Beware! The Blob (1972)

1. Hey, did you get my salmon eggs?

2. Yes, honey, I have your salmon eggs.

3. I had to go to three different places to get them,

4. but I found them.

5. Hey, did you get any beer?

6. Why don't you look in your tackle box, Chester?

7. No.

8. In my tackle box.

9. What she'll be putting in my tackle box next.

10. Tackle...

11. Did you score, baby?

12. I always score, baby.

13. Oh, you're beautiful.

14. Last of the month.

15. Ah, ecology.

16. Bless you.

17. Ahh.

18. Mm.

19. I tell you, it makes a man glad to be alive.

20. Hm.

21. Ahh.

22. What is this?

23. What is it?

24. No! On second thought, don't tell me what it is.

25. Honey, this is our home.

26. Things that we eat go in that refrigerator.

27. Oh, you're making a whole big thing out of it.

28. For all you know, I could be doing you a great big favor.

29. You'd be doing me a favor

30. if you'd stay home awhile.

31. You've been gone three whole months.

32. Three months.

33. And just putting down a pipeline

34. that absolutely nobody wants.

35. And the first thing you do when you get home,

36. you go fishing.

37. You know that's not the first thing I did

38. when I got back home.

39. Oh, Chester, I'm so glad you're home!

40. Oh! That thing is freezing!

41. Oh! Ooh, ooh, ooh! Ooh!

42. I hate a blue behind.

43. - Let me kiss it... - Chester, you know what?

44. You are a total ding-a-ling.

45. - What the hell is in there? - That's a sample.

46. One of my bulldozer men just pushed it right out

47. of the permafrost.

48. I want to keep it frozen till I get to the lab.

49. My dear, you may keep it frozen anyplace

50. but in my refrigerator.

51. Here, Chester, here's your beer,

52. and in there is your tackle box

53. and all your fishing equipment.

54. Go.

55. - Remember... - Yes?

56. You denied me.

57. I never did deny you.

58. You did when you got me this beer.

59. Ahh.

60. Oh, every time I go to the store,

61. I got more stuff than I got the time before.

62. That's really incredible.

63. I don't know what I'm...

64. There, yes.

65. Yes, I know.

66. Oh, poor sweetie.

67. Poor sweetie.

68. Yes. You're gonna get dinner.

69. You're gonna get dinner, don't panic.

70. Okay, wait, first, you have to let go of Mommy's shirt

71. or nobody's gonna get any.

72. All right, now, you hold right there.

73. It's coming.

74. Look at that, sardines.

75. You're gonna have sardines.

76. You can't go over the side.

77. You have to stay right there and smell it.

78. Smell it, mm-hm, yes.

79. Wait a minute.

80. Wait a minute.

81. Wait.

82. Is that motivation for you?

83. Does that activate your glands?

84. Now, let's see what we got here.

85. Let's see if we can't get this open.

86. Wait a minute, wait a minute now.

87. All right, all right, all right.

88. Here.

89. Oh, I know.

90. You're just ravenous.

91. Just wait for Mommy, please.

92. Don't be like that.

93. Wait one second, over here.

94. I'm really, really crazy today.

95. Sam, you've been eating since we got you.

96. Okay, now, here.

97. There.

98. There you go.

99. Yes, that poor baby was absolutely ravenous,

100. really starving.

101. Your mommy treat you badly?

102. No.

103. That's right.

104. Just stuff your face.

105. Absolutely make a pig of yourself.

106. Do you have a secret life?

107. I bet you have a secret life.

108. Poor baby.

109. You were neglected.

110. You were neglected.

111. Chester!

112. Hey, baby, listen...

113. Never a dull moment, never a dull moment.

114. - Have a little drink. - Very helpful.

115. This is to your return here. To your return.

116. My little jolly sleigh bell, hurry back.

117. Yes, because your baby missed you.

118. I want to show you what I made for Bobby.

119. They're coveralls and they're really, really spectacular.

120. Look at this.

121. Hey, they are spectacular, they're beautiful.

122. Isn't that great? Look at all that stuff.

123. I love 'em, they're great.

124. Lisa and I are thinking about

125. really going into business.

126. Oh, that's marvelous. I figure, together,

127. you ought to make about 37 cents an hour.

128. Hey, what's with the television set?

129. What do you mean "what's with the television set?"

130. I don't know. I didn't have it on

131. the entire time you were gone.

132. Oh, you mean you just sat there and pined away the both of you?

133. Yes.

134. Oh, I did, I pined, I pined.

135. Oh, that's wonderful.

136. Listen, I got to go next door.

137. If Lisa comes for these,

138. tell her that they're on top of the garbage can

139. in front of the back door, okay?

140. And pine while you're gone.

141. Samuel?

142. What is this?

143. Oh, Samuel, you broke my 49-cent thing.

144. I really did like that thing.

145. You're a bad cat, you really are.

146. Can you boys give us a hand clearing this area?

147. Sure.

148. Oh, I didn't spend $3 million on a TV set.

149. All of them are the same.

150. Chester?

151. Chester!

152. For Lisa, the box is right here.

153. Remember what I said? It's right here.

154. Great communication, just great.

155. All right, be back in a second.

156. Samuel?

157. Samuel?

158. What's going on with that cat?

159. Sam?

160. Here, puss. Here, puss.

161. Here, kitty, kitty.

162. Here, kitty. Here, kitty.

163. Here, come on, Sam.

164. Where are you?

165. Sam?

166. Here, kitty. Here, kitty, kitty.

167. Bet you're after those birds again.

168. I know your story.

169. Here, kitty.

170. Here, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty.

171. Sam?

172. Sam?

173. Come here, come here.

174. Samuel, where are you?

175. What is this?

176. Chester!

177. Les?

178. Les?

179. Leslie?

180. What?

181. I'm gonna go over to Mariane's to get Bobby's present.

182. Okay, but you better hurry up.

183. The party is very soon.

184. Okay.

185. Oh, do we need anything else for the party?

186. Well, let's see now.

187. No, just Bobby.

188. Yeah, oh, do you think it's gonna be hard

189. to get him over here?

190. Oh, I don't think so.

191. Salutations, salutations.

192. I see you've got everything done, decorations.

193. - Brownies I made. - Oh, lovely.

194. I'm gonna go over to Mariane's and Chester's

195. to get Bobby's present.

196. Oh, wow, I forgot to get Bobby a present.

197. Hm, now I know why.

198. Hey, do you think you'll have any trouble

199. getting Bobby here?

200. I mean, it won't be much of a party without him.

201. Oh, it's gonna be no problem.

202. I might have to really lay it on thick,

203. but he won't be any problem.

204. Okay.

205. Except play along with me, okay?

206. I will.

207. - Tell everybody. - Goodbye.

208. Goodbye!

209. Bye!

210. Well, listen, if everything is together,

211. then we're gonna split, see ya later.

212. Oh, wait a minute, people are coming soon.

213. - Yeah? - Uh, well,

214. we're gonna go discover acoustics.

215. Are you sure you'll be right back?

216. - Right back. - Ciao.

217. - Bye-bye. - Bye-bye.

218. Now all the images of horror,

219. the demons of your mind crowd in on you

220. to destroy you.

221. We'll be back to our feature film in a minute,

222. but, first, ladies, do you find yourself

223. in this situation?

224. Laura, these vegetables were mutilated.

225. Well, honey, I just didn't have time.

226. I remember, let's see.

227. That's the coveralls for...

228. Hey.

229. for Lisa to pick up.

230. See that?

231. She thinks I'm dumb.

232. Mm, mm.

233. Ecology.

234. One, two, three.

235. We're going on a hike.

236. One, two, three.

237. We're going on a hike.

238. One, two, three.

239. Hold it, men! Men,

240. can any of you identify this little plant

241. that I just picked from the side of the road?

242. - Mustard! - Very good!

243. It is a mustard plant.

244. M-U-S-T-A-R-D.

245. The same kind of mustard that you find

246. on your mother's kitchen table or on your little hot dogs.

247. Now mustard is a very strong and crafty plant

248. and can survive under almost any conditions.

249. It comes from the turnip, broccoli,

250. and Water Crest Valley,

251. and I want you to remember that

252. as we go on with our hike.

253. We saw it again at that store.

254. It looks bigger now.

255. Your story has gotten bigger now, kid.

256. Hey, look at me!

257. Do I look like somebody who is playing a practical joke?

258. Am I laughing?

259. Or am I... am I scared stiff?

260. Dad spends three months away

261. and everything falls apart.

262. Enough to drive me crazy.

263. He's right, lieutenant.

264. Next thing, they'll tell me a cassette is better.

265. Color looks good.

266. Now everybody is red.

267. Your job right now is to help me restore

268. some order around here.

269. Now they're all black.

270. Now they're all green.

271. Can't I see one thing on this set?

272. This is an emergency.

273. That's all I can tell you right now.

274. They're trying to get things under control.

275. In order to do that, we have to clear this area.

276. They condition us to go crazy.

277. A radio used to be good enough.

278. Men, come on up here.

279. Men, look who's coming down the road.

280. It's our old friend, Miss Clark!

281. All right, men, let's give Miss Clark

282. our usual good day greeting.

283. Good day, Miss Clark.

284. A little louder.

285. Good day, Miss Clark!

286. - How are you, Miss Clark? - Fine, Mr. Adleman.

287. And have you had a nice day today?

288. Oh, it's been just wonderful.

289. Our usual hiking trip wouldn't be the same

290. without running into you.

291. - Right, boys? - Right!

292. Look what the boys and I picked for you, Miss Clark.

293. Oh, that's so sweet.

294. Oh, thank you. Thank you, everybody.

295. A little mustard plant.

296. Oh, it's lovely.

297. Oh, everybody, thank you so much.

298. Thank you, Miss Clark.

299. - That's very nice. - That's really sweet.

300. Well, have a wonderful day.

301. We're going to try to make it to the top

302. - of the mountain tonight. - Good!

303. Something we've never done before.

304. Oh, that's exciting. Okay, have a nice time.

305. - Thank you, Miss Clark. - Goodbye.

306. Goodbye, Miss Clark.

307. - Goodbye, Miss Clark. - Bye!

308. All right, men, that's enough of Miss Clark.

309. At the sound of the bell, I want you to charge.

310. Bong! Charge!

311. Charge!

312. Keep going! Do not give up!

313. Get up, man! Don't fall down, be a scout!

314. Be prepared! Be prepared!

315. Onward! Onward!

316. Mariane? Chester?

317. Chester?

318. Mariane?

319. Hey.

320. Chester, baby.

321. Mariane... ow!

322. Mariane?

323. Oh, wow!

324. On the garbage. Mariane, that's really terrific, super.

325. Chester?

326. Chester, would you tell Mariane, please, that...

327. Chester?

328. Chester, what's wrong?

329. Chester?

330. Hey! Hey!

331. Ah!

332. Hey!

333. Well, thank you both very much for the use of the tissue.

334. That's all right.

335. We buy it by the gross.

336. No, but Preston and the boys do need this.

337. We all need it. Thank you.

338. Just bring back what you don't use.

339. Of course. Preston, say thank you

340. to the, uh, cowboy.

341. Preston, take this and let's go back to the boys.

342. Thank you again very much.

343. Watch out for the wolverines.

344. Thanks again!

345. Bobby!

346. Bobby!

347. Don't turn on the light!

348. Oh, Bobby, it's terrible!

349. It's terrible!

350. - He's dead! He's dead! - Slow down.

351. No, we have to hurry, we have to hurry, please!

352. Bobby, hurry!

353. Whoa! Oh!

354. All right, pick that up.

355. One, two, three, build your tent.

356. One, two, three, build your tent.

357. Will you stop that infernal noise now

358. and go build a tent!

359. And you didn't get the license?

360. The license number was on the car which drove away.

361. Now, look, she just ran me into the side of the road.

362. I mean, that's a crime, you can't do a thing

363. - like that, can you? - Yes, leaving the scene

364. of an accident is a crime, Mr. Fazio,

365. but it's your word against hers.

366. Yes, well, she's not here, so...

367. The point is, she did pull me off the road.

368. I mean, I'm... I'm a man

369. with certain influence in this town.

370. This is my home right here, I have a business...

371. - You have to prove it. - Why don't you get in the car...

372. How can I prove it if you...

373. Here, here, that's her.

374. Hey, hey! That's them!

375. Hey, hey! Hey, you!

376. You! You, you! Hey, hey, hey!

377. All right, all right, take it easy.

378. Just calm down, Mr. Fazio.

379. Hold it! Hold it!

380. Chester?

381. Uh, no.

382. You shouldn't go in. No, don't go in.

383. Don't go in there? What did you bring me here for then?

384. I... I don't know, I'm just...

385. I'm so afraid.

386. Aw.

387. You better wait over by the car, okay?

388. Chester?

389. Hey, Chester!

390. Chester?

391. - Hey, old buddy. - Bobby.

392. No, please, that's where it happened.

393. He was... he was sitting in the chair,

394. and the thing came over him, and he was screaming,

395. and he dissolved right there.

396. It looks all right.

397. And they lose their charm and everything and their courage.

398. And, again, you've lost your youthful appearance.

399. In the thighs, now if they get too big on the outside

400. and you can't seem to fit in your day clothes

401. or your evening clothes or whatever.

402. All right, let's go.

403. Jack LaLanne? At this hour?

404. Whoops.

405. Look at that. I've never known Chester

406. to leave a full can of beer for anything.

407. We didn't check the back room.

408. Back, one and two and three and four...

409. Ahh! Don't do that!

410. - Oh. - Oh.

411. Don't do that, please.

412. Let's go sit in the car.

413. They'll be home in a minute.

414. All right, stand still.

415. This is the sheriff.

416. Sheriff. Sheriff!

417. Chester has been killed.

418. Hold it.

419. Who are you?

420. I'm Lisa Clark.

421. Lisa Cl... he was screaming.

422. Hold it, hold it. Who are you?

423. - Bobby Hartford. - Is this your car?

424. It's mine, it's mine.

425. All right, now who was killed?

426. Chester Hargis and he lives right here.

427. - Where's the body? - I don't know! It's gone!

428. All right, come over here to my car.

429. Control, officer needs assistance.

430. Send some men over to 721 Hastings Street right away.

431. That's right. Sheriff Jones.

432. Code seven.

433. All right, you two get in the back.

434. Here's what to do to know it's feeling all right.

435. In the morning, waking up in the bathtub, oh.

436. And the cocaine is bringing me, bringing me down.

437. Oh, tell me where (indistinct singing).

438. I know I've been here, been here before.

439. Tell me where to start, yeah.

440. Yeah.

441. God, I've been here before.

442. Yes, I have.

443. Oh, Randy, that was out of sight.

444. This is out of sight.

445. Oh.

446. - This is a far out idea. - I know.

447. Goodnight, sweet princess.

448. Parting is such sweet sorrow.

449. Hey, listen, uh...

450. Uh...

451. Uh...

452. Um, so, um...

453. Um, I dig the way my voice sounds in here.

454. Well, I dig the way your voice...

455. Really, man, I think Bobby ought to tape it.

456. It sounds like rivers, rivers.

457. Oh, baby.

458. Ow, ow, ow-ow.

459. Woo!

460. Weird, Randolph, weird.

461. Weird, weird.

462. Weird, weird, weird, weird!

463. Okay, so tell me your idea about the party.

464. Okay, well, we get this band of Armenian midgets

465. to abduct Bobby, you see?

466. Yeah, it's good. They stick him in a gunny sack,

467. drag him into the car, and...

468. We...

469. We get to the Tasmanian gondolier

470. to dress up in a chartreuse Zambezi uniform

471. and then fly!

472. Freeze!

473. Shoot.

474. What's the matter, officer?

475. We're just on our way to a party.

476. Hold it right there.

477. What... what's the idea?

478. What's going on?

479. Why don't you put your hands where I can see them?

480. Uh, on your head.

481. It's only me.

482. Hey, Sims, there's a call for assistance on the radio.

483. We better drop this.

484. Drop this? No.

485. I'm not dropping anything.

486. Ah, they're just kids.

487. Just kids, huh?

488. Well, when you get a call and an officer is in trouble,

489. it's more important. Let's go.

490. Can we go? We'll go right home.

491. - Yeah. - No.

492. Okay, you do what you want, Ted.

493. I'm going on that call.

494. Um, listen...

495. Officer, we weren't hurting anyone.

496. I mean, if you let us go, we'll go straight home.

497. Please, sir, we weren't doing anything.

498. Really. Really, can we go?

499. All right, now you two keep your hands on your heads

500. and come out real slow.

501. What's that behind you?

502. Don't get cute. Just come out.

503. No, man, he's not kidding.

504. There's something behind you.

505. Now are you gonna come out,

506. or do I have to come in and get you?

507. Look out!

508. Special unit, central control.

509. Williams and Davis, sir.

510. I need someone to go inside with me

511. and someone to keep an eye on these two.

512. But I just left Sims on an arrest.

513. Okay, Kelly, you go on back to Sims.

514. - Jim, you cover the front door. - Right.

515. Ow!

516. Oh my God.

517. Hi.

518. Obviously.

519. Are you a barber?

520. Do I look like a barber?

521. A hair stylist?

522. Don't you get snotty with me again, young fella.

523. I'm sorry, I didn't mean anything.

524. I'm a stylist.

525. No, no, I'm...

526. I'm more than that.

527. I'm an artist.

528. What are you doing here?

529. I'd like a haircut.

530. You would like a haircut?

531. Yeah.

532. I don't cut hair, I...

533. I sculpt it.

534. Do you want a hair sculpt?

535. Yeah.

536. Then I think I can help you.

537. Wow.

538. - Turn around. - Sure.

539. All the way, all the way.

540. All the way back. Don't be timid.

541. All the way back.

542. It'll be $400.

543. Okay.

544. - Okay? - Sure.

545. Let me see it.

546. Well, I...

547. I got some in this pocket and...

548. Here, I got some more in that pocket.

549. We can go through the rest of the pockets later on.

550. Okay.

551. - I'll hold it. - Yeah, you hold it.

552. Wouldn't want to get it wet during the shampoo.

553. It's going to be $200, you know, for the shampoo alone.

554. Now, generally, I sculpt the hair

555. before the shampoo, but in your case,

556. it simply cries out for washing.

557. Yeah.

558. Take those off.

559. Sit.

560. I get the feeling that I am the first human being

561. to ever touch your hair.

562. Is that correct?

563. Uh, my mother did once.

564. Michelangelo's medium was white Carrara marble.

565. Mine...

566. is hair.

567. Oh.

568. We'll have to moisten you a little bit.

569. You're not afraid of water, are you?

570. No, nuh-uh.

571. There's a good amount of debris coming out of there.

572. Oh.

573. There you go.

574. You know, you smell of incense.

575. I'll have to remember that.

576. There we go.

577. Now sit up and we'll foam you.

578. Oh.

579. Ah.

580. Ah, hey, that feels good.

581. - Yes. - You are good.

582. Yes, and you are dirty.

583. Oh, my goodness.

584. Gentle.

585. Oh, yes, we can do a good job.

586. Oh.

587. Yeah, far out.

588. You do groan a great deal, don't you?

589. I think you're purring.

590. All right.

591. Now, we'll get all of this awful foamy stuff

592. off your head, and then I'll go to work

593. with my mallet and chisel.

594. Yeah, that's them.

595. That's them. Yes, sir. Good work.

596. I'm not familiar with this case,

597. but the sheriff is, he'll be right out.

598. Hey, don't be modest.

599. This is a salute to law and order.

600. I mean it, it's amazing.

601. That's really fast service, you know?

602. Well, we try to maintain a level of efficiency.

603. You do, you do.

604. What is this? You're all computerized now, right?

605. Hey, I mean, that's speed.

606. These kids, I tell ya, they ran into my car

607. off the road today.

608. The sheriff was there like that.

609. And, I mean, this is really amazing.

610. I really want to congratulate you.

611. - Thank you, sir. - Not at all.

612. - Here comes the sheriff now. - Hey, you're far too modest.

613. Oh, good work, Sheriff.

614. Good work.

615. Hey, double thanks, huh?

616. - You bet. - That's the spirit, good work.

617. I mean, that was really fast.

618. Hello, Sheriff! Good work.

619. Yes, sir, these are the kids.

620. Okay, you two can go home.

621. Here, listen, I want these two arrested.

622. Look, there's nothing in there.

623. If they don't turn up before morning,

624. you two stop by the station and file a report.

625. No, Chester is dead,

626. and I don't even know what happened to Mariane,

627. and there's this thing and it eats people!

628. Maybe you two kids are on a trip or something.

629. I don't know and I don't care.

630. Now my deputies and I made a thorough search of the house

631. and there is nothing in there.

632. Now let's just clear out.

633. I'm not tripping out!

634. I know exactly what I saw!

635. You've caused enough trouble for one night, young lady.

636. I think we ought to take 'em down to the station.

637. What do you say, Sheriff?

638. If they don't turn up by morning,

639. you stop in and make a report.

640. - He's dead! - Sheriff, just a minute,

641. I want to place a citizen's arrest.

642. These kids ran me off the road.

643. You saw it.

644. Oi.

645. Here, just a minute, uh...

646. Here, uh...

647. Sheriff?

648. Sheriff, these... that is the Blazer that I was...

649. Uh...

650. Do you believe me?

651. Hey, let's go to your place and have

652. an avocado sandwich, huh?

653. On whole wheat bread with alfalfa sprouts

654. and Monterey Jack cheese.

655. - Bobby. - And no bacon.

656. Please.

657. Please believe me.

658. - Oh, darling. - Bobby, please.

659. I love you.

660. You're just the man I want to see.

661. And you're just the man I want to see.

662. You'll never believe what I've seen.

663. I don't believe what I'm seeing.

664. I don't suppose you've got any identification.

665. Get in the car, nature boy.

666. What do you want to do?

667. No, I mean we have to do something

668. about what happened today.

669. Oh, darling, let's not talk about it anymore, okay?

670. We'll talk about it tomorrow.

671. You don't believe me, do you?

672. I believe you, but we went over there

673. and there was nothing there, right? Huh?

674. - Hey, let's get wrecked. - No.

675. - Want to get wrecked with me? - No, I don't want to.

676. Want to go beddy-bye?

677. Go beddy-bye with Bobby? Come on.

678. Bobby!

679. No!

680. Bobby?

681. One, two, three!

682. - Believe me. - Babe.

683. - I believe you. - Believe me,

684. I didn't make it up.

685. Were Chester and Mariane in on this?

686. No, no! I didn't...

687. Everybody, you've got to listen to me!

688. This terrible thing happened tonight!

689. Well, Lisa, I warned you about Bobby.

690. No, no! It was... it was...

691. I... this thing, it's loose!

692. Say, that's funny.

693. I noticed my watch is magnetized,

694. and the moon, it's a full moon,

695. and when I saw it, suddenly, I turned into a werewolf.

696. Ah-woo!

697. No!

698. You got to stop it!

699. No!

700. Get wrecked with me!

701. Get wrecked with me!

702. How about you and me, honey?

703. Happy Birthday!

704. Happy Birthday!

705. I don't know how she got you here,

706. but I'm sure glad she did.

707. Happy Birthday.

708. How many candles is that?

709. You've got to make a wish.

710. I've got everything I want.

711. - Where's Lisa? - Oh, come on, man,

712. blow 'em out, blow 'em out.

713. I can't handle all those candles.

714. We'll give you some help.

715. Come on, everybody, one big breath.

716. One, two, three!

717. Where's Lisa?

718. I think she's upstairs.

719. She said she wasn't feeling well.

720. Have you seen Lisa?

721. Where's my baby?

722. Where are you going?

723. Hey, have you seen Lisa?

724. Seen my baby?

725. Hey, what's the matter?

726. Can't take any more of this, I can't take it.

727. Oh, come on, let's go home.

728. Okay.

729. Hey, where are you going, man?

730. She doesn't feel well, man, I'm taking her to my place.

731. - She doesn't feel well? - Maybe I'll come back later.

732. Oh, yeah, yeah, right.

733. - Thank you! - Bye-bye!

734. She doesn't feel well?

735. What is that, "She doesn't feel well"?

736. "She doesn't feel well, we're going to my place.

737. She doesn't feel... she doesn't feel well."

738. Hey, relax a little, will ya?

739. It'll be a little quieter at my place.

740. I'll fix you an avocado sandwich, okay?

741. - Okay. - With bacon.

742. Okay, I like bacon.

743. I want it with bacon.

744. Hey, buddy, cool it.

745. You're gonna get us all in trouble around here.

746. Gah!

747. No, I told you, this is an emergency!

748. You just find him and put him through to me.

749. I don't care!

750. Of course I'll wait!

751. What do you think?

752. - What's that? - Indecent exposure.

753. - What did he do? - Trotting down the street

754. in his birthday suit.

755. Say, I haven't had a chance to get back to Sims,

756. and he hasn't shown up yet.

757. What was it?

758. Just a couple of kids turning out in a drain pipe.

759. I sent Eddie over to check it out.

760. Anything else?

761. We're having a really weird night here.

762. Nobody's where they're supposed to be.

763. Mrs. Caramel just called.

764. Her husband's a barber, very steady type,

765. always comes home, only he didn't.

766. He's not in his shop.

767. Her oldest son went to look for him

768. and the shop was wide open and nobody there.

769. Mrs. Barker, who's always home, ain't.

770. And Mr. Zeigler,

771. who had a very important meeting to make,

772. he didn't make it there or anyplace else.

773. No way to check that out yet.

774. And I've got a half-dozen more missing person calls.

775. Here, try this on for size.

776. I don't want to try anything.

777. Get away from me.

778. What's going on?

779. What about the big annual tournament

780. down at the bowling alley?

781. I didn't think of that.

782. That's why I is the sheriff and you is the deputy.

783. Will you excuse me?

784. My girl's not feeling good

785. and I want to take her home.

786. I'm sorry, sir, uh...

787. You two.

788. What are you doing here?

789. Haven't you caused enough damage for one day?

790. Get out and look at my car, what you've done.

791. I'm really sorry about that, but I...

792. "Sorry" doesn't pay the bills, sonny boy.

793. - I didn't mean to do... - I don't care

794. what you meant, cutie, I just want you to see

795. what you've done to my car.

796. - I'll back up. - Oh, no, you don't!

797. No, you don't, not over my dead body, you don't!

798. - Just... just... - Okay, have it your own way.

799. Hey! Hey!

800. Hey, hey, hey, all right!

801. Hey!

802. All right, sonny boy,

803. that's the way you wanna play it.

804. No more Mr. Nice Guy.

805. Ow!

806. Ow.

807. Do you know who he is?

808. No, and I'd really rather not.

809. But I'll take care of it in the morning.

810. I remember where that alley was.

811. I'll... I'll go see him about it.

812. - Okay. - Okay.

813. Okay, I'm glad.

814. I hate hippies.

815. I hate hippies!

816. They ruin all of us.

817. The trouble with you is you're hostile.

818. - I'm hostile? - You're basically hostile.

819. Kiss me.

820. That was a hostile gesture disguised in language.

821. You want hostile, you've been attacking me

822. ever since we opened the bottle.

823. You're half-tailed philosopher.

824. I'm beginning to dislike you, you one-eyed platypus.

825. A one-eyed platypus, a duck-billed platypus,

826. and don't push my friend.

827. Will you stop looking?

828. Will ya?

829. - See... - Don't push him.

830. He's looking for my bottle.

831. What is that, man?

832. I feel...

833. something a little more drinkable,

834. like (indistinct) or sherry.

835. - Get away from my leg. - Don't hit my friend!

836. If you hit him again, you're gonna take a quick trip

837. to an orthodontist.

838. Look, he can't help but look over here.

839. You gotta take your beard off, man.

840. You know, I think you look like a hippie.

841. You're wearing one of those serapes, right?

842. I stole it.

843. - I stole it. - From a hippie?

844. I stole it from Bullock.

845. Get out of here.

846. You're like the hippies, you know,

847. as long as we give you something...

848. - Shut up. - ... you're happy!

849. - Don't give you nothing... - Wait, wait, wait,

850. stop talking a minute.

851. What the... what is that?

852. Want to go look?

853. No, you go look.

854. - You go look. - Go on and look.

855. All right, let's compromise.

856. You go look.

857. You don't believe in the hereafter,

858. anything like that?

859. - You're a big hippie! - Yay!

860. Hippie-shmippie!

861. My partner here will go look, right?

862. Come on, come on.

863. One look, man.

864. - I'll tell you a thing about brain surgery. - All right, tell me.

865. The thing is, I knew of a hippie.

866. He was doing his income taxes.

867. And he had a sharpened pencil.

868. A hippie doing an income tax!

869. And he leans on his sharpened pencil,

870. went right up his nose,

871. and he gave himself a transorbital leucotomy

872. right in the brain.

873. - Why'd he give himself... - It was an accident!

874. Hippies pay income tax, that's the point of the story,

875. just like you and me.

876. You got it, you go.

877. - Murder! - Why do you drag me?

878. Why don't you go?

879. - Get out of here, you loafer! - Get away from me.

880. I swear, I'll give it to you!

881. - Get out there! - He looks in trouble!

882. - Go on. - He looks in trouble, don't he?

883. He looks like he's in trouble to me, too.

884. - What's he got all over him? - You'll be in trouble

885. if you don't give him a hand, come on!

886. He's eating him up!

887. Hey!

888. - Hey! - Ah!

889. I'd like some pistachio almond ice cream

890. with hot chocolate sauce

891. and... oh, I know what,

892. I'd like a raspberry sherbet in it, too,

893. - with sliced bananas... - Are we gonna go

894. - to the coffee shop? - Huh?

895. Are we going to the coffee shop?

896. Uh, yeah, go find Bobby and Lisa and we'll meet you there.

897. - Come on. - Yeah, and, uh...

898. Are you coming?

899. - Vanilla, vanilla, vanilla! - Are you coming?

900. Yeah, I'm coming.

901. - Good! - Yeah.

902. Good!

903. Bobby?

904. Hey, hey!

905. To heck with that avocado sandwich.

906. Look at the campfire.

907. Yeah, Mr. Adleman brings his scout troop up here

908. twice a year.

909. I'm sorry, Bobby.

910. What do you mean?

911. I wanted your birthday to be special.

912. It was!

913. It was a super birthday.

914. I just don't know what happened.

915. I don't know what's real anymore.

916. Darling, nothing is real.

917. Hey.

918. It's your birthday present.

919. Oh, no.

920. It's your birthday, it's your birthday present.

921. Oh, my gosh.

922. Oh, Lord.

923. Look at that.

924. - Did you do that? - Mhm, Mariane and I did.

925. Bobby.

926. Oh, Bobby.

927. Oh.

928. - Bobby? - Mm?

929. - Don't move. - What's the matter?

930. - Don't... don't move. - What?

931. What do you mean?

932. That... that thing.

933. That's it!

934. That's it!

935. That's what got Chester!

936. It's all over!

937. Ah!

938. - Oh! - Come over here.

939. I'll open the door and plow through it.

940. Don't let it touch you!

941. Don't let it get on you!

942. - Oh! - Lord. Let's get out of here.

943. Come on, take hold, take hold!

944. It won't... come on, let's go.

945. Oh, it's coming through!

946. Bobby!

947. - It's so cold. - Bobby!

948. It's leaving!

949. Bobby, it's going after the horses!

950. Service!

951. Service, you clowns!

952. Hello? Is anybody here?

953. Hey, you can't do that.

954. You're supposed to wait for the man to show up.

955. Come on, who are you kidding?

956. Joe? This time you're gonna go too far.

957. It's one thing to rip off gasoline,

958. but it's another if you're gonna start stealing stuff!

959. I won't put up with it!

960. Well, if you don't like it, don't put up with it.

961. Les, it came after us!

962. It got in the car and it came after us!

963. It's just... it's unbelievable!

964. He's gonna call the sheriff 'cause we've gotta do something!

965. Hey, Bobby! Where have you been, man?

966. We've been looking all over town for you!

967. - Hey, Bobby? - Hello, operator?

968. Get me the sheriff.

969. Operator? Get me the sheriff!

970. Yeah, yeah, I know that you're tied up!

971. This is an emergency, please!

972. - It came in... - Hello, I've gotta talk

973. to the sheriff right away.

974. - Oh, not that monster... - Can you try to find him?

975. Yeah, it's very urgent!

976. Yeah, I'll hold on.

977. I'll stay here, you go down there,

978. and you meet us here in half an hour, all right?

979. Don't!

980. All right, I'm gonna stay here with Lisa.

981. All right, all right, get out!

982. All right, all right, I will!

983. Creep.

984. Hello?

985. I can't find him.

986. What?

987. Does he know where to find him?

988. Will you try, please?

989. Yeah, okay.

990. - I can't reach the sheriff. - Can't you tell somebody else?

991. Over the phone, are you kidding?

992. Oh, my God, what is that?

993. What? Yeah, go ahead!

994. The bowling alley?

995. Then we'll go over there!

996. Hey, what's going on up there?

997. Bobby, that's it.

998. That's that thing!

999. Stop the car, we've gotta get out and help him!

1000. Oh, no, no, Leslie, it won't do any good!

1001. No, Leslie, it won't do any good,

1002. you can't help him!

1003. No!

1004. No, Bobby!

1005. It'll kill you!

1006. Hey, no!

1007. Bobby, please!

1008. Bowl Down Cancer Week:

1009. Win a free, all-expense paid trip

1010. to Mexico City.

1011. We're sorry to inform you the ice rink is closed,

1012. but in three weeks, our all-new ice rink

1013. will be opening for your ice skating pleasure.

1014. The 10th annual Bowl Down Cancer Week

1015. is sponsored by the American Cancer Society

1016. - and AFM Incorporated. - Eight and a half ladies shoes.

1017. Don't have any eight and a half.

1018. - I need an eight and a half... - Seven, seven and a half,

1019. - eight, nine, 10. - Eight's too small

1020. - and nine's too big. - They keep walking out

1021. with the eight and a half.

1022. - Stay in the car! - No!

1023. Please stay in the car!

1024. Have you guys seen the sheriff?

1025. - What? - Sheriff!

1026. Joe get busted in his gorilla suit?

1027. - Have you seen the sheriff? - What?

1028. The sheriff!

1029. Hey, is the sheriff here?

1030. Have you seen the sheriff?

1031. Keep walking out with the eight...

1032. I've gotta make an important announcement.

1033. Just a second, just a second.

1034. But listen, this is important, man!

1035. - Have you seen Sheriff Jones? - There may be an old pair.

1036. I've gotta make an announcement!

1037. Hello? Hello?

1038. Your attention, everybody, please.

1039. If Sheriff Jones is in the building,

1040. would he come to the main desk?

1041. Listen to me, everybody.

1042. It's very important that you all leave this area right away.

1043. Would Sheriff Jones come to the main desk, please?

1044. Your attention, everybody.

1045. It's very important that you all

1046. leave this area immediately.

1047. Please listen to me!

1048. You are all in great danger here!

1049. There is something that has been killing people tonight.

1050. Some form of life, it'll be here any minute!

1051. You must leave the building now.

1052. That's Bobby!

1053. There's a lot of time to get out,

1054. but you've gotta start now.

1055. I repeat: There is great danger

1056. to anyone remaining in this building.

1057. Some friends of ours have been killed already.

1058. - Please hurry! - What's that?

1059. Oh, my God, Henry!

1060. Henry, there's somebody out there...

1061. go out and get him off the P.A.!

1062. What the hell's he doing on the P.A. system?

1063. What the heck is that guy doing over there?

1064. If Sheriff Jones is here, would he please report

1065. - to the main desk? - What's going on here?

1066. Sheriff Jones...

1067. No!

1068. Come on, get out of here!

1069. Out, out, out, out!

1070. - Get the sheriff, man! - What?

1071. Get the sheriff!

1072. These crazy kids are causing trouble

1073. in the bowling alley.

1074. Ladies and gentlemen, I have to apologize

1075. for the jokester, a nut or something.

1076. Don't be alarmed.

1077. Go back to the tournament.

1078. The clown has been taken care of.

1079. There's no danger to anyone.

1080. Now, when our ice rink is open,

1081. we'll have free ice skating for two days.

1082. - Thank you. - Boy, I tell you,

1083. this dumb thing is just falling apart!

1084. I've been fixing the joint and it's falling apart.

1085. The pipes are up.

1086. Yeah, the whole thing, look at it!

1087. What are you gonna do, what do you need?

1088. I don't know, I don't know!

1089. I just fixed it yesterday and the thing...

1090. Where's that Fazio?

1091. I'd like to sit him up right in the pins

1092. - and throw balls... - Look, I can fix it...

1093. No, watch your hands, watch your hands!

1094. You play a beautiful piano,

1095. I don't want you to get them messed up.

1096. All right, now, I'll tell you what,

1097. hand me the (slurred words).

1098. I've gotta tighten the thing up.

1099. There's some dummies standing out there

1100. waiting to throw the dumb ball all the way down here.

1101. We could be playing some beautiful Toccata and Fugues.

1102. All right, now, give me the roses.

1103. I want a roses right now, pal.

1104. Come on with the roses!

1105. I'll tighten this thing up, we'll be back...

1106. - Getting it? - Wait a minute, wait a minute.

1107. All right, I want the clawses.

1108. One clawses, come on, pal!

1109. Clawses in front!

1110. - Come on! - All right, all right!

1111. And tighten it up.

1112. How about another one? Want another one?

1113. Come on, come on, quit fooling around down there!

1114. Quit fooling around, give me a (slurring)!

1115. Down here, (indistinct)!

1116. That's a dumb (slurred) book!

1117. I want the (slurring), come on!

1118. Mike? What's the problem with the machines back there?

1119. Come on, will ya quit fooling around?

1120. Will you give me the stuff?

1121. Come on, man, just hand it to me.

1122. Give me those... hey.

1123. Hey, what is this?

1124. Hey, what is...

1125. Hey!

1126. Oh, no!

1127. One set of false dentures and bridge.

1128. Okay, your bond's posted.

1129. - Here you go. - What's this?

1130. Just sign it, it says you didn't leave

1131. any valuables here.

1132. Joseph Marussich.

1133. Okay, you can go home now.

1134. Your appearance date is on this card.

1135. Don't lose it.

1136. And bring those clothes back by Monday.

1137. I'm not going alone.

1138. There is something in my house!

1139. For the last time, I'm not going home with you!

1140. Hey, just wait, I'll get right with it.

1141. Mike!

1142. All right, anybody'll get a refund that wants it,

1143. it's all right.

1144. Where's the sheriff?

1145. Look, there's this weirdness going on at the bowling alley.

1146. You guys had better get down there, man!

1147. Mike? Al!

1148. Hey, anybody there?

1149. What's going on?

1150. Everything okay?

1151. What's going on?

1152. Two of our friends were killed tonight

1153. - by this creature. - Oh, a creature!

1154. It's gonna be here any minute.

1155. Oh, something from the moon!

1156. What do you want with my life?

1157. Please listen to me, there's no time

1158. for any explanation.

1159. We've gotta get everybody out of here

1160. - before it's too late! - You're all in danger!

1161. Yeah, I believe you, and the danger is you two!

1162. This is real!

1163. It's important!

1164. I'll tell you what's real and important, young lady!

1165. What's real and important is that you two

1166. are gonna pay for my car and my property

1167. and for interrupting this business, is that clear?

1168. Now what?

1169. Hold it! Hold it! What's happened?

1170. Is this more of your work, sonny boy?

1171. What's going on here?

1172. they have long hair, so they wouldn't, uh...

1173. What seems to be the matter?

1174. You first.

1175. Well, sir, essentially, there's an emergency,

1176. and we've been trying to get these guys

1177. - to come down to... - Wait a minute.

1178. to come down because people are freaking out.

1179. Now you.

1180. Sheriff, the two kids come in here,

1181. they come barging in like we're supposed to do

1182. exactly what they say.

1183. I told them they had to wait for you.

1184. If they don't, you know, there's no law and order.

1185. What is he doing still here?

1186. Well, Sheriff, he says there's something at his house

1187. trying to eat him up.

1188. Eat him up?

1189. Back, come back with me.

1190. Out here, through the ice rink!

1191. Hold it!

1192. Hold it, take it easy, take it easy!

1193. Hold it, somebody...

1194. What's going on? This is private property!

1195. What is going on with those phones?

1196. Those kids were right, there's something going on

1197. over at that bowling alley.

1198. Just calm down!

1199. Everything's all right, just take it...

1200. This is private property!

1201. Take it easy, everything is under...

1202. God!

1203. Move, be quick!

1204. Through here!

1205. Get the door!

1206. Hit the lights.

1207. Oh, my God!

1208. Deputy Williams, get some players out here.

1209. - Plan B, sir? - No, Williams, not plan B.

1210. You just do what I tell you to do, all right?

1211. Get some players over on the far side there.

1212. Is there anyone here who can give me some information

1213. about what's going on in there?

1214. Will this thing work as a P.A.?

1215. It should, the whole place has been renovated...

1216. Hello? Hello?

1217. We're in the rec room above the ice rink.

1218. Can you hear me?

1219. Wait a minute, wait a minute.

1220. Please be careful breaking in.

1221. If this thing gets loose, there's no stopping it.

1222. It's all over the rink, it's blocking all the exits.

1223. - That sounds like Bobby! - Some strange life form.

1224. We're safe for the moment.

1225. Please be very careful,

1226. many people have been killed already.

1227. There's only three of us left here.

1228. Everyone else escaped or was killed.

1229. I don't think it can get to us, but we can't get out.

1230. Come on, man, you've gotta let us get in there.

1231. He's our best friend.

1232. Look, you two, go on over with the prior unit

1233. and get some helmets or jackets

1234. and look official and try to help out.

1235. Williams, will you go with them?

1236. Right, Sheriff.

1237. Can you tell us the nature...

1238. - I'm sorry. - Bobby?

1239. Tell 'em what the thing is!

1240. It's like a giant one-celled animal.

1241. It can move real fast and squeeze through tiny cracks.

1242. It eats living things, it's really big.

1243. A couple hours ago, it was like a man

1244. and now it's covering the whole rink.

1245. Please hurry.

1246. It's starting to cover the booth.

1247. Oh.

1248. Hurry, please!

1249. - Do something! - Give me your coat!

1250. Quick.

1251. Our first responsibility

1252. is to get those people out of there.

1253. We kill it here, it'll be no problem.

1254. What if we can't kill it?

1255. If that thing gets those people,

1256. it'll be through with that place!

1257. There's a hospital three blocks down on Senora.

1258. A block that way there's a rest home.

1259. If that thing, whatever it is,

1260. decides to leave the ice rink,

1261. we are in a world of trouble!

1262. Hurry!

1263. Go get your riot gear.

1264. What's going on out there?

1265. Is anybody doing anything?

1266. We're trapped in here.

1267. Is anybody doing anything out there?

1268. Oh, no.

1269. - No! - What's going on out there?

1270. - Look! - We're gonna get killed!

1271. We've gotta get out of here!

1272. - Calm down, will ya? - We've gotta get out of here!

1273. Take it easy!

1274. What are you gonna do?

1275. This just might work.

1276. Get back.

1277. - It's not working. - (moaning)

1278. Williams, will you please wait in the coffee shop?

1279. I stuck an electrical wire into it.

1280. It didn't have any effect at all.

1281. I don't know what we'll do now.

1282. What's that thing?

1283. That's the weirdest thing I've ever seen.

1284. - Go away! - Don't!

1285. Kelly! Kelly! My God!

1286. The thing got Kelly.

1287. B... bullets have no effect on it!

1288. I don't know how we're gonna stop it.

1289. You've gotta think of something, Sheriff.

1290. Plan B, Sheriff?

1291. Look, it's getting bigger.

1292. We've gotta get off the floor, quick!

1293. Get up on the counter.

1294. Look!

1295. Lookit!

1296. It's going away!

1297. - That's it. - What?

1298. It can't take the cold.

1299. - Remember your car? - What?

1300. The air conditioning in your car,

1301. we turned it on accidentally, it made it go away!

1302. Right!

1303. I've got it.

1304. Hello? Please help!

1305. The exits are all blocked!

1306. Those people are gone inside.

1307. Hello?

1308. - It's broken. - Cheap!

1309. I want you to get all the gasoline you can.

1310. Put out all the flares.

1311. Absolutely no smoking.

1312. We're going to burn the place down,

1313. I can't take any chances.

1314. Yes, sir.

1315. How fast can we freeze it?

1316. - What? - The rink!

1317. Uh, oh, uh, instantaneously, it's very, very fast.

1318. - It's... - Where do I turn it on?

1319. Oh, there's a switch in a metal box

1320. over there under the windows.

1321. Can't get out that door.

1322. Oh, there's a trap door here.

1323. Be careful, be careful.

1324. Good luck, good luck.

1325. Bobby!

1326. Get those cars back.

1327. I want everybody to clear the area immediately.

1328. You people, move back out of this area quickly!

1329. Do what you're told!

1330. Bobby, it's coming up the rope!

1331. The rope!

1332. Bobby!

1333. Leave them alone!

1334. Firemen, get those crowds back!

1335. You people over there, move back!

1336. Throw a can up on top of the building!

1337. Get that ladder away from the building!

1338. Everybody clear this area quickly.

1339. What are they doing?

1340. - Bobby! - We can't take any chances.

1341. I wanna coordinate this.

1342. Will you please listen to the deputy?

1343. You must do as you're told now.

1344. It's really dangerous.

1345. We have to put this thing to death.

1346. We're going to burn the building now.

1347. No, there's people in here!

1348. Will you people get back

1349. from the other side there, please?

1350. Firemen are putting the ladders up now.

1351. Move back, you people!

1352. We're going to burn this building!

1353. Somebody get me a newspaper, an old rag, or something.

1354. Let's start this.

1355. Get that ladder away from there!

1356. Good. Give me a match.

1357. Got a match, something to light this thing with?

1358. All right, you people, I told you to get back!

1359. All right, get those things up on top of the building,

1360. get that ladder away from there.

1361. Move back!

1362. Give me a match!

1363. Move back!

1364. Get me a light, somebody!

1365. Get me a light!

1366. Thanks.

1367. Boy, you should've seen what happened to Mr. Adleman!

1368. It's gonna be all right, son.

1369. Look, you boys get on back.

1370. Williams, get those boys back.

1371. All right, you people, move out!

1372. The lighter don't work.

1373. There you go.

1374. All right!

1375. You people get back, get those cars out of the way!

1376. We're going to burn this building!

1377. - Hey, hold it! - Now, you people,

1378. - get over there! - Hold it!

1379. What are you doing?

1380. It's over, man, we stopped it.

1381. What do you mean it's over?

1382. We froze that damn thing.

1383. Come on, I'll show ya.

1384. Williams, come on!

1385. Fire, take both directions.

1386. You okay?

1387. It's gonna be a better world without this thing.

1388. Bobby! Oh!

1389. All right, hold it right there, kids.

1390. Now, listen, Sheriff,

1391. I don't want anybody to leave this place

1392. until I know who's gonna pay for this mess.

1393. Look at that frozen stinking thing out here.

1394. Now, as a citizen and owner of this place,

1395. I want to make sure that I...

1396. - Plan B, Sheriff? - Plan B, Williams.

1397. last three weeks has been spent here.

1398. I'm terribly sorry, sir, but you're gonna have

1399. - to vacate the premises. - I happen to be the owner

1400. - of this place. - Yes, sir, I understand.

1401. Look, my name is Edward Fazio.

1402. I happen to own the place, you understand?

1403. - Watch your step. - Don't... you can't...

1404. - Restricted area, sir. - We're for the local television.

1405. The public has a right to see this.

1406. I'm terribly sorry, sir, it doesn't matter

1407. that you are from the local television...

1408. It's all right, Williams, let 'em in.

1409. Thank you, Sheriff Jones.

1410. Marvin, throw some light on the sheriff.

1411. Sheriff, would you be good enough

1412. to walk out across this stuff, please?

1413. - Marvin, follow him. - Don't want anybody to get hurt.

1414. Okay, now everybody move back, please.

1415. Everybody move back.

1416. Please, this is a restricted area.

1417. We don't want anybody hurt here.

1418. Please step back, ma'am.

1419. I'd appreciate it very much.

1420. Our city would appreciate it very much.

1421. Put that light over there, please.

1422. Just right here to fill in.

1423. Sheriff Jones, would you step over this way,

1424. please, a moment?

1425. I'm sure our viewers would like a few comments from you

1426. on this unparalleled and tragic disaster.

1427. - Just step right here. - Right here?

1428. Right here would be fine, thank you.

1429. - Is this all right? - Yes.

1430. Any time.

1431. Well, don't you say "action" or something?

1432. - No, I'm already rolling. - Oh.

1433. - You want comments? - Yes, please.

1434. Yes.

1435. This is the most incredible thing

1436. that we have ever seen.

1437. Can I have my lighter back?

1438. It is unbelievable.

1439. Hundreds of people have been killed

1440. by this shapeless monster.

1441. What is it?

1442. Where did it come from?

1443. Outer space?

1444. Who knows?

1445. - Can I have my lighter back? - It was stopped here

1446. by a simple chemical process:

1447. the freezing system in the pipes of an ice skating rink.

1448. And by the cooperation of everyone

1449. pulling together in a moment of common and extreme danger.

1450. If it hadn't been stopped,

1451. this blob might have devoured America

1452. or perhaps even the entire planet.

1453. My deputies and the people did a superb job.

1454. I have been in telephone communication

1455. with the President of the United States,

1456. and he wishes me to thank everyone

1457. for their help in what shall go down in history

1458. as possibly the greatest personal danger

1459. to ever confront mankind.

1460. What?