1. Robbery suspect located. Unit PT6 heading
for lower city level...
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2. Get away from me!
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3. Leave me alone!
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4. This is the police.
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5. Stay where you are, and
toss your weapon aside.
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6. - Get away from me!
- THIS is you final warning.
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7. stop where you are...
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8. - Drop dead!
- ... is you final warning.
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9. There is no escape.
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10. - Stop or we will ruin you.
- away from me!
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11. Stop. Stop.
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12. Shit.
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13. Oh my God, oh my God...
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14. I'm so ANGRY with my life!
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15. We got him trapped down in
the laundromat. But I do not see a thing.
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16. According to the building plan, he's only got
one exit out of here.
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17. All you kids, to the right!
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18. - Do not .. do not scream!
- Muuum!
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19. Lady! Quiet!
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20. I'm gonna my foot, see if he's got
anybody else down there.
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21. Back off!
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22. Or I kill the fat lady!
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23. I mean it!
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24. Try anything!
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25. Get these damn fuckers all over the place!
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26. Please, rat, why don't you pick on
somebody your own size!
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27. Ahh, sshhut up!
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28. Hey, Cuartez...
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29. we got ourselves a biiig problem down here.
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30. I bespeak further ten million mineral bricks and safe
passage out this universe as we know it.
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31. The son of a bitch is even crazier
than we thought,
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32. if he thinks we're gonna give him
any of these things.
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33. Is exactly what we're
going to do, Captain Skyresh.
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34. I want the situation resolved now.
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35. Give him what he wants and get rid of him.
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36. Elections are next week and I don't need dead
fat ladies on video screens all over the city.
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37. Get it, Mr. Mayor.
Just got a better idea.
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38. Brick Bardo just showed up.
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39. Bardo? I just said I don't want a bloodbath.
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40. I'm ordering you to meet his demands.
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41. Mayor?
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42. Sorry, um... there is a trouble with
the phone here. Gotta go.
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43. Skyresh... Skyresh! Skyr...
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44. Brick, what are you doing here?
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45. Good to see YOU.
Hell of a mess.
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46. Got in there over thirteen hostages.
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47. The mayor wants to give in.
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48. I'm suspended, remember?
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49. Yeah. But, um...
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50. - you've got any ideas?
- I've got an idea.
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51. Gonna use hot water for my whites...
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52. use a cold wash and more rinser
for the colors.
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53. What are you talking about?
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54. Laundry, Captain.
This is what I'm doing.
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55. Excuse me.
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56. So Brick can take over?
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57. Yeah.
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58. Right.
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59. One... Two...
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60. - Three...
- Hey asshole!
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61. What the fuck you think you're doing?
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62. I'm gonna kill these fat ladies!
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63. Hey, I am talking to you, sh-shitbrain!
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64. Somebody...
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65. better... kick this moron out of here...
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66. or the FAT is going to hit the!
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67. That's right.
One of us gonna get goin'.
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68. But I already put my money in the machine.
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69. I swear. I am going to do it.
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70. Wow! That's the Ruger Blaster,
the most powerful handgun in the Universe!
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71. That's right, fat boy.
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72. And it's gonna blow a hole
clean through this fat lady.
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73. And then blow a hole out of you.
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74. And that's gonna blow a hole
outta lady behind you.
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75. It's gonna be a lot of guts
floating around the laundromat.
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76. Do you know what I mean...
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77. fat boy?
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78. What the hell happened to you?
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79. Two women in cardiac arrest?
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80. Everything is under control.
The suspect is in custody.
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81. And every news station in town
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82. is reporting that one of my officers
endangered a laundromat full of hostages.
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83. Think how that looks!
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84. - Mayor, no one was killed and I thought
that Bardo here...
- I'll do the thinking, Captain!
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85. Where is that son of a bitch now?
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86. Disappointed you didn't get
to kill anyone tonight, Bardo?
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87. You are through!
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88. YOU GODDAMN PSYCHO!
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89. Take off those sunglasses, it's night!
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90. - I want that bastard suspended!
- He is already under suspension because of
the incident in Fillmore.
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91. Then fire his ass, I want him done!
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92. Thank you for saving my Mom.
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93. Tonight, at 11.68, there was a extreme shootout
in a South Central laundromat.
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94. Unidentified sources at the crime scene claim
that a renegade ex-cop went on a shooting rampage
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95. that has left an unconfirmed 27 bystanders
wounded and another 3.6 dead.
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96. With more on this tragic story
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97. Details are still sketchy at this point, Harry.
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98. However, anonymous official has heard rumor
that 1.4 of the dead are indeed children.
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99. The Mayor's office has released
no actual details at this time.
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100. However, a highly placed authority has implied
the identity of the killer to be known:
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101. The name 'Brick Bardo' was overheard.
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102. Brick Bardo is a detective that was involved
in the Fillmore incident earlier this year.
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103. - That's right, Harry -
- We've come back...
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104. But first: we've got a travel advice...
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105. There's an old friend...
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106. Wants to see you, Bard.
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107. Rise and shine.
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108. I saw the news tonight.
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109. You're a VERY violent man, Bardo.
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110. Yes, I know.
It's a violent universe.
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111. I bet you thought you'd seen the last of me.
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112. I am seeing the last of you, Sprug.
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113. After our last encounter,
this is all they managed to salvage.
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114. Let's see if I'd remember the first time.
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115. Countman bank job?
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116. - I flew off your left arm.
- And most of my left foot.
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117. And then there was the Space Extortion.
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118. What did I take?
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119. Two... or three legs?
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120. Among other things.
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121. The last time,
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122. All I remember was your head,
rolling around in the parking lot.
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123. I didn't think it was enough to save.
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124. The modern medicine.
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125. They doing some wonderful things.
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126. It's too bad your lovely family couldn't
benefit as I had.
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127. Then I think, even our best doctors couldn't
have done anything with what was left of them.
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128. What do you want?
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129. I'll tell you what I want, Bardo.
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130. 50000 molecular ions.
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131. And I get them too, you know why?
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132. Because my cruiser is loaded with
a dimensional fusion bomb,
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133. that will blow the of this city
into another universe.
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134. It will never happen.
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135. Why not?
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136. Somehow you'll fuck it up.
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137. You always fuck it up.
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138. No, Bardo.
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139. You've always screwed up my plans.
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140. But this time you don't have a chance,
because you gonna be it tiny, tiny little atoms.
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141. I'll gonna blow you apart,
piece by piece, Bardo.
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142. It's mine now.
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143. I've heard about this custom-made monster
for years.
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144. Do not worry, Bardo.
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145. I'll take good care of him.
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146. And I'll put it to good use.
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147. Start with his left hand.
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148. How does it feel to be on the other side, Bardo?
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149. I don't know. You tell me.
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150. I'm gonna die.
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151. You can't kill me anymore.
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152. What do you want, asshole?
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153. Nothing.
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154. You just gonna walk away?
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155. Warning. Intruder is. Closing fast.
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156. Your crap won't take the pressure.
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157. Neither will yours.
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158. Damn!
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159. I don't give a fuck.
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160. What makes you think I do?
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161. Energy Band impact.
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162. you have landed on an alien planet.
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163. Air pressure and atmosphere
compatible to human life.
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164. Warning based on sensor calculations
of planet's structures
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165. Your size relationships are altered: this
planet's life forms are in ratio of 6:1 larger
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166. - Hey, you in the wrong neighborhood?
- bucks!
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167. Don't you be selling that trash
in my neighborhood!
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168. That's it! I'm tired with you sleazy motherfucking
dope dealers selling shit in my neighborhood!
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169. Now fucking move or I fucking kick your ass!
Get the fucking move or I fucking kick your ass!
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170. Do you want me to fucking kill you?
Get out of here!
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171. Don't fucking come back! Move it!
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172. Go, take this shit with you!
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173. Get the fucking out of here!
Go! Beat it! Scumbag!
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174. That's why you have joined our
Neighborhood Watch program.
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175. Today we have a very special guest,
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176. who will explain to us how the police
plan to help us in our fight.
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177. Please welcome Captain Arnold Schuller,
police commissioner.
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178. - Thanks for coming.
- Glad to be here.
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179. Mrs. Alejandro is absolutely right.
We are involved in a war.
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180. And if it weren't for you, people,
we would have no chance of winning.
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181. I think you are the ones who
deserve my applause.
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182. Now that you have your sound-by, Captain Schuller, you
can go ahead and tell us exactly how you plan to help us.
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183. What do you have in mind? Beefed-up patrols?
Raiding the crack houses? Roadblocks?
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184. Oh that's not as simple as that.
You know, it's a very big city.
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185. And Dalton Avenue is not the only area that needs help.
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186. Look...
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187. you are the police.
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188. Protect and serve. It's your job.
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189. Protect us!
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190. Of course I will protect you, Mrs. Alejandro.
We will always try to protect you.
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191. Together we can win this war.
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192. There's the bitch that's keepin' up
to mess with our business, huh?
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193. Get off me!
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194. Get right...
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195. You fuck with our business...
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196. You die.
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197. GET OFF ME!
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198. Kill that bitch!
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199. Kill the whore!
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200. Drop the weapons down.
Step away from the girl!
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201. Shhhit! Giants!
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202. That's for the giants, I hate giants!
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203. - I did not mean to scare you.
- Scare me?
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204. Who are you?
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205. What am I to worry about,
this is just a bad dream.
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206. I must be in shock...
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207. or I am hallucinating...
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208. or... I have a concussion?
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209. You're SO small.
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210. We can't stay here, they'll be back.
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211. Those punks?
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212. I don't think so.
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213. They'll bring their whole gang.
We got to get out of here.
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214. I'm not going anywhere.
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215. Stop it. Stop it. Hey! Stop!
Fuckin' Giants!
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216. Look! A head, on the road!
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217. - Where?
- No, no. That's human head, look!
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218. The fuck is that, man?
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219. - Fuck is that?
- Look, my friends...
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220. let's cut to the case.
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221. I am obviously a visitor from another ff... world,
who has had a bit of... trouble!
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222. You help me out... I'll help you out.
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223. It fuckin' talks!
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224. We gonna help you do what?
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225. Conquer your world...
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226. such as it is.
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227. I've... got a bomb you could use.
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228. Some thing that will rip your dimension
a new asshole.
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229. Rip my dimension?
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230. Believe me, nobody will fuck with you.
Ever again!
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231. With a bomb like that we could, like,
blow up the entire East-Side.
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232. We could take all fucking burrow! Huh?
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233. This place could be mine!
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234. Whatever was left behind, yes...
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235. would be... yours.
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236. Do we have a deal?
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237. Well... what do you want?
Like, um... a new hat or something?
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238. Move the bomb... off the ship.
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239. Kevin, it's your Mom!
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240. What's the secret password?
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241. Kevin, open the door.
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242. Hurry up!
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243. - Hey-hey-hey...
- Bronco Spacestar! - Oi...
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244. Kevin, no!
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245. Put me down!
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246. Kevin, no. Kevin, NO!
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247. - Shit!
- VOW!
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248. now!
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249. Sorry.
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250. - Are you alright?
- Never felt better in my life.
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251. Um.. my son thought you were a toy.
Bronco Spacestar is his favorite TV show.
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252. What is it, Mom?
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253. It's... a little man, Kevin.
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254. So, ahh... where did you come from?
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255. How did you get here?
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256. The last thing I remember I was chasing...
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257. Sprug, into the Energy Bands.
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258. Energy bands?
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259. Mom! He's an alien.
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260. Alien? No.
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261. What planet do you come from? Mars?
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262. - Venus?
- Arturos.
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263. - Arturo? Of course!
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264. Honey, he's not an alien.
He-he is a small man who g... got lost.
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265. - Vow!
- Jesus! - Vow!
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266. I want one of those, Mom.
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267. Give me that gun.
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268. - No way.
- Give me the gun!
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269. I will not have guns in my house!
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270. Alright. Don't pull that thing out again.
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271. When will this nightmare be over?
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272. It's not a nightmare.
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273. Then what the hell is it?
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274. It's the South Bronx.
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275. - How are we doing?
- Eh, the rich get richer, Braxton.
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276. That's the plan.
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277. What the fuck is this?
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278. I don't think you told of this...
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279. Oh fuck, man...
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280. The fucking pool table!
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281. - It's ruined!
- Who put it on the goddamn pool table? Huh?
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282. You didn't just wipe the blood out of
goddamn?
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283. Hey, it wasn't my fault. It was this fault!
It was because of Debi!
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284. Thought I told you not to fuck with Debi.
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285. Hey, she was gone fucking with us.
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286. We were just trying to protected ourselves, jefe!
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287. She did this to you?
What, do you expect me to believe that?
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288. She had this... this little doll...
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289. A little by-man.
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290. What the fuck are you talking about?
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291. Well, this guy, this little guy who just jumped
out, man - and started shooting everybody!
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292. - He burned the Hector's.
- You tell me a midget did this to you?
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293. No, it was no midget, pendejo via!
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294. - A little guy, like this much.
- Take another fucking drink, Jackson.
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295. - You shut the fuck up, I'm trying to think!
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296. Fuck, what you made me do?
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297. See, that's what happens when people start
taking things upon themselves!
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298. Anybody else got any bright ideas?
You got a fucking bright ideas, huh?
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299. What about you, you got a bright idea? HUH?
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300. I have an idea.
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301. It's not his little voice.
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302. This better be good head.
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303. There is only one person who can stop you
once I give you the dimensional bomb.
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304. Brick Bardo.
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305. What's a Brick Bardo?
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306. It's an asshole cop from my world.
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307. He followed me here.
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308. Well, how do you know it's him?
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309. There is only one weapon in the universe
that can destroy atomic matter like that.
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310. It's dangerous to me...
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311. and to you too.
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312. If I were you, I'd go out and kill him right now.
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313. Oh yeah? Well, if I was you, I'd quit
while I was a head.
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314. Take how it looks?
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315. That guy moves into your territory,
blows away your two men?
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316. I know, I would not like it,
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317. He is not showing you proper respect.
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318. People would think you've lost control.
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319. this guy is a cop, huh?
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320. Yeah.
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321. I'm gonna go to Debi's.
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322. I'm gonna show this cop is
wrong fucking neighbourhood.
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323. You stay here and clean up this mess.
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324. And give a fucking brain something to eat.
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325. No fucking shit, asshole.
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326. Get this fucking body out of here!
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327. Mister, are you sure you know
what you are doing?
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328. Isn't it past your bedtime, kid?
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329. No power, that's your problem, Mister.
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330. No, kiddo.
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331. What size batteries does this thing take?
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332. Look, kid, I'm a little busy right now, so...
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333. get the hell away from me, huh?
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334. Are all people on your planet assholes like you?
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335. Sometimes.
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336. Hey, I know somebody that can help you.
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337. The show is over. Good night.
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338. Get out of my apartment.
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339. Come on, out, out!
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340. Señora, fuera, fuera permento!
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341. What are you kids, deaf? Go, get out! Now!
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342. Kevin, I want to talk to you.
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343. Goodnight! Goodbye!
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344. Hello, get OUT! Get out of my house!
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345. Get away from this ship, it's not a toy.
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346. Obviously.
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347. This is my best friend Gerald.
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348. He is a brainter.
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349. What? I said, get away from my ship!
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350. Quite aggressive, isn't he?
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351. Kind of jerk.
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352. Gerald, you too. Good night.
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353. - But...
- But "but" nothing. It's late.
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354. Kevin...
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355. Did I tell you to tell everybody in the neighborhood
that we have a space man living in our house?
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356. Don't you think we have enough problems?
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357. But Mom, what's the fun of having an alien,
if you can't show it off?
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358. Now listen, don't do anything without asking me!
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359. What?
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360. Get the gun out of my face!
What did I just tell you?
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361. Kevin, how are you doing?
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362. Don't touch him!
Braxton... What do you want?
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363. Just paid a visit, see how you're doing.
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364. Looking good. You want
some money or something?
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365. Don't want your money. I don't want anything from you.
Just get these people out of my house, Braxton!
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366. I'm looking for your friend. The midget.
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367. I told you he's not a midget!
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368. - Shut the fuck up!
- Look, I don't know who you're talking about!
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369. Look, don't fuck with me, Debi.
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370. This Snowman of yours hitted my boys.
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371. Braxton! Leave. Us. Alone!
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372. Where is he?
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373. Looks just like it's his!
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374. Oh fuck!
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375. - It's about the size, you know.
- No!
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376. Jesus Christ...
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377. Oh fuck...
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378. A little paint and you'd be just like brand new.
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379. isn't it?
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380. But things don't change.
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381. People don't.
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382. I'm gonna loose, aren't I?
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383. Only if you give up, lady.
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384. Thanks.
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385. Mommy! Mommy!
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386. What is it, honey?
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387. Oh, baby...
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388. The bad men are gone...
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389. It's alright. Shhh...
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390. Is a bad dream, honey. Go back to sleep.
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391. Oh, Brax, what's up, man?
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392. What the fuck?
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393. But not like this...
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394. I see you've met Brick.
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395. I had some experience with
his blaster damage.
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396. I can stop the bleeding by fusing
the molecules in a sonic proton wash.
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397. If there is no internal bleeding...
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398. you're a live man!
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399. - Do it!
- Not so fast. You promise to help me.
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400. I want that help now, tonight.
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401. It's too dangerous, you know.
I'm tired of being small.
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402. I want my ship prepared...
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403. and I want to leave, fast.
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404. Do we have understanding?
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405. Yo, whatever you say.
Just fucking do it!
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406. Hey, you pretty fucking good!
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407. Hey...
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408. you promise me a bomb.
First show it to me, or there's no deal.
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409. It's right behind me.
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410. All you do...
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411. is push the button.
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412. Ten seconds later...
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413. Boom!
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414. Everything within three parsecs
is sent to another dimension forever.
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415. But that's for later.
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416. After you've done everything I need.
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417. From now on, you work for me.
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418. - You'll do what you say.
- Work for you?
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419. You're In the wrong fucking
neighborhood, deadhead.
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420. Call mommies together, we're going to war.
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421. - With who?
- With the fucking doll, man, who else?
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422. the other guy,
he almost killed you.
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423. So the fuck what? We got a dimensional bomb.
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424. We gonna settle this fuck-up once and for all.
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425. The bomb.
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426. If you're cold, you can put this on. It's warm.
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427. No, thanks.
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428. Alright.
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429. So, do you have a family back home?
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430. - Not anymore.
- But you used to?
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431. Mind if I get a little sleep?
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432. Sorry.
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433. Good night.
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434. I had a wife and two kids.
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435. Baby girl...
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436. a boy about Kevin's age.
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437. Someone who wanted to hurt me,
did it by hurting them.
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438. Kevin's father is dead, too.
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439. He was shot, holding up a liquor store, years ago.
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440. Kevin doesn't even remember him.
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441. He was a gangbanger, Brooklyn Homeboy.
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442. And at the time I thought...
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443. Homeboy was as cool as you can get.
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444. And then when Kevin was born, he swore he was
done with gangs, done with crime. But... he lied.
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445. I don't know, it's like...
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446. in this neighborhood gangs are the only way you
can be noticed, the only way you can be somebody.
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447. And they give you a new name,
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448. and then you are Shorty, or Sleepy, or Psycho...
Gangs give you an identity.
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449. I didn't know how hard it is keeping Kevin away...
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450. his friends already belonged...
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451. Was trying then...
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452. I'm gonna lose him if I don't
do something about it.
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453. So why didn't you leave?
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454. Where... would I go?
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455. I don't have any money,
I can't even pay the rent.
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456. Dropped out of school to have Kevin.
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457. Besides, this is my home. This is where I grew up,
everything I've ever known is here. I'm not gonna run away.
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458. You've got a lot of guts. Lady. But maybe
you're using the wrong approach.
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459. What do you mean?
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460. Fight fire with fire.
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461. I always thought you fight fire with water?
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462. Some fires are too big.
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463. Kevin, leave him alone.
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464. Kev, get it and gear, you're late.
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465. Have a good day at school.
Be careful. I love you. Bye.
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466. Oh, hi.
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467. Here is my number at work,
in case you need to call.
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468. I don't think going to work is such a great idea,
if those punks are looking for you.
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469. Well, if I don't go to work, I don't get paid.
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470. If I don't get paid, I can't pay the rent.
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471. And there is nothing to eat, so...
I'm going to work.
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472. I think you should stay in, though.
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473. The world isn't safe for someone your size.
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474. I'll be home at 7.
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475. - Kevin will be home around 3.30.
- Look, lady, I'm gonna find the rest of these punks...
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476. and finish this.
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477. No, you're not.
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478. Got to do what I got to do, lady.
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479. Be careful out there, Debi.
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480. So you're trying to tell me that 13-inch man
saved your ass from Braxton?
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481. Yes. I thought it was like a hallucination
or something that I must... I mean...
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482. I don't know, what I'm gonna do with him.
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483. Ah, a 13-inch man.
Are you sure it was not a dream?
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484. I'm serious.
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485. Come over tonight and see him for yourself.
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486. I would like to see a 13-inch man...
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487. You know what I mean...
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488. I wonder where he came from...
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489. and what to do?
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490. What's so funny, ladies?
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491. Nothing's funny, sir.
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492. Nothing's funny but thew toxic waste, Mr.
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493. Well, then keep back to wooork!
You're way too high!
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494. What's his problem?
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495. Hmm, he asked me out to Guns'n'Roses concert.
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496. till I might take that mutants slain from work.
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497. - He didn't!
- Yeah!
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498. What the fuck are we waiting for?
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499. We wait because I said we wait.
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500. We can with this bitch.
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501. Well, it's about time.
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502. Fuck, man.
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503. What's the matter?
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504. - Oh, fuck!
- Yo, I thought that little guy fixed you.
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505. I hope he didn't go home.
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506. Not without his ship.
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507. You know, there does not seem to be
much structural damage.
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508. Maybe if I just adjust this... ...
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509. Back away, Gerald.
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510. I think he suffers from Napoleonic syndrome.
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511. - What?
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512. Short man's complex.
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513. So... how long do you think this guy
gotta stay with us?
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514. I don't know.
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515. I don't know. His spaceship doesn't work,
so he can't really go anywhere.
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516. - Guess he's stuck here.
- You want him to stay though, don't you?
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517. - Señora Alejandro?
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518. - Ah, señora Rodriguez, Que tal?
- Bien, ¡oiga!
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519. I heard about this doll-man.
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520. that he blew away Braxton's Red Homies
last night, es eso cierto?
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521. Yeah, it's true.
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522. ¡Oiga! E cuando Se next meeting of
Neighbourhood Watch?
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523. Thursday, 7:30 at the cafeteria.
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524. - I'll be there!
- Really?
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525. - Si!
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526. Vivian, you know we can make a difference.
We can CHANGE this neighborhood.
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527. Especially with this doll-man blowing away
all the scumbags for us, eh?
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528. That's not the way
I wanted this to work out.
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529. - I'll go, friend.
- See ya.
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530. later to see your doll.
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531. Braxton! Ah! Leave me alone!
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532. - Or what? Your little friend gonna kick my ass, huh?
- Help! Somebody, help!
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533. - Put her in the car!
- We'll gonna stop you, you son of a bitch!
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534. Get away! ALL OF YOU!
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535. Get off!
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536. - Kevin, where's the doll?
- Braxton got your mom downstairs.
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537. Kevin, get out of my way!
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538. Hear out for the Doll-man, 'cause he's
gonna come looking for her.
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539. Hey, can you spare a smoke, man?
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540. Sit down.
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541. Stop this, Braxton. You're hurt.
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542. The fuck do you care?
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543. Yeah...
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544. Don't even think about it!
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545. Braxton, you gonna die
if you don't get some help.
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546. - So I die.
- But you can stop this before you go down.
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547. When you gonna get to what's going on here? Huh?
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548. The world gonna go down, Debi,
because that's the man wants it.
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549. Can't you see that? Huh?
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550. You think they care about you?
You think they care about Dalton Avenue, huh?
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551. They don't give a shit.
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552. You're on the wrong fucking side.
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553. Sit down.
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554. Don't make me get up.
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555. Fucking SIT DOWN!
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556. What the fuck are we fucking waiting for?
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557. I mean. Fuck this shit!
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558. Fuck, man, I'll fucking set up this fucked-up!
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559. This little fucker knows what kind of fuck
so let's fuck away from here and fuck him up!
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560. So let's get the fuck out of this fucking
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561. - Does fucking anybody seen anything yet?
- Nothing yet. Come on down here.
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562. Fuck it!
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563. Braxton, man, it's been three hours.
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564. He ain't gonna show.
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565. He must have found out what's waiting for him.
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566. Ahh, fuck him.
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567. I'm putting you go, huh?
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568. Come on, go.
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569. OK, Jim, the punk did not show, so we're
out of here. The van will meet us down here. Over.
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570. Got it, homie.
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571. And I thought this would gonna be hard.
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572. Hey, Jimmer! Jimmer, man, where the fuck are you?
Get down here! We're ready to roll!
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573. What the fuck is going on there?
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574. Urban fucking renewal.
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575. You did the mistake, Debi.
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576. A fucking MISTAKE, Debi!
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577. I'll teach you some respect right now.
Do you remember Benny? HUH?
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578. Whore Debi...
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579. Oh, fuck. I fucking kept you alive!
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580. And you fucking don't RESPECT ME!
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581. Fucking... bitch...
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582. I'll show you how fucking disrespect me.
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583. NOBODY DISRESPECTS ME!
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584. Goodbye, Debi.
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585. Why don't you pick up someone your own size,
you fucking puke?
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586. You suck, asshole.
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587. You remind me of a guy I knew back home.
I didn't like him either.
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588. AARRGH, MOTHERFUCKEEER!
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589. Fuck, my gun!
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590. Now let's see how you like it,
tiny motherfucker!
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591. No, let's see this like for you, motherfucker.
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592. - Step aside, lady. Let me finish this.
- It's finished.
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593. - Come on, it's finished. Don't you see that?
- He's scum.
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594. He does not deserve to live.
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595. Because your family isn't alive, is that it?
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596. Come on, let it go.
Just let it go.
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597. - Step aside.
- Okay...
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598. Don't do it for me!
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599. Okay, lady.
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600. You win.
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601. Wrong. Nobody fucking wins.
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602. Is a fusion bomb.
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603. Run!
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604. Run!
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605. So Debi, tell me size doesn't count.
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606. subtitles © 2015
Victor Vacendak
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