1. This yacht is bringing...
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2. a revolutionary scientific invention
to Gotham City.
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3. On a peaceful
afternoon motor ride...
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4. millionaire Bruce Wayne
and his youthful ward, Dick Grayson...
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5. have been summoned back
to Wayne Manor...
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6. by an urgent but anonymous
call for help.
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7. The invention and its custodian...
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8. are reported in grave danger
aboard the yacht.
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9. Never ones
to shirk responsibility...
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10. Bruce and Dick-
with characteristic speed and resolve-
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11. descend promptly to the Batcave.
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12. And then, as they have done
many times before...
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13. as Batman and Robin—
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14. courageous warriors
against crime-
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15. they are off, once again,
to the rescue.
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16. Atomic batteries to power.
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17. - Turbines to speed.
- Roger. Ready to move out.
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18. Batmobile to airport.
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19. Red alert. Prepare Batcopter
for immediate takeoff.
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20. Batmobile approaching Batcopter.
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21. Red alert! Red alert!
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22. Gotham Tower to all aircraft
in the Gotham control zone.
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23. Enter your holding pattern.
Repeat: Enter your holding pattern.
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24. Batcopter cleared for takeoff.
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25. Gives a feller a good feelin'
to know they're up there doin' their job.
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26. Bat drift angle: 0-3 to starboard.
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27. Roger. Correcting to port.
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28. Altitude: 3-1-7.
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29. Sink rate:.49.
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30. - Drop bat ladder.
- Bat ladder away.
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31. Lock computer on afterdeck.
Set automatic bat hold.
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32. Watch out, Batman.
This could be tricky.
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33. Have no fear, Robin.
I'll keep all my wits about me.
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34. So long— for a minute.
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35. Batman to Robin.
Ease off on the power.
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36. Increase sink rate.
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37. Roger. Wilco.
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38. Take her up!
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39. Holy sardine!
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40. Hand me down
the shark repellent bat spray!
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41. All right. Enough pictures.
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42. This press conference
must be brief, ladies and gentlemen.
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43. You're lucky
the Dynamic Duo will talk to you at all.
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44. You there, Mr. Merrick,
of the Gotham City Times.
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45. According to rumor, Batman...
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46. a transatlantic yacht
approaching this city simply disappeared.
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47. Nonsense. How can a yacht
"simply" disappear?
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48. - You mean it isn't true?
- I stand on my answer, Mr. Merrick.
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49. Mr. Stanley of the Globe.
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50. This yacht, I believe, belonged to
the famous Big Ben Distilleries.
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51. That's right.
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52. Isn't the firm's proprietor,
Commodore Schmidlapp, bringing with him...
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53. a fantastic new invention
from the Big Ben's research laboratory?
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54. Please, no more questions
about that ship.
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55. What about that exploding shark?
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56. Doubtless an unfortunate animal
who chanced to swallow a floating mine.
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57. I wouldn't worry about that either,
Mr. Merrick. You there, Miss-
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58. Comrade Kitanya
Irenya Tatanya Karenska Alisoff.
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59. I am from the MoscowBugle.
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60. You grace us with your presence.
May I be of service?
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61. Ifyou please to take off the mask
to give the better picture?
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62. Great Scott! Batman take off his mask?
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63. - The woman must be mad!
- Please, Chief O'Hara, all of you.
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64. This young lady
is a stranger to our shores.
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65. Her request is not unnatural,
however impossible to grant.
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66. - Impossible?
- Indeed.
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67. If Robin and I were
to remove our masks...
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68. the secret of our true identities
would be revealed.
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69. Completely destroying
their value as ace crime fighters.
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70. Sure, ma'am. Not even Commissioner Gordon
and meself know who they really are.
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71. In fact, our own relatives
we live with don't know.
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72. But your so curious costumes?
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73. Don't be put off by them, ma'am. Under this
garb, we're perfectly ordinary Americans.
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74. You are like the masked vigilantes
in the westerns, no?
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75. Certainly not! Batman and Robin
are fully deputized agents of the law.
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76. "Support your police."
That's our message.
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77. Well said, Robin.
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78. And no better way to end
this press conference.
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79. Thank you and good day.
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80. - Batman—
- Never mind. Come on. Everybody out now.
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81. We're all busy here.
Get 'em out.
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82. A fine job, Batman.
You allayed their fears magnificently.
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83. What else could I have done? If I'd told
the truth, panic would grip the city.
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84. The truth. Sure,
and what is the truth?
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85. A decoy- a strange,
anonymous warning...
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86. that Commodore Schmidlapp
is in danger to lure me into a trap.
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87. A fiendish attempt on Batman's life.
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88. You mean, while they were luring you
to a watery grave...
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89. the Commodore's yacht
was being hijacked someplace else?
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90. - Precisely.
- And who behind it? Not a clue.
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91. Tell me, Commissioner. What known
supercriminals are at large just now?
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92. I'll check at once, Batman.
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93. Bonnie, let's have the latest status report
on known supercriminals at large.
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94. - Yes, sir.
- Thank you, Bonnie.
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95. Coming up, Batman, on the closed-circuit
TV screen. Come over here.
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96. Man ]
Status report.
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97. Known supercriminals
not currently imprisoned.
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98. - The Penguin.
- That pompous waddling master of foul play.
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99. Maestro of a million
criminal umbrellas.
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100. - The Joker!
- Devilish clown prince of crime.
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101. If I only had a nickel
for every time he's baffled us.
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102. - What? The Riddler loose too?
- So it seems.
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103. Loose to plague us
with his criminal conundrums.
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104. Gosh! And the Catwoman!
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105. End of status report.
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106. Could be any one of them,
but which one? What—
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107. Which ones?
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108. Pretty fishy what happened to me
on that ladder.
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109. You mean, where there's a fish,
there could be a Penguin.
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110. But wait.
It happened at sea.
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111. See? "C" for Catwoman.
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112. Yet, an exploding shark...
was pulling my leg.
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113. - The Joker.
- It all adds up to a sinister riddle.
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114. Riddle-er.
Riddler?
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115. Oh, a thought strikes me...
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116. so dreadful, I scarcely
dare give it utterance.
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117. The four of them—
their forces combined.
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118. - Holy nightmare!
- Batman, could it be?
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119. I don't know.
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120. But I think I know
where to find a clue.
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121. Come on, Robin, to the Batcave.
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122. We haven't one moment to lose!
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123. - Ahoy, Catwoman.
- Imbecile!
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124. How many times have I told you?
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125. Never use my real name in public!
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126. You and your trained
exploding shark.
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127. Faugh! Quack!
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128. How should I know they'd have a can
of shark repellent bat spray handy?
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129. Why, you sniveling sardine!
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130. Why, you pompous puffed-up penguin!
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131. Oh, friends, make peace.
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132. Have a shake on me. -
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133. Oh, a joke a day
keeps the gloom away.
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134. Sic 'em, Hecate.
Scratch out their eyes.
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135. Take away that ravenous panther!
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136. So help me, Catwoman,
I'll feed him to the birds.
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137. I'll incapacitate the beast
with my trick confetti.
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138. United Underworld.
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139. We're about as united
as the members...
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140. of the United World headquarters
on Gotham East River.
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141. - What's the matter with you all?
- She's right.
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142. She's right. Ifwe don't manage to
somehow swallow our supercriminal pride...
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143. - I'm afraid we're going—
- Right, Mr. Riddler!
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144. Quite right.
We must hang together...
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145. or most assuredly
we shall hang separately.
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146. Oh, and what a pity
that would be-
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147. on the eve of the greatest criminal coup
anyone ever dreamed of.
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148. Aha! How did it go, Catwoman?
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149. Purr-fectly. Purr-fectly.
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150. In my disguise as Kitka...
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151. I penetrated their press conference.
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152. - The fools are completely baffled.
- Eh, but undrowned.
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153. Yes, unfortunately.
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154. Batman's boots
didn't even look damp.
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155. How's our prisoner?
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156. - Still doesn't know he's been kidnapped?
- He hasn't the foggiest.
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157. He just keeps ringing
for his confounded tea.
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158. There he goes again.
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159. - Take it to him, man.
- Oh!
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160. Ah!
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161. Ah!
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162. Come in.
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163. Your tea, Commodore Schmidlapp.
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164. Oh, thank you, steward.
Jolly good service aboard this yacht.
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165. - Oh, we strive to give satisfaction, sir.
- Ye-
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166. I say, steward, your face
has the most ghastly pallor.
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167. Are you sure you're getting enough
of the good old sea air?
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168. Oh, my duties keep me
mostly undercover, sir.
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169. Oh, too bad.
Too bad.
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170. Any notion how much longer this yacht will
remain here, fogbound off the Grand Banks?
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171. Oh, I really couldn't say, sir.
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172. Oh, well. Gives me a jolly good chance
to get caught up on my Dickens.
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173. Still, I would like to get
to Gotham City one of these days.
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174. I have a deuced clever invention
with me, you know.
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175. Stored down in the hold.
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176. Should be worth millions
ofYankee dollars. Pip, pip!
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177. Oh!
Well, "Pip! pip!" to you, sir.
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178. If you wish anything
further, just ring.
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179. Commodore Schmidlapp's
invention in our hands—
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180. the whole world
almost literally in our grasp—
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181. and Batman and Robin
still alive to block us.
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182. Everything "pip, pip"
with the prisoner, comrades.
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183. - He hasn't a clue.
- No, but I bet the Dynamic Duo has.
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184. - What?
- A clue on how we made that ship disappear.
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185. - And when they solve that—
- Of course. They'll be out to investigate.
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186. But we'll be there first.
If we hurry, that is. If we hurry.
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187. Catwoman, you tend
to this headquarters.
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188. Attention, you unfathomable finks!
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189. - Yo-ho! - Yo-ho!
- Now hear this.
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190. Call down to our secret
river-bottom dock...
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191. and prepare our submarine for sea!
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192. - Yo-ho! - Yo-ho!
- Yo-ho what?
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193. - Sir! -
Sir! - Quack.
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194. Holy Merlin the magician!
Get set for a shock.
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195. The bat camera was aimed right
at the yacht when it took this picture.
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196. So, my strange hunch was right.
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197. - I don't get it, Batman.
- Think, Robin. As you truly remarked...
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198. no one can make
a seagoing vessel simply disappear-
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199. provided it was ever
really there at all.
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200. - You mean—
- Precisely, Robin.
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201. The yacht we thought we saw
was a mere illusion...
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202. a tricky projection akin
to the common desert mirage.
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203. It deceived our naked eyes...
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204. but was blocked by the bat camera's
polarized bat filter.
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205. I think I know where that projection
came from too.
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206. Observe- that bell buoy.
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207. - What's the matter with it?
- Quite a lot, I fancy.
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208. Let's see. The coordinates
of our position were 10.3 by 69-B.
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209. Quickly. Feed those figures
into the navigational aid computer.
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210. Roger.
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211. Negative. No legal bell buoy at that position.
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212. Ha! As I surmised.
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213. An illegal projection buoy
cleverly camouflaged.
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214. Wow! Maybe the crooks
left fingerprints on it.
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215. Good thinking, Robin.
Let's find out. To the Batboat. Fast!
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216. - One thing I don't dig, Batman.
- Oh?
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217. If that ship was just a mirage,
what happened to the real one?
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218. Taken to some secret
island hideaway...
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219. with every soul aboard save one.
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220. - Commodore Schmidlapp?
- Precisely.
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221. For some baffling reason,
the hijackers needed him or his invention...
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222. as part of their criminal scheme.
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223. Keep an eye on the scope.
Watch for suspicious vessels.
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224. I'm watching, Batman.
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225. It looks like we've got
the whole ocean to ourselves.
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226. Diving planes, Mr. Bluebeard.
Hoist her three degrees.
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227. Yo-ho!
Hoist three degrees.
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228. I certainly hope you know
what you're doing, Penguin.
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229. Mr. Riddler, I ignore
your insipid insinuations!
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230. Hmm! Hah!
Mr. Joker!
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231. You're leaning
on the current control.
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232. Don't sound so bossy, if you please!
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233. My dear sir, as the poet says...
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234. "On land, you may command.
At sea, it is me. "
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235. Whistle Piping ]
- Now hear this. Now hear this.
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236. This is your captain speaking,
my fine-pinioned pirates.
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237. We're approaching the tricky buoy.
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238. Sharpen your cutlasses.
There may be skulduggery ahead!
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239. - Yo-ho!
- What?
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240. - What?
- Unidentified small craft bearing 1-1-3.
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241. Mr. Bluebeard!
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242. - Hold her steady! Up periscope!
- Yo-ho! Up periscope.
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243. Great quivering icebergs!
Just as I hoped.
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244. Watch your step, Robin.
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245. An underwater shark cage-
the source of that fiendish fish.
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246. What cruelty— stuffing a poor shark
with a ton of deadly T.N.T.
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247. True. Nothing's sacred
to those devils.
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248. Torpedoes! Torpedoes!
What are we waiting for?
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249. Chain ofcommand, Mr. Riddler.
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250. The Penguin runs a taut ship.
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251. Now hear this, Mr. Joker.
Load the torpedo tubes.
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252. Yo-ho!
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253. Load torpedo tubes.
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254. Salt and corrosion—
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255. the infamous old enemies
of the crime fighter.
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256. No prints here.
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257. Look here, Batman.
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258. That tricky mirage projector
must be behind this plate.
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259. Wow! What a set
of superpower lenses.
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260. No wonder we were fooled.
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261. Look, Robin.
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262. Holy LongJohn Silver!
A pirate periscope.
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263. They've spotted us.
Set torpedoes to automatic homing.
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264. Yo-ho! Set torpedoes
to automatic homing.
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265. You crazy bird.
Fire them off! Quickly!
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266. Mr. Morgan, kindly activate...
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267. the remote-control Penguin magnet
inside that buoy.
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268. Yo-ho!
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269. Hey!
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270. - Holy glue pot! What's going on?
- The fiends!
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271. They've converted this buoy
into a gigantic magnet.
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272. It's got us by the metallic objects
in our utility belts.
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273. Torpedo tubes armed.
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274. Batman!
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275. We're helpless
in this monstrous invisible grip.
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276. Steady, Robin.
I see one hope.
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277. What, Batman?
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278. If I can just pry loose...
my utility-belt transmitter.
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279. Mr. Joker, are you ready to fire?
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280. Yo-ho!
Ready to fire.
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281. Five, four, three, two—
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282. - Fire one!
- Fire one!
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283. Torpedoes!
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284. If I can just reverse the polarity-
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285. send out waves of superenergy.
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286. - What happened?
- Mr. Joker, fire two!
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287. Fire two!
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288. Here comes another one!
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289. You and your reconditioned
war surplus torpedoes!
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290. He must be using
a superenergy reverse polarizer.
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291. Mr. Joker, fire three!
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292. Fire three!
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293. Here comes a third one, Batman!
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294. Confound it!
The batteries are dead!
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295. This one's getting through.
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296. It is. It's getting through.
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297. - Yo-ho-ho-ho!
- Yo-ho-ho-ho!
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298. Surface, Mr. Bluebeard.
Surface.
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299. Let us feast our eyes
on the watery remains.
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300. Gosh, Batman, the nobility
of the almost-human porpoise.
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301. True, Robin. It was noble
of that animal...
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302. to hurl himself into the path
of that final torpedo.
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303. He gave his life for ours.
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304. Operator, please give me the Pentagon
in Washington, Navy Department.
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305. Oops. Too bad.
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306. Admiral Fangschliester's office.
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307. Hello. Batman speaking.
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308. - Oh, hello.
- Who is it?
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309. - Batman.
- Oh, Batman.
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310. Hello, Batman. Ahoy.
What can I do for you?
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311. Hello, Admiral.
A routine question.
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312. Have you recently sold any war surplus
submarines? And if so, to whom?
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313. Oh, just a moment.
I'll have to look that up.
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314. Keep practicing.
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315. Answer affirmative, Batman.
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316. We disposed of a war surplus submarine
last Friday— a preatomic model.
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317. To some chap named P.N. Gwynne.
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318. - P.N. Gwynne?
- The Penguin.
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319. Did this P.N. Gwynne
leave an address?
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320. No. Just a post office box number.
Would you like it?
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321. No, thank you, Admiral.
You've been very helpful.
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322. Avast and belay, Batman.
Your tone sounds rather grim.
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323. We haven't done
anything foolish, have we?
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324. Disposing of preatomic submarines...
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325. to persons who don't even
leave their full addresses?
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326. Good day, Admiral.
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327. Gosh.
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328. The Penguin in command
of a preatomic submarine.
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329. Grave situation, Robin.
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330. If only we knew what he was up to, what he was—
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331. Holy Polaris!
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332. From that submarine, no doubt.
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333. That missile!
Look, it's written something.
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334. A riddle—
in the form of a joke.
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335. Let's race back
to headquarters, Robin.
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336. You know what this means, don't you?
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337. Our blackest fears confirmed.
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338. Penguin, Joker, Riddler- those three
supercriminals, their forces combined.
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339. For heaven only knows
what infamous objective.
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340. It may be worse
than that, gentlemen.
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341. - Worse?
- Saints alive. How can that be?
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342. Look at this pair of joking riddles.
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343. "What does a turkey do
when he flies upside down?"
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344. - He gobbles up.
- Of course.
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345. And number two.
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346. "What weighs six ounces,
sits in a tree and is very dangerous?"
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347. - A sparrow with a machine gun.
- Yes, of course.
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348. Now combine both answers.
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349. What kind of creature
would gobble up a bird in a tree?
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350. Heaven protect us!
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351. - A cat! - A cat!
- Yes, gentlemen.
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352. The criminal catalyst
in this entire affair-
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353. our old archenemy Catwoman.
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354. Penguin, Joker, Riddler
and Catwoman too.
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355. The sum of the angles of that rectangle
is too monstrous to contemplate.
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356. We've been given
the plainest warning.
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357. - They're working together to take over-
- To take over what, Batman?
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358. - Gotham City?
- Any two of them might try that.
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359. The whole country?
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360. If it were three of them,
I would say yes. But four?
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361. Their minimum objective must be...
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362. the entire world.
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363. The United World Building,
dear comrades in crime.
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364. Our objective- the Security Council.
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365. Sitting like fat birds in a tree,
just waiting to be snatched.
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366. And you bungled it again!
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367. Again the Dynamic Duo
escaped our trap!
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368. Faugh! Passing porpoises
which intercept torpedoes.
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369. There ought to be
a piscatorial statute.
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370. Time is getting short!
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371. We've got to get Batman
before he gets us.
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372. Mmm. Perhaps I could lure him
into the fatal embrace...
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373. of a giant exploding octopus.
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374. You silly bird! They've just been through
one of your fishy explosions.
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375. - And they're still in one piece.
- Indeed?
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376. I suppose they'll be broken up
by your moldy jokes.
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377. - Aw—
- Shut up, all of you!
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378. I see the way to do it.
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379. We'll play each of our
treacherous trumps in one hand...
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380. and we'll do it right here.
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381. - How?
- How? The end.
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382. The end. Oh, boy.
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383. We shall spring them
from the Joker's jack-in-the-box...
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384. through that window,
out over the sea...
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385. and into the waiting arms...
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386. of the Penguin's exploding octopus.
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387. The trigger?
One of my riddles, of course.
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388. And the bait?
You, Catwoman.
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389. You're mad, Riddler.
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390. The minute Batman spots her,
he'll bop her with a batarang.
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391. You don't understand,Joker.
Copy !req
392. She will be disguised as Kitka.
Copy !req
393. And as Kitka, she shall lure
some millionaire into a kidnap trap—
Copy !req
394. Of course. With a clever clue
pointing here.
Copy !req
395. Oh! Which will make Batman
race to the rescue.
Copy !req
396. Capital!
Copy !req
397. But who are we going to kidnap?
Copy !req
398. Ah. I know the perfect victim.
Copy !req
399. I know the perfect victim.
Copy !req
400. I know the perfect— Bruce Wayne...
Copy !req
401. the millionaire head of that disgusting
do-gooding Wayne Foundation.
Copy !req
402. Ooh! Delicious!
Copy !req
403. Just the sort of square citizen
Batman will dash to rescue.
Copy !req
404. - Then snap!
- Into the combination trap.
Copy !req
405. Purr-fect, Riddler.
Purr-fect. Mmm!
Copy !req
406. Comrade Wayne, my name is Kitanya
Irenya Tatanya Karenska Alisoff.
Copy !req
407. I'm from the Moscow Bugle.
My friends call me Kitka.
Copy !req
408. Kitka.
Copy !req
409. Kitka— a charming acronym.
Copy !req
410. Thank you, Comrade Wayne.
Copy !req
411. You know, the fame
of the Wayne Foundation...
Copy !req
412. is known from Leningrad
to Kamchatka.
Copy !req
413. It works for peace
and understanding.
Copy !req
414. Why, your own picture has appeared
countless times in the MoscowBugle.
Copy !req
415. I'm most grateful.
I wasn't aware of that.
Copy !req
416. Oh, da. Da
Copy !req
417. You say you found these riddles
written on Wayne Foundation stationery...
Copy !req
418. slipped under the door
of your borrowed penthouse apartment?
Copy !req
419. Yes, Comrade Wayne.
That is why I brought them to you.
Copy !req
420. At first, I thought
it was some foolishness.
Copy !req
421. But then I remembered—
Copy !req
422. Is there not a bourgeois criminal cad
in this country called the Riddler...
Copy !req
423. who preys upon
the workers ofAmerica?
Copy !req
424. Your jargon is quaint, Miss Kitka.
Copy !req
425. But, uh, there is
such a creature, I believe.
Copy !req
426. Well, what do we do now...
Copy !req
427. report these riddles
to your police or-
Copy !req
428. or perhaps to that
masked Cossack Batman?
Copy !req
429. Well, that's hardly
necessary at the moment.
Copy !req
430. Doubtless it's the work
of some harmless crank.
Copy !req
431. Nevertheless, shall we
give this matter...
Copy !req
432. further consideration
over dinner tonight?
Copy !req
433. Oh, what a purr-fectly lovely idea.
Copy !req
434. I'll telephone,
if you'll excuse me...
Copy !req
435. to cancel a previous engagement.
Copy !req
436. Alfred will see you to the door.
Copy !req
437. Do vechara.
Copy !req
438. Do vechara, Comrade Wayne.
Copy !req
439. - Oh, Alfred.
- Yes, sir?
Copy !req
440. See Miss Kitka out, please.
Take the service elevator.
Copy !req
441. - Meet me in the Batcave. Emergency.
- Very good, sir. Yes.
Copy !req
442. Robin, listen to these riddles.
Copy !req
443. Tell me if you
interpret them as I do.
Copy !req
444. One. What has yellow skin
and writes?
Copy !req
445. - A ballpoint banana.
- Right.
Copy !req
446. Two. What people
are always in a hurry?
Copy !req
447. Rushing people?
Russians.
Copy !req
448. Right again. Now, what
would you say they mean?
Copy !req
449. Banana. Russian.
I've got it!
Copy !req
450. Someone Russian is gonna slip
on a banana peel and break their neck.
Copy !req
451. Precisely, Robin—
the only possible meaning.
Copy !req
452. A clear threat to Miss Kitka's life.
Copy !req
453. - Who?
- Miss Kitka.
Copy !req
454. The charming Russian journalist
for the Moscow Bugle.
Copy !req
455. In some baffling way, she must have
unwittingly stumbled on the criminals' plot.
Copy !req
456. What is the scheme, sir?
Copy !req
457. Tonight, Bruce Wayne
will go out on the town with Miss Kitka.
Copy !req
458. A not displeasing chore, sir.
Copy !req
459. Indeed, Alfred.
I've rarely met a girl...
Copy !req
460. who is such a potent argument
in favor of international relations.
Copy !req
461. However, you and Robin will dog
our footsteps in the Batmobile.
Copy !req
462. - You'll keep constant watch via the
micro-TV bat scanner. - Sure.
Copy !req
463. If the Riddler tries to make good
on his filthy threat—
Copy !req
464. I'll bash him brutally.
Copy !req
465. - Then we close in for the kill with the police.
- Precisely.
Copy !req
466. - Alfred, do you have your driver's license?
- In my wallet, sir.
Copy !req
467. Good man. Drive carefully.
Good luck. Good hunting.
Copy !req
468. This may prove to be
a most memorable night.
Copy !req
469. This curtain which separates
our countries is so foolish.
Copy !req
470. If we could just
contrive some way...
Copy !req
471. of getting more deeply
involved with each other.
Copy !req
472. Oh, da.
Copy !req
473. Da We must search
for such a method.
Copy !req
474. I don't think it's right
for us to listen in to this, Alfred.
Copy !req
475. I mean, some things have to be private,
even for a crime fighter.
Copy !req
476. Your discretion is admirable,
Master Robin. Yes.
Copy !req
477. - Time for another check-in, is
it not, Master Robin? - Roger.
Copy !req
478. Commissioner.
Copy !req
479. Yes? Oh.
Copy !req
480. Yes, Boy Wonder?
Copy !req
481. Batmobile position:
Gotham Central Park...
Copy !req
482. proceeding south on West Drive.
Copy !req
483. About to pass
Benedict Arnold Monument.
Copy !req
484. Great Scott.
Still in the park?
Copy !req
485. It's been almost an hour.
What the devil are they doing?
Copy !req
486. No comment, Commissioner.
Copy !req
487. Let's just say, no sign
of criminal activity.
Copy !req
488. Uh, yes, I understand.
Copy !req
489. I've just thought
of a clever ruse, Commissioner.
Copy !req
490. Send Chief O'Hara up to the roof
and have him flash the bat signal.
Copy !req
491. Well, certainly, if you
say so, Boy Wonder. But why?
Copy !req
492. When the crooks see it, they'll figure
Batman and I are racing to headquarters.
Copy !req
493. Thinking we're out of the way
might make them play into our hands...
Copy !req
494. with an immediate strike
at Miss Kitka.
Copy !req
495. Clever. Devilishly clever.
Copy !req
496. Thank you, sir.
Batmobile over and out.
Copy !req
497. Right.
Copy !req
498. Chief O'Hara. Dash to the roof.
Flash the bat signal.
Copy !req
499. Yes, sir.
Copy !req
500. Oh, shades ofSmolensk.
What is that?
Copy !req
501. Incredible. I don't-
Copy !req
502. Ah, of course.
Copy !req
503. - How clever.
- Clever, Comrade Wayne?
Copy !req
504. I mean clever device, Miss Kitka.
Copy !req
505. It's the famous bat signal flashed
from the roof of police headquarters.
Copy !req
506. - Oh. - Batman and Robin must be
racing there now in response to it.
Copy !req
507. Then you did get the police
to call them in.
Copy !req
508. - For my protection.
- Hmm?
Copy !req
509. - Yes. Yes.
- Oh.
Copy !req
510. How purr-fectly wonderful of you.
Copy !req
511. Mmm! I close my eyes...
Copy !req
512. and I dream of all those
savage Cossacks...
Copy !req
513. racing over the steppes
on their brutal mission.
Copy !req
514. Mmm.
Copy !req
515. How strange.
Copy !req
516. I close my eyes,
and I dream of something...
Copy !req
517. quite astonishingly different.
Copy !req
518. Da, da.
Keep your eyes closed.
Copy !req
519. Continue with this dream.
Copy !req
520. The dream continues.
Copy !req
521. Da. Da.
Copy !req
522. - It approaches a climax.
- No. Nyet.
Copy !req
523. Not so fast.
Be more slow.
Copy !req
524. - Miss Kitka.
- Hmm?
Copy !req
525. May I see you home
to that borrowed penthouse apartment?
Copy !req
526. He swallowed the cat bait.
Copy !req
527. And now to make him bat bait.
Copy !req
528. Finks Morgan, Bluebeard and Quetch,
break out the jet-pack umbrellas.
Copy !req
529. Yo-ho-ho, sir!
Copy !req
530. Excuse me.
Copy !req
531. I'll slip into something more comfortable
while your cocoa is warming.
Copy !req
532. Is that prudent, Master Robin?
Copy !req
533. Our instructions were to keep watch.
Copy !req
534. I don't know
about prudent, Alfred...
Copy !req
535. but it's sure as heck
the only decent thing to do.
Copy !req
536. Hmm. Perhaps.
Copy !req
537. Yes. Yes.
Copy !req
538. Ah! There it is!
Copy !req
539. Seventy-third Street and Concord Avenue.
Copy !req
540. Follow me.
Down to the terrace.
Copy !req
541. Ho!
Copy !req
542. "And all my days are trances...
Copy !req
543. "and all my nightly dreams are
where thy dark eye glances...
Copy !req
544. and where thy footstep gleams. "
Copy !req
545. ...Comrade Wayne.
Copy !req
546. Edgar Allan Poe, Miss Kitka.
Copy !req
547. "To One in Paradise. "
First stanza.
Copy !req
548. About that dream you had.
Copy !req
549. - Do we dare?
- Why not?
Copy !req
550. Yes, of course.
Why not?
Copy !req
551. Of what use is a dream
if not a blueprint for courageous action?
Copy !req
552. Oh! Into action, comrade. Mmm!
Copy !req
553. Miss Kitka, I have
the strangest feeling...
Copy !req
554. that I am about to be
utterly and madly carried away.
Copy !req
555. - Aha! Aha!
- This is a kidnapping!
Copy !req
556. Our joke's on you!
Copy !req
557. You filthy criminals.
Copy !req
558. - Much as one deplores indiscretion, Master Robin—
- You're right, Alfred.
Copy !req
559. I'll just take one tiny, tiny peek.
Copy !req
560. - Holy demolition!
- Bless my dustpan!
Copy !req
561. Cover the exits, Alfred.
I'll race up there with my bat rope.
Copy !req
562. Very good, sir.
Copy !req
563. Holy Halloween!
Copy !req
564. Huh! Strange. Batman should
have been here hours ago.
Copy !req
565. Perhaps you didn't leave
a clear-enough clue in your apartment.
Copy !req
566. Of course I did. I can't understand
why Batman hasn't dashed into our trap.
Copy !req
567. It's all set.
Copy !req
568. He puts his foot here,
my secret jack-in-the-box fires...
Copy !req
569. shooting him out through the window,
out over the sea...
Copy !req
570. into the waiting arms
of Penguin's exploding octopus.
Copy !req
571. What a deliciously humorous trajectory.
Copy !req
572. And nothing to link us
with the crime.
Copy !req
573. Quacking ] - [ Yowling ]
Copy !req
574. You abominable outlaws.
Copy !req
575. What have you done with Miss Kitka?
Copy !req
576. She's quite well, Mr. Wayne.
Copy !req
577. I swear, by heaven,
if you've harmed that girl...
Copy !req
578. I'll kill you all.
Copy !req
579. I'll rend you limb from limb!
Copy !req
580. Mr. Wayne, must you be so impulsive?
Copy !req
581. Where is she, Catwoman?
Show me Miss Kitka...
Copy !req
582. or I'll wreck this place
with my dying breath!
Copy !req
583. Blindfold the captive.
Copy !req
584. Lead him down the labyrinthine path
to Chamber 17.
Copy !req
585. Two minutes. No more.
Copy !req
586. - Turn on the secret microphone.
- Yo-ho!
Copy !req
587. Quiet. Quiet.
Copy !req
588. - Miss Kitka.
- Comrade Wayne.
Copy !req
589. - Are you all right?
- Da. Da.
Copy !req
590. I'll curse myself
forever, Miss Kitka.
Copy !req
591. This nasty soup we're in
is largely of my own brewing.
Copy !req
592. If I hadn't let your beauty
lull me off guard—
Copy !req
593. Off guard, comrade?
Copy !req
594. There are some things
I cannot disclose, Miss Kitka.
Copy !req
595. Suffice it to say that we're in the hands
of the underworld's most vicious foursome.
Copy !req
596. I fear we have...
Copy !req
597. nothing to look forward to but death.
Copy !req
598. It may not be that black,
Comrade Wayne.
Copy !req
599. Batman and Robin are
probably hot on our trail.
Copy !req
600. From something
I happened to overhear...
Copy !req
601. I think we are merely
bait for Batman.
Copy !req
602. Once he is in their trap,
we will be released.
Copy !req
603. A slender hope, Miss Kitka.
Copy !req
604. More slender than you can know.
Copy !req
605. You do not think
Batman will get here?
Copy !req
606. That I cannot say.
Copy !req
607. Tell me. Did you
overhear any mention...
Copy !req
608. of any other prisoner
of this rotten gang?
Copy !req
609. No, I did not, Mr. Wayne.
Copy !req
610. Who on earth could you mean?
Copy !req
611. Commodore Schmidlapp
ringing for his tea.
Copy !req
612. Oh, just a thought.
It doesn't matter.
Copy !req
613. A speedy escape is our only hope.
Copy !req
614. A moment while I think.
Copy !req
615. I've got it. Why didn't I think of it sooner?
Copy !req
616. Of what, Comrade Wayne?
Copy !req
617. Up my left sleeve...
Copy !req
618. I have a tiny radio transmitter
strapped above my elbow.
Copy !req
619. - What a curious device to carry.
- Not at all, Miss Kitka.
Copy !req
620. Capitalists like myself
who carry large sums of money...
Copy !req
621. often have such safety contrivances.
Copy !req
622. If I can just get at it.
Copy !req
623. Quickly. Wiggle around back to back.
Copy !req
624. Maybe you can reach it
with your fingers.
Copy !req
625. Da.
Copy !req
626. Let's get him.
Copy !req
627. There we are.
Copy !req
628. You think you're pretty clever,
don't you, Mr. Wayne?
Copy !req
629. Clever enough to outwit you,
you stupid thug.
Copy !req
630. Well, we'll see about that.
Copy !req
631. Dear colleagues,
let's see what's strapped...
Copy !req
632. about this fellow's left elbow,
shall we?
Copy !req
633. Credulous creatures!
Copy !req
634. I knew you'd be listening in.
Copy !req
635. I told you that fish story
about a radio-
Copy !req
636. Get him, you mollycoddles!
Copy !req
637. Miss— Miss Kitka, where are you?
Copy !req
638. - Great day in the morning! -
Bruce! - Hello, Commissioner.
Copy !req
639. Come on, Dick. We're late for that
important demonstration at the fish hatchery.
Copy !req
640. - Roger.
- Excuse us, Commissioner.
Copy !req
641. Great Scott! You can't dash off now.
Where were you held? How did you escape?
Copy !req
642. I escaped with the aid of Batman.
Copy !req
643. Thank goodness the Caped Crusader
got there in time!
Copy !req
644. Yes, Commissioner, and you'd better
return to police headquarters.
Copy !req
645. He may wish to call you there.
Good day, Commissioner.
Copy !req
646. And so, my fine,
"finkish" friends...
Copy !req
647. you have heard
my astounding proposal.
Copy !req
648. What do you say?
Copy !req
649. What do you say?
Copy !req
650. One thing is certain.
Our strike cannot be postponed.
Copy !req
651. We're at the mercy
of the Gotham River tide.
Copy !req
652. Riddler's right for once.
Copy !req
653. It's now or never
if we're to get through the channel.
Copy !req
654. Well, make up your minds!
The Batman will never come here now.
Copy !req
655. But the police will— any instant.
Copy !req
656. So, to the Penguin's
princely plan...
Copy !req
657. is it yes or no?
Copy !req
658. I say it's crazy.
Copy !req
659. But I say let's try it. We have to do
something to get Batman out of the way.
Copy !req
660. Oh, go ahead, Penguin.
Copy !req
661. Mr. Joker, would you
drop one of your little dream pills...
Copy !req
662. into Commodore Schmidlapp's tea?
Copy !req
663. - Mmm! Presto!
- And then carry him down to the submarine.
Copy !req
664. Yo-ho!
Copy !req
665. Mr. Riddler, will you
tell Mr. Quetch...
Copy !req
666. - to fetch the five guinea pigs?
- Ah!
Copy !req
667. - Quetch, fetch the five guinea pigs.
- Yo-ho!
Copy !req
668. Oh. Oh.
Copy !req
669. Yo-ho-ho, sir!
Copy !req
670. Now, my fine, fishy finks...
Copy !req
671. you see here Commodore Schmidlapp's
pièce de no résistance—
Copy !req
672. an instant whiskey maker.
Copy !req
673. Waiting for us
to put it to more universal use.
Copy !req
674. Now, don't be afraid.
Copy !req
675. You will feel nothing.
Copy !req
676. Now I am merely going
to temporarily extract...
Copy !req
677. every bit of moisture
from your body.
Copy !req
678. It's a painless operation.
Copy !req
679. Oh!
Copy !req
680. - Delightful!
- Dehydrated.
Copy !req
681. Catwoman— Catwoman,
will you get a dustpan...
Copy !req
682. and put every one of them
very carefully into a separate vial?
Copy !req
683. Ooh! All right.
Copy !req
684. Mr. Riddler, would you prepare
the submarine to get under way...
Copy !req
685. while I prepare
a demolition charge...
Copy !req
686. of terrifying thrust
to welcome the police?
Copy !req
687. - Where do we meet?
- United World Building.
Copy !req
688. - United World Building.
- On the Gotham East River.
Copy !req
689. - East River.
- Thirty-ninth floor.
Copy !req
690. - Thirty-ninth floor.
- I'll be waiting at the elevator.
Copy !req
691. - One hour? One hour.
- One hour.
Copy !req
692. Here you are.
Copy !req
693. Oh, what mere
criminal genius, Catwoman!
Copy !req
694. Who else but a genius
could conceive such an audacious plot...
Copy !req
695. to deliberately trick
Batman and Robin...
Copy !req
696. into inviting me
into their secret Batcave...
Copy !req
697. with five dehydrated,
death-dealing pirates at my command?
Copy !req
698. Careful, careful.
Copy !req
699. Every one of them has a mother.
Copy !req
700. Out batarang and bat rope.
Stand clear.
Copy !req
701. When you think, Batman,
with people in weird outfits—
Copy !req
702. like the four supercrooks
hanging around here—
Copy !req
703. it's amazing someone hasn't already
reported this place to the police.
Copy !req
704. It's a low neighborhood,
full of rumpots.
Copy !req
705. They're used to curious sights,
which they attribute to alcoholic delusions.
Copy !req
706. Gosh, drinking's sure
a filthy thing, isn't it?
Copy !req
707. - I'd rather be dead than unable
to trust my own eyes. - Uh-huh.
Copy !req
708. You're right, honey.
There was somebody walking up the wall.
Copy !req
709. Ready with superblinding
bat pellets.
Copy !req
710. - Away, Robin. Away!
- But-But—
Copy !req
711. Come on, Batman!
Batman!
Copy !req
712. Miss Kitka! Miss Ki—
Copy !req
713. Oh!
Copy !req
714. Quick! Everyone,
flee for your lives!
Copy !req
715. Into the street!
Copy !req
716. Look out! Look out, please!
Copy !req
717. Some days, you just can't
get rid of a bomb.
Copy !req
718. Batman!
Copy !req
719. Batman!
Copy !req
720. It's all right, Robin.
Copy !req
721. Holy heart failure!
Copy !req
722. Fortunately, I was able to dispose
of that bomb in the nick oftime...
Copy !req
723. and shield myself
behind these heavy iron pipes.
Copy !req
724. You risked your life to save
that riffraff in the bar?
Copy !req
725. They may be drinkers, Robin,
but they're also human beings...
Copy !req
726. and may be salvaged.
Copy !req
727. I had to do it.
Copy !req
728. But we've lost the trail of that angelic
Miss Kitka. Stranded without a clue.
Copy !req
729. Ahoy there.
Copy !req
730. Could you chaps
direct me to a policeman?
Copy !req
731. Commodore Schmidlapp's the name.
Copy !req
732. Big Ben Distilleries, you know.
Copy !req
733. Holy costume party.
That's the Penguin.
Copy !req
734. - Obviously.
- What's his game? I wonder.
Copy !req
735. What's your game, Penguin?
Copy !req
736. Penguin?
Copy !req
737. No, my name's Schmidlapp,
old boy. Schmidlapp.
Copy !req
738. Your fingerprints
will settle that hash, Penguin.
Copy !req
739. We'll check them against
our mobile anticrime file in our Batmobile.
Copy !req
740. Let's see your hands.
Copy !req
741. Looks like...
plastic-coated fingertips.
Copy !req
742. Yes, I scorched myself
pressing a waistcoast.
Copy !req
743. I do believe that the attending surgeon
did use plastic, yes.
Copy !req
744. It looks bad, Batman.
This brassy bird has us buffaloed.
Copy !req
745. Not quite, Robin.
Copy !req
746. There's one method of identification
which no criminal can evade.
Copy !req
747. Retinal eye patterns?
Copy !req
748. He's right, Robin.
The pattern of myriad, tiny blood vessels...
Copy !req
749. in the retina of the eye—
as individual as a fingerprint.
Copy !req
750. But don't you have a complete
anti-criminal eye pattern master file...
Copy !req
751. in your fabulous Batcave?
Copy !req
752. - Why don't you take me there?
- You'd be willing to submit yourself to a test?
Copy !req
753. Why, of course. It might be an amusing
experience, don't you know?
Copy !req
754. Stand by to catch him, Robin.
I'll give him the bat gas.
Copy !req
755. Oh-ho, what's that?
Ba-Bat gas?
Copy !req
756. A harmless anesthetic...
Copy !req
757. necessary to prevent you
from seeing the entrance to the Batcave.
Copy !req
758. If anyone knew that, they could pierce
the secret of our true identities.
Copy !req
759. Ready, Commodore?
Copy !req
760. Oh, I say. What deucedly strange customs
you colonials have. What?
Copy !req
761. Well, I'm ready.
Copy !req
762. To the Batmobile. This could be
the break we've been looking for.
Copy !req
763. He's the Penguin, all right.
Copy !req
764. - I wonder why he let us bring him here.
- We'll soon find out.
Copy !req
765. - I'll set up the anticrime eye checker.
- Stay on the alert, Robin.
Copy !req
766. After I give him the bat wake,
we must be ready for anything.
Copy !req
767. Well, now.
Copy !req
768. Oh, it's you.
Copy !req
769. We're here, eh? I see.
Copy !req
770. Oh, I s- This—
Copy !req
771. Oh, say!
Copy !req
772. This is extraordinary!
Copy !req
773. It's absolutely extraordinary!
Copy !req
774. I must say that your laboratory...
Copy !req
775. exceeds the limits
of man's wildest imagination!
Copy !req
776. Absolutely. And could I trouble you
for a glass ofwater?
Copy !req
777. Your bat gas seems to have
left me with a somewhat...
Copy !req
778. parched sensation.
Copy !req
779. Over there. The drinking water
dispenser is clearly marked.
Copy !req
780. Oh, yeah. Thank you.
Thank you, sir.
Copy !req
781. Thank you very much, sir.
Thank you, sir.
Copy !req
782. Help yourself, Commodore.
Slake your thirst.
Copy !req
783. You'll have worse than a parched sensation
when we're through with you.
Copy !req
784. Perhaps, perhaps.
But I am appalled by your attitude, sir.
Copy !req
785. I mean, condemning me before the facts
have been authoritatively established.
Copy !req
786. Yes. You are abrogating...
Copy !req
787. my constitutional rights, sir.
Copy !req
788. - All set, Batman.
- Come on, Penguin.
Copy !req
789. Time to rip off your false feathers.
Copy !req
790. Coming, Batman.
Copy !req
791. I am coming at once.
Copy !req
792. - Holy hallucination!
- I wish it were, Robin, but it's not.
Copy !req
793. It's five dehydrated pirates-
rehydrated.
Copy !req
794. At 'em, me hearties!
Shiver 'em from stem to stern!
Copy !req
795. Yo-ho-ho, sir!
Copy !req
796. Attack them, you faltering fink!
Copy !req
797. The pirates- they're gone!
Popped like balloons! How'd it happen?
Copy !req
798. Whoever dehydrated those pirates...
Copy !req
799. could not have foreseen
their accidental rehydration...
Copy !req
800. with the heavy water
we use in recharging the atomic pile!
Copy !req
801. Which naturally left them
in a highly unstable condition!
Copy !req
802. You saw it yourself, Robin.
Copy !req
803. The slightest impact
was sufficient...
Copy !req
804. to instantly reduce them
to antimatter.
Copy !req
805. Antimatter?
Copy !req
806. You mean they...
won't be coming back?
Copy !req
807. No, Robin.
Copy !req
808. Not in this universe.
Copy !req
809. Let that be an object lesson...
Copy !req
810. in the dangers of tampering with
the laws of Mother Nature.
Copy !req
811. My apologies, Commodore Schmidlapp.
Copy !req
812. It's clear that I've done you
a cruel injustice.
Copy !req
813. - You have?
- You were duped, brainwashed.
Copy !req
814. The criminals planted
those dehydrated thugs on your person.
Copy !req
815. You were obviously
under the influence...
Copy !req
816. of posthypnotic suggestion
when you rehydrated them.
Copy !req
817. Come on down, Commodore.
Copy !req
818. Another sniff of bat gas,
and we'll all return to the city.
Copy !req
819. Are you sure you didn't hurt your head
in that fight, Batman?
Copy !req
820. Perfectly.
Swallow this pill.
Copy !req
821. Now give our friend here
a whiff of bat wake.
Copy !req
822. Good morning.
Copy !req
823. - What's wrong, Batman?
- Manifold pressure's dropping.
Copy !req
824. I think we'd better stop and check.
Copy !req
825. Sorry about that, Commodore.
Copy !req
826. - Won't take a minute.
- Oh, yes, it will!
Copy !req
827. Hey!
Copy !req
828. Yo-ho!
Copy !req
829. And away we go in my "Birdmobile"!
One side, Caped Crusader.
Copy !req
830. - You okay, Robin? - I sure am, Batman,
thanks to that anti-Penguin gas pill.
Copy !req
831. The pompous fool.
He's played right into our hands.
Copy !req
832. Quickly.
Via Batcycle to the Batcopter.
Copy !req
833. We'll track him
to the gang's new hideout.
Copy !req
834. Disengage go-cart.
Copy !req
835. Bat scanner tracking
the stolen Batmobile perfectly.
Copy !req
836. Port, two degrees.
And steady as she goes.
Copy !req
837. Yo-ho!
Port, two degrees!
Copy !req
838. We're almost there.
Copy !req
839. - Oh. Oh.
- Hey, Riddler, where are you going?
Copy !req
840. To fire off some more
of my riddling clues, of course.
Copy !req
841. - Riddler!
- Yes?
Copy !req
842. You're mad, Riddler.
Penguin's finished Batman by now.
Copy !req
843. That miserable, waddling
mountebank of a bird.
Copy !req
844. He couldn't finish a bag of popcorn.
Copy !req
845. So, say Penguin failed. All the more reason
not to hand them your crazy clues.
Copy !req
846. Oh, but I must. I must.
Oh, outwitting Batman is my sole delight...
Copy !req
847. my joy, my heaven on Earth...
Copy !req
848. my very paradise.
Copy !req
849. Riddler! Come back!
Copy !req
850. Stolen Batmobile turning.
Copy !req
851. Now heading up Gotham River Drive.
Copy !req
852. Voilà.
Copy !req
853. Batman! Polaris-type missile
coming right for us.
Copy !req
854. Hold tight, Robin.
This may be tricky.
Copy !req
855. - Damage?
- The tail rotor disengaged.
Copy !req
856. Brace yourself, Robin.
We're going down.
Copy !req
857. This could be the end.
Copy !req
858. Ooh, ooh!
Copy !req
859. Now to find my riddling Polaris skywriter.
Copy !req
860. Look! Look!
The Dynamic Duo!
Copy !req
861. Giggling ] - [ Yowling ]
Copy !req
862. I got them.
I got them.
Copy !req
863. Holy horseshoe!
Copy !req
864. Some luck, landing right on top
of a bed of foam rubber.
Copy !req
865. Yes, Robin.
I'd say the odds against it...
Copy !req
866. would make even
the most reckless gambler cringe.
Copy !req
867. True, I did think I'd spotted it
out of the corner of my eye.
Copy !req
868. But—
Copy !req
869. That crazy missile- It wrote
two more riddles before it blew up.
Copy !req
870. "What goes up white...
Copy !req
871. and comes down yellow and white"?
Copy !req
872. An egg!
Copy !req
873. "How do you divide seventeen apples...
Copy !req
874. among sixteen people?"
Copy !req
875. - Make applesauce.
- Apples into applesauce—
Copy !req
876. a unification
into one smooth mixture.
Copy !req
877. An egg—
nature's perfect container...
Copy !req
878. the container
of all our hopes for the future.
Copy !req
879. A unification
and a container of hope?
Copy !req
880. - United World Organization!
- Precisely, Robin!
Copy !req
881. And there's a special meeting
of the Security Council today.
Copy !req
882. - If what I fear is true-
- Wow! Let's commandeer a taxi!
Copy !req
883. No, Robin!
Not at this time of day.
Copy !req
884. Luckily, we're in tip-top condition.
Copy !req
885. It'll be faster if we run.
Let's go!
Copy !req
886. We are now passing
through the grotto.
Copy !req
887. - Depth: a half fathom.
- Engines: dead slow astern.
Copy !req
888. Yo-ho! Dead slow astern.
Copy !req
889. Ah, good.
Just as the blueprints said—
Copy !req
890. an abandoned construction elevator.
Copy !req
891. Hecate, sniff out the weak spot.
Copy !req
892. - I hope Penguin made it.
- Who needs him?
Copy !req
893. Stand back.
Copy !req
894. Hey! Can't you read?
Copy !req
895. Fine day for penguins.
Looks like rain.
Copy !req
896. Yo-ho! My criminal coconspirators.
We meet as planned.
Copy !req
897. And, no thanks to you,
the Dynamic Duo has been silenced forever.
Copy !req
898. - - And blasted out of the sky
by an incredible coincidence.
Copy !req
899. Oh, the delicious irony of it all.
Copy !req
900. Downed by one of Riddler's
Polaris skywriters.
Copy !req
901. Oh, happy happenstance!
Copy !req
902. Now, hold your breath
as we cross the hall.
Copy !req
903. There are still lingering traces
of my finely filtered Penguin gas.
Copy !req
904. Holy marathon!
I'm getting a stitch, Batman.
Copy !req
905. Let's hope it's a stitch in time, Robin,
that saves nine-
Copy !req
906. the nine members
of the United World Security Council.
Copy !req
907. Gentlemen, it is the considered opinion
of Her Majesty's Government...
Copy !req
908. that we pursue peace at all costs.
Copy !req
909. Our poor, united world in microcosm.
Copy !req
910. I'm afraid
they'll find our humor very, very dry.
Copy !req
911. Gentlemen, my country
understands your position...
Copy !req
912. but in the interest of peace,
we must—
Copy !req
913. We are doing everything in our possible power.
Copy !req
914. Gentlemen, it has always
been our policy to maintain—
Copy !req
915. Quickly now!
Each one in a separate vial.
Copy !req
916. And, boys, don't anybody sneeze.
Copy !req
917. Emergency!
Seal this building!
Copy !req
918. - And turn off the ventilating system!
- Robin's right.
Copy !req
919. The entire Security Council
may have been dehydrated.
Copy !req
920. Emergency, operator!
Emergency! Get me security!
Copy !req
921. Emergency, operator!
Emergency! Get me security!
Copy !req
922. Up. Up. Up. Up. Up. "Up"!
Copy !req
923. Surrender, you criminals!
Copy !req
924. United Underworld is through!
Copy !req
925. Faugh! What's this, an apparition?
Copy !req
926. One false move, and you'll find out.
We'll hurl our batarangs.
Copy !req
927. - To the elevator, boys!
- Catwoman, stop, I said!
Copy !req
928. I don't think you mean that, Batman.
Copy !req
929. Miss Kitka dies
if you take one more step. Go!
Copy !req
930. This way, Robin!
Copy !req
931. The Security Council— gone!
Copy !req
932. What a fiendishly clever way to abduct
nine men from a heavily guarded building.
Copy !req
933. Where does that elevator go?
Copy !req
934. Downstairs, obviously...
Copy !req
935. to an abandoned submarine dock
on the river.
Copy !req
936. Holy Captain Nemo!
Copy !req
937. They'll head for sea
by way of Short Island Sound.
Copy !req
938. We have just one
trump card left, Robin.
Copy !req
939. Heaven help the world if we fail.
Copy !req
940. Come on!
Copy !req
941. Down periscope.
We're over the last bar.
Copy !req
942. Mr. Bluebeard,
all engines full ahead.
Copy !req
943. Yo-ho! All engines full ahead.
Copy !req
944. What a delightful haul!
Copy !req
945. Mr. Riddler, will you kindly prepare
those nine radio ransom messages?
Copy !req
946. - All right, all right.
- And none of your stupid riddles. Do you understand?
Copy !req
947. Make those messages plain.
Copy !req
948. One billion dollars cash
from each country.
Copy !req
949. Precisely, Mr. Riddler.
To be delivered to our secret island...
Copy !req
950. by the horde of trained
carrier pigeons...
Copy !req
951. which I shall presently provide.
Copy !req
952. But no whimsical embellishments, please.
Make those messages clear!
Copy !req
953. "Make those messages clear!"
Copy !req
954. - Ooh, it's like a dream, Pengy, sweet.
- Mm-hmm.
Copy !req
955. Nothing can stop us now.
Copy !req
956. Sonar contact.
Range: 8,000. Bearing: 1-8-1.
Copy !req
957. Yo-ho! Sonar contact.
Copy !req
958. Small craft at 7,500.
Bearing: 0-1.
Copy !req
959. What? Small craft?
Copy !req
960. It's moving incredibly fast, sir.
Range is down to 7,000.
Copy !req
961. - It's the Batboat!
- Faugh! Drat that cockleshell!
Copy !req
962. Mr. Bluebeard, steady
on the diving plane.
Copy !req
963. Yo-ho! Steady on the diving plane!
Copy !req
964. I'll man the torpedo tubes.
Copy !req
965. Mr. Riddler, would you fire
a surface-to-surface underwater homing missile?
Copy !req
966. Ah.
Copy !req
967. Missile ahoy!
Copy !req
968. Looks like it has a homing device
in its nose cone.
Copy !req
969. Get ready for evasive action.
Copy !req
970. No use, Batman.
It's tracking us.
Copy !req
971. Here. Take my bat radio.
I looked it up this morning.
Copy !req
972. That class of missile receives
on a wavelength of 164.1.
Copy !req
973. 164.1.
Copy !req
974. Quickly now.
Send a jamming signal.
Copy !req
975. It's starting down.
Copy !req
976. Farewell, Batman!
Copy !req
977. Farewell, Dynamic Duo!
Copy !req
978. Holy bikini!
That was close!
Copy !req
979. Yo-ho. Small craft still closing.
Copy !req
980. Range: 4,000.
Bearing: 8-8.
Copy !req
981. Faugh! They know
how to jam our missiles!
Copy !req
982. Up to periscope depth!
Copy !req
983. Yo-ho! Up to periscope depth!
Copy !req
984. - Range: 3,500.
- Get the bat charge launcher.
Copy !req
985. Roger.
Copy !req
986. They hold nine of the world's
most eminent men in dehydrated condition.
Copy !req
987. Our task is not to sink that sub,
merely to drive it to the surface.
Copy !req
988. Forward torpedo tubes.
Prepare to fire.
Copy !req
989. Yo-ho! Forward torpedo tubes.
Prepare to fire.
Copy !req
990. Five, four...
Copy !req
991. three, two—
Copy !req
992. Torpedoes-
fire!
Copy !req
993. Torpedoes— fire!
Copy !req
994. Torpedoes away!
Copy !req
995. - Dive, Mr. Bluebeard! Dive!
- Yo-ho, dive!
Copy !req
996. - Down periscope!
- Down periscope.
Copy !req
997. Torpedo wakes off the port bow.
Copy !req
998. Prepare to fire bat charges
in front of torpedoes when in range.
Copy !req
999. Faugh!
That's too soon!
Copy !req
1000. It must be bat charges.
Copy !req
1001. And that means there'll be more
of the dreaded things meant for us!
Copy !req
1002. You dismal bird! You and your submarine!
Where's it got us now?
Copy !req
1003. Shut up, you feline floozy!
Copy !req
1004. Mr. Bluebeard, down 30 fathoms!
Copy !req
1005. Run silent, run deep.
Copy !req
1006. They're diving. Engines
being switched to silent.
Copy !req
1007. We'll circle them
at full-thrust bat speed...
Copy !req
1008. - diminishing radius of curvature.
- Roger.
Copy !req
1009. - Mr. Quetch, what's their bearing?
- I don't know, sir.
Copy !req
1010. - What? You don't know?
- It's changing every second.
Copy !req
1011. They must be circling us.
Copy !req
1012. Fire when ready, Robin.
Copy !req
1013. I'll maintain curvature.
Copy !req
1014. Yo-ho!
Copy !req
1015. Compartments "A," "B" and "C"
taking green water, sir.
Copy !req
1016. Penguin! Penguin,
you know I can't take water!
Copy !req
1017. Oh, you cowardly kitten!
Do you want to live forever?
Copy !req
1018. This bird has flown around the bend.
Copy !req
1019. To cuckoo-land!
Copy !req
1020. Oh, Riddler, Joker, do something!
Copy !req
1021. We weren't meant for a watery grave!
Do something!
Copy !req
1022. Now hear this!
Now hear this!
Copy !req
1023. Blow all tanks!
Surface! Surface!
Copy !req
1024. All right, Robin.
Cut the bat charges.
Copy !req
1025. They've had about enough, I imagine.
Copy !req
1026. You're right.
They're surfacing fast.
Copy !req
1027. - Estimated surfacing position?
- 200 yards.
Copy !req
1028. Here they come.
Copy !req
1029. Diminishing speed.
Ready to board.
Copy !req
1030. Roger.
Copy !req
1031. Pirates, to arms!
Copy !req
1032. Prepare to repel boarders!
Copy !req
1033. Strike your colors, Penguin.
Copy !req
1034. Faugh! We have not yet
begun to fight! Attack!
Copy !req
1035. Bon voyage, pussy.
Copy !req
1036. Holy heartbreak!
Miss Kitka!
Copy !req
1037. Batman, I—
Copy !req
1038. Say no more, Robin.
It could be... compromising.
Copy !req
1039. Of course.
Copy !req
1040. It's just...
one of those things...
Copy !req
1041. in the life of every crime fighter.
Copy !req
1042. It means nothing.
Snap on the bat cuffs.
Copy !req
1043. Batman to Coast Guard.
Batman to Coast Guard.
Copy !req
1044. There is a drifting submarine
two miles east of Sandy Nose Lightship.
Copy !req
1045. It's filled with human jetsam.
Copy !req
1046. Come. Take it in tow.
Copy !req
1047. Robin, over here. Look.
Copy !req
1048. The hope of the entire world,
tottering on the brink.
Copy !req
1049. Holy almost.
Copy !req
1050. To think it might have been
shattered before our very eyes.
Copy !req
1051. - Up with you, Catwoman.
- The service on this yacht has gone to pot.
Copy !req
1052. Where's my tea? And— What the devil is this,
the captain's costume party?
Copy !req
1053. Holy jumble!
Where's the hope of the world now?
Copy !req
1054. Bat centrifuge at 32,000 RPMs.
Copy !req
1055. Increase angstrom force in vector "X."
Copy !req
1056. Vector "X" up one notch.
Copy !req
1057. - Yes, Commissioner?
- What progress, Batman? Is there hope?
Copy !req
1058. There's always hope.
You should know that, sir.
Copy !req
1059. Of course, of course. But...
do you think you and the Boy Wonder...
Copy !req
1060. can separate that mingled dust
back into its constituent members?
Copy !req
1061. With all modesty, Commissioner...
Copy !req
1062. if we can't, heaven knows who can.
Copy !req
1063. Truer words were never spoken.
Copy !req
1064. Howdy, y'all.
How are those boys doin' up there?
Copy !req
1065. Batman says there's hope, Mr. President.
What more can one ask?
Copy !req
1066. The whole free world is waitin'.
Copy !req
1067. Tell Batman I salute him
and wish him luck.
Copy !req
1068. I needn't tell you, ladies and gentlemen,
with whom I have just spoken.
Copy !req
1069. Ready for separation.
Copy !req
1070. All right then.
I'll activate the computer link...
Copy !req
1071. feed in the various
ethnic and national factors.
Copy !req
1072. - Batman, wait a minute.
- What?
Copy !req
1073. Well, with the way
the world is and all...
Copy !req
1074. don't you think maybe we ought to try
to improve those factors...
Copy !req
1075. kind of reshuffle them a little?
Copy !req
1076. No, Robin. No.
Copy !req
1077. It's not for mortals like us
to tamper with the laws of nature.
Copy !req
1078. Indeed, in this very Batcave,
you saw a ghastly example...
Copy !req
1079. of what happens
when one tries to do that.
Copy !req
1080. Gosh, yes, Batman.
When you put it that way-
Copy !req
1081. Here we go.
Copy !req
1082. Yes?
Copy !req
1083. Separation accomplished.
Ready to rehydrate.
Copy !req
1084. Separation accomplished.
Copy !req
1085. They are ready to rehydrate.
Copy !req
1086. We are ready to rehydrate.
Copy !req
1087. They are ready to rehydrate.
Copy !req
1088. A solemn moment, gentlemen.
Copy !req
1089. One of dedication
and humble supplication.
Copy !req
1090. Robin...
Copy !req
1091. prepare to rehydrate.
Copy !req
1092. Ready to rehydrate.
Copy !req
1093. Turn on the water faucet.
Copy !req
1094. Success! Success!
Copy !req
1095. They've done it!
They've done it!
Copy !req
1096. Success! Success!
We've done it! We've done it!
Copy !req
1097. Success! Success!
Copy !req
1098. What the-
Copy !req
1099. Gentlemen, in the interest of peace,
you must hear me out. You must—
Copy !req
1100. Gentlemen, gentlemen,
it is absolutely imperative...
Copy !req
1101. that we limit
our conversation to peace.
Copy !req
1102. Écoutez. Écoutez, s'il vous plaît.
Copy !req
1103. Who knows, Robin?
Copy !req
1104. This strange mixing of minds...
Copy !req
1105. may be the greatest single service
ever performed for humanity.
Copy !req
1106. Let's go.
But inconspicuously.
Copy !req
1107. Through the window.
We'll use our bat ropes.
Copy !req
1108. Our job is finished.
Copy !req