1. (Man)
You can throw a fast one.Copy !req
2. how about it, kitten?Copy !req
3. What's the chance
of a bit tonight?Copy !req
4. Oh, why, yes,
of course, boys.Copy !req
5. I'll leave
the front door openCopy !req
6. and you can all troop
in and give me a jab.Copy !req
7. Not up to it, then?Copy !req
8. You innocent,
shovel-wielding,Copy !req
9. horny-handed sons
of the native sod.Copy !req
10. Not many people
are, munchkin.Copy !req
11. Not many people
can take the tale
of Patrick BradenCopy !req
12. a.K.A. Saint kitten,Copy !req
13. who strutted the catwalks,
face lit by a halo
of flashbulbsCopy !req
14. as, "oh!" She shrieked,
"I told you,
from my best side, darlings."Copy !req
15. (Patrick)
I was born, you see, munchkin,Copy !req
16. in a small town
near the Irish border.Copy !req
17. I was left in a basket
on a certain doorstepCopy !req
18. and only the Robins knew why.Copy !req
19. Oh, but then, they knew
everybody's business.Copy !req
20. Those red-breasted
busybodies.Copy !req
21. Every secret behind
every lace-curtain window.Copy !req
22. Uh-oh, behind you!Copy !req
23. This looks like trouble.Copy !req
24. Oh, dear!Copy !req
25. Let's go.Copy !req
26. Robins! Would you
believe it, father?Copy !req
27. Pecking at the cream.Copy !req
28. I suppose it's Christmas
morning, after all.Copy !req
29. Is your breakfast all right?Copy !req
30. Well, I'll get ready
for mass, so. God bless.Copy !req
31. God bless.Copy !req
32. He hasn't been
himself lately, so.Copy !req
33. No, he hasn't been
himself at all,Copy !req
34. Since the blonde
housekeeper left.Copy !req
35. The one that looked
like the film starCopy !req
36. With the
bubble-cut curls.Copy !req
37. Mitzi gaynor!Copy !req
38. Just the job.
(Woman on t.V.)
Mr. steed?Copy !req
39. Cutex coral pink.Copy !req
40. (Steed)
Yes.Copy !req
41. What a charming
atmosphere you have here.Copy !req
42. Do you mind?Copy !req
43. (Woman)
Not at all.Copy !req
44. Thank you.Copy !req
45. Ooh, will you
have a love seat?Copy !req
46. The love seat? Why not?Copy !req
47. Mr. lovejoy will
see you in a moment.Copy !req
48. He's just congratulating
one of our happy couples.Copy !req
49. How very encouraging.
Yes.Copy !req
50. Uh, perhaps you'd like
a glass of champers?Copy !req
51. Champers? Now you're talking.Copy !req
52. Or, a piece of
wedding cake?Copy !req
53. No, thank you.
I've just had breakfast.Copy !req
54. (Man)
Mr. steed?Copy !req
55. My good shoes!
My good shoes,
you little brat!Copy !req
56. (Caroline)
Do it harder, mammy.Copy !req
57. Teach him not to
wear my dress again.Copy !req
58. He'll make a disgrace of us?
Well, you'll not!Copy !req
59. Do you really have to?Copy !req
60. I'll march you
up and down the streetCopy !req
61. and disgrace you
in front of the whole town.Copy !req
62. Promise?Copy !req
63. Hit him with it, ma!
Give him the brush again!Copy !req
64. Say, "I am not a girl."
I'm not a girl.Copy !req
65. "I am a boy.
I'm not a girl."Copy !req
66. I'm a boy, not a girl.Copy !req
67. Say it right.Copy !req
68. Make him
say it right, ma.Copy !req
69. My heart broke
from the cursed day
I ever took you in.Copy !req
70. (Commentator on t.V.)
A short one by gareth Carey,Copy !req
71. up along the far wing
to Tony haddon.Copy !req
72. Tony haddon,
40 yards out now, from the...Copy !req
73. Off he goes then,
the ball across him
towards the center.Copy !req
74. And coming, Alfred Whitney.
He's capped there.Copy !req
75. Well down over his eyes
is, uh, Nick Brady.Copy !req
76. The ball comes over.
Who's got it? Reid Morgan.Copy !req
77. Reid Morgan
gets the 35-yard...Copy !req
78. Brother barnabas
says he'll try you
on the football teamCopy !req
79. and I want you
to read this.Copy !req
80. Heading high and to the right,
and yes, it is...Copy !req
81. It's gone over the bar
for the first
goal of the game.Copy !req
82. Paddy gardy.Copy !req
83. The first goal of the game.Copy !req
84. Paddy gardy took one
from this side.Copy !req
85. It had a curl on it,
and one had to waitCopy !req
86. until the umpires
gave their decisionCopy !req
87. as to whether it
was in or not. It was.Copy !req
88. And I call my mother names.Copy !req
89. (Liam)
Well, you know,Copy !req
90. you—you—you
shouldn't do that, my son.Copy !req
91. What do you call her?Copy !req
92. Hairy arse.Copy !req
93. Hairy arse and bockedy hole.Copy !req
94. And cunthooks.Copy !req
95. Stay where you are!
You must not proceed.Copy !req
96. Jesus!Copy !req
97. You must not curse.Copy !req
98. If you curse,
you'll be exterminated.Copy !req
99. Holy fuck!Copy !req
100. You've been warned,
earthling.Copy !req
101. Now you must die!Copy !req
102. No, dalek, please.Copy !req
103. Sausages, sausages,
stay where you are.Copy !req
104. Yes, yes, of course!
Please don't shoot!Copy !req
105. (Charlie)
Lawrence, come on.Copy !req
106. Not now,
I'm busy. I'm busy.Copy !req
107. Come on.Copy !req
108. I'm busy.Copy !req
109. Oh, figgly boogles, I'm dead.Copy !req
110. (Patrick)
Die for Ireland?Copy !req
111. I'm sorry,
but it appeared to meCopy !req
112. that someone here
had taken leave
of their senses.Copy !req
113. (Irwin)
Are you playing the game
or not, Braden?Copy !req
114. Me play!
Dying for Ireland.Copy !req
115. Earthling,
stay where you are!Copy !req
116. Well, come on,
englishman, a bullet, please.Copy !req
117. And next up is
the dashing feelyCopy !req
118. sporting a smoking jacket,
fedora hat, and sunglasses
by Gucci.Copy !req
119. Madam.Copy !req
120. The man himself.Copy !req
121. Your mother will
be back in a while.Copy !req
122. Oh.Copy !req
123. So how's Patrick
and the Braden household?Copy !req
124. They're well, Mr. feely.Copy !req
125. Especially my mother,
wherever she is.Copy !req
126. So someone's told
you something, Patrick?Copy !req
127. They don't have to.Copy !req
128. Hairy arse Braden
tells me every day.Copy !req
129. Ah, Patrick, now...Copy !req
130. I'm sorry, Mr. feely.Copy !req
131. You know, I saw her once,
your real mother,Copy !req
132. long after the day she left.Copy !req
133. It was in London.Copy !req
134. I was doing work
for genie mcquillan.Copy !req
135. I was going home
through piccadillyCopy !req
136. and there,
passing by, was eily bergin.Copy !req
137. (Benny)
Lovely as the day she left,
I swear it to God.Copy !req
138. (Patrick)
Did you talk to her,
Mr. feely?Copy !req
139. What did she say?Copy !req
140. I shouted after her, Patrick,
but she didn't hear.Copy !req
141. London swallowed her up.Copy !req
142. The most beautiful
girl in the town.Copy !req
143. Biggest city in the world...Copy !req
144. It swallowed my mother up.Copy !req
145. What about my father,
Mr. feely?Copy !req
146. I wouldn't know
about that, son.Copy !req
147. Things be complicated,
you know.Copy !req
148. What did she look like?Copy !req
149. Mitzi gaynor, son.Copy !req
150. That's who she
looked like, mitzi.Copy !req
151. Mitzi gaynor.Copy !req
152. Well, fuck me pink
with a hairy arse!Copy !req
153. In the name of
the father and the son
and the holy spirit, amen.Copy !req
154. You see, once upon a time,Copy !req
155. there was a young girl
named eily berginCopy !req
156. who looked not unlike
the well-known
film star mitzi gaynorCopy !req
157. who sang I'm gonna wash
that man right outta my hair.Copy !req
158. And she went to London,
the biggest city in the world,Copy !req
159. which swallowed her up.Copy !req
160. But before she vanished,Copy !req
161. I think she
worked as a priest's
housekeeper, father.Copy !req
162. But I could be
wrong there, couldn't I?Copy !req
163. I mean, I could be wrong.
After all, I...Copy !req
164. All I wanted was her address.Copy !req
165. (Mr. Egan)
There between the po
and the apennines, boysCopy !req
166. the climate is
always the same.Copy !req
167. The landscape never changesCopy !req
168. and in country like this
you can stop along
any road for a momentCopy !req
169. and look at a farmhouse
sitting in the middle
of maize and hemp,Copy !req
170. and immediately
a story is born.Copy !req
171. Now, when you're writing
your essay for me
this morning,Copy !req
172. whatever form it takes
is up to you.Copy !req
173. It can be called
"I fought in
the easter rising,"Copy !req
174. "I was Dracula's girlfriend,"Copy !req
175. or even "a day in
the life of an old boot".Copy !req
176. You've got one hour,
so learn to write.Copy !req
177. "God bless us.Copy !req
178. "It's yourself..."Copy !req
179. Ah, God bless us.
It's yourself, ma'am.Copy !req
180. It is indeed, father.Copy !req
181. (Patrick)
RemarkedCopy !req
182. Randy father LiamCopy !req
183. as he opened the doorCopy !req
184. to a young womanCopy !req
185. who bore
a startling resemblanceCopy !req
186. to mitzi gaynor.Copy !req
187. So you are the replacement
for Mrs. mcglynn?Copy !req
188. (Eily)
I am indeed, father.Copy !req
189. Destroyed with
the lumbago, she is.Copy !req
190. Destroyed,
and that's a fact.Copy !req
191. But sure she'll be
back on her feet soon,
please God.Copy !req
192. Please God she will, now.Copy !req
193. But tell me this,Copy !req
194. have I begun to doteCopy !req
195. or do you remind me
of someone special?Copy !req
196. When she sensed a movementCopy !req
197. underneath his
black serge trousers.Copy !req
198. Oh, father, please,
how could I?Copy !req
199. When I've gone
out of my wayCopy !req
200. knowing that
your dicky doodle,
naughty poopster that he is,Copy !req
201. given the slightest
encouragement,Copy !req
202. would be only too eager
to get up to mischief.Copy !req
203. Down, boy! Naughty dicky.Copy !req
204. To camouflage myself
and look like any ordinary
old curate's drudge.Copy !req
205. "And most definitely notCopy !req
206. "a perfume-sprayed visionCopy !req
207. "named mitzi gaynorCopy !req
208. "with a head of
bubble-cut curlsCopy !req
209. "that would make
any man's privates
go sprong."Copy !req
210. I've got the standard
uniform, father.Copy !req
211. The blue housecoat
with the bow at the back,Copy !req
212. the tan stockings,
color of stale tea,Copy !req
213. the old hairnet,
which says to
all them mickiesCopy !req
214. whose duty it is
to stay inside
and wear black serge,Copy !req
215. "no mickies today.Copy !req
216. "Down, boys.
That's it, my sweets,Copy !req
217. "off with you and
say your prayers."Copy !req
218. Breakfast, father?Copy !req
219. By God,
and now you're talking.Copy !req
220. Mickey is deviousCopy !req
221. and no matter
how much you tell him,Copy !req
222. he simply won't stay down.Copy !req
223. But drab old housecoatsCopy !req
224. and tea-colored stockings
might well have kept him downCopy !req
225. if it wasn't for that
pesky spot of grease.Copy !req
226. Oh, this is
powerful altogether.Copy !req
227. I would do jail
for another rasher.Copy !req
228. Do you know that, eily?Copy !req
229. I'll fry you some more
this minute, then, father.Copy !req
230. Come here, little eily.
Did you hear the oneCopy !req
231. about peanuts
at confession?Copy !req
232. No, father.
At least I don't think so.Copy !req
233. Says the priest
to the young fellow,Copy !req
234. "did you throw peanuts
in the river, too?"Copy !req
235. To which the young lad says,
"no, father, I am peanuts."Copy !req
236. (Patrick)
Not a very funny joke,Copy !req
237. but she laughed
and she laughed.Copy !req
238. In fact, you could say
she laughed until she cried.Copy !req
239. Oops!Copy !req
240. My skirt and housecoat
are riding up.Copy !req
241. Better abort
this task at onceCopy !req
242. or we could have
an exploding clergymanCopy !req
243. filling the air with
pent-up sexual energy.Copy !req
244. Oh, no!
Priest grows wings
in latest miracle.Copy !req
245. Eily!Copy !req
246. "When she found
herself enveloped
by his skirts."Copy !req
247. Now, father,
is this another joke?Copy !req
248. Ow!Copy !req
249. That hurt, father.Copy !req
250. Frank Sinatra
wouldn't do this, father.Copy !req
251. Neither would Vic damone.Copy !req
252. I'm all wet, father.Copy !req
253. What are you doing
down there, father?Copy !req
254. Are you playing squidgy
with my fairy liquid?Copy !req
255. But she was soon to realizeCopy !req
256. it wasn't fairy liquid
he'd been playing with
down there.Copy !req
257. The end.Copy !req
258. No,Copy !req
259. it wasn't
fairy liquid at all.Copy !req
260. "... privates go sprong."Copy !req
261. "Privates go...Copy !req
262. How dare you?Copy !req
263. When I said, "develop
your literary skills,"Copy !req
264. I did not, repeat,
not, mean this.Copy !req
265. Why did you write it?Copy !req
266. I thought there
was a moral, sir.Copy !req
267. A lesson, if you will.Copy !req
268. Young girls
in mortal danger.Copy !req
269. Get out of
this classroom, Braden!Copy !req
270. To the Dean's office!Copy !req
271. Hello, class.
My name is miss kittenCopy !req
272. and I'd like to tell
you about the perilsCopy !req
273. of being
a priest's housekeeper,Copy !req
274. especially when you look
like mitzi gaynor.Copy !req
275. Hands up who can tell me
who mitzi gaynor is.Copy !req
276. So, you see, Patrick,
we're on your side.Copy !req
277. We're here to help you.Copy !req
278. I don't think
you understand that.Copy !req
279. Well, no,
you're wrong, father. I do.Copy !req
280. So, if you can think of
anything that would help us
to help you, well...Copy !req
281. Well,Copy !req
282. there is one thing, father.Copy !req
283. Instead of p.E...Copy !req
284. Yeah.Copy !req
285. I could take
home economics
and needlework class.Copy !req
286. And you think
that would help you, uh,Copy !req
287. knuckle down
and apply yourself?Copy !req
288. What's that, Patrick?Copy !req
289. Oh, and you can
call me kitten, father.Copy !req
290. Kitten?Copy !req
291. Yes, Patrick kitten Braden,
after Saint kitten.Copy !req
292. Well, now, there was
no Saint kitten, Patrick.Copy !req
293. Oh, no, but there was
a Saint cettin, father,Copy !req
294. and some have been
known to call him,Copy !req
295. or was it a her,Copy !req
296. kitten.Copy !req
297. Saint kitten?Copy !req
298. Mm-hmm.Copy !req
299. He or she was an acolyte
of Saint Patrick.Copy !req
300. Wore a dress. As did
Saint Patrick, actually.Copy !req
301. A hairy dress.Copy !req
302. Quite ruined
her complexion.Copy !req
303. And they're for
your sister, Patrick?Copy !req
304. Mm-hmm.Copy !req
305. Oh, she really
needs a bit of glamour
in her life, Mrs. coyle.Copy !req
306. But then again, don't we all?Copy !req
307. (Reporter on t.V.)
The trouble broke outCopy !req
308. as the minister of state
for northern Ireland,
Mr. channon,Copy !req
309. was visiting derry
to see businessmen thereCopy !req
310. for the second time
inside a month.Copy !req
311. Jesus, mammy, I'm exhausted.Copy !req
312. At least you
have a jobCopy !req
313. which is more than
that waster yonder
is ever likely to have.Copy !req
314. Now, one more complaint
from that schoolCopy !req
315. and it'll not be good for you,
by Christ, it'll not.Copy !req
316. Oh, mammy?Copy !req
317. Do you have
the price of the dance
and a cup of coffee?Copy !req
318. Price of the dance
and a cup of coffee?Copy !req
319. Price of the dance
and a cup of coffee?Copy !req
320. Well, do you think
I'm made of money?Copy !req
321. Do you think
I'm made of money, eh?Copy !req
322. Eh, eh.Copy !req
323. Will you just
hand over the cash?Copy !req
324. Will you just
fork out the moneyCopy !req
325. and stop blathering,
you fucking
whiskery old whore.Copy !req
326. Here. And don't
ask me again.Copy !req
327. Well, thank you
so much, mammy.Copy !req
328. Thank you so much.Copy !req
329. no. No, no,
no, no, no.Copy !req
330. Why not?Copy !req
331. I'm not obliged to
give you any reasons,
but I'll give you 2 anyway.Copy !req
332. Him and her.Copy !req
333. Don't have to stand
for this, do we, paddy?Copy !req
334. Oh, paddy's her name.
Well, that's reason number 3.Copy !req
335. Did you ever
ride a man, lukie?Copy !req
336. No, but I rode
a man that did.Copy !req
337. (Irwin)
Fuck you.Copy !req
338. Evening.Copy !req
339. How you doing?Copy !req
340. Mikey, go get the lads.Copy !req
341. (Bouncer)
I'm warning you,
get out of here!Copy !req
342. fuck them
and their rob strong.Copy !req
343. We'll go to the Glen.Copy !req
344. Excuse me.
Can we have a lift?Copy !req
345. Get on.Copy !req
346. Moving out.Copy !req
347. (biker #1)
Druids, man.
We're like the border knights.Copy !req
348. Knew all about
the space-time continuum.Copy !req
349. No, Lawrence!
No. Excu—excuse me, please.Copy !req
350. Open his eyes.Copy !req
351. What do you see, bro?
Sausages.Copy !req
352. No stars?Copy !req
353. Stars and sausages.Copy !req
354. (Biker #1)
Now you're talking.Copy !req
355. Gotta get
behind the surface.Copy !req
356. Yes, surface.Copy !req
357. I see 4 green fields,
brits in one of them.Copy !req
358. Not for fucking long.Copy !req
359. Hey, no politics, man.Copy !req
360. Border knights
don't allow them.Copy !req
361. Jams the astral highway.Copy !req
362. So why do you call yourselves
the border knights?Copy !req
363. Because the only
border that mattersCopy !req
364. is the one between
what's in frontCopy !req
365. and what
you've left behind.Copy !req
366. When I ride my hog,
you think I'm riding
the road?Copy !req
367. No way, man.Copy !req
368. I'm traveling from
the past into the future
with a druid at my back.Copy !req
369. Druid man or druid woman?Copy !req
370. That doesn't matter.Copy !req
371. What matters is the journey.Copy !req
372. You know where
it goes, baby?Copy !req
373. Where?Copy !req
374. pluto?Copy !req
375. Pluto.Copy !req
376. No, not pluto the dog.
Pluto the planet.Copy !req
377. Named by percival lowell
and William h. Pickering,Copy !req
378. after the invisible
king of the underworld.Copy !req
379. you think about that.Copy !req
380. oh, kiss me,
Joseph.Copy !req
381. Kiss me,
Joseph hanratty.Copy !req
382. I'll beat your fucking...Copy !req
383. (Dean)
Now, boys and girls,Copy !req
384. a retreat is time for
prayer and reflection.Copy !req
385. Some of you may
have already noticed
that your bodies areCopy !req
386. going through some changesCopy !req
387. and I would like
you to feel free
to approach usCopy !req
388. about any problem
that concerns you.Copy !req
389. So, I will leave
this problem boxCopy !req
390. here by the altar rails.Copy !req
391. No problem
should be precluded.Copy !req
392. After all,
that is why we are here.Copy !req
393. now, does everyone remember
last week
we were talking about...Copy !req
394. you'll not bring my
retreat into disrepute,
do you hear me?Copy !req
395. How dare it.
How dare you, you pup you...Copy !req
396. Sir, you're hurting me.Copy !req
397. What did you write
on the paper, Patrick?Copy !req
398. Nothing.Copy !req
399. Nothing.Copy !req
400. Just, did he know any place
that does a good sex change?Copy !req
401. Disgraced!Copy !req
402. Disgraced in front
of the whole town,
so we are! Oh, Jesus!Copy !req
403. (Caroline)
How could you do it, paddy?Copy !req
404. Mammy has a bad heart!Copy !req
405. And now you've broken it.Copy !req
406. (Ma Braden)
Oh, God, oh, God!Copy !req
407. Oh, Jesus Christ. My arm!Copy !req
408. She's not my mammy.Copy !req
409. What did you say?Copy !req
410. I'm sorry, caz.Copy !req
411. Sorry, mammy,
wherever you are.Copy !req
412. Oh, stop it,
Patrick, please!Copy !req
413. Why won't you stop it
and let us get on
with our lives?Copy !req
414. I'm sorry, caz.
I never meant to hurt you.Copy !req
415. After all, we've
both been through this—Copy !req
416. get away!Copy !req
417. Get your hands off me,
you creature!Copy !req
418. Oh, figgly boogles.
What's the point?Copy !req
419. That's it,
I've tried my best. I'm off.Copy !req
420. are you going to scotsfield,
by any chance?Copy !req
421. We'd better be.
We're playing there tonight.
Get in the back.Copy !req
422. hello.Copy !req
423. (Billy)
What do you think of
this trouble up north?Copy !req
424. Oh, I think it's
an absolute terror.Copy !req
425. Do you think so, yeah?Copy !req
426. (Patrick)
Oh, I do it.Copy !req
427. A terror to the
living world, so it is.Copy !req
428. I don't think
you care either way,Copy !req
429. my good-looking
young friend.Copy !req
430. No, I know how serious it is.Copy !req
431. They think they can
break us, don't they?Copy !req
432. Hang paddy
from the ceiling.Copy !req
433. Fuck him
from a helicopter.Copy !req
434. Give him a dose
of white noise.Copy !req
435. Shove electrodes up his arse.Copy !req
436. Now, really, Mr.--Copy !req
437. hatchett.
They call me Billy hatchett.Copy !req
438. Pleased to meet you,
Mr. hatchett.Copy !req
439. You really don't
know who I am, do you?Copy !req
440. I haven't had
the pleasure.Copy !req
441. Do you hear that, lads?Copy !req
442. He's never heard
of Billy hatchett
and the mohawks.Copy !req
443. (Billy)
So, have you somewhere
to stay tonight, paddy?Copy !req
444. Or should I call you Patrick?Copy !req
445. (Patrick)
You can call me
kitten, darling.Copy !req
446. Kitten?Copy !req
447. Mmm-hmm.Copy !req
448. After Saint cettin.Copy !req
449. He or she was an acolyte
of Patrick, Saint Patrick.Copy !req
450. So you have somewhere
to stay, then?Copy !req
451. Mammy threw me out,
I'm afraid.Copy !req
452. Well, I could always,
uh, put you up in the van.Copy !req
453. It's not much, but I could.Copy !req
454. Mr. hatchett!Copy !req
455. Thank you.Copy !req
456. You're welcome, kitten.Copy !req
457. I'll be off to the hotel,
then, kitten.Copy !req
458. I'd stay the night.Copy !req
459. I'd stay the night,
but the boys...Copy !req
460. The boys might
get the wrong idea.Copy !req
461. No, I've gotta go.
I've gotta go.Copy !req
462. Oh, please don't go just yet.Copy !req
463. Oh, kitten.
I gotta go. I really have.Copy !req
464. Billy! Billy, Billy.Copy !req
465. it's Bobby goldsboro.Copy !req
466. used to help me
get to sleep.Copy !req
467. His wife dies.
You see, she dies
when he's away from home.Copy !req
468. Oh, kitten,
I've gotta go now.Copy !req
469. Billy.
I really have.Copy !req
470. if you were
away with the bandCopy !req
471. and you came home
and you found me lying there,Copy !req
472. like Bobby's wife...Copy !req
473. what about it?Copy !req
474. what?
Would you take me
to the hospital?Copy !req
475. Oh, of course I would.Copy !req
476. Of course I would, kitten.Copy !req
477. Oh, I wish
that could happen.Copy !req
478. (Running bear)
I've seen it all now.Copy !req
479. I tell you,
I've fucking well
seen it all now.Copy !req
480. Where the fuck
do you think
he disappeared toCopy !req
481. when we were
in San Francisco?Copy !req
482. I'd even bring you flowers.Copy !req
483. roses?Copy !req
484. Roses.Copy !req
485. Oh, Billy.Copy !req
486. Oh, kitten.Copy !req
487. Billy.Copy !req
488. for I ask you,
Billy Bobby, nicest man,Copy !req
489. what's an Indian
band without a squaw?Copy !req
490. "A squaw?"Copy !req
491. name, please?Copy !req
492. Paddy kitten.
What's yours, darling?Copy !req
493. I could tell you
were a paddy all right.Copy !req
494. What about Geronimo?Copy !req
495. What would I know?
I'm just a Mick.Copy !req
496. 13 of your lot
shot in derry.Copy !req
497. What do you
know about that?Copy !req
498. Maybe you'd know about
13 less to deal with.Copy !req
499. Fuck off, mate.Copy !req
500. (Billy)
Fuck off.Copy !req
501. get off the fucking stage,
you stupid bitch.Copy !req
502. (Billy)
Patrick, I, I—I don't know
how to say this to you.Copy !req
503. It's—it's the boys,
the boys in the band.Copy !req
504. They feel a squaw
just isn't working out.Copy !req
505. (Patrick)
It could be
they have a point.Copy !req
506. They say it
doesn't feel right.Copy !req
507. I don't know,
they've been
with me so long and...Copy !req
508. I'm sorry.Copy !req
509. But I have
a little proposal.Copy !req
510. A ring, perhaps?Copy !req
511. Oh, Patrick, Patrick...Copy !req
512. Shh.Copy !req
513. Shh.Copy !req
514. I told you not
to call me that.Copy !req
515. I'm sorry, kitten.Copy !req
516. Bobby Billy,
would you bring
me sweeties, too?Copy !req
517. You know I would.Copy !req
518. (Patrick)
What kind
would they be?Copy !req
519. Oh, for the love of Jesus.Copy !req
520. (Patrick)
No. No, quality street.Copy !req
521. (Billy)
Quality street?Copy !req
522. it was my mother's.Copy !req
523. She left it to me
in her will.Copy !req
524. Nobody stays here,
and I—I need somebody
to look after it, kitten.Copy !req
525. What do you reckon?Copy !req
526. House of dreams and longing.Copy !req
527. I wouldn't exactly
call it a house,
but tell us what you think.Copy !req
528. oh, to have a little house.Copy !req
529. To own the hearth,
stool and all.Copy !req
530. So, kitten, can I
come and visit you
every now and again?Copy !req
531. Of course you can,
you great, big, silly
Bobby goldsboro.Copy !req
532. You don't even
have to ask.Copy !req
533. well, goodness gracious,
icky-oakie me.Copy !req
534. what?Copy !req
535. What's with Diana Ross?Copy !req
536. Leave him be,
he knows nothing.Copy !req
537. Keep it that way.Copy !req
538. No problem.Copy !req
539. if I volunteer, irwin,
could I have pink glasses,
please?Copy !req
540. Can't you take
anything serious?Copy !req
541. Oh, serious,
serious, serious.Copy !req
542. You might have to
soon enough.Copy !req
543. So fucking what, Charlie?Copy !req
544. I sell republican news.
A few fucking papers,
big deal.Copy !req
545. What are you,
my fucking wife?Copy !req
546. Don't you lie to me, irwin.Copy !req
547. I don't believe your stories.Copy !req
548. I'm involved in nothing!
I sell their paper,Copy !req
549. for all the difference
it makes in this kip.Copy !req
550. Nobody gives a fuck!Copy !req
551. Soon enough
they fucking will.Copy !req
552. If I find out
you're lying to me,Copy !req
553. I'll finish
with you, I swear!Copy !req
554. Yeah, well, finish it with me,
see if I fucking care!Copy !req
555. (Officer #1)
Come on, move off the road.Copy !req
556. There's a vehicle
coming through.Copy !req
557. Get back.
It's for your own safety.Copy !req
558. (Officer #2)
Get these people
off the street!Copy !req
559. I want everyone to move away
from the red van!Copy !req
560. Come on, folks.
Stand back, please. Move!Copy !req
561. (Guard)
Bring it down careful now.
Yeah, gently.Copy !req
562. Please, move back.Copy !req
563. Move back.Copy !req
564. (Officer #2)
Now let the army go to work.Copy !req
565. Get back, now, get back.Copy !req
566. (Officer #1)
Move back
and clear the area.Copy !req
567. There may be
other devices.Copy !req
568. (Officer #2)
You're to get away now.
Get back, now.Copy !req
569. Get away from the street.Copy !req
570. Get off the street now.Copy !req
571. (Officer #1)
Clear this area
for your own safety.Copy !req
572. Move back.Copy !req
573. It's a dalek. Exterminate.Copy !req
574. Lawrence!Copy !req
575. Exterminate. Exterminate.Copy !req
576. Exterminate. Exterminate.Copy !req
577. (Lawrence)
Exterminate.Copy !req
578. (Liam)
Dust thou art, and unto
dust thou shalt return...Copy !req
579. Until the lord raises
you up on the last day.Copy !req
580. Let us pray for
our brother Lawrence
to our lord Jesus ChristCopy !req
581. who said,
"I am the resurrection,
and the life.Copy !req
582. "The man who believes in me
will live even if he dies."Copy !req
583. Our father,
who art in heaven,
hallowed be thy name.Copy !req
584. Thy kingdom comeCopy !req
585. thy will be done on earth,
as it is in heaven.Copy !req
586. Give us this day
our daily bread...Copy !req
587. Serious, serious.Copy !req
588. Time for some
serious spring cleaning.Copy !req
589. Fuck.Copy !req
590. Don't you know
what this means?Copy !req
591. Do—do—do you know
what these guys
are like, paddy?Copy !req
592. Don't let this come
between us, Billy.Copy !req
593. Shut up!Copy !req
594. Jesus, what the fuck
am I gonna do?Copy !req
595. Fucking Jesus!Copy !req
596. Tell them I was
spring cleaning, darling.Copy !req
597. Where are they, paddy?Copy !req
598. Tell me, where are they?Copy !req
599. Now, what is this
you mean, my darling?Copy !req
600. The guns,
you little fucking whore,
where are they?Copy !req
601. The guns!
It's all too fucking serious!
Don't go fucking me around.Copy !req
602. Oh, all of a sudden
everybody's getting serious.Copy !req
603. Serious, serious, serious.Copy !req
604. I'm not fucking joking,
Patrick!Copy !req
605. Where are they?Copy !req
606. I told you to call me kitten.Copy !req
607. Don't fucking know me.Copy !req
608. You don't know
where I've gone.Copy !req
609. And if they come,
if they fucking come,
you tell them nothing.Copy !req
610. I mean nothing.Copy !req
611. Whatever you say, darling.Copy !req
612. You're way out of
your league, Patrick.Copy !req
613. You don't know what
you're dealing with.Copy !req
614. Don't fucking know.Copy !req
615. Oh, I do.
I know, all right.Copy !req
616. I know you were only joking
about the rosesCopy !req
617. and sweets, too, probably.Copy !req
618. But it was nice
while it lasted.Copy !req
619. (Charlie)
Are you happy now?Copy !req
620. Are you happy now
that you got what you wanted?Copy !req
621. Now that they've
bombed down here?Copy !req
622. Are your republican friends
good and happyCopy !req
623. now they can see
what they've done?Copy !req
624. What the fuck
are you talkin' about?Copy !req
625. It had nothing to
do with Republicans.Copy !req
626. What the fuck would they bomb
a Southern town for, huh?Copy !req
627. You hear me, Charlie?Copy !req
628. And if you want out,
just say so.Copy !req
629. (Horse)
Open the door.Copy !req
630. I can't, go away.
Come back in the morning.Copy !req
631. (Jackie)
Open it, bitch!
This is serious!Copy !req
632. Open the fucking door!Copy !req
633. Ok, okay, okay, okay, okay.
I'm coming.Copy !req
634. (Jackie)
Where did he put them?Copy !req
635. (Patrick)
I'm afraid I don't understand.Copy !req
636. The guns, Nancy boy.
Where did he put the guns?Copy !req
637. Oh, yes, the guns.Copy !req
638. Oh, Billy buried them outside
just—just to be safe.Copy !req
639. Go.Copy !req
640. There's no
fucking guns down here.Copy !req
641. Oh! I think
they might just be...Copy !req
642. The little cunt!
He's taking
the hand out of us.Copy !req
643. over here.Copy !req
644. I'll nut him!
I swear to God I'll nut him!Copy !req
645. Say goodbye
to my friends, will you?Copy !req
646. Charlie lives in
sunbeam heights
and irwin's up the backs.Copy !req
647. Irwin who?Copy !req
648. Why, irwin kerr,
of course.Copy !req
649. The big-time volunteer.Copy !req
650. How do you know irwin kerr?Copy !req
651. Oh, nothing. Never mind.Copy !req
652. Well, come on then.Copy !req
653. Just do it.
I've nothing left to live forCopy !req
654. in this stupid,
serious world.Copy !req
655. Oh, fuck him.Copy !req
656. Leave him be.
He's not worth the bullet,
the mental Nancy boy.Copy !req
657. Oh, what is it
with Nancy boysCopy !req
658. that you can't be
bothered killing them?Copy !req
659. You kill everyone else.Copy !req
660. Look, I'm fucking
warning you.Copy !req
661. Do you know what
you're doing here?Copy !req
662. Are you on dope or what?Copy !req
663. Wish that I was,
Mr. killing man.
Why, do you have any?Copy !req
664. You're way out of
your league, sunshine.Copy !req
665. Not that again.
"Out of your league,
out of your league."Copy !req
666. "Oh,
you're in over your head.
You're in over your head."Copy !req
667. Oh, for heaven's sake!Copy !req
668. Surely you've one bullet
to spare between yous.Copy !req
669. Ah, bollocks!Copy !req
670. Where are we going?Copy !req
671. You hit us, we hit you.
It's simple.Copy !req
672. (Jackie)
Right.Copy !req
673. (Horse)
The bomb was made up here
and driven across the border.Copy !req
674. (Jackie)
Wee Bobby Anderson.
Likes killing catholics.Copy !req
675. It'll be the last
fucking bomb he'll make.Copy !req
676. Turn the lights off.
Keep it running.Copy !req
677. Oh, lord.Copy !req
678. Get us the fuck
out of here, will you?Copy !req
679. What's the smell?Copy !req
680. He shat himself.
You not toilet trained?Copy !req
681. What do you
think you are, kerr?Copy !req
682. What the fuck
do you think this is?Copy !req
683. (Charlie)
Tell me
you're not serious.Copy !req
684. You see,
there's that word again.Copy !req
685. It's everywhere.Copy !req
686. But you don't know a soul
in London, paddy.Copy !req
687. There's only one soul
I need, Charlie.Copy !req
688. (Charlie)
You really think
you'll find her?Copy !req
689. How many eily bergins
can there be?Copy !req
690. (Irwin)
Maybe she's changed her name.Copy !req
691. (Patrick)
She won't have
changed her eyes, irwin.Copy !req
692. How will you get by?Copy !req
693. Saint Anthony
will guide me.Copy !req
694. the thing is,
you come to the city
that never sleepsCopy !req
695. and you think it's
open all the time,
but it does sleep.Copy !req
696. Excuse me?Copy !req
697. Of course it does.Copy !req
698. Uh, I'm looking for
my mother, please.Copy !req
699. Eily bergin.
Uh, phantom lady.Copy !req
700. I've just got 2
bergins for 1956.Copy !req
701. Bergin, Ellen,
and bergin with
a simple initial e.Copy !req
702. Well, that's her.
I mean, it has to be
one of them.Copy !req
703. One's from aldgate
and the other's
from east London.Copy !req
704. Will you be going back home
after you've found her?Copy !req
705. Oh, yes, of course.Copy !req
706. Maybe she'll come with me.Copy !req
707. And, son, will you
promise me something?Copy !req
708. Yes.Copy !req
709. Take care of yourself.Copy !req
710. Oh, I will, Mrs. Henderson.Copy !req
711. Thank you.Copy !req
712. no, mate, they knocked
those houses down years ago.Copy !req
713. I'm...Copy !req
714. (John Joe)
The man himself.Copy !req
715. About time, too.Copy !req
716. Are you here
for the job, kid?Copy !req
717. What job?Copy !req
718. This is showbiz, kid.
You gotta be on the ball.Copy !req
719. You try that with stephenson,
now, you've no fucking chance.Copy !req
720. Who's stephenson?Copy !req
721. He thinks he's in charge.Copy !req
722. R.A.F., my bollocks!
I'll give him r.A.F.Copy !req
723. You're Irish, you are.Copy !req
724. Tyreelin, county cavan.Copy !req
725. Well then, county cavan,Copy !req
726. give us a song
and you're home and dry.Copy !req
727. good man, you have it.Copy !req
728. Now the dance, ok? Ok?Copy !req
729. I'm going in.Copy !req
730. (John Joe)
Right. Hop, 1. Hop, 2.Copy !req
731. Hop, 1, 2, 3.Copy !req
732. Toosh, toosh, toosh.Copy !req
733. Flap, flap, flap. Ok?
Go, go on.Copy !req
734. Hop, hop 1,
hop 2, hop 1, 2, 3.Copy !req
735. Toosh, toosh, toosh.Copy !req
736. Flap, flap, flap.
Right, ready?Copy !req
737. Right, hop 1, hop 2.Copy !req
738. For fuck's sake,
will you hop right?Copy !req
739. 1, 2, 3.Copy !req
740. (Both)
Hop 1, hop 2.
Hop, 1, 2, 3.Copy !req
741. (Both)
Toosh, toosh, toosh.Copy !req
742. Flap, flap.
Flap it out, flap it out.Copy !req
743. Sell it to me.Copy !req
744. give him the drill, Bulgaria.Copy !req
745. Enough already.Copy !req
746. You take the croquet.
Capisce?Copy !req
747. Capisce.
I gotta wheel.Copy !req
748. Every morning,
9:00, be there.Copy !req
749. (stephenson)
Bulgaria?Copy !req
750. I told you before,
these are your responsibility.Copy !req
751. You're head womble here.Copy !req
752. Well, that's this...
Fuck! Fuck!Copy !req
753. I'll give you r.A.F.Copy !req
754. I broke no fucking mallet!
I broke no fucking mallet!Copy !req
755. (Stephenson)
Keep away from me.Copy !req
756. (Stephenson)
Put that down!Copy !req
757. (John Joe)
I'll break it across
your back, you bollocks!Copy !req
758. I'll bust it...Copy !req
759. "You broke the mallet,"
he says.Copy !req
760. "I'll have to dock
it from your pay."
I broke no fucking mallet.Copy !req
761. You fucked me
one last time.Copy !req
762. R.A.F., my bollocks!
That's the end of the line!Copy !req
763. Enough of that, John Joe.Copy !req
764. Back off, motherfucker.Copy !req
765. You don't know
what you're
dealing with here!Copy !req
766. Back in the can,
you wanna know
what they used to say?Copy !req
767. "Stay away, man.
He's out where
the buses don't run!"Copy !req
768. You're out of your
league here, friend.Copy !req
769. Oh, not that again.Copy !req
770. You have to show them
where you stand.Copy !req
771. They fuck with you,
you fuck with them.Copy !req
772. You fuck them so bad
you make them wish
they'd never been born.Copy !req
773. You want another shot?Copy !req
774. I'd love a babycham.Copy !req
775. You got it, kemo sabe.Copy !req
776. Tommy,
one babycham, one powers.Copy !req
777. Please.Copy !req
778. 2 weeks' severance,
in the paw.Copy !req
779. You fuck with John Joe Kenny,
that's one time
you fuck too many.Copy !req
780. Capisce, compadre?Copy !req
781. He's from cavan.Copy !req
782. So, where's cavan?Copy !req
783. Next to monaghan.Copy !req
784. I'm going for a womble.Copy !req
785. If you want to come,
give us a shout, right?Copy !req
786. Really, Uncle Bulgaria.Copy !req
787. I was a womble one time.
Did you know that?Copy !req
788. Hey, you can't
sleep here, love.Copy !req
789. Have you got
a home to go to?Copy !req
790. You can get
a cab outside.Copy !req
791. Oh, I do believe
I have a small, elfin
dwelling on wimbledon common.Copy !req
792. Oi!Copy !req
793. You doing business,
do it somewhere else, love.Copy !req
794. This pavement's
got my name on it.Copy !req
795. What, pray,
is your name? "Concrete"?Copy !req
796. My name is
"scratch your eyes out,"
"bite your bleeding nose off,"Copy !req
797. which is what I'll do
if you don't get off my patch.Copy !req
798. All right, lover?Copy !req
799. She giving you trouble, son?Copy !req
800. Oh, no trouble at all.
We were just exchanging names.Copy !req
801. (Hooker)
Go on, you fucking Nancy boy!Copy !req
802. Don't fucking come back!Copy !req
803. (Patrick)
And her name is
"scratch your eyes outCopy !req
804. and bite your
bleeding nose off."Copy !req
805. And my name is
Patricia kitten Braden.Copy !req
806. Pleased to meet you,
Patricia kitten Braden.Copy !req
807. Just what were you
doing back there?Copy !req
808. I was looking for
the phantom lady.Copy !req
809. You found
the right street, then.Copy !req
810. Why, what's it called?
Phantom lady street?Copy !req
811. You could call it that.Copy !req
812. And just who is
this phantom lady?Copy !req
813. Well, it's my mother, really.
I call her that.Copy !req
814. To pretend it's a story
that's happening to
someone else, you see.Copy !req
815. And why do you
pretend that?Copy !req
816. Because otherwise I might cry
and never stop.Copy !req
817. If you cried,
I'd make you stop.Copy !req
818. Oh, you would?Copy !req
819. Oh, how kind, kind sir.Copy !req
820. Yes, I'd definitely
make you stop.Copy !req
821. (Mr. Silky string)
And just what is it
you do, then?Copy !req
822. (Patrick)
Oh, this and that.
Showbiz, kind of. Singing.Copy !req
823. What do you
like to sing about?Copy !req
824. I sing about true love.Copy !req
825. That's nice.Copy !req
826. Have you ever found it?Copy !req
827. I thought I had, once.Copy !req
828. Here's one
about true love.Copy !req
829. ever heard this one?Copy !req
830. nice, isn't it?Copy !req
831. I just love love songs.Copy !req
832. take it off.Copy !req
833. don't you like it?Copy !req
834. Take it off,
there's a good lad.Copy !req
835. As you wish, sir.Copy !req
836. now, isn't that
more comfortable?Copy !req
837. Yes, sir.Copy !req
838. of course it is,
my love-loving friend.Copy !req
839. here, feel that.Copy !req
840. Hmm.Copy !req
841. good old-fashioned silk.
Hmm.Copy !req
842. Here you are.Copy !req
843. Thank you.Copy !req
844. You like it?Copy !req
845. It's beautiful.Copy !req
846. like it?Copy !req
847. (Patrick)
But did true love save kitten
from the hands of the beastCopy !req
848. in that worst of all
fairy tales?Copy !req
849. No, what saved kittenCopy !req
850. was her
precious perfume sprayCopy !req
851. bought for 2.99
in roches stores
on Henry streetCopy !req
852. before she left
her beloved emerald isle.Copy !req
853. (bertie)
Hello.Copy !req
854. I'm sorry to interrupt,Copy !req
855. but are you all right, miss?Copy !req
856. Yes, fine, thank you.Copy !req
857. Just tired after
my hard day's work.Copy !req
858. You have been sitting there
for 4 hours now.Copy !req
859. Yes, busy at my desk.Copy !req
860. Busy at your desk?Copy !req
861. Mmm-hmm.Copy !req
862. Writing my little book.Copy !req
863. Your little book?Copy !req
864. What type of book?Copy !req
865. Well, it's a...Copy !req
866. It's a mystery thriller, sir.Copy !req
867. About a woman
who disappears.Copy !req
868. May I ask what it's called?Copy !req
869. Yes.Copy !req
870. It's calledCopy !req
871. footprints in the custard.Copy !req
872. Hmm.Copy !req
873. No, I'm only joking.
It doesn't have a name yetCopy !req
874. because I don't know
what's gonna happen,Copy !req
875. if the mystery
is ever solved.Copy !req
876. But the lady has a name?Copy !req
877. Uh-huh.Copy !req
878. Phantom lady.Copy !req
879. "Phantom lady."Copy !req
880. No,
her real name's eily bergin.Copy !req
881. And she was my mother.Copy !req
882. Your mother?
Yeah.Copy !req
883. And then she went away
to the city of all citiesCopy !req
884. that never sleeps
from dusk till dawn.Copy !req
885. So, you think
she's here in London?Copy !req
886. No, I know
she's here in London.Copy !req
887. Fantastic!Copy !req
888. The fantastic tale
of eily bergin.Copy !req
889. I can't wait
to hear the ending.Copy !req
890. But you haven't
even heard the start.Copy !req
891. I can't wait
to hear that, either.Copy !req
892. So, are you a writer,
too, then, sir?Copy !req
893. Oh, good lord, no.Copy !req
894. But something similar, maybe.Copy !req
895. Something similar?
I wonder what that could be.Copy !req
896. You're a magician!Copy !req
897. Bertie Vaughan
at your service.Copy !req
898. Now, the first thing
that has to be said,
bertie dearest,Copy !req
899. is that you bear
absolutely no resemblance
to marlon "margarine" Brando.Copy !req
900. We all have our off days.Copy !req
901. So, tell me more
about the phantom lady.Copy !req
902. Why? What's in it for me?Copy !req
903. I'll take you
to see my show.Copy !req
904. Oh, it's a deal, magic.Copy !req
905. So, where were we?
Yes, the phantom lady.Copy !req
906. Eily bergin had
just arrived in dublinCopy !req
907. and just realized
that her boat didn't sailCopy !req
908. for another 4 hours.Copy !req
909. Lo and behold, not a scratch.Copy !req
910. (Bertie)
Thank you, my dear.Copy !req
911. Pick a card.Copy !req
912. Anyone?Copy !req
913. Come along, madam,
pick a card.Copy !req
914. Any card.Copy !req
915. Oh, my God!Copy !req
916. Oh, yes, blimey.Copy !req
917. "Oh, my God" is right.Copy !req
918. I do believe you've chosen
the 101 of hearts.Copy !req
919. Thank you, my dear,
I'll take care of that.Copy !req
920. Time, of course.Copy !req
921. The time. Oh.Copy !req
922. Looks like it's up,
you lovely people.Copy !req
923. Come on, help me, please,
my loves.Copy !req
924. Anyone out there
willing to encounter
the great watch?Copy !req
925. hello, young lady.
Hello.Copy !req
926. And what's the story
behind those
beautiful blue eyes?Copy !req
927. what's your name, young lady?Copy !req
928. Patricia kitten Braden.Copy !req
929. And where are
you from, my dear?Copy !req
930. Ireland.Copy !req
931. Keep your eye on the watch,
young Patricia.Copy !req
932. The whole world is in there.Copy !req
933. Tick-tock.Copy !req
934. swing-swong.Copy !req
935. and, dare I say itCopy !req
936. ding-dong.Copy !req
937. and let the great watch
guide you.Copy !req
938. and what brings you
to our great Metropolis?Copy !req
939. I'm looking for my mammy.Copy !req
940. Oh. And where did mummy go?Copy !req
941. The city swallowed her up.Copy !req
942. Oh, fancy that.Copy !req
943. Well,
it will do that to people.Copy !req
944. But do you know what,
Patricia?Copy !req
945. I think I see your mother.
Where?Copy !req
946. Why, down there
by that table by the jukebox.Copy !req
947. Mammy!Copy !req
948. On second thoughts, Patricia,Copy !req
949. she's not your mother,
she's your great-aunt Ida.Copy !req
950. That's your mother
over there.Copy !req
951. Mammy?Copy !req
952. Mammy!Copy !req
953. Oh, mammy.Copy !req
954. Actually,Copy !req
955. Patricia, that-that's
your 2nd cousin Ronnie,
just out of the scrubs.Copy !req
956. In fact,Copy !req
957. your mummy is right up here.Copy !req
958. Up here on stage.Copy !req
959. Come to mummy.Copy !req
960. Come to mummy.Copy !req
961. Come to mummy.Copy !req
962. (Bertie)
Come to mummy.Copy !req
963. You love your mummy
and your poppy.Copy !req
964. Good to have
you back, darling.Copy !req
965. And mummy's
never leaving again.Copy !req
966. Never.Copy !req
967. Never.Copy !req
968. Never, I promise. Never.Copy !req
969. Just call me old sawbones.Copy !req
970. You all right, dear?Copy !req
971. Yes.Copy !req
972. Those of
a nervous dispositionCopy !req
973. should now close their eyes.Copy !req
974. Oh, dear.Copy !req
975. Are you all right, kitten?Copy !req
976. Oh...Copy !req
977. No, I'm actually
quite heartbroken.Copy !req
978. I think I see the problem.Copy !req
979. Ooh.Copy !req
980. Gee, thanks, cupid.Copy !req
981. And the other thing
about the phantom
lady was, bertie,Copy !req
982. she realized, in
the city that never sleeps...Copy !req
983. What did she realize,
kitten?Copy !req
984. That all the songs
that she'd listened to,
all the love songs,Copy !req
985. well, they were only songs.Copy !req
986. What's wrong with that?Copy !req
987. Nothing,
if you don't believe in them.Copy !req
988. But she did, you see.Copy !req
989. She believed
in enchanted eveningsCopy !req
990. and she— and she believed
that a small cloud
passed overheadCopy !req
991. and cried down
on her flowerbed.Copy !req
992. And she even believed
there was breakfast
to be had.Copy !req
993. Where?Copy !req
994. On pluto.Copy !req
995. The mysterious,
icy wastes of pluto.Copy !req
996. (Bertie)
You know, kitten, I made
a decision a long time ago.Copy !req
997. (Patrick)
What decision was that?Copy !req
998. That I wasn't destined
for the sentimental
side of things.Copy !req
999. But...Copy !req
1000. But if I did let myself
ever fall for someone,Copy !req
1001. I think it would be
a girl like you.Copy !req
1002. Bertie, please,
I have to stop you.Copy !req
1003. There's something
you should know.Copy !req
1004. Or maybe
what I should say is,Copy !req
1005. it would be a girl...Copy !req
1006. Not a million
Miles away from...Copy !req
1007. No, please don't.Copy !req
1008. where I'm standing.Copy !req
1009. No.Copy !req
1010. What's the matter,
princess?Copy !req
1011. Well, you see,
the thing is, bertie, I'm,Copy !req
1012. I'm not...
Yes?Copy !req
1013. Um...Copy !req
1014. I'm not a girl.Copy !req
1015. Oh, I knew that, princess.Copy !req
1016. You did?Copy !req
1017. Of course.Copy !req
1018. What I said wasCopy !req
1019. it would be a girl like you.Copy !req
1020. (Bertie)
I do believe I see mummy
over there.Copy !req
1021. (Bertie)
Mammy!Copy !req
1022. Actually,
she's just walked in. There.Copy !req
1023. Mammy! Mammy.Copy !req
1024. Bastards!Copy !req
1025. Think you can
make fun of her?Copy !req
1026. You're comin' with me.Copy !req
1027. Wait!Copy !req
1028. (Bertie)
Please don't leave me.Copy !req
1029. What about
the prince of magic?Copy !req
1030. Please don't go.Copy !req
1031. Some fucking
prince of magic.Copy !req
1032. No, maybe I should...
He doesn't mean bad,
Charlie.Copy !req
1033. For Christ's sake, paddy,
what is happening to you?Copy !req
1034. Kitten!Copy !req
1035. (Patrick)
Excuse me.Copy !req
1036. John Joe. John Joe!Copy !req
1037. John Joe!Copy !req
1038. Not a womble anymore.Copy !req
1039. Don't talk to me
about fucking wombles!Copy !req
1040. I'm in
the tower of London now.Copy !req
1041. Ha. 30 smackers
in the paw, boy,
no questions asked.Copy !req
1042. Hey, they're looking
for a Mary queen of scots.Copy !req
1043. Would you be up for it?Copy !req
1044. They'd chop
my head off, surely.Copy !req
1045. And here's the man
to do it for you. Huh?Copy !req
1046. Smiley, huh?Copy !req
1047. Where's irwin gone?Copy !req
1048. Oh.Copy !req
1049. Him and his
fucking revolution.Copy !req
1050. How'd you carry it?Copy !req
1051. Bottom of my sleeping bag.Copy !req
1052. There won't be much sleeping
with this baby.Copy !req
1053. So you haven't
seen her, then?Copy !req
1054. She's—she's here,
though, somewhere.Copy !req
1055. I know it.
I just know it, Charlie.Copy !req
1056. Big fuckin' city.Copy !req
1057. I'm losin' irwin, you know.Copy !req
1058. How?Copy !req
1059. He's up to something.
I know it.Copy !req
1060. He's got these secrets.Copy !req
1061. (Patrick)
So why did you
come over, Charlie?Copy !req
1062. Wasn't just to see me.Copy !req
1063. Was it something
to do with irwin?Copy !req
1064. You might say that.Copy !req
1065. I'm pregnant.Copy !req
1066. Oh, Jesus, Charlie.Copy !req
1067. Does he know?Copy !req
1068. You know all he knows about.Copy !req
1069. Or cares.Copy !req
1070. But you didn't come here
to have the baby?Copy !req
1071. I came here
to get rid of it.Copy !req
1072. You have to
tell him, Charlie.Copy !req
1073. I can't.Copy !req
1074. He's all fucked up. He's...Copy !req
1075. So, how are the homeless?Copy !req
1076. Homeless are fine.Copy !req
1077. That's what keeps him
out late, kitten,Copy !req
1078. working with the homeless.Copy !req
1079. Right, irwin?Copy !req
1080. I can't have it,
can I, paddy?Copy !req
1081. (Patrick)
No.Copy !req
1082. No, you can't.Copy !req
1083. Irwin's involved in shit
I don't wanna think about.Copy !req
1084. I know.Copy !req
1085. What would it
turn out like, paddy?Copy !req
1086. You know what I mean,
don't you?Copy !req
1087. It'd be an absolute disaster,
like me.Copy !req
1088. Now, I want you
to read this leaflet.Copy !req
1089. It outlines all aspects
of the termination procedure.Copy !req
1090. Termination?Copy !req
1091. You mean
this is an abortion clinic?Copy !req
1092. Yes, of course it is.Copy !req
1093. Oh. I thought
it was a fertility clinic.Copy !req
1094. I think she changed her mind.
Thank you.Copy !req
1095. you said it'd be a disaster,
like you.Copy !req
1096. Worse, probably.Copy !req
1097. But I love you,
you fucking disaster.Copy !req
1098. Oh, Charlie.Copy !req
1099. (Charlie)
Promise you won't
get lost again?Copy !req
1100. I promise.Copy !req
1101. tell him.Copy !req
1102. Tell me what?Copy !req
1103. Charlie's joining
the sandinistas.Copy !req
1104. Aren't you, Charlie?Copy !req
1105. Sandinistas?
Mmm-hmm.Copy !req
1106. They're a rock band.Copy !req
1107. Aren't they, Charlie?Copy !req
1108. Where can I reach you?Copy !req
1109. try Cambridge circus.Copy !req
1110. (woman)
Thank you.Copy !req
1111. see you, paddy.Copy !req
1112. you and me, darling.
What do you say?Copy !req
1113. I don't quite know
what to say.Copy !req
1114. Christ, you're a bloke!Copy !req
1115. 10 out of 10, Sherlock.Copy !req
1116. you fancy a drink
or something?Copy !req
1117. campari and soda,
if you don't mind.Copy !req
1118. Of course I don't.Copy !req
1119. Wouldn't have
asked you otherwise,
would I?Copy !req
1120. Campari and soda,
please, mate.Copy !req
1121. (barman)
There you go, mate.Copy !req
1122. Cheers.Copy !req
1123. Thank you.Copy !req
1124. Crowded tonight.Copy !req
1125. Oh, yes.Copy !req
1126. Football supporters?Copy !req
1127. No, royal engineers.Copy !req
1128. Oh, soldiers.Copy !req
1129. Just come back
from a tour of duty.Copy !req
1130. Aden? Cyprus?
No, let me guess.Copy !req
1131. Fucking ulster.Copy !req
1132. I haven't got anything
against the Irish,
though, mind.Copy !req
1133. I hear
they're very friendly.Copy !req
1134. Don't know. Maybe.Copy !req
1135. It's the politicians
what fuck it up, though,
isn't it?Copy !req
1136. do you wanna dance?Copy !req
1137. yes, I'd love to.Copy !req
1138. You ok?Copy !req
1139. Oh, yes. Super.Copy !req
1140. You seem a little bit tense.Copy !req
1141. hmm.Copy !req
1142. Would you do
something for me?Copy !req
1143. yeah, of course.Copy !req
1144. would you pretend
your name's Bobby?Copy !req
1145. Bobby who?Copy !req
1146. Bobby goldsboro.Copy !req
1147. it's his song, you see.Copy !req
1148. Bobby it is, then.Copy !req
1149. all you have to do
is plant a little tree,Copy !req
1150. and surprise me with a puppy,Copy !req
1151. I'll hug your neck.Copy !req
1152. (Cop #1)
Back. Go to the back end.Copy !req
1153. Get as many men
down as you can.Copy !req
1154. (Paramedic)
All right, my love, we're
gonna get you out of here.Copy !req
1155. (Cop #2)
Come on, my love.
Can you stand?Copy !req
1156. That's it.Copy !req
1157. (Cop #1)
As many people as we can
get out through the door.Copy !req
1158. (Paramedic)
Take my shoulder, love.Copy !req
1159. You're all right, mate,
I've got you.Copy !req
1160. My tights.Copy !req
1161. Easy, easy.
Steady down there. Steady.Copy !req
1162. My tights!
They're in ribbons.Copy !req
1163. You're alive, love,
that's the main thing.Copy !req
1164. Come on.Copy !req
1165. I know what I'll have to do,
I'll have to get a new pair.Copy !req
1166. There's no other way,
I'm afraid.Copy !req
1167. (Paramedic)
Keep still, darling.
Don't try and move, ok?Copy !req
1168. (Paramedic)
Please, let us through now!Copy !req
1169. (Cop #3)
Watch out. Watch out.Copy !req
1170. I told you,
from my best side, darlings.Copy !req
1171. (Cop #1)
Bring the other ambulance.
Slow down.Copy !req
1172. That's it. Slowly now.Copy !req
1173. (Paramedic)
Come on, get
out of the way, please!Copy !req
1174. Come on.Copy !req
1175. Out of the way.Copy !req
1176. (Woman)
Please, nurse,
he's in so much pain.Copy !req
1177. No, they're Christian dior.
Do you really have to?Copy !req
1178. How silly can you get,
putting an "x"
across my weenie.Copy !req
1179. Not so silly
as 11 fucking people
blown to pieces,Copy !req
1180. you twisted little cunt!Copy !req
1181. (Wallis)
Fucking baby-faced,
fucking Irish murderer!Copy !req
1182. I'm sorry, did you call?Copy !req
1183. I can't quite see
where you are.Copy !req
1184. I'm over here, you see.Copy !req
1185. Millions of Miles up here
with Sirius guarding my head.Copy !req
1186. Tell him
what he wants to know!Copy !req
1187. Oh, it's free. Everyone
thinks it's cold up hereCopy !req
1188. but it's actually quite warm.Copy !req
1189. Yes, it's warm as toast
up on pluto.Copy !req
1190. Eh, pluto.Copy !req
1191. Don't try the fucking
blarney on us, paddy!Copy !req
1192. We know you planted
the fucking bomb!Copy !req
1193. But of course I did,
my darling.Copy !req
1194. Why, I've planted
hundreds of them.Copy !req
1195. (Wallis)
Have you now?
Well, plant this!Copy !req
1196. Hello, officer.Copy !req
1197. I'm over here.Copy !req
1198. Just take a left
at the milky way.Copy !req
1199. Christ,
I can't fucking stand this!Copy !req
1200. Listen, son,
why don't you just
make a statement?Copy !req
1201. A statement, officer?Copy !req
1202. Why didn't you just say so?Copy !req
1203. Attaboy. There's no point
making it hard for all of us.Copy !req
1204. Of course not.Copy !req
1205. After all,
we're all friends here.Copy !req
1206. Let's start
with where you were
on Thursday, October 17th.Copy !req
1207. I was in my little cellCopy !req
1208. working with
my active service unit.Copy !req
1209. But I was working undercover.Copy !req
1210. Undercover?
Hmm.Copy !req
1211. oh, it's all
coming back to me now.
Pen and paper, please.Copy !req
1212. (Patrick)
Patricia kitten,
a.K.A. Deep throat,Copy !req
1213. had penetrated
the deepest recesses
of the republican sphincter...Copy !req
1214. with her secret
anti-terrorist sprayCopy !req
1215. named after
Gabrielle coco chanel's
lucky number.Copy !req
1216. (leader)
The stability of semtex
will be compromised.Copy !req
1217. (Patrick)
Oh, but, lord, was she
sick of that black.Copy !req
1218. What is it
with freedom fighters
and couture anyway?Copy !req
1219. you've got fuse support
and booster charge.Copy !req
1220. What can I say?
We've got here
the pressure plate—Copy !req
1221. is there anyone here?Copy !req
1222. Why won't he just
talk to us?Copy !req
1223. Did he or didn't he,
dressed as a woman,
get caught by his own bomb?Copy !req
1224. We've held him 6 days now.
7's the Max.Copy !req
1225. (Wallis)
Paddy?Copy !req
1226. You all right?Copy !req
1227. Fine. Absolutely wonderful.Copy !req
1228. Meet us halfway,
will you, paddy?Copy !req
1229. Tell us why you
came over here.Copy !req
1230. Well, well, I was just
looking for someone.Copy !req
1231. I was just looking for
eily bergin.Copy !req
1232. Who's eily bergin,
paddy?Copy !req
1233. She's gone undercover now.Copy !req
1234. The biggest city in the world
swallowed her up.Copy !req
1235. Could she help us
with our inquiries, paddy?Copy !req
1236. She could help me with mine.Copy !req
1237. Do you want us to find her?
Have you got an address?Copy !req
1238. You could try
the house that vanished.Copy !req
1239. The house that vanished.Copy !req
1240. Oh, Christ.Copy !req
1241. I think
we're all losing it.Copy !req
1242. We're gonna get
some sleep now, paddy.Copy !req
1243. We're gonna get some sleep.Copy !req
1244. Look, I think we may
have made a mistake.Copy !req
1245. Officer?Copy !req
1246. What is it now?Copy !req
1247. (Patrick)
If you came home
from the officeCopy !req
1248. and you found me
lying on the floor,Copy !req
1249. would you take me
to the hospital?Copy !req
1250. Well, of course I would.Copy !req
1251. And would you carry me
like you're doing now?Copy !req
1252. Well, yeah.Copy !req
1253. So if I wasn't
a transvestite terrorist,
would you marry me?Copy !req
1254. No, for fuck's sake.Copy !req
1255. Well, is officer Wallis
gonna be a happy man or what?Copy !req
1256. We've held you too long
by all accounts. Look.Copy !req
1257. Oh.Copy !req
1258. Oh, no, you can't.Copy !req
1259. You can't. Not when
I'm settling in so well.Copy !req
1260. Take your head
off my shoulder, son.Copy !req
1261. You don't understand, paddy.
We can't keep you here.Copy !req
1262. It's impossible.
We couldn't even
if we wanted to.Copy !req
1263. Fuck this,
I'm going on a long holiday.Copy !req
1264. Wife says I need it.Copy !req
1265. Come on!Copy !req
1266. Come on, just for one day.
It wouldn't kill you.Copy !req
1267. Sorry, paddy.
It's impossible.Copy !req
1268. Ok, a half-a-day, please?Copy !req
1269. No.Copy !req
1270. Look, do you mind me asking?Copy !req
1271. I mean, why do you wanna...Copy !req
1272. I mean,
it don't make any sense.Copy !req
1273. It just makes me feel secure.Copy !req
1274. Secure?Copy !req
1275. Yes, you see, in the cell,Copy !req
1276. sometimes I think my legs
are turning into airCopy !req
1277. and I'm floating in space,
and I'm all alone.Copy !req
1278. "Galactic aloneness,"
I've heard that called.Copy !req
1279. Please, routledge.Copy !req
1280. I just wanna belong.Copy !req
1281. I'd be your best prisoner.
I'd cook and I'd clean
and I'd—I'd sweepCopy !req
1282. and I'd—I'd iron
all the uniforms. I...Copy !req
1283. Hey, paddy!
I just wanna...Copy !req
1284. No, I'm afraid
it's goodbye now.Copy !req
1285. All right,
go get that bus there.Copy !req
1286. Go on!Copy !req
1287. Jennifer Jones
and William holden.Copy !req
1288. love is
a many-splendored thing?Copy !req
1289. have you ever been in love?Copy !req
1290. once I thought I was.Copy !req
1291. He was a lucky man.Copy !req
1292. I'd pay you.Copy !req
1293. I'd give you
whatever you wanted.Copy !req
1294. Whatever you wanted,
I'd give you.Copy !req
1295. that's my mammy!
That's my mammy!Copy !req
1296. Excuse me! Excuse me.Copy !req
1297. Excuse me.
Excuse me. Excuse me.Copy !req
1298. excuse me.
Excuse me, excuse me.Copy !req
1299. hello!Copy !req
1300. Hello, sir.
Can I be of assistance?Copy !req
1301. I don't do anything heavy,
but aside from
that I'd be more...Copy !req
1302. I could have you arrested,
you know.Copy !req
1303. Well, icky-oakie me.Copy !req
1304. Get in.Copy !req
1305. This is no life
for a young man
like you, Patrick.Copy !req
1306. Well, cuff me then.Copy !req
1307. Carry me to my sweet cell.Copy !req
1308. No.Copy !req
1309. Oh, wait,
you're not an actual punter,
are you? How exciting.Copy !req
1310. No, it's not...
It's not that either.Copy !req
1311. It's a lot more serious
than that, Patrick.Copy !req
1312. Well, of course it is,
of course it's serious.Copy !req
1313. Everything's serious.Copy !req
1314. Oh, you're gonna
die out there, paddy!Copy !req
1315. I know.Copy !req
1316. Why don't you try
and get a regular job?Copy !req
1317. Well, to tell you the truth,
inspector,
I'm not that employable.Copy !req
1318. So I gathered.Copy !req
1319. Fucking hell.Copy !req
1320. Come with me.Copy !req
1321. A group of girls
got themselves off the street,
Patrick.Copy !req
1322. Set up a co-op.Copy !req
1323. What do you mean,
"co-op"?Copy !req
1324. You know, like...
Sort of like...Copy !req
1325. A union, you could call it.Copy !req
1326. Girls?Copy !req
1327. Hello. Come on.Copy !req
1328. It's not ideal,
but it's safeCopy !req
1329. and legal.Copy !req
1330. Casandra.Copy !req
1331. Goddess of destruction.Copy !req
1332. Girls? Hello.
(All)
Hello.Copy !req
1333. This is Patrick.Copy !req
1334. Hello, Patrick.
Hello.Copy !req
1335. He's a friend of mine,
so be gentle. Hello, Sam.Copy !req
1336. We're always nice.
Patrick,
do you wanna play poker?Copy !req
1337. Love poker.Copy !req
1338. Yeah, we'll put him in.Copy !req
1339. (Wallis)
Are you all right?Copy !req
1340. You'll be
working with us?Copy !req
1341. I hope so. If you'll have me.Copy !req
1342. We're a nice bunch here.Copy !req
1343. No bitchiness
or nothing here.
Look at his hair.Copy !req
1344. Hmm.
So where are you from?Copy !req
1345. (Patrick)
Uh, cavan.Copy !req
1346. Oh, very nice.
I'm from dublin.Copy !req
1347. You'll do well here.Copy !req
1348. You'll like us girls.Copy !req
1349. So you'll
definitely like it here.Copy !req
1350. (Patrick)
Dear Charlie,
sorry I haven't been in touchCopy !req
1351. and I hope that everything
is going fine with you.Copy !req
1352. How's the bump?Copy !req
1353. Just writing to say
that I've got a new address.Copy !req
1354. It's xanadu
on old Compton streetCopy !req
1355. and you can reach me there
at any time.Copy !req
1356. I'm saving like mad
to get over to see you
when it happens in...Copy !req
1357. What is it? 4 months,
2 weeks, and 3 days.Copy !req
1358. Hello.Copy !req
1359. (Man)
Show me your bazoozums.Copy !req
1360. I beg your pardon?Copy !req
1361. You know.Copy !req
1362. What's that?Copy !req
1363. Now, listen, sir,
we can't all have
big bazoozums.Copy !req
1364. Some of us are what
you might call svelte.Copy !req
1365. Svelte?Copy !req
1366. Yes. That's a Swedish word,
I believe.Copy !req
1367. There's also a French one.Copy !req
1368. Aye, give me the French.Copy !req
1369. Gamine.Copy !req
1370. Gamine?Copy !req
1371. Yes,
and that's what I am, sir.Copy !req
1372. A svelte gamine.Copy !req
1373. not "waggly,"waggedy."
"Waggedy tail."Copy !req
1374. Dear sir unseen,
I know my musicCopy !req
1375. and I'm willing
to bet you 10 timesCopy !req
1376. whatever pathetic price
you paid in hereCopy !req
1377. that the dog's tail
is waggly.Copy !req
1378. Now I wanna hear you bark.Copy !req
1379. hello.Copy !req
1380. Please don't do that.Copy !req
1381. as you wish, sir.Copy !req
1382. I don't do this
sort of thing often.Copy !req
1383. That's all right, sir,
we've got lots of time.Copy !req
1384. I knew a boy like you once.Copy !req
1385. Oh, I'm not a boy, sir,
I'm a girl.Copy !req
1386. Oh, you're a girl.Copy !req
1387. Yes.Copy !req
1388. You can call me Patricia.Copy !req
1389. That's my name, sir.Copy !req
1390. Can I tell you a story,
Patricia?Copy !req
1391. Oh, please do.
Stories are what I love.Copy !req
1392. You love stories?Copy !req
1393. Love stories.Copy !req
1394. Even more than mysteries.Copy !req
1395. Don't do that,
please, please.Copy !req
1396. Very well, sir, I'm all ears.Copy !req
1397. once upon a time,
there was a boyCopy !req
1398. who never knew his
father and mother.Copy !req
1399. Oh, how sad.
How unbearably sad.Copy !req
1400. Was he an unbearably sad
little boy?Copy !req
1401. he didn't seem so.Copy !req
1402. No, he laughed.
He laughed a lot.Copy !req
1403. Perhaps the kind of laughter
that disguises tears?Copy !req
1404. Maybe laughter
was the only way to...Copy !req
1405. uh, deal with...Copy !req
1406. Please go on. To deal with...Copy !req
1407. To deal with
his circumstances.Copy !req
1408. You seem to
understand this boy
quite well, sir.Copy !req
1409. I—I knew his father.Copy !req
1410. And?Copy !req
1411. AndCopy !req
1412. though his father
loved him very much,Copy !req
1413. he could never tell
the boy how much...Copy !req
1414. How much?Copy !req
1415. Um...Copy !req
1416. He could never tell the boy
how much he loved him.Copy !req
1417. Well, this can't be
a true story. It can't be.Copy !req
1418. Why not?Copy !req
1419. Why could he not tell the boy
how much he loved him?Copy !req
1420. Because he didn't know how.Copy !req
1421. He had the words
for many things, you see,Copy !req
1422. but he didn't have
the words for that.Copy !req
1423. There are only 3 words
for that.Copy !req
1424. They're easy to say.Copy !req
1425. Sometimes they are.Copy !req
1426. other times, they're not.
Other times, they're...Copy !req
1427. They're—they're impossible.Copy !req
1428. and he—he loved
the boy's mother, too,Copy !req
1429. but that was— that was
equally impossible.Copy !req
1430. And...Copy !req
1431. So he never told the boy?Copy !req
1432. he never told him
and then the boy leftCopy !req
1433. and came to england,
and the father had...Copy !req
1434. lots of time to think
about all the things,Copy !req
1435. all the things
that might have been,
should have been.Copy !req
1436. He had all the time
in the world to think.Copy !req
1437. And what did he think about?Copy !req
1438. He thought,
he imagined perhaps,Copy !req
1439. that the boy
had come to englandCopy !req
1440. looking for his mother.Copy !req
1441. And what was
his mother's name?Copy !req
1442. Her name was eily.
Eily bergin.Copy !req
1443. Oh, God.Copy !req
1444. And so the father thought
the one thing he could doCopy !req
1445. was tell him where
he could find his mother.Copy !req
1446. where to find
the phantom lady?Copy !req
1447. Huh? What?Copy !req
1448. Please, go on.Copy !req
1449. She married, had 2 children.Copy !req
1450. Probably won't
want to see him.Copy !req
1451. But where does she live?Copy !req
1452. 19 Spencer rise, in kilburn.Copy !req
1453. 'cause you know what I want,
I want English,Copy !req
1454. I want conservative,Copy !req
1455. I want east finchley...
Yeah.Copy !req
1456. I want powerful.
Hmm.Copy !req
1457. You think it works?Copy !req
1458. I think you look
better than her.Copy !req
1459. I do look better
than her, don't I?
You do.Copy !req
1460. do you need help, miss?Copy !req
1461. Uh...Copy !req
1462. Yes, I-I-I'm doing a survey
for British telecom.Copy !req
1463. Um...Copy !req
1464. Do you know
where 19 Spencer rise is?Copy !req
1465. That's my house. There.Copy !req
1466. It's your...Copy !req
1467. Can't you read numbers?Copy !req
1468. Oh, yes, I can read numbers.Copy !req
1469. So, what's the survey?Copy !req
1470. Well, it's,
it's about telephones.Copy !req
1471. D-do you have a telephone?Copy !req
1472. Everyone has a telephone.Copy !req
1473. No, not everyone, young man.Copy !req
1474. Some people can't afford one.Copy !req
1475. Well, we can.Copy !req
1476. I see.Copy !req
1477. and so what is your name?Copy !req
1478. My name's Patrick.Copy !req
1479. Patrick.Copy !req
1480. Patrick.Copy !req
1481. And how many phones
do you have, Patrick?Copy !req
1482. Shouldn't you be
asking my mother?Copy !req
1483. Yes. Yes, of course I should.Copy !req
1484. Um...Copy !req
1485. And where would I find her?Copy !req
1486. Mum, there's a nice lady here
doing a survey...Copy !req
1487. are you... oh, my God!Copy !req
1488. (eily)
You feeling better, love?Copy !req
1489. Oh, yes, thank you.Copy !req
1490. Some more tea?Copy !req
1491. No, thank you.Copy !req
1492. So, what's this
survey about, then?Copy !req
1493. (English Patrick)
Oh, it's about phones, mum.Copy !req
1494. Phones? With telecom?Copy !req
1495. Yes, British telecom.Copy !req
1496. Um...Copy !req
1497. Are you
a multi-phone household?Copy !req
1498. Yes. Yes, we've got 3.Copy !req
1499. Uh, one in the bedroom,
one in the kitchen,
and one in Geoffrey's office.Copy !req
1500. Geoffrey...Copy !req
1501. Is my husband.Copy !req
1502. Oh.Copy !req
1503. Um...Copy !req
1504. Sorry. Um...Copy !req
1505. How frequently is
your telephone used?Copy !req
1506. Very. Laura's never off it.Copy !req
1507. Laura?Copy !req
1508. My daughter. She's 13.
Oh.Copy !req
1509. I see, I see.Copy !req
1510. You don't have much use
for the phone,
though, do you, Patrick?Copy !req
1511. No, I suppose not.
Mmm-hmm.Copy !req
1512. Um...Copy !req
1513. Well, miss...Copy !req
1514. J-Johnson. Delia johnston.Copy !req
1515. Johnston.Copy !req
1516. If you've any
other questions,
don't hesitate to call.Copy !req
1517. No, I think I have
more than enough,
thank you.Copy !req
1518. Uh, thank you for the tea.
Oh, you're welcome.Copy !req
1519. Bye.Copy !req
1520. (English Patrick)
Shouldn't you have a uniform?Copy !req
1521. No,
I shouldn't have a uniform.Copy !req
1522. The men who put the phones in
have a uniform.Copy !req
1523. Do they, now?Copy !req
1524. Aren't they from telecom?Copy !req
1525. Yes, they are.Copy !req
1526. Then how come
telecom don't know
how many phones we have?Copy !req
1527. Well, because it's from
a different department.Copy !req
1528. Why don't you
just phone up, then,
and ask the questions?Copy !req
1529. Because there's nothing
like the personal touch,
now, is there?Copy !req
1530. Why don't—Copy !req
1531. young man,
I get the feeling
you don't like me.Copy !req
1532. You're wrong.
I think you're nice.Copy !req
1533. Well, I think
you're nice, too.Copy !req
1534. W-why are you crying?Copy !req
1535. It's conjunctivitis.Copy !req
1536. (Charlie)
I gave your address
to father Liam,Copy !req
1537. and I hope you don't mind.Copy !req
1538. He's been very kind
to me, kitten,Copy !req
1539. and I need all the kindness
I can get.Copy !req
1540. The special branch lifted me
on a dope charge, you see.Copy !req
1541. And they used that
to get to irwin.Copy !req
1542. They lifted Charlie
on the dope charge.Copy !req
1543. They said
she'd be having the baby
in prison, if I didn't—Copy !req
1544. (jackie)
If you didn't what, irwin?Copy !req
1545. If I didn't inform them
about operations.Copy !req
1546. You do it.
No, you do it.Copy !req
1547. I can't. I went to school
with his brother.Copy !req
1548. Hey, lads,
did you hear the one
about the cavan man?Copy !req
1549. What cavan man?Copy !req
1550. Cavan man in—Copy !req
1551. what will I call you?Copy !req
1552. father.Copy !req
1553. You call me "father."
Come in.Copy !req
1554. I can't.Copy !req
1555. I prayed, you know.
I prayed you'd come back.Copy !req
1556. Did you find her?Copy !req
1557. Yes. No. Kind of.Copy !req
1558. Where's Charlie?Copy !req
1559. She's upstairs. Come on.Copy !req
1560. after the drugs charge,
there were problems at home,Copy !req
1561. so I took her in.Copy !req
1562. She hardly eats a thing,
you know.
She's wasting away.Copy !req
1563. Maybe you could...Copy !req
1564. Where do you sleep, father?Copy !req
1565. Oh, don't worry
about me.Copy !req
1566. Charlie.Copy !req
1567. (Charlie)
Is that you, kitten?Copy !req
1568. Charlie. Take it easy now.Copy !req
1569. Swann's cross.Copy !req
1570. They put a rubbish bag
over his head.Copy !req
1571. Hush, Charlie.Copy !req
1572. My parents told me
to go back where I came from.Copy !req
1573. Don't think
about it, Charlie.Copy !req
1574. Your baby,
that's all that matters now.Copy !req
1575. And I'm here to help you.Copy !req
1576. Robins, father.
Would you believe it?Copy !req
1577. Pecking at the cream.Copy !req
1578. I'm sure the poor things
must be starved.Copy !req
1579. Ta.Copy !req
1580. you have your mother's eyes,
do you know that, Patrick?Copy !req
1581. Color of the ocean
beyond rosses point.Copy !req
1582. You took her there?Copy !req
1583. Many times.Copy !req
1584. Things could have been
so different.Copy !req
1585. Shh.Copy !req
1586. Don't say anything.Copy !req
1587. Because, you know,
the strangest thing...Copy !req
1588. I went looking for her,Copy !req
1589. but I found you.Copy !req
1590. (Mrs. Clarke)
No, in the end
it was a blessed release.Copy !req
1591. (Shopkeeper)
She was a lovely woman.Copy !req
1592. She never missed
a day at mass.Copy !req
1593. When they opened her up,
they found a lump
as big as a melon.Copy !req
1594. A melon? That big?Copy !req
1595. Maybe it was a grapefruit.
I get them mixed up.Copy !req
1596. So, we're not exactly
blessed with choice,
father, dear.Copy !req
1597. And is there any rule
that says that
when you're pregnant,Copy !req
1598. you need to dress
like a lollipop lady?Copy !req
1599. I know of
no such rule, Patrick.Copy !req
1600. No, so I thought.Copy !req
1601. This little hippy number
might give her
the lift she needs.Copy !req
1602. (Liam)
Hmm. Very nice.Copy !req
1603. (Patrick)
Velvet, father.
Like crushed grass.Copy !req
1604. Oh, look, father.Copy !req
1605. Oh, can we try
the silver fur, missus?Copy !req
1606. Is it for yourself?Copy !req
1607. 25 different
colored babygros.Copy !req
1608. 4 Teddy bears,
I can understand,Copy !req
1609. but I don't need
a pram yet, kitten.Copy !req
1610. You will.Copy !req
1611. Where did you
get the money?Copy !req
1612. Oh, singing. Ahem.Copy !req
1613. is it waggedy or waggly,
Charlie?Copy !req
1614. Waggly.Copy !req
1615. No, wait a minute.Copy !req
1616. Oh, father?Copy !req
1617. Yoo-hoo.
(Liam)
Oh, yes.Copy !req
1618. You know
the doggy with the tail?Copy !req
1619. Is it waggly or waggedy?Copy !req
1620. The song?Copy !req
1621. Um, waggedy,
I seem to remember.Copy !req
1622. Your mother never
stopped singing it.Copy !req
1623. (Liam)
Aye, waggedy tail.Copy !req
1624. Waggedy.Copy !req
1625. (Mrs. Clarke)
Oh, Jesus Christ
and his holy mother.Copy !req
1626. Why doesn't the bishop
do something?
The bishop!Copy !req
1627. The bishop we have
isn't worth a damn.Copy !req
1628. (Robin #1)
What did she say?Copy !req
1629. (Robin #2)
The bishop isn't worth a damn!Copy !req
1630. (Robin #1)
Now mind your language missus!Copy !req
1631. Do you know something,
Thomas?Copy !req
1632. There are times
when I wish
I was a bus conductor.Copy !req
1633. Patrick!Copy !req
1634. Charlie!Copy !req
1635. (Charlie)
The welfare state
and all.Copy !req
1636. Can't stay here, anyways.Copy !req
1637. But you'll come
and see us, father?Copy !req
1638. After the baby's—Copy !req
1639. well, the only parish
I've been offeredCopy !req
1640. is in kilburn,
so you might see a lot of me.Copy !req
1641. You saved my life, father.Copy !req
1642. And mine.Copy !req
1643. Great, big, fireproof man.Copy !req
1644. (Patrick)
Come on, Charlie,
push! Push!Copy !req
1645. Well, I am pushing, kitten,
fuck you!Copy !req
1646. I am pushing!
Breathe.Copy !req
1647. Jesus!Copy !req
1648. Come on.Copy !req
1649. It's tearing me apart!Copy !req
1650. Hey,
you're the telephone lady.Copy !req
1651. Oh, well.Copy !req
1652. If it isn't the young boy
from
the multi-phone household.Copy !req
1653. What are you doing here?Copy !req
1654. Mum's with the doctor.
She's, you know,
got a bun in the fireplace.Copy !req
1655. I think you mean the oven,
young man.Copy !req
1656. Ok, then, the oven.Copy !req
1657. W-what's your name?Copy !req
1658. phantom lady.Copy !req
1659. That's a funny name.Copy !req
1660. I know that.
I'm a funny lady.Copy !req
1661. Is that your baby?Copy !req
1662. No, it's hers.Copy !req
1663. she's having
her fireplace checked.Copy !req
1664. Isn't she? Yes, she is.Copy !req
1665. Charlie, darling, this is—Copy !req
1666. Patrick.Copy !req
1667. This is my young
friend Patrick.Copy !req
1668. So, how's your fireplace?Copy !req
1669. Oh.Copy !req
1670. My fireplace is 100%.Copy !req
1671. And your little bun
is just fine, too,
aren't you? Yes, you are.Copy !req
1672. Patrick, there's your mum.
You'd better run.Copy !req
1673. Ok.Copy !req
1674. Patrick,
will you tell her thatCopy !req
1675. the telephone lady says
that she hopes
it's a girl this time.Copy !req
1676. Ok.
Ok.Copy !req
1677. She looks nothing like
mitzi gaynor.Copy !req
1678. What do you know
about mitzi gaynor?Copy !req
1679. Nothing.
But as Oscar wilde said...Copy !req
1680. "I love talking about nothing.Copy !req
1681. "It's the only thing
I know anything about."Copy !req