1. Coming through!Copy !req
2. Do you understand?
Keep your hands off me!Copy !req
3. - I'll be with you in a moment.
- Don't walk away.Copy !req
4. - What kind of doctor are you, anyway?
- Just a minute.Copy !req
5. Doctor, I can't feel my arm.
I can't feel it.Copy !req
6. - I can't feel my arm.
- I can't feel it right now either.Copy !req
7. - Can someone feel his arm?
- I can't feel it.Copy !req
8. Don't touch my hair.Copy !req
9. Kiss the boo-boo.
Kiss the boo-boo.Copy !req
10. - Hey, you're still here.
- Yeah, I'm still here. Can you believe it?Copy !req
11. Save me some coffee,
you savage.Copy !req
12. What is this,
Alfred Hitchcock Presents?Copy !req
13. - What's the problem?
- Gunshot wounds. Shoulder, abdomen.Copy !req
14. We've been paging you.
You on California time already?Copy !req
15. - I was in Radiology working on my tan.
- Pulse, 120.Copy !req
16. Get this guy typed
and crossed, huh?Copy !req
17. Okay, question: Beverly Hills,
beautiful women and plastic surgery...Copy !req
18. what do these three
things have in common?Copy !req
19. Me, in less than a week.Copy !req
20. Okay, don't worry about his shoulder.
He's probably bleeding internally.Copy !req
21. Call Dr. Sotto, tell him to prep for O.R.
I'm out of here tonight.Copy !req
22. Convince me I'll be nostalgic for here
when I'm at the Halberstrom Clinic.Copy !req
23. - Halberstrom?
- Cosmetic surgery for the rich.Copy !req
24. - I'm not in it for the money.
- Half a million salary when he's partner.Copy !req
25. That high-profit stuff makes it possible
for us to do reconstructive surgery...Copy !req
26. on the needier patients.
You're a saint.Copy !req
27. - Got another customer over there.
- I'll do it. My going-away present to you.Copy !req
28. - What's the problem?
- Too much fun. Substance unknown.Copy !req
29. Okay, stay with us. Stay with us.
What'd you take, man?Copy !req
30. Bluebirds, dillies, love boats?Copy !req
31. I heard Halberstrom might not
even hire anyone this year.Copy !req
32. Well, I'm not anyone.Copy !req
33. Mulready, some of the guys are having
a going-away bash for me tonight.Copy !req
34. - If you're interested, I'd love...
- Not in this lifetime.Copy !req
35. - Clean up.
- Thanks.Copy !req
36. Come on, what do you say, guys?
Dinner. Think about it.Copy !req
37. Come on, it's my last night.
A couple of lousy beers?Copy !req
38. - Take care, man.
- Guys...Copy !req
39. I'll send you a postcard.Copy !req
40. What?Copy !req
41. At the risk of sounding schmaltzy,
I just wanna tell you...Copy !req
42. that you're a schmuck.
I hope I never see you again.Copy !req
43. Thanks, Tommy. I know how hard
it was for you to say that.Copy !req
44. You're a good doctor, Ben. I just thought
you were gonna practice real medicine.Copy !req
45. Think I'm making a mistake
going to Halberstrom?Copy !req
46. No.
Cosmetic surgery is clean...Copy !req
47. you make tons of money,
nobody dies.Copy !req
48. What's wrong with that, right?Copy !req
49. Right.Copy !req
50. Bye, Ben.Copy !req
51. Oh, come on.Copy !req
52. Look out.Copy !req
53. All right, okay.
Can I just ask you...Copy !req
54. where am I now?Copy !req
55. Oh, man. Oh, God. Oh, God.
I'm okay. I'm okay.Copy !req
56. Accident. Woman in the middle
of the road with a cow!Copy !req
57. All right.
I'm okay.Copy !req
58. Damn, my car.
Oh, man, the whole front end is shot!Copy !req
59. Am I glad you're here.Copy !req
60. Is that a '56 or
a '57 Speedster?Copy !req
61. Fifty-six.Copy !req
62. Hey, come on, get out.
Will you get out of the car!Copy !req
63. Get away from there.Copy !req
64. - Took three weeks to build that fence.
- I'm sorry.Copy !req
65. Does this have a Super 90
engine or a 1600?Copy !req
66. It wasn't really
anybody's fault.Copy !req
67. My insurance will probably
pay for the fence...Copy !req
68. and that should be fine.
Okay?Copy !req
69. - Won't be the same.
- This ain't a kit car, is it?Copy !req
70. No, it ain't.
It isn't.Copy !req
71. My name is Ben Stone.Copy !req
72. I'm a medical doctor.
I'm a surgeon.Copy !req
73. Awesome.
Who thrashed the fence?Copy !req
74. I'm Ben Stone.
Here's the address of my clinic in L.A.Copy !req
75. - Did he say he's been stoned?
- He says he's from L.A.Copy !req
76. You can send a bill there
or we can use plastic.Copy !req
77. I'm not really from L.A.
I'm just on my way to...Copy !req
78. - You're lucky I was passing through.
- What's in the trunk? Pot?Copy !req
79. I'm a surgeon. Come on, will you
get away! Get away from the car!Copy !req
80. - Sorry.
- Not you, the dog.Copy !req
81. The finest fence I'll ever put up.Copy !req
82. I know a Willie Stone in Stanton.
Is that family of yours?Copy !req
83. - I understand what you're trying to do.
- This the new Mazda?Copy !req
84. And I'm not putting up
with any small-town bullshit.Copy !req
85. Where's the dang engine?Copy !req
86. Get away from this car! You don't
even know where the engine is.Copy !req
87. Got you.Copy !req
88. Look, I'm sorry
about what happened...Copy !req
89. but it was an accident, okay?
It was nobody's fault.Copy !req
90. Get me to a phone. I'll call a Porsche
mechanic in the next big city.Copy !req
91. I'll get my car fixed, be on my way,
and you can go back to doing...Copy !req
92. whatever it is you do.Copy !req
93. All right, I admit it!
I flattened the damn fence!Copy !req
94. What are you gonna do,
lock me up?Copy !req
95. Court finds the defendant guilty
of crimes under code 453-19...Copy !req
96. reckless driving, and 466-2,
reckless endangerment.Copy !req
97. - This is insane.
- No, this is Grady.Copy !req
98. Your Honor, there were cows
in the middle of the road.Copy !req
99. Now, I told you my insurance company
would pay for a new fence.Copy !req
100. I built that fence myself.Copy !req
101. Neither you nor your insurance can
pay me for a fence I built myself.Copy !req
102. Next best thing would be
a fence that you built.Copy !req
103. - These hands are delicate instruments.
- I doubt you could build a good fence.Copy !req
104. Therefore, since you're
a licensed physician...Copy !req
105. and we are a town in acute
shortage of medical care...Copy !req
106. You wouldn't.
Your sentence will be 16 hours...Copy !req
107. of community service...Copy !req
108. served as resident doctor
at Grady Memorial Hospital.Copy !req
109. I have to be in Los Angeles
by Tuesday, so I don't...Copy !req
110. Thirty-two hours.Copy !req
111. - This is extortion!
- You want 64 hours?Copy !req
112. No.Copy !req
113. Court is adjourned.Copy !req
114. All rise.Copy !req
115. - I am so fucked.
- Watch your language, doc.Copy !req
116. You're in the buckle of the Bible belt
here. Try saying "fudge" or something.Copy !req
117. - "Fiddlesticks" too strong?
- Depends.Copy !req
118. Don't you worry about
your automobile, doc.Copy !req
119. I always wanted an excuse to
buy me a set of metric tools.Copy !req
120. Sh... Sugar.Copy !req
121. Hey.Copy !req
122. I'm Dr. Benjamin Stone.Copy !req
123. Nurse Packer. I'm assuming
Judge Evans told you.Copy !req
124. Fine.
Here's what I need.Copy !req
125. Comfortable bed, hot shower,
warm meal, locker to put my stuff in...Copy !req
126. Could you show me some kind
of identification, please?Copy !req
127. I'm wearing glasses there.
I wear contacts now.Copy !req
128. My hair's a little shorter.Copy !req
129. That's a mustache.
It's a bad picture.Copy !req
130. If you could direct me to the physician
on call tonight, I'll speak to him.Copy !req
131. "When to call me:Copy !req
132. If you've been stabbed, shot, poisoned,
separated from an appendage...Copy !req
133. knocked or beaten unconscious,
run over by a tractor, mower...Copy !req
134. or generally about to bleed to death.
Otherwise, leave me alone. "Copy !req
135. Signed,
Dr. Aurelius Edsel Hogue, M.D.Copy !req
136. I'm in The Twilight Zone.Copy !req
137. Zwieback and vitamin C in the
upper cabinet if you're hungry.Copy !req
138. Wait a minute. Wait a minute.
This is the best you can do?Copy !req
139. No.Copy !req
140. Oh, good, you're awake. Welcome
to Grady. I'm Mayor Nicholson.Copy !req
141. The second I heard a big-city
doctor was in town...Copy !req
142. I left that rehearsal,
hightailed it over here...Copy !req
143. see if I can make you
more comfortable.Copy !req
144. - We can do better than this.
- Better than this?Copy !req
145. Say, these your duffles?Copy !req
146. I'm not claiming that Grady's no Paris,
France, but we got two gas stations...Copy !req
147. got us a Winn-Dixie, got us cable TV.
Like tennis?Copy !req
148. We got a new tennis court at the high
school. You doctors play golf, though.Copy !req
149. - Learning how to surf, actually.
- Isn't this pretty?Copy !req
150. We had this fixed up for a doctor we
got through the want ads years ago.Copy !req
151. - No one's been in it for a while.
- Mayor Nicholson.Copy !req
152. I'm on my way to California.
Don't be thinking I'm staying here.Copy !req
153. No, no, of course not.Copy !req
154. Well, maybe not.
Give old Grady a chance...Copy !req
155. she might sneak up on
you like a bee in a bottle.Copy !req
156. Surprise!Copy !req
157. - Welcoming committee.
- I hope you're hungry.Copy !req
158. Evening, ladies.Copy !req
159. Ben Stone, this here is Miss Violet
and Miss Lillian and Miss Maddie.Copy !req
160. Ladies,
this here is Ben Stone, M.D.Copy !req
161. Fried chicken, boiled peanuts
and sweet potato pie.Copy !req
162. Catfish, biscuits,
butter beans and watermelon.Copy !req
163. Hungry-Man dinner.
I'm a bad cook.Copy !req
164. Well, I guess I'll just say adieu and
come chauffeur you in the morning.Copy !req
165. No, wait, wait, wait.
Come on.Copy !req
166. You can't leave me here...Copy !req
167. in the middle of nowhere with them.
It's getting late.Copy !req
168. Don't worry. Only one of them horny.
I'm not telling you which one.Copy !req
169. Your face.Copy !req
170. You want a cocktail?Copy !req
171. So anyway, the high-profile,
high-profit work...Copy !req
172. just makes it possible for me
to do the more important...Copy !req
173. reconstructive surgery
for needier patients.Copy !req
174. And get a big house
on the beach.Copy !req
175. It's hard to believe. A man as good-looking
as Dr. Stone should be married.Copy !req
176. Maybe he ain't found
his Adam's rib yet.Copy !req
177. Maybe he indulges in the love
that dare not speak its name.Copy !req
178. - Lillian.
- Will I go blind?Copy !req
179. - It's moonshine, right?
- Well, ouzo, actually.Copy !req
180. - We took a cruise to Greece.
- Not me. I wasn't invited.Copy !req
181. It was one of those
golden-agers tours.Copy !req
182. Sunset Tours, honey.Copy !req
183. - They ate the brains out of a goat.
- Not me.Copy !req
184. - We ate dog.
- I didn't eat no dog.Copy !req
185. You don't know
that you didn't.Copy !req
186. Dr. Stone, there's a legend
about friendship quilts.Copy !req
187. That's bunk.Copy !req
188. Folks say that the first person
to sleep under a friendship quilt...Copy !req
189. will meet the one
they're gonna marry.Copy !req
190. Dream about the one they're
gonna marry, and it's bunk.Copy !req
191. What a fine hand he has.Copy !req
192. Dr. Stone?Copy !req
193. Dr. Stone?Copy !req
194. Oh, God.Copy !req
195. Hello.Copy !req
196. Hi.Copy !req
197. - Good morning.
- Is something wrong?Copy !req
198. No, no, no.Copy !req
199. I'm a doctor.Copy !req
200. Yeah, I know who you are.Copy !req
201. Hey, I'm sorry. Would you...?
Do you want this?Copy !req
202. If you're a doctor, I don't have
anything you haven't seen before.Copy !req
203. You can blink now.Copy !req
204. All the boys from the state legislature
come here, do their recreating.Copy !req
205. Boy, can they litter. Presidents
come here during the fishing season.Copy !req
206. On purpose?Copy !req
207. One look at all this, Ben boy,
I'm sure you're saying to yourself:Copy !req
208. "I have come to Grady at the most
beautiful time of the year. "Copy !req
209. But, boy, these dogwoods, azaleas,
when they blooming...Copy !req
210. they can't hold a candle to the nuclear
explosion of color come fall.Copy !req
211. Nick, you're the mayor. You have the
authority to commute my sentence.Copy !req
212. Could you do that?Copy !req
213. I'll make it worth your while.
I get back to L.A., we could...Copy !req
214. Why on earth would
I wanna do that?Copy !req
215. How am I gonna convince you
to stay here if you're not here?Copy !req
216. We need a doctor,
you need patients.Copy !req
217. Get off the interstate, Ben Stone.Copy !req
218. Right?Copy !req
219. Don't let the signs of prosperity and
urban sprawl in downtown scare you.Copy !req
220. We're still the same
sleepy little paradise...Copy !req
221. that big-city shrinks recommend
for patients with nervous disorders.Copy !req
222. It's the calming effect
of Grady's natural ozone.Copy !req
223. Fact, there's a world-class
mental hospital up the road.Copy !req
224. That's a comforting thought.Copy !req
225. Ben Stone, do you like coffee?
If you like coffee, we won't go in here.Copy !req
226. - Is that him?
- That's him.Copy !req
227. - He's young, huh?
- Come on, let's go.Copy !req
228. Boys, this here is Ben Stone...Copy !req
229. a Hollywood physician who's
gonna spend a few days with us.Copy !req
230. Ben, this is Mortimer, John, Aubrey.
Probably don't want to shake his hand.Copy !req
231. Sorty in the corner.
Sorty got a cow that sings.Copy !req
232. - You remember Cotton, Miss Lillian.
- Hollywood. La-la land.Copy !req
233. - Beverly Hills, actually.
- Whatever.Copy !req
234. - Well, William's been a movie star.
- It was just an Army training film.Copy !req
235. Come now, you were the star.
You played the lead role.Copy !req
236. It was about VD. I was the bacteria.
Had a big scene with penicillin.Copy !req
237. Yes, a death scene.Copy !req
238. Take a load off, doctor.
This will stop your worries.Copy !req
239. Or start them.Copy !req
240. So, what do you
think of our town?Copy !req
241. - I haven't seen all of it yet.
- Yeah, you have.Copy !req
242. Opportunity abounds here.Copy !req
243. Growth rate was up
point three percent last year.Copy !req
244. - There's no crime.
- By the way, we are the county seat.Copy !req
245. Fellas, no point in beating a dead horse
to death. That's all in the brochure.Copy !req
246. Ben Stone, we are prepared to
offer you a permanent position...Copy !req
247. as medical practitioner supreme
in the Grady metropolitan area...Copy !req
248. the squash capital of the South.Copy !req
249. The salary's $27,000 per annum,
and plus housing.Copy !req
250. Twenty-seven thousand?Copy !req
251. - You see, Nick, I told you...
- Hold on. Thirty thousand.Copy !req
252. Look, you people
don't even know me.Copy !req
253. I noticed right off that he
double-knots his shoelaces.Copy !req
254. - Excellent credentials.
- Shows he's careful.Copy !req
255. Anyway, don't you
already have a doctor?Copy !req
256. We got Hogue.
The problem with Hogue is...Copy !req
257. - He's old.
- Old and wholly unpleasant.Copy !req
258. Point is, he's not going
to be around forever.Copy !req
259. Thirty-five thousand?Copy !req
260. But that would take a unanimous
vote of the whole city council.Copy !req
261. - All in favor say, "Aye. "
- Aye.Copy !req
262. - I abstain.
- You always abstain.Copy !req
263. Look,
I appreciate your problem...Copy !req
264. but I'm not the answer.Copy !req
265. I got a big job interview
on the West Coast.Copy !req
266. It's very important I get there in the
next couple of days. Plastic surgery.Copy !req
267. The truth is, they can probably pay me
about 20 times what you can afford.Copy !req
268. There's a lot of similarities
between Grady and Los Angeles.Copy !req
269. They're just bigger, is all.Copy !req
270. - What do I owe you?
- Ten bucks.Copy !req
271. - Ten bucks for coffee and toast?
- Got you.Copy !req
272. Tell you what, why don't you
wait to make up your mind...Copy !req
273. till after the squash festival, huh?Copy !req
274. All I'm saying, Ben Stone, is give
Grady a chance. I bet you'll like her.Copy !req
275. Yeah, well,
nice meeting you all.Copy !req
276. Thanks.Copy !req
277. - Howdy, nurse. How you doing?
- Doctor's lounge is down the hall.Copy !req
278. You can change in there, then Lou will
show you around. This is your time card.Copy !req
279. You gotta be kidding.Copy !req
280. - Local call?
- I don't know anybody local.Copy !req
281. Pay phone's in the waiting room.Copy !req
282. Yeah, it's... No, it's a collect
call from Dr. Benjamin Stone.Copy !req
283. Stone.Copy !req
284. Come on, do you mind?
This is a...Copy !req
285. personal call.
I guess so.Copy !req
286. Yeah, hi. Yes, this is Dr. Stone.
Actually, that's why I'm calling.Copy !req
287. I don't think I'm gonna be
able to make it on Tuesday.Copy !req
288. I just...
There was a...Copy !req
289. A medical emergency in...Copy !req
290. They don't have a doctor,
so I volunteered my services.Copy !req
291. I'll need to stay until
the situation stabilizes.Copy !req
292. Yeah, medically speaking.Copy !req
293. You're interviewing other doctors?
Friday?Copy !req
294. Yeah, okay, Friday. I can do that. No,
thank you very much. And thank Doctor...Copy !req
295. That was better tap-dancing
than I've seen on Star Search.Copy !req
296. If you tell me you're here for a physical,
you're gonna make my day.Copy !req
297. It's unprofessional to
flirt with the patients.Copy !req
298. I'm just on my way to Beverly Hills.
Plastic surgery.Copy !req
299. Not that you need any.Copy !req
300. Nice try.Copy !req
301. So is this the GQ look
for young urban doctors?Copy !req
302. Well, I've spent the last two years
doing 18-hour days in the ER.Copy !req
303. I find these are
pretty comfortable.Copy !req
304. You don't like them?Copy !req
305. No.Copy !req
306. Okay, fine. Well, I really enjoyed
our time together here...Copy !req
307. but since you're obviously not a patient,
and I'm not getting anywhere...Copy !req
308. tell me where I can find a guy
named Lou, drives an ambulance?Copy !req
309. I'm Lou.Copy !req
310. Where did all these
people come from?Copy !req
311. Folks hear there's a doctor on duty,
they come running.Copy !req
312. Any old doctor.Copy !req
313. Send them in.Copy !req
314. Okay, Mr. Tidwell.Copy !req
315. What the hell have
you got on your foot?Copy !req
316. That's a poultice.Copy !req
317. - Nurse Packer!
- I got a hold to Doc Hogue on the CB...Copy !req
318. and he said that that
will hold me till I came in.Copy !req
319. - You did this on purpose?
- Yes.Copy !req
320. It's chimney soot, biscuit flour
and lard. Doc Hogue said...Copy !req
321. Wipe that crap off Mr. Tidwell's foot,
please, and clean that wound out.Copy !req
322. - You allergic to penicillin?
- Don't know. Ask Doc Hogue.Copy !req
323. Doubt Doc Hogue knows
it's even been discovered.Copy !req
324. Okay. Nurse Packer,
I'm gonna wash this with Betadine...Copy !req
325. close it with a butterfly,
give it a sterile dressing.Copy !req
326. You sure you ought to be
doing that so darned fast?Copy !req
327. I hope so, Mr. Tidwell...Copy !req
328. because je suis fini.Copy !req
329. Okay, Mrs. Owens, if you could
please get up on the table...Copy !req
330. put your feet in the stirrups.Copy !req
331. We're just here about our mail.Copy !req
332. It's from my sister.
We don't read.Copy !req
333. - This ever happen before, Mr. McClary?
- Hell, yes. It happens.Copy !req
334. This ain't nearly the biggest
one I ever took.Copy !req
335. I had a hook in my thigh once.
It must have been, I'd say, like...Copy !req
336. Oh, excuse me, I...
Yeah, well...Copy !req
337. - Fishing's a dangerous business.
- Well, it can be.Copy !req
338. "And after the cow died,Copy !req
339. there just wasn't any
reason for him to go on.Copy !req
340. Meanwhile, Ellen's got herself mixed
up with a Pakistani gentleman...Copy !req
341. who nobody can understand
what he is saying.Copy !req
342. Not even Ellen. "Copy !req
343. I don't see any toxic striations.Copy !req
344. Red streaks.Copy !req
345. You sure it was a black widow?Copy !req
346. Here.
I kept it in some T.P.Copy !req
347. Oh, dear Lord, it's escaped.Copy !req
348. - There it is.
- Wait, there he goes.Copy !req
349. - Here he goes. Here he goes.
- Step on it.Copy !req
350. "She thinks Ray's having an
affair with the pastor's wife...Copy !req
351. but Ray swears it's
his scrub-up rash. "Copy !req
352. Ray is a nut, I'm telling you.Copy !req
353. It's like a blurred
spot in my vision.Copy !req
354. Out there. No. There. No.
No, there.Copy !req
355. I'm cured.Copy !req
356. "The pastor's wife got busted
for growing marijuana...Copy !req
357. out behind the rectory.Copy !req
358. So she'll be spending a spell up in Tupelo
at the minimum-security prison. "Copy !req
359. That's it?Copy !req
360. What about Ellen
and the Pakistani?Copy !req
361. Nurse Packer?
Nurse Packer.Copy !req
362. Where's Doc Hogue? The boy can't
breathe right, and he's turning blue.Copy !req
363. I'm the doctor here.Copy !req
364. Nurse Packer,
you've got to call Doc Hogue.Copy !req
365. - Please.
- It's all right. I'm the doctor.Copy !req
366. - How long has he been like this?
- All afternoon.Copy !req
367. - What's his name?
- Zeb.Copy !req
368. Hey, Zeb, this is going to be
a little cold, all right?Copy !req
369. I just wanna hear your heart.Copy !req
370. Does your tummy hurt?Copy !req
371. All right, take him down to the
examination room. I'll be right there.Copy !req
372. You know where that is?
Right there, okay?Copy !req
373. Have Zeb get up
on the table for me.Copy !req
374. - Call Hogue. Get him here.
- He doesn't like to be disturbed.Copy !req
375. I really don't care. Forget Hogue.
What's the referral hospital?Copy !req
376. - Athens General.
- Call Athens General.Copy !req
377. We have a cardiac emergency.
Tell Lou to fire up the ambulance.Copy !req
378. No, forget it. They have a helicopter.
Tell them to send it.Copy !req
379. - Get me Zeb's medical history.
- I better call Dr. Hogue.Copy !req
380. Damn it. Listen to me,
Hogue is not here. I'm here.Copy !req
381. You do it.Copy !req
382. Here's the situation.Copy !req
383. Your son is turning blue because
he has an abnormal mitral valve.Copy !req
384. It's causing a back flow of blood in
his heart. We may have to operate.Copy !req
385. We'll send him to Athens General.Copy !req
386. Dr. Hogue said you should
give the boy a Coke.Copy !req
387. He says he's probably got a bellyache
and that you should give him a Coke.Copy !req
388. Listen, doctor, I've got a
boy here in cardiac crisis.Copy !req
389. You can't treat that with Coca-Cola or
Bisquick. We have to use real medicine.Copy !req
390. I'm sending him to Athens General.
You're his doctor...Copy !req
391. so get your fat ass out
of bed and go with him!Copy !req
392. - How long will the chopper be?
- Should be here any minute.Copy !req
393. - Where's Stone?
- Dr. Hogue.Copy !req
394. What the hell kind of snot-nosed
puppy doctor are you anyway?Copy !req
395. Wake me up, scare these
folks out of their skivvies.Copy !req
396. Mitral valve regurge.Copy !req
397. I've had a lot of experience with it in ER.
I've even assisted in surgery to correct.Copy !req
398. God only knows how long he's had this,
but you overlooked it. Check his color.Copy !req
399. Nurse Packer,
get that crap off the boy.Copy !req
400. Gene, you gave him the
bismuth subnitrate, didn't you?Copy !req
401. - At first we thought...
- You gave him too much as usual.Copy !req
402. Turned him three shades of blue.Copy !req
403. - Bismuth subnitrate?
- Homegrown antacid.Copy !req
404. You hear a heart murmur?Copy !req
405. No, it's hard to detect.Copy !req
406. You been sampling
your daddy's chaw?Copy !req
407. That will be 65 cents.Copy !req
408. Well, nice work, Hollywood.Copy !req
409. You were about to open
the chest of a 6-year-old boy...Copy !req
410. to cure a case of diarrhea.
Now, listen up, smart-ass.Copy !req
411. Next time I tell you how to
treat a patient of mine...Copy !req
412. you better damn
well do it, "doctor".Copy !req
413. I doubt you'd know
crap from Crisco.Copy !req
414. Hey.Copy !req
415. Yeah, right.Copy !req
416. Shit!Copy !req
417. Wait. Wait.
Hold your horses, doc.Copy !req
418. Now, what if I walked in in the
middle of a hernia operation...Copy !req
419. see some poor gentleman's
guts all over?Copy !req
420. - You killed my car.
- I resent that.Copy !req
421. That car was my life, Melvin.
That car was my baby.Copy !req
422. You want me to stop now?
I can put it in some boxes...Copy !req
423. ship it out to Hollywood for you.
No skin off my nose.Copy !req
424. You and me called it
an oil pump casing.Copy !req
425. Lane had two years of the German
language in high school.Copy !req
426. Doc,
let's step into my office.Copy !req
427. I don't need a car.
I'm moving to Los Angeles.Copy !req
428. - What do I need a car for?
- Lash yourself to the mast.Copy !req
429. Fella up in Oregon has an oil pump
he could air-express to us tomorrow.Copy !req
430. Two hundred thirty-nine bucks,
plus shipping. Only one problem.Copy !req
431. Oregon exploded.Copy !req
432. No.Copy !req
433. He don't take credit.
Or checks.Copy !req
434. And tomorrow being Saturday,
you can't just wire some cash to him.Copy !req
435. Okay, Melvin,
let me ask you this.Copy !req
436. How do you propose
I pay for this?Copy !req
437. Well, I was hoping you'd pay me.Copy !req
438. Then I can trade him for a front rocker
assembly I got from a '68 Nova, but...Copy !req
439. - You don't take credit or checks.
- No, sir. I apologize.Copy !req
440. How long will this
guy in Oregon wait?Copy !req
441. I imagine I could stall
him till Sunday noon.Copy !req
442. Now, he got another taker in Arizona,
but I was first.Copy !req
443. Stall him.Copy !req
444. - Hi, doc.
- Hi, doc.Copy !req
445. - Morning, doc.
- Morning, Ben Stone.Copy !req
446. Howdy, y'all.Copy !req
447. - Dr. Stone. Dr. Stone, I presume.
- Yeah, that's right.Copy !req
448. - Hi.
- Hi.Copy !req
449. Say, you're much taller
than they said you were.Copy !req
450. I'm sitting on a stool.Copy !req
451. And you are?Copy !req
452. Dying to get out of this town.
How about you?Copy !req
453. - Here's your breakfast.
- I haven't ordered yet.Copy !req
454. Compliments of the house.
Don't let old Hogue scare you off.Copy !req
455. We know you weren't aiming
to kill that boy last night.Copy !req
456. Wait a minute, you're not
planning on staying in Grady?Copy !req
457. - Only as long as I have to.
- Thank God.Copy !req
458. For a second, I thought they
got their hooks into you too.Copy !req
459. - Wait, you don't like Grady?
- No.Copy !req
460. So how come you don't leave?Copy !req
461. With you?Copy !req
462. Is that a proposition, doctor?Copy !req
463. I better eat this before it's cold.
Nice meeting you.Copy !req
464. Thanks, Lillian.Copy !req
465. "Prosser on Torts."Civil Procedure. "
A little light reading this morning?Copy !req
466. Did I invite you to sit down?Copy !req
467. No, but you were going to.
Southern hospitality and all.Copy !req
468. - Now what?
- Now let's talk about you.Copy !req
469. Okay. I like my privacy.
I'm a vegetarian.Copy !req
470. I'd appreciate it if you'd take that
slab of ham to the counter with you.Copy !req
471. - It gives me the willies.
- I didn't order this slab.Copy !req
472. Now I suppose you'll say something
cute to stall your retreat.Copy !req
473. Maybe tell me
about the big city...Copy !req
474. all the things I'm missing
living in this dinky town...Copy !req
475. and how you'd like to be the
one to take me out of it.Copy !req
476. Isn't that why you're
going to law school?Copy !req
477. You want to get out
of this dinky little town.Copy !req
478. I'm not going yet. And I plan to
practice in Grady when I'm through.Copy !req
479. Yeah, it looks like a
hotbed of legal activity.Copy !req
480. Well, malpractice for visiting
young surgeons seems promising.Copy !req
481. Who's the green apple, Vialula?Copy !req
482. - Henry, this is Ben Stone.
- Hey.Copy !req
483. Oh, yeah, the new croaker.Copy !req
484. Hank Gordon.Copy !req
485. You're in my chair.Copy !req
486. - Boyfriend?
- "Friend" friend.Copy !req
487. - Need any life insurance?
- What?Copy !req
488. You should be vested
in a term life program.Copy !req
489. Probably a quarter
of a mil to start.Copy !req
490. Come by my office.
We could run a "what if. "Copy !req
491. Or are you too chicken?Copy !req
492. I read somewhere doctors
have the highest suicide rate...Copy !req
493. in any profession
except dentistry.Copy !req
494. - Is that true?
- I won't underwrite dentists. Nope.Copy !req
495. Never trust a man who'll
put his hand in your mouth.Copy !req
496. Well, I'd love to stay and hear
where this conversation's headed...Copy !req
497. but if you all will excuse me.Copy !req
498. There's something else
I wanted to ask you.Copy !req
499. Do doctors know more about
sex than normal people?Copy !req
500. I need some ketchup.Copy !req
501. I have a fair knowledge
of animal husbandry.Copy !req
502. It's all pretty much
the same thing.Copy !req
503. - Bye, doc.
- Bye.Copy !req
504. Women trouble, Ben Stone?Copy !req
505. Squat here.Copy !req
506. - Regard the Grady squash.
- Looks like a yellow zucchini.Copy !req
507. Nope. See, up until 1933, you had
your Grady, you had your zucchini.Copy !req
508. They're going at it,
gourd to gourd.Copy !req
509. Freak tornado accident wiped out
a whole shipment of Gradys...Copy !req
510. bound for, I believe, agricultural
stardom at the Chicago World's Fair.Copy !req
511. The zucchini took there.
Never relented.Copy !req
512. If it had gone the other way, no telling
where this town would be today.Copy !req
513. What are you talking about?Copy !req
514. Timing.
Same thing with women.Copy !req
515. And with Southern women,
they require substantial commitment.Copy !req
516. You might have to stay here
for six months, maybe more.Copy !req
517. - Are you a betting man, Nick?
- I have been known on occasion.Copy !req
518. - Take me about a week.
- Now, wait a minute.Copy !req
519. - You mean Vialula in the center pocket?
- Ten bucks.Copy !req
520. Okay, you got it.Copy !req
521. Feels like I'm fleecing you,
Ben Stone.Copy !req
522. Easy.Copy !req
523. Hello, Nurse Packer.Copy !req
524. All right.Copy !req
525. Okay, let's get something
straight right now.Copy !req
526. I got eight years of higher education, one
year of internship, one year of residency.Copy !req
527. I'm $ 70,000 in debt.Copy !req
528. Now I'm waylaid in
this heehaw hell...Copy !req
529. and you insist on clocking me in
and out like I'm a factory worker.Copy !req
530. Well, no! N-O, no!
This is where I draw the line.Copy !req
531. I believe you have a visitor, doctor.Copy !req
532. Doc, my foot feels so good,
I brought you this pig.Copy !req
533. Okay.Copy !req
534. I can't abide being
in no man's debt.Copy !req
535. This pig's all I got to give.Copy !req
536. I'm already paid, more or less,
by the hospital.Copy !req
537. - I really can't accept your pig.
- It's a done deal.Copy !req
538. She's your pig now.Copy !req
539. God bless you both.Copy !req
540. Keep your animal outside.
This is a hospital.Copy !req
541. - Nice pig there, doc.
- Thank you.Copy !req
542. - Lovely pig.
- Thank you very much. Appreciate it.Copy !req
543. - Nice pig, doc!
- Thank you.Copy !req
544. Thank you all very much.Copy !req
545. Ben Stone. Say, I think I just took away
your last reason to go to California.Copy !req
546. Norrisville Drum and Bugle Corps.Copy !req
547. They played last four
years in the Rose Parade.Copy !req
548. I got them under exclusive contract
to the Grady Squash Festival.Copy !req
549. I'm not staying.Copy !req
550. Sure, you aren't.Copy !req
551. Oh, by the way, dinner at my
house tomorrow night, 6:00.Copy !req
552. - Dinner?
- Didn't I tell you?Copy !req
553. You're guest of honor.Copy !req
554. Shoot a monkey. If my head wasn't
attached, I'd need wood screws.Copy !req
555. - Nice pig, doc.
- Thanks.Copy !req
556. Can I bring a date?Copy !req
557. Well, I don't know.
Can you?Copy !req
558. This is Ben Stone you're talking to.
Come on, pig.Copy !req
559. Fine pig, doc.Copy !req
560. Melvin.Copy !req
561. Melvin.
Melvin.Copy !req
562. Hey, doc. We're just
rehearsing for the pageant.Copy !req
563. We doing a pollination rap song.Copy !req
564. Melvin, listen.Copy !req
565. I don't have the money for the
oil-gepumpkin-hausen thing.Copy !req
566. I mean, when I say I haven't got
the money, that's not entirely true.Copy !req
567. I have the money.
I'm good for the money.Copy !req
568. It's just a matter of accessing
the money in a period of time.Copy !req
569. Can we work something out, please?Copy !req
570. This car has got to be
ready by the time I leave.Copy !req
571. - That your pig?
- Yeah.Copy !req
572. You want to trade?
Pig for the part?Copy !req
573. If you can part with the pig.Copy !req
574. Good.Copy !req
575. - Hi.
- Hi.Copy !req
576. - You just pick those?
- Yes, ma'am.Copy !req
577. They're protected by law.
State flowers.Copy !req
578. Figures.Copy !req
579. I'm already serving time for the fence.
May as well take my chances, right?Copy !req
580. Mama. Mama, who is it?
Who are you?Copy !req
581. I'm Ben.Copy !req
582. Emma, take these inside
and put them in some water.Copy !req
583. You're not supposed
to pick these.Copy !req
584. Use the plastic pitcher.Copy !req
585. Yeah, she's mine.Copy !req
586. She's 4.
You wanna retreat now or...?Copy !req
587. No, no, no.Copy !req
588. No.
Actually, I just came by...Copy !req
589. because I need a date for
dinner tomorrow night.Copy !req
590. - Nick Nicholson's?
- Yeah. How'd you know?Copy !req
591. Can't poop in this town without
everyone knowing what color it is.Copy !req
592. I was fixing to have a cocktail.Copy !req
593. Are you in a hurry?Copy !req
594. Oh, man, that's tart.Copy !req
595. It's called a " Slow Comfortable Screw
Up Against a Wall," with a twist.Copy !req
596. - Is that a Grady specialty?
- No.Copy !req
597. - New York City.
- New York?Copy !req
598. Yeah. I worked at one of those
weirdo theme bars on the West Side.Copy !req
599. Wayne and I went to
college in New York.Copy !req
600. Then he dropped out.Copy !req
601. I got pregnant.
He couldn't get work, so I bartended.Copy !req
602. I managed to finish school, though.Copy !req
603. - Wayne isn't still...?
- Wayne...Copy !req
604. is a professional dancer.Copy !req
605. One of those exotic
Chippendale things.Copy !req
606. He's in Boston, Miami...
I can't keep track.Copy !req
607. He left me after
Emma was born.Copy !req
608. I divorced him and came
running back here.Copy !req
609. Wayne has this extremely
high opinion of his legs.Copy !req
610. You know, I just can't picture
you in the big city.Copy !req
611. New York.Copy !req
612. It's like me...Copy !req
613. - In Grady?
- Yeah.Copy !req
614. Well, peel an onion,
there's lots of layers.Copy !req
615. What layer is Hank on?Copy !req
616. Henry Gordon's sweet on me.Copy !req
617. And he's pretty
decent and solid...Copy !req
618. once you get past the " Insurance
Rebel Without a Clause" routine.Copy !req
619. Decent and solid.Copy !req
620. Very romantic.Copy !req
621. I can see you coming from
half a mile away, Dr. Stone.Copy !req
622. You and your slick city ways.Copy !req
623. I suspect your
version of romance...Copy !req
624. is whatever will separate
me from my panties.Copy !req
625. Look, all I'm talking
about is dinner.Copy !req
626. In public.
Wear a dress.Copy !req
627. Panties are optional.Copy !req
628. Well, I never have had
dinner at the mayor's house.Copy !req
629. Oh, boy.Copy !req
630. And after all,
how could I possibly refuse the man...Copy !req
631. who saved Jasmine
from the butcher?Copy !req
632. - What are you talking about?
- Tidwell's pig.Copy !req
633. He was about to sell
her for pork chops...Copy !req
634. if you hadn't fixed his foot,
made him feel guilty.Copy !req
635. Emma loves pigs.
You keeping her over at your house?Copy !req
636. Lane, where's Melvin?Copy !req
637. Where's Melvin?
I want my pig back.Copy !req
638. Did you say he went to church?
At this hour?Copy !req
639. Are you allowed to come out here?
I can't understand what you're saying.Copy !req
640. Melvin's gone to church.
He's gone to Tylerville.Copy !req
641. The pig got took
to the butcher.Copy !req
642. Melvin took my pig
to the butcher.Copy !req
643. What?Copy !req
644. Mr. Crawford, where's my pig?Copy !req
645. You know, Jasmine, my pig.
Is she still alive?Copy !req
646. - Yes. She's in back.
- Thank God. Thank God.Copy !req
647. - I want her back.
- Doc...Copy !req
648. I know what you're going to say.
Do you take plastic?Copy !req
649. Not unless it's wrapped
around a stack of cash.Copy !req
650. Maybe we can work
it out in trade.Copy !req
651. I don't know. I ain't been
sick in three years, doc.Copy !req
652. I got an idea.Copy !req
653. Where'd you learn to carve like that?
You're pretty darn good with a knife.Copy !req
654. - Hey, Maddie. Hey, Emma.
- Hi, doc.Copy !req
655. You guys are pig-sitting
for me tonight?Copy !req
656. Hey, Jasmine.Copy !req
657. - Who are you?
- Don't tease me.Copy !req
658. I'm serious.
You look like Lou, but prettier.Copy !req
659. I'm warning you, Stone, I could
probably whoop you in a fistfight.Copy !req
660. - Be a good girl.
- Bye.Copy !req
661. - Be a good girl.
- We'll be late.Copy !req
662. Not too much TV for her.
She's a real pig about that.Copy !req
663. Hi. Come on in. Welcome.
You look fantastic.Copy !req
664. - And you look handsome too.
- Thanks.Copy !req
665. Daddy's in the back yard tending
the firestorm in the barbecue.Copy !req
666. - So you're Nick's daughter.
- Gosh, I hope so, I'm in his will.Copy !req
667. Hey, y'all, look who's here.Copy !req
668. Hello, Lou.
Hello, Stone.Copy !req
669. Check Hollywood for knives.Copy !req
670. I don't want him operating on me
later in case I sneeze or something.Copy !req
671. Isn't this gonna be fun?Copy !req
672. - Oh, no, thank you, I'm a vegetarian.
- I know, dear, but I'm still hopeful.Copy !req
673. So am I.
Vegetarian.Copy !req
674. - Since when?
- Then have some of this squash, Ben.Copy !req
675. Flesh of the earth.
Don't be shy.Copy !req
676. I'm not sure I trust a man
who doesn't eat meat.Copy !req
677. Don't be so provincial.
Where's your sense of adventure?Copy !req
678. I'd probably give vegetarians a better rate
for life insurance than a smoker, though.Copy !req
679. On account of that
lower cholesterol factor.Copy !req
680. Daddy, please, new subject.
We wanna hear all about California.Copy !req
681. I heard the women out there
have their chests enlarged...Copy !req
682. their thighs vacuumed
and barf on purpose.Copy !req
683. Not while people are eating.Copy !req
684. Yeah, tell us about
real doctoring, Stone.Copy !req
685. You know, big-city medicine.Copy !req
686. So much has changed in the 40 years
since you went to medical school...Copy !req
687. I wouldn't know
where to start.Copy !req
688. - Smart-ass.
- Got you good.Copy !req
689. - More squash, Ben?
- No. I mean, no, thank you.Copy !req
690. Out of the cradle
Endlessly rockingCopy !req
691. Out of the
mockingbird's throatCopy !req
692. The musical shuttleCopy !req
693. Out of the ninth monthCopy !req
694. - Is this one of the long ones?
- No.Copy !req
695. Long ones?Copy !req
696. Doc Hogue does the complete
Walt Whitman...Copy !req
697. if you don't monitor
his drinking.Copy !req
698. Down from the
shower'd haloCopy !req
699. Up from the mystical
play of shadowsCopy !req
700. Man, I haven't seen this
many stars in a long time.Copy !req
701. I used to get so bored in this town,
I'd try to count them.Copy !req
702. I could've gone
to med school.Copy !req
703. Just the science part of it
I had a problem with.Copy !req
704. I'd lie on my back,
sometimes Wayne...Copy !req
705. would be on top of me
doing the wild thing.Copy !req
706. - It was hard not to lose my place.
- God, that's romantic.Copy !req
707. Then we moved to Manhattan...Copy !req
708. you could hardly see any stars,
let alone count them.Copy !req
709. The stars I'd like to see are
more of the two-legged kind.Copy !req
710. Earthquake insurance
is something I'm keen...Copy !req
711. to take a whack
at out there in L.A.Copy !req
712. Talk about your no-brainer.Copy !req
713. Collect premiums for a gazillion years,
and if the big one ever does hit...Copy !req
714. declare bankruptcy and retire.Copy !req
715. - Decent and solid.
- Nobody's perfect.Copy !req
716. Hank, you gotta
take Hogue home.Copy !req
717. He's about to launch
into "Song of Myself. "Copy !req
718. My Lord.Copy !req
719. Never a dull moment,
hey, Ben Stone?Copy !req
720. I'll call you later.Copy !req
721. Make sure you got home okay.Copy !req
722. - Good night.
- Night.Copy !req
723. - I forgot my pig.
- She's sleeping with Em.Copy !req
724. I'll drop her off in the morning.Copy !req
725. Greek death?
Take the edge off.Copy !req
726. Take the edge off what?Copy !req
727. Me.Copy !req
728. - You ran all the way over here.
- Oh, yeah. I ran and...Copy !req
729. walked.
Got a stitch in my side.Copy !req
730. Why are you giving me
the full-court press...Copy !req
731. if you're only leaving in
a couple of days anyway?Copy !req
732. You know, I don't know.Copy !req
733. It's like it's some kind
of mystical force.Copy !req
734. Force or hormones?Copy !req
735. Hey, come on.Copy !req
736. All I wanna do is talk.Copy !req
737. And get you sloppy drunk.Copy !req
738. Honesty.
That's a new approach.Copy !req
739. I know. You're forcing me
into uncharted territory here.Copy !req
740. Hell, I might even try chastity.Copy !req
741. Seems to work for Hank.Copy !req
742. Speak of the devil.Copy !req
743. Listen, maybe a rain check?Copy !req
744. I never should have
accepted those flowers.Copy !req
745. What about tomorrow night?Copy !req
746. Desperation.
I like this.Copy !req
747. Still, I...Copy !req
748. I wouldn't want the mayor to have to
lose 10 bucks over me, you know?Copy !req
749. Morning.Copy !req
750. Funny.
Funny.Copy !req
751. Morning, doc.
That's a nice pig you got there!Copy !req
752. Yeah, that's
what they tell me.Copy !req
753. Hey, Mr. McClary, be careful you
don't get another hook in your finger!Copy !req
754. Don't worry, doc.
We're not using hooks today.Copy !req
755. It's all right.
It's all right.Copy !req
756. - He's a nice pig, doc.
- It's a she, actually.Copy !req
757. Relax, will you?Copy !req
758. House calls are probably
my favorite part of the job.Copy !req
759. Just driving out into the country, seeing
what might pop up around the next bend.Copy !req
760. Rainbows.Copy !req
761. Frost on the kudzu.Copy !req
762. John Muir said it, " Most people
are on the world, not in it. "Copy !req
763. What?Copy !req
764. Nothing.Copy !req
765. What?Copy !req
766. Listen, you better let me
handle this one alone.Copy !req
767. - Obstetrical exam.
- Okay.Copy !req
768. "So Jimmy Joe went over to the
Pakistani's house with a shotgun. "Copy !req
769. Excuse me.
Jimmy Joe is Ellen's brother?Copy !req
770. No, no.
Boyfriend.Copy !req
771. I was stumped on
that one too.Copy !req
772. "He stayed outside shooting holes
in the fella's foreign car...Copy !req
773. until Ellen came out and agreed
to come back home with him.Copy !req
774. It's the most romantic thing
Jimmy Joe has ever done for her. "Copy !req
775. Tough one.Copy !req
776. How's Ellen making out
with the Pakistani man?Copy !req
777. Get him, get him.
Come on, Bubba.Copy !req
778. I said...
I said, no shots.Copy !req
779. This won't hurt.Copy !req
780. Well, I don't see an infection.Copy !req
781. But...Copy !req
782. Okay, hold still.Copy !req
783. - What is that, a V8?
- He did it.Copy !req
784. You know, house calls used to be
essential to every doctor's practice.Copy !req
785. The only way to know your patients
was to see where they live.Copy !req
786. How they lived.Copy !req
787. Maybe when I get
to Halberstrom's...Copy !req
788. I'll get them to institute some
kind of visitation program.Copy !req
789. Damn it.Copy !req
790. Lou?Copy !req
791. Hey, Lou!Copy !req
792. Do you see another one?
They mark their way with these.Copy !req
793. They're too stupid or too drunk to
remember where they were most times.Copy !req
794. - Who?
- Hunters.Copy !req
795. Maybe this is the end of...
Yeah. See, there it is.Copy !req
796. That's where they sit
and wait for the slaughter.Copy !req
797. It's not like they do it for food either.
God, it gets me so hot.Copy !req
798. You wanna help me here?Copy !req
799. What are you doing?Copy !req
800. I'm urinating.Copy !req
801. You just drop trou
whenever you feel like it.Copy !req
802. Well, it scares the deer away
so the hunters won't get them.Copy !req
803. Why don't you just, you know,
say "boo" or something?Copy !req
804. I try to spread it around.
A little here, a little there.Copy !req
805. Feel free to join in.Copy !req
806. Anyway, it's not like I planned
to be pregnant at 19...Copy !req
807. but it could have been
worse than Wayne.Copy !req
808. Wendall Barnes.Copy !req
809. You'd be interested in him.Copy !req
810. He comes from a whole family
that doesn't have sweat glands.Copy !req
811. Really? I'm fascinated
by the gland-less.Copy !req
812. I guess it's genetic.Copy !req
813. During the summer, they all sleep under
the house on account of the heat.Copy !req
814. That's a touching story. Really.
Thanks for sharing that with me.Copy !req
815. You don't see a lot of things in Grady,
but what you do see, you see a lot of.Copy !req
816. Yeah, I'm from a
small town myself.Copy !req
817. What?Copy !req
818. Marionville, Indiana.
2106.Copy !req
819. Home of the world's
largest steam engine.Copy !req
820. But you told everybody
that you...Copy !req
821. No, no, no. Everybody assumed
I was a big-city guy.Copy !req
822. Nobody asked.Copy !req
823. Anyway, I got out,
and I'm staying out.Copy !req
824. Have you still got
your whole family there?Copy !req
825. Well, they talked
about leaving...Copy !req
826. but my dad never quite...Copy !req
827. They lived there,
they died there.Copy !req
828. For better or for worse.Copy !req
829. So when I left home, I swore to
myself I was never going back.Copy !req
830. It's not the place,
it's the person.Copy !req
831. Be careful what you wish for,
Ben Stone, you might get it.Copy !req
832. What's that supposed to mean?Copy !req
833. You never been back,
not even to see your friends?Copy !req
834. Well, who's got
time for friends?Copy !req
835. No, you gotta get Dr. Stone
back here ASAP.Copy !req
836. We got a possible
coronary emergency.Copy !req
837. - Can't Doc Hogue handle this?
- It is Hogue. Over.Copy !req
838. - Hey, lie down.
- Oh, crap, I'm doomed.Copy !req
839. Lie down now.
You're having a heart attack.Copy !req
840. My angina's acting up is all.Copy !req
841. - Got any nitro pills down there?
- No, get a bolus of Lidocaine.Copy !req
842. I'm the senior sawbones
around here.Copy !req
843. PVCs are too close to your T-waves.
In 30 seconds, you're in trouble.Copy !req
844. Get him away from me.Copy !req
845. If I'm wrong, Lidocaine won't hurt.
If you're wrong, it's a ventricular fib.Copy !req
846. I'm never wrong.Copy !req
847. Get the defibrillator over here.Copy !req
848. Never wrong.Copy !req
849. Four hundred watts.Copy !req
850. Clear.
Clear!Copy !req
851. Heartbeat.Copy !req
852. - Sixty. - Wow, you mean
he actually has one.Copy !req
853. Keep him on oxygen and
set the Lidocaine drip.Copy !req
854. Guess I'm staying here tonight.Copy !req
855. Oh, doctor.Copy !req
856. I've got your bed ready.Copy !req
857. Right.Copy !req
858. Sleep well, doctor.Copy !req
859. At which point, all the bees,
including Melvin...Copy !req
860. lunged off the edge of
the stage like lemmings.Copy !req
861. - A standing ovation.
- Variations on a theme.Copy !req
862. Sorry I missed it.Copy !req
863. That's the first squash pageant
that I missed in 15 years.Copy !req
864. What's going on here?Copy !req
865. It's called moral support
for the recovering patient.Copy !req
866. Cherry cobbler, Ben?Copy !req
867. Everybody out. Let's go.
Come on, visiting hours are over.Copy !req
868. Don't mind Doc Hollywood. He doesn't
know what it means to be beloved.Copy !req
869. If you've come to clean the room,
my bedpan's ripe.Copy !req
870. Oh, no.
Not Maddie's sweet potato pie.Copy !req
871. You can razz me
all you want, doc.Copy !req
872. I saved your life last night.Copy !req
873. You know it, and I know it.Copy !req
874. Gotcha.Copy !req
875. Dr. Halberstrom, please.
It's Ben Stone calling.Copy !req
876. It's regarding...Copy !req
877. I'm not gonna be able to
make my interview on Friday.Copy !req
878. I realize the doctor has a tight schedule.
I'm not gonna be able to leave without...Copy !req
879. Right.Copy !req
880. Is there any way that he can reschedule
the appointment for another time?Copy !req
881. All right.
Thanks a lot.Copy !req
882. Here you go. Get hot and take a shot.
Get hot and take a shot.Copy !req
883. What's the object
of this one, pal?Copy !req
884. Ten shots a dollar.
Five bull's-eyes win a possum.Copy !req
885. - Suppose I was to hit five out of five.
- I'll give you two possums.Copy !req
886. Sir, run Henry a tab.
He feels deadly today.Copy !req
887. Evening, Dr. Stone.Copy !req
888. Hey, doc.Copy !req
889. The new one's in.
Your chariot's good as new.Copy !req
890. Or good as new used,
since it's old.Copy !req
891. - You fixed my car?
- Even all the ashtrays.Copy !req
892. Oh, man, I can't believe this.Copy !req
893. Melvin, thanks, man.Copy !req
894. There's always some
extra parts...Copy !req
895. when I put them back together.
I don't know why.Copy !req
896. But you go ahead on.
Keep them.Copy !req
897. - Dance with me or I'm dog food.
- What?Copy !req
898. - Wendall Barnes.
- Of the gland-less Barnes?Copy !req
899. - Jesus.
- Yeah. Come on.Copy !req
900. Absolutely.Copy !req
901. You see, the trick...Copy !req
902. is just to visualize the target
on the backs of your eyeballs...Copy !req
903. and then pretend you're just
shooting yourself in the eye.Copy !req
904. I can't keep up.Copy !req
905. How's Hogue?Copy !req
906. Meaner than ever.Copy !req
907. Dance?Copy !req
908. Where's Hank?Copy !req
909. I forget.Copy !req
910. The music stopped.Copy !req
911. What music?Copy !req
912. Dr. Stone.Copy !req
913. - I have a present for you.
- Thanks, judge.Copy !req
914. I want to thank you for saving
my old friend Hogue's miserable life.Copy !req
915. I wouldn't be able to
call myself a Christian...Copy !req
916. if I didn't pardon you on the
remainder of your sentence.Copy !req
917. You're free to go
whenever you want.Copy !req
918. What I wouldn't give to
be young on the road...Copy !req
919. footloose and fancy-free.Copy !req
920. Did I tell you? I've already
got plans for a new fence.Copy !req
921. All of a sudden,
I got a bug in my ear...Copy !req
922. for one of those solid-oak
numbers with curly tops.Copy !req
923. Victory.Copy !req
924. Did you kill that critter
all by yourself?Copy !req
925. Very funny.Copy !req
926. Don't you have some urgent business
thousands of miles away from here?Copy !req
927. Vialula, your daughter was dumping
grasshoppers in the punch bowl again.Copy !req
928. Only two.Copy !req
929. - Shake a leg with the judicial branch?
- Why, I'd love to. Thank you.Copy !req
930. Would you hold this possum?Copy !req
931. I think it's time I reacquainted
your mama with some real dancing.Copy !req
932. No offense, Hollywood.Copy !req
933. When you gonna bring
your pig back around?Copy !req
934. Hey there, Ben Stone.
Hey, how are you?Copy !req
935. Been looking for you.
What a great day.Copy !req
936. Boy, this is it.Copy !req
937. The pinnacle of existence,
the grandeur of Grady.Copy !req
938. Sap of life.
Couldn't be happier if I was twins.Copy !req
939. - You put on a hell of a festival, mayor.
- Ain't you nice to say so.Copy !req
940. Ben, let's talk turkey.
Or squash, as it were.Copy !req
941. - About what?
- Home.Copy !req
942. Heart.Copy !req
943. Happiness.Copy !req
944. You belong here, Ben Stone.Copy !req
945. Breaks my heart to think of you
out there in the land of lunatics.Copy !req
946. I'm danged if I'll let you go without
holding up a mirror to your face.Copy !req
947. Like that smile of contentment there.
So you see that? See there?Copy !req
948. That's a face that's liked and loved.
A face with friends and a future.Copy !req
949. Can't find some other
way to force me to stay?Copy !req
950. Ben.Copy !req
951. I am everything but devious.Copy !req
952. Mayor, could you come check these
ribs and tell me if they're done?Copy !req
953. I sure can.Copy !req
954. Rigors of the job, huh?Copy !req
955. Well, you got your fire way too high,
I'll tell you that.Copy !req
956. Well, don't do that.Copy !req
957. Come on, come on.Copy !req
958. - Hi, doc.
- Gentlemen.Copy !req
959. Careful with those things.Copy !req
960. I know I shouldn't be doing this because
you're leaving, but I don't care.Copy !req
961. I can't help it.Copy !req
962. So get in.Copy !req
963. - Do you mean what I think you mean?
- Just get in if you're gonna get in.Copy !req
964. Lou, I gotta be
honest with you.Copy !req
965. Rowing a boat is not
what I had in mind.Copy !req
966. Not bad, huh?Copy !req
967. Incredible.Copy !req
968. - What was that?
- Freshwater mullet.Copy !req
969. They see the sparks from the skyrockets,
think it's food and jump for it.Copy !req
970. That's scary.Copy !req
971. Maybe I could...Copy !req
972. sit next to you,
and you could protect me.Copy !req
973. No.
You'll throw us off balance.Copy !req
974. I want you off balance.Copy !req
975. - He's in the boat!
- Hold still.Copy !req
976. - Get him.
- Watch it, you'll tip us over.Copy !req
977. - Get him, Lou.
- Okay, I got it.Copy !req
978. You did that on purpose.Copy !req
979. All right, I admit it.Copy !req
980. I worked my way through
college by training bass.Copy !req
981. Lou?Copy !req
982. It's okay.Copy !req
983. Listen, if you don't wanna...Copy !req
984. Ben, I don't think I've ever wanted
anything more in my entire life, ever.Copy !req
985. I'm just not used to being
a one-night stand.Copy !req
986. You don't have to be.
I mean, I could...Copy !req
987. No. I wouldn't know what to
do with myself in Los Angeles.Copy !req
988. There are too many choices.Copy !req
989. Let's not think about it, okay?Copy !req
990. I can't do this.Copy !req
991. Mind walking from here? I don't wanna
give the gossips any more fat to chew.Copy !req
992. Right.Copy !req
993. Don't worry, Benjamin,
it'll all work out.Copy !req
994. Hey, Jasmine.Copy !req
995. Hey, Hank.Copy !req
996. You've made me real mad.Copy !req
997. About what?Copy !req
998. What do you think?Copy !req
999. I know you were out
on that lake with her.Copy !req
1000. It makes me sick to
think of you and her.Copy !req
1001. - Nothing happened.
- Oh, right.Copy !req
1002. Nothing happened!Copy !req
1003. Come on, tough guy!
Come on, country boy!Copy !req
1004. You wanna take a shot at me, huh?
Come on!Copy !req
1005. - What are you doing?
- Come on, country boy, get up! Let's go.Copy !req
1006. Are you paranoid
or something?Copy !req
1007. No.Copy !req
1008. But I'm a little confused.Copy !req
1009. I suppose you and her will
be getting married now.Copy !req
1010. It's the Southern way.Copy !req
1011. Man and woman as one.Copy !req
1012. Make sacrifices to build equity
in a future that has security.Copy !req
1013. Why do you sound like
a Mutual of Omaha ad?Copy !req
1014. Fine, joke it up.Copy !req
1015. At least I was
prepared to marry her.Copy !req
1016. She's not in love with you.Copy !req
1017. Okay. That's the only
roadblock, though.Copy !req
1018. Let me ask you something.Copy !req
1019. Don't you think a guy is entitled
to choose his own destiny?Copy !req
1020. Whether it's in a small town
or even in California.Copy !req
1021. It's just that he shouldn't
have it handed to him.Copy !req
1022. Not like it's a...
You know, like...Copy !req
1023. A hat?Copy !req
1024. Right. Okay, good.
Like a hat.Copy !req
1025. Your father and your grandfather wore it,
now you're stuck with it.Copy !req
1026. Only the damn thing is too small.
It just doesn't fit.Copy !req
1027. - I hate a tight hat.
- There's a lot of hats out there.Copy !req
1028. And even if this one fits...Copy !req
1029. and I'm not saying
that it does...Copy !req
1030. how do you know it's the right one
when you haven't tried any others on?Copy !req
1031. I sure haven't.Copy !req
1032. I mean, that's what
I'm talking about.Copy !req
1033. I just don't wanna
screw up her life.Copy !req
1034. You know, Hollywood...Copy !req
1035. sometimes a man's gotta
do what a man's gotta do.Copy !req
1036. And maybe...
Maybe it's in California.Copy !req
1037. Yeah, maybe you're right.Copy !req
1038. - Well, I'm glad we got that cleaned up.
- Me too, Hank.Copy !req
1039. Don't that take the
rag off the bush?Copy !req
1040. Don't forget what I told you.Copy !req
1041. Hey, please!Copy !req
1042. Shit.Copy !req
1043. Shit.Copy !req
1044. Shit.Copy !req
1045. Dr. Stone.Copy !req
1046. Mary. Decided to drop by,
see how you were doing.Copy !req
1047. No damn good. Water's broke. I hurt.
This ain't like none of the others.Copy !req
1048. They never are.Copy !req
1049. Did Doc Hogue tell you this baby
might come out the wrong way?Copy !req
1050. He's coming.
He don't care which way.Copy !req
1051. - Fiddlesticks. Don't push, Mary.
- I can run, get an ambulance.Copy !req
1052. There's no time for that. Go into my
duffle bag, there's four clean shirts.Copy !req
1053. Get them and rip them
into even pieces.Copy !req
1054. Listen, Mary, don't push. I know
you want to, but don't push.Copy !req
1055. I'll try to turn him around
so he comes the right way.Copy !req
1056. Is it these ones?Copy !req
1057. - "Aramana"?
- Armani. Those are the ones.Copy !req
1058. Okay, now. Now! That's it.
Great. Great. Great.Copy !req
1059. Okay, okay, okay.Copy !req
1060. Now go! Push. Push, Mary.
You're doing great.Copy !req
1061. You're doing great.Copy !req
1062. I got a leg.
I got a leg.Copy !req
1063. All right.
Go ahead, go ahead.Copy !req
1064. Someone's coming.Copy !req
1065. Doc, someone's coming.Copy !req
1066. Okay, all right.Copy !req
1067. Push!
Push, Mary!Copy !req
1068. Doc, your car.Copy !req
1069. What do I do?Copy !req
1070. Okay.Copy !req
1071. - Good girl!
- What do I do?Copy !req
1072. Push, Mary.Copy !req
1073. It's a girl!Copy !req
1074. I think I can fix that.Copy !req
1075. - You rang?
- First breech you ever delivered?Copy !req
1076. First baby I ever delivered.Copy !req
1077. By myself.Copy !req
1078. - Whiskey?
- No, thanks.Copy !req
1079. In fact, I wouldn't recommend
that for you, either.Copy !req
1080. You're not my doctor,
and you're not my wife...Copy !req
1081. so I guess you don't have
very much to say about it.Copy !req
1082. You're not fixing
to stay, huh, Stone?Copy !req
1083. Changed your mind, huh?Copy !req
1084. Now that your car's
all busted to bubkes...Copy !req
1085. and you're feeling pretty good
about yourself in general, huh?Copy !req
1086. Come here.Copy !req
1087. I had them up once.Copy !req
1088. Over 700 babies I delivered
in this town over the years.Copy !req
1089. Nurse Packer.Copy !req
1090. She popped right out complete with
teeth and hair and bit me. An omen.Copy !req
1091. Nicholson.Copy !req
1092. Hank.Copy !req
1093. I gave them birth, saw them
through every sneeze and sniffle...Copy !req
1094. and sometimes even walked
them to the gravesite.Copy !req
1095. They're pretty well
my portfolio, Stone.Copy !req
1096. That and an old car,
an old house.Copy !req
1097. I wouldn't trade any
of them for gold.Copy !req
1098. Well, maybe gold.Copy !req
1099. Or cash money.Copy !req
1100. - Hey.
- Doc.Copy !req
1101. Hey, Mary, how's our girl?Copy !req
1102. We decided she's gonna be
"Benjamina," after you.Copy !req
1103. What?Copy !req
1104. Thank you.Copy !req
1105. There's an obstetrician coming
up from Athens General later...Copy !req
1106. just to make sure
everything's okay.Copy !req
1107. Benjamina.Copy !req
1108. Yo, doc, I wanted to just thank
you for, you know, everything...Copy !req
1109. so I made you this
in appreciation.Copy !req
1110. I know it ain't very much, so if there's
ever anything at all I can do for you...Copy !req
1111. Just let me know what happens
with Ellen, Jimmy Joe and the Pakistani.Copy !req
1112. I heard what happened last night.
You did great.Copy !req
1113. - I didn't know what I was doing.
- Well, sometimes that's the best way.Copy !req
1114. There's something
that I wanted to say.Copy !req
1115. Something I wanted to say
to you first. Is that okay?Copy !req
1116. So I've been doing a lot of
thinking about last night.Copy !req
1117. Last night was really difficult.Copy !req
1118. Everything's all turned around now.
I've been thinking about you and me...Copy !req
1119. and big cities, small towns...
Well, I'm gonna marry Hank.Copy !req
1120. I've decided.Copy !req
1121. It's a plane ticket
to Los Angeles.Copy !req
1122. The whole town chipped in.Copy !req
1123. We've kept you here this long, and if you
wait for Melvin to fix your car again...Copy !req
1124. You got Los Angeles
waiting for you.Copy !req
1125. I've got Emma.
It's not fair to you.Copy !req
1126. Hank's steady, and he's here.Copy !req
1127. You...Copy !req
1128. You're like a big, bright shooting star and
you're right, Ben, you'd burn out here.Copy !req
1129. Wait a minute.Copy !req
1130. Well, Ben Stone, you have five minutes
to say goodbye to Shangri-la.Copy !req
1131. Cotton will give you a police
escort to the airport.Copy !req
1132. We made you a sack lunch.Copy !req
1133. Airplane food can cause gas.Copy !req
1134. I guess I'll watch
after your pig.Copy !req
1135. Just hope she takes to the farm
after living in town like this.Copy !req
1136. Appreciate it.Copy !req
1137. A lot of folks around
here gonna miss you.Copy !req
1138. I don't mean me.
But a lot of folks.Copy !req
1139. Adieu.Copy !req
1140. Back to the interstate,
Ben Stone, huh?Copy !req
1141. Back to the interstate.Copy !req
1142. You okay?Copy !req
1143. Oh, yes, I am fine.Copy !req
1144. Good morning, Halberstrom Clinic.
Could you hold, please.Copy !req
1145. Good morning, Halberstrom Clinic.
Good morning, Halberstrom Clinic.Copy !req
1146. Oh, hold.
Yes, doctor.Copy !req
1147. - Mr. Stone?
- Dr. Stone.Copy !req
1148. Dr. Halberstrom
can see you now.Copy !req
1149. Do you have any idea how many
applications I went through this year?Copy !req
1150. Yes, sir. That's why I knew
this interview was important.Copy !req
1151. I would've been here earlier
if I could've been. I think...Copy !req
1152. I know you're a great surgeon, Stone.
That whole pile is full of great surgeons.Copy !req
1153. Did you expect
special consideration...Copy !req
1154. because we're from
the same hometown?Copy !req
1155. - Because I knew your father?
- No, sir.Copy !req
1156. Good.
Because you didn't get shit.Copy !req
1157. You wouldn't be here at all if it weren't
for a call I got from Dr. Aurelius Hogue.Copy !req
1158. Dr. Hogue called you?Copy !req
1159. I saw two doctors last week
with more experience than you...Copy !req
1160. and better board
certification scores.Copy !req
1161. Dr. Hogue's a piece
of work, isn't he?Copy !req
1162. What did he say?Copy !req
1163. That you were doing volunteer family
practice down South somewhere.Copy !req
1164. Yes. Yeah.
Yes, yes, that's right.Copy !req
1165. Went there to get that small-town
chip off your shoulder, didn't you?Copy !req
1166. - Yeah. - Well, you're
braver than I was, Stone.Copy !req
1167. Any case,
Hogue said you were, quote:Copy !req
1168. "One hellaciously fine physician. "Copy !req
1169. That I would be " a bovine,
clodpated, citified moron"...Copy !req
1170. if I didn't hire
you on the spot.Copy !req
1171. I wrote it down so
I wouldn't forget.Copy !req
1172. So I guess you're in, Stone.
Congrats.Copy !req
1173. What time do I tee off?Copy !req
1174. You do play golf, don't you?Copy !req
1175. Great. Don't worry about that.
It's not anywhere you can see it.Copy !req
1176. The secret to this business is to
get a good pace going for yourself.Copy !req
1177. Nobody likes to admit it,
but medicine's a volume business.Copy !req
1178. Ninety-nine percent of what
we do is boilerplate surgery.Copy !req
1179. It means we can afford the
one percent that's meaningful.Copy !req
1180. Disfigurements, birth defects,
hare lips.Copy !req
1181. Cleft palates.
You live for those moments.Copy !req
1182. The bigger you get,
the bigger the nut.Copy !req
1183. We're a service industry. Comes with
the territory. Fixed costs, specialization.Copy !req
1184. People adjust to it or fail.
Look at cable TV.Copy !req
1185. You're gonna see
some changes, Stone.Copy !req
1186. Stone, see if patient number
434 is in preop yet.Copy !req
1187. We can squeeze one more in
before lunch, don't you think?Copy !req
1188. Hi. This is the National
Weather Service forecast...Copy !req
1189. for the greater Grady
area tomorrow.Copy !req
1190. There'll be plenty of
sunshine and blue skies.Copy !req
1191. The old temperature
should be in the 90s again...Copy !req
1192. but a cool afternoon breeze will
make it all worthwhile come evening.Copy !req
1193. Y'all look out for the lightning
bugs after sunset.Copy !req
1194. - Actress alert.
- Excuse me.Copy !req
1195. Some girl called for you.Copy !req
1196. Said you'd know who it was,
said she'd meet you at this bar.Copy !req
1197. Like, as if you're gonna rush
right over there. Right.Copy !req
1198. Totally unbelievable Southern accent.
An actress, I'll bet.Copy !req
1199. - Hi. Can I help you?
- I'm supposed to meet someone, a girl.Copy !req
1200. Ben.Copy !req
1201. Nancy Lee?Copy !req
1202. Well, I had to give it a shot, you know.
I just thought, just in case.Copy !req
1203. Guess not.Copy !req
1204. You...Copy !req
1205. You drove all this way
just to bring me my car?Copy !req
1206. Sort of.Copy !req
1207. Well, I mean, it gave me an excuse
to get the hell out of Grady.Copy !req
1208. Pardon my French.
Things were bad before...Copy !req
1209. but since you left,
they got positively stagnant.Copy !req
1210. - How's Hogue?
- Well, he's the same.Copy !req
1211. - Melvin?
- Same.Copy !req
1212. How's your dad?Copy !req
1213. Why don't you ask
me about Vialula?Copy !req
1214. What's there to ask, really?
I guess she and Hank are...Copy !req
1215. You're in my chair.Copy !req
1216. Slide a bit, Nancy Lee.Copy !req
1217. There's a man in the toilet selling
aftershave. Now, what's that all about?Copy !req
1218. Hank.Copy !req
1219. What are you doing here?Copy !req
1220. Took my own advice, doc.
Knowing when to stay, when to get out.Copy !req
1221. I thought you and
Lou were gonna get...Copy !req
1222. Lou was never gonna marry me.
So I broke it off, clean.Copy !req
1223. You dumped her?Copy !req
1224. A man's gotta do
what a man's gotta do...Copy !req
1225. even if it's in California.
Sense of higher purpose, you know?Copy !req
1226. Is that a star?Copy !req
1227. No, that's Ted Danson.Copy !req
1228. I'm going for breakfast.
You want anything?Copy !req
1229. How about Bob Barker?Copy !req
1230. I'll see what I can do.Copy !req
1231. Howdy.Copy !req
1232. You steal that pig?Copy !req
1233. I heard she was wasting away
in this one-pig town, so...Copy !req
1234. And you thought you'd
come back and rescue her.Copy !req
1235. Yeah.
Something like that.Copy !req
1236. What makes you think
she'll take you back?Copy !req
1237. Because I love her.Copy !req
1238. Go back to Los Angeles.Copy !req
1239. I don't want Los Angeles.Copy !req
1240. I want you.Copy !req
1241. You got great tonsils.Copy !req
1242. That ain't all.Copy !req
1243. I just thought of something.
I can collect that $ 10 from Nicholson.Copy !req
1244. - You lost that bet.
- I did not.Copy !req
1245. - Who says?
- Me.Copy !req
1246. - You have no say. You are the bet.
- The bet was for one week. You lost.Copy !req
1247. It's your word against mine.Copy !req
1248. You would sully my reputation
for 10 measly dollars?Copy !req
1249. Absolutely. I don't even
know what "sully" means.Copy !req