American Splendor (2003)

1. action!

2. trick or treat.

3. Well, look at this, all the superheroes on our porch.

4. Ain't that cute?

5. We got superman here,

6. and Batman and his sidekick Robin.

7. The green lantern.

8. And what about you, young man?

9. What about what?

10. Who are you supposed to be?

11. I'm Harvey pekar.

12. Pecker, pecker, pecker.

13. Harvey pekar.

14. That doesn't sound like a superhero to me.

15. - pecker, pecker.

16. I ain't no superhero, lady.

17. I'm just a kid from the neighborhood, all right?

18. Aw, forget this.

19. Why does everybody have to be so stupid?

20. okay...

21. This guy here, he's our man—

22. all grown up and going nowhere.

23. Although he's a pretty scholarly cat,

24. he never got much of a formal education.

25. For the most part he's lived in shit neighborhoods,

26. held shit jobs and is now knee-deep

27. into a disastrous second marriage.

28. So if you're the kind of person looking for romance or escapism,

29. or some fantasy figure to save the day,

30. guess what?

31. You got the wrong movie.

32. that's great.

33. Okay, so now you got four picks.

34. You oughtta be able to patch one together from that.

35. Right?

36. Let's go to the next one, all right?

37. Hold on a second. Do you want some water or something?

38. Nah, I got lots of orange.

39. - Do you like orange soda? - Yeah, orange is all right.

40. All right, so let's go to the next sequence.

41. Did you actually read the script?

42. No. a little bit.

43. - A little bit? - Just to check the construction.

44. You know, of how the piece was constructed.

45. I didn't read it word for word.

46. Do you feel weird saying this stuff?

47. No, I don't feel weird sayin' it.

48. I don't know how long my voice is gonna hold out, but...

49. doc, you gotta help me, man.

50. My old lady's dumpin' me 'cause I can't talk.

51. She says I'm a social embarrassment.

52. Now that she's got her ph.D.

53. She's some hotshit academic star,

54. and I'm nothin' but a file clerk.

55. Yeah but, you know, me being a file clerk was fine

56. when I was signing the damn checks for her tuition, man.

57. Harvey...

58. Stop talking, please, and open wide.

59. I started worrying my voice'd never come back, you know?

60. - Say "ahh," Mr. pekar. - I mean, it's torture, I'm tellin' ya.

61. Shh. ahh.

62. Ahhhh.

63. Uh-huh.

64. What?

65. Is it bad, doc?

66. It's not good.

67. It's cancer.

68. First I got marital problems,

69. and now you're telling me i got throat cancer.

70. For Christ sake, man.

71. Harvey, calm down, it's not cancer.

72. You have a nodule on your vocal cords,

73. probably from screaming and yelling so much.

74. And if you don't give it a rest,

75. you're gonna lose your voice completely.

76. Okay okay okay.

77. But for how long?

78. A few months.

79. months?

80. Hey.

81. Hey, come on, what is this?

82. Exactly what it looks like.

83. What do you mean?

84. You mean you're dumpin' me?

85. For what?

86. Look, this, uh, plebeian lifestyle

87. just isn't working for me anymore, okay?

88. I gotta get out of here before I kill myself.

89. wait a minute, wait, wait a minute.

90. Just listen to what i have to say, okay?

91. don't go.

92. I need you, baby.

93. Please, don't go, okay?

94. here's our man.

95. Yeah, all right, here's me.

96. Or the guy playing me anyway.

97. Though he don't look nothin' like me, but whatever.

98. So it's a few months later

99. and I'm working my flunky file-clerk gig

100. at the v.A. Hospital.

101. My voice still ain't back yet.

102. Thank you, Harvey dear.

103. Things seem like they can't get any worse.

104. "Plebeian"?

105. Where the hell'd she get that shit, man?

106. "avoid the reeking herd.

107. Shun the polluted flock.

108. Live like that stoic bird,

109. the eagle of the rock."

110. Hey, Mr. boats.

111. You know what that means, son?

112. Yup, it's, uh...

113. It's from an Elinor hoyt wylie poem.

114. It means, um...

115. Excuse me. It means...

116. Stay away from the crowds of common ordinary people

117. and do your own thing.

118. No.

119. It means don't compromise yourself for women.

120. It ain't gonna do you no good.

121. Get away from 'em as soon as you can.

122. Yup, well, I ain't got no woman now so...

123. I'm living like the stoic bird, man.

124. It's the only way to live, son.

125. Mr. Look at that fool there.

126. Probably listening to that loud rock stuff.

127. Junk.

128. Junk, it's all junk.

129. Yeah, I don't know, you know, I mean...

130. Rock music's got some good qualities, uh...

131. It isn't jazz or nothin', but you know...

132. Say, when you gonna bring me in some of those good records?

133. Some nat king Cole with strings?

134. I don't got any of that, Mr. boats.

135. - Yeah, you got 'em. - Yeah.

136. You're keeping 'em at home though.

137. You won't turn loose the good stuff. You just sell the junk!

138. Nah, I...

139. I just— I, you know, keep the stuff I wanna keep.

140. I don't, you know...

141. I sold a lot of good material by people,

142. you know, that he didn't like, you know?

143. You know, Mr. boats didn't like any blues

144. or anything like that.

145. And, uh...

146. He played classical violin.

147. I started record collecting

148. when I was 15 or 16 years old.

149. I started getting interested in jazz.

150. Prior to that I had collected comic books.

151. I was always a collector.

152. I admit to having an obsessive-compulsive quality in me.

153. It's like the "treasure of the Sierra madre" or something.

154. You know, you go to thrift shops and you go to garage sales

155. 'cause you think you're gonna find something that's,

156. you know, real rare.

157. And, you know, most of the time it's a total waste of time.

158. But once in a while

159. you'll come up with something and it'll whet your appetite.

160. In the early '60s

161. I was with some buddies at a junk sale

162. lookin' for some choice sides

163. when I met this shy retiring cat from Philadelphia

164. named Bob crumb. You know the guy—

165. "fritz the cat," "Mr. Natural" and all.

166. They made a movie about him too.

167. Oh, Jay mcshann, man.

168. Aw, c'mon, harv, you gonna buy that or what?

169. Eh, I don't know, Marty. It's got a lamination crack in it, you know.

170. A quarter.

171. Yeah, maybe I can talk it down.

172. You are one cheap bastard, Harvey.

173. Yeah, I know I'm tight, man.

174. But I live on a government wage.

175. You collect Jay mcshann, man?

176. Yeah, man, how about you?

177. Yeah. but most of my records are back in Philly.

178. Hey, Harvey, meet my buddy Bob crumb.

179. He just moved to town.

180. He's an artist with the American greeting card company.

181. - Oh, that's cool. - You should see his comics, harv.

182. - They are outta sight. - Yeah?

183. Hey, I'm into comics myself.

184. So crumb showed me this comic book novel

185. he was working on, "the big yum yum book."

186. I'd never seen anything like it.

187. This is terrific. I really dig your work, man.

188. This "peter wheat" book is by Walt Kelly.

189. It's pretty rare.

190. Oh yeah? Can I get good bread for it?

191. Not yet.

192. Oh.

193. Listen, man, let's get back to your book.

194. What are you gonna do with it?

195. I haven't really thought about it.

196. It's just an exercise.

197. No, man, it's more than just an exercise.

198. It's breaking ground, man.

199. There's some wild shit in here, Bob.

200. You're spitting on me, Harvey.

201. Crumb and I hung out a lot back then.

202. We had records and comics in common.

203. Check it out, man.

204. Pretty scary.

205. Yeah.

206. You don't know the half of it, man.

207. Eventually people got hip to crumb's artwork

208. and he started hangin' out with a bohemian crowd.

209. After a while he got sick of greeting cards

210. and moved away to San Francisco,

211. where he got the whole underground comic scene off the ground.

212. He'd come back to Cleveland every few years

213. and people would treat him like a celebrity.

214. Once he came to visit when I was feelin' real bad.

215. It was right after my wife left me.

216. She got so mean to me at the end.

217. And-and— like I tried to keep her captive

218. or anything like that, you know?

219. - I don't know, man. - Hmm.

220. But don't think I buy into any of this growth crap, man.

221. Everybody's always talkin' about how bad experiences

222. 'cause you to grow and all that cliched stuff, man.

223. And I got enough bad experiences and growth to last me plenty.

224. Right now...

225. I'd be glad to trade some growth for happiness.

226. So how long you staying in Cleveland, man?

227. I don't know. I got to see this chick in New York

228. and I'm really busy with the comic book stuff.

229. It's good bread and all, I'm just getting sick of the whole scene.

230. What are you talking about?

231. You make a good living doing your art, right?

232. Shh...

233. Not many guys get that lucky in their life, huh?

234. Yeah, I know.

235. No, man, listen, I'll tell you something,

236. people are starting to know the name "crumb."

237. When you croak, man, you're gonna leave something behind.

238. - Yeah, I guess. - Yeah-hh.

239. It's not like I'm blind lemon Jefferson

240. or big mama Thornton or nothing.

241. Aw, come on, man, I'll tell you something.

242. It sure beats working a gig like mine—

243. being a nobody flunky

244. and selling records on the side for a buck.

245. Yeah well, that's true.

246. P.A.: doctor redman, doctor redman.

247. listen, girlie.

248. These glasses are six for $2,

249. because I couldn't carry 12.

250. But I wanted 12.

251. So today I'm buying six more.

252. But you should only charge me $1.50 for them.

253. It's all right.

254. You can ask the manager.

255. Frank, I need a price check.

256. Man, old Jewish ladies will argue forever

257. with a cashier about anything.

258. You get behind them in line and you're gonna wait forever, man.

259. - ... Because I couldn't carry 12...

260. I mean, I'm a yid myself

261. and women in my family are like that,

262. but I never got used to it.

263. I mean, I may be cheap, but I got limits, man.

264. Let me 'splain, one more time.

265. These glasses are six for $2.

266. Hey, wake up!

267. Your whole life's getting eaten away with this kind of crap.

268. What kind of existence is this?

269. Is this all a working stiff like you can expect?

270. You're gonna suffer in silence for the rest of your life

271. or are you gonna make a Mark, huh?

272. Huh?

273. Huh?

274. okay, I have the money right here, even money,

275. $1.50— you don't even have to open the cash register.

276. - Even change and d...

277. Oh shit.

278. ever since I read your stuff, man,

279. I've been thinking I could write comic book stories

280. that are different from anything that's being done.

281. Mm-hmm.

282. I figure, you know, the guys who are doing

283. animal comics and, uh, superhero stuff,

284. they're really limited.

285. - Because they gotta try to appeal to kids.

286. And underground stuff like yours have been really

287. subversive and it's opened things up politically,

288. but there's still plenty more to be done with them too, you know?

289. Pass the ketchup.

290. I mean...

291. With words and pictures, it could be more of an art form.

292. You know, like those— like those French movies are.

293. Or, uh, or de sica over in Italy.

294. So anyway, I just— i tried, uh...

295. I tried writing some stuff about real life.

296. You know, stuff that, uh, the everyman's gotta deal with.

297. These are all about you?

298. Yeah.

299. You've turned yourself into a comic hero.

300. Well sorta, yeah, but you know, there's no idealized shit.

301. You know, there's no phony bullshit.

302. This is the real thing, man.

303. 'Cause, you know, ordinary life is pretty complex stuff.

304. These are, really...

305. Good.

306. Really, you think so?

307. Yeah, this is great stuff, I dig it.

308. Can I take 'em home and illustrate 'em?

309. oh, wow, man!

310. You'd really do that for me, man?

311. oh man, that would be great,

312. because I can't even draw a straight line, Bob.

313. Hey, what's up with your voice, harv?

314. All of a sudden you sound fine.

315. i don't know, man.

316. I guess you cured me, man.

317. I tell you, man, that Bonnie, legs that go forever.

318. Man #2: So how smart is she?

319. I don't know, I guess she's about average.

320. Average?

321. Hey, man, average is dumb.

322. - She's dumb. - I don't care— she's not my chick.

323. "Hey, man, average is dumb."

324. How 'bout that, man. That's all stories by yours truly.

325. - Hot off the presses. - That's right, man.

326. - We have a regular Hemingway here. - No way, man.

327. I don't go in for any of that macho crap.

328. I didn't know you could draw, pekar.

329. No no no no, i don't draw it, doc.

330. - I just— I write the stories. - Harvey, am I in here?

331. Yeah, Toby, you're in there, all right?

332. Take it easy, for Christ sake.

333. A buddy of mine, some of his friends, they do the artwork.

334. Let me see this.

335. Mr. boats, it's not polite to grab things.

336. - Next time— - uh uh uh.

337. Mm-hmm. this is not bad.

338. Son, you done good. Hmm.

339. But you know, i was up in Toronto a few weeks back

340. and I saw the red Chinese ballet. Now that was beautiful,

341. the way those people were dancing together.

342. Those Chinese, they work hard.

343. - I tell you they work hard. - Mm-hmm.

344. Where's everybody going?

345. Where are you sickly men rushing off to?

346. You ain't going nowhere for now.

347. Maybe not for a long time.

348. But damn, if they're not a rushing off to get there.

349. so, Harvey, how do your co-workers

350. and friends feel about you putting them in your comics?

351. They love it. They can't get enough of it.

352. They'd come up to me demanding to know

353. why I'm not in the new issue.

354. Most of 'em.

355. What about overhearing what people say?

356. Are you always listening at work?

357. Were you listening on— riding the bus?

358. - Yeah, I listen. - At the supermarket?

359. Yeah, I listen.

360. I fall asleep on people too, but I listen some.

361. Here's our man eight comics later.

362. A brand-new decade, same old bullshit.

363. Yeah sure, he gets lots of recognition for his writing now.

364. Sure, his comics are praised by all the important media types

365. telling people what to think. But so what?

366. It's not like he makes a living at it, like Bob crumb.

367. He can't go and quit his day job or nothing.

368. Who am I kidding?

369. Truth is I'd be lost without my work routine.

370. Ahh.

371. I got a job.

372. Oh shit.

373. I got a job.

374. I got a job.

375. Hi, Harvey.

376. Do you want these gourmet jelly beans?

377. I gave up sweets for lent.

378. Yeah sure, I'll take 'em, man.

379. I recommend the pina coladas.

380. They're excellent and very authentic tasting.

381. It's watermelon, that's pretty good, tobe.

382. Wait till you try the pina coladas.

383. Hey, tobe, tell me something.

384. Can you eat, uh, lentils during lent?

385. Sure, I don't see why not.

386. You can't eat meat on certain days,

387. but lentils should be acceptable anytime.

388. Oh yeah?

389. You think there's any connection between lentils and lent?

390. I don't think so.

391. But I'll ask sister Mary Fred at church on Sunday.

392. Sister Mary Fred, huh?

393. Is she cute?

394. Sounds kinda mannish, but who the hell am I to be picky?

395. Harvey, you're funny.

396. She's a nun.

397. So what, man?

398. And maybe she became a nun because she couldn't get a guy.

399. Harvey, she became a nun

400. because she had a higher calling.

401. Higher calling, what a crock of shit.

402. Man, you know, i don't even know why

403. you bother praying, anyway.

404. I enjoy the ritual.

405. And I'm a very spiritual person.

406. You know, you should try believing in something

407. bigger than yourself.

408. It might cheer you up.

409. What, do I seem depressed, Toby?

410. - Man: cut!

411. That was great, guys, the bakery scene's next.

412. The bakery scene's next? I never heard of no bakery scene.

413. Did you ever hear of a bakery scene?

414. - The bakery scene is next? - Bakery's my scene,

415. but not— not in that way.

416. Forget the bakery, let's eat some jelly beans.

417. Yeah, I think one might be lime,

418. one might be, like mint.

419. Well, what's the difference between this and this?

420. One's cherry, one's cinnamon.

421. You could tell that by just looking at 'em?

422. Not me, i have to put it in my mouth first.

423. Real Toby: Loneliness can feel so bad.

424. There had been times I felt lonely,

425. 'cause a lot of time it was just me and my grandmother.

426. And I would just be sitting in my room all day

427. watching television or reading books.

428. That was before I bought a computer, of course.

429. So how, how do you cope with loneliness, Harvey?

430. Um, did I say i watched television?

431. Yeah, you mentioned you watch TV,

432. you listen to your jazz records,

433. you read, you write.

434. You do your stick figures

435. so you could plan for your next comic book.

436. - Yeah, that's about it. - 'Cause I've seen many of your stick figures

437. and that seems to be pretty interesting.

438. Hmm, chocolate jelly beans, I'm gonna have to try one.

439. Go ahead.

440. - Excuse me, can I help you?

441. Yeah, um...

442. Can you give me,

443. uh, two crullers,

444. - a jelly donut with the powdered sugar. - Thank you.

445. Thanks for coming.

446. Hey, you got any of that day-old bread?

447. - I think so. - Yeah?

448. Here you go.

449. $3.00.

450. Um, you're Harvey pekar.

451. Yeah.

452. Alice Quinn, from school.

453. Oh yeah yeah.

454. College, yeah yeah.

455. Yeah, we had a couple of lit classes together.

456. Yeah, what happened to you?

457. I mean, you just disappeared after two semesters.

458. Yeah, I know, man, uh...

459. You know, I got good grades and all, but there was that

460. required math class, you know, hanging over my head.

461. Eventually the pressure got to be too much, so...

462. Oh. uh, you're doing okay anyway, I mean,

463. I heard all about your jazz reviews and your comics.

464. You did?

465. Sure. you're famous.

466. - Ah. - meanwhile I got my degree and I'm—

467. I'm just a plain old wife and mother.

468. Oh.

469. Yeah well, uh...

470. I'm not doing as great as you think, uh...

471. My second wife divorced me, i work a dead-end job as a...

472. File clerk, so...

473. You know, sometimes I hang out with the guys on the corner,

474. but most of the time I just stay at home by myself and I read.

475. Well, you're luckier than you think.

476. Between my husband and my kids,

477. it's impossible for me to curl up with a good book.

478. You know, I'm reading this book by dreiser now,

479. - uh, "jennie gerhardt." - That's one of my favorites.

480. Yeah?

481. You know, i hope that book don't end like, uh,

482. so many of those naturalist novels with someone,

483. you know, getting crushed to earth

484. by forces he can't control.

485. - Hmm, I think you'll be pleasantly surprised. - Yeah?

486. I mean, it's certainly not your Hollywood happy ending,

487. but it's pretty truthful, which is rare these days.

488. Yeah, you're right.

489. - Mmm, this is me. - Oh, all right.

490. Nice car, yeah.

491. - Thanks. - I don't have one yet.

492. Oh, can I give you a lift somewhere?

493. Uh, nah, that's all right.

494. It's a nice day, I'll just— I'll walk.

495. It was nice seeing you, Harvey.

496. Yeah.

497. when I got home

498. I finished reading "jennie gerhardt."

499. It was real good. That Alice was right.

500. Sure, Lester, the main character,

501. croaks in the end,

502. but at least he's old and dies a natural, dignified death.

503. I was more alone that weekend than any.

504. Sometimes in my sleep I'd feel a body next to me,

505. like an amputee feels a phantom limb.

506. All I did was think about jennie gerhardt

507. and Alice Quinn

508. and all the decades of people I have known.

509. The more I thought, the more I felt like crying.

510. Life seemed so sweet,

511. and so sad

512. and so hard to let go of in the end.

513. But hey, man, every day's a brand-new deal, right?

514. Just keep on working and something's bound to turn up.

515. What happened to the new "American splendor"?

516. Uh, I think we sold them, babe.

517. - All of them? - Yup.

518. Rand.

519. I put one aside for myself next to the register.

520. I haven't even had time to read it yet.

521. Oh, sorry, Joyce. I didn't know you were such a "splendor" fan.

522. Next time take it home.

523. You know what, maybe I'll call the publisher.

524. That'll take so damn long, shit!

525. Why does everything in my life have to be such a complicated disaster?

526. Okay well, maybe we can call someone—

527. - what is this? - All right, okay.

528. I'm gonna hustle before the vibe in here gets any worse.

529. You can just hang.

530. "dear Mr. pekar,

531. greetings from the second smallest state in the union...

532. An endless plastics and nylon plantation

533. controlled by giant chemical corporations.

534. To make matters more dismal,

535. there are no decent comic book stores in my town,

536. which is why my partner and I opened one ourselves.

537. Despite our steadily faltering business,

538. my partner managed to sell the last copy

539. of "American splendor" number eight

540. out from under me.

541. I'm a big fan and I hate to wait for a new order.

542. Is there any way I can get it from you direct?

543. Sincerely, Joyce brabner."

544. Man, she's got good-looking handwriting.

545. "dear Joyce, thanks for the let—"

546. "Dear Joyce, thanks for the letter.

547. What do you do besides selling comics?"

548. Uh, anybody in the room ever done

549. any creative writing of any sort?

550. - Joyce: "I'm a sometime activist,

551. and I teach writing to prisoners.

552. I try to help them build an interior life

553. and make art out of their monotonous,

554. suffocating routine."

555. "that sounds familiar. So you married or what?"

556. "I'm divorced, thank god."

557. Look, I think you and I got a lot in common, you know?

558. How am I gonna get you to come visit me in Cleveland?

559. - Cleveland? - yeah.

560. You think that's a good idea?

561. Yeah, it's a great idea.

562. You know, you should meet me because I'm a great guy.

563. You know, despite the way my comics read,

564. I've got a lot of redeeming characteristics.

565. I don't know, where would I stay?

566. I don't know, uh, with me.

567. You know, don't worry, I'm not gonna put no moves on ya or anything.

568. I'm not worried about that. Hold on, I just spilled my chamomile tea all over me.

569. Yeah.

570. So what are you worried about then?

571. Well, it's the way...

572. - It's the way all of the different artists draw you. - What?

573. I don't really know what to expect.

574. Sometimes you look like a younger Brando.

575. Uh, but then the way crumb draws you,

576. you look like a hairy ape with all these...

577. Wavy stinky lines undulating off your body.

578. I-i don't really know what to expect.

579. No, those are motion lines.

580. The, uh... I'm an active guy.

581. Anyway, look, just come out here

582. and I will try to be anyone that you want me to be, okay?

583. That's a dangerous offer. I'm a notorious reformer.

584. Hey, are you Joyce?

585. - Hey, Harvey. - Hey.

586. - So we finally meet in person. - Heya.

587. Look, before we get started with any of this,

588. you might as well know right off the bat, i had a vasectomy.

589. What's wrong?

590. Nothing.

591. Something's wrong, you keep looking around everywhere.

592. I guess I never

593. imagined you'd eat in a place like this.

594. What, me? No, I've never been here.

595. I don't know, I thought— i thought you'd like it.

596. But obviously you don't, do you?

597. No, it's fine. What difference does it make?

598. I don't know, none, I guess.

599. Man, they got a lotta meat on this menu.

600. You're a vegetarian?

601. Kinda, you know, i mean...

602. Ever since I got a pet cat, you know,

603. I've had a lot of trouble eating animals.

604. Hmm.

605. I support and identify with groups like peta,

606. but unfortunately I'm a self-diagnosed anemic.

607. Uh-huh.

608. Also I have all these food allergies to vegetables

609. which give me serious intestinal distress.

610. I guess I have a lot of borderline health disorders

611. that limit me politically when it comes to eating.

612. Wow, you're a— you're a sick woman.

613. Not yet, but I expect to be.

614. Everyone in my family has some sort of degenerative illness.

615. Good evening.

616. Look, you know, i was gonna clean up,

617. but why should I give you any false notions?

618. You know, the truth is i got a serious problem with cleanliness.

619. You know, I could wash a dish 10 times, it'd still be dirty.

620. They even, uh, kicked me outta the army

621. 'cause I couldn't learn to make a bed.

622. I've seen worse.

623. Harvey, would you get me some water and a few aspirin?

624. What, do you got a headache?

625. - No, but I want to avoid one. - Oh yeah.

626. Let me tell you something, Joyce,

627. it sure is nice to have company.

628. You know, I mean,

629. despite all your problems, you seem like a great person.

630. And, hey, you know, I'm sorry if my dating skills are a little rusty.

631. You know, it's just,

632. I've been through hell and back with women.

633. That last one turned out to be a real nasty bitch.

634. I had a nice time with you too.

635. Yeah? you had a nice time?

636. Don't make people repeat themselves, that's annoying.

637. Oh, sorry.

638. Come here.

639. - no.

640. Oh oh.

641. Harvey, which way is the bathroom?

642. Oh, through the kitchen and a right.

643. - Joyce, hey.

644. Joyce, what's wrong? What is it?

645. Uhh, I don't know.

646. I think that yuppie food did me in.

647. I feel terrible, man.

648. - let me at least do something for you.

649. Uh, can— can i make you something?

650. Hey, how about some chamomile tea?

651. - Chamomile tea? - Yeah.

652. What's a guy like you doing with that?

653. I thought you drank soda pop for breakfast.

654. I don't know, you know. I just noticed you drank a lot of it

655. when we started talking on the phone.

656. Uh, you know, the girl at the food co-op...

657. She picked me out all kinds of this herbal stuff.

658. Man, one of these is good for stomachaches.

659. Got grandma bear's tummy mint or something, I think.

660. - Hey, are you still there?

661. Hey.

662. Harvey...

663. I think we should skip the whole courtship thing

664. and just get married.

665. Man, am I glad I talked you into coming up here.

666. You know, any more time alone,

667. I really— I really might've lost it.

668. Mmm, me too.

669. You don't have any problems with moving to Cleveland?

670. Not really.

671. I find most American cities to be depressing in the same way.

672. And you're okay with the vasectomy thing?

673. No, you can't have any of my white castle hamburgers,

674. so please don't even ask.

675. Yeah, can i have a fry?

676. Okay, but just a couple, Harvey.

677. I'm not going to be eating dinner until very late

678. and this has got to hold me over.

679. Yeah, what do ya got, a church function?

680. No, I'm driving to Toledo to see a movie.

681. Would you like to come?

682. Uh, nah, I gotta—

683. I gotta go to Delaware tonight, I'm getting married.

684. - Oh. - yeah.

685. - Why Delaware? - Well, you know, the chick I'm marrying

686. is from wilmin'ton.

687. You know, plus I gotta help her move her stuff back here.

688. Why're you driving to Toledo to see a movie, tobe?

689. It's not playing at the mapletown.

690. - Okay. - I didn't know you had a girlfriend, Harvey.

691. Yeah yeah yeah, we met last week.

692. Tobe, what movie could possibly be worth

693. driving 260 miles round trip for?

694. It's a new film called "revenge of the nerds."

695. - Ahh. - it's about a group of nerd college students

696. who are being picked on all the time by the jocks.

697. So they decide to take revenge.

698. Uh-huh, so what you're saying is

699. you identify with those nerds.

700. Yes, I consider myself a nerd,

701. and this movie has uplifted me.

702. There's this one scene where a nerd grabs the microphone

703. during a pep rally and announces that he is a nerd

704. and that he is proud of it

705. and stands up for the rights of other nerds.

706. - Right on. - Then he asks all the kids at the pep rally

707. who think they are nerds to come forward.

708. so...

709. So nearly everyone in the place does.

710. - That's the way the movie ends. - Uh-huh.

711. - So the nerds won, huh? - Yes.

712. All right.

713. Wow, well, you know, you got this movie

714. and I'm getting hitched. We both had a good month, huh?

715. - Right. - yeah.

716. Harvey.

717. - Harvey, Harvey... - What, yeah?

718. How long are you going to be in Delaware,

719. because I'd really like to see this movie with you?

720. Yeah, I don't know, man.

721. You know, I'm gonna be gone like a week.

722. But then, you know, I'm gonna have a wife, so,

723. you know, so I'm gonna have to bring her along too.

724. Is it, uh, is it a girl flick?

725. Depends on the girl.

726. What kind of girl is your new bride?

727. Is she a nerd?

728. I don't know, man.

729. Maybe, yeah. She's into herbal tea.

730. Real Joyce: I did end up becoming a character in his comics,

731. and, you know, Harvey

732. tends to push the negative or the sour

733. and, uh, he can be very depressed

734. and therefore very depressing.

735. so, Harvey, do you think you portray Joyce fairly?

736. Yeah, I think i portray her... Fairly.

737. I, um, you...

738. You know, there's some things that she does

739. that I don't put in there,

740. for, you know...

741. Obvious reasons, you know,

742. I don't want to get my head cut off.

743. But, uh, I think it's—

744. my portrayal is

745. generally fairly accurate.

746. There have been stories that I've participated in

747. or things that have happened and I've seen them as, uh,

748. a lot more happy things going on in them

749. and he just doesn't— won't put that in because

750. he just doesn't think that sunshine and flowers sell.

751. Is that right?

752. - Well— - you always say misery loves company and...

753. What? you know, I mean, I'm just a gloomy guy, that's all.

754. Yeah.

755. It's my perspective, gloom and doom.

756. And see, I thought i was marrying somebody

757. with a sense of humor.

758. I guess i fooled you.

759. what a crock of shit, man. That's not the point.

760. I think you missed the whole point of the movie.

761. Where the hell am i supposed to find the point in garbage, Joyce?

762. I agree with Toby.

763. I think it's a story of hope and tolerance.

764. Yes, it's about time that the people

765. who get picked on get to be the heroes.

766. It's an entertaining flick and all

767. and I can see why you like it, Toby.

768. But those people on the screen

769. - ain't even supposed to be you, man. - Shhh.

770. They're— they're college students

771. who live with their parents in big houses in the suburbs.

772. You know, they're gonna get degrees, get good jobs,

773. and they're gonna stop being nerds, man!

774. Remember what I told you about loud talking? Use your inside voice, please.

775. Look, Toby, the guys in that movie

776. are not 28-year-old file clerks

777. who live with their grandmother in an ethnic ghetto.

778. - That's enough, Harvey. - They didn't get their computers

779. the way you did, by trading in a bunch of box tops

780. and $49.50 at the supermarket, man.

781. You're funny, Harvey.

782. I'm getting in the front.

783. Sure, Toby, fine. You go to the movies and daydream,

784. but this "revenge of the nerds" ain't reality.

785. It's Hollywood bullshit, tobe.

786. Harvey, let him alone.

787. the thing that I loved about it is I was transported

788. to another time in my own life...

789. I really liked when they took the video cameras...

790. If everyone in America could see this film.

791. - It's the same as the "i have a dream" speech, you know? - Very empowering...

792. maybe I was being so harsh on Toby

793. on account of my own problems.

794. See, I wasn't even married a month

795. and my old lady was already showing signs of trouble.

796. Granted, I tend to get married fast

797. 'cause I'll take any woman that'll have me.

798. But this time I really met my match.

799. Joyce.

800. Okay, how about these old 78s, Harvey?

801. Can't you sell them to one of your collectors?

802. Are you kidding me, man? No way.

803. I ain't getting rid of my 78s, okay?

804. Forget it then, i give up.

805. How can I make more storage space

806. if you won't get rid of anything?

807. You know what? I'll get rid of stuff, okay?

808. - Just not my good stuff. - Everything is your good stuff.

809. How am I supposed to live here if there's no room for me?

810. C'mon, baby.

811. I'll make room for you, okay?

812. - you just have to give me time.

813. I'm not so good at these kinds of things.

814. - That's because you're obsessive-compulsive. - Oh, c'mon!

815. I don't wanna hear that psychobabble crap.

816. I don't care if you don't want to hear it.

817. You are the poster child for the d.S.M.-III.

818. I'll have you know i come from a very dysfunctional family, Harvey.

819. I can spot a personality disorder miles away.

820. Hello, Joyce.

821. Is Harvey home?

822. Borderline autistic.

823. Are you listening to me?

824. I tell you that Toby is a spy.

825. Paranoid personality disorder.

826. Polymorphously perverse.

827. - Harvey on answering machine: Hey, leave a message.

828. it's me, pick up the phone.

829. You're not gonna believe this, but, uh, some la producer

830. called and wants to do a play about my life.

831. Call me back. Call me here.

832. Delusions of grandeur.

833. See, I think comics can pretty much be an art form, man.

834. I mean, the pictures can be as...

835. As good as they want to be

836. and the words can be as good as they want to be and...

837. A man can do pretty much anything he wants to.

838. That's true, Harvey.

839. But I didn't come all the way from Delaware

840. to talk about comics.

841. if you think reading comics about your life seems strange,

842. try watching a play about it.

843. God only knows how I'll feel when I see this movie.

844. Things were going pretty good for a change.

845. "Variety" called me the blue-collar Mark twain,

846. and doubleday was interested in publishing

847. an anthology of "American splendor."

848. I hate checking bags, man, it always takes forever.

849. The bus is gonna leave soon.

850. That means I gotta shell out an extra 30 bucks for a cab, man.

851. Oh, here we go.

852. It figures. That lucky yuppie's gonna get the bus on time.

853. You know, vasectomies are reversible.

854. Goddamn yuppies get everything, man.

855. Are you listening to me? I said vasectomies are reversible.

856. What? what are you talking about?

857. I don't want no kids and i came clean about my vasectomy

858. the first time I set eyes on you.

859. I know, but I think things have changed. I think we can be a family.

860. Family, right. What kind of family could we possibly be?

861. I ain't no good with kids.

862. Christ, I can barely take care of myself.

863. I can take care of the kid and you.

864. No way, Joyce.

865. Forget it!

866. I can't have no kids. I can't do it.

867. Joyce, where the hell is that ornette Coleman album?

868. You know, I got a review due tomorrow.

869. I didn't touch it, Harvey.

870. Would you please let me sleep?

871. C'mon, it's 1:00.

872. C'mon, how late can a person sleep, man?

873. Ouch.

874. It happens to be Saturday, you selfish son of a bitch!

875. That don't make no difference.

876. And don't you tell me what to do.

877. I'm not telling you what to do, for Christ sake.

878. I'm the one who moved into your city, into your home.

879. It's your vasectomy.

880. It's your whole screwed-up life.

881. The least you could do is allow me to live here in my own way.

882. I tried everything.

883. But nothing could get this woman out of bed.

884. I mean, she wouldn't get a job, wouldn't go out,

885. wouldn't make friends, nothing.

886. Joyce.

887. Joyce diagnosed herself as clinically depressed.

888. I don't know what the hell she was going through,

889. but it was sure taking its toll on me.

890. Joyce, we got a message here.

891. How come you didn't pick—

892. useless, man.

893. hi, this is a message for Harvey pekar.

894. My name is Jonathan green and I'm a producer

895. with "late night with David letterman."

896. I would like to talk to you about

897. coming on the show to plug your comics.

898. Please give us a call at 212-555-3333.

899. - Thanks. - mmm.

900. Joyce finally got off the futon.

901. Huh?

902. Uh no.

903. Oh, for Christ...

904. C'mon, who the hell cares?

905. - Jesus chr— - give that to me.

906. What the hell are you doing, anyway?

907. Merchandising.

908. - Okay... - Joyce: People like this show?

909. yeah.

910. Ahem! man, I can't believe my voice is going out again.

911. - What's the matter? You were fine in the hotel. - I don't know.

912. You want something to drink?

913. Nah, I'm all right, I'm hungry, man. Aren't you hungry?

914. They should give you donuts or something, you know.

915. - Look at this. - Uh, Dave's ready for you now, Mr. pekar.

916. Oh, hey, listen, you got something to eat? 'Cause my stomach is growling.

917. - There's no time to eat now. - Oh, come on, man.

918. Oh, wait wait wait, what about the doll?

919. He's got it at the desk. Will you relax about that?

920. Guys, guys, we're in a hurry here.

921. - Okay, man! Which way? - Right over here.

922. - thank you, boys.

923. Our next guest tonight works as a file clerk

924. at a Cleveland hospital.

925. He also writes comic books which deal with his day-to-day

926. pains and pleasures. And this is a anthology of nine of those comics.

927. It's entitled "American splendor."

928. From off the streets of Cleveland, folks,

929. please say hello to Harvey pekar. Harvey, come out here.

930. Hi, Harvey.

931. You have to come around here, good.

932. Have a seat.

933. What do you mean calling me curious, you know?

934. I mean, I met you before the show, you know, and—

935. I meant curious in a fascinating way.

936. Oh, all right. I'll buy that.

937. A man who has has the presence of one who is quite fascinating.

938. Okay, 'cause I met you before the show,

939. - I thought you were a pretty nice guy, y'know, and then... - Yeah, I think you're—

940. I thought, you know, i might be, uh, nursing a viper in my bosom.

941. - Something like that. - You're a little defensive about this, huh?

942. Yeah, I am, man. I'm waiting for those Cleveland jokes, you know, go ahead.

943. All right, settle down, Harvey.

944. Yeah, all right, I'm doing better.

945. Now, uh, now let's explain to folks

946. who may not be familiar with your work what it is

947. you do here, exactly.

948. You have, uh, comic books about you in your daily life,

949. and you also have a regular job in Cleveland

950. - working at a hospital. - That-that's right, that's right.

951. - You know this guy? - I'm beginning to wonder.

952. if you wanted to, you could probably

953. get by on what you make selling your work.

954. Because I know people are after you to write other things,

955. and you're publishing this anthology.

956. What— who— what people, what people? What are ya talking about?

957. Where the hell do you get that stuff?

958. I know that you— you—

959. You know, that, uh, peop—

960. I'm no showbiz phony. I'm telling the truth.

961. - Now you— now you can't... - Go on, man.

962. Well, at least he's keeping up with letterman.

963. Pandering is more like it.

964. Do you, do you mean to tell me that other people

965. haven't contacted you about writing literary—

966. - Well, I mean, you know like, a... - Damn it!

967. What are ya trying to do over there?

968. I'm trying to get some news.

969. There's a big story about to break about the U.S.

970. Selling arms to Iran and the contras.

971. - Relax relax. - All right, don't worry about it.

972. Oh, finally something good. Watch this.

973. I got a job, you know?

974. I know you've got a job. I've got a job.

975. We're both very lucky. We both have jobs.

976. Well, what's the matter then?

977. - Look, man— - we gotta, we gotta go. Now now, just wait.

978. Harvey, I like you. I'm on your side.

979. I enjoy the comic books and, here, quickly,

980. - tell us about the little doll here. - My wife made it.

981. Okay. And they're— and they're, uh...

982. - what am i— am I giving you a hard time?

983. - Am I making you nervous? - No, you're not making me nervous.

984. We have to go now, and I just wanted to mention that these are for sale.

985. - Yes. - they're made out of your old clothing.

986. - That's right. - Yeah, and what do these go for?

987. - 34 bucks. - $34?

988. - $34 for this? - What are you, cheap? Are you cheaper than me?

989. Would you pay $34 for that?

990. No, but I'm not asking it, my wife is.

991. Oh, I see.

992. Such brilliant repartee.

993. - holy shit, man.

994. So what do ya think?

995. That's what i get paid for.

996. Megalomaniac.

997. hi, this is a message for Harvey pekar.

998. from the streets of Cleveland, ladies and gentlemen,

999. please welcome back the one, the only,

1000. Harvey pekar. Harvey, come on out, buddy.

1001. - Harvey...

1002. it became clear pretty fast

1003. that I was invited on the show just for laughs.

1004. You look like a lot of guys you see sleeping on buses.

1005. Sorry.

1006. It's all right, Dave, have a good time.

1007. I know, we're doing what we can, all right.

1008. It's your world, I'm just living in it.

1009. but what the hell did I care?

1010. Letterman was an okay guy.

1011. Let him take potshots at me so long as I got paid

1012. and got to plug my comics.

1013. you look like every police artist sketch I've ever seen.

1014. This is...

1015. The funny thing is,

1016. something about me and letterman clicked for the viewers.

1017. He kept wanting me back.

1018. You know, Harvey, it was about a year ago this month—

1019. that's right. No, it was last month, David.

1020. A year ago last month that you made your first appearance on the show.

1021. - Yeah, right right. - What has happened to you since?

1022. - Have you been able— - not much, David.

1023. - Harvey: Uh, it's slow going. I still have the same job.

1024. But see, Harvey, you're the embodiment of the American dream.

1025. And it wasn't just me getting all the attention.

1026. action!

1027. Are these free?

1028. Yeah?

1029. As a result of my appearances on letterman,

1030. my buddy Toby radloff landed a gig

1031. extolling the virtues of mtv.

1032. Hey, yo yo!

1033. Watch where you're going.

1034. All right, you fucking yuppie freak.

1035. Who the fuck is this on my set?

1036. Look at this.

1037. Man of the hour over here.

1038. This is my new 'do for the mtv generation.

1039. We came upon Toby radloff while doing a story in Cleveland

1040. last year on his friend, the comic artist Harvey pekar.

1041. Toby's a genuine nerd and he doesn't care

1042. if you have a problem with that.

1043. Hi, my name is Toby radloff,

1044. a genuine nerd from Cleveland, Ohio.

1045. And as you know, many hip people,

1046. including a lot of college students,

1047. are gonna be heading for spring break.

1048. But I've decided to spend my own personal spring break

1049. right here in beautiful Cleveland, Ohio.

1050. that day I had an epiphany.

1051. It seemed that real salt-of-the-earth people

1052. like Toby and me were getting co-opted

1053. by these huge corporations.

1054. We were getting held up and ridiculed as losers in the system.

1055. This is Toby radloff,

1056. a genuine spring-break party nerd, signing off.

1057. Ha ha ha ha ha.

1058. What can I say? It was the '80s, man.

1059. Harvey, are you listening to me?

1060. I've been reading about these kids who grew up

1061. in these war zones. You know, palestinians, Israelis, uh...

1062. El Salvadorians, Cambodians, and these kids are amazing.

1063. - They're coping— - hey, you're that guy from the letterman show, right?

1064. - Yeah, that's me. - That's so excellent.

1065. You and stupid pet tricks are a riot.

1066. Oh yeah?

1067. Then how about you buy one of my comics, man?

1068. It's the only reason I go on that dumb show, anyway.

1069. Right, sure.

1070. Later, Harvey pekar.

1071. - What an asshole. - So anyway, I want to write a political comic book

1072. about these kids.

1073. There's a... Listen to me.

1074. There's a conference in Jerusalem in a couple of weeks.

1075. - I'm gonna start by doing some interviews there. - Whoa whoa whoa whoa whoa.

1076. Wait a minute, what're you talking about Jerusalem?

1077. Lately, I can barely drag you off the futon

1078. to go with me to "the letterman show."

1079. - Jerusalem?

1080. - Do you wanna know why? - Yeah.

1081. Because I don't give a damn about "the letterman show."

1082. I want to do something important to me,

1083. something that matters.

1084. Hey, you know i only go on the show for the extra bread.

1085. You know, maybe if you got your lazy ass up

1086. and got yourself a job,

1087. I could do something that matters too!

1088. - Harvey, you're yelling. - You ever think of that?

1089. Don't—

1090. I'm sorry.

1091. Joyce, I'm sorry.

1092. I guess it was good to finally see Joyce

1093. excited about something of her own.

1094. This is crazy, you know. Can't you just do something here in Cleveland?

1095. Harvey, you'll survive a couple of weeks by yourself.

1096. All right. Thanks.

1097. Be careful out there, all right?

1098. I love you, baby.

1099. sure, I was happy for her,

1100. but I was still upset for me.

1101. It was later that night when I first found the lump.

1102. I was determined to put it out of my mind

1103. until Joyce got back.

1104. Easier said than done.

1105. What do I care? Just gimme the chart already.

1106. What is your problem today?

1107. Miguel, look, I just don't want to keep

1108. coming back here for it, okay?

1109. Harvey, that patient's due to be admitted a week from now.

1110. Why do you always have to go picking fights with everybody?

1111. How many times do we gotta go through the same shit?

1112. Just give me the fucking charts!

1113. - We'll see what the doctor has to say about this. - Fine!

1114. Fu...

1115. What?

1116. What do you mean, another two weeks?

1117. Jesus chri— you gotta come home sometime!

1118. Joyce?

1119. Hello?

1120. God damn it!

1121. and there you have it, folks.

1122. Another enlightening episode of stupid pet tricks.

1123. Just walk straight out to the desk,

1124. - just greet David there, okay? - I know, fine, yeah.

1125. - Are you all set? - Yeah.

1126. I was starting to lose it.

1127. Between the lump, the loneliness,

1128. I felt like everything was closing in on me.

1129. And with Joyce over there saving the world,

1130. I never felt more like a sellout hack in my life.

1131. Okay.

1132. You know, folks, if it really is true

1133. that misery loves company, our next guest must always

1134. have a house full of people.

1135. Okay, asshole, you're gonna pay for that one.

1136. You can read all about his misery in the latest edition

1137. of the comic book entitled "American splendor."

1138. Ladies and gentlemen, please welcome back Harvey pekar.

1139. Harvey, this is not the forum.

1140. This is not "meet the press."

1141. you just want me to talk about simple-minded bullshit, David.

1142. But I ain't co-opted like you, man.

1143. - I got things i want to say, man. - Oh, relax, Harvey.

1144. For instance, like, I wanna talk about a conflict- of-interest situation.

1145. - Harvey— - can we do that, David? How about that?

1146. You know, like g.E. Owning this network nbc?

1147. G.e. has basically become a military-industrial

1148. financial communications complex.

1149. Can we get the singing shih-tzu back out here, Larry? Has he left the building yet?

1150. You think nbc news is gonna cover what they do fairly? That's funny, Dave.

1151. I got other things i wanna talk about though.

1152. - That's enough, Harvey. - Just shut up, man. Don't push me, man.

1153. - I'm doing my own thing. - Harvey, this is not...

1154. Are you afraid of the truth, David? Is that what it is?

1155. - It's not what you're saying. - The truth will set you free, David.

1156. It's your choice of a venue. It may come as a shock to you, but this is a comedy show.

1157. - Not tonight, it ain't, okay? - Joe, hey, come check this out.

1158. Maybe you can take your winning personality and o out and get your own show.

1159. I don't want my own goddamn show, David.

1160. Because it seems to me we've had you on this show many many times.

1161. You sulk and complain and promote your comic book

1162. and you really haven't been very appreciative.

1163. - Well, you didn't do me any favors, Dave, okay? - Harvey—

1164. I'm still a file clerk. I have always been a file clerk.

1165. - That's enough, Harvey. - And it's no thanks to you

1166. or to your goddamn pathetic audience, man.

1167. Okay, we're gonna take a commercial,

1168. and when we come back, guess who's not gonna be here?

1169. You want me to leave, David?

1170. C'mon, ask me like a man, David.

1171. Don't hide it behind a commercial.

1172. Are things okay at home, Harvey?

1173. Things are just grand at home, Dave, okay?

1174. Goodbye, Dave. Goodbye, America.

1175. - Thanks for nothing, man. - Harvey pekar, ladies and gentlemen.

1176. - We'll be right back.

1177. I guess you really did it this time, huh?

1178. yeah, who the hell cares?

1179. That show wasn't helping my sales anyway.

1180. Baby, please don't go away anymore.

1181. I just, I can't take being alone, you know?

1182. Harvey, if you met those kids over there and you saw

1183. what they went through, you wouldn't ask that of me.

1184. I'm telling you something. If you go away again,

1185. - I'm gonna lose it. - Harvey, this is not up for discussion.

1186. I need this in my life right now.

1187. I do appreciate the fact that you missed me so much, baby.

1188. Hmm?

1189. Mm-hmm.

1190. Mmm.

1191. Harvey, what is that?

1192. I don't understand.

1193. Does tumor mean the same thing as cancer?

1194. We know the growth is malignant.

1195. What we don't know is how far it may have spread.

1196. Once we have the results we can make more informed decisions about treatment...

1197. decisions, cancer cancer.

1198. Diag-diag-diagnosis...

1199. Mri, mri, mri...

1200. Cancer, cancer, cancer, cancer, cancer...

1201. How can I have cancer?

1202. I don't feel sick at all.

1203. Well, that's a positive thing.

1204. My cousin Norman died of lymphoma.

1205. He was 29 and he was a brilliant oncologist.

1206. Stop it, you're not gonna die, Harvey. You're not.

1207. What's gonna happen to you, baby?

1208. Who's gonna take care of you if I'm not around?

1209. Harvey, look at me and focus.

1210. We are gonna get through this.

1211. I understand illness.

1212. - I know how to handle these things. - Yeah, but that's...

1213. You, you know. I'm not strong enough.

1214. I don't know how to be... positive.

1215. I can't do that. I can't do it.

1216. - Yes, you can. - No, I can't.

1217. Yes, you can.

1218. I'll tell you how.

1219. You'll make a comic book of the whole thing.

1220. You'll document every detail.

1221. And that— that way you'll remove yourself

1222. from the experience until it's over.

1223. I can't do that.

1224. I'm just not strong enough.

1225. I just want to die.

1226. That's fine, I'll do it without ya.

1227. Hey, I'm Fred.

1228. You called me about the comic book?

1229. Right, the artist.

1230. Uh, come in.

1231. This is, uh, my daughter Danielle.

1232. I had to bring her along. I hope you don't mind.

1233. Well, hi, Danielle.

1234. What's that you're holding?

1235. A pony.

1236. A pony, what's his name?

1237. She's a girl. Clarissa.

1238. Oh, I see.

1239. Well, I'm Joyce,

1240. and I'm very pleased to meet both you and Clarissa.

1241. Hey, I'm real sorry to hear about Harvey.

1242. - Is he here? - No, he's going to work

1243. until next week when he starts the chemo.

1244. But that's why I want to get this project started

1245. because once he's stuck here, i know he'll take over.

1246. Oh shit.

1247. Man.

1248. Fucking idiot, man.

1249. Hey, Joyce.

1250. Open the door!

1251. I forgot my keys again, Joyce.

1252. Hold the door, hold the door.

1253. Joyce!

1254. Open the fucking door, man!

1255. - Hey, Harvey. - ♪ but the city was gone...

1256. Fred?

1257. What the fuck's going on, man?

1258. see, i-i— I thought it was a great idea, you know.

1259. Joyce said, you know, we'd try to just follow you through your treatments.

1260. She thought it was a good idea too, didn't she?

1261. Here's some of the ideas we've been batting around. I mean...

1262. Jesus, we—

1263. Joyce has no idea what she's doing, man.

1264. There's too many words in these frames.

1265. When are you coming back, Fred?

1266. Oh, uh...

1267. She said something about next Tuesday, which is...

1268. It's fine with me, it's just the only thing is

1269. I might have the kid again.

1270. See, my ex-wife is supposed to take her

1271. but I don't have much faith in her showing up.

1272. She's in worse shape than me these days, so.

1273. Rub it around.

1274. Next week my... My treatment begins.

1275. Do me a favor, man, bring the kid, will you?

1276. Okay.

1277. Harvey, what are you doing?

1278. Stop it, stop it, stop it.

1279. you're doing this on purpose, purpose, purpose...

1280. i don't care, man.

1281. Thanks.

1282. - I wanna die.

1283. Just let me die, just let me die...

1284. Joyce.

1285. - Joyce. - what?

1286. What's wrong, Harvey?

1287. What're you doing up?

1288. What is it?

1289. Tell me the truth.

1290. Am I...

1291. Am I a guy who writes about himself

1292. in a comic book?

1293. Or am I just...

1294. Am I just a character in that book?

1295. What are you talking about? What are you saying?

1296. If I die, will that character keep going?

1297. Or will he just fade away?

1298. - Harvey!

1299. Harvey!

1300. Harvey. Oh my god. Harvey, wake up!

1301. Wake up, Harvey, c'mon!

1302. Harvey? oh no no no. C'mon, wake up.

1303. Harvey, can you hear me?

1304. My name is Harvey pekar.

1305. Now that's an unusual name, Harvey pekar.

1306. 1960 was the year i got my first apartment

1307. and my first phone book.

1308. Now imagine my surprise when I looked up my name

1309. and saw that in addition to me,

1310. another Harvey pekar was listed.

1311. Now I was listed as "Harvey l. Pekar."

1312. - My middle name is Lawrence.

1313. He was listed as "Harvey pekar."

1314. Therefore his was a purer listing.

1315. Then in the '70s,

1316. I noticed that a third Harvey pekar

1317. was listed in the phone book.

1318. Now this filled me with curiosity.

1319. How could there be three people with such

1320. an unusual name in the world, let alone in one city?

1321. Then one day a person I work with

1322. expressed her sympathy to me

1323. concerning what she thought was the death of my father.

1324. And she pointed out an obituary notice

1325. in the newspaper for a man named Harvey pekar.

1326. And one of his sons was named Harvey.

1327. These were the other Harvey pekars.

1328. Then six months later, Harvey pekar Jr. died.

1329. Although I'd met neither man,

1330. I was filled with sadness.

1331. What were they like? I thought.

1332. It seemed our lives had been linked in some indefinable way.

1333. But the story does not end there.

1334. For two years later,

1335. another Harvey pekar appeared in the phone book.

1336. Who are these people?

1337. Where do they come from?

1338. What do they do?

1339. What's in a name?

1340. Who is Harvey pekar?

1341. You know, we've got the t-shirts for sale

1342. upstairs if you're interested.

1343. Yeah, c'mon, man.

1344. here's our man, a year later.

1345. Somehow I made it through the treatments

1346. and the doctors are optimistic.

1347. I guess Joyce was right about doing a big comic book.

1348. We published the thing as a graphic novel.

1349. Our first collaboration,

1350. and ended up with rave reviews.

1351. We even won a couple of national book awards.

1352. Go figure.

1353. Bye.

1354. those are beautiful. Did you find those in there?

1355. - Danielle: mm-hm. - I didn't even see those. Let me see.

1356. - I like these flowers. - Are you finished?

1357. Oh, Danielle, I love it, very expressive colors.

1358. - Hey, Joyce. - What is it, Harvey?

1359. That was the doctor.

1360. He says I'm all clear.

1361. the weirdest thing that came out of my illness was Danielle.

1362. With her real mother running around who-knows-where,

1363. - and seeing how well her and Joyce got on...

1364. Fred decided she'd have a better life with us.

1365. I was scared at first, but then I thought, "what the hell?

1366. - She's a good kid." - Joyce: Hi, Harvey.

1367. So we ended up taking her and raising her as our own.

1368. You keep reading 'em backwards.

1369. I like reading them backwards.

1370. Is that one you?

1371. I keep telling you, all of 'em's me, man.

1372. You look like a monster.

1373. Yeah well, you know.

1374. - Wait till you see what you're gonna look like. - Me?

1375. Yeah, you're part of the story too now.

1376. What story?

1377. The story of my life.

1378. Oh.

1379. Yeah, I know I'm not as interesting as "the little mermaid"

1380. and all that— all that magical crap.

1381. I think I'm gonna write my own comic.

1382. Oh yeah, what about?

1383. I'm not sure yet, but not about you.

1384. I think you have enough already.

1385. You know,

1386. you should write about things in your own life.

1387. You know, like school, and, uh...

1388. Ponies, you know, i don't know, girl stuff.

1389. Do you have to hold my hand?

1390. What, are you embarrassed of me?

1391. I know, I know, I know. I'm embarrassing.

1392. I felt the same way about my father.

1393. No, Harvey, it's just when you hold my hand,

1394. you squeeze it too hard.

1395. Okay, go on.

1396. Joyce is right, you are obsessive-compulsive.

1397. go on.

1398. yeah, so I guess comics brought me a lot.

1399. But don't think this is some sunny, happy ending.

1400. Every day is still a major struggle.

1401. Joyce and I fight like crazy.

1402. And she barely works.

1403. The kid's got a.D.D. And is a real handful.

1404. My life is total chaos.

1405. With a little luck,

1406. I'll get a window of good health

1407. between retiring and dying.

1408. The golden years, right?

1409. Who knows, between my pension

1410. and the chunk of change I get for this film,

1411. I should be able to swing something.

1412. Sure, I'll lose the war eventually,

1413. but the goal is to win a few skirmishes along the way,

1414. right?

1415. surprise!

1416. - All: surprise.