1. "Safety first"...
that's my motto.
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2. When one is doing
dangerous work,
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3. one must pay careful attention
to the safety of one's body,
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4. know what I mean?
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5. Aah.
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6. But one day,
I'll be a camp counselor,
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7. and I'll be running this place.
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8. I'll be shaping and molding
youthful minds
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9. into a focused worldview.
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10. Yep.
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11. Ernest P. Worrell,
camp counselor,
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12. an extraordinary thing
to witness.
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13. Aah!
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14. Ugh! Ugh!
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15. Aah!
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16. E-e-e-e-e-w.
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17. Ah heh heh heh heh
heh heh heh heh heh heh.
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18. Aaaaah!
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19. Okay, off the bus!
Off the bus!
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20. Come on! Let's go!
Let's go! Let's go!
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21. Get a line.
Get a line going.
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22. Get a line going.
Let's go.
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23. Let's go.
Move quick. Move it.
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24. Let's go, gentlemen!
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25. Let's go!
Move it out!
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26. Hey, fellas.
Welcome to Kamp Kikakee.
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27. I've got everything fixed up
for you at the cabins,
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28. know what I mean?
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29. Well, look who's here, huh?
Just like old times, huh?
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30. Yeah. Remember all the
fun we had last summer?
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31. Hey, let's start things off
right. What do you say?
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32. Mm-hmm.
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33. My ha...
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34. My ha...
my... ha...
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35. my hand... hands!
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36. You got a bad attitude,
son.
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37. Let's go! Let's go!
Move it!
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38. Let's go! Let's go!
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39. Straighten up these lines.
Come on. Let's go.
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40. Men...
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41. Welcome to another great summer
here at Kamp Kikakee!
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42. Right here
on this very ground,
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43. Indians once tested
their young braves
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44. and taught them the ways
of the forest.
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45. And right here, you'll be
tested and taught, too,
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46. just as they were hundreds
of years ago...
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47. swimming...
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48. fire building, cooking,
camping...
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49. archery,
wilderness survival.
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50. For those of you who accept
the challenge,
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51. there'll be a ceremony
of the blade... the stone...
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52. and the arrow.
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53. All right, guys...
Let's go!
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54. Hup!
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55. Hup!
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56. Hup! Hup!
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57. Hup! And up!
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58. All right, hit the deck...
push-ups.
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59. Crank out 10.
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60. Ready...
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61. One!
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62. Two!
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63. Three!
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64. Four!
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65. Five!
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66. Six!
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67. Seven!
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68. Nine...
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69. Morning, Ernest.
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70. Oh, hi, Miss St. Cloud.
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71. Um...
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72. The sun rides high...
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73. in... its path...
across the heavens.
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74. Where... is the red...
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75. chaise lounge?
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76. Ernest, what I
came down here for is...
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77. You know, engineering
your lifeguard stand
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78. is an important business.
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79. You have got to figure
your angles just right.
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80. Course, I won't always be
fixin' things around here.
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81. One day I will be
a full-fledged counselor.
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82. I have learned all the steps
in the path of the brave,
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83. I have memorized
the handbook,
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84. and I learned
the Kikakee sign language.
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85. If only they'd give a fella
a chance.
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86. I'm sure they will,
Ernest.
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87. Nuh-uh.
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88. But the real reason
I'm here
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89. is to see if you've gotten
all your shots.
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90. Shots?
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91. Yeah...
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92. Okay.
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93. How's that grandfather
of yours nowadays?
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94. I haven't seen him around
lately.
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95. Oh, he's out at his place.
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96. I worry about him sometimes.
He's so old.
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97. But these woods are
his home.
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98. Yeah, he's a wise man.
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99. Doesn't believe in
modern things like... shots.
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100. That's right.
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101. He lives by the old ways.
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102. In fact, he thinks I'm
wasting time studying medicine.
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103. Shouldn't you, uh,
have a little more practice
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104. before you go around
stickin' needles in people?
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105. I've had lots of practice.
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106. If I keep doing it,
I might even get good at it.
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107. See? A... cold, wet nose.
Color's good.
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108. No fever.
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109. Come on, now, Ernest.
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110. You know this isn't
going to hurt...
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111. much.
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112. I can take it,
Miss St. Cloud.
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113. Real men can take it,
and I'm a real man...
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114. a man with a hearty smile,
a stout back...
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115. with grit in his teeth
and nails in his knuckles,
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116. a man who has never
tasted quiche...
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117. Is that
your smallest needle?
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118. I did it!
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119. I took the Lindbergh baby!
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120. I am Josef Mengele!
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121. Owwwwww!
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122. Well, as you men know,
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123. our camp's been selected
by the governor's staff
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124. to take part in his, uh, program
for disadvantaged youngsters.
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125. He calls it, uh,
"Second Chance. "
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126. Some camps have
all the luck.
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127. And I just got notification that the second-chancers
are gonna be ready to be picked up today,
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128. and I wanted you guys
to be prepared for it.
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129. Better hide
your wallets.
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130. Yeah, and get out
your brass knuckles.
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131. We're already short-handed. How are
we gonna handle those delinquents?
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132. Oh, they're not
delinquents.
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133. They're just boys from a bit
rougher environment than most of us.
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134. You mean
underage criminals.
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135. No, they're not.
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136. They're all residents of
the State Institute For Boys,
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137. but they're not criminals.
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138. Stennis, I'm gonna let you
be their counselor.
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139. Why do I get stuck
with them?
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140. Because you've got
the most experience.
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141. Besides, after you get
to know those boys...
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142. Oh, I'm not gonna take
any crap off of them.
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143. If they get out of line,
I'm gonna knock 'em back in.
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144. Ross, Ross...
listen to me.
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145. Just do the best
you can.
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146. If you can't handle it,
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147. - We'll have no
choice. We'll have to send them back.
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148. Oh, I can handle 'em
all right.
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149. Yeah, a little discipline is
probably just what they need.
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150. Uh, Ernest,
will you take the bus over
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151. and get those
second-chancers for me?
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152. Aah!
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153. Boy, I can't wait
to get outta here.
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154. Anyplace is better
than this dump.
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155. Shut up, you two.
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156. Last warning...
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157. you get out of line,
and you don't go.
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158. Ooh.
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159. All boys in Section 6,
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160. report immediately
to the exercise yard.
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161. Hi, fellas.
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162. Of learnin' the ways
of the forest
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163. and the path of the brave
and that sort of thing?
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164. If you ask me, this second-chance
stuff is a total waste of time,
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165. Mister, uh...
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166. Oh, uh, Worrell...
Ernest P. Worrell.
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167. I don't envy whoever has to
look after this bunch of punks.
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168. They're trouble
all the way.
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169. My motto is,
"I never met a bad kid. "
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170. Then let me introduce you
to some.
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171. These misfits were selected
by their ward officers
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172. as those most in need
of help.
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173. This is the ringleader,
Bobby Wayne.
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174. He's been in and out
of institutions like this
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175. since he was 11.
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176. Since I was 9.
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177. And this is Crutchfield,
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178. 12 years old
and already a master thief.
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179. It's like a gift
or somethin'.
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180. Well, thanks.
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181. Uh, here's Danny Simpson.
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182. He comes from a long line
of troublemakers.
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183. It's a family tradition.
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184. I've got a reputation
to uphold.
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185. And the Albert Einstein
of this institution,
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186. Chip O zgood.
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187. Butch "Too Cool" Vargas.
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188. Hey, Moose!
Hurry up, man!
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189. It's Moustafa,
the runt of the litter.
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190. I told you...
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191. it's dangerous to run
with things in your mouth.
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192. Yes, ma'am.
I'm sorry.
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193. Uh, well, uh, all aboard
that's goin' ashore.
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194. Here we go...
life in the fast lane.
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195. Whoa. Nice bus.
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196. Does it run?
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197. Boy, we're gonna have
a great time this summer.
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198. We got boating
and, uh, campin'
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199. and swimmin'
and Indian Lore,
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200. and I've got everything
fixed up for you, too.
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201. Guess who!
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202. Uh, let's see.
Uh, Bobby?
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203. - No, no.
- No. - No.
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204. Uh, um, not Moose.
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205. It's not Ozgood.
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206. Now, don't tell me, really. Really,
I'm really good at this. I really am.
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207. - Let's see...
- Turn left, Ernest!
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208. Uh, Vargas.
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209. No!
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210. No? Okay.
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211. Hey, guys, when
the new campers get here,
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212. let's give 'em a big
Kamp Kikakee welcome, okay?
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213. Oh, the leader's
the biggest geek of them all.
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214. Not Crutchfield.
Crutchfield! That's it!
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215. I knew it was Crutchfield
all along.
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216. Ernest!
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217. What happened?
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218. Ernest wasn't watching
the road.
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219. All right, you guys move out.
This ain't a pleasure cruise.
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220. Come on. Move.
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221. You guys, line up.
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222. Frankly, I'm disappointed
in you, Ernest.
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223. I give you a simple task to
do, and this is what I get.
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224. I don't know how you can
ever expect to be a counselor.
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225. You're right,
Mr. Tipton.
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226. He's just not
counselor material.
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227. Uh, Mist... it's...
it's not my fault.
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228. All right, let's go.
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229. I was...
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230. I mean I was...
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231. I'm sorry, Mr. Tipton.
I'll try to do better.
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232. Gosh.
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233. Let's go.
Keep it moving.
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234. Well, this is it...
your home away from prison.
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235. Stennis, the delinquents
you ordered...
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236. all yours.
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237. Have fun, guys.
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238. The name's Stennis...
Counselor Stennis to you.
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239. Let's go. Move it.
Inside.
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240. All right,
get this place cleaned up.
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241. Mess hall, 10 minutes.
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242. What a dump!
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243. Here comes the riffraff.
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244. Looks like
"Last Chance" to me.
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245. Come on, gang.
Follow me.
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246. Well, well.
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247. Looks like daddy's little
gentlemen are glad to see us.
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248. Yeah, if white bread could
talk, it'd fit in right here.
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249. There's a lot of love
in this room.
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250. I can feel it,
and it's a beautiful thing.
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251. Yeah. I'm moved.
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252. Hi, fellas.
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253. Boy, do I have
something special prepared
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254. for your first day at camp.
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255. - Hey, what is this stuff?
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256. Oh, it's sugar puffs
with a gravy casserole
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257. with just a cuwcah of bologna-walnut
fudge in a pork marinade.
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258. I think it'll be a real boost
for the fiber of American youth.
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259. Isn't it, Jake?
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260. Why, of course it is.
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261. Doesn't smell too bad.
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262. Yeah, that's the guy
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263. who once ate two pounds
of modeling clay.
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264. Modeling clay!
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265. Yellow modeling clay!
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266. That's the secret ingredient
to eggs erroneous.
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267. We re-fuse the proteins
like bullion.
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268. Of course it would!
Uh, get back to work!
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269. Modeling clay...
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270. Modeling clay.
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271. Ugh!
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272. Oh! Ho ho!
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273. Did the little fellow
fall down and go boom?
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274. Looks like he needs
special classes in walking.
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275. Hey, dipstick, you ever pick on anybody
your own size, or just little kids?
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276. Hey, can I help it
if the kid can't walk?
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277. It was an accident.
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278. Accident, huh?
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279. Well... whoops!
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280. What do you know?
Another accident!
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281. There must be something
going around.
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282. Ugh!
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283. Stop it!
Stop it!
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284. What do you think
you're doing?
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285. - This!
- This!
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286. Oh, my God.
He can't breathe!
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287. Well, let's do something.
Come on.
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288. Come on, guys! I got him!
I got him! Guys, I got him!
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289. Back up!
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290. Hold steady, now!
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291. This ditch has got to go
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292. all the way to the waterfront,
gentlemen.
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293. Maybe by then some of the fight
will be out of your system.
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294. Man, this isn't fair.
They started it.
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295. Yeah, man!
They tripped Moose!
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296. You boys have got to learn...
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297. if you play... you pay.
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298. Hey, don't work
too hard, fellas.
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299. Yeah, life's a ditch,
guys.
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300. Can you dig it?
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301. I just want one clean shot
at blondie.
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302. Now, Eddie, if you don't
stir it, it'll clot on ya.
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303. Something burnin'?
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304. Here. Look what we got
for ya.
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305. E-e-w.
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306. Look at that.
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307. Jake's specialty du jour...
eggs erroneous.
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308. It's made with powdered eggs
and 17 herbs and spices
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309. smuggled into this country
by Tibetan monks.
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310. Ernest, I want you to cut
yourself a big knock
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311. out of
these eggs erroneous.
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312. No, I-I can't eat
on an empty stomach.
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313. Why,
of course you can.
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314. Eddie does, and look at
that rosy glow to his teeth.
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315. No.
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316. - Oh, come on, now.
- No.
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317. Now, Ernest, would
somebody dressed like this
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318. lie to you about food?
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319. Fond as I am
of Tibetan cooking,
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320. a hungry lion hunts best,
know what I mean?
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321. Now, come on.
Take you a little bite.
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322. No.
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323. - Come on, now.
- No.
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324. - Open big.
- No.
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325. - Come on.
- No.
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326. - Ernest...
- No!
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327. - Ernest!
- No!
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328. Eddie!
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329. It's time for the plane
to go to hangar.
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330. Ow!
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331. A rabbit, Jake!
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332. We could use a rabbit!
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333. Rabbit!
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334. That's it! A rabbit!
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335. A big, fat rabbit
with all of its shots!
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336. Hey, you boys got a look
all your own.
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337. - Who-oa!
- Should've been ready.
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338. You snooze, you lose.
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339. You just watch it!
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340. I'll get you!
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341. Whoa!
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342. Whoo!
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343. Whoa!
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344. Whoo-hoo!
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345. Whoa!
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346. All right.
Everybody to the line.
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347. Okay,
everybody in the water.
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348. Wow, this is great!
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349. Come on, Moose!
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350. Moose-tafa... Moose...
whatever they call you...
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351. now.
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352. So... you're the only one
that can't swim, eh?
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353. No... please.
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354. Well, you're gonna learn...
the Stennis way.
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355. No!
No!
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356. I can't swim!
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357. Help!
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358. Somebody help!
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359. Help!
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360. Thanks, Ernest.
I could've made it.
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361. Glad to help out.
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362. Well, meatheads,
we're gonna try this again.
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363. This time it's to the end
of the lake and back.
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364. Look.
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365. Everybody in the water.
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366. Whoa!
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367. Yeah!
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368. My leg.
My I...
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369. He's learning to swim
the Stennis way.
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370. My leg! Aah!
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371. It's a shame about
Counselor Stennis' accident.
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372. It was no accident.
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373. I don't know
what to do.
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374. I mean, it's important to make
the experiment work.
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375. Send 'em back!
Get 'em out of here!
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376. These guys have no respect
for anything.
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377. The main problem is we're
already short-handed.
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378. What we need is
another counselor.
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379. Hey...
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380. I got an idea.
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381. Ernest, uh,
have you ever had
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382. any group-leadership
experience?
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383. Uh, I had
an ant farm once.
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384. Close enough.
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385. How would you like to be
a counselor?
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386. Are you kiddin'?
Y-You mean a-a real counselor?
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387. A counselor like you guys,
a counselor?
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388. Just like us, Ernest.
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389. Uh, oh, Mr. Tipton, uh,
that's great.
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390. And... and I'll do
a great job... a great job...
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391. and I'll do
my regular work, too.
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392. Oh, I can't believe it's
true... me, a counselor.
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393. Oh, a-a real counselor.
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394. I can't believe it.
Oh, thank you, Mr. Tipton.
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395. Thank you,
thank you, thank you.
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396. A real counselor...
a really, really real, real,
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397. really, really, really,
real counselor.
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398. Thank you, Mr. Tipton.
Thank you.
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399. As your counselor,
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400. I will be taking you
deep into the forest
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401. in search of actual nature.
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402. We'll be traveling fast,
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403. moving light, keeping our ears
to the grindstone.
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404. So stay together,
be remindful of the weather,
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405. and, for Heaven's sakes,
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406. don't pick it,
or it will never heal.
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407. This guy looks like
a walking army-surplus store.
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408. The Salvation Army.
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409. I feel like the blind
are leading the stupid.
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410. What a loser.
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411. Hey, Rambo,
where are we goin'?
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412. Maybe he knows
a shortcut.
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413. Maybe we're lost.
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414. What is this,
"Wild Kingdom"?
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415. Yeah, boys, isn't it
great to get off the beaten path,
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416. get out where nature
really lives?
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417. None of that theme-park stuff
here, know what I mean?
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418. Come on, Ernest.
You're gonna get us lost.
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419. Well, we were lost
for weeks in Nam.
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420. I was under fire,
my body riddled with shrapnel,
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421. malaria, mono...
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422. wet socks.
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423. So... how do we get out
of here?
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424. Yeah, we were... we were
rough, tough, and hard to bluff.
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425. Men of iron,
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426. men who had never
tasted quiche.
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427. Really?
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428. Well, you couldn't even
get quiche in nam.
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429. Gosh, Ernest, I guess
you've done about everything.
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430. Some men try,
and some men die.
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431. Hey.
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432. He's waitin' on you.
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433. Mr. Blatz... Mr. Blatz?
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434. It looks like we're making
progress, sir.
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435. This sample is
over 20% petrocite.
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436. 20%. Well, this little expedition
may be worth something yet.
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437. Talk to me, George.
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438. Well, Mr. Blatz,
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439. I've been studying the results
of the exploratories,
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440. and the big hit is right here
at Kamp Kikakee.
Copy !req
441. Blatz here yet?
Copy !req
442. Did you get it?
Copy !req
443. No.
Copy !req
444. I couldn't get
the old Indian to budge.
Copy !req
445. Sherman, he might as
well be on another planet.
Copy !req
446. I don't want
your excuses.
Copy !req
447. I want results.
Copy !req
448. All right, Sherman,
I'll give it another try.
Copy !req
449. Do I have to remind you,
Mr. Blatz,
Copy !req
450. just how valuable petrocite
is to the space program
Copy !req
451. and every other defense
contractor in the world?
Copy !req
452. What we're
talking about here
Copy !req
453. is the largest deposit
ever found.
Copy !req
454. There are millions
at stake here...
Copy !req
455. so why don't you get your
tight, little lawyer's butt
Copy !req
456. over to the camp
and get me that lease?
Copy !req
457. Learning to make a fire
Copy !req
458. without matches and gasoline
is essential.
Copy !req
459. You need to know
the basic physics of friction.
Copy !req
460. It's a simple rule
of nature.
Copy !req
461. You know, you can make
a fire this way.
Copy !req
462. Boy, is it painful.
Copy !req
463. Ow!
Copy !req
464. Do you believe
this guy?
Copy !req
465. Boys, look!
Copy !req
466. A family of badgers.
Copy !req
467. Just as I promised you...
actual nature.
Copy !req
468. El Badgerus Maximus Ferocius
with young.
Copy !req
469. The young look just like
the regular badgers,
Copy !req
470. only smaller.
Copy !req
471. Now, here's a lesson
to be learned...
Copy !req
472. although they look cute
and cuddly,
Copy !req
473. don't ever, ever do this
to a family of badgers.
Copy !req
474. Aba daba daba daba
daba daba daba!
Copy !req
475. Aaaaah!
Copy !req
476. All right!
Time to practice first aid!
Copy !req
477. - Hey, yeah, let's go! Come on!
- Yeah!
Copy !req
478. This is a real
nice field dressing, fellas,
Copy !req
479. but I can't breathe.
Copy !req
480. W-What's that, Ernest?
I-I can't hear you.
Copy !req
481. You've got gauze
in your mouth.
Copy !req
482. I said I can't breathe!
Copy !req
483. Get me out of here, fast!
Copy !req
484. D-Did you say fast?
Copy !req
485. Uh-huh.
Copy !req
486. - Uh-huh.
Copy !req
487. Okay, no... no problem.
Copy !req
488. We'll have you
out of there in a jiffy.
Copy !req
489. Just stick tight.
We'll be out of there.
Copy !req
490. Just hold on.
Copy !req
491. Mnh! Mnh!
Copy !req
492. Mnh! Mnh!
Copy !req
493. Ahhh.
Copy !req
494. What happened?
Copy !req
495. Uh, Ernest was teaching us
first aid.
Copy !req
496. Well... at least
nobody was hurt.
Copy !req
497. Look, Miss St. Cloud,
how can I convince you here?
Copy !req
498. This is the chance of a lifetime
for you and your grandfather.
Copy !req
499. Now, he will receive 5%...
5% royalty, chief...
Copy !req
500. on every ounce of petrocite
Copy !req
501. that Krader Mining
pulls from the ground.
Copy !req
502. Now, we're talking
a lot of money here...
Copy !req
503. well over a million dollars
in just the first year.
Copy !req
504. All right,
I'll try again...
Copy !req
505. Thank you.
Copy !req
506. But I know my grandfather.
Copy !req
507. You will have great wealth
Copy !req
508. if you let these men
own the land.
Copy !req
509. He says,
"Who can own a tree?
Copy !req
510. "Who can own a rock?
Copy !req
511. Only the great spirit. "
Copy !req
512. Mr. Blatz,
this camp is here
Copy !req
513. because these were
ancient ceremonial grounds.
Copy !req
514. My grandfather and I are
the last members of our tribe.
Copy !req
515. This is part
of a sacred trust.
Copy !req
516. My grandfather thinks
of those boys as young braves
Copy !req
517. who keep alive the tradition
of our ancestors.
Copy !req
518. I'm sorry to hear that,
Miss St. Cloud...
Copy !req
519. but have a nice day.
Copy !req
520. Hey, Bobby Wayne,
let's see that.
Copy !req
521. Now, that is a real beauty.
Copy !req
522. Let your old buddy Ernest
Copy !req
523. show you how to put
a razor edge on that dog.
Copy !req
524. How 'bout it?
Copy !req
525. First, you wet the stone.
Copy !req
526. Ech!
Copy !req
527. That's the hard part.
Copy !req
528. Then you hold the knife
at a perfect 45-degree angle
Copy !req
529. and run it briskly
down the stone...
Copy !req
530. And through the meat
of the hand.
Copy !req
531. There you go, razor sharp.
Copy !req
532. Ah heh heh heh heh.
Copy !req
533. Is that a rabbit
over there?
Copy !req
534. Owwww.
Copy !req
535. - First aid?
- First aid.
Copy !req
536. Eddie, the way I've got
this figured is...
Copy !req
537. the new liver-loaf
lunch arranger
Copy !req
538. can feed the entire camp
in... in two minutes.
Copy !req
539. L-It slices, it dices,
it juliennes...
Copy !req
540. and it teaches respect!
Copy !req
541. Yes, Jake, the liver-loaf
lunch arranger
Copy !req
542. has taken us
one step closer
Copy !req
543. to the elusive
eggs erroneous.
Copy !req
544. Ready, Eddie?
Copy !req
545. Lobster bisque!
Copy !req
546. Lobster bisque, here!
Ready, ready!
Copy !req
547. No, no,
not the lobster bisque!
Copy !req
548. Oh, you don't want
to go in the liver-loaf arranger?
Copy !req
549. No!
Copy !req
550. Okay,
I won't put you in there then.
Copy !req
551. Get outta here! You and
your sappy friend, too.
Copy !req
552. No, no!
Copy !req
553. Ah ha ha ha ha
ha ha ha ha!
Copy !req
554. I love crustaceans, Jake.
Put him in.
Copy !req
555. All right, got it, Jake.
Got it.
Copy !req
556. Elevate, elevate!
Copy !req
557. Pretty good, Jake.
Copy !req
558. Chicken potpie!
Copy !req
559. Chicken...
Copy !req
560. Pot...
Copy !req
561. Pie!
Copy !req
562. Chicken potpie, Jake.
Copy !req
563. Comin' your way, Eddie!
Rockin' fire!
Copy !req
564. Shoot it, baby!
Shoot it!
Copy !req
565. Ah ha ha!
Copy !req
566. I want you to go long
this time, Eddie.
Copy !req
567. Ready, Jake!
Copy !req
568. And now for
Fettuccine Alfredo.
Copy !req
569. Fettuccine Alfredo, Jake.
Copy !req
570. First, the fettuccine...
Copy !req
571. And then a little Italian
named Fredo.
Copy !req
572. No, màmma mia!
Copy !req
573. Not in the liver-loaf
arranger!
Copy !req
574. Of course in there.
Copy !req
575. Let 'er rip, Jake.
Copy !req
576. All right! Yeah!
Copy !req
577. Ech!
Copy !req
578. Uhh!
Copy !req
579. Aah!
Copy !req
580. Ah heh heh heh
heh heh heh.
Copy !req
581. Owwwww!
Copy !req
582. Ugh!
Copy !req
583. - Oww!
Copy !req
584. It's all right.
Copy !req
585. Yeah,
it's okay here...
Copy !req
586. compared to
the institute.
Copy !req
587. Yeah. I sort of like
actual nature.
Copy !req
588. Full boat...
ladies and cowboys.
Copy !req
589. Aw, man!
Copy !req
590. That's it for me.
Copy !req
591. What are y'all doin', huh?
Copy !req
592. Ahh, poker.
Copy !req
593. It looks like I'm gonna
have to teach you
Copy !req
594. a little lesson in gaming.
Copy !req
595. Put on the eggs, mama,
Copy !req
596. 'cause daddy's gonna bring home
the bacon, know what I mean?
Copy !req
597. Oh, sure, Ernest.
Hey, deal him in, Oz.
Copy !req
598. Come on over here,
good luck.
Copy !req
599. Yeah, I remember once
I was playing dollar ante
Copy !req
600. with a bunch of roughnecks
Copy !req
601. from down around
the oil fields of Delacroix.
Copy !req
602. We were playing
5-card Mexican Gorilla Sweat,
Copy !req
603. deuces and treses wild,
Copy !req
604. and, boys, I was catching cards
like I had 12 fingers,
Copy !req
605. know what I mean?
Copy !req
606. I get paid on Fridays.
Copy !req
607. I could let you have
$30 a week.
Copy !req
608. That means I'd be paid up
in 14 years...
Copy !req
609. and a couple of months.
Copy !req
610. Ohh.
Copy !req
611. Site four's got to be
cleared tonight,
Copy !req
612. and they're still in there!
Copy !req
613. Listen to me! There are
such things as laws.
Copy !req
614. There are proper channels.
Copy !req
615. You can't just go into
somebody's house and take...
Copy !req
616. Hey...
Copy !req
617. What are you doing here?
Copy !req
618. They're still in there!
Copy !req
619. Sherman, can we not give
this family
Copy !req
620. just a little more time?
Copy !req
621. Do they have any
legal right to be there?
Copy !req
622. Technically... no.
Copy !req
623. Then get rid of them.
Copy !req
624. Thank you.
Copy !req
625. This house is the last thing
in our way.
Copy !req
626. I'll tell you, you ain't
gonna take our home.
Copy !req
627. I don't care
what the paper says.
Copy !req
628. No! No!
Copy !req
629. - Get outta here!
- I'm out!
Copy !req
630. Get out of here now!
Copy !req
631. Now, why don't you give me
some more of your excuses
Copy !req
632. as to why you don't have
that lease for Kamp Kikakee?
Copy !req
633. Boy, the guys
are gonna love this.
Copy !req
634. Am I a genius or what?
Copy !req
635. Heh heh heh heh heh.
Copy !req
636. Oh! Oh!
Copy !req
637. Oh! Oh, oh! Oh!
Copy !req
638. Ohh! No, no, No-o-o-o!
Copy !req
639. Oh! Oh!
Copy !req
640. Oh!
Copy !req
641. Aaah! Aaah!
Copy !req
642. Ah heh heh heh
heh heh heh.
Copy !req
643. Aaaaah!
Copy !req
644. Aah! Aah!
Copy !req
645. Aah! Aah! Aah! Aah!
Copy !req
646. Ow! Ooh!
Copy !req
647. Ahhh. Ahhh.
Copy !req
648. Uh!
Copy !req
649. Uh! Uh-uh-uh!
Copy !req
650. Men...
Copy !req
651. Before we begin
today's activities,
Copy !req
652. I want to remind you
Copy !req
653. that as a part of the path
of the brave,
Copy !req
654. each cabin will have a project.
Copy !req
655. That project should reflect
Copy !req
656. the proud tradition
of Kamp Kikakee.
Copy !req
657. - Wow. -
Wow. - Wow.
Copy !req
658. The winner of last year's
competition
Copy !req
659. made a full Indian
ceremonial headdress.
Copy !req
660. - So what? - So
what? - So what?
Copy !req
661. This year...
Copy !req
662. I hope that one of our group
will do even better.
Copy !req
663. Okay, fellas, let's get to it!
Copy !req
664. Okay, men, I want you to give
some special thought
Copy !req
665. to the competition
Mr. Tipton talked about.
Copy !req
666. Who knows? We might even
beat 'em at their own game.
Copy !req
667. Yeah, with a little teamwork,
Copy !req
668. with a little blood
and sweat and tears,
Copy !req
669. we might just win.
Copy !req
670. Oh, come on, even a flounder
takes sides.
Copy !req
671. Anybody got any ideas?
Copy !req
672. We could quit 'cause
we don't have a chance.
Copy !req
673. Quit?
Copy !req
674. Well, you know they ain't
gonna let us win anything.
Copy !req
675. They don't even
want us to be here.
Copy !req
676. Let's move out!
Everybody to the archery range!
Copy !req
677. Come on, fellas,
we got to at least try.
Copy !req
678. I know! We could build
an authentic Indian tepee.
Copy !req
679. You know, we could cut
some tall poles,
Copy !req
680. and we could get some paint
and some special lashings and...
Copy !req
681. Ernest, if you really want to
build a tepee, I'll help you.
Copy !req
682. Move it, short stuff!
We're waiting!
Copy !req
683. 21 degrees northwest
by 7 degrees southeast...
Copy !req
684. divided by 6,
carry the one.
Copy !req
685. Miss St.
Oh, hi, Ernest.
Copy !req
686. Oh, hi, Nurse St. Cloud.
Copy !req
687. Are you lost again?
Copy !req
688. Oh, no, no, no.
The woods are my home.
Copy !req
689. Yes, I have
a working knowledge
Copy !req
690. of every square inch
of this camp.
Copy !req
691. I am at one with nature.
Copy !req
692. Yeah, it's all
right here...
Copy !req
693. a keen sense of direction
Copy !req
694. and a firm grasp on the throttle
that controls the elements.
Copy !req
695. Here. Have something
to eat.
Copy !req
696. Thank you. Ahh!
Copy !req
697. Peanut butter
on white bread...
Copy !req
698. my favorite
rustic outdoor food.
Copy !req
699. Ah, this is the life...
the great outdoors,
Copy !req
700. a beautiful woman,
plenty of food,
Copy !req
701. and fire ants.
Copy !req
702. Fire ants?
Copy !req
703. Ahhh!
Copy !req
704. Owwww!
Copy !req
705. Ow! Ow!
Ow! Ow! Ow!
Copy !req
706. Shh! Whatever you do,
keep a straight face.
Copy !req
707. Ernest, the boys
are here to see you.
Copy !req
708. Hey, Ernest!
You okay?
Copy !req
709. We heard about
the army of fire ants.
Copy !req
710. Yeah, we brought you
a cheer-up present. Here.
Copy !req
711. Ah! Thanks, fellas.
Copy !req
712. You know, whatever they may say
about you, I'm gonna say, "Hey,
Copy !req
713. "you're talking about
my guys," know what I mean?
Copy !req
714. Go ahead, smell them,
Ernest. They're good.
Copy !req
715. Mmm.
Copy !req
716. Notice
their aromatic bouquet.
Copy !req
717. This is swell.
Copy !req
718. This is the best get-well present
I ever had, know what I mean?
Copy !req
719. Well, we'll see you,
Ernest.
Copy !req
720. Yeah, man,
we'll be seeing you.
Copy !req
721. - Catch you later.
- Bouquet!
Copy !req
722. Well, thanks, fellas.
Copy !req
723. Oh, man!
Copy !req
724. Those kids are really great,
aren't they?
Copy !req
725. That's what
they brought you?
Copy !req
726. It's a get-well present
from the boys.
Copy !req
727. That's poison ivy, Ernest,
Copy !req
728. and with that much
coverage,
Copy !req
729. you're gonna need
another shot.
Copy !req
730. Not again!
Copy !req
731. Gosh!
Copy !req
732. He was hugging it
and everything.
Copy !req
733. He said it was his best
get-well present.
Copy !req
734. Boys...
Copy !req
735. I'm really disappointed
in you.
Copy !req
736. That wasn't very nice.
Copy !req
737. I was just a joke.
Copy !req
738. Yeah, besides,
he's a jerk.
Copy !req
739. Y-Yeah, well, we didn't mean
to do anything or...
Copy !req
740. Yeah, we
didn't mean nothing by it.
Copy !req
741. Okay, okay,
you're right.
Copy !req
742. It seems like the harder I try,
the worse things get.
Copy !req
743. I like the boys, but I don't
think they like me.
Copy !req
744. Mr. Tipton's
chewed me out twice.
Copy !req
745. I guess I had it coming,
but it's still no fun,
Copy !req
746. know what I mean?
Copy !req
747. This counselor business
is harder than I thought,
Copy !req
748. but it's what I want to do.
Copy !req
749. Come on, Pokey, I need
to talk to somebody.
Copy !req
750. I know you're dormant
and coldblooded
Copy !req
751. and all that, but...
Copy !req
752. Ow!
Copy !req
753. Ow! Pokey!
Copy !req
754. Ow! You heartless beast!
Copy !req
755. Ow! Ow!
Copy !req
756. Pokey, Pokey, my sinuses!
Copy !req
757. Pokey! Oh! You said
you'd never do this again!
Copy !req
758. Ow! Ow!
Copy !req
759. Heh heh heh
heh heh heh.
Copy !req
760. Hey, Ernest!
Copy !req
761. You got a turtle
on your nose, man!
Copy !req
762. Oh, no, no, i-it's a zit.
Copy !req
763. It comes back
every now and then. Heh heh.
Copy !req
764. Hey, come on, fellas, we can jerk
that sucker off there in just a second.
Copy !req
765. No! No, no!
Copy !req
766. The only way to get him off
is to sing him to sleep!
Copy !req
767. Okay, guys, come on.
Okay.
Copy !req
768. A-one, A-two,
A-one, two, three.
Copy !req
769. What's going on?
Copy !req
770. Well, look who's here.
It's the last-chance boys.
Copy !req
771. How you doin', guys?
Copy !req
772. They let you guys
run around loose?
Copy !req
773. What are you makin'?
Copy !req
774. It looks like a skeleton
or something.
Copy !req
775. It's a kayak, airhead,
Copy !req
776. and this baby's gonna win
the competition
Copy !req
777. again for us
this year, pal.
Copy !req
778. What are you guys
making?
Copy !req
779. None of your business.
Copy !req
780. Oh, a secret
project, huh?
Copy !req
781. I wonder
what that could be.
Copy !req
782. I bet they don't have
anything.
Copy !req
783. - We do too!
- Oh, sure you do.
Copy !req
784. Hey, you don't know nothing about nothing,
blondie, and I know that for a fact.
Copy !req
785. Yeah, you'll see it
soon enough!
Copy !req
786. - Yeah, when we win.
- Ooh, I'm real scared.
Copy !req
787. That's it, man. Come on,
push me, punk! Come on!
Copy !req
788. I'll have you
singing soprano!
Copy !req
789. - Shut up!
- Come on, Vargas.
Copy !req
790. - Don't tempt me.
- Come on, man.
Copy !req
791. They don't have anything.
Copy !req
792. Boy, what a bunch
of losers.
Copy !req
793. - Whoo-hoo!
- Yeah!
Copy !req
794. You know, Moose,
Copy !req
795. recreating your genuine
Indian artifact
Copy !req
796. is not just another
handicraft. It is a art.
Copy !req
797. - Ernest?
- Mm-hmm?
Copy !req
798. Do you think
if we win this contest,
Copy !req
799. we could stay here forever
Copy !req
800. and not have to go back
to that old institute?
Copy !req
801. Well, if it was
up to me, Moose,
Copy !req
802. you'd stay right here
from now on.
Copy !req
803. Is it up to you?
Copy !req
804. No.
Copy !req
805. I didn't think so.
Copy !req
806. Well, it's no use talking
to the old Indian.
Copy !req
807. I mean, the old guy
can't stop talking
Copy !req
808. about the old ways...
Copy !req
809. spirits, this kind of
voodoo mumbo jumbo.
Copy !req
810. Sherman,
you don't understand.
Copy !req
811. The old guy will not
listen to reason.
Copy !req
812. I mean,
who can own a tree?
Copy !req
813. What?
Copy !req
814. Nothing.
Copy !req
815. You just haven't tried
hard enough.
Copy !req
816. Money talks!
Copy !req
817. Sherman, we could be
on very shaky ground here.
Copy !req
818. There's the old treaty...
Copy !req
819. This is the real world!
We're playing hardball!
Copy !req
820. You just can't be
soft and polite
Copy !req
821. and expect things
to come your way!
Copy !req
822. I got too much
riding on this...
Copy !req
823. and I'm not gonna let
some old Indian
Copy !req
824. throw a monkey wrench
into it.
Copy !req
825. Hey, hand me that string
over there, will you?
Copy !req
826. Okay.
Copy !req
827. Yeah, the inside's really
starting to look nice.
Copy !req
828. These boys have really jumped into
this competition with both feet.
Copy !req
829. They just needed something
to be proud of.
Copy !req
830. Hey, Crutch, next time
I run away from the institute,
Copy !req
831. I'm gonna build myself
one of these things.
Copy !req
832. Hey, dudes,
check it out.
Copy !req
833. Now, that's
no slouch job.
Copy !req
834. Hey, you know, we just
might win this thing.
Copy !req
835. You know, I think
I might have a knack
Copy !req
836. for this
construction biz.
Copy !req
837. Somebody
give me a hand.
Copy !req
838. Hey,
I'll help you out.
Copy !req
839. And then he thought
he heard it,
Copy !req
840. and that's when Vernon
turned around
Copy !req
841. and looked in his rear window,
Copy !req
842. and there,
staring back at him,
Copy !req
843. was the Hook Man!
Copy !req
844. Ah ha ha ha ha ha
ha ha ha ha!
Copy !req
845. So, he stomped on the gas,
and he tore outta there!
Copy !req
846. And the next day, Vernon
went out to get in his car,
Copy !req
847. and there, hanging
on the rearview mirror,
Copy !req
848. was the hook!
Copy !req
849. I thought it was supposed
to be on the door handle.
Copy !req
850. - Ha ha.
- Yeah.
Copy !req
851. Yeah, it was originally,
Copy !req
852. but, uh, but then Vernon hung it
on the rearview mirror,
Copy !req
853. you know, like a souvenir,
like dice and baby shoes.
Copy !req
854. Uh-huh.
Copy !req
855. Ah heh. Well, does anybody else,
uh, have an interesting story?
Copy !req
856. Uh, chief, uh, can you
tell us a big story?
Copy !req
857. Heh heh heh.
Copy !req
858. I speak
to the young braves
Copy !req
859. so that they may know
of the old ways.
Copy !req
860. I speak to them
so that they may know
Copy !req
861. what this ground holds
of the spirits of the past.
Copy !req
862. When a young brave was ready
to become a warrior,
Copy !req
863. it was here
that he was called
Copy !req
864. by the wise men
and the elders.
Copy !req
865. If he had faith
in the great one,
Copy !req
866. the knife
would not cut him.
Copy !req
867. If he had courage,
true courage,
Copy !req
868. the rock
would not break him.
Copy !req
869. If the brave
was pure of heart,
Copy !req
870. the arrow
could not catch him.
Copy !req
871. And then he would become
a warrior,
Copy !req
872. as someday you will.
Copy !req
873. And that was called
Copy !req
874. the ceremony of the blade,
the stone, and the arrow.
Copy !req
875. Like in our culture...
paper, rock, scissors.
Copy !req
876. Man, that sure was some rap
the old chief was putting on us.
Copy !req
877. Yeah, I wonder
if that stuff is true.
Copy !req
878. Well, you wouldn't catch me
standing around
Copy !req
879. letting some lunatic
throw knives at me.
Copy !req
880. Whap!
Copy !req
881. Oh, no!
That's our tepee!
Copy !req
882. Who did this?
Copy !req
883. Who do you think?
Copy !req
884. Man, let's get 'em!
Copy !req
885. Yeah, come on!
Copy !req
886. Looks like you fellas
forgot something here.
Copy !req
887. We wouldn't
want you to get thirsty,
Copy !req
888. now, would we, fellas?
Copy !req
889. So we come to repay
the favor.
Copy !req
890. Mr. Your boys
are out of control.
Copy !req
891. I mean, this last fight,
it was the last straw.
Copy !req
892. I've got other campers
I've got to think about here.
Copy !req
893. I think it's best
for all concerned
Copy !req
894. if we just send them all
back to the institution,
Copy !req
895. where they can get
the supervision they need.
Copy !req
896. Don't do it, sir.
Copy !req
897. Ernest, it's not really
your fault. It's my fault.
Copy !req
898. I thought you could do it.
I was wrong.
Copy !req
899. But it's not fair
to send them back.
Copy !req
900. It's not their fault.
Maybe I was a bad counselor.
Copy !req
901. They shouldn't have to
suffer for that.
Copy !req
902. Look, if you give the
second-chance boys another chance
Copy !req
903. and me another chance,
that'll be three chances,
Copy !req
904. and added to the two chances
we had before, that makes...
Copy !req
905. five or six chances...
carry the one...
Copy !req
906. Okay, Ernest,
one more chance.
Copy !req
907. I'll let the boys stay,
Copy !req
908. but they better
get with the program...
Copy !req
909. you know what I mean?
Copy !req
910. Oh, I know what you mean.
Yes, sir. Thank you.
Copy !req
911. Thank you.
Copy !req
912. They were all set
Copy !req
913. to send you boys
back to the institute,
Copy !req
914. when you-know-who stepped in
and saved the day.
Copy !req
915. See? I told you
he wasn't such a dork.
Copy !req
916. But they burned it,
Ernest.
Copy !req
917. One monkey
don't stop no show.
Copy !req
918. We can still win
this thing.
Copy !req
919. Aw, come on, Ernest,
what's the point?
Copy !req
920. The point is
to do your best always,
Copy !req
921. to always give it
your best shot,
Copy !req
922. To boldly go
where no man has gone before.
Copy !req
923. It's the path of the brave.
Copy !req
924. Well, I don't know
about you guys,
Copy !req
925. but I'm not gonna let 'em
put me down.
Copy !req
926. I'm gonna build
this thing over.
Copy !req
927. Hey, yeah, guys,
he's right.
Copy !req
928. Come on, let's go.
Copy !req
929. Ernest,
it's a lead-pipe city.
Copy !req
930. Yeah.
Copy !req
931. Mr. Wind Cloud...
Copy !req
932. Ah, this looks like
a museum.
Copy !req
933. Ha ha ha! I can feel
the history here.
Copy !req
934. Mr. Wind Cloud,
I am Sherman Krader,
Copy !req
935. Krader Mining Corporation.
Copy !req
936. My attorney, Mr. Blatz, has
conveyed to you my very...
Copy !req
937. My attorney, Mr. Blatz,
Copy !req
938. has conveyed to you
my very generous offer
Copy !req
939. to obtain a lease on
a portion of land that you,
Copy !req
940. as one of the last members
of your tribe, control.
Copy !req
941. I'll... and I'm here
to double that offer.
Copy !req
942. I know it's not
very fair to me,
Copy !req
943. but, um, I realize
there's a lot
Copy !req
944. of sentimental
attachment here,
Copy !req
945. and I'm prepared
to offer you
Copy !req
946. a 10% royalty
on all the petrocite
Copy !req
947. that we can mine out of
the Kikakee area... 10%!
Copy !req
948. Mr. Wind Cloud...
Copy !req
949. Mr. Wind Cloud,
I don't think you understand.
Copy !req
950. Now, you'd be a fool
not to sign this paper.
Copy !req
951. Mr. Wind Cloud,
you have to sign this paper!
Copy !req
952. It's your patriotic duty!
Copy !req
953. Do you understand
a word I've been saying?
Copy !req
954. Uh, chief...
Copy !req
955. your canoe
is in the river.
Copy !req
956. Oh, I'm sorry.
Copy !req
957. I didn't know
you had company.
Copy !req
958. Excuse me.
Copy !req
959. I'm, uh, Bob Wilson...
maybe you could help me...
Copy !req
960. Department of, uh, Soils
and Water Conservation.
Copy !req
961. Um, I'm having a little
problem communicating
Copy !req
962. with, uh,
Mr. Wind Cloud here.
Copy !req
963. You see, there's a... there's,
um, a strip-mining company
Copy !req
964. on the upper part
of the river.
Copy !req
965. I'm getting
all the landowners here
Copy !req
966. to sign this petition
to stop their activities
Copy !req
967. before they completely
ruin the river.
Copy !req
968. Now, maybe you can
"talk" to him.
Copy !req
969. Ha ha ha.
Copy !req
970. And get him
to sign this.
Copy !req
971. Communicating with your
Native-American cultures
Copy !req
972. is a specialty of mine.
Copy !req
973. I'm bilingual.
Copy !req
974. It's a difficult skill,
Copy !req
975. but one which I acquired
after years of study.
Copy !req
976. Mister, you have come
to the right man.
Copy !req
977. No problemo.
Comprendo, déjà vu?
Copy !req
978. Yes, I do. Yeah.
Thank you.
Copy !req
979. This is a sad day
for Kamp Kikakee.
Copy !req
980. I've got here a signed order
Copy !req
981. that says
the camp's got to close.
Copy !req
982. Oh, man.
Copy !req
983. What?
Copy !req
984. I'm sorry, fellas.
Copy !req
985. We're gonna have to pack
and leave.
Copy !req
986. What's happened?
Copy !req
987. This doesn't make
any sense.
Copy !req
988. The chief has signed away
control of the land
Copy !req
989. to Krader Mining Company.
Copy !req
990. Krader takes over
the day after tomorrow.
Copy !req
991. They're gonna move in
their heavy equipment,
Copy !req
992. and they are going to destroy
everything around here
Copy !req
993. looking for some mineral.
Copy !req
994. I'm sorry, guys.
Copy !req
995. I'm sorry this happened.
Copy !req
996. Somebody had to...
Copy !req
997. fast-talk the chief
into signing.
Copy !req
998. Ohhh.
Copy !req
999. Uh.
Copy !req
1000. Okay, guys, let's get packed up.
We got to get out of here.
Copy !req
1001. There are only
two people here
Copy !req
1002. who can communicate
with grandfather.
Copy !req
1003. L-It's all a great big
misunderstanding.
Copy !req
1004. I'll fix it up,
know what I mean?
Copy !req
1005. I'll fix it.
You'll see.
Copy !req
1006. Man, this is such
a major bummer.
Copy !req
1007. What are we gonna do?
Copy !req
1008. Go back to the institution. What else?
Copy !req
1009. I was gettin'
to like it here.
Copy !req
1010. Hey, I ain't goin' back
to no institution.
Copy !req
1011. - Me neither.
- No way.
Copy !req
1012. Nobody's gonna have to
go anywhere.
Copy !req
1013. I knew you'd think
of something, Ernest.
Copy !req
1014. You've got a plan?
Copy !req
1015. Yep. I'm gonna settle this
lease thing once and for all.
Copy !req
1016. Yeah,
settle it, Ernest.
Copy !req
1017. Yeah,
this I want to see.
Copy !req
1018. Course, I might have to
jack a few jaws,
Copy !req
1019. pass out a couple
of knuckle sandwiches.
Copy !req
1020. All right!
Now you're talking!
Copy !req
1021. - Come on, fellas. Let's watch the man work.
- Yeah.
Copy !req
1022. See these hands, huh?
Huh? Huh? You see 'em?
Copy !req
1023. If I put these hands
in my pockets,
Copy !req
1024. I will be arrested for carrying
concealed deadly weapons,
Copy !req
1025. know what I mean?
Copy !req
1026. - Whoa! -
Whoa! - Whoa!
Copy !req
1027. - Yeah!
- Yeah!
Copy !req
1028. Go! Whoo!
Copy !req
1029. I want to talk to the punk
Copy !req
1030. who is responsible for
the actions of this company.
Copy !req
1031. Now!
Copy !req
1032. Ah heh. Ohhh.
Copy !req
1033. Ah heh heh heh heh.
Copy !req
1034. Ohh.
Copy !req
1035. Ah heh heh heh heh
heh heh heh.
Copy !req
1036. Come on, Ernest.
Copy !req
1037. Destroy
the evil vigilance!
Copy !req
1038. Come on, Ernest!
Copy !req
1039. You got him! You got him!
He's not that big.
Copy !req
1040. Jack his jaw, Ernest.
Copy !req
1041. Yeah!
Turn out his lights!
Copy !req
1042. Oh, I don't know.
Copy !req
1043. I-I think his jaw
looks pretty well jacked.
Copy !req
1044. Real nice.
Ah heh heh heh heh.
Copy !req
1045. Nice hat, too.
Heh heh heh heh.
Copy !req
1046. Uhh!
Copy !req
1047. Come on, Ernest!
Get up!
Copy !req
1048. - Come on! Come on!
- Let's go, man!
Copy !req
1049. If he comes over here
and bothers us again,
Copy !req
1050. I'm gonna give him one
of these over here
Copy !req
1051. and one of those
over there.
Copy !req
1052. - Ha ha ha ha!
Copy !req
1053. What are you doing?
Copy !req
1054. Hey!
Copy !req
1055. Ha ha ha ha!
Copy !req
1056. No! Let me go!
Copy !req
1057. Aaahh!
Copy !req
1058. - Moose, get back here!
- Aw, man!
Copy !req
1059. All right, come on,
Ernest! Get up!
Copy !req
1060. You okay, son?
Copy !req
1061. You can do it!
Copy !req
1062. Come on!
Copy !req
1063. Uh!
Copy !req
1064. Uh!
Copy !req
1065. Ha ha!
Copy !req
1066. Get up, man!
Get up!
Copy !req
1067. Get off the ground, man.
Copy !req
1068. Ha ha ha ha!
Copy !req
1069. Uh.
Copy !req
1070. Ohh!
Copy !req
1071. He's all over with.
Copy !req
1072. Ha ha ha ha!
Copy !req
1073. Give me a hand
over here, bud.
Copy !req
1074. Let's get this laid out.
Copy !req
1075. I guess there ain't much
to Ernest.
Copy !req
1076. Yeah, he ain't nothin'.
Copy !req
1077. Jack his jaw, Ernest.
Copy !req
1078. That's a bunch of bull.
Copy !req
1079. I believe in you, Ernest.
Copy !req
1080. But there's just some things
you can't do nothin' about.
Copy !req
1081. I had the first two
or three of them
Copy !req
1082. right where I wanted 'em.
Copy !req
1083. And then the others
jumped me.
Copy !req
1084. That was a brave thing
you did, Ernest.
Copy !req
1085. Almost makes up for the dumb
thing you did with granddad.
Copy !req
1086. I wish
I could have been there.
Copy !req
1087. It wasn't a place
for women.
Copy !req
1088. The damage done there tonight
was not a pretty sight.
Copy !req
1089. Ernest
"The Hammer" Worrell,
Copy !req
1090. warrior of the sacred land
of our fathers...
Copy !req
1091. or your fathers.
Copy !req
1092. I could have...
I had them...
Copy !req
1093. This place...
and these kids...
Copy !req
1094. It's everything to me.
Copy !req
1095. I was a counselor.
Copy !req
1096. I had everything.
Copy !req
1097. And now it's all gone.
Copy !req
1098. What are you boys
doing here?
Copy !req
1099. You should have gone
with the others.
Copy !req
1100. We ain't going back.
Copy !req
1101. You can't stay here.
Copy !req
1102. They're going to wipe out
this whole area soon.
Copy !req
1103. Where's Ernest?
Copy !req
1104. Probably packing
his stuff.
Copy !req
1105. He's dumber than a bucket full
of hair, ain't he?
Copy !req
1106. You know what dumb is?
Copy !req
1107. Dumb is not knowing
who your friends are.
Copy !req
1108. Ernest is the only person
in the world
Copy !req
1109. who cared about you.
Copy !req
1110. He tried to help you.
Copy !req
1111. He stood up for you
Copy !req
1112. when nobody else in the world
even wanted to know you.
Copy !req
1113. Ernest is losing everything
he cares about...
Copy !req
1114. his home, his job,
everything.
Copy !req
1115. And all you can think about
is what you want.
Copy !req
1116. Tsk.
Copy !req
1117. You're not gonna leave,
are you, Ernest?
Copy !req
1118. Yeah.
No more Counselor Ernest.
Copy !req
1119. No more shaping and molding
young minds
Copy !req
1120. into a focused worldview.
Copy !req
1121. No more Kamp Kikakee.
Copy !req
1122. Ernest, uh,
we've been thinking.
Copy !req
1123. Yeah.
Copy !req
1124. We ain't got much of a chance,
but we got a plan.
Copy !req
1125. If we stop those miners,
Copy !req
1126. then there will be
a Kamp Kikakee.
Copy !req
1127. Boys, we can't stop
those miners.
Copy !req
1128. Look what they did to me,
Copy !req
1129. and that was just one
of 'em.
Copy !req
1130. Come on, Ernest.
Copy !req
1131. That don't sound like
no path of the brave to me.
Copy !req
1132. I don't wanna go back
to no institution.
Copy !req
1133. I wanna stay right
here with you.
Copy !req
1134. Yeah, me too.
Copy !req
1135. We all do, Ernest.
Copy !req
1136. Yeah, come on, Ernest.
Copy !req
1137. Come on.
We can get 'em.
Copy !req
1138. Hey, it's the path
of the brave.
Copy !req
1139. Come on.
We can get 'em.
Copy !req
1140. Let's go for it.
Copy !req
1141. We can do it, Ernest.
Copy !req
1142. You know what I think?
Copy !req
1143. I think we might just
could beat 'em.
Copy !req
1144. - All right! - All
right! - All right!
Copy !req
1145. And run 'em off this land.
Copy !req
1146. - Yeah! -
Yeah! - Yeah!
Copy !req
1147. Yeah. I think we might
just get a little bit rowdy.
Copy !req
1148. And it might be an ugly
thing to watch.
Copy !req
1149. - Whoa!
- Yeah!
Copy !req
1150. We got a plan?
Copy !req
1151. - Yeah!
- Yeah!
Copy !req
1152. Me for you!
Copy !req
1153. - And you for me!
- And you for me!
Copy !req
1154. Yeah! Let's go!
Copy !req
1155. - All right! All right!
Whoo-hoo!
Copy !req
1156. Yeah, we're gonna
get those guys!
Copy !req
1157. - Yeah!
- We're gonna kill 'em.
Copy !req
1158. Oh, yeah.
Copy !req
1159. We are out of hydraulics.
Copy !req
1160. Hey, look,
it's Ken and Barbie.
Copy !req
1161. What are you jerks
doin' here?
Copy !req
1162. I thought you ran away
with the others.
Copy !req
1163. I think they missed us.
Copy !req
1164. We wouldn't want you guys to
have to get in a fight without us.
Copy !req
1165. Come on.
Copy !req
1166. Eddie, that's...
that's enough.
Copy !req
1167. Come on, Eddie.
Copy !req
1168. Jake, ammo.
Copy !req
1169. Fix this linguini...
Copy !req
1170. With broken clam shells.
Copy !req
1171. Good.
Copy !req
1172. Grandfather...
you can't do this!
Copy !req
1173. These are children!
Copy !req
1174. Ernest, are you crazy?
Those are grown men out there.
Copy !req
1175. You don't stand a chance.
Copy !req
1176. They ain't gonna get
this camp.
Copy !req
1177. We can't win this fight
without legal help.
Copy !req
1178. They ain't gonna get
this camp.
Copy !req
1179. Okay.
Bobby Wayne, Crutchfield,
Copy !req
1180. you go this way
with the multibow.
Copy !req
1181. Check.
Copy !req
1182. Vargas, Danny,
you take the split.
Copy !req
1183. Moose, you come with me
to the lantern launcher.
Copy !req
1184. Ready.
Copy !req
1185. - What's goin' on here?
Copy !req
1186. Fire!
Copy !req
1187. - Whoa!
- Fire!
Copy !req
1188. Wuh! Oh!
Copy !req
1189. Oh!
Copy !req
1190. Ha ha ha ha!
Ah ha ha ha!
Copy !req
1191. Ha ha! Ha ha!
Copy !req
1192. - Ow!
Copy !req
1193. - Ohh!
Copy !req
1194. - Ohh!
Copy !req
1195. Uh!
Copy !req
1196. Hey!
Copy !req
1197. All right.
Copy !req
1198. Okay, men, battle stations.
Copy !req
1199. Ozgood, man the controls.
Crutchfield, crow's-nest.
Copy !req
1200. Bobby Wayne, look,
upstairs.
Copy !req
1201. Danny, Vargas,
you operate the crane.
Copy !req
1202. 300 yards, 20 degrees
to the right!
Copy !req
1203. Where we got it!
It's ready!
Copy !req
1204. Ready?
Copy !req
1205. 228 by 6.6.
Copy !req
1206. Now.
Copy !req
1207. - Whoa! -
Whoa! - Whoa!
Copy !req
1208. - Yeah! -
Yeah! - Yeah!
Copy !req
1209. Bring me the graham cracker
bouillabaisse.
Copy !req
1210. Graham cracker.
Copy !req
1211. No, no, not me.
Copy !req
1212. Oh, yeah, you.
Copy !req
1213. Me too?
Copy !req
1214. Oh, yeah.
One more time.
Copy !req
1215. Ready. Ready.
Copy !req
1216. - Fire!
Copy !req
1217. Ahh!
Copy !req
1218. Ow!
Copy !req
1219. Ha ha ha!
Copy !req
1220. Pokey.
Copy !req
1221. You guys got your
little chutes packed.
Copy !req
1222. Death from above.
That's good.
Copy !req
1223. 216 by 121.
Copy !req
1224. I'm scared, sarge.
Copy !req
1225. We're all scared, son.
Copy !req
1226. Okay. Ready?
Copy !req
1227. Now.
Copy !req
1228. Airborne!
Copy !req
1229. Aahhh!
Copy !req
1230. Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah!
Copy !req
1231. Ah!
Copy !req
1232. Ah! No!
Copy !req
1233. Aaahhh!
Copy !req
1234. Yeah!
Copy !req
1235. Let's get outta here!
Copy !req
1236. Wait! Ahhhh!
Copy !req
1237. E-e-e-e-ew.
Copy !req
1238. Ready?
Copy !req
1239. It's ablaze!
Copy !req
1240. Now!
Copy !req
1241. Yay!
Copy !req
1242. Mr. Krader!
M-Mr. Krader, come in!
Copy !req
1243. What the hell's going on
down there?
Copy !req
1244. We're under attack!
Copy !req
1245. Attack?
Copy !req
1246. Turtle paratroopers
have taken out the whole crew.
Copy !req
1247. Turtle what?
Copy !req
1248. Mr. Krader, the whole camp's
a shambles!
Copy !req
1249. Those kids
and that counselor
Copy !req
1250. have set fire to every piece
of equipment we had!
Copy !req
1251. It's all burning!
Copy !req
1252. Okay. That did it.
Copy !req
1253. We'll start filing the papers
in the morning.
Copy !req
1254. What are you doing?
Copy !req
1255. I'm putting an end
to all this.
Copy !req
1256. Sherman,
you can't be serious.
Copy !req
1257. Shut up, Blatz.
Copy !req
1258. Sherman, you've carried this
way too far.
Copy !req
1259. Now, let's cut our losses
and seek legal satisfaction.
Copy !req
1260. This isn't business
any longer.
Copy !req
1261. This is personal!
Copy !req
1262. Sherman, you are crazy.
Copy !req
1263. Yes, sir!
Copy !req
1264. Okay. Come on, fellas.
Let's get outta here.
Copy !req
1265. Yeah! Let's get out!
Copy !req
1266. Let's get those guys!
Let's go!
Copy !req
1267. - Ahhhhhhh!
Copy !req
1268. Dozer, 2:00, Jake!
Copy !req
1269. We're gonna be
Jake and Eddie Tartare.
Copy !req
1270. Ahhhhh!
Copy !req
1271. Ha ha ha ha ha!
Copy !req
1272. Ahhhhh!
My thighs are on fire!
Copy !req
1273. Jake!
Copy !req
1274. Ahhhh!
Copy !req
1275. Serpentine!
Serpentine!
Copy !req
1276. Jake, they're
gonna crush us!
Copy !req
1277. Hey, Eddie,
turn it around.
Copy !req
1278. Let's give him
another balling.
Copy !req
1279. Turn it around by myself?
Jake, I need help.
Copy !req
1280. There's no time for help!
Copy !req
1281. We can't let it go,
Jake.
Copy !req
1282. Come on, Eddie.
Copy !req
1283. No!
Copy !req
1284. Come on!
Copy !req
1285. Oh, Jake.
Copy !req
1286. Hey! Hey!
Copy !req
1287. Ha ha ha ha ha!
Copy !req
1288. Ha ha ha ha ha!
Copy !req
1289. Ha ha ha ha!
Copy !req
1290. Hey, fellas, follow me.
I-I got an idea.
Copy !req
1291. Come on.
Copy !req
1292. Go! Go!
Copy !req
1293. So what do we do?
Copy !req
1294. Get anything
that'll burn.
Copy !req
1295. Let's go!
Copy !req
1296. Man, this ain't enough.
Copy !req
1297. We still don't have
a chance!
Copy !req
1298. Stand back!
Copy !req
1299. I got it!
I got it!
Copy !req
1300. The most powerful
substance known to man...
Copy !req
1301. eggs erroneous,
experimental series 106.
Copy !req
1302. Light it, Pennington.
Copy !req
1303. What are you doin', man?
What are you doin', Ernest?
Copy !req
1304. After the break,
know what I mean?
Copy !req
1305. Let him go, man!
It's our only chance!
Copy !req
1306. - Yeah! -
Yeah! - Yeah!
Copy !req
1307. Heh heh heh heh.
Copy !req
1308. That's it.
Copy !req
1309. It's over.
Copy !req
1310. Dead meat. Deep six.
Copy !req
1311. The groundhogs are bringing
their mail.
Copy !req
1312. He's got a gun!
Copy !req
1313. Hurry up, you guys.
Copy !req
1314. Come on.
Copy !req
1315. Look out, Ernest!
Get outta the way!
Copy !req
1316. Miss St. If he had faith
in the great one,
Copy !req
1317. the knife would not cut him.
Copy !req
1318. He missed.
I can't believe he missed.
Copy !req
1319. Miss St. If he had courage, true
courage, the rock would not break him.
Copy !req
1320. Heh heh heh heh.
Copy !req
1321. Heh heh heh
heh heh heh.
Copy !req
1322. Miss St. If the brave was pure
of heart, the arrow could not catch him.
Copy !req
1323. Heh heh heh
heh heh heh heh.
Copy !req
1324. Paper, rock, scissors.
Heh heh.
Copy !req
1325. It looks like this one's
out of your hands, Krader.
Copy !req
1326. Heh-heh heh-heh
heh heh.
Copy !req
1327. We got it!
We got it!
Copy !req
1328. The judge issued
a restraining order!
Copy !req
1329. Ernest...
Copy !req
1330. Guess what?
Copy !req
1331. Krader's attorney admitted that
they tricked my grandfather,
Copy !req
1332. so everything
is behind us now.
Copy !req
1333. Yep, and my boys don't have
to go back to the institute,
Copy !req
1334. and this camp has
a year-round counselor.
Copy !req
1335. I'm really proud
of you, Ernest.
Copy !req
1336. You did what nobody else
could have done.
Copy !req
1337. Yep, I guess I'm just
a take-charge kind of guy,
Copy !req
1338. a man of vision and of scopes,
know what I mean?
Copy !req
1339. Ah heh heh heh heh heh.
Copy !req
1340. Ah heh. Uh! Ah-ah!
Ah! Ahhhhhhh!
Copy !req
1341. Rope's a little loose.
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1342. Uh! Ahhhhhh!
Copy !req
1343. What happened?
Copy !req
1344. Well... at least
nobody was hurt.
Copy !req
1345. Consistency.
Copy !req
1346. The aroma...
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1347. I-I've done it.
Copy !req
1348. T-This is the quintessential
eggs erroneous.
Copy !req
1349. Someone's
gotta taste this.
Copy !req
1350. Eddie?
Copy !req
1351. Eddie, taste this.
Copy !req
1352. It's eggs erroneous.
It's perfect.
Copy !req
1353. It's what we've been
waiting for!
Copy !req
1354. Not me!
Copy !req
1355. Eddie!
Copy !req
1356. Try it.
Copy !req