1. Yeah.
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2. - Hey, guess what, Mom.
- What?
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3. - I figured out where wasps come from.
- Oh, yeah? Where?
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4. Well, I think it must be
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5. if you flick a rock into the air just right,
it'll turn into a wasp.
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6. - Dang!
- Yep.
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7. That's cool.
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8. So, how was your day at school?
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9. Fine.
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10. Yeah, I had a good meeting
with Miss Butler this time. I kinda liked her.
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11. What did she say?
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12. Well, she said that you weren't turning in
your homework assignments.
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13. And I told her, "I know he does them
'cause I check 'em every night."
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14. She said she found a big chunk of 'em
crumpled up at the bottom of your backpack.
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15. She didn't ask for 'em.
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16. Well, baby, she doesn't have to.
You're just supposed to turn 'em in.
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17. And she said you're still
staring out the window all day.
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18. Not all day.
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19. And she said that you destroyed
her pencil sharpener.
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20. Not on purpose.
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21. Wait, she said that you crammed
a bunch of rocks in it.
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22. I thought if it can sharpen pencils,
maybe it could sharpen rocks.
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23. Well, what were you gonna do
with a bunch of sharpened rocks?
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24. I was trying to make arrowheads
for my rock collection.
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25. Hmm.
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26. - Dude, it's my turn!
- Hold on.
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27. Mason!
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28. Samantha!
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29. Oh! Tommy.
Is Mason down there?
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30. Yeah.
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31. Well, tell him he has to
come home for dinner.
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32. Okay.
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33. Where do you think you're going?
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34. Wait. Come back here.
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35. - Hey.
- Hey, sweetie.
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36. Why aren't you ready?
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37. - Hey, Mason.
- Hey, Ted.
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38. - Come on, come on. Hurry up. Let's go.
- What time is it?
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39. It's 9:00. Let's go, let's go.
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40. Okay, I meant to call you 'cause
Janice flaked out. I don't have a sitter.
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41. Why didn't you call somebody else?
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42. Well, I can't get a babysitter now.
It's 9:00.
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43. But you're welcome to hang out with us.
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44. Well, no. I mean, we have plans.
The guys are expecting me.
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45. - Well, you can go.
- All right.
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46. Yeah, well, I'll come back
in a couple of hours.
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47. Is that okay?
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48. - Yeah. Yes. It's okay.
- All right.
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49. "Turn back! Turn back!
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50. I don't wanna talk to Moaning Myrtle.
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51. 'Who?' said Harry
as they backtracked quickly.
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52. 'She haunts one of the toilets in the girls
bathroom on the first floor, ' said Hermione.
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53. 'She haunts a toilet?'
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54. 'Yes, it's been out of order all year
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55. because she keeps having tantrums
and flooding the place.
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56. I never went in there anyway
if I could avoid it.
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57. It's awful trying to have a pee
with her wailing at you."'
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58. Why can't you just say that?
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59. - I'm sorry. I don't want to go with you.
- You're sorry. That's bullshit!
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60. That's right. I wanna stay here with my kids.
That's what I'd rather do.
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61. Would you stop using your kids
as an excuse!
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62. I'm not using my kids as an excuse!
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63. You don't even know -
You're acting -
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64. You have this immature life.
You have no responsibilities.
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65. - I have an immature life?
- I have responsibilities.
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66. - You don't know what it's like to be a parent.
- No, I don't!
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67. - And why am I responsible
for your mistakes in life?
- If you had any idea -
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68. Don't call my kids mistakes!
Don't!
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69. I didn't call your kids -
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70. You said, "You're respons - your mistakes
in your life," pointing at my kids.
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71. - Immediately you use your kids again.
- This is the reality -
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72. - I am a parent! That means responsibility.
- I know you're a parent.
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73. I would love to have
some time to myself!
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74. I would love to
just go to a fuckin' movie!
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75. You don't think I'd like that?
Go have some dinner, go to a bar?
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76. I don't even know what that's like.
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77. I was someone's daughter,
then I was somebody's fucking mother!
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78. Okay? I don't know what that's like.
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79. Quit it!
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80. Mom!
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81. - Do you guys know what time it is?
- He's throwing things at me.
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82. Mason.
Do not throw things at your sister.
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83. She's faking. She hit me first.
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84. Listen, both of you.
I'm going back to bed.
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85. I don't wanna hear another peep
out of here for an hour.
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86. Go to sleep.
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87. - Faker!
- Hey!
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88. Oh!
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89. Look at that.
Found it in the street.
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90. - Dude!
- Dude!
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91. I know, right?
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92. Look at those.
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93. Ooh. Look at those!
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94. Oh!
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95. So listen, guys, I wanna talk
to you about something.
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96. You might not like this idea at first,
but we're moving to Houston.
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97. - When?
- Well, soon.
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98. We should be out by the first so we
don't have to pay two rents next month.
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99. No, Mother, we're not moving.
Nope. Nope. Sorry, Mom.
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100. Nope. Nope.
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101. Samantha, I have to go back to college
so I can make us a better living.
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102. With this job, I can't take care of us
the way I'd like to.
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103. I can't keep going this way.
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104. And Grandma said she'd help us out.
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105. And it would be nice to be near her.
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106. Fine, Mother. You can do whatever you want,
but we're not moving.
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107. What about our friends?
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108. Baby, we can e-mail them or write.
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109. We can come back to visit.
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110. And guess what.
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111. This place that Grandma found us,
you'll each have your own room.
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112. Right?
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113. And there's a pool.
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114. Mom, do you still love Dad?
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115. I still love your father,
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116. but that doesn't mean
it was healthy for us to stay together.
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117. What if after we move,
he's trying to find us and he can't?
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118. Oh, that won't be a problem.
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119. He can call Grandma,
and she'll tell him
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120. or he can call Information.
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121. We won't be hard to find.
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122. Is he still in Alaska?
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123. Well, that's what your uncle says.
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124. Probably taming polar bears
or something.
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125. Yeah. Well, I hope they're taming him.
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126. Here. Wanna help me out?
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127. - Sure.
- Okay.
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128. Take this paint very carefully
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129. and paint any little smudge or mark
or anything on the baseboard there,
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130. behind the door and all around
the doorways on the inside.
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131. She says we're gonna come visit,
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132. and I'm gonna write and call you.
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133. Oh, wait. Hold on a second.
I'm getting another call.
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134. Hello?
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135. Sorry, Tommy. Mason can't
come over today. We're moving.
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136. And I'm on the other line. Bye.
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137. Althea?
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138. I'm gonna be sending
the scout instructions.
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139. E-mail and write back telling me
how the other scouts are doing.
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140. Well, because you're the leader now.
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141. Okay, let's go, 'cause I wanna
get there before it gets dark.
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142. Good-bye, yard. Good-bye, crepe myrtle.
Good-bye, mailbox.
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143. Good-bye, box of stuff Mommy won't let us
take with us but we don't wanna throw away.
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144. Good-bye, house. I'll never like Mommy
as much for making us move.
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145. Samantha!
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146. Why don't you say good-bye
to that little horseshit attitude, okay?
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147. 'Cause we're not taking that in the car.
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148. Good-bye, old lady who listens
to rock music and rides a motorcycle.
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149. Hey! Hey, what's happening
back there?
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150. Stop. Put the barrier up. Hey!
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151. Hey! Put the pillow between you.
Make a barrier.
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152. Come on. Stop.
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153. We're gonna play a game
called The Game of Silence.
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154. Whoever can stay quiet
for the longest period of time wins.
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155. You guys think you can do that?
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156. Okay, go.
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157. The bus'll be here in 10 minutes.
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158. Put that homework in your backpack.
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159. Go eat.
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160. - Baby, go eat.
- I am!
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161. Speak English!
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162. Shut up. Mom!
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163. She's speaking that
stupid language again!
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164. Samantha!
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165. I was speaking
perfectly clear English, Mother.
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166. You know, he's a little slow in the head.
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167. - He did officially flunk first grade.
- Sit your butt down.
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168. Yes, sir, Mother, sir.
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169. All right, listen up, guys.
Grandma's gonna pick you up after school.
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170. Your dad's in town for the day, so you're
gonna spend the afternoon with him.
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171. Is he moving back?
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172. I don't know.
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173. We haven't seen him
in about 80 years.
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174. Like, a year and a half.
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175. Ha-ha!
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176. - Oh, please.
- Can we please eat here?
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177. The bus is coming.
Who wants syrup?
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178. All right. Nice cursive.
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179. Okay, Mason, when I check the mobiles,
am I gonna find yours?
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180. - No.
- And why not?
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181. 'Cause I didn't finish 'em.
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182. - Well, it's time to finish it.
- Just a minute.
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183. No, let's do Apple Quit.
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184. Time to finish your work, Mason.
Apple Quit.
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185. So this is my history test.
Mm-hmm.
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186. A-plus. Very good.
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187. - And that's another history test.
- Mm-hmm, and another "A."
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188. Yeah, well, it doesn't have
a "plus," but, oh, well.
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189. And then, um,
that's my report on lizards.
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190. Oh. Let me see your pictures.
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191. - Oh, yeah, these are my pictures.
- What is that?
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192. - Well, that's called a dewlap.
- A dewlap, okay.
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193. Oh, yeah, this is a math test.
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194. Oh, "A" again.
Mase, that's the last candy, okay?
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195. Okay.
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196. We need to put this stuff up.
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197. That's him.
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198. Daddy! Hi!
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199. Hey! Oh! Look at you.
You're so big!
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200. Hey, M.J.!
What's happening, buddy?
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201. - You guys ready to have some fun?
- Yeah!
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202. Yeah! All right.
Hey, Catherine, how are you?
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203. - I'm good.
- Good to see you.
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204. What time should I have
these rascals back?
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205. Oh, I don't know.
Around 7:30, I guess.
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206. I got to get 'em home by 8:00.
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207. Why don't I take 'em over
to their mom's?
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208. No, that's okay. She's expecting me.
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209. Ah, that's all right.
You guys know where it is, don't you?
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210. All right, I'll do it. It's no problem.
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211. - I don't think that's such a good idea.
- Look, it's no problem.
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212. You guys ready to go? Let's do it!
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213. Go? Wait a minute.
You got to get your stuff.
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214. - Oh, right.
- Your backpack, your purse.
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215. Homework. Go to the bathroom.
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216. I can't believe how big they are.
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217. Yeah. Time's going by.
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218. Yeah. It must be nice for you,
having them here in Houston.
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219. I love it, yeah.
I'm volunteering at their school.
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220. Yeah? What you doing over there?
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221. I'm in the library,
reading to the little ones.
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222. Ah, great.
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223. So, Alaska, huh?
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224. Yeah.
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225. - Are you back?
- We'll see.
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226. - How's Liv?
- She's a busy girl.
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227. Yeah. She's back in school.
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228. But she's working, and single parenting -
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229. a lot to juggle.
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230. - You guys got everything, huh?
- Yeah.
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231. - Say good-bye to your grandmother.
- Bye, Grandma!
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232. All right. Let's roll! Now, wait a second.
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233. You're not the type of kids
who like presents, are you?
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234. - Yes!
- Nah!
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235. - Of course we are!
- Presents? Really? Let's go!
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236. Yay!
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237. - I call front seat!
- I wanted the front seat though.
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238. All right.
Mason gets it on the way there,
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239. and Samantha gets it
on the way back, huh?
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240. - Hop in there.
- Seat belts!
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241. Seat belts. All right.
Don't forget your seat belts.
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242. Not like this car
has any seat belts, but -
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243. Nice. Nice!
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244. Nice!
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245. Yeah! All right!
Come here! Come here!
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246. Yes! Oh! That was awesome!
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247. - Yay!
- Get up there, Mason! Get up there!
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248. That was so good. Come on.
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249. Let 'em know who you are, buddy.
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250. Let 'em know who you are. Mwah!
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251. Yes! Yes! Yes!
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252. All right. All right.
Don't worry about it.
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253. Wish I could use the bumpers.
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254. Bumpers are for kids.
You know?
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255. What are you, two years old?
You don't want the bumpers.
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256. Life doesn't give you bumpers.
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257. There we -
There we go. There we go!
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258. We got something there.
We got something!
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259. We got something! Oh!
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260. Last time I went bowling, we had bumpers,
and it was a lot more fun.
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261. You don't want the bumpers, all right?
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262. You bowl a strike with the bumpers,
it doesn't mean anything.
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263. Trust me.
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264. Just lay it out on the lane.
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265. One, two, three and -
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266. Ka-blam!
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267. Let's hear it for the father! Boom!
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268. - Get up there. Get in there.
- Great job!
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269. Get out there!
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270. Four Blackwater
operatives have been viciously attacked
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271. in their cars in Falluja.
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272. The bodies and cars were set on fire
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273. after insurgents started shooting -
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274. Look at this. It's a disaster.
Let me tell you what's happening in Iraq.
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275. Exactly what every thinking person
in the world knew was gonna happen
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276. before they got started.
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277. Bush and his little numb-nut fanatics he's
got around him, they don't give a rat's ass.
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278. That's a quarter.
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279. - What's a quarter?
- You said A-S-S.
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280. Oh, sorry. My bad.
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281. My teacher says it's a good war
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282. because it's better
to be safe than sorry.
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283. That's what they're teaching you in school?
All right. Listen to me.
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284. Listen to your father, okay?
That is the lie. That's the big lie.
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285. Iraq had nothing to do with what happened
at the World Trade Center.
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286. - You know that, right?
- I guess.
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287. Who are you gonna vote for
next fall, M.J.?
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288. I don't know.
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289. He can't vote. He's not 18.
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290. All right. Who would you vote for?
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291. - Kerry?
- Anybody but Bush, okay?
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292. Are you gonna move back?
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293. Uh, I'm plannin' on it.
I got to find a job.
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294. Are you and Mom
gonna get back together?
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295. I don't know.
That's not entirely up to me, you know?
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296. I remember when I was six,
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297. you and Mom were fighting like mad.
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298. You were yelling so loud,
and she was crying.
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299. - That's what you remember, huh?
- Yep.
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300. You don't remember
the trips to Galveston,
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301. camping in Big Bend,
all the fun we had?
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302. Nope.
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303. - You ever get mad at your mother?
- Yeah.
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304. - You ever get mad at your brother?
- Yeah.
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305. - Yeah. You ever yell at him?
- Oh, yeah.
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306. Doesn't mean you don't love him, right?
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307. Mm.
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308. Look, the same thing happens
when you're grown up, right?
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309. You know, you get mad at people.
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310. It's not a big deal.
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311. What'd you do in Alaska?
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312. I worked on a boat for a while.
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313. Um, I tried to write some music.
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314. - Did you see any polar bears?
- No.
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315. But I saw a Kodiak bear.
It was fuckin' huge.
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316. Dad! That's 50 cents for the F-word!
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317. I'm sorry.
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318. Here, take a dollar, all right?
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319. Keep the change.
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320. You guys are gonna be seein'
a lot more of me. Okay?
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321. I missed you two real bad
while I was gone.
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322. I want you to know that.
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323. I just needed to take
some time, you know, to -
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324. Just -
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325. Your mom and me, okay -
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326. Well, your mother, okay,
is a piece of work.
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327. All right. I think you know that by now.
All right?
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328. I'm just - I'm so happy
to be with the two of you.
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329. I'm sorry about that bumper business.
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330. I'm gonna get better
at stuff like that, okay?
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331. I got that one at Dripping Springs.
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332. - And, um, my friend Rodney gave me that one.
- Yeah?
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333. - And I bought that one.
- You bought this one?
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334. - Yeah.
- You found this at Dripping Springs?
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335. - Uh-huh.
- Wow!
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336. - What else do you got?
- Well, um, these are snake vertebrae.
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337. Snake vertebrae?
That's disgusting.
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338. Mason, I don't want you collecting
snake vertebrae anymore.
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339. - Is this the feather I sent you?
- Yeah! Yeah, yeah, it is.
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340. Oh, Dad, I forgot to show you
these basketball pictures.
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341. - You're on a basketball team?
- Yeah.
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342. - Wow! Check you out.
- And these are - these are beaver claws.
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343. - Beaver claws?
- That's me.
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344. - What, you hunting beaver, huh?
- No.
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345. That's McKinney,
that's Meg, and that's Gem.
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346. - Dried Canadian grass.
- What position do you play?
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347. - Guard.
- This is dried Canadian grass.
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348. Wait, you scoring any points?
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349. - About eight or 10 a game.
- Eight or 10 a game?
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350. - That is awesome!
- Once she didn't score any, and she cried.
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351. - You cried?
- Well, only a little bit.
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352. Aw.
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353. - Hello!
- Oh, Mason, Mom's home!
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354. - Mom's home.
- All right. Mom's home.
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355. Hi! Look at this owl Daddy gave me.
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356. Isn't it cool? See, its head spins!
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357. And look at this bracelet.
It was made by Indians in Alaska.
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358. Daddy made this cool hand-carved
grizzly bear and this tiki.
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359. It's a totem.
And guess what else.
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360. We went bowling,
and I made four strikes!
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361. - Yeah, and we got to ride around in Dad's car.
- Wow.
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362. - Hey, Liv.
- Hey.
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363. I know you wanted me
to drop them off at your mom's.
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364. I just thought it'd be easier
if I brought 'em over here.
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365. Well, it really screwed up my plans.
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366. - We just wanted to show him our rooms.
- Yeah.
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367. Did you guys eat anything?
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368. Well, we had some french fries
at the bowling alley.
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369. - Did you do your homework or -
- Not yet.
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370. Can I talk to you outside for a second?
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371. Yeah. Sure.
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372. They had more than french fries.
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373. Hmm.
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374. Do you think he's gonna
spend the night?
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375. Doesn't look like it.
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376. Okay. An unconditioned stimulus,
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377. something that produces
an unlearned, involuntary,
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378. unconditioned response.
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379. Now, in Pavlov's experiment,
what was the stimulus that he used?
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380. Come on now, people.
Tough weekend? What's the deal here?
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381. Meat, right? Meat powder actually.
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382. Whatever meat powder is,
it worked on this dog, okay?
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383. Put the meat powder in there, and it produced
an unconditioned response in the dog
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384. which was salivation, all right?
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385. Now, who can give me another example
Copy !req
386. of an unconditioned stimulus response pair
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387. that happens to you every day?
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388. It's probably happening
to some of you right now.
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389. How about sex?
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390. Sure, you know, you see
an attractive member of the opposite gender,
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391. you have an automatic response,
you don't have to think about it.
Copy !req
392. Mick Jagger wrote a song about,
"Oh, when they call your name,
Copy !req
393. I salivate like a Pavlov dog."
Copy !req
394. Thank you very much.
Class dismissed.
Copy !req
395. Dr. Wellbrock.
Copy !req
396. - This is my son Mason.
- Oh.
Copy !req
397. Mason, this is Dr. Wellbrock.
Copy !req
398. Your son. See, I thought this was a boy genius
who was taking my college course.
Copy !req
399. He wasn't feeling well today,
so I thought I'd bring him with me.
Copy !req
400. Ah! No fever. It's a con job.
Copy !req
401. I can tell because I have a nine-year-old son.
He pulls this all the time.
Copy !req
402. Same kind of deal.
Copy !req
403. - Hey, you play soccer?
- Mm, no.
Copy !req
404. Neither does my boy.
He hates soccer. He likes computers.
Copy !req
405. My 11-year-old daughter loves soccer.
Go figure.
Copy !req
406. - Maybe we can get all you guys
together sometime.
- Maybe, yeah.
Copy !req
407. - Well, you ready to go?
- Yeah.
Copy !req
408. - Nice to meet you, Mason.
- Nice to meet you too.
Copy !req
409. And thanks for coming to my class.
Copy !req
410. Olivia. Nice kid.
Copy !req
411. Thanks.
Copy !req
412. So you think Grandma might be
available for a little babysitting?
Copy !req
413. Maybe.
Copy !req
414. - Really?
- Yeah.
Copy !req
415. Well, great.
Copy !req
416. Dead man, dead man, wake up.
Copy !req
417. One, two, three, four, five,
you're alive.
Copy !req
418. - My turn.
- Hey, kids, they're here!
Copy !req
419. Oh, they're home! They're home!
Copy !req
420. Hurry, hurry!
Copy !req
421. - Mom!
- Oh, they're here!
Copy !req
422. Hey, we've returned!
Copy !req
423. - Hi, Dad!
- Samantha, Mason, look! Thank you.
Copy !req
424. That's very nice.
Copy !req
425. Hi, Mom. How are you?
Copy !req
426. Mom, Mom, Mom, Mom!
Look at the sign we made!
Copy !req
427. Samantha and I made it all ourselves.
Copy !req
428. I know the boys helped you
with that a lot.
Copy !req
429. No, not at all!
Copy !req
430. That's good. Look at this.
Oh, pass out the goodies.
Copy !req
431. Don't worry. We got you
some absinthe or something.
Copy !req
432. Oh, let's pour it.
Copy !req
433. You take this big elevator up, and when we
got to the top we flew a paper airplane off.
Copy !req
434. - And what happened?
- It flew.
Copy !req
435. It flew away. Went for miles.
Went under the Arc de Triomphe.
Copy !req
436. Oh, did you guys kiss
under the Bridge of Sighs?
Copy !req
437. - Yes.
- Yes, we did.
Copy !req
438. - Hey, Mom, can we see your wedding ring?
- Oh, sure.
Copy !req
439. Wow.
Copy !req
440. Technically, that's a fancy step cut
surrounded by miniature brilliant.
Copy !req
441. - I wish we could've gone to Europe.
- Yeah.
Copy !req
442. Yeah, we'll go as a family next time.
Copy !req
443. But you didn't miss much, really.
Copy !req
444. We just stayed in the hotel room
the whole time playing video games.
Copy !req
445. - Really?
- And the hotels are really small and really old.
Copy !req
446. - Squeaky.
- Can I get you anything else?
Copy !req
447. Would you like to see a dessert menu?
Copy !req
448. I told you to put that away.
Would you put that in your purse, please?
Copy !req
449. Computer games at the table.
Copy !req
450. Yes, uh, please, another bottle of wine.
Copy !req
451. - Um, Coke.
- You know what?
Copy !req
452. Mason, you're okay with water.
Copy !req
453. No more Cokes, thank you.
Copy !req
454. How about you?
Did you finish your science project?
Copy !req
455. Not quite yet.
Copy !req
456. Did you work on it?
Did you build anything or plan anything or -
Copy !req
457. A little.
Copy !req
458. - Did he work on it at all, Mindy?
- No.
Copy !req
459. Did he sit around playing video games
with Mason the whole time?
Copy !req
460. Yeah.
Copy !req
461. Hmm.
Copy !req
462. You were supposed to finish that
by the time I got back.
Copy !req
463. Remember?
Copy !req
464. Hey.
Copy !req
465. - Grievous is the best, man.
- No, Yoda is.
Copy !req
466. Yoda, man. It's Yoda.
Copy !req
467. - He has four arms.
- Yoda!
Copy !req
468. Represent!
Copy !req
469. I hate Miss Barnsley.
Copy !req
470. Everybody's been saying she's lesbian.
Copy !req
471. She is. She hit on Stacy.
Copy !req
472. - Man, that's gross.
- Think it's true?
Copy !req
473. She's always walking in the locker room.
Copy !req
474. I think I still have a couple of those -
Copy !req
475. Hey, Paul. Tell us a joke.
Copy !req
476. Damn. Fuck. Go to hell. Ass.
Copy !req
477. - Uh! I blew you up.
- Aw, heck, man. That was not fair.
Copy !req
478. No, actually it was.
Copy !req
479. That's like the fairest thing ever.
Copy !req
480. Whatever.
Copy !req
481. Oh, once again I take you down.
Copy !req
482. - Uh -
- Three Musketeers?
Copy !req
483. First word.
Copy !req
484. Chicken?
Copy !req
485. Bird.
Copy !req
486. Second word.
Copy !req
487. Uh... hood. Big hair.
Copy !req
488. - Robin Hood.
- Ah!
Copy !req
489. - Whoo!
- Brilliant child!
Copy !req
490. Good one.
Copy !req
491. Second word.
Copy !req
492. Blanket?
Hey, you can't use props.
Copy !req
493. Hey, hey, hey, hey. Cut it out.
Copy !req
494. Judges speak. No props. No props.
Copy !req
495. Can't use props. You can do it
without that. Think, think, think.
Copy !req
496. Um, bunch.
Copy !req
497. - Is it like -
- The Gathered?
Copy !req
498. Um, folded.
Copy !req
499. Messing around with a blanket.
Wrinkling it.
Copy !req
500. A Wrinkle in Time!
Copy !req
501. "What are the guards at Azkaban?"
Copy !req
502. Dementors?
Copy !req
503. I-I -
Copy !req
504. Front of the line, are you ready?
Copy !req
505. Count down with me,
ladies and gentlemen!
Copy !req
506. Ten!
Copy !req
507. Nine! Eight!
Copy !req
508. Seven! Six!
Copy !req
509. Five! Four! Three!
Copy !req
510. Two! One!
Copy !req
511. Let's go!
Copy !req
512. Thank you.
Copy !req
513. Thanks.
Copy !req
514. - All righty. There we go.
- Yay!
Copy !req
515. No, no, no, no. Back up and take
a practice swing first, remember?
Copy !req
516. Nice and easy.
Sweep the floor. Sweep the floor.
Copy !req
517. That's good.
Copy !req
518. Don't swing too hard, Randy.
He always swings too hard.
Copy !req
519. Hey, all right! Very good!
Copy !req
520. Back your feet up a little bit.
Copy !req
521. Yeah, like that.
Now you're gonna hit it straighter.
Copy !req
522. All right. Go up and hit it.
That's good.
Copy !req
523. Nice slow swing
is gonna be better for you.
Copy !req
524. All right!
Copy !req
525. I don't know, man.
You must've been -
Copy !req
526. See, your feet are too open, Randy.
Copy !req
527. Nice and natural.
Copy !req
528. Yes! Go!
Copy !req
529. All right! Give me five.
Copy !req
530. Good putt, Son. Good putt.
Copy !req
531. Did you see that, Randy?
That's the way to do it.
Copy !req
532. All right. Birdie putt.
Copy !req
533. Goddamn it. Son of a bitch.
Copy !req
534. Get my clubs, would you?
Get the ball.
Copy !req
535. This is just in case
we have guests this weekend.
Copy !req
536. He always says that, but we never have a guest.
Copy !req
537. Samantha, I think
I heard your dad pull up.
Copy !req
538. - Oh, all right.
- You guys finish your chores?
Copy !req
539. Not quite. Just about.
Copy !req
540. How about the dusting, Sam?
Copy !req
541. I haven't done that yet.
Copy !req
542. Well, I saw you working
on your art project.
Copy !req
543. You had time to finish
your little art project,
Copy !req
544. but you didn't have time
to finish your chores?
Copy !req
545. - I thought we talked about that.
- Dad, it's fine.
Copy !req
546. - I can finish the dusting.
- No, it's not fine, Mindy.
Copy !req
547. You have your own chores to do,
and Sam has hers to do. Huh?
Copy !req
548. It's simple.
Copy !req
549. Poor choice there, Sam.
Copy !req
550. And hurry up.
Copy !req
551. Mason!
Copy !req
552. Your dad's here.
Copy !req
553. You guys aren't settin'
any speed records, are you?
Copy !req
554. What'd you do, get about half done?
Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey.
Copy !req
555. - So, did you finish?
- No.
Copy !req
556. Is the job complete?
Copy !req
557. So, what are you gonna
be doing tomorrow?
Copy !req
558. - Same thing, right?
- Yeah.
Copy !req
559. Okay. Go.
Copy !req
560. Bye, Mom.
Copy !req
561. Bye, babe. I love you.
Copy !req
562. - Bye, Mama.
- Bye, honey.
Copy !req
563. - Have fun with your dad.
- Just a minute, Mason.
Copy !req
564. The boys didn't finish raking the leaves.
Copy !req
565. Samantha did not finish dusting.
Copy !req
566. So tomorrow, when they come home,
Copy !req
567. instead of swimming and all
the other little stuff that they wanna do,
Copy !req
568. - they're gonna do their chores, right?
- Right.
Copy !req
569. Okay, guys, you had this conversation.
You understand?
Copy !req
570. Tomorrow? Okay.
Copy !req
571. Thank you. I just wanted you
to back me up on that
Copy !req
572. so I'm not the only one
yelling at 'em all the time.
Copy !req
573. Okay, I back you up.
You guys got that?
Copy !req
574. We all agree. Everybody agrees, right?
Tomorrow, chores?
Copy !req
575. Well, they don't hear it.
Goes in one ear and out the other.
Copy !req
576. But, Dad, I mean, dusting is pointless.
Copy !req
577. It's not pointless.
You just don't like to do it.
Copy !req
578. But I mean, who dusts anymore?
Copy !req
579. You do when we ask you to!
Copy !req
580. And don't - Olivia, don't let her back-talk me
in front of the other kids, please.
Copy !req
581. - Thank you.
- Samantha, please.
Copy !req
582. Whatever!
Copy !req
583. Bye-bye.
Have a wonderful weekend.
Copy !req
584. Okay. Bye, guys. Love you.
Copy !req
585. I'm sorry,
but I thought we talked about it.
Copy !req
586. You have to draw a line,
you have to back it up.
Copy !req
587. Okay. It's just you have
so many lines, Bill.
Copy !req
588. Everything's a line.
Copy !req
589. - Hey, Randy. Hey, you guys.
- Bye. Bye.
Copy !req
590. Hey, you two. How you doin'?
Copy !req
591. - Shotgun.
- Ooh!
Copy !req
592. Here, let me get this bag here.
Copy !req
593. - You doin' okay, darlin'?
- Yeah.
Copy !req
594. - All right. What about you, cowboy?
- Pretty good.
Copy !req
595. Yeah?
Copy !req
596. All right. Let's roll!
Copy !req
597. You guys ready for the big game?
Copy !req
598. Yeah.
Copy !req
599. Sam, who are the Astros
playing tonight?
Copy !req
600. - I don't know.
- The Milwaukee Brewers.
Copy !req
601. Get to know 'em.
Get to hate 'em.
Copy !req
602. Mase. How you been, huh?
How was your week?
Copy !req
603. - Pretty good.
- Yeah?
Copy !req
604. - What you been up to?
- Not much.
Copy !req
605. No? You still hangin' with that kid Joe?
Copy !req
606. - Yeah.
- He still your best friend?
Copy !req
607. Yeah, I guess.
Copy !req
608. Okay. How 'bout you?
How was your week?
Copy !req
609. - Fine.
- What you been up to?
Copy !req
610. Nothin' really.
Copy !req
611. You, um - You still working
on that sculpture project?
Copy !req
612. Yeah. Almost finished.
Copy !req
613. - What's it of?
- Nothing.
Copy !req
614. All right. No, no, no, no, no, no.
Copy !req
615. No, that is not how we are going
to talk to one another.
Copy !req
616. All right? I will not be that guy.
Copy !req
617. You cannot put me in that category.
Copy !req
618. The biological father
I spend every other week with
Copy !req
619. that I make polite conversation while
he drives me places and buys me shit.
Copy !req
620. No. Talk to me.
Copy !req
621. Samantha, how was your week?
Copy !req
622. "I don't know, Dad. It was kinda tough.
Copy !req
623. Billy and Ellen broke up,
and Ellen's kinda mad at me
Copy !req
624. 'cause she saw me talking to Billy
in the cafeteria.
Copy !req
625. Remember that sculpture
I was workin' on?
Copy !req
626. Well, it was a unicorn, and the horn
broke off, so now it's a zebra, okay?
Copy !req
627. But I still think I'm gonna get an 'A."'
Right?
Copy !req
628. Mason, uh, how was your week?
Copy !req
629. "Well, Dad, you know,
it was kinda tough.
Copy !req
630. Joey's kind of a jerk. Actually,
he stole some cigarettes from his mom.
Copy !req
631. He wanted me to smoke 'em,
but I said no
Copy !req
632. 'cause I knew what a hard time
you had quitting smoking, Dad."
Copy !req
633. How 'bout that? Is that so hard?
Copy !req
634. Dad, these questions
are kind of hard to answer.
Copy !req
635. What is so hard to answer about
what sculpture are you making?
Copy !req
636. - It's abstract.
- Okay. Okay, that's good.
Copy !req
637. See, I didn't know you were
even interested in abstract art.
Copy !req
638. I'm not. They make us do it.
Copy !req
639. But, Dad, I mean, why is it all on us though?
You know, what about you?
Copy !req
640. How was your week? Who do you
hang out with? Do you have a girlfriend?
Copy !req
641. - What have you been up to?
- I see your point.
Copy !req
642. So we should just let it happen
more natural, right?
Copy !req
643. That's what you're sayin'.
Copy !req
644. Okay. That's what we'll do, starting now.
Copy !req
645. Hey, check this out.
Copy !req
646. That would be, uh -
That would be a Magnificent Owl.
Copy !req
647. Caligo Atreus.
Copy !req
648. What's that one? Look at this.
Copy !req
649. - Whoa.
- What kind is that?
Copy !req
650. That looks like a Zebra Longwing.
Copy !req
651. - All right.
- Cool.
Copy !req
652. This one's incredible.
That's the owl one, right?
Copy !req
653. Yeah. Magnificent Owl.
Copy !req
654. I think he went pee-pee on you, bud.
Copy !req
655. One, two, three, four, five.
Copy !req
656. Ah! Ah! Get away from me!
Copy !req
657. Get away from me!
Copy !req
658. Hey, hey, hey!
Copy !req
659. Yo, Mase, look at me here.
Copy !req
660. Make a diamond with your hands, right?
Fingers and thumbs.
Copy !req
661. Keep your hands soft. Hey, Sam.
Copy !req
662. Very nice. That's how
you want to catch it - just like that.
Copy !req
663. Even when you're runnin', that's what
you're thinkin' about - that diamond.
Copy !req
664. That diamond and soft hands.
Copy !req
665. There it is.
Copy !req
666. Down!
Copy !req
667. Set!
Copy !req
668. Hut!
Copy !req
669. No, no, no, no, no!
Copy !req
670. Dad! Dad!
Copy !req
671. Don't let her get -
No, no, no, no, no!
Copy !req
672. Let's go, Roger!
Copy !req
673. - Dad?
- Get him out.
Copy !req
674. Strike! That's it, Roger!
Copy !req
675. - Yeah!
- Guy's incredible.
Copy !req
676. He's unhittable this year.
Copy !req
677. Now just so you know,
what we're watching here is history.
Copy !req
678. Now you see this guy out here?
Copy !req
679. This dude is like 43 years old,
and he's strikin' out guys half his age.
Copy !req
680. - Come on, Roger!
- This guy's ERA is 1.47. Can you believe that?
Copy !req
681. Now if the Astros could just get a few runs,
maybe we'd win a game.
Copy !req
682. Dad, do you have a job?
Copy !req
683. Why would you ask me that?
Copy !req
684. I don't know. Mom wanted to know,
and I didn't know what the answer was.
Copy !req
685. Mom wanted to know.
Well, you can tell Mom
Copy !req
686. that I just happen to have passed
my second actuarial exam, all right?
Copy !req
687. So... you tell her that.
Copy !req
688. - How's she doing?
- Great.
Copy !req
689. - Is she finishing school?
- Yep, all A's.
Copy !req
690. All A's, huh?
Like mother, like daughter, right?
Copy !req
691. He got that! It's out of here!
Copy !req
692. Oh! Oh!
Copy !req
693. - Yeah!
- Yay!
Copy !req
694. Yeah! Mason!
Copy !req
695. Yes!
Copy !req
696. Yeah!
Copy !req
697. Yeah!
Copy !req
698. - Hey!
- Yeah!
Copy !req
699. Hey!
Copy !req
700. - Hi, Jimmy.
- Hey, Samantha.
Copy !req
701. - Hey, what's up, Jimmy?
- What's goin' on, Mason, man?
Copy !req
702. - Astros won.
- You went to the game?
Copy !req
703. What, I'm the only one with any arms around
here? Nobody else can carry anything?
Copy !req
704. - Help their old man out.
- What you watching?
Copy !req
705. Oh, come on, Jimmy, man!
You knew the kids were comin' this weekend.
Copy !req
706. Can't you just help me out
a little bit, just -
Copy !req
707. - I'm sorry, muffin.
- Don't "muffin" me, all right?
Copy !req
708. Don't put me in that position.
I'm not your fucking Tony Randall.
Copy !req
709. Dad, it's always a mess.
Copy !req
710. It was not a mess this morning, okay?
Copy !req
711. I mowed the lawn.
Copy !req
712. Oh, yeah? Great.
Copy !req
713. Oh, come on, man!
Turn this shit off. Give me that thing.
Copy !req
714. - Did you watch the game?
- No.
Copy !req
715. Lane won it with a three-run homer.
Copy !req
716. It was beautiful, wasn't it?
Copy !req
717. Sam lost her mind.
Copy !req
718. She's a huge Astros fan.
Copy !req
719. Sure.
Copy !req
720. - You brush your teeth?
- What?
Copy !req
721. Did you brush your teeth?
Copy !req
722. Oh, yeah. Yeah.
Copy !req
723. - You gonna fall asleep with
those things in your head?
- Maybe.
Copy !req
724. - Yeah, well, try not to, all right?
- Okay.
Copy !req
725. - You want me to turn off the light?
- Sure.
Copy !req
726. - Good night, Sam.
- Good night, Dad.
Copy !req
727. - Good night, Sam.
- Good night, Jimmy.
Copy !req
728. Hey.
Copy !req
729. - That was a fun day, right?
- Yeah, it was. Sorry.
Copy !req
730. - Why?
- That Mason had to be there, you know?
Copy !req
731. - Good night.
- Good night.
Copy !req
732. Dad?
Copy !req
733. There's no, like, real magic
in the world, right?
Copy !req
734. What do you mean?
Copy !req
735. You know, like elves and stuff.
Copy !req
736. People just made that up.
Copy !req
737. I don't know.
Copy !req
738. I mean, what makes you think that elves are
any more magical than something like a whale?
Copy !req
739. You know what I mean?
What if I told you a story
Copy !req
740. about how underneath the ocean,
Copy !req
741. there was this giant sea mammal
Copy !req
742. that used sonar and sang songs,
Copy !req
743. and it was so big that its heart
was the size of a car
Copy !req
744. and you could crawl
through the arteries?
Copy !req
745. I mean, you'd think
that was pretty magical, right?
Copy !req
746. Yeah.
Copy !req
747. But, like, right this second,
Copy !req
748. there's, like, no elves
in the world, right?
Copy !req
749. No. Technically, no elves.
Copy !req
750. - Love you, guys.
- See you, Dad.
Copy !req
751. All right. Be well.
Copy !req
752. - Sam, I'll see you next weekend.
- All right. Oh, yeah, that's right.
Copy !req
753. - What?
- Suzie has a birthday party next Saturday.
Copy !req
754. - A sleepover?
- Yeah.
Copy !req
755. - All right. I'll talk to your mom about it.
- Bye, Dad.
Copy !req
756. - Don't worry about it, okay? Have a great week.
- Had a great time.
Copy !req
757. Oh, man.
Copy !req
758. How do you guys
not know how to do this?
Copy !req
759. I'll make you some bookmarks.
Just a second.
Copy !req
760. Choose - She looks nice.
Copy !req
761. Randy, Mason,
Dad wants you guys downstairs.
Copy !req
762. - Why?
- You're getting haircuts.
Copy !req
763. This is gonna look
so much better.
Copy !req
764. You're gonna look like a man
instead of like a little girl.
Copy !req
765. You're takin' the eyebrows
off next, right, Byron?
Copy !req
766. Mason, we're leavin'.
Copy !req
767. You're not sick.
Copy !req
768. - Bye, guys.
- Bye, Mom.
Copy !req
769. - Where's Mason?
- He doesn't feel too good.
Copy !req
770. I don't think he's going to school.
Copy !req
771. He's totally faking it.
Copy !req
772. Bye.
Copy !req
773. Mason, what's goin' on?
Copy !req
774. - I don't feel good.
- Yeah, your head feels fine.
Copy !req
775. So get your ass out of bed.
Copy !req
776. I'm gonna drive you to school.
You got five minutes, and don't make me late.
Copy !req
777. I mean, he didn't even ask.
He just cut it.
Copy !req
778. I mean, it's my hair.
Copy !req
779. No wonder you were angry.
I'd be angry too.
Copy !req
780. I look like a Martian now.
Copy !req
781. Honey, you know what?
I'm gonna talk to him about it later, okay?
Copy !req
782. Yeah, I tried to call you,
but you didn't answer your phone.
Copy !req
783. I'm so sorry.
Copy !req
784. I've been so busy with school.
Copy !req
785. Hey.
Copy !req
786. For what it's worth, it's hair,
and it will grow back.
Copy !req
787. Now I can see your pretty eyes
and your foxy face.
Copy !req
788. Why'd you even marry him?
He's such a jerk.
Copy !req
789. Well, Bill has his good qualities.
Copy !req
790. You know, nobody's perfect.
Copy !req
791. And now we have a family.
Copy !req
792. We already had a family.
Copy !req
793. I pledge allegiance to the flag
of the United States of America,
Copy !req
794. and to the republic for which it stands,
Copy !req
795. one nation, under God, indivisible,
Copy !req
796. with liberty and justice for all.
Copy !req
797. Please join me in the Texas pledge.
Copy !req
798. Honor the Texas flag.
Copy !req
799. I pledge allegiance to thee, Texas,
Copy !req
800. one and indivisible.
Copy !req
801. Thank you. You may be seated.
Copy !req
802. All right.
Copy !req
803. All right, class, as you know,
Copy !req
804. we've been working on
our mythology projects.
Copy !req
805. We're gonna be writing papers
about gods and goddesses.
Copy !req
806. We've listed those gods and goddesses
here on the board.
Copy !req
807. We added a couple of monsters for some
of you who might be interested in that.
Copy !req
808. You're gonna write your essay
about your god and goddess.
Copy !req
809. And to make sure
that you cover everything,
Copy !req
810. let's make sure that we do
all of these things right here.
Copy !req
811. First of all, we need to name
your god or goddess
Copy !req
812. and you need to include
who, what, when, where,
Copy !req
813. why and how.
Copy !req
814. So make sure that you cover all those things
when you're writing your essay.
Copy !req
815. There's a bump right there.
Copy !req
816. - See you later, guys.
- Yeah.
Copy !req
817. Mom, are you okay?
Copy !req
818. - What happened?
- No! Go in the house!
Copy !req
819. Go! Go in the house!
Go in the house!
Copy !req
820. Your mother had a little accident.
Copy !req
821. Now she's being dramatic.
Copy !req
822. Get off the fucking floor,
Olivia, for Christ's sake.
Copy !req
823. Ah.
Copy !req
824. I'm having a drink with my dinner.
Copy !req
825. Anybody else have a problem with that?
Copy !req
826. Hmm? Samantha?
Copy !req
827. No.
Copy !req
828. - Mindy?
- No.
Copy !req
829. I didn't think so.
Copy !req
830. Ah.
Copy !req
831. You don't like me much, do you, Mason?
Copy !req
832. That's okay. I don't like me either.
Copy !req
833. Think that's funny, huh?
Copy !req
834. You think that's fuckin' funny?
Copy !req
835. What's the matter?
You feeling a little left out?
Copy !req
836. Oh!
Copy !req
837. Clean it up, goddamn it! Clean it up.
Copy !req
838. - Bill! Stop it!
- Clean this up, goddamn it!
Copy !req
839. I hate squash!
Copy !req
840. on the streets!
Copy !req
841. Pearl, I'm gonna pay you.
I'm workin' three jobs now.
Copy !req
842. How many times
can you watch that, Mason?
Copy !req
843. - It's funny.
- I'm drivin' a cab.
Copy !req
844. I'm inside with my buddy right now,
goin' over my résumé.
Copy !req
845. I'm gonna smack you.
Copy !req
846. Okay, you know what?
You need to relax.
Copy !req
847. Why do you need your money
so fast? Come on!
Copy !req
848. - Has he ever gotten this bad before?
- No.
Copy !req
849. But he's yelled a lot.
Copy !req
850. Yeah, but he hasn't thrown
and broken stuff.
Copy !req
851. Yeah, you're drunk. I knew it.
Copy !req
852. - You're already drunk.
- I'm not drunk.
Copy !req
853. Give me your cell phones.
Copy !req
854. So nobody talked to her, huh?
Copy !req
855. - Mason?
- No.
Copy !req
856. - Mindy?
- No.
Copy !req
857. I believe you.
Copy !req
858. - Samantha?
- No.
Copy !req
859. I didn't talk to her.
She left a message.
Copy !req
860. - What'd she say?
- Nothing much.
Copy !req
861. What did she say?
Copy !req
862. She said she'd be back later.
Copy !req
863. And that's all?
"I'll be back later." Click?
Copy !req
864. She said, "Stay in your rooms.
I'll be back later."
Copy !req
865. Be back later. Stay in your rooms.
And that's all, hmm?
Copy !req
866. Yeah.
Copy !req
867. - Where is she?
- I don't know.
Copy !req
868. - Where is she?
- She didn't say.
Copy !req
869. All right. Everybody, get in the car.
Copy !req
870. Hurry up! Get in the car!
Copy !req
871. It's still not working.
Copy !req
872. Oh, bullshit.
Copy !req
873. She took it all.
Copy !req
874. All right, Randy. Go cash this.
Copy !req
875. Tell 'em I'm not feeling well or something.
Copy !req
876. I don't know.
Copy !req
877. Mason, go with him.
Copy !req
878. Here. Here's my ID.
Copy !req
879. Hi. Good afternoon, fellas.
What can I do for you today?
Copy !req
880. Now what's this?
Copy !req
881. Can't read this.
Copy !req
882. Hey! This isn't you. Who is this?
Copy !req
883. It's our... dad.
Copy !req
884. - He's not feeling well.
- Oh! Hey!
Copy !req
885. Yeah, I know him.
Copy !req
886. Okay, here we go.
Copy !req
887. 500 bucks. One, two, three, four,
Copy !req
888. 500 bucks.
Copy !req
889. All right? Don't forget your dad's ID.
Copy !req
890. Now take care of your dad now, son.
You only got the one.
Copy !req
891. Damn it.
Copy !req
892. Get outta the way! Jesus Christ.
Copy !req
893. God.
Copy !req
894. - Calm down!
- What the hell!
Copy !req
895. Samantha! Mason!
Copy !req
896. Samantha!
Copy !req
897. Where the hell have you been?
Copy !req
898. - I'm leaving you, Bill. We're moving out.
- I doubt that.
Copy !req
899. Samantha, Mason! Come down!
Copy !req
900. No. Mm-mmm. Don't think so.
Oh, who's this?
Copy !req
901. I'm not here for you.
Copy !req
902. Oh, really? Oh, I know.
You're here to protect my wife from me.
Copy !req
903. - Well, thank you so much, you two.
- Okay, stay back!
Copy !req
904. - Behave!
- Why don't you come inside here, huh?
Copy !req
905. Come inside here.
Where the hell are you goin'?
Copy !req
906. - Get your ass upstairs.
You're not goin' anywhere.
- Stop!
Copy !req
907. - Come on.
- Where the hell do you think you're going?
Copy !req
908. Get upstairs! What the hell -
Nobody's going anywhere, goddamn it.
Copy !req
909. - Stop it!
- No, goddamn it!
Copy !req
910. - Don't touch my kids!
- All right, take 'em. Go on.
Copy !req
911. - Go on.
- Don't touch them!
Copy !req
912. - Well, take 'em then! Just take 'em!
- Get in the car!
Copy !req
913. Go!
Copy !req
914. Get upstairs!
Copy !req
915. - Olivia!
- Seat belts! Put your seat belts on.
Copy !req
916. Where are we going?
Copy !req
917. We're going to stay with Carol
and her family for a while.
Copy !req
918. Don't look back.
Copy !req
919. It's gonna be okay.
Copy !req
920. Hey, Lee, Mason. Guys, when you
want to take a break, here's a snack.
Copy !req
921. Hey, Abby. Why don't you
come help me with this?
Copy !req
922. Why couldn't Randy and Mindy
come with us?
Copy !req
923. I'm not their legal guardian, honey.
Copy !req
924. That would be kidnapping.
I can't just -
Copy !req
925. Well, what's gonna happen to them?
Copy !req
926. What happens when their legal guardian
is dangerous and abusive?
Copy !req
927. You know, I don't know, honey.
Copy !req
928. I called their mom.
I called the Child Protective Services.
Copy !req
929. I have you and your brother.
Copy !req
930. We're in a dangerous situation.
You're my responsibility.
Copy !req
931. Are we ever gonna see them again?
Copy !req
932. I don't know.
Copy !req
933. I hope so.
Copy !req
934. How much longer
are we gonna be here?
Copy !req
935. Not long. We're -
Copy !req
936. I don't - I don't know.
Copy !req
937. I don't have the answer to everything.
Copy !req
938. Hey, listen. We are happy
to have you here as long as you want.
Copy !req
939. As long as you need.
Copy !req
940. - This is fun for us, isn't it?
- Mm-hmm.
Copy !req
941. Yeah, it's like having a big sister,
like having a brother.
Copy !req
942. We're gonna help out, right?
Copy !req
943. - You're not even gonna know we're here.
- Okay.
Copy !req
944. Mom, this is awful.
Copy !req
945. You're dumping me
in some parking lot of the school
Copy !req
946. where I don't even know anyone.
Copy !req
947. I'm leaving all my friends,
and I didn't even get to say good-bye!
Copy !req
948. - I don't know where to go!
- Samantha, you go right through that door.
Copy !req
949. The office is right there.
They're expecting you.
Copy !req
950. They're gonna give you your schedule.
Here's your lunch money.
Copy !req
951. I will pick you up right here at 3:30.
Copy !req
952. I'm wearing dirty clothes
Copy !req
953. because you wouldn't
even let us get our stuff!
Copy !req
954. We don't even have a place to live!
Copy !req
955. This sucks!
Copy !req
956. Samantha! I'm doing the best I can!
Copy !req
957. And you're right! It sucks!
Copy !req
958. But it doesn't suck half as much as having
a drunk fool slam your head against a wall!
Copy !req
959. So cut your horseshit attitude!
Put your seat belt on.
Copy !req
960. You know, if you need anything,
I'm in Room 112, right?
Copy !req
961. Okay.
Copy !req
962. This is Mrs. Darby's room.
Copy !req
963. Oh, honey, it's gonna be okay.
Okay?
Copy !req
964. Mom.
Copy !req
965. That concert was off the hook.
Copy !req
966. I mean, when he smashed that board
against that microphone,
Copy !req
967. I swear, I thought of -
Copy !req
968. - Are you Mason?
- Yeah.
Copy !req
969. Hi. I'm Mrs. Darby.
I'm glad to meet you.
Copy !req
970. Why don't you sit here?
Copy !req
971. - Kenny, off.
- Yes, ma'am.
Copy !req
972. Kenny.
Copy !req
973. This is Mason, and I want you
to show him around today, okay?
Copy !req
974. - Got it.
- Okay.
Copy !req
975. Hey, dude. Welcome to the suck.
Copy !req
976. Everybody, listen up.
Copy !req
977. We have a new student
joining us today.
Copy !req
978. His name is Mason.
He's sitting in the back row.
Copy !req
979. Kenny's gonna be his buddy,
but I want each one of you
Copy !req
980. to take the time today
to introduce yourselves
Copy !req
981. and welcome him to school.
Copy !req
982. Okay? Right? Let's get started.
Copy !req
983. What?
Copy !req
984. Oh, hi. Can I put an Obama sign
in your yard?
Copy !req
985. Do I look like
a Barack Hussein Obama supporter?
Copy !req
986. No.
Copy !req
987. This is private property. Get off.
Copy !req
988. I could shoot you.
Copy !req
989. What a dick.
Copy !req
990. He had a Confederate flag on his house.
Copy !req
991. Love it!
Young Obama supporters out on the trail.
Copy !req
992. This is great. Are you doing this
through your school?
Copy !req
993. - Um, our dad's a big supporter.
- Oh, that's great.
Copy !req
994. I mean, we just got to pull together
to get this win, right?
Copy !req
995. - Yeah.
- I just love him so much.
Copy !req
996. I have these dreams where I'm just kissing him
'cause I just love him so much!
Copy !req
997. - He's so cute, isn't he?
- Yeah.
Copy !req
998. I made these T-shirts for my kids.
Copy !req
999. "My mama's for Obama."
Copy !req
1000. - Do you like it? It's good, right?
- Yeah.
Copy !req
1001. - Thanks for the sign.
- No problem.
Copy !req
1002. Hey, all right! Looks good.
Copy !req
1003. How many you got left, two?
All right, all right. We're done.
Copy !req
1004. Let's get out of here.
Come on, Sam.
Copy !req
1005. - Go get that McCain sign, would you?
- What?
Copy !req
1006. Get the McCain sign.
Rip it up. Come on.
Copy !req
1007. Get it! Get it! Go, go, go!
Copy !req
1008. Good job, good job.
Copy !req
1009. I'm proud of you, Son.
Copy !req
1010. You guys are gonna get us arrested.
Copy !req
1011. I'm a patriot, all right?
Sometimes in this life, you got to fight.
Copy !req
1012. And what is it that you do at these parties?
Copy !req
1013. I don't know.
Talk, dance, listen to music.
Copy !req
1014. Uh-huh.
And that's more fun to you
Copy !req
1015. than going camping with your brother
and your father, who love you?
Copy !req
1016. Yes. Sorry.
Copy !req
1017. Wow. Is there gonna be alcohol there?
Copy !req
1018. Probably not.
Maybe some of the seniors.
Copy !req
1019. Mm-hmm.
I know what this party is.
Copy !req
1020. The parents are out of town, right?
Copy !req
1021. Somebody's scored a keg.
Copy !req
1022. You guys are gonna have a good time,
trash the whole house.
Copy !req
1023. - Right? Am I right?
- No. No, Dad.
Copy !req
1024. - Amy's really responsible.
- Mm-hmm.
Copy !req
1025. - Who's gonna be there?
- Marie, Christine, Amy. Everyone.
Copy !req
1026. Is, uh - Is that guy on your Facebook page -
Is he gonna be there?
Copy !req
1027. Who?
Copy !req
1028. Come on. The guy that has got
his arm wrapped around you
Copy !req
1029. with his hair over his eyes.
Copy !req
1030. - Garret?
- Garret.
Copy !req
1031. Is that his name? All right.
Is Garret gonna be there?
Copy !req
1032. Probably.
Copy !req
1033. Probably. Uh-huh. You see?
Copy !req
1034. I learn more about her
from her Facebook page
Copy !req
1035. than I do from
our scintillating conversation.
Copy !req
1036. - Is he your boyfriend?
- Kind of.
Copy !req
1037. Have you met him?
Has he been around the house?
Copy !req
1038. - Sometimes.
- Sometime-s? "S"?
Copy !req
1039. You have a boyfriend. Wow.
Copy !req
1040. - Have you heard of Sarah Palin?
- Yes.
Copy !req
1041. What's the one thing you know about
Sarah Palin's 17-year-old daughter?
Copy !req
1042. - She's pregnant?
- That's right.
Copy !req
1043. What is the one thing
that you are not going to be
Copy !req
1044. in a couple of years
when you turn 17?
Copy !req
1045. - Pregnant?
- That's right!
Copy !req
1046. Now, what are the two ways
that you can achieve that goal?
Copy !req
1047. First is
Copy !req
1048. not have any sex, okay?
Copy !req
1049. That's the first way.
Just not engage in that.
Copy !req
1050. That did not work out very well
for your mother and me.
Copy !req
1051. - What's the second? Where are you going?
- Bathroom.
Copy !req
1052. You don't have to go to the bathroom.
Sit down.
Copy !req
1053. Just sit down.
Copy !req
1054. What's the second way?
Copy !req
1055. Huh? Has your mother talked
to you guys about this stuff?
Copy !req
1056. - Oh, Dad!
- Come on.
Copy !req
1057. Has she talked to you
about contraception?
Copy !req
1058. Huh? What, has she - Condoms?
Copy !req
1059. - Has she talked about that?
- Dad, please.
Copy !req
1060. - What? Does Garret have a condom -
- Oh, God!
Copy !req
1061. - What? What? Come on, Sam.
- Dad!
Copy !req
1062. We have to be able to talk about this.
Come on. We do.
Copy !req
1063. We can do it.
Just stay with me here, all right?
Copy !req
1064. It's as hard for me as it is for you.
Copy !req
1065. But seriously, I read in an article
in the paper the other day
Copy !req
1066. that said although US teenagers
are not the most sexually active,
Copy !req
1067. we have the highest rate
of teenage pregnancy, okay?
Copy !req
1068. - Hey. What's goin' on?
- Oh, hey, Tammy. How you doin'?
Copy !req
1069. - Nice to see you.
- Oh, yeah. Good to see you.
Copy !req
1070. - Um, Tammy, this is my daughter Samantha.
- Hey, Samantha.
Copy !req
1071. And this is Mason Junior right here.
Tammy.
Copy !req
1072. - Mason Junior.
- Say hi.
Copy !req
1073. - Hi.
- Hi, Mason. Nice to meet you.
Copy !req
1074. - Heard a lot about you guys.
- What are you doing here?
Copy !req
1075. I'm just here with some friends.
Copy !req
1076. - Oh, wow.
- Yeah.
Copy !req
1077. - What are you guys up to?
- We're goin' camping.
Copy !req
1078. Well, no.
This one is not going camping.
Copy !req
1079. - This one is going to a party.
- Oh. Fun.
Copy !req
1080. We - the men - are going camping.
Copy !req
1081. Boys are going camping.
All right. Very nice.
Copy !req
1082. Well, uh, are we still on for tomorrow?
Copy !req
1083. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I'll drop him off at 7:00,
and then I'll just call you.
Copy !req
1084. - All right?
- Okay. Great.
Copy !req
1085. It was really nice meeting you both.
Take care.
Copy !req
1086. - Talk to you soon. Bye.
- I'll see you.
Copy !req
1087. Don't - Don't look at me
like that, all right?
Copy !req
1088. I just - Look, just to
finish the point, okay?
Copy !req
1089. I was 23 when your mom had you, all right?
So was she, all right?
Copy !req
1090. We didn't put ourselves
in the best position to be great parents.
Copy !req
1091. And I wish that - I wish I were
a better parent to you guys, all right?
Copy !req
1092. And I-I hope that you
can learn from my mistakes.
Copy !req
1093. Okay? So wear a condom, okay?
Copy !req
1094. - Oh!
- Or get Garret. I don't know.
Copy !req
1095. Whatever.
Copy !req
1096. Now, listen to this song, all right?
Copy !req
1097. It's straight up, the lyrics, and it's
a straight-up old school country song.
Copy !req
1098. Listen to the production.
Copy !req
1099. The production's like, uh -
like Abbey Road or something.
Copy !req
1100. You know, his old woman's gone.
Straight up.
Copy !req
1101. Yeah, I think she's about
to get her master's degree.
Copy !req
1102. - Well, then she's gonna start
applying for teaching jobs?
- I think she already has.
Copy !req
1103. - Really? Where?
- All over.
Copy !req
1104. - All over Texas?
- Yeah.
Copy !req
1105. Well, if you got to move, you got to move,
you know? It's no big deal.
Copy !req
1106. We can handle that.
I'll still come get you every other weekend.
Copy !req
1107. I mean, unless she moves
500 miles away or something.
Copy !req
1108. It'll just be a little more car time.
No big deal.
Copy !req
1109. - I'm just kinda sick of moving.
- Well, I bet you are.
Copy !req
1110. But you never know.
I mean, I might have to move, right?
Copy !req
1111. I'm working for
this insurance company now.
Copy !req
1112. These places get bought and sold
all the time.
Copy !req
1113. You know, we'll just roll with it.
Copy !req
1114. I thought you were a musician.
Copy !req
1115. I am, but... life is expensive, you know?
Copy !req
1116. Guy's got to be responsible.
Copy !req
1117. What do you think? Hey! You -
Copy !req
1118. Oh, you punk kid!
Copy !req
1119. You got no respect!
Copy !req
1120. You know that redhead
at the bowling alley?
Copy !req
1121. Sure. What about her?
Copy !req
1122. Do you know her well?
Copy !req
1123. Uh, you know,
we've hung out a little bit.
Copy !req
1124. Is she your girlfriend?
Copy !req
1125. How do you mean?
Copy !req
1126. Like, have you kissed her?
Copy !req
1127. Um -
Copy !req
1128. Yeah, yeah. I've kissed her.
Copy !req
1129. What about you? You got a girlfriend?
Copy !req
1130. Sort of.
Copy !req
1131. Really? Have you, uh -
Have you kissed her?
Copy !req
1132. Not really.
Copy !req
1133. Yeah. What have you done?
Copy !req
1134. - We talked on the phone.
- Oh, yeah?
Copy !req
1135. - How'd that go?
- Pretty terrible.
Copy !req
1136. Yeah?
Why?
Copy !req
1137. Well, when we're at school,
we got plenty to talk about,
Copy !req
1138. but when we're alone or on the phone,
it's like we have nothing in common.
Copy !req
1139. Nothin'?
Copy !req
1140. She's not interested
in music or video games or -
Copy !req
1141. - Three best movies this summer.
- Right.
Copy !req
1142. Tropic Thunder, Dark Knight
and Pineapple Express.
Copy !req
1143. - Yeah, what about 'em?
- She said they all sucked.
Copy !req
1144. - Okay. What's she interested in?
- I don't know.
Copy !req
1145. - Goin' to the mall with her stupid friends.
- All right.
Copy !req
1146. - Well, is she cute? Watch your step there.
- Yeah.
Copy !req
1147. Yeah? All right.
Well, here's what you do. All right?
Copy !req
1148. First off, you got to
ask her a lot of questions.
Copy !req
1149. Then you have to listen
to the answers, all right?
Copy !req
1150. Actually be interested in her.
Copy !req
1151. If you can do those things, you're gonna
be light-years ahead of all the other guys.
Copy !req
1152. Okay, this is the best s'more
I ever made in my life.
Copy !req
1153. - Dad.
- This is absolute peak. Look at this.
Copy !req
1154. - Ah, that's just perfect.
- Honey brown, no burn.
Copy !req
1155. Look at that, huh?
Sell that in the store. Mmm.
Copy !req
1156. That's like advertisement worthy.
Copy !req
1157. - Advertisement quality.
- Yeah.
Copy !req
1158. Mmm.
Copy !req
1159. You think they ever
will make another Star Wars?
Copy !req
1160. I don't know. I think if they were
to make another one,
Copy !req
1161. that the period where this game is set
is where it would have to be
Copy !req
1162. 'cause there's nothin' after, really.
Copy !req
1163. Yeah. Return of the Jedi -
it's over. There's nothin' -
Copy !req
1164. Yeah, there's nothing else
to do there.
Copy !req
1165. - You can turn Han Solo into a Sith lord.
- What are you gonna do?
Copy !req
1166. - Good mornin'.
- Good mornin'.
Copy !req
1167. - You got to pee?
- Sure.
Copy !req
1168. Yeah. Hit the campfire.
Copy !req
1169. Ancient Native American custom.
Copy !req
1170. You give back to the Earth
what you take from it,
Copy !req
1171. and you don't burn the forest down.
Copy !req
1172. Okay, guys. Have a good day.
Copy !req
1173. Mason, don't forget.
I have to teach late today.
Copy !req
1174. - Sam's gonna pick you up. Right, Sam?
- Yeah.
Copy !req
1175. - All right.
- Okay. Bye, guys.
Copy !req
1176. See ya.
Copy !req
1177. - Hey.
- That's what I was talking to you about.
Copy !req
1178. - Yeah. Good luck with that.
- See you, man.
Copy !req
1179. - Don't bump into me, little bitch!
- I didn't.
Copy !req
1180. - You call me a liar?
- No.
Copy !req
1181. Don't act like you're tough shit,
motherfucker.
Copy !req
1182. I don't think pretty boy's hair's
good enough.
Copy !req
1183. Hey! Don't touch me, faggot!
Copy !req
1184. You're a fuckin' asshole.
Copy !req
1185. - Hey, Mason.
- Hi, Jill.
Copy !req
1186. So, where you going?
Copy !req
1187. Over to the college.
Copy !req
1188. - What's going on there?
- My mom's a teacher.
Copy !req
1189. Oh, cool. What does she teach?
Copy !req
1190. Psychology, I think.
Copy !req
1191. - What are you up to?
- Oh, my mom owns Needleworks.
Copy !req
1192. The arts and crafts store over there.
Copy !req
1193. So I'm just kinda hanging out.
Copy !req
1194. But I'm supposed to be going
to the hospital soon.
Copy !req
1195. - How come?
- You know Courtney?
Copy !req
1196. Girl with the dyed black hair
and the nose ring?
Copy !req
1197. - Wears Hot Topic every day?
- I think so.
Copy !req
1198. We used to be best friends growing up,
Copy !req
1199. but we've kind of grown apart.
Copy !req
1200. She sort of got all emo.
She thinks I'm a prep.
Copy !req
1201. But I still consider her a friend.
Copy !req
1202. Anyway, she cut one of her wrists.
Copy !req
1203. I don't know how bad,
but I think I should go visit.
Copy !req
1204. - So what are you reading?
- Uh, it's Breakfast of Champions.
Copy !req
1205. Kurt Vonnegut.
Copy !req
1206. I think my older brother likes him.
Copy !req
1207. I'm reading To Kill a Mockingbird
for the third time.
Copy !req
1208. My friends make fun of me.
Copy !req
1209. I think I'm the only girl in the whole school
who doesn't like the Twilight books.
Copy !req
1210. - Have you read them?
- Sure haven't.
Copy !req
1211. I tried, but it was so cheesy.
Copy !req
1212. So how do you like San Marcos?
Copy !req
1213. I like it all right.
Copy !req
1214. It's a lot smaller than Houston,
but it seems pretty cool.
Copy !req
1215. Have you always lived here?
Copy !req
1216. Yeah. If you want
the big city around here,
Copy !req
1217. you have to drive
to San Antonio or Austin.
Copy !req
1218. Have you been there yet?
Copy !req
1219. I went to San Antonio for a day,
Copy !req
1220. but I haven't been to Austin yet.
Copy !req
1221. That's where all the high school kids
go on weekends for shows and stuff.
Copy !req
1222. That's what I've heard.
Copy !req
1223. So are you going to Shauna's party
next weekend?
Copy !req
1224. Um, I think I heard about it.
I'm not really sure though.
Copy !req
1225. - Well, you should.
- Why's that?
Copy !req
1226. LeeAnn has a big crush on you,
and I know she was hoping you would go.
Copy !req
1227. - You don't have a girlfriend, do you?
- Not currently.
Copy !req
1228. Well, then you should come.
Copy !req
1229. - I'll tell Chase to make sure you're there.
- Okay.
Copy !req
1230. But don't tell LeeAnn I told you that.
She'd kill me.
Copy !req
1231. I won't.
Copy !req
1232. - Well, I better get going. See you later.
- Bye.
Copy !req
1233. His cognitive series,
his interviews with orphans,
Copy !req
1234. ethology theorists' work.
Copy !req
1235. And then he, in turn,
was supported strongly
Copy !req
1236. by Harry Harlow's
rhesus monkey study.
Copy !req
1237. You guys, you got to think,
this is the 1950s. This was radical.
Copy !req
1238. This flew in the face
of traditional learning theory,
Copy !req
1239. of B.F. Skinner's classical
and instrumental conditioning.
Copy !req
1240. Now, Bowlby's gonna argue
that human survival
Copy !req
1241. depends on us falling in love.
Copy !req
1242. It depends on me
falling in love with my mother,
Copy !req
1243. and my mother falling in love with me.
Copy !req
1244. And if that doesn't happen,
we're pretty much doomed.
Copy !req
1245. Now think about it.
Copy !req
1246. A tiger chases her tribe out of a cave.
Copy !req
1247. Now, an ideal mother goes -
Copy !req
1248. "My baby! I love you! I'll protect you."
Copy !req
1249. Or "Why am I gonna pick you up?
You're gonna slow me down.
Copy !req
1250. You are - tiger kibble."
Copy !req
1251. So next week we are gonna get into
Bowlby's four stages of attachment.
Copy !req
1252. Oh, oh, uh, Professor Douglas and I -
Copy !req
1253. Some of you might have
classes with Elena -
Copy !req
1254. She and I are hosting a little
pre-Thanksgiving get-together at my place,
Copy !req
1255. so if anyone wants to come,
please stop by.
Copy !req
1256. I'm not the greatest cook.
Copy !req
1257. Thanks, honey.
Copy !req
1258. Samantha!
Copy !req
1259. Why the hell didn't you pick up your brother
like you said you would?
Copy !req
1260. Mom, I know what you're gonna say.
Copy !req
1261. She was running late,
and we couldn't turn around.
Copy !req
1262. No, no! No excuses!
Copy !req
1263. The bottom line is you didn't do
what you said you were gonna do.
Copy !req
1264. You stranded your brother.
Copy !req
1265. It's embarrassing to ask
my friend to turn around
Copy !req
1266. and go get some kid
at the middle school.
Copy !req
1267. What do you mean "some kid"?
He's your brother.
Copy !req
1268. And you know what?
We've helped Janie out before.
Copy !req
1269. She lives right around the corner.
It's no big deal.
Copy !req
1270. Sorry.
Copy !req
1271. You know what, Samantha?
Copy !req
1272. You need to start thinking long and hard
about who you want to be.
Copy !req
1273. Do you want to be a cooperative person
Copy !req
1274. who's compassionate
and helps people out,
Copy !req
1275. or do you want to be
a self-centered narcissist?
Copy !req
1276. You know what? You're right.
I am this horrible person.
Copy !req
1277. But honestly,
he's not a baby anymore.
Copy !req
1278. You don't have to treat him like one.
Copy !req
1279. He's in eighth grade, and he can
find his way home if he wants to.
Copy !req
1280. You know what?
Copy !req
1281. When Gabi leaves,
you and me are gonna have a chat.
Copy !req
1282. Awkward.
Copy !req
1283. Dude, that sucks.
Copy !req
1284. - Hey, man. What's up?
- Hey, we're going camping tonight.
Copy !req
1285. - You in?
- Uh, who's goin'?
Copy !req
1286. My brother, one of his friends
and Tony... maybe.
Copy !req
1287. Yeah, let me check with my mom.
Copy !req
1288. Hey, Mom. Can I go camping
with Chase tonight?
Copy !req
1289. Camping? Where?
Copy !req
1290. Uh, at that house that his family's building.
It's pretty much finished.
Copy !req
1291. Well, will any adults be there?
Copy !req
1292. His brother's a senior.
Copy !req
1293. - You have your cell phone?
- Yeah.
Copy !req
1294. - Is it charged?
- Mm-hmm.
Copy !req
1295. Okay, do me a favor. Leave his parents'
number and the address on the counter.
Copy !req
1296. Okay.
Copy !req
1297. Yeah! That's what I'm talkin' about!
Copy !req
1298. - You ready?
- Check this shit out.
Copy !req
1299. That was all right,
but this is gonna be badass.
Copy !req
1300. All right, let me see -
Let me see what you can do.
Copy !req
1301. This is your face.
I'm about to break his face right here.
Copy !req
1302. Oh, shit!
Copy !req
1303. - Shit.
- All right. Now check this out.
Copy !req
1304. You might want to move.
Copy !req
1305. Oh!
Copy !req
1306. Ow! That'd be painful.
That's like the kidneys, stomach, something.
Copy !req
1307. Oh.
Copy !req
1308. Check this out, man.
Copy !req
1309. - Whoa!
- Pancreas.
Copy !req
1310. - That shit's lethal.
- Yeah, that would be painful.
Copy !req
1311. Man, have a beer, man.
That was awesome.
Copy !req
1312. - It's beer-30, children.
- Nice.
Copy !req
1313. - Aw, no, thanks.
- Come on, man.
Copy !req
1314. What are you, a pussy?
Copy !req
1315. No, I just don't feel like
drinking a beer right now.
Copy !req
1316. Man, if you're too chickenshit
to even have a beer,
Copy !req
1317. I know for a fact that you
have never gotten any pussy.
Copy !req
1318. Like you guys have.
Copy !req
1319. - Sure have.
- When?
Copy !req
1320. - Last summer.
- With who?
Copy !req
1321. It was awesome. Chase went down
easy street and fucked this whore Nancy.
Copy !req
1322. - At least that's what he said.
- I did. Would I lie?
Copy !req
1323. Bullshit. Quick, where were you?
Copy !req
1324. At Tobler's house.
And she fucked a couple other guys too.
Copy !req
1325. Oh, man, his first piece of ass
was sloppy seconds.
Copy !req
1326. What about you, Mason?
You ever got any?
Copy !req
1327. Yeah, you ever made her
howl into the night?
Copy !req
1328. A few times.
Copy !req
1329. - Really?
- Yeah, right.
Copy !req
1330. What was her name, Lucky?
Copy !req
1331. No.
Copy !req
1332. Jennifer.
She doesn't live here though.
Copy !req
1333. - She's back in Houston.
- You're fuckin' lying.
Copy !req
1334. I don't care if you assholes
believe me or not.
Copy !req
1335. Let me guess - you were pulling all kinds of ass
back home, but once you got down here, lefty.
Copy !req
1336. Hey, fuck you. I would,
but none of the girls here want to.
Copy !req
1337. Dude, it's not what they want, man.
It's what you want.
Copy !req
1338. - True "dat."
- You know what you should do?
Copy !req
1339. - Join a band. That's all it takes, man.
- Oh, yeah?
Copy !req
1340. Fuck yeah, dude.
Copy !req
1341. You don't even have to play that well.
Copy !req
1342. Start playing your instrument, and they line up
to give you blow jobs. Except for you.
Copy !req
1343. Doesn't impress the ladies so much
when you play flute for the marching band.
Copy !req
1344. I'm not in the fucking marching band.
Copy !req
1345. Oh, dude, you sure?
I heard you play the skin flute.
Copy !req
1346. All right.
I got a question for you guys.
Copy !req
1347. If you think you're so cool,
Copy !req
1348. why are you hanging out with a bunch
of eighth graders on a Friday night?
Copy !req
1349. Hey, fuck you, you little penis wrinkle.
Copy !req
1350. You're lucky to even be here.
This is our campout.
Copy !req
1351. The only reason you little cum gums
are here is because
Copy !req
1352. fucking Charlie's mom made him
bring his little asshole brother,
Copy !req
1353. and then he drags along
you little dice danglers.
Copy !req
1354. Fuckin' fuzz nut talking shit!
Copy !req
1355. It's all good, man. These little fuzz nuts
are gonna get their chance soon enough.
Copy !req
1356. - We got some whores coming by later.
- Yeah?
Copy !req
1357. - Hell yeah!
- Now, I know Chase will fuck anything.
Copy !req
1358. I've seen this kid mount boulders before.
Copy !req
1359. What about you guys? You in?
Copy !req
1360. - Whatever.
- All right. Good man.
Copy !req
1361. - What about you, Peter Puffer?
- I don't know.
Copy !req
1362. - Maybe.
- Dude, it's okay to be gay. We understand.
Copy !req
1363. Just, you know, sleep over there.
Copy !req
1364. I'm not gay.
Copy !req
1365. - Give it some time, man. You'll realize.
- Fuck y'all.
Copy !req
1366. See, that's exactly my point, man.
Copy !req
1367. Nah, we don't have whores coming over.
Copy !req
1368. We were just fucking with you
to see what you'd say.
Copy !req
1369. And you just earned your "vage" badge.
Copy !req
1370. Put it next to your bitch card.
Copy !req
1371. Yeah, 'cause, you know, you're a bitch.
Copy !req
1372. Now hold this
like the bitch you are, bitch.
Copy !req
1373. All right.
This shit is called the death punch.
Copy !req
1374. Oh!
Copy !req
1375. Okay.
Copy !req
1376. Hey, you guys made it. Good.
Copy !req
1377. - Oh, there you are.
- Oh, wow.
Copy !req
1378. And here you go, hostess.
Copy !req
1379. Oh, thank you.
Hey, can I get you a plate?
Copy !req
1380. - Oh, that's cool.
- Thanks.
Copy !req
1381. - You did that?
- Yeah.
Copy !req
1382. Wow.
Copy !req
1383. - How long have you been doing that for?
- Not very long.
Copy !req
1384. Um, I went to this camp thing
just this past summer.
Copy !req
1385. They have a camp for graffiti?
Copy !req
1386. - Well, they call it "urban art" -
- Oh.
Copy !req
1387. So it sounds, you know, less illegal.
Copy !req
1388. But it's only just a way
to get free spray paint.
Copy !req
1389. Cool. So is this your tag?
Is that what they still call it?
Copy !req
1390. Yeah, but you know, it's just letters
that I'm good at writing.
Copy !req
1391. It's good. K -
Copy !req
1392. - "E."
- E -
Copy !req
1393. Z-J-O.
Copy !req
1394. Kezjo. That's cool.
Copy !req
1395. It doesn't really mean anything though.
Copy !req
1396. - Is that your dad?
- Yeah.
Copy !req
1397. - Where's he live?
- In Houston.
Copy !req
1398. You get to see him much?
Copy !req
1399. Yeah. You know, some weekends
and over the summer.
Copy !req
1400. Cool.
Copy !req
1401. So, you're a student
of my mom's, right?
Copy !req
1402. Mm-hmm. Yeah, she's, um -
I got one class with her.
Copy !req
1403. Yeah, she's cool.
Copy !req
1404. How's she doing? Is she -
Is she a good teacher and everything?
Copy !req
1405. Yeah. She's great.
Copy !req
1406. She's super smart and she cares,
you know.
Copy !req
1407. She makes it interesting.
Copy !req
1408. She's probably even my favorite teacher.
Copy !req
1409. So, anyway, we figured out a way
Copy !req
1410. to rig up our iPods
to the external speakers on the ASV.
Copy !req
1411. So every time we come rolling into town,
Copy !req
1412. you knew the 456 was there
'cause we were bumping House of Pain.
Copy !req
1413. It was like,
"Jump around, jump around."
Copy !req
1414. The whole family's coming outside.
Copy !req
1415. You got the kids
and the mom and the dad,
Copy !req
1416. and they're all bouncing up and down.
Copy !req
1417. We're throwing out candies for the kids
Copy !req
1418. and soccer balls
and Beanie Babies and Frisbees,
Copy !req
1419. um, smokes for the adults,
Copy !req
1420. and, uh, they loved -
they absolutely loved Gatorade.
Copy !req
1421. But for some reason, you know,
they hated the lemon lime flavor.
Copy !req
1422. I don't know what it was.
Yeah. Couldn't give it away.
Copy !req
1423. - How long were you over there?
- I did two tours in Iraq and one in Bosnia.
Copy !req
1424. Wow.
Copy !req
1425. - Did you enlist?
- Mm-hmm. Yeah.
Copy !req
1426. I was, um, Army National Guard.
Copy !req
1427. And, uh, you know, coming
straight out of high school,
Copy !req
1428. needed money for college.
Copy !req
1429. Seemed like a decent-paying job.
And, uh, did my tour.
Copy !req
1430. And whenever I got done,
I told them if there's a world-changing event,
Copy !req
1431. I'll come back.
Copy !req
1432. And, uh, three months later,
Copy !req
1433. 9/11 happened, and I was back 9/12.
Copy !req
1434. And I'm proud to say the 456,
the whole time we were there,
Copy !req
1435. we never lost a guy, not one casualty.
Copy !req
1436. But is that odd? Is that unusual?
Copy !req
1437. Yeah.
Copy !req
1438. Almost impossible.
Copy !req
1439. Like the guys that came along after us
and replaced us,
Copy !req
1440. they didn't listen to any of our advice.
Copy !req
1441. They, you know, did basically
the polar opposite of what we did,
Copy !req
1442. and they lost seven guys
in the first month.
Copy !req
1443. Wow. What did you guys do differently?
Copy !req
1444. Well, I'd like to think it's just a matter
of mutual respect, you know.
Copy !req
1445. All the time we spent
over there building trust,
Copy !req
1446. these guys basically destroyed it
in three days.
Copy !req
1447. So what did the locals think
about why we're there?
Copy !req
1448. Oil. Plain and simple.
Copy !req
1449. Hey, Mason. One last hit.
Copy !req
1450. Hey. Mickey Mouse Club.
Copy !req
1451. Get the fuck out of my car.
Copy !req
1452. Just crawl out the back window
or something, man.
Copy !req
1453. I'm gonna miss you.
Copy !req
1454. I'll see you on Sunday night.
Copy !req
1455. All right. You better text me.
Copy !req
1456. Mm. Do you have any gum?
Copy !req
1457. Um - Yeah, I do, actually.
Copy !req
1458. - Here you go.
- Thanks. See ya.
Copy !req
1459. And they're buying this party line
Copy !req
1460. that they're supposed to feel bad
and trade off their own pension,
Copy !req
1461. as if that's what's been
corrupting this nation.
Copy !req
1462. Yeah, because those who hear Fox,
in my opinion, are being lied to.
Copy !req
1463. Yeah, thank God for Wisconsin.
We have to follow that example.
Copy !req
1464. You're right.
Copy !req
1465. Hey, Mason. What time is it?
Copy !req
1466. Uh, like 12:15.
Copy !req
1467. Happy birthday.
Copy !req
1468. Happy birthday!
Copy !req
1469. Mason, it's your birthday?
Copy !req
1470. Uh, just now, I guess.
Copy !req
1471. - Yeah, how old are you?
- Fifteen.
Copy !req
1472. Fifteen.
Copy !req
1473. Give me a hug. Happy birthday.
Copy !req
1474. Oh, my goodness.
Copy !req
1475. Hey.
Copy !req
1476. Have you - Have you been drinking?
Copy !req
1477. - Have you?
- Yeah, a little.
Copy !req
1478. - Have you?
- A little bit.
Copy !req
1479. Have you been -
Copy !req
1480. A little bit.
Copy !req
1481. Oh.
Copy !req
1482. - Oh, okay.
- I'm gonna go to sleep.
Copy !req
1483. Talk in the morning, huh?
Copy !req
1484. - Hey, Dad.
- Hey!
Copy !req
1485. - How you doing?
- Good.
Copy !req
1486. - Whose car is that?
- That's our car.
Copy !req
1487. - Hop on in there.
- Hey.
Copy !req
1488. Hey, sweetie. Mmm.
Copy !req
1489. Aw.
Copy !req
1490. Hey, Cooper. Hey.
Copy !req
1491. How's it going?
Copy !req
1492. Hello, little brother.
Copy !req
1493. He's so cute.
Copy !req
1494. Can we just replace
that part of the pipe?
Copy !req
1495. No. No, it's-it's no good.
Everything is no good.
Copy !req
1496. - ¿Todo? ¿Total?
- Everything. Yes. Mira.
Copy !req
1497. ¿Ya ve? Se quiebra.
Mira. Párate ahí para Que vea.
Copy !req
1498. This one is -
Copy !req
1499. - Gusto. It's stronger -
- Yes. It's better. Yes, yes, yes.
Copy !req
1500. Hey, listen, thanks
for that camera you got Mason.
Copy !req
1501. - Oh, yeah.
- He's loving that thing.
Copy !req
1502. - He's all into the photography thing right now.
- Yeah, I know.
Copy !req
1503. He's actually talking about turning
his closet into a darkroom.
Copy !req
1504. The red light and developing -
the whole bit.
Copy !req
1505. - You all right with that?
- I probably won't see him for a week.
Copy !req
1506. - Yeah. Right.
- But he's having a good time.
Copy !req
1507. - At least he's focused on something.
- Yeah. Yeah.
Copy !req
1508. - That's what I like.
- Yeah, he's all about it.
Copy !req
1509. Okay, let's go grande.
Copy !req
1510. It's good? It's better. Yes.
Copy !req
1511. Mira. Agarra la "pipa"
y la caja y vamos a hacer todo.
Copy !req
1512. - Claro.
- Sí.
Copy !req
1513. Hey, you know, you're smart.
You should be in school.
Copy !req
1514. I like school. I need school.
Copy !req
1515. But it's hard. I working all days.
Copy !req
1516. Go to night school
at community college.
Copy !req
1517. It's-It's pretty affordable.
Copy !req
1518. You're doing a nice job
with the house though. It's looking great.
Copy !req
1519. - Thanks.
- Really great.
Copy !req
1520. Yeah. Some fix-its here and there.
Copy !req
1521. We got a good deal on a foreclosure,
so now I'm finding out why.
Copy !req
1522. - Yeah, right. Hey, bud.
- You know?
Copy !req
1523. Hey. Happy birthday, huh?
Copy !req
1524. - What's that?
- That's our new car.
Copy !req
1525. Get in it.
Copy !req
1526. All right, have a good weekend.
Copy !req
1527. Hey.
Copy !req
1528. - Hi.
- How you doing?
Copy !req
1529. - Good to see you.
- You too.
Copy !req
1530. Hey.
Copy !req
1531. - How are you?
- Ooh.
Copy !req
1532. You look great. Ooh! Look at him.
Copy !req
1533. Oh! He's got Mason's nose.
Copy !req
1534. - Yeah, isn't he cute?
- Yeah.
Copy !req
1535. - All right.
- Bye, you guys.
Copy !req
1536. We got a big drive ahead of us.
Copy !req
1537. - Bye, Sam.
- You guys drive safe.
Copy !req
1538. All right.
Well, we'll be back tomorrow night.
Copy !req
1539. Bye, honey.
I'm so glad you were born.
Copy !req
1540. So, this is, like, Annie's car and -
Copy !req
1541. and you drive the GTO?
Copy !req
1542. I guess you can't really
put a baby seat in that thing.
Copy !req
1543. Yeah, no.
But I had to sell that anyway.
Copy !req
1544. - You what?
- Yeah, I had to sell that.
Copy !req
1545. So - So it's gone?
Copy !req
1546. Yeah, some sucker collector
from California paid 22 grand for it,
Copy !req
1547. which is great 'cause I basically
got to pay for this in cash.
Copy !req
1548. I only paid 8,500 for that thing
way back when.
Copy !req
1549. Cars are generally
a terrible investment, you know?
Copy !req
1550. Soon as you drive them off the lot,
you got a used car on your hands,
Copy !req
1551. and the value's only dropping from there.
Copy !req
1552. But if you take care of it, you know,
Copy !req
1553. and you get lucky and it's a classic,
the value starts going up again.
Copy !req
1554. Shit, you got guys paying hundreds of thousands
of dollars for some Shelby Cobra.
Copy !req
1555. What?
Copy !req
1556. You don't remember?
Copy !req
1557. - Remember what?
- Really?
Copy !req
1558. You said that was gonna be my car
when I turned 16.
Copy !req
1559. What?
Copy !req
1560. - No, I didn't. I never said that.
- I remember.
Copy !req
1561. I was in third grade,
Copy !req
1562. and you were taking me over to
Anthony Nagar's house for his birthday,
Copy !req
1563. and we were there early,
so we gave him a ride around the block.
Copy !req
1564. He was talking about
how much he loved your car,
Copy !req
1565. and you were all like, "This is gonna
be Mason's when he turns 16."
Copy !req
1566. What are you -
Copy !req
1567. First off, I have no memory
of that, all right?
Copy !req
1568. Second of all,
I would never say that. Never.
Copy !req
1569. You did though.
Copy !req
1570. What - Mason.
Copy !req
1571. What about your sister?
I'm just gonna forget about her?
Copy !req
1572. Come on, how's that fair?
Copy !req
1573. Huh? Anthony Nagar. What -
Copy !req
1574. Are you -
Copy !req
1575. Oh, come on.
Copy !req
1576. I mean, you're not -
Copy !req
1577. Look, you can sit there
like there's a death in the family,
Copy !req
1578. but bottom line is that was my car.
Copy !req
1579. I paid for it, I took care of it,
and I can do whatever I want with it.
Copy !req
1580. All right?
I'm sorry if you had other ideas about it,
Copy !req
1581. but when you get older, you can save up
and buy a car of your own
Copy !req
1582. and be cool like I used to be.
Copy !req
1583. Or... you can get a minivan.
Copy !req
1584. We're gonna make you swim out of here
Copy !req
1585. in your own blood.
Copy !req
1586. Does your mom
actually let you watch this?
Copy !req
1587. Yeah. She likes it too.
Copy !req
1588. Oh, my God.
Copy !req
1589. - Okay. Well -
Yeah.
Copy !req
1590. Have you ever seen her in concert?
Copy !req
1591. No. But she's coming
to Houston in April.
Copy !req
1592. - She's coming to Houston?
- Mm-hmm.
Copy !req
1593. Your dad and I could get you tickets
and you can stay with us.
Copy !req
1594. - That'd be great.
- Yeah.
Copy !req
1595. - Hey, hey, Annie?
- Yeah?
Copy !req
1596. Will you get me
the little birthday present for Mason?
Copy !req
1597. - Yeah, babe.
- All right.
Copy !req
1598. This one - This one needs
a little explanation, okay?
Copy !req
1599. Open it up.
Copy !req
1600. I call that the Beatles' Black Album.
Copy !req
1601. What it is is the best of John, Paul,
George and Ringo solo, post-breakup.
Copy !req
1602. Thanks.
Copy !req
1603. Yeah, basically, I put the band
back together for you.
Copy !req
1604. Whenever you listen to
too much of the solo stuff,
Copy !req
1605. it kind of becomes a drag, you know?
Copy !req
1606. But you put 'em next to each other, right,
Copy !req
1607. and they start to elevate each other,
and then you can hear it.
Copy !req
1608. Ah. It's the Beatles. You know?
Copy !req
1609. I don't know.
I think I always just liked Paul the best.
Copy !req
1610. It doesn't matter.
You're missing the point.
Copy !req
1611. There is no favorite Beatle.
Copy !req
1612. That's what I'm saying.
It's in the balance.
Copy !req
1613. That's what made them the greatest
fucking rock band in the world, okay?
Copy !req
1614. And there's this decade of music
out there that's been scattered.
Copy !req
1615. And now it has been carefully found,
arranged and ordered for you
Copy !req
1616. by your loving father.
Copy !req
1617. Very arranged and very organized
over and over again
Copy !req
1618. - by your loving father.
- Yes, yes, yes.
Copy !req
1619. So, I mean, look at that -
look at that.
Copy !req
1620. Top of volume II, first four tracks,
Copy !req
1621. you've got "Band on the Run"
Copy !req
1622. into "My Sweet Lord,"
into "Jealous Guy," into "Photograph."
Copy !req
1623. I mean, come on,
it's like the perfect segue.
Copy !req
1624. You got Paul
who takes you to the party,
Copy !req
1625. George who talks to you about God,
Copy !req
1626. John who says no,
it's about love and pain,
Copy !req
1627. and then Ringo who just says hey,
Copy !req
1628. can't we enjoy what we have
while we have it?
Copy !req
1629. It's a good record. I shit you not.
Copy !req
1630. Cool.
Copy !req
1631. MASON SR.:
Hey there, Cliff.
Copy !req
1632. Hey, how you doin'? How you doin'?
Copy !req
1633. - It's good to see you.
- Great to see you.
Copy !req
1634. - You made it all right.
- Yeah, we sure did. We sure did.
Copy !req
1635. How are you, darlin'?
Copy !req
1636. - All right, we ready?
- Yeah, yeah, get started.
Copy !req
1637. Wait. Help light 'em up.
Copy !req
1638. Hey, Sam.
Copy !req
1639. Come on.
Copy !req
1640. Hey, still sleeping here?
Copy !req
1641. - Oh, yeah.
- Hey, buddy.
Copy !req
1642. - Sawin' logs.
- Oh! Ready?
Copy !req
1643. Make a wish. Make a wish.
Copy !req
1644. - Hey!
- Real good!
Copy !req
1645. Presents. Wait, wait, wait.
Here, sweetie.
Copy !req
1646. MASON SR.: Sam, would you
get us a knife so we can cut this up?
Copy !req
1647. All right.
Copy !req
1648. I hope you like it.
Copy !req
1649. I heard you didn't have one, so -
Copy !req
1650. It's a Bible. This is your first Bible.
Copy !req
1651. Look. There's your name.
Copy !req
1652. - Wow.
- In gold. And wait, wait, wait.
Copy !req
1653. Look at this. Okay.
It's a red letter edition,
Copy !req
1654. and that means that everything
that Jesus said is in red.
Copy !req
1655. - Thank you.
- Like it?
Copy !req
1656. All right. I love you, sweetie.
Happy birthday.
Copy !req
1657. - This one's from us.
- Wait.
Copy !req
1658. It's not gonna make
all your dreams come true.
Copy !req
1659. Just keep your expectations low.
Copy !req
1660. No, no, no. You need it.
Copy !req
1661. Hey! Come on, right?
You got to have it.
Copy !req
1662. You need this.
You've got a life ahead of you.
Copy !req
1663. And the shirt is blue,
and I know you like blue.
Copy !req
1664. MASON SR.:
You've got dances and job interviews.
Copy !req
1665. I'm gonna get it all wrinkled here.
Copy !req
1666. - Mason?
- The Black Album was from me.
Copy !req
1667. - Uh-oh.
- Come here, son.
Copy !req
1668. Pull that off.
Copy !req
1669. There's a 20-gauge shotgun.
Copy !req
1670. - Wow.
- Yeah.
Copy !req
1671. My dad gave it to me
when I was a little younger than you,
Copy !req
1672. and his dad gave it to him,
Copy !req
1673. and, well, you're 15
and I'd like for you to have it, all right?
Copy !req
1674. Here, you hold it.
Copy !req
1675. Yeah?
Copy !req
1676. - Thank you.
- Congratulations, son.
Copy !req
1677. I'll teach you how to clean it,
teach you how to fire it.
Copy !req
1678. I'll teach you a little bit of safety.
Copy !req
1679. Now cock it.
All right, there you go.
Copy !req
1680. Now, what you want to do is line up
the front sight with the back sight here.
Copy !req
1681. - You see this little "V" right here?
- Mm-hmm.
Copy !req
1682. - Now, which one you aiming at?
- Uh, the middle can.
Copy !req
1683. The middle can? All right, all right.
Copy !req
1684. - Now, fire at will, all right?
- All right.
Copy !req
1685. - Ho! Whoa!
- Yeah!
Copy !req
1686. All right, watch out, watch out.
Copy !req
1687. Whoa. Be careful. All right.
Copy !req
1688. Ready?
Copy !req
1689. Pull!
Copy !req
1690. Oh, you-you, uh - you hit a little low.
Copy !req
1691. Wait until it gets up high
and then shoot, all right?
Copy !req
1692. 'Cause then it's
a better aim coming down.
Copy !req
1693. Remember, second trigger.
Copy !req
1694. Mm-hmm.
Copy !req
1695. - Ready?
- Mm-hmm.
Copy !req
1696. Pull!
Copy !req
1697. Ha! Ha! Look what you did.
Copy !req
1698. Well, you nailed it, didn't you?
Copy !req
1699. - How's that feel?
- Felt good.
Copy !req
1700. Yeah, it felt good. Good.
Copy !req
1701. - Oh!
- You're our first
audience, you know?
Copy !req
1702. That was - It was wonderful.
Copy !req
1703. MASON SR.: Mason demanded
we work on it the whole time.
Copy !req
1704. - Thank you, thank you.
- It's a work in progress.
Copy !req
1705. A week later - We don't know
why Thomas wasn't there the first time.
Copy !req
1706. But a week later, Thomas comes back
and joins the other disciples.
Copy !req
1707. They say,
"Hey, the Lord's alive. We saw him."
Copy !req
1708. "I won't believe it
until I put my finger into his side
Copy !req
1709. and I'm gonna see
those nail prints in his hands."
Copy !req
1710. Phew. About that time, here comes Jesus
standing right next to him, okay?
Copy !req
1711. And he turns to Thomas.
Copy !req
1712. Don't you know Thomas felt some shame?
Copy !req
1713. He turns to Thomas and says,
"Thomas, here, stick your finger in my side.
Copy !req
1714. Look at these nail prints. It's me."
Copy !req
1715. And Thomas says,
"My Lord and my God, I believe."
Copy !req
1716. And Jesus said, "Well, that's good.
Copy !req
1717. But blessed are those
who can believe without seeing."
Copy !req
1718. It's a lot easier when you can see
Copy !req
1719. and feel and touch.
Copy !req
1720. But like us,
we haven't seen him in the flesh.
Copy !req
1721. We haven't felt him in the flesh,
Copy !req
1722. but we have experienced him in the spirit.
Copy !req
1723. At least I have.
And I hope y'all have too.
Copy !req
1724. This pond's right up here.
Copy !req
1725. Ooh, it's low.
Copy !req
1726. Yeah.
Copy !req
1727. My dad could take you fishing
next time you're here if you want.
Copy !req
1728. Nice.
Copy !req
1729. Hey, baby. What's going on?
Copy !req
1730. I think we're just gonna
hang out here for a minute.
Copy !req
1731. - You want me to stay with you?
- No, it's okay.
Copy !req
1732. - You sure?
- Yeah, thanks.
Copy !req
1733. Mason, why are you such a stick-in-the-mud?
Copy !req
1734. What are you even talking about?
Copy !req
1735. Hey, you guys don't mind coming back here
on the 20th, do you, for Cooper's baptism?
Copy !req
1736. - No, it's fine.
- Sam?
Copy !req
1737. - Okay.
- I appreciate it.
Copy !req
1738. It means a lot to Annie
and her folks, you know.
Copy !req
1739. Were we baptized?
Copy !req
1740. I wasn't the least bit concerned
with the state of your soul.
Copy !req
1741. - We can do it now, though, if you want.
- No, I think I'm all right.
Copy !req
1742. You and Cooper together, you know.
Copy !req
1743. Dunk your heads.
Copy !req
1744. You're not becoming one of those
God people, are you, Dad?
Copy !req
1745. And what's that supposed to mean, hmm?
Copy !req
1746. I can hear you!
Copy !req
1747. Well, I think that shotgun
should live at my house, huh?
Copy !req
1748. I don't think your mom would love that.
Copy !req
1749. Hey, look out, Sam.
Let me show you how it's done.
Copy !req
1750. Nice, Dad.
Copy !req
1751. MASON SR.:
Still got the goods, hmm?
Copy !req
1752. How long you been in here, Mason?
Copy !req
1753. I'm not sure.
Copy !req
1754. I'm sure.
Copy !req
1755. All class.
Copy !req
1756. Did you complete your image diary?
Copy !req
1757. Not yet.
Copy !req
1758. Completed your digital contact sheet?
Copy !req
1759. Not quite. But, I mean,
it's not gonna take me long.
Copy !req
1760. "Not yet."Not quite."
Copy !req
1761. Darkroom time is extracurricular.
Copy !req
1762. Technically, you don't ever
have to be in here these days
Copy !req
1763. and certainly not until
you've completed your assignments.
Copy !req
1764. - That's the deal.
- Sorry.
Copy !req
1765. I'm worried about you, Mason.
Copy !req
1766. - Why is that?
- I'll tell you why.
Copy !req
1767. The images you're turning in,
they're cool.
Copy !req
1768. You're looking at things
in a really unique way.
Copy !req
1769. Got a lot of natural talent.
Copy !req
1770. Thanks.
Copy !req
1771. Yeah, but that and 50 cents will just get you
a cup of coffee in this old world.
Copy !req
1772. I've met a lot of talented people
over the years.
Copy !req
1773. How many of them
made it professionally
Copy !req
1774. without discipline, commitment
and a really good work ethic?
Copy !req
1775. I can tell you.
Copy !req
1776. I can count it on two fingers.
Copy !req
1777. Zero.
Copy !req
1778. It's not gonna happen for you, Mason.
Copy !req
1779. The world is too competitive.
Copy !req
1780. There are too many talented people
who are willing to work hard
Copy !req
1781. and a boatload of morons
who are untalented
Copy !req
1782. who are more than willing
to surpass you.
Copy !req
1783. As a matter of fact, a lot of them are sitting
in that classroom out there right now.
Copy !req
1784. You know what they're doing?
They're doing their assignments.
Copy !req
1785. Which is what you're
supposed to be doing.
Copy !req
1786. But you're not. You're in here.
Now, why is that?
Copy !req
1787. - You special, Mason?
- No.
Copy !req
1788. But the things you're talking about,
like work ethic or whatever,
Copy !req
1789. I feel like I do work pretty hard.
Copy !req
1790. I spend the whole weekend
taking pictures a lot of times.
Copy !req
1791. You like football, Mason?
Copy !req
1792. - Not really.
- Yeah, I know you don't.
Copy !req
1793. That's why I've just assigned you
to shoot the football game tonight.
Copy !req
1794. Okay? It starts at 7:30.
I want you to get there early.
Copy !req
1795. I want you to shoot a full card,
300 images. I want 'em downloaded.
Copy !req
1796. I want 'em sorted, and I wanna see 'em
very first thing Monday.
Copy !req
1797. Okay?
Copy !req
1798. Wanna know why I'm doing this?
Copy !req
1799. I guess.
Copy !req
1800. Who do you wanna be, Mason?
Copy !req
1801. - What do you wanna do?
- I wanna take pictures.
Copy !req
1802. Make art.
Copy !req
1803. Any dipshit can take pictures, Mason.
Copy !req
1804. Art - that's special.
Copy !req
1805. What can you bring to it
that nobody else can?
Copy !req
1806. That's what I'm trying to find out.
Copy !req
1807. Try harder.
Copy !req
1808. Hey, maybe in 20 years
you can call old Mr. Turlington
Copy !req
1809. and you can say, "Thank you, sir,
Copy !req
1810. for that terrific darkroom chat
we had that day."
Copy !req
1811. Get back to class and do your work.
Copy !req
1812. Hey, man.
You're walking a little funny.
Copy !req
1813. Fuck you.
Copy !req
1814. I'm just saying, you guys were
in there for a long time.
Copy !req
1815. Just hope he bought you dinner first.
Copy !req
1816. Mason, honey, come down for dinner!
Copy !req
1817. Samantha, you didn't post these pictures
and their descriptions?
Copy !req
1818. Come on. This auction
is gonna end on Sunday.
Copy !req
1819. Honey, you got to get those posted.
Copy !req
1820. Why are we even doing this?
Copy !req
1821. It's like an online junk shop.
I thought you had a good job.
Copy !req
1822. I do. We're what you
call "house poor."
Copy !req
1823. Everyone's got to do their part.
Your brother took the pictures.
Copy !req
1824. You have to help.
Copy !req
1825. Who even buys this shit?
Copy !req
1826. Hey, Sam, watch your mouth, all right?
Copy !req
1827. Don't disrespect your mother.
You like a roof over your head, don't you?
Copy !req
1828. Yeah, and you like having electricity
so that you can charge your cell phone?
Copy !req
1829. I'm not even gonna be here next year.
Copy !req
1830. I'm a senior. I should be having fun.
Copy !req
1831. Nice nails.
Copy !req
1832. Yeah, some girl did that in sixth period.
Copy !req
1833. You planning on keeping 'em?
Copy !req
1834. Until it comes off, I guess.
Copy !req
1835. Last summer it was the earrings,
and now the nails.
Copy !req
1836. You got a, uh -
You got a purse to go with all that?
Copy !req
1837. A lot of guys do that.
He's just trying to be cool.
Copy !req
1838. When I was in high school,
Copy !req
1839. having a job, being responsible,
Copy !req
1840. being able to afford a car,
that was cool.
Copy !req
1841. Mason, honey, why don't you get you
and your sister some water?
Copy !req
1842. Hey, man, Turlington says to cut
the artsy crap and shoot the game.
Copy !req
1843. So take your lens and point it that way.
Copy !req
1844. - Jesus Christ.
- Also, we got a ride.
Copy !req
1845. McCormick's gonna take us to the party.
Copy !req
1846. We're gonna head out after the game.
You're going, okay?
Copy !req
1847. Okay.
Copy !req
1848. Shoot the game.
Copy !req
1849. Ow!
Copy !req
1850. Oh! First one.
Copy !req
1851. - That's what I'm talking about.
- What was that?
Copy !req
1852. - What's up?
- What is up?
Copy !req
1853. - Hey, what's up?
- Hey. How's it going?
Copy !req
1854. Pretty good.
Copy !req
1855. How long have you been here?
Copy !req
1856. I don't know. A while, I guess.
Copy !req
1857. A while? Yeah.
Copy !req
1858. I just feel like there's so many things
Copy !req
1859. that I could be doing and probably
wanna be doing that I'm just not.
Copy !req
1860. Why aren't you?
Copy !req
1861. I mean, I guess it's just being afraid
Copy !req
1862. of what people would think -
you know, judgment.
Copy !req
1863. Yeah. I guess it's really easy to say,
Copy !req
1864. like, "I don't care what anyone else thinks,"
but everyone does.
Copy !req
1865. - You know? Deep down.
- Exactly.
Copy !req
1866. I find myself so furious at all these people
that I'm in contact with
Copy !req
1867. just for controlling me or whatever.
Copy !req
1868. But they're not even aware
they're doing it.
Copy !req
1869. Yeah.
Copy !req
1870. So,
Copy !req
1871. in this perfect world
where's no one's controlling you,
Copy !req
1872. what's different?
Copy !req
1873. - What changes?
- Everything.
Copy !req
1874. I just wanna be able to do anything I want,
Copy !req
1875. because it makes me feel alive
Copy !req
1876. as opposed to giving me
the appearance of normality.
Copy !req
1877. Whatever that means.
Copy !req
1878. I don't think it means much.
Copy !req
1879. You're kind of weird, you know that?
Copy !req
1880. Yeah?
Copy !req
1881. - Is that a compliment?
- I don't know.
Copy !req
1882. Do you wanna be weird?
Copy !req
1883. I don't wanna, like, scare kids at the park
or anything like that.
Copy !req
1884. I really like talking with you.
Copy !req
1885. I don't usually even try
Copy !req
1886. to, like, vocalize my thoughts
or feelings or anything.
Copy !req
1887. Just - I don't know.
It never sounds right. Words are stupid.
Copy !req
1888. So, why are you trying with me?
Copy !req
1889. I don't know.
I guess I feel comfortable.
Copy !req
1890. I'm glad.
Copy !req
1891. Hey, Jim.
Copy !req
1892. Uh, sorry I'm so late.
Copy !req
1893. What time were you
supposed to be home?
Copy !req
1894. I don't know.
A while ago.
Copy !req
1895. A while ago
like 30 minutes ago, an hour ago?
Copy !req
1896. 'Cause, truthfully,
nobody even knew where you were
Copy !req
1897. until your sister told us.
Copy !req
1898. She's been home for a while.
Copy !req
1899. I'm sorry.
Copy !req
1900. Yeah, been hearing a lot of that lately.
Copy !req
1901. See, but you don't actually care.
Copy !req
1902. You just kind of - kind of
come and go as you please,
Copy !req
1903. and you don't care if your mom's upset
or what time you got to be home.
Copy !req
1904. Is that what's up?
Copy !req
1905. - I don't know what to tell you.
- Stop mumbling.
Copy !req
1906. You know, speak up.
Copy !req
1907. I can't understand a word
coming out of your mouth.
Copy !req
1908. It's just like -
Copy !req
1909. And I ask you questions,
and you just -
Copy !req
1910. Can I just have one day where
everybody isn't all over my ass?
Copy !req
1911. I'm up your ass?
Copy !req
1912. This is my house.
Copy !req
1913. Now, if you wanna live in my house,
Copy !req
1914. then you get home when you say
you're gonna be home.
Copy !req
1915. You know, Jim, you're not my dad.
Copy !req
1916. No, I'm not your dad.
You know how I know that?
Copy !req
1917. 'Cause I'm actually here.
Copy !req
1918. I'm the guy with the job, paying the bills,
Copy !req
1919. taking care of you, your mom, your sister.
Copy !req
1920. Huh? Huh?
Copy !req
1921. I'm that guy.
Copy !req
1922. - Morning.
- Morning.
Copy !req
1923. Hey, which one of you guys used
the downstairs bathroom last night?
Copy !req
1924. I don't know. I didn't.
Copy !req
1925. That tall guy, what's his name?
Copy !req
1926. - Phillip?
- Yeah, Phillip. He did it.
Copy !req
1927. Can Phillip read?
Copy !req
1928. There's a big sign on the door that says,
"Do not use this bathroom. It's broken."
Copy !req
1929. How difficult is that?
Copy !req
1930. I don't know. I'm sorry.
Copy !req
1931. I think I'm gonna put
the house on the market.
Copy !req
1932. Why?
Copy !req
1933. This house is too big for us.
Copy !req
1934. You're going to school eventually.
Copy !req
1935. It's too expensive. I'm done.
Copy !req
1936. Well, why did you even buy it
in the first place then?
Copy !req
1937. Because I really enjoy
making poor life decisions,
Copy !req
1938. keeping us on the brink of poverty.
Copy !req
1939. I've spent the first half of my life
acquiring all this crap,
Copy !req
1940. and now I'm gonna spend the second half
of my life getting rid of all this stuff.
Copy !req
1941. Really? Like what?
Copy !req
1942. Like - Well, I got rid
of a couple husbands.
Copy !req
1943. Now I'm gonna get rid of a mortgage,
some maintenance,
Copy !req
1944. the tchotchkes,
the - the homeowner's insurance,
Copy !req
1945. the property tax, the plumbing.
Copy !req
1946. You know what? From now on,
I am gonna be Mommy Monk.
Copy !req
1947. Simple. Celibate.
Copy !req
1948. Don't be gross, Mom.
Copy !req
1949. Fine.
Copy !req
1950. I'll be a poor whore with a big house.
Copy !req
1951. Is that better?
Copy !req
1952. Okay.
Copy !req
1953. Mason -
Copy !req
1954. Mason, please, don't leave me
that dirty dish to wash.
Copy !req
1955. I do dishes all day.
Copy !req
1956. Well, great, honey.
Then you're a professional.
Copy !req
1957. Come on, you could do one or two
more for your poor old mom.
Copy !req
1958. Okay.
Copy !req
1959. Thank you.
Copy !req
1960. You want one?
Copy !req
1961. She didn't even touch them, seriously.
I watched her the whole time.
Copy !req
1962. I bet you did watch her,
you little pervert.
Copy !req
1963. It's like we're on a date.
Copy !req
1964. Cheers.
Copy !req
1965. It's a night of romance.
Copy !req
1966. Yeah, except I'm not gonna kiss you.
Copy !req
1967. I will blow you though.
Copy !req
1968. Mason!
Copy !req
1969. We are in the weeds out here.
Copy !req
1970. I'm going as fast as I can.
Copy !req
1971. Oh. Then I must be confused then,
Copy !req
1972. 'cause I just saw you
chattin' it up with April
Copy !req
1973. when I got a salad bar
that needs a refill.
Copy !req
1974. I got a six-top, two four-tops I can't use
because they hadn't been bussed.
Copy !req
1975. Enrique is not here. I'm trying.
Copy !req
1976. Well, while you're tryin', we're dyin'!
Copy !req
1977. What - What am I supposed
to tell my customers?
Copy !req
1978. "Oh, I'm sorry that your table's
got dirty plates on it, but Mason's tryin'.
Copy !req
1979. At least that's what he told me
Copy !req
1980. after he was flirtin' with April
and eatin' your leftover shrimp."
Copy !req
1981. Now, it is a challenge
out there today, I know.
Copy !req
1982. But I wanna share something with you.
Copy !req
1983. I got you pegged
for fry cook this summer,
Copy !req
1984. and that's a lot more responsibility.
Copy !req
1985. It's also more money. How's that sound?
Copy !req
1986. Good.
Copy !req
1987. I know you can handle that money,
but can you take the responsibility?
Copy !req
1988. I think you can,
because I believe in you.
Copy !req
1989. But I need you on the floor.
Now, leave the dishes.
Copy !req
1990. Giddyap. All right, come on.
Don't let me down.
Copy !req
1991. Well, so it's - it's runnin' okay?
Copy !req
1992. That alternator's
not messin' up anymore?
Copy !req
1993. No, it's fine. It's up for the trip.
Copy !req
1994. Well, you gonna see your sister
when you guys are in Austin?
Copy !req
1995. Yeah, she said I can stay at her dorm,
which is cool,
Copy !req
1996. and I guess her roommate's
out of town, so it's no big deal.
Copy !req
1997. All right, well, did you apply there yet?
Did you get that application in to UT?
Copy !req
1998. - Not yet, but Sheena's pretty much in though.
- Yeah, right.
Copy !req
1999. Well, if you know
that's where you wanna go,
Copy !req
2000. you should probably do that
early acceptance thing.
Copy !req
2001. I mean, seriously, let 'em know
you're a man who knows what he wants.
Copy !req
2002. Yeah.
Copy !req
2003. A little decisiveness goes
a long way in this life. All right?
Copy !req
2004. - Yeah.
- Great.
Copy !req
2005. And what about work?
How's that going?
Copy !req
2006. Uh, I don't know. It's all right.
Copy !req
2007. Today kind of sucked.
This guy didn't show up.
Copy !req
2008. But it's definitely an interesting
perspective on the world.
Copy !req
2009. People are slobs.
Copy !req
2010. Well, when people
ask me about you,
Copy !req
2011. I say to them,
"Oh, Mason, he's doing great.
Copy !req
2012. He's got a job.
He's really cleaning up."
Copy !req
2013. All right, hey. Hey, say hi to Annie
and Cooper, will you?
Copy !req
2014. Say hi to your big brother.
Hey, big brother.
Copy !req
2015. Hey, Annie. Hey, kiddo.
Copy !req
2016. - Can you say bye-bye?
- Bye-buh.
Copy !req
2017. We'll see you soon.
Copy !req
2018. MASON SR.: All right, well, be careful
when you're driving, all right?
Copy !req
2019. Don't be texting.
Don't be doing any of that.
Copy !req
2020. All right. Just - You're Obi-Wan.
Copy !req
2021. You're centered, patient. Right?
Copy !req
2022. You watch three cars ahead,
two behind.
Copy !req
2023. It takes two bad drivers
to have an accident, okay?
Copy !req
2024. - Okay.
- Right.
Copy !req
2025. Tell your sister to pick up her phone
or call me back or something.
Copy !req
2026. - Okay.
- All right, buddy. You have a good one.
Copy !req
2027. Bye, Dad.
Copy !req
2028. Hey, honey, take this to your sister.
Copy !req
2029. - Throw it in the truck, okay?
- Okay, I will.
Copy !req
2030. So where is Sheena staying?
Copy !req
2031. At her friend Emily's.
Copy !req
2032. Is Emily a real person?
Copy !req
2033. Yeah. Yeah. She's a sophomore.
She has an apartment.
Copy !req
2034. Okay, this is in case of emergency.
Copy !req
2035. - Don't spend it. I want it back.
- Okay. Thanks.
Copy !req
2036. Did you do your homework?
Copy !req
2037. Most of it,
but I can finish tomorrow night.
Copy !req
2038. Honey, 11th grade
is really important for college.
Copy !req
2039. - Don't blow it.
- I know. I know.
Copy !req
2040. We're going to UT and everything.
Copy !req
2041. Oh, don't you want me to come?
Copy !req
2042. Come on. Sheena.
Road trip with Mom. I'll pay for gas.
Copy !req
2043. Um -
Copy !req
2044. I'm just kidding. I have work.
Copy !req
2045. - Call me when you get there.
- I will.
Copy !req
2046. Have fun.
Copy !req
2047. That sounds to me like just another
extreme Mason view of everything.
Copy !req
2048. Not at all.
I finally figured it out.
Copy !req
2049. It's like when they realized
it was gonna be too expensive
Copy !req
2050. to actually build cyborgs and robots -
Copy !req
2051. I mean, the costs of that
were impossible.
Copy !req
2052. They decided to just let humans
turn themselves into robots.
Copy !req
2053. That's what's going on right now.
Copy !req
2054. - Oh, right now?
- Yeah. I mean, why not?
Copy !req
2055. There are billions of us just laying around,
not really doing anything.
Copy !req
2056. We don't cost anything.
Copy !req
2057. I mean, we're even pretty good
at self-maintenance and reproducing constantly.
Copy !req
2058. And as it turns out,
Copy !req
2059. we're already biologically programmed
for our little cyborg upgrade.
Copy !req
2060. - How?
- Seriously.
Copy !req
2061. I read this thing the other day
Copy !req
2062. about how, like, when you hear
that "ding" on your in-box,
Copy !req
2063. you get, like,
a dopamine rush in your brain.
Copy !req
2064. It's like we're being chemically rewarded
Copy !req
2065. for allowing ourselves to be brainwashed.
Copy !req
2066. How evil is that? We're fucked.
Copy !req
2067. So you deleting your Facebook page
is gonna change all that?
Copy !req
2068. Remember when Trevor deleted
his Facebook page last year
Copy !req
2069. and everyone just hated him?
Copy !req
2070. You made more fun of him
than anyone.
Copy !req
2071. I still make fun of Trevor though.
Copy !req
2072. But it was like he was so
pathetically desperate for attention.
Copy !req
2073. Or to be different or something.
Copy !req
2074. That's just 'cause they did that lame story
about it in the school paper.
Copy !req
2075. And then he had to make a big announcement
about it when he came back a month later.
Copy !req
2076. That's the thing though.
I'm not doing it for attention.
Copy !req
2077. I just wanna try and not live my life
through a screen.
Copy !req
2078. I want, like, some kind
of actual interaction.
Copy !req
2079. A real person,
not just the profile they put up.
Copy !req
2080. Oh, I'm sorry.
Were you saying something?
Copy !req
2081. Yeah, okay, I know you're joking.
Copy !req
2082. But it's kind of true. You have been
checking your phone this whole time.
Copy !req
2083. So what are you really doing?
Copy !req
2084. You don't care what your friends
are up to on Saturday afternoon,
Copy !req
2085. but you're also obviously not fully
experiencing my profound bitching.
Copy !req
2086. So - it's like everyone's just stuck
in, like, an in-between state,
Copy !req
2087. not really experiencing anything.
Copy !req
2088. It's not an experience.
It's just information.
Copy !req
2089. Look, for example,
Copy !req
2090. I just got the address of the club
where we're meeting them later
Copy !req
2091. so we won't be wandering
the streets of Austin lost for an hour tonight.
Copy !req
2092. Thank you very much, Facebook.
Copy !req
2093. And I just texted my mom back.
Copy !req
2094. Oh, that's - that's groundbreaking.
Copy !req
2095. She hasn't seen you
in, like, 55 minutes.
Copy !req
2096. Oh. Oh, my God.
Copy !req
2097. Most importantly, Meg's family
just got a miniature pet pig.
Copy !req
2098. Huh.
Copy !req
2099. Okay, you're right.
Copy !req
2100. - That is a -
- Right?
Copy !req
2101. That is a really cute, tiny pig.
Copy !req
2102. Our lives can go on.
Copy !req
2103. I want one.
Copy !req
2104. Nice shot.
Copy !req
2105. Yeah, just give
the lady at the front y'all's ID's
Copy !req
2106. and, uh, she should let you in.
Copy !req
2107. - It's room 206, right?
- Mm-hmm. Right.
Copy !req
2108. - It's not, like, weird that we're staying there?
- No, it's fine.
Copy !req
2109. - Have fun.
- Thank you.
Copy !req
2110. How long have you guys been dating?
Copy !req
2111. - About three months.
- Cool.
Copy !req
2112. Yeah, we met at a party,
and it's been, you know, chill.
Copy !req
2113. - Yeah, he seems cool.
- Yeah. He is.
Copy !req
2114. - Does he go to UT too?
- Yeah.
Copy !req
2115. Cool. What is he studying?
Copy !req
2116. He's studying history and, uh, Italian?
Copy !req
2117. I think. His minor, yeah.
Copy !req
2118. - Does he wanna - Does he wanna teach?
- I don't know.
Copy !req
2119. I think - I think he's still
figuring stuff out.
Copy !req
2120. Yeah, he'll figure it out.
He's smart. Yeah, he's smart.
Copy !req
2121. So, where are you thinking about living
when you come here?
Copy !req
2122. Um, I'm not really sure yet.
Copy !req
2123. We're gonna look at apartments tomorrow.
Copy !req
2124. Um, but I know my parents sort of
were expecting me to live in a dorm.
Copy !req
2125. Yeah. But, I mean, I'm paying
my way through college
Copy !req
2126. so it doesn't really matter that much.
Copy !req
2127. Yeah, you don't have to listen
to your parents after you turn 18.
Copy !req
2128. I mean, especially if they're
not helping you financially.
Copy !req
2129. That's what I figured, yeah.
Copy !req
2130. - But, I mean, living in a dorm isn't so bad.
- Yeah.
Copy !req
2131. - I mean, especially if it's a coed dorm.
- Yeah.
Copy !req
2132. I mean, I've never been around,
like, so many cute guys at once.
Copy !req
2133. Like, college is really fun.
Copy !req
2134. - I'm excited.
- It's great, yeah.
Copy !req
2135. - Watch out.
- Oh.
Copy !req
2136. The last death at the Hoover Dam
construction site
Copy !req
2137. was his son, Patrick Tierney,
Copy !req
2138. who died on December 20, 1935,
Copy !req
2139. exactly 13 years to the day.
Copy !req
2140. See those sorority girls over there?
Copy !req
2141. I've just decided
Copy !req
2142. if you delete your Facebook page,
I'm pledging.
Copy !req
2143. Yeah, in just a few years that's you
Copy !req
2144. and that's gonna be me.
Copy !req
2145. inlaid into the terrazzo floors
was a star map -
Copy !req
2146. a celestial map of heavenly bodies
so accurately displayed
Copy !req
2147. that one could chart
the procession of the Pole Star
Copy !req
2148. 14,000 years into the future,
Copy !req
2149. such that future generations upon -
Copy !req
2150. I wonder what his deal is.
Copy !req
2151. I mean, he obviously
has money to eat here.
Copy !req
2152. He just said. He's a UT professor,
tenure and everything.
Copy !req
2153. Look at all these people.
Copy !req
2154. What are they even doing here
at 3:00 in the morning?
Copy !req
2155. What are we even doing here
at 3:00 in the morning?
Copy !req
2156. We know what we're doing here.
Queso. We have a purpose.
Copy !req
2157. Hell, yeah.
Copy !req
2158. You know, by, like, next summer
this'll just be our lives.
Copy !req
2159. Mm-hmm.
Copy !req
2160. Staying out all night
and going to shows -
Copy !req
2161. whatever we want.
Copy !req
2162. We ever gonna go to class?
Copy !req
2163. Sometimes.
Copy !req
2164. When it feels right.
When the inspiration hits.
Copy !req
2165. Only then.
Copy !req
2166. Anything else?
Copy !req
2167. - Uh - More queso?
- Yeah.
Copy !req
2168. Mm-hmm.
Copy !req
2169. Ah, Jesus.
Copy !req
2170. What?
Copy !req
2171. I don't know. Doesn't it all
seem a little overwhelming?
Copy !req
2172. I mean, college.
Copy !req
2173. I mean, I like the idea
of being away from home
Copy !req
2174. and gaining skills
and getting better at photography.
Copy !req
2175. I just - I don't know.
Copy !req
2176. I'm not counting on it being
some big transformative experience.
Copy !req
2177. I don't think it's that transformative.
Copy !req
2178. I just see it as the next step.
Copy !req
2179. But it's like a preordained slot
Copy !req
2180. that's already got your name
and number on it.
Copy !req
2181. I don't think
it's the key to my future.
Copy !req
2182. 'Cause - I mean, look at my mom.
Copy !req
2183. She got her degree
and got a pretty good job.
Copy !req
2184. She can pay her bills.
Copy !req
2185. Well, I like your mom.
Copy !req
2186. Well, I like my mom too.
I just mean -
Copy !req
2187. Basically, she's still just
as fucking confused as I am.
Copy !req
2188. - Thank you.
- Thanks.
Copy !req
2189. - Hello?
- Hey.
Copy !req
2190. Um, did, uh - did Sam tell you
we were gonna stay here?
Copy !req
2191. - No.
- Sorry.
Copy !req
2192. Um, she, uh - she said you were
out of town for the weekend.
Copy !req
2193. Yeah, I was. I just got back.
Copy !req
2194. Are you her brother?
Copy !req
2195. Yeah. I'm - I'm Mason.
Copy !req
2196. Um, this is Sheena.
Copy !req
2197. Hello.
Copy !req
2198. Uh, great. All right.
Copy !req
2199. I'm gonna leave my stuff here, if it's okay,
and get something to eat.
Copy !req
2200. - I'll just come back in a little bit.
- Yeah, yeah.
Copy !req
2201. We have to - We have to get out
of here soon anyway, so -
Copy !req
2202. All right. It's nice meeting you.
Copy !req
2203. - Yeah. You too.
- Sorry.
Copy !req
2204. Oh, my God.
Copy !req
2205. - That was so awkward.
- I know.
Copy !req
2206. Mason. Silver medal winner.
Copy !req
2207. - Congratulations.
- Thank you.
Copy !req
2208. - Heard you got a scholarship.
- Yeah.
Copy !req
2209. Yeah, every little bit helps, you know.
Copy !req
2210. - Yeah. When you gonna go out there?
- End of the summer, I think.
Copy !req
2211. You know, work some more
before then,
Copy !req
2212. try to save up some money, at least.
Copy !req
2213. - Yeah, before you have to fend for yourself.
- Yeah.
Copy !req
2214. - Yeah, that's the idea.
- Yeah.
Copy !req
2215. Well, how are you feeling about it?
Copy !req
2216. Excited, you know.
But kind of half excited, half terrified.
Copy !req
2217. - Yeah, kind of that voluptuous panic.
- Yeah. Exactly.
Copy !req
2218. Well, it's gonna be good.
It's gonna be crazy good.
Copy !req
2219. I liked college
a lot better than high school.
Copy !req
2220. You kind of find your people
in college, you know?
Copy !req
2221. - Exactly.
- Yeah.
Copy !req
2222. Well, you'll be fine.
You got a good heart.
Copy !req
2223. Just follow your heart. Yeah?
Copy !req
2224. - Thanks.
- Good luck.
Copy !req
2225. Don't forget to floss.
Copy !req
2226. I just don't get why you're
being so fucking childish.
Copy !req
2227. I'm not being childish.
Copy !req
2228. You're the one who made it into
this big thing by telling everyone.
Copy !req
2229. I haven't told anyone.
Copy !req
2230. So Cynthia just magically knows
you're going to the prom with this loser
Copy !req
2231. even though you're
not dating him anymore?
Copy !req
2232. She's my best friend.
Copy !req
2233. Well, your best friend
has a big fucking mouth.
Copy !req
2234. Well, take it up with her then.
Copy !req
2235. Why don't you just tell Miss Fuckin'
Rubber Jaws she can keep on talking
Copy !req
2236. as long as she includes the truth,
Copy !req
2237. which is that we wouldn't
be having this conversation
Copy !req
2238. if your college boyfriend
weren't out of town this weekend.
Copy !req
2239. You had already bought the tickets.
It's just prom. It's not like it matters.
Copy !req
2240. I'm just trying to be friends with you.
Copy !req
2241. Oh, it's just humiliating.
I can't - I can't do that.
Copy !req
2242. Mr. I-Don't-Care-What-
Anyone-Else-Thinks-Of-Me.
Copy !req
2243. Fuck anyone else.
I care what I think of me,
Copy !req
2244. which isn't much right now.
Copy !req
2245. King of the pity prom.
Copy !req
2246. Fine. We're not going.
Copy !req
2247. Great.
Copy !req
2248. Why are we even -
Copy !req
2249. I mean, we both knew this was coming.
Copy !req
2250. I'm just the one
who did something about it.
Copy !req
2251. Yeah, fucking some college guy.
Copy !req
2252. Oh, fuck you.
Copy !req
2253. I don't regret anything.
Copy !req
2254. Of course you don't.
Copy !req
2255. You know,
it's actually kind of a relief
Copy !req
2256. not to have to be around someone
who's so gloomy all the time.
Copy !req
2257. The world's not so horrible.
Copy !req
2258. Not everything's some big conspiracy
against humanity.
Copy !req
2259. It's great that you can think that way.
Copy !req
2260. You know, I'm sure dating a jock
really helps to clear the mind.
Copy !req
2261. He's not a jock, okay? He just happens
to be on the lacrosse team.
Copy !req
2262. We're all going to other schools
next year anyway.
Copy !req
2263. So it's not some
super serious relationship.
Copy !req
2264. Great. I feel so much better now.
Copy !req
2265. We're just having fun.
Copy !req
2266. I bet he's having fun.
Copy !req
2267. Grow up, Mason.
Copy !req
2268. It's not like I haven't been
with anyone else.
Copy !req
2269. Who?
Copy !req
2270. What do you care?
Copy !req
2271. Who?
Copy !req
2272. Does it matter?
Copy !req
2273. You're the one who brought it up.
Copy !req
2274. This is pointless.
Copy !req
2275. Now you're just trying to be an asshole.
Copy !req
2276. Holy crap. I would rather have
my balls clawed off
Copy !req
2277. than ever sit through
anything like that ever again.
Copy !req
2278. Well, we never, ever have to.
Copy !req
2279. Oh, my God. Thank you.
Copy !req
2280. - Give me that.
- Dude, it's all you.
Copy !req
2281. Drink up.
Copy !req
2282. So you coming out with me tonight, brother?
Copy !req
2283. Should be some
pretty awesome stuff happening.
Copy !req
2284. Nah, dude. I'm going to this, like,
show with my dad in Austin.
Copy !req
2285. His friend's playing.
Copy !req
2286. God, have fun with that, I guess.
Copy !req
2287. Fuck, there's so many cars here.
I don't wanna go in there.
Copy !req
2288. Dude, you will have so much fun.
Copy !req
2289. Your family loves you.
Copy !req
2290. You're gonna have a swell time.
Copy !req
2291. Fuck you.
You're coming in with me.
Copy !req
2292. - Oh, no. Shit, no.
- Yes.
Copy !req
2293. Yes, you are. My mom loves you.
You have to say hi.
Copy !req
2294. Just -
Copy !req
2295. - Do you wanna hurt her feelings?
- Mm-mmm.
Copy !req
2296. Well, then let's - let's go get 'em.
Copy !req
2297. Just for a second. Just a second, seriously.
Copy !req
2298. You know, you're in sort of -
you're in enemy territory here.
Copy !req
2299. We're aware.
Copy !req
2300. Oh. Look who's here.
Copy !req
2301. Whoo!
Copy !req
2302. Hey!
Copy !req
2303. Get a job!
Copy !req
2304. No, no, no, no, wait.
We're gonna take pictures. Put it back on.
Copy !req
2305. My hug.
Copy !req
2306. - Hey, can you get a camera?
- I have it.
Copy !req
2307. I don't know you.
But congratulations.
Copy !req
2308. All right. Look here.
Copy !req
2309. - Smile.
- Here we go.
Copy !req
2310. Oh, that's a good one.
Copy !req
2311. And - Good. Got it.
Copy !req
2312. Oh, we need - Sam, where are you?
Copy !req
2313. - Samantha!
- Sam.
Copy !req
2314. Where's Mason Sr.?
Copy !req
2315. I'm feeling generous.
Come here.
Copy !req
2316. Great. And -
Copy !req
2317. Beautiful.
Copy !req
2318. I'll e-mail these to everyone.
Copy !req
2319. - Whoo!
- Don't even start. Don't start. Don't start.
Copy !req
2320. Can't believe you guys came all this way.
It means a lot to me.
Copy !req
2321. Mmm. We wouldn't have
missed it for anything.
Copy !req
2322. I'm so proud of you.
Copy !req
2323. Congratulations.
Copy !req
2324. I'm really sorry that Lee couldn't be here.
Copy !req
2325. - He's on his senior trip.
- No, no, no.
Copy !req
2326. - Tell him I said hi.
- I will.
Copy !req
2327. Abby, I didn't even recognize you.
How old are you now?
Copy !req
2328. - I'm 13.
- Wow.
Copy !req
2329. Everybody just died laughing!
Copy !req
2330. All right, let's top her off.
Copy !req
2331. You want some, doll?
Copy !req
2332. Um, sure. Whatever.
Copy !req
2333. - Yeah. Absolutely.
- MR.I got you something.
Copy !req
2334. - What is it?
- That is a savings bond.
Copy !req
2335. That is worth something.
It's better than money. You just spend that.
Copy !req
2336. God. Is that your mom?
Copy !req
2337. - Yeah, yeah. That's her.
- Wow.
Copy !req
2338. It'll be - Three-second rule.
Put it on your plate.
Copy !req
2339. - Such a great dad.
- I know. I'm trying to help.
Copy !req
2340. Come here, you guys.
I wanna make a little toast to Mason.
Copy !req
2341. - Whoo! Yeah!
- All right!
Copy !req
2342. Now, Mason, I know you didn't really
wanna have a party today,
Copy !req
2343. but... we did.
Copy !req
2344. And you only graduate high school
once in your life.
Copy !req
2345. So I wanna celebrate you
and this next phase.
Copy !req
2346. And you're gonna learn
so much in college.
Copy !req
2347. You're gonna have so much fun.
You're gonna have inspiring teachers.
Copy !req
2348. You're gonna learn more about your art.
Copy !req
2349. I love you, babe. So proud of you.
Copy !req
2350. - To Mason.
- To Mason!
Copy !req
2351. Hear! Hear!
Copy !req
2352. - To Mason.
- Hear! Hear!
Copy !req
2353. All right, you're up, kid.
Copy !req
2354. Oh, uh - All right, uh -
Copy !req
2355. Well, Mason,
I'll make a toast to the future.
Copy !req
2356. To your future.
Copy !req
2357. It's been a little sketchy,
this end of the school year here,
Copy !req
2358. trying to figure out
what school to go to.
Copy !req
2359. Mason told me that, uh, he wanted
Copy !req
2360. to get as far away
from home as possible
Copy !req
2361. but still honor our agreement
Copy !req
2362. that we pay in-state tuition,
which I do appreciate.
Copy !req
2363. He's a prudent man,
and he's gonna have a great future.
Copy !req
2364. So here's to you, buddy.
Copy !req
2365. - Whoo!
- Future!
Copy !req
2366. - Hear! Hear!
- Congratulations.
Copy !req
2367. Mason Jr.
Copy !req
2368. High school graduate, 18 and straight.
Copy !req
2369. Just ignore him. My brother needs
to learn to pace himself.
Copy !req
2370. Well, I've not known you
as long as everybody here.
Copy !req
2371. But, uh - uh, since I have known you,
uh, you've grown a lot.
Copy !req
2372. And, uh, I-I - I don't know -
I'm proud of you.
Copy !req
2373. So if this photography thing
doesn't work out,
Copy !req
2374. you know you always got a job.
Copy !req
2375. Lose that earring.
Copy !req
2376. But, uh, you know, maybe I can
get you in front of house.
Copy !req
2377. All right. To you, buddy.
Copy !req
2378. - Sam, say something.
- Come on, Sam.
Copy !req
2379. - Um -
Come on, darlin'.
Copy !req
2380. Good luck.
Copy !req
2381. Yeah, Mason!
Copy !req
2382. Congratulations.
Copy !req
2383. Aw!
Copy !req
2384. So, you broke up with your girlfriend?
Copy !req
2385. Yeah. Yeah, just recently.
Copy !req
2386. - What was her name?
- Sheena.
Copy !req
2387. Sheena.
Copy !req
2388. She's gonna go to college with you?
Copy !req
2389. - No.
- No.
Copy !req
2390. - No.
- She's staying in this part of Texas.
Copy !req
2391. Oh, okay.
You need a ride to college?
Copy !req
2392. Oh!
Copy !req
2393. I just wanted to say hello before you got
out of here. I haven't gotten a chance.
Copy !req
2394. You guys met before, haven't you?
Annie and Jen?
Copy !req
2395. - Yeah, yeah, we met at, uh, Sam's graduation.
- Oh, yeah.
Copy !req
2396. And with your little one. Where is he?
Copy !req
2397. - Oh, he's at home.
- Yeah, yeah.
Copy !req
2398. Remember, he was such a pain
at Sam's thing that, you know -
Copy !req
2399. Oh, I would love to see him.
Copy !req
2400. Well, we have a special weekend
this weekend, so -
Copy !req
2401. I'm so glad you found her.
I really am.
Copy !req
2402. You - You've got him
at a good time, I think.
Copy !req
2403. - I think so too.
- Yeah.
Copy !req
2404. - It's good to see you too.
- Nice to see you too, Jen.
Copy !req
2405. - I'm so proud of your boy.
- Yeah. Yeah, we all are.
Copy !req
2406. - If you think she's a bitch now,
you should have seen her -
Copy !req
2407. You got to remember,
you're going to college, though, all right?
Copy !req
2408. And if you're anything like me
or your old man,
Copy !req
2409. you're gonna be pulling down
some serious wool.
Copy !req
2410. - You're gonna be tapping some masterful gap.
- Steven.
Copy !req
2411. You're gonna be doing
some good work out there.
Copy !req
2412. Think about it.
An awful lot of flowers in that bouquet.
Copy !req
2413. But you got to do me a favor.
Copy !req
2414. You're gonna be vulnerable
this summer, all right?
Copy !req
2415. Remember to use protection
during breakup sex.
Copy !req
2416. This guy knows exactly of which I speak.
Copy !req
2417. - Look what happened to him. Voilà.
- Steven.
Copy !req
2418. Cheers.
Copy !req
2419. It - It's not that simple.
Copy !req
2420. Four more years.
Copy !req
2421. Four more years.
Copy !req
2422. I'm just saying.
Copy !req
2423. Do y'all recycle?
Copy !req
2424. - Should I -
- I have one started there.
Copy !req
2425. Oh, yeah, right. Okay.
Copy !req
2426. Am I, uh - Am I your only ex at this party?
Copy !req
2427. Yes. I'm not your only wife here though.
Copy !req
2428. Yeah.
Copy !req
2429. Can you believe
they're both out of high school?
Copy !req
2430. No.
Copy !req
2431. No, I can't.
Copy !req
2432. You did a great job
with both of them, by the way.
Copy !req
2433. Thanks for saying that.
Copy !req
2434. I never thought I'd hear you say that.
Copy !req
2435. Well, it's true. Thank you.
Copy !req
2436. You're doing it all over again, huh?
Copy !req
2437. I know. I know, right?
Copy !req
2438. It's gonna be, uh, 15 years
till I have an empty nest.
Copy !req
2439. Hmm.
Copy !req
2440. But hey, I'd love to pitch in,
help with this, if I could.
Copy !req
2441. It's so great that you did this.
Copy !req
2442. Can I just give you a little -
Copy !req
2443. - I'd appreciate it if I could -
- Sure. Yeah.
Copy !req
2444. Yeah. But I don't have any cash.
Copy !req
2445. No, it's in Annie's purse.
I'll be right back.
Copy !req
2446. So it sucks. I mean, the guy's
a college lacrosse player.
Copy !req
2447. - I mean, what are you gonna do?
- She didn't even like sports.
Copy !req
2448. - You want a beer?
- No, that's all right.
Copy !req
2449. - You can have one.
- It's all right.
Copy !req
2450. Yeah, well, for what it's worth,
Copy !req
2451. we've all been through the exact
same thing at one point or another.
Copy !req
2452. It's not the same though.
Copy !req
2453. - I mean, you never got to know her.
- No, I know.
Copy !req
2454. It's not the same.
Copy !req
2455. I just don't know what I did wrong.
Copy !req
2456. Hey, Jimmy. Hey, man. Hey.
Copy !req
2457. Hey, Mason.
Copy !req
2458. We're up here, uh, raiding the green room.
Hope that's okay.
Copy !req
2459. - That's totally cool.
- All right.
Copy !req
2460. Wow. Is that M.J.?
Copy !req
2461. Uh-huh. Right?
Copy !req
2462. Unbelievable.
Copy !req
2463. Well, we just decided to come a little early,
check you out.
Copy !req
2464. That's cool, man. Let me finish up.
I'll be up in a minute.
Copy !req
2465. All right. All right. I guarantee you,
you didn't do anything wrong.
Copy !req
2466. These high school love things,
they never work out.
Copy !req
2467. Here, come here.
Copy !req
2468. I mean, everybody's
just changing so much, you know?
Copy !req
2469. The odds of two young people
staying on the same wavelength are -
Copy !req
2470. - Yeah, but still -
- Look, and I also guarantee you
Copy !req
2471. that every day of your life
that you spend crying over some silly girl
Copy !req
2472. is a complete waste of time.
Copy !req
2473. She wasn't a silly girl though.
Copy !req
2474. I mean, she's a serious person.
Copy !req
2475. I really thought we were -
Copy !req
2476. - What?
- I don't know.
Copy !req
2477. Women are never satisfied. Okay?
Copy !req
2478. They're always looking
to potentially trade up,
Copy !req
2479. and that's, I'm sorry to say,
Copy !req
2480. what I think has happened to you,
my fine-feathered friend.
Copy !req
2481. What does that even mean?
Copy !req
2482. It means don't hand over the controls
to your self-esteem to Sheila.
Copy !req
2483. - Sheena.
- All right, it means you are responsible for you,
Copy !req
2484. not your girlfriend,
not your mom, not me.
Copy !req
2485. You. And if you truly
take care of you,
Copy !req
2486. you will be amazed
at how much girls like Sheena
Copy !req
2487. start lining up at your front door.
Copy !req
2488. Great.
Copy !req
2489. Yeah, you know, you just got to separate
yourself from the pack in some way.
Copy !req
2490. Excel at something, you know,
Copy !req
2491. and then you have your pick of the litter
Copy !req
2492. when them front-running hussies
start sniffing around.
Copy !req
2493. So what you're saying is
I should take up lacrosse.
Copy !req
2494. Exactly. Or you could,
you know, start a band.
Copy !req
2495. Worked for me a long time ago.
Copy !req
2496. I think it's still working for Jimmy.
Copy !req
2497. Or you just keep taking pictures.
Copy !req
2498. She hated the pictures I took of her.
Copy !req
2499. All right.
I'm sick to death of her, okay?
Copy !req
2500. I only met her a few times.
And, yes, she was cute, all right?
Copy !req
2501. But truth be told,
I always thought she was a little bit -
Copy !req
2502. you know,
a little bit too square for you.
Copy !req
2503. You know, not quite the same vibe.
Copy !req
2504. - You really thought that?
- On some subtle, lower level.
Copy !req
2505. I mean, uh,
Copy !req
2506. I wasn't surprised when it turned out
Copy !req
2507. she was interested in some
knucklehead lacrosse player, okay?
Copy !req
2508. I mean, the bottom line is
Copy !req
2509. it's all timing with these things.
Copy !req
2510. Yeah.
Copy !req
2511. I mean, uh, take your mom and me.
Copy !req
2512. I think I've probably turned
into the boring castrated guy
Copy !req
2513. she wanted me to be
15, 20 years ago, you know?
Copy !req
2514. I'm not saying she was wrong
to be pissed. I'm not.
Copy !req
2515. I'm just saying that she could've
been a little more patient,
Copy !req
2516. a little more forgiving.
Copy !req
2517. Would've saved me that parade
of drunken assholes.
Copy !req
2518. So what's the point?
Copy !req
2519. Of what?
Copy !req
2520. I don't know. Any of this. Everything.
Copy !req
2521. Everything?
Copy !req
2522. What's the point?
I mean, I sure as shit don't know.
Copy !req
2523. Neither does anybody else, okay?
Copy !req
2524. We're all just... winging it, you know?
Copy !req
2525. The good news is you're feeling stuff.
Copy !req
2526. You know?
And you got to hold on to that.
Copy !req
2527. You do. I mean, you get older
and you don't feel as much.
Copy !req
2528. Your skin gets tougher.
Copy !req
2529. The point is those pictures you took -
Copy !req
2530. thousands of submissions
from all over the state, and you won.
Copy !req
2531. Well, I got silver.
Copy !req
2532. - And nine other people did too.
- I'm gonna kill you.
Copy !req
2533. I'm trying to tell you that I believe in you, Mason.
I think you're really special.
Copy !req
2534. And if some girl doesn't see that,
then fuck her, you know?
Copy !req
2535. Hey, this next one goes out
to a young man in the house.
Copy !req
2536. - Whoo-hoo!
- Known him since he was just a small boy.
Copy !req
2537. Now he's all graduated from high school
and making me feel old.
Copy !req
2538. Happy high school graduation, Mason.
Copy !req
2539. Thank you.
Copy !req
2540. Okay, guys, let's be clear.
Copy !req
2541. I'm gonna break this into four categories.
Copy !req
2542. One - anything you wanna keep
from your childhood and you're taking with you.
Copy !req
2543. Two - throwing away.
Copy !req
2544. Three - donating.
Copy !req
2545. Four - whatever you wanna try to sell
at the garage sale next weekend.
Copy !req
2546. Whatever we don't sell, we're donating.
Copy !req
2547. Doesn't the apartment have,
like, an attic or storage or something?
Copy !req
2548. No. You're missing the point.
Copy !req
2549. We're not gonna drag a bunch of crap
to Mom's tiny apartment.
Copy !req
2550. Can't believe we're moving again.
Copy !req
2551. No, I'm moving.
You moved two years ago.
Copy !req
2552. You have an apartment in Austin.
Copy !req
2553. Mason is moving in the fall.
Copy !req
2554. I'm done.
Copy !req
2555. This will be great for me.
I'll have all these options.
Copy !req
2556. I can take a sabbatical.
Copy !req
2557. I can get some writing done,
try to get published.
Copy !req
2558. What about Christmas though?
What are we gonna do?
Copy !req
2559. I'm not sharing a room with him.
Copy !req
2560. One of you will sleep on the couch,
Copy !req
2561. and we'll use that blow-up mattress.
Copy !req
2562. How am I supposed to do my laundry?
Copy !req
2563. Sam, I'm gently pushing you
out of the nest.
Copy !req
2564. And on your way down,
Copy !req
2565. you may magically find some quarters
Copy !req
2566. that you use to do laundry
in your own apartment.
Copy !req
2567. Come on, you guys are adults.
Copy !req
2568. You need to take some responsibility.
Copy !req
2569. Now, what do you want?
Copy !req
2570. I'm gonna get the veggie burger.
Copy !req
2571. I'm not having anything.
I'm not hungry.
Copy !req
2572. What's wrong with you?
Copy !req
2573. I'm sick.
Copy !req
2574. What is it, your head?
Do you have a fever?
Copy !req
2575. She's pregnant.
Copy !req
2576. No. To be honest,
I drank way too much last night.
Copy !req
2577. - You weren't driving, were you?
- No. No.
Copy !req
2578. Carrie's back home, too,
and we just hung out.
Copy !req
2579. You know, peach Smirnoffs,
they just go down so easy.
Copy !req
2580. No, no. Hey. That's not an excuse.
Copy !req
2581. You could still pack boxes.
Copy !req
2582. These people wanna move in
as soon as possible.
Copy !req
2583. Hi, guys. I'm Ernesto. How are you?
Copy !req
2584. Uh, you probably don't remember me,
Copy !req
2585. but I worked on your septic line years ago.
Copy !req
2586. Oh, yeah.
Copy !req
2587. Believe it or not, you changed my life.
Copy !req
2588. You told me that day that I was smart
and that I should go to school.
Copy !req
2589. I took your advice.
Copy !req
2590. I signed up for English classes,
Copy !req
2591. and then a year later I went to community
college, and I got my associate's degree.
Copy !req
2592. I'm working on my bachelor's now
at Texas State
Copy !req
2593. and also one of the managers here.
Copy !req
2594. That's great.
Copy !req
2595. Uh, it's good to see you.
Copy !req
2596. Because I really wanted a chance
to-to thank you for that. Gracias.
Copy !req
2597. It really meant a lot to me.
Copy !req
2598. Don't worry about lunch.
Copy !req
2599. - It's on me. It's the least I can do.
- Thanks.
Copy !req
2600. You guys should listen to her.
She's a smart lady.
Copy !req
2601. Thank you.
Copy !req
2602. Isn't that kind of crazy, though,
Copy !req
2603. that a computer knows who you are
from just 20 questions off a form?
Copy !req
2604. I guess there are really only, like,
eight types of people in the world.
Copy !req
2605. I mean, there are subsets,
like male and female,
Copy !req
2606. but apparently we're not as unique
as we wanna think we are.
Copy !req
2607. Have you even talked to this guy yet?
Copy !req
2608. No, but we've been trading e-mails.
Copy !req
2609. He seems pretty cool.
Copy !req
2610. He's studying literature
and anthropology.
Copy !req
2611. And he's way into Bright Eyes,
so that's not so bad.
Copy !req
2612. But anyways, he was telling me
Copy !req
2613. about how the system they use
for assigning roommates
Copy !req
2614. is kind of spooky.
Copy !req
2615. Like, the freshman satisfaction rate
for new roommates
Copy !req
2616. used to be, like, 60%.
Copy !req
2617. And now it's a hundred...
just 'cause of the computer.
Copy !req
2618. Well, sounds like he'll
be a good roommate then.
Copy !req
2619. Yeah.
Copy !req
2620. But we've pretty much decided that soon
they won't even need a questionnaire
Copy !req
2621. 'cause they'll just let
the NSA scan your digital ghost,
Copy !req
2622. and they'll tell you who your roommate is
Copy !req
2623. based on everything you've ever said,
written or clicked.
Copy !req
2624. Did you - Did you put this in here again?
Copy !req
2625. I don't want it.
Copy !req
2626. Come on, it's the first picture
you ever took.
Copy !req
2627. Well, I mean, all the more reason
to leave it behind, right?
Copy !req
2628. - What?
- Nothing.
Copy !req
2629. No, what is it?
Copy !req
2630. Nothing.
Copy !req
2631. Mom.
Copy !req
2632. This is the worst day of my life.
Copy !req
2633. - What are you talking about?
- I knew this day was coming.
Copy !req
2634. I didn't know you were gonna be
so fucking happy to be leaving.
Copy !req
2635. I mean, it's not that I'm that happy.
Copy !req
2636. What do you -
What do you expect?
Copy !req
2637. You know what I'm realizing?
My life is just gonna go - like that.
Copy !req
2638. This series of milestones.
Copy !req
2639. Getting married, having kids, getting divorced.
Copy !req
2640. The time that we thought you were dyslexic.
Copy !req
2641. When I taught you how to ride a bike.
Copy !req
2642. Getting divorced again.
Copy !req
2643. Getting my master's degree.
Copy !req
2644. Finally getting the job I wanted.
Copy !req
2645. Sending Samantha off to college.
Sending you off to college.
Copy !req
2646. You know what's next? Huh?
Copy !req
2647. It's my fucking funeral.
Copy !req
2648. Just go, and leave my picture!
Copy !req
2649. Aren't you jumping ahead
by, like, 40 years or something?
Copy !req
2650. I just thought there would be more.
Copy !req
2651. Hey, you must be Mason.
Copy !req
2652. Yeah. Dalton, right?
Copy !req
2653. - Yeah, man, it's nice to finally meet you.
- Definitely.
Copy !req
2654. - Uh, you cool with this side of the room?
- Yeah.
Copy !req
2655. Got in this morning.
Just moved my shit in, man.
Copy !req
2656. - Well, yeah. I don't - I don't care. No worries.
- Cool.
Copy !req
2657. Can I help you with anything, man?
Any bags?
Copy !req
2658. I just got, like, one box left.
I packed pretty light.
Copy !req
2659. - But I appreciate it.
- My pleasure, man. Of course.
Copy !req
2660. Um, are you going
to the orientation mixer thing?
Copy !req
2661. Orientation mixer thing?
Fuck no, man.
Copy !req
2662. I'm not going to that,
and neither are you, by the way.
Copy !req
2663. - We got way better stuff to be doing.
- All right.
Copy !req
2664. - You ready?
- Yeah.
Copy !req
2665. Hey, Barb, this is my roommate, Mason.
Mason, Barb.
Copy !req
2666. - Hi.
- Hey.
Copy !req
2667. - You comin' with us?
- Where are you going?
Copy !req
2668. - Hiking.
- Yeah, man, you should come.
Copy !req
2669. If we leave now, we can catch
the late afternoon at Big Bend.
Copy !req
2670. - You ever been before, man?
- Yeah, but not since I was really little.
Copy !req
2671. Oh, well, then all the more reason
to come now, man.
Copy !req
2672. That's why we're here, dude.
Copy !req
2673. Oh, Mason.
This is Nicole, Barb's roommate.
Copy !req
2674. Hey, what's up?
Copy !req
2675. Hi.
Copy !req
2676. Mason, Nicole.
Copy !req
2677. - So, you game?
- Sure.
Copy !req
2678. Here. Have the rest of this.
Copy !req
2679. Got it timed perfectly.
Copy !req
2680. It'll kick in when we get to the mountains.
Copy !req
2681. - Awesome.
- Let's go.
Copy !req
2682. Do they let you major in that here?
Copy !req
2683. Well, it's not that serious here,
Copy !req
2684. so I kind of, like, train
outside of the university,
Copy !req
2685. but I'm taking all my basics
like History of Dance and all that.
Copy !req
2686. - Nice.
- Yeah.
Copy !req
2687. - What do you teach?
- Oh, gosh.
Copy !req
2688. - Uh, ballet, tap, jazz, lyrical, hip-hop.
- Wow.
Copy !req
2689. Which one's your favorite?
Copy !req
2690. - Tap.
- Yeah?
Copy !req
2691. Yeah. You get to, like, make up all
your own sounds, and there's no rules.
Copy !req
2692. And just, like, creative freedom.
Copy !req
2693. - That's great.
- Yeah.
Copy !req
2694. That's why I love teaching it
Copy !req
2695. 'cause it's so beautiful to me
Copy !req
2696. and it's kind of dying away
in this generation,
Copy !req
2697. so to be a part of, like,
bringing it back to the kids -
Copy !req
2698. - Right.
- It's really rewarding.
Copy !req
2699. - Yeah.
- How old are they?
Copy !req
2700. - Six to eight.
- Wow.
Copy !req
2701. Yeah. They have, like, no fear,
Copy !req
2702. and they're not self-conscious at all.
Copy !req
2703. They haven't reached
the awkward years yet.
Copy !req
2704. Yeah, not yet. It's coming.
Copy !req
2705. - Hey.
- Hey.
Copy !req
2706. Dalton can be crazy sometimes.
Copy !req
2707. - He seems cool though.
- Yeah.
Copy !req
2708. Yeah, they're both really cool.
Copy !req
2709. How are you feeling?
Copy !req
2710. Great.
Copy !req
2711. Really great, to be honest.
Copy !req
2712. Good.
Copy !req
2713. I'm really happy
that you're hangin' out with us.
Copy !req
2714. Yeah.
Copy !req
2715. Me too.
Copy !req
2716. This moment's having a multiple orgasm.
Copy !req
2717. It-It's as if all of time
has unfolded before us
Copy !req
2718. so we could stand here
and look out and scream, "Fuck yeah!"
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2719. Whoo!
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2720. You know how everyone's always saying,
"Seize the moment"?
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2721. I don't know. I'm kind of thinking
it's the other way around.
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2722. You know, like, the moment seizes us.
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2723. Yeah.
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2724. Yeah, I know. It's -
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2725. It's constant, the moments.
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2726. It's just -
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2727. It's like it's always right now, you know?
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2728. Yeah.
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