1. I forgot the opening line.Copy !req
2. Enough of that, Hobbs.Copy !req
3. Flight of birds,
the flight of man...Copy !req
4. Man's similarity to birds,
birds' similarity to man.Copy !req
5. These are the subjects at hand.Copy !req
6. And we will deal with them
for the next hour or soCopy !req
7. and hope that
we draw no conclusions,Copy !req
8. elsewise, the subject
shall cease to fascinate us.Copy !req
9. And alas, another dream
would be lost.Copy !req
10. There are too few.Copy !req
11. In these words,
the German poet Goethe...Copy !req
12. expressed man's
desire to fly.Copy !req
13. "How I yearn to throw
myself into endless spaceCopy !req
14. and float above
the awful abyss."Copy !req
15. Man, incontestably
the most advanced creature,Copy !req
16. has only to observe
the flight of birdsCopy !req
17. to realize the weight
of the earth's imprisonment.Copy !req
18. And so, the desire to fly
has been ever-presentCopy !req
19. in the mind of man.Copy !req
20. But the reality
has been long in coming.Copy !req
21. Has man truly
realized his dream?Copy !req
22. To answer that,
we must isolate the dream.Copy !req
23. Was the dream
to attain the ability to fly?Copy !req
24. Or was the dream
the freedom that true flightCopy !req
25. seemed to offer man?Copy !req
26. We may also touch on
the mortal damage man is doingCopy !req
27. to birds' environment
in comparisonCopy !req
28. to the piddling nuisance
birds cause man.Copy !req
29. It may someday be necessaryCopy !req
30. to build enormous
environmental enclosuresCopy !req
31. to protect both man and birds.Copy !req
32. But if so, it is questionableCopy !req
33. whether man will allow birds inCopy !req
34. or out, as the case may be.Copy !req
35. What key?Copy !req
36. Stop! Stop! Stop!Copy !req
37. Stop, you!
Stop! Stop! Stop!Copy !req
38. You're in the wrong key!Copy !req
39. The wrong key!Copy !req
40. And I want that
scoreboard lighted!Copy !req
41. I want that scoreboard
lighted every time we do it!Copy !req
42. And you! I want everything just
exactly the way it should be!Copy !req
43. That's why you're
in these uniforms!Copy !req
44. That's why I bought you
these uniforms!Copy !req
45. Now, let's start again
in the right key!Copy !req
46. All right! Again!Copy !req
47. Now, that was good!Copy !req
48. That was good!Copy !req
49. Now, once again!
I want once more!Copy !req
50. Social behavior.Copy !req
51. Shelderup Ebb first used
the word “dominance,"Copy !req
52. in describing his observations
on the social hierarchiesCopy !req
53. of birds.Copy !req
54. He concluded that within a flockCopy !req
55. composed of a single species,Copy !req
56. there exists a definite
order of social distinctions.Copy !req
57. And that between any two birds,Copy !req
58. one invariably has
precedence over the other.Copy !req
59. All right, it's gonna...Copy !req
60. Sir?
High today 95 degrees,Copy !req
61. partly cloudy,
light air pollution.Copy !req
62. Sir?Copy !req
63. Got a great hit!
Number one in town!Copy !req
64. Good morning, Mr. Wright.Copy !req
65. Good morning, Birdie.Copy !req
66. Get that away from me!Copy !req
67. I don't trust your big ears,
you dirty pinko.Copy !req
68. Here's your money, sir.Copy !req
69. - I don't have to count it, do I?
- Oh, no. No, sir.Copy !req
70. - It's all here, isn't it, Birdie?
- Oh, yes, sir.Copy !req
71. Every last bit.Copy !req
72. - Yes, sir.
- Yeah.Copy !req
73. What is that? Huh?Copy !req
74. Yeah! Look at that!Copy !req
75. Look at that!
Two big Georges right there!Copy !req
76. Who threw that tomato?Copy !req
77. The investigation
continues at this hourCopy !req
78. into the mysterious death of
well-known Houston socialiteCopy !req
79. Miss Daphne Heap,Copy !req
80. the soprano who sings the national
anthem...Copy !req
81. at the Astrodome
before every ball game.Copy !req
82. Put that window down, McCloud.Copy !req
83. McCloud, you don't listen to me.Copy !req
84. Now, there are two things
I want to tell you,Copy !req
85. not only about your driving
which is just deplorable,Copy !req
86. but also about your
deportment which is also...Copy !req
87. Here's an important
bulletin just handed me.Copy !req
88. The latest development in that trio
of mysterious murders in HoustonCopy !req
89. came today from the office
of Haskell Weeks,Copy !req
90. the longtime friend
of the city told KILT reportersCopy !req
91. that he's bringing in
a special investigatorCopy !req
92. from the San Francisco
Police Department.Copy !req
93. A man identified only as Frank Shaft.Copy !req
94. Well, kid, that's it.Copy !req
95. I'm closing
this place down, McCloud.Copy !req
96. The black part's a conspiracy,
they're moving in.Copy !req
97. Did you see that grenade?Copy !req
98. There were buckets of grenades
in the living room.Copy !req
99. That kamikaze...Copy !req
100. Get off the grass! McCloud!Copy !req
101. Get me off!
McCloud! Oh, McCloud!Copy !req
102. Get Spiro on the phone,Copy !req
103. that's what I'm
gonna do right now.Copy !req
104. Get me out of here.
Be careful now, McCloud.Copy !req
105. Easy! Easy!Copy !req
106. Easy, McCloud!Copy !req
107. Easy, now!Copy !req
108. Up! One by one!Copy !req
109. Oh, I just dropped
a steamer through the hoop.Copy !req
110. This is
Karl Williams, KILT news.Copy !req
111. Quarter past the hour now and
time for the Hudson & HarriganCopy !req
112. and the cure minute, sir.Copy !req
113. How about a rebel yell then...Copy !req
114. What may
prove to be an important clueCopy !req
115. was turned up by policeCopy !req
116. when it was discovered
Miss Heap's prize pigeonsCopy !req
117. were apparently
released by the killer.Copy !req
118. Miss Heap's deep affection
for the birdsCopy !req
119. was well known
throughout the southwest.Copy !req
120. Yes, everything
seems to be in good shape.Copy !req
121. I'm very pleasantly
surprised, Maybelline.Copy !req
122. Wait a minute. Just hold on.
Wait a minute.Copy !req
123. $24.32.Copy !req
124. Unpaid.Copy !req
125. Well, he died Tuesday,
Mr. Wright.Copy !req
126. - He did?
- Yes, sir.Copy !req
127. Well, I'm very sorry
to hear that, Maybelline.Copy !req
128. But if Mr. Saunders did die on Tuesday,
I can't do anything about that.Copy !req
129. He still owes me
for a week's rent.Copy !req
130. That money's gonna
have to come from someplace.Copy !req
131. What do you plan to do about it?Copy !req
132. Well, surely, not from me.Copy !req
133. Yes, from you!
What do you mean not from you?Copy !req
134. There's money right there
in your hands.Copy !req
135. - But this...
- I want my money!Copy !req
136. - Give me my money!
- This is my money!Copy !req
137. Look out!Copy !req
138. Where's my bird? No! No!Copy !req
139. Something's wrong.Copy !req
140. Take your bird.
Get out of here.Copy !req
141. It's an invasion!
A goddamn commie invasion!Copy !req
142. McCloud, put that window...Copy !req
143. Don't you ever do that
when I'm talking to you.Copy !req
144. What do you mean
putting that window up?Copy !req
145. Goddamn fag. You know
something, McCloud?Copy !req
146. You are nothing but a fag.
A goddamn faggot.Copy !req
147. 5,432...Copy !req
148. 5,433...Copy !req
149. 5,435...Copy !req
150. 5,439...Copy !req
151. Watch this.Copy !req
152. Hee, pup pup pup.Copy !req
153. Little old gumba,Copy !req
154. darling, come here.Copy !req
155. Didn't anybody ever tell you that
you had a beautiful "doreemus."Copy !req
156. Ow! Mr. Wright!Copy !req
157. You...Copy !req
158. Turn on the television set.Copy !req
159. The television set's not
working.Copy !req
160. McCloud, I wanna watch
my program.Copy !req
161. I gotta watch Sesame Street.
Now turn it on.Copy !req
162. Look! McCloud, on the hood!Copy !req
163. Bird doodoo! Bird doodoo!Copy !req
164. Stop the car, McCloud!
Stop the car!Copy !req
165. Get that thing off of there.Copy !req
166. Get it off!
Hurry up, McCloud!Copy !req
167. Hurry up!
Wipe it off!Copy !req
168. It'll run
right through the paint.Copy !req
169. Bird shit on the hood,
God damn it.Copy !req
170. I should never have
hired you this morning.Copy !req
171. Goddamn birds.Copy !req
172. McCloud, are you happy
in your work?Copy !req
173. Well, you must think I
have all the money in the world!Copy !req
174. You're fired!Copy !req
175. I don't give a damn!Copy !req
176. Don't tell me...
get away from me.Copy !req
177. - Get out of my way!
- Please!Copy !req
178. Get out of my way,
you silly bitch.Copy !req
179. I'll mow you down!Copy !req
180. You yap, yap, yap!Copy !req
181. You're so full of bullshit...Copy !req
182. How do you do, ladies?Copy !req
183. All right, McCloud,
let's move it.Copy !req
184. Easy down the chute, McCloud.Copy !req
185. Easy down.Copy !req
186. McCloud?Copy !req
187. McCloud! McCloud!Copy !req
188. Don't you ever
lay a hand on my money.Copy !req
189. Ah... my money...Copy !req
190. McCloud...Copy !req
191. KILT news learnedCopy !req
192. that Shaft is being
flown into HoustonCopy !req
193. entirely
at Haskell Weeks' expense.Copy !req
194. The legendary super-cop
from 'Frisco is due to arriveCopy !req
195. at Houston
Intercontinental AirportCopy !req
196. only minutes from now.Copy !req
197. And we'll have a reporter there
for on-the-scene coverage.Copy !req
198. Oh, do you have the number
of the local Audubon Society?Copy !req
199. Luke Mclntyre at
Houston's Intercontinental Airport.Copy !req
200. We are stationed in the
private and very exclusiveCopy !req
201. executive jet terminalCopy !req
202. where Haskell Weeks' personal
jet Silver Eagle Mark IVCopy !req
203. has arrived non-stop
from the west coastCopy !req
204. with one of California's most
famous detectives on board,Copy !req
205. San Francisco super-cop
Frank Shaft.Copy !req
206. And our sources tell us
Shaft is here to workCopy !req
207. on the recent rash of mysterious
strangulation murders.Copy !req
208. Ah.Copy !req
209. The crested peacock.Copy !req
210. On the peacock,Copy !req
211. it is just that nature appears
to have bestowed her treasuresCopy !req
212. with the greatest profusion.Copy !req
213. Its size, imposing manner,Copy !req
214. firm tread and noble figure,Copy !req
215. the rich crest upon its head,Copy !req
216. its matchless plumageCopy !req
217. appearing to combineCopy !req
218. everything that
can delight the eye.Copy !req
219. And contend to place it
in our high esteem.Copy !req
220. Here's Shaft now disembarking.Copy !req
221. He's a striking figure.Copy !req
222. Turtleneck sweater,
custom slacks,Copy !req
223. and I can tell you this.Copy !req
224. If keeping your cool
and being totally composedCopy !req
225. makes for a better detective,Copy !req
226. then this Shaft
is one whale of a cop.Copy !req
227. I hate to rush you, Lieutenant,Copy !req
228. but Captain CrandallCopy !req
229. is gonna get
really pissed off at me.Copy !req
230. I mean, I was supposed to take
you right over to his officeCopy !req
231. as soon as you came in.Copy !req
232. I don't know how it is
in San Francisco, sir,Copy !req
233. but here in Houston, Captain
Crandall is head of homicide.Copy !req
234. And he rules that department
with an iron fistCopy !req
235. and what he says
really goes, sir.Copy !req
236. I don't even think
he likes San Francisco, sir.Copy !req
237. Frank.Copy !req
238. Tell me about the
third one, Johnson.Copy !req
239. That woman who was strangled.Copy !req
240. - Frank?
- That's my name. Call me Frank, ok?Copy !req
241. Yes, sir.Copy !req
242. Do you mind if I use that phone
to call Captain Crandall?Copy !req
243. - Tell him where we...
- Tell me about that third one, Johnson.Copy !req
244. Ok.Copy !req
245. Her name was Daphne Heap, sir.Copy !req
246. And she was very well respected
and admired in town.Copy !req
247. Her father was
a great benefactor,Copy !req
248. gave us a couple hospitals.Copy !req
249. And a nice park.Copy !req
250. Well, she was quite
a character, sir.Copy !req
251. You know, she used to sing the
national anthem at all the ball games.Copy !req
252. You know the type, sir?Copy !req
253. Even had her
own orchestra and everything.Copy !req
254. The unmated Song Thrush.Copy !req
255. The importance of song to a birdCopy !req
256. can be partly judged
by the amount of timeCopy !req
257. the bird devotes to it.Copy !req
258. However,Copy !req
259. one can,
with almost equally good logic,Copy !req
260. assume that bird choralesCopy !req
261. were first used to release
the nervous tension...Copy !req
262. Get out, you nigger bird!Copy !req
263. It was a mess, sir.
You should've seen her.Copy !req
264. - Molested?
- Molested?Copy !req
265. Sexually.
Was she sexually assaulted?Copy !req
266. Oh, no.
But she sure was a mess, sir.Copy !req
267. Miss Heap was found strangledCopy !req
268. at the formal palatial
in River Oaks.Copy !req
269. She was sprawled among
the bird of paradise plantsCopy !req
270. dressed in a red, white
and blue acrylic knitCopy !req
271. with flattering wing collarCopy !req
272. and matching imitating
bird feather beltCopy !req
273. and those
spangling red rhinestone shoes.Copy !req
274. Good morning,
ladies and gentlemen.Copy !req
275. Welcome to the Astrodome,Copy !req
276. the eighth wonder of the world.Copy !req
277. My name is Suzanne FerrisCopy !req
278. and I'll be your tour guide for
the next 45 minutes to an hour.Copy !req
279. So please feel free to ask
questions at any time.Copy !req
280. And if you must leave, like to
go to the bathroom or something,Copy !req
281. please notify me.Copy !req
282. By the way,
where is the bathroom?Copy !req
283. Where is the bathroom?Copy !req
284. Well, there are bathrooms
every 50 feet.Copy !req
285. But they're not really
bathrooms, you know.Copy !req
286. They're... they don't have a tub
or anything like that.Copy !req
287. All right, our first stop will
be down in the Dome Skeller.Copy !req
288. It's 25 feet underground.Copy !req
289. And it's about the only
place you can goCopy !req
290. that far underground
in Texas and not strike oil.Copy !req
291. The Cassowary...Copy !req
292. the body of the Cassowary
is extremely heavyCopy !req
293. and its wings are so shortCopy !req
294. that it has no power
to raise itselfCopy !req
295. from the ground in flight.Copy !req
296. A bony protuberanceCopy !req
297. forms on the top of the head.Copy !req
298. A sort of... helmet.Copy !req
299. Like the ostrich, this bird is
not very delicate in its taste.Copy !req
300. All right, if
you'll just please follow me,Copy !req
301. we'll be going
down there right now.Copy !req
302. Oh, sir, do you have change
for this... this half a dollar?Copy !req
303. Jesus Christ,
how do you sleep around here?Copy !req
304. Well, you get used
to that after a while.Copy !req
305. It's usually the heart
guys that cause it.Copy !req
306. What guys?Copy !req
307. We got a couple
doctors here who do transplants.Copy !req
308. They'll sit around and wait
till a stiff dies the right way.Copy !req
309. For his heart, you know?Copy !req
310. Jesus Christ.Copy !req
311. Excuse me. You can
get drinks and things later.Copy !req
312. Please stay with the tour.Copy !req
313. I'm sure you'll
really like it up here.Copy !req
314. Y'all will
get to hear something too.Copy !req
315. Like the scoreboard,
even though it's so big,Copy !req
316. it's just operated
by this small roomCopy !req
317. that has a really complicated
computer inside of it.Copy !req
318. I mean, the other day talked to a man...Copy !req
319. And they turned out some
pretty interesting stuff.Copy !req
320. But just think if somebody
really intelligentCopy !req
321. got hold of it,
what they could do.Copy !req
322. I mean, it could probably
work out some problems.Copy !req
323. Oh, look, it's Officer Ledbetter here.Copy !req
324. He just likes
my tour a lot, I guess.Copy !req
325. And as you
heard in our interview,Copy !req
326. Frank Shaft apparently
is in Houston at the expenseCopy !req
327. at the expense of Haskell WeeksCopy !req
328. to lend assistanceCopy !req
329. to local police
in their investigationCopy !req
330. of these unusual
strangulation murders.Copy !req
331. Captain Crandall's
gonna be awful angryCopy !req
332. when he finds out
how long we're taking.Copy !req
333. Look, Johnson...Copy !req
334. it is Johnson, isn't it?Copy !req
335. Yes, sir.Copy !req
336. Frank.Copy !req
337. I mean Frank.Copy !req
338. Now, we're gonna be
working together, right?Copy !req
339. Yes, sir.
Uh, Frank.Copy !req
340. Ok, I want to tell you
something about me.Copy !req
341. I don't much care how pissed off
any desk cop gets. Got it?Copy !req
342. It's working stiffs
like us that get the job done.Copy !req
343. Now, I want to go over
to where that last guy lived.Copy !req
344. Abraham Wright,
wasn't that his name?Copy !req
345. Yes, Frank, sir.Copy !req
346. Ok, we're gonna go over there
and look around, Johnson.Copy !req
347. Just you and me.Copy !req
348. The partridge...Copy !req
349. The affection of partridgesCopy !req
350. for their offspring
is peculiarly interesting.Copy !req
351. They lead them out to feed,Copy !req
352. the point out to them the
proper places for their foodCopy !req
353. and assist them in finding it
by scratching the groundCopy !req
354. with their feet.Copy !req
355. They frequently
sit close together,Copy !req
356. covering the young ones
with their wings,Copy !req
357. and from this protection,Copy !req
358. they are not easily roused.Copy !req
359. Watch out for these
big steps because we wouldn't wantCopy !req
360. anyone to trip and sue
the dome or anything.Copy !req
361. There's a lot more to see,
so everybody better hurryCopy !req
362. 'cause you're gonna
walk nine miles today.Copy !req
363. And when we get down there,
there's also a weather station.Copy !req
364. It cost a third
of a million dollars.Copy !req
365. Ok, everybody, stop here.Copy !req
366. We've got to wait
for those laggers.Copy !req
367. Last time, we had
ten people get lost...Copy !req
368. Ok, Johnson, let's go.Copy !req
369. Telephone, sir.Copy !req
370. It might be Captain Crandall
wanting to know where we are.Copy !req
371. His facial
expression never changes.Copy !req
372. His eyes are extraordinary.Copy !req
373. They're the most piercing blue
I've ever seen.Copy !req
374. Now, there's a killer loose
in the city, Johnson.Copy !req
375. Are we gonna get him or are we gonna
go downtown and play politics?Copy !req
376. - Hi.
- Hi. May I help you?Copy !req
377. I'm interested in a cameraCopy !req
378. that would allow me to do
some extremely detailed work.Copy !req
379. Sure. Sure.Copy !req
380. - Show him the Nikon, Gary.
- This one?Copy !req
381. - Yes.
- Yeah.Copy !req
382. Gary, remove the lens cap.Copy !req
383. Oh. Would there be a way
of hanging it around my neck?Copy !req
384. Grab us a neck strap, Gary.Copy !req
385. There you go.Copy !req
386. Yeah.Copy !req
387. Now, what does
something like that run?Copy !req
388. Price for this is, uh...Copy !req
389. You'll have to look it up
in the book, Gary.Copy !req
390. - Excuse me...
- Gary.Copy !req
391. My throat is killing me.Copy !req
392. Do you have any aspirin?Copy !req
393. - Aspirin?
- I'll get some throat lozenges.Copy !req
394. - You look up the price.
- Ok.Copy !req
395. Thank you.Copy !req
396. You have such a lovely smile.Copy !req
397. Oh.Copy !req
398. Well, thank you.
You have a nice smile yourself.Copy !req
399. You must be a very happy person.Copy !req
400. Well, I try to make
the best of things.Copy !req
401. Excuse me for a minute.Copy !req
402. Is there a manager around here
that I could talk to?Copy !req
403. Right back there.Copy !req
404. Uh, is there anything
I can help you with?Copy !req
405. Well, yes.Copy !req
406. Actually, I was thinking
of taking this trip,Copy !req
407. and I was thinking
of taking some snapshots.Copy !req
408. Right, that's a good idea.Copy !req
409. What kind of camera do you have?Copy !req
410. Actually, that's it.
You see, I don't have a camera.Copy !req
411. You don't have a camera?Copy !req
412. Pardon me.Copy !req
413. - What?
- Would you be interested in...Copy !req
414. - If you've got a minute.
- Just a minute, will you?Copy !req
415. Is there a difference?Copy !req
416. Yeah. I'll show you.Copy !req
417. I'd like to talk to you
for a minute if I could.Copy !req
418. Yeah, well, what about?Copy !req
419. Well, I've got a...Copy !req
420. Just a minute, lady.Copy !req
421. Who, me?Copy !req
422. Let me see your receipt.Copy !req
423. Oh, I'm sorry,
I didn't buy anything.Copy !req
424. Well, would you mind
showing me what's in your bag?Copy !req
425. Oh, surely.Copy !req
426. Uh, shampoo.Copy !req
427. - Mm-hmm.
- Shampoo.Copy !req
428. Shampoo.Copy !req
429. I always buy
three bottles at a time.Copy !req
430. Not that it's any cheaper,
but it saves me a trip.Copy !req
431. My hair's so oily, I have
to wash it every other day.Copy !req
432. Well, you've got beautiful hair.Copy !req
433. Yeah, what else is in the bag?Copy !req
434. Oh, my brush, Kleenex,
crossword puzzle book.Copy !req
435. And Band-Aids, cologne.Copy !req
436. Mouthwash.Copy !req
437. - More shampoo.
- Yeah.Copy !req
438. Not one of
them lasted more than one day.Copy !req
439. Every Saturday, poor old Mr. Wright
used to make his rounds,Copy !req
440. Every Saturday,
there was a new driver.Copy !req
441. I interviewed them.
I ought to know.Copy !req
442. Can you describe him?Copy !req
443. Down to the mole
on the back of his neck.Copy !req
444. He had a mole on his neck?Copy !req
445. No! That's just
a figure of speech.Copy !req
446. You know, like saying something
is faster than greased lightning?Copy !req
447. Yeah, I know. I know.
How tall was he?Copy !req
448. Oh, short. Very short.
Like you.Copy !req
449. I'm six-one, Millhouse.Copy !req
450. You are? I'm five-nine,Copy !req
451. and you look shorter than me.Copy !req
452. You're standing on the steps.Copy !req
453. Oh. So I am.Copy !req
454. All right, where were you
when you interviewed him?Copy !req
455. Here, right here where we are.Copy !req
456. You were up there
and he was down here?Copy !req
457. - Is that right?
- I think so.Copy !req
458. I'd so those steps
are about eight inches.Copy !req
459. So, that means that
if he was six-foot-one,Copy !req
460. he would have looked to you
to be 16 inches shorter.Copy !req
461. About four-nine.Copy !req
462. Right. Under five feet.Copy !req
463. Short. Only I think
I was down here.Copy !req
464. And... and he was there.Copy !req
465. Well, what the hell
would he be doing up here?Copy !req
466. Well, he was short, like I said.Copy !req
467. And it made him feel better.Copy !req
468. All right, he was up here
and you were down there.Copy !req
469. - Is that right?
- Right.Copy !req
470. And he looked to you
to be about four-foot-nine?Copy !req
471. That's right. Short.Copy !req
472. Jesus Christ, Millhouse,
if he was four-foot-nine,Copy !req
473. and he was standing
on 16 inches of steps,Copy !req
474. that'd make him only
three-foot-five.Copy !req
475. That's right,
he was short. Like you.Copy !req
476. There could be
no more shocking statementCopy !req
477. than to say the closest
living relativesCopy !req
478. to men are houseflies
or that the butterflyCopy !req
479. evolved from a rhinoceros.Copy !req
480. But is there any real proof?Copy !req
481. Can evolution really prove
birds came from reptiles?Copy !req
482. Birds are amazing creatures,Copy !req
483. fantastically designed,Copy !req
484. each for a different
specific purpose.Copy !req
485. What's the matter, honey?
Your leg hurt?Copy !req
486. God damn it!
Does yours?Copy !req
487. Now, here. Hold this.Copy !req
488. Come on, Douglas. Stanford
wants to see the monkeys.Copy !req
489. You shut up! I'll go when
I'm damn good and ready.Copy !req
490. You hear?Copy !req
491. Don't you want to see
the monkeys, Douglas?Copy !req
492. If I want to see some monkeys,
I'll go over to nigger town.Copy !req
493. Where do you suppose that punk
kid got a camera like that?Copy !req
494. Douglas, Stanford wants
to see the monkeys. Come on...Copy !req
495. Listen here! You want that pansy
son of yours to see some monkeys?Copy !req
496. He's your son too!Copy !req
497. You'll never convince me
that pasty-face pansyCopy !req
498. came out of Douglas B. Breen.Copy !req
499. Now, take him to the car!Copy !req
500. And wait till I get thereCopy !req
501. before I give you somethingCopy !req
502. you wish you hadn't got.Copy !req
503. The Brazilian Green Macaw...Copy !req
504. is as
beautiful as it is rare.Copy !req
505. It soon becomes familiar with
persons whom it sees frequently.Copy !req
506. But it has an aversion
to strangers and sometimesCopy !req
507. attacks them with great fury.Copy !req
508. Hey, that's a nice looking
camera you got there.Copy !req
509. Jap camera, ain't it?Copy !req
510. - Yeah, a Nikon.
- Yeah, that's what I thought.Copy !req
511. Hey, you hear
what the Jap girl saidCopy !req
512. when she took off her brassiere?Copy !req
513. How'd you like to nip on these?Copy !req
514. You get it?Copy !req
515. “Nip on these,"
you know. Tits... nip.Copy !req
516. Hey, that must have
set you back a pretty penny.Copy !req
517. No, this was
a present from my grandfather.Copy !req
518. Ah, what's your grandfather?
Some Jew millionaire?Copy !req
519. He's, uh...
he's a ship's carpenterCopy !req
520. in the Merchant Marines.Copy !req
521. So every time he goes to Japan,Copy !req
522. he brings me back something
like a lens or a tripod.Copy !req
523. Parental behavior when an
intruder disturbs or endangersCopy !req
524. the nest or young,Copy !req
525. some birds slip away quietly
and unobtrusively.Copy !req
526. Some may attack the intruder.Copy !req
527. - Take it easy.
- Get over there!Copy !req
528. You know what that is?Copy !req
529. A poorly rolled cigarette.Copy !req
530. It's a marijuana cigarette.
It's dope!Copy !req
531. It's dope I picked upCopy !req
532. after I saw you drop it
out of your pocket.Copy !req
533. You give me that camera and
we'll forget this little matter.Copy !req
534. If you don't, it's one to ten.Copy !req
535. So take your pick, kid.Copy !req
536. Mister, one of us is crazy.Copy !req
537. Oh, yeah?Copy !req
538. Breen. Narcotics.Copy !req
539. Being a murderer's bad enough,Copy !req
540. but a thief on top of it?Copy !req
541. What do you mean, a thief?Copy !req
542. He took one
of Mr. Wright's books.Copy !req
543. - Lieutenant!
- Wait a minute, Johnson.Copy !req
544. What do you mean he took
one of Mr. Wright's books?Copy !req
545. He came here for a book.Copy !req
546. He said Mr. Wright
sent him for it.Copy !req
547. And little did I know
that the poor old man was dead.Copy !req
548. - Frank...
- Which book did he take?Copy !req
549. This one right here,Copy !req
550. where this empty space is.Copy !req
551. - I hate to interrupt...
- What is it?Copy !req
552. Well, there's been another one
over at the zoo.Copy !req
553. - Strangling?
- Yes, sir. Uh, Frank.Copy !req
554. Jesus Christ.Copy !req
555. What was the name of the book?Copy !req
556. I don't know
the name of the book.Copy !req
557. It was given to Mr. Wright
by his two brothersCopy !req
558. a long time ago.Copy !req
559. Man's first
successful powered flight,Copy !req
560. on windswept sand dunes
near Kitty Hawk,Copy !req
561. five men and a boy witnessed
the first successful flightCopy !req
562. of an engine driven heavier
than air flying machine.Copy !req
563. But it was hardly a bird.Copy !req
564. About what?
About three-inch diameter?Copy !req
565. It doesn't look like he's got
any holes anywhere here.Copy !req
566. Is he a friend of yours,
Johnson, this Officer Breen?Copy !req
567. No, he's in narcotics.Copy !req
568. I'm in traffic.Copy !req
569. No, the only
narcotics man I ever metCopy !req
570. was my wife's cousin Benny.Copy !req
571. He got busted for trafficking.Copy !req
572. It's kind of funny.Copy !req
573. Isn't it? I mean,
he gets busted for traffickingCopy !req
574. and I'm in traffic.Copy !req
575. Hey, do you suppose that
the strangler was a hophead?Copy !req
576. A what?Copy !req
577. You know, a dope addict.Copy !req
578. I don't know, Johnson.Copy !req
579. - Captain Crandall?
- Yeah, Hanes.Copy !req
580. Hines.Copy !req
581. - Yeah.
- I just found this over here.Copy !req
582. What the hell is it?Copy !req
583. I believe it's marijuana.Copy !req
584. You think so?Copy !req
585. I'll check that.Copy !req
586. Mrs. Green, would you
and the kid get out of hereCopy !req
587. for about a minute?Copy !req
588. Yeah.Copy !req
589. Matt, what about this?Copy !req
590. Is that marijuana?Copy !req
591. Well, there's no way, uh...
What do you think?Copy !req
592. There's only one way to tell.Copy !req
593. - Send it to the lab.
- Oh.Copy !req
594. Well, we're
nearly there, Lieutenant.Copy !req
595. I mean Frank.Copy !req
596. All right, pull over here.Copy !req
597. - What?
- Pull over right here.Copy !req
598. - Here?
- Pull over. Park.Copy !req
599. Ok, Johnson, let's go.Copy !req
600. There's no point in them
knowing we're friends.Copy !req
601. And how about his head?Copy !req
602. Where in the hell's
he been, Johnson?Copy !req
603. This is Captain Crandall.Copy !req
604. Frank Shaft, San Francisco.Copy !req
605. How long's he been dead?Copy !req
606. Your plane got in
three and a half hours ago.Copy !req
607. What I'd like to know is where
in the hell have you been?Copy !req
608. Excuse me, Lieutenant.Copy !req
609. Permit me to introduce myself.
I'm Haskell Weeks.Copy !req
610. Frank Shaft.Copy !req
611. Welcome to Houston,
Lieutenant Shaft.Copy !req
612. And allow me to apologize
for Captain Crandall, here.Copy !req
613. He's a good police officer,Copy !req
614. but I'm afraid he has not, as yet,Copy !req
615. mastered the simple art
of common courtesy,Copy !req
616. have you, captain?Copy !req
617. What the hell are you doing?Copy !req
618. I told you fellas to
keep over there behind the line!Copy !req
619. Bullshit.Copy !req
620. I'll convey your
sentiments to the governor.Copy !req
621. The governor and I are very close.Copy !req
622. This the way
he was found, Captain?Copy !req
623. Captain, aren't you
going to answer the lieutenant?Copy !req
624. Look, I'm in charge
of this case, Weeks.Copy !req
625. If you want this California
hot shot to work on it,Copy !req
626. he'll work my way.
You understand?Copy !req
627. Of course that's
the way he was found.Copy !req
628. What do you think we
are, stupid?Copy !req
629. - Was he on a case?
- I don't know.Copy !req
630. I'm in traffic.Copy !req
631. Was he on a case?Copy !req
632. - Hanes?
- Hines.Copy !req
633. - Was he in a case?
- No, sir.Copy !req
634. Everybody's on the case
whether off duty or on.Copy !req
635. Texas is
a big state, Lieutenant.Copy !req
636. And there are still some of us
here who don't realize...Copy !req
637. Can't you get
that turtle out of here?Copy !req
638. - This his camera?
- Yeah, the film's been taken out.Copy !req
639. He probably spotted the killer,Copy !req
640. followed him and was making
some pictures, you know?Copy !req
641. Fingerprints?Copy !req
642. Yeah, I think we'll be able
to get some good ones from that.Copy !req
643. Ok, well, let's make sure everything's
covered before we release it to his family.Copy !req
644. What about them?Copy !req
645. Huh?Copy !req
646. Who's gonna
tell his wife and kid?Copy !req
647. Ah, I don't know.Copy !req
648. What's this stuff on his eye?Copy !req
649. That's, uh...
It's bird...Copy !req
650. It's... you know...Copy !req
651. Bird shit.Copy !req
652. Jesus Christ.
Why didn't you cover him up?Copy !req
653. That happened before.
It was there when we found him.Copy !req
654. They all had it on 'em.Copy !req
655. All of 'em?Copy !req
656. Every one.Copy !req
657. It's the time of year.Copy !req
658. - You know my car's completely ruined?
- Shit.Copy !req
659. If you have any problemCopy !req
660. in our city, Lieutenant,Copy !req
661. feel free to call on me.Copy !req
662. And if you get a spare moment,
we'll have a cocktail together.Copy !req
663. I'm an old friend
of your mayor's.Copy !req
664. Are you through yet, Shaft?Copy !req
665. I want to know
what kind of bird it was.Copy !req
666. God almighty.Copy !req
667. Let's go, Norwood.Copy !req
668. Wing muscles.Copy !req
669. Approximately
50 different wing muscles...Copy !req
670. and muscle slipsCopy !req
671. have been described as affecting
the wing...Copy !req
672. Brewster!Copy !req
673. It's me. Hope.Copy !req
674. Hi, Brewster.Copy !req
675. I've been living
on graham crackers for a week.Copy !req
676. - I got your stuff.
- And my peanut butter?Copy !req
677. Uh-huh. I almost got
caught stealing the rose hips.Copy !req
678. Thank you.Copy !req
679. Brewster, what's
the difference between rose hipsCopy !req
680. and regular vitamin C?Copy !req
681. They're organic.Copy !req
682. What does "organic" mean?Copy !req
683. Hope, you're the one who
works in the health food store,Copy !req
684. You're the one
who's supposed to know that.Copy !req
685. Mrs. Parker
never tells me anything.Copy !req
686. She just yells at me.
Date nut bread?Copy !req
687. Yeah, do me a favor,
put 'em on the table.Copy !req
688. I gotta finish my exercises.Copy !req
689. I got you coconut pecan
cookies with raw sugarCopy !req
690. and unbleached flour and...Copy !req
691. We're all right.Copy !req
692. And, um...Copy !req
693. chocolate covered
raisins for energy.Copy !req
694. Wow, Brewster.Copy !req
695. You're really in great shape.Copy !req
696. How many of those can you do?Copy !req
697. Hundreds.Copy !req
698. Oh, wow.Copy !req
699. I gotta do 'em.Copy !req
700. I brought my own lunch, too.Copy !req
701. Hot dog.Copy !req
702. Brewster?Copy !req
703. Tell me again
what you're doing here.Copy !req
704. What do you think I'm doing?Copy !req
705. I know you're doing chin-ups,
but I mean,Copy !req
706. what's the rest of it about?Copy !req
707. I'm building my wings.Copy !req
708. You're making an airplane?Copy !req
709. No.Copy !req
710. What are you doing?Copy !req
711. I'm flying away.Copy !req
712. Where are you flying to?Copy !req
713. Away.Copy !req
714. Wow.Copy !req
715. Brewster...Copy !req
716. Do you ever think about
anything except flying?Copy !req
717. Sure.Copy !req
718. You think about girls?Copy !req
719. Brewster?Copy !req
720. Yeah, all the time.Copy !req
721. Oh, wow.Copy !req
722. What are you up to?Copy !req
723. - Huh?
- 215.Copy !req
724. 215?Copy !req
725. Brewster!Copy !req
726. Are you thinking about me or
are you thinking about flying?Copy !req
727. Oh! Oh, Brewster!Copy !req
728. What are you up to?
Tell me! Please!Copy !req
729. What are you up to?Copy !req
730. Huh? What are you up to?Copy !req
731. 253!Copy !req
732. Wow.Copy !req
733. Wow!Copy !req
734. What? Oh, what?Copy !req
735. Wow, Brewster.Copy !req
736. You're really something.Copy !req
737. The... the Jackdaw
is easily trainedCopy !req
738. and made with little difficulty to be
taught to pronounce several words.Copy !req
739. Now, listen, tonight...Copy !req
740. Listen. I'm gonna
take you over there, right?Copy !req
741. - Marty, don't answer it.
- You know I have to, Angie.Copy !req
742. Hello.Copy !req
743. Johnson, this is Frank Shaft.Copy !req
744. How do you do,
Lieutenant Shaft? Uh, Frank.Copy !req
745. I didn't interrupt
your dinner, did I?Copy !req
746. Hmm? Oh, uh...Copy !req
747. No, I...Copy !req
748. finished about an hour ago.Copy !req
749. Good.Copy !req
750. Listen, I want you to take these
bird shit samplesCopy !req
751. over to the lab.Copy !req
752. Right now, sir?
Uh, Frank?Copy !req
753. I'd do it myself
but I'm busy right now.Copy !req
754. I need somebody
I can trust on this.Copy !req
755. Well, I'm, uh...
I'm, uh...Copy !req
756. right out the door now.Copy !req
757. Johnson, you're a good cop.Copy !req
758. Near the sky box,
also the presidential suite,Copy !req
759. is the white areaCopy !req
760. over there to the right
of the Texico sign.Copy !req
761. That's where President Johnson
views the game fromCopy !req
762. when he's here at the stadium.Copy !req
763. And if President Nixon
ever attends,Copy !req
764. he'll watch
the game from that box.Copy !req
765. But after baseball season...Copy !req
766. Hi, Louise.Copy !req
767. Hi, Brewster.Copy !req
768. That girl was here.Copy !req
769. Hope? Yep.Copy !req
770. I got a whole
new thing of health food.Copy !req
771. I did 300 today.Copy !req
772. Nothing goes on
between you two, does it?Copy !req
773. Me and Hope?Copy !req
774. She seems so passionate.Copy !req
775. I really didn't notice.Copy !req
776. You ever think about
that sort of thing?Copy !req
777. What?Copy !req
778. Girls. You know.Copy !req
779. Sex?Copy !req
780. Hey, Louise, I think
you've been talking to Hope.Copy !req
781. She just asked me
the same exact thing.Copy !req
782. All right, Brewster.Copy !req
783. Time to relax.Copy !req
784. Come on, we have to stay
on schedule.Copy !req
785. Why do you always
ask me about Hope?Copy !req
786. Because she's passionate
and she can involve you.Copy !req
787. Involve me?
In what?Copy !req
788. Sex.Copy !req
789. Is Hope really like that?Copy !req
790. People like Hope accept
what's been told to them.Copy !req
791. They don't think
they can be free.Copy !req
792. They don't even
believe they can be free.Copy !req
793. Their sex is the closest
thing they have to...Copy !req
794. Flying.Copy !req
795. Yes. Flying.Copy !req
796. Don't they want to fly?Copy !req
797. Only at first.Copy !req
798. Something happens
to them as they grow.Copy !req
799. And they...Copy !req
800. They turn
more and more toward earth.Copy !req
801. When they experience sex,
they simply settle for it.Copy !req
802. And procreate
more of their own kind.Copy !req
803. So you must never be tempted,Copy !req
804. let anything take your full
concentration away from your work.Copy !req
805. I don't think I could
do it without your help.Copy !req
806. I'll always be here
to help you, Brewster.Copy !req
807. I'll be with you
until you can fly away.Copy !req
808. Instead of a prayer at this time,Copy !req
809. the widow, Mrs. Green,
has requested I read insteadCopy !req
810. the departed's favorite poem,
words be glad to live by.Copy !req
811. "How do I love thee?
Let me count the waysCopy !req
812. I love thee to the breadth and
depth and height of my soul...Copy !req
813. How do I love thee?
Let me count the waysCopy !req
814. I love thee to the breadth and depth
and height my soul can reach..."Copy !req
815. I can't put into words
how I personally feelCopy !req
816. about this brave officer
who died so nobly.Copy !req
817. Bullshit.Copy !req
818. Speaking for myself
and my entire staff.Copy !req
819. Save it, Weeks.Copy !req
820. Green was a bad cop, and that
camera was hot for Christ's sake.Copy !req
821. He was a thief as well
as a shake-down artist.Copy !req
822. May I remind you that he
died in the line of duty.Copy !req
823. Shit, he was on vacation.Copy !req
824. "In my old griefs,
and with my childhood's faithCopy !req
825. I love thee with..."Copy !req
826. I'm having a few friends over for
dinner this evening, Lieutenant,Copy !req
827. I thought you might
like to join us.Copy !req
828. I'll be busy.Copy !req
829. I might remind you that my friends
are not without influence.Copy !req
830. Good, then they won't miss me,
will they?Copy !req
831. Protective plumage...Copy !req
832. prolonged rains
are destructive to bird lifeCopy !req
833. because the insulating value of plumage
deteriorates as it becomes wet.Copy !req
834. Bye!Copy !req
835. - Hi.
- Hi.Copy !req
836. Are you trying to steal my car?Copy !req
837. What?Copy !req
838. I asked you if you
were trying to steal my car.Copy !req
839. Is this your car?Copy !req
840. It looks exactly like my car.Copy !req
841. Uh, you even have the little
statue in front like mine.Copy !req
842. That's the Virgin Mary.Copy !req
843. They used to be real popular
a long time ago.Copy !req
844. This is a very weird...Copy !req
845. there aren't too many orange
and black cars around, you know.Copy !req
846. Uh, I apologize. I didn't...Copy !req
847. Hey, I don't mind you
trying to steal my car.Copy !req
848. And besides it was raining
and everything.Copy !req
849. You don't wanna catch a cold,
do you?Copy !req
850. No.Copy !req
851. You look like the type
that catches cold pretty easily.Copy !req
852. I'll take you where
you're gonna go.Copy !req
853. Uh, I would like to pick up a few
photos that I'm having printed.Copy !req
854. Pictures?Copy !req
855. I love pictures.
Are they in color?Copy !req
856. Yeah.Copy !req
857. Well, let's go.
You're the chauffeur.Copy !req
858. McCloud, are you
happy here working?Copy !req
859. Courtship is ordinarily
the province of the male,Copy !req
860. and he shows his wares
before the femaleCopy !req
861. with an astonishing
assortment of tricksCopy !req
862. of varying according
to the species.Copy !req
863. He may postureCopy !req
864. so as to reveal
his gaudiest nuptial plumage.Copy !req
865. Spread his tail and erect
his crestCopy !req
866. or inflate brilliantly colored
pouchesCopy !req
867. and parade, dance, fly
with dizzying acrobatics.Copy !req
868. Sing his most
fetching love song.Copy !req
869. You were on the tour,
weren't you?Copy !req
870. Tour?Copy !req
871. Yeah, I liked it.Copy !req
872. You kept ducking out all the
time. Did I bore you?Copy !req
873. I had to go to the bathroom.Copy !req
874. Oh, diarrhea. That's tough.Copy !req
875. Hope it wasn't from eating
Mexican food. That's bad.Copy !req
876. But that's when I
usually get it.Copy !req
877. Have you ever had diarrhea
from eating Mexican food before?Copy !req
878. I like your car.Copy !req
879. It's not mine, really.Copy !req
880. I met this guy at the racetrack.
Automobile races.Copy !req
881. You know, stock cars, midgets.Copy !req
882. Anyway, I'm a race car driver.Copy !req
883. I don't have a car or anything,Copy !req
884. but sometimes some of the guys
let me drive for them.Copy !req
885. Anyway, one night this guy
offered to take me home.Copy !req
886. So I said ok.Copy !req
887. Well, instead of taking me home,
he took me to Memorial Park.Copy !req
888. I mean, wow, he
tried to rape me.Copy !req
889. Anyway, I hit him with a
lug wrench and drove home.Copy !req
890. I haven't seen him since so I've
got this neat little Roadrunner.Copy !req
891. How long ago was that?Copy !req
892. A couple of weeks.Copy !req
893. Does he know where you live?Copy !req
894. No, maybe that's why he never
came to pick it up.Copy !req
895. And it's really sort
of a neat little car.Copy !req
896. It's all souped up
and everything. See?Copy !req
897. "I love thee freely,
as men strive for rightCopy !req
898. I love thee purely,
as men turns from praiseCopy !req
899. I love thee with passion
put to useCopy !req
900. In my old griefs,
and with my... “Copy !req
901. - Hey!
- What?Copy !req
902. Come on, for God's sake.Copy !req
903. "I love thee with a loveCopy !req
904. I seemed to lose
with my lost saintsCopy !req
905. I love thee with..."Copy !req
906. “I choose to love thee
better every day"Copy !req
907. Oh, God.Copy !req
908. That's fantastic.Copy !req
909. That'll be $468.50, sir.Copy !req
910. Uh, yeah, you charge that
for me, will ya?Copy !req
911. Oh, those are the
biggest snapshots I ever seen.Copy !req
912. Yeah.Copy !req
913. They sure are pretty, though.
What are they?Copy !req
914. These are studies of the yutaxican
diasteraxic arrangements of theCopy !req
915. major covetan secondaries of
the phoenicopteridae.Copy !req
916. Oh, I thought maybe they were pictures
of your mother and father at the beach.Copy !req
917. No, these are photos that I took
at the zoo of various birds.Copy !req
918. I was just joking, Brewster.Copy !req
919. Huh?Copy !req
920. I tell you what, I got this great
dinner planned tonight at my house,Copy !req
921. so how'd you like to come over?Copy !req
922. Oh, fine. Fine.Copy !req
923. - Uh-huh.
- What is it?Copy !req
924. Uric acids, amino acids.Copy !req
925. Formers of glucose,
traces of saturated almond.Copy !req
926. Whoops!Copy !req
927. It's bird shit, for Christ's sake.
We all know that.Copy !req
928. Is this how you got your rep, Sheriff,
running around collecting shit samples?Copy !req
929. What kind of a bird
did it come from?Copy !req
930. Well, we couldn't tell you that.Copy !req
931. Tell you what it ate,Copy !req
932. but I don't think we can determine
what kind of bird it came from.Copy !req
933. Besides, it might
not have been a bird.Copy !req
934. I know bird shit when I see it.Copy !req
935. Now, I suggest we drop
this bird shit shitCopy !req
936. and settle down to some
old-fashioned police work.Copy !req
937. You go ahead and do your
old-fashioned police work, Captain,Copy !req
938. and leave me alone to work
in my own way.Copy !req
939. This is my department, Sheriff.Copy !req
940. I was under the impression that I
could handle this case my way,Copy !req
941. is that true or what?Copy !req
942. We don't have to draw such
fine lines, gentlemen,Copy !req
943. we're all after the same thing.Copy !req
944. Not necessarily.Copy !req
945. I doubt it even come
from a bird.Copy !req
946. I'll just assume I
did not hear that.Copy !req
947. What else could've done it?Copy !req
948. A snake, toad maybe.
Maybe even one of those turtles.Copy !req
949. Christ, I've heard
of everything. Turtle shit.Copy !req
950. We could've told more if you hadn't of
broken the geometric composition, you know?Copy !req
951. Besides this is only a small
portion. It's not a full sample.Copy !req
952. Lieutenant, perhaps you'd like
to reconsider my invitation for dinner.Copy !req
953. I tell ya, maybe a scatologist
could help.Copy !req
954. What's a scatologist?Copy !req
955. There will be some people there
who can be very useful to one's career.Copy !req
956. You know, shit.Copy !req
957. Can you get us one?Copy !req
958. There's a guy over at the University of
Houston who's supposed to be pretty good.Copy !req
959. Should we say
nine o' clock, then?Copy !req
960. I really don't have time for
this small talk, Mr. Weeks.Copy !req
961. I hope you're not being
hostile, Lieutenant.Copy !req
962. May I remind you that it was I
who brought you in on this case.Copy !req
963. There's a message here for you.Copy !req
964. Read it. Read it. Go on.Copy !req
965. Well, there's something
confidential about it.Copy !req
966. There's nothing confidential in the
police department. Read it, Hanes.Copy !req
967. "Hines."Copy !req
968. Your mother says that when
you pick up the olive oil,Copy !req
969. you should also get some romaine.Copy !req
970. Pollution. Of greater
importance than ever beforeCopy !req
971. is the bird's adaptation
to the new conditions.Copy !req
972. Since man, his traps, his guns
and his pollution...Copy !req
973. have come upon the scene,Copy !req
974. upsetting all the order of
nature and slowly,Copy !req
975. surely, claiming the whole
earth for himselfCopy !req
976. and his own destruction.Copy !req
977. Hi, nice to see you.Copy !req
978. There's still no guarantee that
that film came from Green's camera.Copy !req
979. But all the pictures
were taken at the zoo.Copy !req
980. What the hell does that mean?Copy !req
981. Everybody takes pictures at the
goddamn zoo.Copy !req
982. They think they got a picture.
They got in these cameras.Copy !req
983. Never mind this, where's Hanes?Copy !req
984. - “Hines."
- Where is Shaft?Copy !req
985. He's in the back in the lab.Copy !req
986. - Wendell?
- What is it?Copy !req
987. How you doing?Copy !req
988. I'm putting it in the soup now.Copy !req
989. We got a lot of important fuzz
out here.Copy !req
990. You call us when we
can see that thing.Copy !req
991. - Well?
- It's in the soup now.Copy !req
992. I started racing 'cause of
this guy I was in love with.Copy !req
993. His name was Bernard and he
was a really neat artist.Copy !req
994. He used to do etchings
on cider bottles.Copy !req
995. Boy, was he a genius.Copy !req
996. He was beautiful, too.Copy !req
997. He had hair out to here.Copy !req
998. But his daddy was rich and made him
cut his hair and then go into politics.Copy !req
999. Evidently he didn't get too far
though 'cause he's only a secretary.Copy !req
1000. Anyway, the whole deal made me so mad, I
broke every one of his cider bottles.Copy !req
1001. Especially the one
he dedicated to me.Copy !req
1002. When is the goddamn picture
going to be ready?Copy !req
1003. Wendel's working on the
negatives right now.Copy !req
1004. Color lab?Copy !req
1005. I'll see. Is there a
Lieutenant Shaft here?Copy !req
1006. This your bourbon?Copy !req
1007. Haskell Weeks here, Lieutenant.Copy !req
1008. I understand you might
have a lead.Copy !req
1009. The lab had an electronic
surveillance camera.Copy !req
1010. We'll have the film
in a few minutes.Copy !req
1011. Why don't you
come sit over here with me?Copy !req
1012. No, I gotta be going now,
I think.Copy !req
1013. Brewster, here I am sitting over
here on the couch,Copy !req
1014. and inviting you to do,
well, who knows what?Copy !req
1015. And you just sit there and say,
"Oh, no, I've gotta go home."Copy !req
1016. Yeah, I do gotta go home,
though.Copy !req
1017. I think I'll
have a little of that.Copy !req
1018. Don't you get it?
You're in traffic and...Copy !req
1019. Oh, I'm sorry. I thought
this was the ladies' room.Copy !req
1020. - What?
- What the hell is that?Copy !req
1021. Do you think you can get a decent
description of the man who brought it in?Copy !req
1022. Well, Lieutenant,Copy !req
1023. why don't you drop over here
for an after-dinner drink?Copy !req
1024. There's someone here who'd very
much like to meet you.Copy !req
1025. It's not my fault this time.Copy !req
1026. The red light was on,Copy !req
1027. and the door's supposed to be
closed when the red light is on.Copy !req
1028. That's the rule.Copy !req
1029. Thanks!Copy !req
1030. Christ.Copy !req
1031. Well, is he coming?Copy !req
1032. I'm afraid not, Senator.Copy !req
1033. He's a very dedicated man.Copy !req
1034. What about them ballplayers?Copy !req
1035. Curfew, Senator. They have a
very strict... curfew.Copy !req
1036. Astronauts? Does he know
any astronauts?Copy !req
1037. Weeks!Copy !req
1038. Aren't you going to kiss me?Copy !req
1039. I don't know how.Copy !req
1040. Brewster, are you a virgin?Copy !req
1041. Am I a virgin?Copy !req
1042. I bet you live with your mother,
don't you?Copy !req
1043. No, I live by myself.Copy !req
1044. - Where?
- By the Dome, in a room.Copy !req
1045. I gotta get going. It'll take me
a while to get back.Copy !req
1046. Oh, look, take my car.Copy !req
1047. I can get a ride with Nicki.Copy !req
1048. She works at the Dome, too.Copy !req
1049. You can meet me there at 4:00,
and I'll get my car then.Copy !req
1050. How's that for a good plan?Copy !req
1051. Ok.Copy !req
1052. That way I'll get
to see you tomorrow.Copy !req
1053. Goodbye.Copy !req
1054. Don't forget 4:00.Copy !req
1055. Hey, boy!Copy !req
1056. Where the hell you think
you're going with that car?Copy !req
1057. Pardon me?Copy !req
1058. "Pardon me," my ass.Copy !req
1059. That car belongs to Billy Joe
Goodwill, and that happens to be me.Copy !req
1060. And I've been chasing you down
for a long time.Copy !req
1061. I think you've made an error.Copy !req
1062. There's been a goddamn error
made, all right.Copy !req
1063. But you and that dingy
girlfriend of yoursCopy !req
1064. are the one that made the error.Copy !req
1065. And now I'm fixed
to strum your head,Copy !req
1066. and when I get through with you,Copy !req
1067. I'm gonna go up to...Copy !req
1068. What do you have
on this guy, Harry?Copy !req
1069. Well, his name
was Billy Joe Goodwill.Copy !req
1070. Goodwill?Copy !req
1071. There seems to be some
connection with racecar drivers.Copy !req
1072. Can you tell me when the
guy died? Can you find that out?Copy !req
1073. The Widow Green
got the full pension.Copy !req
1074. To hell with the Widow Green,
we got another murder on our hands.Copy !req
1075. Say, are you with the lab?Copy !req
1076. He's got a very good reputation.Copy !req
1077. What kind of reputation?Copy !req
1078. The Santa Barbara Strangler
surrendered to him.Copy !req
1079. The Santa Barbara Strangler...
surrendered himself.Copy !req
1080. He surrendered himself, see?
He must have trusted him.Copy !req
1081. It's a goddamn waste
of time, you ask me.Copy !req
1082. It could yield a clue.
I know it seems far-fetched.Copy !req
1083. What sort of clue are
we going to get from bird shit?Copy !req
1084. - Well, you can't...
- What happened? Is anybody hurt?Copy !req
1085. No, everything's all right,
young lady.Copy !req
1086. We're just having a drill
for the ambulance drivers.Copy !req
1087. They need a little training,
you know?Copy !req
1088. You run along.
We take care of things.Copy !req
1089. - Oh,
- Jesus Christ.Copy !req
1090. Hey, Brewster.
Right on time! Wow!Copy !req
1091. Where you going?Copy !req
1092. I wanna be by myself.
I need some time to think.Copy !req
1093. Why don't you come with me?Copy !req
1094. Nah, I think I'll take a walk.Copy !req
1095. Yeah, I'd really like
to go with you.Copy !req
1096. Ok.Copy !req
1097. Dammit.Copy !req
1098. Come on, right now.Copy !req
1099. This sample here isCopy !req
1100. the excrement that we took
off Officer Green's bodyCopy !req
1101. while the second one here is the sample we
took off the last victim, Mr. Goodwill.Copy !req
1102. I think that we can definitely say that
these two samples came from the same bird.Copy !req
1103. You sure it was a bird?Copy !req
1104. It wasn't no flying turtle,
was it?Copy !req
1105. Sarcasm so early in the day,
Captain?Copy !req
1106. Yes, we can definitely
say it was a bird.Copy !req
1107. What kind of bird?Copy !req
1108. Well, we can't
really say about that,Copy !req
1109. but we can be sure that
it was from a small bird.Copy !req
1110. Perhaps a pigeon
or a small pheasantCopy !req
1111. or perhaps a...
perhaps a raven.Copy !req
1112. Well, the guy's a bird freak.
It's probably a pet.Copy !req
1113. Yeah? Yeah?Copy !req
1114. Well, you just look for some kook
with a bird on his shoulder.Copy !req
1115. We'll be running down a
1970 orange Roadrunner...Copy !req
1116. It's mango.Copy !req
1117. "orange" Roadrunner,
license plate number...Copy !req
1118. D-U-V-2-2-2.Copy !req
1119. I want a pickup on that car, and
it's dangerous.Copy !req
1120. Who might that be, Captain?Copy !req
1121. Goodwill's car, it's missing.
Yeah.Copy !req
1122. The killer probably has it,
but he won't keep it for longCopy !req
1123. so let's get going, Hanes.Copy !req
1124. - "Hines."
- Watch it there.Copy !req
1125. Perhaps Captain Crandall
is right.Copy !req
1126. Perhaps you should not have been brought
in on the case at all, Lieu... Lieutenant.Copy !req
1127. I'd like to go on record
right now.Copy !req
1128. I do not...Copy !req
1129. admire a man who uses others as a
stepping stone to gain his own ends.Copy !req
1130. What is this?Copy !req
1131. Come on, Brewster,
you're going to love it.Copy !req
1132. Calling
all cars, calling all cars.Copy !req
1133. Be on the lookout for a 1970
mango-orange Roadrunner,Copy !req
1134. license number D-U-V-2-2-2.Copy !req
1135. Approach with caution, y'all,
occupant is considered dangerous.Copy !req
1136. That is all.Copy !req
1137. All right, Johnson, here it is:Copy !req
1138. Take Memorial to West Loop
South,Copy !req
1139. take West Loop South
to South Beach.Copy !req
1140. I'll ride 59 to Post Oak Road and
I'll meet you on West Loop South.Copy !req
1141. Now, if you see him, don't get
heroic.Copy !req
1142. Just hang back and call me.Copy !req
1143. We don't know what he'll do if
he sees a squad car.Copy !req
1144. - Got it?
- Yes, sir.Copy !req
1145. - Frank.
- I mean Frank.Copy !req
1146. Ok, let's go, Johnson.Copy !req
1147. Welcome aboard, crew, my name's Gina,
and I'm gonna be your guide right now.Copy !req
1148. Are there any people on board from out
of state, out of town or foreigners?Copy !req
1149. Yes, sir, where are you from?Copy !req
1150. - Mississippi.
- Mississippi.Copy !req
1151. - Well, how's Mr. Sippi?
- Fine.Copy !req
1152. Fine, well, good.Copy !req
1153. Among forms of behavior
which show great stereotypesCopy !req
1154. are those that have to do
with care of the body surface.Copy !req
1155. To bathe in water, most species
immerse the head, suddenly raise itCopy !req
1156. and then begin beating the wing.Copy !req
1157. Look up there to your right,
there's our famous god, Boomba.Copy !req
1158. Every time I think of all the
years you've spent with that monster,Copy !req
1159. I just start shaking.Copy !req
1160. You didn't deserve that.Copy !req
1161. I mean, he was a monster.
That was all he was.Copy !req
1162. You deserve the best. Not
to say that I'm the best.Copy !req
1163. Now, we're entering to the
land of the Shirley Indian tribe.Copy !req
1164. See that temple they built?Copy !req
1165. Well, you'll never guess
what we call it,Copy !req
1166. the Shirley Temple.Copy !req
1167. And you know, we're thinking of
painting that Shirley Temple black.Copy !req
1168. Say, Rob, you haven't seen
a Roadrunner around hereCopy !req
1169. with a racing-type setup, have you?Copy !req
1170. Uh, no. Is something wrong?Copy !req
1171. Oh, great,
another parking ticket.Copy !req
1172. I don't even know
why. They're a waste of paper.Copy !req
1173. Think we got a line
on the Strangler.Copy !req
1174. Yeah, license number
D-U-V-2-2-2.Copy !req
1175. Why, I just gave them...Copy !req
1176. Ho!Copy !req
1177. Frank.Copy !req
1178. 2-3-12... 2-3-12
to mobile unit 710.Copy !req
1179. 2-3-12 to mobile unit 710.Copy !req
1180. Over.Copy !req
1181. Yeah, what is it, Johnson?Copy !req
1182. I've got him, sir... Frank.Copy !req
1183. D-U-V-2-2-2,
right in front of me.Copy !req
1184. Jesus Christ, Johnson,
I told you to call me.Copy !req
1185. You were just supposed
to spot him and call me.Copy !req
1186. Well, that's all I've done, sir. I
spotted them, they haven't spotted me.Copy !req
1187. Look, they're right
in front of me.Copy !req
1188. They don't even know
I'm behind them.Copy !req
1189. I'm incognito. I don't
have my light on or anything.Copy !req
1190. Where?Copy !req
1191. I'm on the south loop
going west,Copy !req
1192. so if you take the Old Spanish Trail
going east, you can head them off.Copy !req
1193. Ok, keep in sight of a save act.Copy !req
1194. When you see me, call.Copy !req
1195. 2-3-12 clear.Copy !req
1196. Clear.Copy !req
1197. 2-3-12 to mobile unit 710.Copy !req
1198. Yep?Copy !req
1199. I'm at a stoplight one block south
from Old Spanish Trail, over.Copy !req
1200. Ok, Jonathan, I see you.Copy !req
1201. Jesus Christ.Copy !req
1202. I've got them, Frank.Copy !req
1203. You all right, Mother,
it's not too hot for you?Copy !req
1204. You wanna look this way?
You wanna look right at me?Copy !req
1205. - That's great.
- That's where I'm looking.Copy !req
1206. Ok, wanna hold it.Copy !req
1207. Can I ask you
to switch places here?Copy !req
1208. Could you... That's great.Copy !req
1209. Should I be standing
next to Hines?Copy !req
1210. Yeah.Copy !req
1211. Ok. Hold it, don't move.Copy !req
1212. Ah!Copy !req
1213. Police business, ma'am.
Would you follow that car?Copy !req
1214. Follow that car?
I'd love to.Copy !req
1215. Are you all right?Copy !req
1216. My legs are crushed.
I'm trapped in here.Copy !req
1217. I'll get some help.Copy !req
1218. That won't be necessary.Copy !req
1219. Brewster!Copy !req
1220. Brewster! Brewster!Copy !req
1221. Brewster! Ham and
buckwheat honey!Copy !req
1222. Whoo!Copy !req
1223. Brewster, I'm watching
the ball game.Copy !req
1224. Oh, oh, Brewster!Copy !req
1225. Come over to the...
Brewster.Copy !req
1226. Oh, let's count.Copy !req
1227. One, two, three, four!Copy !req
1228. Oh, Brewster, I can't hear you.
Come on!Copy !req
1229. Brewster, they were bind!Copy !req
1230. One, two... Come on!Copy !req
1231. Brewster?Copy !req
1232. It's hot in here.Copy !req
1233. Aren't you going to
take off your coat?Copy !req
1234. Boy, am I sweating.Copy !req
1235. That was some race, huh?Copy !req
1236. Those cops really hung in there.Copy !req
1237. Brewster, I can't hear you!Copy !req
1238. 212!Copy !req
1239. I can't hear you!Copy !req
1240. Come on, Brewster,
we were dying!Copy !req
1241. I meant to get you
buckwheat honey,Copy !req
1242. but I made a mistake
and got you coconut banana.Copy !req
1243. That was your first time,
wasn't it?Copy !req
1244. Mm-hmm.Copy !req
1245. That means that I'm responsible
for you from now on.Copy !req
1246. When will I get
to see you again?Copy !req
1247. Always, forever.Copy !req
1248. I guess you'll just have to fly
away with me.Copy !req
1249. I'm scared of aeroplanes.Copy !req
1250. Last time I flew to Dallas,
I got so scared,Copy !req
1251. I soiled right through
my new dress.Copy !req
1252. I can kinda fly.Copy !req
1253. Real flying.Copy !req
1254. I have wings...
like a bird.Copy !req
1255. Wings?
You're kidding.Copy !req
1256. Mm.Copy !req
1257. Uh-uh.Copy !req
1258. I've been working on them
for a long time.Copy !req
1259. They're almost finished.Copy !req
1260. You mean you've
got real wings that work?Copy !req
1261. And that you can really fly
with?Copy !req
1262. Mm-hmm.Copy !req
1263. - You're kidding.
- No.Copy !req
1264. Where are they?Copy !req
1265. Where I live in the Dome.Copy !req
1266. You live in the Astrodome?Copy !req
1267. You're kidding. Where?Copy !req
1268. In the fallout shelter.Copy !req
1269. And you've got wings
that really work?Copy !req
1270. Mm-hmm.Copy !req
1271. You're kidding.Copy !req
1272. You keep saying that. Do
you think I'd just make that up?Copy !req
1273. When can you try them out?Copy !req
1274. Tomorrow. I can fly tomorrow?Copy !req
1275. I waited up for you.Copy !req
1276. It's very late.
You should be in bed.Copy !req
1277. I'm not tired.Copy !req
1278. That girl almost got you caught.Copy !req
1279. I asked you
not to see her again.Copy !req
1280. I think I'm capable of picking
my own friends.Copy !req
1281. You only have one friend,
Brewster, me.Copy !req
1282. I'm the only one
who cares about you.Copy !req
1283. Why did you lie to me?Copy !req
1284. I never lied to you.Copy !req
1285. I'm the only one who
has never lied to you.Copy !req
1286. It's happened, hasn't it?Copy !req
1287. It's not like you would say it
would be at all, Louise.Copy !req
1288. Suzanne is nothing
like you said.Copy !req
1289. Brewster do you realize
what that means if they work?Copy !req
1290. Yeah.Copy !req
1291. We can fly away together.Copy !req
1292. "Fly away."Copy !req
1293. Brewster,
you could be a millionaire.Copy !req
1294. I've got to get you
a good lawyer to protect you.Copy !req
1295. And you'll need a patent.Copy !req
1296. Bernard'll know. Remember he's
my old boyfriend.Copy !req
1297. The one I told you about who
works for the politician.Copy !req
1298. You could get a limousine
with a chauffeur and everything.Copy !req
1299. Suzanne, you're talking crazy.Copy !req
1300. You can get a house on
River Oaks Boulevard.Copy !req
1301. Brewster, how could you?Copy !req
1302. Louise, if Suzanne upsets you
that much, maybe you better go.Copy !req
1303. You told her everything about
yourself, didn't you?Copy !req
1304. But we have to fly away.Copy !req
1305. Why? Why can't we stay here?Copy !req
1306. This is my home.Copy !req
1307. I love it here.Copy !req
1308. They'll put me in a cage.Copy !req
1309. Why?Copy !req
1310. You know all the people
who died?Copy !req
1311. You mean the ones who
were strangled?Copy !req
1312. Mm-hmm.Copy !req
1313. I'm responsible.Copy !req
1314. She's coming here, isn't she?Copy !req
1315. Don't you know what she'll do?Copy !req
1316. She'll be the death of you.Copy !req
1317. We could leave now.Copy !req
1318. We could leave now.Copy !req
1319. All right, we'll go now.Copy !req
1320. But it'll take me a
little time to get ready.Copy !req
1321. So why don't you go ahead and go to the
Dome and begin getting the wings ready.Copy !req
1322. And I'll meet you there
in the fallout shelter.Copy !req
1323. Right?Copy !req
1324. - Suzanne?
- Huh?Copy !req
1325. I love you,
and Louise was wrong.Copy !req
1326. Hello?Copy !req
1327. May I speak to Bernard?Copy !req
1328. Who?Copy !req
1329. Bernard. He's supposed
to work there.Copy !req
1330. I think he's a secretary
or something.Copy !req
1331. Just a moment.Copy !req
1332. It's for you.Copy !req
1333. Bernard, you know I
do not approveCopy !req
1334. of your taking personal phone
calls during business hours.Copy !req
1335. Well, who is it?Copy !req
1336. I hope it's an emergency.Copy !req
1337. Hello?Copy !req
1338. Bernard, it's me, Suzanne.Copy !req
1339. Suzanne, Mr. Weeks doesn't like me
getting personal calls at work.Copy !req
1340. But it's an emergency.Copy !req
1341. It's an emergency.Copy !req
1342. I've been dating this
really weird boy.Copy !req
1343. His name is Brewster...Copy !req
1344. Brewster McCloud.Copy !req
1345. Bernard, I think he's crazy.Copy !req
1346. He thinks he can fly,Copy !req
1347. and I think he's the one who's
been strangling all those people.Copy !req
1348. You mean you know
who the strangler is?Copy !req
1349. Give me that phone.Copy !req
1350. Young lady?Copy !req
1351. This is Haskell Weeks.Copy !req
1352. What?Copy !req
1353. Can't close this goddamned door.Copy !req
1354. And you say he says he can fly,
Miss Ferris?Copy !req
1355. Yeah, that's what he said.Copy !req
1356. He said he's got wings he
made himself.Copy !req
1357. He probably swoops down on
people and strangles them.Copy !req
1358. Mm-hmm.Copy !req
1359. It looks like he's
deranged also.Copy !req
1360. Suzanne is very gullible,
Mr. Weeks.Copy !req
1361. And yet he did confess to the
stranglings, however.Copy !req
1362. Yes! You don't know how it
scared me being here with a crazy person.Copy !req
1363. Shall I call the police,
Mr. Weeks?Copy !req
1364. No.Copy !req
1365. No, we shall...Copy !req
1366. shall not call the police.Copy !req
1367. I am going to bring in this
confessed killer myself.Copy !req
1368. When I have him safely
in my custody,Copy !req
1369. and I've had a chance to consider all
the political options of that move,Copy !req
1370. then we'll notify the police.Copy !req
1371. Are you about ready, Miss, uh...Copy !req
1372. All ready.Copy !req
1373. Hi, Bernard.Copy !req
1374. The blue footed booby will compete
for the attentions of her intendedCopy !req
1375. by goose stepping
in front of him,Copy !req
1376. raising her bright blue feet
as high as she canCopy !req
1377. and thrusting out her chest.Copy !req
1378. - Wait in the car, Bernard.
- But don't you want me to go with you?Copy !req
1379. There are times, Bernard,
when a man works best alone.Copy !req
1380. This is one of those times.Copy !req
1381. What did he mean by that?Copy !req
1382. I don't know, but it's
something worth remembering.Copy !req
1383. - Bernard, I've missed you so.
- Me, too.Copy !req
1384. Shit.Copy !req
1385. Stupid. Bernard!Copy !req
1386. I get so tired
of “Norwood! Norwood!“Copy !req
1387. - We better not.
- Yeah, what's wrong?Copy !req
1388. It's not right.Copy !req
1389. Yes, it is.Copy !req
1390. I mean, we're not married.Copy !req
1391. It's all right.Copy !req
1392. All right, I'll marry you.Copy !req
1393. When?Copy !req
1394. Today, just as soon
as Mr. Weeks gets back.Copy !req
1395. Courtship activities
have the further functionCopy !req
1396. of regulating the timing
of sex readiness,Copy !req
1397. so that the reproductive
physiology of a pairCopy !req
1398. may be synchronized.Copy !req
1399. This is particularly important
in a flying animalCopy !req
1400. which cannot afford to carry
indefinitely the extra ballastCopy !req
1401. of greatly enlarged gonads.Copy !req
1402. Take me.Copy !req
1403. Uh, maybe we'd better wait until
we're married this evening.Copy !req
1404. You're not going to
leave me like this.Copy !req
1405. Well, we better go look for Mr. Weeks.
He's been gone a long time.Copy !req
1406. Let's not be sleeping
on the job, Norwood.Copy !req
1407. It's Mr. Weeks!Copy !req
1408. Is he dead?Copy !req
1409. I don't know.Copy !req
1410. Then maybe we better find out.Copy !req
1411. Ok.Copy !req
1412. He's dead, all right.Copy !req
1413. Well, what do you
think we ought to do?Copy !req
1414. Call the police.Copy !req
1415. Good idea.Copy !req
1416. What are you doing?Copy !req
1417. I'm getting the number
of the police.Copy !req
1418. Oh, Bernard.Copy !req
1419. Bernard, everything's so awful.Copy !req
1420. Kiss me?Copy !req
1421. Man's insatiable mindCopy !req
1422. goaded on by a handicapped bodyCopy !req
1423. will undoubtedly invent
subtleties and refinementsCopy !req
1424. for his present clumsy
progress through the air.Copy !req
1425. But he will never obtain that
mastery of the airCopy !req
1426. which is the result of the
development of millions of yearsCopy !req
1427. acting on the self-contained mechanism
of a living body!Copy !req
1428. Fly! Fly! Fly!Copy !req
1429. Fly!Copy !req
1430. Ladies and gentlemen,Copy !req
1431. The Greatest Show on
Earth proudly presentsCopy !req
1432. the cast of Brewster McCloud.Copy !req
1433. Miss Sally Kellerman,Copy !req
1434. Mr. Michael Murphy,Copy !req
1435. yours truly, William Windom,Copy !req
1436. Shelley Duvall,Copy !req
1437. John Schuck...Copy !req
1438. G. Wood,Copy !req
1439. Corey Fischer,Copy !req
1440. Jennifer Salt,Copy !req
1441. Dean Goss,Copy !req
1442. Bert Remsen,Copy !req
1443. Angelin Johnson,Copy !req
1444. William Baldwin,Copy !req
1445. Rene Auberjonois,Copy !req
1446. Margaret Hamilton,Copy !req
1447. Stacy Keach...Copy !req
1448. and Mr. Bud Cort!Copy !req