him out.Copy !req
278. This will do.Copy !req
279. Don't you worry, little friend.Copy !req
280. I'm going to end your suffering.Copy !req
281. No!Copy !req
282. Who said that?Copy !req
283. E.B.: Well, who do you think said it?Copy !req
284. Your latest victim.Copy !req
285. You know what? We can leave
the insurance companies out of this.Copy !req
286. I could just, maybe, come live with you
for a couple of months.Copy !req
287. No, no, no!
Not real. Not real. Not real.Copy !req
288. - Excuse me?Copy !req
289. You left your car back there,
with the lights on.Copy !req
290. I'm just saying!Copy !req
291. Say something. Talk again.Copy !req
292. I'm E.B. And you are?Copy !req
293. I'm Fred.Copy !req
294. Well, Fred, I am so hungry.Copy !req
295. Have you got anything
in the old snack department?Copy !req
296. Okay.Copy !req
297. Here you go.Copy !req
298. Oh! Oh! That's...Copy !req
299. What is this?Copy !req
300. What? It's Turkey Jerky.Copy !req
301. First, you hit me with your car,
and then you try and poison meCopy !req
302. with a meat stick.Copy !req
303. Why do you hate me?Copy !req
304. Okay. Is there something you'd
rather eat, you weird little thing?Copy !req
305. Well...Copy !req
306. Carrots!Copy !req
307. He's a genius.Copy !req
308. One carrot. Okay.Copy !req
309. Time to hop away out of Fred's life
back to the Enchanted Forest.Copy !req
310. You're kicking me out?Copy !req
311. Yeah. It's a bad time.Copy !req
312. Yeah. Did some jerk
just hit you with his car?Copy !req
313. That kind of bad time?Copy !req
314. No, I'll tell you what. It's fine.Copy !req
315. Oh, me leg. Ow.Copy !req
316. I mean, you can't be expected to helpCopy !req
317. every innocent creature you wound.Copy !req
318. And I'm sorry if I dented your bumper
with my face and body.Copy !req
319. Do you want me
to look for some baby aspirin?Copy !req
320. No, no! You save it.
You might run over a baby.Copy !req
321. Just pray that sweet messenger
of death visits quickly.Copy !req
322. Is that the icy hand now?Copy !req
323. Okay, wait!Copy !req
324. On the off-chance that you're really
here and I'm not completely crazy,Copy !req
325. and I did run you
over and you're hurt...Copy !req
326. I guess you can stay.Copy !req
327. Thanks, mate. And I could bunk down
anywhere. Seriously.Copy !req
328. West wing, master suite,
guest bedroom. I'm not picky.Copy !req
329. Right. Okay. What's this space, then?Copy !req
330. This is a place for you
to stay for the night.Copy !req
331. I'm not a car.
So why would I need to stay here?Copy !req
332. Look, it's not my house.Copy !req
333. I'm not even allowed to go upstairs,
and I'm human.Copy !req
334. Sorry. What are the newspapers for?Copy !req
335. Because I'm not really
a voracious reader or anything.Copy !req
336. You know, you're an animal.
So, we all know animals...Copy !req
337. I understand. I'll just sleep down here,Copy !req
338. among my poo and pee like a pig.Copy !req
339. If you like, you use it as well.Copy !req
340. Sorry.Copy !req
341. No, don't reproach yourself
for these medieval conditions.Copy !req
342. Yeah, whatever.Copy !req
343. I'm going to go to bed
where, hopefully, I've been all along.Copy !req
344. So, good night.Copy !req
345. Oh, okay, I'll just stay here then.Copy !req
346. By myself.Copy !req
347. In the dark.Copy !req
348. With the door closed.Copy !req
349. Señor. Señor, I have news.Copy !req
350. Operations are running at full capacity.Copy !req
351. With my supervision,
we are right on target for Easter.Copy !req
352. Fine, fine.
But is there any report on my son?Copy !req
353. Yes, I have the report.Copy !req
354. The sun will be shining,
foggy times are lifting.Copy !req
355. Easter will be clear sailing, señor.Copy !req
356. Not the sun. My son, E.B.!Copy !req
357. That son. Yes. I almost forget.Copy !req
358. The rabbit hole was usedCopy !req
359. for an unscheduled trip
earlier this evening, sir!Copy !req
360. What? You mean he ran away?Copy !req
361. And at the height of our busiest time.Copy !req
362. It's almost unforgivable.Copy !req
363. But how could he just take off
like this? It's just not like him.Copy !req
364. Please, señor. Don't be too rash.Copy !req
365. It's way too early to disown him.Copy !req
366. But I wasn't going to...
Wait a minute. Are you hopping?Copy !req
367. Am I? I didn't notice.Copy !req
368. It just comes so naturally.Copy !req
369. Anyway, señor, considering
your obvious distraction with this,Copy !req
370. wouldn't it be wise
to pass the mantle to,Copy !req
371. I don't know, somebody else?Copy !req
372. Hmm.Copy !req
373. Let's see.
It would have to be someone you trust.Copy !req
374. Someone who is
comfortable giving orders.Copy !req
375. Phil! Keep doing that, but do it faster!Copy !req
376. Faster. Gotcha.Copy !req
377. And stop dancing!
- No dancing. Yes, sir.Copy !req
378. Carlos, you're right.Copy !req
379. I'm totally right.Copy !req
380. Assemble the Pink Berets at once!Copy !req
381. I'm sorry. What?Copy !req
382. We need to find E.B.Copy !req
383. The Pink Berets?Copy !req
384. But they're only to be used
in a situation of extreme emergency.Copy !req
385. This is pretty extreme, Carlos.
The Pink Berets will find E.B.Copy !req
386. They have to!Copy !req
387. You can't ignore me forever,
Señor Bunny.Copy !req
388. Freeze!Copy !req
389. Who's there?
Is this the same guy?Copy !req
390. Don't make me come down there.Copy !req
391. MAN ON RADIO: 101 is blocked due
to an overturned tractor trailerCopy !req
392. at the Burbank entrance.Copy !req
393. Weather is a cool 72 degrees...Copy !req
394. Rabbit.Copy !req
395. Hello?Copy !req
396. Talking rabbit?Copy !req
397. Okay. Wow.Copy !req
398. Dude, you are stressed.Copy !req
399. Hi, Fred O'Hare.Copy !req
400. Hey, Fred O'Hare. Nice to meet you.Copy !req
401. I'm Fred O'Hare.
You need me for this job.Copy !req
402. You're going to hire me for this job.Copy !req
403. Oh! The dogs. Right.Copy !req
404. "Sam, until Daisy and Baby
are accustomed to you,Copy !req
405. "please wear the safety suit
in the hall closet when you feed them."Copy !req
406. Safety suit?Copy !req
407. Daisy! Baby! Come here.Copy !req
408. Let's go. I'm on a schedule here.Copy !req
409. Oh!Copy !req
410. No!Copy !req
411. No! Heel! Sit! Sit!Copy !req
412. That's fine.Copy !req
413. Okay, it's all good.Copy !req
414. No, no, no!Copy !req
415. Look, Fred! Can you believe it?Copy !req
416. They've got a drum kit in here.Copy !req
417. What do you think?
Never had one formal lesson!Copy !req
418. I am the Extreme Rock Master!Copy !req
419. I know what you're thinking.Copy !req
420. - No, you really don't.Copy !req
421. Hey, Fred, what's wrong?
You look a bit put out.Copy !req
422. Why are you still here?Copy !req
423. You can't be up here. You're in
the forbidden part of the house.Copy !req
424. Yeah, but so are you.Copy !req
425. Pick this up, man.
You've destroyed the place!Copy !req
426. I wouldn't say, "destroyed."
I was just getting comfortable.Copy !req
427. What about your injury?
Huh? Your leg? You're hurt, right?Copy !req
428. Yeah, exactly. I needed a soft bed
in which to convalesce.Copy !req
429. Oh, I see. So,
you climbed a flight of stairs...Copy !req
430. Struggled up each stair is more like it.
Worth it, though.Copy !req
431. That Jacuzzi loosened me right up.Copy !req
432. Jacuzzi?Copy !req
433. E.B.: Oh, yeah. You might
want to turn it off.Copy !req
434. It was creating a lot of bubbles.Copy !req
435. No!Copy !req
436. My sister is going to kill me!Copy !req
437. Don't worry. We'll clean it up together,Copy !req
438. as soon as I've beat my high score.Copy !req
439. Hey, Fred! Come on, your turn.
Pick up a guitar, mate.Copy !req
440. E.B.: Fred, I think we
got off on the wrong foot.Copy !req
441. You said some things,
I flooded some things.Copy !req
442. Let's start over again.Copy !req
443. Fred? Why am I in a box?Copy !req
444. This seems like the sort of thing
a serial killer might do.Copy !req
445. Is this going to be a surprise?Copy !req
446. All right, come on. Out.Copy !req
447. Oh! Are we going for a hike?Copy !req
448. Better! We're
releasing you into the wild.Copy !req
449. The wild?Copy !req
450. Oh, no, no, no. I'll just
stay with you, I think.Copy !req
451. This place seems to be
dominated by carnivores.Copy !req
452. - Get out. Let's go.
- What are you doing?Copy !req
453. You're going to leave me here?Copy !req
454. Yeah, there's lots of rabbits out here.
You'll feel right at home.Copy !req
455. E.B.: Fred, are we locked in
a destructive relationship?Copy !req
456. Get out.
- Fred. You're making a scene!Copy !req
457. Get out!Copy !req
458. Move along.Copy !req
459. Look, Fred.Copy !req
460. - Goodbye!
- But I want to stay with you!Copy !req
461. - Fred, please don't go.
- I'm already late. So go away.Copy !req
462. Come on, man.Copy !req
463. Fred, mate. I'll behave.Copy !req
464. I'll clean up my mess.
I'll do the dishes.Copy !req
465. Not your problem.
There are no dishes in the wild.Copy !req
466. No. Fred. But I'm special.Copy !req
467. Well, we're all special.Copy !req
468. You're not getting it.Copy !req
469. I don't mean special as in,
"everybody's special."Copy !req
470. I mean, I'm really special.Copy !req
471. What're you doing?Copy !req
472. See?Copy !req
473. Jelly beans?Copy !req
474. E.B.: Mmm-hmm.Copy !req
475. So what? So you talk and you poop candy.Copy !req
476. Could you do it in someone else's life?Copy !req
477. No, you're right. It's not your concern.Copy !req
478. And in two weeks, maybe you can explain
to the children of the worldCopy !req
479. why they didn't get
their Easter baskets.Copy !req
480. Easter?Copy !req
481. What, Easter?Copy !req
482. No way.Copy !req
483. Yes, Fred. I am the Easter Bunny.Copy !req
484. Hop in.Copy !req
485. Yes! I knew it! I knew it.
I knew you were real. I knew it!Copy !req
486. What are you talking about?
Of course I'm real.Copy !req
487. No.Copy !req
488. When I was a kid,
I saw you on Easter morning.Copy !req
489. - You did?
- Yeah.Copy !req
490. That was you, right?Copy !req
491. Absolutely. No question.Copy !req
492. Okay. Because you do
look a little different. Was it...Copy !req
493. I don't know, have you lost weight?
Or maybe it's the clothes.Copy !req
494. You're talking about the old guy.Copy !req
495. Yeah. We got rid of him.Copy !req
496. - He didn't understand children.
- Ah.Copy !req
497. He didn't get that
children sometimes just want to drum.Copy !req
498. I mean, dream.
Sometimes they just want to dream.Copy !req
499. Children dream.Copy !req
500. Yeah. So he had to go, anyway, this guy.Copy !req
501. Right.Copy !req
502. Well, it's a good thing
you got rid of him, then.Copy !req
503. Exactly.Copy !req
504. So... Wait a minute.
Why are you here now?Copy !req
505. Just doing a little last minute recon
for Easter deliveries.Copy !req
506. Finding ideal egg hiding locations.
There is one. That's perfect!Copy !req
507. Compiling a list of kids
with chocolate allergies.Copy !req
508. That kind of thing.
It's all very technical.Copy !req
509. I see.Copy !req
510. Okay.Copy !req
511. Oh, man. I'm really late.Copy !req
512. Late for what? What are we doing?Copy !req
513. I have a job interview.
You're staying here.Copy !req
514. But here is boring. Let me come
with you. I could be a job reference.Copy !req
515. Thank you, I appreciate that.
Look, I really need this job,Copy !req
516. and I don't think anyone
there is going to be able to handle you.Copy !req
517. I'm not sure I can handle you.
So, just do me a favor? Wait in the car.Copy !req
518. Fred, I don't want to get your hopes up,Copy !req
519. but I think you're definitely going
to get this job.Copy !req
520. - Be good.
- Yes, sir.Copy !req
521. I'll stay here and guard the vehicle.Copy !req
522. 2UP Games.Copy !req
523. Yes, sir.
I'll put you through to Mr. Hill.Copy !req
524. Hi, I'm Fred O'Hare.
I'm here for a 10:30 withCopy !req
525. Mrs. Beck.Copy !req
526. You're a half-hour late.Copy !req
527. I know. I called.Copy !req
528. That doesn't make you any earlier.Copy !req
529. Uh-huh.Copy !req
530. You know, you're the first impression
people get when they walk in here.Copy !req
531. In many ways,
you are the face of the company.Copy !req
532. Fill this out.Copy !req
533. - Yes, ma'am.Copy !req
534. 2UP Games. Yes, sir. Can I help you?Copy !req
535. What is that alarming noise?Copy !req
536. Oh, no!Copy !req
537. Pink Berets!Copy !req
538. 2UP Games. Please hold.Copy !req
539. I'm sorry, sir.
Who did you want to speak to?Copy !req
540. Fred.Copy !req
541. What are you doing here?
I told you to wait in the car!Copy !req
542. This is serious.
I really need your help!Copy !req
543. I need your help!
You can't be here. You've got to go!Copy !req
544. - Fred?
- Yes.Copy !req
545. Get me out of here!Copy !req
546. Ah!Copy !req
547. Mrs. Beck.Copy !req
548. - Yes.
- How are you?Copy !req
549. I'm well. I can't say that I'm that
impressed with your punctuality, though.Copy !req
550. Yeah, I have half a dozen excuses.Copy !req
551. But I'm just going to go
with a straight apology.Copy !req
552. I'm really, really sorry.Copy !req
553. - Okay. Clean slate, then.
- Thank you.Copy !req
554. So, let's begin, Fred.
I'll show you inside.Copy !req
555. Whoa!Copy !req
556. So, recent employment history.Copy !req
557. You haven't worked in a year?Copy !req
558. Yeah, my parents have moved in with me.Copy !req
559. - That has sort of been a full-time job.
- Mmm-hmm.Copy !req
560. It's fine. It just gets in the way
of writing my novel, is all.Copy !req
561. You're writing a novel?
What is that about?Copy !req
562. It's about a crippled soldier who,
in the future, goes to another planetCopy !req
563. and he becomes
one of the indigenous peopleCopy !req
564. who are blue and live in the forest.Copy !req
565. That's not Avatar?Copy !req
566. Not really.Copy !req
567. So, why don't we take a walkCopy !req
568. and I can tell you a little bit
about the company?Copy !req
569. Okay.Copy !req
570. So, the good news is,
we tend to promote from within.Copy !req
571. But you'd be starting in the mailroom.Copy !req
572. - Mailroom.
- Is that a problem?Copy !req
573. No, no, I love mail. I get lots of mail.Copy !req
574. E-mail, snail mail, chain mail.Copy !req
575. I am male.Copy !req
576. Speaking of mail, that's Cody.
Let me introduce you to him.Copy !req
577. He is being promoted to junior exec
and you would be replacing him.Copy !req
578. Wow. Congratulations.Copy !req
579. Question.Copy !req
580. I need 30 copies of something,
collated, stapled, boundCopy !req
581. and on my desk by yesterday.Copy !req
582. What do you do?Copy !req
583. I would make 30 copies,
and I would do what you said with them.Copy !req
584. I smell potential.Copy !req
585. Oh, Mrs. Beck, I was wanting to talk
to you about my lunch.Copy !req
586. Fred. Fred!Copy !req
587. What is wrong with you?Copy !req
588. This is an extreme emergency.Copy !req
589. You're ruining this for me.
You really need to go.Copy !req
590. You're right. I'll create a diversionCopy !req
591. and we'll escape in the ensuing chaos.Copy !req
592. E.B., no! Get back here!Copy !req
593. - Fred?
- Yeah.Copy !req
594. I got a good feeling about this place.
Where to next?Copy !req
595. Sounding good to me. But where is Ricky?Copy !req
596. We need to put a back beat behind that.Copy !req
597. A back beat.Copy !req
598. I think Ricky went out for coffee.Copy !req
599. - I guess he's back.
- How you feeling, Ricky?Copy !req
600. Yeah, I'm smashing.Copy !req
601. I mean, I'm fine.
I'm just fine, daddy-o.Copy !req
602. Well, then let's do it.Copy !req
603. Okay, so this our sport...Copy !req
604. Oh.Copy !req
605. This is our sports-game
motion-capture studio.Copy !req
606. Mmm-hmm.Copy !req
607. - In here?
- Yeah.Copy !req
608. Ah! Hockey.Copy !req
609. It's golf.Copy !req
610. And this is our sound recording studio
for our music games.Copy !req
611. We've done Extreme Rock Master,
Extreme Jazz Master,Copy !req
612. and now we're doing
Extreme Blues Master.Copy !req
613. Sounds like a cool idea.Copy !req
614. Whoa, you got the Blind Boys of...Copy !req
615. Quit it!
I'm going to kill you so bad! Get out!Copy !req
616. Okay, Fred, let's try and keep moving...Copy !req
617. - I'm all of a sudden not feeling
so good. -Oh.Copy !req
618. - Do you have a restroom?
- Yeah.Copy !req
619. Where is that?Copy !req
620. That was brilliant!Copy !req
621. I mean, that was tight.Copy !req
622. Sounded all right.
But I know my drummer when I hear him.Copy !req
623. So, who are you, boy?Copy !req
624. Okay, I admit it. I'm not a blues man.
My name is E.B.Copy !req
625. I'm just some guy off the streetCopy !req
626. with two sticks of wood and a dream.Copy !req
627. I understand if you throw me out.Copy !req
628. I get it if you don't
want to give me a break.Copy !req
629. Hey, slow down, friend.Copy !req
630. You know, we have a buddy who is always
on the lookout for new talent.Copy !req
631. And the man is a genius.
He is the godfather of entertainment.Copy !req
632. And he's having auditions tomorrow.Copy !req
633. The Hoff? You mean he can help me?Copy !req
634. If he like you.Copy !req
635. Wow. Thanks, Blind Boys.Copy !req
636. Good luck, little rabbit.Copy !req
637. Wait, how did you know I was...Copy !req
638. Mmm!Copy !req
639. Clever gents.Copy !req
640. E.B.: So, Fred, how'd it go?Copy !req
641. Don't say a word.Copy !req
642. Can I get a little
clarification, here?Copy !req
643. Is this what the Easter Bunny does now?Copy !req
644. He just goes house to house,
messing up people's lives?Copy !req
645. Well, that is just hurtful.Copy !req
646. Besides, you're selling yourself short.Copy !req
647. They were going to
shove you in the mail room.Copy !req
648. Well, excuse me, but I happen to think
you're better than that.Copy !req
649. You don't know me, okay? We just met.Copy !req
650. I can tell. You give off this aura
of untapped potential.Copy !req
651. I do?Copy !req
652. Don't pull that with me, rabbit, okay?
I'm too smart for you.Copy !req
653. But, Fred, I'm serious.Copy !req
654. You're destined to do something great.
I just know it.Copy !req
655. I've heard that one before.Copy !req
656. You'll find an awesome job.Copy !req
657. Hey. Look, what about this?Copy !req
658. - Dog walker?
- No.Copy !req
659. - TSA Officer?
- No.Copy !req
660. What about this one? It looks exciting.Copy !req
661. Wind in your hair, hot babe on your arm.Copy !req
662. That's a car ad.Copy !req
663. You should buy that car, then.Copy !req
664. Ah! Señor. How you doing, jefe?Copy !req
665. Am I disturbing?Copy !req
666. It's never been this quiet in here.Copy !req
667. Yeah, it's so depressing.Copy !req
668. You should clear this out.
Make a new den or a clubhouse.Copy !req
669. Like a man-cave! It'll be fun.Copy !req
670. I called his dreams ridiculous.Copy !req
671. What kind of father does that?Copy !req
672. No, no, señor.Copy !req
673. I will not permit you
to beat yourself up over this.Copy !req
674. Anybody would be lucky
to have a father such as you.Copy !req
675. Thank you, Carlos. I miss him.Copy !req
676. Me, too, señor.Copy !req
677. A son is very difficult to replace.Copy !req
678. Difficult, but not impossible.Copy !req
679. Carlos...Copy !req
680. What the... What's that on your head?Copy !req
681. What? My new earmuffs?Copy !req
682. It's a cold spring
this year, you know? Brr!Copy !req
683. Oh.Copy !req
684. Anyway, what am I going to do?Copy !req
685. I know, how can you deliver EasterCopy !req
686. with this tremendous burden
on your old, frail shoulders?Copy !req
687. Hey, hey, hey, easy with the "old."Copy !req
688. No, I'm just saying,
like, compared to me.Copy !req
689. Surely you're not thinking
of making the trip yourself?Copy !req
690. What choice do we have?Copy !req
691. We can improvise. I mean...Copy !req
692. - Does it even have to be a bunny?
- What?Copy !req
693. I suppose, given these troubled times,Copy !req
694. even a humble chick could do the job.Copy !req
695. Really, Carlos.Copy !req
696. Wow. I mean, that is funny.Copy !req
697. Can you imagine that?
A chick delivering Easter?Copy !req
698. That's ridiculous.Copy !req
699. Oh, dear me.Copy !req
700. But I appreciate
you trying to cheer me up, though.Copy !req
701. Please. It is my pleasure
to amuse you, señor.Copy !req
702. A chick delivering...Copy !req
703. Fred, I was wondering if...Copy !req
704. Are you doing anything tomorrow?Copy !req
705. Tomorrow I get to start my new job
at the video game company.Copy !req
706. Wait a second. No, that didn't work out.Copy !req
707. I know. I know. I'm sorry about that.Copy !req
708. But do you know what?
Every cloud has a silver lining.Copy !req
709. And behold this silver lining, Fred!Copy !req
710. The Hoff?Copy !req
711. Yes, please. I just need a ride.Copy !req
712. Mmm.Copy !req
713. - No.
- Come on, Fred.Copy !req
714. This is my one big chance.
I'll do anything.Copy !req
715. Even get out of your life.Copy !req
716. I take you to Hoff Knows Talent,
and that's it, we're done.Copy !req
717. Bunny's honor.Copy !req
718. Right here, mate.Copy !req
719. It's okay. A verbal agreement is fine.Copy !req
720. Now, you realize, you can't talk.Copy !req
721. No. I can.Copy !req
722. No, what I mean is, you shouldn't talk.Copy !req
723. What? Like, ever?Copy !req
724. Yeah, "ever" would be wonderful.Copy !req
725. But from now on,
especially not in front of other people.Copy !req
726. They might freak out
and want to dissect your brain.Copy !req
727. Dissect? That's a bit extreme.Copy !req
728. There's an easy explanation
as to why I can talk.Copy !req
729. It's a simple combination
of cuteness and magic.Copy !req
730. Okay. Here we go. One BLT.Copy !req
731. And one order of carrot cake a la mode,
topped with, quote,Copy !req
732. Whatever candy you have laying around
back there. Unquote.Copy !req
733. Uh, excuse me.Copy !req
734. Is that a cough drop?Copy !req
735. Yeah. It's cherry. It counts.Copy !req
736. It's a peculiar garnish.Copy !req
737. Can I get some chocolate syrup?Copy !req
738. Sure, doll.Copy !req
739. E.B.: Thanks, love.Copy !req
740. It seems my brain is still intact, Fred.Copy !req
741. E.B.: Fred, I've just had an idea.Copy !req
742. When I'm a famous rock star, I'm
going to buy a mansion just like thisCopy !req
743. and make you sleep in the garage
in a topsy-turvy switcheroo.Copy !req
744. - What do you think?
- Oh, man. My sister is here.Copy !req
745. You never told me you had a sister.Copy !req
746. There's still so much we don't know
about each other, Fred.Copy !req
747. If she goes upstairs, I'm dead.Copy !req
748. - Why?
- Why?Copy !req
749. Let me take you back to this morningCopy !req
750. when you flooded the bathroom and
you trashed the bedroom.Copy !req
751. You remember that?Copy !req
752. Fred, leave this to me.
I'll smooth it out with her. Ow!Copy !req
753. - Hey!
- Look at me.Copy !req
754. One word out of you,
and it's rabbit season. You got it?Copy !req
755. Okay, I'm going to run interference.Copy !req
756. I need you to sneak upstairs
and clean up, quietly!Copy !req
757. - Sam!
- Hi!Copy !req
758. Hey, it's not a good time
for me right now. I was just leaving.Copy !req
759. But you just got here.Copy !req
760. I know, right?Copy !req
761. - Hey, what are these?
- Oh!Copy !req
762. There you are. Mmm!Copy !req
763. I'm on this North Beach diet.
It's carrots only.Copy !req
764. That is why they're all over the house.Copy !req
765. I was going to clean them up, though.Copy !req
766. - Okay, Fred, how did the interview go?
- Yes?Copy !req
767. Oh! Thank you for asking.
Amazing! I aced it.Copy !req
768. - Really?
- Yeah.Copy !req
769. No way!Copy !req
770. Why are you so surprised?Copy !req
771. - Fred, that's awesome!
- Place could use me, too.Copy !req
772. Don't get me wrong, it was great.
It was good.Copy !req
773. It was all right.Copy !req
774. I just... I don't know if it was for me,
really. It just didn't gel.Copy !req
775. Something felt a little off
about the whole thing.Copy !req
776. I didn't get it.Copy !req
777. Oh! What? What happened?Copy !req
778. It's kind of hard to pinpoint
any one specific thing.Copy !req
779. Oh, Fred.Copy !req
780. I know. I know. I'm sorry.Copy !req
781. What is that?Copy !req
782. I wouldn't know
because I'm not allowed to go up there.Copy !req
783. And I haven't been up there once.Copy !req
784. Hmm. Okay.Copy !req
785. Sam, no, you're not allowed up there,
either. Don't go up there!Copy !req
786. Sam, I'm begging you!Copy !req
787. I can explain.Copy !req
788. - Oh, my God! Look at this.Copy !req
789. Look how cute this stuffed bunny is!Copy !req
790. Wow! Yeah. Oh.Copy !req
791. - So cute!
- Isn't he?Copy !req
792. Yeah, you know what?
Maybe we shouldn't be playing with himCopy !req
793. because we're not really supposed
to be up here in the first place. So...Copy !req
794. He's just so lifelike.Copy !req
795. You think?Copy !req
796. It's a little freaky-looking to me.Copy !req
797. - Oh! Oh, he's so soft!Copy !req
798. And cute, and cuddly,Copy !req
799. and warm.Copy !req
800. Okay!Copy !req
801. Why don't we put him back
before things get uncomfortable?Copy !req
802. No, I'm not uncomfortable.Copy !req
803. Well, I'm uncomfortable
because I'm looking after the houseCopy !req
804. and it's my responsibility.Copy !req
805. There we are.Copy !req
806. - All right.Copy !req
807. Oh, my God!Copy !req
808. Wow! Look at that. He's a wind-up toy.Copy !req
809. That is so adorable!Copy !req
810. Yeah, I think he might be broken.Copy !req
811. Yeah, you're a broken
little guy, aren't you?Copy !req
812. Hey... Ow!Copy !req
813. Fred, I am really worried about you.Copy !req
814. Hmm!Copy !req
815. Don't eat that.Copy !req
816. You might not like the flavor.Copy !req
817. Fred, relax.Copy !req
818. Watermelon.Copy !req
819. Can we go?Copy !req
820. Look, Sam, I don't want you to worry,
okay? I'll get something.Copy !req
821. Look, Fred, I just thought it would make
tomorrow night a lot easierCopy !req
822. if you could tell Mom and Dad
that you had a job.Copy !req
823. Whoa! What's tomorrow night?Copy !req
824. Alex's play! The one she's been
talking about for weeks.Copy !req
825. Oh, that is easy. I'm not going.Copy !req
826. Oh, yeah, you are.
Fred, come on, she's your sister.Copy !req
827. All right.Copy !req
828. - Wear something nice.
- I'll wear something nice.Copy !req
829. - 7:00.
- 7:00.Copy !req
830. - Don't forget, I love you.
- I love you.Copy !req
831. - Put gas in your car. 7:00.
- Bye.Copy !req
832. Nice. Is she seeing anyone?Copy !req
833. No, she's single,
and she's looking for a rabbit.Copy !req
834. Wow! There's a lot of people here, Fred.Copy !req
835. Way more than I imagined.Copy !req
836. You nervous?Copy !req
837. Well, a little.Copy !req
838. It's just...Copy !req
839. I'm starting to feel a bit sick, Fred.Copy !req
840. I've never actually played
in front of anybody.Copy !req
841. Come on. This could be
your big opportunity.Copy !req
842. I know it's my big chance,
but what if I blow it?Copy !req
843. Relax. I'll give you a good intro.Copy !req
844. I'll set you up, you knock them down.Copy !req
845. - Yeah?
- Yeah.Copy !req
846. - Really?
- Mmm-hmm.Copy !req
847. - Thank you, Fred.
- No problem.Copy !req
848. Now, if you could please
remove your claws from my shoulder.Copy !req
849. Sorry about that. That's my nerves.Copy !req
850. Thanks.Copy !req
851. Thank you.Copy !req
852. Next.Copy !req
853. Next.Copy !req
854. Next.Copy !req
855. Next.Copy !req
856. Mr. Hasselhoff.Copy !req
857. Yes.Copy !req
858. May I call you The Hoff?Copy !req
859. - Yes.
- Fantastic.Copy !req
860. Sir, I realize that
you have seen it all.Copy !req
861. But this...Copy !req
862. This will stretch the limits
of even your vast experience.Copy !req
863. What you're about to
see will mystify you.Copy !req
864. It will challenge the very scope...Copy !req
865. Cut to the chase, my friend.Copy !req
866. Okay. Uh...Copy !req
867. I give you E.B.Copy !req
868. Come on, let's drum.Copy !req
869. Stop! Stop! Stop, stop.Copy !req
870. I don't want to hear anymore.Copy !req
871. Come on! Mr. Hoff, we've been
waiting all day. Give the guy a chance.Copy !req
872. I gave him a chance.Copy !req
873. I didn't like it.Copy !req
874. I loved it!Copy !req
875. Woohoo! Yes!Copy !req
876. Hoff knows talent,
and that rabbit's got talent!Copy !req
877. Thank you, David Hasselhoff!Copy !req
878. I will not let you down.Copy !req
879. This is a golden opportunity
and one I intend to realize fully!Copy !req
880. Hey, wait.Copy !req
881. You're not surprised
that I'm a talking rabbit.Copy !req
882. Little man, my best
friend's a talking car.Copy !req
883. Can you make it to a live taping
of the show Saturday night?Copy !req
884. I'll send a limo.Copy !req
885. Did you hear him? Did you hear The Hoff?Copy !req
886. I'm on my way, Fred!Copy !req
887. It sounds like The Hoff really dug you.Copy !req
888. I mean, he is a good actor,
but I think he was sincere.Copy !req
889. Thanks, mate.
And don't think I've forgotten our deal.Copy !req
890. You've done your part.Copy !req
891. And now I'm ready to
get out of your life.Copy !req
892. Good. Yeah, good.Copy !req
893. We've had some good times, eh?
Haven't we, Fred?Copy !req
894. Yeah, there were a few.Copy !req
895. You validated my whole childhood dream.Copy !req
896. - And then, what else?Copy !req
897. Let me think. Good times.Copy !req
898. Well, maybe just one good time.
But the main thing isCopy !req
899. I got to meet the guy
on my second grade lunchbox.Copy !req
900. Hasselhoff, wow!Copy !req
901. E.B.?Copy !req
902. E.B.?Copy !req
903. E.B.?Copy !req
904. Psst! Fred!Copy !req
905. What are you doing?Copy !req
906. - Pink Berets.
- Pink what?Copy !req
907. Pink Berets.Copy !req
908. - There is nobody here.
- Oh yes, there is.Copy !req
909. If they see me,
they'll take me back to Easter IslandCopy !req
910. and I'll never get my chance to drum!Copy !req
911. Pink Berets? Huh? Sounds super fierce.Copy !req
912. Don't be fooled by their adorable name.Copy !req
913. They're the Easter Bunny's Royal Guard!Copy !req
914. But you're the Easter Bunny! Aren't you?Copy !req
915. Of course I am, technically.Copy !req
916. What do you mean, "technically"?Copy !req
917. I'll explain later. Just get in the car.Copy !req
918. Look, I was supposed
to take over this year, but I ran away.Copy !req
919. What are you, crazy?Copy !req
920. Who wouldn't want to
be the Easter Bunny?Copy !req
921. That's, like, the greatest job ever!Copy !req
922. Yeah, you'd think so.
But it's what my dad wants, not me.Copy !req
923. He expects so much. What's left for me
to do but let him down?Copy !req
924. Sounds familiar.Copy !req
925. Sometimes fathers just don't get it.Copy !req
926. He told me I only ever think of myself.Copy !req
927. Other times,
they hit the nail right on the head.Copy !req
928. Come on, Fred.Copy !req
929. I know we said
we'd go our own separate ways,Copy !req
930. but please, you've got to protect me.Copy !req
931. Look, I'm sorry,Copy !req
932. but I can't really leave you places,Copy !req
933. I can't really take you places.Copy !req
934. And I've got to go to
my sister's play tonight.Copy !req
935. Oh, I like plays.Copy !req
936. We should go see a play
that my sister's not inCopy !req
937. and that my family will
not be attending.Copy !req
938. I understand.Copy !req
939. Just drop me off at the bus station.
I'm sure I'll be fine.Copy !req
940. I could be one of those street drummers,Copy !req
941. with a bucket!Copy !req
942. - Hi. How you doing?
- Good.Copy !req
943. - Who's your kid playing?
- An egg.Copy !req
944. - An egg?
- Yeah.Copy !req
945. Wow, that's something.Copy !req
946. My kid is the Easter Bunny.Copy !req
947. The one that makes it all happen.Copy !req
948. All right, Dad,
all the roles are equally important.Copy !req
949. Sure, sure.Copy !req
950. Fred!Copy !req
951. Please get to
your seats. The play is about to begin.Copy !req
952. Hey, guys. Mom, Dad.Copy !req
953. Here comes Peter CottontailCopy !req
954. Hopping down the bunny trailCopy !req
955. Hippity hoppity, Easter's on its wayCopy !req
956. Bringing every girl and boy
Baskets full of Easter joyCopy !req
957. Ugh! What is that dreadful sound?Copy !req
958. Oh, no! They found me!Copy !req
959. Run for it! It's the Pink Berets!Copy !req
960. Oh! Never mind, everyone. False alarm.Copy !req
961. Please continue with your awful singing.Copy !req
962. How did that rabbit just talk?Copy !req
963. Um...Copy !req
964. Fred has been studying ventriloquism.Copy !req
965. Yeah! I might do it professionally.Copy !req
966. Woohoo!Copy !req
967. You're being ridiculous.
Stop it! Sit down!Copy !req
968. You should be nicer to your son.Copy !req
969. It's just a thought.Copy !req
970. Who wants to hear a song?
We'd love to sing a song for you.Copy !req
971. - No, we wouldn't.Copy !req
972. Stop making a fool
of yourself! Sit down!Copy !req
973. Absolutely.Copy !req
974. I want candyCopy !req
975. I want candyCopy !req
976. Take it, kids.Copy !req
977. I know a girl who's tough but sweetCopy !req
978. She's so fine she can't be beatCopy !req
979. She's got everything I desireCopy !req
980. He's really good!Copy !req
981. I can see his lips move.Copy !req
982. Sets the summer sun on fireCopy !req
983. I want candyCopy !req
984. I want candy!Copy !req
985. E. B.: Just the proud moms now.Copy !req
986. I want candyCopy !req
987. Now the grumpy dads.Copy !req
988. I want candyCopy !req
989. All I want is your candyCopy !req
990. All I want is your...Copy !req
991. ChewyCopy !req
992. Fun to eatCopy !req
993. So darn sweetCopy !req
994. CandyCopy !req
995. We're a hit! They love us!Copy !req
996. Here.Copy !req
997. - Are those for me?
- Mmm-hmm.Copy !req
998. Thank you. So sweet.Copy !req
999. Alex. Good job tonight!Copy !req
1000. Wasn't she a good Easter Bunny?Copy !req
1001. - Jerk!Copy !req
1002. Oh! Hey, Dad. I was just leaving.Copy !req
1003. Fred, seems like we made quite
an impression on you the other night.Copy !req
1004. Is this your new career?Copy !req
1005. Upstaging grade-schoolers
with your ventriloquist puppet?Copy !req
1006. No, no, I got lots of
other stuff going on.Copy !req
1007. Yeah.Copy !req
1008. - There it is.
- What?Copy !req
1009. That look. The complete
and utterly disappointed look.Copy !req
1010. Well, I'm sorry, Fred,Copy !req
1011. but can you give me just,
I don't know,Copy !req
1012. one reason not to be disappointed?Copy !req
1013. Well...Copy !req
1014. - Just one.
- Yeah.Copy !req
1015. Fred?Copy !req
1016. Fred, where'd you go?Copy !req
1017. Yeah, I'm right here.Copy !req
1018. I just remembered I have a really
great solid lead, actually.Copy !req
1019. - You do?
- Yeah, a great job.Copy !req
1020. - Tell me about it.
- I can't really tell you about it.Copy !req
1021. But it's big. You're going to love it.Copy !req
1022. It's really big!Copy !req
1023. E.B.: Hey, what's with
the "Mr. Serious" all of a sudden?Copy !req
1024. Wait, is this where you tell me
you want to see other rabbits?Copy !req
1025. Because I'm open-minded, Fred.Copy !req
1026. E.B., I have the most amazing idea.Copy !req
1027. When I was a kid, I told everyoneCopy !req
1028. that I saw the Easter Bunny, right?Copy !req
1029. No one believed me,Copy !req
1030. even thoughCopy !req
1031. he left me this.Copy !req
1032. This chocolate bunny, which I kept.Copy !req
1033. Oh, dear.Copy !req
1034. And tonight, it just hit me.Copy !req
1035. I realized that it was
my destiny to see him.Copy !req
1036. Just like it was my destiny to meet you.Copy !req
1037. It's all been leading up to this.Copy !req
1038. Up to what?Copy !req
1039. You don't want to be
the Easter Bunny, right?Copy !req
1040. I know who can take your place.Copy !req
1041. Who?Copy !req
1042. Me!Copy !req
1043. I'm sorry, Fred. Would you mind
repeating that in my good ear?Copy !req
1044. I want to be the Easter Bunny.Copy !req
1045. What was that for?Copy !req
1046. That is for people who have gone loony!Copy !req
1047. A human Easter Bunny?Copy !req
1048. Come on, Fred! It doesn't make sense.Copy !req
1049. A bunny makes no sense.
You deliver eggs.Copy !req
1050. If you wanna get all logical,
bring logic into this,Copy !req
1051. you should be an Easter Chicken.Copy !req
1052. What? Come on.Copy !req
1053. People might resist it at first.
But, hey, change can be a good thing.Copy !req
1054. You don't want the job anyway.
The pressure is ungodly!Copy !req
1055. It did a number on me.Copy !req
1056. Do you know there was
a period of roughly nine monthsCopy !req
1057. where the sight of a colored egg
made me want to vomit?Copy !req
1058. And rabbits are
physically unable to vomit.Copy !req
1059. So it was just hours of...Copy !req
1060. Nothing coming out.Copy !req
1061. - I don't care.
- Imagine that, Fred.Copy !req
1062. Don't care.Copy !req
1063. If you can be a drummer,
I can be the Easter Bunny.Copy !req
1064. Fred, you can't just
be the Easter Bunny.Copy !req
1065. - My dad has to give you special powers.
- Eh.Copy !req
1066. - Besides, the Easter Bunny has got
to be fit. -Ow!Copy !req
1067. And you're a little scrawny.Copy !req
1068. Finally, the Easter Bunny
has got to haveCopy !req
1069. lightning-fast reflexes. Hi-ya!Copy !req
1070. Knock it off.
I'm serious. I can do this.Copy !req
1071. I will be the Bunny.Copy !req
1072. The stubborn old bunny
refuses to crown anyone else.Copy !req
1073. This can only mean
one thing, my friends.Copy !req
1074. We are going to have to take matters
into our own hands.Copy !req
1075. - Um, um, um. Carlos? Carlos?Copy !req
1076. Yes, Phil?Copy !req
1077. - We don't have hands, per se.Copy !req
1078. No, it's a figure of speech, Phil.Copy !req
1079. Right. Got it.Copy !req
1080. Too long have we labored
under the yoke of the bunnies' tyranny.Copy !req
1081. Well, no more!Copy !req
1082. It's time for the Easter Chick to rise!Copy !req
1083. - Um, um...
- Yes, Phil?Copy !req
1084. Just thinking out loud.Copy !req
1085. But wouldn't it be easier just to
wait for E.B.? I mean, he can fix this.Copy !req
1086. Phil, if you love E.B. so much,
why don't you marry him?Copy !req
1087. - E.B. is gone, okay?
- Oh.Copy !req
1088. There is a new boss.Copy !req
1089. Really? Who is it? Is it me?Copy !req
1090. - Are you being serious?Copy !req
1091. Yes. Hi.Copy !req
1092. Just rehearsing
for the big Easter sing-a-long.Copy !req
1093. Okay, everybody,
this time sing a lot more better.Copy !req
1094. And one, and two. And three and four.Copy !req
1095. It's me. Me, you idiot. I'm taking over.Copy !req
1096. Oh. I see.Copy !req
1097. But first, I must get in shape.Copy !req
1098. I will be the Bunny.Copy !req
1099. You know, I've been thinking, Fred.Copy !req
1100. Oh!Copy !req
1101. Hey, E.B., what's up?Copy !req
1102. Fred, listen.
You helped me become a drummer.Copy !req
1103. And how do I repay you?Copy !req
1104. I jellybean all over
your dream. Well, no. No.Copy !req
1105. I've changed me mind.
I've seen the light.Copy !req
1106. We're going to do this.Copy !req
1107. And nice job on the eggs.Copy !req
1108. I told you I was serious.Copy !req
1109. Seventy-two.
Conditioning is a must, Fred.Copy !req
1110. Seventy-three.Copy !req
1111. This is fun. Just a couple of dudes
hanging out, getting buff.Copy !req
1112. I could do this all day!Copy !req
1113. Me, too, Fred. I feel great.Copy !req
1114. Phil, how am I doing? Be honest.Copy !req
1115. E.B.: Next up, speed and agility, Fred.Copy !req
1116. I want you to run so fast that you're
just a handsome blur with great hair.Copy !req
1117. Ready? Go!Copy !req
1118. Fred, that was awesome!Copy !req
1119. For a couple of seconds,
you touched greatness.Copy !req
1120. I can feel the burn!Copy !req
1121. But it's good. It's a good burn.Copy !req
1122. Phil, too fast! Too fast, Phil!Copy !req
1123. Sorry, sir.Copy !req
1124. Come on, Fred! Keep hopping!Copy !req
1125. Woohoo! That's the spirit!Copy !req
1126. The student is becoming the master.Copy !req
1127. The Padawan is becoming the Jedi!Copy !req
1128. The human being
is becoming the Easter Bunny.Copy !req
1129. I can feel myself getting stronger.Copy !req
1130. Phil? How do I look from back there?Copy !req
1131. My buttocks, they are pretty firm, yeah?Copy !req
1132. It's a wonderful butt, Carlos.Copy !req
1133. Sí, sí, I know.Copy !req
1134. That's very good,Copy !req
1135. in a crude, primitive,
offensive-to-me-personally kind of way.Copy !req
1136. What do you think?Copy !req
1137. Uh...Copy !req
1138. It's a little too
hot for the kids, no?Copy !req
1139. Very impressive!
But I can bet you can go even faster.Copy !req
1140. Way to go! Stay calm, Fred.
Dogs can smell fear.Copy !req
1141. And you have nothing
to fear but fear itself,Copy !req
1142. and this dog I'm riding on.Copy !req
1143. Wow!Copy !req
1144. Nice work, Fred.Copy !req
1145. Oh, no. Not today.Copy !req
1146. Ah!Copy !req
1147. What about Fred?Copy !req
1148. He'll be all right.Copy !req
1149. Whoa.Copy !req
1150. Hey, I know you guys.Copy !req
1151. You're the Pink Berets, right? Ha!Copy !req
1152. E.B. said you guys were so scary,
but you're really...Copy !req
1153. You're really adorable.Copy !req
1154. Oh.Copy !req
1155. Easter Island.Copy !req
1156. Oh.Copy !req
1157. They brought me here to lead them
in all things Easter, of course!Copy !req
1158. Hello, my fellow Easter-teers.Copy !req
1159. I am truly, truly humbled
by your choice in me.Copy !req
1160. And as I stand before you, I...Copy !req
1161. Oh.Copy !req
1162. Is this part of the coronation ritual?Copy !req
1163. Phuh!Copy !req
1164. Murderer!Copy !req
1165. Picking up a little tension in the room.Copy !req
1166. Carlos! What's going on?Copy !req
1167. Who is this person
and what's he doing here?Copy !req
1168. Wow, you're him.Copy !req
1169. The big guy.
I'm Fred O'Hare. I met you...Copy !req
1170. Well, I didn't meet you.
I saw you when I was a kid.Copy !req
1171. You look great.Copy !req
1172. Señor Bunny, brace yourself.Copy !req
1173. This heartless human,
he has killed your son!Copy !req
1174. What? E.B.?Copy !req
1175. Did you say "kill"?Copy !req
1176. No, I didn't kill E.B..Copy !req
1177. Oh! Liar!Copy !req
1178. This can't be so.
Where are the Pink Berets?Copy !req
1179. No!Copy !req
1180. Wait a minute. That's not...Copy !req
1181. Silence, human!Copy !req
1182. Can't you see you have broken
his poor old heart?Copy !req
1183. Are you kidding me?Copy !req
1184. Old friend, I share your sorrow.Copy !req
1185. E.B. was like your son to me.Copy !req
1186. I'm trying to keep it together.Copy !req
1187. But don't you worry,
I will take care of Easter.Copy !req
1188. Whoa, whoa, whoa! Does anyone care that
that's a Butterball turkey?Copy !req
1189. No, no, that is E.B.Copy !req
1190. He has the same shirt and everything.Copy !req
1191. My deepest condolences.Copy !req
1192. Attention, all bunnies.Copy !req
1193. There will be a service for E.B.
in the egg painting room.Copy !req
1194. Carrots and coffee to follow.Copy !req
1195. Carlos. What are you up to?Copy !req
1196. It's called a coup d'etat.Copy !req
1197. Which is French for coup d'etat!Copy !req
1198. But, Carlos.Copy !req
1199. You've been my most trusted
number two for years.Copy !req
1200. Guess what? I am sick
of doing number two.Copy !req
1201. It is our time for number one!Copy !req
1202. Yeah? We the bosses now.Copy !req
1203. All hail Carlos!Copy !req
1204. We the bosses! We the bosses! Woohoo!Copy !req
1205. E.B.'S DAD: Pink Berets!Copy !req
1206. Seize him!Copy !req
1207. Woohoo!Copy !req
1208. Hey! Don't do that.Copy !req
1209. He's a beloved holiday icon!Copy !req
1210. No!Copy !req
1211. You can do this.
You are the world's best rabbit drummer.Copy !req
1212. You are a superstar.Copy !req
1213. You are a jerk for abandoning Fred.Copy !req
1214. Hey, I don't need
that kind of voice in my head!Copy !req
1215. Yeah, well, you should have thought
of that before you abandoned Fred.Copy !req
1216. Look, you better tell me
something positive about me.Copy !req
1217. - I can't. You abandoned Fred.Copy !req
1218. Oh! Hello, who is this gorgeous devil?Copy !req
1219. Is Eb in here, please?Copy !req
1220. "Eb"?Copy !req
1221. It's "E.B." That's me.Copy !req
1222. Oh, all right, well, E.B.,
you're wanted on stage in two minutes.Copy !req
1223. Welcome to Hoff Knows Talent.Copy !req
1224. You guys look great. There are all kinds
of exciting acts tonight.Copy !req
1225. There he is.Copy !req
1226. How's my little guy?Copy !req
1227. Actually, David Hasselhoff,
I've got a problem.Copy !req
1228. Hmm.Copy !req
1229. Is it the jitters?Copy !req
1230. Believe me, even I used to get them.
Now, I find a good way...Copy !req
1231. No, it's not the jitters, David.Copy !req
1232. I'm starting to realize
I might be a really selfish rabbit.Copy !req
1233. Look, I love drumming.Copy !req
1234. But when my friend needed me most,Copy !req
1235. I left him in a house
full of highly trained ninja bunnies.Copy !req
1236. What am I going to do?Copy !req
1237. Hmm.Copy !req
1238. A dilemma as old as time itself.Copy !req
1239. I know that if I left right now,
I'd be giving up fame.Copy !req
1240. - And untold riches.
- And untold riches.Copy !req
1241. And all the bunnies you could ever want.Copy !req
1242. Yes, and all the...Copy !req
1243. You're not really helping much, David.Copy !req
1244. Like, at all!Copy !req
1245. And Fred could be in real trouble.Copy !req
1246. Go to him.Copy !req
1247. Go to him.Copy !req
1248. Give it up for
Mr. David Hasselhoff!Copy !req
1249. It's The Hoff!Copy !req
1250. Fred?Copy !req
1251. Anybody home?Copy !req
1252. Fred?Copy !req
1253. Uh-oh.Copy !req
1254. The Easter moon is on the rise.Copy !req
1255. At midnight,Copy !req
1256. her radiant beams will fill up the Egg
of Destiny with magic.Copy !req
1257. Then, at last, Señor Bunny,Copy !req
1258. I will be Easter's new king!Copy !req
1259. Carlos, I'm warning you!Copy !req
1260. The Egg of Destiny is too dangerous
in the hands of a chick.Copy !req
1261. Its power can only
be wielded by a bunny.Copy !req
1262. Oh, yes? Well, look at me wielding.
I'm wielding!Copy !req
1263. Ooh-ooh. I'm wielding it again. Okay?Copy !req
1264. Oh, Carlos, can I wield
the Egg of Destiny? Please?Copy !req
1265. No.Copy !req
1266. Can I at least touch it?Copy !req
1267. - Ow!
- There, you touched it.Copy !req
1268. That was harsh.Copy !req
1269. But, Carlos, think of the children.Copy !req
1270. Yes, but I am! The childrens.Copy !req
1271. They don't want candy and chocolate.Copy !req
1272. From now on,Copy !req
1273. their baskets will be filled with clumps
of bird seed, dried crickets,Copy !req
1274. and the world's finest worms!Copy !req
1275. Mmm! Mmm! Mmm!Copy !req
1276. Mmm!Copy !req
1277. Have you completely lost your mind?Copy !req
1278. Silence! You see,
this is why he must go.Copy !req
1279. It's this lousy attitude of his.
Well, no more!Copy !req
1280. The more sensitive chicks in the room
may want to avert their eyes.Copy !req
1281. What about a compromise, okay?Copy !req
1282. The bunny gets Easter one year
and the chick gets it the next.Copy !req
1283. Enough of the chitty-chatty.Copy !req
1284. Bye-bye, Easter Bunny.Copy !req
1285. Hello! Hey, everyone.Copy !req
1286. I'm back. Yep, it was all a big mistake,
but I'm alive.Copy !req
1287. Hey, Larry, Kyle,
what are you doing in there?Copy !req
1288. E.B.'S DAD: E.B.! You're alive!Copy !req
1289. E.B.!Copy !req
1290. Dad? Fred? What's going on?Copy !req
1291. Gummy cannons! In position.
Fire at will!Copy !req
1292. That hurt!Copy !req
1293. Put him on the belt, boys.Copy !req
1294. Dice him, slice him, and pulverize him!Copy !req
1295. That is a bit excessive.Copy !req
1296. - Oh, no! E.B.!
- Son!Copy !req
1297. The reign of the bunny is over!Copy !req
1298. Oh!Copy !req
1299. Somebody help! Help us!Copy !req
1300. What are you doing? Don't worry,
Dad, Fred. I'll be right there.Copy !req
1301. To the Egg Sleigh! And step on it!Copy !req
1302. Are these ropes made of black liquorice?Copy !req
1303. Yes, yes, they are. Horrible stuff!Copy !req
1304. We can eat through them.Copy !req
1305. I suppose you can.Copy !req
1306. You see, my friends?
It is just like I told you, no?Copy !req
1307. Oh, tonight is going to
be a very big night!Copy !req
1308. - I'm flying!Copy !req
1309. Without even flapping my tiny wings.Copy !req
1310. Everything is coming up Carlos!Copy !req
1311. - Got it!
- Good man, Fred.Copy !req
1312. Hop on.Copy !req
1313. All right. Let's go!Copy !req
1314. I'm starting to get a sense
of impending doom now.Copy !req
1315. Ow!Copy !req
1316. No!Copy !req
1317. I made it!Copy !req
1318. - All right. Here we go!
- Come on, Fred!Copy !req
1319. Whoa!Copy !req
1320. - Look, Fred! There he is. It's E.B.!
- E.B.!Copy !req
1321. The Egg Sleigh!
You've got to stop Carlos!Copy !req
1322. Don't worry, Dad! I'm on it!Copy !req
1323. The power is surging through my veins!Copy !req
1324. It's good to be the king.Copy !req
1325. Eh?Copy !req
1326. What is happening to me?Copy !req
1327. Uh-oh.Copy !req
1328. Whoa!Copy !req
1329. Come on out, Carlos. It ends here!Copy !req
1330. You think you can just take over Easter?Copy !req
1331. Well, guess what?Copy !req
1332. I actually think you're on to something.Copy !req
1333. You're a bright man,
you're an innovator.Copy !req
1334. I like it. Give it a whirl.Copy !req
1335. One second. Hey!Copy !req
1336. You finish?Copy !req
1337. Um... Not quite.Copy !req
1338. Take that!Copy !req
1339. E.B.: Get off!Copy !req
1340. Whoa!Copy !req
1341. Incoming!Copy !req
1342. Why?Copy !req
1343. Bunny slam!Copy !req
1344. Ow!Copy !req
1345. You father was a fool to think
you would ever amount to anything.Copy !req
1346. Here comes Carlos YellowtailCopy !req
1347. Hopping down the chicky trailCopy !req
1348. Easter is coming your wayCopy !req
1349. Okay, Phil,
initiate take-off procedures.Copy !req
1350. Aye-aye, Captain!Copy !req
1351. Chicks, fall in!Copy !req
1352. Attention!Copy !req
1353. Here we go.Copy !req
1354. Right flaps!Copy !req
1355. Left flaps!Copy !req
1356. Okay, we're good to go!Copy !req
1357. Let's go, Phil. Easter is waiting.Copy !req
1358. Righty-o.Copy !req
1359. Uh-oh.Copy !req
1360. Oh, boy.Copy !req
1361. Phil, let's get this bird in the air!Copy !req
1362. Yeah!Copy !req
1363. Phil!Copy !req
1364. Knock off the dancing!Copy !req
1365. Yes, sir. Sorry. Lifting off!Copy !req
1366. No way! The show is not over.Copy !req
1367. Phil!Copy !req
1368. What are you doing? Fly us straight!Copy !req
1369. No, no, Phil!Copy !req
1370. Knock it off! Keep her level!Copy !req
1371. No, Phil.Copy !req
1372. Phil! Phil!Copy !req
1373. Phil! Please, Phil!Copy !req
1374. Phil!Copy !req
1375. Phil, I'm feeling a little...Copy !req
1376. Will you please stop dancing?Copy !req
1377. Phil!Copy !req
1378. Woohoo! Yeah, that's right!Copy !req
1379. This is not over!Copy !req
1380. Ah-ha!Copy !req
1381. Thank you very much.Copy !req
1382. Dad!Copy !req
1383. E.B.!Copy !req
1384. I was so worried, Son.Copy !req
1385. I'm so sorry for all the things I said.Copy !req
1386. Me, too, Dad.Copy !req
1387. And your friend, here. He saved my life.Copy !req
1388. He was magnificent!Copy !req
1389. Well, I...Copy !req
1390. I kind of was.Copy !req
1391. Hey, thanks, Fred.Copy !req
1392. Well, Easter's in a few hours.
I have to get going.Copy !req
1393. What?Copy !req
1394. Dad, I'm ready.Copy !req
1395. But, E.B., what about your dream?Copy !req
1396. I'm still going to be a drummer, Dad.Copy !req
1397. But I can be the Easter Bunny, too.Copy !req
1398. There's just one thing.Copy !req
1399. All right, then.Copy !req
1400. Fredrick O'Hare.Copy !req
1401. Yes, sir.Copy !req
1402. Please step forward.Copy !req
1403. Down on one knee.Copy !req
1404. Left or right, doesn't matter.Copy !req
1405. And now, place your forefinger
on the Egg of Destiny.Copy !req
1406. Oh...Copy !req
1407. E.B., you as well.Copy !req
1408. By the power vested in me,Copy !req
1409. I pronounce E.B. and Fred O'HareCopy !req
1410. co-Easter Bunnies.Copy !req
1411. Hear, hear!Copy !req
1412. Wow!Copy !req
1413. Now go forth and deliver!Copy !req
1414. Woohoo!Copy !req
1415. Wonderful brunch, Bonnie.Copy !req
1416. Thank you, dear.Copy !req
1417. It is delicious.Copy !req
1418. Totally agree. This is amazing, Mom.Copy !req
1419. You should open a restaurant.
I'm serious.Copy !req
1420. That is a very nice thing to say, Fred.Copy !req
1421. And can I say that I love your costume?Copy !req
1422. I think it is so cheerful.Copy !req
1423. Thanks, Mom.Copy !req
1424. But it's a uniform.Copy !req
1425. I'm so tired.Copy !req
1426. Yeah, you were up very late
delivering pizzas.Copy !req
1427. Easter baskets.Copy !req
1428. Every time you say "Easter baskets,"
I hear "pizza."Copy !req
1429. It just helps me cope.Copy !req
1430. Guys, can we not do this today?Copy !req
1431. Oh, they're here.Copy !req
1432. This is exciting.Copy !req
1433. That is my co-Easter Bunny.Copy !req
1434. Hey, why don't you guys come see me off?
It'll be fun.Copy !req
1435. Well, that's weird.
Who do you think it is?Copy !req
1436. I don't know.Copy !req
1437. Wow.Copy !req
1438. Fred.Copy !req
1439. Fred, wait.Copy !req
1440. This isCopy !req
1441. amazing!Copy !req
1442. I know, right?Copy !req
1443. It's pretty cool, huh?Copy !req
1444. I'm sorry I gave
you such a hard time.Copy !req
1445. Aw, Dad, come on. You don't have to...Copy !req
1446. I'm proud of you.Copy !req
1447. Thanks, Dad.Copy !req
1448. Easter Bunny.Copy !req
1449. Wow!Copy !req
1450. The one who makes it all happen.Copy !req
1451. Say the words, Fred. Bring it home.Copy !req
1452. Happy Easter to all!
And to all, a good mid-to-late morning.Copy !req
1453. On Cheepers! On Peepers!
On Biscuit and Buzzy!Copy !req
1454. On Chucky! On Clucky!Copy !req
1455. On Feathers and Carlos.Copy !req
1456. E.B.: Yeah, come on, Carlos.
Put your back into it.Copy !req
1457. I've been flapping all night,
so just cut me some slacks, okay?Copy !req
1458. One little coup
and suddenly I'm everybody's chump.Copy !req
1459. Subrip & Sync: easytobeamanCopy !req
1460. Fred, what did she say?
Was that about me?Copy !req
1461. You speak Chinese? Just when I think
I can't love you any more...Copy !req