1. The following story is based on actual events...Copy !req
2. DUDE, WHERE'S MY CAR?Copy !req
3. What's Up?Copy !req
4. Animal PlanetCopy !req
5. Man, I just had the craziest dream.Copy !req
6. About what?Copy !req
7. I don't remember.Copy !req
8. Morning guys.Copy !req
9. Morning Gene.Copy !req
10. What did we do last night?Copy !req
11. I don't know.Copy !req
12. Wait, didn't the twins have a party?Copy !req
13. Yeah! That's it. Twins had a party!Copy !req
14. Right!Copy !req
15. Were we there?Copy !req
16. I'm assuming we were. What kind of
boyfriends would we be if we weren't.Copy !req
17. Any messages?Copy !req
18. No.Copy !req
19. See you tomorrow Gene.Copy !req
20. Shibby.Copy !req
21. How do you know Gene?Copy !req
22. Oh, I thought he was your friend.Copy !req
23. No, no, I don't know him.Copy !req
24. I'm starving.Copy !req
25. It's... pudding.Copy !req
26. I always wondered what a fridge
full of pudding would look like.Copy !req
27. Is it possible that we got
so wasted last night,Copy !req
28. that we bought a lifetime supply of
pudding and then totally forgot about it?Copy !req
29. I'd say it's entirely possible.Copy !req
30. Jesse and Chester are shibby at the moment.
Please leave your shibby at the beep. Shibby.Copy !req
31. - What happened to you guys last night?Copy !req
32. - You showed with the bunch of people, pizzas and a cake...Copy !req
33. and now our house is trashed.Copy !req
34. - You guys are sucky boyfriends.
You're always disappointing us.Copy !req
35. - And now you're probably just sitting
there on the couch in your underwear...Copy !req
36. playing stupid thumbwars...Copy !req
37. wearing your ridiculous army helmets...Copy !req
38. and if you are you've
probably forgotten our anniversary...Copy !req
39. which is TODAY!Copy !req
40. That means you don't get the special
treats we had in store for you.Copy !req
41. We just wanted to call and thank
you guys for trashing our house.Copy !req
42. BYE!Copy !req
43. Twins are pissed dude.Copy !req
44. Good thing we already bought them gifts.Copy !req
45. So..., where are the gifts?Copy !req
46. - They must be in your car.
- Right! They're in the car. OK.Copy !req
47. So we'll just go and take the gifts
over to twins house and get our special treats.Copy !req
48. Hey! What do you think they mean by special treats?Copy !req
49. We've been going out with the twins for year now.Copy !req
50. And we still haven't had sex.Copy !req
51. Special treats is code for sex.Copy !req
52. Of course!Copy !req
53. Special treats!Copy !req
54. Sex!Copy !req
55. Open up you two shackals!Copy !req
56. It's Mr. PizzacoliCopy !req
57. You guys left work last night with 30 pizzas that
didn't get delivered and I want some answers!Copy !req
58. Open up this damn door!Copy !req
59. It's open!Copy !req
60. Moron!Copy !req
61. Hey. Mr. Pizzacoli! Hey, how are you doing?Copy !req
62. Thirty pizzas didn't get delivered last night.Copy !req
63. If I ever found out you were taking my
pizzas home for your own eating pleasure...Copy !req
64. I will crush you like a doodlebug!Copy !req
65. Look! It's an elephant.Copy !req
66. What?Copy !req
67. Just a mailman.Copy !req
68. You two are the most
irresponsible, not to mention...Copy !req
69. disappointing employees ever to work...Copy !req
70. at Mr. Pizzacoli Pronto Pizza Deliveries.Copy !req
71. Well, a trained dolphin
could do a better job than you.Copy !req
72. Well, sure but then the pizzas would get all wet.Copy !req
73. Look! A unicorn!Copy !req
74. A unicorn?Copy !req
75. Sorry, I guess it was just a regular horse. Weird.Copy !req
76. I know you've been embezzling
my pizza. And I will get you eventually.Copy !req
77. And when I do I swear to God...Copy !req
78. you will never deliver pizzas in this town again.Copy !req
79. Close one.Copy !req
80. Yeah.Copy !req
81. So, we'll go to the twins house,
we'll give them their anniversary gifts...Copy !req
82. and then we'll apologise for
trashing their house and then...Copy !req
83. we get our special treats.Copy !req
84. Dude, where's my car?Copy !req
85. Where's your car dude?Copy !req
86. Dude, where's my car?Copy !req
87. Where's your car dude?Copy !req
88. Dude, where's my car?Copy !req
89. Where's your car dude?Copy !req
90. Did I drive here last night?Copy !req
91. Yeah, I think so.Copy !req
92. Did we?Copy !req
93. I'm not sure.Copy !req
94. Dude, where's your car?Copy !req
95. Dude, it's not funny, dude, the car is gone.Copy !req
96. Yeah.Copy !req
97. Dude, where's my car?Copy !req
98. Shut up dude!Copy !req
99. OK. Look. You're right. I know we need to do.Copy !req
100. We need to get back into state of
mind that we were last night.Copy !req
101. That way we can retrace our steps.Copy !req
102. Yeah.Copy !req
103. Sense memory simulated perception
altered consciences memory retrieval.Copy !req
104. Discovery Channel.Copy !req
105. Nice.Copy !req
106. Nelson's?Copy !req
107. Shibby.Copy !req
108. - I'm sick of walking dude.
- Me too.Copy !req
109. Hey! It's Mrs. Crabbleman. She'll give us a ride.Copy !req
110. Hey! Mrs. Crabbleman! Hey!Copy !req
111. Hey!Copy !req
112. Mrs. Crabbleman.Copy !req
113. Fucking stoners.Copy !req
114. She must have not recognised you.Copy !req
115. Hey! It's the Biglemans. Hey.Copy !req
116. Mr. Bigleman!Copy !req
117. Hey! Mr. Bigleman!Copy !req
118. Maybe we should just walk.Copy !req
119. Yeah.Copy !req
120. Listen, Nelson the car is gone and we
need to do this little sense memory thing...Copy !req
121. so we can get back into state of
mind that we were in last nightCopy !req
122. Deep in your consciousness you must look.Copy !req
123. Concentrate on the knowledge inside you mustCopy !req
124. Aha. Your eyes you must closeCopy !req
125. when you take it to the muuuCopy !req
126. MouuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuCopy !req
127. MouuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuCopy !req
128. Concentrating you're not dudes.Copy !req
129. Sorry.Copy !req
130. Is your dog dead?Copy !req
131. Not dead. Come here Jackal. Come here boy.Copy !req
132. I don't think he's coming.Copy !req
133. Maybe he's death dude.Copy !req
134. Death he is not dude.Copy !req
135. Come here Jackal. Come here Jackal.Copy !req
136. Does he know any other tricks besides not moving?Copy !req
137. Guys. Alright. You wanna see trick?Copy !req
138. Hey Jackal!Copy !req
139. Bite that killer. Here comes the fun.Copy !req
140. Good boy Jackal.Copy !req
141. Dude, your dog is a stoner.Copy !req
142. Can he also bone a beer?Copy !req
143. Nah, pretty much all he does is
lie around and smoke his pipe.Copy !req
144. Hey Jackal, can I see your pipe?Copy !req
145. No! Don't!Copy !req
146. Overprotective. It's his pipe.Copy !req
147. When other people touch it he does not like.Copy !req
148. Sorry Jackal.Copy !req
149. Yes. He's sorryCopy !req
150. Holy crap.Copy !req
151. That's one psycho dog dude.Copy !req
152. Yeah, hey you know what we should do now?Copy !req
153. Eat?Copy !req
154. No. Eat.Copy !req
155. Choice excellent my friend. I'll get the keys.Copy !req
156. Nelson, let me orderCopy !req
157. Chinese Foooood. May I help you?Copy !req
158. Yeah. I'd like to place an order.Copy !req
159. What would you like?Copy !req
160. Yeah, I'd like three orders of garlic chicken.Copy !req
161. And then?Copy !req
162. And then three orders of white rice.Copy !req
163. And then?Copy !req
164. And then..., you guys want soup?Copy !req
165. Sure.Copy !req
166. Yeah, Three orders of wantan soup.Copy !req
167. And then?Copy !req
168. Oh, ah, some fortune cookies too.Copy !req
169. And then?Copy !req
170. That's it. I think that's about it.Copy !req
171. And then?Copy !req
172. No. That's it.Copy !req
173. And then?Copy !req
174. No 'and then'. I..., I..., that's all I want.Copy !req
175. And then?Copy !req
176. And then, and then, and then I'm,
then nothing else coz I'm done ordering. OK?Copy !req
177. And then?Copy !req
178. No. No. See, all I want is the three
orders of the garlic chicken
and the three orders of the white riceCopy !req
179. And then?Copy !req
180. And the soup dude.Copy !req
181. Oh, and the wantan soup.Copy !req
182. And then?Copy !req
183. And the cookies fortune.Copy !req
184. And the fortune cookies, yes. So it's
just the, it's the, the chicken...Copy !req
185. the rice, the soup and the fortune
cookies and that's it.Copy !req
186. And then?Copy !req
187. And then you can put it in a brown paper bag
and come put in my hand coz I'm ready to eat.Copy !req
188. And then?Copy !req
189. I refuse to play your chinese food mind games.Copy !req
190. And then?Copy !req
191. No, No 'and then'!Copy !req
192. And then?Copy !req
193. No 'and then'!Copy !req
194. And then?Copy !req
195. No 'and then'!Copy !req
196. And then?Copy !req
197. No 'and then'!Copy !req
198. And then?Copy !req
199. No 'and then'!Copy !req
200. And then?Copy !req
201. No, no 'and then'!Copy !req
202. And then?Copy !req
203. You're really starting to piss me off lady!Copy !req
204. And then?Copy !req
205. And then, I'm gonna come in there...Copy !req
206. and I'm gonna put my foot in
your ass if you say 'and then' again!Copy !req
207. And then? And then? And then?
And then? And then?Copy !req
208. And then?Copy !req
209. Come on Nelson! Just help us find my car!Copy !req
210. You know you didn't have to
go a eggrow in that speaker box.Copy !req
211. Well I'm not the one that
called the Dalai Lama a fag.Copy !req
212. I was just kidding' around.Copy !req
213. Yeah, well Nelson didn't appreciate it. OK?Copy !req
214. Look! It's Chrisite Bonner.Copy !req
215. WOW!Copy !req
216. The hottest of the hot.Copy !req
217. El fuego of all that is el fuego.Copy !req
218. Did she just wave at us?Copy !req
219. No way!Copy !req
220. She would never wave at us.Copy !req
221. Then why did she just wave at us.Copy !req
222. I don't know. Maybe she thinks we're other people.Copy !req
223. People she waves to.Copy !req
224. Hi Chester.Copy !req
225. Hi.Copy !req
226. Hi Jesse.Copy !req
227. I had a really good time with you last night.Copy !req
228. Ah, me too.Copy !req
229. That was some crazy party, huh?Copy !req
230. Hey, ah, have you seen my car?Copy !req
231. Well, I saw it last night.Copy !req
232. I mean I saw the back seat.Copy !req
233. Oh! I'm talking about the whole thing.Copy !req
234. Why don't you just go out and buy another one
with all the money you were throwing around?Copy !req
235. Money?Copy !req
236. Yeah. Don't you remember you had that
really nice suitcase full of money?Copy !req
237. A suitcase full of moneyCopy !req
238. Don't you remember giving me
500$ to show you my hoohoos?Copy !req
239. - 500$?
- Hoohoos?Copy !req
240. You mean you don't remember anything?Copy !req
241. How about now?Copy !req
242. No.Copy !req
243. How about now?Copy !req
244. You know, I'm a little bit fuzzy too.
Maybe if I could get a little refresh of course.Copy !req
245. Alright.Copy !req
246. Are these loosers bothering you Christie?Copy !req
247. No Tommy.Copy !req
248. Guys like you could never score
with the chick like this.Copy !req
249. I suggest you stick to your own kind.Copy !req
250. You're such a jerk.Copy !req
251. Next time I catch you guys bothering my girlfriendCopy !req
252. stoner bashing time.Copy !req
253. Oh yeah?Copy !req
254. Yeah!Copy !req
255. OK.Copy !req
256. Consider this your warning.Copy !req
257. Later dudes.Copy !req
258. Dude, you just touched
Christie Bonner's hoohoo.Copy !req
259. Shibby.Copy !req
260. Low 5.Copy !req
261. Let's get out of here.Copy !req
262. That Christie Bonner is super hot.Copy !req
263. Where did we get a suitcase full of money?Copy !req
264. Man, and why don't we have it now?Copy !req
265. Maybe we deposited it in a Swiss bank account.Copy !req
266. No. If we had a ridiculous
sum of money where would we go?Copy !req
267. Dude.Copy !req
268. Sweet.Copy !req
269. No way we were here last night.Copy !req
270. We'd never fit into the place like this.Copy !req
271. Look everyone! It's Mr. Jesse and Mr. Chester!Copy !req
272. Good afternoon Jesse, Chester.
How are we feeling today?Copy !req
273. A little fuzzy.Copy !req
274. Hi Chester.Copy !req
275. Hi Jesse.Copy !req
276. Did you guys enjoy yourselves last night?Copy !req
277. Have we met?Copy !req
278. It's me, Tania.Copy !req
279. Remember last night when I gave you
that super special slippery lap dance?Copy !req
280. Of course. How can I forget?Copy !req
281. You wanna do it again?Copy !req
282. This time it's on me.Copy !req
283. If you say so.Copy !req
284. Didn't I get some sort of special lap dance?Copy !req
285. Did you ever?Copy !req
286. Sweet.Copy !req
287. Sweet.Copy !req
288. So. Just how super special
can a slippery lap dance be?Copy !req
289. What the hell were you thinking throwing around
my money like that?
That wasn't part of the plan!Copy !req
290. You're a...Copy !req
291. I'm a gender challenged male!Copy !req
292. What does that mean?Copy !req
293. Oh dude, you're a dude! That's...Copy !req
294. Oh! No!Copy !req
295. Last night I had the two of you sneak
a suitcase of stolen money out of the club.Copy !req
296. You stole the money?Copy !req
297. 200000 $.Copy !req
298. 200000 $?Copy !req
299. I gave you the suitcase and left. You guys were
supposed to meet me
but you never showed up.Copy !req
300. Where's that suitcase?Copy !req
301. I don't know.Copy !req
302. You don't know?Copy !req
303. Where's that suitcase?Copy !req
304. It's in my car.Copy !req
305. Then get it! Fast.Copy !req
306. Or else you'll be singing soprano.Copy !req
307. Dude, dude!Copy !req
308. We've got to go.Copy !req
309. What? Are you crazy? I'm
strawing by breakdancing strippers.Copy !req
310. Seriously, this is an emergency.Copy !req
311. So is this dude.Copy !req
312. It's a breakdancing stripper emergency.Copy !req
313. Bye!Copy !req
314. Bye Chester!Copy !req
315. I love you!Copy !req
316. OK. Apparently we were supposed to meet him
with the suitcase
and we just didn't show up.Copy !req
317. Huh. Sounds like us.Copy !req
318. Man.Copy !req
319. How wasted were we last night.Copy !req
320. Well, I touched Christie Bonner's hoohoo...Copy !req
321. we're on the hook for a 200000 $ on loan
from transsexual stripper
and my car is gone.Copy !req
322. I'd say we were pretty wasted.Copy !req
323. Dude, we really need to find your car.Copy !req
324. OK. Let's see, the last place we
remember being last night was...Copy !req
325. the twins.Copy !req
326. But we can't show up without the anniversary gifts.Copy !req
327. I got it.Copy !req
328. We'll just get them a
little something for now.Copy !req
329. And then, when we find the car
we'll give them the real gifts.Copy !req
330. Dollar, thirty nine.Copy !req
331. I don't know.Copy !req
332. Trust me.Copy !req
333. It's gonna be totally cool.Copy !req
334. OK.Copy !req
335. Let's go.Copy !req
336. We are so dead.Copy !req
337. Roger that.Copy !req
338. We've been cleaning all morning.
What do you guys have to say for yourselves?Copy !req
339. Happy anniversary.Copy !req
340. TheCopy !req
341. The TwinsCopy !req
342. We ate all the dark ones coz we
now you guys don't like those.Copy !req
343. Dark ones are the only ones we do like.Copy !req
344. Oh yeah.Copy !req
345. But, but, you could use the box...Copy !req
346. to keep... to keep...Copy !req
347. ribbons.Copy !req
348. You guys forgot our anniversary. Didn't you?Copy !req
349. Of course not!Copy !req
350. No! We got you guys great gifts.Copy !req
351. We just had some car troubles.Copy !req
352. Yeah. But we came over here as soon
as we could
to help you guys clean up...Copy !req
353. but, oh no.Copy !req
354. It looks like you're already done.Copy !req
355. All we have to do is take out the trash.Copy !req
356. Say, they haven't been outside yet...Copy !req
357. Oh! You know what? We'll take out the trash.Copy !req
358. You guys go and take a nice hot bath.Copy !req
359. Yeah. You deserve it after all this hard work.Copy !req
360. Go ahead and pay up to yourselves.Copy !req
361. Just don't make a mess.Copy !req
362. Slow and steady good body.Copy !req
363. 10-4Copy !req
364. You're tilting.Copy !req
365. Why are you tilting?Copy !req
366. You gave me the heavy end.Copy !req
367. No. We can get it.Copy !req
368. No. Let it go.Copy !req
369. We're not leaving it behind.Copy !req
370. OK.Copy !req
371. I'll take my shoe offCopy !req
372. Stop pushing.Copy !req
373. Watch it!Copy !req
374. Careful!Copy !req
375. You're cool?Copy !req
376. We're still cool.Copy !req
377. Now take your shoe off and you get it.Copy !req
378. OKCopy !req
379. Get it.Copy !req
380. That's it.Copy !req
381. I got it!Copy !req
382. Oh my god!Copy !req
383. You guys can't do anything right.Copy !req
384. Why do you have to mess everything up?Copy !req
385. I got three words: anger management.Copy !req
386. Yeah.Copy !req
387. Dude, we really need to find your car.Copy !req
388. Hey guys.Copy !req
389. Sorry about yanking you off the street
like that but we really need to talk to you.Copy !req
390. Who are you guys?Copy !req
391. My name is Zarnoff. This is Zabu...Copy !req
392. Zellner, Zelbor, Zelmina and Jeff.Copy !req
393. Hey.Copy !req
394. To answer your question more specifically:Copy !req
395. We are the recipients of instructions
from extraterrestrials regarding theCopy !req
396. interstellar path to outer space.Copy !req
397. Go ahead and laugh.Copy !req
398. We are used to be in mot.Copy !req
399. OK.Copy !req
400. We've been sent by a wise and powerful leaderCopy !req
401. Zoltan.Copy !req
402. to find you and recover the continuum transfunctioner.Copy !req
403. Hey. Have you guys ever been to Uranus?Copy !req
404. Yeah. It's supposed to be
really nice at this time of the year.Copy !req
405. Hey. This is important.Copy !req
406. We intercepted an interstellar
message that leads us to believe...Copy !req
407. that last night you were in
possession of the continuum transfunctioner.Copy !req
408. Where is it now?Copy !req
409. The who what?Copy !req
410. The continuum transfunctioner is a
very mysterious and powerful device...Copy !req
411. and?Copy !req
412. and it's mystery is
exceeded only by it's power.Copy !req
413. I'm sorry but we don't
remember a thing about last night.Copy !req
414. You must be careful.Copy !req
415. Danger follows the continuum transfunctioner.Copy !req
416. So says Zoltan.Copy !req
417. Zoltan.Copy !req
418. I'll tell you what. You know...Copy !req
419. we'll keep our eyes up for
the continual
transthing and if we see itCopy !req
420. we'll give you a call.Copy !req
421. Yes, you must.Copy !req
422. But remember. You are in great danger.Copy !req
423. Trust no one.Copy !req
424. Except for us.Copy !req
425. Oh yes. Thank you Jeff. Good point.Copy !req
426. Trust no one except for us.Copy !req
427. Zoltan.Copy !req
428. Wait a second. Let's recap.Copy !req
429. Last night we lost my car. We accepted
stolen money from transsexual stripper.Copy !req
430. And now some space nerds wants us to
find something we can't pronounce.Copy !req
431. I hate to say it Chester but maybe
we should cut back on the shibbying.Copy !req
432. Thanks dude.Copy !req
433. Oh good! You're right on time.Copy !req
434. You pick up special suits.Copy !req
435. Mr. Lee. Tailor. Make special suits for you.Copy !req
436. Come on.Copy !req
437. Dude, you've got a tattoo!Copy !req
438. So are you dude.Copy !req
439. No.Copy !req
440. Dude, what does mine tattoo say?Copy !req
441. Sweet.Copy !req
442. What about mine?Copy !req
443. Dude. What does mine say?Copy !req
444. Sweet. What about mine?Copy !req
445. Dude. What does mine say?Copy !req
446. Sweet. What about mine?Copy !req
447. Dude. What does mine say?Copy !req
448. Sweet. What about mine?Copy !req
449. Dude. What does mine say?Copy !req
450. Sweet. What about mine?Copy !req
451. Dude. What does mine say?Copy !req
452. Sweet. What about mine?Copy !req
453. Dude. What does mine say?Copy !req
454. Sweet.Copy !req
455. Idiots!Copy !req
456. Your tattoo
says Dude, your tattoo says sweet.Copy !req
457. Got it?Copy !req
458. Sorry.Copy !req
459. Shibby.Copy !req
460. Very sharp, very sharp. You two number one
extra special very good looking guys.Copy !req
461. So we bought these last night?Copy !req
462. Oh yeah. You were prettyCopy !req
463. 'wasted'Copy !req
464. last night.Copy !req
465. How much are these?Copy !req
466. Oh, you already paid for. I just do
some minor alteration. You know.Copy !req
467. Add the secret pockets you ordered.Copy !req
468. Hey, maybe we've got the continual transfakerCopy !req
469. Oh dude!Copy !req
470. Dude!Copy !req
471. Sweet.Copy !req
472. Cool.Copy !req
473. Excuse me, but how
did we pay for these suits?Copy !req
474. Oh, you pay cash, cold, hot, cash,
crispy new hundred dollar bills.Copy !req
475. Hey, you didn't by chance see what
car we were driving, did you?Copy !req
476. Me? No. I don't see no car.Copy !req
477. Hello.Copy !req
478. Dude, we bought cell phones.Copy !req
479. That's not all we bought dude.Copy !req
480. Shibby!Copy !req
481. Man, I can not believe we leased a car last night.Copy !req
482. But who's Johnny Potsmoker?Copy !req
483. That's my alter ego.Copy !req
484. Oh big, no, I thought that was my alter ego.Copy !req
485. No. That's my alter ego.Copy !req
486. Your alter ego is Smoky The Pot.Copy !req
487. Dude, you're never gonna figure that thing out.Copy !req
488. OK dude. There it is. Break time's over.Copy !req
489. Time to find my car.Copy !req
490. This is impossible.Copy !req
491. Are you Jesse and Chester?Copy !req
492. Huh?Copy !req
493. Are you Jesse and Chester?Copy !req
494. I don't know. Why?Copy !req
495. If you are Jesse and Chester perhaps
we will give you erotic pleasure.Copy !req
496. That's us!Copy !req
497. Right here.Copy !req
498. We are looking for the continuum transfunctioner.Copy !req
499. Who are you guys?Copy !req
500. We're not guys.Copy !req
501. We're hot chicks.Copy !req
502. She's totally right.Copy !req
503. The continuum transfunctioner is a
very mysterious and powerful deviceCopy !req
504. and...Copy !req
505. and it's mystery is only exceeded by it's power.Copy !req
506. That doesn't really help.Copy !req
507. We will give you pleasure now if
you give us the continuum transfunctioner.Copy !req
508. Let me get your proposition straight.Copy !req
509. First, you give us the pleasure,
then we give you the continuum transfunctioner?Copy !req
510. No. First, you give us the continuum transfunctioner,
then we give you the pleasure.Copy !req
511. I heard that one before.Copy !req
512. Hey look. How about this.Copy !req
513. You give... me the pleasure then we'll
give you the continuum transfunctionerCopy !req
514. then if there's time you
can take care of my friend.Copy !req
515. DudeCopy !req
516. Deal.Copy !req
517. Sweet.Copy !req
518. Will you wait a second? Please.Copy !req
519. Come here.Copy !req
520. Dude, those space nerds told us not to trust anybody.Copy !req
521. Yeah. But for the love of God.Copy !req
522. They're offering us oral pleasure.Copy !req
523. Why?Copy !req
524. Hey. Where did hot chicks go?Copy !req
525. Where's my money boys?Copy !req
526. We were just going to get it.Copy !req
527. You guys picked the wrong
transsexual stripper to screw with.Copy !req
528. You're pitching me.Copy !req
529. Let's see what the cops have to say about this.Copy !req
530. Chester!Copy !req
531. I saw this on COPS. Hit the board and hit back.Copy !req
532. Bye, bye boys.Copy !req
533. Hey, can you go on the siren?Copy !req
534. So, you're sticking to the
'I don't remember' crap?Copy !req
535. Yeah. We don't remember.Copy !req
536. Last night your car was spotted
leaving the scene of a major drug deal.Copy !req
537. Wait. You found my car?Copy !req
538. Believe me you guys got more
important things to worry about right now.Copy !req
539. Where were you between the
hours of midnight and 2AM last night?Copy !req
540. I told you. OK? We
don't remember anything.Copy !req
541. See we're gonna have to do this the hard way.Copy !req
542. Where were you last night
between the hours of midnight and 2AM?Copy !req
543. We, we don't know.Copy !req
544. Now do you remember?Copy !req
545. - No.
- No.Copy !req
546. How about now?Copy !req
547. No.Copy !req
548. Hey, leave him alone. He doesn't know anything.Copy !req
549. Now are you ready to talk?Copy !req
550. Dude, we don't remember.Copy !req
551. OK. Here're the whips you guys wanted.Copy !req
552. Hey. It's the donut guys.Copy !req
553. Yeah, these two were at the frenchy donut
house last night when me and Louie came in.Copy !req
554. We started talking and they ended
up buying donuts for the whole precinct.Copy !req
555. Uuuh, what time did all this happen?Copy !req
556. Let's see. Must have been between midnight and 2AM.Copy !req
557. Damn.Copy !req
558. You can't be the guys we're looking for.Copy !req
559. Sorry.Copy !req
560. Hang in there bro.Copy !req
561. Come on Kojak.Copy !req
562. Listen. I'm really sorry about all this.Copy !req
563. Looks like it was a
case of a mistaken identity.Copy !req
564. Actually those are the
real criminals over there.Copy !req
565. One of our officers made a wrong identification.Copy !req
566. Yeah. I'm... That was me.
I'm sorry about that one fellows.Copy !req
567. Rick here will tell you exactly where your car is.Copy !req
568. - We found the car.
- We found the car.Copy !req
569. We found the car!Copy !req
570. Now we get the anniversary gifts, go
to the twins house and get our special treats.Copy !req
571. Sweet.Copy !req
572. All right Rick. Give us
the keys and we're out of here.Copy !req
573. You got it.Copy !req
574. Oh boy. Oh, boy.Copy !req
575. What's the problem Rick?Copy !req
576. Nothing. I just..., oh boy, ok, geeze...Copy !req
577. Did you guys say you wanted
your car back or you wanted it impounded?Copy !req
578. We want the car back.Copy !req
579. That's kind of funny, coz what happened was
I accidentally sent your car to the impound.Copy !req
580. RickCopy !req
581. I know. I can definitely tell you this.
You guys can get the car back in a couple of days.Copy !req
582. We don't have couple of days.
We need the car back now.Copy !req
583. Say, how about a treat,
with bavarian cream.Copy !req
584. That's a good one there. That's a good pick.Copy !req
585. It's great. I have a lot of them.Copy !req
586. You know what Rick? Forget about it.Copy !req
587. Sure?Copy !req
588. Sike. Cheeze?Copy !req
589. Hey, you got me. Hey fellows who's the goose? Me.Copy !req
590. Damn.Copy !req
591. Have you seen Jesse and Chester?Copy !req
592. What?Copy !req
593. We're looking for Jesse and Chester.Copy !req
594. I don't know where those two slackers
are but I bet you those punks over there do.Copy !req
595. So they don't remember? I said later dudes.Copy !req
596. What are you doing hanging
out with those jerks anyway?Copy !req
597. They were just being nice
to me unlike someone I know.Copy !req
598. You know maybe it's time I find
someone who has more sensitive side Dan.Copy !req
599. Someone who respects me as a person.
Maybe somebody like Jesse and Chester.Copy !req
600. Ok guys, listen up.Copy !req
601. We're gonna find Jesse and Chester
and when we do - stoner bashing time.Copy !req
602. Do you know Jesse and Chester?Copy !req
603. Who are you?Copy !req
604. We're hot chicks.Copy !req
605. Yes you are.Copy !req
606. We believe Jesse and Chester have
the continuum transfunctioner, however...Copy !req
607. if you recover the the continuum
transfunctioner from them
and bring it to us...Copy !req
608. we will give you erotic pleasure.Copy !req
609. You've got yourselves a deal.Copy !req
610. OK guys, ok guys, new plan:Copy !req
611. First, we find those stoners, get
the continuum transfunctioner then...Copy !req
612. it's jurk bashing time.Copy !req
613. Yeah!Copy !req
614. Oh yeah. And I just remembered where you
might be able to find Jesse and ChesterCopy !req
615. We sent those chicks to meet the twins
St. Margarets' School For Blind Boys. Outdoor Activities Day.Copy !req
616. That'll put those dudes in some hot water.Copy !req
617. Try it again.Copy !req
618. OK. Just knock it out of the bark Bobby. OK?Copy !req
619. Alright. Give it a shot.Copy !req
620. OK. You almost got it that time. Now just...Copy !req
621. concentrate on the
beep and swing as hard as you can...Copy !req
622. and keep your ear on the ball. OK?Copy !req
623. Alright little buddy, you can do it.Copy !req
624. I did it!Copy !req
625. Do you know Jesse and Chester?Copy !req
626. Pardon me?Copy !req
627. We're looking for Jesse
and Chester. Have you seen them?Copy !req
628. Who are you?Copy !req
629. We're extremely hot chicks with large breasts.Copy !req
630. Really?Copy !req
631. Do you mind if I touch your face?
It's the only way I can really see who I'm talking to.Copy !req
632. OK.Copy !req
633. Wow! You are hot!Copy !req
634. Is this... normal?Copy !req
635. Oh yeah. This is how blind people shake hands.Copy !req
636. What the...? Sis!Copy !req
637. Excuse me... little help...Copy !req
638. Anthony, Anthony what is going on?Copy !req
639. Nothing. I was just reading.Copy !req
640. Bye ladies. I need to be alone now.Copy !req
641. We are looking for Jesse and ChesterCopy !req
642. Who are you guys?Copy !req
643. We are not guys. We are hot chicks.Copy !req
644. We were supposed to meet Jesse
and Chester later but we can not wait.Copy !req
645. Well, we don't know where they are.Copy !req
646. And frankly we don't care.Copy !req
647. Dude, let's call Nelson.Copy !req
648. - Yeah.
- See if he's home.Copy !req
649. Hello?Copy !req
650. Hey Nelson. It's Chester.Copy !req
651. Hey Chester! No, it's me Tommy.Copy !req
652. Your body Nelson's busy at the moment.Copy !req
653. Is bad karma boys.Copy !req
654. Hey, why don't you go ahead and tell me
where that continuum transfunctioner is.Copy !req
655. Aaaa, no hablo english.Copy !req
656. Already your friend's dead unless
I get that continuum transfunctioner.Copy !req
657. Jackal! Get your pipe.Copy !req
658. My balls!Copy !req
659. What was that?Copy !req
660. Tommy's got Nelson. He knows
about the continuum transfunctioner.Copy !req
661. Those double-crossing sexysexysluts.Copy !req
662. I'm so sick of hearing about
this continuum transfunctioner thing.Copy !req
663. I tell you what. If one more person asks..Copy !req
664. Have you found the
continuum transfunctioner?Copy !req
665. Who are you guys?Copy !req
666. We are the keepers of
the continuum transfunctioner.Copy !req
667. It is all that stands between the
universe and completely violent destruction.Copy !req
668. It is a very mysterious and powerful device..Copy !req
669. and it's mystery is
only exceeded by it's power.Copy !req
670. Yeah, we know.
And we don't have it.Copy !req
671. But the universe?Copy !req
672. Screw the universe.Copy !req
673. Screw the universe?Copy !req
674. Chimpanzees often use sticks as crude tools...Copy !req
675. That's one smart primate.Copy !req
676. Hey!
What are you guys doing here?Copy !req
677. We just wanted to come by and see
how that car trouble thing was going.Copy !req
678. Oh! The car. It's in the shop.Copy !req
679. Really. Is that that shop where
those beautiful women in black jump suits?Copy !req
680. The ones you were hanging out with earlier today?Copy !req
681. Well, you see. Jesse thought...Copy !req
682. Today's our anniversary, and not only do you
not have gifts
but you guys ditch us for someCopy !req
683. - Big breasted bimbos
- Big breasted bimbosCopy !req
684. while we were cleaning our house...Copy !req
685. About thatCopy !req
686. which you completely trashedCopy !req
687. - twice
- twiceCopy !req
688. You guys are sucky boyfriends.Copy !req
689. We just wanted to come over and tell
you guys in person that it's over.Copy !req
690. - Wilma.
- Thank you Wanda.Copy !req
691. They're totally right. We are sucky boyfriends.Copy !req
692. Do you even remember
what kind of gifts we got them?Copy !req
693. - No
- I bet we got them sucky gifts.Copy !req
694. We suck.Copy !req
695. Wait a second. I just got a really
bad feeling in the pit of my stomach.Copy !req
696. Maybe you should go sit on the toilet?Copy !req
697. No. No. You know what the feeling is?Copy !req
698. It's love!Copy !req
699. Is that what that is?Copy !req
700. Yeah, I'm in love with Wanda
and you're in love with Wilma.Copy !req
701. Yeah!Copy !req
702. You see. Now that we know
that we've been sucky boyfriends...Copy !req
703. we can change.Copy !req
704. We can?Copy !req
705. Yeah! And you know what else?Copy !req
706. I'll bet you that we did buy
them super cool anniversary gifts.Copy !req
707. You know why?Copy !req
708. Coz we love them.Copy !req
709. And we wrapped them really cool wrapping paper?Copy !req
710. Yeah.Copy !req
711. I'll tell you what we're gonna do.Copy !req
712. We're gonna go down the impound lot and get the car...Copy !req
713. which has the gifts in it...Copy !req
714. and then we're gonna go over to the twins house
and beg for them to take us back!Copy !req
715. Yeah!Copy !req
716. Let's do it!Copy !req
717. Oh, no, hold on.Copy !req
718. I gotta take a crap.Copy !req
719. Told you.Copy !req
720. - I know.
- I know your body.Copy !req
721. Boys, I got some good news for you.Copy !req
722. We just got your car in this morning.Copy !req
723. Alright!Copy !req
724. But the bad news is: Not only did officer
Boyer send your car to the impound...Copy !req
725. he tagged it for auction and
it was sold this afternoon.Copy !req
726. Rick...Copy !req
727. Do you know who bought the car?Copy !req
728. I happen to have the address right here.Copy !req
729. Alright.Copy !req
730. But it'd be against regulation
457XY2D665 to give it to you.Copy !req
731. Come on...Copy !req
732. Reaching on to this side of the counter is not allowed.Copy !req
733. The last guy who tried it
ended up with three broken fingers.Copy !req
734. Reach it.Copy !req
735. You can reach it.Copy !req
736. No. I got one of these carpal
tunnels. What if I further injure myself.Copy !req
737. I have to do everything.Copy !req
738. Well. I'm a better lookout.
My vision's better. You know that.Copy !req
739. That's it. That's it.Copy !req
740. Got it!Copy !req
741. OK. OK.Copy !req
742. What are you doing?Copy !req
743. I'm stuck.Copy !req
744. Come on.Copy !req
745. Don't...Copy !req
746. Dude, here she comes.Copy !req
747. I got it. I got it.Copy !req
748. We'll... We'll spit on it.Copy !req
749. You know. Lubrication.Copy !req
750. That's grouse dude.Copy !req
751. Here she comes. SPIT! SPIT!Copy !req
752. Good news guys. I talked to my supervisor and
he said I can give you the address after all.Copy !req
753. That's great.Copy !req
754. But the bad news isCopy !req
755. I'm gonna have to confiscate your pinkyCopy !req
756. Alright. Next stop: find my car.Copy !req
757. Hey. Check it out.Copy !req
758. Totally gaynotic dudes at 3 o'clock.Copy !req
759. Wait. I got an idea.Copy !req
760. Now we just go over there and ask
for the continuum transfunctioner?Copy !req
761. Yeah. It's that easy.Copy !req
762. Thank you both. Very much.Copy !req
763. Hey. Don't mention it.Copy !req
764. That's for the galaxy dudes.Copy !req
765. Time to get your car dude.Copy !req
766. Those creepy space nerds are back dude.Copy !req
767. Dude, you're not worried about them.Copy !req
768. They're totally harmless.Copy !req
769. Now, may I have the continuum transfunctioner?Copy !req
770. Not quite yet.Copy !req
771. Would you consider giving it to
me while I continue to give you pleasure?Copy !req
772. OK.Copy !req
773. Wake up dude.Copy !req
774. More pleasure...Copy !req
775. What?Copy !req
776. Nothing.Copy !req
777. Get dressed. We're going to the big house.Copy !req
778. Nice outfits.Copy !req
779. They're not outfits.
They're interstellar jump-suits.Copy !req
780. Hey. Nice interstellar jump-suits.Copy !req
781. Yeah.Copy !req
782. Wow! Nice place.Copy !req
783. Is this where Zoltan...Copy !req
784. Is this where Zoltan hangs out?Copy !req
785. No. This is his parent's house.Copy !req
786. We're going over there.Copy !req
787. A barn? Is it red?Copy !req
788. No.Copy !req
789. Then it's not a barn.Copy !req
790. This is creepy.Copy !req
791. It's like a country music video.Copy !req
792. Alright. That's far enough.Copy !req
793. You there.Copy !req
794. You over there.Copy !req
795. No messing around.Copy !req
796. Ok dude. Remember which one it is?Copy !req
797. - Here. Let me.
- I'll do it.Copy !req
798. It's that one.Copy !req
799. Grab the...Copy !req
800. Keys...Copy !req
801. Grab the fucking ex... and...
those studs in the head.Copy !req
802. You want the fire extinguisher?Copy !req
803. - Enough.
- No, not that one.Copy !req
804. Cool.Copy !req
805. What are you? Death?Copy !req
806. Hey. You don't have to be mean. OK?Copy !req
807. How are we gonna get out of here?Copy !req
808. Your attention please. Our
imperial commander Zoltan...Copy !req
809. requests your presence at the office ...Copy !req
810. for level seven meeting? Ah..., over.Copy !req
811. It is now my great pleasure to
present to you our wise and powerful leaderCopy !req
812. - Zoltan!
- Zoltan!Copy !req
813. - Zoltan.Copy !req
814. The time has come you guys.Copy !req
815. We are finally going to fulfil our
prophecy of outer space travel.Copy !req
816. Zoltan!Copy !req
817. They laughed at us when we said that aliens existed and
they mothed us when we started wearing...Copy !req
818. bubble wrap jump suits.
But who's laughing now?Copy !req
819. I'll tell you who's laughing now. We are!Copy !req
820. Zoltan.Copy !req
821. Soon we will leave this lame planet andCopy !req
822. fly through outer space
with cool aliens who like us.Copy !req
823. It is going to be awesome!Copy !req
824. That's them.Copy !req
825. They knocked us out and stole our spacesuits.Copy !req
826. No we didn'tCopy !req
827. Yeah you did!Copy !req
828. No we didn'tCopy !req
829. Yes you did!Copy !req
830. No we didn't.Copy !req
831. Yes you did.Copy !req
832. Hey, who you're gonna believe?
Us or them?Copy !req
833. So you're Jesse and Chester.Copy !req
834. I've been looking forward
to meeting you guys, although...Copy !req
835. I'm sorry it had to be like this.Copy !req
836. Wanda!Copy !req
837. Wilma!Copy !req
838. Normally we would never resort violence but
we are dealing with continuum transfunctioner after all.Copy !req
839. If you don't deliver it to us...Copy !req
840. your girlfriends are history.Copy !req
841. Don't worry girls. We'll save you.Copy !req
842. Yeah. You can depend on us.Copy !req
843. Enough.Copy !req
844. Go now and bring us the
continuum transfunctioner.Copy !req
845. And be quiet on your way out,
my parents are taking a nap.Copy !req
846. And then you can tell us where
the continuum transfunctioner is.Copy !req
847. And then?Copy !req
848. And then we'd be able to go and get it.Copy !req
849. And then?Copy !req
850. Can I get an order of shrimp fried rice?Copy !req
851. Wow, wow, wow.Copy !req
852. I don't see the car. Are you
sure this is the place?Copy !req
853. The car'd better be in there.Copy !req
854. I almost lost my pinky to get that info.Copy !req
855. Oh man, I sense there's something
very canadian about this place.Copy !req
856. Plan B!Copy !req
857. Right.Copy !req
858. Are you ready?Copy !req
859. Let's do this.Copy !req
860. One.Copy !req
861. Two.Copy !req
862. Three.Copy !req
863. I'm ok. You ok?Copy !req
864. Shibby.Copy !req
865. Dude. It's a lama.Copy !req
866. It's not a lama. It's an ostrich.Copy !req
867. OK. Very slowly...Copy !req
868. let's turn around...Copy !req
869. and go back the other way.Copy !req
870. OK.Copy !req
871. New plan. We turn around again...Copy !req
872. very slowly...Copy !req
873. and go back the other way.Copy !req
874. OK.Copy !req
875. They're everywhere.Copy !req
876. What now?Copy !req
877. Hey, I saw this thing about
ostriches on Animal Planet.Copy !req
878. Those are lama's dude.Copy !req
879. No. What you're supposed
to do is stand very still...Copy !req
880. and eventually they'll
get bored and go away.Copy !req
881. I think it's working.Copy !req
882. Stupid lamas.Copy !req
883. Let's go!Copy !req
884. Let's get in this car!Copy !req
885. Chester.Copy !req
886. What ostriches eat?Copy !req
887. Why?Copy !req
888. If they eat peanuts...Copy !req
889. we'll just throw them
peanuts and they'll go away.Copy !req
890. We don't have any peanuts.Copy !req
891. Great, we're screwed.Copy !req
892. They're leaving. It worked.Copy !req
893. What worked?Copy !req
894. Whatever we did.Copy !req
895. Now may I have the continuum transfunctioner?Copy !req
896. Not quite yet.Copy !req
897. Scary dream, huh?Copy !req
898. What's up? My name is Mark.Copy !req
899. Where are we?Copy !req
900. You're in punishment room.Copy !req
901. This is where he likes to
keep the ostrich poachers.Copy !req
902. Poachers?Copy !req
903. Yeah. That's right.Copy !req
904. You know, I've been in this cage for about three years
five months and seventeen days...Copy !req
905. but who's counting...Copy !req
906. How's my breath?Copy !req
907. That bad, huh?Copy !req
908. Where are you guys from?
I'm from Connecticut, hi, Mark.Copy !req
909. There we go.Copy !req
910. Chester!Copy !req
911. Get him off.Copy !req
912. Pierre.Copy !req
913. Hi.Copy !req
914. No, that's not what it looks
like. Maybe a little bit.Copy !req
915. How is your now?Copy !req
916. Shut up!Copy !req
917. Well, somebody sure is a grumpy gasp today.Copy !req
918. In France when a man is caught poaching ostriches.Copy !req
919. we shave his head and we
make him to run through the fields.Copy !req
920. Oh God, that's the good part.Copy !req
921. Once you have seen this...Copy !req
922. you are never quite the same.Copy !req
923. OK.Copy !req
924. Tell me about it. I used to model.Copy !req
925. Lucky for you I am an honorable man.Copy !req
926. What? I'm sorry.Copy !req
927. I said I am an honorable man.Copy !req
928. I'm sorry, an honograbbbble?Copy !req
929. honorable.
- honogargable?Copy !req
930. honorable.
- honogarable?Copy !req
931. I don't know what you're saying.Copy !req
932. Honorable! Honorable!Copy !req
933. I think you're trying to say honorable.Copy !req
934. Shut up!Copy !req
935. Hey, I'm sorry.Copy !req
936. Right, hear this. I am going to ask you a question.Copy !req
937. If you get it right I will set you free.Copy !req
938. If you get it wrong...Copy !req
939. well, you will be spending a lot of time with the...Copy !req
940. ever popular Mark.Copy !req
941. I can be very nice.Copy !req
942. Alright, here it is:Copy !req
943. What is the average running speed...Copy !req
944. of a full grown male african ostrich?Copy !req
945. Pass. Pass to me. I know it.Copy !req
946. Pass to Mark.Copy !req
947. You can not pass!Copy !req
948. Shut up. What do I have to do to shut you up?
Do I have to hose you down again?Copy !req
949. Don't hose me. Maybe later.Copy !req
950. Dude, we're dead.Copy !req
951. Not so fast.Copy !req
952. The full grown male african ostrich or the latin "struthio camelus"
can go to an average size of sixty six inches...Copy !req
953. and weight anywhere from 225 to
350 pounds that can get up to...Copy !req
954. well an average speed of...Copy !req
955. 27 miles per hour.Copy !req
956. This is absolutely correct.Copy !req
957. Animal Planet!Copy !req
958. Well. I said brown.Copy !req
959. Here, let me get you out of this stinky cage.Copy !req
960. Oh, please forgive me.Copy !req
961. Can I get you guys some beers?Copy !req
962. I'd like a Near-Beer please.Copy !req
963. Shut up!Copy !req
964. Well, actually we just came
about the car that you bought today.Copy !req
965. We just wanted to get some stuff out of it.Copy !req
966. No problem. Right this way.Copy !req
967. Well, it was nice meeting you guys.Copy !req
968. Good luck with the whole modeling thing.Copy !req
969. Email me. OK?Copy !req
970. The... The car was here this afternoon.Copy !req
971. It just disappeared.Copy !req
972. How do you just lose a car?Copy !req
973. I'm so sorry you guys. I...Copy !req
974. I feel terrible.Copy !req
975. Alright. Pierre. Just focus here.Copy !req
976. Was there anything in the car when you got it?Copy !req
977. No, nothing. Except of course for this.Copy !req
978. Dude!Copy !req
979. Dude, I'm having my next birthday party here for sure.Copy !req
980. Yeah, me too.Copy !req
981. Cool.Copy !req
982. Hey, excuse me. Can you tell me where locker 206 is?Copy !req
983. Yeah, it's right over there.Copy !req
984. Oh, hey, it's you guys.Copy !req
985. Dude, you guys paid an amazing
round of pot-pot last night.Copy !req
986. We did?Copy !req
987. Oh, yeah!Copy !req
988. Thanks dude.Copy !req
989. Shibby.Copy !req
990. Here it is.Copy !req
991. I sure hope my money's in there.Copy !req
992. Yep.Copy !req
993. Who are you?Copy !req
994. This is my boyfriend Patty.Copy !req
995. Nice to meet you.Copy !req
996. How did he pop a name like this?Copy !req
997. Less questions. More giving me my money!Copy !req
998. Guess this is it.Copy !req
999. Yup. The moment of truth.Copy !req
1000. It's been a long strange trip dude.Copy !req
1001. Sure has Jesse.Copy !req
1002. Hey!Copy !req
1003. I've got a plane to catch.Copy !req
1004. OK.Copy !req
1005. My suitcase.Copy !req
1006. Oh my god! You guys are the best!Copy !req
1007. Thank you so much.Copy !req
1008. Thanks for your help fellow. Good work.Copy !req
1009. Are we... Are we supposed to be grousout here?Copy !req
1010. I don't know.Copy !req
1011. Bye...Copy !req
1012. Look at this stuff. Captain Stue tickets.Copy !req
1013. Awesome.Copy !req
1014. Ohh! JellybeansCopy !req
1015. No jellybeans...Copy !req
1016. Cool straw. I'm gonna keep this.Copy !req
1017. Hey, look at these.Copy !req
1018. Dude, we speak Japanese.Copy !req
1019. Sweet!Copy !req
1020. I don't see a continuum transfunctioner in here.Copy !req
1021. Wait a second. What do we
know about the continuum transfunctioner?Copy !req
1022. That it's a very mysterious and powerful device...
- and?Copy !req
1023. and it's mystery is only exceeded by it's power.Copy !req
1024. Right!
But has anyone ever said
anything about what it looks like?Copy !req
1025. No.Copy !req
1026. That was Jesse and Chester. They've
got the continuum transfunctioner.Copy !req
1027. Quick, to my mother's minivan.Copy !req
1028. That was Jesse and Chester. They've
got the continuum transfunctioner.Copy !req
1029. Quick, to my stepdad's pickup truck.Copy !req
1030. I'm really getting a hang on this thing dude.Copy !req
1031. Yes!Copy !req
1032. Yes, I finally beat you.Copy !req
1033. You... You're a competitor.Copy !req
1034. Oh, boy, you got me the first nine, but not number ten.Copy !req
1035. Not gonna happen.Copy !req
1036. Time for the final showdown.Copy !req
1037. Chester, Jesse.Copy !req
1038. Don't worry girls. We're here to save the day.Copy !req
1039. Quit it. These things are expensive.Copy !req
1040. Enough. You have the continuum
transfunctioner or not?Copy !req
1041. Now, release our girlfriends.Copy !req
1042. First give up the transfunctioner.Copy !req
1043. First release the girlfriends.Copy !req
1044. First you give us the continuum
transfunctioner. Then...Copy !req
1045. Same time...Copy !req
1046. Yes!Copy !req
1047. We have got the continuum transfunctioner.Copy !req
1048. There they are.Copy !req
1049. OK stoners. Where's the continuum
transfunctioner?Copy !req
1050. Hey. You...Copy !req
1051. Release dodo birdCopy !req
1052. Tommy you're such a jerk.Copy !req
1053. Yeah.Copy !req
1054. That's our continuum transfunctioner.Copy !req
1055. Well now it's mine.Copy !req
1056. Nerd.Copy !req
1057. - Dude, let's get out of here
- Yeah.Copy !req
1058. Where is the continuum transfunctioner?Copy !req
1059. We don't have it.
But...Copy !req
1060. we'd like you to meet our
girlfriends Wanda and Wilma.Copy !req
1061. Yeah, we've already met.Copy !req
1062. You'd better stay away from our boyfriends.Copy !req
1063. You fake breasted sluts.Copy !req
1064. OK. Let's go this way.Copy !req
1065. Halt. Where is the continuum transfunctioner?Copy !req
1066. Well, you wanna go talk to that guy over there.Copy !req
1067. Let the pleasure begin.Copy !req
1068. That is not the continuum transfunctioner.Copy !req
1069. Of course it is.Copy !req
1070. Follow the kids.
Come on. Follow. Go. Go.Copy !req
1071. Nerd bashing time.Copy !req
1072. It's not our fault. It was them.Copy !req
1073. Looking for a Smoky McPot. I
have a delivery for a Smoky McPot.Copy !req
1074. You ordered pizza?Copy !req
1075. Yeah. I figured we'd get hungry.Copy !req
1076. Oh, no! It's you two!Copy !req
1077. Look dude, I almost got it.Copy !req
1078. Dude, you're really starting to piss me
with your Rubik's Cube obsession. OK?Copy !req
1079. Sweet!Copy !req
1080. Wow!Copy !req
1081. No wonder those things are so impossible.Copy !req
1082. Oh no, you've activated the
continuum transfunctioner.Copy !req
1083. Alright, what's going on?Copy !req
1084. Once all five of the Darusi
Crystals stop flashing the...Copy !req
1085. universe is going to be destroyed.Copy !req
1086. How do you know all that?Copy !req
1087. We've been intercepting
interstellar transmissions for years.Copy !req
1088. Zoltan!Copy !req
1089. Nerds.Copy !req
1090. Way to go Chester.Copy !req
1091. I'm sorry.Copy !req
1092. Quickly. You must give it to us so we can deactivate it.
We are the keepers of the continuum transfunctioner.Copy !req
1093. They will use it to destroy the universe.Copy !req
1094. No. We are the keepers of the
continuum transfunctioner.Copy !req
1095. They want to destroy the universe.Copy !req
1096. Stop copying us.Copy !req
1097. Stop copying us.Copy !req
1098. Stop copying us.Copy !req
1099. Stop copying us.Copy !req
1100. Bitch.Copy !req
1101. Don't you guys remember?Copy !req
1102. We came to this planet last night to escape
the clutches of those evil space sluts.Copy !req
1103. We met you here at the space-o-rama
and then
you gave us a ride back to our space ship...Copy !req
1104. and that's when we realized that
we had lost the continuum transfunctioner.Copy !req
1105. Hurry, there's only three blinking lights left.Copy !req
1106. Bye, bye universe.Copy !req
1107. He's right dude. We're gonna make the wrong decision.Copy !req
1108. You know what dude. I refuse to let us go down
in history
as the dudes who destroyed the universe.Copy !req
1109. How do we figure out which ones are the true keepers
of the continuum transfunctioner?Copy !req
1110. Well, it's... it's simple.Copy !req
1111. We just ask them a question about last night
that only the ones that are telling the truth would know.Copy !req
1112. But we can't remember a thing.Copy !req
1113. You gotta hurry.Copy !req
1114. Not now Jeff.Copy !req
1115. If we really did give one
of you guys a ride last night...Copy !req
1116. then you'll know the answer to this question:Copy !req
1117. Hurry!Copy !req
1118. What score did we get on the eighteenth
hole of the miniature golf course last night?Copy !req
1119. You got the hole-in-one.Copy !req
1120. That...Copy !req
1121. is...Copy !req
1122. correct.Copy !req
1123. Deactivation complete.Copy !req
1124. Wait a second. If you guys don't
remember a thing about last night...Copy !req
1125. how do you know they were telling the truth?Copy !req
1126. Well, it's simple really.Copy !req
1127. The pudding!Copy !req
1128. Wow, you guys had a plan!Copy !req
1129. And it actually worked.Copy !req
1130. For the love of God.Copy !req
1131. Wow, morphing is cool.Copy !req
1132. Wow, that is one super hot giant alien.Copy !req
1133. Let's go!Copy !req
1134. Chester, Jesse.Copy !req
1135. That is amazing.
- Yeah.Copy !req
1136. Those are the biggest hoohoos I have ever seen.Copy !req
1137. We will now use the power of the
continuum transfunctioner
to punish you to hookCopy !req
1138. of the New Jersey..Copy !req
1139. What are we supposed to do now?Copy !req
1140. I think we run dude.Copy !req
1141. Those guys are in a hurry.Copy !req
1142. I wanna go with that one daddy.Copy !req
1143. Me too son, me too.Copy !req
1144. Hey, what do I do with this thing?Copy !req
1145. You gotta activate the PHOTON
ACCELERATOR ANNIHILATION BEAM.Copy !req
1146. The what?Copy !req
1147. They said: the PHOTONCopy !req
1148. you fools!Copy !req
1149. Hurry, activate it dude.Copy !req
1150. I think this is it.Copy !req
1151. Thank you captain obvious.Copy !req
1152. I can't reach it.Copy !req
1153. Deep, in your conciseness you must look.Copy !req
1154. Concentrate on the knowledge inside you must.Copy !req
1155. Do you have to talk like that?Copy !req
1156. I like the way you talk.Copy !req
1157. 'Chimpanzees often use sticks as crude tools'Copy !req
1158. I got it!Copy !req
1159. Oh boy.Copy !req
1160. We saved the universe.Copy !req
1161. The big bitch is dead.Copy !req
1162. Damn. Now those are some big ass panties.Copy !req
1163. Christie honey could you give me a hand?Copy !req
1164. No Tommy. I've found somebody else.Copy !req
1165. Jesse and Chester just saved the universe.Copy !req
1166. You guys are still gonna
take us into outer space. Right?Copy !req
1167. There is a party in a
Crab Nebula. You guys can come to.Copy !req
1168. There you go.Copy !req
1169. Thanks for your help. Jesse and Chester.Copy !req
1170. You have helped insure the safety of the universe.Copy !req
1171. Well that's the cool and all, but...Copy !req
1172. dude, where's my car?Copy !req
1173. You mean you guys don't remember?Copy !req
1174. Damn, you were wasted last night.Copy !req
1175. Now, before we go, we must
eliminate all knowledge of this encounter.Copy !req
1176. Wait, no. We have so many questions
that we'd wanna ask you about the universe.Copy !req
1177. Like what?Copy !req
1178. Well...Copy !req
1179. Have you guys ever been to Uranus?Copy !req
1180. Nice.Copy !req
1181. Good morning guys.Copy !req
1182. Morning Gene.Copy !req
1183. We'll go over to the twins house...Copy !req
1184. and then?Copy !req
1185. and then we give them their anniversary gifts...Copy !req
1186. and then?Copy !req
1187. and then we'll apologize for trashing the house.Copy !req
1188. and then?Copy !req
1189. and then we get our special treats.Copy !req
1190. and then?Copy !req
1191. Dude, that's really annoying.Copy !req
1192. Sorry.Copy !req
1193. Dude, where's my car?Copy !req
1194. Dude, where's my car?Copy !req
1195. Where's your car dude?Copy !req
1196. Dude, there's your car.Copy !req
1197. I heart U.Copy !req
1198. You guys are great boyfriends.Copy !req
1199. We have something for you too.Copy !req
1200. A very special treat.Copy !req
1201. Shibby!Copy !req
1202. We saw the names on ourselves.Copy !req
1203. Wow.Copy !req
1204. Put them on!Copy !req
1205. You guys look great.Copy !req
1206. What are these?Copy !req
1207. Ah, more gifts.Copy !req
1208. They're beautiful.Copy !req
1209. Where did you guys get these?Copy !req
1210. This place.Copy !req
1211. Thank you for helping to save the universeCopy !req
1212. We hope your girlfriends like these giftsCopy !req
1213. We know you willCopy !req
1214. How wasted were we last night?Copy !req
1215. Sweet.Copy !req
1216. Dude.Copy !req
1217. Is anyone hungry?Copy !req
1218. Yeah.Copy !req
1219. I can go for some chinese food.Copy !req
1220. That sounds great.Copy !req
1221. Sweet.Copy !req
1222. My back itches dude.Copy !req
1223. Jesse you got a tattoo.Copy !req
1224. Oh my god, so do you Chester.Copy !req
1225. No way. What's mine say?Copy !req
1226. Dude.Copy !req
1227. What about mine?Copy !req
1228. Sweet.Copy !req
1229. Yeah, but what does mine say?Copy !req
1230. Dude.Copy !req
1231. What about mine?Copy !req
1232. Sweet.Copy !req
1233. I know they're sweet, but dude what does mine say?Copy !req
1234. Dude!Copy !req
1235. What about mine?Copy !req
1236. Sweet.Copy !req
1237. Hit it!Copy !req
1238. I can you sexy.Copy !req
1239. How did he pop on up like this?Copy !req
1240. This isn't fair. They're booting usCopy !req
1241. Sweet!
Dude!Copy !req
1242. I am fun loving. I like charades.Copy !req
1243. Shut up!Copy !req
1244. Go ahead and laugh.Copy !req
1245. Zoltan.Copy !req
1246. That's keeperCopy !req
1247. Fingers crossed. I'm outCopy !req
1248. I got it.Copy !req
1249. You wanna piece of this?Copy !req
1250. Dude!Copy !req
1251. Sweet!Copy !req
1252. And then?Copy !req
1253. and then we went and leasedCopy !req
1254. and then?Copy !req
1255. got those sweet jumpsuits we...Copy !req
1256. and then?Copy !req
1257. then we went... oh man... I'm losing itCopy !req
1258. I am fun loving, without my clothesCopy !req
1259. the PHOTOMIC INS... the great thing... dummy!Copy !req
1260. Dude!Copy !req
1261. Sweet!Copy !req
1262. Shall we cut?Copy !req
1263. We've got to cut. I mean we'd have to.Copy !req
1264. This dudes have to cut it.Copy !req
1265. Cut.Copy !req
1266. Punkass kids!Copy !req