1. Sue, don't misunderstand
me, please.Copy !req
2. Sue, I'm not complaining
about your work.Copy !req
3. I have your latest piece
right here in front of meCopy !req
4. and it's terrific, it's great.Copy !req
5. It's just that you were
due back here yesterday.Copy !req
6. Yeah, but Richard, there's one
more story I just have to do.Copy !req
7. There's always one more story.Copy !req
8. No, but would you listen to this?Copy !req
9. Last month this guy in
the Northern TerritoryCopy !req
10. was attacked by a crocodile.Copy !req
11. The thing bit his leg right off,Copy !req
12. left him there to die
100 miles from nowhere.Copy !req
13. A week later, he crawls
out of the bush,Copy !req
14. gets patched up and disappears.Copy !req
15. No interviews,
no pictures, nothing.Copy !req
16. - So?
- I tracked him down.Copy !req
17. He runs a safari business out of
somewhere called Walkabout Creek.Copy !req
18. And his name...Copy !req
19. Get this...Copy !req
20. Michael J. "Crocodile" Dundee.Copy !req
21. Sue, even if this
thing is for real,Copy !req
22. it could take you weeks
to nail him down.Copy !req
23. Will you trust me?Copy !req
24. I already made
arrangements to meet him.Copy !req
25. I've got a chopper meeting
the plane at Darwin.Copy !req
26. I'll be there tonight.Copy !req
27. Well...Copy !req
28. Okay.Copy !req
29. I really miss you, darling.Copy !req
30. I miss you, too, honey.Copy !req
31. Take care now.Copy !req
32. Don't worry. I'm a New Yorker.Copy !req
33. Hi.Copy !req
34. Walter Reilly, Never Never Safaris.Copy !req
35. I'm Mr. Dundee's business partner.Copy !req
36. Nice to meet you, Mr. Reilly.Copy !req
37. Oh, please, call me Walter.Copy !req
38. We're pretty informal in the bush.Copy !req
39. No, uh, let me.Copy !req
40. There you go.Copy !req
41. - You all right?
- Yes.Copy !req
42. I'm sorry that Mr. Dundee isn't
here himself to meet you.Copy !req
43. But he is here in town. Somewhere.Copy !req
44. Welcome to Walkabout Creek.Copy !req
45. Hmm.Copy !req
46. Oh, I took the liberty of
booking you into our hotel.Copy !req
47. I trust that's in order?Copy !req
48. Sounds just fine.Copy !req
49. There's just one other thing.Copy !req
50. Uh...Copy !req
51. You did say that you were
prepared to pay the $2,500?Copy !req
52. Absolutely.Copy !req
53. And I will see where he was
attacked and how he survived?Copy !req
54. Miss, I assure you, you're gonna
spend a few wonderful days here.Copy !req
55. Come on, fellas. Five bucks,
anyone who can make Donk spill it.Copy !req
56. So tell me, what's the
sideshow all about?Copy !req
57. Oh, that's just the boys
having fun and games.Copy !req
58. You see, Donk's never
spilled a drop.Copy !req
59. - We're a pretty tough breed up here.
- Mmm-hmm.Copy !req
60. Ooh!Copy !req
61. And your Mr. Dundee, does he...Copy !req
62. No, no, no. No, no,
he's very reserved.Copy !req
63. He's a legend up here.Copy !req
64. I mean, there he was out there
doing a quiet spot of fishing,Copy !req
65. when all of a sudden... Bang!Copy !req
66. This giant crocodile came up,Copy !req
67. turned him over, bit
half his leg off,Copy !req
68. dragged him down under.Copy !req
69. Killed it, of course.Copy !req
70. I mean, any normal man would have
just turned up his toes and died.Copy !req
71. But not our Mick. No.Copy !req
72. Hundreds of miles...Copy !req
73. Snake-infested swamps...Copy !req
74. On his hands and knees...Copy !req
75. He crawled right into Katherine.Copy !req
76. Straight past the hospitalCopy !req
77. and into the first pub for a beer.Copy !req
78. That story's getting better
every time you tell it, Wally.Copy !req
79. No, we handle ourselves pretty
well up here in the bush, Miss.Copy !req
80. But if you're talking legend...Copy !req
81. Oh, my God!Copy !req
82. Two beers, Ida.Copy !req
83. One for me, one for me mate.Copy !req
84. "One for your mate,"
you mad bugger.Copy !req
85. Oh, hang on.Copy !req
86. I'm sorry if that
frightened you, Miss.Copy !req
87. You see, it's stuffed.Copy !req
88. Him and me both, Wal.Copy !req
89. Michael J. "Crocodile" Dundee.Copy !req
90. Never Never Safaris.Copy !req
91. Yeah. Um, never go outwith us,Copy !req
92. if you do, you'll never
come back. Right, Wal?Copy !req
93. Sue Charlton, Newsday.Copy !req
94. Yeah, I thought you might be.Copy !req
95. Uh, here, Wal. Mind Cyril for meCopy !req
96. while I dance with this
charming young lady.Copy !req
97. Legend has it a crocodile
took half your leg off.Copy !req
98. Uh, well, a slight exaggeration.Copy !req
99. Um...Copy !req
100. More like a love bite, really.Copy !req
101. Anyhow, enough about me leg.Copy !req
102. Let me tell you about
the rest of me.Copy !req
103. Up north in the Never Never, where
the land is harsh and bare,Copy !req
104. lives a mighty hunter
named Mick Dundee,Copy !req
105. who can dance like Fred Astaire.Copy !req
106. Smooth shag, eh?Copy !req
107. What did you say the
name of this clown was?Copy !req
108. Mick Dundee.Copy !req
109. He's the bloke that was grabbed
by a croc on the Rapid River.Copy !req
110. What was he doing up there?Copy !req
111. It's full of crocs. What do
you reckon he was doing?Copy !req
112. Just a bloody poacher, eh?Copy !req
113. Listen, you do understandCopy !req
114. I want you to take me out
where you were attacked,Copy !req
115. show me how you survived.Copy !req
116. Oh, well, I don't know, just
the two of us out there alone?Copy !req
117. I've got me reputation
to think about.Copy !req
118. Hey, Dundee.Copy !req
119. Where can a man shoot a few
crocs around here, eh?Copy !req
120. How would I know, shit-for-brains?Copy !req
121. Just relax.Copy !req
122. Now, come on, Dundee.Copy !req
123. Every man and his dog
in the joint knowsCopy !req
124. you're nothing but a
bloody croc poacher.Copy !req
125. You better get your
men out of here.Copy !req
126. Oh, sorry about that.Copy !req
127. But I won't have anyone using bad
language in front of a lady.Copy !req
128. Bad language?Copy !req
129. Don't come back neither!Copy !req
130. What was he saying about
you being a poacher?Copy !req
131. Uh, he was just trying to
get a bite, that's all.Copy !req
132. Donk, tonight's me lucky night.Copy !req
133. You want to have a hit at the guts?Copy !req
134. Here's a go, fellas.
Good on you, Mick.Copy !req
135. Come on, guys, put
your money on me.Copy !req
136. Come on, Mick.Copy !req
137. Give me a kiss, Donk.Copy !req
138. I'm sorry. He's not
normally like this.Copy !req
139. I do apologize.
It's just the drink.Copy !req
140. You mean there's a serious
side to him? Hmm.Copy !req
141. I can hardly wait.Copy !req
142. Uh, comfortable, Miss?Copy !req
143. Wonderful country out here.Copy !req
144. We think so.Copy !req
145. Well, I hope you're not gonna
be the strong, silent type.Copy !req
146. - Me?
- Reluctant to talk about yourself?Copy !req
147. No. Favorite subject.Copy !req
148. Great. Why "Crocodile"?Copy !req
149. Wal's idea.Copy !req
150. He reckons it makes me more
colorful for the tourist business.Copy !req
151. How old are you?Copy !req
152. Don't know.Copy !req
153. Uh, what year is this?Copy !req
154. You don't know?Copy !req
155. Um, time doesn't mean
much up here, Miss.Copy !req
156. You see, um, the Aborigines
don't have calendars.Copy !req
157. I was raised by the local tribe.Copy !req
158. I asked one of the tribal
elders one day when I was born.Copy !req
159. And he said, "In the summertime."Copy !req
160. And is there a
Mrs. Crocodile Dundee?Copy !req
161. I was sort of married once.Copy !req
162. - Nice girl. Good cook. Big...
- Mick!Copy !req
163. Anyway, I went off on walkabout.Copy !req
164. When I came back, she'd gone.Copy !req
165. A walkabout?Copy !req
166. That's an Aboriginal habit.Copy !req
167. It means to, uh, wander around
and discover new places.Copy !req
168. How long were you gone?Copy !req
169. Couple months.Copy !req
170. Try 18.Copy !req
171. And she didn't wait?Copy !req
172. Strange girl.Copy !req
173. Yeah.Copy !req
174. Out of the way, dopey!Copy !req
175. Jesus...Copy !req
176. That was amazing.Copy !req
177. Mind over matter.Copy !req
178. Old bushman's trick.Copy !req
179. All right, Miss. All ashore.Copy !req
180. Now, I'm going to leave you
in Mick's capable hands,Copy !req
181. and I'll meet you at the Echo
Billabong on Wednesday.Copy !req
182. 2:20. We better get started.Copy !req
183. 2:20.Copy !req
184. Yeah. Yes. That's the way
that we do it in the bush.Copy !req
185. Uh, don't you worry, Miss.Copy !req
186. He's the best bushman
in the territory.Copy !req
187. Best pupil I ever had.Copy !req
188. You ready, lady?Copy !req
189. Ready as I'll ever be.Copy !req
190. Right, well, uh, till Wednesday.Copy !req
191. - Cheerio.
- Wednesday.Copy !req
192. - What's today, Wal?
- Monday.Copy !req
193. Doesn't know.Copy !req
194. Doesn't care.Copy !req
195. Lucky bastard.Copy !req
196. - You okay, lady?
- Oh, I'm fine.Copy !req
197. It's only about another
hour to the river,Copy !req
198. but you being a sheila,Copy !req
199. it'll probably take two.Copy !req
200. Well, I'll just do the best I can.Copy !req
201. Yeah.Copy !req
202. The water was running 20 foot up
the bank during the wet season.Copy !req
203. Here's what's left of me boat.Copy !req
204. Now you can see where
he sunk his teeth in.Copy !req
205. My God.Copy !req
206. How big was it?Copy !req
207. Uh, 16, 18 foot, maybe.Copy !req
208. And you were out here
hunting crocodiles in that?Copy !req
209. Nah, that's illegal.
I was just fishing.Copy !req
210. How did you get away?Copy !req
211. Uh, see, crocs don't
like fresh meat.Copy !req
212. He wasn't trying to
eat me on the spot.Copy !req
213. He just wanted grab hold of me and
take me down for a death roll.Copy !req
214. A death roll?Copy !req
215. Yeah. See, a croc will grab you,Copy !req
216. take you down to the
bottom of the water,Copy !req
217. and roll you over and over and
over till you stop kicking.Copy !req
218. Then he'll take you away to
his meat safe somewhere.Copy !req
219. A rock ledge, log,Copy !req
220. down under the water and
jam you under it...Copy !req
221. Tenderize you a bit.Copy !req
222. Good eating.Copy !req
223. Anyway, he wasn't happy
with the grip he had on me,Copy !req
224. so he let go to get a better
one, and I talked him out of it.Copy !req
225. Talked?Copy !req
226. And you were just out here fishing?Copy !req
227. Well, a barramundi's
a bloody big fish.Copy !req
228. It'll be getting dark soon.Copy !req
229. I'll take you to where I
camped the first night.Copy !req
230. You married?Copy !req
231. Was once...Copy !req
232. To the original rebel.Copy !req
233. What happened?Copy !req
234. You name it, we marched...Copy !req
235. Anti-nuke, women's lib,
save the whales.Copy !req
236. He's probably marching right now
for the gay Nazis or something.Copy !req
237. Hmm. Sounds like a prize ratbag.Copy !req
238. Oh, he meant well.Copy !req
239. Haven't you ever
protested anything?Copy !req
240. Sure. Every time I get
thrown out of the pub.Copy !req
241. Come on, I'm serious.Copy !req
242. I mean, where would someone
like you stand on,Copy !req
243. say, the nuclear debate?Copy !req
244. What do you think
about the arms race?Copy !req
245. None of my business.Copy !req
246. None of your business?Copy !req
247. How can you say that?Copy !req
248. It's everybody's business.Copy !req
249. Got to have an opinion.
Got to have a voice.Copy !req
250. Who's going to hear it out here?Copy !req
251. Okay.Copy !req
252. Something closer to home.Copy !req
253. Uh... The Aborigines.Copy !req
254. What do you think about their
claims to get the land back?Copy !req
255. Ah, well, you see,Copy !req
256. Aborigines don't own the land.Copy !req
257. They belong to it.Copy !req
258. It's like their mother.Copy !req
259. See those rocks sticking up there?Copy !req
260. Been standing up there
for 600 million years.Copy !req
261. Still be there when
you and I are gone.Copy !req
262. So arguing over who owns themCopy !req
263. is like two fleas arguing over
who owns the dog they live on.Copy !req
264. You see, uh...Copy !req
265. Uh...Copy !req
266. Aborigines, well, like
all God's creatures,Copy !req
267. they just want the right toCopy !req
268. roam across the earth
and be left in peace.Copy !req
269. It's that...Copy !req
270. Oh, it's a king brown.Copy !req
271. Poisonous?Copy !req
272. Oh, yeah. Deadly.Copy !req
273. Not bad eating,
but always give me gas.Copy !req
274. Uh, listen, are there any
more of those around?Copy !req
275. Oh, maybe the odd
one late at night.Copy !req
276. But stick close to me,
you'll be all right.Copy !req
277. Yeah, you're probably right, a
man should have an opinion.Copy !req
278. - I... Shh!
- What?Copy !req
279. Hmm. Thought I heard something.Copy !req
280. No, it's nothing.Copy !req
281. Good night.Copy !req
282. Mick?Copy !req
283. It's only me.Copy !req
284. Dangerous bastards.Copy !req
285. It's those city cowboys.Copy !req
286. What are you going to do?Copy !req
287. Nothing. Why?Copy !req
288. Why? They're shooting these
poor kangaroos for fun.Copy !req
289. There's no law against that.Copy !req
290. Keep your head down.Copy !req
291. Stay here.Copy !req
292. Hey. Ah, I need a piss.Copy !req
293. I need a piss!Copy !req
294. Yeah, and a straighter rifle.Copy !req
295. You're as useless as
tits on a bull, Duffy!Copy !req
296. Shh! Shut up, you guys.Copy !req
297. - Hey, Trevor.
- What?Copy !req
298. Trevor, get the spotlight
over here, mate.Copy !req
299. - Eh?
- The spotlight!Copy !req
300. Can't you see where you're aiming?Copy !req
301. Shut up!Copy !req
302. Not on me, you silly
bugger, on the bushes.Copy !req
303. Hey...Copy !req
304. Hey, look at this
big cheeky bugger.Copy !req
305. Hey! It's got a gun!Copy !req
306. Shit!Copy !req
307. Get out of here! Get going!Copy !req
308. Whoo-hoo!Copy !req
309. Good one, skippy.Copy !req
310. Despite the rugged
beauty of this land,Copy !req
311. there's a sort of strange
emptiness about it.Copy !req
312. A feeling of being so alone.Copy !req
313. Yeah, but you're not alone.Copy !req
314. I'm here, aren't I?Copy !req
315. Yeah, but...Copy !req
316. I think I know how you
must have felt...Copy !req
317. Or how I'd feel if I
were out here alone.Copy !req
318. You... Out here alone?Copy !req
319. That's a joke.Copy !req
320. A city girl like you...Copy !req
321. You wouldn't last
five minutes, love.Copy !req
322. This is man's country out here.Copy !req
323. That's right. I'm only a sheila.Copy !req
324. We're heading for that
escarpment today, right?Copy !req
325. Yeah.Copy !req
326. Okay.Copy !req
327. See you there this afternoon.Copy !req
328. Hey!Copy !req
329. If you're gonna go,
take the gun with you.Copy !req
330. If you get into trouble, fire
a couple of shots in the air.Copy !req
331. That's the dangerous end.Copy !req
332. So it is.Copy !req
333. Hmm.Copy !req
334. It's all right. It's over.Copy !req
335. Hey. Hey.Copy !req
336. I got you. I got you.Copy !req
337. Is it dead?Copy !req
338. Well, if it isn't, I'm gonna
have a hell of a jobCopy !req
339. skinning the bastard.Copy !req
340. Well, you were right.Copy !req
341. Definitely no place
for a city girl.Copy !req
342. Ah, I don't know.Copy !req
343. From what Wal's told me, living in
the city can be just as dangerous.Copy !req
344. Haven't you ever lived in a city?Copy !req
345. Never been to a city.Copy !req
346. - You're kidding.
- No.Copy !req
347. Cities are crowded, right?Copy !req
348. If I went and lived in some
city, I'd only make it worse.Copy !req
349. Here. Try this.Copy !req
350. Do you want me to
have a look at that?Copy !req
351. It's just a scratch.Copy !req
352. Yeah, well, a scratch can
turn septic out here.Copy !req
353. Give us a look. It's all right.Copy !req
354. Shh.Copy !req
355. Now what?Copy !req
356. Oh, Christ. It's like
living with Davy Crockett.Copy !req
357. Mick?Copy !req
358. Mick.Copy !req
359. Ah, Mick.Copy !req
360. You frightened shit out of me.Copy !req
361. So I ought to, mate.
Sneaking up on a manCopy !req
362. when he's rendering
first-aid to a lady.Copy !req
363. Ah. Is that what you were doing?Copy !req
364. It's all right.
It's a mate of mine.Copy !req
365. Neville Bell. Sue Charlton.Copy !req
366. G'day, Sue.Copy !req
367. What are you doing wandering
around here in the scrub, Nev?Copy !req
368. I'm on my way to a corroboree
over at the Jabba.Copy !req
369. It's a bloody drag,Copy !req
370. but still my dad get angry
if I don't show up.Copy !req
371. See, Nev's a real city boy,
but his dad's a tribal elder.Copy !req
372. Oh, no. You can't
take my photograph.Copy !req
373. Oh. I'm sorry. You believe it
will take your spirit away.Copy !req
374. No. You got lens cap on.Copy !req
375. Crikey, Mick. I better get going.Copy !req
376. - Nice to meet you, Sue.
- Bye, Nev.Copy !req
377. I'll catch up with you, Nev.Copy !req
378. What's happening?Copy !req
379. I better go with Nev and have
a chat with the Pintinjarra.Copy !req
380. Oh, can I come?Copy !req
381. No way.Copy !req
382. Women are strictly taboo
at these turnouts.Copy !req
383. How does he find his
way in the dark?Copy !req
384. He thinks his way.Copy !req
385. A lot of people believe
that they're telepathic.Copy !req
386. Ooh!Copy !req
387. Oh, I hate the bush.Copy !req
388. How did you know?Copy !req
389. Are you telepathic?Copy !req
390. Nah. Common sense.Copy !req
391. You're a woman. You're a reporter.Copy !req
392. That makes you the biggest
busybody in the world.Copy !req
393. I can live with that.Copy !req
394. That croc was gonna eat me alive.Copy !req
395. Oh, I wouldn't hold
that against him.Copy !req
396. Same thought crossed
my mind once or twice.Copy !req
397. Good night, Mick.Copy !req
398. Hmm.Copy !req
399. Of course, it took me a
week to crawl this far.Copy !req
400. I thought I was a goner.Copy !req
401. Said to meself, "Mick, old son",Copy !req
402. "find yourself a nice,
comfortable spot"Copy !req
403. "and lay down and die."Copy !req
404. Weren't you afraid?Copy !req
405. Of dying? Nah.Copy !req
406. I read the Bible once.Copy !req
407. You know God and Jesus
and all them apostles?Copy !req
408. They were all fishermen,
just like me.Copy !req
409. Yep. Straight to heaven
for Mick Dundee.Copy !req
410. Yep.Copy !req
411. Me and God...Copy !req
412. We'd be mates.Copy !req
413. This is Echo Lake.Copy !req
414. I reckon this place saved me life.Copy !req
415. That's mineral water.Copy !req
416. Means no crocs.Copy !req
417. More tucker here than you
could poke a stick at.Copy !req
418. Tucker?Copy !req
419. Food. You hungry?Copy !req
420. - Starving.
- I'll get lunch.Copy !req
421. How do you like your goanna?
Medium? Well done?Copy !req
422. You don't really
expect me to eat that?Copy !req
423. Yeah, it's great. Here,
try some of those yams.Copy !req
424. Try the grubs and the sugar ants.Copy !req
425. Just bite the end off.
They're really sweet.Copy !req
426. Black fellas love them.Copy !req
427. What about you?
Aren't you having any?Copy !req
428. Me?Copy !req
429. Ah, Well...Copy !req
430. You can live on it...Copy !req
431. But it tastes like shit.Copy !req
432. Mick.Copy !req
433. When I go back, why
don't you come with me?Copy !req
434. What for?Copy !req
435. Well, it would make a great
wrap to the story...Copy !req
436. You in New York City.Copy !req
437. Oh.Copy !req
438. For a minute there I thought
you were making a pass at me.Copy !req
439. Well, I might have been.Copy !req
440. Would you mind?Copy !req
441. Bloody Wally.Copy !req
442. He's only been here a dozen times.Copy !req
443. He's probably lost.Copy !req
444. Did you, uh...Copy !req
445. You got wind or something, Wal?Copy !req
446. I want Mick to come back
to New York with me.Copy !req
447. Mick? In a big city?Copy !req
448. No chance.Copy !req
449. Paper would pay.Copy !req
450. Well, a man should
broaden his horizons.Copy !req
451. Everything Okay?Copy !req
452. Oh, yeah. No worries.Copy !req
453. Jesus Christ!Copy !req
454. Sue!Copy !req
455. Sue!Copy !req
456. Sue.Copy !req
457. G'day, mate!Copy !req
458. You look absolutely stunning.Copy !req
459. - Welcome home.
- Thanks.Copy !req
460. Here, let me get this.Copy !req
461. Oh...Copy !req
462. Where's the man from the backwoods?Copy !req
463. Oh, God. We got
separated in customs.Copy !req
464. He almost started a riotCopy !req
465. when they wanted to look
through his suitcase.Copy !req
466. Ah, there he is.Copy !req
467. So, that's Jungle Jim.Copy !req
468. New York City, Mr. Dundee.Copy !req
469. Home to seven million people.Copy !req
470. That's incredible.Copy !req
471. Imagine seven million people
all wanting to live together.Copy !req
472. Yep. New York must be the
friendliest place on earth.Copy !req
473. G'day!Copy !req
474. Mick Dundee from
Australia. How are you?Copy !req
475. I'm fine. How are you? I think...Copy !req
476. Good. Just came down
for a couple of days.Copy !req
477. Probably see you around.Copy !req
478. Fine. We went from there...Copy !req
479. I don't know, I think...Copy !req
480. Thank you, Gus.Copy !req
481. - You'll take care of the luggage?
- Yes, sir.Copy !req
482. That's it.Copy !req
483. Hey. Thanks for the lift, mate.Copy !req
484. No problem.Copy !req
485. What tribe are you, Gus?Copy !req
486. Tribe?Copy !req
487. Man, I ain't from no tribe.Copy !req
488. You're a black feller, aren't you?Copy !req
489. Last time I looked.Copy !req
490. No one in our tribe's got
a flash car like this.Copy !req
491. You must be doing all right, eh?Copy !req
492. I'll get a cab back to the office.Copy !req
493. Do you want to eat
somewhere special tonight?Copy !req
494. Well, I thought
Tucano's would be nice.Copy !req
495. Tucano's. 7:30?Copy !req
496. Mmm. Great.Copy !req
497. - Bye.
- Okay.Copy !req
498. Table for three.Copy !req
499. Sir?Copy !req
500. No worries.Copy !req
501. Well, what do you think?Copy !req
502. Oh, it's a bit rough,
but I'll manage.Copy !req
503. Hey, how many of us
are staying here?Copy !req
504. Just you.Copy !req
505. I've got my own apartment downtown.Copy !req
506. Oh, sorry, Mick Dundee.
I didn't catch the name.Copy !req
507. - Angelo.
- Pleased to meet you, Angelo.Copy !req
508. I got it. Here you go.Copy !req
509. Got to pay for the room
in advance, have we?Copy !req
510. You're in m town now, trust me.Copy !req
511. Yeah. Can I get the direct
dialing code for Australia?Copy !req
512. You should be comfortable.
Everything's here.Copy !req
513. There's a TV if you get bored.Copy !req
514. Ah, television.Copy !req
515. Yeah, I saw that at Darkie
Johnson's place years ago.Copy !req
516. Yep, that's what I saw.Copy !req
517. Right. Okay, thanks.Copy !req
518. So, I'm writing down Wally's
number and my office number.Copy !req
519. Hey, Sue, come here, look at this!Copy !req
520. Some nitwit's put two
dunnies in here.Copy !req
521. One dunny, one bidet.Copy !req
522. - Bidet?
- Mmm.Copy !req
523. It's for... After you... You know.Copy !req
524. You figure it out.Copy !req
525. See you at seven.Copy !req
526. Yeah.Copy !req
527. For washing your backside, right?Copy !req
528. G'day.Copy !req
529. G'day.Copy !req
530. G'day.Copy !req
531. - Hello.
- G'day.Copy !req
532. G'day.Copy !req
533. Sorry.Copy !req
534. G'day. Ooops!Copy !req
535. Shit.Copy !req
536. - Take it easy, Mick.
- Thanks, mate.Copy !req
537. - Ta.
- Bye.Copy !req
538. - G'day.
- Yes, sir.Copy !req
539. Good evening. Follow me, please.Copy !req
540. - Hello.
- Um.Copy !req
541. Sorry we're late.Copy !req
542. - Been waiting long?
- Oh, I arrived early,Copy !req
543. eager to spend time with my girl.Copy !req
544. So, what are we drinking?
Uh, two vodka martinis,Copy !req
545. and what's yours, crocodile?Copy !req
546. Yeah, I'll have two of
those, and a beer, thanks.Copy !req
547. Could you send them through
to our table, Matt?Copy !req
548. You have been here awhile.Copy !req
549. Let's eat.Copy !req
550. Now this will be quite a
novelty for you, Mick.Copy !req
551. Eating something without
having to kill it first.Copy !req
552. Shall we?Copy !req
553. - Ah, Roberto.
- Good evening, Mr. Mason.Copy !req
554. I can see you got some
friends. Follow me, please.Copy !req
555. Thank you.Copy !req
556. You know I had almost forgotten
what a sexy-looking lady you are.Copy !req
557. I'll gonna have to find a
way of keeping you in town.Copy !req
558. Oh, I think we can
work something out.Copy !req
559. Really? Yes, what?Copy !req
560. Listen, uh, you two
should really be alone.Copy !req
561. Sorry, Mick. It's just that we haven't
seen each other in six weeks.Copy !req
562. Well, that's all the more reason...Copy !req
563. Oh, there's no way I'd leave you alone
on your first night in New York.Copy !req
564. Richard and I want you with us.Copy !req
565. Right. Absolutely.Copy !req
566. Ah, New York is no place
for a country gent.Copy !req
567. I mean, ain't no crocodiles out
there, but a fast-moving ChevyCopy !req
568. sure make a mess of you.Copy !req
569. What's your game?Copy !req
570. Great. I'm starving.Copy !req
571. Ha ha! Grazie, Roberto.Copy !req
572. Thank you. Um, perhaps I should
order for all of us, right?Copy !req
573. I mean, I don't imagine
that they have any...Copy !req
574. Kangaroo steak or possum grits!Copy !req
575. Oh, don't worry about Mick.Copy !req
576. He can make a gourmet meal
out of just about anything.Copy !req
577. Even medium-rare goanna.Copy !req
578. It was great, wasn't it, eh?
And what about the yams?Copy !req
579. Oh, yes. They were great.Copy !req
580. Well, that's...Copy !req
581. That's wonderful.Copy !req
582. As he's our guest,Copy !req
583. perhaps he'd like to
order for all of us.Copy !req
584. Oh, wait a minute. I'll do that.Copy !req
585. No, it's... It's all right.Copy !req
586. I'll have a lash.Copy !req
587. - Italian, eh?
- Yes.Copy !req
588. I don't know what you call it,
but I'd like to look at that dishCopy !req
589. out there the big fat
sheila's eating.Copy !req
590. Richard!Copy !req
591. He okay?Copy !req
592. Can't handle his drink, poor fella.Copy !req
593. He said you hit him.Copy !req
594. You're not in the pub
at Walkabout Creek now.Copy !req
595. - He was being a pain.
- That's beside the point.Copy !req
596. You're not serious about
this lemon, are you?Copy !req
597. Butt out, Dundee!Copy !req
598. He had a little too much to drink.Copy !req
599. Richard is warm, caring,
and I love him, okay?Copy !req
600. - Excuse me.
- What?Copy !req
601. I think I'm going to throw up.Copy !req
602. God.Copy !req
603. - You want a hand?
- No. I can handle it.Copy !req
604. I'm fine.Copy !req
605. Listen, we've got a busy day
tomorrow, so get some sleep.Copy !req
606. I'll pick you up early.Copy !req
607. - Good night.
- Good night.Copy !req
608. - I think you better take me to the boozer.
- Boozer?Copy !req
609. Don't know that one.Copy !req
610. Pub. You know, somewhere
to get a drink.Copy !req
611. - Want to join me?
- I just finished my shift. Why not?Copy !req
612. - Fancy a drink, do you?
- You kidding? I'm Italian.Copy !req
613. I'd drink you under the
table any day, my friend.Copy !req
614. Well, that could be interesting.Copy !req
615. No, I'm not putting down
your black widow spider,Copy !req
616. but the funnel-web spider can
kill a man in eight seconds,Copy !req
617. just by looking at him.Copy !req
618. Of course, the real danger down
there is the sharks, though,Copy !req
619. the big ones, you know, like Jaws?Copy !req
620. I caught one down there
about three weeks ago.Copy !req
621. Got it opened. Know what
we found inside it?Copy !req
622. Three Filipino fishermen...Copy !req
623. - Still in their boat.
- Hey, buzzy!Copy !req
624. Come on over, meet this
guy from Australia.Copy !req
625. Hey, my man, what's happening?Copy !req
626. Uh, where?Copy !req
627. What's goin' down, bro?Copy !req
628. Goin' down? Ah, yeah. Just
blowing the froth off a couple.Copy !req
629. All right! Hang loose, my man.Copy !req
630. - Flat out like a lizard drinking.
- Say what?Copy !req
631. What?Copy !req
632. He's cool.Copy !req
633. Yeah. I'm cool. I'm cool.Copy !req
634. All right!Copy !req
635. All right!Copy !req
636. He's a nice fellow.Copy !req
637. Here's my little
Italian mate, Danny.Copy !req
638. Just in time to buy
another round, too, mate.Copy !req
639. What are you drinking, Gwendoline?Copy !req
640. Ah, no more for me. Thanks, Mick.
I must be getting on home.Copy !req
641. Oh.Copy !req
642. Where's, uh...
Where's home, sweetie?Copy !req
643. Just around the corner.Copy !req
644. I have a little place where
I live all by my lonesome.Copy !req
645. Not now.Copy !req
646. - Most of the time, that is.
- Oh.Copy !req
647. Must, uh...Copy !req
648. Must get a bit lonely, eh?Copy !req
649. Hanker for a bit of,
uh, male company?Copy !req
650. Do I ever.Copy !req
651. Hey, come here.Copy !req
652. Uh, excuse me, Gwendoline.Copy !req
653. Don't go away, love.Copy !req
654. I have been trying to
tell you all night.Copy !req
655. That girl, she's a guy.Copy !req
656. Huh?Copy !req
657. A man dressed up as a girl.Copy !req
658. Nah.Copy !req
659. A fag, for Christ's sakes!Copy !req
660. I swear.Copy !req
661. Oh!Copy !req
662. Hey... That was a guy.Copy !req
663. A guy dressed up like
a sheila. Look at that.Copy !req
664. Hey, you all knew,
you pack of bastards.Copy !req
665. Hey! Ah!Copy !req
666. Where the hell did I leave the cab?Copy !req
667. Don't know.Copy !req
668. You wait here until I
go look for it, mate.Copy !req
669. Righto, mate.Copy !req
670. G'day, girls.Copy !req
671. Mick Dundee from Australia.Copy !req
672. Looking for a good time, honey?Copy !req
673. Always looking for a good time.Copy !req
674. Are either of you ladies attached
or married or anything like that?Copy !req
675. No. We're both single ladies.Copy !req
676. This is Karla. I'm Simone.
Where you from, honey?Copy !req
677. I'm from Walkabout Creek
in the Northern Territory.Copy !req
678. You probably don't
know where that is.Copy !req
679. Hey. I do.Copy !req
680. You're the guy I've been
reading about in the paper,Copy !req
681. the "Crocodile Man."Copy !req
682. I've been reading about
him in the paper.Copy !req
683. He's like a regular Tarzan.Copy !req
684. Wrestles crocodiles, eats snakes.Copy !req
685. Is this your first
trip to New York?Copy !req
686. First trip anywhere.Copy !req
687. Well, hell.Copy !req
688. We might just have to
give you one for free.Copy !req
689. Yeah.Copy !req
690. One what?Copy !req
691. Huh.Copy !req
692. Ah, maybe we could take in a movie
or, you know, go to a dance or...Copy !req
693. Hey, girls, girls.Copy !req
694. Are we working tonight
or are we socializing?Copy !req
695. Hey, pal.Copy !req
696. I was just talking to the ladies
and making a bit of progress.Copy !req
697. Are you going to talk all night, my
man, or you going to screw one of them?Copy !req
698. Listen, I'm sorry about that,Copy !req
699. but if you stand around out the
front of a place like this,Copy !req
700. you're going to hear that
kind of bad language.Copy !req
701. I should've been home hours ago.Copy !req
702. Nice chatting to you, ladies.Copy !req
703. Hey, come on, Dan. You're
in no condition to drive.Copy !req
704. Hop in, mate.Copy !req
705. That's why you have so many
accidents over here...Copy !req
706. The steering wheel's on the
wrong side of the car.Copy !req
707. Get out of the way, dopey!Copy !req
708. Get on the right side of
the road, you pelican!Copy !req
709. If I give my heart to youCopy !req
710. Then I'll have none
and you'll have twoCopy !req
711. Señor Mick?Copy !req
712. Ah.Copy !req
713. The towels for Señor Mick.Copy !req
714. Is that you, Rosita?Copy !req
715. Just leave the spare towels
on the bed, will you?Copy !req
716. Muchas gracias, love.Copy !req
717. Si, Señor Mick.Copy !req
718. Struth!Copy !req
719. Um... Hey, listen, uh...Copy !req
720. Rosita, uh...Copy !req
721. I was only being friendly.Copy !req
722. You know, I didn't mean, um...Copy !req
723. Your towels, Señor Mick.Copy !req
724. Oh. Phew.Copy !req
725. For a minute there, um...Copy !req
726. Room service took on
a whole new meaning.Copy !req
727. One dog, please.Copy !req
728. With chili, onions,
sauerkraut, and some peppers.Copy !req
729. There you go.Copy !req
730. You eat that?Copy !req
731. Well, you know, you can live on
it, but it tastes like shit.Copy !req
732. My bag!Copy !req
733. Somebody stop him!Copy !req
734. Thief! Thief!Copy !req
735. Hey, Mick!Copy !req
736. How you doing, baby?
It's me, Simone!Copy !req
737. Oh, yeah, Simone.Copy !req
738. Having a good time?Copy !req
739. As always.Copy !req
740. Nice girl.Copy !req
741. Thoughtful, too...Copy !req
742. - Dancing with her father.
- Hmm.Copy !req
743. You'll have to overcome thisCopy !req
744. - country boy shyness, Dundee.
- Hi.Copy !req
745. Yeah.Copy !req
746. Oh, there's someone
I want you to meet.Copy !req
747. Ah! Sue, darling! You're back.Copy !req
748. How wonderful.Copy !req
749. Fran, how are you?Copy !req
750. Couldn't be better.Copy !req
751. Tell me, who's the new man?Copy !req
752. This is the man I'm writing
about, Mick Dundee.Copy !req
753. Oh!Copy !req
754. Something the matter, darling?Copy !req
755. Oh!Copy !req
756. Hi. Pleased to meet you.Copy !req
757. It's okay. He's Australian.Copy !req
758. Maybe I'd better go there someday.Copy !req
759. Oh, darling, I'm so
glad you could come.Copy !req
760. Excuse me.Copy !req
761. Ah. Just making sure.Copy !req
762. Right.Copy !req
763. I'll get us a drink.Copy !req
764. It's good shit.Copy !req
765. What's up, pal? Got a
blocked nose, have you?Copy !req
766. Blocked nose. Right.Copy !req
767. There's a better way
of doing it than that.Copy !req
768. Better way, huh?Copy !req
769. Yep.Copy !req
770. It's the way we do it back home.Copy !req
771. It really fixes us up.Copy !req
772. Now, boil the water,Copy !req
773. get the steam going. Right.Copy !req
774. Put your face right over that.Copy !req
775. And the old tea towel
over your scalp.Copy !req
776. Put your head right down onto that.Copy !req
777. Breathe it in real deep.Copy !req
778. Ten minutes of that, you'll be
clear as a bell. No worries.Copy !req
779. Get into it.Copy !req
780. That will do it.Copy !req
781. You know, Mick, that was probablyCopy !req
782. a couple hundred dollars'
worth of cocaine.Copy !req
783. What's that?Copy !req
784. Oh. It's a drug. You sniff it.Copy !req
785. What for?Copy !req
786. Well, to get a buzz.Copy !req
787. What, like shoving a
blowfly up your nose?Copy !req
788. Got the photo, Mick.Copy !req
789. I look great.Copy !req
790. Yeah.Copy !req
791. Ida sends love.Copy !req
792. Wait a minute. Donk wants
to have a word to you.Copy !req
793. Mick! Get stuffed!Copy !req
794. Very good.Copy !req
795. How you getting on with
the New Yorkers, Mick?Copy !req
796. Oh, bonzer people.Copy !req
797. Friendly, full of beans,
but, uh, a bit weird.Copy !req
798. Well, that's the joys of traveling.Copy !req
799. Uh. When are you coming home, mate?Copy !req
800. Well, if you can manage,
Wal, I'd like to stay a while.Copy !req
801. Oh, yeah. No troubles at all.Copy !req
802. Wouldn't have anything to do with
a certain lady writer, would it?Copy !req
803. Yeah, well,Copy !req
804. to start with, she's a
better kisser than Donk.Copy !req
805. You little beauty.Copy !req
806. Keep in touch.Copy !req
807. Yeah. No worries, Wal. Ta-ta.Copy !req
808. Come on, Wal, what'd he say?Copy !req
809. Well, he wants to stay there
a little while longer.Copy !req
810. He wants me to take
care of things here.Copy !req
811. You got a light, buddy?Copy !req
812. Yeah. Sure, kid. There you go.Copy !req
813. And your wallet.Copy !req
814. Mick, give him your wallet.Copy !req
815. - What for?
- He's got a knife.Copy !req
816. That's not a knife.Copy !req
817. That's a knife.Copy !req
818. Shit!Copy !req
819. Just kids having fun.
Are you all right?Copy !req
820. I'm always all right when
I'm with you, Dundee.Copy !req
821. God, that sounds corny.Copy !req
822. Why do you always make me feel
like Jane in a Tarzan comic?Copy !req
823. That's what we ran while
you were down under.Copy !req
824. Sorry. Can't seem to
get my mind in gear.Copy !req
825. Sue, when you were away,Copy !req
826. I, uh... I did some thinking.Copy !req
827. It's time I made
some concrete plans.Copy !req
828. Are you building a freewayCopy !req
829. or proposing to the finest
catch in New York state?Copy !req
830. Hello, young lady. Been
reading your articles.Copy !req
831. It seems you've been
tripping all over the world,Copy !req
832. enjoying yourself at our expense.Copy !req
833. Well, I'd like to think you're
getting your money's worth.Copy !req
834. Hi, Dad.Copy !req
835. You got a kiss for the old man?Copy !req
836. Thank God you're home safe.Copy !req
837. Have you told Sue about Sunday?Copy !req
838. Oh, I was just about to.Copy !req
839. You're coming out to the weekend
house for a welcome home dinner.Copy !req
840. But, right now, I want
Richard to explainCopy !req
841. how he runs this newspaper
better than I doCopy !req
842. when I'm away.Copy !req
843. By all means, bring along
this, uh, Crocodile Dundee.Copy !req
844. Him, I've got to meet.Copy !req
845. I thought you said your
dad sells newspapers.Copy !req
846. Oh, well...Copy !req
847. He sells a lot of newspapers.Copy !req
848. Thank you, Gus.Copy !req
849. Oh, hell. The dogs are out.Copy !req
850. Mick.Copy !req
851. Nice to see you again,
Miss. Mr. Mason.Copy !req
852. Good to see you looking
so fit and well.Copy !req
853. Simpson, Mr. Dundee.Copy !req
854. Nice to meet you, Simo.Copy !req
855. Call me Mick.Copy !req
856. Mick.Copy !req
857. Ahem. Your father's
expecting you, Miss.Copy !req
858. He's waiting with his
guests in the lounge.Copy !req
859. Oh, excuse me.Copy !req
860. - Hi, pumpkin.
- Hi, Dad.Copy !req
861. - Richard.
- Good to see you.Copy !req
862. And this of course is Mr. Dundee.Copy !req
863. Yep.Copy !req
864. I believe I'm deeply in your debt
for saving my daughter's life.Copy !req
865. Well, um... Buy me a cold beer,
and we'll call it quits.Copy !req
866. Nice joint you got here.Copy !req
867. Well, it keeps the
rain off our heads.Copy !req
868. Come. I want you to
meet some people.Copy !req
869. Patricia, a drink for Mr. Dundee.Copy !req
870. Oh, my God, look who's here.Copy !req
871. - My Dawn.
- How are you?Copy !req
872. Dorothy and Wendell
Wainwright. From Australia.Copy !req
873. - Oh.
- Nice to meet you, Wendell.Copy !req
874. Mick. Have a drink.Copy !req
875. Thank you.Copy !req
876. Are you involved in
cattle, Mr. Dundee?Copy !req
877. Yeah. Mostly buffaloes.Copy !req
878. - Oh.
- Do you breed them?Copy !req
879. No, I just toss them.Copy !req
880. And how are you finding New York?Copy !req
881. - Bit of a lunatic asylum, eh?
- Oh.Copy !req
882. That's why I love it,
'cause I fit right in.Copy !req
883. if you'll excuse me, I'd like Mick
to say hello to Senator Manly.Copy !req
884. That's a good idea.Copy !req
885. - It was nice meeting you.
- See you later.Copy !req
886. Seems like a personable fellow.Copy !req
887. What a strange gentleman.Copy !req
888. Nice people.Copy !req
889. Dorothy's fine now, but she
used to be really uptight.Copy !req
890. What happened?Copy !req
891. She found a wonderful shrink.Copy !req
892. Psychiatrist.Copy !req
893. I shouldn't have made that crack
about the lunatic asylum.Copy !req
894. Didn't know she was nuts.Copy !req
895. Of course, she's not nuts.Copy !req
896. People go to a psychiatrist
to talk about their problems.Copy !req
897. She just needed to unload them.Copy !req
898. You know, bring them
out in the open.Copy !req
899. Hasn't she got any mates?Copy !req
900. You're right. Guess we
could all use more mates.Copy !req
901. I suppose you don't have any
shrinks at Walkabout Creek?Copy !req
902. No. Back there, if you got
a problem, you tell Wally.Copy !req
903. And he tells everyone in town,Copy !req
904. brings it out in the
open, no more problem.Copy !req
905. Richard! You could
make it this evening.Copy !req
906. Wendell, good to see you.Copy !req
907. And I don't believe I
know your daughter.Copy !req
908. - Oh, stop it!
- Oh, Richard!Copy !req
909. Ladies and gentlemen.Copy !req
910. Friends. Welcome home, Sue.Copy !req
911. As... As you can see, we're
all glad to have you back.Copy !req
912. Of course, no one more than I.Copy !req
913. I guess everyone in this roomCopy !req
914. knows how this beautiful lady
and I I feel about each other.Copy !req
915. Sue's come back to us,Copy !req
916. delivered, literally, out
of the jaws of deathCopy !req
917. by our new-found friend,
Mr. Michael J. Dundee.Copy !req
918. A man... A man to whom
I am doubly indebted.Copy !req
919. Of course, not only did he bring
back to me the woman that I love,Copy !req
920. but he managed to
increase the circulationCopy !req
921. of the newspaper in the process.Copy !req
922. You know, uh...
Sam said to me earlier,Copy !req
923. "You're her editor."Copy !req
924. "Can't you stop her from taking
all these dangerous assignments?"Copy !req
925. Well, quite obviously, I have
not had a great deal of successCopy !req
926. influencing her as her editor.Copy !req
927. Perhaps I'll have more
success as her husband.Copy !req
928. - If she'll have me.
- Oh, Richard.Copy !req
929. Congratulations.Copy !req
930. It's a pleasure having
you here to share this.Copy !req
931. Well done. Well done.Copy !req
932. Thank you very much. I couldn't
have done it without your help.Copy !req
933. Sweetheart?Copy !req
934. I'll get in the back, Gus.Copy !req
935. To the hotel, Mick?Copy !req
936. Yeah, Gus, by way
of a liquor store.Copy !req
937. For medicinal purposes.Copy !req
938. Thanks, mate.Copy !req
939. Hey, you take care, now.Copy !req
940. Hey, buddy.Copy !req
941. Get it into you, pop.Copy !req
942. God bless you. You
saved my life, really.Copy !req
943. Hey, Simone.Copy !req
944. You want some action?Copy !req
945. Uh, I thought you
were somebody else.Copy !req
946. Well, if it ain't the
man who don't likeCopy !req
947. bad fucking language
in front of ladies.Copy !req
948. What's the matter, Aussie boy?Copy !req
949. You going to make like a
kangaroo and hop away?Copy !req
950. Time for a little tap dance.Copy !req
951. You okay, Mick?Copy !req
952. Oh, yeah, Gus. No worries.Copy !req
953. I was just getting on top of them.Copy !req
954. You sure you're not
Pintinjarra tribe?Copy !req
955. No, man. Harlem Warlords.Copy !req
956. I knew you were tribal.Copy !req
957. Mick Dundee's room, please.Copy !req
958. I'm sorry. He's still
not answering.Copy !req
959. Uh, he called down this morning
to say he was checking out today.Copy !req
960. We're going to miss
him around here.Copy !req
961. Thanks.Copy !req
962. Thank you, sir.Copy !req
963. G'day, Irving. How are you, mate?Copy !req
964. Oh, yeah. I wouldn't
be dead for dollars.Copy !req
965. Close.Copy !req
966. Are you leaving us, Mick?
You going back home?Copy !req
967. Ah, no. I thought I'd go Walkabout.Copy !req
968. Huh?Copy !req
969. Wander around,
take a look at America.Copy !req
970. For how long?Copy !req
971. Long as it takes.Copy !req
972. What's the quickest
way out of town?Copy !req
973. Well, if you're looking
for adventure,Copy !req
974. there's a subway two
blocks that way.Copy !req
975. It'll take you to Grand
Central Station.Copy !req
976. That'll do. Uh...Copy !req
977. Have a nice day, Oiving.Copy !req
978. Uh, no worries, mate.Copy !req
979. - Morning, Miss.
- Morning.Copy !req
980. Are you sure you know
what you're doing?Copy !req
981. No, but it will come to me.Copy !req
982. Incidentally, Miss, if you're
looking for Crocodile Mick,Copy !req
983. he's gone walkabout.Copy !req
984. I don't suppose you know where?Copy !req
985. Yeah. He's headed for the
subway two blocks down.Copy !req
986. You'd better hurry.Copy !req
987. Mind this for me.Copy !req
988. Oh, Christ.Copy !req
989. Hey, lady, where you going?Copy !req
990. If you want to play, why
don't you play with me?Copy !req
991. Mick!Copy !req
992. Mick Dundee!Copy !req
993. - Ooowweee!
- What's up, lady?Copy !req
994. I got to talk to that
man down the end.Copy !req
995. The one in the black hat.Copy !req
996. Hey!Copy !req
997. Lady here wants to talk to
the guy in the black hat!Copy !req
998. Hey, fella!Copy !req
999. You in the hat!Copy !req
1000. The lady down the end
wants to see you!Copy !req
1001. What does she want?Copy !req
1002. What does she want?Copy !req
1003. What do you want?Copy !req
1004. Tell him not to leave.Copy !req
1005. I'm not going to marry Richard.Copy !req
1006. Tell him don't leave. She's
not going to marry Richard.Copy !req
1007. Don't leave. I'm not
going to marry Richard.Copy !req
1008. Why not?Copy !req
1009. I don't know.Copy !req
1010. Why not?Copy !req
1011. Why not?Copy !req
1012. Tell him I love him.Copy !req
1013. I love you!Copy !req
1014. I love ya!Copy !req
1015. I love ya! I love ya!Copy !req
1016. She loves me.Copy !req
1017. Well?Copy !req
1018. Um, tell her I...Copy !req
1019. I'll tell her meself.
I'm coming through.Copy !req
1020. He's coming through!Copy !req
1021. He's coming through!Copy !req
1022. It's too crowded. We're
jammed in like sheep.Copy !req
1023. Up, up, up.Copy !req
1024. Coming through!Copy !req