1. - You know that evil
Heavy MetalCopy !req
2. that your parents hate
you listening to?Copy !req
3. You know those lyrics
about hell and doom,Copy !req
4. demons ripping you
new orifices to shit out of?Copy !req
5. What if I told you
it's all reel?Copy !req
6. I know...Copy !req
7. I was there.Copy !req
8. - But wait.
Lets start at the beginning.Copy !req
9. It all started in Greypoint,Copy !req
10. the middle of ass-fuck nowhere.Copy !req
11. I had to shift here
after my mumCopy !req
12. went on a massive meth bender,Copy !req
13. and tried to suck off
a Santa ClausCopy !req
14. in a crowded mall.Copy !req
15. Mum got sent to a mental wardCopy !req
16. and I got stuck with my uncle.Copy !req
17. - My Uncle Albert
was balls deep into Jesus.Copy !req
18. He thought Ricky Martin
was heavy.Copy !req
19. He heard me cranking some
Disembowel/ed Corpse,Copy !req
20. and he hasn't slept for days.Copy !req
21. I brought about
the end of the world.Copy !req
22. Biggest dick move ever.Copy !req
23. - Stop struggling.
- Ow.Copy !req
24. - It won't fit.
- Ow. Ow.Copy !req
25. - Get up there. Oh...
- This is Dion.Copy !req
26. - And that is probably the
least embarrassing orificeCopy !req
27. that dice has been shoved into.Copy !req
28. - Wait...
Yes, it's in!Copy !req
29. - And this
is my dickhead cousin.Copy !req
30. - Hey, David...Copy !req
31. - He's hospitalized
more nerds than asthma.Copy !req
32. - I saw Uncle Albert washing
your sheets this morning.Copy !req
33. You shit the bed or something?Copy !req
34. - Fuckin' devil-worshiper.Copy !req
35. I can't wait until my dad
kicks you out on the streetsCopy !req
36. and you've got to blow
truck drivers for foodCopy !req
37. like your psycho mum.Copy !req
38. His Mum is a psycho.Copy !req
39. - Ow.Copy !req
40. - You all right, man?Copy !req
41. Here's your dice.Copy !req
42. - It's actually a die.
Dice is plural.Copy !req
43. Um, and it's a D10. But...Copy !req
44. - Thanks.Copy !req
45. - Jesus.
Who's that?Copy !req
46. - Oh, Medina Darcy.Copy !req
47. - Number one cause
of awkward boners in Greypoint.Copy !req
48. - Ahhh... no, dude.Copy !req
49. - What do you mean "no"?Copy !req
50. - No way are you tapping that.Copy !req
51. Chicks like that, they don't
go out with metalheads,Copy !req
52. they bang apes
like your cousin.Copy !req
53. Forget her, man.Copy !req
54. At lunchtime,Copy !req
55. do you want to do something
completely badass?Copy !req
56. And that's...Copy !req
57. eight points
of non-lethal damage.Copy !req
58. Exceeds your HP;
your cleric is unconscious.Copy !req
59. - No fucking way.Copy !req
60. How is it still breathing?
I cast a fireball.Copy !req
61. - You cast it at a Fire Troll.Copy !req
62. It's immune to fire.Copy !req
63. - This is bullshit.Copy !req
64. - Well, that's Giles.Copy !req
65. He was once suspendedCopy !req
66. for violating the
CPR training dummy.Copy !req
67. - I'm the DM, Giles.Copy !req
68. What I say goes, okay?
I am the law.Copy !req
69. - Yeah, this is
your problem, Dion.Copy !req
70. - Okay, yeah.Copy !req
71. - This is why no woman
will - will talk to you.Copy !req
72. - Hey, do you know what?Copy !req
73. A whole family of goblinsCopy !req
74. has just amassed around
your dead body.Copy !req
75. And one of them
is humping your foot.Copy !req
76. How do you like that?Copy !req
77. - How - how...Copy !req
78. - Ah!Copy !req
79. Hey.Copy !req
80. - Fuckin' nerds.Copy !req
81. - Oh Jesus.Copy !req
82. It's piss.Copy !req
83. - They - they sprayed us
with piss.Copy !req
84. Again!Copy !req
85. - Oh, the Player's Guide
is totally ruined.Copy !req
86. - My friends are losers,Copy !req
87. my uncle keeps trying
to christen me in my sleep,Copy !req
88. and I'm drenched in my
cousin's bodily fluids.Copy !req
89. - X minus one...Copy !req
90. X plus one...Copy !req
91. Good work, Brodie.Copy !req
92. Nice technique.Copy !req
93. Great shading on the
demon penises.Copy !req
94. Ah.Copy !req
95. Ha, is that me
having hot pokersCopy !req
96. stuffed up my rectum
by skeletons?Copy !req
97. - Yes, sir.Copy !req
98. - Mmm.
Nice likeness.Copy !req
99. Very detailed.Copy !req
100. Two weeks detention.Copy !req
101. - Silence!Copy !req
102. - So, that's me, Brodie.Copy !req
103. - Thus, X 6, X 5...Copy !req
104. - Fuck my life.Copy !req
105. - Fucking late again.Copy !req
106. Oh, Christ, it's my
Satanist cousin Brodie.Copy !req
107. Look at that ugly loner.Copy !req
108. I'm gonna make his life
hell on earth.Copy !req
109. - Wow.
That's really cool, David.Copy !req
110. Can you please
take me home now?Copy !req
111. - I thought we'd take
a drive or something.Copy !req
112. - Okay,
It's hard to believe,Copy !req
113. but talking about bullying
isn't really a turn on.Copy !req
114. - There was only one
cool thing about Greypoint...Copy !req
115. Alien Records.Copy !req
116. Byron sold the sickest vinyl,Copy !req
117. while his psychic girlfriend,
Abigail,Copy !req
118. told fortunes to
bored housewivesCopy !req
119. - Welcome to Alien Records.Copy !req
120. How are things, kid?Copy !req
121. - Things are shitty.Copy !req
122. - Check it out.Copy !req
123. - Oh, Haxan Sword?
Epic.Copy !req
124. - Yeah, man.Copy !req
125. It's only one of
666 ever printed;Copy !req
126. numbered in blood
by Rikki Daggers himself.Copy !req
127. Metal vinyl is over there
by that kid.Copy !req
128. - Fuck, yes.Copy !req
129. Now that's a record, man.Copy !req
130. - Yeah.Copy !req
131. I've actually been after
that one for a while.Copy !req
132. I'm Brodie, by the way.Copy !req
133. - Zakk.Copy !req
134. - After I met Zakk,
my life changed.Copy !req
135. - My mother was gonna
call me "Storm," though.Copy !req
136. - Rad.Copy !req
137. - I know.Copy !req
138. - He was a
tornado of chaos,Copy !req
139. leaving, ah,
a trail of destructionCopy !req
140. and teen pregnancies
in his wake.Copy !req
141. - Zakk got expelled afterCopy !req
142. stabbing a kid
with a math compassCopy !req
143. because he stepped on his
King Diamond tape.Copy !req
144. Or was it a setsquare?Copy !req
145. He used to help his
Dad at the car workshop.Copy !req
146. But mainly he just stole
anything not bolted onCopy !req
147. and then unbolted the rest.Copy !req
148. - Yeah. Fuck you too, Bono.Copy !req
149. - Hey man...Copy !req
150. you want to do
something crazy?Copy !req
151. - It's not role-playing is it'?Copy !req
152. - What the fuck
is role-playing?Copy !req
153. - Zakk played bassCopy !req
154. so we started a band.Copy !req
155. - Hey.Copy !req
156. This is, ah, Giles and Dion.Copy !req
157. - Hey.
- Hey.Copy !req
158. - Right, first things first.Copy !req
159. What are we called?Copy !req
160. - Um... Murder Boner?Copy !req
161. - Toothed Vagina.Copy !req
162. - Oh, Maggot Sperm.Copy !req
163. - Cannibal Unicorn.Copy !req
164. - How about like,
thirteen S's.Copy !req
165. You know, like...Copy !req
166. - Got it. Got it.Copy !req
167. DEATHGASM.Copy !req
168. All spelled in capitals.Copy !req
169. Lower case is for pussies.Copy !req
170. - Cool. What about...Copy !req
171. - I fuckin' said...Copy !req
172. DEATHGASM!Copy !req
173. - Solo!
Fuckin' shred it!Copy !req
174. - Dude, I thought you said
you could play.Copy !req
175. - Sorry.Copy !req
176. Ah... I can. I can.Copy !req
177. I'm just - I'm -
I'm just rusty.Copy !req
178. All right. From the top.Copy !req
179. - What?
Just mixing it up.Copy !req
180. - Where are we going?Copy !req
181. - It's a surprise.Copy !req
182. - What's the hell is that for?Copy !req
183. - Dude, chill out.
It's fine.Copy !req
184. - All right.
You stay here.Copy !req
185. You're lookout.Copy !req
186. - What?Copy !req
187. - Shit.Copy !req
188. Zakk?Copy !req
189. Zakk?Copy !req
190. - Oh shit!Copy !req
191. - Did you shit yourself?Copy !req
192. - Nice surprise.Copy !req
193. - Hey, whoa, whoa, whoa.
You're an accomplice, mate.Copy !req
194. Don't puss out on me now.
Come on.Copy !req
195. Check it out.Copy !req
196. - Oh shit.Copy !req
197. - Man, these guys were legends
back in the day.Copy !req
198. Check it out.Copy !req
199. - Oh.Copy !req
200. Rikki Daggers.Copy !req
201. - He was a maniac.Copy !req
202. Didn't he used to kill
live rabbits on stageCopy !req
203. with a crowbar?Copy !req
204. - No, man.
It was a claw hammer.Copy !req
205. - Wonder what
happened to him?Copy !req
206. - Spent all his money
on coke,Copy !req
207. hookers and Satanist shit.Copy !req
208. Last I heard he was
hiding out in some small,Copy !req
209. crappy New Zealand town.Copy !req
210. - No fuckin' way.Copy !req
211. - Yes fuckin' way.Copy !req
212. No fuckin' way.Copy !req
213. - Rikki Fuckin'
Daggers, man.Copy !req
214. - Shh.
Hey, this way.Copy !req
215. - Holy fuck.
Look at those amps.Copy !req
216. - Ah, they're old as hell.
Probably all busted.Copy !req
217. - Is that...?Copy !req
218. It's him.Copy !req
219. Is he dead?Copy !req
220. I bags that record.Copy !req
221. Dude, that's low.Copy !req
222. - I can go much lower.Copy !req
223. - Shh.Copy !req
224. Come on.Copy !req
225. - Check it out.
- No fuckin' way.Copy !req
226. - Motherfucker!Copy !req
227. - Whoa!
- Dude. Dude. Dude.Copy !req
228. Dude...Copy !req
229. - The record!
Drop it!Copy !req
230. Kick it back.Copy !req
231. Right. What the fuckCopy !req
232. - Chill.
- Are you two cunts...Copy !req
233. - doing in my house?Copy !req
234. - Let's get out of here.
Come on.Copy !req
235. - Don't you fuckin' move.Copy !req
236. - Aeon sent you,
didn't he?Copy !req
237. - When are you
occultist cuntsCopy !req
238. ever gonna fuckin learn?Copy !req
239. - No, we're just - we're just
metalheads.Copy !req
240. We're fans.Copy !req
241. Well, how did you find me?Copy !req
242. - Latest Death Scream, dude.Copy !req
243. You were outed.Copy !req
244. - Oh fuck.Copy !req
245. Fuck!Copy !req
246. We're all gonna die.Copy !req
247. - Shit, someone's coming!Copy !req
248. - Here. Take it.Copy !req
249. Take it!Copy !req
250. Hide it and guard it
with your life.Copy !req
251. - Come on, let's bail.Copy !req
252. - Let's bail.
- Fuck.Copy !req
253. - So you fuckers
finally found me.Copy !req
254. - Where is it, Daggers?Copy !req
255. Who were you talking to?Copy !req
256. I heard voices.Copy !req
257. - Why don't you go homeCopy !req
258. and tell Aeon
to fuck himself!Copy !req
259. It's a trap.Copy !req
260. Well, go on then,
do it, you fuckin' pussy!Copy !req
261. - Well, that was fucked up.Copy !req
262. - Dude, what the hell?Copy !req
263. It's a fucking
Rick Astley record!Copy !req
264. Fuck.Copy !req
265. - What the hell was that?Copy !req
266. - Weird.Copy !req
267. It's music.Copy !req
268. - Can you read it?Copy !req
269. - Yeah, I think so.
It's pretty universal.Copy !req
270. It's really old.Copy !req
271. Holy fuck.Copy !req
272. Look at the title.Copy !req
273. - What the fuck does it say?Copy !req
274. - Don't know,
I think it's Latin.Copy !req
275. - What, like,
Dora the fuckin' Explorer?Copy !req
276. - No. Like, like,
Romans and shit.Copy !req
277. - Dude...
We should learn this;Copy !req
278. turn it into a
DEATHGASM song!Copy !req
279. It'll be fuckin' brutal.Copy !req
280. - You want a beer?Copy !req
281. - Ah, yeah.Copy !req
282. - Vadin.Copy !req
283. - I found Daggers.
- Straight to it'?Copy !req
284. - Not even a,
"How are things, Aeon?"Copy !req
285. You're direct.Copy !req
286. I've always liked
that about you.Copy !req
287. - Aeon, the pages.Copy !req
288. - The Black Hymn, Vadin.Copy !req
289. Pages are just paper.Copy !req
290. The Black Hymn
is absolute powerCopy !req
291. Please, give it the
reverence it deserves.Copy !req
292. - Daggers didn't have it,
The Black Hymn.Copy !req
293. I think someone
got to it before us.Copy !req
294. - Oh.Copy !req
295. That's a shame.Copy !req
296. - There was a break in.Copy !req
297. The pages should be
in Greypoint somewhere.Copy !req
298. I just need more time.Copy !req
299. - Winners don't make excuses
for their failures, Vadin.Copy !req
300. They learn from them.Copy !req
301. - No. Please.Copy !req
302. - Take his fucking head off.Copy !req
303. - No!Copy !req
304. - Oh, come on,Copy !req
305. that's a custom made
Sartori rug! Idiots!Copy !req
306. You put a tarp down first.Copy !req
307. Do it again.Copy !req
308. Again!Copy !req
309. Do it again!Copy !req
310. That's good.Copy !req
311. Yeah, I think that worked.Copy !req
312. Get the car.Copy !req
313. We're heading into Greypoint.Copy !req
314. - Zakk - Zakk, that's good.Copy !req
315. Urn, Brodie,Copy !req
316. can - can you put your
foot up on that tree?Copy !req
317. Yeah.
But - but higher?Copy !req
318. Higher.Copy !req
319. - This is retarded.Copy !req
320. Our - our instruments
aren't even plugged in.Copy !req
321. Where the fuck is the sound
supposed to be coming from?Copy !req
322. - Trust me.Copy !req
323. This is gonna be
off the hook.Copy !req
324. Yeah, yeah.
No, that's good.Copy !req
325. Um, let's - let's head
to the next location.Copy !req
326. Fuck you, Dion.Copy !req
327. - Does anybody want
anything from the shop?Copy !req
328. - Condoms, Vaseline,Copy !req
329. jumper cables
and ammonium nitrate.Copy !req
330. - I don't think they sell
that combination of things.Copy !req
331. - See... Oh!Copy !req
332. - SonyCopy !req
333. Sorry.Copy !req
334. There you go.Copy !req
335. - Could I please have
my tampon?Copy !req
336. - Yeah sure.Copy !req
337. - Thanks.Copy !req
338. You're Brodie, right?Copy !req
339. - Yeah.Copy !req
340. - I'm Medina,
from maths class.Copy !req
341. - Right, you're David's
girlfriend, right?Copy !req
342. - You know what,
I was gonna get an ice cream.Copy !req
343. Did you want one?Copy !req
344. - Ah, yeah.Copy !req
345. Ah, yeah. I was just
helping these guys, urn...Copy !req
346. - Ah, we're - we're
all done here,Copy !req
347. dude, ah, catch you later.Copy !req
348. - Yeah, that'd be great.Copy !req
349. - Cool.Copy !req
350. - Sperminate her, dude!Copy !req
351. - So, um, the other day,
in maths...Copy !req
352. ah, Mr Capenhurst
is such a dick.Copy !req
353. - Yeah.
- Yep.Copy !req
354. - I, um, I saved this.Copy !req
355. Well,
I rescued it from the bin.Copy !req
356. You're a really good drawer,
like, really talented.Copy !req
357. I wish I could draw like that.Copy !req
358. - Okay-Copy !req
359. Thank you.
Thanks.Copy !req
360. - You know, I was -Copy !req
361. I was thinking about
getting a tattooCopy !req
362. it would drive my dad crazy.Copy !req
363. I should get you
to design it.Copy !req
364. Maybe that's lame.Copy !req
365. - No, of course.Copy !req
366. I mean, of course
I would help you design it.Copy !req
367. Not, "Of course
I think it's lame."Copy !req
368. - Okay-Copy !req
369. You know, I was thinking
about getting it just, urn...Copy !req
370. just here.Copy !req
371. - Yes...
good spot for it.Copy !req
372. - Or - or maybe here,
on my upper thigh.Copy !req
373. - Yeah, yeah.
Yes, yeah.Copy !req
374. Either - I mean, again,
both great areas - places.Copy !req
375. And hard decision.Copy !req
376. So...Copy !req
377. - So, you're in a band?Copy !req
378. - Yeah, I, um, I play,
ah, the guitar.Copy !req
379. I mean, axe.Copy !req
380. Um, do you,
do you like metal?Copy !req
381. - Um, isn't it just a bunch
of guys screaming?Copy !req
382. - No way.Copy !req
383. Well, apart from grindcore.Copy !req
384. And... death metal
is kind of like that.Copy !req
385. And deathcore, screamo,
pornogrind,Copy !req
386. black metal, mathcore,
thrash and mordorcore.Copy !req
387. - But apart from those.
- Mmm.Copy !req
388. - It's just not my thing.Copy !req
389. I don't really get it.Copy !req
390. - It's like,
when life sucks,Copy !req
391. and - and you feel alone
and empty.Copy !req
392. You stick on some metal
and life is better, because -Copy !req
393. because somebody else
knows the pain and -Copy !req
394. and the rage that you're
going through, you know?Copy !req
395. Urn, I'll - I'll -
I'll lend you a CD.Copy !req
396. You should - you should
have a - have a listen.Copy !req
397. Ah...Copy !req
398. - Oh.Copy !req
399. Ah, Anal Cunt.Copy !req
400. - Ah, ah...Copy !req
401. This one.Copy !req
402. - Awesome.Copy !req
403. Ah, these are really,
really old.Copy !req
404. How are they not
in a museum?Copy !req
405. - Where did you say you
got these again, dude?Copy !req
406. - I, um...
- Found them...Copy !req
407. - In a skip.Copy !req
408. - I'm warning you, Brodie.Copy !req
409. Stop that devil music now.Copy !req
410. - Shit, man.Copy !req
411. - Laters, bud.Copy !req
412. - Dude, you choked again.Copy !req
413. - Sorry, I, ah,
started panicking.Copy !req
414. - You ever
had that feelingCopy !req
415. where you can't breathe?Copy !req
416. Like there's a crushing
weight on your chest,Copy !req
417. and the room gets
really smallCopy !req
418. and your heart starts
beating insanely fast?Copy !req
419. - No, never had that.Copy !req
420. Oh, although this one time,Copy !req
421. this chick grabbed
my nuts too hard,Copy !req
422. and my splooge
came out red.Copy !req
423. Brotherhood of Steel?Copy !req
424. - Brotherhood of Steel.Copy !req
425. - Laters.Copy !req
426. - Whoa.Copy !req
427. - The expressionCopy !req
428. Three A plus two B
over two.Copy !req
429. When A equals threeCopy !req
430. and B equals four.Copy !req
431. Anyway, three A
plus two B equals two.Copy !req
432. Then A equals three.Copy !req
433. B equals four.Copy !req
434. - Hey, cuz.Copy !req
435. - The fuck do you want?Copy !req
436. Fuck.Copy !req
437. - Get him.Copy !req
438. - Fuck off, David.Copy !req
439. - What are you gonna do
about it, fudge packer?Copy !req
440. Tell my dad?Copy !req
441. He hates you, too.Copy !req
442. Fuck.Copy !req
443. - You go near my bitch againCopy !req
444. and I'll punch you in the
dick every morning.Copy !req
445. - Fucktard.Copy !req
446. - Rip Brodie's girlie
earring out.Copy !req
447. - No.Copy !req
448. No! No, no, no...Copy !req
449. - Come on.
Lay into him.Copy !req
450. - Are you stealing petrol?Copy !req
451. - No.
I'm stealing diesel.Copy !req
452. - Well, don't you feel guilty?Copy !req
453. - No.
Hold that.Copy !req
454. - You're Zakk right?
Brodie's friend?Copy !req
455. He - do you know
where he is?Copy !req
456. He skipped class
this afternoon.Copy !req
457. - Brodie?Copy !req
458. Oh yeah. He lost his dick in
a freak bandsaw accident.Copy !req
459. Tragic.Copy !req
460. - Okay...Copy !req
461. Urn... Well...Copy !req
462. Can you give him this?Copy !req
463. Oh.Copy !req
464. Don't read it.Copy !req
465. - Zakk?Copy !req
466. Where's Brodie?Copy !req
467. - He told me to
pass on a message.Copy !req
468. He's not interested.Copy !req
469. He's got other shit
going on.Copy !req
470. - Oh.Copy !req
471. Well, that's shit.Copy !req
472. - Yeah...Copy !req
473. well, I thought I'd
come down and tell you.Copy !req
474. Save up waiting all night,
freezing your tits off, eh?Copy !req
475. - Thank you for considering
the well-being of my tits.Copy !req
476. - You're welcome.Copy !req
477. Here.Copy !req
478. You're freezing.Copy !req
479. Swig?Copy !req
480. Helps take the
bullshit away.Copy !req
481. - Fuck it.Copy !req
482. - His mum is a psycho...Copy !req
483. - Are you gonna tell us
who gave you the shiner?Copy !req
484. - Won't matter soon.Copy !req
485. Let's just fuckin' do this.Copy !req
486. - Dude, you know
I have your back.Copy !req
487. Tell me who they are,
I'll fuck them up.Copy !req
488. - I'm fine.Copy !req
489. - All right. Well, if they
give you anymore shit,Copy !req
490. I know a trick, all right?Copy !req
491. Point down at their zipper,
and say,Copy !req
492. "Ooh gross,
your cock is hanging out."Copy !req
493. And then when they
look down... Boom!Copy !req
494. You punch them in the face.Copy !req
495. My dad taught me that.Copy !req
496. All right, ladies.
From the top.Copy !req
497. - Goddamn,
I have the worst headache.Copy !req
498. - Were we asleep?Copy !req
499. - Amps are buggered.Copy !req
500. - Guys...Copy !req
501. Guys, do I look different?Copy !req
502. More, like... more powerful?Copy !req
503. - You could be
weaker than before.Copy !req
504. - Something fucked up happened.Copy !req
505. Man, my head is throbbing.Copy !req
506. - Something went wrong.Copy !req
507. It didn't work.Copy !req
508. - What are you
talkin' about, dude?Copy !req
509. Wouldn't it be crazy if-Copy !req
510. if the music had something
to do with demons?Copy !req
511. - Demons?Copy !req
512. Demons?Copy !req
513. Demons? What?Copy !req
514. - Fuck!Copy !req
515. What do you want,
asshole?Copy !req
516. - Can you hear the trumpets,
Brodie?Copy !req
517. They're getting louder.Copy !req
518. The Blind One is coming.Copy !req
519. He's going to suck out
your intestinesCopy !req
520. for a thousand yearsCopy !req
521. and use your ribs
as toothpicks.Copy !req
522. - Urn... okay.Copy !req
523. - Did I mentionCopy !req
524. he's going to roast your
nuts over an open fire?Copy !req
525. While they are still attached,
of course.Copy !req
526. - Ah. No, Terry.
You didn't mention that.Copy !req
527. - Well, he is.Copy !req
528. - Mr Capenhurst,
are you okay?Copy !req
529. - Oh my God.Copy !req
530. Oh my God.Copy !req
531. - There was just
blood everywhere,Copy !req
532. from every hole.Copy !req
533. It was crazy.Copy !req
534. - Weird.Copy !req
535. - Yeah, it was mental, man.Copy !req
536. Medina, too. Just-
just totally ignored me.Copy !req
537. - Did she say why?Copy !req
538. - No.Copy !req
539. Feels like everybody
in my neighborhoodCopy !req
540. has gone insane.Copy !req
541. - This town has always
been fuckin' crazy.Copy !req
542. Probably the Illuminati,Copy !req
543. pouring fuckin' fluoride in
the water or something.Copy !req
544. What the fuck
is that noise?Copy !req
545. Dad?Copy !req
546. For fuck's sake.Copy !req
547. Dad?Copy !req
548. Dad?Copy !req
549. Dad, what the fuck
are you doing?Copy !req
550. Dad?Copy !req
551. What are you doing?Copy !req
552. - What's wrong with him?
Is he drunk?Copy !req
553. - I don't think so.Copy !req
554. Dad, talk to me.Copy !req
555. Look, I'm going to take this
t-shirt off your face.Copy !req
556. Yeah?Copy !req
557. Yeah, yeah, yeah,
yeah, yeah. It's okay.Copy !req
558. Fuck!Copy !req
559. - What the fuck is he doing?Copy !req
560. - Holy fuck!
- Whoa!Copy !req
561. - I can see you.Copy !req
562. - Oh fuck!Copy !req
563. - Brutal.Copy !req
564. - Should we check his pulse?Copy !req
565. - He has a fucking
engine for a head.Copy !req
566. I don't think he's gonna be
walking this one off, man.Copy !req
567. - Shit.Copy !req
568. Your Dad, I'm... Fuck.
I'm really sorry.Copy !req
569. - Fuck!Copy !req
570. You know,
it's weird butCopy !req
571. I think he would've
wanted to go out like this.Copy !req
572. - His eyes ripped out,
face grinded off,Copy !req
573. and then head mounted
under a car engine?Copy !req
574. - Totally.Copy !req
575. For whom the bell tolls,
old man.Copy !req
576. - Oh fuck.Copy !req
577. Fuck!Copy !req
578. Dude, dude,
I am so sorry.Copy !req
579. Fuck, man,
this is all my fault.Copy !req
580. Okay. Fuck.
I translated those pages,Copy !req
581. and - and - and
they were to do with -Copy !req
582. with summoning demons, okay?Copy !req
583. And now people
are turning crazy.Copy !req
584. Like, possessed crazy.Copy !req
585. - You knew that was
some black magic shitCopy !req
586. and you didn't fuckin' tell me?Copy !req
587. - I didn't want you
to think I was crazy.Copy !req
588. - It's a bit fuckin' late now,
isn't it'?Copy !req
589. This is fucking twisted, man.Copy !req
590. Fuckin' demons?Copy !req
591. - Abigail.
Fuckin' Abigail.Copy !req
592. You know, the - the chick from
the - from the record store,Copy !req
593. the psychic chick.Copy !req
594. She knows all about this stuff.Copy !req
595. We should go see her.Copy !req
596. - The lights are on.
They could still be here.Copy !req
597. - Well, I'm out of ideas.Copy !req
598. - Jesus!Copy !req
599. - These things suck.Copy !req
600. What are you... hey!
What are you doing?Copy !req
601. - Who brings a dice purseCopy !req
602. to a demon
apocalypse anyway?Copy !req
603. How do we stop
these things?Copy !req
604. - Shit.Copy !req
605. - Medina!
- What's up?Copy !req
606. - Sweet axe skills.
- Thanks.Copy !req
607. - I wanted to come up with,
like, a one-liner like,Copy !req
608. "You were axing for this"
or something.Copy !req
609. That would be really cool,
right?Copy !req
610. - That was pretty cool as is.Copy !req
611. I mean, the axe, and the...Copy !req
612. - Yeah.Copy !req
613. - Fuckin' awesome.Copy !req
614. - Abigail, we need to get
you to a hospital, okay?Copy !req
615. It's too late.Copy !req
616. It has possessed
their bodies.Copy !req
617. - Whoa.Copy !req
618. Is that Satan?Copy !req
619. - That is Aeloth,
King of the Demons.Copy !req
620. - Aeloth?Copy !req
621. Sounds like a badass.Copy !req
622. - These words
were in music pages.Copy !req
623. - The Black Hymn.Copy !req
624. You have it.Copy !req
625. - Have it'?Copy !req
626. We fuckin' played it.Copy !req
627. - Well, then you
have fucked us all.Copy !req
628. The possessed bodies,
they kill all in their pathCopy !req
629. in preparation for
Aeloth's ascensionCopy !req
630. on the next blood moon.Copy !req
631. On the Devil's Hour.Copy !req
632. - Oh shit,
the moon is red tonight.Copy !req
633. When is the Devil's Hour?Copy !req
634. - Three AM.Copy !req
635. - Wait.Copy !req
636. Three AM Pacific
or Eastern time?Copy !req
637. Do demons recognize
daylight savings?Copy !req
638. - When Aeloth returns,
his soul will fuseCopy !req
639. with that of a darkest
human host.Copy !req
640. - How can we stop him?Copy !req
641. - Do you still have
the Black Hymn?Copy !req
642. - Yeah, it's back at my Uncle's.Copy !req
643. - Well, then we can...Copy !req
644. - Oh shit!Copy !req
645. - Ah!Copy !req
646. - Have you guys
seen Brodie tonight?Copy !req
647. Everyone I've seen is either
dead or psycho-ed.Copy !req
648. - No sign.Copy !req
649. Ah, hey,Copy !req
650. my Dad said we should
head to the schoolCopy !req
651. in an emergency.Copy !req
652. It's, um, Greypoint's
civil defense centre.Copy !req
653. He's a warden.Copy !req
654. I mean, was until he...
got possessed and...Copy !req
655. ate Mum's skin off.Copy !req
656. - Dude, are you still
going on about that?Copy !req
657. It was hours ago!
Get the fuck over it!Copy !req
658. - Let's head to the school.Copy !req
659. We're not gonna
survive out here.Copy !req
660. - Oh, wait a sec.Copy !req
661. - Oh God.Copy !req
662. Let's hope the demons
can%read, eh?Copy !req
663. - You ready?Copy !req
664. Let's go.Copy !req
665. - We need you to destroy
the Vocavitque Rex Daemonia.Copy !req
666. - Destroy it?Copy !req
667. We came here to get it.Copy !req
668. - Those who performed
the Black HymnCopy !req
669. may try to reverse it
before Aeloth's ascension.Copy !req
670. - Can't you destroy it?Copy !req
671. - No!Copy !req
672. Only those who still have a
soul can touch the pages.Copy !req
673. I do not.Copy !req
674. - I have one condition.Copy !req
675. I want to become
Aeloth's vessel.Copy !req
676. It has to be me.Copy !req
677. - His soul will bind with the
blackest human soul nearby,Copy !req
678. a soul that will not
resist his power.Copy !req
679. - You! No! Please!Copy !req
680. No!Copy !req
681. - Now who doesn't
have a gag reflex?Copy !req
682. I pledge allegiance
to Aeloth the Blind.Copy !req
683. - Kill anyone
who gets in your way.Copy !req
684. You will be rewarded
with more powerCopy !req
685. than you can imagine.Copy !req
686. Find Brodie.
He is the key.Copy !req
687. - Before she died,Copy !req
688. Abigail was trying
to tell us something.Copy !req
689. - Maybe...Copy !req
690. Okay...Copy !req
691. Okay, we're gonna go back
to my place, all right?Copy !req
692. We're gonna get my guitar,
and the pages.Copy !req
693. I'm gonna try and play
this song backwards,Copy !req
694. Rob Halford style, man.Copy !req
695. I mean,
it makes sense, right?Copy !req
696. Reverse all this shit?Copy !req
697. - Fuck that.Copy !req
698. This town is shit.Copy !req
699. We're going up to the lookout,
rolling a three-skinner,Copy !req
700. cranking some SlayerCopy !req
701. and watching this town burn
to the fuckin' ground!Copy !req
702. - Dude, what about Medina,
Giles and Dion?Copy !req
703. They could all still be alive.Copy !req
704. - Those guys are dicks.Copy !req
705. Medina is never gonna
put out for you, man.Copy !req
706. You're never gonna get to
second base with that girl.Copy !req
707. - What?Copy !req
708. - You know. Anal.Copy !req
709. - Okay-Copy !req
710. Firstly, I don't want to knowCopy !req
711. what you think forth base is,
all right?Copy !req
712. But I'm going for
the music pages.Copy !req
713. Dude, fucking stop.Copy !req
714. Don't you give a shit
about anyone but yourself?Copy !req
715. - No, I don't.Copy !req
716. Fuck them.Copy !req
717. - Dude,
I do care about the Holden.Copy !req
718. Hey, Cocktopus!
You win.Copy !req
719. I'll take you to do the thing
with the music, or whatever.Copy !req
720. Dude!Copy !req
721. Come on. Get in.Copy !req
722. Come on.Copy !req
723. - Okay,Copy !req
724. so all the shit
is in my room, all right.Copy !req
725. But just watch out for
my Aunt and Uncle,Copy !req
726. because they hate you.Copy !req
727. And also...
they might be demons.Copy !req
728. - Right.
- Okay?Copy !req
729. - Oh shit.Copy !req
730. - But they are into
all that God shit, right?Copy !req
731. They'll be sweet, they'll just
pray themselves to safety.Copy !req
732. - No, no, urn...Copy !req
733. No, they were at home
when we played the song.Copy !req
734. Fuck.Copy !req
735. Look, they definitely
would've heard it, okay?Copy !req
736. Looks all clear.
I'll get the music.Copy !req
737. - You've been a bad boy,
Brodie.Copy !req
738. I can taste you from here.Copy !req
739. - Zakk!Copy !req
740. - Fuck!Copy !req
741. Shit.Copy !req
742. We need to arm up.Copy !req
743. - Does your uncle have a gun?
- I doubt it, man.Copy !req
744. - Fuck!Copy !req
745. Fuck.Copy !req
746. _ Fuck yes!Copy !req
747. I bet there are some
crosses in here.Copy !req
748. Or some bibles we
could bash them with.Copy !req
749. What the hell?Copy !req
750. - Ah, I think they're, um,
they're rosary beads? Yeah.Copy !req
751. - What part of church do they
crank this bad boy, Brodie?Copy !req
752. - Oh.Copy !req
753. - Hey, Brodie?
- What?Copy !req
754. - Oh fuck.Copy !req
755. Why would you do that?Copy !req
756. It's not working.Copy !req
757. These are a bit shit.Copy !req
758. - Hold them off.
- What?Copy !req
759. - Yes.Copy !req
760. Brodie!Copy !req
761. - No!Copy !req
762. No!Copy !req
763. No!Copy !req
764. No! No! Ah. No!Copy !req
765. Ah! No!Copy !req
766. - I'm going to eat your soul.Copy !req
767. - Fucking die!Copy !req
768. - No!Copy !req
769. No! Stop!
Please. No!Copy !req
770. No.Copy !req
771. No.Copy !req
772. - What... the fuck?Copy !req
773. - Pretty sure he
wasn't possessed.Copy !req
774. - What? Oh no.
Of course he was.Copy !req
775. Because when he
came in he said,Copy !req
776. ah, something about Satan.Copy !req
777. You didn't hear him
say that?Copy !req
778. Fuck!Copy !req
779. Hey, the pages
are blowing away.Copy !req
780. You have to help me...Copy !req
781. Oh sick, man.Copy !req
782. - What? They were like
that when I found them.Copy !req
783. - Come on.
We have to get the music.Copy !req
784. - All right, look,
I'm going to help you do thisCopy !req
785. but only because
you suck at it.Copy !req
786. Also it's kind of fun
stabbing shit.Copy !req
787. But we need to get
better weapons.Copy !req
788. Yeah?Copy !req
789. Brutal.Copy !req
790. - Brutal as fuck.Copy !req
791. - You're pretty good
at whacking guys off, bro.Copy !req
792. - Did you see that?Copy !req
793. I'm gonna go check it out.Copy !req
794. - Brodie, you've got
the page, let's go.Copy !req
795. Brodie!Copy !req
796. - Shit!Copy !req
797. Medina.Copy !req
798. - Brodie.Copy !req
799. HEY-Copy !req
800. - HEY-Copy !req
801. - We're just holed
up in - inside.Copy !req
802. " We?Copy !req
803. - When Medina was
killing those demonsCopy !req
804. I got a bit of a half-chub.Copy !req
805. - Look, let's get back
to the matter at hand here.Copy !req
806. Seeing as how you're in an
underground dwarven citadel,Copy !req
807. it looks as if it has
nested hinges, which are...Copy !req
808. - Oh... Brodie!Copy !req
809. - Told you they'd be okay.Copy !req
810. - No you didn't.Copy !req
811. You said they were
probably dead already.Copy !req
812. You wanted dibs
on his guitar.Copy !req
813. Ow.Copy !req
814. - I found these guys
outside your house.Copy !req
815. - You were looking for us?Copy !req
816. - Of course.
Ah, you got our note, rightCopy !req
817. - No. I didn't see any note.Copy !req
818. - Oh.Copy !req
819. - Who would have thought
that Mr Proctor'sCopy !req
820. rock collection would
come in handy?Copy !req
821. Oh gosh.
Your hand.Copy !req
822. - Oh, ah, it's okay.Copy !req
823. - No.Copy !req
824. - That's Zakk's jacket.Copy !req
825. When did you get that?Copy !req
826. - He, urn...Copy !req
827. He lent it to me.Copy !req
828. He stopped by the other night
to - to tell me that, um...Copy !req
829. you know, hmm?Copy !req
830. You weren't interested.Copy !req
831. - What?Copy !req
832. - The note that I gave
Zakk to give to youCopy !req
833. to meet me at the
park at 9:00.Copy !req
834. - No.
I didn't get that note either.Copy !req
835. So...Copy !req
836. did you guys hook up?Copy !req
837. Motherfucker!Copy !req
838. - Brodie, just leave it.Copy !req
839. - Fuckin' wanker.
You knew I liked her.Copy !req
840. - Calm the fuck down,
all right?Copy !req
841. I'm not even into her;
I was just bored.Copy !req
842. Oh well. That's supposed
to make it fuckin' better?Copy !req
843. What happened to
Brotherhood of Steel?Copy !req
844. You know what?Copy !req
845. Everyone was fuckin'
right about you.Copy !req
846. - You're a piece of shit.
- Fuck you!Copy !req
847. - You let this happen by being
such an insecure pussy.Copy !req
848. Yeah, that's right, walk away.Copy !req
849. Grow some
fucking balls, man.Copy !req
850. Motherfucker!Copy !req
851. - You motherfucker.
You knew I liked her.Copy !req
852. - Save it for the demons,
you two!Copy !req
853. - All right.Copy !req
854. All right.Copy !req
855. FUCK you!Copy !req
856. I never even liked you.Copy !req
857. Good luck
fighting evil without me.Copy !req
858. You're all gonna fuckin' die.Copy !req
859. Death to false metal!Copy !req
860. - I expected this.Copy !req
861. He's Chaotic Neutral
and you're Lawful Good.Copy !req
862. Your alignments are
just totally mismatched.Copy !req
863. - How are we gonna
play it backwards?Copy !req
864. It was hard enough
playing it forwards.Copy !req
865. - Will take a few goes.Copy !req
866. - Well, time isn't
exactly on our side.Copy !req
867. - And another problem:
when we first played the song,Copy !req
868. everyone in the neighborhood
got possessed first, right?Copy !req
869. " So?Copy !req
870. - Well, they were all
within earshot.Copy !req
871. But our amps blew up.Copy !req
872. - Right. Okay, so we need
some serious decibels.Copy !req
873. - Well, does the
school have any?Copy !req
874. - Are you kidding?Copy !req
875. Our whole music class had
to share the same recorder.Copy !req
876. I can still taste it.Copy !req
877. - I know a place
that has amps.Copy !req
878. Big ones.Copy !req
879. Not sure if they still work,
but it's our only chance.Copy !req
880. - Out there?Copy !req
881. It's gonna be crazy.Copy !req
882. And we don't have
a car without Zakk.Copy !req
883. - Zakk can eat my ass.Copy !req
884. We don't need him.
We can do it on our own.Copy !req
885. - Fuck yeah.Copy !req
886. Fuck yeah.Copy !req
887. - Let's tear shit up.Copy !req
888. Shh. Stay low.Copy !req
889. Come on.Copy !req
890. - Just chill, all right?
We're not demons.Copy !req
891. - Drop the weapons.Copy !req
892. Now.Copy !req
893. - Damn.Copy !req
894. I can't tell if I have a fear
boner or a boner-boner.Copy !req
895. - I didn't even say anything.
Hit him.Copy !req
896. - Listen, just let us go, okay.Copy !req
897. You don't know
what you're doing.Copy !req
898. The town is overrun
with fucking demons.Copy !req
899. - We know exactly
what we're doing.Copy !req
900. Give me the Vogue-catty
queff-wrecks-demony.Copy !req
901. - Um, it's actually pronounced
Vocavitque rex daemonia.Copy !req
902. That tongue wasn't
meant for Latin.Copy !req
903. - Oh! Come on!Copy !req
904. - The Black Hymn!
Where is it?Copy !req
905. - I don't know
what you talking about.Copy !req
906. - Ah, no.
- Ow.Copy !req
907. - Well?Copy !req
908. - Don't tell this Manson family
cumbucket anything, Brodie.Copy !req
909. - Okay, okay-Copy !req
910. - It's here.Copy !req
911. No!Copy !req
912. - Tie them up,
take them in the bedroom.Copy !req
913. They can be a live
offering for Aeloth.Copy !req
914. - No.
No, please, let us go.Copy !req
915. - You had your chance.Copy !req
916. You awakened Aeloth,Copy !req
917. pleaded with him to take
away your weaknessCopy !req
918. and vanquish your enemies.Copy !req
919. He would've given you
power, fame, fortune,Copy !req
920. and any woman you want.Copy !req
921. But you blew it.Copy !req
922. - Is that true, Brodie?Copy !req
923. You did all of this for power?Copy !req
924. - I didn't want this.
- Get them out.Copy !req
925. - Whoa, whoa, okay.
Okay, okay.Copy !req
926. - Do you think if we soil
our pants, they'll let us go?Copy !req
927. - I guess we'll find out soon.Copy !req
928. - ... In sanguine.
Intra in sanguinem.Copy !req
929. De caelo laceri.
Lacerato horrorem.Copy !req
930. Proin cursus meum.
Regnabunt autem in sanguine.Copy !req
931. Intra in sanguinem...Copy !req
932. - Hey, I never meant
for this to happen, okay?Copy !req
933. I just want to
let you know that.Copy !req
934. I was desperate.Copy !req
935. I just-
I felt so fuckin' powerless.Copy !req
936. - You are not powerless,
Brodie.Copy !req
937. You can still stop this.Copy !req
938. I know you can.Copy !req
939. - What was that, guys?Copy !req
940. - Shit.Copy !req
941. - There's something in there.Copy !req
942. - Which one of you cuntsCopy !req
943. wants to be
skull-fucked first?Copy !req
944. No.Copy !req
945. - You.Copy !req
946. - No, no, not me!
I need my skull for exams!Copy !req
947. - Sacrifice is a noble act,
you know.Copy !req
948. - Fucking old bastard.Copy !req
949. Oh my God.Copy !req
950. - Did you miss me?Copy !req
951. - I thought you were
off to the lookoutCopy !req
952. to watch the town burn?Copy !req
953. - Realized I couldn't
leave my mate in the shit.Copy !req
954. Not with all these
demons to mega-kill.Copy !req
955. Metalheads stick together,
right?Copy !req
956. - Whoa, wait.Copy !req
957. You decided that you
wanted to help us,Copy !req
958. and then you went
and applied makeup?Copy !req
959. Well, how long did that take?
What 10, 15 minutes?Copy !req
960. - It's not makeup,
it's fucking corpse paint.Copy !req
961. For going into battle?Copy !req
962. - Okay-Copy !req
963. Well, you look adorable.
It really brings out your eyes.Copy !req
964. - What's the plan?Copy !req
965. - Okay. I get my guitar.Copy !req
966. You guys get me to the amps.
Cover me.Copy !req
967. - But she ripped up the pages.Copy !req
968. Do you really think you can
play it from memory?Copy !req
969. - I have to try.Copy !req
970. - One more thing...Copy !req
971. can you quickly
pull me off?Copy !req
972. Oh right.Copy !req
973. - De caelo laceri.
Lacerato horrorem.Copy !req
974. - Metal up your ass,
motherfucker!Copy !req
975. - Ah!Copy !req
976. - No!Copy !req
977. - Where's Dion?Copy !req
978. - Well, he was
right behind us.Copy !req
979. He must have got lost.Copy !req
980. - There's only a few
fucking rooms.Copy !req
981. - Dion!Copy !req
982. - Fuck!Copy !req
983. - Giles!Copy !req
984. - Hurry, Brodie.Copy !req
985. - Trying-Copy !req
986. - Kill them all!Copy !req
987. - It's three AM.Copy !req
988. - Aeloth!
Come in to me!Copy !req
989. Fill me with your power!Copy !req
990. - So much power!Copy !req
991. This is fucking brutal.Copy !req
992. - What?Copy !req
993. - Oh fuck.Copy !req
994. You know, I'm not even sure
I'm in the right tuning.Copy !req
995. - So, dude, I'm thinking
about doing a BurzumCopy !req
996. and starting my own
solo project.Copy !req
997. - Medina!Copy !req
998. Run! Run!Copy !req
999. - I mean, you and
the rest of the bandCopy !req
1000. are just dead weight.Copy !req
1001. - Dude, zip up your fly.
I can see your dong.Copy !req
1002. - What?Copy !req
1003. You don't get it, do you?Copy !req
1004. You can't stop me.Copy !req
1005. I'm gonna destroy
this world of shit,Copy !req
1006. one maggot at a time.Copy !req
1007. - Medina!Copy !req
1008. - Look at it this way...Copy !req
1009. you're about to lose five kgs
without a crash diet.Copy !req
1010. - Fuck it.Copy !req
1011. - No, no, no, no.
That's not gonna work.Copy !req
1012. You have to play
The Black Hymn, fuckin' idiot.Copy !req
1013. - Zakk.Copy !req
1014. - Thanks, man.Copy !req
1015. The metal brought me back.Copy !req
1016. I'm trying to hold him off.Copy !req
1017. He's gonna destroy
everything.Copy !req
1018. - Dude, fight it.Copy !req
1019. You've got to be strong.Copy !req
1020. I mean, you're the
strong one, remember?Copy !req
1021. - I can't.
He's too powerful.Copy !req
1022. Finish me.Copy !req
1023. Quickly. Before Aeloth
takes over again.Copy !req
1024. - Man, I can't, I can't.Copy !req
1025. - You have to do it.
There's no other way.Copy !req
1026. Send him back to Hell.Copy !req
1027. Do it!Copy !req
1028. - Brotherhood of Steel, dude.Copy !req
1029. Brotherhood of Steel forever.Copy !req
1030. - I don't know, I just...Copy !req
1031. I can't stand mic cupping.Copy !req
1032. - Cannibal Corpse do it.Copy !req
1033. - No.
Barnes used to do it.Copy !req
1034. Fisher...Copy !req
1035. it's straight from the guts.Copy !req
1036. - Shit,
did I just get schooled?Copy !req
1037. - I'm a very fast learner.Copy !req
1038. - How's the tat?Copy !req
1039. - Mmm.Copy !req
1040. It's all healed up.Copy !req
1041. - I'll see you later.Copy !req
1042. - You really
thought this was over?Copy !req
1043. Time to die, Brodie!Copy !req
1044. - No, just kidding, dude.Copy !req
1045. - Zakk?Copy !req
1046. - So what's like being dead?Copy !req
1047. - Hell is awesome!Copy !req
1048. Like,
met some music legends:Copy !req
1049. Dio, Kurt Cobain,Copy !req
1050. Dimebag,Copy !req
1051. John Bonham,
Paul McCartney...Copy !req
1052. - Oh.Copy !req
1053. - Yeah, the true, true Mayhem
have reunited, too.Copy !req
1054. So cold, dude.Copy !req
1055. - Fucking brutal as.Copy !req
1056. - Anyway, the band.Copy !req
1057. You got to keep playing, dude.Copy !req
1058. - Yeah,
but everyone is dead.Copy !req
1059. We can't keep calling
ourselves DEATHGASM.Copy !req
1060. Doesn't feel right.Copy !req
1061. - All right then.
Well, change it.Copy !req
1062. How about...
Bandsaw Circumcision?Copy !req
1063. - lntesticide?Copy !req
1064. - What about, like,
Bestiality Bliss?Copy !req
1065. - Yeah, how about
Birth Canal Boat Riders?Copy !req
1066. - What about
The God Buggerers?Copy !req
1067. - How about
David Bain's Scrotum.Copy !req
1068. - Anal Bulimia?Copy !req