1. Come on! Come on, baby!Copy !req
2. Dammit!Copy !req
3. I can't hold him for much longer!Copy !req
4. You wanna know what the problem is?
The problem is it ain't starting.Copy !req
5. Yeah, because of something you just did!Copy !req
6. I just been sitting in it!Copy !req
7. Your butt made it not start. Thanks!Copy !req
8. See if the radio works.Copy !req
9. I'm not listening to Egypt's Only Country.
Are you nuts?Copy !req
10. I listen to The Sand,
Cairo's home for classic rock!Copy !req
11. Will you guys get out of here?
I can't hold him for much...Copy !req
12. Let's let a real man handle this!Copy !req
13. - This thing ain't got no engine.
- Hello?Copy !req
14. You need to check the air-tires?Copy !req
15. That's where the power is generated!Copy !req
16. And that was the problem, wasn't it?Copy !req
17. No. While you was fighting
that thing-dog, I...Copy !req
18. I called a tow truck.Copy !req
19. None of that shit ever happened
and you know it!Copy !req
20. - Frylock! You're alive!
- Not quite.Copy !req
21. Allow me to explain.Copy !req
22. With Frylock in my arms,
I stumbled upon a witch doctor.Copy !req
23. Yo, what up, G?Copy !req
24. Who was able to provide us
with food, shelter...Copy !req
25. and some kick-ass video games.Copy !req
26. Yeah, you get pumping.
That's how you pump!Copy !req
27. Come on, come on!Copy !req
28. Get there!Copy !req
29. Come on!Copy !req
30. - Yes!
- Glory! Glory!Copy !req
31. - That's how you do it!
- The plantation is safe!Copy !req
32. Beatdown city, man!Copy !req
33. - The slaves are yours!
- The South rises again!Copy !req
34. You gotta watch out
for my musket skills, baby!Copy !req
35. You are great at that game.
Your friend is terrible, though.Copy !req
36. Yeah, he sucks.Copy !req
37. He's dead!Copy !req
38. You know, I don't advertise this
but I can bring him back to life.Copy !req
39. - It's something I do, but it's up to you.
- I'll bet you can't.Copy !req
40. Yeah? How much you wanna bet, bro?Copy !req
41. And so a bet was made.
And you know I totally would've won...Copy !req
42. had the friggin CIA not busted in.Copy !req
43. We know you're in there Lincoln!
We've got the place surrounded!Copy !req
44. To the new Beetle convertible!Copy !req
45. Alright, everybody freeze!Copy !req
46. Don't move!Copy !req
47. We know you're invisible.Copy !req
48. - Crank up some jams!
- I do the radio.Copy !req
49. I need me some Sand! K-Sand!Copy !req
50. Yeah!Copy !req
51. Take a break! Biggie time.Copy !req
52. Just because we fought
one invisible criminal...Copy !req
53. doesn't mean everybody's invisible.Copy !req
54. I understand that, but it does mean
that some of them could be invisible...Copy !req
55. and I think
they're all invisible in this room.Copy !req
56. I don't know
where you get your ideas, T.J.Copy !req
57. Hurry!
This rocket should take you as far as...Copy !req
58. Come on!Copy !req
59. I was saying, this rocket
should take you as far as Pluto.Copy !req
60. - What about Frylock?
- He should wake up at any moment.Copy !req
61. But I must warn you...Copy !req
62. from now on
he will be extraordinarily dumb.Copy !req
63. - Be gone ye!
- OK, but first let's all get picture together.Copy !req
64. - Lincoln, you the tallest...
- Everybody freeze.Copy !req
65. Go, God damn it! Go!Copy !req
66. We know you're invisible, so don't move!Copy !req
67. - No one will catch Time Lincoln!
- Shoot before he transports!Copy !req
68. No one, ever!Copy !req
69. Oh, great.
You just had to shoot, didn't you?Copy !req
70. - Way to change the future.
- What do you mean?Copy !req
71. Pull, whitey, pull!Copy !req
72. And so Frylock is with us,
in a manner of speaking...Copy !req
73. but he would never recover his smartness.Copy !req
74. And that's why
I have to cut up his food for him.Copy !req
75. Frylock, is all this true?
Is that where we come from?Copy !req
76. He doesn't understand your talking.
You must draw him pictures.Copy !req
77. But you should use bright colors.
That's the only way you can catch his eyes.Copy !req
78. The truth is, Meatwad,
I don't know where we came from.Copy !req
79. But I do know how we're gonna die.Copy !req
80. Aqua Teen!Copy !req
81. My father built this castle.Copy !req
82. He said that Weirds would live here
for a thousand years...Copy !req
83. and now it's being turned
into fucking lofts!Copy !req
84. Well, you could still stay here.
I mean, you could buy a unit...Copy !req
85. - These look pretty cool.
- Look at this unit!Copy !req
86. Can you... help him move out?Copy !req
87. Inside out?Copy !req
88. You know what?Copy !req
89. I'm just gonna let you have this one.
You can have it.Copy !req
90. - For free.
- But we wanna pay!Copy !req
91. Check one, two. Check.Copy !req
92. Check, check, check.
One, two, buckle my shoe.Copy !req
93. Three-four, shut the door, check, check.Copy !req
94. - Checking the mic.
- It's checked.Copy !req
95. Checkin' the mic, check.
Checkin' the mic, check.Copy !req
96. Check, check, check, checking the mic.Copy !req
97. Mic check, checking the mic, mic check.Copy !req
98. - It's checked!
- Check.Copy !req
99. - Sibilance. Sibilance. Sibilance.
- It's checked already! It's checked!Copy !req
100. It is? OK, good.
And we got all these in tune, right?Copy !req
101. - Tell me these are in tune.
- Yeah.Copy !req
102. - They're dolls.
- Shoot.Copy !req
103. Are they in tune?Copy !req
104. - What's all this to do?
- This is Meatwad's concert tour.Copy !req
105. - Girl Quest 2005.
- Read the t-shirt, fool.Copy !req
106. - There's gonna be girls here?
- Yep. I advertised.Copy !req
107. What the fuck?Copy !req
108. See, women love kitty cats.Copy !req
109. That's why we gonna fire 'em out
of these high-powered plasma cannons.Copy !req
110. Meatwad, you need to go on.Copy !req
111. The sooner you go on,
the sooner everyone can go home.Copy !req
112. Good evening, New Jersey!Copy !req
113. How's the air conditioning out there?Copy !req
114. Well, let's see
if we can turn the heat up!Copy !req
115. What the?
Who's throwing potatoes up here?Copy !req
116. I'll shut this show down!Copy !req
117. - Alright Meatwad, we are done!
- Wait, hang on, we're gonna do this.Copy !req
118. Fire!Copy !req
119. Dang it.Copy !req
120. - I guess I didn't pack 'em right.
- Fools!Copy !req
121. Like being at the Vietnamese Butcher!Copy !req
122. Neil?Copy !req
123. Neil?Copy !req
124. - Cut it out, Neil!
- Sorry, Walter.Copy !req
125. It's Mr. Melon to you! You...Copy !req
126. fool!
- Fuck it!Copy !req
127. I can't work under these conditions!Copy !req
128. I want a diet water and
I want my mommy right now!Copy !req
129. Meatwad, women don't need to be wooed...Copy !req
130. with an electric guitar by a meatball.Copy !req
131. What women want are these.Copy !req
132. Pythons.
Check it out.Copy !req
133. Go ahead, touch it. Quick.Copy !req
134. - Who farted?
- Shake.Copy !req
135. Not all women are into muscles.Copy !req
136. Well, the beautiful ones are.
The ones in Miami.Copy !req
137. Come on.
All women are beautiful, on the inside.Copy !req
138. I know that, yeah,
I've been inside of them.Copy !req
139. Their homes.
That's where I go when they leave for work.Copy !req
140. I get to know 'em before I meet 'em...Copy !req
141. and then I wait for them outside,
behind a bush.Copy !req
142. - That what gets me off.
- Gets you off what?Copy !req
143. The... the chain.
Off the chain.Copy !req
144. Follow me and learn!
Sex ed has begun.Copy !req
145. Now this square is the...Copy !req
146. man.
- OK.Copy !req
147. - This circle here, that's the uterus.
- That's what it looks like?Copy !req
148. Up close, yes.
This is lifelike drawing of the uterus.Copy !req
149. See the guy takes the car after his job...Copy !req
150. to pick up the uterus at her house.Copy !req
151. Because she doesn't work
unless she's sweeping up something.Copy !req
152. And where do they go?Copy !req
153. All the way... to a hotel...Copy !req
154. which definitely has cable.Copy !req
155. And that's where
this trapezoid becomes...Copy !req
156. shall we say... entangled,Copy !req
157. with the exposed
and aerated crotches.Copy !req
158. And that there
is the exposed crotches?Copy !req
159. I told you
that's the chair and the spatula.Copy !req
160. - I knew it.
- Congratulate yourself, my friend.Copy !req
161. You have just been laid.Copy !req
162. - That feels good.
- Yeah, I never tire of it.Copy !req
163. You think that women are attracted to me?Copy !req
164. Well, I think they pity you.
Because you're overweight.Copy !req
165. I mean, a lot of it has to do
with having a good body.Copy !req
166. Well, you ain't got no good body!Copy !req
167. I have a great body,
and I get it by doing reps.Copy !req
168. No way. You got a machine?Copy !req
169. I don't have a machine.Copy !req
170. I have the machine!Copy !req
171. Behold.
The machine!Copy !req
172. The Insanoflex!Copy !req
173. Behold, my Elvis costume!
I ain't seen that since Halloween.Copy !req
174. Let me tell you about the system.Copy !req
175. Rumor has it...Copy !req
176. it was brought back
from a more advanced time...Copy !req
177. the time, of course, of Timecop...Copy !req
178. to train my buns!Copy !req
179. Show me how to get some pythons
like Chief Wahoo McDaniel.Copy !req
180. No no, you can't just hop into this,
you'll hurt yourself.Copy !req
181. Start stretching out by helping me drag it
in front of the TV, OK? Let's go.Copy !req
182. And, one!Copy !req
183. Push, keep pushing!Copy !req
184. Keep pushing!Copy !req
185. Ain't that the reason
you exercise in the first place?Copy !req
186. - So you could move something like this?
- No!Copy !req
187. - That is not the reason.
- Alright. What's the reason?Copy !req
188. Poontang.
Poontang is the grubby little middleman...Copy !req
189. you must go through
to get the girls.Copy !req
190. It's not even assembled right.
Look at this.Copy !req
191. That's... that's... Yeah...Copy !req
192. so you can do it on a plane,
business trips.Copy !req
193. Look at this. One, two...Copy !req
194. - OK, and where are the directions?
- I know, I don't know!Copy !req
195. You know, the internet
is a popular source of information.Copy !req
196. And the internet is also a popular way...Copy !req
197. to play some of my favorite games, like...Copy !req
198. Crystal Meth, Nightmare Killing Spree...Copy !req
199. and Clamdigger - Head To Head.Copy !req
200. - Here I go.
- Don't you touch my computer!Copy !req
201. Oh my God.Copy !req
202. There must be fifty bras on this page!Copy !req
203. - I gotta get on that!
- No! No, no, no!Copy !req
204. Somebody's been bra-shopping in here!Copy !req
205. - Let me see! Come on!
- Do you mind?Copy !req
206. - Damn!
- You will bookmark that.Copy !req
207. - You've never seen a bra before?
- Not with the boob meat inside of it!Copy !req
208. OK. Search for Insanoflex.Copy !req
209. Oh my God! Again.Copy !req
210. - Oh my God.
- Oh my God.Copy !req
211. These directions are written
in some sort of rare, robot dialect.Copy !req
212. - Oh my God.
- Please, translate.Copy !req
213. - Well, I speak robot.
- This is odd.Copy !req
214. - It's almost as if...
- I speak robot.Copy !req
215. I heard you.
I'm sorry, continue with your translation.Copy !req
216. It's as if someone
didn't want us to put this together.Copy !req
217. - And yet they sold it to us.
- I speak robotanese.Copy !req
218. Danger.
Deadly death danger.Copy !req
219. Beware.
You must never, ever, ever, ever...Copy !req
220. ever, ever, ever...Copy !req
221. ever, ever, ever,
ever assemble the Insanoflex!Copy !req
222. Need help assembling?
Because we said not to?Copy !req
223. So is there a number you can translate?
Can you at least do that?Copy !req
224. Yeah, there is.Copy !req
225. 2937584923Copy !req
226. 04747483Copy !req
227. 7438445...Copy !req
228. Don't do it. Enjoy.Copy !req
229. Man, the phone's ringing.Copy !req
230. Yes, I can see that,
these work, you know!Copy !req
231. Do not touch the phone!Copy !req
232. - What the...
- Intruder!Copy !req
233. I am the Cybernetic Ghost
of Christmas Past.Copy !req
234. Do you have a... a quick second?Copy !req
235. - Sure.
- Thousands of years ago into the future...Copy !req
236. your race will develop
the ultimate exercise machine...Copy !req
237. that has irresistible force
and immovable object...Copy !req
238. with over 90 exercises
and an infinite amount of weight...Copy !req
239. and plus it has a rowing machine
for cardiovascular workout...Copy !req
240. and a clicker that allows you
to keep track of your reps.Copy !req
241. Every time you do a rep it clicks "One".Copy !req
242. The button is big and red...Copy !req
243. a color which no longer exists in your time.Copy !req
244. Cool dude!
How do I order?Copy !req
245. You fool! Don't you understand?
You built it!Copy !req
246. If this machine falls into the wrong abs...Copy !req
247. the world as you know it will become
a world as you've never imagined it...Copy !req
248. starring Chow Yun-Fat.Copy !req
249. What are you saying?Copy !req
250. Because I don't even know
what you're talking about anymore.Copy !req
251. Are you saying
that someone could become so buff...Copy !req
252. that he could score like,
all the world's ass...Copy !req
253. and thus creating
massive global inbreeding...Copy !req
254. ultimately bring population
growth to a standstill?Copy !req
255. No!Copy !req
256. Well I wasn't thinking that,
but that could happen.Copy !req
257. Dude, I totally want one!Copy !req
258. Sorry.Copy !req
259. - I still want one.
- Oh, sure.Copy !req
260. You'll set it up,
but it will take you over a week...Copy !req
261. and you'll keep telling yourself
"I should hop on that and use it"...Copy !req
262. because these slacks no longer fit right.Copy !req
263. You have got to answer
that fucking phone.Copy !req
264. - It's driving me nuts!
- Let the machine get it.Copy !req
265. - Hello?
- Hello?Copy !req
266. Hey man, how's it going?Copy !req
267. - Pretty good.
- I pull your leg out!Copy !req
268. Oh, dammit!Copy !req
269. We need a new machine.Copy !req
270. So, how do you even know all this?Copy !req
271. Fortunately for humanity,
I traveled forward into the Bahamas...Copy !req
272. but also back in time, to steal this!Copy !req
273. - That's a screw.
- No.Copy !req
274. It is part XJ32...Copy !req
275. which is to fasten the
Pectomizer to the Ab-Eraser...Copy !req
276. to the thing!Copy !req
277. Without this one piece, the Insanoflex...Copy !req
278. would fall apart.Copy !req
279. Watch this.Copy !req
280. She loves it.Copy !req
281. So, that thing is basically a screw.Copy !req
282. Yes, it screws into things.Copy !req
283. So can't they just go
buy a screw or something?Copy !req
284. Shit.Copy !req
285. I mean, I'd probably
just shove a pencil in the screw hole.Copy !req
286. I just shoved a pencil in the screw hole.Copy !req
287. It better not be mine.
My algebra homework is due tomorrow.Copy !req
288. Gonna work out on this thing or not?Copy !req
289. I'll work out on your face.Copy !req
290. Bring me the vegetable oil.
I think I'm gonna pose right here.Copy !req
291. Show you boys how it's done!Copy !req
292. Women drop to their knees
when they see the shape of my fingers.Copy !req
293. They're like beautiful
little muscular hot dogs.Copy !req
294. Look at these guns!Copy !req
295. I just pooped a little bit.Copy !req
296. - Meatwad, hit the switch.
- OK.Copy !req
297. - Is it on?
- Hit it again.Copy !req
298. Can't get good help these days.Copy !req
299. - Jiggle it.
- Do exactly what he told you!Copy !req
300. It's just one switch! I'm doing it.Copy !req
301. Well that's it. You see this M?Copy !req
302. It probably stands for motherboard,
and evidently we're missing it.Copy !req
303. It stands for Meatwad.
And that's me, y'all.Copy !req
304. It stands for mar...Copy !req
305. for mar... morphin...Copy !req
306. I will come up with something.
And it will sting like the bee!Copy !req
307. Wait a minute.
Is that the box it came in?Copy !req
308. No. What am I, on trial here?Copy !req
309. - Where did you get this?
- I got it from a dear friend...Copy !req
310. who knows my needs.Copy !req
311. And he also happens
to wear bitchin' ass pants!Copy !req
312. You see, they're made
of a fiber optic technology...Copy !req
313. that hug the flesh on my unique shape.Copy !req
314. They circulate air
around my genitals...Copy !req
315. and they wick the sweat
off my balls.Copy !req
316. You wanna know more about my pants,
I got some literature here...Copy !req
317. That's alright. I just need to know
where you got that Insanoflex?Copy !req
318. Some garage sale. Back when I,
you know, gave a crap about my body.Copy !req
319. Then of course some
jack off friggin' ripped it off.Copy !req
320. Will you speed it up?
What is the hold-up back there?Copy !req
321. Well, Shake says
you gave it to him for Christmas.Copy !req
322. Is that where it is?Copy !req
323. Yeah, I thought Santa Claus came in here,
and busted out my window.Copy !req
324. Look, I know it's yours...Copy !req
325. but we're missing a key part
that makes it work.Copy !req
326. Well, boo hoo, for you.
So go cry in the street off my property.Copy !req
327. Well, what we were thinking
is that if we could just...Copy !req
328. go inside your house and look around.
- See, I'd love to do that, but no.Copy !req
329. You're not coming in here.Copy !req
330. Can you tell me who you bought it from,
and I can go ask that guy if he still has it?Copy !req
331. - Here's the address. Right here on the box.
- What the he...?Copy !req
332. Why are we stopping
when my foot is clearly still on the gas?Copy !req
333. South Jersey Shore.
I know where that is.Copy !req
334. Alright, hop in. Warp speed. Go!Copy !req
335. We overshot that.Copy !req
336. We went all around the earth
and back to where we started.Copy !req
337. It's pretty amazing isn't it?Copy !req
338. - OK, impulse power!
- Let's take the cart.Copy !req
339. - Wait, wait, wait, stop! Stop!
- What? What is it?Copy !req
340. Must've just been the wind.Copy !req
341. There it is. In all its beauty.Copy !req
342. Oh man. The door's locked.Copy !req
343. Hand me a credit card.Copy !req
344. Dude, you can't pick the lock,
man, I know you.Copy !req
345. I know, I want to order some DVDs online.Copy !req
346. This has been a complete
intelligence failure of massive proportions!Copy !req
347. Will you see if they have
Deathdream by Bob Clark?Copy !req
348. - Did he not do Porky's?
- He did do Porky's.Copy !req
349. He also did A Christmas Story,
which makes me laugh and laugh.Copy !req
350. Dude, they got a key.Copy !req
351. It's right there under the...Copy !req
352. Well, it's hanging
on that nail by the door.Copy !req
353. - We were never here.
- You never saw us.Copy !req
354. I told you dude, we needed the Machine!Copy !req
355. - How many times did I say that?
- Zero. You said it none times.Copy !req
356. - What?
- Hey, sweaty man.Copy !req
357. - Could you help us lift something?
- No, I don't think so.Copy !req
358. - Damn it!
- Rude!Copy !req
359. What difference does it make?
The friggin thing don't work!Copy !req
360. - They're missing a piece.
- Where is it?Copy !req
361. That's right, fat man.
I will totally ruin your bushes.Copy !req
362. Please don't do that.
It's about to bloom!Copy !req
363. I've been urinating it twice a day!Copy !req
364. I forgot it did this.Copy !req
365. Now tell me fat man, and make it quick...Copy !req
366. what was I going to ask you?Copy !req
367. Check it out. I mean, here's the box for it.Copy !req
368. And here's the address.Copy !req
369. Come on, let's go!
Everybody inside the race car!Copy !req
370. Wait for me!Copy !req
371. - Thrusters on!
- Go!Copy !req
372. - Is your seat belt properly fastened?
- Yeah.Copy !req
373. Dude, why don't we just take our ship?
It's probably faster.Copy !req
374. Yes, to the ship!
It was my idea.Copy !req
375. Goodbye fat man.Copy !req
376. You can suck it!Copy !req
377. - Steve, heat the oil!
- OK.Copy !req
378. And now...Copy !req
379. shoestring the giant potato!Copy !req
380. The oil is ready!Copy !req
381. Lower the box!Copy !req
382. No!Copy !req
383. - No!
- I know!Copy !req
384. He's been trying to kill us
for the last three miles.Copy !req
385. Listen up, there is
no right on red in this State!Copy !req
386. It's left, goddamn you!Copy !req
387. Do you even know the difference?Copy !req
388. Here we are.Copy !req
389. Obviously this is the kitchen.Copy !req
390. All modern appliances, brushed metal.
All brand new.Copy !req
391. What's this do?
Hey, what's that do?Copy !req
392. Don't you ever touch people's stuff!
What kind of manners do you have?Copy !req
393. You know I touch the stuff first.Copy !req
394. And if you look over here...Copy !req
395. - What is this, a creature in here?
- Yes, that.Copy !req
396. That's a creaturezoid!
There are only two in the known universe!Copy !req
397. Taunt it and it will eat your skin!Copy !req
398. This is my... wife.Copy !req
399. OK, well, I guess we're gonna go on
and get on out your hair, here.Copy !req
400. Out of curiosity, you don't happen to have
a missing piece to an exercise machine...Copy !req
401. Nope! Can't help you there. Sorry.Copy !req
402. Come on and get me. What's the matter?Copy !req
403. Too faggoty to come and get me?Copy !req
404. Come on, Shake!Copy !req
405. - I'm so sick of pussies.
- Drag me out of here, come on!Copy !req
406. - I am a master of disguise!
- Yeah.Copy !req
407. Well, they were here, looking for the part.Copy !req
408. No one must ever
put together the Insanoflex!Copy !req
409. - Well, he doesn't have it.
- We'll just wait...Copy !req
410. Thousands of years ago
I told you he didn't have it.Copy !req
411. Why are we beating
our brains out about this?Copy !req
412. I mean, come on, dudes!Copy !req
413. We'll just wait until we create it,
and then like, we'll have it!Copy !req
414. Well, alright.Copy !req
415. Man, nobody's gonna take
these voice oscillators back.Copy !req
416. - Well, I will try anyway.
- I think I even swallowed the tag.Copy !req
417. - Do you have the receipt?
- I prefer to keep mine in my butt.Copy !req
418. Oh no! Someone's coming!
Put on your costumes.Copy !req
419. Oh, sheisse!Copy !req
420. Everybody, make out and kiss hard!
Like you mean it!Copy !req
421. Get a room!Copy !req
422. Did you hear me say, "Get a room?"
I told them to get a room.Copy !req
423. They were like making out
then we walked by and I went...Copy !req
424. "Get a room!"
That's pretty good, right?Copy !req
425. OK, they're gone.Copy !req
426. - That was very close.
- Yeah. We were.Copy !req
427. Very close.Copy !req
428. You know, you're a good kisser.Copy !req
429. OK, they're gone, OK?Copy !req
430. I'll handle this.Copy !req
431. Yes, can I help you?Copy !req
432. Yeah, we're here
with the Boys Club and...Copy !req
433. We're here to throw down!Copy !req
434. Four eyes!
I need those combinations!Copy !req
435. - What are you talking about?
- You know, like missile codes right away!Copy !req
436. Shake! Shake!Copy !req
437. There won't be a tomorrow, Jack.
Let alone your little grandma...Copy !req
438. - OK, I give! I give!
- You're going down, milkshake!Copy !req
439. I give up!
I'm not even fighting you back!Copy !req
440. All you had to do was ask!Copy !req
441. - Missile codes? We don't need these!
- Well, I need them.Copy !req
442. We are a go for operation
Banana Monkey...Copy !req
443. 029 Yankee Hotel Foxtrot.Copy !req
444. Launch pad one, launch pad two,
launch pad three.Copy !req
445. We have ignition.Copy !req
446. I am just... I am smelling a missile.Copy !req
447. Nah, there's no way!Copy !req
448. Greetings, I'm Space...Copy !req
449. Shut up, honey. It's just fire.Copy !req
450. Say, you wouldn't happen to have a...Copy !req
451. I already told you,
we don't have that part you're looking for!Copy !req
452. What do you mean you already told us?Copy !req
453. Well yeah, just a few minutes ago,
when you were here.Copy !req
454. The thing for the exercise equipment,
we don't have it.Copy !req
455. Sir, you must turn your key,
we are at Defcon 3.Copy !req
456. Turn your key, sir.Copy !req
457. Who's that?Copy !req
458. - That's my wife.
- OK, look.Copy !req
459. If you see anything that looks like this,
let us know.Copy !req
460. - Wait a second. Can we have this?
- Meatwad, let me see that.Copy !req
461. My God, this is the missing piece!Copy !req
462. - Knock-knock!
- Welcome home, baby.Copy !req
463. I say this to all of your things.
For this is a robbery.Copy !req
464. - Nobody move!
- Yeah, we'll see you guys later.Copy !req
465. Stop moving!Copy !req
466. - They're gone, man.
- Yes, Err.Copy !req
467. We scared them off
with our fierce ferocity.Copy !req
468. Do what he says
and say what he does, and...Copy !req
469. look at this!Copy !req
470. - This is ours!
- That is correct.Copy !req
471. What is it? No time for an answer!
Tractor beam on!Copy !req
472. Observe as I steal it!Copy !req
473. Do not waste your pathetic mortal energy
trying to stop us...Copy !req
474. unless you want to amuse us,
which is what you're doing.Copy !req
475. You can't stop us, you can't touch us!Copy !req
476. We're untouchable, unstoppable,
unflappable, unmotivated...Copy !req
477. What is that, Err?Copy !req
478. - This is an ashtray!
- What the f...?Copy !req
479. - I like to smoke.
- Tractor beam off!Copy !req
480. - An ashtray? Come on, man.
- What's wrong with an ashtray?Copy !req
481. Err, if you want to achieve in this life...Copy !req
482. you need to set your goals higher.Copy !req
483. - I'm already pretty high!
- And so am I.Copy !req
484. - So grab the other end of this...
- Yes!Copy !req
485. as we commit first degree
Grand Theft Coffee Table!Copy !req
486. - Tractor beam on!
- We are stealing!Copy !req
487. We control your home furnishings!Copy !req
488. And we will be back
when you least expect it.Copy !req
489. We will!Copy !req
490. For the end table,
the ottoman, and the wine rack.Copy !req
491. See if we don't!Copy !req
492. - But we don't have room right now.
- We are renting at the Y!Copy !req
493. - What's wrong with your chicken?
- That's a gay chicken.Copy !req
494. The piece is missing!Copy !req
495. - Oh, no!
- Oh, yes, Steve!Copy !req
496. Randy!
Turn your fucking stereo down!Copy !req
497. Did you see
that chicken guy running around?Copy !req
498. - That guy was weird.
- Yeah. Really weird.Copy !req
499. There was something
about that chicken.Copy !req
500. Something that reminded me
of another weird person I used to know.Copy !req
501. Yeah, it was many years ago.Copy !req
502. We were colleagues once,
we were very close.Copy !req
503. I was just starting in my scientific career
and he was already...Copy !req
504. OK, all right, you went to camp,
you made out with a girl, Vietnam, what?Copy !req
505. What? I've got stories too,
I've been places, I have friends.Copy !req
506. But right now I need to get physical.
And listening ain't doing it for me.Copy !req
507. All right, give me the damn piece.
Let's see if it fits.Copy !req
508. It looks like they have the piece.Copy !req
509. Then they must have the piece.Copy !req
510. - That's what I just said.
- Shush, Emory! The robot is right.Copy !req
511. Someone must distract them,
while I go in there and beat it out of them!Copy !req
512. - Now who's had that fantasy?
- I got an idea.Copy !req
513. Why don't we just send wingnut over here
to freakin' bore them to death.Copy !req
514. I have a thousand weapons
of mass distraction.Copy !req
515. Which one shall you require?Copy !req
516. What about the student council story?Copy !req
517. - That one's a corker.
- Oh, yes.Copy !req
518. The student council story.
That is one of my very favorites.Copy !req
519. Thousands of years ago
I ran for treasurer of student council...Copy !req
520. it involved a lot of hard work...Copy !req
521. we decorated many cookies...Copy !req
522. we spent all night
putting up cream frosting.Copy !req
523. And then we drew on many posters.Copy !req
524. But the principal called me
down to her office...Copy !req
525. and informed me
that I had violated election rules.Copy !req
526. Thousands of years ago I kicked your ass.
And I'm gonna do it again right now.Copy !req
527. That's what Sister Margaret
kept telling me...Copy !req
528. as I explained my political agenda
in her bathroom.Copy !req
529. Where are my frickin' pants?Copy !req
530. You can't hide 'em, I see 'em!Copy !req
531. I see 'em!Copy !req
532. Carl!Copy !req
533. I wanna share with you...Copy !req
534. by letting you jump on in here
and take the other leg.Copy !req
535. - No, thank you. Save it for the tea party.
- Come on.Copy !req
536. Our balls will wick together as one!Copy !req
537. That's my workout machine, isn't it?Copy !req
538. Yeah, we found that missing piece, Carl.Copy !req
539. I don't want to tell you what to do, but...Copy !req
540. you're putting it in upside down.Copy !req
541. Will you back up? I know what I'm doing.Copy !req
542. Well fine, do it your wrong way.Copy !req
543. - All right, here we go.
- There you go.Copy !req
544. - Finally!
- Excuse you?Copy !req
545. Set it to maximum!
I'll have to start maxing out right here.Copy !req
546. No, I bought it, I get first crack at it!Copy !req
547. - I'm doing it.
- I'm the one who just put it together!Copy !req
548. - I'm the muscle one!
- Shake, will you let Carl go first?Copy !req
549. - I mean, he does own the damn thing!
- You're right, Frylock.Copy !req
550. I will be the bigger man,
and let the baby have his way.Copy !req
551. Turn it on now! Get a mirror!
Hurry! Someone spot me!Copy !req
552. Get your ass out of there!Copy !req
553. All right.Copy !req
554. All right, put it on warm-up mode.Copy !req
555. I want to work into this very slowly
before I completely dominate it, OK?Copy !req
556. Look at this whole routine,
this is pretty sweet there.Copy !req
557. What the hell?Copy !req
558. What's going on here?Copy !req
559. Am I exercising, or?Copy !req
560. Seriously,
what is going on behind me here?Copy !req
561. Crap, crap, crap, crap!Copy !req
562. What the fuck is going on
with this thing?Copy !req
563. Man! I'm glad he went first.Copy !req
564. - I told you it mustn't be installed!
- No you didn't!Copy !req
565. - I didn't?
- No, you didn't.Copy !req
566. I meant to!Copy !req
567. Make it stop, I'm already sore here!Copy !req
568. - Oh, sheisse!
- Dude, just stay down.Copy !req
569. The re... the res... the reasoning...Copy !req
570. The resoning must begin at once!Copy !req
571. Neil!Copy !req
572. Contact the county!Copy !req
573. Hang on, wait. What are we doing?Copy !req
574. Do I have to explain
everything to you, Neil?Copy !req
575. Hey, y'all!Copy !req
576. They got a big ol'
floating watermelon over here!Copy !req
577. Reverse thrusters!Copy !req
578. Just a couple more reps man, let's go!Copy !req
579. No pain, no gain! Come on!Copy !req
580. I wanna see you go for it! You got it!Copy !req
581. You don't wanna
look like that forever, do you?Copy !req
582. - Crap! It's heading downtown.
- What, the watermelon?Copy !req
583. No, not the watermelon!Copy !req
584. There's only one way to stop it.Copy !req
585. You must push...Copy !req
586. the stop switch.Copy !req
587. It doesn't have a stop switch!Copy !req
588. Well...Copy !req
589. I...Copy !req
590. Then there's no way to stop it!Copy !req
591. - What the f...? You don't know!
- Is that clock right?Copy !req
592. - My goodness, is it that time already?
- Man, it has been a day!Copy !req
593. I tell you what, I mean...Copy !req
594. I been going non-stop
since like noon, or something.Copy !req
595. I got to go, I got to go to bed.Copy !req
596. - Shake.
- And you got school tomorrow too!Copy !req
597. - No I don't.
- Yes you do, and you will now go to bed.Copy !req
598. Shake, don't you get it?Copy !req
599. Why don't you get this
with your lips!Copy !req
600. I'm referring to my anus.Copy !req
601. Carl's gonna be destroyed,
along with all the rest of downtown!Copy !req
602. If we help you,
can we get the machine?Copy !req
603. Or can we go to the?Copy !req
604. - Or what!
- I don't know!Copy !req
605. You don't have to yell at me like that!Copy !req
606. Look.Copy !req
607. We need a plan.Copy !req
608. I have a plan.Copy !req
609. Alright, you see
that roller coaster over there?Copy !req
610. It's the Steel Python,
and in order to ride it...Copy !req
611. we must each purchase tickets...Copy !req
612. at $3 a pop...Copy !req
613. with your money...Copy !req
614. in order to ride it.Copy !req
615. And that there's the plan.Copy !req
616. What about the Insanoflex?Copy !req
617. Insan...
No, that thing's gone, brother.Copy !req
618. And pretty soon,
the world as we know it will be gone.Copy !req
619. That's why you gotta you squeeze as much
out of the time you got left on this earth.Copy !req
620. And squeeze it for fun.Copy !req
621. He's right.Copy !req
622. - Will you two cut it out?
- Word up, bitch.Copy !req
623. Eat that, motherfuckers!Copy !req
624. - Now here's dessert!
- What the hell are you doing here?Copy !req
625. That sort of snippy attitude
does not require an answer.Copy !req
626. He's right.
You wanna buy a coffee table, man?Copy !req
627. Notice the fine lacquered oak.Copy !req
628. Four legs!
Top, bottom, underneath, sides.Copy !req
629. It would complement
the inside of your anus beautifully.Copy !req
630. - Get it, man?
- Do you get the double entendre?Copy !req
631. - Up your butt!
- Do you know what an anus is?Copy !req
632. Up your butt! Sideways!Copy !req
633. Look, we just really
want to ride this coaster, so...Copy !req
634. you know, be cool and...
give us all your money.Copy !req
635. Total destruction
and devastation is imminent.Copy !req
636. And it takes a long time.Copy !req
637. About an hour,
hour and a half from now.Copy !req
638. - Or two!
- And it will suck.Copy !req
639. Wait, stop moving!Copy !req
640. Is it just me, man, or is that thing
coming right towards us?Copy !req
641. - Yeah, look at it.
- Man, I gotta get out of here.Copy !req
642. - Run.
- It's coming right towards us!Copy !req
643. I'm sorry, this plan is moronic!Copy !req
644. The Insanoflex
is ripping up my home town.Copy !req
645. And you're sitting here
not even tall enough to ride!Copy !req
646. Now we have to fund your operation!Copy !req
647. Come on gang.
Let's all do a topless car wash!Copy !req
648. I'm tall enough to ride now.Copy !req
649. Meatwad!
I didn't know you could do that.Copy !req
650. Ain't no one ever asked me.
You want you some office space?Copy !req
651. How 'bout tech support?Copy !req
652. Wait a minute, this gives me an idea!Copy !req
653. Is it the same idea I had?
About riding that there roller coaster?Copy !req
654. I hope so.Copy !req
655. Pre... tty bad... ass!Copy !req
656. I like the missiles, that works.
You need to mess up the hair more.Copy !req
657. - I just combed it.
- Look more like a monster.Copy !req
658. I like parting it to the side
but giving it a messy look.Copy !req
659. Like he's a preppy
but he'll throw down with you.Copy !req
660. Lose the shorts, though.
This ain't no Pride Parade, it's a fight.Copy !req
661. Well, how about this?
See? Blue jean shorts.Copy !req
662. - Cutoffs.
- OK, fine, that'll work.Copy !req
663. Now Oglethorpe and Emory,
I want you two to...Copy !req
664. Where'd the Plutonians go?Copy !req
665. Hold your hands up this time.Copy !req
666. That is a direct order
from Commander Fun.Copy !req
667. Hold on, hold on!Copy !req
668. Oh God!Copy !req
669. Alright, Shake.
The Meat Monster is set up.Copy !req
670. You need to lure that thing down this alley,
so Meatwad can attack him.Copy !req
671. - Shake?
- I ain't doing that. No.Copy !req
672. - No, no. Hell no.
- Stay right there!Copy !req
673. What are you do...? You must
lure that thing into the Meat Monster!Copy !req
674. Well, what the hell
do you think I'm doing here? My nails?Copy !req
675. - I may?
- Fine!Copy !req
676. - I'll get Robot Man here to do it.
- I don't want to do it.Copy !req
677. My hands are tied at this point.Copy !req
678. I kind of also got
a teeth whitening package.Copy !req
679. So, you know...Copy !req
680. don't stay up.Copy !req
681. Meet us out there as soon as you're done.Copy !req
682. - Oh, crap!
- OK, just close the door, please?Copy !req
683. Alright, Carl!
Looking good!Copy !req
684. What are you... Wha...Copy !req
685. See you later!Copy !req
686. What the hell are you doing?
You were supposed to attack him!Copy !req
687. With your fangs! And then
blow him up with the meat missiles!Copy !req
688. - I forgot.
- It's too late now.Copy !req
689. I've been to the future and it's his destiny.Copy !req
690. - Their destiny.
- Wait a second.Copy !req
691. What do you mean by their destiny?Copy !req
692. Frylock, look at this!Copy !req
693. Oh, my God!Copy !req
694. Do you know what this means?Copy !req
695. It's just as I suspected.Copy !req
696. I'm female.Copy !req
697. - It's... it's female.
- You're what?Copy !req
698. I mean, the Insanoflex is a female.Copy !req
699. And it's pregnant.Copy !req
700. Wait, go back to the other part.Copy !req
701. Where you were saying
you were a woman?Copy !req
702. He's right.Copy !req
703. Thousands of years ago into the future...Copy !req
704. descendants of the original Insanoflex
will roam the earth...Copy !req
705. exercising alternating muscles
on alternating days...Copy !req
706. until the human race
has cut carbohydrates...Copy !req
707. out of their diet forever.Copy !req
708. And everything will be crushed...Copy !req
709. in the Yeast Uprising of 1987.Copy !req
710. You said you're a woman!Copy !req
711. - Well, I'm not. Look, Shake...
- Don't touch me.Copy !req
712. Will someone just grab
the other end of that egg, please?Copy !req
713. Well with my teeth the way they are...Copy !req
714. I'm kind of not supposed
to chew anything for like four hours.Copy !req
715. Pick this egg up now!Copy !req
716. But my teeth have just been whitened!Copy !req
717. These teeth here,
they make for a pretty good stool.Copy !req
718. - You know you're sittin' on my teeth?
- I need to get eye level with the TV.Copy !req
719. - I see that.
- And then I need to wear these teeth.Copy !req
720. In my mouth.
When I go on dates.Copy !req
721. With women of the opposite sex.Copy !req
722. They're not clothes, you know.
They're part of my body!Copy !req
723. Get your ass off my teeth!Copy !req
724. Look at this.
This is unbelievable!Copy !req
725. I know it! My tan fell off.Copy !req
726. $49, straight down the crapper!Copy !req
727. With this Ultra X-Ray,
I should be able to look inside...Copy !req
728. Why don't you just break it open, like this.
With my Ultra Foot.Copy !req
729. OK, once I get the Ultra X-Ray
completely calibrated...Copy !req
730. I should be able to configure...Copy !req
731. See? I get shit done.Copy !req
732. - Damn, that's a good beat!
- Yeah, Meatwad, it is.Copy !req
733. Almost too good.Copy !req
734. - What is this music?
- Well, it's from my exercise video.Copy !req
735. Lose Weight! Eviscerate!
Volume 2 - Sea Of Blood, Island Of Death.Copy !req
736. I think I want to see that video.Copy !req
737. You'd better run, boy!Copy !req
738. Run those pounds off.Copy !req
739. See, this is an exercise program
designed to keep you working out.Copy !req
740. You know,
24 hours a day for 30 days...Copy !req
741. until, you know, forever.Copy !req
742. Yeah, but...Copy !req
743. You're guaranteed
to lose weight that way.Copy !req
744. - What the?
- Or that way.Copy !req
745. The way where he blows
your head off with a laser.Copy !req
746. - Who blows your head off with a laser?
- Him, right there.Copy !req
747. That's the Insanoflex.Copy !req
748. That sucker's crazy.Copy !req
749. - We got one of them, don't we?
- Yeah!Copy !req
750. Remember? You were supposed
to wrap yourself around him?Copy !req
751. Well I'll be.
Where has my head been?Copy !req
752. Has any of these people
ever stopped the Insanoflex?Copy !req
753. No. It can't be stopped,
once it gets going with that music!Copy !req
754. See, that's what fuels its insane rage.Copy !req
755. Maybe if we could change the music...Copy !req
756. we could confuse the Insanoflex.Copy !req
757. Well, I'll be.
That'd probably do it.Copy !req
758. - Does anyone know any musicians?
- My demo tape!Copy !req
759. Have you gotten a copy of it?Copy !req
760. Does anyone know
any other musicians?Copy !req
761. Alright, I'll just take
a little five minute break.Copy !req
762. - Again! I want Candy, again!
- Alright, man! Shit man!Copy !req
763. I want candy, bubblegum and taffy.
However you fucking do it!Copy !req
764. Put the flames away! It's fine!Copy !req
765. Chill for a second, man.
I gotta take this, man.Copy !req
766. - What's up?
- I can't...Copy !req
767. I can't hear you, you're breaking up.Copy !req
768. Satan can I take this up to the surface?
I ain't gettin' no reception, like none, man!Copy !req
769. On one condition.Copy !req
770. - What's up? You call me?
- Yeah, I guess we did, huh Meatwad?Copy !req
771. You tryin' to get you
some fly honeys? 'Cause...Copy !req
772. - 'Cause you're a fly.
- Man! For real?Copy !req
773. Motherfucker changed me again,
didn't he?Copy !req
774. Didn't he? That motherfucker!
Satan is a motherfucker!Copy !req
775. - Hey man, you gonna eat that?
- Well that there's a dog turd.Copy !req
776. Man! I love me some dog turd, man!Copy !req
777. This shit's delicious!Copy !req
778. Why the hell do I like me
some dog turd, man?Copy !req
779. Look, no no, don't get up.
You keep on eating.Copy !req
780. I... I need you to do
one of your ridiculous songs.Copy !req
781. Now you need me?Copy !req
782. Man, the world has turned, man!
Look here, man.Copy !req
783. I don't have time to do you a song, man!Copy !req
784. You need me so bad,
you got to go to my website, man.Copy !req
785. - Click on "Contact MC", man!
- I knew it.Copy !req
786. Forget this!
I don't have time for this bullshit.Copy !req
787. You got a complaint?
Go to the message boards.Copy !req
788. Tell your friends, your family, people
you don't like, I'll do anything for attention!Copy !req
789. Alright, we need you to write a rap...Copy !req
790. so we can put it into the Insanoflex
and make him stop exercising...Copy !req
791. and destroying downtown...Copy !req
792. where they got the mini golf course
that I like so much.Copy !req
793. I got this man, check it out!Copy !req
794. Yeah, you feel this?Copy !req
795. This beat's from Europe. Man!Copy !req
796. I'm gonna lay it down for ya.Copy !req
797. No!Copy !req
798. - No!
- Yes!Copy !req
799. - Gross! Get it off me!
- Look. We need a real musician.Copy !req
800. - I still got my demo floatin' out there!
- You don't wanna hear that, come on!Copy !req
801. The solo acoustic stuff I did?Copy !req
802. You know,
about that girlfriend I never had?Copy !req
803. - That's beyond suck.
- Solid and funk free.Copy !req
804. - But can you dance to it?
- Sure. If you pay for it.Copy !req
805. - It's Carl!
- Come... get... me.Copy !req
806. I'm... at... the... amusement... park.Copy !req
807. Steel Python.Copy !req
808. - Grab your tape, we'll have to go with it!
- Let's go with you gettin' 12 bucks.Copy !req
809. Or you know, you could go 15 for the CD.
You've got digital quality.Copy !req
810. - It sounds like I'm in the room with you.
- Will you come on?Copy !req
811. My Frydar is picking
up slower biorhythms.Copy !req
812. - You gotta do it close range, huh?
- Must be in cool-down mode.Copy !req
813. Yeah, my Strawdar
picked that up about 20 miles back.Copy !req
814. Hey, dudes!Copy !req
815. Look at us up here
on the roller coaster!Copy !req
816. Hey guys!
What's going on?Copy !req
817. What's wrong with him?Copy !req
818. - Look out down there!
- My nutrients!Copy !req
819. Retrieve them at once,
they have escaped!Copy !req
820. That came out of you?Copy !req
821. Alright everyone.
Here's what we're gonna do.Copy !req
822. - Man! What happened?
- Dang it.Copy !req
823. - Great, and now what?
- I'm gonna fly up there...Copy !req
824. and blow them all up
because I am sick of this shit!Copy !req
825. - No!
- Wait, Frylock!Copy !req
826. So you're just gonna go up there
and blow up your neighbor Carl?Copy !req
827. Don't you understand
how much he has to live for?Copy !req
828. OK, now that you're looking at me,
I mean...Copy !req
829. I'll come up with something here,
give me a second.Copy !req
830. He's...Copy !req
831. Hang on.Copy !req
832. Well, he's got...Copy !req
833. porn!
He's got a bunch of porn.Copy !req
834. Who'll take care
of his vast collection of pornography...Copy !req
835. both in VHS and DVD format?Copy !req
836. Who's gonna call his mom,
and pretend he ain't lookin' at porn...Copy !req
837. while he's talking to her on the phone?Copy !req
838. And who, answer me this...Copy !req
839. will clean his pool
after I have peed all in it?Copy !req
840. - You.
- That's my point. Go kill him.Copy !req
841. - Alright, alright.
- Hell!Copy !req
842. I wrote this next one
when I broke up with my girlfriend...Copy !req
843. 'cause I slept with her friend
and dumped them both!Copy !req
844. Shake, get your ass down from there!Copy !req
845. And I think everyone
can relate to the blues.Copy !req
846. Like they had
after I dropped them like two hot rocks.Copy !req
847. It's working.
It's working! He's stopping!Copy !req
848. Keep playing, Shake!
Keep playing your dumb ass song!Copy !req
849. Wait, hang on, I've got trouble with the G.Copy !req
850. Perfect!
It's all going according to plan.Copy !req
851. Neil, prepare the fruit pod!Copy !req
852. - It is making my ears pop.
- It's got a good message.Copy !req
853. He's touching
on some real stuff there.Copy !req
854. I like the nude part.Copy !req
855. Thank God!Copy !req
856. He was strong, but I think
we learned that music is stronger.Copy !req
857. - Carl, I want you to hop on out of there.
- I'm a little sore here...Copy !req
858. so, if you don't mind,
no one try to save me right now.Copy !req
859. Just let me sit here and...Copy !req
860. look damn good for a little bit, OK?Copy !req
861. - The music has freed your soul.
- Get off, Shake, get off!Copy !req
862. No!Copy !req
863. - Carl?
- Oh my God. Carl?Copy !req
864. - Is he dead?
- Carl, you all right? Can you hear me?Copy !req
865. Carl? Hey, Carl?Copy !req
866. Carl!Copy !req
867. You OK? There?Copy !req
868. What happened to him?Copy !req
869. Baby, you showed up! Great.Copy !req
870. Sorry, I didn't introduce you guys,
this is my new friend.Copy !req
871. - Linda.
- How y'all doin'?Copy !req
872. - Hello.
- Hey, man.Copy !req
873. Hi, how's it going?Copy !req
874. Yeah, we met in line for the coaster.Copy !req
875. We compared our lats and our traps and...Copy !req
876. turns out we do a lot of the same
exercises, don't we baby?Copy !req
877. The two of us were thinking about going
out for some vitamin supplements and...Copy !req
878. inject ourselves
with some extract from a bull's semen.Copy !req
879. That's what she likes
to do for muscle mass there.Copy !req
880. - Anyone wanna come?
- No.Copy !req
881. - Nah, that's cool.
- No, I can't.Copy !req
882. See ya later, losers.
I'm going off to do another little workout.Copy !req
883. At her place! Yeah!Copy !req
884. The only thing
that bull semen did for me...Copy !req
885. was activate my gag reflex.Copy !req
886. Well Carl got himself a girlfriend.Copy !req
887. I'm proud of him.
And I'm Ionely. I want a girlfriend.Copy !req
888. - I'm the one who wants a girlfriend!
- No, it is I who wants a girlfriend.Copy !req
889. - Get this thing going again.
- I'll tell y'all what.Copy !req
890. See all these eggs laying around here?
Why don't you just pick one out.Copy !req
891. Pretty soon they're all gonna hatch
and once they do...Copy !req
892. life as we know it, is over.Copy !req
893. You know, you're really great
at taking a good fun situation...Copy !req
894. and turn it into something crappy.Copy !req
895. You know
we're about to get laid here, right?Copy !req
896. - How we gonna stop all of them?
- Well, why don't you ask him?Copy !req
897. Because he invented it.Copy !req
898. I did mention that, right?
I think I mentioned that.Copy !req
899. - So you're the one that created this thing?
- I think so. He says I did.Copy !req
900. I'll probably just knock it out
this afternoon.Copy !req
901. - Let's just wait around.
- He won't.Copy !req
902. He has no discipline.Copy !req
903. Why don't you tell a story about it
that lasts five hours?Copy !req
904. Will you shut up?Copy !req
905. I have an idea.Copy !req
906. We're gonna have to go back in time.Copy !req
907. - And kill his parents.
- No!Copy !req
908. Don't do that, they're in Florida!Copy !req
909. No, no, Shake.
Here's what we're gonna do.Copy !req
910. Come on, how often
do you see them anyway? Honestly?Copy !req
911. Hey guys? Hello?Copy !req
912. Don't walk away
or I shall help me for you!Copy !req
913. Look man, I'm here for you, it's OK.
Now, what I want you to do...Copy !req
914. is drink this.Copy !req
915. Thank you Err.
What was that thick shake?Copy !req
916. Well, I'll tell you what it is.
It's mayonnaise I found in the trash can.Copy !req
917. And it had hair on it!
And you drank it!Copy !req
918. Because I am your doctor.
Do what I say!Copy !req
919. Look.Copy !req
920. Yet again, another testament of my ability
to pound the brewskies.Copy !req
921. Yeah. Those are collecting fruit flies.Copy !req
922. They are hovering around the display.
They are in awe of my ability to drink.Copy !req
923. Dude, you remember that exam?
That's tomorrow?Copy !req
924. - 'Cause, were you gonna study for it or?
- I sold my books.Copy !req
925. Screw them, man!
Plus, books are for nerds.Copy !req
926. Well, maybe you should save
some of that book money for laundry...Copy !req
927. 'cause your sheets
are getting pretty gross man.Copy !req
928. What sheets?
I don't have sheets.Copy !req
929. Maybe we should throw them away.Copy !req
930. Dude, I'm so glad the computer
hooked us up as roommates.Copy !req
931. We are friends forever, you and I.Copy !req
932. Yep.Copy !req
933. I'm pretty psyched about it.Copy !req
934. Sheisse, the RA!Copy !req
935. S'up bro?
Wanna hackey-sack?Copy !req
936. Can we just kill him?Copy !req
937. Yeah, do it, seriously,
'cause I get straight A's if he gets killed.Copy !req
938. Remedial Verbs.
You're studying that?Copy !req
939. I say speak to the hand to that class.Copy !req
940. I'm not getting up at eleven in the morning!Copy !req
941. To create that Insanoflex
you would've had to have...Copy !req
942. an advanced knowledge
of biogenetics and robot hydro-rhythms.Copy !req
943. Do you, or?Copy !req
944. See, I learned
how to help Timmy find his nuts.Copy !req
945. Please let me kill him.Copy !req
946. Oh, no. My clothes
didn't make it through the time rift!Copy !req
947. I'm totally nude.Copy !req
948. Nice going.
You saved the future.Copy !req
949. - You told me he invented this!
- I will. I know, I do.Copy !req
950. Did you even study robotics in school?
You didn't, did you?Copy !req
951. No way!
He majored in pottery, man.Copy !req
952. Well, is there...
is there like a giant pot...Copy !req
953. that destroys the world
that I might have glazed?Copy !req
954. You can stare at my genitals.Copy !req
955. You totally didn't save the future!Copy !req
956. My vacation is ruined!Copy !req
957. Well then,
who did create the damn thing?Copy !req
958. - Well, I guess I don't know.
- No you don't. You don't know shit.Copy !req
959. "Thousands of Years Ago."
You randomly string words together...Copy !req
960. that make up ridiculous stories of things
that never happened and never will!Copy !req
961. Really? Well then,
what do you make of this?Copy !req
962. "I can feel it coming in the air tonight."Copy !req
963. "I've been waiting
for this moment all my life."Copy !req
964. My father?Copy !req
965. Yes, no, yes.Copy !req
966. Your father.Copy !req
967. Oh my god!
You don't, you don't mean...Copy !req
968. Yes.Copy !req
969. - Thousands of years ago...
- No, no.Copy !req
970. I know who you're talking about.
Don't worry about it.Copy !req
971. - Look, a caterpillar!
- Oh, wait.Copy !req
972. - Where?
- Where's this caterpillar?Copy !req
973. - Just keep looking. Come on, let's go.
- Now I see it.Copy !req
974. Hello, little caterpillar!Copy !req
975. Destroy him!Copy !req
976. - You never told me we got us a daddy?
- You don't remember?Copy !req
977. - Do I remember anything?
- I got your daddy right here.Copy !req
978. He's only got one eye,
and two little uncles for ya too.Copy !req
979. It was a long time ago...Copy !req
980. Did ya hear me?Copy !req
981. I said I got your daddy right here
and I pointed at myself?Copy !req
982. I thought it was only a dream,
but it was a nightmare.Copy !req
983. It was dark, I couldn't see anything.Copy !req
984. But I do remember the painful sting
of hot oil against my skin.Copy !req
985. The hum.Copy !req
986. The hum of some type
of enormous mixer.Copy !req
987. And the wet slap
of steel hands on raw meat.Copy !req
988. How you doin'?Copy !req
989. The shriek of a million chickens,
screaming in agony...Copy !req
990. as they were merged into one.Copy !req
991. Right on, yeah!Copy !req
992. We were each given part of his brain,
and they brought us to life.Copy !req
993. But he was never the same.Copy !req
994. - There we go.
- Did I get some brain?Copy !req
995. - Sort of.
- I know I did. I can feel it.Copy !req
996. Well...Copy !req
997. - He said it would sort of compensate.
- Guys, down here.Copy !req
998. How did I compen... template?Copy !req
999. What about me?Copy !req
1000. Fuck it!Copy !req
1001. - I got head cheese?
- All right...Copy !req
1002. some of us got brain,
but that's not important, OK?Copy !req
1003. - That was a very good story.
- Well, it's not done.Copy !req
1004. My turn. Once upon a time,
there was a little elf...Copy !req
1005. Just shut up!Copy !req
1006. You have all been created...Copy !req
1007. for a very ridiculous purpose.Copy !req
1008. I want you to drive this plane...Copy !req
1009. into that brick wall!Copy !req
1010. Zero-one-niner,
requesting permission...Copy !req
1011. for approach
to smash into brick wall, over.Copy !req
1012. Permission granted!Copy !req
1013. Right on!Copy !req
1014. - Frylock! You?
- Change of plans, Bittle!Copy !req
1015. - That's all you got? Come on!
- Let go!Copy !req
1016. No!Copy !req
1017. No!
My creations!Copy !req
1018. Fucking sandals!Copy !req
1019. So, I diverted the plane to Africa...Copy !req
1020. so we could try to stop world hunger.Copy !req
1021. Running into a brick wall just seemed...Copy !req
1022. like it would hurt. A lot.Copy !req
1023. I mean, that's just dumb.Copy !req
1024. All right, listen up. When we hit the ground,
I want everybody...Copy !req
1025. to spread out
in a three meter stance...Copy !req
1026. wait for air backup and then we're going...Copy !req
1027. Chicken Bittle
did not survive the trip.Copy !req
1028. And it didn't us long
to freak out all of Africa.Copy !req
1029. - Hi, how ya doing?
- Hey, wait! No! We're here to help you!Copy !req
1030. Come on, don't run!
Where you going?Copy !req
1031. Our mission failed.Copy !req
1032. So we came back to the States
and rented out this house in New Jersey.Copy !req
1033. I couldn't live up to my father's
backwards, retarded expectations.Copy !req
1034. I came here to follow my dream...Copy !req
1035. of dancing professionally...Copy !req
1036. in the nude.Copy !req
1037. I mean, on Broadway.Copy !req
1038. - I don't remember any of this.
- Me neither.Copy !req
1039. You kept playing with your Gameboy.Copy !req
1040. I'd say, "Shake, look up.
We're saving that."Copy !req
1041. And you were all like,
"Well I'm on level three."Copy !req
1042. I do remember level three.Copy !req
1043. Well, did you ever get
to dance... professionally?Copy !req
1044. That was a lifetime ago, Meatwad.
I have other responsibilities now.Copy !req
1045. Yeah, dinner, right?
Where is it?Copy !req
1046. - We're home.
- This ain't my house.Copy !req
1047. Mine neither.Copy !req
1048. Linda, this is some...
food that you've made.Copy !req
1049. What is it?Copy !req
1050. Apple cinnamon flavored
monkey gland energy shake.Copy !req
1051. Thought I tasted a hint
of the monkey gland...Copy !req
1052. Excuse me.Copy !req
1053. Linda, I care about you.
I respect you.Copy !req
1054. So where am I gonna do you?Copy !req
1055. - Man, jackpot!
- Yeah.Copy !req
1056. Lie down on it while I get nude.Copy !req
1057. Yeah, I like it!Copy !req
1058. Oh man, you are wild!Copy !req
1059. - Thank you God!
- Yeah. My bedroom.Copy !req
1060. Hey baby, your muscle's leaking...Copy !req
1061. What's up with that?Copy !req
1062. Oh no, no!Copy !req
1063. Crap!Copy !req
1064. - Shit.
- This is going to hurt!Copy !req
1065. - A lot!
- Crap, crap, crap, crap!Copy !req
1066. Oh, don't cry.
You've been such a good boy.Copy !req
1067. I'm gonna let you have a lolly!Copy !req
1068. Now lick it!Copy !req
1069. - Listen. Is that Carl?
- Carl!Copy !req
1070. Welcome home, boy!Copy !req
1071. - You bastard!
- Not anymore, daddy!Copy !req
1072. - Daddy?
- Bring it on, motherfucker!Copy !req
1073. Come on, take this!Copy !req
1074. Come on, I thought you'd love that!Copy !req
1075. You'd like some more?Copy !req
1076. That's all you got?Copy !req
1077. God damn it!Copy !req
1078. Oh, God Carl!Copy !req
1079. Thank God. Unchain me.Copy !req
1080. Where'd you get that lollipop?Copy !req
1081. Bring it on! Come on! Take this!
And some of that with you!Copy !req
1082. Can you hold on a sec?
Hold on, hold on, hold on...Copy !req
1083. What is it, Steve?Copy !req
1084. Did you need anything else
from me today?Copy !req
1085. 'Cause my wife wants me home
at six and...Copy !req
1086. Go ahead and punch out.Copy !req
1087. No, not that one.Copy !req
1088. Yes.
That one.Copy !req
1089. OK everybody, have a good one.Copy !req
1090. God, I love that!Copy !req
1091. So you created the Insanoflex!Copy !req
1092. So you could build someone else up
and use their muscles.Copy !req
1093. Yeah.Copy !req
1094. Keep going.Copy !req
1095. I don't know.Copy !req
1096. - To fight me?
- Yes!Copy !req
1097. Yes, that's exactly why!Copy !req
1098. But... but why?Copy !req
1099. Because I hate you, Daddy!Copy !req
1100. No, don't you pull
this reverse psychology crap with me!Copy !req
1101. - It was you who created me!
- No!Copy !req
1102. It was you who created me!Copy !req
1103. - Do you remember this?
- That's Little Death Bear.Copy !req
1104. - How do I know that?
- But you said I couldn't have it!Copy !req
1105. Because you said
I would lose a hand!Copy !req
1106. Yeah, man, I mean, look at it,
it's covered with razor blades!Copy !req
1107. - Well, now I have it.
- Can I have it?Copy !req
1108. God, now I remember!Copy !req
1109. - You wanted that thing for Christmas!
- Yes. And instead...Copy !req
1110. you gave me this.
A Baby Wets All Night!Copy !req
1111. And it screwed me up forever!Copy !req
1112. - But, that's not how I remember it.
- How do you remember it, Daddy?Copy !req
1113. - With star wipes?
- Yeah, a lot of star wipes.Copy !req
1114. And Phil Collins
is constantly In The Air Tonight.Copy !req
1115. Tonight.
I love that song, but why?Copy !req
1116. - Behold!
- Wait a minute! Wait a minute!Copy !req
1117. What are you doing back there?Copy !req
1118. A VHS that you had produced!Copy !req
1119. No, that's impossible!Copy !req
1120. You've got a VCR
in the back of your head?Copy !req
1121. It's like David Cronenberg
all up in here.Copy !req
1122. It's all coming together now,
don't you see?Copy !req
1123. You created him
with a piece of your brain!Copy !req
1124. And he was your only son.Copy !req
1125. But it didn't come out right,
because you were a bad father.Copy !req
1126. So you altered your memories
to take away the pain.Copy !req
1127. Because you thought...
You know, Chicken Bittle?Copy !req
1128. You remember him?
His death was your fault!Copy !req
1129. So you wiped your mind clean...Copy !req
1130. threw away your old identity,
and started a new life...Copy !req
1131. in obscurity.Copy !req
1132. No, that's not how it happened.Copy !req
1133. This is a VHS, he's a VCR...Copy !req
1134. and he lives with us.Copy !req
1135. Daddy, you've grown
into a beautiful young woman.Copy !req
1136. Yeah, thanks.
Let's keep that on the down low.Copy !req
1137. - What did I tell you?
- I don't believe it. Come on!Copy !req
1138. Pay up! Five bucks. Come on!Copy !req
1139. - But how did?
- Trapped in a man's body.Copy !req
1140. - But you was...
- I'm a lesbian.Copy !req
1141. - Yeah, but still, I mean...
- On Oprah.Copy !req
1142. - Yeah, but the...
- Plastic novelty vagina.Copy !req
1143. - Well, that... explains a lot.
- But one question still remains.Copy !req
1144. - We created all of you!
- Mutants!Copy !req
1145. And the world
you pathetically pretend to live in.Copy !req
1146. Now, bring us your beer!Copy !req
1147. - Your remote needs batteries.
- The TV sucks, man.Copy !req
1148. - And now it needs fixing.
- Children, please.Copy !req
1149. Stop all this bickering!Copy !req
1150. That's that watermelon
I was telling you about.Copy !req
1151. And that was another lie.
And you're going to hell!Copy !req
1152. Feel the sweet embrace
of Satan's hoof against your face!Copy !req
1153. Shake!Copy !req
1154. Meatwad?Copy !req
1155. Buddy?Copy !req
1156. Are you OK?Copy !req
1157. Stand aside!Copy !req
1158. - What... what happened?
- Neil!Copy !req
1159. Play the drum solo of life!Copy !req
1160. Yeah, yeah! Rock! Rock out!Copy !req
1161. Forget it. I don't want it.Copy !req
1162. Hey y'all, I live!Copy !req
1163. - Who are you?
- I am Walter Melon.Copy !req
1164. - This is my accomplice Neil.
- How's it going?Copy !req
1165. - Hi.
- Hello.Copy !req
1166. And this puddle over here
used to be Steve.Copy !req
1167. The drum solo of life!Copy !req
1168. No, no, that's OK.Copy !req
1169. - What are you doin' here?
- Well, I only...Copy !req
1170. created all of you!Copy !req
1171. I also created the Insanoflex...Copy !req
1172. and produced
three top-selling exercise videos.Copy !req
1173. Then I lost my job.
That sucked.Copy !req
1174. They said I spent too
much time editing my videos...Copy !req
1175. and not enough time
breaking down egg crates...Copy !req
1176. which is what I should be doing now
had I not been fired.Copy !req
1177. You two were to destroy
each other today...Copy !req
1178. so I would inherit your real estate
to build the ultimate franchise.Copy !req
1179. The Insano-Gym!Copy !req
1180. - But we rent.
- So do I.Copy !req
1181. - Man, we live at the Y.
- Till we get some things going.Copy !req
1182. - They won't let us use the pool, man.
- Yes. They won't.Copy !req
1183. Are you serious?Copy !req
1184. Yeah man!
They said we pee in the pool. 'Cause I do!Copy !req
1185. - And I as well.
- Yes!Copy !req
1186. Digital gold cascades
from our square bladders.Copy !req
1187. No, about the renting.
You all rent?Copy !req
1188. - Oh, yes.
- Yes sir. Very much so.Copy !req
1189. - At the Y.
- But the Insano-Gym!Copy !req
1190. You couldn't put a gym
in a residential neighborhood.Copy !req
1191. It's not even zoned for commercial use.Copy !req
1192. You'd probably have to go
through the city, or something.Copy !req
1193. Yeah. Well. I guess this
kinda foils your stupid plan.Copy !req
1194. - Papa?
- Well, yeah! Kinda!Copy !req
1195. Damn it!
I'm telling your mother.Copy !req
1196. - Mother?
- Neil, come on!Copy !req
1197. Wait, wait!
We have a mother?Copy !req
1198. Yes, Frylock, I am your mother.Copy !req
1199. And I am a nine-layer bean burrito.Copy !req
1200. That's neat.Copy !req
1201. Time for bed, honey.Copy !req