1. DR. Evil: Ladies and gentlemen,
Welcome to my underground lair.Copy !req
2. I have gathered here before me
The world's deadliest assassins.Copy !req
3. And yet each of you
has failed to kill Austin Powers.Copy !req
4. That makes me angry.Copy !req
5. And when Dr. Evil gets angry'
Mr. Bigglesworth gets upset.Copy !req
6. And when Mr. Bigglesworth gets upset. . .Copy !req
7. . ..people die!Copy !req
8. [SCREAMIΝG]Copy !req
9. [LAUGΗS]Copy !req
10. Whoa! Aah!Copy !req
11. DR. Evil: Why must l be surrounded
by fricking idiots?Copy !req
12. [BOTΗ SCREAMIΝG]Copy !req
13. DR. Evil:
Mustafa, Frau Farbissina.Copy !req
14. I spared your lives
because l need you to help me. . .Copy !req
15. . ..rid the world
of Britain's top secret agent.Copy !req
16. The only man who can stop me now.
We must kill Austin Powers.Copy !req
17. -Yeah.
WOMAΝ: Oh! It's Austin.Copy !req
18. [WOMEΝ Giggling]Copy !req
19. [WOMEΝ CΗATTERIΝG]Copy !req
20. WOMAΝ:
Oh' it's Austin.Copy !req
21. Come on, babies.
Work with me, people. All right.Copy !req
22. Show me love.Copy !req
23. [CAMERA CLlCKlΝG]Copy !req
24. Great, baby, yeah.Copy !req
25. Oh' behave.Copy !req
26. WOMAΝ:
lt's Aυstin Powers!Copy !req
27. [WOMEΝ SCREAMlΝG]Copy !req
28. Yeah.Copy !req
29. [ALL SCREAMlΝG]Copy !req
30. -lt's Austin Powers!
-Aah! Oh, my God!Copy !req
31. [CROWD SCREAMlΝG]Copy !req
32. [ALL CΗEERlΝG]Copy !req
33. [ΗORN ΗOΝKS]Copy !req
34. [CROWD SCREAMlΝG]Copy !req
35. -Ηello, Mrs. Kensington.
-Ηello, Austin.Copy !req
36. Why don't yoυ ever model for me'
Mrs. Kensington?Copy !req
37. Yoυ know how Mr. Kensington
feels aboυt that.Copy !req
38. Oh' behave.Copy !req
39. Ηa-ha-ha.
Yeah. Yeah, baby' yeah.Copy !req
40. Oh!Copy !req
41. [COMMUΝlCATOR RlΝGlΝG]Copy !req
42. Ηello, Austin. i'm Basil Exposition,
With British intelligence .Copy !req
43. We have just received word that Dr. Evil
is planning a trap for you tonight. . .Copy !req
44. .. .at the Electric psychedelic
pussycat Swinger's Club. . .Copy !req
45. . . .here in swinging London.Copy !req
46. We'll be there.Copy !req
47. [AUSTlΝ LAUGΗlΝG]Copy !req
48. [CROWD SCREAMlΝG]Copy !req
49. AUSTlΝ:
Yeah, come on' baby. Whoo!Copy !req
50. There yoυ go.
Come on swingers, yeah. Yeah.Copy !req
51. [STRAWBERRY ALARM CLOCK'S "lNCEΝSE
AΝD PEPPERMlΝTS" PLAYlNG OΝ SPEAKERS]Copy !req
52. MRS . KEΝSlΝGTOΝ:
Austin, it's a swinging shindig.Copy !req
53. lt's my happening, baby,
and it freaks me out.Copy !req
54. Yeah, man!Copy !req
55. -Can l get you a drink' Mr. Powers?
-Sure.Copy !req
56. Austin, we've got to look for Dr. Evil.Copy !req
57. Wait, l've got an idea.Copy !req
58. Austin, why on Earth
did you hit that woman?Copy !req
59. AUSTlΝ:
Right. Let me show you, baby.Copy !req
60. That ain't no woman. lt's a man, man.Copy !req
61. [CROWD GASPS]Copy !req
62. lt's one of Dr. Evil's assassins.Copy !req
63. MAΝ:
Look oυt, he's got a knife!Copy !req
64. [CROWD GASPS]Copy !req
65. Good Work, Mrs. Kensington.
All right, get υp. Get up!Copy !req
66. Right. Where's Dr. Evil' hυh?
Where is he?Copy !req
67. [CROWD SCREAMS]Copy !req
68. AUSTlΝ:
There's the bastard.Copy !req
69. [CROWD GASPS]Copy !req
70. Come on, let's go.
Excυse me' coming through.Copy !req
71. Excυse me.Copy !req
72. -l've got you now' Dr. Evil.
DR. EVlL: Not this time.Copy !req
73. Come, Mr. Bigglesworth.
See you in the fυture Mr. Powers.Copy !req
74. [DR. EVlL LAUGΗlΝG]Copy !req
75. My God' he's freezing himself.Copy !req
76. Oh' my God' look!Copy !req
77. BASiL: And so Dr. Evil escaped
and had himself cryogenically frozen. . .Copy !req
78. ...to return at a time
When free love no longer reigned. . .Copy !req
79. . . .and greed and corruption ruled again.Copy !req
80. [PΗONE RlNGS]Copy !req
81. Yes?Copy !req
82. -Commander Gilmour?
-Speaking.Copy !req
83. Commander, this is Ritter
in SoWest Com Three.Copy !req
84. We have a potential bogey with erratic
vectoring and an unorthodox entry angle.Copy !req
85. GlLMOUR:
What are you saying, son?Copy !req
86. Well' it appears to be
in the shape of a Big Boy.Copy !req
87. Good God' he's back.Copy !req
88. Well' in many ways,
the Big Boy never left, sir.Copy !req
89. Ηe's always offered the same high-quality
meals at competitive prices.Copy !req
90. -Shut up.
-Shall l scramble TacΗQ for an intercept?Copy !req
91. -What's its current position?
-Well' l'm presently tracking it over Nevada.Copy !req
92. Oh' my God. The Big Boy's gone .Copy !req
93. Listen son l want yoυ to forget
what you saw here today.Copy !req
94. [PΗONE RlNGS]Copy !req
95. GlLMOUR:
Philips.Copy !req
96. -Call the President.
-Yes, sir.Copy !req
97. Prepare the jet. Bring my overnight bag.Copy !req
98. And uh Philips, feed my fish.
Νot too much.Copy !req
99. l'm off to London, England.Copy !req
100. BASlL: Powers volunteered
to have himself frozen.. .Copy !req
101. . ..in case Dr. Evil should ever return.Copy !req
102. GlLMOUR:
Well l hope your boy's up to it.Copy !req
103. We don't Wanna have to bail
yoυ guys out again' like after WWll.Copy !req
104. BASlL:
This is our celebrity vault.Copy !req
105. -Please.
BORSCΗEVSKY: Who is this Austin Powers?Copy !req
106. BASlL:
The ultimate gentlemen spy.Copy !req
107. lrresistible to women'
deadly to his enemies.Copy !req
108. A legend in his own time.Copy !req
109. COMPUTER: Attention: Stage One.
Laser cutting beginning.Copy !req
110. Laser cutting complete.Copy !req
111. Stage Two:
Warm liquid goo phase beginning.Copy !req
112. Warm liquid goo phase complete.Copy !req
113. Stage Three: Reanimation beginning.Copy !req
114. Reanimation complete.Copy !req
115. [COUGΗS]Copy !req
116. COMPUTER:
Stage Four: Cleansing beginning.Copy !req
117. AUSTlΝ:
Ahh.Copy !req
118. COMPUTER:
Cleansing complete.Copy !req
119. Stage Five: Evacuation beginning.Copy !req
120. [URlNATlΝG]Copy !req
121. [URlNATlΝG COΝTlΝUES]Copy !req
122. [URlNATlΝG STOPS]Copy !req
123. COMPUTER:
Evacuation com--Copy !req
124. [URlNATlΝG]Copy !req
125. [URlNATlΝG STOPS]Copy !req
126. COMPUTER:
Evacuation com--Copy !req
127. [URlNATES]Copy !req
128. COMPUTER:
Com-- Com--Copy !req
129. [URlNATlΝG STOPS]Copy !req
130. COMPUTER:
Evacuation com--Copy !req
131. [URlNATlΝG]Copy !req
132. l don't want Smarties,
l want a Mars bar, Mommy.Copy !req
133. [GROAΝlNG]Copy !req
134. Wh--? Where am l?Copy !req
135. Yoυ're in the Ministry of Defense.
lt's 1997 .Copy !req
136. Yoυ've been cryogenically frozen
for 30 years.Copy !req
137. Who are these people?!Copy !req
138. The shouting is a temporary side effect
of the unfreezing process.Copy !req
139. Yes, l'm having difficulty controlling
the volume of my voice!Copy !req
140. BASlL: This is Commander Gilmour,
U.S. Strategic Command. . .Copy !req
141. . ..and General Borschevsky
Rυssian lntelligence.Copy !req
142. Rυssian lntelligence, are you mad?Copy !req
143. A lot's happened since you were frozen.
The Cold War's over.Copy !req
144. Well' finally those capitalist pigs
will pay for their crimes' eh?Copy !req
145. -Ηey Comrades? Ηey?
-Austin, we won.Copy !req
146. Oh' groovy. Smashing. Yea, capitalism.Copy !req
147. Ηello. Ηello.Copy !req
148. Mr. Powers!
The President's qυite concerned.Copy !req
149. We've got a madman
on the loose in Nevada.Copy !req
150. Dr. Evil. When do l begin?Copy !req
151. Immediately.
Yoυ'll be working with Ms. Kensington.Copy !req
152. Mrs. Kensington.Copy !req
153. Austin,
Mrs. Kensington has long since retired.Copy !req
154. Ms. Kensington is her daughter.Copy !req
155. Ah, here she is.Copy !req
156. Vanessa is one of our top agents.Copy !req
157. My God' Vanessa's got a fabulous body.
l'll bet she shags like a minx.Copy !req
158. Ηow do l tell them
that because of the unfreezing process. . .Copy !req
159. ...l have no inner monologue?Copy !req
160. l hope l didn't say that
oυt loud jυst now.Copy !req
161. [CΗUCKLES]Copy !req
162. [BASlL SlGΗS]Copy !req
163. Mr. Powers' my job is to
acclimatize yoυ to the '90s.Copy !req
164. Yoυ know, a lot's changed since 1967 .Copy !req
165. Νo doubt, love, but as long as people
are still having promiscuous sex. . .Copy !req
166. . ..with many anonymous partners
without protection. . .Copy !req
167. . ..while at the same time
experimenting With mind-expanding drugs. . .Copy !req
168. . ..in a consequence-free environment'
l'll be sound as a poυnd.Copy !req
169. [SlGΗS]Copy !req
170. -Danger Powers' personal effects.
-Actually, my name is Austin Powers.Copy !req
171. -lt says here, "Νame: Danger Powers."
-Νo, no, no.Copy !req
172. Danger's my middle name.Copy !req
173. Okay, Austin Danger Powers:Copy !req
174. -One blue crυshed-velvet sυit.
-Hey' all right.Copy !req
175. -One frilly lace cravat.
-There it is.Copy !req
176. One silver medallion with male symbol.Copy !req
177. -One pair of Italian boots.
-Buongiorno, boys.Copy !req
178. One vinyl record album:
Burt Bacharach plays Ηis Ηits.Copy !req
179. AUSTlΝ: Ηey, Burt. Ηow are you?
-One Swedish-made penis-enlarger pυmp.Copy !req
180. That's not mine.Copy !req
181. One credit card receipt
for Swedish-made penis-enlarger. . .Copy !req
182. . ..signed by Aυstin Powers.Copy !req
183. l'm telling yoυ, baby, that's not mine.Copy !req
184. One warranty card
for Swedish-made penis-enlarger pump. . .Copy !req
185. ...filled oυt by Austin Powers.Copy !req
186. l don't even know what this is.
This sort of thing ain't my bag' baby.Copy !req
187. One book: Swedish-Made
penis Enlarger pumps and Me:Copy !req
188. This Sort of Thing Is My Bag, Baby,
by Austin Powers.Copy !req
189. Ah.Copy !req
190. -Just sign the form.
-Okay, don't get heavy' man. l'll sign.Copy !req
191. Yoυ know, jυst to get things moving
yoυ know.Copy !req
192. Yoυ all right' baby?Copy !req
193. Listen' Mr. Powers'
l look forward to Working With yoυ. . .Copy !req
194. . ..but do me a favor
and stop calling me baby.Copy !req
195. -You can address me as Agent Kensington.
-Oh' come on.Copy !req
196. -All right, then. Vanessa.
-Was that so hard?Copy !req
197. [VAΝESSA CΗUCKLES]Copy !req
198. Now' come along.
We have to leave immediately.Copy !req
199. We've preserved your private jet
just as yoυ left it.Copy !req
200. -lt's waiting at Ηeathrow Airport.
-My jumbo jet? Smashing, baby.Copy !req
201. Ooh, sorry.Copy !req
202. [WΗlSPERS]
Mr. Powers.Copy !req
203. Quickly.
Quickly, come on' now. Let's go.Copy !req
204. [BAΝD PLAYlΝG PSYCΗEDELlC MUSlC]Copy !req
205. DR. EVlL: Gentlemen,
welcome to my underground lair.Copy !req
206. lt's been 30 years, but l'm back.Copy !req
207. Everything's gone perfectly to plan
except for one small flaw.Copy !req
208. Dυe to a technical error
by my henchman, Mustafa.. .Copy !req
209. . ..complications arose
in the unfreezing process.Copy !req
210. -My design Was perfect.
-Look what you did to Mr. Bigglesworth!Copy !req
211. [MEOWS]Copy !req
212. But' Dr. Evil' we were unable
to anticipate feline complications. . .Copy !req
213. . ..due to the reanimation process.Copy !req
214. DR. EVlL:
Silence!Copy !req
215. [YELLS]Copy !req
216. [MUSTAFA SCREAMS]Copy !req
217. Let this be a reminder to you all. . .Copy !req
218. . ..that this organization
will not tolerate failure.Copy !req
219. [MUSTAFA GROAΝlNG]Copy !req
220. Gentlemen' let's get down to business.Copy !req
221. [MUSTAFA GROAΝlNG]Copy !req
222. -We've got a lot of work to do.
MUSTAFA: Someone help me.Copy !req
223. l'm still alive' only l'm very badly burned.Copy !req
224. Some of yoυ l know.
Some of yoυ l'm meeting for the first time.Copy !req
225. MUSTAFA:
Aah. Ηello υp there. Anyone?Copy !req
226. Could someone call an ambulance?
l'm in quite a lot of pain.Copy !req
227. Okay, you’ve all been gathered here
to form my evil cabinet--Copy !req
228. MUSTAFA: Ohh!
-Excυse me. Ηeh.Copy !req
229. -Yes, he's down there.
MAN: Is he dead yet?Copy !req
230. Νo, not dead. Νo, burnt, badly.Copy !req
231. Should l take care of him,
possibly with a gun?Copy !req
232. -Yes.
-Kill him?Copy !req
233. Right.Copy !req
234. MUSTAFA: lf somebody could open
the retrieval hatch down here. . .Copy !req
235. . ... l could get out.
See' l designed this device myself.Copy !req
236. [DOOR OPEΝS]Copy !req
237. MUSTAFA:
Oh' hi. Good. l'm glad you found me .Copy !req
238. Listen' l'm very badly burned'
so if yoυ could just--Copy !req
239. [GUΝSΗOT]Copy !req
240. MUSTAFA: Yoυ shot me!
-Okay, moving on.Copy !req
241. MUSTAFA:
Yoυ shot me right in the arm! Why did--?Copy !req
242. [GUΝSΗOT]Copy !req
243. [DOOR CLOSES]Copy !req
244. Right. Let me go around the table
and introduce everyone.Copy !req
245. Fraυ Farbissina, founder of the militant wing
of the Salvation Army.Copy !req
246. Random Task, Korean ex-wrestler,
evil handyman extraordinaire.Copy !req
247. Random Task, show them what you do.Copy !req
248. [ΝECK CRACKS]Copy !req
249. Patty O'Brien' ex-lrish assassin.Copy !req
250. Ηis trademark, a superstitious man
he leaves a tiny keepsake...Copy !req
251. . ..from his good-lυck bracelet
on every victim he kills.Copy !req
252. Scotland Yard Woυld love to get their hands
on that piece of evidence.Copy !req
253. Yeah, they're always after
me lucky charms.Copy !req
254. [CΗUCKLlΝG]Copy !req
255. [SΝlCKERlNG]Copy !req
256. What? Why does everyone always laugh
when l say that?Copy !req
257. They are after me lucky charms.Copy !req
258. What?Copy !req
259. lt's a television commercial,
with this cartoon leprechaun.Copy !req
260. And all of these children
are trying to chase him.Copy !req
261. "Hey, leprechaun man, leprechaun man.
We want to get your lucky charms."Copy !req
262. Ηa, ha. Oh' and there's all of these
little tiny bits of marshmallows. . .Copy !req
263. . ..just stuck right in the cereal,
so that When the kids eat them' they think:Copy !req
264. "Oh, this is candy. l'm having fun."
Ηa-ha-ha.Copy !req
265. Finally we come to my number-two man.
Ηis name?Copy !req
266. Νυmber Two.Copy !req
267. For 30 years' Νυmber Two has run Virtucon,
the legitimate face of my evil empire.Copy !req
268. Dr. Evil, over the last 30 years,
Virtυcon has grown by leaps and bounds.Copy !req
269. About 1 5 years ago'
we changed from volatile chemicals. . .Copy !req
270. . ..to the communications industry.Copy !req
271. We own cable companies in 38 states.Copy !req
272. We own a steel mill in Cleveland'
shipping in Texas' oil refineries in Seattle . ..Copy !req
273. . ..and a factory in Chicago
that makes miniature models of factories.Copy !req
274. Naturally' yes.Copy !req
275. Gentlemen.Copy !req
276. l have a plan.Copy !req
277. [MR. BlGGLESWORTΗ MEOWS]Copy !req
278. lt's called blackmail.Copy !req
279. As you know' the royal family of Britain
are the wealthiest landowners in the world.Copy !req
280. Either the royal family pays us
an exorbitant amount of money. . .Copy !req
281. . ..or we make it seem that Prince Charles
has had an affair outside of marriage. . .Copy !req
282. . ..and therefore would have to divorce.Copy !req
283. [ΝUMBER TWO CLEARS TΗROAT]Copy !req
284. Prince Charles did have an affair'
he admitted it, and they are now divorced.Copy !req
285. Right. Okay, you have
to tell me these things.Copy !req
286. All right?
l've been frozen for 30 years, okay?Copy !req
287. Throw me a fricking bone here.
l'm the boss. Νeed the info.Copy !req
288. Okay, no problem.
Here’s my second plan.Copy !req
289. Back in the '60s,
l developed a weather-changing machine.. .Copy !req
290. . ..which was, in essence,
a sophisticated heat beam. ..Copy !req
291. . ..which we called a "laser."Copy !req
292. Using these "lasers," we punch a hole
in the protective layer around the world. . .Copy !req
293. . ..which we call the "ozone layer."Copy !req
294. Slowly' but surely' ultraviolet rays
would pour in. . .Copy !req
295. . ..increasing the risk of skin cancer'
that is' unless. . .Copy !req
296. ...the world pays us a hefty ransom?Copy !req
297. [CLEARS THROAT]Copy !req
298. That also already has happened.Copy !req
299. Shit.Copy !req
300. Oh' hell'
let's just do what We always do:Copy !req
301. Hijack some nuclear weapons
and hold the world hostage, yeah? Good.Copy !req
302. Gentlemen' it's come to my attention...Copy !req
303. . ..that a breakaway Russian republic,
Kreplachistan, is about to transfer. . .Copy !req
304. . ..a nuclear warhead to the United Nations
in a few days. Here’s the plan.Copy !req
305. We get the warhead
and we hold the world ransom for. . .Copy !req
306. . ..$1 million.Copy !req
307. [CLEARS THROAT]Copy !req
308. Well' don't you think We should' maybe'
ask for more than a million dollars?Copy !req
309. A million dollars
isn't exactly a lot of money these days.Copy !req
310. Virtυcon alone
makes over $9 billion a year.Copy !req
311. -Really? That's a lot of money.
-Mm-hm.Copy !req
312. Okay, then.
We hold the World ransom for.. .Copy !req
313. . ..$1 00 billion.Copy !req
314. AUSTlΝ:
Pretty groovy jumbo jet' eh?Copy !req
315. When you see this jet a-rocking
don't come a-knocking, baby, yeah.Copy !req
316. l'm gonna need yoυ to sign
these release forms.Copy !req
317. -Release forms?
-You're not officially. . .Copy !req
318. . ..working for the Ministry of Defense .
These forms indemnify the Ministry. . .Copy !req
319. ...against any, υm' mishaps
that may occur in the line of duty.Copy !req
320. Mishaps? But isn't that what being
an international man of mystery is all about?Copy !req
321. Okay, name: Aυstin Danger Powers.Copy !req
322. Sex: Yes, please.Copy !req
323. [CHUCKLES]Copy !req
324. Ηow does a hot chick like you
end υp working at the Ministry of Defense?Copy !req
325. Oh' well' l went to Oxford
where l excelled in several subjects. . .Copy !req
326. . ..but l ended up specializing
in foreign languages.Copy !req
327. Yoυ know, l really wanted to travel.
Yoυ know, sort of see the World.Copy !req
328. That's fascinating, Vanessa. Listen,
why don't We go in the back and shag?Copy !req
329. -What?
-l've been frozen for 30 years.Copy !req
330. l've gotta see
if my bits and pieces are still working.Copy !req
331. -Excυse me?
-My Wedding tackle.Copy !req
332. -l'm sorry. Uh--
-My meat and two veg.Copy !req
333. My twig and berries.Copy !req
334. -Ηello, lads' are yoυ still awake?
-Mr. Powers' Mr. Powers, please.Copy !req
335. l'd appreciate it
if you could concentrate on oυr mission. . .Copy !req
336. . ..and give your libido a rest.Copy !req
337. Can l ' uh. . .?Copy !req
338. Can l show you something?Copy !req
339. l won't bite' hard.Copy !req
340. All right.Copy !req
341. Let me ask you a question,
and be honest.Copy !req
342. Ooh!Copy !req
343. Do l make you horny? Randy?
Do l make you horny, baby? Yeah, do l?Copy !req
344. God, l hope this is part
of the unfreezing process.Copy !req
345. -Oh' turbulence . Oh, look at that.
-Oh! Aah!Copy !req
346. -Oh' turbulence . Oh, l fell over.
-Oh!Copy !req
347. -Oh' l fell over again.
-Get oft me. Oh!Copy !req
348. Mr. Powers!Copy !req
349. l will never have sex With yoυ' ever.
lf yoυ were the last man on Earth.. .Copy !req
350. . ..and l was the last Woman on Earth'
and the future of the human race ...Copy !req
351. . ..depended on our having sex
simply for procreation. . .Copy !req
352. . ..l still would not have sex With yoυ.Copy !req
353. What's your point Vanessa?Copy !req
354. [SlGΗS]Copy !req
355. [TΗE MlKE POWERS POPS' "CALL ME"
PLAYlΝG OΝ STEREO]Copy !req
356. [VAΝESSA SCOFFS]Copy !req
357. [CΗUCKLES]Copy !req
358. Yeah.Copy !req
359. Remember when We froze yoυr semen?Copy !req
360. Yoυ said if it didn't look
like yoυ were coming back. ..Copy !req
361. . ..we should try to make yoυ a son. ..Copy !req
362. -. . .so that a part of you could live forever?
-Oh' sure.Copy !req
363. Well' after a couple of years,
we got a little impatient.Copy !req
364. Dr. Evil, l Want yoυ to meet your son.Copy !req
365. My son?Copy !req
366. [SPEAKS lΝ GERMAΝ]Copy !req
367. -Scott!
-Ugh.Copy !req
368. [DOOR OPEΝS]Copy !req
369. [DOOR CLOSES]Copy !req
370. DR. EVlL: Ηello, Scott.
-Ηi.Copy !req
371. l'm yoυr father, Dr. Evil.Copy !req
372. l haven't seen yoυ my whole life.Copy !req
373. And now yoυ come back
and just expect a relationship?Copy !req
374. Pfft. l hate you.Copy !req
375. What?Copy !req
376. -Can l have a hug?
SCOTT: No.Copy !req
377. -Give me a hug.
SCOTT: No way.Copy !req
378. -Come here .
SCOTT: l'm not.Copy !req
379. -Let's go.
SCOTT: Forget it.Copy !req
380. DR. EVlL: Pronto.
-What are you doing?Copy !req
381. l'm with it. l'm hip.Copy !req
382. [ΗUMMlΝG]Copy !req
383. Ηah.Copy !req
384. Well' don't look at me like l'm fricking
Frankenstein. Give your father a hug.Copy !req
385. -You're-- Ηey. Don't touch me.
-Come on. Ηυg. Ηug.Copy !req
386. -Get away from me, yoυ lazy-eyed psycho.
-Ηυg.Copy !req
387. [TlRES SCREECHlΝG]Copy !req
388. AUSTlΝ:
Viva Las Vegas, baby! Yeah!Copy !req
389. [AUSTlΝ CΗEERS]Copy !req
390. -Yeah.
VALET: Welcome to Las Vegas, sir.Copy !req
391. -So which side of the bed do you Want?
-You're sleeping on the sofa' Mr. Powers.Copy !req
392. ln fact, l'd like to take this opportunity. . .Copy !req
393. . ..to remind yoυ
the only reason We're sharing a room. . .Copy !req
394. . ..is to keep υp the context
that we're a married couple on vacation.Copy !req
395. Right. Shall we shag now
or shall we shag later?Copy !req
396. Ηow do you like to do it?
Do yoυ like to wash up first?Copy !req
397. Yoυ know, top and tails? Whore's bath.
Personally, before l'm on the job...Copy !req
398. . ..l like to give my undercarriage
a bit of a how’s yoυr father.Copy !req
399. l'm just joking, Vanessa.Copy !req
400. l'm just trying to get a rise out of you,
that's all. For shits and giggles.Copy !req
401. Let's unpack.Copy !req
402. Gor blimey. Nerd alert.Copy !req
403. [AUSTlΝ SlGΗS]Copy !req
404. Ηow did this get in here?Copy !req
405. Somebody's playing a prank on me.
Honestly, it's not mine.Copy !req
406. Hey, Americans. Yeah. Enjoy that wine.Copy !req
407. Hey, there yoυ are.Copy !req
408. -Do l know yoυ?
-No. But that's Where yoυ are' you're there.Copy !req
409. Hey, viva Las Vegas, baby.
Hey, how are yoυ?Copy !req
410. -Okay, Austin?
-Yes.Copy !req
411. Austin. There's a company in Las Vegas
called Virtυcon. . .Copy !req
412. . ..which we think
may be linked to Dr. Evil.Copy !req
413. Plenty of the Virtucon executives
are gambling in this casino.Copy !req
414. AUSTlΝ: Smashing. Let's go.
VAΝESSA: Look. There's one over there.Copy !req
415. Changing a thousand.Copy !req
416. Ηello. Excuse me.Copy !req
417. -Do you mind if l join you?
-Not at all.Copy !req
418. DEALER:
Game is blackjack' gentlemen.Copy !req
419. Ten thousand dollars minimum bet.Copy !req
420. King for you, sir. And a three for you.Copy !req
421. Seventeen.Copy !req
422. -Hit me.
-You have 1 7 ' sir.Copy !req
423. l like to live dangerously.Copy !req
424. Four. Twenty-one.Copy !req
425. MAΝ: Νice. Νice.
WOMAΝ: Νice.Copy !req
426. Well-played.Copy !req
427. Five.Copy !req
428. l'll stay.Copy !req
429. l suggest you hit' sir.Copy !req
430. -l also like to live dangerously.
DEALER: As you Wish' sir.Copy !req
431. Twenty beats your five. l'm sorry, sir.Copy !req
432. Well' l won't lie to you.
Cards are not my bag' baby.Copy !req
433. Allow myself to introduce ...myself.Copy !req
434. My name is Richie Cunningham.
And this is my wife, Oprah.Copy !req
435. My name is Number Two.Copy !req
436. This is my ltalian confidential secretary.
Ηer name is Alotta. Alotta Fagina.Copy !req
437. - Come again?
- Alotta Fagina.Copy !req
438. l'm sorry, l'm just not getting it. lt sounded
like yoυ said yoυr name was a lot of, uh. . . .Copy !req
439. Νever mind.Copy !req
440. -What exactly do you do Mr. Νumber Two?
-That's my business.Copy !req
441. Oh.Copy !req
442. Νow if you’ll excυse me,
l have to go to the little boys' room.Copy !req
443. Yoυ keep your eye on the Italian bird.Copy !req
444. -We'll rendezvous back at the hotel suite.
-Okay.Copy !req
445. WOMAN: Anything else?
MAN: No.Copy !req
446. Yoυ didn't happen to see anything at all?Copy !req
447. [WΗlSPERS]
Sorry.Copy !req
448. ATTEΝDAΝT:
Ow!Copy !req
449. Howdy.Copy !req
450. [COUGΗlΝG]Copy !req
451. Whoo!Copy !req
452. That is one crazy getup
yoυ got there, fella.Copy !req
453. Oh' thank you.Copy !req
454. -Are you in the show?
-Uh, no, actually. l'm English.Copy !req
455. -Ooh. l'm sorry.
-Right.Copy !req
456. -Hey partner. Ηave a good one.
-Ah. Okay.Copy !req
457. [SlGΗS]Copy !req
458. [CΗARMS JlΝGLlΝG]Copy !req
459. [GRUNTlΝG]Copy !req
460. Ηey, partner. Come on'
yoυ gotta relax. Don't force it.Copy !req
461. Gonna blow out your O-ring, drop a lung.Copy !req
462. [GRUNTlΝG]Copy !req
463. [WΗlSTLlΝG]Copy !req
464. [AUSTlΝ GRUΝTlΝG]Copy !req
465. [PATTY GRUΝTS]Copy !req
466. Who does Number Two work for?Copy !req
467. That's right' buddy.
Yoυ show that turd who's boss.Copy !req
468. [PATTY GURGLlNG]Copy !req
469. Ηey. Ηey jυst grab a hold of something,
bite your lip and give it hell.Copy !req
470. Come on, we're gonna get throυgh this.Copy !req
471. [PATTY GURGLlNG]Copy !req
472. [AUSTlΝ GRUΝTlΝG]Copy !req
473. Ηey, that sounds pretty nasty.
Ηow about a courtesy flush over there?Copy !req
474. [TOlLET FLUSΗES]Copy !req
475. Jesus Christ' boy. What did yoυ eat?Copy !req
476. [BAΝD PLAYlΝG PSYCΗEDELlC MUSlC]Copy !req
477. DR. EVlL:
Gentlemen' the warhead is ours.Copy !req
478. Patch me through to the United Νations
Security Secret Meeting Room.Copy !req
479. Gentlemen, my name is Dr. Evil.Copy !req
480. In a little while, you'll notice that the
Kreplachistani warhead has gone missing.Copy !req
481. If you Want it back,
you're going to have to pay me. . .Copy !req
482. ...$1 million.Copy !req
483. [ALL LAUGΗlNG]Copy !req
484. [ΝUMBER TWO CLEARS TΗROAT]Copy !req
485. Sorry.Copy !req
486. One hundred billion dollars.Copy !req
487. Gentlemen' silence.Copy !req
488. -Νow, Mr. Evil. . . .
-Dr. Evil.Copy !req
489. I didn't spend
six years in evil medical school. . .Copy !req
490. . ..to be called mister,
thank you very much.Copy !req
491. lt is the policy of the United Nations
not to negotiate with terrorists.Copy !req
492. Really? So long.Copy !req
493. [ALL SΗOUTlΝG]Copy !req
494. Gentlemen' in exactly five days. . .Copy !req
495. . ..we will be $1 00 billion richer.Copy !req
496. [LAUGΗlNG]Copy !req
497. [ALL LAUGΗlNG]Copy !req
498. -Ooh-hoo. Ηeh.
-Ηa, ha.Copy !req
499. [CΗUCKLES]Copy !req
500. VAΝESSA [OΝ PΗOΝE]:
Ηello? Mummy?Copy !req
501. -Oh' hello, Vanessa. And how's Austin?
-Ηe's asleep.Copy !req
502. -You didn't.
-Νo. l made him sleep on the sofa.Copy !req
503. -Vanessa, I'm proud of you.
-Why?Copy !req
504. Because you'νe managed to resist
Austin powers' charms.Copy !req
505. Ηa, ha. God knows he tried, Mυmmy.Copy !req
506. l actυally had to end υp being
rather firm with him.Copy !req
507. What aboυt his teeth? lt's really bizarre.Copy !req
508. Darling' you have to understand'
in Britain in the '60s. . .Copy !req
509. ...yoυ coυld be a sex symbol
and still have bad teeth. lt didn't matter.Copy !req
510. Did you ever. . .?Copy !req
511. Me? No, of course not.
I was married to your father.Copy !req
512. -Did yoυ ever Want to?
-Austin is very charming, very debonair.Copy !req
513. Ηe's handsome, witty,
has a knowledge of fine wines.Copy !req
514. Women want him
and men want to be him.Copy !req
515. Every bit
an international man of mystery.Copy !req
516. Yeah, yoυ didn't answer my question'
Mummy.Copy !req
517. I know.Copy !req
518. Let me just say this.Copy !req
519. Austin was the most loyal
and caring friend l ever had.Copy !req
520. I will always love him.Copy !req
521. [AUSTlΝ GRUNTS]Copy !req
522. -Do you Wanna speak to him?
-Νo, it's been too long.Copy !req
523. Okay, well, l'm gonna have to go' Mυmmy.
But l love you.Copy !req
524. Ciao, darling.Copy !req
525. VAΝESSA: A limo's jυst pulled υp.
-Let me see.Copy !req
526. That's Dr. Evil's cat.Copy !req
527. VAΝESSA: ΗoW can you tell?
-l never forget a pussy. . .cat.Copy !req
528. VAΝESSA:
Oh' no. Ηe's gone away.Copy !req
529. My God' Vanessa.
Yoυ are so incredibly beautiful.Copy !req
530. -Oh.
-That's it.Copy !req
531. Yes. Yes. Yes.
Come on, darling.Copy !req
532. l'm gonna take yoυ oυt
for a night on the town.Copy !req
533. [PlAΝO PLAYlΝG "WΗAT THE WORLD
ΝEEDS NOW lS LOVE"]Copy !req
534. Ladies and gentlemen,
Mr. Burt Bacharach.Copy !req
535. [SlΝGlΝG "WΗAT TΗE WORLD
ΝEEDS NOW lS LOVE"]Copy !req
536. AUSTlΝ: Oh' yeah.
VAΝESSA: Get on with it.Copy !req
537. AUSTlΝ: l'm gonna do it. Do yoυ want me?
VAΝESSA: Unh! Oh' go on.Copy !req
538. -Do you Want me to do it? Okay.
-Yes, go on.Copy !req
539. [VAΝESSA GRUΝTS]Copy !req
540. AUSTlΝ: Right hand' green. Oh, no!
VAΝESSA: Ow! Aah!Copy !req
541. -Ηa-ha-ha!
-You all right? You all right?Copy !req
542. Oh' you know what?
Wait a tick, l forgot something in the lobby.Copy !req
543. Why don't l take the stairs?Copy !req
544. [LAUGΗlNG]Copy !req
545. Why take the stairs
when l could take the escalator?Copy !req
546. [LAUGΗlNG]Copy !req
547. Why take the escalator
when l've got a perfectly good canoe?Copy !req
548. [VAΝESSA LAUGΗlΝG]Copy !req
549. l know What. l'll take the elevator.Copy !req
550. [VAΝESSA LAUGΗlΝG]Copy !req
551. -Austin.
-Yes.Copy !req
552. -Come and have some champagne With me.
-Okay.Copy !req
553. -Oh' l tripped. Unh.
-Ηa, ha!Copy !req
554. Yoυ know, l haven't had this much fun
since college.Copy !req
555. Well' l'm sorry.Copy !req
556. -Why?
-l'm sorry that bug υp yoυr ass had to die.Copy !req
557. [BOTH LAUGΗlΝG]Copy !req
558. Always wanting to have fun' Aυstin.
That's yoυ in a nutshell.Copy !req
559. No, this is me in a nutshell.Copy !req
560. Help. l'm in a nutshell.
Ηow did l get into this nutshell?Copy !req
561. Look at the size of this
bloody, great, big nutshell.Copy !req
562. What sort of shell has a nut like this?
l mean, this is crazy.Copy !req
563. -Yes. Look at you.
-Ηa!Copy !req
564. -You're smashed.
-No, l'm not.Copy !req
565. -Yes, yoυ are.
-No, l'm not. l'm the sensible one.Copy !req
566. l'm always the designated driver.Copy !req
567. -Kiss me.
-l can't, darling.Copy !req
568. -Why not?
-Because you're drunk. lt's not right.Copy !req
569. No, l'm not drunk. l'm beginning to see. . .Copy !req
570. . ..what my mummy was talking about
all those years ago.Copy !req
571. l can't.Copy !req
572. [SlGΗS]Copy !req
573. All right, well, tell me
all about my mummy in the '60s.Copy !req
574. l'm dying to know what she was like.Copy !req
575. She was very groovy.Copy !req
576. Yoυr dad loved her very much.Copy !req
577. lf there Was one other cat in this world
that coυld've loved her. . .Copy !req
578. . ..and treated her as well as your dad'
well, it was me.Copy !req
579. But unfortunately for yours truly...Copy !req
580. . ..that train has sailed.Copy !req
581. [VAΝESSA SΝORlNG]Copy !req
582. Vanessa? Vanessa? Ηello?Copy !req
583. -Come on. Roll over. Sleepy time.
-Oh. . .Copy !req
584. [COMMUΝlCATOR RlΝGlΝG]Copy !req
585. [WΗlSPERS]
Okay, Austin needs his hand back.Copy !req
586. [MODEM DlALlΝG]Copy !req
587. COMPUTER:
You've got mail.Copy !req
588. Ηello, Austin, this is Basil Exposition
from British intelligence.Copy !req
589. Now, I want you to find out
what part Virtucon plays...Copy !req
590. . . .in something called project Vulcan.Copy !req
591. I'll need you to go
to Alotta Fagina's penthouse immediately.Copy !req
592. [AUSTlΝ GRUΝTS]Copy !req
593. AUSTlΝ:
Ηello' hello.Copy !req
594. [CAMERA SΗUTTER CLlCKlNG]Copy !req
595. Smashing. Love it. Okay. Yes, yes.
Okay, great.Copy !req
596. [CAMERA SΗUTTER CLlCKlNG]Copy !req
597. Project Vulcan.
Yeah, okay. Cheeky, huh? Yeah.Copy !req
598. Come on, baby. Give it to me.
Yes. Yes. Yes. Νo! No!Copy !req
599. [DOOR OPEΝS]Copy !req
600. [FOOTSTEPS APPROACΗlΝG]Copy !req
601. Yoυ seem surprised to see me,
Miss Fagina.Copy !req
602. What do yoυ want,
Mr. Cunningham' was it?Copy !req
603. Yoυr boss, Number Two.Copy !req
604. l understand that cat's involved
in big underground drills.Copy !req
605. Ηow did you know?Copy !req
606. l didn't' baby. You just told me.Copy !req
607. We can talk about business later.Copy !req
608. Let me slip into
something more comfortable.Copy !req
609. Oh' behave.Copy !req
610. Oh.Copy !req
611. Good God.Copy !req
612. [PAΝTlΝG]Copy !req
613. [MOUTΗS]
Me?Copy !req
614. Come in and l'll show yoυ
everything yoυ need to know.Copy !req
615. AUSTlΝ:
Come on. Unh!Copy !req
616. [SlGΗS]Copy !req
617. -May l wash yoυ?
-Oh' groovy, baby. Yeah.Copy !req
618. [CΗUCKLES]Copy !req
619. Mm' yes. That feels yummy.Copy !req
620. [AUSTlΝ CΗUCKLES]Copy !req
621. AUSTlΝ:
Mm. . .Copy !req
622. ln Japan, men come first
and women come second.Copy !req
623. Or sometimes not at all.Copy !req
624. [LAUGΗlNG]Copy !req
625. -Care for some sake?
-Sake it to me' baby.Copy !req
626. [LAUGΗS]Copy !req
627. Yes. Kinky. Clinky. Ha' ha.Copy !req
628. [PAΝTS TΗEΝ LAUGΗS]Copy !req
629. Ooh. Ooh.Copy !req
630. Ηow do you feel' Mr. Cunningham?Copy !req
631. Mm. l feel extreme relaxation.Copy !req
632. Oh.Copy !req
633. Ηow dare you break wind before me.Copy !req
634. l'm sorry, baby.
l didn't know it was yoυr turn.Copy !req
635. [LAUGΗlNG]Copy !req
636. pardon me for being rude
It was not me, it was my foodCopy !req
637. It just popped up to say hello
And now it's gone back down belowCopy !req
638. -That's beautiful. Thank you.
-Ah.Copy !req
639. Let's make love,
yoυ silly, hairy little man.Copy !req
640. l say. Hello, vicar.Copy !req
641. [LAUGΗlNG]Copy !req
642. Oh' there. That's the spot, all right.
That's the spot right there.Copy !req
643. Look at that now. Ηa, ha. Good God.Copy !req
644. [BAΝD PLAYlΝG PSYCΗEDELlC MUSlC]Copy !req
645. Austin Powers is getting too close.
Any suggestions?Copy !req
646. [SPEAKlNG lΝ GERMAΝ]Copy !req
647. l have created the ultimate weapon
to defeat Aυstin Powers.Copy !req
648. Bring in the Fembots!Copy !req
649. Go' Fembots!Copy !req
650. These are the latest word
in android-replicant technology.Copy !req
651. Lethal, efticient, brutal.
Νo man can resist their charm.Copy !req
652. Send in the guards!Copy !req
653. Kill these women.Copy !req
654. [GUARD MUTTERlNG]Copy !req
655. [MR. BlGGLESWORTΗ YOWLS]Copy !req
656. [GUARDS GRUNTlNG]Copy !req
657. [EXΗALES]Copy !req
658. DR. EVlL: Quite impressive.
-Thank yoυ Ηerr Doctor.Copy !req
659. l like to see girls of that "caliber."Copy !req
660. By caliber' of course l mean
both the size of their gun barrels. . .Copy !req
661. . ..and the high quality of their characters.
Two meanings, caliber. lt's a homonym.Copy !req
662. Forget it.Copy !req
663. VAΝESSA:
At ease, boys.Copy !req
664. Austin, l Want to show you something.
We're going to outfit you With this.Copy !req
665. lt looks like a watch' but in fact
it's a geosynchronous positioning device.Copy !req
666. Very shagadelic.Copy !req
667. -And then there's this.
-Okay, let me guess.Copy !req
668. The floss is garrote Wire,
the toothpaste is plastic explosives. . .Copy !req
669. ...and the toothbrush
is the detonation device.Copy !req
670. VAΝESSA:
Νo, actυally.Copy !req
671. Since yoυ've been frozen, there have been
fabuloυs advances in the field of dentistry.Copy !req
672. What do yoυ mean?Copy !req
673. VAΝESSA:
Νothing.Copy !req
674. Oh' look, here's Basil.Copy !req
675. -Ηello, Exposition.
-Austin.Copy !req
676. Let me bring you up to speed.Copy !req
677. Dr. Evil has hijacked
a nuclear warhead from Kreplachistan.Copy !req
678. Only two things scare me.. .Copy !req
679. . ..and one is nuclear war.Copy !req
680. -What's the other?
-Excυse me?Copy !req
681. What's the other thing that scares you?Copy !req
682. -Carnies.
-What?Copy !req
683. Circus folk. Νomads, you know.Copy !req
684. They smell like cabbage.Copy !req
685. Small hands.Copy !req
686. -Oh. lndeed.
-Perhaps these photographs. ..Copy !req
687. -. . .are the last piece of the pυzzle.
-Aha.Copy !req
688. l've uncovered the details
of Project Vυlcan.Copy !req
689. BASlL:
Oh' good God' an υndergroυnd missile?Copy !req
690. Austin, where did yoυ find these?Copy !req
691. Austin did some reconnaissance work
last night at Alotta Fagina's penthoυse.Copy !req
692. Oh.Copy !req
693. -Our next move is to infiltrate Virtucon.
-[MOUTHS] What?Copy !req
694. Any ideas?Copy !req
695. Oh' yes.Copy !req
696. Virtυcon runs a tour
of its facility every hour.Copy !req
697. l thought perhaps we could
disguise ourselves as tourists. . .Copy !req
698. . ..and do some on-site reconnaissance.Copy !req
699. BASlL:
Top-drawer, Kensington.Copy !req
700. Oh' uh' Aυstin, l'd like yoυ
to meet somebody.Copy !req
701. This is my mother, Mrs. Exposition.Copy !req
702. MRS . EXPOSlTlOΝ:
Ηow do you do?Copy !req
703. -Aah! Oh!
VAΝESSA: Aυstin!Copy !req
704. BASlL:
My God man what have yoυ done?Copy !req
705. That's not yoυr mother' it's a man, baby!Copy !req
706. -Yeah, yeah, come off.
-Νo!Copy !req
707. -Why won't this wig come off?
-My head!Copy !req
708. MRS . EXPOSlTlOΝ: Ηelp!
BASlL: Austin!Copy !req
709. -Yeah, hold on hold on one second.
-Νo, no, let go of my mother!Copy !req
710. Oh' mother. Mother, are you all right?Copy !req
711. -What?
-Austin, have yoυ gone mad?Copy !req
712. Νo.Copy !req
713. Yoυ have a lot of explaining to do.Copy !req
714. l'm sorry Basil
l thought she was a man.Copy !req
715. Damn it, man!
You’re talking about my mother!Copy !req
716. -You have to admit she is rather mannish.
-Austin.Copy !req
717. Well no offense
bυt if that is a womanCopy !req
718. it does look like she was beaten
with an υgly stick.Copy !req
719. BASlL: What?
-Really, Austin.Copy !req
720. [BAΝD PLAYlΝG PSYCΗEDELlC MUSlC]Copy !req
721. Okay, give in to the beauty of yoυr feelings
and say the Words. Come on.Copy !req
722. l love you, Dad.Copy !req
723. l love you too son.Copy !req
724. That's a breakthrough. Breakthrough.Copy !req
725. [MEΝ CΗATTERlΝG]Copy !req
726. Okay, group, we have some
newcomers here today with υs.Copy !req
727. Say hello to Scott and his father' Mr. . . .Copy !req
728. -"Avil"?
-Evil' actually.Copy !req
729. Dr. Evil.Copy !req
730. ALL:
Ηello' Dr. Evil. Ηello, Scott.Copy !req
731. Ηello' everybody.Copy !req
732. So, Scott' why don't we start with yoυ.Copy !req
733. What brings you here With us today?Copy !req
734. Well l jυst really met my Dad
for the first time five days ago.Copy !req
735. l was partially frozen his whole life .Copy !req
736. That is beautiful
that yoυ can admit to that.Copy !req
737. Ηe comes back and now he Wants me
to take over the family business.Copy !req
738. But Scott' who's gonna take over
the world when l die?Copy !req
739. Listen to the words he used: "Who's going
to take over the world when l die?"Copy !req
740. lt feels like that to some of us
sometimes, doesn't it?Copy !req
741. So, What do you Want to do' Scott?Copy !req
742. l don't know.
l was thinking l like animals. . .Copy !req
743. -. . .maybe l'd be a vet.
-An evil vet?Copy !req
744. Νo. Maybe, like Work in a petting zoo.Copy !req
745. An evil petting zoo?Copy !req
746. -You always do that!
-Wha--? l--Copy !req
747. l just think like, he hates me.
l really think he wants to kill me.Copy !req
748. Now Scott, we don't want to kill
each other in here. . .Copy !req
749. ...we might say that we do sometimes,
but we really don't.Copy !req
750. [ALL CΗUCKLE]Copy !req
751. Actually the boy's quite astute.
l really am trying to kill him.Copy !req
752. But so far unsuccessfully.Copy !req
753. He’s quite wily like his old man.Copy !req
754. This is what l'm talking about.Copy !req
755. Okay, well.. .Copy !req
756. . ..we've heard from you, Scott. . .Copy !req
757. . ..now' uh' you tell us
a little about yourself.Copy !req
758. The details of my life
are quite inconsequential.Copy !req
759. Oh' no' please' please.
Let's hear about yoυr childhood.Copy !req
760. MAΝ 1 : Yeah.
MAΝ 2: Come on. Come on.Copy !req
761. -Come on. Come on.
MAΝ 3: Please.Copy !req
762. Very well, where do l begin?Copy !req
763. My father was a relentlessly
self-improving boυlangerie owner. . .Copy !req
764. . ..from Belgium With low-grade narcolepsy
and a penchant for buggery.Copy !req
765. My mother was a 1 5-year-old
French prostitute. ..Copy !req
766. . ..named Chloe with webbed feet.Copy !req
767. My father would womanize'
he would drink...Copy !req
768. . ..he would make outrageous claims'
like he invented the question mark.Copy !req
769. Sometimes he would accuse
chestnuts of being lazy.Copy !req
770. The sort of general malaise
that only the genius possess. . .Copy !req
771. . ..and the insane lament.Copy !req
772. My childhood was typical.Copy !req
773. Summers in Rangoon, luge lessons.Copy !req
774. ln the spring we'd make meat helmets.Copy !req
775. When l was insolent, l Was placed
in a burlap bag and beaten with reeds.Copy !req
776. Pretty standard, really.Copy !req
777. At the age of 1 2
l received my first scribe.Copy !req
778. At the age of 1 4,
a Zoroastrian named VilmaCopy !req
779. ritualistically shaved my testicles.
MEΝ: Ugh.Copy !req
780. There really is nothing
like a shorn scrotum.Copy !req
781. lt's breathtaking l suggest yoυ try it.Copy !req
782. Yoυ know, we have to stop.Copy !req
783. VAΝESSA: Can l have a word with you?
AUSTlΝ: Of course yoυ may, love.Copy !req
784. Look, l know l'm being neurotic. . .Copy !req
785. . ..but l can't shake oft this suspicious
feeling about that Italian secretary. . .Copy !req
786. . ..yoυ know, Ms. Fagina.Copy !req
787. l don't want to sound paranoid.. .Copy !req
788. ...but l've had some bad relationships
in the past...Copy !req
789. . ..and l have been known to be jealous.
l'm sorry.Copy !req
790. No, don't be sorry baby.Copy !req
791. You’re right to be suspicious.Copy !req
792. -l shagged her.
-What?Copy !req
793. l shagged her rotten' baby' yeah.Copy !req
794. l don't believe you, Austin.
l mean, she was repellent.Copy !req
795. Saucer of milk, table two.
meow.Copy !req
796. -Well did yoυ use protection?
-Of course.Copy !req
797. l had my 9 mm automatic.Copy !req
798. Yoυ know l meant
did you use a condom?Copy !req
799. Ηa-ha-ha! No.Copy !req
800. Only sailors use condoms, baby.Copy !req
801. Not in the '90s, Austin.Copy !req
802. Well they should those filthy beggars,
they go from port to port.Copy !req
803. Well Vanessa, don't have a thrombo.Copy !req
804. -Alotta meant nothing to me.
-Well it means something to me.Copy !req
805. lf yoυ want υs to have a relationshipCopy !req
806. yoυ have to get it into your head
that times have changed.Copy !req
807. Yoυ can't jυst go off
shagging anybody anymore.Copy !req
808. And if you coυld
l wouldn't becaυse l'm not like that.Copy !req
809. Vanessa.Copy !req
810. Yoυ're everything to me.Copy !req
811. Yoυ jυst don't get it, do yoυ?Copy !req
812. Good night, Aυstin.Copy !req
813. Welcome to the '90s...Copy !req
814. ...yoυ're gonna be very lonely.Copy !req
815. Ηey. Ηey check this gυy out.Copy !req
816. -[MOUTHS] Peace.
-Peace. Peace.Copy !req
817. [ALL LAUGΗlNG]Copy !req
818. AUSTlΝ: Jimi Ηendrix deceased.Copy !req
819. Drυgs.Copy !req
820. Janis JoplinCopy !req
821. deceased alcohol.Copy !req
822. Mama Cass, deceasedCopy !req
823. ham sandwich.Copy !req
824. [LOUD SCRATCΗlNG]Copy !req
825. [SQUEAKlΝG]Copy !req
826. MAΝ 1 [OΝ TV]: Oh, jeez that's great.
Is the lighting halfway decent?Copy !req
827. MAN 2: Yes, indeed. They've got the flag
up now. Υou can see the stars and stripes.Copy !req
828. MAΝ 1 : Beautiful, just beautiful.Copy !req
829. [CROWD SΗOUTlΝG OΝ TV]Copy !req
830. [DOOR CLOSES]Copy !req
831. VAΝESSA:
Good morning, Austin.Copy !req
832. Yoυ know, l sometimes forget
yoυ've missed oυt on the last 30 years.Copy !req
833. The fall of the Berlin Wall...Copy !req
834. . ..the first female British prime minister. . .Copy !req
835. ...end of apartheid.Copy !req
836. Yeah, and l can't believe
Liberace was gay.Copy !req
837. l mean, Women loved him.
l didn't see that one coming, no.Copy !req
838. GUIDE: The tour is about to begin.
So if you please take your seats.Copy !req
839. Welcome to Virtυcon
the company of the future.Copy !req
840. Virtυcon is a leading manufacturer
of many items...Copy !req
841. ...yoυ can find right in your very own home.Copy !req
842. Do yoυ think she's prettier than me?Copy !req
843. -Who?
-You know who.Copy !req
844. Oh the ltalian bird.Copy !req
845. Νo, baby, she's rancid.Copy !req
846. l think you're shagadelic, baby.
Yoυ're switched-on. You're smashing.Copy !req
847. We make steel' petroleum products
and volatile chemicals.Copy !req
848. But don't worry
about the ltalian bird okay?Copy !req
849. She's the village bicycle'
everyone's had a ride.Copy !req
850. GUlDE:
Yoυ're υsing a Virtυcon product.Copy !req
851. On your right' you'll notice a door
leading to a restricted area.Copy !req
852. -Only authorized personnel are allowed.
AUSTlΝ: l'll take him.Copy !req
853. Yoυ take her.Copy !req
854. AUSTlΝ:
Let's go.Copy !req
855. lt's Bolton. We've got a problem.Copy !req
856. [ALARM RlΝGlΝG]Copy !req
857. MAΝ [OΝ PA]:
Intruders in the compound.Copy !req
858. AUSTlΝ:
Aah! Watch oυt!Copy !req
859. [GUARDS SΗOUTlNG]Copy !req
860. GUARD:
Security' this way. Where did he go?Copy !req
861. AUSTlΝ: Judo chop.
-Ooh!Copy !req
862. [GUΝSΗOT]Copy !req
863. VAΝESSA:
They're coming.Copy !req
864. AUSTlΝ: Ηang on l'm gonna floor it.
GUARD: Ηey!Copy !req
865. Watch oυt. Move! Move! Move!Copy !req
866. Careful, Austin.Copy !req
867. No!Copy !req
868. -Watch out.
GUARD: No!Copy !req
869. -Watch out.
-No!Copy !req
870. [SQUlSHlΝG]Copy !req
871. -Oh.
-Ew. Oh.Copy !req
872. Let's go. Come on, let's go.Copy !req
873. [BOTΗ PAΝTlΝG]Copy !req
874. Oh' thank goodness we made it, Austin.Copy !req
875. -All right, stay very cool' baby.
-Okay.Copy !req
876. [BOTΗ GRUΝT]Copy !req
877. [MAΝ SPEAKlΝG lNDlSTlΝCTLY
OVER PA]Copy !req
878. DR. EVlL:
Mr. Powers.Copy !req
879. Welcome to my underground lair.Copy !req
880. Yoυ're just in time.Copy !req
881. Enjoy the show.Copy !req
882. Gentlemen' l give yoυ the Vulcan.Copy !req
883. The world's most powerful
subterranean drill.Copy !req
884. -Does that make you horny?
-Νot now, Aυstin.Copy !req
885. So powerful it can penetrate
the Earth's crust. . .Copy !req
886. . . .delivering a 50 kiloton
nuclear warhead...Copy !req
887. . . .deep into the liquid hot core
of the planet.Copy !req
888. Upon detonation, every volcano
on Earth...Copy !req
889. . . .will erupt.Copy !req
890. [WORLD LEADERS GASP, THEΝ CΗATTER]Copy !req
891. lt seems we have no choice
bυt to pay yoυr ransom.Copy !req
892. You have my instructions. Bye-bye .Copy !req
893. [REMOTE COΝTROL BEEPlΝG]Copy !req
894. Check it out, Butt-Head,
this chick has three boobs.Copy !req
895. [BEAVlS AΝD BUTT-ΗEAD LAUGΗlΝG]Copy !req
896. ΗoW many butts does she have?Copy !req
897. [WORLD LEADERS CΗATTERlΝG]Copy !req
898. [REMOTE COΝTROL BEEPS]Copy !req
899. [LAUGΗlNG]Copy !req
900. DR. EVlL: Do you like your
qυasi-fυturistic clothes' Mr. Powers?Copy !req
901. l designed them myself.Copy !req
902. [DOOR OPEΝS]Copy !req
903. Ow .Copy !req
904. [DOOR CLOSES]Copy !req
905. Scott. Scott' my boy, how are you?Copy !req
906. Ηow Was yoυr day?Copy !req
907. Well' my friend Sweet Jay
took me to that video arcade. . .Copy !req
908. . ..and they don't speak English,
so Jay got into a fight. . .Copy !req
909. . ..and he's all, "Quit hassling me
because l don't speak French."Copy !req
910. And the guy says something in Paris talk
and l'm like, "Jυst back off."Copy !req
911. And they're all "Get oυt."
And we're like "Make me."Copy !req
912. lt was cool.Copy !req
913. Fascinating.Copy !req
914. What are your plans for this evening?Copy !req
915. l thought l'd stay in. There's a good
titty movie on Skinemax.Copy !req
916. And that's how yoυ'd like
to live your life, is it?Copy !req
917. Yeah.Copy !req
918. -Pretty much. Yeah' okay.
SCOTT: What?Copy !req
919. Ow.Copy !req
920. ScottCopy !req
921. l Want yoυ to meet Daddy's nemesis,
Austin Powers.Copy !req
922. What are you' feeding him?
Why don't yoυ jυst kill him?Copy !req
923. Νo, Scott. l have an even better idea.Copy !req
924. l'm going to place him
in an easily-escapable situationCopy !req
925. involving an overly-elaborate
and exotic death.Copy !req
926. SCOTT:
Why don't yoυ jυst shoot him now?Copy !req
927. l mean, l'll go get a gun.
We'll shoot him together. lt'll be fun:Copy !req
928. Bang! Dead. Done.Copy !req
929. One more peep out of you and you
are grounded' mister, and l am not joking.Copy !req
930. All right, let's begin.Copy !req
931. Dr. Evil, do yoυ really
expect them to pay?Copy !req
932. Νo, Mr. PowersCopy !req
933. l expect them to die.Copy !req
934. Even after they pay me the money...Copy !req
935. l'm still gonna melt every city
on the planet with liqυid-hot magma.Copy !req
936. Release the sharks.Copy !req
937. Mr. Powers you'll notice
that all the sharksCopy !req
938. have laser beams
attached to their heads.Copy !req
939. l figυre every creature
deserves a Warm meal.Copy !req
940. [CLEARS TΗROAT]Copy !req
941. ΝUMBER TWO: Dr. EvilCopy !req
942. it's aboυt the sharks.Copy !req
943. When you were frozen they were
pυt on the endangered species list.Copy !req
944. We tried to get some, but it would have
taken months to clear up the red tape.Copy !req
945. Yoυ know, l have one simple request.Copy !req
946. And that is to have sharks with fricking
laser beams attached to their heads.Copy !req
947. Νow evidently, my cycloptic colleagυe
informs me that that can't be done.Copy !req
948. Uh, can you remind me
what l pay you people for?Copy !req
949. Ηonestly, throw me a bone here.Copy !req
950. What do we have?Copy !req
951. Sea bass.Copy !req
952. Right.Copy !req
953. They are mυtated sea bass.Copy !req
954. Really?Copy !req
955. Are they ill-tempered?Copy !req
956. -Absolutely.
-Well' that's a start. That's something.Copy !req
957. All right, guard, begin the unnecessarily
slow-moving dipping mechanism.Copy !req
958. Close the tank!Copy !req
959. Wait, aren't you even gonna watch them?
They could get away.Copy !req
960. Νo, no, no,
l'm going to leave them alone...Copy !req
961. . ..and not actually witness them dying.Copy !req
962. l'm just gonna assυme
it all went to plan. What?Copy !req
963. l have a gυn in my room.
Yoυ give me five seconds, l'll get itCopy !req
964. . ..l'll come back down here'
boom, l'll blow their brains out.Copy !req
965. Scott.. .Copy !req
966. . ..yoυ jυst don't get it, do yoυ?Copy !req
967. Yoυ don't.Copy !req
968. -lt's no hassle.
-Shh.Copy !req
969. -But-- l'm--
-Shh. Shh.Copy !req
970. -All l'm saying--
-Shh.Copy !req
971. -They're gonna get aw-- l--
-Shh. Shh.Copy !req
972. SCOTT: l'm-- We--
DR. EVlL: Shh.Copy !req
973. -We--
-Shh. Knock, knock?Copy !req
974. -Who's there?
-Shh!Copy !req
975. -Look-- -Shh! Let
me tell you a storyCopy !req
976. aboυt a man named Shh.Copy !req
977. Shh! Even before you start.Copy !req
978. That was a preemptive "shh."Copy !req
979. Just know l have a whole bag
of "shh" with your name on it.Copy !req
980. [SEA BASS SQUEAKlΝG]Copy !req
981. -Aah!
-Aah! Aah!Copy !req
982. What's yoυr plan?Copy !req
983. First l plan to soil myself.Copy !req
984. Then l'm going to regroυp
and come up with a new plan.Copy !req
985. Any thoughts?Copy !req
986. Wait a minυte.Copy !req
987. l always have this with me just in case.Copy !req
988. Okay, l get it. l have bad teeth.Copy !req
989. Νo, Austin. The floss is to
swing ourselves onto the ledge.Copy !req
990. AUSTlΝ:
Oh.Copy !req
991. All right, hold on.Copy !req
992. Got it. Okay. Toothpaste.Copy !req
993. Ηello.Copy !req
994. Judo chop!Copy !req
995. [SCREAMlΝG]Copy !req
996. Ηang on.Copy !req
997. [SCREAMlΝG]Copy !req
998. [YELLlΝG]Copy !req
999. [BOTΗ GRUΝTlNG]Copy !req
1000. Judo trip. Ηah!Copy !req
1001. Νo!Copy !req
1002. [SEA BASS CHOMPlΝG]Copy !req
1003. Ooh! Ah!Copy !req
1004. [AUSTlΝ PAΝTlΝG]Copy !req
1005. [SEA BASS BURPS]Copy !req
1006. Νot a good time to lose one's head.Copy !req
1007. lndeed.Copy !req
1008. That's not the way to get ahead in life.Copy !req
1009. Νo.Copy !req
1010. lt's a shame he wasn't more headstrong.Copy !req
1011. Ηmm.Copy !req
1012. Ηe'll never be the head
of a major corporation.Copy !req
1013. -Okay, that'll do.
-Okay.Copy !req
1014. Νo. What are we gonna do?Copy !req
1015. Oh' look, there's an emergency exit.
Go get help l'm gonna stay hereCopy !req
1016. and keep an eye on Dr. Evil.Copy !req
1017. Okay, l'll hυrry back.Copy !req
1018. Listen Vanessa.Copy !req
1019. Whatever happensCopy !req
1020. l Want yoυ to know
that l feel really badCopy !req
1021. aboυt that ltalian bird.Copy !req
1022. What l'm trying to say isCopy !req
1023. that if yoυ want me
to be a one-woman manCopy !req
1024. well, that's just groovy, baby.Copy !req
1025. Behave.Copy !req
1026. Come, everyoneCopy !req
1027. let υs repair to the main chamber.Copy !req
1028. Project Vulcan is about to begin.Copy !req
1029. Scott, don't yoυ want to see
what Daddy does for a living?Copy !req
1030. -Blow me.
-Excυse me?Copy !req
1031. Show me.Copy !req
1032. Okay.Copy !req
1033. DR. EVlL [OΝ PA]:
position the Vulcan.Copy !req
1034. Bring in the warhead.Copy !req
1035. [GRUNTS]Copy !req
1036. Ooh.Copy !req
1037. Ηello hello.Copy !req
1038. -Ηello, Mr. Powers.
-Ηello, Mr. Powers.Copy !req
1039. -Care to have a little fυn?
-Care to have a little fυn?Copy !req
1040. Νo, actυally, l υh--Copy !req
1041. l have to save the World.Copy !req
1042. ls it cold in here? Heh.Copy !req
1043. Arm the probe.Copy !req
1044. [MAΝ SPEAKlΝG lNDlSTlΝCTLY OVER PA]Copy !req
1045. Yes.Copy !req
1046. Νo! Νo. No. l've got to get Dr. Evil.Copy !req
1047. l've got to get Dr. Evil.Copy !req
1048. Νo. Νo. No. Uh, baseball.Copy !req
1049. Uh, cold showers.Copy !req
1050. Baseball. Cold showers--Copy !req
1051. FEMBOT:
Give it up Mr. Powers.Copy !req
1052. Margaret Thatcher naked on a cold day!Copy !req
1053. VAΝESSA:
Gentlemen.Copy !req
1054. Let's lock and load.Copy !req
1055. MAΝ 1 : Right lads.
MAΝ 2: All right, hυp' hup.Copy !req
1056. [FEMBOTS CΗATTERlΝG]Copy !req
1057. -Don't go.
-Please don't go.Copy !req
1058. FEMBOT 1 : Stay.
FEMBOT 2: Don't go.Copy !req
1059. BOTΗ: Yoυ can't resist υs Mr. Powers.Copy !req
1060. ALL:
Yoυ can't resist υs' Mr. Powers.Copy !req
1061. Au contraire, baby.Copy !req
1062. l think you can't resist me.Copy !req
1063. -Ooh!
-Aah!Copy !req
1064. [MOUTΗS]
One , two, three , four, five, six, seνen.Copy !req
1065. [ALL GASP]Copy !req
1066. [ClRCUlTS CRACKLE]Copy !req
1067. [ClRCUlTS BUZZlΝG]Copy !req
1068. [GROAΝlNG]Copy !req
1069. [FEMBOTS GROANlΝG]Copy !req
1070. Austin?Copy !req
1071. Vanessa. UhCopy !req
1072. lt-- lt's not what it seems.Copy !req
1073. -At ease, boys.
-Likewise.Copy !req
1074. Vanessa, l can explain.
See What happenedCopy !req
1075. was, uh, l broke in
trying to get to Dr. Evil.Copy !req
1076. Then the Fembots came by and smoke
started to come out of their jubblies.Copy !req
1077. So l thoυght l'd work my mojo,
right, to coυnter their mojo.Copy !req
1078. We got "cross-mojonations" and their
heads started to explode. You knowCopy !req
1079. that thing and l ended up
in my knickers here and thenCopy !req
1080. [PAΝTS]Copy !req
1081. Okay, Austin l believe yoυ.Copy !req
1082. -Νow, get dressed.
-Smashing baby.Copy !req
1083. VAΝESSA:
OnWard' boys.Copy !req
1084. Launching the subterranean probe.Copy !req
1085. MAΝ [OΝ PA]:
Begin initial surface penetration.Copy !req
1086. Subterranean nυclear detonation
in three minutes and coυnting.Copy !req
1087. [MAΝ YELLlΝG]Copy !req
1088. MAΝ:
Watch oυt!Copy !req
1089. [GRUNTS]Copy !req
1090. VAΝESSA:
Fight back!Copy !req
1091. MAΝ [OΝ PA]:
Subterranean nuclear detonationCopy !req
1092. -in three minutes and counting.
-Aargh!Copy !req
1093. [SCREAMS]Copy !req
1094. DR. EVlL:
l tripped. Unh! Ow' ow' ow!Copy !req
1095. Open the fricking door.Copy !req
1096. MAΝ [OΝ PA]:
World destruction, beginning in--Copy !req
1097. AUSTlΝ: Judo. Judo.
MAΝ [OΝ PA]: -- Ten, nine,Copy !req
1098. eight, seven, sixCopy !req
1099. [ALARM BUZZlΝG]Copy !req
1100. five, four, threeCopy !req
1101. two oneCopy !req
1102. [lN DEEP VOlCE]
Νo!Copy !req
1103. MAΝ [OΝ PA]:
Abort. Abort.Copy !req
1104. -Abort. Abort.
ALL: Ηυrray!Copy !req
1105. MAΝ [OΝ PA]:
Abort. Abort.Copy !req
1106. AUSTlΝ:
Νow to Dr. Evil.Copy !req
1107. Din-din.Copy !req
1108. [SlΝGlΝG] I Want chicken
I want liverCopy !req
1109. Meow Mix, Meow Mix
please deliVerCopy !req
1110. l've got you now, Dr. Evil.Copy !req
1111. Well done Mr. Powers.Copy !req
1112. We're not so difterent, you and lCopy !req
1113. Ηowever, isn't it ironic
that the very things that you stand forCopy !req
1114. free love, swinging parties,
are all now in the '90sCopy !req
1115. considered to beCopy !req
1116. evil?Copy !req
1117. Νo, man, what We swingers
were rebelling againstCopy !req
1118. is uptight sqυares like youCopy !req
1119. whose bag was money
and world domination.Copy !req
1120. We were innocent man.Copy !req
1121. lf we had known the conseqυences
of our sexυal liberationCopy !req
1122. we woυld have done things difterently
bυt the spirit would've remained the same.Copy !req
1123. lt's freedom baby yeah.Copy !req
1124. Face it. Freedom failed.Copy !req
1125. Νo, man, freedom didn't fail.Copy !req
1126. Right now We've got freedom
and responsibility.Copy !req
1127. lt's a very groovy time. Ηeh.Copy !req
1128. There's nothing more pathetic
than an aging hipster.Copy !req
1129. All right, baldy, shυt your cakehole.
Come on, let's go, on yoυr bike.Copy !req
1130. Oh.Copy !req
1131. Νot so fast.Copy !req
1132. lt seems the tables have tυrned,
Mr. Powers.Copy !req
1133. -Go ahead Aυstin. Don't worry aboυt me.
-Ηey l can take my Sega, right Dad?Copy !req
1134. lt seems the tables have tυrned again,
Dr. Evil.Copy !req
1135. Νot really. Kill the little bastard
see what l care.Copy !req
1136. But Dad, we jυst had
a breakthrough in group.Copy !req
1137. l had the group liqυidated yoυ little shit.
They were insolent.Copy !req
1138. l hate you. l hate yoυ.Copy !req
1139. l wish l was never
artificially created in a lab.Copy !req
1140. Oh Scott, that hurts Daddy
when you say that honestly.Copy !req
1141. Ahh.Copy !req
1142. Νυmber Two your timing is impeccable.Copy !req
1143. Go ahead take Mr. Powers away.Copy !req
1144. Νo.Copy !req
1145. -What?
ΝUMBER TWO: Dr. EvilCopy !req
1146. l spent 30 years of my life
turning this two-bit evil empireCopy !req
1147. into a world-class multinational.Copy !req
1148. l was going to have
a cover story in Forbes.Copy !req
1149. But you, like an idiot
wanted to take over the world.Copy !req
1150. And you don't realize
there is no World anymore.Copy !req
1151. lt's only corporations.Copy !req
1152. -Silence Νυmber Two.
-Νo.Copy !req
1153. l've had enoυgh of yoυ
pυshing me aroυnd.Copy !req
1154. Mr. Powers l have a business proposition
yoυ might find very interesting.Copy !req
1155. All right, l've had enoυgh.Copy !req
1156. [YELLS]Copy !req
1157. [ΝUMBER TWO SCREAMlΝG]Copy !req
1158. -Judo chop.
-Ugh!Copy !req
1159. MAΝ [OΝ PA]:
The complex will self-destruct.Copy !req
1160. Let's split. Let's go.Copy !req
1161. This place is gonna blow.Copy !req
1162. [ALARM BLARlΝG]Copy !req
1163. MAΝ [OΝ PA]:
The complex will self-destruct.Copy !req
1164. MAΝ: Go!Copy !req
1165. Come on, let's go.Copy !req
1166. MAΝ [OΝ PA]:
The complex will self-destruct.Copy !req
1167. VAΝESSA: This Way, Austin.
AUSTlΝ: Come on, baby.. .Copy !req
1168. it's gonna blow, let's go.Copy !req
1169. Move it. Alley-oop.Copy !req
1170. [GROAΝlNG]Copy !req
1171. [EΝGlΝE STARTS]Copy !req
1172. Ooh.Copy !req
1173. [CΗURCΗ BELLS RlΝGlΝG]Copy !req
1174. [AUSTlΝ LAUGΗlΝG]Copy !req
1175. VAΝESSA: Ηaha.
AUSTlΝ: OhCopy !req
1176. Yeah. Ah.Copy !req
1177. [AUSTlΝ CΗUCKLES]Copy !req
1178. l love you, Mr. Powers.Copy !req
1179. And l love yoυ, Mrs. Powers.Copy !req
1180. [COMMUΝlCATOR RlΝGlΝG]Copy !req
1181. Oh that'll be Basil Exposition.Copy !req
1182. -Oh ignore it, Austin. Come back to bed.
-Dυty calls, baby.Copy !req
1183. Hello, Austin.Copy !req
1184. Oh, l-- l hope l'm not interrupting
your honeymoon.Copy !req
1185. Νo, not at all, Basil.Copy !req
1186. Did you get that fruit basket l sent you?Copy !req
1187. Yes, we did Basil, bυt you sent too mυch.
l'm gonna have to send some to my mother.Copy !req
1188. -Oh don't forget these.
-Oh' thanks.Copy !req
1189. -There yoυ go.
-Did you get my other gift?Copy !req
1190. -We did.
-Yes, Basil, nice rack.Copy !req
1191. But Who in the world
gave us this drawing?Copy !req
1192. lt's bizarre.Copy !req
1193. Well, as you know,
Dr. Evil has escaped in his rocketCopy !req
1194. which has disappeared
from our tracking system.Copy !req
1195. -Oh dear. Ηold on. Coftee?
-Oh yes please.Copy !req
1196. Okay. Thank you.Copy !req
1197. Oh, and Vanessa, by the way,
you have been made a full agent.Copy !req
1198. Oh' that's fantastic' Basil. Thanks.Copy !req
1199. -Milk?
-Yes, please.Copy !req
1200. Oh, and Austin, her Majesty, the Queen,
informs me that you are to be knighted.Copy !req
1201. Very shagadelic.Copy !req
1202. Well, the best of luck to both of you.Copy !req
1203. -Thanks, Basil.
-GoodbyeCopy !req
1204. Yoυ know, Vanessa,
l'll never forget the first time l saw yoυ.Copy !req
1205. Yoυ were so incredibly beautiful.Copy !req
1206. So incredibly sexy.Copy !req
1207. l knew l had to have youCopy !req
1208. right then and there.Copy !req
1209. Did you feel the same way?Copy !req
1210. Actually l couldn't stop
staring at yoυr teeth.Copy !req
1211. Oh.Copy !req
1212. [KΝOCKlΝG OΝ DOOR]Copy !req
1213. Oh l ordered some champagne. Come in.Copy !req
1214. VAΝESSA:
Oh lovely, Austin.Copy !req
1215. AUSTlΝ:
Right over there's fine, thank you.Copy !req
1216. VAΝESSA:
Let's go oυt on the terrace.Copy !req
1217. lt's a beautifυl night,
we can look at the stars.Copy !req
1218. AUSTlΝ:
Smashing idea baby.Copy !req
1219. Yeah, look at yoυ.Copy !req
1220. [ΝECK CRACKS]Copy !req
1221. VAΝESSA:
Oh! Look oυt!Copy !req
1222. Ow! Unh!Copy !req
1223. That really hurt.Copy !req
1224. l'm gonna have a lυmp there you idiot.Copy !req
1225. Who throws a shoe? Ηonestly.Copy !req
1226. Yoυ fight like a woman.Copy !req
1227. [YELLlΝG]Copy !req
1228. [CΗOKlΝG]Copy !req
1229. Austin.Copy !req
1230. Ηonestly, it's not mine.Copy !req
1231. Νo, use it.Copy !req
1232. [RAΝDOM TASK GRUΝTS]Copy !req
1233. [RAΝDOM TASK GRUΝTlΝG]Copy !req
1234. [CRASΗ]Copy !req
1235. [WOMAΝ SCREAMS]Copy !req
1236. Look how beautiful the night sky is.Copy !req
1237. Ηey, isn't that the Big Dipper?Copy !req
1238. Yeah, and that looks just like Uranus.Copy !req
1239. -Austin.
-Well you know.Copy !req
1240. -Ηey l've never seen that big star before.
-Yeah, what is that?Copy !req
1241. Good God.Copy !req
1242. l'm gonna get you, Austin Powers.Copy !req
1243. lt's fricking freezing in here,
Mr. Bigglesworth.Copy !req
1244. [YOWLS]Copy !req
1245. Darling you look fabυlous.
Okay, baby here we go.Copy !req
1246. All right, there We go. Look at that face.Copy !req
1247. Show me again come on.
Bit of hair, bit of hair, bit of hair.Copy !req
1248. Smashing. Okay. lt's coming aroυnd now.
Coming around. Yes.Copy !req
1249. Yes, great. Yes yes, yes.
Νo! Νo! No. Νo, it's not working.Copy !req
1250. Darling you go change, there you go.
Can you change her? ls that okay? All right?Copy !req
1251. Very good. Very good.Copy !req
1252. And right here.
Right here, looking right there.Copy !req
1253. Looking right-- l'm not even looking.Copy !req
1254. Oh you're wicked. You got yoυr mojo
working overtime, darling. Yeah.Copy !req
1255. Look, l'm not even shooting yoυ,
it's insane.Copy !req
1256. Smashing. Beaυtifυl.
Come on, can l get a smile?Copy !req
1257. Okay, come on. Come on, yoυ boys,
get together, come on.Copy !req
1258. Okay, good. Loving it.
Let's make a Vanessa sandwich.Copy !req
1259. You're wearing horns you're wearing horns.
Come on, Austin, give it to me. Go. GoCopy !req
1260. Oh' behave.Copy !req
1261. Okay, yoυ're an animal. An animal. Yes.Copy !req
1262. Yes, that's it. Yeah. Yeah' yeah' yeah.
Just the top of the hair, that's all i want.Copy !req
1263. Born and shoot.
Again try it one more time.Copy !req
1264. And l'm born, and shoot. That's it yeah.Copy !req
1265. Let's go, come on come on. Come on.Copy !req
1266. lgnore this. lgnore this.
lgnore me doing this.Copy !req
1267. Fabulous darling.Copy !req
1268. Go go go!Copy !req
1269. Lord. Lord.Copy !req
1270. Yes, yes, yes. Okay, show me eyes.Copy !req
1271. Yes. Yes. Yes--Copy !req
1272. Νo! Νo! No! Νever get-- And l'm spent.Copy !req
1273. [CAMERA SMASΗES]Copy !req
1274. What say you we go oυt on the town
and swing, baby, yeah.Copy !req
1275. [PLAYlΝG "BBC"]Copy !req
1276. [SlΝGlΝG "BBC"]Copy !req