Hollywood Cop (1987)

1. - Hey, hey Animal!

2. You gotta understand Animal.

3. - I know, he tried to take me to bed yesterday.

4. - He did?

5. - When this job is over I'm gonna pick you up.

6. - Fuck you, she's with me.

7. - I'll fucking ass motherfucker!

8. - Alright, alright, alright.

9. - Oh shit!

10. Get off, get off, get the hell off her, come on!

11. Get out of here.

12. - Alright.

13. - Come on, god damn, get up, hurry up.

14. Come on straighten your neck tie, smile!

15. - Hi boss.

16. - Now what the fuck is going on here?

17. - Really sorry boss, we we're just having a little fun,

18. I hope it didn't get out of hand.

19. - Fun huh?

20. Well did you manage to get out and look at the ranch?

21. - Everything's taken care of.

22. - Good, now I'll tell you what I want you to do.

23. Russian. - Yes?

24. - Get rid of these fucking broads alright?

25. - Okay, come on girls.

26. Move it, move it, come on hurry.

27. Hey you too, come on.

28. - Now you got a complete layout of the ranch?

29. - Every square— - Everything?

30. - Every square inch.

31. - Everything, you know it inside out?

32. - I swear I could do it blindfolded?

33. - You sure? - Positive.

34. - Okay, alright.

35. Now we're gonna kidnap the kid.

36. But I want you to leave the mother alive.

37. I don't want any witnesses.

38. - Hey don't worry boss, I'll kill 'em all.

39. - Now you keep an eye on him.

40. - I will boss. - He's a little strange.

41. Where's the other guys?

42. - Man, they've been sitting in the car for about 30 minutes.

43. - Well get to it.

44. - Alright.

45. - Hi Stevie, what are you doing?

46. - I'm washing the goat.

47. - What is his hame?

48. - His name is Sambo.

49. - Hey Stevie, what are you doing?

50. Leave the goat alone.

51. - But Mom, this is his bedtime bath.

52. He's gotta go to sleep.

53. - This is the third time that you've washed him.

54. Poor thing he's not going to have any skin left.

55. - See Mom, he likes it.

56. - Oh I can see that alright.

57. - You guys ready?

58. Let's go!

59. - Come on, hurry!

60. - Come with me quickly!

61. - Come on get them!

62. - Mommy!

63. - Mommy.

64. - Come on Sambo.

65. - Come on!

66. - My goat!

67. - There's the mother and the kid, get her!

68. Hurry up go together.

69. - Open the door!

70. Open the god damn door

71. we want to talk to you!

72. - Break the god damn glass!

73. - What's happening? - Oh god.

74. - Where'd she go? - I don't know.

75. - Check the first room, hurry.

76. There come on through the window.

77. - Come on hurry, out the front!

78. - Who are you, what do you want with us?

79. Go away, go away!

80. - Come on!

81. - Please leave me alone.

82. Leave me alone!

83. - Shut up! - Leave me alone!

84. - Shut up! - Leave me alone!

85. - Hey hey girls, the boss is coming.

86. - You girls wanna work for me?

87. You'll make a lot of money working for me.

88. I've got some of the best action in town.

89. I got places that's better than any casino in Vegas.

90. Isn't that right?

91. - That's right boss. - Right, right.

92. So you like them Mr. Feliciano.

93. - Yeah you did real good, you did real good.

94. You've got a lot of classy broads here though.

95. They'll be real good for the place in Beverly Hills.

96. I want you to take them all there, okay?

97. - Okay.

98. - I got something special for you in mind.

99. So you stay here.

100. - Okay boss, let's go.

101. - Hello?

102. Boss, it's for you.

103. - Yep?

104. - Hey boss, we got the kid.

105. - You're husband owes us six million dollars.

106. When you get it, walk on Hollywood Boulevard

107. near the Chinese theater and we will see you.

108. Any police and you will never see your kid again.

109. - Oh god. - Well.

110. - Oh no. - What are you going to do?

111. - I don't know.

112. I guess go to Hollywood police station.

113. - These are my girls, these are my actresses here.

114. Hey what are you doing?

115. Dirty dogs.

116. Hey how would you like to be an actress?

117. - Have a good day.

118. - Thanks a lot.

119. - Thank you.

120. - Hey Deb, how's business today?

121. - Okay how are you doing Turk.

122. - Give me one of your best.

123. - Why don't you keep that, it's on me.

124. - Aw you go ahead and take it.

125. - No you keep it. - Okay.

126. I'll tell you what,

127. why don't you keep this warm for me okay?

128. - Okay whatever you say.

129. - Hey what's happening over there.

130. - I don't know, but I sure feel sorry

131. for the people who have to deal with him.

132. - Him, who is he?

133. - He's Turk.

134. - Turk, who's that?

135. - He's a cop.

136. - He is? - He's a good cop.

137. - Really? - Yeah.

138. - I wonder if maybe he might be able to help me.

139. - I'm sure he can.

140. - Hey you guys what's happening?

141. - Hey Turk.

142. The manager of the hotel called and said

143. that three men are holding a married couple in a room.

144. Near as we can figure it's a rape and robbery in progress.

145. - So what the hell are you guys waiting for?

146. - Lieutenant Maxwell's coming.

147. - With what the fucking cavalry?

148. By the time he gets here, they'll have raped the guy too.

149. Come on.

150. - Hey easy, it's alright!

151. What the hell do you want?

152. - It's the fucking manager!

153. - Hold on to her.

154. Yeah, who the fuck is it?

155. - It's the fucking manager,

156. now open the fucking door!

157. - Go get the bastards.

158. - What are we gonna do?

159. - We're gonna separate brother.

160. - Right on.

161. - No hey.

162. - Take the stairs.

163. Don't be a god damn fool!

164. You see anyone?

165. - Yeah, he came this way, I hit him.

166. - Okay, he's gotta be down here, let's look around.

167. - Hey hold it!

168. Hold it!

169. Do something will ya?

170. Look Mr. I know this guy just fucked your wife,

171. he's our prisoner now so.

172. How about backing off okay?

173. Sir, wait, please!

174. Let us have him, the law's gonna punish him, okay?

175. - No law, he has dishonored me.

176. My law says his life now is mine!

177. - Three people are dead,

178. one officer wounded.

179. And McKay is still in the john puking his guts out.

180. You're a fucking maniac Turkey.

181. - Look, Captain, I was just trying to use some common sense.

182. - Well well, did you hear the Lieutenant Maxwell?

183. Probably, would have, well well.

184. Maxwell, we're gonna close down the forensics lab,

185. we're gonna close down everything,

186. we don't need them anymore.

187. We got a fucking clairvoyant on the force.

188. God dammit, if you had waited just a little longer

189. Lieutenant Maxwell would've arrived,

190. nobody would've been killed.

191. - With all due respect sir,

192. now who is being clairvoyant.

193. - God dammit, don't you play smart ass with me Turkey.

194. I'll bust you so low in the department,

195. you'll make the word failure a bad name, you got that?

196. - Yes sir, Captain.

197. - You should've waited for me like you were supposed to.

198. - You were late as usual.

199. - Get the fuck out Turkey, out!

200. - Hey Turkey, come get your hot dog.

201. - Hey, is that thing still hot?

202. - Yep.

203. - Hey what's with the girl over here?

204. - She's a little upset, her son got kidnapped?

205. - Yeah, kidnapped? - Kidnapped huh?

206. - Hey put some mustard and ketchup on that for me.

207. - K.

208. - Hi, how you doing?

209. - Fine. - What's a matter?

210. What are you crying for?

211. So what's the problem here?

212. - Three days ago I came here and every day I come here

213. they tell me nothing!

214. I want my child!

215. - Alright alright, calm down now.

216. Look you made the report you've got to give

217. the police some time, they'll find him.

218. - What was the officer's name you reported it to?

219. - I don't know, some guy named Officer Maxwell.

220. - Oh shit.

221. - Great, I'll tell you what.

222. - Let's grab some coffee.

223. - Yeah, let's go sit down and talk about this somewhere.

224. - Why?

225. - We'll get it all worked out.

226. Hey thanks a lot, hey you have a good one too George.

227. You wanted one extra cream right.

228. - No I have enough thanks.

229. - Oh okay, let's go over this from the top now.

230. From what I understand from the note

231. the kidnappers left behind,

232. they think your husband still has six million dollars

233. that belongs to them.

234. - That's what I understand too.

235. But you see, I couldn't find my husband,

236. he left me a year ago.

237. - Do you have any papers, documents, or anything at all

238. that we can use to investigate his whereabouts?

239. - Yes, I left everything with Lieutenant Maxwell.

240. - Good, tell you what Jaguar, get the files off of

241. Maxwell's desk and make a copy of it for me okay?

242. - That's what I thought.

243. - Right.

244. Look you got a place to stay while you're here in town?

245. - No, not really.

246. - Well, um,

247. I just inherited this place from my aunt.

248. The decor leaves something to be desired but,

249. it's got an extra room and you're welcome to it

250. if you want to stay there.

251. - Sure.

252. - No strings attached.

253. - That would really be nice.

254. - Okay.

255. - You better be behaving yourself boy.

256. - I got my bad dog here.

257. You're gonna watch that window, that window, that window

258. and that door, and you've been giving us nothing

259. but a bad time!

260. And I don't know how long you're gonna stay here

261. because of your damned father!

262. But if you get out of line, he's gonna eat you for dinner,

263. do you understand?

264. - Yes.

265. - I'm just sick and tired of you, do you understand?

266. - Yes sir.

267. - Alright go go.

268. - Alright, let's go finish the game.

269. - Damn baby sitters I can't believe it.

270. You understand?

271. - Yes sir. - Louder!

272. - Yes sir.

273. - Yeah throw 'em in boys, I got her.

274. Beat you Animal.

275. Alright.

276. - You lost to the man Animal.

277. - You didn't win fuck head.

278. - You don't do shit right.

279. - Come on dog, come on I want to talk to you.

280. Please, come on.

281. I know that your kidding.

282. Listen, I like dogs, you know I had me a goat.

283. But when I get out of here I'm gonna get me a dog.

284. Dogs are better, they understand better.

285. You understand don't you?

286. What's your name, you must have a name.

287. I want to be friends with you.

288. I've got to get out of here.

289. I want to play with you, but I have to see my mom.

290. You're gonna help me aren't you.

291. I know you like me.

292. Come on, come here, come on put your hand up here.

293. Okay I'll tell you what, I'll put one finger

294. on the windowsill, and you put one finger too.

295. Now put another.

296. Now put all my fingers and you put your hand up there too.

297. Now we're friends.

298. - Boy this is some rough shit.

299. - Hey J can you poor me a little spot of that?

300. - You got it.

301. Oh by the way, this is for you.

302. - What's this?

303. - Joe Fresno, the kid's father.

304. - Oh yeah, what'd you find out on him?

305. - Well, seems like after the death of big Alberto Donello,

306. three of his soldiers robbed his widow,

307. walked away with six million dollars.

308. Your Joe Fresno helped him to carry it away.

309. Mrs. Donello, she filed a complaint but three days later

310. she withdrew it.

311. - Oh, bet your ass she did.

312. I mean if the mob's involved in this thing,

313. they sure as hell don't want the cops in on it right?

314. - That's right.

315. - You know something, I don't even think we've got a case

316. for the police here.

317. In fact, I'm beginning picture now.

318. I'm beginning to get the picture.

319. When Joe Fresno double crossed his buddies,

320. and then he skipped out with all the loot.

321. - That's what he did.

322. - And then the three body guards of Donello's

323. they just kept looking around until they finally found

324. her and the boy.

325. You know something, she told me that Joe Fresno

326. had a cousin who's a championship wrestler.

327. - What's his name?

328. - Samson.

329. - Shouldn't be too hard to find, a champion Samson.

330. Let's go look for him, cheers.

331. - Yeah cheers.

332. - Yeah, here's to finding my boy.

333. - Hey, don't worry about it now, we're gonna find him okay?

334. - Ladies and gentlemen put your hands together

335. for oiled up women!

336. Here we go, three, two, one go, ladies go!

337. We've got a match right here, oh my god!

338. - You have a relative at the bar that wants to see you.

339. - Relative, what relative?

340. - I don't know, she's a lady.

341. - Alright, I'll be right there.

342. Here hold this.

343. - You want to see me?

344. - Yes I did, I'm Rebecca.

345. Joe Fresno's wife.

346. - Rebecca, right.

347. Joe talked a lot about you, how are you?

348. - Very well.

349. These are my friends, this Johnny Turquoise.

350. - How you doing? - Hi Turnover, how you doing?

351. - This is Jaguar.

352. - Hi Tiger.

353. - We need your help, I need to find my husband Joe.

354. - I don't know, Joe doesn't want anybody to know

355. where he's been.

356. - Yeah well look, his boy's very sick.

357. No we've gotta get ahold of him,

358. the little kid wants to see him.

359. - Well, for his wife and son.

360. Here's the address.

361. - Samson, Rebecca tells me you were a championship wrestler.

362. What are you working in a place like this for?

363. - Pays the bills you know what I'm saying.

364. - Looks like lightweight stuff to me.

365. - Hey don't be so sure about that.

366. Don't let these pretty women fool you,

367. they're pretty tough.

368. - I'll wrap 'em around.

369. - You want to put some money on it?

370. I'll get you in the ring, I'll show you what it's all about.

371. - You got a 20 dollar bet?

372. - I got 20 bucks.

373. - Hey wait a minute, we got business to take care of.

374. - Hey, I'll wrap 'em up in a second.

375. - That's right, come on Turnip put your money up here.

376. - Put it up for me partner.

377. - You stay here, Jaguar and I will take a look.

378. Hey, Fresno we just want to talk!

379. - Hey hold up Turk.

380. Turk, hey Turk, hey wait a minute ladies I'm working,

381. I'm working right now.

382. - God dammit, just want to talk!

383. Come on Fresno!

384. Look you son of a bitch, I just want to talk to ya!

385. - Wait!

386. Wait you guys break it up!

387. What are you doing, it's me Rebecca!

388. - Becca.

389. What are you doing here?

390. - It's Stevie, they took him, they kidnapped him

391. now they're holding him for the money.

392. The money that you took from them!

393. I want my child, do you hear me?

394. I want my child now! - Alright, I'll get him back.

395. I'll get him back.

396. Oh god.

397. Alright.

398. I know where to reach them.

399. We'll get Stevie back.

400. - Then let me help ya.

401. - Who the hell are you?

402. - I'm a friend of hers and I want to help!

403. Now let's go get the money now!

404. - Let's go get the money.

405. - Wait a minute, it's not that easy.

406. I need three days.

407. - I can't wait three days and Stevie can't wait three days.

408. I want my child now.

409. - Maybe I can get back earlier.

410. When I get back, where can I reach you.

411. - She's gonna be at my place,

412. I'll give you the address.

413. - Eat your sandwich before you pass out.

414. - I don't want a sandwich I want my mom!

415. - Shut up!

416. - You shut up!

417. - Get back here you little chicken shit.

418. Stay there.

419. Damn it, the damn kid doesn't want to eat either.

420. - I don't give a shit if he wants to eat or not.

421. The only reason we need him alive is for the money.

422. - If he doesn't eat he doesn't stay alive.

423. - Who gives a shit.

424. - Oh no, we're out of booze,

425. Hey Ramone, Ramone!

426. - Yeah?

427. - Listen, when you're in LA pick up some beer

428. and some whiskey okay?

429. - Okay I'll get it.

430. - I'm thirsty.

431. - Hi fellow, want to help me?

432. I figured a way to get out of here.

433. But I have to unlatch that latch.

434. Are you gonna help me?

435. Thank you, but wait a minute.

436. I have to see what those bad guys are doing.

437. - You know something man, you never give a shit

438. for anything do you?

439. Why don't you give a shit because there's

440. six million reasons why, you know that?

441. - Alright, alright.

442. - Throw me that lighter. - Stay here all the time

443. with you.

444. Stuck with a god damn moron.

445. - Hey fuck you, and the horse you rode in on.

446. - What would I do with your wife?

447. Hey Ramone, go feed that damn dog now.

448. - Alright, I'm going.

449. - Help me, help me.

450. - Hey dog, dog, hey Spaghetti,

451. come take a look around the building.

452. - Come on dog, come on.

453. - You moron, the kid's gone!

454. I told you to watch him!

455. - Go get McKay!

456. - Go on go that way, hurry!

457. - Come on dog, come on.

458. - Hurry up I found him.

459. - Come on dog, come on.

460. - I saw him go this way, come on!

461. We got you now you little twerp!

462. Now I got you, you little twerp!

463. - Somebody help me!

464. - Shoot the dog, shoot it!

465. - I'll kill you, you little twerp!

466. - God dammit.

467. - Did you see what he did to me?

468. - You'll kill the boy man!

469. - I don't give a shit.

470. - Tell the boss you asshole,

471. six million dollars, Jesus Christ.

472. Idiot!

473. - Mommy, Mommy.

474. - It's alright kid, you'll be alright.

475. You don't do anything right!

476. - Hey don't worry boss, I just called Spaghetti.

477. The kid's hurt bad but he's not dead.

478. - Thought I didn't have it, well here's the damn money.

479. Alright, now listen.

480. You and Rebecca stay in the boat with the money.

481. According to my arrangement with Feliciano,

482. before handing him the money, I have to see Stevie.

483. - Hm, I don't like it.

484. I think we ought to get some back up.

485. - No way, it was hard enough convincing him

486. that you were my brother in law and had to be there as well.

487. Believe me Rebecca, I know what I'm doing.

488. - Yeah, and I know the kind of guys we're dealing with,

489. we're gonna need some help.

490. - I said no man!

491. - No Joe, wait, wait!

492. - Guy's making a big mistake.

493. - Please, please do as he says.

494. I want to see my child.

495. - Rebecca, I don't like it alright.

496. - Please.

497. - Okay, let's go.

498. Guess we ought to just wait for you here huh?

499. - Don't forget, you're my brother in law.

500. - Right.

501. - Don't worry babe, I'll get Stevie back.

502. Everything will be alright.

503. - Hey, come on, don't worry.

504. - Hey Spaghetti, Spaghetti come here!

505. - Well what do you know, Joe Fresno.

506. I'm gonna call the boss.

507. - You son of a bitch,

508. you thought you could get away with it.

509. - Where's my son?

510. - Hey Spaghetti?

511. - Yeah boss.

512. - Take this sucker to see his kid.

513. - Come on sucker.

514. - Jesus I wish we brought some help.

515. - No, no, please just give him the money

516. so I can get my child back.

517. - Hi son.

518. I've come to take you home Stevie.

519. - No, I hate you, you left Mom and me.

520. - I'll explain everything later,

521. right now let's just get out of here.

522. - Not with you, I'd rather die right here

523. than go with you.

524. - Son,

525. I'm sick.

526. I've been sick for quite some time.

527. I have blood cancer.

528. Sometimes Stevie, it hurts, very much.

529. I'm in real pain.

530. So I had to take drugs.

531. I drank too much.

532. You see, Stevie I never told your mother about my trouble.

533. She just through I was some kind of bum.

534. We started arguing all the time, fighting.

535. So I had to leave.

536. I risked my life to make some money for you and your mother.

537. Stevie, I never expected anything like this to happen.

538. - If you really loved me, you could've come and see me

539. once in a while.

540. - I did, I came to see you Christmas eve.

541. I was outside the house watching you through the window.

542. Why, I even got you a present.

543. I put it upstairs in the attic, in the store room.

544. - Is it still there?

545. - It sure is son.

546. - Okay I forgive you.

547. - Thank you Stevie, thank you.

548. You're my son.

549. And I love you.

550. We gotta go.

551. Your Mother's here.

552. - Really? - Yeah.

553. - Where is she? - She's outside.

554. - Come on.

555. - First the money.

556. - Come on.

557. - Animal, get the money.

558. - Okay boss, I'll get the money.

559. Okay boss!

560. Thanks ugly!

561. - Okay, the kid can go.

562. - Mommy Mommy!

563. Mommy I missed you!

564. - I missed you too honey.

565. Oh look what they've done to you, my son.

566. - Here's the money boss.

567. - It's fake, get him!

568. - Daddy Daddy!

569. - Wait Stevie, Stevie come back here!

570. - Come on, come on hurry up, get the kid,

571. don't hurt the mother.

572. - Daddy Daddy!

573. - Kill that son of a bitch!

574. - Daddy Daddy!

575. - Shit, stay down!

576. - Oh god, don't take my baby!

577. - Get him!

578. - Give me the kid, come on you!

579. - Get him, get him hurry up!

580. - Wait here 'til I get back.

581. - I'll kill you son of a bitch, I'll kill you!

582. - Don't shoot, don't shoot!

583. We're gonna get shot, I'm getting the hell out of here.

584. - He's getting the fucking gun!

585. - Let's go! - Oh shit!

586. - So long you fucking asshole!

587. - You stupid man, are you happy?

588. - Rebecca, let me talk to him.

589. Look Joe, listen to me.

590. We can't save you but we can save your boy now,

591. where's the money?

592. We gotta have the money in order to save him.

593. Come on.

594. - Your Momma and Daddy in Beverly Hills,

595. know you smoke this boy?

596. - Yeah.

597. - I bet.

598. - How many time I gotta tell you, you ain't Clint Westwood.

599. - I know I'm not, I'm a lot younger.

600. - Two more dead.

601. - Hey, what are you always counting bodies for?

602. You think you're a fucking mortician or what?

603. - Who made the bodies?

604. - Look captain, there's a guy in the hospital

605. named Spaghetti, I gotta talk to him.

606. - You ain't talking to anybody.

607. You know something Turkey, I want your badge on my desk,

608. 'cause you are fired.

609. - You can't fire me now Captain,

610. I'm the only guy who can save the kid!

611. - Ah don't flatter yourself.

612. - Blow it out of your asshole.

613. - I want your badge on my desk.

614. Lieutenant, you take over, if he interferes,

615. you arrest him for obstructing justice, is that clear?

616. - With pleasure Captain. - Like any civilian.

617. You know what you've done for me?

618. The commissioner's on my ass, I get gas.

619. Every day ends with a Tums festival right now

620. because of you I've gotta go to the bathroom.

621. I want your badge on my desk.

622. And if you're here, well you better the hell be gone

623. by the time I'm back, you got that?

624. Asshole.

625. - Yes sir!

626. - Your ass has bit the dust, Rose, come here.

627. - Yes sir.

628. - I want a 24 hour guard on Spaghetti's hospital room

629. and I don't want anyone going in there,

630. and that includes civilian and former officer Turquoise.

631. - You're really good Max, you know I can see

632. you weren't born yesterday,

633. because nobody could get that fucking stupid in 24 hours.

634. - Stop Turk out, out!

635. - Dr. Mansfield,

636. Dr. Mansfield report to X-ray.

637. Dr. Crane report to the registrar.

638. - Hey Rose.

639. So how's the most beautiful gal in the force doing today?

640. - No dice Turkey, you're not getting into that room.

641. - But Rose, you know I came to see you.

642. - You're so full of shit your baby blues are turning brown.

643. - Okay, okay, so I can't fool ya.

644. But I gotta tell ya, if you had a sweater on

645. I'd love to pull the wool over your eyes.

646. - How romantic.

647. - Look seriously, there's a little kid out there

648. that needs my help.

649. I gotta get in to see this guy if I'm gonna help him.

650. And besides that, you know as well as I do,

651. I've always thought you were a classy lady.

652. I do.

653. - Dr. Bronson, Dr. Stewart.

654. - I'm gonna make this real quick.

655. - Don't move, want me to pull hard?

656. - Oh how does it feel?

657. - They sent me down to relieve you Rose,

658. go get a bite to eat.

659. - Yeah well you just take care of your buddy.

660. - Don't worry about him, just hurry back.

661. I'm off duty soon.

662. - Turk, not bad.

663. - Does it hurt Turk?

664. - Oh shut up.

665. I gotta get in there.

666. - Hey, Bonano knows your 50 feet within this place,

667. he'll have your balls in bronze, you know that Turk.

668. - I don't care.

669. What are you gonna do, shoot me partner?

670. - You know better than that.

671. - Don't be afraid, I just want to drink your blood.

672. Or maybe kill you.

673. Hurts like a bitch don't it?

674. Where's the kid you son of a bitch?

675. - Ah your hurting me!

676. Oh for god's sake!

677. - Where's the boy?

678. - Alright alright, all I know

679. is that Feliciano was calling a guy the name of Fong.

680. He wanted to use his house.

681. - Who the fuck is Fong?

682. - No, where the fuck is Fong?

683. - He owns a place called Heaven on Earth in Beverly Hills.

684. It's a high class cat house.

685. - Good, very good now.

686. Which one of you slime balls hit the kid?

687. - Come on Turk.

688. - Which one?

689. - Animal, it ain't me I swear.

690. - Yeah, sure.

691. - Shit.

692. - Hi.

693. - Hi how you doing?

694. - May I see your membership card please?

695. - Membership, oh yeah, see I just joined last week,

696. and I came by today to pick up the card.

697. You got it for me?

698. - Mr. Tung will help you.

699. - Yes gentlemen, can I help you?

700. - Yes you can Mr. Tongue.

701. - The name is Tung.

702. - Oh that's okay kid, I can't say chivalry either.

703. - Yes very true, I saw that commercial too.

704. Yes, what can I do for you sir?

705. - Yes well I just joined the club last week

706. and I came by to pick up my membership.

707. And I thought I'd bring a guest with me.

708. He very rich man, he saves all his welfare checks

709. for years now.

710. - What is your name sir?

711. - My name is John Turquoise the third.

712. - Sorry sir, I don't seem to have your name here.

713. - What!

714. My name is, I can't believe this I paid a fortune

715. for this membership.

716. I can't tolerate this, not a minute longer.

717. Fong's a friend of mine, I want to see him right now.

718. Now!

719. - Well sir, there is no such name?

720. - Get the fuck out of here?

721. - What did you say?

722. - Get the fuck out of here!

723. - Wait a minute please, please.

724. Your name should be in my book.

725. Perhaps, my most private membership book.

726. - Oh, private membership, of course.

727. - Turquoise, Turquoise.

728. Sir I still don't see and your name here.

729. - Private members huh, and I'm not on it?

730. The names and addresses of all of them in here

731. and I'm not in it?

732. I think we better see my friend Mr. Fong now.

733. - Oh no sir, I ring the bell sir.

734. No sir, I only ring the bell sir.

735. - We rung it.

736. We rung it, oh shit.

737. Turk, let's get the hell out of here.

738. - Sir, Mr. Fong wants to see you.

739. - Oh my friend Fong, I'll introduce you.

740. You're gonna like him.

741. - You sure you want to do this?

742. - He's a nice guy, you'll like him.

743. - Sir book, sir book!

744. - Well look at this, Fong's redecorated his office.

745. - Fun's over, give me the book.

746. - Oh no wait a second, we came here to see Fong.

747. - Give me the book.

748. - Gotta see Fong right?

749. - Give me the book! - He fuck off!

750. - Look out!

751. - Let's go find my friend Fong.

752. Unfucking believable or what?

753. - Hello sir, can I help you?

754. - Well now. - 68.

755. - You mean 69.

756. - No a 68, I eat you, you get what you want.

757. - Later.

758. - About that woman.

759. - Whoa, come on.

760. Hi everybody.

761. - Hi judge.

762. - I'm not a judge, I'm a senator.

763. - He's a senator dummy, he's not a judge.

764. Come on, excuse us judge, come on.

765. - Hey bro, what's happening, what you feelin' man?

766. - He looks familiar.

767. - The dude we busted a month ago for cocaine!

768. - Cocaine? - Yeah!

769. - I'm prince from Africa, get out!

770. - Pardon the hell out of us.

771. Go back to doing what you do.

772. - Have a nice day friend.

773. - Come in the hot tub.

774. - Thank you baby.

775. - Okay boss.

776. - Gentlemen can I help you?

777. - Jaguar, meet my friend Fong.

778. - May I ask what you want?

779. What the fuck are you doing with that book?

780. - I understand you know a guy named Feliciano.

781. Can you tell us where he can be found?

782. - Feliciano, I don't know anybody by that name.

783. - You listen to me, and listen to me good bruh,

784. this guy has snatched a little kid

785. and taken him to your place.

786. - Kidnapped, my place?

787. You guys are cops.

788. - Bingo, and we want this guy bad.

789. Now you turn him over to us, and we won't even tell him

790. that you told us, and you get your book back.

791. - You won't arrest me?

792. - I won't even arrest you, promise.

793. - Alright.

794. They're at the end of Priceret Road and Mt. Wilson.

795. - Thank you very much.

796. Now listen, I'll meet you at the corner of Hollywood

797. and Las Palmas okay?

798. I got some biker friends to meet.

799. And since I promised him I wouldn't arrest him,

800. you arrest the asshole.

801. - What?

802. You guys are lying pricks!

803. - Not pricks, dicks.

804. - Shit.

805. - Hey Elephant, Elephant, it's Turk.

806. Shut up you guys, it's the cop that helped you out

807. the other day.

808. - Yeah, that's right, what does he want?

809. - He's in trouble, needs help.

810. - Where's he at?

811. - I got it.

812. - Let's get a bunch of the guys and give him a hand.

813. - Come on!

814. - Hey get outta here.

815. - Let's go.

816. - You sure we have enough help?

817. - I'm positive, don't worry about a thing, it'll be alright.

818. Got some guys that are gonna help us

819. and we'll get your boy back okay?

820. Uh oh.

821. - Had my ass in a vice, had to tell him.

822. - Hey what's happening Max?

823. - Yeah yeah, alright you're under arrest asshole

824. for possession of a concealed weapon.

825. - What the fuck are you talking about, I'm a cop?

826. - You were a cop.

827. Do you know who I am?

828. Why, did you forget your name?

829. - Cuff him!

830. - Aw Maxie.

831. - Do it!

832. - Are you tired of me, the man's a cop.

833. - A former cop.

834. But Nano busted your ass.

835. You're just a civilian now.

836. - So tell me Max, how's Tom?

837. - Who's Tom.

838. - Are you so busy enjoying your little victory here

839. that you've forgotten your own son?

840. - What the hell's that got to do with us?

841. - What do you meant what the hell

842. does that got to do with us?

843. It's got everything to do with us.

844. I've seen his picture on your desk, he's a little seven

845. year old boy, blonde hair, cute as a bug.

846. Well there's another little kid out there

847. just like Tommy, Max!

848. He's out there and he's been taken away from his mother.

849. - Jesus Turkey.

850. - You know that little boy had to watch his father die

851. right in front of his eyes.

852. But I'll tell you something, even though his father

853. was just a punk thief, when it came to his kid

854. he put himself between the bullets and his boy.

855. Would you do the same for Tommy?

856. - Well sure Turkey.

857. - Your damn right you would.

858. Well you're holding all the aces right now.

859. Now sure you can book me and turn me in and go by the book,

860. but by the time your done the kid will be dead.

861. You know damn well those creeps won't let the boy live

862. after they get what they want.

863. They don't want a living witness.

864. What if it was Tommy Max?

865. I mean think about it.

866. What if he was out there, all alone,

867. wanting his mother and father.

868. - God dammit Turkey, where do we find the kid?

869. - On Mount Wilson,

870. by the way you got another shotgun in the car?

871. - Yeah.

872. - Come on. - Thank you Max.

873. - We might have better luck if we take the car

874. and go around to the back side, come on.

875. - What do you got?

876. - How we doing baby?

877. - Hi, pretty bad.

878. - Fucking losing.

879. - That's right.

880. - Don't worry, I'll fuck him.

881. - Woo, alright.

882. - Give me those cards.

883. - Oh yeah.

884. - Oh is Marcerito done?

885. - Yes for the brat.

886. - Hey that's my kind of drink.

887. - I think Stevie's around back, in the back bedroom.

888. - Okay.

889. - Let's go around the back.

890. - Who is it?

891. - Stevie, Stevie, it's your Mommy and Turk.

892. - Mommy, Mommy!

893. - Shh!

894. - Mom, get me out of here.

895. - Stevie it's okay, we're gonna get you outta here.

896. - Go back over and sit down, act like nothing's happening,

897. okay?

898. - I want to do it on the floor.

899. - What do you mean you want to do it on the floor?

900. - I like it on the floor.

901. - I don't like it on the floor, I bruise easily.

902. - I like bruises.

903. - Okay Stevie, help me push this up.

904. - Shh, be quiet.

905. Stevie, we're gonna get you outta there.

906. - That a boy.

907. - Mommy Mommy, get me out of here.

908. - Okay, let me help you.

909. - Mommy Mommy!

910. - Oh Stevie, oh my boy.

911. - Hey Tito come on, the kid's gone and ran away!

912. - Oh shit, god dammit.

913. Jesus Christ you bunch of idiots!

914. You let the kid get away.

915. I'll cut your livers out, you go that way!

916. - You go there, I'll go there.

917. - Here you drive, come on Stevie, come with me.

918. Get down, stay down okay.

919. - Come on let's go after him, okay let's go.

920. - Hey Ramone, come on pronto!

921. Come on let's go.

922. Go go go!

923. - Let's go get them!

924. - Oh god I got hit!

925. - Let me out, don't let me burn!

926. - Okay so we know where he is,

927. but are the woman and kid in there?

928. - We'll have to watch until we find out.

929. You keep an eye on the house,

930. I'll go call Mr. Feliciano.

931. - Boss, here's your guy.

932. - You've been stealing from me!

933. - Hey come on!

934. - You've been stealing from me?

935. How much do you owe me?

936. How much, how many thousands you got before?

937. - 10 thousand.

938. - Boss, telephone for you.

939. - Wait a minute, you owe me you son of a bitch.

940. Your life is mine, you got that.

941. You'll work for me as long as I tell you to

942. until that debt's paid off, got it?

943. - Yeah boss. - You got it?

944. Hello?

945. - Found the house Mr. Feliciano.

946. - Well it's about time I got some good new.

947. - Yeah, I'm gonna have the house watched around the clock.

948. - Yeah, I'll send you two more men.

949. - Mom, when are we gonna go home?

950. - Wait a minute here,

951. I thought you just said you liked it here?

952. - I do, but I miss my goat.

953. - We'll be leaving soon.

954. - Hey Stevie, you want to go play the video game?

955. - Sure.

956. - Remember how to turn it off?

957. - Yeah.

958. - Okay, don't break it now okay?

959. - Okay.

960. - What a kid.

961. - I think it's time that we both go home.

962. Steve's already made enough of a mess.

963. - No, I don't think that'd be a good idea at all,

964. not until we get this Feliciano guy.

965. Don't think for a minute he's gonna give up

966. until he gets the money.

967. - Well I have to be at least going to get

968. some of my belongings.

969. I mean we have hardly anything to wear.

970. - Well, I guess I could drive you out there tomorrow,

971. we could pick up a few things.

972. - You've done so much already, I feel like such a burden.

973. - Don't worry about it, I can handle it.

974. - I think that I'm going rather fond of you also.

975. - I think I can handle that too.

976. - And I think I might be in love with you.

977. I think I do love you.

978. - Nice place. - Thanks.

979. Gosh, I know this house is gonna be a mess,

980. I left in such a hurry.

981. - That's alright.

982. Can't be any worse than mine.

983. - What a mess, look what they've done to my house!

984. - Ah shit, looks like we've had some unexpected visitors.

985. Sons of bitches, they really tore this place up didn't they?

986. They were after that money.

987. - Mommy Mommy!

988. Mommy Mommy come up here!

989. - Stevie what are you doing up there?

990. - I'm just trying to get the present that Daddy left me.

991. He said he was here Christmas eve and he put it up there.

992. - I wonder what he's up to, are you sure Stevie?

993. - I'm sure, he wouldn't lie to me he loves me.

994. - Well let me take a look up there.

995. Come here, let me give you a hand down.

996. Getting bigger all the time Stevie.

997. Jeez, this thing's heavy.

998. Whoa, look at this!

999. - Look at that money, look at that!

1000. We are rich!

1001. - So much.

1002. - Rich, look at that.

1003. - That's money, where's my present?

1004. - What, where's your present?

1005. Hey kid I got news for you,

1006. your present's here, Santa Clause came early,

1007. and it looks like he's moving in with you permanent, jeez.

1008. - More than a thousand.

1009. - Oh yeah. - Yeah.

1010. Six million dollars.

1011. - Could be that, at least.

1012. - Jeez I've never seen this much money in one place.

1013. - What is it, I didn't hear anything?

1014. - I don't know, I was sure I heard something.

1015. Come on let's get the hell out of here.

1016. - Oh well hello there brother in law.

1017. Why I bet you've got something in that bag

1018. that belongs to me, don't ya?

1019. So put it down.

1020. So drop the bag.

1021. - Sure here have it.

1022. Here take this.

1023. - Go around this side, yeah that's it.

1024. Yeah, Ramone, get around behind there.

1025. Get over there on the other side, there you go.

1026. Okay guys you follow me, come on guys.

1027. - Hurry come on, hide him down there.

1028. Oh shit, they got us blocked in here hold this.

1029. - Mommy look out!

1030. - Let's get out of here!

1031. - Let's go get him! - Yeah sure.

1032. - Russian, get up there.

1033. Animal, you come with me.

1034. - Here.

1035. Okay, it's loaded.

1036. Look, find a hiding place for you and Stevie

1037. and stay put. - Okay.

1038. - Use that if you have to.

1039. - Okay Stevie, now you're gonna have to hide okay?

1040. Looks like there's a place in here.

1041. Here, go in here, it's okay,

1042. I'll be back in just a little bit okay?

1043. - No I want to go with you Mom.

1044. - No it's okay, it's okay just stay right there.

1045. I'll be back in just a little bit.

1046. - There's the son of a bitch!

1047. Okay we got him now Andy, you got that way.

1048. - Boss, he went this way!

1049. Relax honey, just drop the gun.

1050. I'm not gonna shoot ya I'm just gonna screw

1051. your brains out.

1052. Okay honey, you don't shoot me, I won't shoot you okay?

1053. - Hey, oh hello there.

1054. Looks like you've run out of luck.

1055. Drop the gun pal.

1056. - John!

1057. Let's go get Stevie, let's go get my child.

1058. - Look at this.

1059. It's all yours.

1060. What are you gonna do with all that money?

1061. - I'm gonna buy a bunch of lottery tickets

1062. to become a millionaire.

1063. - Oh yeah?

1064. Maybe you can figure out how we're gonna get out of here.

1065. - Oh I don't know, I don't care.

1066. I'm just glad to have my boy back.

1067. - So you got the kid huh?

1068. - Oh yes sir, we sure did.

1069. - Well I guess you deserve to be congratulated Turkey.

1070. - Not really sir, I gotta tell you,

1071. it was Lieutenant Maxwell here.

1072. He did the whole thing, I mean it was his guidance

1073. and inspiration— - Alright Turkey,

1074. don't lay it on too thick.

1075. Good work Maxwell.

1076. - Well sir, in all fairness it was Turk who found the place.

1077. - Nonsense, Max it was you, you did it all.

1078. - A lot but.

1079. - Will you cut the crap you two guys.

1080. It was the force who did it, the force!

1081. - Exactly captain.

1082. - Well Turkey, I guess you deserve to have it back.

1083. - Thank you sir.

1084. - I'm glad you two aren't fighting anymore,

1085. because you're gonna be working together from now on.

1086. - What!

1087. - Wait a minute captain, I think we might just be

1088. stretching things a little bit here.

1089. - Captain, this man and I have been partners for years.

1090. I mean this man is like a brother to me.

1091. - Like brothers.

1092. - I have a special detective for you.

1093. - I don't care!

1094. - I want you to meet detective Alexandra,

1095. and I want you to work with her.

1096. - Hello Sargent.

1097. - On the other hand Captain I think that Sargent Turquoise

1098. could learn a great deal from Lieutenant Maxwell.

1099. What's your name again honey?

1100. - You can call me Alex.

1101. - And you can call me anytime.

1102. - Come on Turquoise, maybe it wouldn't be so bad.

1103. - Shit, I feel like a guy who's been shipwrecked

1104. on an island with is wife.

1105. - You don't have a wife.

1106. - Your wife then.

1107. - Oh.

1108. Captain how about that dinner?

1109. - Screw the dinner, you got any tums?

1110. I need some god damn tums.

1111. - You know the little woman, we've been waiting for a—

1112. - Alright Maxwell.