1. Previously on Young Sheldon...Copy !req
2. Oh, that ain't good.Copy !req
3. Connie Tucker,Copy !req
4. please stop running.Copy !req
5. A deal can be made
without going to trial.Copy !req
6. You plead guilty, pay a fine,
lose your business license,Copy !req
7. maybe some
community service,Copy !req
8. probation, but no jail time.Copy !req
9. So...Copy !req
10. do I tell them
we have a deal?Copy !req
11. Okay, fine.
Oh, thank God.Copy !req
12. I'm too old
to find somebody new.Copy !req
13. Hi, I'm Connie Tucker.Copy !req
14. I'm supposed to be reporting
to my probation officer?Copy !req
15. You found her.
Come on in.Copy !req
16. Sorry
I'm a little late.Copy !req
17. Not moving
very fast today. Oof.Copy !req
18. Weren't you arrested
running from the police?Copy !req
19. Well, I have my good days.Copy !req
20. Oh...Copy !req
21. Whew.Copy !req
22. So the terms
of your probationCopy !req
23. require you to do 180 hours
of community service.Copy !req
24. And you're currently
sitting at...Copy !req
25. zero.Copy !req
26. Not true.Copy !req
27. I've been reading
to the elderly.Copy !req
28. Oh. Where at?Copy !req
29. Chi-Chi's.Copy !req
30. My boyfriend forgot
his glasses,Copy !req
31. so I read him the menu.Copy !req
32. This is a joke to you.Copy !req
33. Well, I was hoping.Copy !req
34. You think putting
on this actCopy !req
35. is gonna get you
a lighter sentence?Copy !req
36. Act?Copy !req
37. What act?Copy !req
38. Look at my nose.Copy !req
39. Okay...Copy !req
40. You know what this nose can do?Copy !req
41. It can smell bull-pucky
from two counties over.Copy !req
42. And you know what it's
smelling right now?Copy !req
43. A big, steamy pile.Copy !req
44. What kind of community service
are we talking about?Copy !req
45. I can't be up there
on the interstateCopy !req
46. picking up trash
with some winos.Copy !req
47. Well, there are other options.Copy !req
48. Hit me.Copy !req
49. How about Habitat for Humanity?Copy !req
50. Build some poor soul
a home.Copy !req
51. The tornado blew mine
to smithereens.Copy !req
52. How about some do-gooder
build me a home?Copy !req
53. Moving on.Copy !req
54. You own a hazmat suit?Copy !req
55. What? Why-why?Copy !req
56. There's a sewage pipe
under the hepatitis clinicCopy !req
57. with your name on it.Copy !req
58. Let's keep thinking.Copy !req
59. Well, we got...Copy !req
60. animal shelters,
libraries, churches...Copy !req
61. Ooh. Is that any church?Copy !req
62. Yeah.Copy !req
63. As long as they sign off
on your hours.Copy !req
64. Oh, I like
where this is heading.Copy !req
65. Why?Copy !req
66. A good Christian woman
always is eager to serve.Copy !req
67. A Christian woman who ran
a backroom casino?Copy !req
68. Hey, God forgave me,
maybe you should, too.Copy !req
69. Do you understand I have
the power to throw you in jail?Copy !req
70. To be honest, I did not.Copy !req
71. That doesn't go there.Copy !req
72. Doesn't matter.Copy !req
73. Canned beans
next to jarred preserves?Copy !req
74. - Who cares?
- I care.Copy !req
75. Well, no one cares
that you care.Copy !req
76. I'm someone.
And I care that I care.Copy !req
77. And I care
that I care that I care.Copy !req
78. Okay. That's enough.Copy !req
79. Are we done?Copy !req
80. What's your hurry?Copy !req
81. It's paternity test day
on Ricki LakeCopy !req
82. and I'm missing it.Copy !req
83. If people paid
more attentionCopy !req
84. of what belongs where,Copy !req
85. there'd be no need
for paternity tests.Copy !req
86. Just go.Copy !req
87. I'll give you a hand.Copy !req
88. Actually, I'm not crazyCopy !req
89. about how you organize
things, either.Copy !req
90. I need you to do me a favor.Copy !req
91. Hello to you, too.Copy !req
92. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Look.Copy !req
93. I need you to sign some forms
for me, no questions asked.Copy !req
94. What am I signing?Copy !req
95. We agreed no questions asked.Copy !req
96. Given her criminal past,
I'd advice caution.Copy !req
97. Moon Pie, I love you,
but shut it.Copy !req
98. Look, I got to knock out
my community service,Copy !req
99. and they say I can do it
at the church.Copy !req
100. That's great.
We'd love to have you.Copy !req
101. Or you could just fill out
my timesheetsCopy !req
102. and we would be done with
the whole thing. Easy peasy.Copy !req
103. I'm not lying for you.
That's a sin.Copy !req
104. Oh, come on.
180 hours at my age?Copy !req
105. Who knows if I've even got
that much time left.Copy !req
106. Well, then it's a good thingCopy !req
107. that we're gonna get to spend
so much of it together.Copy !req
108. - Hi.
- Hello.Copy !req
109. Don't you hear
the baby crying?Copy !req
110. Yeah.Copy !req
111. She's been at it for a while.Copy !req
112. And you didn't go
pick her up?Copy !req
113. Well, no,
it's still her naptime.Copy !req
114. She'll cry herself out
and go back to sleep.Copy !req
115. Unbelievable.Copy !req
116. Good idea. Let the baby
be in charge.Copy !req
117. No, actually, I left
my mother in charge,Copy !req
118. but I won't make
that mistake again.Copy !req
119. Amanda, I'm trying
to teach her self-reliance,Copy !req
120. but if you prefer to coddle her,
you go right ahead.Copy !req
121. I'm sorry, are you accusing me
of babying my baby?Copy !req
122. Because I am her motherCopy !req
123. and I think I know
when she needs me.Copy !req
124. You were saying?Copy !req
125. Ha!Copy !req
126. You're happy
your daughter's crying?Copy !req
127. I'm happy you're wrong.Copy !req
128. All right, I'm here.Copy !req
129. Clock me in for 9:30.Copy !req
130. It's 10:15.Copy !req
131. I prayed on the way in.
That counts.Copy !req
132. - Mom.
- Fine.Copy !req
133. Call it 9:45.Copy !req
134. Let me just finish up
this payroll hereCopy !req
135. and then we'll find
- some work for you to do.
- No hurry.Copy !req
136. I'm just gonna
lay down hereCopy !req
137. and close my eyes
for a minute.Copy !req
138. Mary, the racoons got
into the communion wafers again.Copy !req
139. Oh. Hey, Connie.Copy !req
140. Didn't know you were here.Copy !req
141. I'm just here to help out.Copy !req
142. That's so nice.Copy !req
143. Well, it's her community service
for being arrested.Copy !req
144. Still nice.Copy !req
145. Well, the big guy
appreciates it.Copy !req
146. He'd really appreciate it
if she actually did something.Copy !req
147. Why are you like this?
I raised you to be cool.Copy !req
148. I am plenty cool.Copy !req
149. Anyway.Copy !req
150. If you have anything
that you need help with,Copy !req
151. my mom is here to work.Copy !req
152. Oh. Well, I do needCopy !req
153. my suit picked up
from the dry cleaner.Copy !req
154. Is that the dry cleaner
next to the nail salon?Copy !req
155. - Yeah.
- I'm on it.Copy !req
156. Or... you know what
we could really useCopy !req
157. is someone to help organize
the donation room.Copy !req
158. That's a big job.Copy !req
159. Too late.
I'm getting the suit.Copy !req
160. I'll get it on my way
to the bank.Copy !req
161. That way, you can start
on the donation roomCopy !req
162. instead of getting
your nails done.Copy !req
163. You're the boss around here.
What's your call?Copy !req
164. Oh, actually, he's the boss.Copy !req
165. What's that?Copy !req
166. He says it's Mary's call.Copy !req
167. Mm.Copy !req
168. Oh, my God.Copy !req
169. We don't say that,
but... yeah.Copy !req
170. This is gonna take
forever.Copy !req
171. How many hours is
your community service?Copy !req
172. Hundred eighty.Copy !req
173. Than you better
get cracking.Copy !req
174. Maybe I'll get
my nails done.Copy !req
175. Hey, we got
any fresh binkies?Copy !req
176. I found this one
in her diaper.Copy !req
177. Drying rack.Copy !req
178. Or... you could just
let her soothe herself.Copy !req
179. What do you mean?Copy !req
180. Well, if you give her a pacifier
every time she fusses,Copy !req
181. she'll never learn.Copy !req
182. So, I should just
let her cry?Copy !req
183. Whatever you think is best.Copy !req
184. Can't you just tell me?Copy !req
185. Hey, where's the binky?Copy !req
186. - Right here.
- What are you waiting for?Copy !req
187. Well, your mom was just
saying if we give it to herCopy !req
188. every time she's cranky,
she'll never learn.Copy !req
189. Oh, is that what she said?Copy !req
190. I'm just trying to help.Copy !req
191. I told you
we don't need your help.Copy !req
192. - We don't?
- What do you think?Copy !req
193. Well...Copy !req
194. Should I go after her?Copy !req
195. You're her husband.
You decide.Copy !req
196. Why won't anybody
tell me anything?Copy !req
197. Six hours.Copy !req
198. All day long
for six lousy hours.Copy !req
199. I gave you six,
you worked four.Copy !req
200. - Felt longer.
- Most people work eight.Copy !req
201. - Most people get paid.
- Most people don't
commit crimes.Copy !req
202. Sure they do.
They just don't get caught.Copy !req
203. So, how'd the first dayCopy !req
204. of giving back
to the community go?Copy !req
205. I sorted a pair of work pantsCopy !req
206. that had a prosthetic leg
still in it.Copy !req
207. Shut up.Copy !req
208. Oh, don't be so dramatic.Copy !req
209. 180 hours, Mary.Copy !req
210. Only 174 to go.Copy !req
211. You're enjoying this,
aren't ya?Copy !req
212. Darn tootin'.Copy !req
213. I got her on my ass,Copy !req
214. I got Officer Thomason
on my ass.Copy !req
215. Who's that?Copy !req
216. - My probation officer.
- Mm.Copy !req
217. Wait.
Rhonda Thomason?Copy !req
218. You know her?Copy !req
219. Yeah.
Her kid's on varsity.Copy !req
220. Nice lady.
Brings grapes to halftime.Copy !req
221. She could get the judge
to reduce my hours,Copy !req
222. but she won't do it.Copy !req
223. Yeah, like I said,
nice lady.Copy !req
224. By chance, would you
talk to her for me?Copy !req
225. I'm sorry.Copy !req
226. Are you asking me
for a favor?Copy !req
227. Yes.
Mm.Copy !req
228. I didn't hear
the magic word.Copy !req
229. How about this?Copy !req
230. Why don't you pay me back
the money I gave youCopy !req
231. for the down payment
on this house?Copy !req
232. Thank you.
Was that so hard?Copy !req
233. She asleep?Copy !req
234. Yeah, 'cause
I gave her a pacifier.Copy !req
235. That's some good mothering.Copy !req
236. How could you not
take my side?Copy !req
237. Sorry, but we don't really
know what we're doing.Copy !req
238. I mean, I don't.
You are a natural.Copy !req
239. We're her parents.Copy !req
240. We should decide
how to raise her.Copy !req
241. Okay, but your mom's
done this before.Copy !req
242. I mean, she raised you.
And you're pretty great.Copy !req
243. Do you honestly think
I'm gonna fall for that?Copy !req
244. No, you're way too smart.Copy !req
245. Oh, cut it out.Copy !req
246. And stop defending her.Copy !req
247. I'm not defending her.Copy !req
248. I was just taught
to respect my elders.Copy !req
249. I'm your elder.Copy !req
250. When I say that, you get mad.Copy !req
251. Yeah, 'cause
you shouldn't say it.Copy !req
252. Yes, ma'am.Copy !req
253. Oh.
Oh, you think you're funny?Copy !req
254. No, ma'am.Copy !req
255. Mm-hmm.Copy !req
256. Hey, Rhonda.Copy !req
257. Coach Cooper,
what a nice surprise.Copy !req
258. Yeah, you know me.Copy !req
259. Full of surprises.Copy !req
260. Like that fake field goal
against Plainview.Copy !req
261. Ooh, that was something.Copy !req
262. But really.Copy !req
263. What are you,
what are you doing here?Copy !req
264. Well, uh...Copy !req
265. you may not know this,Copy !req
266. but, uh, one of your...Copy !req
267. clients happens
to be my mother-in-law.Copy !req
268. Connie Tucker.Copy !req
269. She's a character, ain't she?Copy !req
270. And she asked you
to come down hereCopy !req
271. to see if I would
go easy on her?Copy !req
272. What? No, no, no.Copy !req
273. No, no, no, no, no.Copy !req
274. Yeah.Copy !req
275. 'Cause she thinks
she deserves special treatment?Copy !req
276. Yeah, well, you're just hitting
the nail on the head today.Copy !req
277. Let me ask you a question.Copy !req
278. Would you give one of your
players special treatmentCopy !req
279. if they were ducking practice?Copy !req
280. No, if anything,
I'm tougher on those kids.Copy !req
281. So if I understand you,Copy !req
282. you're saying I should be
tougher on your mother-in-law.Copy !req
283. I just made it worse, didn't I?Copy !req
284. No, no, no, no, no.Copy !req
285. No, no, no, no, no, no.Copy !req
286. Yeah.Copy !req
287. Okay, then.Copy !req
288. Thanks for the grapes.Copy !req
289. Mm.Copy !req
290. Finished the inventory.Copy !req
291. Hey.
Georgie?Copy !req
292. I ran into Amanda'sCopy !req
293. old pediatrician
and he said he could takeCopy !req
294. CeeCee on as a new patient.Copy !req
295. Thanks,
but she already has a doctor.Copy !req
296. Yes.Copy !req
297. Well, Dr. Talanda is the best.Copy !req
298. Okay, look.Copy !req
299. I know you're tryingCopy !req
300. to help, but Mandy al—Copy !req
301. Oh, oh, oh, look at that.Copy !req
302. That can't be right.
Georgie, come here.Copy !req
303. Walk with me for a minute.Copy !req
304. Where we going?Copy !req
305. Shut up.
Keep walking.Copy !req
306. - Are you mental?
- What?Copy !req
307. Why are you arguing with her?Copy !req
308. What? I was just trying
to be a good husband,Copy !req
309. and take Mandy's side.Copy !req
310. Okay, you know a great time
to take Mandy's side?Copy !req
311. When you're alone with Mandy.Copy !req
312. And when you're with Audrey...Copy !req
313. Take Audrey's side.Copy !req
314. Okay, there's hope for you.Copy !req
315. When you're alone
with me in a closet,Copy !req
316. feel free to speak your mind.Copy !req
317. - Seems a little complicated.
- Oh, it is.Copy !req
318. Yeah, life would be
so much easierCopy !req
319. if they just realized
how alike they are.Copy !req
320. Don't say that.Copy !req
321. Don't ever say that.Copy !req
322. We're alone in a closet.Copy !req
323. You said I could speak my mind.Copy !req
324. Yeah, yeah, but not that.Copy !req
325. - So where?
- Nowhere.Copy !req
326. They, uh...Copy !req
327. they'll know.Copy !req
328. Working hard?Copy !req
329. Hey.Copy !req
330. Oh.Copy !req
331. What brings you by?Copy !req
332. Your son-in-law
dropped in to see me.Copy !req
333. Oh, y'all know each other?Copy !req
334. - We do.
- Small world.Copy !req
335. It did not go your way.Copy !req
336. - No?
- No.Copy !req
337. Well, you can't blame a gal
for trying.Copy !req
338. Actually, I can.Copy !req
339. Oh, come on, there must beCopy !req
340. some criminals out there
that you could be focused on.Copy !req
341. Not some old granny
with slot machines.Copy !req
342. Go out there and harass somebody
who actually deserves it.Copy !req
343. You done?Copy !req
344. Yes, I think I am.Copy !req
345. My turn.Copy !req
346. You are a criminal.Copy !req
347. And I can treat you
however the hell I want,Copy !req
348. because I own
your tired old ass.Copy !req
349. And I will make
your life miserableCopy !req
350. unless you shape up
and shape up fast.Copy !req
351. Do we understand each other?Copy !req
352. Yes, ma'am.Copy !req
353. To be clear,Copy !req
354. what are you?Copy !req
355. A criminal.Copy !req
356. And what do I own?Copy !req
357. My tired old ass.Copy !req
358. Mm-hmm, mm-hmm.Copy !req
359. I'm gonna come back
in a couple of days.Copy !req
360. This room better be
spic and span.Copy !req
361. It will be. Yes, ma'am.Copy !req
362. Thank you, ma'am.Copy !req
363. Oh, say hi to George for me.Copy !req
364. Hey, Connie.Copy !req
365. What did you say to her?Copy !req
366. Nothing.Copy !req
367. Just what a great grandma
you are.Copy !req
368. And what
a great great-grandma you are.Copy !req
369. Well, you made it worse.Copy !req
370. I'm sorry, I—Copy !req
371. I did my best.Copy !req
372. Well, your best stunk.Copy !req
373. So now what?Copy !req
374. I got no choice.Copy !req
375. Got to bring in the big guns.Copy !req
376. Wow.Copy !req
377. What a mess.Copy !req
378. Yeah.Copy !req
379. You want me to organize
this whole room in two days?Copy !req
380. I do.Copy !req
381. Oh, boy. Thank you, Meemaw.Copy !req
382. Well, you can go ahead
and cancel that appointment.Copy !req
383. Thank you.Copy !req
384. Gonna kill her.Copy !req
385. What's going on?Copy !req
386. My mother made CeeCee
an appointmentCopy !req
387. with a new doctor
and she didn't even ask.Copy !req
388. What? Oh, no.Copy !req
389. I am furious.Copy !req
390. As you should be.Copy !req
391. You don't think
I'm overreacting?Copy !req
392. Not at all.Copy !req
393. I agree with you.Copy !req
394. Sometimes I just don't
understand what she's thinking.Copy !req
395. Well, how could you?Copy !req
396. You two are just...Copy !req
397. so different.Copy !req
398. Thank you.Copy !req
399. Toy.Copy !req
400. Taxidermy.Copy !req
401. Toy?Copy !req
402. Hi. My name is Teddy Ruxpin.Copy !req
403. Can you and I be friends?Copy !req
404. Nightmare.Copy !req
405. I'll start a new box.Copy !req
406. How's it going?Copy !req
407. What's he doing here?Copy !req
408. Meemaw's letting me
organize everything.Copy !req
409. You're farming out your
community service to my son?Copy !req
410. How about thanks for getting him
to the church?Copy !req
411. Come on, Sheldon,
we're going home.Copy !req
412. But I haven't even started
on the hats yet.Copy !req
413. There's so many different kinds.Copy !req
414. Baseball, cowboy, hard—Now.Copy !req
415. You are unbelievable.Copy !req
416. You think that the rules
don't apply to you.Copy !req
417. And that when you get caught,Copy !req
418. it just becomes
everybody else's problem.Copy !req
419. Oh, come on!Copy !req
420. He's sorting out
a room full of junk.Copy !req
421. This is his Disneyland.Copy !req
422. What about Georgie?Copy !req
423. What about the gambling room?Copy !req
424. He could've gone to jail.Copy !req
425. I'm sorryCopy !req
426. I'm such a disappointment.Copy !req
427. Yeah, me, too.Copy !req
428. Huh.Copy !req
429. Meat's a little dry,
isn't it?Copy !req
430. No, I like it like this.Copy !req
431. You don't think it's too salty?Copy !req
432. It's perfect.
I love your cooking.Copy !req
433. My mom made this.Copy !req
434. Oh, well,
now that you mention it,Copy !req
435. it is a little dry.Copy !req
436. I made it.Copy !req
437. What are you doing to me?Copy !req
438. What are you
doing to me?Copy !req
439. For the past couple of days
you've been agreeingCopy !req
440. with everything that I say.Copy !req
441. You're right.Copy !req
442. Stop it.Copy !req
443. I'm sorry.Copy !req
444. It was suggested to me
that agreeing with youCopy !req
445. is the key to a happy marriage.Copy !req
446. By my dad?Copy !req
447. I don't recall.Copy !req
448. Georgie... By your dad.Copy !req
449. Do my parents sound happy
to you?Copy !req
450. I don't know,
they're still married.Copy !req
451. Well, I want us
to be better than that.Copy !req
452. I agree.Copy !req
453. Oh, cut it out.Copy !req
454. No, I meant that one.Copy !req
455. Okay.Copy !req
456. And if you want the truth,Copy !req
457. I think your mom was right
about the doctor.Copy !req
458. Excuse me?Copy !req
459. Our doctor rubbed alcohol
on one armCopy !req
460. and gave CeeCee the shot
on the other arm.Copy !req
461. He did?Copy !req
462. He did. Look,Copy !req
463. your mom shouldn't have made
an appointment behind our backs,Copy !req
464. but our guy might be ready
for the glue factory.Copy !req
465. Maybe you're right.Copy !req
466. I'm confused,
do I like this or not?Copy !req
467. What are you doing here?Copy !req
468. Helping.Copy !req
469. I thought
I was a disappointment.Copy !req
470. I can be disappointed with youCopy !req
471. and still not want you
to go to jail.Copy !req
472. Finished organizing
the religious items.Copy !req
473. I separated them
by New Testament hokum,Copy !req
474. Old Testament hokum,
and general nonsense.Copy !req
475. Also, Sheldon couldn't sleepCopy !req
476. knowing the room was
only half-organized.Copy !req
477. It's true. It was like my brainCopy !req
478. was itchy
and I couldn't scratch it.Copy !req
479. Very irritating.Copy !req
480. It was. Very.Copy !req
481. Well, I thank you both, but...Copy !req
482. I should be doing this myself.Copy !req
483. Yes, you should,
but we're already here.Copy !req
484. Great, I'm gonna start
on the books.Copy !req
485. I invented
my own Dewey Decimal System,Copy !req
486. but instead of decimals,
I use fractions.Copy !req
487. 40 hours, not bad.Copy !req
488. It might've been 42,
but I rounded down.Copy !req
489. And you did all the work
by yourself?Copy !req
490. Yes, ma'am.Copy !req
491. You know I called your daughter
to check up on you.Copy !req
492. Oh.Copy !req
493. What did she say?Copy !req
494. She said you worked
your butt off.Copy !req
495. Well, there you go.Copy !req
496. All right, then.Copy !req
497. I'll see you next week.Copy !req
498. You know, you were pretty rough
on me the other day,Copy !req
499. and I just want to let you knowCopy !req
500. that I appreciated that.Copy !req
501. You do?Copy !req
502. Well, I think it was the kick
in the pants that I needed.Copy !req
503. And since things are
going so well,Copy !req
504. I was wondering it you might
want to reduce my sentence.Copy !req
505. See you next week.Copy !req
506. Bye now.Copy !req
507. Bye.Copy !req
508. I heard you took CeeCee
to Dr. Talanda.Copy !req
509. We did.Copy !req
510. And he was very good.Copy !req
511. Thank you.Copy !req
512. No need to thank me.Copy !req
513. I just want the best
for my granddaughter.Copy !req
514. Well, that's what we all want.Copy !req
515. Funny thing.Copy !req
516. Uh, Talanda saidCopy !req
517. it's actually okay for CeeCeeCopy !req
518. to have her pacifier to sleep.Copy !req
519. Who's raising this baby,
him or you?Copy !req
520. We are.Copy !req
521. And I think we're doing
a dang good job of it.Copy !req
522. I was talking to my daughter.Copy !req
523. Oh, I love this commercial.
The dog eats the cat food.Copy !req
524. Georgie can talk, okay?Copy !req
525. That's how our marriage works.Copy !req
526. Excuse me,
are you implying my husbandCopy !req
527. isn't allowed to speak his mind?Copy !req
528. Well, if we're gonna
put cards on the table,Copy !req
529. yeah.Copy !req
530. That isn't true.Copy !req
531. - Tell him, Jim.
- Uh...Copy !req
532. Like he can say anything now
that you put him on the spot.Copy !req
533. He isn't on the spot.Copy !req
534. He is a grown man.Copy !req
535. Speak.Copy !req
536. Stop bossing him around.
He will speak when he wants to.Copy !req
537. You want to get some popcorn?
Oh, please, I've been marriedCopy !req
538. Maybe what he wants is
for you to get off his back.Copy !req
539. Oh, look
who's an expert on marriageCopy !req
540. after one whole month.Copy !req
541. Captioning
sponsored by CBSCopy !req
542. WARNER BROS. TELEVISIONCopy !req
543. and TOYOTA.Copy !req