1. You've heard of the tunnel.Copy !req
2. The one we all go through
sooner or later.Copy !req
3. At the end, there's a door.Copy !req
4. And waiting for you on
the other side of that door...Copy !req
5. is either heaven...Copy !req
6. or hell.Copy !req
7. This is that door.Copy !req
8. Why is this patient
in lockdown?Copy !req
9. They didn't tell you
about Laurie Strode?Copy !req
10. No.Copy !req
11. You must have heard of her.
Sister of Michael Myers?Copy !req
12. Michael Myers,
the serial killer?Copy !req
13. Well, you'll hear
all the gossip soon enough.Copy !req
14. For now, let's just get—Copy !req
15. No, no, no, wait.
Tell me about her.Copy !req
16. She decapitated a man.Copy !req
17. Aah!Copy !req
18. Oh, my God. Why?Copy !req
19. Halloween.
Three years ago.Copy !req
20. Twenty years after
the first murders...Copy !req
21. her brother finally found her.Copy !req
22. Tracked her down to the school
where she was working.Copy !req
23. There were several murders.Copy !req
24. Lots of confusion.Copy !req
25. Guys, over here!Copy !req
26. Oh, my God.
She killed the wrong person.Copy !req
27. Unh!Copy !req
28. Father of three.Copy !req
29. Why didn't the paramedic
say something?Copy !req
30. His larynx had been crushed.Copy !req
31. Don't let on you know.Copy !req
32. Hello, Miss Strode.
Did you enjoy your dinner?Copy !req
33. She hasn't said a word in years.Copy !req
34. Extreme disassociative disorder.Copy !req
35. The doctors think
she's a suicide threat.Copy !req
36. They found her up
on the roof more than once.Copy !req
37. Must be the guilt.Copy !req
38. Now all she does
is stare out that window.Copy !req
39. God knows
what she sees out there.Copy !req
40. Hello?Copy !req
41. Anyone out there?Copy !req
42. Boooo!Copy !req
43. - Holy shit!
- Ha ha ha!Copy !req
44. Harold, are you trying
to give me a heart attack?Copy !req
45. No.Copy !req
46. How the hell
did you get out again?Copy !req
47. And who are you
supposed to be today?Copy !req
48. Oh. John Wayne Gacy.Copy !req
49. Born in Chicago, Illinois,
on March 17, 1942.Copy !req
50. Come on, big guy.Copy !req
51. Killed 33 people.
Buried them under his house.Copy !req
52. I know, Harold.Copy !req
53. - He was executed on May 7—
- I know, Harold.Copy !req
54. Willie, I'm not trying
to criticize your work...Copy !req
55. but if you put Harold
in his room...Copy !req
56. how come I see him
in the basement?Copy !req
57. I—But just
two seconds ago, he was—Copy !req
58. Come on. Let's go get him.Copy !req
59. How many times
do I have to tell you?Copy !req
60. You gotta be sure
what you're doing.Copy !req
61. Willie?
What are you doing?Copy !req
62. I skipped dinner.Copy !req
63. - Hurry up.
- OK.Copy !req
64. Harold?Copy !req
65. Harold,
what are you doing down here?Copy !req
66. What's gotten into you?Copy !req
67. Aah! Aah!Copy !req
68. Aah! Unh!Copy !req
69. Aah!Copy !req
70. Hmm. Ted Bundy.Copy !req
71. Born November 24, 19...Copy !req
72. Hello, Michael.Copy !req
73. I knew you'd come for me
sooner or later.Copy !req
74. What took you so long?Copy !req
75. You failed, Michael.Copy !req
76. You want to know why?Copy !req
77. Because I'm not afraid of you.Copy !req
78. But what about you?Copy !req
79. Are you afraid of me?Copy !req
80. Are you afraid to die, Michael?Copy !req
81. I just have to be sure.Copy !req
82. Unh! Unh!Copy !req
83. Aah!Copy !req
84. Aah!Copy !req
85. Aah!Copy !req
86. Aah!Copy !req
87. I'll see you in hell.Copy !req
88. Michael Myers.Copy !req
89. Born October 19, 1957.Copy !req
90. Killed his older sister,
October 31, 1963.Copy !req
91. Killed 3 high school students,
October 31, 1978.Copy !req
92. Also killed three nurses
and a paramedic, same night.Copy !req
93. Was believed to be dead,
then killed four students...Copy !req
94. Was believed to be dead,
then killed four students...Copy !req
95. Hillcrest Academy, 1998.Copy !req
96. Has been missing, unheard of,
last three years.Copy !req
97. Now he's back.Copy !req
98. Carl Jung tells us...Copy !req
99. that the human psyche
contains...Copy !req
100. a figment of ourselves...Copy !req
101. that even the collective
unconscious denies.Copy !req
102. Good morning, Paul.
It's nice to see you in class.Copy !req
103. Am I keeping you up?Copy !req
104. What do I mean by all this,
people?Copy !req
105. I mean that inside all of us...Copy !req
106. there lurks
a dark, malevolent figure.Copy !req
107. A kind of boogeyman,
if you will...Copy !req
108. that Jung called what?Copy !req
109. Stick with me, people.Copy !req
110. Take that Kierkegaardian
leap of faith.Copy !req
111. Jung said we must
face down our fears...Copy !req
112. and face up to the figure
he called... what?Copy !req
113. - The shadow.
- The shadow.Copy !req
114. Yes, Sara, very good.
Thank you.Copy !req
115. I'm glad somebody was awake.
Wow, what a class.Copy !req
116. Hey, Sara!Copy !req
117. Sara, wait up!Copy !req
118. I've been looking for you
everywhere.Copy !req
119. Guess what?Copy !req
120. Uh-uh. What did you
sign us up for this time?Copy !req
121. Eee, ha ha!
We gotta find Rudy. Come on.Copy !req
122. Hey, Rudy.Copy !req
123. Don't distract me.Copy !req
124. I can't help myself.Copy !req
125. I am distracting.Copy !req
126. Have you checked your email?Copy !req
127. No.Copy !req
128. Why?
Did you send me something?Copy !req
129. We're in!
They picked all three of us!Copy !req
130. - What? Are you serious?
- Uh-huh!Copy !req
131. Oh, God! Yes!Copy !req
132. All right. That is all good.Copy !req
133. This isn't one of
your little jokes, is it?Copy !req
134. No, but Sara doesn't want to go.Copy !req
135. I might go.
I just haven't decided yet.Copy !req
136. No, no, no.
That is unacceptable.Copy !req
137. It is unacceptable.Copy !req
138. We're gonna be bigger
than "The Osbournes."Copy !req
139. We're gonna be large.Copy !req
140. Every time I let you two
talk me into something...Copy !req
141. I live to regret it.Copy !req
142. Listen, without me,
you would die of boredom.Copy !req
143. Us! Without us,
you would die of boredom.Copy !req
144. Whatever.Copy !req
145. Are you sure they're not
just putting us in some house...Copy !req
146. with hidden cameras
in the shower?Copy !req
147. No.Copy !req
148. It's like we're
investigative reporters...Copy !req
149. searching a crime scene.Copy !req
150. And look at the scholarship.Copy !req
151. Yeah.Copy !req
152. Besides that,
thousands of people...Copy !req
153. are going to see my face...Copy !req
154. our face.Copy !req
155. Don't do it.Copy !req
156. That's the house
where it all started.Copy !req
157. He walked its hallways,
hid in its closets...Copy !req
158. dreamed in its bedrooms...Copy !req
159. helped his mother
in the kitchen...Copy !req
160. watched TV in the living room
with his dad...Copy !req
161. played in his sister's bedroom.Copy !req
162. Then one day,
he picked up a knife...Copy !req
163. and he never put it down again.Copy !req
164. That guy's fucking weird.Copy !req
165. Don't pay attention to him.
He's trying to scare us.Copy !req
166. I just need to send
a quick email.Copy !req
167. "Deckard...Copy !req
168. "you'll never believe
what I got myself into."Copy !req
169. Deckard? Who's Deckard?Copy !req
170. Oh, it's my screen name.Copy !req
171. Sara needed some tech support
setting up her offline reader...Copy !req
172. so I, uh...Copy !req
173. You told her
you're a graduate student?Copy !req
174. - Graduate of what, junior high?
- Shut up, all right?Copy !req
175. We talk every day.
It's kind of like we're dating.Copy !req
176. She's never even seen you...Copy !req
177. and Yahoo chat rooms
do not count.Copy !req
178. Yes, they do count.
Did you know in the old days...Copy !req
179. knights used to spend
their entire lives...Copy !req
180. courting ladies that
they would never even touch?Copy !req
181. They would just send
each other sonnets and stuff.Copy !req
182. That's before
internet porn, man.Copy !req
183. Whatever.Copy !req
184. Now what are you doing?Copy !req
185. Just give me a second,
all right?Copy !req
186. I hope Sara shows up.Copy !req
187. And wearing
something acceptable.Copy !req
188. She can't still be mad at us
for the last time.Copy !req
189. Here she is. Hey!Copy !req
190. OK, everybody listen up!Copy !req
191. Sara, are you gonna wear this?Copy !req
192. I thought I told you
we were gonna be on camera.Copy !req
193. I'd like to start this off
by saying the search is over.Copy !req
194. You six have been selected...Copy !req
195. to explore
America's worst nightmare—Copy !req
196. tomorrow night, Halloween...Copy !req
197. live, in front of the whole
entire internet universe.Copy !req
198. You six will enter
the birthplace of evil...Copy !req
199. in its purest form—Copy !req
200. the childhood home of
our most brutal mass murderer...Copy !req
201. Michael Myers.Copy !req
202. Thank you. Thank you.Copy !req
203. So, what do you hope to find
in the house tomorrow night?Copy !req
204. My way into
network broadcasting.Copy !req
205. Pfft!Copy !req
206. I just want to say
that Michael Myers...Copy !req
207. is not just
a man behind a mask...Copy !req
208. he's a legend.Copy !req
209. I'm interested
in how Michael Myers...Copy !req
210. embodies
the politics of violence...Copy !req
211. embedded in pop mythology.Copy !req
212. Never underestimate
the effect of a poor diet.Copy !req
213. Too much protein, not enough
zinc, next thing you know...Copy !req
214. you're cutting up bodies
in your bathtub.Copy !req
215. Look at Hitler.
He was a vegetarian.Copy !req
216. The brother
was seriously malnourished.Copy !req
217. You don't have to go far
to find Michael Myers.Copy !req
218. He is the great white shark
of our unconscious.Copy !req
219. He is the dark-eyed child
of our spirits.Copy !req
220. He's every murderous impulse
we've ever had.Copy !req
221. He's the little voice
that whispers to us...Copy !req
222. to strangle the old lady...Copy !req
223. taking too long
at the checkout counter.Copy !req
224. Get to know him, baby.Copy !req
225. He's you.Copy !req
226. Tell us, Sara, why do
ordinary people turn to murder?Copy !req
227. Well, I, um...Copy !req
228. I think it has something
to do with upbringing.Copy !req
229. Aah!Copy !req
230. Damn! That girl can sing.Copy !req
231. That's what
I'm looking for. Ooh.Copy !req
232. Ha! Hunh!Copy !req
233. Hyah!Copy !req
234. Get his ass! Get his ass!
Get his ass!Copy !req
235. Who's better than Wat Chun Lee?Copy !req
236. Whoopin' everybody ass
while he's smokin' a cigarette.Copy !req
237. Oh, shit. Who's knockin'
on my door this late?Copy !req
238. Whoever this is
is distracting me...Copy !req
239. from seeing Wat Chun Lee
whoop some ass.Copy !req
240. Sara? Ooh.Copy !req
241. Sara, what are you doing here?
It's late.Copy !req
242. I'm dropping out.Copy !req
243. What?Copy !req
244. I'm sorry.Copy !req
245. It's just I'm so freaked out
I can't even sleep.Copy !req
246. Slow down, slow down.
What's the problem?Copy !req
247. Can't you see
I'm not like the others?Copy !req
248. I know
you're not like the others.Copy !req
249. You know
you're not like the others.Copy !req
250. The others ain't nothin'
but a bunch...Copy !req
251. of smart-ass, wise-crackin',
posin' wannabes.Copy !req
252. You are the real deal.Copy !req
253. Every existing element
about you...Copy !req
254. is what the internet audience
really wants.Copy !req
255. I don't want to be famous.Copy !req
256. What do you mean
you don't want to be famous?Copy !req
257. That's the American dream.Copy !req
258. I think I'm just scared.Copy !req
259. It's OK to be scared.Copy !req
260. Being scared is good.
Fear is good.Copy !req
261. Fear motivates.Copy !req
262. Fear gives you
the feeling of being alive.Copy !req
263. Fear makes me want to throw up.Copy !req
264. Trust me, please.Copy !req
265. When it's all said and done,
at the end of the day...Copy !req
266. you'd be surprised of
how much you surprise yourself.Copy !req
267. I'm sorry to bother you.
I just—Copy !req
268. It's OK. Do me a favor.
Sleep on it.Copy !req
269. We'll talk about it tomorrow.
You can sweat it tonight, man.Copy !req
270. Now take your tail on outta here
and go to bed.Copy !req
271. Ol' Freddie boy, damn, you good.Copy !req
272. Shit you come up with
off the top of your head, boy.Copy !req
273. Why don't you just
pat yourself on your back?Copy !req
274. Oh, Wat Chun Lee! Oh!Copy !req
275. Now, are you coming out soon...Copy !req
276. or are you
planning on subletting?Copy !req
277. Mmm! Sexy girl! Ha ha!Copy !req
278. Don't you think
it's a bit too revealing?Copy !req
279. I think
it's perfectly revealing.Copy !req
280. Aah!Copy !req
281. What?Copy !req
282. Are you OK?Copy !req
283. Did you see the
boogeyman or something?Copy !req
284. The boogeyman?
How very Jungian.Copy !req
285. Dr. Mixter's class?
I'm taking that course, too.Copy !req
286. I hope they have this in black.Copy !req
287. - Thrift stores.
- Oh, how marvelous, darling.Copy !req
288. Ahh, there she is.Copy !req
289. Oh, my God,
you've been pussy-whipped.Copy !req
290. What's worse,
you've been cyber-whipped.Copy !req
291. By the way,
where's your costume?Copy !req
292. I can't go out tonight.Copy !req
293. I promised Sara
I would watch her first episode.Copy !req
294. She's really nervous about it.Copy !req
295. No, Mickey Stern's party
is tonight, and you know that.Copy !req
296. Oh, yeah. I'm sorry, man.
I guess I forgot.Copy !req
297. Forgot?
Do you have any idea...Copy !req
298. what it means for
two freshmen to get invited?Copy !req
299. It's never happened before!Copy !req
300. Your sister invited us...Copy !req
301. so you wouldn't tell
your mother about her tattoo.Copy !req
302. That's besides the point,
Myles Barton.Copy !req
303. You can sit here in your little
dream fantasy world...Copy !req
304. or you can come with me
to this party...Copy !req
305. and learn to walk like a man.Copy !req
306. What's it gonna be?Copy !req
307. All right, let's go.Copy !req
308. Ahh, chat room romance?Copy !req
309. He's just a friend.Copy !req
310. He's probably fifty and bald,
with a bad toupee.Copy !req
311. - Jen.
- Probably collects human skin.Copy !req
312. Give me a break, Jen.Copy !req
313. OK, everybody listen up.Copy !req
314. I'd like to start off
by saying...Copy !req
315. the home that
you will be entering tonight...Copy !req
316. has been rigged up
with several cameras...Copy !req
317. but for the most part...Copy !req
318. the audience will see
only what you see.Copy !req
319. See these cameras right here?Copy !req
320. I kinda like these cameras.Copy !req
321. They can pretty much be
clipped on to anything.Copy !req
322. A hat, shirt collar,
your coat collar.Copy !req
323. The viewers
can pretty much control...Copy !req
324. what they want to watch...Copy !req
325. switch around
from camera to camera...Copy !req
326. depending on what seems to be
the most intriguing to them.Copy !req
327. So if you guys want
to be stars for the night...Copy !req
328. I suggest you do something
that is very interesting...Copy !req
329. so that it's worth the while
of the viewers...Copy !req
330. to want to keep
their cameras on you.Copy !req
331. Cameras are so phallic.Copy !req
332. Is that good or bad?Copy !req
333. Depends who's watching.Copy !req
334. Hey, Orson Welles,
pick a placement and move on.Copy !req
335. Look, low angles—scary.Copy !req
336. High angles—scary.Copy !req
337. Medium angles—boring.Copy !req
338. I bet you learned that
shooting...Copy !req
339. all those weddings
and bar mitzvahs.Copy !req
340. Hey, hey!Copy !req
341. I went to Long Beach State.
Same as Spielberg.Copy !req
342. Charley,
we're on a schedule here.Copy !req
343. Tell Max to rig a camera
in the sister's room.Copy !req
344. Max is back at the hotel
helping Freddie.Copy !req
345. OK.Copy !req
346. Freddie!Copy !req
347. Baby, calm down.
It's all good. Just relax.Copy !req
348. I got it all under control.Copy !req
349. There was this Firebird
parked in front of the house.Copy !req
350. Totally about to ruin
the establishing shot...Copy !req
351. but I called a tow truck.Copy !req
352. Yep, it's on its way.Copy !req
353. All righty. Bye.Copy !req
354. Look at you, Charley.
That's a nice angle, boy.Copy !req
355. Look, there he is now.Copy !req
356. All right, here we go.Copy !req
357. Mr. Harris!Copy !req
358. Can we ask you
a few questions, Mr. Harris?Copy !req
359. - Right over here.
- I got one word for you.Copy !req
360. - What's that?
- Product placement.Copy !req
361. - Oh, yeah?
- Yeah.Copy !req
362. Product placement,
I like the sound of that.Copy !req
363. While we're going
around the house...Copy !req
364. discovering the secrets
of Michael Myers...Copy !req
365. we could be drinking Pepsi
or sporting The Gap, right?Copy !req
366. Nice sexy thinking.
I kind of like that.Copy !req
367. How's everyone doing
this evening?Copy !req
368. We'll get it started
like this, see?Copy !req
369. In the next ten minutes...Copy !req
370. we are going to enter
a mystery...Copy !req
371. wrapped up inside of a riddle
inside of an enigma.Copy !req
372. Now, remember this.
Everything you see...Copy !req
373. absolutely everything
you see is real.Copy !req
374. There's no actors...Copy !req
375. none of the components
or contents in the house...Copy !req
376. have been messed with,
mixed up, diluted...Copy !req
377. or tampered with in any shape,
form, or fashion whatsoever.Copy !req
378. Now, I'm not exactly sure
what's gonna happen...Copy !req
379. but what I do know is
that no one will be allowed...Copy !req
380. to leave
until the show is over.Copy !req
381. Our state-of-the-art
camera surveillance system...Copy !req
382. will pick up
anyone who tries to sneak out.Copy !req
383. Let the Dangertainment begin
out this motherfucker.Copy !req
384. Well, people, let's do it.Copy !req
385. Rudy!Copy !req
386. Way to go.
This is gonna be fun.Copy !req
387. I read that
after the murders...Copy !req
388. the family
just sealed it up...Copy !req
389. and left without
taking anything with them.Copy !req
390. It's not exactly
a house you put on the market.Copy !req
391. Yeah, but I'll bet it has...Copy !req
392. one of those big nice
old kitchens, you know?Copy !req
393. Where are you going?Copy !req
394. I'm gonna check it out.Copy !req
395. What are we gonna do?Copy !req
396. We don't have to do anything.Copy !req
397. Technically,
we just have to be in the house.Copy !req
398. Aren't we supposed
to be looking for answers?Copy !req
399. The devil made him do it.
I'm done.Copy !req
400. We owe it
to the people watching...Copy !req
401. to at least take a look around.Copy !req
402. Oh, that's cute.Copy !req
403. You're already worried
about your fan base?Copy !req
404. You are this close
to getting voted off the island.Copy !req
405. Hey, check this out.Copy !req
406. You want something
tasty and delicious?Copy !req
407. You ever tasted
forty-year-old fennel?Copy !req
408. Eww, don't.
It's got to be rotten.Copy !req
409. - That's strange.
- What?Copy !req
410. - It smells fresh.
- Yeah, it does.Copy !req
411. You know, Donna,
you got great legs.Copy !req
412. What time do they open?Copy !req
413. That'd be 1:00?Copy !req
414. God damn.Copy !req
415. Sara.Copy !req
416. You think this is the one
that he used to do his thing?Copy !req
417. No. They'd keep that in
an evidence locker somewhere.Copy !req
418. Whew.Copy !req
419. - Boo.
- Aah!Copy !req
420. - What, are you scared?
- No.Copy !req
421. What's in here?Copy !req
422. What is that?Copy !req
423. OK, so I admit...Copy !req
424. that this place
is a little creepy, OK?Copy !req
425. No, no, no.
You have no idea.Copy !req
426. - Look at this.
- Wow, a chair.Copy !req
427. My God.Copy !req
428. Do you think they actually
kept him in this?Copy !req
429. What is that?Copy !req
430. Looks like the medieval key
to Sara's chastity belt.Copy !req
431. - Rudy!
- OK, yeah.Copy !req
432. Maybe we should
poke around a bit...Copy !req
433. see what else we can find.Copy !req
434. Ha! Aye-aye, captain.Copy !req
435. Why are you touching me?Copy !req
436. Don't.Copy !req
437. Go poke.Copy !req
438. Hey, what's going on?Copy !req
439. Sexy.Copy !req
440. Look at you!Copy !req
441. Scott, what are we doing here?Copy !req
442. Hey, come on, man,
be cool, all right?Copy !req
443. Relax. Have fun. Shit.Copy !req
444. Hey, Myles,
do you think anyone will know...Copy !req
445. we're supposed to be
from "Pulp Fiction"?Copy !req
446. - Huhh!
- Huhh!Copy !req
447. Today, you're scared of
the boogeyman.Copy !req
448. Ha ha ha!Copy !req
449. He's gonna get you.
He's coming behind you.Copy !req
450. Boogeyman!Copy !req
451. Ohh! Shit!Copy !req
452. Careful, Jen.Copy !req
453. Ahem. Hands off, bud.Copy !req
454. Bet this is Judith's room.Copy !req
455. You know, the older sister.Copy !req
456. The one he killed
when he was six years old.Copy !req
457. Hey! Keep the camera
on the money here.Copy !req
458. I think it happened
when she was right there.Copy !req
459. Poor little Judith...Copy !req
460. helpless...Copy !req
461. brushing her hair...Copy !req
462. young... and naked.Copy !req
463. Yeah, because
that's gonna happen, right?Copy !req
464. Come on, Jen.Copy !req
465. One flash,
and you could light up...Copy !req
466. a thousand computer screens.Copy !req
467. Launch your whole career.Copy !req
468. You think?Copy !req
469. You crack me up.Copy !req
470. It's a good wardrobe
for you, Jen.Copy !req
471. Wait! No! There was
somebody else in the hall!Copy !req
472. Come on.Copy !req
473. Come on, lover boy.Copy !req
474. - Whoa!
- Aah!Copy !req
475. What are you doing,
you big perv?Copy !req
476. They're exploring the house
of a mass murderer—live.Copy !req
477. You want to watch?Copy !req
478. - No way.
- Sure.Copy !req
479. Oh, OK.Copy !req
480. Impulse control disorder.Copy !req
481. Huh?Copy !req
482. That's my theory.Copy !req
483. I think Michael Myers
had fits of rage...Copy !req
484. that he could not control.Copy !req
485. Kind of like a klepto
or a nympho or a pyro.Copy !req
486. So, instead of
stealing silverware...Copy !req
487. he slashes the necks
of teenage girls, huh?Copy !req
488. Oh, come on...Copy !req
489. haven't you ever had an impulse
that you could not control?Copy !req
490. - Continuously.
- You mean continually.Copy !req
491. "Continuous" means
continuing uninterrupted...Copy !req
492. while "continual" means
reoccurring periodically.Copy !req
493. Donna, when are you gonna
get out of your head...Copy !req
494. and start thinking
with your body?Copy !req
495. Please.Copy !req
496. Does that line
ever actually work...Copy !req
497. on the chicks
in the music department?Copy !req
498. Art history, too.
Sometimes even poli sci.Copy !req
499. Well, it doesn't cut it
with critical studies.Copy !req
500. Bummer.Copy !req
501. Besides,
screwing a music major...Copy !req
502. would be tantamount
to lesbianism.Copy !req
503. I could get into that.Copy !req
504. Sara, I'm telling you,
it's in the food.Copy !req
505. Remember that guy
who was on trial...Copy !req
506. for murder in San Francisco?Copy !req
507. All he ate was Twinkies.Copy !req
508. Rudy, do you ever think about
anything other than food?Copy !req
509. Wouldn't you like to know?Copy !req
510. Jen?Copy !req
511. Jen?Copy !req
512. What's going on?Copy !req
513. - What happened?
- I don't know.Copy !req
514. I turned my back for a second
and she was gone.Copy !req
515. Jen!Copy !req
516. Jen?Copy !req
517. Jen?Copy !req
518. Jen.Copy !req
519. Jen?Copy !req
520. Jen?Copy !req
521. Jen?Copy !req
522. Turn it down!Copy !req
523. - Gotcha!
- God, you bitch.Copy !req
524. Slut!Copy !req
525. That's not right, OK?
You're foul.Copy !req
526. Uhh, so foul.Copy !req
527. This is to us,
for successfully—Copy !req
528. let me give you
a little more—Copy !req
529. puttin' together
something collectively...Copy !req
530. so ingenious
as a team and a duo...Copy !req
531. that we should definitely
be able to secure...Copy !req
532. a lot of food on the table
for ourselves...Copy !req
533. as long as everything
goes as nicely...Copy !req
534. as it's goin' right now.Copy !req
535. I'm gonna get her back
for that.Copy !req
536. Watch me.Copy !req
537. Oh, my God!Copy !req
538. Cheers.Copy !req
539. Oh, no! No!Copy !req
540. Mm. Mm.Copy !req
541. Wait, what just happened?Copy !req
542. - We just lost Bill's camera.
- Oh, shit.Copy !req
543. He must've dropped it.
Fucking idiot.Copy !req
544. Find another view quickly,
please.Copy !req
545. Freddie, relax.Copy !req
546. I think
this is going really well.Copy !req
547. - Really, baby?
- Yes.Copy !req
548. We are doing our thing.Copy !req
549. OK.Copy !req
550. To Dangertainment.Copy !req
551. Salute. Heh heh heh.Copy !req
552. And this must be the bed
where he was conceived.Copy !req
553. Stop showing off, Jen.Copy !req
554. Aaaah!Copy !req
555. Aaaah!Copy !req
556. Rudy!Copy !req
557. - Sara!
- Jen, help me!Copy !req
558. Are you OK?Copy !req
559. Rudy, help. Sara!Copy !req
560. Ewww.Copy !req
561. - God.
- What happened?Copy !req
562. What is that thing?Copy !req
563. Hey, is this
that Michael Myers thing?Copy !req
564. Yeah.Copy !req
565. A'ight, cool.Copy !req
566. Yeah, OK.Copy !req
567. What is this?Copy !req
568. Oh. Sorry.Copy !req
569. Are you?Copy !req
570. You're such a Lothario.Copy !req
571. Um...Copy !req
572. I don't know what that
means exactly, but...Copy !req
573. Just go with it.Copy !req
574. Hold on.
I just thought of something.Copy !req
575. Hold on?Copy !req
576. You've got to be kidding me.Copy !req
577. What, are you
looking for "Playboys"?Copy !req
578. This ain't right.Copy !req
579. Well, it's obvious
that the boy was subject...Copy !req
580. to emotional and physical abuse.Copy !req
581. No, all of this.
It's not right.Copy !req
582. It's too easy.Copy !req
583. Why is all this stuff
still here?Copy !req
584. Answer that, Nancy Drew.Copy !req
585. Where's Bill?Copy !req
586. He's probably
still mad at me.Copy !req
587. He's gonna jump out
of somewhere and scare me.Copy !req
588. You watch.Copy !req
589. You watch.Copy !req
590. Jim? Uh.Copy !req
591. You know, if I'm keeping you
from something...Copy !req
592. just let me know.Copy !req
593. Look.Copy !req
594. - Voilà.
- Clever boy.Copy !req
595. See,
they're looking for clues.Copy !req
596. Something that might explain
why Michael Myers went bad.Copy !req
597. - Oh.
- Jeez.Copy !req
598. Hey, Scott. What's up?Copy !req
599. God, nice costume.Copy !req
600. Whoa.Copy !req
601. Hey, you think
they kept him down here?Copy !req
602. Maybe. Look at this.Copy !req
603. What? What is it?Copy !req
604. It's some sort
of weird harness.Copy !req
605. This whole place looks like
some sadistic playpen.Copy !req
606. Ah ha ha.Copy !req
607. And you know what
that makes me think?Copy !req
608. What?Copy !req
609. There's definitely
no cameras down here.Copy !req
610. I could be a camera.Copy !req
611. Say something smart.Copy !req
612. Existence precedes essence.Copy !req
613. God, you are sexy.Copy !req
614. Whoa! Oh, shit!Copy !req
615. That worked perfectly!Copy !req
616. Whoa! That is
what I'm talking about.Copy !req
617. Oh, my God!
Oh, my God! All his victims!Copy !req
618. It's a mass grave!Copy !req
619. Oh, my God!Copy !req
620. Oh, God.Copy !req
621. All of his victims. Oh!Copy !req
622. Shit. Look at this.Copy !req
623. I don't
fucking believe this.Copy !req
624. What?Copy !req
625. Made in fucking Taiwan.Copy !req
626. Oh, shit, man!Copy !req
627. Charley,
where the fuck you been?Copy !req
628. We've been lookin' all over
this motherfucker for you!Copy !req
629. And why the hell are you
dressed like me anyway?Copy !req
630. I ain't payin' you
to be Michael Myers.Copy !req
631. I'm playin' Michael Myers!Copy !req
632. If them kids come around...Copy !req
633. and see us dressed up
in the same shit...Copy !req
634. you'll ruin the whole effect,
God damn it.Copy !req
635. What the hell
is wrong with you?Copy !req
636. What you lookin' at me
like that for?Copy !req
637. Huh? You don't get it?Copy !req
638. Your shit ain't workin'
up there?Copy !req
639. Take your ass in the back
of the garage with Nora.Copy !req
640. That's your job.Copy !req
641. Go back there with Nora
and help her ass out.Copy !req
642. Go do your job.Copy !req
643. I left the back door
unlocked for your ass...Copy !req
644. to go out the back
into the garage.Copy !req
645. That's what I did.Copy !req
646. You need to get the hell
outta here.Copy !req
647. Go on, scoot! Skedaddle!Copy !req
648. Get the fuck out of Dodge!Copy !req
649. God damn. What the hell's
somebody gotta do...Copy !req
650. to get a little decent help
up in this motherfucker?Copy !req
651. God damn it. Come on.Copy !req
652. Let's go find Freddie.Copy !req
653. This is bullshit.Copy !req
654. Hey, Jim?Copy !req
655. You gotta see this.Copy !req
656. Gross.Copy !req
657. Hey, Freddie.Copy !req
658. Is this all part of the setup?Copy !req
659. "Laurie Strode,
sister of Michael Myers...Copy !req
660. "survives Halloween night
massacre."Copy !req
661. Heh. Nice prop.Copy !req
662. Aah!Copy !req
663. Oh, my God!Copy !req
664. Oh, my God!Copy !req
665. Is anybody else seeing this?Copy !req
666. Jim?Copy !req
667. Aaah!Copy !req
668. Aaah!Copy !req
669. Aah! Oh, my God!Copy !req
670. No!Copy !req
671. Help! Somebody!Copy !req
672. Someone help! Oh, my God!Copy !req
673. This isn't funny anymore!Copy !req
674. Help me! Somebody help!Copy !req
675. This is not funny!Copy !req
676. Oh, my God!Copy !req
677. Stay away from me! Aah!Copy !req
678. Aah! Aah!Copy !req
679. Aah!Copy !req
680. Aah!Copy !req
681. That was so fake.Copy !req
682. No, no, wait.
Wait, you guys.Copy !req
683. That really happened.
She was just killed.Copy !req
684. Man, you're gullible.Copy !req
685. Get outta here.Copy !req
686. It's a good thing
there's no cameras in here.Copy !req
687. We're wearing cameras.Copy !req
688. Whoosh.Copy !req
689. Aaaah!Copy !req
690. Michael's here!Copy !req
691. I saw him!
He's in the house!Copy !req
692. He's here!Copy !req
693. Oh, my God.Copy !req
694. What's going on?
What you talking about?Copy !req
695. Don't do this, girl.Copy !req
696. You're bringing me down
on this beautiful evening.Copy !req
697. There's nobody here.
You're just bugging out.Copy !req
698. It's not funny, OK?Copy !req
699. - Stop it, OK?
- He's down in that room.Copy !req
700. There is 1, 2, 3, 4,
5, 6 people in the house.Copy !req
701. There's no Michael Myers here.
There's nobody.Copy !req
702. Listen,
I saw him right over there.Copy !req
703. He's in here?
Ooh. Michael Myers.Copy !req
704. Where's Michael Myers?Copy !req
705. Michael Myers!
I don't see nothing.Copy !req
706. - He was in here.
- You're bringing me down.Copy !req
707. Rudy, I saw—Aaaah!Copy !req
708. Rudy!Copy !req
709. Uhh! Uhh!Copy !req
710. - Fucker!
- Whoa, whoa!Copy !req
711. Turn off the cameras!Copy !req
712. - Get it back online.
- What's wrong?Copy !req
713. Cut to
a different camera angle.Copy !req
714. It's me. Freddie.Copy !req
715. Freddie.
What the fuck are you doing?Copy !req
716. Damn, man, you hit me...Copy !req
717. like I murdered
your fuckin' mother.Copy !req
718. Relax, man.Copy !req
719. I'm only tryin'
to give America a good show.Copy !req
720. So none of
this shit is real, right?Copy !req
721. Like the furniture...Copy !req
722. the photos,
all the fucked up toys?Copy !req
723. It's all fake.
We've been set up.Copy !req
724. You knew you didn't have
a show anyone would watch...Copy !req
725. so you set us all up
at our fucking expense, huh?Copy !req
726. What expense
are you talkin' about?Copy !req
727. You ain't contributed a dime
to settin' up this shit.Copy !req
728. Besides, don't nobody
want to see any of y'all...Copy !req
729. runnin' around
no empty house...Copy !req
730. possibly comin' up
with nothing any-damn-way.Copy !req
731. America don't like reality,
first of all.Copy !req
732. Second of all,
they think the shit is boring.Copy !req
733. They want
a little razzle-dazzle...Copy !req
734. a little pizazz,
a little thrill in their life.Copy !req
735. And us being the ones
that give it to 'em—Copy !req
736. I don't see
nothin' wrong with that.Copy !req
737. I did not sign up for this.Copy !req
738. Y'all need to do me a favor,
all right?Copy !req
739. Go along with this shit.
Don't blow it. Not now.Copy !req
740. You really have no idea...Copy !req
741. of how nicely
I worked things out...Copy !req
742. so that we all can receive...Copy !req
743. somewhat of a robust back end
when this shit is all over.Copy !req
744. I don't know what you want to do
about your share...Copy !req
745. but please
don't fuck it up for me.Copy !req
746. I want my money, a'ight?Copy !req
747. Now, if you don't mind,
I'd like to go...Copy !req
748. scare the shit out of some more
of these motherfuckers...Copy !req
749. so, I'm gonna get it crackin'.Copy !req
750. Y'all do what
the fuck y'all gotta do.Copy !req
751. See y'all. Ha ha ha ha!Copy !req
752. - All right.
- We have it.Copy !req
753. - Turn up the sound.
- Where'd everybody go?Copy !req
754. Ohh.Copy !req
755. There you are, Bill.Copy !req
756. So what
do you guys want to do?Copy !req
757. I don't know.
I could use the money.Copy !req
758. No. Fuck that.
I'm out.Copy !req
759. Me too. I quit.Copy !req
760. Boo!Copy !req
761. She must be going
for the first internet Emmy.Copy !req
762. You can't scare us, Jen.Copy !req
763. You're gonna have to do
better than that.Copy !req
764. You too, Freddie.Copy !req
765. Aaaaaaah!Copy !req
766. - Eww!
- How'd they do that?Copy !req
767. - Digital effects.
- No, it isn't!Copy !req
768. Hello. 911?Copy !req
769. Oh, my God.Copy !req
770. - It's locked!
- Fuck.Copy !req
771. Go in there!
Go in there now!Copy !req
772. Jim, run! Run!Copy !req
773. Ah!Copy !req
774. Oh! Aah!Copy !req
775. Uhh.Copy !req
776. Hey, Michael!
Yeah, I'm talking to you.Copy !req
777. You want a piece of me?Copy !req
778. You should try a little less
protein in your diet.Copy !req
779. Control some
of that aggression, huh?Copy !req
780. Want some of this, huh?Copy !req
781. I know what 911 is for!Copy !req
782. This is an emergency.
It's not a hoax.Copy !req
783. Motherfucker, come on.
Trying to fucking kill me?Copy !req
784. Come on!
You like sushi, motherfucker?Copy !req
785. You gonna fucking kill me?Copy !req
786. Oh, shit.Copy !req
787. Somebody...Copy !req
788. somebody out there,
please help us.Copy !req
789. Somebody, please help us.Copy !req
790. She really is
a very talented actress.Copy !req
791. Deckard.Copy !req
792. Deckard, if you're there,
please let me know.Copy !req
793. Who's Deckard?
Myles is Deckard.Copy !req
794. What do you mean?Copy !req
795. Deckard,
he's killing all of us.Copy !req
796. He's killing us.Copy !req
797. There he is!
Upper right!Copy !req
798. - Zoom in!
- Go to the other camera.Copy !req
799. Tell her
he's coming up the stairs.Copy !req
800. This isn't funny anymore!
Do something!Copy !req
801. Aah!Copy !req
802. - He heard her!
- Oh, my God.Copy !req
803. He's at the door!Copy !req
804. Get her out!Copy !req
805. Oh, my God.Copy !req
806. - No!
- It's too high!Copy !req
807. No!Copy !req
808. Aaah!Copy !req
809. I can't see you!Copy !req
810. Deckard, where is he?Copy !req
811. Tell her to go!Copy !req
812. - Now's her chance.
- Come on, go!Copy !req
813. My God. Everybody's dead.Copy !req
814. Where is he?Copy !req
815. I don't know.Copy !req
816. We got to get the fuck
outta here now.Copy !req
817. Come on. Let's go.Copy !req
818. Oh, shit.Copy !req
819. Aaah!Copy !req
820. So, you want to be
on Dangertainment?Copy !req
821. Let's see what you got.Copy !req
822. Waa—hyah!Copy !req
823. Hyah!Copy !req
824. Aah!Copy !req
825. Yo, Mike, come see me.Copy !req
826. Michael, come and see me!
Look at me!Copy !req
827. You wanna fuck with me, huh?Copy !req
828. You motherfucker.Copy !req
829. Haaa-yah!Copy !req
830. Let's get outta here.
Come on.Copy !req
831. You all right?Copy !req
832. I saw his room.Copy !req
833. He's been living underneath
this fucking house...Copy !req
834. for who knows how long.Copy !req
835. Probably the last 20 years.Copy !req
836. Come on.Copy !req
837. I swear on my soul...Copy !req
838. I had no idea.Copy !req
839. I swear.Copy !req
840. Aw, shit.Copy !req
841. Come on. Let's go.Copy !req
842. Oh, my God.
He cut the cable.Copy !req
843. Where the fuck is he?Copy !req
844. This is bad.Copy !req
845. Deckard, where is he?Copy !req
846. - No!
- Run! Oh!Copy !req
847. Aah!Copy !req
848. No.Copy !req
849. Uhh.Copy !req
850. Oh, no.Copy !req
851. Aaaah!Copy !req
852. Uhh!Copy !req
853. Aah!Copy !req
854. Aah!Copy !req
855. Uhh.Copy !req
856. You bastard!Copy !req
857. This is for Jen!Copy !req
858. This is for Rudy!Copy !req
859. For all of them!Copy !req
860. Oh, shit.Copy !req
861. Aah!Copy !req
862. Aah!Copy !req
863. Trick or treat, motherfucker.Copy !req
864. Aaaah!Copy !req
865. No!Copy !req
866. No!Copy !req
867. Aah!Copy !req
868. Uhh!Copy !req
869. Aaah!Copy !req
870. Ohh!Copy !req
871. Burn, motherfucker! Burn!Copy !req
872. Sara!Copy !req
873. Come on, come on!Copy !req
874. Uhh!Copy !req
875. Hey, Mikey!
Happy fucking Halloween!Copy !req
876. Sara? Sara Moyer?Copy !req
877. - Sara?
- Can we get a statement?Copy !req
878. Hey, we can go live now.Copy !req
879. What happened
with Michael Myers?Copy !req
880. Thank you, Deckard.
You saved my life.Copy !req
881. What's it feel like
to be a hero, Sara?Copy !req
882. How does it feel now
that it's all over?Copy !req
883. What makes you so sure
it's over?Copy !req
884. Excuse me.Copy !req
885. - Watch the camera!
- No more cameras!Copy !req
886. Dangertainment
is off the air.Copy !req
887. Why don't
y'all show some respect?Copy !req
888. Mr. Harris, would you like
to make a statement?Copy !req
889. What can you tell us
about Michael Myers?Copy !req
890. Michael Myers
is not a sound bite...Copy !req
891. a spin-off, a tie-in,
some celebrity scandal.Copy !req
892. Michael Myers is a killer shark
in baggy-ass overalls...Copy !req
893. that gets his kicks
off of killing...Copy !req
894. everything and everyone
that he comes across.Copy !req
895. That's all.Copy !req
896. We're done dancing
for these cameras.Copy !req
897. Let's get outta here, Sara.Copy !req
898. But how are you
feeling right now?Copy !req
899. Heh.Copy !req
900. How am I feelin' now?Copy !req
901. You wanna know how
I'm feelin' right now?Copy !req
902. Feel this!Copy !req
903. My camera!Copy !req
904. That's him, isn't it?Copy !req
905. I want to see his face.Copy !req
906. I want to warn you, ma'am,
it's not a pretty sight.Copy !req
907. All right.Copy !req
908. Come on, back it off.
Let's go.Copy !req
909. Wow.Copy !req
910. You're lookin' a little crispy
over there, Mikey.Copy !req
911. Like some chicken-fried
motherfucker.Copy !req
912. Well, may he never,
ever rest in peace.Copy !req
913. Hey, how's it going?Copy !req
914. You've gotta be kidding me.Copy !req
915. Another one?Copy !req
916. It's your lucky night.Copy !req
917. You got a celebrity.Copy !req
918. Ooh, let me get
my autograph book.Copy !req
919. I'm not kidding.
It's Michael Myers.Copy !req
920. What?Copy !req
921. Get me a copy
of that autograph.Copy !req
922. - Yeah, sure.
- Ha ha!Copy !req
923. It's cracking me up.Copy !req