1. Mrs. Teasdale.
Copy !req
2. Yes, Your Excellency?
Copy !req
3. I again ask you
to reconsider.
Copy !req
4. Gentlemen, I've already
loaned Freedonia
Copy !req
5. more than half the fortune
my husband left me.
Copy !req
6. I consider
that money lost.
Copy !req
7. And now, you're asking
for another $20 million.
Copy !req
8. But it would only be for a few months
to meet this present emergency.
Copy !req
9. With $20 million
in the treasury,
Copy !req
10. we can announce an immediate
reduction in the taxes.
Copy !req
11. That's all that the
people are asking for.
Copy !req
12. I'm sorry, but I'm inclined
to agree with the people.
Copy !req
13. The government
has been mismanaged.
Copy !req
14. What?
Copy !req
15. I will lend the money but only on
condition that His Excellency withdraw
Copy !req
16. and place the government
in new hands.
Copy !req
17. You ask me to give up my office?
Copy !req
18. Yes, Your Excellency.
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19. In a crisis like this, I feel
Freedonia needs a new leader,
Copy !req
20. a progressive,
fearless fighter!
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21. A man like
Rufus T. Firefly!
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22. Rufus T. Firefly?
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23. I will lend the
money to Freedonia
Copy !req
24. only if Firefly is
appointed leader.
Copy !req
25. The Honorable Secretary
of Finance and Party.
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26. His Excellency, Ambassador
Trentino of Sylvania.
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27. Ambassador.
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28. Mrs. Teasdale.
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29. It was so good
of you to come.
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30. I'm anxious for you to meet the
new leader of our country.
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31. No matter who rules in Freedonia, Mrs.
Teasdale,
Copy !req
32. to me, you will always be
the first lady of the land.
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33. Oh, permit me. This
is Miss Vera Marcal.
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34. Ambassador Trentino.
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35. Miss Marcal needs
no introduction,
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36. I've seen her dance many
times at the theater.
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37. Thank you.
Copy !req
38. The Honorable
Pandooh of Mufhtan.
Copy !req
39. I must greet
His Honor.
Copy !req
40. What have you
found out?
Copy !req
41. Nothing. I've been waiting
to hear from you.
Copy !req
42. I've given up the
idea of a revolution.
Copy !req
43. I have a better plan.
Oh, yes?
Copy !req
44. I can gain control of Freedonia much
easier by marrying Mrs. Teasdale.
Copy !req
45. Maybe that's not
going to be so easy.
Copy !req
46. Eh?
Oh, from what I hear.
Copy !req
47. You see, Mrs. Teasdale is rather
sweet on this Rufus T. Firefly.
Copy !req
48. Oh, well, that's
where you come in.
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49. I'm going to place
him in your hands.
Copy !req
50. And I don't have to tell you
what to do or how to... Careful.
Copy !req
51. I want you to meet His Excellency's
Secretary, Bob Roland.
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52. Ambassador Trentino.
How do you do, sir?
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53. Miss Marcal.
We've met.
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54. Of course.
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55. Well, I hope His
Excellency gets here soon.
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56. His Excellency makes it a
point always to be on time.
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57. As long as I've known him, he's
never been late for an appointment.
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58. His Excellency is due
to take his station
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59. Beginning his new
administration
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60. He'll make his
appearance when
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61. The clock on the
wall strikes 10:00
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62. When the clock on
the wall strikes 10:00
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63. All you loyal ladies
and you patriotic men
Copy !req
64. Let's sing the
national anthem when
Copy !req
65. The clock on
the wall strikes 10:00
Copy !req
66. His Excellency is due
to take his station
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67. Beginning his new
administration
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68. He'll make his
appearance when
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69. The clock on the
wall strikes 10:00
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70. We'll give him
a rousing cheer
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71. To show him
we're glad he's here
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72. Hail, hail Freedonia
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73. Hail, hail Freedonia
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74. Land of the brave
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75. And free
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76. Hail, hail Freedonia
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77. Land of the brave
and free
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78. Hail, hail Freedonia
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79. Land of the brave
and free
Copy !req
80. You expecting
somebody?
Copy !req
81. Yes.
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82. Hail, hail Freedonia
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83. Land of the brave
and free
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84. Oh, Your Excellency,
we've been expecting you.
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85. As Chairwoman of the
Reception Committee,
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86. I extend the good wishes of every
man, woman and child of Freedonia.
Copy !req
87. Never mind that
stuff. Take a card.
Copy !req
88. Card? What'll I do
with a card?
Copy !req
89. You can keep it.
I've got 51 left.
Copy !req
90. Now what
were you saying?
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91. As Chairwoman of the
Reception Committee,
Copy !req
92. I welcome you
with open arms.
Copy !req
93. Is that so? How late
do you stay open?
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94. I've sponsored
your appointment
Copy !req
95. because I feel you are the most
able statesman in all Freedonia.
Copy !req
96. Well, that covers
a lot of ground.
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97. Say, you cover a lot of ground yourself.
You'd better beat it.
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98. I hear they're gonna
tear you down
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99. and put up an office building
where you're standing.
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100. You can leave in a taxi. If you can't
get a taxi, you can leave in a huff.
Copy !req
101. If that's too soon, you can
leave in a minute and a huff.
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102. You know, you haven't stopped
talking since I came here.
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103. You must have been vaccinated
with a phonograph needle.
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104. The future of Freedonia
rests on you.
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105. Promise me you'll follow in
the footsteps of my husband.
Copy !req
106. How do you like that? I haven't
been on the job five minutes
Copy !req
107. and already she's
making advances to me.
Copy !req
108. Not that I care, but
where is your husband?
Copy !req
109. Why, he's dead.
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110. I'll bet he's just using
that as an excuse.
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111. I was with him
till the very end.
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112. Hmm! No wonder
he passed away.
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113. I held him in my
arms and kissed him.
Copy !req
114. Oh, I see.
Then it was murder.
Copy !req
115. Will you marry me? Did
he leave you any money?
Copy !req
116. Answer the second
question first.
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117. He left me his entire fortune.
Is that so?
Copy !req
118. Can't you see what I'm trying to tell you?
I love you.
Copy !req
119. Oh, Your Excellency!
Copy !req
120. You're not
so bad yourself.
Copy !req
121. Oh, I want to
present to you
Copy !req
122. Ambassador Trentino
of Sylvania.
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123. Having him with us today is
indeed a great pleasure.
Copy !req
124. Thank you, but I can't
stay very long.
Copy !req
125. That's even a
greater pleasure.
Copy !req
126. Now, how about lending this country
$20 million, you old skinflint?
Copy !req
127. $20 million is
a lot of money.
Copy !req
128. I'd have to take that up
with my Minister of Finance.
Copy !req
129. Well, in the meantime, could you
let me have $12 until payday?
Copy !req
130. $12? Don't be scared.
You'll get it back.
Copy !req
131. I'll give you my personal
note for 90 days.
Copy !req
132. If it isn't paid by then,
you can keep the note.
Copy !req
133. Your Excellency, haven't we seen
each other somewhere before?
Copy !req
134. I don't think so. I'm not sure I'm
seeing you now. Must be something I ate.
Copy !req
135. Look here, sir!
Are you trying to...
Copy !req
136. Don't look now,
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137. but there's one man too many in
this room, and I think it's you.
Copy !req
138. Oh, I'm so sorry.
Copy !req
139. I want you to meet
a very charming lady.
Copy !req
140. And it's about time.
Copy !req
141. Just a moment.
Copy !req
142. I want to present
Miss Vera Marcal.
Copy !req
143. Go ahead.
I can take it.
Copy !req
144. Oh, you
don't understand.
Copy !req
145. This is Vera Marcal,
the famous dancer.
Copy !req
146. Is that so?
Can you do this one?
Copy !req
147. I danced
before Napoleon.
Copy !req
148. No, Napoleon
danced before me.
Copy !req
149. In fact, he danced
200 years before me.
Copy !req
150. Here's one I picked
up in a dance hall.
Copy !req
151. Here's another one I
picked up in a dance hall.
Copy !req
152. Perhaps sometime we get a
chance to dance together, huh?
Copy !req
153. I could dance with you till
the cows come home. Yeah?
Copy !req
154. On second thought, I'd rather dance
with the cows till you come home.
Copy !req
155. Where is
my secretary?
Copy !req
156. Here I am.
Copy !req
157. Good heavens,
Your Excellency!
Copy !req
158. Uh, take a letter.
Who to?
Copy !req
159. To my dentist.
Copy !req
160. "Dear dentist, enclosed find check
for $500. Yours very truly."
Copy !req
161. Send it off immediately!
Copy !req
162. I'll have to enclose
the check first.
Copy !req
163. You do and I'll fire you.
Copy !req
164. Your Excellency, the eyes
of the world are upon you.
Copy !req
165. Notables from every country are
gathered here in your honor.
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166. This is a gala
day for you.
Copy !req
167. Well, a gal a day
is enough for me.
Copy !req
168. I don't think I could
handle anymore.
Copy !req
169. If it's not
asking too much...
Copy !req
170. For our information,
just for illustration
Copy !req
171. Tell us how you intend
to run the nation
Copy !req
172. These are the laws
of my administration
Copy !req
173. No one's allowed to smoke
or tell a dirty joke
Copy !req
174. And whistling
is forbidden
Copy !req
175. We're not allowed
to tell a dirty joke
Copy !req
176. Hail, hail Freedonia
Copy !req
177. If chewing gum is chewed
the chewer is pursued
Copy !req
178. And in the hoosegow hidden
Copy !req
179. If we choose to chew
we'll be pursued
Copy !req
180. If any form of
pleasure is exhibited
Copy !req
181. Report to me and
it will be prohibited
Copy !req
182. I'll put my foot down
So shall it be
Copy !req
183. This is the land
of the free
Copy !req
184. The last man nearly
ruined this place
Copy !req
185. He didn't know
what to do with it
Copy !req
186. If you think this
country's bad off now
Copy !req
187. Just wait till
I get through with it
Copy !req
188. The country's
taxes must be fixed
Copy !req
189. And I know what
to do with it
Copy !req
190. If you think you're
paying too much now
Copy !req
191. Just wait till
I get through with it
Copy !req
192. I will not stand for anything
that's crooked or unfair
Copy !req
193. I'm strictly on the up and
up so everyone beware
Copy !req
194. If anyone's caught taking graft
and I don't get my share
Copy !req
195. We stand 'em up against the
wall and pop goes the weasel
Copy !req
196. So everyone beware
who's crooked or unfair
Copy !req
197. No one must take a bit of graft
unless he gets his share
Copy !req
198. If any man should come between
a husband and his bride
Copy !req
199. We find out which one she
prefers by letting her decide
Copy !req
200. If she prefers the other man
the husband steps outside
Copy !req
201. We stand 'em up against the
wall and pop goes the weasel
Copy !req
202. The husband steps outside,
relinquishes his bride
Copy !req
203. They stand him up against the
wall and take away his bride
Copy !req
204. You have an appointment at the
House of Representatives.
Copy !req
205. Good heavens! You can't
go with your trousers up!
Copy !req
206. I can't, eh? Well, they'll
never catch me any other way.
Copy !req
207. My car!
His Excellency's car!
Copy !req
208. His Excellency's car!
Copy !req
209. His Excellency's car!
Copy !req
210. His Excellency's car!
Copy !req
211. I'm in a hurry. To the House of
Representatives. Ride like fury.
Copy !req
212. If you run out of gas, get ethyl.
If Ethel runs out, get Mabel.
Copy !req
213. Now step on it!
Copy !req
214. Well, it certainly feels
good to be back again.
Copy !req
215. I have failed,
Ambassador.
Copy !req
216. I know it,
I know it, you idiot!
Copy !req
217. I'm sorry.
Copy !req
218. You have
muddled everything.
Copy !req
219. If you'd started the revolution
as I planned, during the turmoil
Copy !req
220. I could've stepped in and placed Freedonia
under the Sylvanian flag, our flag.
Copy !req
221. But Firefly blocked us!
Copy !req
222. Your Excellency, you have no idea
how popular he is in Freedonia.
Copy !req
223. Oh, yes,
I've known of that, too!
Copy !req
224. That's why I have two
spies shadowing him.
Copy !req
225. I want to find out something about
him, something to disgrace him,
Copy !req
226. to discredit him
with the people.
Copy !req
227. Ambassador, Chicolini
and Pinky are here.
Copy !req
228. Now, these
are my spies.
Copy !req
229. Show them in.
Wait outside.
Copy !req
230. We fool you good, eh?
Copy !req
231. Gentlemen!
Copy !req
232. Gentlemen,
what is this?
Copy !req
233. Shh! This is spy stuff.
Copy !req
234. Telegram
for you, sir.
Copy !req
235. Oh.
Copy !req
236. He gets mad because
he can't read.
Copy !req
237. Oh, I see.
Copy !req
238. Well, gentlemen, we have
serious matters to discuss.
Copy !req
239. Please be seated.
Copy !req
240. Rock-a-bye...
Gentlemen, gentlemen!
Copy !req
241. Now, about
that information...
Copy !req
242. Wait, wait, wait, wait.
Here, have a cigar.
Copy !req
243. That's a good
quarter cigar.
Copy !req
244. I smoked the other
three-quarters myself.
Copy !req
245. Yes. No, thank you,
I have one of my own.
Copy !req
246. Here.
Try one of these!
Copy !req
247. Hey, that's no good.
Copy !req
248. That's good!
That's fine.
Copy !req
249. That's good.
Copy !req
250. Now let's concentrate.
Copy !req
251. Have you been
trailing Firefly?
Copy !req
252. Have we been
trailing Firefly?
Copy !req
253. Why, my partner, he's got a
nose just like a bloodhound.
Copy !req
254. Really?
Yeah.
Copy !req
255. And the rest of his face
don't look so good either.
Copy !req
256. Look, we find out all
about this Firefly.
Copy !req
257. Here, look at this. Ah,
very good, very good!
Copy !req
258. Wait a minute. We must
not be disturbed.
Copy !req
259. Yes, sir?
Copy !req
260. This is a very
important conference.
Copy !req
261. I do not wish
to be interrupted.
Copy !req
262. Yes, sir.
Copy !req
263. Uh-uh, uh-uh!
Copy !req
264. Gentlemen, we are not
getting anywhere.
Copy !req
265. You're out!
Copy !req
266. Ah-ah-ah-ah-ah!
Now gentlemen, please!
Copy !req
267. Will you tell me what you
found out about Firefly?
Copy !req
268. Well, you remember you gave us a
picture of this man and said,
Copy !req
269. "Follow him"?
Oh, yes.
Copy !req
270. Well, we get on
the job right away.
Copy !req
271. And in one hour, even
less than one hour...
Copy !req
272. Yes?
Copy !req
273. we lose the picture. That's
a pretty quick work, eh?
Copy !req
274. But I asked you to dig up something
I can use against Firefly.
Copy !req
275. Did you bring
me his record?
Copy !req
276. No, no!
Copy !req
277. And the boy
gets a cigar.
Copy !req
278. Now, Chicolini, I want a full detailed
report of your investigation.
Copy !req
279. All right, I tell you.
Copy !req
280. Monday, we watch Firefly's
house, but he no come out.
Copy !req
281. He wasn't home.
Copy !req
282. Tuesday, we go to the ball game,
but he fool us. He no show up.
Copy !req
283. Wednesday, he go to the ball game,
but we fool him! We no show up.
Copy !req
284. Thursday was a double-header,
nobody show up.
Copy !req
285. Friday, it rained all day.
There was no ball game.
Copy !req
286. So we stayed home and we
listened to it over the radio.
Copy !req
287. Then you didn't
shadow Firefly!
Copy !req
288. Oh, sure we shadow Firefly.
We shadow him all day.
Copy !req
289. But what day was that?
Shaderday!
Copy !req
290. That's some joke,
huh, boss?
Copy !req
291. Now, will you tell me,
what happened on Saturday?
Copy !req
292. I'm glad you asked me.
Copy !req
293. We follow this man
down to a road house.
Copy !req
294. And at this road house
he meet a married lady.
Copy !req
295. A married lady?
Copy !req
296. Yeah, I think
it was his wife.
Copy !req
297. Firefly has no wife!
Copy !req
298. No?
No!
Copy !req
299. Then you know what I think, boss?
What?
Copy !req
300. I think we followed
the wrong man.
Copy !req
301. Oh, gentlemen,
I am disappointed.
Copy !req
302. I entrusted you with a mission of
great importance and you failed.
Copy !req
303. However, I am going to
give you one more chance.
Copy !req
304. I have credentials here that will get
you into any place in Freedonia.
Copy !req
305. If I can only...
Ah, here we are.
Copy !req
306. Are you sure that
you can trap Firefly?
Copy !req
307. Remember, this time
I expect results.
Copy !req
308. Goodbye
and good luck.
Copy !req
309. Okay, Cap.
Copy !req
310. Come on, Pinky.
Goodbye.
Copy !req
311. All right, the meeting's
called to order.
Copy !req
312. Your Excellency,
Copy !req
313. here's the Treasury
Department's report.
Copy !req
314. I hope you'll
find it clear.
Copy !req
315. Clear? Huh!
Copy !req
316. Why, a 4-year-old child could
understand this report.
Copy !req
317. Run out and find me
a 4-year-old child.
Copy !req
318. I can't make head
or tail out of it.
Copy !req
319. And now, members of the cabinet,
we'll take up old business.
Copy !req
320. I wish to
discuss the tariff.
Copy !req
321. Sit down,
that's new business.
Copy !req
322. No old business? Very well. Then
we'll take up new business.
Copy !req
323. Now about that tariff...
Too late!
Copy !req
324. That's old business
already. Sit down.
Copy !req
325. Gentlemen, as your
Secretary of War, I...
Copy !req
326. The Secretary of War
is out of order!
Copy !req
327. Which reminds me, so is the plumbing.
Make a note of that.
Copy !req
328. Never mind,
I'll do it myself.
Copy !req
329. The Department of Labor
wishes to report
Copy !req
330. that the workers of Freedonia
are demanding shorter hours.
Copy !req
331. Very well, we'll give
them shorter hours.
Copy !req
332. We'll start by cutting their
lunch hour to 20 minutes.
Copy !req
333. And now, gentlemen, we've got to
start looking for a new Treasurer.
Copy !req
334. But you appointed
one last week!
Copy !req
335. That's the one
I'm looking for.
Copy !req
336. Gentlemen, gentlemen,
enough of this.
Copy !req
337. How about taking
up the tax?
Copy !req
338. How about taking
up the carpet?
Copy !req
339. I still insist we must
take up the tax!
Copy !req
340. He's right, you've got to take up the
tacks before you can take up the carpet.
Copy !req
341. I give all my time and energy
to my duties and what do I get?
Copy !req
342. You get awfully
tiresome after a while.
Copy !req
343. Sir, you try
my patience.
Copy !req
344. I don't mind if I do. You must
come over and try mine sometime.
Copy !req
345. That's the last straw!
I resign!
Copy !req
346. I wash my hands
off the whole business.
Copy !req
347. That's a good idea. You
can wash your neck, too.
Copy !req
348. Peanuts!
Copy !req
349. Hey, come here!
Copy !req
350. Just the guy
I wanna see.
Copy !req
351. What do you find out
about this guy Firefly?
Copy !req
352. You find out something?
You no find out something?
Copy !req
353. You spy on him?
You no spy on him?
Copy !req
354. What's the matter? All the time I
talk to you, you no say nothing.
Copy !req
355. What's the matter,
you no speak, eh?
Copy !req
356. Stop this! What you find, eh?
What you find?
Copy !req
357. That's no good!
Copy !req
358. Hey, come here. You're crazy.
What's the matter with you?
Copy !req
359. Why you make
a face like this?
Copy !req
360. What's the matter
with you?
Copy !req
361. Ah, come on, you wanna fight, huh?
You wanna fight?
Copy !req
362. Come on,
I give you fight.
Copy !req
363. Hey, upstairs this time,
no downstairs!
Copy !req
364. Come on.
Copy !req
365. What you think
you are, eh?
Copy !req
366. Hey, what's the idea of
fighting in front of my place
Copy !req
367. and driving my
customers away?
Copy !req
368. Hey, mister, you got
a mistake someplace.
Copy !req
369. I no fight. You understand,
this guy, he's working for me.
Copy !req
370. I ask him something,
and he no tell me nothing.
Copy !req
371. I ask him why he no speak,
all the time he no speak.
Copy !req
372. What do you
think he do?
Copy !req
373. He make fight
go like this.
Copy !req
374. Hey, what's the idea?
Copy !req
375. That's not my idea,
that's his idea.
Copy !req
376. All time I say something,
he no say nothing.
Copy !req
377. Every time I say...
Will you shut up?
Copy !req
378. Hey, listen, what are
you doing around here?
Copy !req
379. Who are you?
Copy !req
380. Hey, can't you say...
Can't you say anything?
Copy !req
381. No! He no say nothing, he...
Oh, shut up!
Copy !req
382. I am shut up, but, mister,
you no understand.
Copy !req
383. Look, he's a spy and I'm a spy.
He work for me.
Copy !req
384. I want him to find out something but
he no find out what I wanna find out.
Copy !req
385. Now how am I gonna find
out what I wanna find out
Copy !req
386. if he no find out
what I gotta find out?
Copy !req
387. Will you quit
annoying me?
Copy !req
388. All right, I quit. All you gotta
do is make him stop doing this.
Copy !req
389. Oh!
Copy !req
390. Now just for that, I'm gonna tear
you limb from limb, limb from limb!
Copy !req
391. You'd think
they'd do the same...
Copy !req
392. You see, I no say one thing,
mister, before when you...
Copy !req
393. No, no.
Copy !req
394. Oh! Now, now
I'm gonna get you!
Copy !req
395. What are you doing?
Copy !req
396. Why, you...
Copy !req
397. I'll teach you
to kick me!
Copy !req
398. You don't have to teach me.
I know how.
Copy !req
399. Stop it. Look out!
Copy !req
400. Oh!
Copy !req
401. That's good, eh?
Copy !req
402. Peanuts!
Copy !req
403. Hey!
Copy !req
404. You wanna be
a public nuisance?
Copy !req
405. Sure, how much
does the job pay?
Copy !req
406. I've got a good mind to join a club
and beat you over the head with it.
Copy !req
407. Peanuts to you!
Copy !req
408. Have you got a license?
License?
Copy !req
409. No, but my dog,
he's got millions of 'em.
Copy !req
410. Believe me,
he's some smart dog.
Copy !req
411. You know, he went with
Admiral Byrd to the Pole.
Copy !req
412. I'll bet the dog
got to the Pole first.
Copy !req
413. You win.
Copy !req
414. Come on up here.
I wanna scare the cabinet.
Copy !req
415. Hello? Hello?
No, no, he's not in.
Copy !req
416. All right, I tell him.
Goodbye.
Copy !req
417. That was for you.
Copy !req
418. I'm sorry I'm not in. I want
to have a long talk with you.
Copy !req
419. Now listen here, you give
up that silly peanut stand
Copy !req
420. and I'll get you a
soft government job.
Copy !req
421. Now let's see, how would you
like a job in the mint?
Copy !req
422. Mint? No, no.
I no like mint.
Copy !req
423. What other
flavor you got?
Copy !req
424. Hello? Hello?
No, not yet.
Copy !req
425. All right, I tell him.
Goodbye. Thank you.
Copy !req
426. That was
for you again.
Copy !req
427. I wonder whatever
became of me.
Copy !req
428. I should have been back
here a long time ago.
Copy !req
429. Now listen here, I've got
a swell job for you,
Copy !req
430. but first I have to ask you a
couple of important questions.
Copy !req
431. Now, what is it that has
four pair of pants,
Copy !req
432. lives in Philadelphia,
Copy !req
433. and it never rains
but it pours?
Copy !req
434. That's a good one.
I give you three guesses.
Copy !req
435. Now let me see, has four pair of
pants, lives in Philadelphia...
Copy !req
436. Is it male or female?
Copy !req
437. No, I don't think so.
Copy !req
438. Is he dead?
Copy !req
439. Who?
Copy !req
440. I don't know.
I give up!
Copy !req
441. I give up, too.
Copy !req
442. Now I ask you
another one.
Copy !req
443. What is it got
a big black mustache,
Copy !req
444. smokes a big
black cigar,
Copy !req
445. and he's a big
pain in the neck?
Copy !req
446. Don't tell me. Has a
big black mustache,
Copy !req
447. smokes a big
black cigar,
Copy !req
448. and is a big
pain in the...
Copy !req
449. Does he
wear glasses?
Copy !req
450. That's right.
You guess it quick.
Copy !req
451. Just for that, you don't get
the job I was gonna give you.
Copy !req
452. What job?
Secretary of War!
Copy !req
453. All right, I take it. Sold!
Copy !req
454. You know, I'd be lost
without a telephone.
Copy !req
455. Hey, don't go away,
I wanna talk to you.
Copy !req
456. Now, where were we? Oh, yes! Now
that you're Secretary of War,
Copy !req
457. what kind of an army
do you think we oughta have?
Copy !req
458. Well, I tell you
what I think.
Copy !req
459. I think we should
have a standing army.
Copy !req
460. Why should we
have a standing army?
Copy !req
461. Because then we save
money on chairs!
Copy !req
462. Peanuts!
Copy !req
463. Scat!
Copy !req
464. Say, who are
you anyway?
Copy !req
465. I don't go in much
for modern art.
Copy !req
466. Have you got anything by
one of the Old Masters?
Copy !req
467. Not bad.
Copy !req
468. You don't happen to have
her telephone number?
Copy !req
469. Say, you could be
a big help to me.
Copy !req
470. Where do you live?
Copy !req
471. Well, it's not much of a
place, but it's home.
Copy !req
472. Meow!
Copy !req
473. Well, I know one thing,
Copy !req
474. I bet you haven't got a
picture of my grandfather.
Copy !req
475. Uh-uh! Not now!
Copy !req
476. Some other time.
Copy !req
477. Your Excellency?
Copy !req
478. Quiet!
Copy !req
479. This letter's the
work of Trentino.
Copy !req
480. The man is trying
to undermine you.
Copy !req
481. Now, what are you
gonna do about it?
Copy !req
482. I've got a good mind to
ring his doorbell and run.
Copy !req
483. We've got to get rid of that man at once.
I've got a plan.
Copy !req
484. You say something to make him
mad and he'll strike you!
Copy !req
485. And we'll force him
to leave the country.
Copy !req
486. That's a swell plan. Why couldn't
you arrange for me to strike him?
Copy !req
487. Ambassador Trentino
is a very sensitive man.
Copy !req
488. Perhaps if you insult him.
He's very easy to insult.
Copy !req
489. Why, I said something to Vera Marcal in
his presence and he slapped my face.
Copy !req
490. Why didn't Vera
slap your face?
Copy !req
491. She did.
Copy !req
492. What'd you say to her?
Copy !req
493. You ought to be
ashamed of yourself.
Copy !req
494. Where'd you
hear that story?
Copy !req
495. You told it to me.
Copy !req
496. Oh, yes!
I remember.
Copy !req
497. I should've slapped Mrs. Teasdale's
face when she told it to me.
Copy !req
498. Where is Trentino?
Copy !req
499. At Mrs. Teasdale's
tea party.
Copy !req
500. Was I invited?
No.
Copy !req
501. Take a letter!
Copy !req
502. "You are cordially invited
to attend my tea party."
Copy !req
503. Sign Mrs. Teasdale's name
and tell her I accept.
Copy !req
504. Come on, let's go.
Copy !req
505. I've got an appointment to
insult Ambassador Trentino,
Copy !req
506. and I don't want to keep him waiting!
Step on it!
Copy !req
507. This is the fifth trip I've made today
and I haven't been anywhere yet.
Copy !req
508. You don't seem to be making much
progress with Mrs. Teasdale, huh?
Copy !req
509. How can I? Every time I get her in the
right mood to say "yes," Firefly pops in.
Copy !req
510. Well, this is your opportunity.
He won't be here today.
Copy !req
511. Are you sure?
Copy !req
512. Positive!
Copy !req
513. I helped Mrs. Teasdale
with the invitations.
Copy !req
514. Oh.
Copy !req
515. His Excellency,
Rufus T. Firefly!
Copy !req
516. Hail, hail Freedonia
Copy !req
517. Land of the
brave and free
Copy !req
518. Gloria, I waited
for years.
Copy !req
519. I can't be put off
any longer.
Copy !req
520. I love you, I want you! Can't
you see I'm at your feet?
Copy !req
521. When you get through with her
feet, you can start on mine.
Copy !req
522. If that isn't an insult,
I don't know what is.
Copy !req
523. Gloria, I love you. I
realize how lonely you are.
Copy !req
524. Can't we go someplace where
we can be by ourselves?
Copy !req
525. What can this mug offer you?
Wealth and family?
Copy !req
526. I can't give you wealth, but we can
have a little family of our own.
Copy !req
527. Oh, Rufus!
Copy !req
528. All I can offer you is a
roof-us over your head.
Copy !req
529. Your Excellency, I really
don't know what to say.
Copy !req
530. I wouldn't know what to say
either if I was in your place.
Copy !req
531. Maybe you can
suggest something.
Copy !req
532. As a matter of fact, you do suggest
something. To me you suggest a baboon.
Copy !req
533. What?
Copy !req
534. I'm sorry I said that. It isn't
fair to the rest of the baboons.
Copy !req
535. This man's conduct
is inexcusable!
Copy !req
536. Gentlemen! Gentlemen! I did
not come here to be insulted!
Copy !req
537. That's what you think.
You swine!
Copy !req
538. Come again?
You worm!
Copy !req
539. Once more.
You upstart!
Copy !req
540. That's it!
Copy !req
541. Touche!
Copy !req
542. Mrs. Teasdale, I'm afraid
this regrettable occurrence
Copy !req
543. may plunge our
countries into war.
Copy !req
544. Oh, this is terrible!
Copy !req
545. I've said enough.
I'm a man of few words.
Copy !req
546. I'm a man of
one word. Scram!
Copy !req
547. A man doesn't live who can
call a Firefly an upstart.
Copy !req
548. Why, the Mayflower was full of
Fireflys, and a few horseflies, too.
Copy !req
549. The Fireflys were
on the upper deck
Copy !req
550. and the horseflies
were on the Fireflys.
Copy !req
551. Good day, my sweet.
Copy !req
552. Oh, Your Excellency,
I must speak to you!
Copy !req
553. I'll see you at
the theater tonight.
Copy !req
554. I'll hold your seat
till you get there.
Copy !req
555. After you get there,
you're on your own.
Copy !req
556. His Excellency's car!
Copy !req
557. His Excellency's car!
Copy !req
558. No, no, you don't. I'm not
taking any more chances.
Copy !req
559. You can only fool
a Firefly twice.
Copy !req
560. This time you ride
in the sidecar.
Copy !req
561. This is the only
way to travel.
Copy !req
562. Hey, Pinky,
come here.
Copy !req
563. Watch the stand.
Copy !req
564. Come on, Pastrami,
come on.
Copy !req
565. Oh!
Copy !req
566. Huh.
Copy !req
567. Hey!
Hey, what's...
Copy !req
568. What's the matter?
Copy !req
569. Oh.
Copy !req
570. Mrs. Teasdale.
Copy !req
571. I deeply regret the unfortunate
affair with His Excellency,
Copy !req
572. but his attitude
left me no alternative.
Copy !req
573. Maybe we can still avoid
this terrible war.
Copy !req
574. Oh, if we only could.
Copy !req
575. Oh, yes, I do...
Ah.
Copy !req
576. Mrs. Teasdale, I have been
recalled by my president.
Copy !req
577. Then it's too late?
Copy !req
578. Not if His Excellency
will listen to reason.
Copy !req
579. I am prepared to pocket my pride and
forget about the whole matter if he is.
Copy !req
580. Ambassador, that's
wonderful of you,
Copy !req
581. but I'm afraid His
Excellency won't hear of it.
Copy !req
582. Oh, perhaps
he will listen to you.
Copy !req
583. Do you think so?
Copy !req
584. Yes, of course.
Copy !req
585. I'll call him.
Copy !req
586. I hate to disturb you,
Copy !req
587. I know you're
a very busy man,
Copy !req
588. but I must see you
at once.
Copy !req
589. Where are you? Oh.
Copy !req
590. Why not come over here? You can come
in the back way. No one will see you.
Copy !req
591. Well, if you think of it,
bring some cheese.
Copy !req
592. But, Your Excellency,
you must come over.
Copy !req
593. It's a long story. I can't
tell it to you over the phone.
Copy !req
594. Oh, it's that
kind of a story.
Copy !req
595. You ought to be ashamed
of yourself.
Copy !req
596. I'll be right over.
Copy !req
597. He'll be right over.
Copy !req
598. Perhaps you'd better wait outside until
I've had a chance to talk to him.
Copy !req
599. Very well, we'll be out
here if you want us.
Copy !req
600. Oh!
Copy !req
601. How'd you get in here?
Copy !req
602. Oh, Your Excellency, I'm so
sorry to have to disturb you.
Copy !req
603. Will you ever
forgive me?
Copy !req
604. After I leave here tonight,
will you ever forgive me?
Copy !req
605. Here are the plans of war.
Copy !req
606. They're as valuable
as your life
Copy !req
607. and that's putting them
pretty cheap.
Copy !req
608. Watch them like a cat
watches her kittens.
Copy !req
609. Have you ever
had kittens?
Copy !req
610. No, of course not. You're too busy
running around playing bridge.
Copy !req
611. Can't you see what I'm trying to tell you?
I love you.
Copy !req
612. Why don't you marry me?
Copy !req
613. Why, marry you?
Copy !req
614. You take me
and I'll take a vacation.
Copy !req
615. I'll need a vacation if
we're going to get married.
Copy !req
616. Married!
Copy !req
617. I can see you right now in the
kitchen, bending over a hot stove,
Copy !req
618. but I can't see the stove.
Copy !req
619. Come, come! Say the word and
you'll never see me again.
Copy !req
620. Gloria.
Copy !req
621. Rufus, what are
you thinking of?
Copy !req
622. Oh, I was just thinking of all the
years I've wasted collecting stamps.
Copy !req
623. Oh, I suppose you'll think
me a sentimental old fluff,
Copy !req
624. but would you mind giving
me a lock of your hair?
Copy !req
625. A lock of my hair?
Copy !req
626. Oh, I had no idea...
Copy !req
627. I'm letting
you off easy.
Copy !req
628. I was gonna ask
for the whole wig.
Copy !req
629. So, you've come to
ask for clemency?
Copy !req
630. Your Excellency, the Ambassador's
here on a friendly visit.
Copy !req
631. He's had a
change of heart.
Copy !req
632. A lot of good that'll do him.
He's still got the same face.
Copy !req
633. I'm sorry we
lost our tempers.
Copy !req
634. I'm willing to forget
if you are.
Copy !req
635. Forget? You ask
me to forget?
Copy !req
636. A Firefly
never forgets.
Copy !req
637. Why, my ancestors would
rise from their graves
Copy !req
638. and I'd only have
to bury them again.
Copy !req
639. Nothing doing.
Copy !req
640. I'm going back and clean the
crackers out of my bed.
Copy !req
641. I'm expecting company.
Copy !req
642. Please wait. Let go
of me, you bully!
Copy !req
643. I'm willing to do anything
to prevent this war.
Copy !req
644. It's too late. I've already paid a
month's rent on the battlefield.
Copy !req
645. Oh, Your Excellency,
Copy !req
646. isn't there something
I can do?
Copy !req
647. Yes, but I'll talk to
you about that later.
Copy !req
648. Won't you reconsider?
Copy !req
649. Please relent,
for my sake.
Copy !req
650. Well, maybe I am
a little headstrong,
Copy !req
651. but I come
by it honestly.
Copy !req
652. My father was
a little headstrong.
Copy !req
653. My mother was
a little armstrong.
Copy !req
654. The headstrongs
married the armstrongs
Copy !req
655. and that's why
darkies were born.
Copy !req
656. It was silly of me
to lose my temper,
Copy !req
657. on account of that little
thing you called me.
Copy !req
658. Little thing I called you?
What did I call you?
Copy !req
659. Gosh, I don't even
remember what it was.
Copy !req
660. Well, do you
mean "worm"?
Copy !req
661. No, that wasn't it.
Copy !req
662. I know, "swine."
Copy !req
663. Uh-uh. No, it was
a seven-letter word.
Copy !req
664. Oh, yes, "upstart"!
Copy !req
665. That's it. Upstart!
Copy !req
666. Mrs. Teasdale,
this man is impossible.
Copy !req
667. This is an outrage. My course is clear.
This means war!
Copy !req
668. Oh!
You runt!
Copy !req
669. I still like
upstart the best.
Copy !req
670. I shan't stay here
a minute longer.
Copy !req
671. Go and never darken
my towels again!
Copy !req
672. My hat!
Copy !req
673. My towel!
Oh!
Copy !req
674. I happen to know,
Copy !req
675. that Freedonia's plans of war are in Mrs.
Teasdale's possession.
Copy !req
676. I must get
hold of them.
Copy !req
677. Yes, but how?
Copy !req
678. We have a weekend guest
in Mrs. Teasdale's house.
Copy !req
679. Miss Marcal.
Copy !req
680. Now gentlemen, do you mind
waiting for me outside?
Copy !req
681. I'll join you
in a moment.
Copy !req
682. Excuse me.
Copy !req
683. Hello?
Copy !req
684. Yes, I am alone.
No, not yet.
Copy !req
685. But, Vera,
we've got to work fast.
Copy !req
686. You must get hold
of those plans tonight.
Copy !req
687. Chicolini and his partner
should be there any minute.
Copy !req
688. Do everything you can
to help them.
Copy !req
689. But I must be
very careful.
Copy !req
690. There is another guest
in here for the weekend.
Copy !req
691. Firefly.
Copy !req
692. I don't know.
I think he is asleep.
Copy !req
693. Ring the bell.
Copy !req
694. Push the button.
Copy !req
695. You got the plans?
Copy !req
696. No, but they're somewhere
in the house,
Copy !req
697. and you must
find them.
Copy !req
698. Oh, for heaven's sake, whatever
you do, don't make a sound.
Copy !req
699. If you're found,
you're lost.
Copy !req
700. Oh, you crazy, how can I
be lost if I'm found?
Copy !req
701. Got a flashlight?
Copy !req
702. You don't know
how serious this is.
Copy !req
703. If they catch you, you'll be
court-martialed and shot.
Copy !req
704. Oh, Vera!
Copy !req
705. I must go before
she looks for me.
Copy !req
706. Now remember, whatever you
do, don't make a sound.
Copy !req
707. You stay here,
but keep quiet.
Copy !req
708. Remember what she said,
if we get caught,
Copy !req
709. we're gonna get,
uh, court-plastered.
Copy !req
710. Your Excellency, I'm worried.
I can't sleep.
Copy !req
711. What?
Copy !req
712. You're worried?
You can't sleep?
Copy !req
713. That's fine, now you woke me up.
Now I can't sleep.
Copy !req
714. It's about those plans.
Copy !req
715. I won't rest until they're
back in your hands.
Copy !req
716. Won't you please come
over and get them?
Copy !req
717. Oh, the plans.
Okay, I'll be right over.
Copy !req
718. Let me out!
Let me out!
Copy !req
719. Let me
outta here!
Copy !req
720. Hey, let me outta here
or throw me a magazine.
Copy !req
721. So that's
your game, eh?
Copy !req
722. I'll huff and I'll puff
and I'll blow your door in.
Copy !req
723. Come in.
Copy !req
724. Oh, Your Excellency,
I'm so glad you've come.
Copy !req
725. I'm glad I come, too.
Copy !req
726. You got the plans?
Copy !req
727. Why, Your Excellency,
you sound so strange.
Copy !req
728. Why are you
talking like that?
Copy !req
729. Oh, well, you see, maybe some time I go
to Italy and I'm practicing the language.
Copy !req
730. I'll see my lawyer about this as soon
as he graduates from law school.
Copy !req
731. Your dialect
is perfect.
Copy !req
732. I could listen
to you all night.
Copy !req
733. That's all right, but I
can't stay here all night.
Copy !req
734. Where's the plans?
Copy !req
735. They're in the safe
downstairs.
Copy !req
736. I'll write out
the combination.
Copy !req
737. Oh, there you are.
Copy !req
738. Here's the combination.
Copy !req
739. Is that clear?
Copy !req
740. Is there anything else
you want to know?
Copy !req
741. What's the matter with you?
Have you lost your voice?
Copy !req
742. Let me get you a glass of
water, Your Excellency.
Copy !req
743. Your Excellency,
here's your water.
Copy !req
744. What in the world
is the matter with you?
Copy !req
745. Your Excellency!
I thought you left.
Copy !req
746. Oh, no,
I no leave.
Copy !req
747. But I saw you
with my own eyes.
Copy !req
748. Well, who you gonna believe,
me or your own eyes?
Copy !req
749. Oh.
Copy !req
750. Your Excellency, I'm sorry, but
this excitement's too much for me.
Copy !req
751. I feel faint.
Copy !req
752. Wait, I get you
a glass of water.
Copy !req
753. How about my
glass of water?
Copy !req
754. I give up. How about
your glass of water?
Copy !req
755. What's that?
Copy !req
756. Sounds to me like mice.
Copy !req
757. Mice? Mice
don't play music.
Copy !req
758. No? How about
the old maestro?
Copy !req
759. Oh.
Copy !req
760. Get me headquarters.
Copy !req
761. Not hindquarters,
headquarters.
Copy !req
762. Hello?
Copy !req
763. Rush the guards right
over to Mrs. Teasdale's
Copy !req
764. and have them
surround the house.
Copy !req
765. His Excellency,
Rufus T. Firefly.
Copy !req
766. Hail, hail Freedonia
Copy !req
767. Land of the brave
and free
Copy !req
768. Lieutenant!
Copy !req
769. Why weren't the original indictment
papers placed on my portfolio?
Copy !req
770. Why, uh, I didn't
think those papers
Copy !req
771. were important at this
time, Your Excellency.
Copy !req
772. You didn't think
they were important?
Copy !req
773. You realize I had my dessert
wrapped in those papers?
Copy !req
774. Here, take this bottle back
and get two cents for it.
Copy !req
775. Hello, boss.
Copy !req
776. Chicolini, I bet you eight
to one, we find you guilty.
Copy !req
777. That's a no good. I can get
10 to one at the barbershop.
Copy !req
778. Chicolini, you're charged
with high treason.
Copy !req
779. And if found guilty,
you'll be shot.
Copy !req
780. I object.
Oh, you object.
Copy !req
781. On what grounds?
Copy !req
782. I couldn't think of
anything else to say.
Copy !req
783. Objection sustained.
Copy !req
784. Your Excellency, you
sustained the objection?
Copy !req
785. Sure, I couldn't think of
anything else to say either.
Copy !req
786. Why don't you object?
Copy !req
787. Chicolini, when
were you born?
Copy !req
788. I don't remember.
Copy !req
789. I was just
a little baby.
Copy !req
790. Isn't it true you tried to sell
Freedonia's secret war code and plans?
Copy !req
791. Sure, I sold a code
and two pair of plans.
Copy !req
792. It's some joke,
eh, boss?
Copy !req
793. Now I'll bet you 20 to one
we find you guilty.
Copy !req
794. Chicolini, have you anyone
here to defend you?
Copy !req
795. It's no use.
Copy !req
796. I even offered to pay
as high as $18,
Copy !req
797. but I no could get
somebody to defend me.
Copy !req
798. My friends, this man's
case moves me deeply.
Copy !req
799. Look at Chicolini,
Copy !req
800. he sits there alone.
Copy !req
801. An abject figure.
Copy !req
802. I abject!
Copy !req
803. I say, look at Chicolini,
he sits there alone,
Copy !req
804. a pitiable object.
Copy !req
805. Let's see you
get out of that one.
Copy !req
806. Surrounded by a sea
of unfriendly faces.
Copy !req
807. Chicolini, give me a
number from one to 10.
Copy !req
808. Eleven.
Right!
Copy !req
809. Now I ask you one.
Copy !req
810. What is it has a trunk,
but no key,
Copy !req
811. weighs 2,000 pounds
and lives in a circus?
Copy !req
812. That's irrelevant.
Copy !req
813. Irrelephant?
Hey, that's the answer.
Copy !req
814. There's a whole lot of
irrelephants in a circus.
Copy !req
815. That sort of testimony
we can eliminate.
Copy !req
816. That's fine,
I'll take some.
Copy !req
817. You'll take what?
Copy !req
818. A lemonade, a nice,
cold glass of lemonade.
Copy !req
819. Hey, boss,
I'm going good.
Copy !req
820. Gentlemen, Chicolini here
may talk like an idiot
Copy !req
821. and look like an idiot.
Copy !req
822. But don't let
that fool you.
Copy !req
823. He really is an idiot.
Copy !req
824. I implore you,
Copy !req
825. send him back to his
father and brothers
Copy !req
826. who are waiting for him with
open arms in the penitentiary.
Copy !req
827. I suggest that we give him 10 years in
Leavenworth or 11 years in Twelveworth.
Copy !req
828. I tell you what I'll do.
Copy !req
829. I'll take five and 10
in Woolworth.
Copy !req
830. I wanted to get a writ
of habeas corpus,
Copy !req
831. but I should have gotten
rid of you instead.
Copy !req
832. I object.
Even I object.
Copy !req
833. Then I object, too.
Copy !req
834. You're on trial,
you can't object.
Copy !req
835. Your Excellency,
Copy !req
836. General Cooper says that
the Sylvanian troops
Copy !req
837. are about to land
on Freedonian soil.
Copy !req
838. This means war.
Copy !req
839. Something
must be done.
Copy !req
840. War would mean a prohibitive
increase in our taxes.
Copy !req
841. Hey, I got an uncle
lives in Texas.
Copy !req
842. No, I'm talking about
taxes, money, dollars.
Copy !req
843. Dallas! That's where my
uncle lives, Dallas, Texas!
Copy !req
844. More bad news.
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845. Didn't I tell you?
Copy !req
846. Your Excellency.
Copy !req
847. What's on your
mind, babe?
Copy !req
848. In behalf of the women
of Freedonia,
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849. I have taken it upon myself to make
one final effort to prevent war.
Copy !req
850. No kidding?
Copy !req
851. I've talked to
Ambassador Trentino,
Copy !req
852. and he says Sylvania
doesn't want war either.
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853. Either.
Doesn't want war either.
Copy !req
854. Either.
Copy !req
855. Skip it.
Copy !req
856. I've taken the liberty of asking
the Ambassador to come over here.
Copy !req
857. Because we both felt that a friendly
conference would settle everything peacefully.
Copy !req
858. He'll be here
any moment.
Copy !req
859. Mrs. Teasdale,
you did a noble deed.
Copy !req
860. I'd be unworthy of the high
trust that's been placed in me
Copy !req
861. if I didn't do everything
within my power
Copy !req
862. to keep our beloved Freedonia
at peace with the world.
Copy !req
863. I'd be only too happy to
meet Ambassador Trentino
Copy !req
864. and offer him on
behalf of my country
Copy !req
865. the right hand
of good fellowship.
Copy !req
866. And I feel sure that he
will accept this gesture
Copy !req
867. in the spirit
in which it is offered.
Copy !req
868. But suppose
he doesn't.
Copy !req
869. A fine thing
that'll be.
Copy !req
870. I hold out my hand and
he refuses to accept it.
Copy !req
871. That'll add a lot to
my prestige, won't it?
Copy !req
872. Me, the head of a country,
snubbed by a foreign ambassador.
Copy !req
873. Who does he
think he is
Copy !req
874. that he can come here and make a sap
out of me in front of all my people?
Copy !req
875. Think of it.
I hold out my hand
Copy !req
876. and that hyena
refuses to accept it.
Copy !req
877. Why the cheap
four-flushing swine.
Copy !req
878. He'll never get away
with it, I tell you.
Copy !req
879. He'll never get away with it!
Oh, please!
Copy !req
880. So, you refuse to shake
hands with me, eh? Oh!
Copy !req
881. Mrs. Teasdale, this is the last straw.
There's no turning back now!
Copy !req
882. This means war!
Copy !req
883. Then it's war!
Copy !req
884. Then it's war!
Gather the forces!
Copy !req
885. Harness the horses!
Copy !req
886. Then it's war!
Copy !req
887. Freedonia's going to war
Copy !req
888. Each native son
will grab a gun
Copy !req
889. And run away to war
Copy !req
890. At last we're going to...
Copy !req
891. Feet will beat along
the street to war
Copy !req
892. We're going to war
Copy !req
893. At last our country's
going to war
Copy !req
894. It seems our country's
going to war
Copy !req
895. At last the country's
going to war
Copy !req
896. We're going to war
Copy !req
897. This is a fact
we can't ignore
Copy !req
898. We're going to war
Copy !req
899. This is a fact
we can't ignore
Copy !req
900. We're going to war
Copy !req
901. In case you haven't
heard before
Copy !req
902. I think they think
we're going to war
Copy !req
903. I think they think
we're going to war
Copy !req
904. We're going to war
Copy !req
905. I think they think
we're going to war
Copy !req
906. We're going to war
Copy !req
907. We're going to war
Copy !req
908. We're going to war
Copy !req
909. We're going to war
Copy !req
910. To war, to war
We're finally going to war
Copy !req
911. Oh, hi-de, hi-de, hi-de,
hi-de, hi-de, hi-de, ho
Copy !req
912. To war, to war
To war we're gonna go
Copy !req
913. Oh, hi-de, hi-de, hi-de,
hi-de, hi-de, hi-de, ho
Copy !req
914. Oh, hi-de, hi-de, hi-de,
hi-de, hi-de, hi-de, ho
Copy !req
915. Oh, hi-de, hi-de, hi-de,
hi-de, hi-de, hi-de, ho
Copy !req
916. Oh, hi-de, hi-de, hi-de,
hi-de, hi-de, hi-de, ho
Copy !req
917. Oh-ho, oh-ho, oh-ho
Copy !req
918. Oh-ho, oh-ho, oh-ho
Copy !req
919. Oh-ho
Copy !req
920. Oh-ho
Copy !req
921. Oh-ho
Copy !req
922. They got guns
Copy !req
923. We got guns
Copy !req
924. All God's children got guns
Copy !req
925. We're gonna walk
all over the battlefield
Copy !req
926. 'Cause all God's
children got guns
Copy !req
927. Oh, Freedonia
Oh, don't you cry for me
Copy !req
928. 'Cause I'm coming 'round the
mountain with a banjo on my knee
Copy !req
929. Oh, Freedonia
Oh, don't you cry for me
Copy !req
930. 'Cause I'm coming
'round the mountain
Copy !req
931. With a banjo
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932. On my
Copy !req
933. Knee
Copy !req
934. To war, to war
To war we're gonna go
Copy !req
935. To war, to war, to war
Copy !req
936. To war, to war
We soon will say goodbye
Copy !req
937. Oh, how we'd cry for Firefly
if Firefly should die
Copy !req
938. A mighty man is he
Copy !req
939. A man of brawn who'll carry
on till dawn of victory
Copy !req
940. With him to lead the way
our spirits will not lag
Copy !req
941. Until the Judgment Day
we'll rally round the flag
Copy !req
942. The flag, the flag,
the flag
Copy !req
943. The enemy
is coming!
Copy !req
944. There'll be two lamps in the
steeple if they're coming by land
Copy !req
945. and one if they're
coming by sea.
Copy !req
946. They double-crossed me. They're
coming by land and sea.
Copy !req
947. Ride through every
village and town!
Copy !req
948. Wake every citizen
uphill and down!
Copy !req
949. Tell them the enemy
comes from afar.
Copy !req
950. With a hey-nonny-nonny
and a ha-cha-cha
Copy !req
951. Be off, my lad!
Copy !req
952. My husband! Quickly!
Hide in there.
Copy !req
953. Oh, don't.
Copy !req
954. Freedonia's
going to war.
Copy !req
955. I'm gonna
take a bath.
Copy !req
956. Clear all wires.
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957. The enemy has captured
Hill 27 and 28.
Copy !req
958. Throwing 13 hillbillies
out of work.
Copy !req
959. Last night, two snipers crept into our
machine gun nest and laid an egg.
Copy !req
960. Send reinforcements
immediately.
Copy !req
961. Send that off collect.
Copy !req
962. Your Excellency, our men are being
badly beaten in open warfare.
Copy !req
963. I suggest we dig trenches.
Copy !req
964. Dig trenches with our men
being killed off like flies?
Copy !req
965. There isn't time
to dig trenches.
Copy !req
966. We'll buy ready-made. Here, run
out and get some trenches.
Copy !req
967. Yes, sir.
Wait a minute,
Copy !req
968. get them this high and our
soldiers won't need any pants.
Copy !req
969. Yes, sir.
Wait a minute,
Copy !req
970. get them this high and we
won't need any soldiers.
Copy !req
971. Yes, sir.
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972. Chicolini, your partner's deserted
us, but I'm still counting on you.
Copy !req
973. There's a machine gun nest near Hill 28.
I want it cleaned out.
Copy !req
974. All right,
I'll tell the janitor.
Copy !req
975. Message from
the front, sir.
Copy !req
976. Oh, I'm sick of messages
from the front.
Copy !req
977. Don't we ever get a
message from the side?
Copy !req
978. What is it? General Smith
reports a gas attack.
Copy !req
979. He wants to know
what to do.
Copy !req
980. Tell him to take a teaspoonful
of bicarbonate soda
Copy !req
981. and a half
a glass of water.
Copy !req
982. Yes, sir.
Copy !req
983. Any answer to that message?
No, sir.
Copy !req
984. Well, in that case,
don't send that.
Copy !req
985. Gentlemen, this is
the last straw.
Copy !req
986. Where's my Stradivarius?
Here, sir.
Copy !req
987. I'll show them they can't
fiddle around with old Firefly.
Copy !req
988. Look at them run. Now they
know they've been in a war.
Copy !req
989. Your Excellency!
Copy !req
990. They're fleeing
like rats.
Copy !req
991. But, sir,
I've got to tell...
Copy !req
992. Remind me to give myself
the Firefly Medal for this.
Copy !req
993. Your Excellency, you're
shooting your own men.
Copy !req
994. What? You're shooting
your own men!
Copy !req
995. Here's $5.
Keep it under your hat.
Copy !req
996. Never mind. I'll keep
it under my hat.
Copy !req
997. Now we've got to have
more men or we're lost.
Copy !req
998. Don't be alarmed, I've got a man combing
the countryside for volunteers.
Copy !req
999. Your Excellency, the army's morale is
crumbling. The men are breaking ranks.
Copy !req
1000. Where's the
Secretary of War?
Copy !req
1001. That's it! Where is
the Secretary of War?
Copy !req
1002. The soldiers are
waiting for his orders.
Copy !req
1003. His Excellency,
the Secretary of War.
Copy !req
1004. Awfully decent of you
to drop in today.
Copy !req
1005. You realize our army is
facing disastrous defeat?
Copy !req
1006. What do you intend to do about it?
I've done it already.
Copy !req
1007. You've done what? I've
changed to the other side.
Copy !req
1008. So you're on the
other side, eh?
Copy !req
1009. Well, what are you
doing over here?
Copy !req
1010. Well, the food is
better over here.
Copy !req
1011. Chicolini, I need you
badly right now.
Copy !req
1012. What'll you take to come
back and work for me again?
Copy !req
1013. I'll take a vacation.
Copy !req
1014. Good, you're hired.
Copy !req
1015. Now, go out in that battlefield
and lead those men to victory.
Copy !req
1016. Go on, they're
waiting for you.
Copy !req
1017. I wouldn't go out there unless I was
in one of those big iron things
Copy !req
1018. that go up and down like this.
What do you call those things?
Copy !req
1019. Tanks.
You're welcome.
Copy !req
1020. Your Excellency, you must
come over here at once.
Copy !req
1021. There's danger here.
Copy !req
1022. Why don't you come over here?
There's no danger here.
Copy !req
1023. Shh!
Rufus.
Copy !req
1024. Oh!
Copy !req
1025. Wait a minute, I want
to find out something.
Copy !req
1026. Just as I thought,
the coast is clear.
Copy !req
1027. Rufus!
Copy !req
1028. Chicolini, to your post!
Copy !req
1029. Oh!
Copy !req
1030. Remember, you're fighting
for this woman's honor
Copy !req
1031. which is probably
more than she ever did.
Copy !req
1032. Your Excellency!
Copy !req
1033. There goes my gun. Run out and
get that like a good girl.
Copy !req
1034. Oh, I'm afraid!
Copy !req
1035. We can't last
much longer.
Copy !req
1036. Our ammunition supplies
are very low.
Copy !req
1037. Man the boats, Lieutenant!
I'll get help.
Copy !req
1038. Calling all nations!
Calling all nations!
Copy !req
1039. This is Rufus T...
Copy !req
1040. This is Rufus T. Firefly, coming to you
through the courtesy of the enemy.
Copy !req
1041. We're in a mess, folks!
We're in a mess!
Copy !req
1042. Rush to Freedonia. Three men and one
woman are trapped in a building.
Copy !req
1043. Send help at once.
Copy !req
1044. If you can't send help,
send two more women.
Copy !req
1045. Make it three more women.
Copy !req
1046. Your Excellency, we can't hold out
much longer. We must have help.
Copy !req
1047. One of us has got to
break through the lines
Copy !req
1048. and get word to General
Cooper and his men.
Copy !req
1049. Quiet back there!
Copy !req
1050. Which one of us is gonna
have the rare privilege
Copy !req
1051. of sacrificing his life
for his country?
Copy !req
1052. We draw lots.
Wait! I got it.
Copy !req
1053. Ringspot! Vonza, twoza, zig-zag-zav,
popti, vinaga, tin-li-tav.
Copy !req
1054. Harem-scarem, merchan-tarem,
teir, tore...
Copy !req
1055. I did it wrong. Wait,
wait, wait, I start here.
Copy !req
1056. Ringspot! Vonza, twoza, zig-zag-zav,
popti, vinaga, tin-li-tav.
Copy !req
1057. Harem-scarem, merchan-tarem,
teir, tore...
Copy !req
1058. That's no good, too.
Copy !req
1059. Oh, I got it.
I got it.
Copy !req
1060. Ringspot! Buck!
Copy !req
1061. You're a brave man. Go and
break through the lines!
Copy !req
1062. And remember, while you're out there risking
life and limb through shot and shell,
Copy !req
1063. we'll be in here thinking
what a sucker you are.
Copy !req
1064. Goodbye, Mont Blanc,
goodbye.
Copy !req
1065. For Freedonia!
For Freedonia!
Copy !req
1066. For Freedonia!
Copy !req
1067. Gloria! Gloria!
Copy !req
1068. Where did they get you?
Copy !req
1069. Oh!
Copy !req
1070. Hey, careful with the water.
It's the only water we got.
Copy !req
1071. Well, it's the only
woman we got.
Copy !req
1072. We're surrounded! They're
attacking from the rear.
Copy !req
1073. They're coming this way.
Copy !req
1074. We'll barricade the door.
Copy !req
1075. This is Firefly talking!
Send help at once!
Copy !req
1076. Help is on the way!
Copy !req
1077. Carry on, men!
Help is on the way!
Copy !req
1078. They got me.
Copy !req
1079. They got me.
Copy !req
1080. Water!
Copy !req
1081. Water!
Copy !req
1082. - Get me out of this!
- Get me out of this!
Copy !req
1083. The last time this happened to
me I was crawling under a bed.
Copy !req
1084. Oh, if help
would only come.
Copy !req
1085. Your Excellency!
Copy !req
1086. Any mail for me
while I was gone?
Copy !req
1087. Oh, don't touch me!
Get away from me!
Copy !req
1088. Oh!
Copy !req
1089. Oh!
Copy !req
1090. Hey, Trentino!
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1091. Trentino, eh?
That's game.
Copy !req
1092. Trentino!
Trentino, eh?
Copy !req
1093. Call me an upstart, eh?
Copy !req
1094. I surrender! I surrender!
Copy !req
1095. I'm sorry, you'll have to wait
until the fruit runs out.
Copy !req
1096. Victory is ours!
Copy !req
1097. Hail, hail Freedonia
Copy !req
1098. Land of the brave
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