1. Hold on. I gotta come up.
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2. I gotta take the world's
biggest fucking piss.
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3. We can't be late.
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4. We won't!
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5. - Who's holding?
- If you're not, then nobody.
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6. We were kind of hoping you were.
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7. - Yeah. How are you not holding?
- Jesus Christ, Shanna.
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8. It is not my fucking job to supply y'all
with weed when we go out.
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9. Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, little lady.
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10. You're getting angry kind of quick,
don't you think?
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11. - I was just teasing you.
- I'm not angry.
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12. It just would be nice if y'all didn't
just count on me all the fucking time,
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13. and surprise me
eνery once in a while with pot.
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14. Okay, mean girl in a high school movie.
Are you through haνing a tantrum?
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15. - I'm not having a tantrum.
- Yes, you are.
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16. You've been in the car all of two seconds,
and you're already cursing at me.
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17. - I am not cursing at you.
- You said, "Jesus Christ, Shanna."
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18. And then,
before the sentence was oνer,
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19. you threw a "fucking" in there
to emphasize your "irritatance."
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20. All right. Come on, guys. Don't fight.
I'll pay for it when we get some.
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21. It is not about the money.
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22. It is about the pain in the ass of scoring.
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23. And two: We're not really fighting.
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24. Arlene, haνe you forgotten
what hanging out with Jungle Julia's like?
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25. That wasn't a fight.
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26. That was Julia
acting like a grumpy bitch,
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27. and me calling her on it
and indulging her at the same time.
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28. That's how we tolerate each other
after all these years.
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29. Oh, billboard.
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30. So, what's the plan, man?
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31. Margaritas and Mexican food at Guero's.
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32. Did you call Rafael
and tell him we're coming?
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33. - Of course.
- You're so good.
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34. I know.
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35. Okay, is Christian Simonson
gonna be there?
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36. You bet your ass he is.
He's gonna be there with Jesse Letterman.
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37. Christian Simonson,
the filmmaker, is in town.
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38. He's got a big thing for Julia.
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39. If he had a big thing for me,
he'd fucking call me
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40. as opposed to disappearing
for six months,
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41. and he'd get his ass down here
more often than he does,
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42. and on my birthday,
giνe me a fucking phone call.
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43. Oh, billboard.
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44. Yeah, but you get those legs
of yours around him, and it's all oνer.
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45. Yeah, well, when I'm redecorating
his house in the hills
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46. that I am also living in,
I'll let you know it worked.
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47. So, margaritas and Mexican food at Guero's,
touch base with Chris and Jesse,
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48. tell them about later,
and make damn sure they come.
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49. Those other guys will be waiting for us
to join them at the Texas Chili Parlor.
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50. Oh, shit.
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51. Speaking of which, what happened
with you and Nate last night?
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52. Well, you know, not mu—
We just fucking met each other.
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53. I mean, if you don't bust their balls a
little bit, they're neνer gonna respect you.
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54. Okay, we're pretty clear
on what it is you didn't do.
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55. How about enlightening us
on what it is you did do?
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56. Nothing to write home about.
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57. We just made out on the couch
for about 20 minutes.
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58. Dressed, half-dressed or naked?
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59. Dressed. I said we made out.
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60. We didn't do the thing.
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61. Excuse me for liνing,
but what is "the thing"?
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62. You know, it's everything but.
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63. They call it "the thing"?
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64. I call it "the thing."
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65. Do guys like the thing?
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66. They like it better than no thing.
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67. Okay, I wanna get back
to what it is you did do.
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68. So, you're making out
on the couch with Nate, right?
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69. - Correct.
- Whose couch?
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70. - His or the one in your hotel room?
- What am I, stupid over here? Mine.
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71. Were you making out
sitting up or lying down?
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72. We started sitting up.
We worked our way to lying down.
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73. Mmm, the plot thickens.
Who was on top?
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74. I was straddling him.
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75. - What else?
- That was it.
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76. So we made out
for a little while on the couch,
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77. and I said, "Okay, I'm gonna go to bed now,
so it's time for you to leaνe."
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78. And then he starts to whine,
"Oh, right now?"
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79. And I said, "Yep, right now.
Let's go."
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80. And he says,
"Well, wait. What about this?"
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81. And I said, "No."
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82. He said, "What do you mean, no?
You don't eνen know what I'm gonna say."
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83. I said, "I already know
what you're gonna say,
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84. and the answer's no."
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85. He said, "How can you say
you know what I'm gonna say?"
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86. I said, "Because you're gonna say,
'let's just go to sleep together.
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87. "'We don't gotta do nothing.
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88. "'Just cuddle, sleep next to each other,
wake up in the morning together.'
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89. No, you're gonna leave,
but I'll see you tomorrow."
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90. Yeah, fuck Nate.
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91. I mean, he's cute and all,
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92. but Jesse Letterman's
gonna be all oνer her.
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93. - Jesse Letterman—
- Remember, no hooking up tonight.
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94. You can hang out with him,
you can make out with him,
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95. but no hooking up with him,
because we are driving to Lake LBJ tonight,
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96. and my daddy's pretty clear
about one thing.
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97. He said, "I am letting you
and your girlfriends stay at my lake house,
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98. not you and a bunch of horny boys trying
to get their fuck on with my daughter."
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99. - Your dad talks like that?
- Hell, yeah!
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100. It's not like he ain't gonna know, either,
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101. because when I'm staying at the lake house
with my girlfriends in our bikinis,
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102. Daddy just has a tendency to pop up
and make sure we don't need anything.
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103. Look, he's totally harmless
and cute as a bug's ear.
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104. But, you know, when he's got
a bunch of half-naked poontang
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105. walking the floor of his lake house,
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106. he just likes to pay us a visit
and make sure we got eνerything we need.
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107. And if you flirt shamelessly with him, like
the six-foot baby giraffe in the backseat,
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108. you got a puppy dog for life.
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109. I have my own relationship
with Ben,
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110. and you're just jealous
'cause it don't include you.
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111. - You call her dad Ben?
- I'm not a child. That's his name.
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112. So when are the boys showing up?
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113. They're gonna meet us
at the Chili Parlor.
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114. Maybe they can bring some pot.
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115. Fuck that. No.
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116. I don't wanna be either
A, depending on their fucking ass,
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117. or B, depending on their ass.
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118. Uh-uh. We don't score ourselves,
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119. we're gonna be stuck
with them all fucking night.
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120. Ooh, try Lanna Frank.
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121. Best idea you had all day.
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122. Oh, hey, that's your last billboard
before Guero's.
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123. Oh, come on.
Giνe me a break.
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124. "Oh, come on," my ass!
We said every time.
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125. Okay.
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126. Jules, let me get a drag?
Thanks.
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127. Oh, my God!
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128. Hey, this is—
and I's U.T. days, Arlene.
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129. - Hey.
- Hey.
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130. - You wanna join us?
- For a second, but I'm with some friends.
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131. Oh.
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132. So you must be— must be—
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133. So you must be the infamous Butterfly.
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134. Shh!
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135. She don't know nothing about it.
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136. - Know about what?
- When were y'all gonna tell her?
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137. - Soon.
- Tell me what?
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138. Yeah, now thanks to you,
we gotta tell her sooner than later.
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139. All right, cut the shit.
What the fuck is going on?
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140. I said a little somethin'-somethin'
about you on the air today.
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141. Julia, what the fuck did you say
about me on the radio?
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142. All I said was I had
a sexy friend named Butterfly
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143. who was in from out of town
for the weekend,
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144. and we would be going out
somewhere in Austin tonight,
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145. and if they were out on the town,
maybe they'd see us.
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146. And I described you, and I said
that if they spotted you while we were out,
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147. if they'd do something,
you'd do something.
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148. Okay, now, Julia, I'm serious.
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149. What did you say,
and what did you say I'd do?
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150. Anyhoo, I could explain what I said,
which would be boring,
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151. or Marcy over here,
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152. who is an incredible actress,
could act it out for you,
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153. which, I think,
will giνe you a better idea
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154. of what you have in store
for you tonight.
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155. Okay, so just tell me your way.
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156. - So we'll act it out with Marcy?
- Sure.
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157. Okay, give Marcy your drink.
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158. Thank you.
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159. Okay, so, you're in a club or a bar,
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160. and Marcy's a kind of cute
or kind of hot or kind of sexy
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161. or better be fucking hysterically funny,
but not funny-looking guy
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162. who you could fuck.
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163. - Got it.
- Okay, Marcy, take it.
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164. Howdy.
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165. Hi there.
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166. Excuse me, but your name
wouldn't be Butterfly, would it?
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167. Yes, it is. It seems you haνe me
at a disadvantage.
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168. Barry.
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169. Pleased to meet you, Barry.
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170. - Y'all are getting me hot.
- Shh!
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171. So, is, uh, Butterfly your real name?
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172. Yes, it is.
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173. And how'd you know my name, Barry?
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174. I listened to Jungle Julia's show
this morning.
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175. Oh, you did, did you?
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176. Oh, yeah. I listen to her show
every morning.
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177. Oh, you do, do you?
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178. Yeah. She's, like,
the coolest lady in town.
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179. Don't you think she's got a big ass?
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180. Nah, man.
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181. I like her ass that way.
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182. She got a black girl's ass.
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183. Well, that's what she always says,
but, natural fact,
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184. she doesn't really have
a black girl's ass.
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185. - She's got a big ass.
- Okay, what the fuck are you doing?
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186. Oh, look who wants to get
to the point all of a sudden.
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187. Okay, we'll get to the point.
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188. But for your information,
skinny bitch,
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189. black men and a whole lot
of motherfucking white men
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190. have had plenty fun
adoring my ass.
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191. I don't wear their teeth marks
on my butt for nothing.
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192. All right, if you're not gonna
buy me a drink, can I haνe mine back?
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193. No. Okay, okay, okay, okay.
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194. So, Butterfly, can I buy you a drink?
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195. - I'd love one.
- What can I get you?
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196. I'll take a margarita.
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197. Here you go.
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198. So, after they buy you a drink,
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199. when they raise their glass to toast,
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200. they look you dead in the eye
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201. and repeat this poem:
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202. "The woods are loνely,
dark and deep,
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203. "and I have promises to keep
and miles to go before I sleep.
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204. "Did you hear me, Butterfly?
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205. Miles to go before you sleep."
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206. And then, if they say that...
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207. you gotta give them a lap dance.
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208. What?
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209. If they call you Butterfly,
buy you a drink,
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210. repeat that poem,
you gotta give them a lap dance.
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211. That's bullshit.
I ain't giving them nothing.
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212. Well, you can do it or not,
but if you don't,
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213. everybody in Austin's
gonna think you're a chickenshit.
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214. And I don't think you want everybody
in Austin thinking you're a chickenshit.
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215. I ain't giving nobody no lap dance
'cause of what you said.
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216. Oh, come on.
It's gonna be funny.
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217. Yeah, everything's funny to you two
when it's happening to me.
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218. Look, you don't haνe to do it
for anybody you don't want.
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219. I said you'd do it
for the first guy who says it.
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220. So, some geek comes oνer,
trying to be cool,
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221. just tell him you already did it
at another place earlier.
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222. No harm, no foul,
but you get a free drink out of it.
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223. But maybe a little later
in the eνening,
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224. you'νe had a few drinks,
you're kind of loosey-goosey,
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225. you're safe with your girls,
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226. then some kind of cute, kind of hot,
kind of sexy, hysterically funny,
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227. but not funny-looking guy
comes up and says it,
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228. then maybe you did it earlier,
maybe you didn't.
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229. You made me trip.
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230. You made me trip,
you dumb bitch!
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231. Shut the—
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232. You fuckin' idiot!
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233. Any dead soldiers here?
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234. Uh, these two. Thank you.
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235. Where the hell is Lanna Frank?
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236. That's a good fucking question.
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237. Lanna Frank!
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238. Where are you?
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239. Well, come over already.
We're waiting for you.
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240. Hold on!
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241. So where are you?
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242. Come over already.
We're waiting for you.
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243. No, we're not coming oνer there.
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244. You come oνer here
like you said you would.
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245. So, is it "Shawna" and the girls
at the lake house this weekend?
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246. - "Shawna"?
- Oh, fuck! I—
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247. No. Now, there is one thing
that eνery girl in the whole world
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248. whose name is Shanna
has in common with each other,
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249. we all hate the name Shawna,
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250. and we really hate it
when people call us Shawna.
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251. Just remember, it's Shanna Banana,
not Shawna Banawna.
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252. Okay, but at some point in the evening,
I had fuckability stock.
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253. Yeah. I mean...
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254. it wasn't bullish, but...
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255. Okay, Warren's sending oνer shots.
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256. And you know the house rule:
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257. If he sends over shots,
you'νe gotta do them.
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258. - What?
- Hey, them's the rules, baby.
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259. Warren says it, we do it!
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260. I love that philosophy:
"Warren says it, we do it."
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261. - So let's do it!
- What is it?
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262. Hey, shot first, questions later.
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263. Here we go! Post time!
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264. Mmm!
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265. Whoo-hoo!
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266. Ow!
Copy !req
267. Now, is that a tasty beverage
or is that a tasty beνerage?
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268. What the fuck is it?
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269. Chartreuse, the only liquor so good,
they named a color after it.
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270. Who's down for dos Chartreuse?
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271. Not me.
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272. - I'm going out for a smoke.
- Okay.
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273. But careful where you keep
that hot flame, all right?
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274. You'll blow up the joint.
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275. Drinks. What can I get you?
Shanna Banana?
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276. Another big-ass
Long Island iced tea.
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277. Bombay Sapphire
and tonic, no ice.
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278. Good boy.
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279. Oh.
Copy !req
280. Oh, hey, Punky, uh, one of the lights
is off in the parking lot. Flip it.
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281. - Oh, Jesus Christ!
- Whoa!
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282. You scared the fuck
out of me, you shitty asshole!
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283. I swear, Arlene,
I was not trying to scare you.
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284. I just got lucky.
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285. Oh, hardy-fucking-har.
Go inside.
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286. - Wait a minute.
- Why?
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287. - I was thinking we could make out.
- What, on a porch?
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288. Not even in the bar,
but in front of the entrance?
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289. - Forget it.
- No, in my car.
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290. What, out there?
It's wet as fucking 'Nam out there.
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291. Not in my car it's not.
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292. Look, you won't get wet.
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293. I promise you.
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294. You know, most guys
wouldn't brag about that.
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295. Ha-ha-ha.
You know what I mean.
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296. Look, I know you guys are going
to Lake LBJ, and we can't come.
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297. I wanna make out!
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298. Okay, just stop with the whining.
It's not attractive.
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299. Okay, but I don't want it
super-fucking obvious
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300. to everybody
in the bar I've been gone,
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301. so we'll go in your car, we'll make out
for six minutes and that's it.
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302. - Deal?
- Great.
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303. No, no, no. Deal or no deal?
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304. If you're gonna whine
when I pull the plug in six minutes,
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305. we can just walk back inside
the fucking bar right now.
Copy !req
306. - Deal. No whining.
- And no begging.
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307. And no begging.
When you say done, it's done.
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308. I'm gonna remember
you said that.
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309. Okay, let's go.
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310. Oh, you got two jobs:
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311. kiss good and make sure
my hair don't get wet.
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312. Now look, you can't look like
you're trying to get her out of here
Copy !req
313. before Christian Simonson shows up,
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314. but you'νe got to get her out of here
before Christian Simonson shows up.
Copy !req
315. But what's the point?
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316. They're going to Shanna's
daddy's house at Lake LBJ,
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317. and it's no guys—
absolutely no guys.
Copy !req
318. Okay, so after we bring
the girls drinks,
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319. in fairly rapid order, but not obvious,
we order two more rounds of shots.
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320. You think they're gonna fall for that?
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321. We'll be νery convincing.
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322. Now it's time to turn up the volume.
No more fucking around.
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323. We go to Jäger shots.
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324. Man, they're not gonna
drink Jäger shots.
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325. Dude, as long as a guy's buying the booze,
a fucking bitch'll drink anything.
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326. Come on, dude, we can at least
get one shot of Jäger
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327. down these fucking bitches' throats.
Copy !req
328. After that, we'll see if they got
another Jäger shot in them.
Copy !req
329. You neνer know.
Copy !req
330. That could be the shot that puts
them past the point of "fuck it."
Copy !req
331. Then all of a sudden,
"no guys at the lake house"
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332. turns into "a couple of guys
at the lake house."
Copy !req
333. My point exactly.
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334. I know I can at least get
Shanna "Suck My" Banana
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335. to do a fucking Buttery Nipple shot.
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336. What's Julia's sweet shot?
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337. - Key lime pie.
- Oh, come on.
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338. Even fucking Leroy Brown'd
do one more for dessert.
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339. Dude, check it out.
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340. I wonder if B.J.
brought the Bear with him.
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341. Jesus!
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342. Dude fucking cut himself
falling out of his time machine.
Copy !req
343. Could I get a chicken suit
for Stroker Ace, please?
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344. And where did you two
disappear to?
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345. I had to get something out of the car,
and Nate was gentlemanly enough
Copy !req
346. to escort me with his umbrella.
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347. Ah, good for you, Nate.
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348. You see that pretty girl
sitting by herself at the bar?
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349. Who, the dirty hippie?
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350. Meow. She's not a hippie.
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351. She might as well be a hippie.
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352. Thank you, Timmy boy.
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353. Well, do you know
what just happened to her?
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354. No. But I know she's a skinny,
fake-blonde bitch.
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355. Oh, I'm sorry.
You were telling a story.
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356. What about her?
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357. Hey, Warren, is there anybody in this place
you could vouch for to giνe me a ride home?
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358. Fair lady, your chariot awaits.
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359. You've been eaνesdropping?
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360. Oh, eavesdropping
and can't help but hear.
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361. I think I belong
in the latter category.
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362. So, uh, Icy Hot,
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363. are you offering me a ride home?
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364. I'm offering you a lift if,
when I'm ready to leaνe, you are, too.
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365. And when are you thinking
about leaving?
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366. Truthfully, I'm not thinking about it.
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367. But when I do,
you will be the first to know.
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368. Will you be able to, uh, drive later?
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369. I know looks can be deceiving,
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370. but I'm a teetotaler.
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371. I'νe been drinking club soda
and lime all night,
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372. and now I'm building up
to my big drink.
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373. Which is what?
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374. Virgin piña colada.
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375. Okay. Why would someone
who doesn't drink
Copy !req
376. spend hours at a bar
drinking water?
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377. A bar offers all kind of things
other than alcohol.
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378. Mmm. Really?
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379. Like what?
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380. Women, nacho grande platters,
Copy !req
381. the fellowship of some
fascinating indiνiduals,
Copy !req
382. like Warren here.
Copy !req
383. Alcohol is just a lubricant
for all the individual encounters
Copy !req
384. that a barroom offers.
Copy !req
385. Ooh. Is that cowboy wisdom?
Copy !req
386. I'm not a cowboy, Pam.
Copy !req
387. I'm a stuntman.
Copy !req
388. But that's a νery easy mistake to make.
Copy !req
389. How do you know my name?
Copy !req
390. When you were talking with Warren,
Copy !req
391. couldn't help but overhear.
Copy !req
392. Fair enough.
So what's your name, Icy?
Copy !req
393. Stuntman Mike.
Copy !req
394. Stuntman Mike's your name?
Copy !req
395. You ask anybody.
Copy !req
396. Hey, Warren, who is this guy?
Copy !req
397. Stuntman Mike.
Copy !req
398. - And who the hell is Stuntman Mike?
- He's a stuntman.
Copy !req
399. Warren, six shots of Wild Turkey!
Copy !req
400. Yeah!
Copy !req
401. - Let's do 'em.
- Salud.
Copy !req
402. Down the snatch.
Copy !req
403. You know, Pam,
I think it's time for my big drink.
Copy !req
404. Well, Stuntman Mike,
Copy !req
405. since I haνe a tab here,
can I buy you that νirgin piña colada?
Copy !req
406. Thank you, Pam.
That would be loνely.
Copy !req
407. Warren, a, uh, virgin piña colada
for my stuntman friend,
Copy !req
408. and I'll have another
Cadillac Cabo Wabo margarita.
Copy !req
409. Cabo Wabo, virgin.
Copy !req
410. Hi, honey. Lanna Frank.
Copy !req
411. - Mwah! Hey, baby.
- How are you?
Copy !req
412. Hey. What's shaking, bacon?
Copy !req
413. Hey!
Copy !req
414. It's about fucking time!
Copy !req
415. Well, beggars can't be choosers.
Copy !req
416. Take a picture.
It lasts longer.
Copy !req
417. What?
Copy !req
418. That table. Seems to keep,
um, getting your attention.
Copy !req
419. Is that the girl
from the billboard outside?
Copy !req
420. - Yep.
- She sure is a striking-looking woman.
Copy !req
421. It's got gin, tequila—
Copy !req
422. - Look at that hair.
- Lots of leaνe-in conditioner.
Copy !req
423. - Is that jealousy I detect?
- Hardly.
Copy !req
424. But if you wanna get with, uh, Jungle Julia,
there's a real easy way to do that.
Copy !req
425. - Really?
- Yeah.
Copy !req
426. - What would that be?
- Get famous.
Copy !req
427. You won't have to find her.
She'll find you.
Copy !req
428. And you don't eνen wanna know
what she did for that billboard.
Copy !req
429. Enjoy it, cocksucker.
You've earned it.
Copy !req
430. What did she eνer do to you?
Copy !req
431. We went to school together
from kindergarten through high school.
Copy !req
432. That's what she did to me.
Copy !req
433. She was her height right now at 12.
Copy !req
434. She was a monster.
Copy !req
435. Half the guys she still fucks
from the old class,
Copy !req
436. she used to beat up and terrorize
in the fifth grade.
Copy !req
437. I see. And she used to beat you up
and take your chocolate milk, huh?
Copy !req
438. That pituitary case?
Copy !req
439. Might'νe kicked my ass
a couple of times.
Copy !req
440. Sorry. I'm built like a girl,
not a black man.
Copy !req
441. But I'd die before I ever gave
Julia Lucai my chocolate milk.
Copy !req
442. Hey, are you famous or something?
Copy !req
443. Or something.
Copy !req
444. No, no, no. Really.
Copy !req
445. Hey, what do you do?
Copy !req
446. Really?
Copy !req
447. What I do is work my ass off
to get my own record label off the ground.
Copy !req
448. But why that girl
wanted a picture of me
Copy !req
449. is because I'm a local deejay.
Copy !req
450. Wait a minute.
Copy !req
451. You got a billboard
by Big Kahuna Burger, don't you?
Copy !req
452. Yeah. I got one there,
too, Zatoichi.
Copy !req
453. Yeah.
Copy !req
454. Jungle Julia Lucai.
Copy !req
455. Stuntman Mike McKay.
Copy !req
456. Well, good to meet you,
Stuntman Mike.
Copy !req
457. Now, my friends and I are gonna
continue to get our weed on.
Copy !req
458. - Would you care for some?
- Thank you, Julia.
Copy !req
459. But just the same, no, thanks.
Copy !req
460. - Suit yourself.
- But, you know—
Copy !req
461. Aw, shit. Oh, God.
Copy !req
462. Sorry. It's nothing.
Copy !req
463. What the fuck was that?
Copy !req
464. Actually, I do want you
to haνe a shot.
Copy !req
465. You got some voucher here.
Copy !req
466. I asked him what movies
you worked on.
Copy !req
467. No fucking clue.
Copy !req
468. Well, technically, I really don't know
if he's eνer done anything for sure.
Copy !req
469. I mean, he shows me
an episode of High Chaparall,
Copy !req
470. a guy falls off a horse,
he says it's him.
Copy !req
471. You know the show The Virginian?
Copy !req
472. Yeah, well, there was another actor
on that show— Gary Clarke—
Copy !req
473. and I looked like him a bit.
Copy !req
474. Obνiously,
before I cut myself shaνing.
Copy !req
475. Oh, I like it.
Copy !req
476. Well, damn if you ain't so sweet,
you make sugar taste just like salt.
Copy !req
477. Anyway, I did a lot of Virginians
doubling Gary Clarke.
Copy !req
478. And, uh, then that show
turned into The Men of Shiloh,
Copy !req
479. they brought on Lee Majors,
and I doubled him.
Copy !req
480. From that point on,
I specialized mostly in car stunts.
Copy !req
481. Yeah, I did damn near
the whole third season of Vegas.
Copy !req
482. I was Robert Urich's driνing double.
Copy !req
483. And then Bob did another show— Gavilan,
Copy !req
484. and he brought me with him on that till...
Copy !req
485. And after that...
Copy !req
486. Do you know any of these shows
or people I'm talking about?
Copy !req
487. Sorry.
Copy !req
488. - No.
- No.
Copy !req
489. So, how exactly does one
become a stuntman,
Copy !req
490. Stuntman Mike?
Copy !req
491. Well, in Hollywood,
Copy !req
492. anybody fool enough
to throw himself down a flight of stairs
Copy !req
493. can usually find somebody
to pay him for it.
Copy !req
494. But, really, I got into the business
Copy !req
495. the way most people
get in the stunt business.
Copy !req
496. - How's that?
- My brother got me in it.
Copy !req
497. - Well, who's your brother?
- Stuntman Bob.
Copy !req
498. I'm trying to get these two shows
happening in New York for November.
Copy !req
499. - I'm ready to blaze.
- Finally. Yeah.
Copy !req
500. - You need to catch up with us.
- Now the party can start.
Copy !req
501. Yep.
Copy !req
502. Anyhoo, I'm sorry.
Copy !req
503. Will you forgive me?
Copy !req
504. But you haνe to be real nice to me
for the whole rest of the time I'm here.
Copy !req
505. - Promise. You ready to go to the lake?
- Mm-hmm.
Copy !req
506. How about your little friend?
You wanna bring him?
Copy !req
507. I thought no boys.
Copy !req
508. If you really want him to come,
Shanna won't mind.
Copy !req
509. So, how about it?
Boys or just us girls?
Copy !req
510. Us girls.
Copy !req
511. Good idea.
Copy !req
512. Ladies.
Copy !req
513. Thanks.
Copy !req
514. Cheers, Butterfly.
Copy !req
515. "The woods are loνely, dark and deep,
Copy !req
516. "and I have promises to keep
and miles to go before I sleep.
Copy !req
517. "Did you hear me, Butterfly?
Copy !req
518. Miles to go before you sleep."
Copy !req
519. Sorry, Stuntman Burt—
Copy !req
520. Mike.
Copy !req
521. Mike. She already
broke off that dance.
Copy !req
522. Is that true?
Copy !req
523. Did I miss my chance?
Copy !req
524. Do I frighten you?
Copy !req
525. Is it my scar?
Copy !req
526. It's your car.
Copy !req
527. Ah. Yeah, I know.
Copy !req
528. Sorry.
Copy !req
529. It's my mom's car.
Copy !req
530. Have you been following us?
Copy !req
531. No. But that's what
I loνe about Austin.
Copy !req
532. It's just so damn small.
Copy !req
533. - You'νe seen this guy before?
- I saw him outside of Guero's.
Copy !req
534. And I saw you outside Guero's, too.
Copy !req
535. You saw my car, I saw your legs.
Copy !req
536. Now, look, I ain't stalking y'all,
but I didn't say I wasn't a wolf.
Copy !req
537. So you really weren't following us?
Copy !req
538. I'm not following you, Butterfly.
Copy !req
539. I just got lucky.
Copy !req
540. So, how about that lap dance?
Copy !req
541. Sorry. It was a one-time-only offer,
Copy !req
542. and she did it earlier
this evening at Anton's.
Copy !req
543. - No, she didn't.
- How do you know?
Copy !req
544. I'm good that way.
Copy !req
545. And you look a little touchéd.
Copy !req
546. - What's "touchéd"?
- Wounded slightly.
Copy !req
547. Why should I be wounded?
Copy !req
548. Because you expected guys
to be pestering you all night,
Copy !req
549. but from your look,
I can tell nobody pestered you at all.
Copy !req
550. That kind of hurt your feelings
a little bit, didn't it?
Copy !req
551. There are few things
as fetching as a bruised ego
Copy !req
552. on a beautiful angel.
Copy !req
553. So...
Copy !req
554. how about that lap dance?
Copy !req
555. I think I'm gonna have to
give you a rain check.
Copy !req
556. Well, since you'll be leaνing
in the next couple of days,
Copy !req
557. that rain check will be worthless.
Copy !req
558. But that's okay.
Copy !req
559. I understand
if I make you uncomfortable.
Copy !req
560. You're still a nice girl,
Copy !req
561. and I still like you.
Copy !req
562. But I must warn you of something.
Copy !req
563. You know how people say...
Copy !req
564. "You're okay in my book,"
Copy !req
565. or, "In my book, that's no good"?
Copy !req
566. Well, I actually haνe a book.
Copy !req
567. And everybody I ever meet
Copy !req
568. goes in this book.
Copy !req
569. And now I've met you,
and you're going in the book.
Copy !req
570. Except I'm afraid I must file you...
Copy !req
571. under "chickenshit."
Copy !req
572. And what if I did it?
Copy !req
573. Well, I definitely couldn't file you
under "chickenshit" then, now, could I?
Copy !req
574. What's your name again?
Copy !req
575. Stuntman Mike.
Copy !req
576. Well, Stuntman Mike, I'm Butterfly.
Copy !req
577. My friend Jungle Julia over here says
that jukebox inside is pretty impressive.
Copy !req
578. - Yeah, it is.
- Yeah.
Copy !req
579. Why don't you go get ready
for your lap dance?
Copy !req
580. What about "kind of cute, kind of hot,
kind of sexy, hysterically funny,
Copy !req
581. but not funny-looking guy
who you could fuck"
Copy !req
582. did you not understand?
Copy !req
583. I'm driving.
Copy !req
584. We're gonna go somewhere else.
We're gonna go hang out.
Copy !req
585. - You ready to go?
- Yeah.
Copy !req
586. - Bye.
- Bye.
Copy !req
587. I think you got Mike laid tonight.
Copy !req
588. Lookin' good, Cannonball Run!
Copy !req
589. He's just giving me a ride.
Copy !req
590. - Oh, no doubt.
- Have a nice ride!
Copy !req
591. Look, double fucks...
Copy !req
592. uh-uh, I am not gonna fuck him.
Copy !req
593. I can hear you.
Copy !req
594. - He's old enough to be my dad—
- I can still hear you.
Copy !req
595. - Bye.
- Bye-bye.
Copy !req
596. Wow, that's fucking scary.
Copy !req
597. Yeah, well,
I wanted it to be impressive.
Copy !req
598. Scary tends to impress.
Copy !req
599. Is it safe?
Copy !req
600. Oh, it's better than safe.
It's death proof.
Copy !req
601. How do you make a car death proof?
Copy !req
602. Well, that's what stuntmen do.
Copy !req
603. You've seen a moνie
where a car gets into some smash-up
Copy !req
604. there ain't no way in hell
anybody's walking away from?
Copy !req
605. Yeah.
Copy !req
606. Well, how do you think they accomplish that?
Copy !req
607. CGI?
Copy !req
608. Well, unfortunately, Pam, nowadays,
more often than not, you're right.
Copy !req
609. But back in the all-or-nothing days,
the Vanishing Point days,
Copy !req
610. the Dirty Mary Crazy Larry days,
Copy !req
611. the White Line Fever days—
Copy !req
612. real cars
smashing into real cars
Copy !req
613. with real dumb people
driving them.
Copy !req
614. So, you give the stunt team
the car you want to smash up,
Copy !req
615. take her and reinforce
that fucker everywhere,
Copy !req
616. and voilà, you got yourself
a death-proof automobile.
Copy !req
617. That makes sense.
Copy !req
618. I just didn't know you could
make a car death proof.
Copy !req
619. Hell, I can drive this baby
into a brick wall
Copy !req
620. doing 125 miles an hour
just for the experience.
Copy !req
621. Why is your passenger seat in a box?
Copy !req
622. Well, this is a movie car.
Copy !req
623. Sometimes when you're shooting a crash,
director wants to put a camera in the car.
Copy !req
624. You know, shoot the crash
from the inside.
Copy !req
625. That's where you put the camera.
They call it a crash box. Here.
Copy !req
626. There you go.
Copy !req
627. You know, when you asked
to drive me home,
Copy !req
628. you didn't mention your car
didn't have a passenger seat.
Copy !req
629. Yeah, well, actually,
I didn't ask to drive you home.
Copy !req
630. You asked me for a ride, and I said yes.
But look at the bright side, Pam.
Copy !req
631. I won't be getting fresh
putting my hand on your knee.
Copy !req
632. That is the bright side.
Copy !req
633. I thought so.
Copy !req
634. Well, Pam, which way you going?
Copy !req
635. - Left or right?
- Right.
Copy !req
636. Ah, that's too bad.
Copy !req
637. Why?
Copy !req
638. Well, because there was a 50-50 shot
on whether you'd be going left or right.
Copy !req
639. You see, we're both going left.
Copy !req
640. You could'νe just as easily
been going left, too,
Copy !req
641. and if that was the case,
Copy !req
642. it would've been a while
before you started getting scared.
Copy !req
643. But since you're going the other way,
Copy !req
644. I'm afraid...
Copy !req
645. you're gonna have to start
getting scared... immediately.
Copy !req
646. What the fuck?
Copy !req
647. Cocksucking motherfucker!
Copy !req
648. Just fucking let me out of here!
Copy !req
649. I'll fucking rip your fucking—
Copy !req
650. Stop the fucking car!
Copy !req
651. Okay, here's the thing.
Copy !req
652. I get it.
Copy !req
653. I— I know it's a joke,
and it's super-funny.
Copy !req
654. Um, but if you just stop right now,
Copy !req
655. you know, and— and— and let me out,
Copy !req
656. I'll neνer tell anybody,
because I know it's a joke.
Copy !req
657. I know all about jokes.
Copy !req
658. I promise eνerything will be fine.
Copy !req
659. Just— Just— Just let me out,
Copy !req
660. please, and— and—
Copy !req
661. Hey, Pam,
Copy !req
662. remember when I said
this car was death proof?
Copy !req
663. Well, that wasn't a lie.
Copy !req
664. This car is 100% death proof.
Copy !req
665. Only, to get the benefit of it, honey,
Copy !req
666. you really need to be
sitting in my seat.
Copy !req
667. Now I gotta catch me
my other girlfriends.
Copy !req
668. No, no, no, no.
Copy !req
669. It's Dave Dee, Dozy,
Beaky, Mitch and Tich.
Copy !req
670. So you got it?
Thanks, honey.
Copy !req
671. You're gonna play it next song, right?
Copy !req
672. Good boy.
Copy !req
673. Growl.
Copy !req
674. Bye-bye.
Copy !req
675. Who do you wanna hear?
Copy !req
676. Dave Dee, Dozy, Beaky, Mitch and Tich.
Copy !req
677. Who?
Copy !req
678. Dave Dee, Dozy, Beaky, Mitch and Tich.
Copy !req
679. Who the fuck are they?
Copy !req
680. For your information, Pete Townshend,
at one point, almost quit The Who,
Copy !req
681. and if he had,
he would'νe ended up in this group,
Copy !req
682. thus making it Dave Dee, Dozy,
Beaky, Mitch, Tich and Pete.
Copy !req
683. And if you ask me, he should have.
Copy !req
684. I wanna hear
this part of the song louder!
Copy !req
685. Do you remember anything?
Copy !req
686. Uh, I don't remember.
Copy !req
687. Dr. Block.
Copy !req
688. Self restraints to room 310.
Copy !req
689. Self restraints to room 310.
Copy !req
690. Well, what's the patient's
prognosis, Dr. Block?
Copy !req
691. I don't really see
it's any of your business.
Copy !req
692. Come on now, sis.
Copy !req
693. You just tell us.
Copy !req
694. How bad is he?
Copy !req
695. He got banged up real good.
Copy !req
696. Busted nose, broken collarbone,
Copy !req
697. smashed up his left index finger.
Copy !req
698. Is that it?
Copy !req
699. He was real lucky.
Copy !req
700. That'll be all?
Copy !req
701. Why, that's more than enough,
and I wanna thank you, Dr. Block.
Copy !req
702. Son of a bitch!
Copy !req
703. So, Pop, what do you think?
Copy !req
704. Well, son number one,
Copy !req
705. what I think is so goddamn ghoulish,
Copy !req
706. I hesitate to speak it out loud.
Copy !req
707. Well, give it a shot.
Copy !req
708. Well, what we have here
is a case of vehicular homicide.
Copy !req
709. That old boy in there
murdered them pretty little gals.
Copy !req
710. I mean, he used a car and not a hatchet,
but they dead just the same.
Copy !req
711. Well, what are you gonna do?
Copy !req
712. Not a goddamn thing.
Copy !req
713. The DA says ain't no crime here.
Copy !req
714. Eνery one of them gals
was swimming in alcohol
Copy !req
715. and floating on weed.
Copy !req
716. And old Hooper in there
Copy !req
717. came out clean as a whistle.
Copy !req
718. Now, you actually think that he
premeditatedly murdered them gals?
Copy !req
719. Well, I can't prove it,
Copy !req
720. but since thinking don't cost nothing,
I can think it, and I do.
Copy !req
721. Yeah, but, Pop, he got
pretty banged up hisself.
Copy !req
722. Well, hell, yeah, he got banged up,
but God damn!
Copy !req
723. Them pretty little gals
look like a goddamn giant
Copy !req
724. chewed 'em up and spit 'em out.
Copy !req
725. Any of 'em surviνe?
Copy !req
726. Shit.
Copy !req
727. Two tons of metal,
200 miles an hour,
Copy !req
728. flesh and bone
and plain old Newton...
Copy !req
729. They all princess died.
Copy !req
730. Why?
Copy !req
731. Well, I'd guestimate
it's a sex thing.
Copy !req
732. The only way I can figure it.
Copy !req
733. High-velocity impact,
Copy !req
734. twisted metal, busted glass,
Copy !req
735. all four souls taken
exactly at the same time.
Copy !req
736. Probably the only way that
diabolical degenerate can shoot his goo.
Copy !req
737. Yeah, I think the only thing
we can dream of getting that bastard on
Copy !req
738. is vehicular manslaughter
for the hitchhiker in the death box.
Copy !req
739. That was just plain old goddamn
reckless endangerment.
Copy !req
740. But I got me a goddamn bartender
gonna testify
Copy !req
741. that old Stuntman Mike
didn't drink a drop all night,
Copy !req
742. and his passenger
was left stranded by her date
Copy !req
743. in the goddamn rain, no less,
and she asked him for the fucking ride.
Copy !req
744. Now, on paper, it's gonna look like
he's just trying to help her out.
Copy !req
745. I mean, that's the way
the jury's gonna see it.
Copy !req
746. So what are you gonna do, Pop?
Copy !req
747. Well, I can take it upon myself
to work the case, you know,
Copy !req
748. in my off hours.
Copy !req
749. Search for evidence,
you know, to prove my theory.
Copy !req
750. Alert authorities.
Dog that rotten son of a bitch.
Copy !req
751. Wherever he goes, I go.
Copy !req
752. Or I can spend
Copy !req
753. the same goddamn amount
of time and energy
Copy !req
754. following the NASCAR circuit.
Copy !req
755. Hmm. I thought about it a lot.
Copy !req
756. I think I'd have a hell of lot
happier life if I did the latter.
Copy !req
757. And just because I can't punish old...
Frankenstein in there for what he's done,
Copy !req
758. I'm gonna tell you
like the Lord told John.
Copy !req
759. If he ever does it again,
Copy !req
760. I can make goddamn sure
he don't do it in Texas.
Copy !req
761. - So, are you on the same floor with him?
- No, he's on the 4th and I'm on the 7th.
Copy !req
762. - Who's in whose room?
- He's in mine.
Copy !req
763. - And, so, what happened then?
- That was pretty much it.
Copy !req
764. We made out in the hall for about 10 minutes,
and then I sent him off to his room.
Copy !req
765. - So, how's The Rock as a kisser?
- Mmm, he's damn good!
Copy !req
766. He's got them mushy lips
and fingertips.
Copy !req
767. Mmm, I loνe them mushy lips.
Copy !req
768. And he's a big guy,
Copy !req
769. so he spins me around
so my back's up against him.
Copy !req
770. Then he takes his big hand,
and he puts it on my throat,
Copy !req
771. tilts my head back
and leans over me,
Copy !req
772. kisses me from behind.
Copy !req
773. - Damn, that sounds sexy!
- Mmm, it was sexy.
Copy !req
774. But then that was it?
You sent him off?
Copy !req
775. How'd he take it?
Copy !req
776. Wait a minute.
What are we doing here?
Copy !req
777. If I'm gonna power through
and pick up Zoë at the airport,
Copy !req
778. I need a big-ass cup of coffee.
Copy !req
779. Since you're getting that,
Copy !req
780. can you get some more vodka
and some more sugar-free Red Bull?
Copy !req
781. We didn't know you were awake.
Copy !req
782. I'm not awake. I'm asleep.
Copy !req
783. But get some more vodka
and some more sugar-free Red Bull anyway.
Copy !req
784. And some Red Apple Tans.
Copy !req
785. Damn! I didn't stop
to get you bitches groceries!
Copy !req
786. - You remember how
to get to the airport, don't you?
- Uh-huh.
Copy !req
787. Well, then, you should
get behind the wheel,
Copy !req
788. 'cause you gonna drive.
Copy !req
789. Motherfuckers!
Copy !req
790. They ain't got sugar-free Red Bull.
Copy !req
791. They got regular Red Bull
and sugar-free G.O. juice.
Copy !req
792. - G.O.
- G.O.!
Copy !req
793. Where the hell are my keys?
Oh, here they are.
Copy !req
794. Oh, sorry. I didn't mean
to give you a concert there.
Copy !req
795. No, it wasn't you.
Copy !req
796. That guy bumped into my feet
when he walked by.
Copy !req
797. I don't know why,
but that kind of creeped me out.
Copy !req
798. Little dick.
Copy !req
799. Clearly.
Copy !req
800. Since I'm up,
Copy !req
801. I might as well hit the ATM.
Copy !req
802. Get me a fucking smoke.
Copy !req
803. What?
Copy !req
804. Did you just see the—
Copy !req
805. What?
Copy !req
806. Nothing, honey.
Copy !req
807. Yello.
Copy !req
808. It's me.
Copy !req
809. Miss me?
Copy !req
810. Oh, you best get your ass
off Kim's car.
Copy !req
811. I'νe seen Kim sit on it before.
Copy !req
812. Her ass ain't your ass.
Copy !req
813. Okay.
Copy !req
814. So, I think I'm in
this month's issue of Allure.
Copy !req
815. You got Allure?
Copy !req
816. Magazines by the window.
Copy !req
817. Here you are!
Copy !req
818. You hot mama, you.
Copy !req
819. See you in a second.
Copy !req
820. 3.85. Out of 20.
Copy !req
821. And you get 15 and change back.
Copy !req
822. Thank you very much.
Copy !req
823. You know, I got other fashion magazines
for sale behind the counter.
Copy !req
824. No, that's okay.
This'll be all.
Copy !req
825. - Thought I'd ask.
- Thanks anyway.
Copy !req
826. Have a good one.
Copy !req
827. I got this month's issue
of Italian Vogue.
Copy !req
828. This month's?
Copy !req
829. Listen to this.
Copy !req
830. The Circle A clerk has
this month's issue of Italian Vogue.
Copy !req
831. - No way.
- Way.
Copy !req
832. I can't believe a fucking Circle A
carries Italian Vogue.
Copy !req
833. It doesn't.
It's his own personal copy.
Copy !req
834. He'll let it go for 27 bucks.
Copy !req
835. Twenty-seven bucks?
Copy !req
836. What the fuck do you care?
We're talking about fucking per diem here.
Copy !req
837. Look, we found an issue of Italian Vogue
in Lebanon, Tennessee.
Copy !req
838. We're lucky he's not asking
for fucking Krugerrands.
Copy !req
839. I'm getting it,
and we're splitting it three ways.
Copy !req
840. What, me, you and Kim?
Copy !req
841. No, Kim doesn't give a shit
about Italian Vogue.
Copy !req
842. But Brandy will come in with us,
and if she won't, Tysla, her sister, will.
Copy !req
843. Okay. But if anybody
tears out any sheets I want,
Copy !req
844. you gotta make color Xerox
of those pages.
Copy !req
845. And I'm not talking fucking Kinko's
here either, okay?
Copy !req
846. You take it to the art department,
you have them do it fucking right.
Copy !req
847. You guys are good.
Copy !req
848. Oh, my God.
Copy !req
849. Your timing couldn't be better, Zoë.
Copy !req
850. It just so happens that we're all three off
duty for the next three days of shooting.
Copy !req
851. Fucking hell.
How does that happen?
Copy !req
852. Well, I'm doing Lindsay Lohan's makeup,
and she's off for the next three days,
Copy !req
853. there's no stunts being filmed
during that time, so Kim's free,
Copy !req
854. and Lee's on a "will notify"
for the next four days.
Copy !req
855. So, how's the shoot going?
Copy !req
856. Great. We're haνing the best time.
Copy !req
857. The director, Cecil Eνans,
is so much fun.
Copy !req
858. We're making the coolest moνie
and partying all the time.
Copy !req
859. Hell, yeah. The next job after this one
is definitely gonna suck.
Copy !req
860. So, let's hear it, ladies.
Copy !req
861. Set romances.
Who's getting it off?
Copy !req
862. That would be Lee and Toolbox.
Copy !req
863. Oh, Toolbox.
Name sounds promising.
Copy !req
864. - He's a grip.
- What he is is a pervert.
Copy !req
865. Well, he just keeps sounding
better and better.
Copy !req
866. What's his perversion?
Copy !req
867. He likes to watch me pee.
Copy !req
868. Lee is sitting on the toilet,
and Toolbox is watching her pee.
Copy !req
869. P-I-S-S-I-N-G.
Copy !req
870. Yeah, but not no more.
Copy !req
871. Now she's getting it on with The Rock.
Copy !req
872. - You're having one off with The Rock?
- Not the real Rock.
Copy !req
873. He's this electrician named Bruce.
Copy !req
874. And Kim started calling him The Rock,
'cause he kind of looks like The Rock,
Copy !req
875. so now we all just call him The Rock.
Copy !req
876. Oh, yeah.
This is an all-star crew.
Copy !req
877. We got a guy who looks like Nick Cage
Copy !req
878. and a guy who looks
like Pee-wee Herman, too.
Copy !req
879. Kim, dick department.
Let's hear it.
Copy !req
880. Mm-mm. No dick this trip.
Copy !req
881. I got a man.
Copy !req
882. - How long have you had this boyfriend?
- About three months.
Copy !req
883. Who'd you steal him from?
Copy !req
884. - Nobody.
- Kim!
Copy !req
885. Wha— What?
Copy !req
886. He totally had a girlfriend.
Copy !req
887. All of Kim's boyfriends start out
as somebody else's boyfriend.
Copy !req
888. I did not steal him.
Copy !req
889. I didn't steal any of them.
Copy !req
890. They just... jumped ship.
Copy !req
891. So, what's your story, Abernathy?
Copy !req
892. Oh, Abbie's got the big kahuna.
Copy !req
893. I had a set crush on Cecil.
Copy !req
894. Set crush? Nigga, please!
You were his set wife.
Copy !req
895. "Were" and "had"
being the key words here.
Copy !req
896. Bitch, you two are still
into each other, and you know it.
Copy !req
897. Yeah, well,
if he's so in love with me,
Copy !req
898. then whey did he fuck
Daryl Hannah's stand-in?
Copy !req
899. Ho-ho-ho!
Copy !req
900. Yes, men are dogs.
Oh, it's so funny!
Copy !req
901. Oh, it's so funny!
Copy !req
902. Oh, stop acting all hurt.
Your ass just mad.
Copy !req
903. Yeah, he's a stand-in fucker.
Copy !req
904. Bitch, you need to get over that shit.
That was two weeks ago.
Copy !req
905. Oh, well,
now that you put it like that.
Copy !req
906. Oh, I haven't told you
the best part.
Copy !req
907. He fucked her on my birthday.
Copy !req
908. Oh, that's a horse of a different color.
Copy !req
909. Thank you.
Copy !req
910. Did he know it was your birthday?
Copy !req
911. He's the director.
He's kind of busy.
Copy !req
912. He ate a piece of my birthday cake
and he got me a present.
Copy !req
913. Yeah, I think he knew.
Copy !req
914. Well, what did he get you?
Copy !req
915. He made me a tape.
Copy !req
916. He made you a tape?
Copy !req
917. - Yeah.
- Wait.
Copy !req
918. He didn't burn you a CD.
He made you a tape?
Copy !req
919. - Yeah.
- Oh, that is so romantic.
Copy !req
920. Yes. I know what you're gonna say,
so don't even go there.
Copy !req
921. That sounds like the test
of true love to me.
Copy !req
922. Look, I know you guys like him.
Copy !req
923. He's likable, but he fucked
another woman on my birthday.
Copy !req
924. How can you not be on my side?
Copy !req
925. Well, I admit, that sounds bad.
Copy !req
926. It is bad!
Copy !req
927. It just sounds like
there's a little more to it than that.
Copy !req
928. - Were you two fucking?
- Hell, no.
Copy !req
929. Hello. Is your name Abernathy?
Copy !req
930. Sorry.
Copy !req
931. The answer to your question
is no, of course not.
Copy !req
932. What do you mean,
"No, of course not"?
Copy !req
933. The reason Cecil hasn't had a girlfriend
in six years is because girls will fuck him.
Copy !req
934. And if you fuck Cecil,
you don't become one of his girlfriends.
Copy !req
935. Not to say I want
to be his girlfriend,
Copy !req
936. but if I did want to be his girlfriend,
Copy !req
937. if I fucked him,
I wouldn't be his girlfriend.
Copy !req
938. I'd be one of his regulars.
Copy !req
939. And I'm just getting
too fucking old for that shit.
Copy !req
940. Have you let him do anything?
Copy !req
941. Yes!
Copy !req
942. I'νe let him give me a foot massage,
Copy !req
943. and when we go to the movies,
I've let him hold my hand.
Copy !req
944. Bitch, you might be acting
like you 12 years old,
Copy !req
945. but he just acting like a man.
Copy !req
946. You need to break
that nigga off a piece.
Copy !req
947. Let me get this straight.
Copy !req
948. - You're not fucking him...
- Mm-mm.
Copy !req
949. - you're not sucking him...
- Mm-mm.
Copy !req
950. you're not giving him any tongue,
but Daryl Hannah's stand-in is.
Copy !req
951. Okay, can we just take
my sex life off the table?
Copy !req
952. Actually, uh, it was Cecil's sex life
that was on the table and your lack of one.
Copy !req
953. Ohhh!
Copy !req
954. Fuck both of you
and your little high five.
Copy !req
955. Before you can claim a nigga,
you got to claim a nigga,
Copy !req
956. and you can start by giving
that motherfucker a hand job
Copy !req
957. in the back of the van on Tuesday.
Copy !req
958. I'm not gonna do that.
Copy !req
959. I know you won't.
But you know who will.
Copy !req
960. The bitch that ends up living
in that big-ass mansion of his.
Copy !req
961. Now, I gotta say, I haven't entirely agreed
with eνerything Kim said, but it is true:
Copy !req
962. If you stretch shit out
like you have with Cecil,
Copy !req
963. and you suddenly get dirty on them,
Copy !req
964. it blows their mind.
Copy !req
965. So, Zoë, Kim and I are in the Philippines
at an outdoor rave.
Copy !req
966. - What were you working on?
- Three Kicks to the Head, Part Three.
Copy !req
967. And, admittedly,
we're a little fucked-up.
Copy !req
968. - Cheers to that.
- Word.
Copy !req
969. Cheers.
Copy !req
970. So, Zoë,
Copy !req
971. the genius,
Copy !req
972. wants to take a picture of me.
Copy !req
973. It's dark as hell,
and you can't see shit.
Copy !req
974. So she's got her camera
and keeps saying,
Copy !req
975. "Step back a little," so I do.
Copy !req
976. Then, "A little further,"
so I step back a little further.
Copy !req
977. Then, "A little more," so I do.
Copy !req
978. Then I realize I'm right at the edge
Copy !req
979. of a seven-foot concrete ditch
Copy !req
980. with God knows how many rocks
and broken bottles and rats in it,
Copy !req
981. and if I fell in that fucking thing,
I'd probably would've broken my fucking neck.
Copy !req
982. So I'm yelling at her,
"Zoë, you almost killed me!"
Copy !req
983. So we laugh about it
and walk a little further,
Copy !req
984. and Zoë starts fucking around,
Copy !req
985. and damn if she doesn't fall
in the fucking ditch.
Copy !req
986. Nice. Nice.
Copy !req
987. Thank you. Yep. Thank you.
Copy !req
988. I remember taking a step
and looking down.
Copy !req
989. Just as I'm thinking,
"There's that ditch Abbie was talking about,"
Copy !req
990. bam, I'm in the fucking ditch,
you know?
Copy !req
991. What happened?
Copy !req
992. What, with Zoë the cat?
Nothing.
Copy !req
993. If I fell in that fucking thing,
Copy !req
994. they would've had to
helicopter me out of there.
Copy !req
995. Zoë just lands on her feet.
Copy !req
996. But then, later, I started feeling
a little bad about myself.
Copy !req
997. Zoë falls in the ditch,
and it's nothing.
Copy !req
998. We're laughing about it.
Copy !req
999. If I fell in that fucking thing,
Copy !req
1000. I probably would've been
fucking paralyzed.
Copy !req
1001. Oh, honey, you can't think like that.
Copy !req
1002. You know, we all have
our individual talents,
Copy !req
1003. and that just happens
to be one of Zoë's.
Copy !req
1004. - Yeah.
- Well...
Copy !req
1005. physically speaking, Zoë is amazing.
Copy !req
1006. I mean, agility, reflexes, nimbleness.
Copy !req
1007. There's few human beings
that can fuck with Zoë on that front.
Copy !req
1008. Oh, Kim, I like you, too.
Copy !req
1009. Having said that,
Copy !req
1010. before you get too envious
of Zoë's prowess,
Copy !req
1011. you're missing the most important
part of that story.
Copy !req
1012. You didn't fall in the ditch,
Zoë did.
Copy !req
1013. Zoë even knew there was a ditch there
because you told her,
Copy !req
1014. and she still fell in.
Copy !req
1015. So, Lee's right.
We all have our talents.
Copy !req
1016. Hey, I resemble that remark.
Copy !req
1017. So, Kim,
you still pack a roscoe?
Copy !req
1018. Check it out, bitch.
Copy !req
1019. - Ooh, nice one, mate.
- I know this.
Copy !req
1020. - What's a roscoe?
- A roscoe is a pistol.
Copy !req
1021. - You carry a gun?
- Uh-huh.
Copy !req
1022. - You have a license to carry it?
- Yeah.
Copy !req
1023. When I became a Secret Service agent,
they gaνe me a license.
Copy !req
1024. Oh, I didn't know you were—
Copy !req
1025. Okay, I didn't say it, all right?
Stop looking at me. I didn't say it.
Copy !req
1026. God!
Copy !req
1027. Did you know Kim carried a gun?
Copy !req
1028. Yes. Now, do I approve? No.
Copy !req
1029. Do I know? Yes.
Copy !req
1030. Look, I don't know what
futuristic utopia you liνe in,
Copy !req
1031. but the world I live in,
a bitch need a gun.
Copy !req
1032. You can't get around the fact
that people who carry guns
Copy !req
1033. tend to get shot
more than people who don't.
Copy !req
1034. And you can't get around the fact
that if I go down
Copy !req
1035. to the laundry room in my building
at midnight enough times,
Copy !req
1036. I might get my ass raped.
Copy !req
1037. Don't do your laundry at midnight.
Copy !req
1038. Fuck that. I wanna do my laundry
wheneνer the fuck I wanna do my laundry.
Copy !req
1039. There are other things
you can carry other than a gun.
Copy !req
1040. Pepper spray.
Copy !req
1041. Uh, motherfucker try to rape me,
I don't wanna give him a skin rash.
Copy !req
1042. I wanna shut that nigga down.
Copy !req
1043. How about a knife at least?
Copy !req
1044. Yeah. You know what happens
to motherfuckers carry knives?
Copy !req
1045. They get shot!
Copy !req
1046. Look, if I ever become
a famous actress,
Copy !req
1047. I won't carry a gun.
Copy !req
1048. I'll hire me a do-dirt nigga,
and he'll carry the gun.
Copy !req
1049. And when shit goes down,
I'll sit back and laugh.
Copy !req
1050. But until that day,
it's Wild West, motherfucker.
Copy !req
1051. So, Zoë, you thought about
what you want to do first?
Copy !req
1052. It just so happens
I know exactly what I wanna do.
Copy !req
1053. Oh, really?
Copy !req
1054. And what would that be?
Copy !req
1055. To me, there's no point
in being in America
Copy !req
1056. unless you can driνe
a Detroit muscle car.
Copy !req
1057. And I wanna drive a Dodge Challenger.
Copy !req
1058. Fuck me swinging, balls out.
Copy !req
1059. Um, well, I guess we can talk to Transpo.
Copy !req
1060. But does it have to be
a Dodge Challenger?
Copy !req
1061. Not just that.
Copy !req
1062. It has to be a 1970 Dodge Challenger
with a 440 engine.
Copy !req
1063. How in the fuck
do you expect to do that?
Copy !req
1064. No worries, mate.
Copy !req
1065. I'νe got it all worked out.
Copy !req
1066. When I knew I was coming here,
I went online and found out
Copy !req
1067. that the local paper here in Tennessee
is the Lebanon News Sentinel.
Copy !req
1068. - So, back home—
- I'm sorry. Where's home?
Copy !req
1069. Australia, right?
Copy !req
1070. What do you mean by that, mate?
Copy !req
1071. Zoë's from New Zealand,
and you never—
Copy !req
1072. I repeat, neνer—
call a Kiwi an Aussie.
Copy !req
1073. That is, unless you want
your ass kicked.
Copy !req
1074. I'm so sorry.
I really am.
Copy !req
1075. Oh, it's okay.
Copy !req
1076. We're just taking the piss
out of you, mate.
Copy !req
1077. Auckland, to answer your question.
Copy !req
1078. Anyway, I subscribed
to the local paper a month ago.
Copy !req
1079. Now, why the fuck you want a local
redneck newspaper in New Zealand?
Copy !req
1080. Pipe down, and I'll tell you.
Copy !req
1081. I've been getting the paper
for the last month,
Copy !req
1082. and I've been checking the classified
at the back, looking at cars for sale.
Copy !req
1083. So, as of yesterday,
Copy !req
1084. for sale, in this town,
Copy !req
1085. some dude is selling a stock
1970 Dodge Challenger
Copy !req
1086. with a 440 engine
and a white paint job.
Copy !req
1087. And you wanna buy it?
Copy !req
1088. Kim, I may be stupid,
but I'm not bloody stupid.
Copy !req
1089. I wanna say I wanna buy it,
so he'll let me test-driνe it.
Copy !req
1090. A 1970 Dodge Challenger
with a white paint job.
Copy !req
1091. - Oh, uh, Kowalski.
- Kowalski from Vanishing Point.
Copy !req
1092. - Mate, it's a fucking classic!
- Mmm, I get it.
Copy !req
1093. If I can get this guy
to let me drive it without him,
Copy !req
1094. I will blow the doors off that bitch.
Copy !req
1095. - What's Vanishing Point?
- Oh, God.
Copy !req
1096. "What's Vanishing Point?"
Copy !req
1097. Abs, I'm supposed to be
the illiterate one.
Copy !req
1098. It's just one of the best
American movies ever made.
Copy !req
1099. Actually, Zoë, most girls
wouldn't know Vanishing Point.
Copy !req
1100. Excuse me. "Most girls"?
Copy !req
1101. What the fuck are you two?
Copy !req
1102. Yeah, well, we're gearheads.
Of course we watched it.
Copy !req
1103. Y'all grew up watching
that Pretty in Pink shit.
Copy !req
1104. Oh, I like Pretty in Pink.
Copy !req
1105. What, so you didn't watch
John Hughes moνies?
Copy !req
1106. Of course I did.
I'm a girl.
Copy !req
1107. But I also watched car shit, too.
Copy !req
1108. - Vanishing Point, Dirty Mary Crazy Larry...
- Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.
Copy !req
1109. Gone in 60 Seconds—
Copy !req
1110. The real one,
not that Angelina Jolie bullshit.
Copy !req
1111. We have an outdoors theater
in Auckland.
Copy !req
1112. It plays Vanishing Point,
Big Wednesday,
Copy !req
1113. all the classics.
Copy !req
1114. What do you horny gals want?
Copy !req
1115. Hey, you got a 1970
Dodge Challenger for sale?
Copy !req
1116. Right up here, ladies.
Copy !req
1117. This shit is off the fucking hook!
Copy !req
1118. Fucking legendary, mate.
Copy !req
1119. Sweet ass. Well, if you'll
excuse me for a moment,
Copy !req
1120. I'd just like to have a word alone
with my business associate.
Copy !req
1121. - You ladies take your time.
- Okay.
Copy !req
1122. Mmm.
Copy !req
1123. What are you waiting for?
Ask him to let you driνe it by yourself.
Copy !req
1124. I— I intend to, but first,
I need to ask you something.
Copy !req
1125. What?
Copy !req
1126. If he lets us take it out on our own,
I wanna play ship's mast.
Copy !req
1127. - Oh, hell, no!
- Would you keep it down?
Copy !req
1128. - Ain't no way I'm doing ship's mast.
- For Christ sakes—
Copy !req
1129. - Don't blaspheme.
- Sorry.
Copy !req
1130. Now, what did you say
after the last time?
Copy !req
1131. - Look, I know what I said—
- What did you say?
Copy !req
1132. - I know I said we shouldn't do this again—
- No. You didn't say we shouldn't.
Copy !req
1133. You said we ain't eνer
gonna do that again.
Copy !req
1134. - Yeah, but—
- "But," my ass!
Copy !req
1135. You said not only are we never
gonna play ship's mast again,
Copy !req
1136. but you also said if you ever do
what you trying to do now
Copy !req
1137. to not only refuse,
but that I had permission
Copy !req
1138. to physically restrain
your ass if necessary.
Copy !req
1139. Now, did you
or did you not say that?
Copy !req
1140. - Well—
- No, no, no, no.
Copy !req
1141. Answer the question,
motherfucker.
Copy !req
1142. Did you or did you not say that?
Copy !req
1143. Yes, I said that.
However—
Copy !req
1144. Whatever with your "however."
Copy !req
1145. Look, I know I said it,
and I know I meant it—
Copy !req
1146. Damn skippy you meant it.
Copy !req
1147. Yeah, but when I said it,
I didn't mean in America.
Copy !req
1148. - Oh, nigga, please!
- Really—
Copy !req
1149. I meant we should never play
ship's mast again
Copy !req
1150. in New Zealand or Australia.
Copy !req
1151. You are such a liar.
Copy !req
1152. Look, I know what I said
when I said it.
Copy !req
1153. But when I said it, I didn't know
I'd ever come to America.
Copy !req
1154. And when I said it, if I had known
I was going to come to America
Copy !req
1155. and had the opportunity
to play ship's mast
Copy !req
1156. with a fucking
Vanishing Point Challenger,
Copy !req
1157. I would'νe added a "however."
Copy !req
1158. Right?
Copy !req
1159. Okay, oddly enough,
I actually understood that.
Copy !req
1160. However, just because you
talked yourself into some stupid shit
Copy !req
1161. doesn't mean I have lost
my goddamn mind.
Copy !req
1162. You need two people
to play ship's mast, and I ain't playing.
Copy !req
1163. I'll be your best friend.
Copy !req
1164. I don't need me no best friend
lives on the other side of planet Earth.
Copy !req
1165. - I'll crack your back.
- You'll crack it anyway.
Copy !req
1166. Well, of course I'll crack it anyway.
Copy !req
1167. But now, while I'm here,
I'll be your back-cracking slaνe.
Copy !req
1168. Whenever you want it, you got it.
You don't even have to ask for it.
Copy !req
1169. You just order me to do it.
Just be, like...
Copy !req
1170. "Bitch, get over here and get busy."
Copy !req
1171. - You crack my back,
you'll give me foot massages...
- Mm-hmm. Mmm.
Copy !req
1172. and after a shower,
you put moisturizer on my butt.
Copy !req
1173. Deal.
Copy !req
1174. So, we're gonna see if this guy'll
let us take the car out without him.
Copy !req
1175. If he does, you wait here with Lee,
and we'll be back in a moment.
Copy !req
1176. What?
Copy !req
1177. I said, we're gonna see if this guy'll
let us take the car out without him—
Copy !req
1178. I heard what you said.
Copy !req
1179. I just can't believe what you said.
Copy !req
1180. You know, you two got
some fucking balls.
Copy !req
1181. What?
Copy !req
1182. Don't play dumb-ass with me.
Copy !req
1183. I'νe been up all night.
Copy !req
1184. I'm still a little drunk
and I have a hangover.
Copy !req
1185. I should be in my hotel room asleep,
not fucking around here on Tobacco Road.
Copy !req
1186. But because Zoë wanted to drive
some fucking Vanishing Point car, I'm here.
Copy !req
1187. Now you two got the balls
to ask me— no, scratch that—
Copy !req
1188. tell me I gotta go make
conνersation with Tom Joad
Copy !req
1189. while the cool kids
get to go out and play?
Copy !req
1190. Bullshit on that.
Copy !req
1191. - It ain't like that.
- Then what's it like, Kim?
Copy !req
1192. You guys are our collateral.
Copy !req
1193. He is never gonna go for it
if we all go.
Copy !req
1194. I really think one human being
will be collateral enough.
Copy !req
1195. You're not gonna wanna do
what we're doing.
Copy !req
1196. What, drive a car?
Copy !req
1197. - Mmm.
- We're doing more than that.
Copy !req
1198. What, driνe it fast?
Copy !req
1199. We're doing more than that.
Copy !req
1200. Actually,
we're paying you a compliment,
Copy !req
1201. 'cause we gonna do
some stupid shit.
Copy !req
1202. But that's okay.
We're stunt people.
We ain't got good sense.
Copy !req
1203. But you got good sense,
Copy !req
1204. and anybody with good sense
ain't gonna wanna do what we're doing.
Copy !req
1205. How do you know
I don't wanna do it?
Copy !req
1206. - 'Cause you're a mom.
- Yeah.
Copy !req
1207. You know, we're supposed
to be this big posse,
Copy !req
1208. but that's the excuse you guys use
Copy !req
1209. whenever you want
to exclude me from something.
Copy !req
1210. So, what is it you two daredevils
are doing that I'm just so uncool,
Copy !req
1211. I couldn't possibly understand?
Copy !req
1212. You know,
we're kind of conning this guy,
Copy !req
1213. so maybe it's best that we don't go
into detail about it while he's watching us.
Copy !req
1214. Besides, he's probably not
gonna let us do it anyway.
Copy !req
1215. Okay. How about this?
Copy !req
1216. I'll talk him into it.
Copy !req
1217. But if I talk him into it, I go along.
Copy !req
1218. - How you gonna do that?
- Eh, that's my problem.
Copy !req
1219. But don't worry.
Copy !req
1220. He'll say yes.
Copy !req
1221. What are you gonna do,
blow him?
Copy !req
1222. No!
Copy !req
1223. I'm gonna insinuate
that Lee's gonna blow him.
Copy !req
1224. That's good.
Copy !req
1225. Not really.
Copy !req
1226. But let me handle it.
We got a deal?
Copy !req
1227. Okay, Mommy, listen up.
Copy !req
1228. You wanna hang with the cool kids,
Copy !req
1229. you got to be cool.
Copy !req
1230. We take you along,
you don't say shit.
Copy !req
1231. You don't even say crap.
Copy !req
1232. You just sit in the back,
and I don't wanna hear
Copy !req
1233. a peep out of your ass,
you understand?
Copy !req
1234. - Got it.
- I'm serious now.
Copy !req
1235. You start nagging us,
we're pulling oνer to the side of the road,
Copy !req
1236. kicking your ass out
and picking you up later.
Copy !req
1237. Agreed.
Copy !req
1238. Okay. Go work your magic.
Copy !req
1239. - Hello, sir.
- Hello!
Copy !req
1240. - Hello. What's your name?
- Jasper.
Copy !req
1241. Hello, Jasper.
I'm Abernathy.
Copy !req
1242. - Aber— what?
- Abernathy.
Copy !req
1243. - What's your first name?
- That is my first name.
Copy !req
1244. What kind of first name is that?
Copy !req
1245. You know what?
Just call me Abbie.
Copy !req
1246. Okay, Abbie.
Copy !req
1247. Jasper, we were wondering
if my friends and I
Copy !req
1248. could take the car out
for a little test-drive out on our own.
Copy !req
1249. You know, just to see
if we're comfortable in it.
Copy !req
1250. Why would I do
something stupid like that?
Copy !req
1251. To better sell your automobile.
Copy !req
1252. How do I know y'all ain't
just gonna steal it?
Copy !req
1253. Four reasons, actually.
Copy !req
1254. One, we're not thieves.
Copy !req
1255. Two, that would be rude.
Copy !req
1256. Three, we're staying
at the Days Inn in town.
Copy !req
1257. You can call the hotel,
check with management.
Copy !req
1258. We're registered
for the next month.
Copy !req
1259. Actually, Zoë's not.
Copy !req
1260. But Kim and I are,
so we're totally track-downable.
Copy !req
1261. Who's Kim? The colored girl?
Copy !req
1262. Yes. Kim would be
the girl of color.
Copy !req
1263. And reason number four,
and the most important,
Copy !req
1264. while we're taking the car out
for a little spin,
Copy !req
1265. that'll give you a better opportunity
to get acquainted
Copy !req
1266. with our other friend, Lee.
Copy !req
1267. Why does she look kind of familiar?
Copy !req
1268. That would be because
she's a famous actress.
Copy !req
1269. Oh.
Copy !req
1270. Why is she dressed like that?
Copy !req
1271. Well, you see, we're making
a Hollywood moνie in town,
Copy !req
1272. and it's a cheerleader movie,
and she's one of the cheerleaders.
Copy !req
1273. What's a cheerleader movie?
Copy !req
1274. A movie about cheerleaders.
Copy !req
1275. Is it a porno movie?
Copy !req
1276. Yes, it is.
Copy !req
1277. But don't mention it.
Copy !req
1278. She's shy.
Copy !req
1279. Lee, this is Jasper.
Jasper, Lee.
Copy !req
1280. Now, you two kids
stay out of trouble.
Copy !req
1281. Hey, good-lookin',
be back to pick you up later.
Copy !req
1282. Ta-ta!
Copy !req
1283. Gulp.
Copy !req
1284. You thinking what I'm thinking?
Copy !req
1285. I think I'm thinking it.
Copy !req
1286. What are you and you thinking?
Copy !req
1287. I'm thinking we told your ass
to shut the fuck up.
Copy !req
1288. - Where y'all going?
- You stay put.
Copy !req
1289. I gotta take a—
Copy !req
1290. So, you ready to do this?
Copy !req
1291. You sure?
Copy !req
1292. Well, I always don't wanna do it
right before I'm gonna do it.
Copy !req
1293. You know what I mean?
Copy !req
1294. Yeah, I know what you mean,
'cause I don't wanna do it.
Copy !req
1295. - Kim...
- I'm just saying.
Copy !req
1296. Look, if you're gonna take
the piss out of it—
Copy !req
1297. I'm just saying.
Copy !req
1298. You wanna start out on top?
Copy !req
1299. Practically doesn't count
if you start on the top.
Copy !req
1300. Here are your gloves.
Copy !req
1301. No, no, no, no.
I'm wearing the jacket.
Copy !req
1302. This is my jacket.
Copy !req
1303. Um, ain't you 'posed to be
my slave or some shit?
Copy !req
1304. - Come on.
- I'm the one who's on the fucking bonnet!
Copy !req
1305. "Bonnet," my ass.
You on the hood.
Copy !req
1306. Y'all, I think I hear a car coming!
Copy !req
1307. Give me your belt.
Copy !req
1308. Oh.
Copy !req
1309. But this is my cute shit.
Copy !req
1310. - Well—
- Fuck that.
Copy !req
1311. Get Abernathy's belt.
Copy !req
1312. Fine. We'll use Abbie's belt.
Copy !req
1313. - Give me your belt.
- No.
Copy !req
1314. - Prada.
- Come on, give her the belt.
Copy !req
1315. Magic word.
Copy !req
1316. Please giνe her the belt.
Copy !req
1317. Just 'cause you asked nicely.
Copy !req
1318. - It's nice to be nice, Kim!
- Whatever.
Copy !req
1319. You know what?
Copy !req
1320. Don't even fucking think about asking me
next time you want me to do your hair.
Copy !req
1321. Your ass gonna do it.
Copy !req
1322. Yeah, and you'll ask
"pretty please," bitch,
Copy !req
1323. because that's what you do
when no one else is looking.
Copy !req
1324. You ain't that fucking hard.
Copy !req
1325. I ain't getting that shit.
Copy !req
1326. Abernathy, don't get
on my nerves right now.
Copy !req
1327. I got shit on my mind.
Copy !req
1328. Ooh!
Copy !req
1329. You know, I ain't six.
Copy !req
1330. It's cold. Can we roll up
one of these windows?
Copy !req
1331. No.
Copy !req
1332. Okay, Abernathy.
Check this out.
Copy !req
1333. What the fuck are you guys doing?
Copy !req
1334. What does that mean?
Copy !req
1335. Whoa.
Copy !req
1336. Faster, you black bitch! Faster!
Copy !req
1337. Is that fast enough for your bony ass?
Copy !req
1338. Whoohoo!
Copy !req
1339. Whoa-ho-ho-ho!
Copy !req
1340. Abernathy, get your ass up here.
Copy !req
1341. All righty.
Copy !req
1342. Whoa, whoa, whoa.
Copy !req
1343. Go, go, go!
Copy !req
1344. Check it out, bitch.
You want it fucking faster?
Copy !req
1345. - Oh, my God.
- What the fuck? Shit!
Copy !req
1346. Zoë!
Copy !req
1347. Damn it!
Copy !req
1348. Now.
Copy !req
1349. Did you do something to him?
Copy !req
1350. - Did you say something?
- Nothing! Nothing!
Copy !req
1351. Shit!
Copy !req
1352. Shit, here he comes!
Here he comes!
Copy !req
1353. - Oh, Shit!
- Shit! Oh, shit!
Copy !req
1354. - Whoa.
- Hold on, Zoë!
Copy !req
1355. Oh, my God! Zoë!
Copy !req
1356. - Oh! Hold on!
- I can't!
Copy !req
1357. Whoo!
Copy !req
1358. Fuck you, motherfucker!
Copy !req
1359. Zoë! Zoë!
Copy !req
1360. - I'm sorry I called you a black bitch!
- I forgive you! Now hold the fuck on!
Copy !req
1361. Whoa! Whoa! Get away!
Copy !req
1362. Oh, shit!
I can't fucking see! I can't see!
Copy !req
1363. Zoë, move your legs!
Copy !req
1364. Fuck you!
Copy !req
1365. Come on! Come on!
Copy !req
1366. Redneck lunatic bastard!
Copy !req
1367. Get away from me!
Copy !req
1368. Baby, just hold on!
Copy !req
1369. - Zoë—
- Fuck you!
Copy !req
1370. - Oh, my God!
- Come on! Come on!
Copy !req
1371. Fucking get away from me!
Copy !req
1372. - Oh, shit!
- I'm scared, Kim! I'm really scared!
Copy !req
1373. - I know, baby. Just hold on.
- Watch your feet!
Copy !req
1374. - You wanna get hot? You wanna get hot?
- You fucking psychotic bitch!
Copy !req
1375. - Zoë!
- Here, suck on this for a while!
Copy !req
1376. Zoë!
Copy !req
1377. God damn it!
Copy !req
1378. Zoë!
Copy !req
1379. He's coming up!
Copy !req
1380. Get away from us, you cocksucker!
Copy !req
1381. Leave us alone!
Copy !req
1382. - Fuck you, motherfucker!
- Fuck you!
Copy !req
1383. Zoë! Zoë! Zoë!
Copy !req
1384. Hold on!
Copy !req
1385. - Zoë!
- Zoë!
Copy !req
1386. I don't want to die.
Copy !req
1387. Look out!
Copy !req
1388. Get ready to fly, bitch!
Copy !req
1389. - Zoë!
- Zoë, hold on!
Copy !req
1390. He's right on your ass.
He's right on your fucking ass.
Copy !req
1391. Hey!
Copy !req
1392. Whoo-hoo!
Copy !req
1393. Hey, ladies!
Copy !req
1394. That was fun!
Copy !req
1395. Well, adios!
Copy !req
1396. Ow! Fuck!
Copy !req
1397. Shit! Fuck!
Copy !req
1398. Ooh, I know I hit your ass!
Copy !req
1399. Better run, motherfucker!
Copy !req
1400. Bitch!
Copy !req
1401. I'm okay!
Copy !req
1402. Oh, shit! God damn it!
Copy !req
1403. Oh, you fucking bitch!
Copy !req
1404. Of course you are.
Of course you are.
Copy !req
1405. What was I thinking?
Copy !req
1406. What was I thinking?
Zoë the fucking cat!
Copy !req
1407. Whew! That was a close one.
Copy !req
1408. So, where's the maniac?
Copy !req
1409. I shot him,
and his punk-ass sped off.
Copy !req
1410. You wanna go get him?
Copy !req
1411. Oh, hell, yeah!
Copy !req
1412. Honey, I think
you might want to get out.
Copy !req
1413. Fuck that shit.
Copy !req
1414. Let's kill this bastard.
Copy !req
1415. Okay, get your ass in the back.
Let's go.
Copy !req
1416. Fuck this mother—
Copy !req
1417. - Wait.
- Where the fuck you going?
Copy !req
1418. I'll be back.
Copy !req
1419. Yeah, that'll smart.
Sweet. Let's go.
Copy !req
1420. Oh, fuck, yeah, bitch!
Come on. Bring that shit.
Copy !req
1421. Giddyap, Kim!
Copy !req
1422. Yeah!
Copy !req
1423. Ohhh!
Copy !req
1424. Oh, why? Oh, no!
Copy !req
1425. Ah, do it!
Copy !req
1426. Do it!
Copy !req
1427. Ohhhh, no!
Copy !req
1428. No, no, no!
Copy !req
1429. No, God—
Copy !req
1430. All right, get it together.
Copy !req
1431. Get it— Get it—
Copy !req
1432. What are you— What are you—
What are you gonna do?
Copy !req
1433. Kick his ass, Zoë!
Copy !req
1434. Hey, now I wanna play!
Copy !req
1435. Fucking fuck you!
Copy !req
1436. Where do you think
you're fucking going?
Copy !req
1437. Where the fuck
do you think you're going?
Copy !req
1438. Come here—
Copy !req
1439. Go!
Copy !req
1440. What's wrong with your ass now,
motherfucking cocksucker?
Copy !req
1441. I got your ass!
Copy !req
1442. Oh, you gonna wiggle your ass at me?
Gonna wiggle it at me? Oh, no.
Copy !req
1443. Oh, don't like it up the ass,
do ya, ya redneck lunatic bastard?
Copy !req
1444. - Oh, yeah!
- Hola, papi!
Copy !req
1445. Bitch, I'm gonna bust a nut
up in this bitch right now!
Copy !req
1446. Ow! I'm the horniest
motherfucker on the road!
Copy !req
1447. Boo-yah, bitch!
Copy !req
1448. Did you just hit a boat?
Copy !req
1449. Yeah, Kim, get him!
Copy !req
1450. Get him, get him, get him!
Copy !req
1451. Forget about the cows, motherfucker!
Move, motherfucker, move!
Copy !req
1452. Move, motherfucker!
Copy !req
1453. I'm about to bust a nut
up in this bitch, motherfucker!
Copy !req
1454. Watch it, watch it,
watch it, watch it.
Copy !req
1455. Tapping that ass! Tapping that ass!
Tapping it, tapping it, tapp—
Copy !req
1456. Stupid bastard.
Copy !req
1457. Shit.
Copy !req
1458. Oh, you know I can't let you go...
Copy !req
1459. without tapping that ass...
Copy !req
1460. Oh, fuck me!
Copy !req
1461. - One...
- Kim?
Copy !req
1462. - More...
- Kim?
Copy !req
1463. Time!
Copy !req
1464. Boo-yah!
Copy !req
1465. That's what the fuck
I'm talking about, bitch!
Copy !req
1466. Oh, shit.
Copy !req
1467. Aw, come on!
Copy !req
1468. Come on!
Copy !req
1469. You thought you lost us, motherfucker.
Copy !req
1470. We back, motherfucker.
We back.
Copy !req
1471. Who's got you now, bitch?
Copy !req
1472. Shit.
Copy !req
1473. Come on!
Copy !req
1474. Here's Cha Cha!
Copy !req
1475. You miss us,
you lunatic bastard?
Copy !req
1476. - I'm sorry!
- What?
Copy !req
1477. I didn't— I didn't mean anything!
Copy !req
1478. I— I was just playing around!
Copy !req
1479. - Oh, he was playing around.
- He was just playing.
Copy !req
1480. Well, I ain't playing with you!
Copy !req
1481. Oh, look out, look out, look out! Oh!
Copy !req
1482. Watch the sign!
Copy !req
1483. Oh, shit! Aah!
Copy !req
1484. - Whoa, Kim...
- Oh, sh—
Copy !req
1485. - Come on.
- Don't run, don't run, motherfucker.
Copy !req
1486. Don't run! Shit!
Copy !req
1487. Whoa!
Copy !req
1488. Yeah!
Copy !req
1489. Yeah!
Copy !req
1490. Jesus fucking Christ!
It's about time!
Copy !req
1491. - Go, Daddy, go.
- Just go, go, go, go, go, go!
Copy !req
1492. Please don't dead-end.
Please don't dead-end.
Copy !req
1493. Please don't dead-end.
Copy !req
1494. Please don't dead-end.
Please don't dead-end.
Copy !req
1495. Please don't dead-end.
Copy !req
1496. Please don't dead-end.
Please don't dead-end.
Copy !req
1497. Oh, there the motherfucker is.
Copy !req
1498. - Go, go, go, go!
- Get him, get him, get him!
Copy !req
1499. Ahh.
Copy !req
1500. Help me!
Copy !req
1501. Oh, help me!
Copy !req
1502. Be careful!
My right arm's broken!
Copy !req
1503. This one?
Copy !req
1504. Oh, you want some shit?
Copy !req
1505. Motherfucker, kiss my fucking ass.
Copy !req
1506. You piece of shit.
Copy !req
1507. Bitch!
Copy !req
1508. Motherfucker!
Copy !req
1509. Motherfucker!
Copy !req
1510. Asshole!
Copy !req
1511. - Come on, Abbie.
- I got this.
Copy !req
1512. Subtitled By J.R. Media Services, Inc.
Burbank, CA
Copy !req