1. The tank itself was unusual
in that it was vertical...Copy !req
2. and looked like an old boiler.Copy !req
3. Inside the tank,
the subject wore a heavy glass bubble.Copy !req
4. You would have thought the whole
contraption uncomfortable to say the least.Copy !req
5. It was, however, effective.Copy !req
6. Of the 23 students tested,
only two found the experience unpleasant.Copy !req
7. Some even called it exhilarating.
A number of students hallucinated.Copy !req
8. Dr. Jessup found the encephalographic
evidence especially interesting.Copy !req
9. And one Saturday afternoon,
in April 1967...Copy !req
10. he decided to try
the experience for himself.Copy !req
11. Arthur. Hey, Arthur.Copy !req
12. Are you there?Copy !req
13. Can you hear me, Arthur?Copy !req
14. Arthur, answer me.Copy !req
15. Is that it? You want me
to come in and get you out?Copy !req
16. Yeah.Copy !req
17. I want to get a look at those EEG tracings.Copy !req
18. All right. How do you feel?Copy !req
19. Not bad.Copy !req
20. I hallucinated like a son of a bitch.Copy !req
21. A variety of dream states,
mystical states.Copy !req
22. A lot of religious allegory,
mostly out of Revelation.Copy !req
23. You were in there close to five hours.Copy !req
24. - It felt like an hour.
- I'd like to try that myself sometime.Copy !req
25. You should. You'll like it.Copy !req
26. Did we have any communication?Copy !req
27. Oh, sure. I kept checking you out
like you told me to.Copy !req
28. How'd I respond?Copy !req
29. Very orderly.
At one point you were crying.Copy !req
30. You mean actually crying?Copy !req
31. You were sobbing.
There were tears on your face.Copy !req
32. When I asked you what was going on...Copy !req
33. you said you were re-experiencing
your father's death.Copy !req
34. - Did you make notes?
- It's all there.Copy !req
35. I'd like to try this again next week.Copy !req
36. Do you think you could make it again
next week?Copy !req
37. What are we looking for?Copy !req
38. I don't know, yet.Copy !req
39. There's really very little literature
on this kind of research.Copy !req
40. There's some good people in the field,
Tart, Ornstein and Deikman...Copy !req
41. but most of it is radical-hip stuff,
drug-culture apologias.Copy !req
42. Obviously, the first thing to do
is set up some sensible methodology.Copy !req
43. Study these experiences
under controlled conditions.Copy !req
44. It won't interfere with the work
we're doing with Hobart.Copy !req
45. What are we getting into? A new
sensory deprivation? Isolation studies?Copy !req
46. Where will we be going
with the tank stuff?Copy !req
47. We're not writing up a grant.
Strictly bootlegging, for kicks.Copy !req
48. As long as we've got
the use of this tank...Copy !req
49. let's play around with it.
Let's find out where it takes us.Copy !req
50. It's fascinating stuff, Arthur.
I think we ought to get into it.Copy !req
51. I didn't even know they had one of those
isolation tanks at New York Hospital.Copy !req
52. Must be some guy
in the psychology department...Copy !req
53. doing sensory deprivation studies.Copy !req
54. What's Jessup doing with it?Copy !req
55. You've got me. He's been taking students
out of his classes and testing them.Copy !req
56. He's been doing this
for three, four months.Copy !req
57. - Did you know...
Arthur.Copy !req
58. - ... Jessup was into this stuff?
- Not until you told me.Copy !req
59. Arthur?
- What do you want, honey?Copy !req
60. How long are you going to let it ring?Copy !req
61. It's okay, I'll get it.Copy !req
62. He's the last guy
to be screwing around...Copy !req
63. with anything as flaky
as altered states of consciousness.Copy !req
64. Well, let's face it.
Jessup is pretty flaky himself.Copy !req
65. That's him.Copy !req
66. Arthur says you're very shy.
He wants me to draw you out.Copy !req
67. Draw me out?
That doesn't sound like Arthur.Copy !req
68. Well, what he actually said was
you were a high-handed, arrogant prick.Copy !req
69. A little nuts, but brilliant...Copy !req
70. and that if I ever got you talking,
I would find you fascinating.Copy !req
71. That sounds more like Arthur.Copy !req
72. He says you're doing some work
at Payne Whitney.Copy !req
73. - Yes.
- What sort of work?Copy !req
74. Toxic metabolite stuff, replicating
Heath's and Friedhoff's strategies...Copy !req
75. to find maverick substances
specific to schizophrenia.Copy !req
76. We're chasing our tails. What do you do?Copy !req
77. I'm a physical anthropologist,
sweating out my dissertation.Copy !req
78. - Where?
- Columbia.Copy !req
79. Holloway and that bunch.Copy !req
80. You're kind of young for a Ph.D.,
aren't you?Copy !req
81. - I'm 24.
- That's still pretty good.Copy !req
82. I didn't get my Ph.D. until
I was 25 and I'm supposed to be a whiz kid.Copy !req
83. I'm a whiz kid, too.Copy !req
84. Anthropology seems to attract
good-looking women.Copy !req
85. So you don't think schizophrenia can be
reduced to a single etiological agent?Copy !req
86. I'm not even sure it's a disease.Copy !req
87. You think madness is simply
another state of consciousness?Copy !req
88. There's a body of evidence
to support that.Copy !req
89. You don't like to talk
about your work, do you?Copy !req
90. As a rule, no.Copy !req
91. I've always been interested
in interior experiences.Copy !req
92. Especially religious experience.Copy !req
93. The reason I'm working
with schizophrenics...Copy !req
94. is that religious experience
is so significant in schizophrenia.Copy !req
95. There's only so much
you can do with animals.Copy !req
96. Monkeys can't tell you what's going on
in their consciousness.Copy !req
97. You need human beings for that.Copy !req
98. You're not allowed to ablate humans,
you can't stick electrodes in their skulls.Copy !req
99. I have to use some kind
of trance-inducing technique.Copy !req
100. The isolation tank
seemed the least risky. Listen...Copy !req
101. I'd like to go home with you tonight.
Would that be all right with you?Copy !req
102. I've got a roommate.
We'll be confined to the living-room couch.Copy !req
103. What's wrong
with the living-room couch?Copy !req
104. You tend to slip off a lot.Copy !req
105. I'm sure we'll manage.Copy !req
106. Yeah, I'm sure we will.Copy !req
107. So whenever you want to go there,
you let me know.Copy !req
108. - How about right now?
- Heh.Copy !req
109. What are you thinking about?Copy !req
110. God.Copy !req
111. Jesus, crucifixions.Copy !req
112. As a rule, do you usually think about...Copy !req
113. Christ and crucifixions
under sexual stress?Copy !req
114. When I was 9 years old,
I used to see visions.Copy !req
115. Visions of saints and angels,
even Christ himself.Copy !req
116. Of course, I don't do that anymore.Copy !req
117. Not since I was 16.Copy !req
118. Were your parents religious?Copy !req
119. Anything but.Copy !req
120. My father was an aeronautical engineer.
My mother, a clinical psychologist.Copy !req
121. What happened?Copy !req
122. I mean, how did a little kid who saw
visions of Christ turn into a physiologist...Copy !req
123. - ... teaching at the Cornell Medical College?
- I stopped believing.Copy !req
124. It was very dramatic.Copy !req
125. My father died a protracted
and painful death of cancer.Copy !req
126. I was 16 years old
and very fond of my father.Copy !req
127. I used to race to the hospital
every day after school...Copy !req
128. and sit in his room doing my homework.Copy !req
129. He was very heavily sedated.Copy !req
130. The last few weeks he was in coma.Copy !req
131. One day I thought
I heard him say something.Copy !req
132. I got up and leaned over him...Copy !req
133. my ear an inch away from his lips.Copy !req
134. "Did you say something, Pop?"Copy !req
135. Then I heard the word he was desperately
trying to say, a soft hiss of a word.Copy !req
136. He was saying:Copy !req
137. "Terrible."Copy !req
138. "Terrible."Copy !req
139. So the end was terrible,
even for the good people like my father.Copy !req
140. So the purpose of all our suffering
was just more suffering.Copy !req
141. By dinnertime, I had dispensed with God
altogether. I never saw another vision.Copy !req
142. I haven't told anybody
about this in 10 years.Copy !req
143. I'm telling you now
because I want you to know...Copy !req
144. what sort of a nut
you might be getting mixed up with.Copy !req
145. Arthur was right.Copy !req
146. You are a fascinating bastard.Copy !req
147. Dad! Dad! Dad!Copy !req
148. - Hi.
- Hi.Copy !req
149. Well, it's settled.Copy !req
150. Metcalfe spoke to Spencer this morning
and it's definite. The job's mine.Copy !req
151. I'll be in Nairobi doing
my post-doc work July and August.Copy !req
152. And in September,
I'll be teaching at Harvard.Copy !req
153. Terrific.Copy !req
154. So looks like we'll both be teaching
at Harvard in September.Copy !req
155. Looks that way.Copy !req
156. Well, you can't get any tidier
than that, can you?Copy !req
157. We're gonna be together in Boston,
and I think we should get married.Copy !req
158. You know, of course,
I'm supposed to be a little bit nuts.Copy !req
159. A little bit?
You're an unmitigated madman.Copy !req
160. You don't have to tell me how weird
you are. I know how weird you are.Copy !req
161. I'm the girl in your bed
the past two months.Copy !req
162. Even sex is a mystical experience
for you. You carry on like a flagellant...Copy !req
163. which can be very nice, but I sometimes
wonder if it's me that's being made love to.Copy !req
164. I feel like I'm being harpooned by some
raging monk in the act of receiving God.Copy !req
165. And you are a Faust-freak, Eddie.Copy !req
166. You'd sell your soul
to find the great truth.Copy !req
167. Well, human life
doesn't have great truths.Copy !req
168. We're born in doubt. We spend our lives
persuading ourselves we're alive.Copy !req
169. And one way we do that is
we love each other, like I love you.Copy !req
170. I can't imagine living without you.Copy !req
171. So let's get married, and if it turns out
to be a disaster, it'll be a disaster.Copy !req
172. We'll shake hands and say good-bye.Copy !req
173. He's giving her dimethyltryptamine.Copy !req
174. It takes effect in about a minute
and she'll trip out for about half an hour.Copy !req
175. Do you feel different now?Copy !req
176. Yes.Copy !req
177. Less anxious?Copy !req
178. Much less.Copy !req
179. Do you have any special feelings?Copy !req
180. I feel...Copy !req
181. like my heart
is being touched by Christ.Copy !req
182. There's a lot of religious delusion
among acute schizophrenics.Copy !req
183. Some say schizophrenics
are physically different from the rest of us.Copy !req
184. It's almost as if they were trying
to change their physical selves...Copy !req
185. to adapt to their schizophrenic image
of themselves.Copy !req
186. All right, we'll get married,
since it's that important to you.Copy !req
187. I'm not comfortable with women...Copy !req
188. and I'm not likely to find anyone
half as remarkable as you again.Copy !req
189. I think I can make
a reasonably good husband.Copy !req
190. I don't want to lose you, you see.Copy !req
191. I suppose that's the closest thing
to a declaration of love...Copy !req
192. that I will ever get out of you.Copy !req
193. Am I really that weird in bed?Copy !req
194. Sometimes.Copy !req
195. Shall I try to change?Copy !req
196. No, I kind of like it.Copy !req
197. Daddy, I'm tired.
We'll give the lady a ride.Copy !req
198. - Whoa! Oh!
Hey, Mason, be careful.Copy !req
199. How you doing, Eddie?
- Hi, Mason. How about a beer?Copy !req
200. - if I didn't see this, I wouldn't believe it.
- You weren't supposed to be here.Copy !req
201. Hi, what's your name?
My name's Mason Parrish. This is Margaret.Copy !req
202. Mason, Arthur Rosenberg
I'm always telling you about.Copy !req
203. - How are you?
- Mason Parrish, nice to meet you.Copy !req
204. Look at the family man.
Oh, why, Eddie, you look so wonderful.Copy !req
205. I don't believe it.
Not again. When did this happen?Copy !req
206. - It's a long story.
- You look wonderful.Copy !req
207. Have you found a place yet?Copy !req
208. We got a nice little place
near Huntington Field.Copy !req
209. It's been seven years
since we moved to San Francisco.Copy !req
210. Arthur's gonna to teach at Boston U.
Eddie's been telling me.Copy !req
211. I hear you just got associate professor.Copy !req
212. You guys must be loaded.
Two professors in one family.Copy !req
213. We've got a place in Maine
you can use for the summer.Copy !req
214. I'm going to Africa again.
Eddie'll be in Mexico.Copy !req
215. You know a guy named Eccheverria,
University of Mexico?Copy !req
216. - He worked with you in California.
- Sure. Bright young guy.Copy !req
217. He's here at the museum.
We'll all have to get together.Copy !req
218. I'm going back to Mexico
with him in June.Copy !req
219. What's in Mexico?Copy !req
220. Eccheverria's got this witch doctor
down there, the Hinchi Indians.Copy !req
221. They're an isolated tribe in Central Mexico
who practice ancient Toltec rituals.Copy !req
222. Sacred mushroom ceremonies,
that kind of thing.Copy !req
223. Apparently they use some kind
of hallucinatory drug...Copy !req
224. that is supposed to evoke
a common experience in all users.Copy !req
225. Maggie's fallen asleep on the couch.
Will you take care of her?Copy !req
226. Sure.Copy !req
227. Did you ever get into an isolation tank
since New York?Copy !req
228. No. Did you?Copy !req
229. No, but they've got one here
at the medical school.Copy !req
230. I didn't think anybody was doing
those studies anymore.Copy !req
231. We did interesting stuff
in that tank in New York...Copy !req
232. for the months we played with it.Copy !req
233. Maybe when I get back from Mexico
we'll get into it again.Copy !req
234. Why not.Copy !req
235. A terrific housekeeper she's not.Copy !req
236. - They're getting a divorce, you know.
- Who?Copy !req
237. - I don't know if they're actually—
- What are you talking about?Copy !req
238. She and the kids are moving to Cambridge.
That's why this place is such a mess.Copy !req
239. They're moving her stuff
into storage tomorrow.Copy !req
240. Then she's going off to Africa
for a year with the kids...Copy !req
241. and he's going to Mexico.Copy !req
242. When she comes back, she's gonna live
in Cambridge and he's staying here.Copy !req
243. It's him wants the divorce, not her.Copy !req
244. I'm surprised
they stayed together this long.Copy !req
245. When did all this happen?Copy !req
246. She just told me five minutes ago.Copy !req
247. What about all those letters she kept
writing us about how happy they were?Copy !req
248. Don't ask me. She's still crazy about him.
He's still crazy.Copy !req
249. - Listen, Sylvia just—
- Shh.Copy !req
250. Sylvia just told me
you're getting a divorce.Copy !req
251. Well, we're getting separated.Copy !req
252. We won't get to the divorce
until next year.Copy !req
253. Well, look, I mean, I know
it's none of my business, but why?Copy !req
254. You are married to a great woman
who adores you.Copy !req
255. My God, if anybody has it made,
you have.Copy !req
256. You are a respected
and an admired figure.Copy !req
257. A full professor on the faculty
of the Harvard Medical School.Copy !req
258. For God's sake, is that how you imagine
me? A respected and admired figure?Copy !req
259. A devoted father? A loving husband?Copy !req
260. I've also published nearly two papers
a year for the last seven years...Copy !req
261. and not a fundamental piece of work
in the lot.Copy !req
262. I sit around the living rooms
of other young married faculty members...Copy !req
263. talking infantile masturbation:
"Who's sucking up...Copy !req
264. to the head of the department?"
"Whose tenure is hanging by a thread?"Copy !req
265. Emily is content to go on with this life.Copy !req
266. She insists she's in love with me,
whatever that is.Copy !req
267. What she means is
she prefers the senseless pain...Copy !req
268. we inflict on each other to the pain
we would otherwise inflict on ourselves.Copy !req
269. But I'm not afraid of that solitary pain.Copy !req
270. If I don't strip myself of all this clatter
and clutter and ridiculous ritual...Copy !req
271. I shall go out of my fucking mind.Copy !req
272. - Does that answer your question, Arthur?
- What question was that?Copy !req
273. - You asked me why I was getting divorced.
- Oh, listen, it's your life.Copy !req
274. I'm sorry I even asked.Copy !req
275. Listen...Copy !req
276. why don't I call Eccheverria
and we'll all go out and have some dinner?Copy !req
277. As a matter of fact, Eduardo,
my year in India was disappointing.Copy !req
278. Yoga is still a state-specific technology...Copy !req
279. operating in the service
of an a priori belief system.Copy !req
280. We scientists have a moral obligation to
the public as well as to our own research.Copy !req
281. It just never occurred to baboons
that they could shorten that time...Copy !req
282. to five minutes if they used a stick.Copy !req
283. Originally, man was just another
savanna-living primate like the baboon.Copy !req
284. What dignifies the yogic practices...Copy !req
285. is that the belief system itself
is not truly religious.Copy !req
286. There is no Buddhist God, per se.Copy !req
287. It is the self, the individual mind, that
contains immortality and ultimate truth.Copy !req
288. What is not religious about that?Copy !req
289. You've simply replaced God
with the original self.Copy !req
290. But we've localized it. We know
where the self is, in our minds.Copy !req
291. It's a form of human energy.
Our atoms are six billion years old.Copy !req
292. We've got six billion years
of memory in our minds.Copy !req
293. - Hydrogen atoms are older—
- Memory is energy.Copy !req
294. It doesn't disappear. It's still in there.Copy !req
295. There's a physiological pathway
to our earlier consciousnesses.Copy !req
296. There has to be. I'm telling you,
it's in the limbic system.Copy !req
297. Jessup, you are a wacko.Copy !req
298. What's wacko about it?
I'm a man in search of his true self.Copy !req
299. - How archetypically American can you get?
- Ha, ha, ha.Copy !req
300. Everybody's looking for their true selves.
We're all trying to fulfill ourselves...Copy !req
301. understand ourselves,
get in touch with ourselves...Copy !req
302. face the reality of ourselves,
explore ourselves, expand ourselves.Copy !req
303. Ever since we dispensed with God...Copy !req
304. we've got nothing but ourselves
to explain this meaningless horror of life.Copy !req
305. You're a wacko.Copy !req
306. Well, I think that that true self...Copy !req
307. that original self, that first self,
is a real, mensurate, quantifiable thing...Copy !req
308. tangible and incarnate...Copy !req
309. and I'm going to find the fucker.Copy !req
310. What are their chemical properties?
Are they safe?Copy !req
311. The mushrooms
are almost certainly Amanita muscaria...Copy !req
312. a very powerful psychedelic,
and a little dangerous.Copy !req
313. It contains belladonna-like alkaloids...Copy !req
314. atropine, scopolamine.Copy !req
315. The sinicuichi plant is highly regarded...Copy !req
316. among a number of Indian tribes.
I've seen it as far north as Chihuahua.Copy !req
317. The Indians say it evokes old memories.Copy !req
318. Even ancient ones.Copy !req
319. And the Hinchis call it the first flower.Copy !req
320. - The first in the sense of primordial?
- Yes.Copy !req
321. In the sense of the most ancient.Copy !req
322. I'd like to try it.Copy !req
323. Do you think they'd let me
join their ritual?Copy !req
324. Well, they seem like agreeable people.Copy !req
325. It's all right for you
to participate in the ceremony.Copy !req
326. Good. Ask him what kind of an experience
I can expect.Copy !req
327. Are they gathering mushrooms
for the ritual?Copy !req
328. No, they're being
harvested for next year.Copy !req
329. Brujo!Copy !req
330. Your soul will return to the first soul.Copy !req
331. Ask him what this first soul will look like.Copy !req
332. He is unborn stuff.Copy !req
333. Then you will propel into the void.Copy !req
334. You will see a spot.Copy !req
335. Uh, the spot will become a crack.Copy !req
336. This is the crack between the nothing...Copy !req
337. and out of this nothing
will come your unborn soul.Copy !req
338. He wants you to hold the root.
Put out your hand with the palm up.Copy !req
339. Ah! Ugh!Copy !req
340. Eduardo!Copy !req
341. - Jesus Christ.
- Are you all right?Copy !req
342. - We only have their word I killed a lizard.
- Oh, no.Copy !req
343. You didn't see it
and I have no recollection of it.Copy !req
344. This whole business is just a joke
the Indians have played on me...Copy !req
345. to make the gringo look like a fool.Copy !req
346. Look, you asked me what happened
and I told you.Copy !req
347. You drank the mixture
and you went outside.Copy !req
348. After a while there was a scream
and some dogs were barking.Copy !req
349. I started after you.Copy !req
350. The screaming stopped
and the brujo yelled to come back.Copy !req
351. - Oh, bullshit.
- Then why did you ask the brujo...Copy !req
352. to give you the mixture
to take back to Boston?Copy !req
353. I thought I'd like Arthur to analyze,
maybe synthesize it.Copy !req
354. The noise is stupefying.Copy !req
355. The sun became black...Copy !req
356. as sackcloth.Copy !req
357. The full moon became like blood.Copy !req
358. Then the great mountain,
burning with fire...Copy !req
359. was thrown into the sea.Copy !req
360. And the beast ascends
from the bottomless pit.Copy !req
361. The angel of the bottomless pit.
His name is Abaddon.Copy !req
362. Abaddon.Copy !req
363. He is off the wall.
Are you okay?Copy !req
364. Get this stuff. It's new.Copy !req
365. It's deafening. The noise is deafening.Copy !req
366. Can you hear me above this noise?Copy !req
367. Oh, my God.
The most unbelievable thing I've seen.Copy !req
368. I'm watching the birth agony
of a mountain.Copy !req
369. Oh, my God.
Are you okay?Copy !req
370. I'm fine. Really, I'm fine.Copy !req
371. Do you want me to bring you down now?Copy !req
372. What happens now?Copy !req
373. He's blacked-out.
His blackouts can get pretty freaky.Copy !req
374. Sometimes they last
as long as four hours.Copy !req
375. When he comes out, he's chipper
as a bird but doesn't remember a thing.Copy !req
376. Just how dangerous is this stuff
he brought back from Mexico?Copy !req
377. I didn't say dangerous, I said it
was weird. Hangs around too long.Copy !req
378. And what's really screwy is
it heads straight for the brain.Copy !req
379. Well, I don't believe this.Copy !req
380. You guys are shooting up an untested
drug that stacks up in the brain...Copy !req
381. works in the nucleus of the cell,
and don't call that dangerous?Copy !req
382. For the record,
we don't actually shoot up.Copy !req
383. - Heh, heh, heh.
- Eddie drinks a 10—Copy !req
384. It's gonna stop now.Copy !req
385. You guys are supposed to be scientists,
not two kids in the dorm...Copy !req
386. freaking out on Mexican mushrooms.Copy !req
387. Well, why do you think I called you for?
Let's see you stop him.Copy !req
388. This ain't LSD, goddamn it.Copy !req
389. This ain't no serotonin antagonist
you're drinking.Copy !req
390. How many grams of that
you think you've already got in you?Copy !req
391. Two? Three?Copy !req
392. You could be working up
a case of cancer...Copy !req
393. with a truckload
of antimetabolites in you.Copy !req
394. The Hinchi Indians have done it
for centuries with no cancer.Copy !req
395. Fuck the Hinchi Indians.Copy !req
396. You don't know anything
about those mushrooms.Copy !req
397. Sounds like they have staying power.Copy !req
398. We've shot up 30 rats with that stuff.Copy !req
399. Some of them have
a whopping load in them.Copy !req
400. None of them have been
noticeably affected.Copy !req
401. Where are we going now?
I thought we were gonna eat.Copy !req
402. Eddie wants to show me an isolation tank.Copy !req
403. Isolation tank. You guys get flakier
every time I talk to you.Copy !req
404. All that isolation-tank stuff
went out in the '60s...Copy !req
405. with Timothy Leary
and all them other gurus.Copy !req
406. Will you shut up for a minute
and let somebody else say something?Copy !req
407. What happens during these
blackouts...Copy !req
408. is you feel phenomenal acceleration...Copy !req
409. like you're being shot out over millions,
billions of years.Copy !req
410. Time simply obliterates.Copy !req
411. You sense the hallucination is going on,
but you get no images.Copy !req
412. I want to break through that barrier.Copy !req
413. I want to know what those images are
that I know are going on but I can't see.Copy !req
414. We can't raise the dosage of the drug,
we're close to toxic level now.Copy !req
415. The only way to intensify the experience
is to take the 200 milligrams...Copy !req
416. in conjunction with the tank.Copy !req
417. There's more I'd like to do to that drug.Copy !req
418. - A half-life determination.
That'd take a year.Copy !req
419. I'd like to know
the transport system. Find some analogues.Copy !req
420. All I know is this stuff
is an extraordinary substance.Copy !req
421. Every instinct I have tells me
I'm onto something hot here.Copy !req
422. And another 200 milligrams
isn't going to kill anybody.Copy !req
423. There it is.Copy !req
424. Oh, it's horizontal.Copy !req
425. It's smaller than the one
we had in New York.Copy !req
426. if they do sleep studies,
it must be wired for sound.Copy !req
427. Don't think anybody's used it in
years, but I checked it, it works.Copy !req
428. Won't take a week
to get this functioning.Copy !req
429. If it ever gets out you use
an untested drug on human subjects—Copy !req
430. Don't worry. Nothing's gonna
happen to me. Let's get a hamburger.Copy !req
431. - Told one kid in class I might see her.
- All right.Copy !req
432. Do what you want to do.
I think you're both irresponsible as hell.Copy !req
433. Don't call me and tell me you're worried
about Eddie putting all this shit into him.Copy !req
434. I tell you now, don't you put
any more of that shit into him...Copy !req
435. until you know more about it.Copy !req
436. I've offered you the use of my lab
and all the rats you can cut.Copy !req
437. That's as much as I want to be implicated
in your experiments.Copy !req
438. You get your own dumb hamburger.Copy !req
439. I already got my own date
I'm an hour late for.Copy !req
440. I already did these first three.
You do the rest.Copy !req
441. Well, well, well.Copy !req
442. Couldn't resist, right?Copy !req
443. Well, somebody's gotta keep
on eye on you two sorcerers.Copy !req
444. What have you got in there,
some salt solution?Copy !req
445. Ten percent magnesium sulfate,
for buoyancy.Copy !req
446. - Weird, man.
- Excuse me, Mason.Copy !req
447. One, two, three, four.Copy !req
448. One, two, three, four.Copy !req
449. Okay, you're fine.Copy !req
450. Wednesday, January 7, 4:28 p.m.Copy !req
451. Hey, this is terrific.Copy !req
452. I'm on a plateau.Copy !req
453. Went into beta like a shot.
No spindling, nothing.Copy !req
454. Grasslands, savannas.Copy !req
455. I feel...Copy !req
456. I am actually alive
and inside this landscape.Copy !req
457. A density of woodlands
about a mile away.Copy !req
458. Beyond that,
mountains that seem to be smoking.Copy !req
459. Newly born mountains,
Cenozoic, latter Tertiary.Copy !req
460. I'm in an edge area.Copy !req
461. Utter tranquility, but alive.Copy !req
462. Life in the trees. Life in the sedge.Copy !req
463. Oh, my God...Copy !req
464. the birth of man. That's got to be it.Copy !req
465. My God. There it is...Copy !req
466. a protohuman.Copy !req
467. The first and original truly human form.Copy !req
468. Tiny, perhaps four feet high,
completely furred...Copy !req
469. chimp-like, but erect.
No knuckle-walking. Shorter arms.Copy !req
470. He's moving along so gracefully.Copy !req
471. There's two, three of them.Copy !req
472. Bipedal, tiny, little furred
humanoid creatures.Copy !req
473. Got a chunk of lava
in their hands. They're...Copy !req
474. stalking or hunting something.Copy !req
475. For chrissake.Copy !req
476. Are you okay, Eddie?Copy !req
477. I'm becoming one of them.
I'm no longer observing.Copy !req
478. I'm one of them.Copy !req
479. I'm killing— I'm killing a goat.Copy !req
480. I'm killing...Copy !req
481. I'm eating...Copy !req
482. I'm eating the blood, hot flesh of a goat.Copy !req
483. Are you okay?Copy !req
484. Ho, ho, ho. Beautiful. Beautiful.Copy !req
485. - Do you want to come down?
- No.Copy !req
486. It sounded like he was having
a bad trip to me.Copy !req
487. Some of these tank trips
can get pretty creepy.Copy !req
488. What the hell was that?Copy !req
489. You okay?Copy !req
490. Beautiful.Copy !req
491. - Do you want to stop this?
- No.Copy !req
492. - Do you want me to leave you alone?
- Yeah.Copy !req
493. I thought you said these things don't last
more than four hours.Copy !req
494. - It's quarter to 9.
- He's coming out.Copy !req
495. I don't like being out of contact
for these long periods of time.Copy !req
496. I think he's in shock.Copy !req
497. He must have had a seizure,
hit his head or something.Copy !req
498. Now, hold on.Copy !req
499. What do you want blood tests for?Copy !req
500. - What's he say?
- "Buccal smear, blood for a karyotype...Copy !req
501. also pictures for
the Goodman and Sarich's lab.Copy !req
502. Pictures of my neck, now, before I ...Copy !req
503. - ... reconstitute."
- Before he what?Copy !req
504. Before he reconstitutes.Copy !req
505. Then take his damn blood,
and maybe he'll let me have a look at him.Copy !req
506. Do you mind if I examine your neck
for a minute?Copy !req
507. - Any masses?
- No.Copy !req
508. Oh, stop talking shit.Copy !req
509. You trying to say
your hallucination externalized?Copy !req
510. - What did he write?
- "Not common aphasia.Copy !req
511. Time-space fallout
from the hallucination."Copy !req
512. You are a fucking flake, Jessup.Copy !req
513. Get dressed.
I'm gonna take you to Brigham...Copy !req
514. and do a complete workup on you.Copy !req
515. You are a very sick dude,
you dumb son of a bitch.Copy !req
516. I'll look down your throat,
do some films...Copy !req
517. get a CAT scan,
maybe an arteriogram...Copy !req
518. and I'd like an unbiased eye
to look at those EEG tracings.Copy !req
519. What's he say?Copy !req
520. "X-ray."Copy !req
521. All right, finish up with him, Arthur,
and let's get him over to x-ray.Copy !req
522. Be right back.Copy !req
523. Is it possible it's mechanical?Copy !req
524. Well, if it isn't neurological,
it's got to be mechanical.Copy !req
525. I'd like some plain films of this guy's neck.
A PA, a lateral and oblique.Copy !req
526. - Doctor, I'm backed up to my ass.
- Just take the damn pictures.Copy !req
527. - This is an emergency.
- Okay.Copy !req
528. Might be a TIA.Copy !req
529. I guess we'd better not
tell Eddie he had...Copy !req
530. blood all over his face when he came
out of the tank. He'll claim it was...Copy !req
531. goat's blood from that goat
he was eating in his hallucination.Copy !req
532. You know, you're really getting
as weird as he is.Copy !req
533. Well, what do you think happened?Copy !req
534. He's not the type
for hysterical conversion.Copy !req
535. I'm thinking seizure.Copy !req
536. He came out of that tank in a fugue state
and had blood all over his face.Copy !req
537. He must have had a seizure
while in the tank...Copy !req
538. bit his lip while convulsing,
and is postictally aphasic.Copy !req
539. I thought maybe he had a vascular insult,
a stroke, a flipped embolus...Copy !req
540. but neurologically he's intact,
so I'm thinking seizure now.Copy !req
541. Hm.Copy !req
542. Now you just take it easy.Copy !req
543. None of us are so terrific
at reading x-rays.Copy !req
544. What are you looking for?Copy !req
545. Put these in an envelope.
Who's reading tonight in Radiology?Copy !req
546. Dr. Wissenschaft.Copy !req
547. I want someone reliable to look at them.Copy !req
548. I'd rather not have everyone in on this.Copy !req
549. It's bad enough we've got
this x-ray technician.Copy !req
550. Are you all right?Copy !req
551. I'm fine. I tried to indicate
this was just a transient thing.Copy !req
552. A transient ischemic attack,
that's what it was.Copy !req
553. - He's got his voice back.
- It wasn't an ischemic attack.Copy !req
554. It wasn't a seizure.
You saw the x-rays, Mason.Copy !req
555. There was something anterior to
the larynx, looked like a laryngeal sac.Copy !req
556. That's strictly simian.
I obviously regressed...Copy !req
557. to some quasi-simian creature.Copy !req
558. I'm gonna show these to someone.
You're reading them wrong. That's all.Copy !req
559. No one is going to tell me...Copy !req
560. you de-differentiated
your goddamn genetic structure...Copy !req
561. for four goddamn hours
and then reconstituted.Copy !req
562. I'm a professor of endocrinology
at Harvard Medical School.Copy !req
563. I'm an attending physician
at Peter Bent Brigham Hospital.Copy !req
564. I'm a contributing editor to the
American Journal of Endocrinology.Copy !req
565. And I'm a fellow and vice president of the
Eastern Association of Endocrinologists...Copy !req
566. and president of the Journal Club!Copy !req
567. I'm not going to listen to any more...Copy !req
568. of your cabalistic, quantum,
frigging, dumb, limbo mumbo jumbo.Copy !req
569. I'm gonna show these to a radiologist.Copy !req
570. - Do me a favor.
- Conclusion: bilateral aspiration pneumonia.Copy !req
571. - Do me a favor and take a look at these.
- What's the story of this case?Copy !req
572. A 35-year-old white male, acute onset
of aphasia, no history of trauma.Copy !req
573. What are you looking for?Copy !req
574. It looks to me like the architecture
is somewhat abnormal.Copy !req
575. Somewhat?Copy !req
576. This guy is a fucking gorilla.Copy !req
577. Are you okay, Dr. Jessup?
Yes.Copy !req
578. Ah!Copy !req
579. Are you all right, Dr. Jessup?Copy !req
580. I'm fine.Copy !req
581. I just want to make a few notes.Copy !req
582. Argh!Copy !req
583. Mr. Daniel Craig,
Mr. Daniel Craig, please come...Copy !req
584. Emily.
- ... to information, American Airlines.Copy !req
585. My God, you look so marvelous.Copy !req
586. How have you been, Eddie?Copy !req
587. - Just fine. You?
- Fine.Copy !req
588. Look, there's your dad.Copy !req
589. Are you going to drive us
to our new house?Copy !req
590. You bet your life.
Depending how nice you are...Copy !req
591. may even take you
to a Chinese restaurant.Copy !req
592. Anyway, don't let anybody tell you
baboons aren't occasionally carnivorous.Copy !req
593. I observed instances of predation...Copy !req
594. which involved the unmistakable
behavior of hunters.Copy !req
595. A pair of baboons killed
a Thomson's gazelle and ate it.Copy !req
596. There was even
a rudimentary communication...Copy !req
597. between the two baboons.Copy !req
598. So I've become fascinated
with the work...Copy !req
599. being done on nonverbal communication
with apes.Copy !req
600. I've been corresponding
with the University of Nevada.Copy !req
601. I may just go out and spend
a couple of weeks there this summer.Copy !req
602. I've got nothing else to do
except write my report.Copy !req
603. I don't suppose you recorded
any of those baboon sounds?Copy !req
604. Yes, of course I did. Why?Copy !req
605. I'd like very much to hear them.Copy !req
606. Of course.Copy !req
607. Mrs. Tally said she'll be here
tomorrow morning at 10:30...Copy !req
608. to help you put everything away.Copy !req
609. She wanted to know if you wanted her
to come back to work steady.Copy !req
610. I got a letter from Mason
about a week ago, just before we left Nairobi.Copy !req
611. He says that you've been working
with a very complex drug...Copy !req
612. which you brought back from Mexico.Copy !req
613. It hasn't been thoroughly tested yet
and is dangerous as hell.Copy !req
614. What else did Mason write you?Copy !req
615. That over the past year you've taken
about two grams of that drug yourself...Copy !req
616. and that you had a very unusual instance
of genetic regression...Copy !req
617. about three months ago.Copy !req
618. You may have leukemia or lymphoma.Copy !req
619. He's been trying to get you in for a
complete workup but you've refused to go.Copy !req
620. He's worried stiff that you're cracking up.Copy !req
621. He thinks you're behaving
very strangely...Copy !req
622. and he begged me to talk to you
about this when I got back.Copy !req
623. Mason is pathologically incapable
of keeping his mouth shut.Copy !req
624. - He's worried.
- He's a stupid, doctrinaire idiot.Copy !req
625. - Mason is a first-rate doctor.
- It's not leukemia.Copy !req
626. Or any other kind of cancer.Copy !req
627. I've let him do a liver-spleen scan
on me and a CAT scan.Copy !req
628. I have been probed,
scoped and palpated.Copy !req
629. Mason's had a mirror down my throat
or up my ass for three months.Copy !req
630. And there is no evidence,
no suggestion whatsoever of cancer.Copy !req
631. What else did Mason write you?Copy !req
632. Which of these has
the baboon vocalizations?Copy !req
633. - I'd like to hear them.
- Why?Copy !req
634. Did Mason write that during the regression
I had an aphasic experience for four hours?Copy !req
635. The only sounds I could get out were
clicks and grunts.Copy !req
636. I've got a hunch they're like
the baboon vocalizations.Copy !req
637. You took blood tests
and the lab report showed...Copy !req
638. some characteristics
of simian blood groups.Copy !req
639. - Also antigens specific to man.
- I'd like to see that data.Copy !req
640. The thing to do is for me to get back
to that isolation tank and try it again.Copy !req
641. Let's see if it happens again.
None of us believed it happened.Copy !req
642. After three months, I'm beginning
to wonder if it happened myself.Copy !req
643. They won't go back to the tank.
Mason's taken over the whole project.Copy !req
644. He's got Arthur up in his lab
fractionating rats' brains.Copy !req
645. What the hell am I supposed to do
while they're fractionating rats' brains?Copy !req
646. Mommy.Copy !req
647. Everybody thinks your father's
going nuts.Copy !req
648. Mommy, when are we going to eat?Copy !req
649. Run along, play with Grace.Copy !req
650. I am convinced that the regression
was triggered by an act of consciousness.Copy !req
651. When I was in the tank,
I entered another consciousness.Copy !req
652. I became another self,
a more primitive self...Copy !req
653. and the drug in some way...Copy !req
654. triggered the externalization
of that other, more primitive self.Copy !req
655. At least look at my data.Copy !req
656. Maybe tomorrow afternoon—Copy !req
657. Don't patronize me.
It's just possible I'm not mad, you know.Copy !req
658. I'm asking you to make a small quantum
jump to accept one deviant concept.Copy !req
659. That our other states of consciousness
are as real as our waking state.Copy !req
660. - And that reality can be externalized.
- You're screaming.Copy !req
661. I've been getting this patronizing shit from
Mason for three months. I'm sick of it.Copy !req
662. We've got millions of years stored away
in that computer bank we call our minds.Copy !req
663. We have got trillions of dormant genes
in us, our whole evolutionary past.Copy !req
664. Perhaps I've tapped into that.Copy !req
665. I want to get back into
that tank and repeat the experiment.Copy !req
666. The most elementary laboratory behavior.
Repeat the experiment. Confirm it.Copy !req
667. I'd like other responsible scientists
with me when I do it.Copy !req
668. I would like
a little consensual validation on this.Copy !req
669. We may have demonstrated
a whole new force in nature.Copy !req
670. For God's sake, don't you agree
it merits further investigation?Copy !req
671. I've got tapes, notes,
everything at my place.Copy !req
672. What time would you like to come
look at the stuff?Copy !req
673. Two, 2:30.Copy !req
674. Oh.Copy !req
675. I just want to get the girls.
I'll be right back.Copy !req
676. I'll get it, I'll get it.
No, no, I will.Copy !req
677. It's 8:30, so get washed
and changed right now.Copy !req
678. I don't want any trouble
from either of you tonight.Copy !req
679. Hello?Copy !req
680. Oh, Mason. Thank you for calling.Copy !req
681. I assume you've spoken to Arthur.Copy !req
682. No, no, I just got back
from dinner with the kids.Copy !req
683. Well, I just don't know what to say.Copy !req
684. I think you're absolutely right.
He's on the verge of a breakdown.Copy !req
685. He was here all afternoon, carried on
like a madman and then disappeared.Copy !req
686. Ordinarily I wouldn't be this panicky,
but I just am very worried.Copy !req
687. - What's the trouble?
- There's an animal loose in the basement.Copy !req
688. - What kind of animal?
- Monkey, I think.Copy !req
689. Charlie. Charlie Thomas.
Where are you?Copy !req
690. Listen, we got some kind of animal
loose here in B-building basement.Copy !req
691. I'm heading into the north corridor,
to the boiler room.Copy !req
692. You guys come down the other way.Copy !req
693. Now, watch your step.
He's a pretty good-sized ape.Copy !req
694. Call the animal rooms and find out
what the hell he's doing down here.Copy !req
695. Must be in here somewhere.Copy !req
696. I'm gonna take a look up here.Copy !req
697. What the—?
Get out. Get on out of here!Copy !req
698. Hey. Get on out of here!Copy !req
699. What were you doing in the tank room?Copy !req
700. I remember large fragments
of what happened, but not all of it.Copy !req
701. You'll have to be patient with me.Copy !req
702. I've had Mason looking all over Boston
for you all night.Copy !req
703. It's okay. I'm all right.Copy !req
704. I suppose getting a call at 2:30
in the morning from the police...Copy !req
705. to the effect your husband
has been found sleeping naked...Copy !req
706. in the city zoo
might have caused you some concern.Copy !req
707. - Yes, I think you could say that.
- Mason telling you this whole time...Copy !req
708. I'm having a nervous breakdown...Copy !req
709. and you figured
I'd finally flipped out altogether.Copy !req
710. I'm sorry, Emily. Forgive me. I know
what a harrowing day I've caused you.Copy !req
711. I suppose you've been sitting here...Copy !req
712. trying to figure out
how to get me to a psychiatrist.Copy !req
713. As a matter of fact, I have.Copy !req
714. I don't know how you've put up with me
all these years.Copy !req
715. I loved you.Copy !req
716. My God, Emily, I don't know
how to tell you this. I really don't.Copy !req
717. The implications are staggering.Copy !req
718. Apparently I entered
a very primitive consciousness.Copy !req
719. All I remember is what was
comprehensible to that consciousness.Copy !req
720. I don't remember, not clearly,
how I got out of the tank room.Copy !req
721. The first thing I remember are the dogs.Copy !req
722. I followed a pack of wild dogs to the zoo.
That's how I got there.Copy !req
723. In the zoo, I hunted down,
killed, and ate a small sheep.Copy !req
724. I was utterly primal.
I consisted of nothing more...Copy !req
725. than the will to survive,
to live through the night...Copy !req
726. to eat...Copy !req
727. to drink...Copy !req
728. to sleep.Copy !req
729. It was the most supremely
satisfying time of my life.Copy !req
730. I may have killed a man tonight.Copy !req
731. I remember...Copy !req
732. beating on a—Copy !req
733. You don't know the trouble I had
getting these clothes.Copy !req
734. I had to go down to the security office.Copy !req
735. They want you to call
the security office right now.Copy !req
736. There was some kind of ape loose
in your isolation tank room.Copy !req
737. Do you know anything about that?
This ape almost killed a security guard.Copy !req
738. You didn't bring some ape
down to that tank room, did you?Copy !req
739. Your watch and stuff are
in your jacket pocket. You all right?Copy !req
740. Is he all right?Copy !req
741. Tell Mason what you've been telling me.Copy !req
742. I want to hear Mason's views on all this.Copy !req
743. I think Mason's views will be predictable.Copy !req
744. My God. There it is...Copy !req
745. a protohuman. The first and original,
truly human form.Copy !req
746. Tiny, perhaps four feet high,
completely furred...Copy !req
747. chimp-like, but erect.
No knuckle-walking. Shorter arms.Copy !req
748. He's moving along so gracefully.
There's two, three of them.Copy !req
749. Bipedal, tiny—Copy !req
750. I'm killing— I'm killing a goat.Copy !req
751. I'm killing...Copy !req
752. I'm eating hot flesh.Copy !req
753. I'm eating the blood of a goat.Copy !req
754. Are you okay?Copy !req
755. Beautiful. Beautiful.Copy !req
756. It sounded like he was having
a bad trip to me.Copy !req
757. Some of these tank trips
can get pretty creepy.Copy !req
758. What the hell was that?Copy !req
759. Did I wake you? It's Emily.Copy !req
760. Eddie, I'm in a kind of wild panic.
I need to talk to you.Copy !req
761. I don't know how to put this into words,
but I think that what happened to you...Copy !req
762. was not just
a hallucinatory experience.Copy !req
763. I've got this gut feeling that something
phenomenological did actually happen.Copy !req
764. That there was some kind
of genetic transformation.Copy !req
765. I don't know why I think this,
in defiance of all rationality, but I do.Copy !req
766. And now that I do, I'm terrified.
I mean really terrified. Petrified.Copy !req
767. So am I.Copy !req
768. I don't want you doing
this experiment again.Copy !req
769. - I have to find out if it actually happened.
- Put the experiment off.Copy !req
770. Until we understand more. Minimize risk.Copy !req
771. There's no way you can understand
this before the event.Copy !req
772. You may cause
irreversible genetic damage.Copy !req
773. I don't think we're dealing with genetics.
We're beyond matter, beyond even energy.Copy !req
774. What we're back to is the first thought.Copy !req
775. I'm trying to tell you I love you.Copy !req
776. I know that.Copy !req
777. And I'm trying to tell you,
this is an all-bets-are-off sort of thing.Copy !req
778. We may be opening a box that may
scrap our whole picture of space-time.Copy !req
779. We might have a link to another universe.
For God's sake, Emily, you're a scientist.Copy !req
780. You must know how I feel.Copy !req
781. Yes, I know how you feel.Copy !req
782. It's very late, Eddie.
Would you like to stay here tonight?Copy !req
783. I could do with a little love
and a little reassurance right now.Copy !req
784. You'll stay, won't you?Copy !req
785. If I come out of that tank anthropoid,
I'll be in a primitive state...Copy !req
786. and impossible to relate to,
so sedate me while I'm still in the tank.Copy !req
787. Otherwise you'll have to chase me around
and subdue me.Copy !req
788. Okay.Copy !req
789. I'll tell you one thing,
you come out looking like an ape...Copy !req
790. and I'm going over to Mass Mental
and commit myself.Copy !req
791. If it happens,
we'll bring him down with Amytal.Copy !req
792. What do you mean "if it happens"?
Everybody keeps saying "if it happens."Copy !req
793. Do you think something is gonna happen?
If you do, I'd like to know.Copy !req
794. I'm sorry. I'm just nervous as hell.Copy !req
795. Listen, so am l.Copy !req
796. Anything happen?Copy !req
797. I just checked him 10 minutes ago.Copy !req
798. Did you order chicken or turkey?Copy !req
799. I hope chicken is all right.Copy !req
800. I've got nearly 11.
That's more than two hours now.Copy !req
801. I think we should stop this.Copy !req
802. I'll tell you frankly, I'm frightened.Copy !req
803. We could be screwing around
with his genetic structure.Copy !req
804. - How do we stop this?
- Can you bring him down?Copy !req
805. - He's gonna be sore.
- We should never have let him do it.Copy !req
806. Don't know how we let him talk us into this.
We were humoring him, but he's not crazy.Copy !req
807. And we know, deep in our hearts...Copy !req
808. that he may be onto something
beyond our comprehension.Copy !req
809. Now, because I believe him,
I want this thing stopped.Copy !req
810. Oh, Jesus.Copy !req
811. Eddie!Copy !req
812. No!Copy !req
813. Eddie! No, no!Copy !req
814. No, no! Eddie!Copy !req
815. Oh!Copy !req
816. Ah!Copy !req
817. Eddie!Copy !req
818. His signs are all good.Copy !req
819. He'll probably sleep a day or two,
come out stuporous.Copy !req
820. He's got a load of drugs in him.Copy !req
821. It's not uncommon for a psychedelic
experience to whack you out.Copy !req
822. You'd hardly call this
just a psychedelic experience.Copy !req
823. His heart is good. His pressure is good.Copy !req
824. I'm more worried about you
than I am about him.Copy !req
825. I'm all right.Copy !req
826. Of all the men in this world,
why do I have to love this one?Copy !req
827. I can't get him out of me.Copy !req
828. Do you know how many men
I tried to fall in love with this year?Copy !req
829. No matter who I'm in bed with,
I have to imagine it's him.Copy !req
830. No matter who I'm eating with
or walking with...Copy !req
831. there's always this pain
because it isn't him.Copy !req
832. I'm possessed by him.Copy !req
833. Oh, it's crazy.Copy !req
834. I think that's the way it's supposed to be.Copy !req
835. - He doesn't give a damn about me.
- You're the only thing he cares about...Copy !req
836. - ... outside of his work.
- No, Mason.Copy !req
837. I was never real to him. Nothing in
the human condition was ever real to him.Copy !req
838. He's a truth lover.Copy !req
839. Reality to Eddie is only that
which is changeless, immutably constant.Copy !req
840. What happened to Eddie tonight,
that was Eddie's idea of love.Copy !req
841. That was consummation. Ha, ha.Copy !req
842. He finally got it off with God.Copy !req
843. He finally embraced the absolute,
was finally ravished by truth...Copy !req
844. and it goddamn near destroyed him.Copy !req
845. He never loved me.
You knew him as well as I did.Copy !req
846. We were all bits
of transitory matter to him.Copy !req
847. All right, now, you're going into shock.
I'm going to get you something.Copy !req
848. We reached a point tonight
where physical science just breaks down.Copy !req
849. We're in blue skies.Copy !req
850. Tonight was history,
and what are we gonna do about it?Copy !req
851. I'm gonna do nothing about it.
Tonight scared the hell out of me.Copy !req
852. That tank just blew up.Copy !req
853. Whatever happened inside that tank
released a hell of a lot of energy.Copy !req
854. For God's sake, let's drop this goddamn
thing. I don't want to talk about it.Copy !req
855. I can't help it.
You may want to go to sleep right now...Copy !req
856. but the way I feel
I don't expect to go to sleep for a year.Copy !req
857. I'm on fucking fire.Copy !req
858. I am in there mopping up the goddamned
tank room and I would like to know why.Copy !req
859. Do you believe in
supernatural agencies, Mason?Copy !req
860. No, sir, I do not.Copy !req
861. Then what we saw tonight
was a physical phenomenon.Copy !req
862. An inexplicable physical phenomenon.
If it's phenomenological...Copy !req
863. then it's explicable. I've got to know why.
Let me talk, for chrissake.Copy !req
864. I have been in there mopping up
that tank room for three hours.Copy !req
865. I've had all I can take.Copy !req
866. I can tell you
what I would like to do.Copy !req
867. We have got to repeat this
with other subjects.Copy !req
868. We need a selective sample.Copy !req
869. We will put up a notice
in the student union for volunteers.Copy !req
870. - Get five or six subjects.
- This is Arthur talking, right?Copy !req
871. Step up the doses of the drug.
- Conscience of science?Copy !req
872. Check them against Eddie's values.
- Petitions against genetic engineering.Copy !req
873. We could even get a grant, for chrissake!Copy !req
874. Big, moral science of the people...
- Bullshit!Copy !req
875. and here you are, willing to use an
untested drug on innocent human beings.Copy !req
876. Please stop shouting.Copy !req
877. How are you?Copy !req
878. Would you like to go back to sleep?Copy !req
879. Yes.Copy !req
880. Would you mind if Mason
had a quick look at you first?Copy !req
881. It's a good idea.Copy !req
882. Maybe you ought to have
a quick look at him, Mason.Copy !req
883. Oh, I hope it isn't the kids.Copy !req
884. Hello?Copy !req
885. Everything's fine, Arthur. He's fine.Copy !req
886. - It's Arthur. Are you fine?
- Yes.Copy !req
887. Arthur, I'll call you back
when I'm more awake. Everything's fine.Copy !req
888. God, I wonder what time it is.Copy !req
889. I should call the kids.Copy !req
890. I can't tell you
how much you mean to me...Copy !req
891. how much I need you and the kids.
I just wanted you to know that.Copy !req
892. You saved me. You redeemed me
from the pit. I was in it, Emily.Copy !req
893. I was in that ultimate moment of terror
that is the beginning of life.Copy !req
894. It is nothing.Copy !req
895. Simple, hideous nothing.Copy !req
896. The final truth of all things
is that there is no final truth.Copy !req
897. Truth is what's transitory.
It's human life that is real.Copy !req
898. I don't want to frighten you, but I'm trying
to tell you is at that moment of terror...Copy !req
899. is a real and living horror,
living and growing within me now.Copy !req
900. And the only thing that keeps it
from devouring me is you.Copy !req
901. Why don't you just come back to us?Copy !req
902. Hmm. It's too late.Copy !req
903. I don't think I can get out of it anymore.Copy !req
904. I can't live with it. The pain is too great.Copy !req
905. Defy it, Eddie.
You made it real. You can make it unreal.Copy !req
906. If you love me, Eddie—Copy !req
907. If you love me— Eddie, defy it!Copy !req
908. Argh!Copy !req
909. Ugh!Copy !req
910. [GRUNTING AND SCREAMINGCopy !req
911. I love you, Emily.Copy !req